#he'd be like 'kill me now' instead of being smitten with tony

[ironhusband]

@samrhodey only for you would I ever write enemies to lovers.

~~~

“You need me to be your date to your best friend’s wedding?” Tony gawked at Rhodey. 

To say Tony wasn’t Rhodey’s first choice either was an understatement. Tony and Rhodey had hated each other since MIT, where they both competed over everything. They met in an engineering class and their first interaction was loudly arguing in the class about something they both couldn’t even remember by now, until the professor had to toss them out. Their relationship hasn’t gotten better ever since. They found out they were both up for being top of their class, and ever since, they found time to compete over the most stupid things. 

It didn’t help when they “cheated” with money (Tony) or tattling (Rhodey). They left the school with Tony thinking Rhodey was a stick in the mud, and Rhodey thinking Tony was a spoiled rich boy. 

They hadn’t thought about each other that much since, except for one night three months ago. There was some gala or the other that Rhodey thought was ridiculous but reluctantly agreed to go to because some of his friends hinted it could help him get on his superior’s good side long enough to finally get a promotion. If he knew Tony was going to be there, he would have stayed home. 

Tony was there, predictably chatting up some people, and when he caught Rhodey’s eyes his eyes shone. He left all his suitors immediately to annoy him, introducing him to everyone as his old college friend and by the end of the night, his superiors were so impressed by his connections they did promote him. 

To be the liaison to SI. 

Rhodey wanted to die. 

“Don’t flatter yourself,” Rhodey scoffed, “I need a date to Sam’s wedding and I’m asking you to pretend to be my date.” 

“Look, Rhodes, don’t get me wrong, you’re a very attractive man, but why on Earth would I do that?” Tony asked and then pointed out, “you hate me.” 

“I’ll be the best man,” Rhodey said, “I’ll do best man shit. I will barely have to see you.” 

“Okay, this why me thing is going nowhere,” Tony sighed, frustrated, “why do you need a date to your wedding?” 

“...Because I told my friends I have a civilian boyfriend,” Rhodey said and then huffed at Tony’s judgemental look, “don’t look at me like that! You don’t know! I’m the only single guy in a group filled with people who found the love of their lives. Some found them twice, some have kids with them. Do you know how many blind dates I’ve gone on? How many times I’ve been the fifth wheel? Sam even tried to set me up with Bucky. He hates Bucky. That was the last straw!” 

Tony laughed at his outburst, “oh my god, that’s hilarious. See, this is the reason I don’t hang out with married couples. I know I was smart to ditch Happy when he got married.” 

Rhodey glared at him, “you fired your driver because he got married?” 

“Of course not, geez. God, can’t you take a joke?” 

Rhodey crossed his arms over his chest. Of course Tony would think unemployment was a funny joke. “Point is, I have no other friends but them that aren’t going to this wedding. I’m too deep in and I checked plus one, and if I bring an existing guest to this wedding, Sam would kill me for wasting a seat, and that poor guy already feel guilty about getting over Riley. So, you’re my last resort. Will you do it?” 

“Fuck no,” Tony exclaimed, amused, “what’s in it for me?” 

“It’s Steve’s wedding.” 

Tony paused, “Steve Rogers’ wedding?” 

He knew he got Tony there. He heard him complaining to his assistant about how he wasn’t invited to Steve’s wedding. At the time, he simply smirked and drew a line in his column of wins, but now he could use it to his advantage. He knew Tony would not pass an opportunity to mess with Steve. “Yup.” 

Tony scanned him up and down, trying to see if he was telling the truth. When he found he was he said, “fine. But I am going to be a troublemaker and I am going to bring an obnoxiously expensive gift that they’ll hate and you can’t say anything.” 

Rhodey bit his lip. It was just two days. “Deal.” 

#druwrites #userpavi #its always stevesam in rhodeytony wedding so i thought id switch it up #anyway i think air force crew without established ironhusbands or samrhodey is really funny. rhodey is single and meanwhile sam is a soulma- #tes mangent and carol and maria are little so sickeningly in love #he'd be like 'kill me now' instead of being smitten with tony #anyway this felt ooo as fuck. back to roadtrip fic #ironhusbands #sam wilson #samsteve #Steve Rogers #happy hogan #pepper potts #tony stark #james rhodes #James Rhodey Rhodes headcanon #rhodey #rhodeytony #rhfe #tonyrhodey #iron husbands #air force crew #this is the relationship tony antis want them to have <3