#if the moderators didn't block it for some weird reason

[stellacaerulea]

Paper announced a new Nikki figurine, and I'd like to make a not-so-short rant on the subject - feel free to state your views on the matter afterwards

Disclaimer: this entire text is my opinion on the matter and in no way an irrefutable statement

This week another SN figurine was announced, with Nikki in an unknown Cloud-style outfit. I mentioned that before in other occasions in the community at large, but why is it that only Nikki gets anything outside of the game?

People constantly come to the quick conclusion that, well, Nikki is the protagonist and all so it's only natural that she gets most of the attention, but there's a noticeable difference between getting most of the attention and getting all of it. The only character to get anything at all outside the game - applies to both Love Nikki and Shining Nikki - is Nikki and, by proxy, Momo.

Earlier I heard in my server that "she is the protagonist, so she's the game's selling point" - fact is, Nikki alone isn't strong enough of a selling point. Anyone somewhat familiar with long-running gacha RPGs knows the other characters are often just as, if not more, important as the protagonist and appropriately, they get a share of the spotlight outside their games.

Think about other games in this segment I know which one you're gonna think about. While the protagonist's story is the driving motor of the game, what we actually hear/read most is the stories of the people surrounding the protagonist, and as a result the game becomes more of a collection of stories of interesting people, and said interesting people gets just as much attention as part of the game as a product as the protagonist does, to the point that often the protagonist is ignored.

Of course we don't want Nikki to be ignored, even though I personally have been finding her a bit flat as a character as of late. But consider: when was the last time we saw artwork of other characters in their birthdays or other big events outside the game (say, holidays) that weren't reflection arts or concepts? To be honest I've seen it around 5 times ever since TW SN was released - April 2019.

Likewise, I made that survey a few months ago, asking if you were interested in merchandise from anyone other than Nikki, to which the crushing majority said yes. And I know for a fact, half the community would be fighting tooth and nail for a Lilith figurine with a sparkly silver dress, or maybe Loen in some action pose [edit: my gf arrived as I was typing and added she'd kill for a figurine of the Goddess of Desire]. We could have gotten a short animation (even if it was live2D mostly) of Ashley's past which is a very popular story and honestly how most people even heard of Shining Nikki to begin with or some slice of life about Aeon and Marina taking care of the personality mirrors in the Ark. But instead, anything that isn't Nikki herself is neglected and treated as secondary even if in practice they are most of what makes the game.

In short, my point with all this is to express my disappointment with how a world meant to be rich and attractive is neglected and the game is treated as if it were only pretty clothes on a silly (affectionate) pink-haired girl. Of course the game would decline as it has been lately. We can have a dress-up with pretty clothes anywhere. Just ask Archosaur.

#shining nikki #it was a long rant in the end #i know you probably saw it elsewhere in the nikkinet #if the moderators didn't block it for some weird reason #but i'll post it here nonetheless #i think it's about time we address that #plus imagine #black hole glow in a ballet pose #with a galaxy coming up from her feet #also sorry but nikki has become a bit stale in the story lately #there's too little building on her feelings and thoughts compared to other characters #the other characters DO look more interesting than her lately

[thought--bubble]

Taking a little breaky break

This is just a heads up for my small little group of people on here. I have come to call my friends. I just wanted to let you all know that I'm going to be taking a much needed respite from tumblr and probably discord, too. I am feeling lost, sad,overwhelmed, and confused.

I know it sounds silly or whatnot, but all of this stuff is overwhelming and depressing, and I feel sick when I open this app at this point.

The best word to use, I guess, would be winded, maybe?

I joined Tumblr in Sept 23, and at first, it was really fun, a much needed escape from my daily never-ending list of crap to do.

I unfortunately learned how crazy this fandom can get early on and the hard way. I had hoped that that was just a one-off due to my newbie ignorance and took it as a lesson learned for myself.

But it's starting to feel like the drama never fucking stops. It just keeps going, and nice people, kind people, just get dragged and ridiculed for seemingly no reason. I will pathetically admit that I am a sensitive soul, and the things I've read and seen have seriously negatively affected me.

When people are catty regarding people they don't like or that don't like them, I can usually reconcile that to a particular degree. People are, in fact, people. Not everyone is going to vibe with everyone, and people will make jokes at others' expense, and it isn't exactly mature, but it happens.

That is what I expected when I heard this was coming. Some catty shit slinging between people who don't like each other.

But that isn't all this was, and I'm having a really hard time with that. I even thought, "Oh maybe some moderately rude jokes here and there where you know cultural differences and stuff could account for that" like I'm from the northeast and we can be harsh out here. So something that may be offensive to someone from another area may be looked at here just as a joke made in poor taste.

I know I myself have made jokes or whatnot, but you would think certain things would be off limits.

I thought I could combat the negative with positives. Silly jokes, little messages filled with love, but even that isn't working at this point.

My heart hurts, and my brain hurts.

And all this stuff has made me question myself. I had a block list a mile long for the longest time. Filled predominantly with people I had never spoken to because I was scared, nervous, I didn't want to accidentally interact with a post of someone who would be upset that I did, I unfollowed blogs I liked based on this same principle. I just desperately did not want to make someone mad or uncomfortable and find myself back in some weird mean anon tornado.

I tried to sus out who would be bothered by my presence and who wouldn't. I can't even know if my thoughts on who may or may not be upset by me were based on my paranoia or a perception i developed or was potentially affected by outside sources.

Now, i just don't know what the hell is going on.

Sorry for the word vomit. Just wanted to be honest. There are some of us out here who are just standing around with question marks over our heads.

Maybe it's because I wasn't here for a lot of that other weirdness. Maybe it's because of early events that shaped my experience on this app, but I for sure 100% need a break.

I'm an odd duck and love this app mostly because it's the only site I've seen where others actively fan-girl over my favorite Ewan character.

But right now, not even my love for Will can keep me on this app, and for those who know me, that's truly saying something.

This post is not meant to badmouth anyone at all. Honestly at this point I couldn't bad mouth anyone because I'm fucking lost on who anyone really is or how they really feel about things, dude I'm just plain lost.

Thank you to those who have been kind. My apologies to those I may have judged or assumed things about based on who the hell knows.

I hope that when I come back, I can open this app without yet another person that I like having a post of them being torn apart. Or a post of a story that I had heard being told in a completely different way and throwing me for a complete loop.

For now I am going to watch Will edits on TikTok and maybe read via Ao3.

Love and healing vibes to all.

#To my lovelies #I'll be back #I'm just not sure when #hotd fandom

[the-npd-culture-is]

Nice blog you got there cherri

ok so i have like fifteen other asks but i need to address this first because it's been an issue for nearly a month now and these anons tried to find my main and did what i think was an attempt at doxing me.

this is a post to spread awareness to my followers, despite the person concerned not being aware that i'm doing this at this moment (i will tag them and DM them about it soon). long post, but important.

i may reblog this with additional info in the future, so if you feel this gives limited information check the reblogs or comments.

these anons tried scarying me off of running my blog by constant harassment for days straight, which thankfully stopped as i ended up blocking them. as you can see they ended up bypassing my block or asked someone from another account to continue the harassment and attempts at inducing fear. frankly, what this is causing me is anger as im not the only one involved in this unfortunately.

one of the first hate anons on this blog was a spam of four or more anons asking me if i was the person the anon im replying to is mentioning here. i didn't think much of it as they came with another roughly dozen of hate anon spam which (surprise surprise/s) disappeared in its entirety once i blocked one of them. meaning a single person was harassing me.

i ended up contacting the person these anons were thinking i was, and decided to not reply to the first batch of hate, as first they had the url fully typed out in the ask and I didn't want to expose the person concerned, and second I didn't want to bother any of my followers with one salty hater. they were as weirded out as me that they got involved into this without any logical link between my main, their main, or this sideblog, asides from the fact that they were one of the handful of people that supported me early on and even accepted in dms to share my blog to a discord server (a small one, but they were excited about my blog and asked if i was ok with them sharing it and i said ok).

i had asked them to not make a callout post on their own blog about this nor to go and harass anyone. which they didn't. additionally, i sent them screenshots of the hate anons and explained to them that i didn't want to put their blog url publicly by answering the anon as I felt it was a safety issue. but they insisted that they didn't mind it and that if i changed my mind about the whole issue and decided to go public i would.

so here's their url -> @cherrifruiti (they're getting free promo lol, hopefully it balances out the harassment and targeting they went through. they're an artist and honestly good friend. we bonded more over this. go check them out)

the insistence of this anon on trying to find my main was confusing to me at first. i did not choose to remain anonymous on here for privacy reasons, hell, not even safety reasons. i deal with worse bullshit on main than here. i wanted this blog mainly to have an anonymous moderator as a way to leave space for the community voices. i felt like a faceless blog was a more welcoming environment than having the baggage of a whole person, moral alignments, blend into a space that's catered towards a specific goal and discussion. which to be fair was a huge hit for my ego. id love to share my full identity with y'all and have the accomplishments of this blog linked to me. but im stubborn and attached to my values.

to put it simply, i did not want to make the same mistake as the admin from @narcissisticpdcultureis did.

that being said, i did not lie on any of my values linked with my DNI. i wanted this blog to be accessible to cluster b personality disorder havers and the wider community regardless of their backgrounds, but with some limits for my own mental health and personal boundaries, that i tried keeping limited. notably regarding discourse. of any kind. and as another addition for resources in the npd and cluster b community. just as another community space, not a monopoly.

despite the amount of hate and adversity expressed from the admin of @narcissisticpdcultureis , i had not made this blog with adversity, harassment, anger, or "rebellion" in mind. unlike how the admin seemed to take my act of creating my own digital space and express emotional distain for my blog for the sake of existing. blaming me of doing so to put them in a bad light, while the only thing i did was point out information they already had made accessible to the public about themselves in their pinned post. which i didn't give a moral alignment to it, just stated that i was personally uncomfortable with it.

i am not condoning harassment, but I will not police your actions either. this individual(s) had put the url of my sideblog publicly in a rant of theirs aimed to put me and my work in a bad light without regards of my safety or mental health, and lead many, potentially themselves personally as well, to put me through constant anonymous harassment while i had expressed since the beginning i didn't want to be affiliated or interact with their blog, and never mentioned their url publicly up to now, to avoid the same scenario that just happened to me from their doing.

additionally, in their rant about my blog, they mentioned another npd culture that apparently was created adjacent to theirs, potentially for similar reasons as mine although this is unknown.

im gonna say one thing.

if anything, i like the attention. you decided that i, a small account, who didn't have the self estime to ever think would get traction, caused enough of a problem to make your, way more popular, blog feel threatened. i feel honored.

my only issue is that you failed to find my main blog, which frankly offended me. now my friend is the one getting all the spotlight instead of me </3

i did not judge you on morality when i decided to distance myself from your content due to your syscourse stance. but i am judging you now by your actions. i will be reporting you for harassment and encourage everyone in my social circles to do so as well.

i am not going anywhere.

#anon #mod talk #ask #asks

[aspecpplarebeautiful]

tw sex mentions

this is probably gonna sound weird but being a sex and romance positive aroacespec person makes me feel really excluded from the community sometimes.

I understand that I seem to fall into a much smaller group of people- most aroace people I've met are repulsed or neutral on sex and romance. but it makes me feel almost... invalid, I guess? especially because it's a result of how my identities work (demiromantic and demisexual.) and some part of me often feels that people like me don't really have a place in the community, and id we do find one there's always gotta be someone who treats us poorly. I actually remember once having some people get mad at me for having the "audacity to call myself aroacespec when I can still feel romantic/sexual attraction in certain circumstances." got told I was invading a space, wasn't welcome.

and idk it's just... weird falling on the other side of things. I understand I could hypothetically just talk to non-aroace people about my attractions and experiences but they don't understand without lots of explanation, or they think I'm making things up (as they so often do with aroacespec identities...) but I receive the same treatment from my own community; accusations of enforcing allo and amatonormativity, faking being aroacespec for attention, etc. I'm kinda just in a weird limbo where I just... can't talk about my experiences.

it makes an already isolating experience feel far more isolating and I really wish I knew how to even go about finding other sex/romance positive aroacespec people so I didn't have to be so alone.

I'm sorry you've been having such a hard time, Anon. It sounds like not only are you dealing with lack of visibility but you've been running into gatekeeping too, which can be really difficult to deal with.

I do think part of the problem is the way social media is set up these days, certain narratives tend to the rise to the top and get the most visibility. Gray ace experiences are important too.

The other issue with modern social media is there's no moderation, which means there's no way to curb gatekeeping. Whereas in a properly run and moderated space, you can ban people for going around trying to tell people they're not what they identify as.

(Also just for the record, there are lots of ace and aro spectrum labels that include experiencing attraction in certain circumstances, and there's always been people who experience sexual and romantic attraction in this community. You belong here, Anon, and exactly as you say in your ask, allosexual and alloromantic experiences are not your experiences. There's a reason you came to these labels and your experiences and identity are valid. If you identify as aroacespec, that's what you are and no one else has the right to say otherwise. End of discussion.)

I'm really sorry you've been made to feel you can't talk about your experiences, gray experiences are so important to talk about and share. We have such a diverse community and ace and aro spectrum identities can be so complex, it's always helpful and beneficial to hear different people's experiences.

One thing you could do that may help is look into the gray-ace/gray-aro and demisexual/demiromantic tags specifically, which are somewhat active, and try and find people there to follow. Seek out similar experiences. I also recommend blocking any gatekeepers. They're always going to use the most emotionally charged language they can. It doesn't make them right. And hopefully one day we can just build better spaces for ourselves that give us more room to talk about our different experiences and find others like us.

All the best!

#aspec antagonism

[reactivatedrockstar]

Rules

I am on mobile, so my tags are very minimal.

Do not reblog threads you are not apart of. This also applies to my headcanons, but I'm confident that the only people who reblog those are ppl who find it and don't realize this is an RP blog.

I'm lenient about this, but do not reblog art or memes from here, as it clogs up my feed.

Don't poop on the floor

You never know what you're going to get with me. You may get a multipara starter/reply, you may get a few sentences. I don't expect you to match my length, especially if I've written a behemoth of a starter... but I do ask that you try to match my effort. If I'm writing a huge reply and you respond with something that doesn't match the setting or context, (and do this consistently,) I'm more than likely doing to drop threads, and if this keeps happening, I'll just soft block you. Yes I do this for fun, but I put abouts and rules and everything you need to know for a reason, and if you can't be bothered to put in the effort to read it, or properly read my responses, then don't even bother.

I am a mobile user. Maybe once in a while, I'll pop onto a computer at the library to fine tune posts like this, but it's hard, if not impossible for me to use the site to its full extent. As such, icons will not be used, tags will be scarce, and trimming posts will not be done the way I like.

Trimming posts are a strange area. I have adhd and autism, so the best way for a thread to be trimmed is with the last response still attached. This way I can remember what's going on in the thread, which will lead to an overall better rp experience. If posts don't get trimmed, I'll just have to make the reply and hit that big red X button that deletes everything before my response, so take that as a warning.

RESPECT MY FUCKING BOUNDARIES. I've had some issues with one individual who sucked me into this Fandom, they refused to take no for an answer, and forced me to rp an incest ship. This has scared me away from the rpc for years. If I say no, it does not mean "convince me," it means no. I have a three strikes your out policy.

Due to this experience, I'm in a very weird place with ships, I currently don't ship Bonnie and I go back and forth as to whether or not I will in the future. You are free to talk about ships with me, but you must must MUST communicate with me!! Even if we have a ship, please communicate with me if you want to change something or break them up, please don't just end it without warning or talking to me first. I'll never force you to ship a ship you don't want, but if you don't warn me first, I will think that you want Bonnie to try and save it.

I have a full-time job as a daycare teacher. I am not always online. Do not pester me for replies.

I like to talk in the DMs!! Please don't think that this is a passive aggressive attempt to get you to reply, as eager as I get, this is a hobby, and I will not rush you intentionally!! Please tell me politely if I make you feel rushed or don't want to talk via dms. (I personally just think that writing is more fun when you know your partners.) That being said, I do not want you feeling like you are responsible for my personal feelings, and vice versa. You are allowed to say no, I am allowed to say no. If you try and guilt trip me, that will count against your three strikes. (And I will warn you dw.)

In addition to this, if you do NOT like communicating via dms, please tell me, and I will stop. If you just ignore me or ghost me, I'm either going to continue to try and reach out, thinking you forgot or didn't get notified, or I'll become intimidated, and think I did something wrong. We're all adults here, we can use our words. You don't have to follow me if you don't want to interact.

I have kept up with the lore moderately well, but if I don't know something, or have forgotten something, do not bully me. I have zero tolerance for it. You respect me, and I respect you.

From now on, this blog is run from a separate blog as well as this one in an attempt to distance myself from my toxic ex-friend. Since tumblr thinks this blog is now run from two separate blogs, DMs will not be able to be used from here any more, therefore, all DMs will have to be sent to @twoiesfnafocs. If there is some sort of emergency, and you need to contact me quickly for any reason, you will have to send an ask, even just sending in "hey can you log in, I need to talk to you asap," I will.

If you want to let me know you've read these, go ahead and like it, but it's not required, I use an honor system anyway.

#Rules #Out of Cake

[77angelnumbers77]

more asks!! 4 and 17 >:3c

Sorry for taking so long to reply!! I got busy 😭

4. What was the last straw that made you finally block that annoying person?

I'm really a block first, ask questions later kind of person to just avoid long-term conflict and to curate my space. I guess on my last account, I did end up blocking some of my mutuals just because I needed a fresh start . . . even if I didn't really use the account after that.

Let's see . . . I'm willing to tolerate basically anything in moderation, short of bigotry and weird thirst stuff. I've blocked a lot of people who show up in my for you page just for posting x reader fanfiction. Not my cup of tea. I know that's weird for someone who spends so much time writing in the second person, but when that second person is supposed to be me that's harder -- and on top of that, I don't particularly want to fuck the Spiderverse guy.

Tags, on the other hand? I blocked dozens of them on my old account. I don't watch much of anything, so I typically block shows and movies when they start trending.

Sometimes a mutual will start posting a bunch of characters from a show/book/whatever that I can't see myself getting into. Sometimes it's just thirst for some particular guy, or really weird discourse that I'm getting on my feed for some reason. Into the tag filter!

I know it's not very tumblr-y of me, but I have different accounts for my different interests because I don't want to subject my mutuals to random guy/gal thirst™️from fandoms they're not in.

I have my first account from a good number of years ago that is effectively dead. I just spammed there. Hardly any original content.

I have my rarepair account which I use to exclusively talk about my favorite pairing from another franchise.

I had a more personal account for essays and such that I've since deleted. Frankly, I've always been a pretty private person, so I tend to keep these accounts to their defined subject and not crosspost. They're not even sideblogs 😭if I got into sideblogs we'd be here all day.

17. There should be more of this type of fic/art

VrisRezi meteorstuck

Sburb/Sgrub never happened AU (one of my favorite tropes because of the potential for angst)

I will always be so into well-done AUs. Worldbuilding is my best friend. I once read this fic with this amazing premise. It was more or less middle ages on Alternia with all sorts of details on how everything worked -- from the trolls and their physiology, to the human servants, to affairs around the castle. It's from an orphan account and the fic never went beyond 5(?) chapters. Every day I think about all the beautifully thought out fics that will never be completed. A well done fantasy AU is a real treat.

Bonus controversial take: in my opinion, we need less Humanstuck AU. It just takes a lot of the joy out for me! I used to be an avid Humanstuck writer myself, actually. I just think it's difficult to translate the trolls into understandable human characters without:

Changing them entirely or

Making them completely unsympathetic

Nothing against Humanstuck, I just think it's more fulfilling to flesh out Alternia.

#asks #rainyamy #txt #ask game #ask meme

[faintprojection]

Darth KOTOR Post Mortem

While they're still being posted, I finished drawing @darthkotorcomic a little over a week ago. While it might not look like it, this was a deceptively challenging project for me and I find myself wanting to talk about it. So... here we go.

The comic was a challenge I set myself because I was finding the experience of a dark side play through of KOTOR 1... unpleasant. But mixed with these odd moments where the game didn't feel like it was reacting appropriately to the things it let your character do. I wanted to see how it worked out, but I needed a reason to push through. Making short comics riffing on the experience ended up being that reason. But there were a few non-obvious obstacles here.

First, color blindness. I've got some moderate red/green color blindness. At the very start I'd planned to stick to black and white to dodge this, but very quickly decided that wasn't going to work. I tried to compensate by using a color picker to get colors from screenshots, but that had its own challenges. I assume there's probably some color weirdness in the result. Not much for it.

The second is I'm one of those people who can't really picture things in their head. Which means I struggle to picture what it is I'm trying to draw. Even trying to draw a character or scene from reference the moment my eyes leave the reference it just tumbles out.

Third, I am both untrained and unpracticed. I've fiddled with programs like GIMP and Inkscape off and on over the years, but I basically haven't tried to draw since I was a teenager, and even back then I wasn't drawing much.

And finally, I have a habit of getting caught in revision loops with anything creative.

With those in mind, here are the strategies I used to get this done.

First, breaking big problems into smaller and smaller problems until a big, unmanageable task became a lot of small manageable tasks. In this case, that meant making drawing characters, drawing scenes, and posing characters in scenes separate problems. There are probably better tools out there, but I knew I could do this with some very basic vector graphics tools so that's what I did. Hence, the character template.

Inkscape doesn't do character skeletons so no arms or legs to fiddle with. Also no mouths or eyebrows. I figured I could do a decent range of expressions by manipulating the hidden rectangle you can see in the color block version, which ended up being mostly true. I never did find a good way to convey an eye roll.

The second thing I had to do was time boxing every task. I didn't use a rigid timer or anything, but if I spent more than a few hours working on any individual character or scene I'd stop, look at what I had so far, and if it at least vaguely looked like the thing I was trying to make I'd stop and move on. I just accepted that this was going to be a bit of a sloppy project. The goal was for a thing to exist, not for that thing to be perfect, or even good.

With that in mind, I also didn't spend much time writing any individual comic. I'd play the game until I had 3ish events pop out at me and spend a little time riffing on those moments before making whatever I'd come up with. Then repeat the cycle.

The last thing was actually sharing the comics here. Making them public forced them to be done. Which helped maintain forward momentum.

The result of all this is... fine. I ended up making 45 comics in 35ish days, heavily weighted towards the end. I don't know that I got much better at drawing in that time, but I did get a lot faster. Some are more amusing than others. Some characters never looked quite right. I need to work on posing (especially eye lines since Player is slightly shorter than everyone else). If I could go back I'd probably find a different way to do the dialog bubbles. And I have mixed feelings on the early choice to have Player and Bastila speak in different fonts than everyone else.

But at the end of the day, goal achieved! A thing exists. I hope it amuses you.

#kotor #star wars #post mortem