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#it’s kinda funny tbh LMAO. like I’ve just been so in awe at the sights.
xannerz · 6 months
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It’s been a real fucking stressful week so I’m finally gonna be drunk-watching and reviewing Breaking Dawn Pt. 2. However, I will likely only be slightly drunk(ish) (if at all) because I’m all out of liquor and only have one beer at the moment, but hopefully it’ll be enough to counteract how terrible this movie is lmao. As usual, here is what I remember from the movie the first (and only) time I ever watched it: 
1. The battle scene happened but it was all in Alice’s vision and never actually happened.
2. Imprinting bullshit that none of us want to talk about. Let’s pretend it never happened.
3. Some weird dude makes fake IDs on demand.
4. All the vampires with cool powers get together, yet, sadly, they do not take down the Volturi to form a better, democratic government.
My thoughts as I’m watching are below the break: 
- The opening credits triggered a forgotten feeling of sadness. Was it sadness over a terrible plot or sadness over the series being over? I couldn’t tell you.
- This fucking soundtrack excuse me. The orchestral opening piece? BEAUTIFUL. I want to choreograph a ballet to this. Or do the TikTok twerk challenge to it. Idk. 
- I’m actually kind of sad that this was the last movie and it hasn’t even started yet. Most of the plot is shit and smeyer wrote some horrible garbage, but I want more of this universe. Can some of y’all who are creative write the next book and not be racist or sexist? Thank you.
- Fuck this part of the soundtrack I’m literally going to cry.
- I can’t believe smeyer produced this movie. Who let her? 
- When Bella opens her eyes that shit makes me want to be a vampire @Carlise. 
- Her first instinct is to grab Edward’s arm I’m crying. They love each other so much and it’s so fucking pure. I hate how they look at each other. It makes me sick but it’s all I want.
- This is the most relaxed Edward has been in any of the movies.
- LITERALLY HOW COOL WOULD IT BE TO SEE A FLOWER BLOOM LIKE THAT?!?
- I WANNA JUMP OVER A DAMN WATERFALL
- I actually feel really bad for this deer and I wish they did eat mosquitos :(((((
- Edward’s so proud of her for her control. He loves her so much.
- OMG I FORGOT SHE SAVED THE DEER WE LOVE TO SEE IT SAVE THE  DEER BELLA
- aww fuck no now they’re gonna talk about the imprinting bullshit. I won’t even comment on this because y’all already know my thoughts. We hate it and we hate canon and smeyer is fucked up for what she wrote.
- Carlisle looking fine as fuck as usual, thank you. I don’t love the hairstyle here, but he’s still fire.
- Rosalie looks so happy and we love to see it. She deserves it.
- EMMETT AND ROSALIE ARE INSTIGATING THIS FIGHT AND AS FUCKE UP AS THIS STORYLINE IS I LIVE FOR THEM BOTH AND I LOVE IT LMAO
- THE WAY JACOB SAYS “OH” SENT ME THE FUCK LMAOOOOOO
- Emmett loves this fight and I love Emmett
- Damn Edward’s actually openly being turned on by something for once in his life
- The Loch Ness monster line isn’t that funny anymore tbh. I did not laugh.
- There was a lot of quivering.
- Bella literally said we’re gonna keep going for the rest of eternity. 
- Everyone knows when they get back. So far, Emmett is my favorite in this movie lmao. Even Carlisle who’s always sick of his kids’ shit cracked a smile.
- Poor Charlie. They’re about to tell him she died and they’re all moving.
- Jacob’s about to go tell his secret to Charlie and then shit gets lit. I remember this part now. 
- Taylor deserved an oscar for this scene. This movie might have been trash, but his conversation with Charlie deserved all the awards.
- “Jacob put your on clothes on” fucking SENT ME LMAOOOOO.
- Charlie’s so confused, poor man.
- Jacob straight up invited Charlie over with no warning while Bella was a newborn vampire lmao. 
- I LOVE ESME AND CARLISLE SO MUCH
- The way Carlisle opened the door and said “Hello Charlie” did something to me. I wish my name was Charlie.
- Charlie’s so happy to see Bella though. I’m happy Jake told him tbh. 
- Poor Charlie now he’s all upset because he saw Jacob turn into “a very large dog” and he’s concerned about what this means for Bella.
- She finally called Charlie dad and hugged him like she loved him.
- EDWARD TOLD CHARLIE THE TRUTH THAT RENEMEME WAS THEIR DAUGHTER HOLY SHIT I FORGOT
- Emmett really is my fave in this movie lmaoooo. 
- Everyone is laughing and smiling instead of being all depressed. We lov to see it. This is my favorite scene in any of the movies now. 
- When Bella said she was born to be a vampire, it would’ve been way more effective to start playing “Born to Die” by Lana Del Rey tbh.
- Irina’s about to go tattle-tale to the Volturi. Tbh I’d be pissed too after what those racist fucks did to Laurent. He wanted to join the Cullens and adopt their lifestyle. And by racist fucks, I mean smeyer and the writers of the screenplay.
- Aro is such a dramatic bitch.
- Carlisle could read me the damn phone book and I would listen.
- Honestly smeyer is fucked up the fuck up and I’m starting to think she nejoys writing about children losing their childhood. The immortal children storyline is one of the most fucked up parts of canon and we really need to expose it more. 
- Carlisle and Esme are so damn cute. 
- Uh-oh Sammy boy’s there. Jasper and Alice just bounced? I completely forgot about this.
- The fucking volvo.
- Okay SUPER BIG FUCKING PLOTHOLE HERE. So when they were in Alaska, Edward basically said Renememe had a beating heart so like, wouldn’t the Volturi be able to hear it? Wouldn’t that end the battle before it ever started? Smeyer really just wrote shit without thinking it through lmao.
- We hate to see all the cultural appropriation but we love Rami Malek.
- Senna and Zafrina are STUNNING and the fact that Smeyer wrote them as being anything else is a fucking crime.
- I don’t remember this Garrett hoe but I’ve seen a lot of memes about him so I think he’ll be my second fave in this movie next to Emmett. He’s high key a bitch though for treating people how he did.
- Yeah, I’m with Jacob on this one. The red-eyed bitches don’t need to be killing people. ALSO FUCK SMEYER’S RACIST SHIT AGAIN. MORE WOLVES DUE TO MORE BIOLOGICAL WARFARE THIS IS BULLSHIT SMEYER.
- Garrett really fell in love with this bitch Kate and said idc what you do to me, just do it.
- HOLY SHIT THE NEW WOLVES ARE KIDS KIDS. THEY’RE LIKE 6 OR 7. Y’ALL. WHAT THE EVERLIVING FUCK??? GOING BACK TO WHAT I SAID ABOUT THE IMMORTAL CHILDREN THING. THE POINT STILL STANDS.
- Vladimir and Stefan are EXACTLY the vampires I’ve been waiting on. OVERTHROW THIS MONARCHY OLD ASS SHIT AND FORM THE DEMOCRATIC GOVERNMENT. This scene made me like Carlisle slightly less, but in my headcanon he did want to overthrow the Volturi. I would still stare at him all day and listen to him read the phonebook. But he could’ve been a little more badass. It wouldn’t have hurt.
- Edward actually grew a pair and asked everyone to fight. 
- Is Aro’s hair different in this movie? It looks different and I kinda love it.
- I hate the Volturi and all of them for varying reasons, but I do love Aro’s dramatics.
- Emmett is living for Edward being shocked by Kate which is why, again, he is my fave in this movie lmao.
- Bella reading to Renememe is the sweetest moment in this movie and it deserves more love.
- “Yeah I just do it so much better.” This cocky bastard.
- FINALLY. HE ADMITS HE UNDERESTIMATES HER. THANK YOU HOE. 
- When Jake and Bella are laughing together it makes me smile. It’s so genuine.
- Sue knows what’s good. I can see it in her eyes lmao.
- Alice was smart af though for hiding that clue for Bella. 
- JENKS. That’s the dude’s name that makes the fake IDs.
- “Unusually well-preserved” that’s one way to put it lmao.
- This is so sad. Bella thinks she and Edward will die.
- LOOK AT ALL THOSE BENJIS SHE’S STUFFING INTO BACKPACKS@ BELLA PLEASE PAY OFF MY STUDENT LOAN DEBT 
- Alistair is such a bitch. Why is he even here?
- This little house looks so cozy for Christmas. This is all I want.
- I love the Clearwater family so much and they deserve nothing but our love and respect.
- I FUCKING LOVE GARRETT. “NAME ANY AMERICAN BATTLE I WAS THERE.” LMAOOOOO
- “No one does rebellion like the Irish.” I love this guy too lmao.
- DAMNNNNN 1500 years waiting on revenge?????? They really could’ve overturned the Volturi in favor of a democracy but Carlisle was too damn diplomatic. But he’s still my fave.
- They did Kristen’s eyebrows dirty in this movie.
- Garrett loves Kate so much and it’s so pure. 
- Emmett and Rosalie look so sweet.
- “THE REDCOATS ARE COMING” LMAOOOO I REALLY DO FUCKING LOVE GARRETT AN AWFUL LOT.
- Look @ the Volturi dramatic asses wearing cloaks and shit. Hoe. It’s the 2000s. Not the 1600s. Fix your shit. If a human saw you, you’d expose the secret you’re supposedly trying to keep.
- When Carlisle raised his voice though.
- BUT THIS IS THE BULLSHIT I’M TALKING ABOUT SMEYER PULLING. TALKING ABOUT HOW RENEMEME HAS A BEATING HEART. BITCH. THE VOLTURI WOULD’VE HEARD IT AND KNOWN. NONE OF THIS FUCKERY WAS EVER NECESSARY. SMEYER’S ASS IS MORE DRAMATIC THAN ARO, AND NOT IN A GOOD WAY.
- Bella tried to shield Edward but it wouldn’t stretch all the way to where he was :(((((
- I deadass would not let my child anywhere near Aro period. It would’ve been on sight at this point and the Volturi would’ve been cleared out for democracy.
- I wish Edward would just punch this hoe.
- OH MY GOD I FORGOT ABOUT THE LAUGH THAT IS THE FUNNIEST SHIT
- Jacob seems more concerned than Edward and Bella and that’s really a problem for me. Her parents should’ve torn Aro a new one and that’s on period.
- Bella’s protecting all of them. YAAASSS QUEEN. DEFEAT THESE BTICHES.
- Aro basically verified the headcanon that Gen Z would expose vampires lmaoooo.
- Alice and Jasper save the day.  
- CARLISLE FINALLY SNAPPED YAAAASSSS. BEAT THESE HOES ASSES.
- ESMEEEEEEEEEE
- SAM AND THE BOYS ARE READY TO FUCKIN FIGHT NOW TOO. NO ONE FUCKS WITH CARLISLE.
- This whole fight scene is intense but I already know that none of it really happened and it was all a vision so I’m kind of just tuning it out lmao. 
- Y’all weren’t playing. When they get Seth that shit really does hurt.
- Alright I’m over this. They’re dragging it out. I’m fast-forwarding lmao. 
- YEAH BITCH, BELLA WOULD GET YOUR ASS SO YOU BETTER STOP WHILE YOU CAN.
- OKAY LITERALLY ALSO FUCK THIS STORYLINE NOW I’M PISSED AGAIN I JUST REMEMBERED SMEYER IMPLIED THIS HOE WAS GONNA COME BACK AND FIGHT JACOB FOR RENEMEME WHEN SHE WAS LEGAL IDK IF IT’S IN THE MOVIE IF IT IS Y’ALL FINNA HEAR ABOUT IT AND OF COURSE HE’S INDIGENOUS TOO BECAUSE SMEYER’S GOTTA BE RACIST AS FUCK.
- BUT ANYWAY. Nahuel is actually cool af. Like most of smeyer’s characters, he deserved better.
- Good boy Aro, just walk the fuck away. 
- I really wish Carlisle would’ve just listened to Stefan and Vladimir and kicked the Volturi’s asses. 
- Everyone is so happy and in love. We love to see it. #simpasshoesfandom
- THIS SOUNDTRACK FUCKING SLAPS. THE CLOSING SONG BEFORE THE MEADOW/AT THE BEGINNING OF THE MEADOW IS A JAM.
- Oh fuck here we go with the flashback. I’m gonna cry for sure. It really would’ve been better with Flightless Bird American Mouth though.
- Damn I’m actually crying. #simpasshoesfandom 
- She showed him all her thoughts and love for him I’m crying. 
- “NOBODY’S EVER LOVED ANYBODY AS MUCH AS I’VE EVER LOVED YOUUUUUUU”
- FOREVERRRRR 
- MY HEART
- THE END CREDITSSSSSS
Ummm. So I really thought I would hate this movie. It is mostly problematic as fuck. But some parts of it were good. Like it had funny moments and sad moments and simp moments and it was not awful. Content wise I rate it like a 3/10. Overall rating I give it like an 8/10. If smeyer’s fucked up shit didn’t get in the way of the movie, it could’ve been a 10/10. 
HOW THE PAGES OF THE BOOK OPEN TO REVEAL THE MAIN CHARACTERS’ NAMES I’M CRYING
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marshmallowsims · 7 years
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All for Feyre xo
Thank youuuuuuu :3 
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1. Are looks important in a relationship? “I think in the beginning yeah, cause that’s what you notice first. But from there I don’t think it matters so much” 
2. Are relationships ever worth it? “Yes” 
3. Are you a virgin? “Nope” 
4. Are you in a relationship? “I’m not quite sure on that one yet” 
5. Are you in love? “uhm no.. I don’t think so” 
6. Are you single this year? “Sort of” 
7. Can you commit to one person? “Yeah, its not really a relationship otherwise” 
8. Describe your crush “tall, nice hair, is in a band. Really cute” 
9. Describe your perfect mate “Hey, if they’re not an asshole then they’re pretty damn perfect in my book” 
10. Do you believe in love at first sight? “hmm, kinda 50/50 with that one” 
11. Do you ever want to get married? “Of course!”
12. Do you forgive betrayal? “Never” 
13. Do you get jealous easily? “Nah, it takes a lot to make me jealous”
14. Do you have a crush on anyone? “maybe more than a crush but yeah”
15. Do you have any piercings? “a nose piercing, got my ears pierced too. And I’m getting a belly button piercing soon” 
16. Do you have any tattoos? “a shit ton” 
17. Do you like kissing in public? “Not really. I’m not too fond of that whole pda thing. Kisses fine but no making out” 
20. Do you shower every day? “Yes I do” 
21. Do you think someone has feelings for you? “possibly” 
22. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now? “No clue” 
23. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat? “Yes I can” 
24. Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years? “5 years is a little soon isn’t it?” 
25. Do you want to be in a relationship this year? “Yes I do” 
26. Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you? “yeah...” 
27. Has someone ever written a song or poem for you? “Not yet!” 
28. Have you ever been cheated on? “Yup, it sucks ass” 
29. Have you ever cheated on someone? “Never have. Never will”
30. Have you ever considered plastic surgery? If so, what would you change about your body? “When I was younger I wanted to fix my nose.. but not anymore. I like my body” 
31. Have you ever cried over a guy/girl? “I have” 
32. Have you ever experienced unrequited love? “Yeah” 
33. Have you ever had sex with a man? “YeS” 
34. Have you ever had sex with a woman? “oh yeah” 
35. Have you ever kissed someone older than you? “Everyone I've ever kissed has been older than me, so yup” 
36. Have you ever liked one of your best friends? “No” 
37. Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated? “I believe I have” 
38. Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to? “Yes” 
39. Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have? “Yes” 
40. Have you ever written a song or poem for someone? “Nah, I’m not the best in the compartment” 
41. Have you had sex so far this year? “I have” 
42. How long can you just kiss until your hands start to wander? “Huh, I haven’t really tested that out yet” 
43. How long was your longest relationship? “2 years” 
44. How many boyfriends/girlfriends have you had? “About 4″ 
45. How many people did you kiss in 2011? “I have no idea” 
46. How many times did you have sex last year? “I don’t think I had any tbh” 
47. How old are you? “22” 
48. If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say? “I’d be accepting of that. I mean they like someone else, they like em. Can’t really change that” 
49. If you have a boyfriend/girlfriend, what is your favorite thing about him/her? “Their smile” 
50. If your first true love knocked on your door with apology and presents, would you accept? “fuck no” 
51. Is there a boy/girl who you would do absolutely everything for? “Hmm, I’ll have to come back to this one” 
52. Is there anyone you’ve given up on? Why? “yes, and its a long story” 
53. Is there someone mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are? “I don’t think so?” 
54. Is there someone you will never forget? “Unfortunately, yes” 
55. Share a relationship story. “I don’t really have any good ones, but though when I was 15 I was trying to impress a boy, however he kept walking over to the pond where these scary ass ducks were so I didn’t walk to him until one of them decided to fly out the water and he turned around and ran right into me. So that was pretty funny, we spent the rest of the night talking about ducks and scary stories” 
56. State 8 facts about your body “lots of tattoos, pretty boobs, long fingers, my legs are pretty long too... I can’t think of anything else right now xD” 
57. Things you want to say to an ex “just a big ole fuck you” 
58. What are five ways to win your heart? “make me laugh, pay attention to what I like, go on drives with me, have a good music taste, enjoy cuddling” 
59. What do you look like? (Post a picture!) “brown hair, brown eyes, small button-ish nose...” 
60. What is the biggest age difference between you and any of your partners? “About 5 years” 
61. What is the first thing you notice in someone? “Their hair, I don’t know. I have a obsession with hair” 
62. What is the sexiest thing someone could ever do for/to you? “I have no idea haha” 
63. What is your definition of “having sex”? “Lmao, idk. The same as everyone?” 
64. What is your definition of cheating? “when you start hiding your texts from your partner” 
65. What is your favourite foreplay routine? “I don’t really have a favorite. Its good to mix it up” 
66. What is your favourite roleplay? “never really done that...” 
67. What is your idea of the perfect date? “I’m a sucker for cheesy candlelight dinners” 
68. What is your sexual orientation? “bi-sexual” 
69. What turns you off? “bad smells lol” 
70. What turns you on? “jawlines, like just damn” 
71. What was your kinkiest wet dream? “I’d rather not share that” 
72. What words do you like to hear during sex? “do moans count?” 
73. What’s something sweet you’d like someone to do for you? “Take me to Disney land” 
74. What’s the most superficial characteristic you look for? “confidence? is that superficial...” 
75. What’s the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for you? “made me breakfast in bed and took me to build a bear lol” 
76. What’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever done for someone? “I’m an awful human and have yet to have done something that can be classified as the ‘sweetest’” 
77. What’s your opinion on age differences in relationships? “I don’t see the big deal, unless its more than 6 years... then its strange” 
78. What’s your dirtiest secret? “It wouldn’t be a secret if I shared it now would it?” 
79. When was the last time you felt jealous? Why? “Couple years ago, cause I was immature and thought people were property” 
80. When was the last time you told someone you loved them? “Does my mom count?” 
81. Who are five people you find attractive? “Thats a secret too” 
82. Who is the last person you hugged? “Pity me and the fact that I haven’t hugged anyone in a week”  
83. Who was your first kiss with? “Ah, his name was Rick and I was 13″ 
84. Why did your last relationship fail? “personal reasons” 
85. Would you ever date someone off of the Internet? “Yes” 
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death-noot · 7 years
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Tagged by @sadteriyakigod   i hardly ever do these im just doin it bc u said please in the tags xoxo 
Last:
1. Drink: Mother energy drink  Phone Call: the lady i work with  3. Text: my mum  4. Song: beautifully unconventional by wolf alice i LOVE 5.Last Time I Cried: i honestly dont remember 6. Have you Dated Someone Twice: lmao no 7. Kissed someone and regretted it: nope 8. Been cheated on: no 9. Lost someone special: i’ve only lost pets :c 10. Been depressed: diagnosed when i was like 14 it lit  11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: only once when i was literally drinking tequila out of the bottle that was a rOUGH NIGHT  List 3 Favorite Colors: 
 12. pink 13. yellow 14. light blue 
In the last year, have you… 
15. Made new friends: i like to think so 16. Fallen out of love: havent been in love to fall out of it 17. Laughed until you cried: yes at the stupid messages i send bc im fkin hilarious  18. Found out someone was talking about you: yes, only bc we walked in just as my sister was telling her workmates about how im getting a Shania Twain tattoo 
19. Met someone who changed you: nah 20. Found out who your friends are: always known man 21. Kissed someone on your FB list: nope 22. How many Facebook friends do you know in real life: majority of them 23. Do you have any pets: a dog and two budgies and stephano my goldfish whos always ready to fight 24. Do you want to change your name: nah 25. What did you do for your last birthday: just hung out and got really drunk i think 26. What time did you wake up: like 11:40am 27. What were you doing at midnight last night: stressing about my assesments lmao 28. Name something you can’t wait for: amy shark concert in a few weeks bOIII  29: When was the last time you saw your Mom: like right now 30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: i wish i wasnt so damn awful lol 31. What are you listening to right now: television romance by pale waves i also LOVE 32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: multiple times i know so many toms ??? 33. Something that is getting on your nerves: mONEy 34. Most visited website: my course online forums thingy  35. Mole/s: one under my eyebrow bc the other one i finally got cut off lmao 36. Mark/s: tOO DAMN MANY SON 37. Childhood dream: zookeeper 38. Hair color: naturally a gross blond currently an even grosser grey/blonde with out of control regrowth  39. Long or short hair: Short 40. Do you have a crush on someone?: kind of ?? but its so confusing  41. What do you like about yourself: im funny and i have a really open mind and im super nice  42. Piercings: none 43. Blood Type: this is something people know ?? 44. Nicknames: Laney 45. Relationship status: single 46. Zodiac: scorpio 47. Pronouns: i literally dont care but i most often use she/her 48. Favorite TV show(s): Archer, Rick and Morty, BoJack Horseman 49. Tattoos: i have my dinosaur outline on my ankle, a ufo on my ribs and my shark pal on my arm  50. Right or left hand: right 51. Surgery: only minor day surgery stuff 52. Hair dyed a different color: often lmao  
53. sports: im a slut for soccer nd i also quite enjoy a spot of tennis  54. Vacation: idk wherever people wanna take me 55. Shoes: im literally always wearing vans hi-tops 56. Eating: nothing right now 57. Drinking: still that energy drink 58. I’m about to: keep doing my work lmao 59. Waiting for: my friend to finish work so she can help my dye my hair lol 60. Want: for this girl to not be confusing lol 61. Get married: probably @ australia get it together ffs 62. Career: working towards something in animation or concept art but u know i’d love to be a musician or youtuber or something dumb like that lol WHICH IS BETTER: 
 63. Hugs or Kisses: hugs tbh
64. Lips or eyes: Eyes 65. Shorter or taller: i literally dont care but most girls are shorter than me so 66. Older or Younger: a lil bit older 67. Nice arms or nice stomach: i dont care lmao 68. Sensitive or loud: loud bc it makes up for my quietness lmao 69. Hook up or relationship: relationship tbh 70. Troublemaker or hesitant: idc 
HAVE YOU EVER: 
71. Kissed a stranger: nah 72. Drank hard liquor: probably lmao 73. Lost glasses/contact lenses: nope 74. Turned someone down: yep lmao oops 75. Sex on first date: if ur both into it sure ya 76. Broken someone’s heart: idk 77. Had your heart broken: nah 78. Been arrested: nope 79. Cried when someone died: havent experienced this  80. Fallen for a friend: nah DO YOU BELIEVE IN: 
 81. Yourself: kinda 82. Miracles: not really lol 83. Love at first sight: sure yeah 84. Santa Claus: i mean sure 85. Kiss on the first date: sure OTHER: 
 86. Current best friend: Madi  87. Eye color: blue 88. Favorite movie: Tarzan and labyrinth 
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kiheons · 7 years
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RULES: Complete the survey and say who tagged you in the beginning. When you are finished tag people to do this survey. Have fun and enjoy!
tagged by @minialbum my fav kangaroo fucker <3 i already did this survey but!!!! i shall do it again cause tbh things probably changed
1: ARE YOU NAMED AFTER SOMEONE? nop but me and my brothers all have names that start with r
2: WHEN IS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? last night cause at work theres been a lot of drama and one of my favorite co workers was unfairly fired and im just like really stressed about it and tryna tell my boss to change his mind and its a mess
3: DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? my handwriting isnt awful tbh its getting better cause i write a lot more for class
4: WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? turkey and also tuna if that counts 
5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS?  I dont and tbh idk if I would want them I dont rly like kids
6: IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? nah im terrible
7: DO YOU USE SARCASM? yeh but honestly these days its more like funny comments i guess
8: DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? yah
9: WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? yES its actually a dream of mine to bungee jump at one point
10: WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE KIND OF CEREAL? Im not a huge fan of cereal but its mostly shit like great grains
11: DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? nope i just kick them off and then depending on the shoe untie them if i have to the shoes i usually wear are slip ons so i dont deal with laces often
12: DO YOU THINK YOU’RE A STRONG PERSON?  Idk but i will not hesitate to cut a bitch if necessary
13: WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM FLAVOR? chocolate is always my go to flavor but i like lychee, plum and banana too. and rocky road. i just like chocolate lmao
14: WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? their hair and personal style
15: RED OR PINK? red cause i look weird in pink
16: WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE PHYSICAL THING YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF? i have pretty bad acne and im kinda fat so that also my nose is kinda big and my eyes and two different sizes and my lips are rly thin and my boobs are also different sizes and kinda saggy idk theres a lot i dont like 
17: WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING NOW? no shoes and grey and blue plaid pajama pants
18: WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE? chicken my dad made and salmon from like a few days ago that my dad also made with rice and asparagus
19: WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? vixx - heaven
20: IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? a deep purple or deep blue that appears black at first sight 21: FAVORITE SMELL? t fresh laundry lmao and greasewood and i have this color protecting shampoo that smells like a bangladeshi beauty salon and its really weird but i love that smell cause it kinda reminds me of home
22: WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU SPOKE TO ON THE PHONE? text wise my coworker and official father and gore enthusiast andrew and on call my other coworker nadav aka dont touch my son i’ll fucking cut you
23: FAVORITE SPORT TO WATCH? anything that produces copious amounts of blood and has people going batshit crazy
24: HAIR COLOR? naturally its black my i dyed it a medium brown with golden brown highlights like almost a full year ago lol
26: DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? I have glasses but i dont always need them so i dont bother with contacts
27: FAVORITE FOOD TO EAT? sushi, ice cream, burgers, swedish rockies from my local bakery, cherry hichews, tres leches, krispy kream donuts, mac and cheese from my highschools cafeteria idk i love junk food 28: SCARY MOVIES OR COMEDY? Scary cause i find most comedies to be boring and dry my fav genre is action/thriller tho gimme all the explosion filled superhero movies
29: LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? sasauge party cause its on netflix and i have zero self respect i rly wanna watch moonlight tho but i have a feeling it might like make me cry
30: WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? a shirt i’ve had since i was 11 or 12 its so old its yellow and it has a list of reasons to be a nurse on it its cool
31: SUMMER OR WINTER? depends i like winter cause no bugs and sweaters and chilly enough to not die outside but i like summer cause not cold sun is nice no school
32: HUGS OR KISSES? gimme both
33: WHAT BOOK ARE YOU CURRENTLY READING? still reading moby dick lmaooo
34: WHO DO YOU MISS RIGHT NOW? nadav i really wanna give him a hug
35: WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? no one has mousepads anymore but it would be a hentai mousepad
36: WHAT IS THE LAST TV PROGRAM YOU WATCHED? lockup: maximum security i love prison
37: WHAT IS THE BEST SOUND? rain, that noise when its the middle of the night and my dad is driving to california and its just quiet and so good and only the sound of traffic and also my piggus when they squek
38: ROLLING STONES OR THE BEATLES? they both kinda suck tbh im straight up vixxs ass
39: WHAT IS THE FURTHEST YOU HAVE EVER TRAVELED? bangkok thailand
40: DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? i can vibrate my eyes which is rly weird and not really special but i can and have ripped into my skin before for fun
41: WHERE WERE YOU BORN? raleigh north carolina
42: PEOPLE YOU INVITE TO PARTICIPATE IN THIS SURVEY? because i tagged ppl last time i’ll leave it blank now ^^
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thegeminisage · 7 years
Text
zelda blogging which is so deeply super spoilery, possible the most spoilery it’s ever been, so if you haven’t THOROUGHLY explored the central-north part of the map DON’T read it
aww some of these gerudo wear glasses! love it
i like the music here too but i kinda wish it had been the same melody from oot ; ;
omg riju is tiny!!! is she still young?!
aww her relationship with buliara is sweet they obviously care about each other a lot
AAAAAH THEY'RE TALKING ABOUT MY SWORD lmao maybe i should have gone to get it after all
oh my god a sand seal that gives you words of wisdom for food
ooh i get a free accessory for giving this lady some flint...hmMmMMmMMmmm
topaz i guess bc i'll probs need lightning protection soon? but no, i'm getting a helm...
haha sapphire to go with link's eyes?
ruby bc the flame armor is the ugliest and i wanna wear something else? LOL
went with sapphire iin the end MAY I NOT REGRET IT...
ooooh i shoulda been saving my gems....Dang
i mean, at least i have the 10k i need for the great fairy, but there's so much cool stuff here and i can't bUY ANY...
ah no i did get some opal and amber earrings :3
swim speed up and the ithers are just extra defense
"apparently the accessory maker and the teacher of the relationship class were both in a tragic love triangle, and now they are both single" nintendo this is an all women society please give me lesbians i BEG of you
ok, i need 1 ruby and 5 topaz to finish buying one of everything here. i'll remember
hahahahaha "you've gotta take your time when selecting gems and voe" wise words, lady
omg i found a bar but im too young to drink. nice, nintendo
lmao you can tell one of the ladies you're over 100 and she doesn't believe you dxkfjhg
ok so the hideout of the yiga clan is apparently to the northwest of here so i get to RIDE A SAND SEAL or surf behind one i guess. tbh im a little worried i'll break all my shields :/
i got a gerudo one that i really like!! goes with my scimitar and golden bow!
aww can i not wear accessories along with normal armor...? that sucks
LOL SEAL PUNS the options when talking to the sand seal lady are full of em im dying
wow i can't get this shrine unless i wind sand seal races which i can't do with the divine beast out LOL
jesus those sandstorms look so huge and terrifying...especially since i know they'll disable my map
i wanna explore but tbh i better just stick to the plot and away from those bad boys
oh JESUS i went to an outpost where they're monitoring the beast and it's. so big. and so loud and big and. so scary. oh my god, it's huge
oh FUCK i got too close and it started targeting me so i ran away and thankfully it stopped...definitely gonna take it easy on the exploration if i can help it
oooh no no no why is the air turning green out here...dnw dnw leave me and my map alone!!
uh, and where is my fucking seal...? i left it right HERE
ugh i had trouble mounting the one from before when i stayed in the monitoring outpost do they like leave if you stay gone a long time...? fml
awww this old gerudo never found the lovers pond ):
ugh i see so much stuff i wanna check out but im too scared to get off the seal for long :/ ESPECIALLY if i get stuck in a storm i'll want a way out
oh wow the air is so hot here even my gerudo outfit is useless
tbh, maybe that's a good thing, if i'm eating food i can wear armor with actual defense...much as i love these clothes they're great for getting your ass kicked
ok no seriously WHY does everyone from the yiga clan drop bananas..............
i know that everyone talks about how cool it is that this game just plops you down in the world and lets you figure it out for yourself without hitting you over the head with the instructions
but i just found a bow and some torches in a circle of lit torches with some obviously flammable banners nearby, so
i found the missing gerudo soldier!
"all i've ever seen them do is patrol and eat[in red text] bananas" LMAO WHATS THE DEAL MY DUDES
theres some bananas here on a table wtf do i do throw them at them?? lmao
OMFG LOL IT WORKED
dude pranced right over to it and pocketed it lmao
nooo i missed a chest...maybe i can get it on the way back out ;_;
LOL I FOUND AN ENTIRE ROOM FULL OF BANANAS
this is so funny dkjfgh fck
urgh i wish i could just...snipe them from here. it'd be so EASY
im actually not even totally sure which direction to go, im all turned around
ok, one stationary guy at the door maybe i have to move him?
NOOO I FUCKING FELL THEY SAW ME
i couldn't even fight they one-shotted me and mipha's grace didn't kick in! that isn't fair at all
at least i can get the chest i missed
lol and i cant save in here. perfect.
ok yeah im gonna have to look it up bc as far as i can tell this room has no exit all the hallways just circle back around into it
apparently i CAN fight them...? they're just really hard?
this walkthru is so unclear lol there's a hidden door i can find with magnesis on the right-hand wall WHICH RIGHT...
WAIT fuck i finally see the exit
ah ok. wrong room for the hidden door.
master kohga!! he just...knocked himself out with his own attack. lmao ok
fuck this is SO FUNNY he is so funny
i love it even his bones cracked
isn't what he used to be, apparently
wow this is a boring fight he has a lot of hp and he's so far away the only way i can attack is arrows
and now arrows aren't working anymore...? obviously i'm doing something wrong
maybe i can reflect the rocks back at him
ok google says to drop his things on his head
HAHAHA HIS SPECIAL ATTACK FAILED
this undertale naruto motherfucker im crying i love him
"pretty soon you'll be gone! and not just from my line of sight!" i'm CRYING
fuck the ball rolled on top of him and made him fall
"COWARD! I SHALL BE REMEMBERED!!!"
what a fucking legend i'll never forget you master kohga i promise
aaaand thunder helm retrieved
but i gotta rescue that missing gerudo!
ah good her cell is empty!
lol im skipping sooo many shrines rn...i'll come back to them later i swear
oh NOOOO i got a memory!!!
urbosa the prankster!!! witht he power of lightning at her disposal!! protective of princess zelda!! i'm dying!!!
also im sad so zelda's sealing power mjst be what she used to seal ganon away but apparently in the past she couldn't make it show up for her whole life...?
aw no poor riju the helmet is too big on her
(give it to meeeee)
ok it's time for the divine beast bit but before i do jack or shit im going to upgrade my armor as much as possible rn
ugh you can't enhance the gerudo clothes...geez
FUCK YES HERE WE GO!
aaah riju is talking!!! i always get so surprised!!!
i did it!! tbh i had a really hard time keeping up with her...a dash was too fast but regular speed was too slow
AAH URBOSA IS TALKING TO ME ;_;
ohhh wow it's really walking around while on it
oh man. it's so big. it's so big
oooh you rotate the insides of this one!!
i get the feeling now i should've done more shrines in this area afterall, they have the same sort of electricity theme and they would've been good practice 
okay that was...easily the hardest beast so far
i had to use a guide TWICE and i could barely understand the instructions, PLUS i got two terminals by sheer dumb luck
oooh boy okay a lightning boss im assuming here we gooooo
LMFAO i suck so much at this urbosa was like "there is valor in dodging"
thanks zelda i missed your captain obvious statements
geeeeez i just barely got it
oh EW that never gets any less gross
ohhh my god
"I COULDN'T BE MORE PROUD OF HER" B Y E
oh my gOD?
she mentioned nabooru from oot BY NAME holy SHIT this continutity between games!!!
and "calamity ganon once took on the form of a gerudo that makes this all the more personal" jesus fUCKING christ
i feel so bad for ganondorf the man like
he didn't ask for this shit anymore than link or zelda
and at least they get to win most of the time he always loses and even when he does win he's hated, his win brings ruin
where's the fic where the only way to end the cycle is to become friends with him huh
or like, frankly: the true enemy isn't ganondorf but the evil that takes hold of him
when does he get to be the hero and fight it and smash it to little bitty bits!
oh lord and the blood moon as soon as i get back
do people like, see these towers popping up and beasts moving around? does it scare the shit out of them or make them hopeful?
anyway i hope now i can explore with less sandstorms
oh boy time to ride into a sandstorm gee i sure hope i dont get lost
LOL and first thing i run right into a camp of enemies just bc i was trying to stay in a straight line!!!! jesus
lovely! i am now hopelessly turned around in a sandstorm. i literally don't even know which way i came from
my sand seal is also STUCK lol
ah i passed through it! i'm right where i need to go!
omg I FOUND THE LAST GREAT FAIRY
i'm. i'm 500 short. oh my god
nothing i can't earn with 10 minutes of cooking, tho
huh...? she only asked for 1k...?
i could've SWORN i read someone asks for 10k at one point!
god what if i've been MISINFORMED all this TIME
ooh this one is orange and green
FUCK "i know what you're thinking...can't we just skip to the part where she enhances my clothes?" FUCKING PLAYED
holy FUCK just found my first molduga...i have to KILL one of these for a quest? jesus christ!
ohhh that actually wasn't too bad at all once i figured out the strategy...i've had more trouble with lynels and hinoxes
i'll be honest, the interactive map take a bit of both fun and "work" out of exploring...i look at empty areas and don't wonder "ooh whats over there" but think "ah i can just glance at that bit"
which should make me feel like my Pure Enjoyment of the game is being compromised, and i guess it does a little, but
i wasn't kidding when i said the need to explore was a bit compulsive so it's mostly a relief
ah from up here i see the sandstorm...i think it rotates around the desert? so, it's very possible to avoid and survive even if you do get stuck
anyway i missed several shrines but the quests for them are so complex and i am so Sick
of the desert. even worse than rain tbh
now the question is what to do next: master sword or rito beast
lowkey wanna wait until i get all four beasts before the sword, but
i know you do all four beasts and then ganon and that's it, so if i got the sword then it wouldn't help me for long
plus i'm a little tired of fighting the temperature and changing gear/eating food all the time, so......i guess i'll go check out the forest
maybe i'll see dinaal! i've only seen him once from veeeery very far away
im getting aaaaawfully close to hyrule castle i Dont Like This
lmao every time i catch sight of the divine beasts in the distance, the fact that i can SEE them from THIS far away, blows my fucking mine
they are SO BIG
im getting a much closer look at that flying thing and i'm almost CERTAIN it's a divine beast
just. jesus christ. so BIG
ohhh my gosh i can see the giant pink tree from here *_*
or maybe it's brown, maybe the deku tree is dead lmao
lol straight up skipped the bottomless bog and the enemies at the bottom bc i glided in from death mountain
whoa this tower has rock all over the top??
ah maybe it's so i can't glide to the big tree in the middle lol
not the lost woods if i don't get lost!
lol jk i got on top of it and there was a super cool sword here
aww rauru hillside...im sad
BRO im in the lost woods but its just playing the maze shrine music, i was so hopeful for saria's song
zora's domain having the same music set me up with false expectations t b h
omg if i go too high i die!! i can't follow my higher-ground instict here!!!!!
which is pretty cool but if all i have to do is wander around these woods with my map ON to find the master sword i am gonna be disappointed
even gerudo desert turned it off sometimes
ohhh okay if i wander off the path i also die i can't just go wherever i gotta follow torches i guess
mkay i googled it bc i got stuck and couldn't see anymore torches and it's wind direction! neat
see i feel a little bad about not figuring that out for myself but like...it's not Fun to die over and over bc you can't solve a puzzle. so #realgamers can shut the hell up lol games are for fun
the ember thing is SUPER clever tho and like i know this game is so like, praised bc it stops holding your hand, but i would have appreciated a TINY obscure hint
i did get as far as carrying a torch but i thought maybe i was burning off the fog or smth
omg i found korok forest!!!
oh
there's my sword
said "oh" out loud
kinda wish the quest had been more, idk
but.
mmm not yet. not yet. i'll talk to some koroks first
haha and the very first one tells me to go get the sword all right all right
man. i always remember now that fi's been in there since the ages of skyward sword, sleeping
tbh i kinda miss her 
even though she's way more annoying than navi could ever DREAM of being
for all we complain about compaions, they're a zelda staple and it feels lonely without them
i know not having one makes for a stronger game, i do, but...
really though. the master sword quest was SHOCKINGLY easy. i know i looked up the ember thing but geez it's the first truly disappointing this about this game
and my brother told me they made you work for it lmao but that was. not even close to Work. i've had more trouble at bokoblin camps
like. fucking weak. tbh. i'm so sad like i can't believe this game let me down
OH MY GOD
I TRIED TO TOUCH IT AND THE MEMORIES OVERWHELMED ME
and like at first i was like "ok if link gets his memories back with the sword i'll give them that, that's pretty sick"
AND THEN THE GREAT DEKU TREE STARTED SPEAKING
AND IT WASN'T LOST WOODS MUSIC BUT IT WAS FOREST HAVEN MUSIC
and i straight up burst into tears
"i have watched over hyrule since time immemorial" i know i know i was there i know i missed him so much one of the very first major zelda characters i ever knew i know technically he hasn't been there since the very beginning but he was my beginning
and i didn't even think i cared about him that much emotionally but i also welled up the first time he spoke old hylian in wind waker
oh god link's not WORTHY of the sword yet yes okay i'm here for this i knew this game wouldn't let me down
idk why i never considered the big pink tree might be the deku tree like i joked about it just a few minutes ago but i didn't seriously consider it so i was so surprised
and all the koroks running around and i know i KNOW they used to be kokiri it's almost like i came home, Really Home, the forest was where link began for me, not hyrule proper, he was always a child of these woods
ohhh my god i gotta mop up my face stream is soon!! jesus fuck
oh god now he wants me to pull it again
what if i'm not worthy? what if i am?
i don't have long left to play but i CANNOT leave it here, jesus christ
okay. i'm gonna try. i gotta try. courage!
oh my god it takes your LIFE?
and he said enough when i was down to my last quarter of a heart!! i'm gonna cry i was so close link tried so hard but he wasn't ready yet
i could eat food to max out my hearts but where's the fun in that........
ok. ok. i need to. step back a moment. fuck.
there's hestu! oh my god buddy you finally made it home!! me too pal me too
im gonna save and quit here before i talk to him tho bc like. i gotta stream. but Wow. god Damn
I KNEW THIS GAME WOULDN'T LET ME DOWN!!!!
LMAO I LIED JK im playing a bit more after stream
i talked to the trial korok and "do all the shrines here, it's based on the trials the legendary hero himself did" im crying!!! thats some History!!!
oh my god the koroks are so CUTE??
oh no this is so precious they've been waiting for him
sdfgsfdg "nooo vegetarians everywhere nooo that's my face" i wish i had thought to taka e a snap of that but i cant get him to say it again
aw omg they set up little stores and they only have one of many items please please i'm so proud of them
they set up a little bed for me!! they don't even want my money to sleep there!! i'm sleeping in a tree again, just like i was in oot ;____;
tbh it's so fitting that i did the scary mysterious thing of trying to pull the sword at night and i'm meeting the koroks in the brightness of day
i saw a shield resting on this rock and i had a tiny heart attack like OMG THE HYLIAN SHIELD?!?
ok. ok. i did the trials. i'm gonna see if i can get the sword now??
lol i have the same amt of hearts im not leaving to find a goddess statue and i was trying to boost my stamina anyway but maybe the food boost will help? unless they dont let me use it, we'll see
aaah no it DOESN'T omg
well, maybe one more heart container will do it...?
ugh i don't wanna go back and do the desert ones
me: already fast-traveling
Great, A Sand Storm, Just What I Wanted
fuck i stopped by town and there's a secret club that sells gerudo clothes for men
LOL why.........do they think dudes will feel weird looking pretty? come on
they said there's a high demand so i choose to believe there are lots of gerudo transmen. anyway back to the forest i got two more heart containers i pray it's enough i was SO CLOSE before
I DID IT FUCK I ALMOST DIED BUT I DID IT
IM GONNA CRY JESUS CHRIST
ZELDA SEALED THE SWORD
she's been fighting 100 years and she has so much faith in link
more importantly she heard the sword speak to her im crying fi is in there fi and zelda/hylia meet again
her smile is like the sun, i would do much to feel its warmth upon me again ME TOO PAL im weeping my poor brave daughter i promise i'll save her i promise i promise
it's almost 7am but that was worth it. that was W O R T H I T
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carolrance · 7 years
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I saw this thing. I’m answering this thing... even though nobody asked.
So, I saw someone answering this and thought it was sorta cool but I don’t think people will respond anymore so I’m just doing it myself. Self love, ya know.
Talk about the first ship you ever had. Uhhh… I can’t remember which came first Mulder & Scully or Usagi/Mamoru. (The latter being really icky to me now that I’m older, lol.) I think it was Mulder/Scully… I was in primary school for both of these so it’s confusing cos that was a really long time ago.
Talk about three of the most important ships throughout your life. Mulder/Scully (The X Files). I honestly don’t really feel like “talking” about them cos I don’t think it’s very interesting. Also, I have no idea where to begin. Naomi/Emily (Skins) – I fucking can’t stand them now, to be completely honest. I actually sorta hate Emily. By they (and Skins in general) did have a rather huge impact on my life. Now, I feel like I should put Dany/Doreah but really I think more importantly in terms of my life, it would be Marissa/Alex from The O.C. Does that sound stupid? Maybe. But that pairing (as shitty as they treated Alex and the whole relationship by the end) had a fairly huge influence on me. I think it was my first femslash ship that I was totally open about. (I totally shipped Jo/Rachel (and Jo/Rachel/Paul) from S Club 7 (DON’T EVEN!) but back then I didn’t even think it was serious…even though I had a whole website about it, lmao.)
What’s your current OTP? Oh my… Dany/Doreah forever & Marg/Sansa (ASOIAF/GoT). Michelle/Naomi (Skins). Carol/Helen (Episodes). Amanda Rollins/Olivia Benson (SVU). (With a bit of Rollins/Lindsay on the side. SVU/Chicago PD). Niska/Astrid (Humans). … So… Like… A lot? A lot of old OTPs are still OTPs now? Bo/Lauren (Lost Girl). Meg/Veronica (Veronica Mars). Katniss/Johanna (THG). Lou/Tess (Lip Service). Quinn/Rachel (Unreal). Jessica Jones/Trish Walker (Jessica Jones). Virginia Johnson/Lillian DePaul (Masters of Sex)………I think even my few het ships I’m still not totally over (Chase/Cameron, Mulder/Scully, Martin/Sam, etc) but I mean, I don’t really care either.
What’s your current NOTP? Any of the above characters paired with men. Simple. I have a lot of nOTPs tbh. Most canon ships are NOTPs lmao. Although… I guess Patsy/Delia is a current NOTP of mine. Don’t shoot! I just don’t care for them. They are boring to me.
Do you have any poly ships? I was sorta into Marissa/Alex/Ryan (The O.C.). I started a fic about them. And the aforementioned Jo/Paul/Rachel.
How do you feel about love triangles? Lazy. The thing is, they’re a real thing. I’ve been a bunch and they’re just uncomfortable. No matter what, somebody gets hurt. I just feel like in TV/films they’re SO LAZY. An easy way to create drama for drama’s sake. And one faction of fandom is always upset. And usually they’re really shoddily designed so it’s like one girl, 2 boring ass boys fighting for her WHO WILL SHE CHOOSE?! BLAH……. Boring. “The triangle’s not a friendly shape, okay? It’s pointy. It’s got edges. Triangles hurt people, man.”
How do you feel about RPF? Nope. I’m a bit of a hypocrite cos I spent a great deal of time in my childhood sorta straddling the very thin line here with the whole S Club 7 thing. And, I’ll admit, I did enjoy this April Pearson/Lily Loveless fic once.
Have you ever shipped yourself with a character? No. Usually my favs feel a little too relatable which is why I’m attached to them, not cos I wanna bone them. Also, way too much drama. I mean, fictional characters are almost always exaggerated people.
Do you have many ships that never got together at all? All? LMAO. Okay, let’s see… Sam/Martin did, briefly (Fuck Without A Trace tbh. What a horrid little show.) Chase/Cameron were together and that ended badly as well. Carol/Helen, also ended horribly (so far). Mulder/Scully… that’s difficult. They’re difficult. Marissa/Alex, ended horribly. Naomi/Emily, technically… hmmm. Well, as of S4 they were back together but I didn’t buy it and I pretty much loathed Emily by that point so fuck em. That ended badly too. It ended horribly if you count S7–which I don’t cos I never watched it. If I didn’t see it, it didn’t happen. Bo/Lauren. Okay, this may be the only bright light in all my ships, lmao. They were together and then not, then together, then not, then END GAME. So, I guess the ones that never got together??? Basically just look above at my OTPs and see all the ones I didn’t mention here ending horribly lol.
Do you ship any characters that have never met? ONLY THE BEST ONE: MICHELLE/NAOMI.
Talk about your favorite first kiss. Like in canon onscreen? Or in my head? Big diff. Chase & Cameron maybe. I loved that episode. Mulder & Scully’s first (onscreen) kiss was a bit weird. I don’t remember Sam/Martin tbh. Hmm… Marissa/Alex was hella stilted and awkward prolly cos it was on FOX and like Mischa Barton is a terrible actress. Bo/Lauren’s first kiss was pretty good. Yeah, I really liked that one. Mostly cos it didn’t fade to black immediately (ahem, Carol/Helen) and it wasn’t set to ‘I Kissed A Girl’ (Naomi/Emily)… Okay, in fairness that was only the American version. The one I saw had Lily Allen playing instead… But still. I loved that episode but it wasn’t the best first kiss I’ve ever seen.
Have you ever been disappointed when your ship finally got together? Yes, when they get together only to end even shittier. Which is basically all of them except Bo/Lauren.
Has a ship ever broken your heart? All of them. Canon and otherwise. My heart breaks on a regular basis.
How do you feel about will they/won’t they? Ugh. Useless. Generally, it’s queerbaiting when it’s my femslash OTPs. When it’s het, I’m just like, “As if these two lonely, outrageously attractive co-workers wouldn’t have banged already. Like, give me a break and just do it already. Who believes this shit?”
Have you ever “shipped at first sight”? Lemme think… Probably? I can’t actually recall any specifics however. Not Mulder/Scully, I know that. The first time I saw them, it was New Year’s Eve and I spent the entire show huddled on the sofa in my friend’s basement with her and her cousins, shaking and screaming, lmao. The X-Files really isn’t great TV for easily scared children with big imaginations, lbr.
Talk about a ship you initially disliked. One that I like now that I disliked previously? Erm. None. I don’t flipflop on ships, lbr. It goes like this: I am oblivious/indifferent to ship, depending. I see ship. I ship ship. I love ship. And it’s only then that this can diverge. Either I stay in love forever, or I end up positively hating the show/pairing and I stop shipping it, or it just kinda dies out over time. Normally it’s the first or second, rarely the third.
Talk about a pairing you’ve stopped shipping romantically. And now just ship them only as friends? Or stopped shipping them and dislike them now and don’t want to have anything to do with them? The latter is clearly Sam/Martin. I just hated how the characters were written and the show was fucking awful after S3. The former… Ah, the former. I think this really has to be Naomi/Emily. I am 1457% Naomi/Michelle, no alternatives accepted. Naomily is toxic imo. Like so incredibly nope. I am -100000% Naomily. I stopped shipping them mid-S4, probably during Katie’s episode. I was just like, “Nope, this is pretty gross and not healthy and what the fuck?!” I gave up completely at the finale when it was so fucking stupid. I think by then I’d already had my Michelle/Naomi dream… Anyway. Like, I literally cannot handle Naomi/Emily anymore. At most, I can deal with them as friends. But even then, sometimes I wonder if writing them that way in my fics is pandering in some sense. It’s not intentional pandering to Naomily stans… but, now I look back and wonder? They’re just so awful together romantically. I shudder.
Talk about a moment which made you question an entire ship. Hmmm…. Carol/Helen in Griffith Park in 4x09 when she makes Carol give back her bra. That whole episode was really nasty and really awful and not funny at all. I really dislike the writing there. It was just… Helen was just disgusting really and it made me really uncomfortable about shipping it. I have other examples but it only asked for one.
Have you ever shipped something despite yourself? She-Ra and He-Man. I had no idea they were brother and sister when I was little but I thought they were cute together. Oops. It wasn’t until a few years back when I mentioned them at a party and everyone was like, “Errr, you do know they were twins, yeah?” NO. I DID NOT.
Talk about a ship you feel alone in shipping. Carol/Helen. I feel like the few people that shipped it with me on tumblr here were really turned off by their breakup. And also, it’s been on hiatus forever. Also, I suppose Claire Dearing/Zara Young from Jurassic World, lmao.
Is there a ship you just don’t get, but have nothing against? Most het ones? Like, just… why would you be with that puffy wonderbread boy when you could be with this other hot lady and have 10003x times more chemistry and interestingness? (Like I mean, I’m totally talking about Erin Lindsay and that gay dude she’s fucking, when it would be so much better if she was with Rollins, lmao. You go watch the crossovers episodes and tell me I’m imagining that.) Other het ships, I have definite things against the men.
Which of your ships have the best chemistry? OH GOD. Now, ermmmm…. this depends almost exclusively on my own headcanon/bias so obvs others aren’t likely to agree. Cos, well, Michelle/Naomi have hella chemistry LMAO. Like just look at this photo. Clearly. Okay, seriously… Bo/Lauren. Like hands down, undoubtedly.
Which of your ships deserve better writing? Every single one of them. Especially Dany/Doreah lmao.
Do you mostly ship canon pairings? Clearly not.
Have you ever shipped a pairing before you even started watching the show/movie simply because of gifs and graphics or similar? Skins. Lost Girl. Actually, hmm. I saw gifs of LG but I guess it wasn’t until I saw Zoie Palmer at a film premiere I went to that I was like, “WHO IS THAT?!” And then I realised I had to start watching that programme.
Have you noticed a pattern in your shipping? Is there a romantic dynamic you’re more drawn to? Blonde/Brunette. Like, it’s really obvious. But not 100%. Otherwise, I don’t really see any substantial patterns.
Is there a ship you’ve shipped for most of your life? Mulder/Scully.
Does shipping come easily to you? Neither here nor there. If it clicks, it clicks.
Do you need to ship something to really enjoy a movie/book/tv show/comic? Most of the time. But then sometimes shipping gets in the way of my enjoyment cos it becomes all about the pairing.
Name a couple of fandoms in which you have no ships. Fortitude? Honestly… I don’t even know. I watch a bunch of TV I have no particular interest in shipping anybody. Oh! Here’s one NASHVILLE. I honestly do not care who’s with whom. It’s irrelevant.
Talk about one of your favorite headcanons for a ship you love. Dany/Doreah – Doreah is alive. That’s it. That’s the headcanon. (And bonus, Dany takes Doreah to Lys and burns down the pleasure house Doreah was sold to as a child.) I have to add that most of my fav headcanons revolve around one half of my OTP still being alive. Which is both sad and really telling. (Like… Doreah, Margaery, Naomi, Meg, Marissa, Lillian… Ouch.)
Share five must-read fics. I’m trying really hard not to rec my own shit cos I just love my headcanons too much. Okay, here: They Will Crown You, They Will Take Your Legs by (Netgirl_y2k); tie your handlebars to the stars (and throw away the map) by (majesdane); my heart is gold and my hands are cold by (quinnking); If you’re gonna shoot me down, do it gently by (aphrodite_mine); I Can’t Get Out Of Love (a love i had a grip on; now it’s gripping me) by (doreah) hahahahahahahahaaaa i will do whatever i want when i want to force this pairing on everyone
Name your favorite fanartist(s). IDK??????????
Share your favorite fanmix for your OTP. Dany/Doreah: actually… oops. my fav fanmix for them is on my ipod and nowhere else lmao. it’s really good hahahah. anyway… um. so i’ll choose one that’s not mine: i’ll send a storm (most of mine are either doreah-specific or based on my fic which is a lot of headcanon and this one has excellent musical choices. that first track is killer.) Meg/Veronica: song of solomon (your poetry in motion) Chase/Cameron: i’m all second chances Michelle/Naomi: can’t get out of love Bo/Lauren:  it’s killing me, it’s killing you, a page from the book of my fantasy
Recommend 1-5 shipper blogs. Pass. I don’t even know any…
Do you create fanmixes/gif sets/fanart/fic/fanvids and so on for you ships? Used to. Obvs.
Do you have a favorite trope and/or AU for your OTP? Half of it not being dead.
Do you like and use ship names? I generally stay away from them unless I to find stuff/want people to find my stuff on tumblr. I find them cloying.
Is there a fictional relationship you’d really want for yourself? Hell no. Real life is difficult enough.
If you could change one thing about your OTP, what would that be? They would all be alive. Sensing a pattern? Also, being canon would be nice.
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sleepymarmot · 7 years
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DS9 season 2 liveblog
[Season index: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 PS]
The Homecoming
They're opening the season with a three-parter about Bajoran-Cardassian problems, and Dukat will show up right in the first episode? The writers are not wasting time...
Sisko's unusually cheerful.
Again, I'm amazed at this new heroic O'Brien who is so unlike the background character I've watched press buttons for years.
One does not simply walk into a Cardassian camp! Unless you're these two.
This is completely crazy! What'll stop the Cardassians from destroying their ship?
Just as I was going to say "Why not beam the wounded right from the runabout?", they actually do so -- but just after exiting it. Is there any in-universe reason behind it, or just the ease of fiming?
Why is Dukat being so friendly? Maybe he has spies among the freed Bajorans? If so, it better not be Li Nalas himself...
Bashir you're embarrassing yourself -_-
Quark, why are you always such an ass to your brother? Is that really necessary?
Poor guy.
Oooookay?? The previous scene made me completely trust him, but now my suspicions are stronger than ever. He's replacing Kira? Seriously? That has got to be someone's plan.
Well, this episode was meaty. And it really seems like the show is finding its feet -- unlike Duet, this episode didn't remind me of the other series and feels uniquely DS9.
The Circle
Aw, Odo's being a good friend! I don't remember him ever becoming so agitated before.
Vedek Winn as guest star? *grinds teeth in advance*
what a mess... I don't know if it's funny or sad. What a contrast to Data's friendly, nice and organized goodbye party :D 
"These are my... these are my friends" 
Do the Prophets really need to show her this sexy crap? Also, I'm too faceblind, is the guy in the vision the freedom fighter or the priest?
Odo and Quark!
I don't understand, which of these two is trying to convince the other to support them? And I don't like how blatantly evil they act.
AUGHHHH NOT A STUPID STARFLEET ADMIRAL AND THE PRIME DIRECTIVE!!!!! NO!!!!!!!!! GET THIS CRAP AWAY FROM ME!
(Seriously though, you say "Prime Directive", I hear "stupid bureaucratic crap that gets in the way of doing the obviously right thing". Either retire it or write it better, dammit!)
The Siege
Okay, I might change my mind by the end of the episode, but this might be the strongest of the multi-episode stories so far.
Aww Nog
"The Cardies" haha
Ugh, don't do the "wife asks husband not to be a hero" thing
The freedom fighter becomes a leader for real!
Sisko and Bashir turn and walk away in sync lol
"Is that a spider or a dog?"
Please stop ruining your engaging story with scenes about cartoonish villains...
I've... actually completely forgotten that O'Brien had been in the Cardassian war until this very moment. That's probably why he has been so opinionated, not just because of Picard. 
That's it? Kinda underwhelming.
Ugh, killing Li Nalas? I didn't expect this show to cling so hard to status quo...
The first episode was the most impactful, but the entire story is still very impressive, epic and engaging!
Invasive Procedures
End of previous episode: Everyone happily returns after evacuation! Beginning of this episode: The station has been evacuated
Quark and Odo: *bicker* O'Brien: Ughhhh get a room already
Previous episodes: main characters defeat the forces of the entire Bajor This episode: DS9 is easily hijiacked by a handful of mercs & amateurs
That's an impressive "As you know" speech, Dax
When will poor Jadzia get an episode that's not about her being victimized and quietly accepting death?
Yes, I get it, the entire thing is just a plot device to show us Dax without Jadzia (and hopefully, Jadzia without Dax, if she'll be awake for it?), get on with it please
I hope the second half of the episode is about Dax working against the antagonist literally from the inside
Well, it's pretty disappointing that Dax by themself has so little personality and moral compass. I guess Sisko was all this time really friends with just Curzon and Jadzia, not Dax. Honestly, it's easier to forgive Quark (who sort of redeemed himself with an amusing scene) than Dax after this episode.
I was planning to go to bed after this one, but hell, I need to wash down this nonsense
Cardassians
I see Bashir has gained a lot of confidence since Past Prologue
"I am no more a spy than you are--" "A doctor"
I guess not everyone is fine with strangers touching them haha
"To us, he isn't even one of them any more" uh.....
"They won't hurt you. They're humans, they're not Cardassians" jfc...
"Don't apologize. It's been the high point of my day. DON'T DO IT AGAIN." 
(Sisko seems to chew out Bashir more often than others. Is Bashir just the most undisciplined?)
Oh, here we go, O'Brien's anti-Cardassian racism again, makes sense for it to be in this episode
Poor Keiko, she's trying so hard
Miles is getting over himself! I'm proud of him
Bashir is learning to yell at people! Two episodes in a row now.
Um, Miles, I don't think it's a great idea to tell these things to the boy's father...
Dukat's neck scared me. is that normal
GOD IT'S EVEN WEIRDER FROM THE FRONT why am I so bothered by this lmao. honestly was their casting requirement "not only be able to look ominous without actually doing anything, but to have an extremely long neck so we could sculpt interesting things around it"? i'm sorry i'm gonna shut up about this now
Garak if you hold that satisfied smile for some time more you're going to turn into a child-drawn picture of a sun
I love that Dukat doesn't even bother to finish the conversation, he just turns around and leaves without a word the moment it becomes clear that he lost
Ugh, poor boy... What a choice. Abusive family he loves and considers his own or the planet of strangers from an unfamiliar culture he hates, both claiming to love him and expecting him to identify with them? Even if they didn't tell who took him in the end -- he gets a bad deal either way.
it's much more easier to take Garak seriously when he's not dressed like a grandma who stopped giving a fuck 20 years ago. that's probably why he does dress like this, though... but shouldn't that hurt his reputation as a tailor?
This episode was awesome! Exploration of social issues, family drama, political intrigue -- all tightly wound together and making perfect sense. So far the Cardassian stories are the highlight of the show, I hope it's going to stay this way.
It's really weird how Bashir changed between seasons. He hasn't gotten a lot of screentime apart from this episode, but he seems less naive, awkward and bouncy, he's grown more confident, and the crush on Jadzia has disappeared without a trace. Tbh I'm kind of disappointed -- I was expecting a smoother character arc that would let him grow before our eyes and phase out his immature traits one by one. Same goes for his relationship with Garak -- we've only seen their meeting and now they act like besties, how did they get here?
No, wait, let me get back to the plot of the episode. So Dukat had a politician's child kindapped just in case that politician becomes his opponent at some indefinite point in the future, so that he could go through another complicated scheme to humiliate him? Had he absolutely nothing better to do?!! Did he arrange something like this for everyone who could ever possibly cross him?
Melora
Um, Julian, that sounded a bit too much like Geordi's style of creepy almost-stalking...
Wait, Melora is Grace Holloway? :D I didn't recognize her until the familiar name appeared on screen.
She complains about being treated differently and about following the same rules as everyone else in the same breath. Did the writers make her hypocritical on purpose?
Why is he doing this? Is he actually interested in her as a woman? Does he want to help her acclimatize? Or to put her in her place?
Okay, the low gravity scene is pretty cute even if it doesn't make much sense
Daphne Ashbrook in all your fandoms, kissing all of your pretty Doctors
so far it seems like in season 2 the good episodes are better than in season 1, but the mediocre ones are worse
god, the writing and design are so bad, I don't want to list everything that doesn't make sense to me, let's just move on
Rules of Acquisition
I was tired but the plot twist woke me up!!
Dax is so sweet
Poor Pel :( Shitty Ferengi values win again I guess 
Well, I'm glad he took a stand after all. And that they kissed. HELP I'M HAVING FEELINGS ABOUT FERENGI ROMANCE
Necessary Evil
Aw, Sisko called Rom "a family friend"
...so do Odo and Sisko perform the bad cop-good cop routine often?
yoo a flashback! I was wondering how Dukat was going to fit into this
"Cardassian neck trick" I... think I've already said enough on the subject lol
First meetings!
First meetingS!
I was distracted for some reason and didn't appreciate this episode enough :/ But it was very good!
Second Sight
Yikes Sisko don't embarrass yourself
"She's a married woman" "That would have never stopped Curzon" ew
ah I've missed the starship uniforms
what a boring episode. can we stop with the love interests of the week, please? I don't understand why the writers are suddenly forcing them so hard this season, and watching three of these in one day has turned my brain into soup. okay, Rules of Acquisition worked, but Melora and this episode were terrible!
(only pros: gorgeous woman, gorgeous dress)
Sanctuary
What was even the point of the universal translator not working for a while? This had nothing to do with the story, and the only thing it did was to remind the viewer how implausible the entire concept is.
Second mention of the Dominion -- I guess we'll meet them in the season finale?
Yep, I'd be surprised if the promised land didn't turn out to be Bajor
Bajoran Leia!
Wait, why is famine a problem? Why can't the Federation just provide Bajor with replicators? Prime Directive again? I mean, they almost seem to want me to ask this question by cutting right to refugees in front of a food replicator.
Why are they so attached to the idea it MUST be Bajor? Ugh, I hate these stories.
Rivals
Are you implying that El-Aurians have supernatural abilities and all this time people confided in Guinan not because she's charming and wise but because she mind-controlled them? 
Julian is a NERD and Miles is regretting all of his life choices that led to this point
(Gosh, I didn't realize how much I've missed scenes where the main characters just hang out together off-duty)
8 minutes into the episode and I still have no idea what it's about
Are you saying that O'Brien and Bashir's tennis rivalry is legitimately the B-plot because I'm really into it
"Not in this space-time continuum you won't"
oh my goooood
wait a sec, the listener is only figuring it out NOW?! h o w
finally, a really fun silly episode!
The Alternate
Wait, so when Odo is in humanoid form, does he see and hear like us, or "percieve" like in liquid form? Does he have 360 degree vision?
Put it back! This is either a defense mechanism or the environment needs this column to function for some reason; beam it back down
So Bashir's crush on Dax isn't dead? We haven't seen it for so long, I thought it was over. But why is he monologuing? that's just bad writing.
plot twist! D:
god, this doctor is so creepy with his Measure of the Man reenaction
poor Odo is literally having a meltdown :(
Armageddon Game
Another O'Brien and Bashir episode, nice!
Poor Keiko
Bashir's speech about wife and children at home is weirdly sexist, especially since the previous episode re-established his interest in Dax, and his previous romantic involvement this season was a fellow Stafleet officer too -- he should have the opposite problem (which was already discussed in "Melora")!
aw Quark, you don't have to hide behind the Rules of Acquisition to admit you care
Whispers
Everyone around seemed to be acting like he smells bad, does this mean that's actually true?
"It's not doctors I have a problem with, it's--" "You, Julian"
jfc Miles, she's your wife, you should try to talk at least to her
Quark can't name a rule of acquisition by number? alright, for the first time in the episode I believe someone is fake
O'Brien is a badass
Are they absolutely sure the dead one is the clone and the real one takes his place, not the other way around? That was an awfully convenient excuse to shoot a Starfleet officer point blank without anyone asking questions... 
Poor communication kills. At first it seems like something is wrong with O'Brien, but since people refuse to talk to him about it, he becomes convinced literally everyone else is conspiring against him -- and turns out, no, the problem was with him after all! And then they kill him off for no reason just to maintain status quo and avoid the Thomas Riker situation. They could have told him at literally any point instead of being so stupidly vague, but no, gotta keep the plot moving for 45 minutes! Before they found the real O'Brien they could have arrested the clone and told him everything, I'm sure O'Brien would understand; and after they rescued the real one, they could have just transmitted the image, if they're so averse to words. And after acting so stupid, as a final insult the other characters keep talking over their poor dying friend in third person like complete jerks. The episode is great... until that ending. Which just doubles my frustration, because it's one thing when a story is mediocre to begin with, but it really sucks when a wonderful episode is ruined by shitty conclusion.
Paradise
Yes, yes, I get it, this woman would do anything to keep this way of life and probably sabotaged the technology in the first place
What's wrong with replicated food? I hate this stupid trope
did she send the runabout away too?
what the FUCK
look, it might be useful social commentary to depict these rhetoric and tactics, but watching it is still torturous
it adds another level of creepiness that all this shit is done to a black protagonist -- was it intentional?
she's a more proficient torturer than the guy from Chain of Command
this woman is one of the most horrifying antagonists in all Star Trek. she actually believes all this shit
the engineer is supporting her? they all want to stay? for fuck's sake. she made them all see five lights
well. if the writers wanted to upset me, they succeeded
Shadowplay
"How fascinating" :D
"Women don't react to me in that manner" What about Lwaxana, then?
"After seven lifetimes, the impersonal questions aren't much fun anymore"
Yeah, why does a 15 year old need a job?!
The local guy is surprised at Odo beaming up and back down, like he's never seen anything like this before, and two minutes later says he has scanned for transporter activity
I like how the Prime Directive isn't even mentioned :D Or is it a human colony? But isn't this the Gamma Quadrant?
"You want me to spy on Quark for you?" so excited, bless him :D
backstory for that one time Miles played cello on TNG!
I'm glad these villagers are not as conservative and stubborn as people from the previous episode
I am reminded how much more modern DS9's storytelling is than TNG's every time they namedrop the Dominion -- like Doctor Who did ten years later with Bad Wolf, Torchwood etc
I knew he'd transform for the little girl eventually :') Odo reminded me of Data more than usual this time because of the friendship with a child and the episode's general similarity to Thine Own Self. But while Data gets along with kids partially thanks to his own childish (in a good way) qualities, Odo is more like a grumpy but caring grandpa -- I'd even say there's some First Doctor vibe. 
(I'm a bit disappointed the episode didn't follow up on that promise of "Bashir practicing his purely theoretical spying skillz on Quark for Kira", because that sounds absolutely hilarious)
Playing God
Fun-loving cool senpai Jadzia is amazing
Interesting that Jadzia doesn't identify with Curzon at all in this case, despite presumably remembering their interaction from his point of view too
I didn't really understand how they solved the problem but I don't care
This is my favourite Jadzia episode so far. She finally got to show agency, have some fun, show off her professional skills, and explore her own identity (instead of standing around silently while other people explore it). And I love how other characters' scenes are vivid despite shortness: Quark playing tongo with Jadzia and giving well-intentioned if unhelpful advice to the initiate; Bashir's friendship with Jadzia and O'Brien; O'Brien calling across the border about his pest problem; Odo, Kira and Sisko's different approaches to the ethical dilemma.
Profit and Loss
Yesss! Cardassians!
Ooh Quark has romantic history with the pretty Cardassian woman?! This is getting better and better
A scene between Garak and Quark! is it my birthday?
"Personally, I find this style to be a bit too radical. But your friend seems the sort who appreciates that kind of thing" Does he know everything and everyone?! Though come to think of it, this shouldn't have surprised me at all -- even regardless of special channels Garak may use, these dissidents might be well-known to the point that their info is freely available on something like stateenemies.gov.car/wanted
I love how he casually rips an expensive dress to make his point
Passionate lover Quark is so strange to see
Odo's good at playing hard to get
lmao I've waited so long for someone to finally to hug Odo and... :D I do also love his relationship with Quark but I never expected these two things to intersect :D
so, did Garak change his mind on the fly or was he just stalling until that guy comes and can be disposed of?
alright, I amend my previous statement about one-episode love interests: Quark is allowed to have them, if all women who fall for him continue to be this awesome
Blood Oath
What, the holosuites have no sound isolation?! If so, who would ever use them for anything more... private than a recreation of a famous battle?
These Klingons have strange hair
It's so nice to see a young, human-looking woman as an equal to three old Klingons
ah bat'leth fighting, I didn't realize how I've missed it
-- and that young, human-looking woman is more of an old-fashioned honorable Klingon than the rest of them
what an outfit
I'm glad the Klingon interpreted her hesitation so favorably
*reads TVTropes* Wait, all these three are from TOS?! Damn... I could barely tell them apart. I really liked the episode, but turns out I didn't appreciate it nearly enough. Time for a little TOS rewatch?
The Maquis 1
What does the word Nor mean? Terok Nor, Bok'Nor...
The Vulcan woman looks great; nice dress.
"Jake-o" aww
Do Cardassians have a thing for showing up right in your quarters unexpectedly?
"We'll need one of your runabouts" "Where are we going?" Nice one, Sisko
"So you turn off my controls so I don't have enough light to take my photograph?" :D  
"Education is power. Joy is vulnerability" Dukat is being very quotable today?
"Of all the humans I've met you strike me as the most joyless and the least vulnerable" "I am when I'm with you"
Honestly it's as if they are writing Sisko and Dukat's interactions for me personally
I like how the Vulcan is taking Quark's courtship at face value
Wait, is Gul Evek that reasonable guy from Journey's End?
I'm starting to understand Preemptive Strike better -- so it all took place in the demilitarized zone? That makes sense. (How did I miss that?)
"I was looking forward to showing you more ways to mix business with pleasure" "Perhaps in the future. I do find you... intriguing, Quark" im screaming hooly shit I'd never have guessed that Quark of all people would be the chick magnet #1 on this station?? how did he manage to meet a woman this line would actually work on
good shit good shit
The Maquis 2
Sisko gives a show-defining speech!
"Vulcans are a species that appreciate good ears"
something tells me Dukat wasn't the one supplying weapons and the Central Command is trying to kill two birds with one stone -- oh look, this lie was so obvious that for once the characters saw through it right away too
"The Central Command wants him dead. That's reason enough for us to want him alive"
Interesting, Dukat suddenly started acting in a theatrical manner I've only seen in Garak before. Some Cardassian cultural thing?
Haha, I didn't even realize where Sisko was leading the conversation! He's excellent in this story
"With that kind of firepower, the Bajorans could have launched a full-scale assault on Cardassia" "And lost"
Damn, Dukat really has his Intimidate skill maxed out! Sisko fails the Paragon check, Dukat passes the Renegade check.
Finally we see someone explain to a Vulcan why they're being illogical instead of making some bullshit reference to emotion. I love you Quark
the only bad thing about this two-parter is that it kinda made me like the Totalitarian Lizard Man a bit too much??? how dare you. let me go back to my wholesome crushes on Bashir and Jadzia before I start stanning or something
oh, and also I hoped this episode would make the Maquis more sympathetic so I could feel better about Ro Laren leaving Stafleet for them... nnnot much.
The Wire
What a great episode!! I wasn't liveblogging at all because it was too intense. I don't even feel the need to comment on drama or character development -- the story and acting speak for themselves.
Alright, how the hell did Bashir reach Tain? How does one get the home address of the former head of secret service of a foreign empire?! And how did Bashir manage to convince Sisko to authorize this stunt and give him the runabout -- or did he steal it?
The "Elim" reveal isn't really a surprise after you've spent some time near a fandom where people tag characters by full name... 
What interests me now: is Garak going to act differently now that he's not keeping himself drugged? Will he go through withdrawal? In the final scene he pretends everything is Back To Normal, but... Or was the table-flipping scene the extent of his withdrawal symptoms?
Another disjointed thought: this is a wonderful example of a satisfying hurt/comfort story 
Star Trek has some amazingly intense dramas for two actors. The Most Toys, Chain of Command, Duet... This one is different because in order to bring the two characters together and at the same time isolate them from the rest of the world, instead of captivity it uses doctor-patient relationship. Oh, another story from a different fandom it reminds me of, now that I think of it: Scherzo.
Crossover
Lmao it's nice that even after leveling up at unstoppable determination and compassionate badassery in the previous episode, Bashir still can be a ridiculous dork 
...though it is pretty jarring that right after a high drama where he shows his capacity for patience and caring, and greatly deepens his relationship with someone, the next episode opens with the awkwardest attempt at befriending (and flirting?)
I didn't expect Garak to appear in two episodes in a row!
Why is Mirror Kira walking like this...
I started laughing at "I don't have a designation, sir" because my mind immediately went to "There's no need to call me sir, professor"
Female Cardassian guard! And Kira called herself attractive, heh.
Mirror Quark is dressed so poorly...
Okay, Mirror Kira definitely wants to fuck herself -- wait, that's actually canon? Do all evil Kiras hit on women? I wish they'd let our Kira do that too. I know it was written in the nineties, but I really don't appreciate the "evil=bi" trope
Well this was pretty weak. The only mirror character who works well, i.e. exposes the real character's darker side, is Odo. Kira looks just weak and hysterical. (Remember how I complained about her acting in the pilot?) Mirror Garak is actually less intimidating than our Garak.
The Collaborator
Can't say I'm very excited to see Vedek Bareil again. I liked him in his first episode for ideological reasons, but this romance...
Oh no, the Sydney Opera Hat is on the Promenade again? Is she planning another assassination?
"Welcome back. You're under arrest"
The episode was not engaging to watch, but I enjoyed the Grey Morality (tm).
Tribunal
These Cardassians have lost all shame, what do they think they're doing
Evek again, and I think another familiar face?
Yiiikes
Here comes the good cop
I'm glad they're not spending an entire episode on a Chain of Command remake. 
Not telling the accused what they're charged with: a deliberate ploy to mess with their mind, or do the Cardassians not even bother to think about these things anymore?
Huh, Odo had a Cardassian rank that's still valid? That's useful.
Alright, but wasn't O'Brien still declared guilty? So the scheme to discredit the Federation worked?
Also, a missing molar isn't good evidence. Maybe it means that man was just captured and processed by the Cardassians, like O'Brien. And why would a spy alter his appearance but forget about this? You'd think humans and Cardassians have different enough teeth that he'd have to get dental implants anyway. 
I found one good thing about the Cardassian "court"! The judge has fabulous hair.
The Jem'Hadar
Jake!
"I bet we'll have a great time!" "I know we will" Please don't say things like this in the opening scene of a season finale...
Aw poor Sisko :D
"Guess" "He said yes" "Guess again"
Aw Quark needs a hug
Aww kids
Aww Odo cares about Quark
"If the Dominion comes through the wormhole, the first battle will be fought here, and I intend to be ready for them." Well. That's a chilling line to end the season on.
As much as I like it when the Federation arrogance is called out, Quark's speech just doesn't work. "The way I see it, humans used to be a lot like Ferengi. Greedy, acquisitive, interested only in profit. We're a constant reminder of a part of your past you'd like to forget." Well, yeah! That was basically the original concept for their species! "Humans used to be a lot worse than the Ferengi" -- so what? 24th century humans are disgusted by the atrocities of their ancestors, so why can't they also be disgusted by the exact same things perpetuated by their contemporaries? Domestic abuse and sexism are wrong, no matter who does it. Note how this entire speech sidesteps the violent misogyny, aka the Ferengi's most obvious appaling trait. This is like saying "Don't judge the Cardassian state for being totalitarian! That's just their culture, you don't understand!"
General impressions
Bashir and Jadzia finally got some character development!
I live for Cardassian episodes. It's fascinating to see a dystopia in the universe that started as a utopia, and see how characters from both sides deal with each other. 
(Random thought: I want an AU episode like "Crossover" where another universe/timeline's Cardassia is a free state, and for a Cardassian viewpoint character our world is a nightmare scenario just like the Mirror Universe is for our heroes.)
I don't loathe Winn as much as I did in the first season finale. That makes her kind of underwhelming as a recurring antagonist. On the other hand, that might be a good thing, because getting so angry repeatedly couldn't have been good for my health. But because they're represented mainly by the hateful-but-not-enough Winn and the bland Bareil, the Bajoran affairs are usually not as gripping as the Cardassian. I hope to see more of their secular politics next season.
First season was very even; second has two irredeemably clumsy stories (Melora and Second Sight), but a growing number of outstanding ones, too. 
First season was already an improvement over TNG in terms of serialization, and this one is better. Both multi-part stories are brilliant, too. I hope this trend continues. 
A noticeable weakness in the first season was the mundanity of the Gamma Quadrant. No sense of wonder, no noticeably stranger aliens. The introduction of the Dominion and their overwhelming threat partially rectified that problem, bringing back some of the feeling from "Q Who". Yes, setting foot in a far corner of the galaxy should be awesome in both senses of the word, and lead the previously unimaginable dangers right back to your home.
The costume design has visibly improved in this season!
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