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#he'll make a perfect musketeer
quartztwst · 6 months
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dear quartz,
i love azul more than you do. i treat him WAY better than you ever could. he literally lives with me and late at night we're both asleep in (THE SAME) bed, i spoon him (ROMANTICALLY) and hold him tight to keep all the nightmares and monsters away. 😾 and then as soon as he wakes up, i have a full 3 course 5 star michelin worthy breakfast waiting for him right at the dinner table in front of his super comfy ultra soft extremely expensive chair. (which i will be sitting in and he'll be on my lap ROMANTICALLY) and once my perfect wife finishes eating, ill help him with all of his (boring) paperwork and attend to his every need while hes busy making us some money. once my beautiful amazing sweet adorable wife finishes his work and hes finally able to listen to me and spend time with me, we go out for lunch (ROMANTICALLY) at the most expensive restaurant in the world where they make food without calories that actually tastes good. (im paying of course i cant have my wife paying for us on a date) as soon as we get home, we do some gardening in our backyard and i plant all of my wifes favorite flowers so that i can make him an ultimate bouquet on our anniversary. (ROMANTICALLY) after a tiring long while of gardening, i bring my wife inside and cook dinner for him. while he works on his business papers, im in the kitchen cooking up a nice and delicious meal just for my beautiful wife. in 0.1 seconds, i finish cooking (because i cant have my wife waiting ofc) and we both eat and feed eachother little bites. (ROMANTICALLY) as soon as dinner is finished, we both get up and wash the dishes together. my wife insisted on helping me because he loves me (hes so sweet and nice and perfect) while washing the dishes, we playfully (AND ROMANTICALLY) splash water at eachother and play with the soup bubbles a bit. as soon as dishes are done, we watch his favorite movie ever (its called barbie and the three musketeers) and cuddle up on the couch with my arms around his waist and his head on my shoulder. (ROMANTICALLY) as soon as he falls asleep on the couch i immediately carry him up to our bedroom and gently put him to bed, careful not to wake him up. i then go to bed myself and spoon my wife in my arms until its time to wake up tomorrow. (ROMANTICALLY)
anygays this is one of ur anon pookies so guess who!! :3
Omg that's super cute
If me and azul were even friends, I'd smack him on the back of the neck and hold his hand 🥺🥺
Am I romantic enough like you?? 🥺🥺🥺
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also, i'm thinking about the way the timeline changes if thomasin does find out about emperor belos and all of the future stuff. aka the aftermath of verse 8
because it's no longer "Oh, he'll learn better" or the "he's just a kid its okay" etc etc that they do when philip is a kid. Thomasin's family doesn't bother correcting him because he's just a kid
but with the knowledge of the future? it becomes "no this is something he is actively learning and we aren't correcting which will lead to more issues down the line"
and i think Thomasin confronting her parents about this fact would be enough for them to change how they handle things. her parents begin to sit down with Philip and Caleb, and they don't start out with anything big. they just...start reading the bible a bit differently. They don't actively go against what they're taught by the town, but they don't just let things slide either.
Philip repeats a dangerous rhetoric and instead of nervously laughing it off, Thomasin's mother gives him a smile and says "Let's try to think of this a bit differently." Her father also begins to teach Philip and Caleb that its their 'duty' as the men of the house, to protect the girls. And that means protecting them even if they are 'sinners', and that sometimes what is a sin to one person, isn't to another. He also takes them hunting, he asks them that if to kill is a sin, then why is it okay to hunt? He begins implanting small questions, nothing that completely challenges their world view, but enough that it will make changes to it easier to accept. Her mother begins to implement magic into their daily lives in small ways, nothing that's instantly noticeable, but again, in a way that'll make it easier to accept.
Thomasin begins to take Philip with her and Caleb into the woods. Thomasin doesn't introduce Philip right away to Evelyn or the coven, or even tell him anything of that nature. But he gets to witness Caleb placing the musket in her hands, he watches as Caleb lines up her shot, and he watches as Thomasin and Caleb joke and push eachother around. Watches as Thomasin's skirt tatters, and Caleb attempts to take her bonnet, as Caleb ties her skirt up to her knees so she can walk through puddles. Philip gets to see Thomasin as more than just the 'perfect pious' girl that she is around the village. He watches as Caleb actively encourages this behavior. Watches as they both seem so much happier here, than they ever have in town. Thomasin and Caleb telling philip that they're trusting him. they make it so intensely clear that he cannot tell ANYONE that they're out there, what they do out there, that Philip is now part of the massive secret that they keep. By including him, they're allowing him out of the town, but into their own lives.
Thomasin sits, with Philip's head on her lap, as she embroiders something, Caleb reading aloud a book next to her, and as she looks at the two kids she shares her life and secrets with; all she can wonder is: Will it ever be enough?
Will Philip ever trust her the way she is trusting him? Or is his fate already sealed to be the terrible future she saw on the opposite side of the time pool?
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sicksimpertyrannis · 2 years
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the priest!Bruno drabble (that no one asked for) - sfw
got hit with this cursed idea and just had to write it down in my notes app... (the shit in parenthesis is me talking to myself as i write)
--
"Premise"
priest!Bruno AU centered around the tale of Davey Jones…kind of?? Basically, imagine that Pirates of the Caribbean 2: Dead Man's Chest was a classic book (like the 3 musketeers or some shit) and that book just happened to be the favorite of one young Bruno Madrigal…
When Bruno was a kid he had a (not so) secret aspiration- he wanted to be a pirate. (rats on his shoulders instead of a parrot!! help my HEART) he loved the story of Davey Jones, it had everything: action, adventure, a fraught and tumultuous romance full of drama- a love that could never be (their love could never be??!????). Bruno would spend hours alone in his room, off in another world. He would create new scenes in his mind, write them down in the notebooks he hid beneath his bed and even act them out with his pet rats.
Even now he can remember how fast his little heart would race in anticipation, how the excitement would surge through him, make him feel absolutely wired. Like a sugar rush without the jitters (or the crash). The thought of it suddenly takes him back to that one time when he was twelve years old. He had snuck a jar of fresh arequipe into his room one night after dinner and, over the course of trying to write down and expand on every idea that was suddenly, and constantly, free flowing into his brain for his newest pirate adventure, he had ended up eating the entire thing. At one point he'd felt so jittery that he was sure he was mere seconds away from leaping straight out of his own skin. The lowest point though was the following morning, when he had to "get up" for school. Not only had he not slept a wink but, physically, he felt like absolute shit the whole day. He’d always thought it fitting how that day had just happened to be a Wednesday…Catching himself in his mental digression, a small smile curls at the corner of his mouth. Shaking his head lightly, a few loose curls bouncing against the sides of his face, he absentmindedly tucks his hair back behind his ear.
Even now, as he sits in the high-backed, quilted leather chair behind the paper strewn desk of his private office, he still keeps a copy of that book on his shelf. And sometimes, when he feels as though God is testing him (or is it the devil?), he flips through his bible to the passages he's dutifully marked. Even as he feels the rapid, silken flutter of each gilt edge against his thumb, he'll catch himself glancing sideways at his book shelf, at the worn spine of that book. Sometimes, there's an intrusive thought that wriggles its way into the back of his mind, a quote from the story as old as it was familiar:
"But the pain it caused was too much to live with- but not enough to cause him to die… It was not worth feeling what small, fleeting joy life brings. So, he carved out his heart. Locked it away in a chest and hid it from the world."
He wonders if it's all really been for the best. Taking up the cloth, the vow of celibacy, affixing his unerring gaze to the divine, offering up his full measure of devotion to the Catholic church. After all, it was with wide-eyed sincerity that he'd rendered up his heart and soul to the Lord all those years ago.
Back then he had believed, so desperately wanted to believe, that his gift was an auspice, a herald of bright possibility. Finally, it was his chance to make his family proud. To strive toward that ideal, consecrated life or, as is written in the Code of Canon Law, to "strive for the perfection of charity in the service of the kingdom of God and, having been made an outstanding sign in the Church, foretell the heavenly glory."
"Foretell the heavenly glory" his reminiscing turns sour at the thought, Right.
What has been made abundantly clear to him throughout his 50 years on this earth is that this was something he'd never be be able to do. His gift- his visions- weren’t so much a blessing as they were a curse- a malicious salting of the once-green garden of his aspirations…
((sth about his visions being cursed, they've made people fear him, these people who perpetuate and spread this idea like a plague- he only brings ruin, destruction, damnation- They say he was cursed with the ability to pull back the veil to reveal, not God's blessings, but His wrath. He's regarded as terrible (terrible, yes- but great (HELP ME PLZ)) These rumors are so infectious, so ubiquitous that they've invaded Bruno's subconscious mind, polluted it. Taken his anxiety and tendency to overthink and kicked them into overdrive- or they would have, had he not been so diligent in refining his coping skills. Still, he can't escape it completely. The thoughts and ideas lurk in the dark of his mind, ultimately he's powerless to purge them completely))
Lately however, certain thoughts, certain feelings, have been appearing before him more and more. The errant wondering, the creeping doubt. The warm hands of God that had once cradled and kept his heart are beginning to feel…cold.
If he doesn't keep busy, if he lets his mind be still, he'll start thinking about it. He never grew out of his tendency to fret and overthink, only learned more complex and effective ways of coping, masking, keeping the thoughts at bay. If he's feeling particularly prideful he'll admit he actually considers himself somewhat of an expert.
Note to me: maybe Bruno’s superstitious knocking can be his way to refocus his mind when he goes into an intrusive thought spiral? Mother of fuck it is 2:30am and I’m so freaking tiiiired. This fucking coffee I swear. I know I’ve done this to myself but still…I don't like it.
also, never thought I'd quote Pirates of the Caribbean 2: Dead Man's Chest and the literal Code of Canon Law in the same work of fanfiction, let alone the same chapter and barely over 100 words apart from each other, yet- here we are.
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classypetworld · 2 years
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How To Train Your Dog To Like A Costume
Would you like to have your Dog costumes for Halloween or just because, but he refuses to have you put them on? Does he act as though he can not move as soon as you put a cute fleece or shoes on him? The good news is this can be changed fluently. While it's relatively common that tykes originally don't enjoy wearing clothes, we can educate them to be more accepting – and indeed like – wearing costumes! 
Start Small 
No matter what geste you want to educate your Dog – whether this is a new trick, or to not pull on leash, or enjoying wearing a costume – it's always veritably important to start with small way. In the case of dressing up your Dog that means that you shouldn't originally try to put an elaborate, fancy costume on your Dog. You should rather start with maybe a little arc for his head or a thin sweater. 
By going in a small way and making sure your Dog does n’t get overwhelmed, you'll actually reach the point at which your Dog can wear a full costume the fastest! 
Happy Hours 
Pick a time of the day for your Dog costume practice when your Dog is generally happy and sleepy. The more awake and agitated your Dog is, the harder it'll be to have him hold still for his costume. You also want to make sure that your Dog is happy and not in a bad mood.However, it's stylish to skip the costume practice so that he doesn't associate the negativity with his costume, If commodity happed before that day that upset him in any way. For illustration – if he'd to go to the warhorse and get shots and was spooked and anxious, just stay until the coming day with his practice. 
still, that's a perfect time to get him used to his costume! If your Dog likes to snuggle up with you at night while watching television. 
Great Treats 
Great treats will be consummate for creating a positive response to the costume. You want to have them handy when you start the training process – do n’t make the mistake of having them in another room. The longer of a time span there's between putting on the costume and feeding your Dog treats, the less clear the connection will be for your Dog. 
 Put the arc or sweater on your Dog and also feed him numerous treats in a quick race. Your Dog can fluently have 20 treats just for putting it on the veritably first time. With tykes , you get one chance to make a great first print, so make it count! 
Keep Sessions Short 
You're presumably itching to take filmland and show your cute Dog off to your musketeers, but hold on – you need to make sure first and foremost that your Dog is comfortable with the costume, and that the session doesn't take too long. For the first time, just a nanosecond or two in the costume is fully sufficient. You absolutely need to take it off before your Dog grows tired of it. 
It's important to have frequent and short sessions rather than occasional long ones.However, he'll be happy to see you bring out the costume the coming time, as he remembers the treats and fun! 
If your Dog did great in his first costume session.
Consistency 
thickness is veritably important in Dog training. immaculately you want to put a costume on your Dog every day for a many twinkles. Set yourself a timetable memorial or alarm on your phone and make the costume training part of your diurnal schedule. As a Dog coach, I can tell you from experience that the reason most training fails is inconsistent practice! 
Add To The Costume 
farther up I recommended to start out with a veritably introductory doggy costumes.However, you can and should of course make it more elaborate, If your Dog is doing well. Paying attention to your Dog’s position of comfort is veritably important. If you notice that he's veritably uncomfortable in a specific costume, give him a redundant sprinkle of treats or take it off and try again the coming day. You should absolutely no way force your Dog to keep on wearing a costume he obviously dislikes. This would make him detest all costumes and break your trust! 
Have Fun 
Have fun with your doggy costumes! There are so numerous delightful ways to dress up our tykes , and I'm sure you'll enjoy the fun times that come with it.
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Words can't describe how much I love that our introduction to D'Artagnan and the musketeers in the BBC show is D'art quoting The Princess Bride and then trying to kill Athos while Aramis and Porthos just watch like it's an everyday event for someone to accuse Athos of murder and challenge him to a fight to the death.
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fighterkimburgess · 3 years
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Your CPD/Halloween post has made me smile a lot today. The absolute swoonworthiness (is it a word? who cares?) of Kev as Bond! The cuteness of the Burzeks and of Hailey carrying a plushie T-Rex around! Trudy in Mouch's uniform *chef's kiss* though Herrmann would get to boss her around only in his dreams 🤣 However, imagine the levels of badassery of Stella+Trudy on truck! Do you have any ideas about the good folks of 51 for Halloween too? :)
...oh yes. Yes I Do. SO MANY IDEAS. Surprisingly only one couples costume, but it's PERFECT.
Sylvie Brett is Halloween fucking personified. She loves it. If she's working that night she wears one of those headbands that makes it look like you've been stabbed in the head. If she's not working, she goes all out. I see her as book characters. Growing up she went as Dawn from the Babysitters Club four years running. This year, she's Amy March from Little Women. She tried to convince Stella to be Jo, but she refused.
Matt doesn't really get it, so he normally just wears a mask or something. If he's made to dress up he'll go for the easiest costume of all time, a Secret Service Agent. It's a dark suit and sunglasses, his hair slicked back. Herrmann banned him from the costume after three years running attending the Molly's costume party in it.
Stella and Kelly are Evelyn and Richard from The Mummy. I will take no arguments here, they are the perfect ones for them. Stella goes all out in a flowy dress and thick eyeliner with her curls everywhere, and Kelly loves that it's an easy enough costume for him. They win the couples costume contest.
Herrmann does a costume with his kids every year until Lee Henry got too old to do it. Now it's only the two youngest that will, but this year they're crayons. Cindy thinks it's fucking adorable and it kept the kids occupied building the costume themselves, even if it was a massive mess.
Mouch is Elvis. I have no idea why, but I SEE IT. I see it so, so clearly. Big puffy wig, white suit, swinging his hips. Trudy makes a comment that on the surface is innocuous but is actually filthy, making Kim Burgess spit out her drink. Mouch and Trudy leave surprisingly early.
Cruz decides it's his first year as a dad, he's Homer Simpson. He gets laughed at by Capp and Tony for the idea, but it means he has an easy costume with a baby in the house. Chloe uses a hot glue gun and pipe cleaners to make the hair that they sock glue to his head.
Violet ropes Ritter and Gallo into being the three musketeers. She yells "en garde!" a lot, especially the drunker she gets. Gallo follows her with puppy dog eyes, Ritter asks Herrmann for advice when there's too much sexual tension between people who aren't dating. Herrmann just laughs and reminds him of when Kelly and Stella split up, and the far too long time before Matt and Sylvie got together.
Capp is the genie from Aladdin. He uses body paint to turn himself entirely blue, but when he's washing it all off in the shower he misses a spot on the back of his head. Nobody in work tells him until someone they're rescuing spots it and screams.
Tony doesn't enjoy dressing up, so he insists he's a lumberjack. He gets to wear his own clothes, he has a plastic axe, nobody really complains too much that he hasn't dressed up. He's the one who helped Capp get the back of his head covered in blue, and is also the one who refused to point out that the blue was still there the next day.
Oh man this is long!
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duanecbrooks · 7 years
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Media Impact     It's time to once again let you in on what is My All-Time Favorite. And to remind you once again that I am not nor have I ever been a high-culture maven nor an aesthete nor even a real and true intellectual but am and all during my adult life have been a geek of the Meghan McCain stripe.       Got all that? You do? OK, so My All-Time Favorite Media is...Heart and Soul magazine's 2003 cover story on my girl Robin Givens.               Literally everything about said article shines. The cover of this particular Heart and Soul issue features Robin sporting an especially dazzling smile and is emblazoned with a particularly ingratiating headline: "Robin Givens: On Mike [Tyson], Money, and Being Misunderstood." Open up the magazine and flip through a few pages and there's Robin again, again wearing a notably uplifting smile and bent over rightward in a quite fetching manner, with the words "Robin Redux" on the bottom of the page. Flip through a few more pages and on the "Contributors' Page" there's a pic of the (as shall be demonstrated, very talented) writer of the Robin piece, Janice R. Littlejohn, who is shown to be a not-bad-looking woman, probably (then) in her early-to-middle-40s, herself equipped with a highly beguiling smile. In her space she engagingly compares meeting Robin to "[c]oming face-to-face with the most popular girl in high school. 'It was like meeting up with the girl who you thought you knew everything about, but [then] realizing how much you have in common.'" We're then let in on the fact that Littlejohn is "[a] freelance television, entertainment, and lifestyle writer in California" and she appealingly reveals that she's attempting to make her life more pleasurable with "food, travel and trying to find the perfect couch for my new house."             Now to the Robin piece.               Let it be said first off that my lady looks positively stunning throughout, first giving yet another stunning smile while lying upon her stomach with her legs up in the air and outfitted in Maroon pinstripe pants, a beaded Chaiken tank top, and metal Mare olive heels. Turn the page and there's Robin again, this time wearing a L'impasse white floral gown and a Elisabetta bracelet. Turn the page once again and there's my woman once again, this time decked out in an Anja Flint olive jersey dress, a Stephen & Co. gypsy-like necklace, and a Barry Cord cocktail ring. And in all--all--of the photos Robin has an enticingly cheerful expression.           Here's where we come to the actual Robin article.             The aforementioned piece begins with a rather appealing quote from the subject herself ("I feel okay now. I know what I want instead of what you think you're supposed to have. I know what makes me happy"). Then Littlejohn paints a sensitive picture of the two of them agreeing to eat at this one restaurant on the Upper East Side of Manhattan and her expectation that "[s]ince the media has been less than flattering to Givens [that's a considerable understatement]...I expected her to be guarded." (As it turns out, she was all the while "relaxed and friendly"). Eventually Littlejohn deftly captures, as the two of them walk along, "fans [of Robin] beginning [sic] to take notice--gawking, waving and doing random drive-bys, yelling, 'You look good, girl!'" From there Littlejohn skillfully depicts where Robin was at that point in her life ("At 38, Robin Givens is a woman reborn, clearly revelling in a new sense of self outside the Hollywood spotlight--a nascent inner tranquility that comes from embracing life's simpler things. She divides her time between Maryland, Kentucky and New York...fancies herself a connoisseur of fine Italian and French food, frequents American diners and loves chitlins and pig's feet"). Littlejohn proceeds to stylishly sketch where Robin was professionally (the latter "is no longer defined by the trappings of a box-office-driven career. Acting is simply what she does") and offers up some insightful words from Robin's Boomerang/Head of State co-star Chris Rock ("I'm clicking through channels and see Boomerang and think, 'Hey, what's Robin Givens doing? Haven't seen her in a while.' When I met her for lunch, I said, 'You should get back out there.' It was kind of a pep talk. 'Get out there. You can act'").               Littlejohn's article continues. She elicits from Robin some admirably searching words from her subject concerning how it was like for her growing up without a Dad ("[Y]ou just feel this sort of unworthiness, and the pattern begins there...If you're not good enough for the first man in your life to stay, then why should any of them stay?"), incisively delineates what was Robin's public image pre-Tyson ("Givens has long been known for her love life, beginning with a romance with a Saturday Night Live comic named Eddie Murphy. She's had public romances with Brad Pitt and tennis pros Murphy Jensen and Svetozar Marinkovic, whom she married and quickly separated from") and draws from Robin some telling observations regarding Tyson's words during that infamous 20/20 interview they did by Barbara Walters, which was responsible for Robin's 20-year reign--especially, sad to say, as crowned by blacks--as The Most Despised Woman In America ([Tyson told Walters] "'The best punch I ever gave, she went from that wall to that wall...and she was out.' I thought. 'This is definitely not going to be acceptable.'"). Following are some intensely perceptive words from Robin's good buddy Tiffany McLinn, one of the Lifetime network's Intimate Portrait executive producers ("[Tyson] was really popular, and people were completely on his side...[A]t the time he was married to Robin, and so people really vilified her...She didn't have any rep before [hooking up with Tyson]--it's just because of that marriage [emphasis mine]"). From there there is a deftly-done sketch of my lady's professional standing during that period ("She starred in TV projects such as The Women of Brewster Place and The Penthouse, and she was on her way to box-office stardom with critically applauded roles as Imabelle in 1991's A Rage in Harlem and the next year as Jacqueline Broyer in Boomerang").           Going forth: Our portraitist gets Robin to present some genuinely moving recollections concerning her then-emotional/psychological life ("I had gone through hurt, and I mean it really hurt, and it hurt me and it hurt everybody close to me and it was serious for me, the pain that I felt. So it was interesting to have agents going, 'Yeah, but you're on the cover'"). After pointing out--and this is a fiercely individualistic statement, considering the fact that it's being made by a black writer about a black celebrity/entertainment figure in a black-oriented magazine--that Robin realized "that she was just another cog in the Hollywood machine," Littlejohn's probing gets Robin to freely acknowledge: "At that point I realized I wanted to be a healthy, happy human being, not just have a successful career. That's what I realized was the most important thing to me." Littlejohn, to her great credit, also gets Robin to own up to the fact that "I'm not looking for vindication. I'm not looking for people to go, 'Aha!'"                 And there's more. Littlejohn, with laudable journalistic professionalism, paints a picture of Robin as an absolutely hands-on mother, quoting her as asserting: "Nothing makes me happier," then quoting McLinn as contending that Robin and her sons are "like the Three Musketeers...[Being a single mother is not without] its challenges. But [Robin] is first and foremost a mom, not an actor." Robin then movingly tells of her renewed spirituality ("[Y]ou can call it anything. I mean, I now have a relationship with God") and in time laughing and "carefree," (Littlejohn's description) claims: "I have no ambition for a career." (To this Littlejohn adds: "At least not a career outlined by Hollywood's terms," going on to delineate the sporadic work Robin had done around that time [periodic television series like Courthouse, periodic independent pictures like Book of Love, her then-current work producing the Uninvited series for the Heritage Networks]). Following is a quite sprightly portrait of Robin doing a photo shoot, wherein she's "wearing jeans, flip-flops and a white tank top under a black salon cape" and "[h]er hair is in spiral pin curls, and she's wearing no make up." Littlejohn effortlessly captures Robin's admirable good humor during this shoot ("I think we shoot me just like this, whaddaya think?").                 And the conclusion to the article is honestly uplifting. Littlejohn makes the exceedingly perceptive observation that "while Robin Givens may not have always been in fashion, she has always been popular. Now with age and life experience, she has an outlook that matches her newfound confidence." (Robin afterward shares said outlook: "I know that if you hang in there, He'll work it out for you"). And the absolute end of the piece is outright heart-melting. Here Robin "smilingly" says: "I've been through enough to know some stuff, but [I] still have a lot of living to do. You know when little stuff would bother you? Now it's like, 'This is me. Take it. Leave it.' It's feeling comfortable in your own skin. As a woman."             In sum, Littlejohn's Robin profile certainly, definitely proves the aptness of the title this one IMDb-message-board-post writer bestowed upon Robin: "The sexiest black woman in entertainment" (actually, she shares that title with Paula Patton)--and proves that she's a highly articulate, intelligent, thoughtful person to boot.               Heart and Soul magazine has long, long, long since stopped doing cover-making celebrity interviews. Too bad. Janice R. Littlejohn's Robin Givens article should have won the aforementioned publication a National Magazine Award. Hands down.
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