#i woke up with chest pain

[transsextual]

I don't have tits anymore :)

#top surgery was this morning! came back to the hotel at noon and have just been napping and eating and chilling w my mom #so grateful for these pain meds #havent seen my chest yet bc i woke up with my postop binder on #but tmrw im gonna give it a very gentle wipe down around the drain sites and change out my gauze #so i'll get to peek a little bit then :) excited to see ^-^ #speak

[schizodesires]

Any other schizophrenic out there absolutely loathing ai. Like it's bad enough I have to convince myself I'm real. Ai art and voices and other shit is just making it harder and harder for me to do that

#hazy rambles #i had a dream where the background looked like one of those ai generated videos #and it terrified me so much i woke up with chest pain #schizophrenia #delusions

[bludsfinest]

you know why i just fucking love paper girls so much? it’s because you spend your entire time reading this comic and you’re constantly reminded that there’s no way to change their ending. the girls will eventually go their separate ways and never be anything more than that weird little group they formed during hell day just to ward off the creeps. “your end is your end” and all that shit

yet still, at the very end, when you know that the story is over and that they’re about to all go on with their lives without each other, you’re still hoping that maybe, just maybe, things will turn differently after all. fuck all of those times we were told otherwise, these girls have gone through hell and back together, why wouldn’t they be able to defy destiny?

and you know what? they fucking do

the whole universe be damned, those girls will be friends and they will be important to each other because they’re not just girls they’re paper fucking girls and maybe it doesn’t make sense at all but maybe that doesn’t even matter and that’s fucking beautiful

#> #paper girls #i woke up with a searing hot pain in my chest because i was reminded of how much i love this comic #please i need everyone to read it #i recognise that i mightve gotten off the rails towards the end of the this text post but it is nearing 1AM where i am #im also aware that the ending doesnt necessarily have to be interpreted this way #but they were able to make different choices so to me that at the very least means theres a possibility that they're all still friends #paper girls is about friendship and love triumphing over destiny and you WILL hear about it from me #oh and also #paper girls spoilers

[pastafossa]

oh great and noble Pasta, tell me, did you get to sleep in your own room/bed last night? I genuinely hope you get to sleep for like 3 days straight after all this

LET ME TELL YOU HOW AMAZING TODAY FINALLY WAS FRIEND:

Not only did I get to sleep IN MY OWN BED in my OWN ROOM last night, for the FIRST TIME since the fiberglass nightmare began...

But I slept a glorious fourteen hours without waking.

I woke to sunshine. But, more importantly - I woke to no coughing. No wheezing. No chest pain. No gritty, fiberglass filled eyes. NO. FUCKING. FIBERGLASS. Even after I went over the room with a flashlight (a tiny bit permastuck in the AC unit's sealant foam in the window but that ain't going anywhere).

I won't lie. I howled in victory. I screamed. I maybe cried a lot little. I sprinted around in bare feet like a child just because I could. I thought about going back to sleep because i'm still exhausted and i think i could sleep for a week.

I sent this pic to a bunch of my friends because this is a BED that was SLEPT IN and I don't CARE if the walls are unpainted and I don't have new nightstands or lights yet, I HAVE MY BED BACK.

And the day just got better! Because I'd slept long enough that I came down to my NEW GD KEURIG REPLACEMENT which means I COULD HAVE COFFEE and by that I mean THE NEW COFFEE I WANTED TO TRY.

AND THEN. And THEN when I thought today couldn't get better, I was outside working on hosing off my stuff (since some is still fiberglass coated and it's slow going since I have to be thorough)... ANOTHER package came.

SURPRISE. IT'S A CARE PACKAGE FROM MY FRIEND CONTAINING MY BIRTHDAY GIFTS PLUS A NEW SQUISHABLE BAPHOMET TO REPLACE THE ONE I LOST TO FIBERGLASS.

In short, friend, I have had am AMAZING night of sleep and then a wonderful day that I really really needed after a month of fiberglass and coughing and an air mattress that made my chronic pain hurt something terrible and cut up hands hands and zero sleep and gaslighting and losing so many treasured little things.

I'll still be mopping and sweeping the floors every day, and wiping down surfaces just to be safe, for a few more weeks. I still have things that need to be cleaned of fiberglass, and I need to figure out how to clean out the vaccuum safely since I've used it for fiberglass cleanup. But... I believe we can now say officially, that my room is no longer a hazard, and this stage of the fiberglass cleanup IS COMPLETE.

And I can't wait to sleep another 14 hours tonight. 😩

#the ongoibg fiberglass nightmare #which has finally become less nightmarish #AIR MATTRESS STAGE COMPLETE #ya'll i just laid there for a long moment when i woke up #waiting for a cough or chest pain #afraid to breathe #waiting for prickly glass shards on my skin #and i felt nothing #just normalness #less pain from my fucked joints #i cried so hard in relief #i have been so tired and i have been in a substantial amount of pain #i'll keep cleaning to be sure and to get the regular dust out but the fact that this is just normal dust and doesn't actively hurt me #is so gd huge for my mental health #and the way things feel more maneageable if i know i have my bed and can sleep comfortably #i am just really happy #i have my bed and my room #and my new keurig is here so i can function via coffee until i catch up on sleep #and my friend sent me a package with a new baphy who is the perfect height and thickness to prop up my aching arms #there's still work obvs #i have a bunch of stuff still to clean #and room needs painting + shelving before i can lug all my boxes of stuff up #(and thank god for that because i'd have lost even more things if i hadn't kept them downstairs during reno) #but GODDAMN I can HANDLE that with sleep in my own bed!

[taintedmegane]

i have to be up in 5 hours and i was already having trouble falling asleep for awhile but cpap turned off and wont turn backWait that means the power is out. So cool

unless power comes back before i actually can sleep.... i wont be breathing much tonight 😔

#last time i slept without cpap i woke up with like. #chest pains that felt like heart pains #and considering how much my oxygen drops without my cpap... Uh Oh #medical #bespectacled ramblings

[koritea]

Update on adulthood: heartburn fucking sucks

#i woke up in horrible chest pain lmao #but we're food now I got medicine and stuff #//ramblings

[weaselshaped]

The thing about the medical system is that every primary care doctor I've ever had has mainly been interested in dismissing my concerns as quickly as possible so they can get me out of their office. So I do not see why I should have to subject myself to yet another of these people in order to get a specific medical procedure from someone completely different.

#Shoutout also to the urgent care in Madison where they charged me $700 to be told the chest pain that woke me up in the middle of the night #was probably nothing and I seemed basically healthy so I shouldn't worry about it. Fuck you guys! #I do not like or trust doctors and I would like to interact with them as rarely as possible. This was not the biggest obstacle to my #decision to pursue transition care but you'd better believe it's been up there #self-actualization through email

[khlur]

this album fr calmed me down after yesterday's immense stress

#like thank fuck i simmered down #was so triggered yday #woke up w a stress induced stomach ache + a pit in my chest + and anxiety wadded up in my throat #but i only fell asleep to the sweet sweet sounds of pain remains #Spotify

[glimpseofsanity]

Had plans to wake up at 4:30-5:00 to start working but my body was not having it :') still, I'm happy I could wake up early because I have so much to do and feel like the hours are not enough to do it all

#personal #man I think I have to deliver another scene today but idk if my hand can keep up with that honestly #fingers crossed it can because im stressed enough as it is #my chest hurts already but at least I didn't woke up with the pain today

[wakatshi]

i dreamt wakatoshi had a wife and i woke up in cold sweat with my cat next to me. that was traumatizing bro it felt so real

#why me #why #WHY! #it’s not even the first time.. #my wakatoshi nightmares are smth else why do i have so many #😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 #once i dreamt he had a gf and i woke up with CHEST PAINS #because i cried in my sleep. #i’m not normal i need help

[hellalugosisdead]

i love laying in bed and replaying cute moments with my bf in my head on repeat :3

#scene: i’m at a warehouse rave that my bf abc’s his friends are throwing #i’m walking inside with our mutual friends and we see him at the door #he says he’s staying outside to make sure no one’s dying #i say ‘so if i start dying out here does that mean i get attention :3’ #he IMMediaTELY GRABS MY FACE AND YELLS ‘SHES DYING OF A SEVERE LACK OF KISSES’ AND RAPID FIRE SMOOCHES MY FACE #OUR FRIEND STARTS YELLING ‘GROOOSS GROSS DISGUSTING’ BUT IT DOESNT STOP HIM #IN MY POV EVERYTHING IS HAPPENING SO FAST AND IMD DRUNK BUT IM HAVING FUN AND GIGGLING #he’s so affectionate and emotionally available and silly i love him #half a year ago i was crying begging my abuser to give me crumbs of affection like asking about my day #now i’m living my best life with the sweetest man i’ve ever dated #he highkey saved me #when i was processing my last breakup i woke up w chest pain and nausea 30 seconds after waking up every day #and then a week after The Incident he started staying up until 7am to talk to me #the morning after the first time he stayed up with me was the first time i woke up without immediately feeling sick 😭 #i had butterflies but i wasnt iN PAIN #omg and whenever the trauma brain and trust issues make me feel insecure and mentally ill hes so patient and understanding #we have the same morals and hobbies and interests so he reminded me of everything i love about life when i was at a low