#good morning. feeling so so normal today :)

[soldier-poet-king]

Anyway I'm eating a chocolate bar for breakfast

#the duality of fran #this is a new low #i dont even feel low tho i feel good and kinda happy #i just really wanted a chocolate bar. i rarely indulge this much and for breakfast no less #but im just. yeah! im gonna eat chocolate for breakfast #normally i have breakfast on break at work and its super healthy #today. i deserve a lil treat #for no other reason than i am glad to be alive this morning #catsitting all next week which means being out of my parents house #and downtown and close to THINGS AND PEOPLE #i can just have a casual coffee in a cafe a weekend morning. go shopping. wander around the thrift markets #The possibilities are endless when u are within walking distance of things #im SO excited over this little thing. it shouldnt be a big deal. but my heart is so happy #even if the living out of my suitcase in another person's living space is anxiety inducing for me #bc routines and all that #GOD if rent wasnt insane in the city i would be so happy to move into a community #where everything is accessible by walking or. a short subway trip #I MISS THAT KIND OF LIFE SO BAD OK

[arthur-r]

something’s just not right / there’s hunger in my eyes, but you’re not looking into mine / in the morning light / i wake up next to you, but we’re no longer entwined / i want to love you with a ravenous hunger, tear your flesh into mine / you say you like me, but you’d rather that i listen quiet, keep it all inside / i romanticize a lust for blood and the glint of evil in your eyes / any kind of sign, something to tell me that your heart is burning just like mine / rend me to pieces if that’s what it takes to tell me that i taste divine / there’s something wrong but i just can’t quite place it, leave me on the precipice, i’m fine / something awakening and stirring inside me / i’m gearing up, your pretense in decline / i slice my heart up on a platter and find that you don’t even wanna dine / i gave my soul up, you can eat me raw / diced up and vulnerable, i’m yours to try / you’re glancing to the side, bored, and find that you don’t even wanna dine!!!!

#round 2 of recording my loser boring cannibalism song #(it has more words now. it is still not a complete song but it is getting somewhere….) #basically i really like cannibalism as a literary device and devouring somebody and being like violently enamored #and i convinced myself that my relationship was really good and healthy and i just don’t know how to handle a Good Normal Relationship #but secretly loving somebody should be at least a LITTLE BIT like cannibalism. especially if you’re me #so i got really hungry and he didn’t ever lift a finger for me or smile in my direction #and i wish he would just be hungry for me back. kill me a little bit if it would mean you care #i just thought that Normal People should be Normal about each other and he was just being Normal about me #when he like. did not prioritize me ever. and was only affectionate when he was drunk 🫠 #he does NOT deserve to be the one who ended the relationship!!!! #anyway i would rather he eat me alive than not even look at me. and that’s what this song is about #and i’m gonna raise my standards so much fucking higher. he should be fucking hungry for me actually #literally and figuratively shdhdf i was always the one to invite him to dinner too. #and he was SHIT at communion motif. that guy had awful fucking table manners why did i date him #anyway shdhdf. idk here is round two of my hungry song #i’ve already changed the lyrics a little since recording this a couple mornings ago but it’s FINE my roommate is in here so can’t re-record #but: there’s something wrong but i’m not ready to face it. actually. cause it was so fucking obvious i was just willfully ignorant #anyways!! i’m feeling a little weird today and i haven’t done anything and i want to play music but i can’t. so i’m posting a song instead #and later i might be going to a concert?? we’ll see. if i’m feeling better physically by then!! #anyway i hope everybody is doing okay and lmk if you need anything!! sincerely arthur #me. my post. mine. #delete later (probably) #music

[todayisafridaynight]

No thoughts today. Yet. Just this image...

Maybe it doesn't really suit his personality, but sometimes I wish 2000s Y7Jo had long hair like RGGJo...

i cant express Enough this is the vibe this morning

#snap chats #AND IF I SAID I GOT UP AND PACED MY KITCHEN FOR LIKE TEN MINUTESVLKAJVL #good morning mr tsutsumi.. feeling very normal today feeling incredibly respectful #OK BUT BACK ON TOPIC /SORRY/ #yeah what WOULD Y7Jo look like with long hair.. ik we're all aware of the RGGJo Over Y7Jo mod but that's post timeskip #much to think about... #only vaguely related sending this particular picture is So Timely because this morning i was thinking of 20's jo with eyeliner #an on-and-off thought i have but nothing i think ill ever do with but still... #i have to go back to pacing in my kitchen. If I May.

[deevotee]

i wont lie sometimes its a little crazy to see people shove bardroy aside to assign sebastian the role of Dad™ cuz as much as i like dadbastian (with seb being just terrible and weird in the role lmao) i think its strange to put bardroy into the 'weird uncle' role

on top of it being a very nuclear family set up (with ppl assigning mei rin the role of mom/aunt and snake being someones child along with bards role for some reason??) its just kind of forgetting that like,,, he's the only one aside from tanaka who ACTUALLY has experience raising children and was actually a father

#also i hold dadbard looking out for finny very near and dear to my heart #like thats probably the most normal mentor/mentee relationship in that household #i would say soma and agni hold that spot too but bard wont sit there worshipping finny so #they definitely are more normal #basically when i see people ignore the fact that finny literally sleeps #in the same room as bard and stays behind with him and mei #just to say that sebs the only 'father figure' in finnys life #i see red a tiny bit #like sebastian doesn even have the complicated feelings of love and grief #from looking at this young blond kid that bard can get all the time! #let him look out for and be a father figure in finnys life! #hes more than a weird uncle! #(also i havent fully seen the flashbacks yet but wasnt he hired #to be like the most normal person in that household? weird uncle does NOT fit him) #anyways i just took a shower and im off my adhd meds good morning yall #sorry if im all over the place today lmao #headcanons #bardroy #black butler #dadbard #dadbastian #for the ppl who mute that #devo speaks

[s-ccaam-era-crepe]

My mom made great soup but I’m not in a soup mood despite being sick and I’m so sad :((

#camera talks #I was wrong before. there is another type of soup I like #french onion soup <333 #but i feel so bad I don’t want soup textures today raugh :( #cursing gods name why did they make me sick now </3 #anyways guess who took a fucking nap this morning lol #it was like 3-4 hours and it was so nice :) #messed up my brain and I’ve been in a resting mood all day but that’s probably good with how sick I am #honestly my immune system is shit rn. this is like the third time I’ve been sick in like one and a half months #(way more times than normal for me)

[mothram]

#diana's music diary #good morning I slept 4 hours but I feel rested enough so it's whatever #last night I picked out some actual names for 'Ghost Girl' #she has been on my mind more and more lately and it looks like I'll be playing her very soon! #feel sick as usual but that's just normal for me as much as I wish my medications worked #choosing to ignore that and try making today better regardless u_u;;

[whosafraidofvirginiawoolf]

definitely a reading to be had here that she's gay and the scar is her lesbianism making her feel insecure and incapable of being normal and joining in life like other woman do, just a thought which i won't expand on bc if carried through it wouldn't make sense fa;sldkfjdksf

#it could like slightly make sense anyway! #yes much of the plot is her being in love with that guy buttttt its comp het and her desire to be 'normal' sooo yeah #also i think the scarring is like a good metaphor and anyone watching it can insert something that they'd relate to and why they feel #that thing makes them incapable of being 'normal' #good morning to anyone joining me now i was supposed to goto lab today but it was cancelled #so now im rewatching a movie at 10am he he

[bylertruther]

it's so fun when you talk about stranger things to someone that's normal and not homophobic because as soon as you start pointing out byler details they may have missed it's like the puzzle pieces start fitting together in their head and the little light bulb goes off and they're like waaaait... for real? 😦 and then boom. we've got another one joining the ranks, bylers 💪😌

#was talking to my mom abt will and el today not even mentioning byler #and she was like: u kno wht i noticed? it feels like at this point will and mike are different from the party #like they're a couple that happens to have the same friend group and when they split up no one knows what to do because they don't know #which one to hang out with #and like they're best friends and the others are their other best friends but it's different #AND I JUST QUIT MAKING MY COFFEE AND LOOKED AT HER AND TRIED TO PLAY IT COOL COS LIKE ....... HELLO?!?!?!?! #welcome to the byler nation ma 😵‍💫🍻 #homophobes won't wanna hear it but ppl who just watch it casually and are normal would see it if they jus had someone show them all the #things they missed. bc the show goes like a million miles an hour and throws SO much at you that you're not gonna catch everything no #matter how much u watch and study tbh #there's too many ppl on tht show tht love it so much and put their all into it tht it's just filled to the brim with hints n easter eggs #but ya :) good morning folks x

[astrxealis]

mobile tumblr's new format what the fuck!

#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚ #as said by lune now: 'tumblr think it's funny' LMFAO <//3 #yk i finally resubbed in ffxiv hehe ^___^ i say finally but i just haven't subbed for like... a week... #and the last time i played was just like 20 days ago..... not even a month.......... #uhmmm. focusing on homework yes <3 stressed for tuesday but i'll do my best :(( #and uhmmm. i did a few lil exercises/stretches in the morning bcs i shld really do that more often ^___^ #and i'll dedicate enough time to gaming/music today! and leave some leeway bcs no doubt i'll get distracted sometime today #and hopefully as i improve my schedule more i can also put in time for reading hehe ^^ and just. dedicating my energy & time well <3 #+ i can still do with more studying >___< but also social life shall not be neglected! #anyways sorry if you don't see me often on social media lol i am trying to get myself more together and i am getting there i think hehe #sooo. i'll play xiv for a bit and then do my homework! i suck w just giving myself time limits so i'll make an alarm #i suck w following alarms unless it's required tho. i'll get up immediately for class but if it's just from normal sleep for a normal day #i will extend it until i feel restless and want to get up and actually do shit LMFAO <3 #okay anyways have a good day everyone !! please don't forget to take care of yourself alright? #btw the format isn't really that bad but i'll need to get used to it and it's a lil weird to me

[cactusdodes]

.

#i woke up the other morning and on my way to work it popped in my head to break up with my partner #i love them and they're so fucking sweet and good to me and we've hardly had any issues. never had a fight and we've been together 5 months #we work really good together and i really enjoy spending time with them #but that morning on the way to work it wasn't like it was a question that popped into my head or 'should i break up with them' it was more #just an objective fact 'it's time to end things. it's over' and it's like something shifted. a switch flipped or something and i can't go #i can't go back. i still love them but i can't enjoy it anymore #i went over to their place night and went to dinner with them and their friends and hung out watching tv #like we have so many other nights #but it felt completely different. it felt wrong. i didn't belong anymore #it all just made me sad #i went hoping that spending time with them would bring it back. would make things normal again #but i just can't get it back. whatever the fuck 'it' is #but they're still so happy and in love and they were being so fucking sweet today trying to comfort me because they knew something was off #and it breaks my heart knowing that i'm about to hurt them #because i don't want to leave them but i feel like i'm being deceitful and fake because #i love them but i can no longer love them how they want me to. how i want to #but god i really really don't want to hurt them #i think i'm having or about to have a panic attack because of how stressed i am at the idea of hurting them #especially because it's already a tough time of year for them and work has been stressful nd i dont want to add to it but i cant lie to them #i can't really think about how much i don't want to do this or how much i'm going to miss them because i'm at work and i can't cry in front #of customers but fuck fuck it hurts #it hurts me just thinking about how much hurt i'm going to put them through #how much i already am because i know i'm acting different #but i'm pretty sure they think i'm just going through a depressive episode or something #bc they haven't fucking done anything! how can i break up with someone who hasn't even done a god damn thing??? #and i never really could see a distant future with them but it was so nice being with them #but it was so fucking nice to have somebody be as into me as i was them and to feel so reciprocated and on the same page as someone #why did that all of a sudden change. just completely out of the blue. completely unprompted #i don't know what to do.. and i'm out of tags. that's never happened before #madi says shit

[bookwyrminspiration]

!!! no longer on crutches!! I have a walking boot and can walk again!! hooray!!

#shout out to my mother for snatching and appointment literally today #got my crutches and splint at midnight got them off at 4:30pm #just 16 1/2 hours baby!! #i was fully prepared for several days this is a significant improvement #also very glad I don’t have the crutches anymore because I found out that if there is a slight barrier between me and getting to the kitchen #i simply will not eat. i did not eat breakfast or lunch because I didn’t want to deal with the crutches. and now I have a headache #dw I have eaten since then and the headache is now fading but like oof #anyway #also being forced to pay attention meant the feelings from my revelation were forced to the side and are no longer overwhelming #i did think I was gonna implode in the doctors chair but then I used the bathroom and it was fine #fork theory coming through !! #now I gotta face that revelation but it’s okay I think I’m good now #also still have an hour at the library #gah that’s three places in one day and I took a test this morning #after getting two hours less sleep than normal #i really just set myself up for a wild ride #this is fine #really though the worst of it is over everything’s chill now #so how’s everyone else’s days going? /gen #tw injury #quil's unholy underworld

[aphroditestummyrolls]

I was feeling so Like Myself earlier, and now I’m like… it was so easy to just turn me into a shaky mess.

#tw eating disorder #tw anorexia #I think I should start tracking my food again #just like my salt intake? and maybe oil? processed sugar? #if I cut out gluten again I’ll drop five pounds of water weight in like a week #I just hate feeling like this I used to be so toned and my collarbones and my hips and my little wrists all used to be so prominent #time to work on the eating disorder nicky fic maybe #I don’t know if it helps me or if it just makes me want it more #I want to be light and small and just drift #im too big my body is too big #recovery feels fucking stupid and bad #some days are so much easier than others— beltane was great! I was so normal!! #today I went to a cafe #to force myself to eat — as per my custom #and I was fucking fine all morning I got good work done #it was only after I ate lunch #now it all feels absolutely crushing I’m crushed #i’m so tired #recovery is tiring I’m so fucking tired

[clanoffelidae]

Well I’m glad I went down that rabbit hole about my aiws as a child because I only knew about my visual distortions and didn’t know about any other symptoms (since that was all I had as a child), because now I’ve learned that occasionally waking up and spending the first 5-10 minutes of my day feeling like everything’s on fast forward, that the music I’ve put on is impossibly fast and my brain just can’t keep up even though I know this is a song I listen to all the time and it’s playing at a normal speed, that the seconds are just slipping away and I’m watching them go but I’m just too slow to catch them, and that my heart is pounding even though I know I’m not having a panic attack because I feel like the whole world is rushing and I just want to snap at it to slow down, is in fact NOT a universal part of the waking up experience that just ‘lol that happens some days, like when you wake up from a deep sleep and feel all sluggish, some morning’s the world’s just on fast forward and you just can’t keep up y’know lol’

Like full on didn’t know this wasn’t completely normal and not worthy of note until like, 48 hours ago. Thinking on it I’m pretty sure I’ve had it as long as I can remember but I only remember the most recent episode from a few weeks ago and have a vague recollection of one a few weeks before that. But I literally disregarded it so thoroughly and considered it so unimportant that that second memory is almost completely gone because it never occurred to me that these were things worth sparing the memory space for. I have learned.

Every day I discover my experiences are not universal

#tachysensia #alice in wonderland syndrome #is the tachysensia from the aiws??? hell if i know #yall i didnt even know it was a SYMPTOM and not just like - a normal thing until two days ago #idfk if it’s from the aiws and i just grew out of the visual distortions but not the temporal ones #but it is a known symptom of aiws and i was definitely diagnosed with aiws as a lynxling #so idk #but still good morning fellow tachysensia havers how are we doing today #honestly since ive never paid attention to it im not sure if i have the extra loud sounds part #pretty sure i do but again never thought anything of it #plus the main way i REALLY feel it is when i put music on #since my apartment is pretty quiet #and i like my music BUMPIN so that’s hardly a complaint lol #‘doesnt this hurt your ears’ yes i like it that way #i get stressed out bc it’s too fast and i feel rushed but it also gets the party started so really i stay winning #GET THIS NIGHT (DAY) OFF RIGHT #AND TURN THE BASS UP #BLOW MY EARDRUMS UP #JUST LIKE A FIRETRUCK #also completely random aside but if you’re ever swimming and it feels like something in your ear just caved in #followed by pain and extreme dizziness #go see a doctor bc you probably just broke your eardrum #dont be like me and ignore it until it’s horribly infected bc it’s an OPEN. WOUND. #that was years ago but typing ‘eardrums’ made me think of it #random bit of advice from my life experiences lol #anyway isn’t have a wonky brain fun lol #i get to experience time dilation #no changes in gravity or velocity required

[voiceshearingyouloud]

Girls be like ‘I deal with my autism so well it’s as though I don’t even have it’ and then they go to a social event that has literally only seven people and even though they know all of the people and their favourite person is there they still get overwhelmed and have an anxiety hangover the next day

#feel So weird today it’s not good #it’s also bc I skipped school in the morning since we’re not doing anything and why get up at 9am if you don’t have to #(another win for the autism lol) #no I’m not obsessive about my routine and following rules. I’m normal about it when I make a conscious choice not to go and I definitely #don’t feel awful for the rest of the day #and on top of that my stomach hurts. #anyway; I’ll do a little bit of work and watch some Dan and Phil and maybe then I’ll feel better #anne speaks

[mothram]

#diana's music diary #good morning yesterday didn't actually turn out so good but we are making that up today hopefully! #I feel nauseous again but that's been kind of normal and I have meds for that now #anyway i've only started listening to mayyro properly recently I really love their sound they make a lot of cool tracks #lots of variety in the music itself and the album art and descriptions are so enthralling!! #this one only got released the other day and the previous track only a bit before so I am excited for more <:3