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saltymongoose · 1 year

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AHH OK CAN YOU PLEASE MAKE YAN JORGE AND CHURCH HCS?

Yes, I can and I shall. Enjoy! ;)

General Yan!Church and Yan!Jorge Headcanons

(TW: Yandere, Obsessive Behavior, Violence, mentions of blood.)

> Church and Jorge are not the types to be hidden in their affections at all. Once they start feeling strong affection for you, it’s obvious to everyone in the vicinity, which is of course how they found out about each other’s “thing” for you. Jorge couldn’t ignore how Church insisted that you were the only one besides himself who could handle his gear or tune his weapons, and similarly, Jorge’s own increasingly affectionate treatment of you was hardly subtle. Even when they started to become a bit more intense in their actions, the heightened focus on showing you their love was mirrored between the two.

> To everyone’s surprise, this just became another thing for them to sort of bond with each other over, instead of causing the infighting they assumed. In the G03LM’s minds, it made total sense; of course the other would love you, not loving you was just plain stupid. Plus, they operate on the same wavelength most of the time anyway, so their bro liking the same person is fine with them. There’s no one else Church or Jorge would rather share you with, and as it happens, this is what really eggs them on to make you know just how much they both care for you.

> Neither are really the type to do typical romantic gestures like give you flowers they picked or write soliloquies to describe your beauty, but they do flirt with you a lot. You’d swear that “good lookin’” was practically another name for you now with how often Jorge purrs it to you in a greeting, and then there was the rare “sweetcheeks” from Church. They aren’t exactly the most flowery terms of endearment, but then again, neither of them seemed the type to do that to begin with, so you were still surprised.

> In fact, they call you those so often that they almost caught on with other grunts as well. But attempts to make those nicknames a regular thing were quickly stopped by none other than Church and Jorge themselves; it was their thing with you, and only theirs.

> (Jorge paused from cleaning his gun when he heard one of the other technicians call out to you with his name for you. He leaned down to them and grinned behind his mask when they shrank back a bit. “Hah, that’s real funny pal. But if you call them that again I’ll crush you.” Point taken.)

> Jorge also lavishes you with praise and compliments constantly, for the most simple of actions and when you least expect it. He’s particularly fond of this way of showing affection to you, and he considers it his mission to make you know how much he loves everything about you. Everything from the way your brows furrow when you’re confused to innocuous things like the precise way you prefer your coffee and the way you look so focused when working. Although sometimes his comments can be weirdly specific. For someone who you assumed didn’t know that much about you, the fact he can list off certain more intimate things he knows about you so offhandedly is a bit unnerving.

> (It’s just because he spends a lot of time looking at you, but you didn’t know the true depth of it. It was easy to keep it secret, with how hidden his gaze is behind his mask.)

> For the record, Church also compliments you, but they’re typically shorter and more blunt. He’ll just state that you’re really pretty as though it’s a universally known fact, which it is in his mind. He’ll also fight anyone who says otherwise, but he’s always itching for a chance to pummel someone on your behalf, so it’s something you’re kind of used to now. It’s weirdly flattering regardless, but you try not to encourage it too much.

> Jorge and Church also give you presents frequently as well; usually weapons and other trinkets as “battle trophies” from grunts they faced in combat, oftentimes still bloody. You’re grossed out a bit by just how much gore they track into the building whenever they find something new to gift you, but seeing them perk up proudly whenever you thank them for it makes up for it. They seem so happy whenever you show an ounce of gratitude for their presents, punching the air and fist-bumping each other when you simply smile at them while holding whatever they gave you. You might even say it’s cute, although using such an adjective for the violent mercs seems a tad inappropriate.

> (Half of the time you’re not even sure what to do with the things they bring you, but now you have an entire wall full of weapons and armor pieces from them. It’d be useful if you ever need to get into a fight, but you’re just a technician.)

> (Of course, you don’t know how many of those special things are from people who were once threats and were foolish enough to pose a threat to your relationship with them. They really should’ve known better, it’s not like Church or Jorge had tried to hide what you were to them. Hopefully the rest of your coworkers would take a hint from the red they tracked in, and the missing presence of some of the people you shared a shift with.)

> They drop any and every conversation they have just to make you a part of it once you enter the room, including important mission briefings from Sheriff. (Oh well. He just has to get that you’re more important.) You’ll also find yourself physically close to them more often than not; it’s common for you to have to try to ignore how they crowd in on your space whenever they catch sight of you. It’s not like you work with them often - you’re not exactly a mercenary or field worker - so when they decide to spend virtually all of their downtime around you, it’s very noticeable.

> They’re also quite touchy with you; you’re going to be picked up by one of them and bear-hugged at least once every day, and luckily they are very gentle with you, so you never have to worry about being harmed by their armor or squeezed too tight. They’d rather die than hurt you, so their grip on you is always soft, and when they nudge against you with their masked face (their version of a kind of kiss, unbeknownst to you), it isn’t hard enough to cause any damage. If they had it their way, you’d always be in their arms, and they even try to take turns with it just to be fair.

> (As an additional bonus, if you’re snuggled up in Church or Jorge’s embrace, no one bothers them and tries to get you away. It's the perfect way to keep you all to themselves, and their loud purring shows just how pleased they are about this.)

> Church is definitely the quieter of the two, but also the one more likely to rough someone up if they affront you in some way. The other members of MERC know better than to get too close to you now, since attempts to be all buddy-buddy with you (or god forbid, flirt with you) were shut down by the mohawked G03LM’s fists. Literally.

> (With how often Church was around you, he got pretty good at reading you. So when he heard you laugh uncomfortably and snapped his attention to you to find one of the other grunts leaning way too close to you for even your taste, he was quick to get rid of the problem. It’s the least he could do, for someone he adores so much.)

> You’ve had a talk with Church about, well, massacring your coworkers whenever you happened to take an off day (at least he’s polite enough not to do it in front of you), so he’s not likely to hurt them too badly now. But it just so happens that Church also knows that you can cause a lot of damage that doesn’t lead to death all the time, which some might even consider worse.

> (Sheriff is now more concerned than ever about healthcare costs for MERC. Perhaps he can cut another deal with the Nexus Core?)

> Jorge is more the type to just threaten the other mercenaries, but he isn’t above getting physical along with Church to break a few (many) bones if he thinks the situation calls for it. Which happens more often than not, if you’re not in their vicinity.

> (They’d honestly be offended if you thought they’d forget the way that prick Sheriff just hired was giving you googly eyes. The little twerp just has to learn his place, and as your partners, there’s no one better to teach them.)

> Despite how they will deliberately target the others in your faction when they know you won’t be around, they still want to show off around you. There’s always an open invitation for you to observe their training, and Jorge is always quick to remind you of this. When you do watch them fight, they naturally put a lot more effort into fighting. They already love the thrill of it, but feeling your eyes on them just invigorates them like nothing else.

> If it weren’t for the fact that the two are so dangerous, the fact that you have them completely wrapped around your finger without knowing it would be funny to everyone else. Anything you even mention once will be noted by them, and while they might not be the most efficient at fetching it/completing some task you need finished, they’ll find some way to fulfill your wishes. Even if it means threatening asking someone else to do it for them, or going to the very ends of Nexus City and fighting through hoards of random bandits and zeds to bring back a single tool you’d simply like to have someday, they’ll do it happily. And of course, they’ll be chatting with each other the entire time about how cute you are, and how they can’t wait to see the look on your face when you realize what they’ve done for you.

> Both of them routinely refer to you as their partner, and they mean it in every sense of the word. Ever since they fell for you so hard, there’s no one else Church and Jorge would be willing to go to for tune-ups and other jobs that needed more technical expertise present. But they also mean it in the romantic sense as well. In their eyes, they’d already made it explicitly clear to everyone else that you were together. They just need to go a step further to get you to acknowledge it as well. Plus, you’d never outright rejected their advances before, so they just know you return their affections. Maybe you’re just shy about it compared to them.

> It doesn't matter to them how long it takes you to understand and eventually officially requite what they feel because Church and Jorge are willing to work at this for however long is needed. They're not going to quit when they know they're so close to having you completely and being able to show you all of their love to its truest extent. Besides, they're G03LMs; Church and Jorge can be brought back from whatever form of the afterlife Nevada has for as long as needed. If they can fight off death itself, then no one stands a chance at taking you from them, so your being with them is completely inevitable. That's all there is to it.

#tw: yandere #tw: violence #they are actually surprisingly tame for yanderes tbh #my writing #yandere madness combat #yandere madcom #yandere church #yandere jorge #church x reader #jorge x reader #madness combat x reader

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goosedoes-fics · 6 months

Text

Madness Headcanons

Madcom x Reader

Content Warnings: I talk about tits a lot sorry. Also mentions of organ failure and transfem Tricky

Notes: Trying to get back into the writing groove. Sorry if this is shit

HANK J WIMBLETON

If you didn't know ASL before meeting them, they would communicate primarily with hand and head movements. He's too cool to use a notepad

Not a big fan of PDA, but in private he's quite affectionate and cuddly. theyre just a big ass guard dog cmon

Hank Motherfucker Wimbleton what are you doing here????? waiting for them to play gangnam styl.

DEIMOS

Transgenda

I like to imagine Dedmos's rock face works similarly to Hank's metal jaw. It's just a rock jaw. Rock lobster.

He is an ASSHOLE (affectionate)

The kind of person to like. Punch your shoulder when they laugh

Their ideal first date is stealing the declaration of independence

If you don't make him, he will go days without showering he is SO smelly anfd SO stinky. He has GREASY ASS HAIR i just know it

SANFORD

If Hank is a guard dog he's one of those goofy dogs that look like bear cubs

VERY big fan of PDA he will smooch you anywhere. everywhere. any time any place any day

He takes missions more seriously than Deimos but outside of missions he is just a big fat goofball

I'm going to place my hands directly on his man tits. anyways where was I

He lost his nipples in The War

I'm kidding. He lost them during top surgery.

At this point i'm aiming the transgenderification beam at all of them. nobody is safe. BE TRANSGENDER

DOC

Sometimes he wears his hair down and it's like a mullet w/ shaved sides

Out of all of them he's the most adverse to PDA but! In private he is very sweet. very silly

Hey are you okay with being tested on? Yeah? Cool will you drink this organ failure potion I brewed

Plays the piano sometimes! He might serenade you if you ask nicely

TRICKY

BE TRANSGENDER. (shoots her with my transfem beam)

Yeah so he/she bigender Tricky is real. Krinkels told me himself

He is like a big weird dog as well. He might lick your face (don't let him zed spit is slightly acidic)

Probably likes PDA the most. She will make out with you very grossly and sloppily in the middle of McDonalds

Very soft very fluffy. Which is surprising considering how many times he's died

His tail is somewhat prehensile, he could dangle from a tree branch if he tried hard enough

CHURCH AND JORGE

They are very good at sharing!

Sorry not sorry yandere enjoyers but they would NOT kill someone for looking at you they would be like haha yeah everyone should look at our awesome fucking partner theyre so cool and hot

Sometimes they forget how big they are compared to you so they might try to like flop over on you. Pigpile on the small one

Very prone to roughhousing and play fighting but they'll be gentle if you ask

BEEFY BOYS 😍

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nevadas-night-time-novelist · 3 months

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So I’ve read your madcom x reader where reader gets knocked up and I can’t find it anymore. Do you have a link?

Multiple links Anon friend :)

Main 4

Jeb/Sher/Audi/Tricky

Church+Jorge/Phobos

Crackpot/Hoffy

TorturexFemMAG

#anon #x.txt

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rotshop · 3 years

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Maybe some more cold and sleeby employer Reader? [Ship is up to you]

y'all ready for this curveball .

-while it's not an explicit one, there is some sort of internal-hierarchy within the population of employers. you're a higher up one but ,, not quite as high as the auditor just yet, which means you tend to get hand me downs from them. agents, mags, weapons, tech, all of that- hell, even your own bodyguard. while it isn't quite a necessity, you'd still wanted one just in case your name suddenly became a hot target. your co-workers though didn't exactly seem to think it was the most important thing, one thing leading to another- until, eventually, you were stuck with Jorge.

-he's nice, he really truly is. you don't have any complaints regarding his abilities to beat someone to a pulp with a flick of your wrist or his general attitude but . he's. well.a little out of his normal sort of range. he's not entirely used to being someone's bodyguard, at least not this closely. it just feels ,, weird to be sticking to your side so often when he's used to being a little more off on his own. luckily, you do give him plenty of time and space to himself but ,, it still takes him a good while to adjust

-usually, when you're at your own base of sorts, it's safe enough that he can go off and you can be trusted alone. though, he still comes in every now and then to check on you and make sure nothings up. which ,, usually there isn't, when he peeks in you tend to be busy with paperwork, monitering (if audi passes it to you for a time), or talking with your co-workers. so, it's safe to say he can't help but be a little surprised whenever that's not quite true- hence why he couldn't help but pause for a moment when he seen you passed out at your desk. he laughs a little bit at the sight, excusing it with a little 'poor little guy worked themselves ragged huh?' before quietly shutting the door and taking his leave.

-he leaves you be for a little while after that before checking in on you again- aand you're still asleep. so, he lets you be alone again. you don't seem to take very many breaks anyway, it only makes sense you might sleep a little longer than usual when you've barely gotten any kind of rest recently. but . when it starts to reach the 12+ hour mark ,, he's worried. he'd just come in to check on you one last time before clocking out himself but you were still passed out. all day, you'd barely moved an inch. anyway cue him picking you up and running off to the medical wing because hoyl shit are you fucking DEAD . are you in a coma???? what??s??? fucking wrong????? what?????

-just kinda stands there as one of the medic gives a dry sigh and explains the whole 'cold weather = tired, borderline hibernating employer' deal to him while he just kinda. stands there. he calms down a lot more when he realizes this is just a normal you thing though so !! all is well !!

-but. he still doesn't feel right leaving you completely defenseless. sure, you've got a few agents who keep post around your office / room area thing but . they're pretty fucking scrawny so like hell he trusts them to keep any real danger out. plus, if you're so cold you're functioning at the bare minimum of just breathing- he might as well try and give you some warmer company. this is my way of saying yes you do end up being held by him and yes you either lay on top of him with your head on his chest while he keeps one arm around you to lazily trace shapes and lines on your back / side or you're curled up against him . ( semi related but if you start purring at any point while he's holding you he goes fucking mental /pos )

-kinda continues into the next morning but he's actually able to wake you up buuut . you're obviously still a little too fucked up to get much done, just giving some little murmur that he can just forge your signature on any of the paperwork you've got and can wake you to ask for clarifications on stuff if 100% totally necessary . so ! he does exactly that. pov you're some random agent who walked in only to see jorge sitting where you normally do while you stay sitting on his lap for some kind of warmth (and so he can wake you if needed) .

-speaking of, if anyone does come in to try and talk to you- he's already hissing a 'shhh' at them before they can get a word out (he insists that it's so they don't wake you up for anything dumb >:[ ) . unfortunately though it usually serves to just make you stir and squirm a little from your sleep

- he does end up waking you a few times to ask questions (and most of them you kind of stare at him a little because you can't tell if he's serious or not) but for the most part it all turns out a-ok and you get some sleep <33 you do however also get a scolding from your co-workers because fun fact ! jorge cannot forge your signature to save his fucking life . it's not even remotely accurate. you end up redoing all the paperwork once it warms back up. you don't regret it.

#i love him so much. he's so fucking dumb.#perfect req because im tired and im cold and i also keep passing the fuck out #fell asleep on my laptop twice yesterday alone #madcom jorge x reader #jorge x reader #madcom x reader #madcom imagines #madness combat imagines #madness combat x reader #rot writes

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