#if only maya could take her magatama back and get phoenix to stop being vague about what happened | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

pinksweatergettingbetter · 7 years

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aight

lets ends this

i love that he's still trying to cheer her up with her terrible crossover idea

phoenix is such a sweetie

“...so we may put this dead lawyer walking out of his misery”

hear hear

just kill me already

“she's now slain two high level clergymen...”

one of which was a confirmed rebel but HEY whatever ITS NOT LIEK YOU KILL THEM IN GENERAL ANYWAY

who gives a fuck this trial is janked

“bahlgilpo’kon hell- the realm of eternal agony”

wow eternal agony is the bottom hell??? thats like the first hell in dante’s hells; youre soft as runny shit kooraheenism.

“there she will suffer the endless punishment of ja’gar by the galuun of Puhlmo’ten.”

SUBTITLES PLEASE

he was killed during the rite but they only found his body like two days later?!?!

what the fuck!?

...and wait a fucking second, he wasnt there when we were fucking investigating BULLSHIT

BUUULLLLLSSSHHHIIIIIIT!!!

two consecutive murders constitutes a serial killer??

every time sadmad sighs and shakes his head i lose a year of my life

Rayfa’s voice is so fucking unfitting; she’s got the voice of a 30 year old woman and she’s supposed to be a whiny-ass 14 year old

do these people know anything about casting??

is it really that hard to get a 14 year old to say a few lines? i was voice acting (not professionally obvs) when i was 14. i sucked, but i was doing it, and there’ve been younger kids working on real shows.

anyway

welp looks like this mcfuck is using a fake name

someone get on that

I'm sorry you’re surrounded by such incompetence, Rayfa. and i mean that. i like you now, youre kinda funny.

phoenix: plus, yesterday, someone told me how the divination seance used to work

phoenix fucking sucks at keeping secrets jesus christ holy fuck just SHUT UP ABOUT THE REBELS YOU MORON

if he says let it go and move on again I'm going to fucking scream

“haha! the police overlooked the clergy tattoo on the back of his neck!”

directly below the stab wound. the clergy tattoo. that has significance in their country.

Why do the Kooraheen Police suck so much ass? They can’t catch a running suspect, and apparently they’re all blind.

HOW DOES THE JUDGE NOT FUCKING KNOW A RELIGIOUS SYMBOL FROM HIS OWN FUCKING RELIGION?!?!?

[insert nahyuta eats (peach emoji)ass joke]

“aren't they utterly different shapes?”

...a... peach... and an upside down peach?!

nahyuta

im gonna blow your mind

this is called a handstand, here, do it with me

lazy ass parents naming their kid “real name”

fuck this joke country

this is some ‘who's on first’ bullshit

RAYFA LUSTS FOR BLOOD

yeah it was freezing on that mountain, of course your estimate was wrong.

i knew this was coming...

hebLINDED HER WITH SCIENCE

BEEP BA BOO BA

“this article is small in size but huge in importance!”

just like my d––

How... did this work? They did a great job of hiding that wound...

also no blood at the “scene of the crime”

yeah not suspicious at all

once again the prosecution blames the detective for something they couldn’t have helped :/

GUARD YOUR ASSHOLE EMA, GUARD YOUR ASSHOLE

HOLY SHIT

INSERT REFERENCE TO ABOVE PEACH JOKE

loud ass clock inside a secret hideout? good one, rebels. super well done.

ahhhh

now that is clever. i like that

although, considering the length of that statue’s beak, he should’ve been impaled right through his body, so.....

you were close, SOJ

glad to see more clever twists though.

game ruins everything with blatant hints

there are other cases where they can tell when two weapons have been used on the same wound

why cant they tell now?

stone sharp enough to cut skin??

your hideout is fucking death trap

good going rebels

youre using serial killer wrong... again

thats a lie, nobody likes swiss cheese

LAY OFF CHEESE YOU PIECE OF SHIT

ILL RIP YOUR ASS OUT

“what you said is total bullshit!! heres what happened; this, this this. and since I said it ,its true! without any proof!!! SO THERE”

phoenix: VALID POINT!

sadmad: bullshit excuse

judge: sounds legit, overruled!

“jeez just toss me an Axe if its that bad...”

“plotting your escapee from this sacred hall?”

yeah well just run out

“you would pin a crime upon the dead, who you know tell no tales?”

did you just forget the whole

soul pool thing or

are you just stupid

aw baby here we go

stop saying 30% you dont know shit

oh my god

whoa whats he doing with the magatama

“wait... i think i saw something just now...”

what, phoenix

what did you see, hmm?

“the power of prayer! yes... it uh... helps you... install listening devices in your secrets base uuhhhhhh...ITS NOT WEIRD

“She has a way of putting me at ease...”

(weeps) my babies

(sigh) its the wife, get on with it

“long years of ascetic training have sharpened my ears”

god the training is more useful to Athena than it is Maya. this is depressing.

make like a mollusc and clam up??? who says that???????

boy you sure fuckin suck at this Mr. Inmee

judging by that KAAHHH Tahrust should have a deep voice, and DD had a deeper male voice blip... why aren't they using it? they've already implemented singing blips and tutting blips, did they forget about the extra deep blips?

or are those reserved for demons?

he is a ghost...

...how far along is behleeb anyway? either I'm blind or the sprite artist forgot to give her a baby bump.

hey yeah! she's barely pregnant! her character art shows that! so its not so much of a stretch that she could be running around killing rebels. Plus, she hasn’t been pregnant for two years...

...of course, its not her, it’s rUHEEL NAYMUH, but still. she’s not far along enough to be inconvenienced by her child.

potato potahto tomahto egg salad!!

stop praying at me, nahyuta.

dont you fucking dare...

dont you even fucking dare

THEY DARED

I SWEAR TO FUCK

i swear to fuck

so. youre gonna blame maya. for the actions. of YOUR OWN GODDESS.

WHO’S GREAT AND POWERFUL AND MYSTICAL AND WISE AND PERFECT.... UNLESS SHE’S BEING CHANNELED BY A DIRTY FOREIGNER?

i just i cannot express how angry this makes me. it doesn’t make any fucking sense and it’s complete and utter hypocrisy. it’s even worse than before; before they were suggesting that the person dressed as Lady Kee’ra was killing rebels in her name, if it wasn’t outright her. Now they’re suggesting it was LITERALLY HER, and remember, these people are UBER RELIGIOUS, and they still have a problem with THEIR IMMORTAL GODDESS IN THE FLESH exacting her divine punishment against people THAT ARE HARMING THEIR COMMUNITY ANYWAY???

yes, vigilantism is dangerous. but it gets a little more fucking complicated when you suggest that it’s the legit actions of an ACTUAL GODDESS.

and even if this is the corrupt government just trying to cover up deaths (which it is) why didn’t they just step in and go “Yeah, another Lady Kee’ra murder. All hail the marvellous goddesses. er diarrhoea kooraheen.”

it would be a lot easier and a lot less messy than taking a kid to court. why do they even want Maya out of the way, anyway? She didn’t know any of the rebels, and she posed no threat to their corrupt government. Yeah, Zealot’s dead, but they literally could have just hired another crazy assassin.

Unless there’s a REAL GOOD FUCKIN REASON for all of this, I call bullshit, bullshit bULLSHIT

i think it’s time to let your head go and move on to another room sadmad

at the same time

...plus they legit just forgot their own lore.

maya can’t summon Kee’ra if she doesn’t know what she looks like.

that was so easy i didnt have to even press on statements; thats how easy that contradiction is. thats how easy it is to remember something stated five minutes ago, and how easy it is to remember how your own religion works. you fuckhats.

oh hey i just realized Tahrust really does call Behleeb his “lovely wife”

aw. how nice. if only they didnt decide to scapegoat maya.

doesn't matter your intentions; you die if you scapegoat maya. you die by my blade.

you ok pal. is an alarm clock really the source of an evil laugh.

“indeed! we leave the alarm switched off at all times!”

why would you even have a clock with an alarm on it in a secret base anyway?? and how did phoenix manage to play it in the hideout if the alarm was switched off?

“those distinctive taiko drums”

fuckin’ finally

ive been waiting for that stupid watch to come back for AAAGEES

of course there was a reason maya would mention traditional japanese instruments...

y’know it’s funny that he would even make that fuckup in the first place. if he’s a plumed punisher fan, he should know how the theme song goes. his wife was at least a big fan, meaning he’d probably have heard the opening enough times to know that Taiko drums weren’t part of it. Furthermore, if he was banking on the fact that the two themes sound similar to pass off the deception, then it was a huge mistake on his part to define the sound as Taiko drums; thats just a needless detail that could get him caught out, which it did.

and if he just didn’t know, well... again, useless detail. always bad. always be vague if you wanna get away with shit.

ah... at least in death, Raheel Namer didn’t have to suffer the Plumed Punisher theme song.

i love that phoenix refers to the show by it’s full title. that’s adorable.

now what’s really confusing me is that that Photo of the fam is stated to have been taken during the Feast of whatever. Which is the same time-frame as Reely Real Name’s death. He’s alive in the photo, Behleeb is in the photo, and the Judge and his family are nowhere to be found. But all those things were huge parts of the case, and they couldn’t have eaten before or after because of the whole ‘you can only eat Ghingil for three hours on that one special day’.

am I missing something or going nuts??

that said I'm so glad i can finally present this photo. it’s been gnawing at me as much as the watch thing.

“trademark topknot”

OH PLEASE JUST LET IT END

ffjglk dlg ljlgkd hey Tahrust do me a solid and just tell them how you died ok

please i have a family

i have stomach ulcers

off-brand logic

i totally forgot that was in this game too

wow.

“hmm, there’s really nothing to suggest a murder other than the red water in the spring, which only Maya would see and probably not question (considering this isn’t her religion and she doesn’t fuckin know how that shit works) and said spring probably empties somewhere, since it would be swampy otherwise. let’s see... i can KILL MYSELF TO GIVE THE RED WATER A REASON FOR EXISTING or do literally anything else... WELP, BETTER FUCKIN KILL MYSELF. ALL HAIL THE REBELS!”

...well at least he saved maya from contracted a blood disease.

tahrust must be pissed that his death came to naught when his own rebel pals gave the secret key to a guy who sold them out in five seconds.

never gets to meet his child... never gets to see the revolution come to fruition... never gets to live happily with his family... all because he couldn’t think of any other solution to protecting that shitty hovel behind a rock.

kinda tragic.

wish i was less angry

“there was no weapon at the inner sanctum...”

did everyone just forget the giant bloody murder statue???

pohl’fuckya sadmad

babe... oh no... don’t give yourself up like this

thats sad

dont

i feel the sad now

shit

“abbot inmee!! summon a physician at once!!’

HES DEAD

WAY TO RUIN THE MOMENT WITH UNINTENTIONAL COMEDY DUMBASS

“but murder sanctioned by the crown is still murder”

what’s murder sanctioned by a goddess? apparently you guys are ok with that one. oh unless it’s a goddess being channeled by a foreigner.

soerry im bitter about that one moving on now

he lunged at you from behind the stone slab?? nice trajectory moron

hang on a second he put reereenaymee’s body in the plaza before prayer time... with the dagger still in him??

HOW DID NOBODY NOTICE THE FUCKING DAGGER

“you need not frame the accused for your crime”

for once Sadmad says something smart

honestly... suicide really wasn’t the answer. even if it was to protect your wife there were,,,,, so many other options

for example, realname’s last moments, as we saw, made it look like he was killed in the Plaza of devotion. You could have so easily made it look like he was murdered there, by some rando, during the rite. The kooraheen police fucking suck at their job, so it wouldn’t matter. but no; you had to die, and blame Maya.... because she was foreign. A foreigner who came to you for guidance and shelter.

STOP AGREEING WITH ME SADMAD, I DONT LIKE YOU

“You must use your law powers to make sure no more innocent people suffer under this shitty law!!

...like Maya did!! .......because of me!!

i love that the excuse is like “there’s no way she could prove it was self defence in this government...” to make it all tear-jerking and point out how horrible and corrupt their legal system is...

...and yet, if we remember Reunion and Turnabout, which also included channeling and self defence... It was EQUALLY impossible for Maya to be cleared of the crime on self-defence charges!!

pot calling the kettle black, japanifornia!

“lol sorry for almost getting you killed cause i couldn't think of a better plan than kill myself”

yea thanks tahrust, coo-al

“I ask that you look after my wife”

er she’s... going to jail... she’s... been outed as a rebel... you do get that right

fuck you Tahrust, you made her cry

“now you can watch over me from the world beyond”

he cant actually, since they retconned spirits being conscious in the afterlife. good going, capcom.

oh man that cutscene was goofy. except for the crying

fuck you Tahrust

Maya: :D hOW y'all doin?!

also according to maya Tahrust didnt leave any regrets behind which means that he totally gives no fucks that his dumbass plan endangered Maya’s life and made his wife cry. Dick.

He doesn't even regret missing the birth of his fuckin child. Ass.

Sadmad: I owe a debt to you, one that I will return––

Me: Eat a rotten egg.

Sadmad: Wha-–

Me: Go on, master of putrescence. Eat a whole rotten egg. Consume it shell and all. You heard me. Insert the egg into your mouth and chomp down. Times ticking, I’m waiting.

i forgot about the stupid butterflies

“So I was thinking, Nick, the legal system here is really stacked agains the defence! It’s really unfair!”

YA DONT SAY

listen to this happy music playing as everyone is forced to come to terms with all this sad ass shit. also it appears we just forgot about that tiny matter of the government literally putting hits out. Rayfas dad. is doing this. Nobody gonna address that?? No? Ok

Maya: QUIT BEINA LIL BITCH

wait what

what is this new sprite

eurhg i dont like it put it away

thats not maya thats a husk of evil

wow. rayfa didnt even know why maya was here training. the bullshit continues to flow...

Maya: deciding what is true and what is false for your people...

the actual truth and lies, right? RIGHT? MAYA???

ergh this is so... corny? schlocky? it feels forced

“Sorry for almost getting you killed anyway VIVE LA REVOLUTION”

Yay! It’s vore man!! i kinda missed his stretchy face.

oh well that

thats just a really anticlimactic reveal of Dhurke

like tada! there he is! and he's gone! whatever; he's just been talked about in hushed whispers for the last case or w/e!

awww the bailiff thinks he can catch a running rebel!! so cute~

“The Steel Samurai vs Dhurke the Rebel!”

MAYA. THE LAST FIVE MINUTES WERE DEVOTED TO EXPLAINING THAT THE REBELS ARE THE GOOD GUYS. WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM???

i love that they keep hammering in that “maya has stayed maya”

see guys??? dont you just feel the magic of the trilogy??? ITS THERE GUYS WE SWEAR

Welp, thats it for that case. Now back to America, to visit Athena and BK, and hopefully to read a more enjoyable storyline...

#sulking over SOJ #soj spoilers #soj spoilers obvs]

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