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bellatrixobsessed1 · 4 years

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A Flame For A Cabbage (Part 9)

Iroh furrows his brows. “It cannot be!” He declares. No, the bear must be lying. “Dante Basco is a good man.”

Bosco puts the head of his fursuit back on, cackling maniacally.

“What are you really?” The Earth King asks. He knows that he will receive no answer. Decidedly, he doesn’t want an answer at all. Anything that uses layers upon layers of illusions and disguises is not meant for human eyes. No, he doesn’t want to think about the true form of this abomination.

Bosco makes himself cozy upon the Earth King’s throne. “entewtain me, foow.” He says with a uwu and looks to the Earth King. Years of being treated as a mere pet rather than the formidable and all powerful being that he is, has made him bitter. It is now the Earth King’s turn for humiliation.

“You do not have to do this.” Iroh speaks up. He does not know what exactly ‘this’ entails. But he does not want to find out. And with good reason. Bosco has terrible and horrific plans. Plans that start with yiffing a dragon; he has his eyes on the Dragon of the West, not realizing that he is actually the Pterodactyl of the West. Plans that end with total dimensional take over. He has taken many universes, it is always subtle at first; small tears in time and space that expose those in that universe to eldritch horrors such as himself, moments where universes bleed into each other, and other unremarkable happenings.

Bosco doesn’t know what subtly is, he often confuses ‘subtle’ for ‘bold’.

He has just finished destroying Earth Kingdom Azula’s universe. The woman had made a large spirit canon and had been blasting it off left and right. It was free real estate. He recalls fondly how she had used the spirit canon to cook her toast and, by extension, finally creating the opening that he had been waiting for.

“This is some damn good toast.” She had said to Baatar, who had somehow survived the first time she had blasted him with her spirit canon. “Really damn good toast.”

What Bosco hadn’t realized was that the damn good toast had mutated her eyebrows, giving them super powers. The ability to shoot spirit energy from them. And so he had to eliminate her and her eyebrows.

Though the damage has already been done. He sees that now as a very timid princess and a very irreparably furious Cabbage Merchant emerge. Bosco thinks faintly that he shouldn’t have unhinged his jaw, revealing a bleak galaxy swirling with his gaping maw, to consume the merchant’s cabbage stall.

“This is over bear.” She declares.

“He’s not a bear!” The Earth King shouts. “He’s a...f-f-furry and he might be Dante…”

Iroh cuts him off, “he is not Dante Basco. He lies.”

Azula stares at her potential business partner, waiting for him to further explain.

“He is the Loch Ness Monster!”

Azula swallows, for this is all her fault.

Three dollars and fiddy cents, that had been the agreement made by the ancient leaders. Three fiddy to satiate the eldritch abomination that threatens to collapse their universe. Every hundred years one person is elected to make a noble sacrifice to save the world from total collapse. To sacrifice their hard earned cash.

That person is the Avatar. Only the Avatar master of all four elements, could produce exact change. But then everything changed when the Bumi attacked. On a day in mid-January Bumi had shouted, “I dare you to lick that pole.” Avatar Aang, knowing very well that he had to kick the ass of a Fire Lord, but not wanting to look like a coward in front of his friends who had taken to chanting, ‘do it, do it, do it!’ Had approached the pole and gave it a good lick. Unfortunately he could not pry is tongue from the spot so he remained there until a thick wall of ice formed around he and his bison.

One hundred years passed and the Loch Ness Monster was forced to accept a new sacrifice, a cabbage merchant named Azula. She still has a lot to learn (not that she will admit as much) and no one believes that she can save the world (she doesn’t really want to anyhow).

“I paid your price, demon!” Azula shouts.

“Those were counterfeit bills!” He declares.

Azula gulps, so he has seen through her illusions. “I was in a hot spring, I didn’t have cash on me at the time.”

“Ooooooooh.” Bosco nods. “Well why didn’ you just say so?”

“Because that’s embarrassing.” Jet declares for her. “I mean what kind of madman bathes without carrying at least five dollars on them!?”

Azula shoots him a sharp glare and he mutters an apology.

“Someone who is a peasant.” Sie declares. Man, he has been wanting to say that. “A peasant who couldn’t sell enough cabbages.”

Azula’s eyes widen in both anger and shock. “Perhaps I’d have been able to sell more if some people didn’t keep annihilating my stall!”

Aang whistles innocently to himself as if he hadn’t, at one point, airbended her cabbage stand into a sinkhole. As if his bison never swallowed it whole. As if he didn’t lead a band of angry firebenders in her path who had set fire to her cabbages.

Her fury simmers, but she keeps her composure. She takes a deep breath. “I didn’t want to have to do this.” She says quietly to Jet. “Hold my beer, you gorgeous man.” But she does not have a beer because she is only fourteen.

She takes her bangs in her hands and snaps them off.

“What the hell?” One of the Dailluminati exclaims.

“There’s a reason why I keep my bangs sharper than Chan’s outfit!” She declares as she plunges her ridiculously pointy bangs into Bosco’s chest. The bear/Loch Ness Monster thing flashes a quick owo and lets out a roar. Azula is undisturbed, her cabbages will protect her. Bosco swipes at her and gives an uncannily cute ‘awoo’.

She stabs him again.

“youw bangs wont wowk on me uwu!” He declares. “stab aww chu want~ i am immowtaw”

Azula knows now that it is true. Loch Ness Monster, Dante Basco, bear, the spawn of Cthulhu, whatever else he may be, is undeniably a furry.

She gives him one final stab. When it doesn’t work she narrows her eyes. “Okay, bear, it’s time to face your doom!” She takes a deep breath as she prepares to enter her final form. In a flashy display of glimmering sparkles and a cheerful pop instrumental, she enters her magical girl transformation.

Instead of her merchant’s rags, she now wears a crop top with a cabbage brooch, a mini skirt with a belt of emerald cabbages, and knee high neon green boots. The looks is completed by a cabbage tree hat that matches the outfit only in name.

Having completed her magical girl transformation, she gives a snide wink and shouts, “cabbage canon blast!” She holds her hands over her head and a large cabbage appears, it is outlined in glowing green and glitters in the sunlight.

It hurtles towards Bosco who BEARly leaps out of the way in time.

“Cabbage leaf lash!” She calls and summons several bladed cabbage leaves.

They cut into Bosco’s fur and he gives a yip and another owo!!! “chu wiww pay fur dis!”

He gives a sonic roar which lands Azula on her back. She quickly gets to her feet. “Cabbage lotus barrage!” Several absurdly large cabbages sprout from the ground and burst open, blasting off green energy.

The bear awooo’s in pain. But he gets up and springs upon Azula.

She cringes, it has been a while since she has had to resort to a combo strike. “Cabbage lotus leaf barrage!” The words seem to echo as most magical girl spell declarations do. It is for dramatic effect.

This time when the cabbage petals open they show bladed cabbage leaves with them. Bosco opens his mouth and sucks it all into to his blackhole maw. “Fufufufufu.” He laughs. Azula stumbles back.

“It’s going to be okay.” Jet says as he takes her into his arms. But she doesn’t think that it will be. No one has ever escaped the cabbage lotus leaf barrage.

“It’s not going to be okay.” Azula whispers. That had been her most powerful attack. “He’s going to kill all of us.”

Jet hugs her tighter as Bosco looms over them. Azula closes her eyes. If she is going to die, she is going to finally do it. She kisses Jet. This isn’t special nor is it what she was finally going to do, in fact she has done that several times already off screen. She kisses Jet and pulls out a bottle of green hair dye. Quickly she dyes her hair bright green.

“You’re beautiful.” Jet mumbles into her ear.

Azula nods, “I know.”

Bosco still looms over them, claws extended, bound by the laws of storytelling to wait until their dialogue has finished to strike.

Sie, having become a master at evading scripts uses this time to muster up his courage. He has no love whatsoever for the Cabbage Merchant and her adonis-looking boyfriend. He has even less love for Long Feng, the Avatar and friends. He doesn’t like his brother and uncle either and only has moderate platonic affections for Mai and TyLee. But he hates Bosco so much more. And despite his ill opinions on all of his companions, he can’t just let them die.

Sie throws his timidness to the side and then throws himself between Bosco and the Cabbage Merchant.

#Avatar #Azula #Cabbage Man #Iroh #Aang #Zuko #Mai #TyLee #Fanfiction

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heart-holes · 5 years

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mlm asks under the cut bc im tryna wake myself up to do homework

Are you in a relationship? nooo but i have a boy who i love and whomst loves meee....its complex

Do you have a crush on someone? If you do tell us about them. mhm he’s really smart but about things i dont understand and he’s very kind and goofy and has a voice that melts my hearttt

What’s your ideal boyfriend/enbyfriend? someone who understands me intellectually and can learn to understand me emotionally

What is your ideal perfect date? april fifteenth because-- no um i like going for walks in the woods as a date. one of the best dates i’ve ever been on we just went to a junk yard and wandered around and then found a lil spot to sit and make out for a while it was cuuute

Have you ever smooched a boy/enby? oof these are for people much younger than me aren’t they. yes, i have smooched quite a few boys and nonbinary people (but actually no girls, i think?)

If you went on a movie date what movie would you go see? i don’t really like movies tbh, this is like the opposite of my ideal date bc you can’t talk or touch or do other things while you’re watching...

What video games would you play with your boyfriend/enbyfriend? my ex and i played all sorts of things together (planescape torment in particular </3) but right now? i’m not sure. maybe co op games? overcooked? smash?

Are you a hopeless romantic? no, i’m a very hopeful romantic

Do you daydream a lot about your crush or boyfriend/enbyfriend? yep! im a daydreamer 4 sure

If you were going on a dinner date where would you go? hm...depends on how fancy i’d honestly just prefer to have my boyfriend buy me ingredients and then cook a nice meal 4 him otherwise maybe kim’s? that’s the cheap korean restaurant near our college lol

Can you tie a cherry stem with your tongue? i used to be able to but i’m not sure anymore, i’m out of practice

Have you been to pride in June? If not would you like to go and if you have gone how was it? yep! been three times, once in high school and twice in college. in high school it was a little weird bc i was really sick, but i was the head of the GSA at the time and it was the first time we’d ever made it 2 pride as a school, so it was a big deal. last year my friend’s ex came along and kind of ruined the day for us lmao. this year we had a GREAT time, we went for one of my friends’ birthdays and it was their first time ever going to pride and being like out-ish in public. i made some chalk art, we took photos, we yelled at the rainbow washing corporations and got to ask a leather dom if we could pet their dog (a person in a fursuit). (they said yes!)

When did you realize you weren’t straight or cisgender? i’ve been not straight for goddamn ever like, i probably knew i liked girls by the time i was in like sixth or seventh grade. and i remember considering that i was not, myself, a girl, in like...second grade, and then not dealing with it again until high school lmao

Would you consider yourself an affectionate person? to a select few, yeah

What’s the most romantic thing you’ve ever done for someone? ooh, hard to say. i took someone for a middle of the night walk that led us to a river full of frogs once, and we had our second kiss there and i’m sure i’ve made a lot of romantic gestures for various other partners but i’m like, having a hard time remembering them oh one time the junkyard date person and i had a really nice date where we just went and sat in the woods and drew for a while and that was like, really great

If you had to cook for your partner what would you cook? depends on what they wanted! i’m very good with stir frys, i can make steaks, i can do various kinds of chicken...

Where would you travel with your partner if you two could go anywhere? i don’t have a partner so i dont really know the boy i’m seeing (TM) has visited finland before so maybe there...

If you wanted to get your partner a gift what would you get them? i like to make art for my partners tbh

Do you write love letters to your partner? i love writing letters in general so yes!

Do you write poetry or songs? not generally For People but yes to both, more poetry than songs

Favorite Lgbt+ movie? i haven’t seen very many of them to be honest...the Favourite was excellent, though! saw that in theaters!

Favorite Lgbt+ show? also haven’t seen very many of those! lmao degrassi had a trans man on it way the fuck back in the day, but that’s not great representation, nor are renly and ser loras...ya i got nothing o wait does Moomin count

Favorite Lgbt+ fictional character? slkdfjsldkfj i really cannot think of any of them ser loras of the flowers is deffo up there for me whoops sorry

Favorite Lgbt+ youtuber? skip

Favorite Lgbt+ singer? ryan beatty!

Favorite Lgbt+ meme? lmao it’s moominpapa with a glock

Favorite Lgbt+ book? always gonna b a soft spot in my heart for Annie On My Mind lmao

Favorite Lgbt+ artist? keith haring, dubiously basquiat

Favorite Lgbt+ celebrity? kevin abstract or kristen stewart

Favorite Lgbt+ tumblr blog? uhhhh peteseeger

Favorite MLM/NBLM tumblr blog? cowboymlm

Favorite petname(s)? sunshine, baby, daddy lmao

Favorite date spot? woods

Favorite dessert? really good baklava will drive me insane tiramisu is good too but reminds me too much of my ex

Favorite love song (or favorite song)? favorite love song: a nightingale sang in barkley square favorite song: hm rn it might be...cupid? by ryan beatty

Favorite thing to wear? my favorite sweatshirt and some black jeans

Favorite animal? frog, probably?

Favorite type of Milkshake? chocolate!

Favorite month? september :3

Favorite mythical animal? hmmm i love me a big foot or a loch ness monster

Favorite flower? dandelions or marigolds or roses

Coffee or tea? coffeeeeee

Sweater or Hoodie? depends! i have a lot more sweaters but i do love hoodies

Fall or Spring? both!

Winter or Summer? summer, i think

Frozen yogurt or Ice cream? ice cream plsssss

Cuddles or hugs? hmmmm hugs

Little spoon or big spoon? little spoon unless i am comforting the other person, in which case i am big spoon

Gazing at the stars with your partner or watching the sunset together? oh both of these sound lovely

Movie theater or park date? PARK

Forehead kisses or kisses on the cheek? cheek kisses are kinda hot forehead kisses are cute

Sitting on their lap or laying your head down on their lap? laying my head down! pet my hair!!!

Circus date or fair/carnival date? kind of neither tbh but like, i guess fair?

Strawberries or cherries? ooh hard question. strawberries i think, but i looove cherries also

Peaches or plums? peaches!!!

Matte or glitter? GLITTER

Dunkin Donuts or Krispy Kream? dunkin lmao i’m a northeast boy

Flamboyant or reserved? flamboyant usually, sometimes reserved

Pastel colors or dark colors? neither give me that neon

Cats or reptiles? B O T H

Doughnuts or Bagels? oooh both. doughnuts maybe a little more tho

Pastel rainbow or regular rainbow? regular rainbow

Cowboy partner or Goth partner? either but i tend to lean a little more toward goths

Yeehaw or be gay do crime? i say both, but i say yeehaw more often

Video games or board games? board games pls god i love a board game

Plushies or figures? plusHIES

The sun or the moon? the sun!!!

Bears or dogs? BEARS

Red roses or white roses? pink or yellow roses are myy faves actually

#mine #text #long post

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