#im not homophobic i have gay friends

[pandoratheprocrasticreator]

You know that flavor of ppl who aren't like homophobic by the strictest definition. Like they don't hate queer ppl and are even enthusiastic to co-exist with them but are like. Weird about it. Not in the "I'm fine with queers i just dont want them shoved down my throat" bc thats just homophobia but like the gluten free version of that.

This phenomenon is more harmful irl but im pulling examples from fandom bc thats where i spend most my time online these days and shipping is inconsequential enough to discuss. If a boy and a girl interact at all in one scene theres immediately a whole community for their ship and no one bats an eye. But shippers of gay ships that dont interact are filled with ppl who lord them as their "uwu gay babies" and shippers who are normal about it get plagued with ppl asking them for "proof theyre a couple." And when you do the same for a straight ship ppl retort with "this isnt hurting anyone so leave us alone" which could be a reasonable argument. But the same ppl using that for their straight ships are also the ones asking for cited sources that the author didnt intend for characters in a gay ship to be entirely straight.

Same with other queer headcanons. Trans hcs will have ppl saying that "i PERSONALLY never saw them as trans your headcanon is valid but i need you to give me an essay on your reasons bc WHY WOULD THEY BE TRANS." Ace headcanons are similar except with ppl also telling the hperson with the ace headcanon that they ship this character with someone. And ofc theres the "arent characters allowed to be friends" argument which again. Is valid. But the ppl making that for queer headcanons also often parade screenshots where a boy and girl in a show look at each other and say "this is proof theyre canon."

And maybe its just bc ive been into more queer media lately but these kids of ppl are worse when the media actually has canon queer characters? Ppl flock to the safe and canon gay ships and use that as a shield against accusations of bias. They CANT be homophobic or even biased against queer people because look! They thought it was cute when these two secondary girls held hands! This character has gay dads and this person supports that! They just want you to write an academic paper to justify your ship existing because YOURE the crazy one whos bringing shipping into everything. No one has to reexamine their implicit biases whatsoever. It feels performative.

Ofc this also extends to other biases. The main character of this book is black so the fandom cant be racist. Thats why its perfectly fine for them to hyperfocus on the angsty white boy in the secondary cast and ignore the main poc characters. No one needs to think about why that consistently happens in every fandom like this. This main character is a girl! And shes also a Strong Female Character whos quirky. So we dont need to think about how the fandom lauds around the male villains as sexy and write pages of meta on their motivations and then call female villains "bitches" and talk about the graphic ways they should be killed and maybe sexualize them if theyre conventionally attractive but in a more dehumanizing way than the male villains. And ofc if you call fans out for this, they jump behind the shield of "liking diverse media." Which makes them immune to accusations of bigotry. This is also true for creators of media btw.

Anyway its like. I would rather deal with these kinds of ppl than actual homophobes, especially regarding non fandom topics that actually affect irl ppl. But also these people are so much more annoying than actual homophobes. Bc like. If you tell me you support queer ppl then act like it, you know?

#shut up pandora #dropping this rant in time for pride i guess #homophobia #does that go in this tag? #also dont come at me with fandom drama #the fandom thing is just an example #my point is people will use their support of specific queer ppl #especialy those who fit within heteronormative ideas except they married the same gender or have transitioned #and dismiss all criticism bc they think this keeps them from being homophobic #supporting queer ppl isnt just letting them date of present as the gender they want you also have to change your heteronormative mindset #because otherwise youve just created the same system of oppression but with rainbows #irl this would be the argument #im not homophobic i have gay friends #pride

[fuck-comphet]

Hey mom, if you really wanted your house to be a safe space for me, you wouldn’t invite a known homophobe over while I’m here, and then call me sensitive when I tell you that I’m uncomfortable interacting with this person

#I cannot deal with being in this house much longer #like seriously wtf #this homophobic person is not actually coming over but the only reason is that there’s been too many other friends of my parents over #so their roster was already full #and she just casually mentioned this to me like it was no big deal??? #how can you be comfortable with the idea of inviting a homophobe to your house while your gay daughter is also there?!? #how can you even be friends with that person while you have a gay daughter you say you ‘respect and accept’?!? #im just venting because Im so mad right now #watch she’s going to call ME intolerent for this #like yeah Im INTOLERENT TO HOMOPHOBIA IM LITERALLY GAY???? #cw homophobia #tw homophobia #just fucking reminds me that Im not safe here and I have to constantly be on my toes because my safety is never considered

[punkshitposts]

something I think is actually hilarious is that if you go left enough you start having more stances in common with (individual) conservatives, and if you go right enough you start agreeing with (individual) leftists. like i have a pretty close friend who's self described as "just far enough right that I hate politicians" , whom I hard disagree with his overarching political stances. but the finer details of it... yeah we agree with each other. gun control/gun rights opinions taxation opinions pro-small government opinions slight separatist opinions anti two party opinions anti-corporation opinion ect ect ect.

we stand on opposite sides of a standard political compass but I genuinely think if I were to count stats, I'd agree with as many of his stances as I would a liberals/democrats stances. my hs gov teacher described the difference in right vs left to us as "everyone's goal here is the betterment of mankind, they just think the best ways to do it are different" and that's literally the best way, to me, to describe what the difference in right vs left is regarding anarchism specifically. we got ESSENTIALLY the same opinion but the ways we think are the best ways to go about enacting said opinion are what makes us different. and something abt that is really painfully funny to me. envisioning a world where an-something is the major world thing, not capitalism.... and there's STILL right vs left... but The Anarchist Versions. christ.

sorry for the book i wrote in the tags. ignore typos I am NOT retyping any of that to fix them xoxo

#this is a controversial post to post here ik. however i think can we all agree that echo chambers and bubbles aren't... good. #and i think something that gets forgotten a lot by leftists is that there ARE anarchists on the right #yes we are EXTREMELY different but its important to like. remember that should The revolution come in our lifetimes their still gonna exist #and political disagreement on an individual scale CAN and SHOULD be civil so long as neither party is coming from a bigoted stance. #as in.. no i dont agree with a good chuck of what his stances but by disagree i just think hes wrong abt economics bros not like. a bigot. #in this same vain i also think (myself included) people shouldn't conflate conservativism with racists and homophobes. t #theres proud gay conservatives and conservatives who are poc... erasing those people means we cannot know of how the other side works. #i genuinely believe that if i were to go read every political theory book on right leaning politics id fine something uniquely republican #/right/whatever that i would agree with and then adapt into my own politics. im sure at least one of the unique-to-the-right stances has #actually standing and isn't a load of shit (again probably something economic rather than social). #and thats not a bad thing and if you think it is a actually don't know how to explain it to you! we MUST critically but civilly interact #with political opinions mirroring our own to 1 understand other people 2 fully understand and develope our own stances and why we have em #i genuinely find political conversations with that friend extremely enlightening even if we both walk away still set in unchanged opinions. #because it means i understand WHY others drift to those options but more importantly why /i/ drifted to my own

[unachinrileys]

Isaac McAdoo girlies how does it feel to suffer

#wow i love having to wait a week to find out whether or not my fave is homophobic. thanks jason #like objectively they're not gonna have him be but why do they need to do it like that. im genuinely so annoyed #tune in next week to find out whether or not the character that's constantly shown to be caring + understanding hates his gay best friend! #ted lasso

[italictext]

Hurray!! My sister came out to my mum as bi/pan and told ma she had a girlfriend and it went well! She's not 100% supportive but we'll get there

#My mom actually found out about her girlfriend back in February but didn't tell anyone she knew #And although she knew she still allowed my sister and her “bestie” to hang out and even let my sister's gf sleep in our house lol #Our aunt also knows and she's supportive (which is not surprising because my aunt is a lesbian lol) #Dad doesn't know yet and my sister is not ready to tell him because he's more homophobic than ma #He'll probably be unsupportive in the beginning but will be accepting eventually because his sister is literally a lesbian lmao #And although she's a lesbian dad still loves her because they're siblings and mom and dad even bought my aunt's gf/wife a rainbow cake lol #But they did hide that my aunt and her “best friend” were actually gay from us during our childhood because #“ohh kids won't understand and being gay is inappropriate for kids and we don't want them to turn gay” #So like. Not 100% supportive but at least it's not “GAYS ARE EVIL IM DISOWNING YOU FROM OUR FAMILY NEVER TALK TO ME AGAIN!!!” #Oh right and my mom is bi and she told us it's okay and normal to like the same gender as long as you don't act on it #And talked about having a crush on a girl when she was younger but never doing anything about it because she knows it's a sin #I think my parents are more transphobic than homophobic tbh #I have a trans relative and they interact with her and talk to her but they always misgender her #I don't think I'm going to come out as trans anytime soon #There was this one time they were mocking nonbinary people and they/them pronouns and ouch lol #But yayyy I'm happy for my sister!!

[dysaniadisorder]

i am so sick of all in-community homophobia & transphobia being blamed on teenagers shut the fuck up i was raised by a butch woman do u know the amount of 25-year-olds who have claimed to be elders and told me not to use neos or say the word queer. a lot ok

#the sheer amount of queer teens in shit households. who do not believe they'll live to thirty. #years pass and one thing stays consistent adults are fffucking assholes #like. yeah. even the theater kid who's annoying about the terms twink and bear is still misgendered every minute of every day #like do u know how little we are even encouraged to know... i dont even see ppl having hope for us at this point #somewhere it went from 'queer kids; read queer books!!' #to 'gay babies are all sooo homophobic and they don't even know it' #shut up shut up i hate you. you cannot blame the entire communities problems on someone who's writing an essay on the pearl #shout out to my cw teacher who reccomended me a book; told me the main character was gay in the 1920's and winked at me #triple negative shout out to the 20-smth lesbian who tried making casual conversation w me about how she knows all her bi friends #are either special straight women or lesbians in denial. and i went ahaha. mhm. im gonna go #u guys are losing fucking sight................. anyways #just a rant ignore this

[a-metal-jelly-bean]

oh god oh fuck

#i told a friend about wrightworth (she is very much into romance) #and she asked me 'why do you only watch gay things?' #i told her in the past about killing eve and good omens #so i managed to deflect it by saying that i simply enjoy the story and have watched many series that didnt feature romance #or featured straight romance #shes not homophobic but shes cishet and im NOT out to anyone #and am not in the sutuation where i can safely out myself #i dont know if she bought it or not #its not necessary to be queer to enjoy these shows obv #so i might just be overthinking #but oh god i think i might ha e messed up #i want to die

[cruelsister-moved2]

this is so embarrassing but before i knew i was a lesbian and i was like 11 and i liked like innocent MG fantasy romances and id get really confused like boys are so not like that irl but girls kind of are so how do i get like a boyfriend but whos kind of like a girl + simultaneously would be super obsessed with having a 'best friend' like we will live together and buy each other jewellery and do everything together and be soulmates and she shouldnt like anyone else more than me ever..................................................................closeted lesbianism is honestly so embarrassing-_- and i feel like everyone is more aware of the existence of gay men but so possible to just be a blatantly lesbian child and be like what the hell is wrong with me oh well i guess when i get married to a man ill suddenly become a completely different person and everything will be fine^_^ i didnt even think of any of those things as romantic and at first i had difficulty even connecting those things to the idea of sexuality which had only ever been presented to me in a context which was super unappealing to me (again bc i think people have some lvl of awareness of sex between men but the idea of two women having sex would literally not even cross my mind until i was a teenager and even then i felt super in the dark abt working things out) just that intense loneliness and confusion of feeling so strange but not even understanding WHY + genuinely thinking that theres no one else in the world like you. anyway hilarious in hindsight and i wish all 12 year old confused closeted lesbians knew they can grow up and get girl boyfriend like its real

#actually not possessive like at all as a friend since i realised im gay #it was just because id be like i need to be your specialest friend adn we need to have something no one else has like...ok dyke #and i was like obsessed with morgana from bbc merlin because of her 'outfits' [boobs] #anyway super interesting in odd girls and twilight lovers the ability of people to fully be in a lesbian relationship without ever realisin #theyre lesbians to the point where theyll see (homophobic) stuff about lesbians adn be like oh ew gross! #like. theyre talking about u.. #also i was like yeah i hate kissing i just dont like it ill like it #and then um it turns out i just didnt like kissing feminine women.s orry. it iwll happen again

[onstoryladders]

"mr tilney, a scoundrel????? mr tilney, aN ADVENTURER??????? HE HAS A SISTER!!!!!" mrs allen i don't know how to tell you that's not how it works. like at all

#northanger abbey #also found this in my drafts and chuckled #mrs alleeeeeeeeennnnnnn #its giving im not homophobic i have gay friends

[pandoratheprocrasticreator]

Saw ship art of beast!wirt and belos!hunter. While i dont care about shipping and also bc ppl draw them as hot twinks all the time someone shipping them was a given but. Usually when i see beast!wirt hes portrayed as a depressed teen lost in the woods and gone insane. Is the artist aware that belos!hunter is technically a 400 year old man

#shut up pandora #bad end friends #belos!hunter #beast!wirt #again i dont care what ppl ship and this is not judging the artist #im just wondering if the artist considered that belos is in control in the belos!hunter situation not hunter #i guess angsty boys have to be shipped so ofc edgy hunter would be shipped with edgy wirt #but my dude thats not hunter youre shipping with wirt thats belos a senior citizen #a puritan christian senior citizen #the mere implication of homosexuality will make him explode #like hes gay im pretty sure but hes also been homophobic for 400 years and also he is 400 years old #its very funny to me #anyway that art was very well done and it captures the hot twink ness of the cartoon boys in a very 2015 way #where they look like theyre actually supermodels in their 20s and are also very edgy with smirks doing the dreamworks face #except belos!hunter is there and that wasnt invented in 2015 so it was drawn very recently

[kordbot]

thinkin abt benny tonight

#tags rant approaching lets goooooooooooo #ive been thinking abt his route a lot and his overall place in the story #and i think it would be. REALLY interesting if he got revealed as gay in the sequel #he's already the one who's able to reject toxic masculinity the most !! he's the only one who wants to actually befriend five !!!! #and im not saying that it would be impossible if he was attracted to her but what im saying IS #how Pointless this whole journey in the hopeful must have been to him then !!! #it would also mean that he had to be deep in the closet around his friends due to how affected by toxic masculinity they were which is! sad #im saying this all as an aroace benny believer btw. but a character like him being canonically aroace seems ! kinda unrealistic #but gay benny is real. it's possible. he already gets homophobic comments thrown at him #and im not saying i want him to get called a faggot. hes already a faggot in my heart #like i literally dont care about him liking men i just care about him not liking women #i want this 'searching for The Girl' adventure to feel completely pointless to him at a personal level #but knowing that he can't abandon his friends like that. and pretending that he actually cares about finding her #and for it to become something bigger in the sequel. something beyond personal. like this is not about him anymore #does any of this even make sense #EDIT because i forgot more thoughts i have #first of all sth more personal and less analytic which is: even if he was aroace i dont think he'd have the words for it anyway #and who cares if hes gay or aroace or both hes still queer and not into women #and second thought. it would mean that he didnt have feelings for the red haired girl #which makes. his whole pre flash backstory a lot more interesting #bc she couldn't have been ''leading him on'' #but the whole situation got misinterpreted from the outside. basically #idk man. i like benny i just think he's neat

[krablord]

Jeremy talking about all the great things he can do away from AH and brings up the jokingly being a homophobe thing like

idk i would consider that Bit being the number one reason I click away from streams of his i enjoy and wouldn't. consider that being a good Look At What Funny Things I Can Do stuff.

#im. sad that a lot of Jeremys content and streams are just making uncomfy #i guess i will just switch to other streamers and stuff for a while #IDK i guess it just gives me the highschool dudebros who would say 'i have a gay friend/it was a joke' and got away with bullying #i recognize its my own issue but i guess chat spamming pride emotes while someone says something that makes me dislike myself isn't fun! #idk i think i have fallen out of. many AH/RT folks humour types #rt ah // #:( #i think 'im a homophobe lol' is funnier if youre gay not just like a Big ally.

[bahrmp3]

.

#personal #my brother has been writing online for a couple of years now and recently he started doing commissions #one of the commission has a gay story to it and it always made me go ??? like you someone who is openly homophobic writing for a woman who #specifically asked to include lesbian text as the moving reason for what's happening? and ofc bc I can never keep my mouth shut #today I was like (how are you writing this? for someone who says he doesn't believe /gay/ ppl have a right but not minding their money?) #his answer was (it's not im writing anything explicit...) then he back tracked and was like (ill tell you what dad always says two women #together can't be gay) and when I told him ok but as a homophobe (there is no such thing as homophobia don't fall me that to say homophobia #is like saying you are backwards and an idiot I am neither are you also not []) I feel dumb lmao #what else did I expect? why would I go and ask him that? isn't the answer clear enough? what's even more fucked imo is the commission comes #from one of his online friends? she is paying him 100+ dollars to write this and ok his writing is good but like he must not show her that #side of him and he has been writing so many chapters already it's cheap it's disgusting I shouldn't have said anything #at least from his words he must have forgot me stupidly kind of coming out at some point or is electing to ignore it fuck

[mercurialshigh]

.

#i have failed as an older sister! #my brother is mean and misogynistic and a little gay (like he’s literally had crushes on guys) but also homophobic at the same time #and he smashes things when he gets mad and he’s disrespectful and narcissistic #and i know im not his parent and its not necessarily my responsibility to fix him but #my guy friend was talking about his older sister yesterday and saying how having an older sister shaped the way he thinks and acts now #and he’s a better person bc of her #and it’s just like. i could’ve been that for him but i wasn’t and now maybe that’s why he is the way is #and the guilt is eating me alive from the inside out! #sorry j needed a rant #dl

[surpriserose]

#You know its obvious from her other books that coho has the brand of homophobia where she writes stereotypical gay best friends and #Completely forgets lesbian and bi women exist but to have it this in your face is astounding #Like on top of the misogyny here this is geniunely fucking...homophobic rhetoric that gets directed at lesbian and bi women and i just.... #Sorry i just...im flabbergasted im gobsmacked #Colleen hoover

[vampyrluver]

Sigh. My dad realized that one of my friends is gay (i mean most of my friends r gay they just dont outwardly present as queer to the straight eye but this friend did), nd hes been so weird about it. Hes like trying to tell me i shouldnt be friends with them nd how he automatically didnt like them when he met them nd just....its been rly bumming me out.

#.txt #my dad says he not judgemental but then is the most judgemental person ever #he said he was shocked that id be friends with 'someone like that' #ive been so bummed out about it since he mentioned it bc it makes me rly depressed knowing tht he feels that way #its gotten to the point where he doesnt feel comfy letting me go out nd stuff #i mean he cant do anything abt it im 23 but he sure will make sure to let me kno how hes uncomfy #it also makes me sad bc i know already i have to forever stay in the closet #but i kinda didnt realize how homophobic he was until recently #i at least thought he wpuldnt mind interacting w gay ppl #but unfortunately hes anti interacting w gay ppl #it also sucks bc this means he can never kno the genders nd sexualties of my friends #:( #im sad basically #bc my favorite pass time is being queer #nd hanging w other queer ppl #thats all i do #all day every day #all this nd during pride month too #i rly wanna move out tbh i kinda wanna try nd get government assisted housing #i genuinely feel so uncomfortable here