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#miriam soltero
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The land of untold stories
She awakes suddenly to her heart pounding loudly in her chest. The room is pitch black except for a sliver of moon shining through the blinds. He visited her dreams again tonight.
She puts one hand on her forehead and sighs; while the other arm reaches across hoping that miraculously the vast absence beside her has been filled. And it only takes five seconds for the truth to settle in. She is alone, more alone than she’s ever been. There’s just something obvious about emptiness even when you try to convince yourself otherwise.
No matter how much you tell yourself you are over someone, your heart knows the truth. You see even if we lie to ourselves during the day the body is compelled to speak the truth at night. Maybe its because we talk so much during the day we can’t hear what the heart is saying. And if you don’t pay attention then it talks to you through a dream or a memory. And a dream is a poem the body writes. Therefore her nights were long and her dreams were endless.
They had broken every promise and vow that they made… and yet she loved him just the same. Dreams were a place her subconscious screamed loudly that it was over. He was gone, the marriage over. Left with only empty space and memories that no one, not even she, could ever erase. So it was always late at night, when everything and everyone else was quiet that those voices would rise up like ghosts, soft and haunting filling her mind until sleep finally came.
But when morning rose she’d always wake up distraught, knowing that her startling reality was much too different. That she couldn’t dive into her dreams and simply pluck them to life. They were just snapshots and short glimpses into where that life could have went had it kept on going in that direction. And she can’t help but wonder if she’ll ever be someone worth holding, someone worth keeping.
So she dreams what she’d not dare say awake. But the nights are not simply long enough to jump start her heart again. After 10 years of marriage, here she was, in a house, in a bed, that once held everything she ever needed to be happy. Left holding only her dreams, the only thing to keep her warm at night with the damned distance unbridgeable
She once heard that time heals all wounds. But she can’t totally agree. She’s come to think that there are wounds that time cannot heal and distances that simply do not make oblivion.
Each night each of us dreams of what we are less aware of during the day. But there are things you never get used to even if you have all the time in the world. You don’t get used to the empty space on the other side of the bed. You’ll never get used to not seeing their smile. Or avoid buying 2 drinks in a bar, or 2 tickets for a concert. Or to avoid smelling their perfume. Or to that feeling of heartbreak every time you look in the mirror and realize that you are the biggest fool of all for letting go the love of your life.
Outside the dawn is breaking. She only has a couple precious hours of sleep left in the night. So she closes her eyes and falls asleep to their song. The one he dedicated many years ago. The one he said reminded him of her. And like a key that unlocked their past she fell into a dream of him and her. And in the land of untold stories, in the echo of their story she losses herself in one more dream again…
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ballorita1010 · 3 years
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¿Tiene Oc's solteros? :^
Si la verdad xd
Diré los que están solteros y diré con los que las personas ya no hable con ellas o no supe, así que sorry pero serán considerado solteros por ser mis Oc's xd
NO diré a los bebes o a los que aún están en desarrollo por ser hijos bebes o niños ;u;
Summer
Valentín
Nancy
Flora
Alonzo
Yael
María
Erick
Yuu
Abigail
Miriam
Jina (meh de todos modos es asexual para el amor sentimental, o sea no quiere pareja aún)
Catalina
Berta
Elena (meh también)
Gema(meh x3)
Artur (pero es asexual, tiene algunos traumas)
Declan (pero no cree poder tener por su trabajo tan ocupado)
Melinda
Selfaba
Karol
(Los niños asesinos están solteros, ya van a crecer más, pero por el momento no pienso darlos para nada)
Cindy (ya no hable con la persona sorry se quedará algo soltera por el momento)
David lo mencionaria pero @erixhope-owo ya no avanzamos nada xd, pero aún así no estará soltero
Vicky (porque ya no me hablo la persona y no hubo avance ni nada lo siento, ya no recuerdo ni con quien era xd)
Allan pues...necesito que la persona me diga si se continúa aaa, pero no recuerdo quien es
Y....esos
Están mis 3 guardias de fnaf que son Emma, Ivan y Maily, pero meh-
Esos son mis solteros según mi criterio-
Además que no soy muy buena organizandome con ships y...ahora que muchos de mis Oc's tienen parejas les juro que es complicado llevar la historia de ellos, aunque no lo crean si lo es, pero esos son mis solteros (menos David solo necesito la confirmación de la chica :c), aún así ahm..
Miren por el momento no quiero hacer muchas ships porque les juro que cuesta mucho llevar la historia de mis Oc's :"(, entonces...prefiero avanzar las que tengo ya y si en algún momento quiero otra yo diré
También que las personas que tengan las ships conmigo me ayuden a avanzar, soy mala con las ships aún porque yo hacia mis propias para tener orden 😢, pero Ahora es más complicado, así que plis ayúdenme también con los que tengo ship que les juro que me cuesta mucho-
Gracias por el Ask también xdd💖💖💖
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hhinsectmafias · 5 years
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Hola, una pregunta Quienes están solteros o solteras? Por si algún día se me ocurre presentarles a alguien sin que les afecte si tienen pareja hehe 😳😳😳
Lol x''D esta pregunta debí contestarla hace mucho, soy muy olvidadiza lo siento xd en fin :U los ocs que están solteros y solteras son estos:
BATIM
- Hombres:
Alan
Belmont
Kenjiro
Erick
Sekki (aunque a este men no se los recomiendo creeanme xd)
- Mujeres:
Miriam
Elena
Annie
Scarlet
Agnes
Isabela
Andrea
Samanta
Ángel
HAZBIN HOTEL
- Mujeres:
Saint Just (aunque esta ya va a tener una pareja creada netamente por mí uwu)
CUPHEAD
- Hombres:
Peter
- Mujeres:
Sonia
Como podrá ver tengo mas ocs en BATIM que en otro fandom xd pero ya me voy encargando de eso. Necesito tiempo señores! >8u
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Veda Ann Borg.
Filmografía
- Tres hurras por el amor (1936) - Consuelo Dormant
- Hombres en el exilio (1937) - Rita Crane
- San Quintín (1937) - Helen
- Kid Galahad (1937) - La pelirroja
- El caso del obispo tartamudo (1937) - Gladys
- El marino cantante (1937) - Diane
- Boda pública (1937) - Bernice
- Marry the Girl (1937) - Enfermera con dibujos animados en uniforme
- Confesión (1937) - Xenia
- Varsity Show (1937) - Passerby (sin acreditar)
- Lo que busco es el amor (1937) - Elsie
- Isla de Alcatraz (1937) - La cabeza roja
- Submarino D-1 (1937) - Dolly
- Testigos desaparecidos (1937) - Miss Friday (sin acreditar)
- Ella amaba a un bombero (1937) - Betty Williams
- Sobre el muro (1938) - Maxine
- La ley llega a Texas (1939) - Dora Lewis
- Milagro en la calle principal (1939) - Flo
- La sombra (1940, serial) - Margot Lane
- Cafe Hostess (1940) - Cafe Hostess (sin acreditar)
- Hago este juramento (1940) - Flo
- Dr. Christian conoce a las mujeres (1940) - Carol Compton
- Riéndose del peligro (1940) - Celeste
- Glamour en venta (1940) - Lucille
- Hit Parade de 1941 (1940) - (sin acreditar)
- Amargo dulce (1940) - Manon
- Melody Ranch (1940) - Recepcionista (sin acreditar)
- Detrás de las noticias (1940) - Bessie
- Juez de Arkansas (1941) - Hettie Huston
- La pena (1941) - Julie
- I'll Wait for You (1941) - Manicurist (sin acreditar)
- The Get-Away (1941) - Recogida de Black's Blonde Dance Hall (sin acreditar)
- El chico de Pittsburgh (1941) - Barbara Ellison
- Down in San Diego (1941) - Cajero (sin acreditar)
- Honky Tonk (1941) - Perla
- Los hermanos corsos (1941) - Maria
- Duque de la Marina (1942) - Maureen
- Dos yanquis en Trinidad (1942) - Bubbles
- Ella está en el ejército (1942) - Diane Jordan
- Me casé con un ángel (1942) - Ilona Prohaska (sin acreditar)
- Sherlock Holmes y el arma secreta (1942) - Bar Singer (voz, sin acreditar)
- Algo para gritar (1943) - Flo Bentley
- Asesinato en Times Square (1943) - Fiona Maclair
- Caras falsas (1943) - Joyce Ford
- Isla de los pecados olvidados (1943) - Luana
- La venganza de los zombis (1943) - Lila Von Altermann
- La chica de Monterrey (1943) - Flossie Rankin
- El invitado desconocido (1943) - Helen Walker.
- Chico inteligente (1943) - Lee
- Solo habitación de pie (1944) - Peggy Fuller
- Detective Kitty O'Day (1944) - Sra. Wentworth
- Senderos marcados (1944) - Blanche - también conocida como Mary Conway, también conocida como Susanna
- La chica que se atrevió (1944) - Cynthia Harrison / Sylvia Scott
- El gran ruido (1944) - Mayme Charlton
- Los ojos irlandeses están sonriendo (1944) - Belle La Tour
- El halcón en Hollywood (1944) - Billie Atkins
- Qué rubia (1945) - Pat Campbell
- Isla de niebla (1945) - Sylvia
- Bring On the Girls (1945) - Chica en el bar con Phil (sin acreditar)
- Áspero, resistente y listo (1945) - Lorine Gray
- Don Juan Quilligan (1945) - Beattle LaRue
- Stiff asustado (1945) - Flo Rosson
- Intruso peligroso (1945) - Jenny
- Jungle Raiders (1945, Serie) - Cora Bell
- Amor, honor y adiós (1945) - Marge
- Mildred Pierce (1945) - Miriam Ellis
- La vida con Blondie (1945) - Hazel
- Avalancha (1946) - Claire Jeremy
- Gran ciudad (1946) - Vivian LeRoy
- Cómplice (1946) - Joyce Kimball Bonniwell
- Se busca esposa (1946) - Nola Reed
- La fabulosa Suzanne (1946) - Mary
- La dama peregrina (1947) - Eve Standish
- El soltero y el Bobby-Soxer (1947) - Agnes Prescott
- Madre llevaba mallas (1947) - Rosemary Olcott
- Rubia salvaje (1947) - Connie Harper
- Julia se porta mal (1948) - Louise
- Chicken Every Sunday (1949) - Rita Kirby
- Ritmo de Mississippi (1949) - Jeanette
- Un último viaje (1949) - Gaye Winston Lardner
- Mujeres olvidadas (1949) - Clair Dunning
- Jinete de Tucson (1950) - Gypsy Avery
- El niño canguro (1950) - Stella Grey
- Hold That Line (1952) - Candy Calin
- Aaron Slick de Punkin Crick (1952) - Chica de rojo
- Big Jim McLain (1952) - Madge
- Un viaje peligroso (1953) - Sadie
- Señor Scoutmaster (1953) - Rubia
- Noticias calientes (1953) - Doris Burton
- Tres marineros y una niña (1953) - Faye Foss
- Bitter Creek (1954) - Whitey
- Ámame o déjame (1955) - Dance Hall Hostess (sin acreditar)
- Nunca eres demasiado joven (1955) - Sra. Noonan
- Chicos y muñecas (1955) - Laverne
- Lloraré mañana (1955) - Waitress (sin acreditar)
- Jugador de la frontera (1956) - Francie Merritt
- Pistola desnuda (1956) - Susan Star
- Las alas de las águilas (1957) - (sin acreditar)
- Los Fearmakers (1958) - Vivian Loder
- Thunder in the Sun (1959) - Marie (sin acreditar)
- El Álamo (1960) - Blind Nell Robertson.
Créditos: Tomado de Wikipedia
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Veda_Ann_Borg
#HONDURASQUEDATEENCASA
#ELCINELATELEYMICKYANDONIE
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soycabcba · 3 years
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Pedido de Belgrano Primero para el voto del grupo familiar
La agrupación Belgrano Primero que lleva a Luis Artime como candidato a presidente para las elecciones del 6 de febrero, le presentó a la comisión directiva del club una nota en la que solicita una variación a lo expuesto en el artículo 23 del estatuto del club sobre lo que es considerado grupo familiar.
Artime se presentó en la sede del Pirata en Artuto Orgaz 510, junto a integrantes de la comisión de Género de su agrupación, más el apoderado de la lista, Alejandro Moyano y Miriam Aparicio, para formalmente pedirle al Club que “se permita votar a todas y todos los socios de cada grupo familiar mayores de 16 años, ya que actualmente el estatuto solo habilita al titular, excluyendo al resto que también tienen derecho a participar de la elección. Esperamos una pronta y efectiva respuesta para solucionar esta injusticia y así consolidar una democracia plena y participativa”.
Lo que Belgrano Primero pide es que se modifique el artículo 23º del estatuto que sostiene: “Socios Familiar: se considerará al grupo familiar compuesto por el titular como socio activo y tres o más integrantes del núcleo familiar que en forma fehaciente acrediten estar a cargo del titular, en cuyo caso, abonarán una cuota diferenciada que establecerá la Comisión Directiva. El Socio activo titular, deberá presentar la solicitud establecida en el art. 15. Esta prerrogativa es válida para esposa, hijos solteros menores de 20 años. No tendrán derechos políticos y solamente podrán hacer uso de las instalaciones sociales en los lugares y oportunidades que la C.D. determine”.
Lo peticionado debe ser analizado por la actual comisión y resuelto a fin de que se establezca para las elecciones de febrero. Aunque no fue tenido en cuenta por el grupo político del club que pidió sobre el artículo 23, también podrían ingresar en análisis algunas otras excepciones de asociados no autorizados a votar, como las establecidas en los artículos 26 (socios jugadores, que son los que integran los planteles de fútbol amateur en los que el club intervenga como entidad federada) y el 29 (socio dependiente, donde se nuclea a los trabajadores del club).
Una vez que la comisión directiva resuelva, se elevará a la Comisión Electoral para que la misma analice y responda lo pedido, pues implica una modificación estatutaria.
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Firma y pedido. Luis Artime rubricando lo solicitado por Belgrano Primero a la CD. (Prensa Belgrano Primero)
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(Prensa Belgrano Primero)
source https://mundod.lavoz.com.ar/futbol/pedido-de-belgrano-primero-para-el-voto-del-grupo-familiar
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gfmiranday · 5 years
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*CRIA IIda-U.R.Vta* *ACCIDENTE DE TRANSITO:* A hrs 16:10 se toma conocimiento que entre Calles Castro Barros y San Nicolas se habria producido un accidente de transito, se comsiona al lugar U.M Legajo 755 a/c Crio Llanos, verificando tal situación,tratandose de un impacto entre una motocicleta Marca Cerro,S/D,de 110 cc, color rojo, conducida por el ciudadano *Oliva Victor Diogenes* ,Argentino, instruido,de 47 años, DNI N° 22305613,domiciliado en B° Nueva ciudad, Y un automóvil Chevrolet Aveo, dominio JNL 458, de color gris, conducido por el ciudadano *DIAZ PABLO MIGUEL* ,Argentino, soltero, 25 años de edad, DNI 37641316, domiciliado en B° Matadero Viejo, el cual iba acompañado por *Zalazar Gabriel Fernando* ,Argentino, intruido,soltero,de 26 años de edad,domiciliado en Calle Santiago del Estero N° 356 del Barrio 3 Esquinas de ésta Ciudad.Se traslada al conductor del rodado menor en ambulancia local a/c Dra Reartes.Trabaja en el lugar Personal de Accidentes Viales a/c Cabo 1° Flores Miriam. *CONSTE* https://www.instagram.com/p/B19uT56HfH0/?igshid=4n07k3myagdl
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revistapuntodevista · 4 years
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Se busca mejorar la calidad de vida de madres y padres solteros
Se busca mejorar la calidad de vida de madres y padres solteros
San Luis Potosí SLP.- Con el objetivo de atender la transversalización de las políticas públicas para favorecer la calidad de vida de padres y madres solteros, la diputada Sonia Mendoza Díaz, junto con las ciudadanas Blanca Estela Gardea, Mónica Fabiola Rodríguez Herrera, Clara Joaquina Méndez Escobar, Reyna Asminda Solís Guzmán, Esmeralda Bustamante Mendoza, Miriam Souverbille Martínez, presentó…
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tiendadepadel · 6 years
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Hola! Hemos llegado para estar con todos vosotros. Somos Miriam, Alberto y Jorge, tres amigos que nos conocemos de hacer maldades en nuestra juventud, como debe ser.
Un tiempo después nos hemos vuelto a juntar con las ganas de pasarlo bien intactas y el espíritu rebelde y viajero de siempre. Por eso decidimos juntar nuestras ilusiones en un proyecto común llamado Viajes Single, con el fin de contagiar nuestras ganas de disfrutar a los demás.
Si te encuentras con unos dias de vacaciones, estas soltero con hijos o sin ellos, y no coincides con nadie para irte a desconectar unos dias, aqui te mostramos muchas de las opciones que se pueden encontrar en una agencia de viajes oficial.
Con nosotros conocerás los mejores destinos turísticos, playas, alojamientos en los hoteles mas indicados en cada ciudad, con los viajes singles, habrá muchas personas como tu, ganas de pasarlo bien, y quizás encontrar una persona de la que enamorarte y compartir buenos momentos.
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valladolidnoticias · 6 years
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El 83% de los hogares monoparentales están encabezados por mujeres
Miriam Martín y Eva de la Fuente son mujeres jóvenes, trabajadoras, madres solteras y están al frente de dos de las 96.600 familias monoparentales que hay en Castilla y León. Criar a un hijo nunca fue fácil, pero ellas además lo hacen en solitario, como única cabeza de familia de sus hogares.
Las familias monoparentales son las formadas por una persona adulta con uno o más hijos y son las mujeres las que encabezan y sostienen en su mayoría estos hogares. Asumir en solitario todas las responsabilidades de criar y educar a sus hijos y la conciliación de la vida laboral y familiar son algunas de las dificultades a las que se enfrentan este tipo de familias.
Miriam Martín vive en Zamora y tiene un hijo de diez años. Eva de la Fuente reside en Arcenillas, un municipio de la provincia ubicado a siete kilómetros de la capital zamorana, y su hijo va a cumplir 14 años. Ambas, que trabajan desde hace años, explican que nunca han recibido ayudas directas ni beneficios exclusivos por ser familias monoparentales. Tampoco tienen prioridad respecto a otro tipo de familias a la hora de solicitar becas o ayudas para libros. «No hay ninguna ayuda por ser familia monoparental. Miran los ingresos y te da igual ser un solo miembro adulto que un matrimonio», explica Martín.
Sentadas frente a frente, conversan. Tienen muchas cosas en común además de ser madres solteras. la importante ayuda con la que han contado en estos años por parte de sus familias. Algo nada despreciable. Gracias a ellas han podido conciliar la vida laboral y la familiar. De no haber sido así, reconocen, todo hubiera sido mucho más complicado.
«En mi caso no ha sido difícil, porque me ha ayudado toda mi familia, mis padres y mis tíos, y no he tenido ningún problema. Pero una persona que no tenga a nadie, solamente para ir a trabajar ya tiene que estar pensando con quién dejar al niño o quién se lo cuida en ese momento, incluso tendrá que contratar a alguien para poder ir a trabajar», explica Miriam Martín, que trabaja como auxiliar de enfermería en una residencia de ancianos.
Es el caso también de Eva de la Fuente, que siempre ha trabajado en horario de tarde en la limpieza del Complejo Asistencial de Zamora y ha podido dejar a su hijo con sus padres durante la jornada laboral.
«En una familia con dos adultos siempre hay dos personas para educar y para todo. En el caso monoparental, solo hay una», resume Eva de la Fuente, como el escollo más evidente. «Yo creo que es difícil criar a un hijo de todas formas, sola o acompañada, pero imagino que, con una persona al lado, puedes apoyarte en ella. De esta forma, te llevas tú todo, lo bueno y lo malo», afirma. Ninguna de las dos se ha encontrado con problemas en su puesto de trabajo o para acceder a un empleo por ser madre soltera. Son conscientes de que esa discriminación laboral no se ha dado por haber contado con la ayuda de sus familias para cuidar a los menores. Tampoco, aseguran, han sufrido ningún tipo de discriminación social en una época en la que los hogares monoparentales aumentan año tras año.
Las 96.600 familias monoparentales de Castilla y León representan el 10% de los 1.023.200 hogares que hay en total en la comunidad. Según los datos de 2016 del Instituto Nacional de Estadística (INE), la mayoría de los hogares monoparentales de la región están encabezados por mujeres, concretamente, el 83,02%, con 79.700 mujeres que se hacen cargo en solitario de sus familias. Los hombres representan el 17,49% del total, con 16.900 varones al frente de hogares monoparentales en Castilla y León.
Pero el fenómeno de la monoparentalidad no es nuevo. María García es leonesa y tuvo a su hijo en los años setenta del pasado siglo como madre soltera. En 1984 creó la Asociación de Madres Solteras Isadora Duncan, convertida después en la Fundación de Familias Monoparentales Isadora Duncan, de la que es presidenta.
«Limbo jurídico»
Uno de los motivos para ese cambio de denominación es que la sociedad ha ido cambiando y el colectivo de familias con un adulto a su cargo cada vez es más amplio.
La primera demanda de la fundación es una ley monoparental en la que se defina jurídicamente el concepto de familia monoparental. «Pedimos una clarificación jurídica, que se describa jurídicamente qué es familia monoparental y que se contemple todo el arco de la monoparentalidad», explica. Ese sería el primer paso, sostiene, para después, poder demandar derechos de conciliación de la vida laboral y familiar o su presencia en la ley de educación o del trabajo, en las que asegura que ahora no existen. «Ahora estamos en un limbo jurídico y no solo no tenemos beneficios, sino que somos castigadas fiscalmente», manifiesta María García.
Denuncia que estas familias están sometidas a mayores dificultades porque no hay ayudas económicas específicas para ellas o, las que hay, están sujetas al Indicador Público de Renta de Efectos Múltiples (IPREM), un índice empleado para la concesión de ayudas que asegura que es «bajísimo». «Hay que estar casi en la miseria para tener derecho a algo», consideran desde la entidad y apuntan a que la mayoría de las familias monoparentales tienen un salario de 15.000 a 16.000 euros al año.
Demandan desde la Fundación de Familias Monoparentales Isadora Duncan, que trabaja de forma física en León y a través de Internet para toda España, una política familiar real para acabar con la pobreza de todas las familias y que en ella se incluya también a las monoparentales. «Pedimos que se ayude a la familia media, que es la que está cayendo en la pobreza y se está haciendo que se venga abajo por ser castigada por Hacienda y por no tener derecho a nada porque ya tiene un pequeño salario», denuncia la presidenta, quien asegura que la mayoría de las familias con un solo adulto a cargo tienen ingresos, pero «a causa de esos ingresos, las hacen pobres porque hay que pagarlo todo». Enumera los gastos de guardería, comedor o programas educativos como Madrugadores, y reitera que estas familias están fiscalmente «castigadas» por Hacienda, donde aparecen como «una soltera o un soltero más».
Cáritas Diocesana de Zamora alude al informe Foessa para subrayar que en los últimos años se ha producido un descenso de la renta media y un empobrecimiento de la sociedad, una situación que afecta más a las personas y familias más vulnerables, con baja intensidad laboral y a hogares monoparentales con hijos menores y familias numerosas.
Más vulnerables
Aseguran que el hecho de ser mujer sola con familia a cargo hace más vulnerables todavía a estas personas, lo que se acrecienta si la intensidad laboral del hogar es muy baja o son ciudadanos extracomunitarios. Observan desde Cáritas que el hecho de que existan personas mayores, como abuelos, que puedan quedarse con los niños, facilita la conciliación e incluso el impulso económico de estas familias. Enfatizan que el cambio en las políticas sociales en los últimos años ha tenido consecuencias negativas en el sistema de prestaciones sanitarias, la financiación del sistema educativo o los servicios sociales públicos.
En Castilla y León, aunque no existen deducciones fiscales específicas para este tipo de familias, son aplicables cualquiera de los beneficios fiscales de apoyo a la familia que existen, tanto para las madres como para los padres en solitario. De esta forma, si en la familia hay un progenitor, éste puede aplicarse deducciones por nacimiento o adopción de hijos o por el cuidado de hijos menores de cuatro años, informaron desde la Junta. De las 8.124 familias atendidas en 2016 por los Servicios Sociales de la Consejería de Familia e Igualdad con prestaciones económicas para necesidades básicas de subsistencia, el número de familias monoparentales fue de 1.365. Además, se contabilizaron 2.401 unidades familiares monoparentales que percibieron la Renta Garantizada de Ciudadanía en Castilla y León. De ellas, 2.233 tenían a una mujer como cabeza de familia y 168 a un hombre.
Fuente: El Norte de Castilla
El 83% de los hogares monoparentales están encabezados por mujeres was originally published on Noticias
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tuseriesdetv · 7 years
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Noticias de series de la semana: 'This Is Us' no competirá por su vestuario
This Is Us pierde una nominación a los Emmy
El vestuario del último episodio de la temporada les valió una nominación al mejor vestuario contemporáneo. Ahora ha sido descalificada porque menos del 51% del episodio transcurre en los últimos 25 años, por lo que simplemente no puede competir. La serie queda, por tanto, con diez nominaciones. La nueva nominada es House of Cards gracias al noveno episodio de su quinta temporada. [Fuente]
Katrina no llega
Anthony Hemingway, director, dice que la cosa se ha estancado, pero tampoco tienen muy claro por qué. La que debía ser la segunda temporada de American Crime Story y acabó convirtiéndose en la tercera debido a los retrasos de producción, al parecer, depende de la voluntad de Ryan Murphy. Puede que nunca llegue a realizarse. Culpan a Murphy de no haber prestado la suficiente atención a su desarrollo. [Fuente]
¿Se acaba TBBT?
"Nunca nos imaginamos llegar hasta las once temporadas. Uno podría suponer fácilmente que la doce sería el final de la serie", dijo Chuck Lorre sobre The Big Bang Theory en la presentación de Young Sheldon en los TCA. Kelly Kahl, la nueva presidenta de CBS Entertainment, dice que le gustaría continuar todo lo posible. Lo que siempre han comentado Lorre y su equipo es que no plantean las tramas temporada a temporada como hacen la mayoría de series, sino que avanzan episodio a episodio. [Fuente]
Bryan Fuller sobre Star Trek: Discovery
Según cuenta el creador de Pushing Daisies y Hannibal, CBS no le permitió crear una antología que ampliase el universo Star Trek al estilo American Horror Story. En su lugar, harían una única historia serializada. Además, confiesa que antes de abandonar la serie tuvo enfrentamientos sobre vestuario, dirección y reparto y que el segundo aplazamiento de la fecha de estreno fue debido a que AMC no liberaba a Sonequa Martin-Green de su contrato hasta que se emitiese su fallecimiento en The Walking Dead. [Fuente]
Habla el novio de Versace
"Se ha hablado y escrito mucho sobre el tema del asesinato, pero nada parecido a la realidad". Antonio D'Amico comenta que nadie le ha consultado para llevar el caso a la pequeña pantalla, que asesino y víctima no se conocían y que la representación en la serie de su reacción al encontrar el cuerpo de su pareja, aunque poética, es incorrecta y ridícula. [Fuente]
Renovaciones de series
NBC ha renovado Will & Grace por una décima temporada
Freeform ha renovado Famous in Love por una segunda temporada
Gold ha renovado The Rebel por una segunda temporada
Bounce TV ha renovado Saints & Sinners por una tercera temporada
Cancelaciones de series
La novena temporada de The Middle será la última
Sky 1 ha cancelado Hooten & The Lady tras su primera temporada
Incorporaciones y fichajes de series
Sylvester Stallone participará en al menos un episodio de la segunda temporada de This Is Us. Será la estrella de la película que Kevin va a grabar en Los Ángeles.
Abigail Spencer (Timeless, Rectify) se une como recurrente a Grey's Anatomy. Sustituye a Bridget Regan en el papel de Megan, la hermana de Owen.
Allison Williams (Girls, Get Out) será Marianne, una conocida de Melrose en Nueva York, en Patrick Melrose.
Isabelle Huppert (Elle, The Piano Teacher), Christina Hendricks (Mad Men, Another Period), John Slattery (Mad Men, Desperate Housewives), Amanda Peet (Togetherness, Brockmire), Jack Huston (Boardwalk Empire, American Hustle) y Marthe Keller (Marathon Man, Black Sunday) protagonizarán The Romanoffs, la antología de Matthew Weiner sobre gente de nuestros días que se cree descendiente de la familia real rusa.
Julius Tennon, el marido de Viola Davis, participará en al menos un episodio de How to Get Away with Murder. No se conocen detalles de su personaje.
Marlee Matlin (Switched at Birth, The L Word) será Jocelyn Turner, una agente del FBI sorda, en la tercera temporada de Quantico.
Erica Tazel (Barbara) no volverá como regular a la segunda temporada de The Good Fight, aunque podría aparecer en futuros episodios. Michael Boatman (Julius Cain) y Nyambi Nyambi (Jay Dipersia) han sido ascendidos a regulares. Audra McDonald (Private Practice, Beauty and the Beast) se une como regular retomando su papel de The Good Wife - Liz Lawrence, exmujer de Adrian Boseman (Delroy Lindo).
James Wolk (Zoo, The Crazy Ones) se une como recurrente a la segunda temporada de Goliath. Será el agente del FBI Jeff Clayton.
Sydelle Noel (GLOW) será recurrente en la sexta temporada de Arrow como la agente del FBI Samanda Watson.
Jes Macallan (Mistresses) será recurrente en la tercera temporada de Legends of Tomorrow como Ava Sharpe, agente de la rama del gobierno federal dedicada al control del tiempo.
Emma Booth (Underbelly, Gods of Egypt) se une como recurrente a la séptima temporada de Once Upon A Time.
Laura Benanti (Edie) ha sido ascendida a regular de cara a la tercera temporada de The Detour.
Shaun Toub (Homeland) y Jay Hernandez (Hostel, Suicide Squad) se unen a la séptima y última temporada de Scandal. Se desconocen detalles.
Kelly Stables (The Exes) será recurrente en la tercera temporada de Superstore como Kelly, nueva trabajadora de Cloud 9.
J.R. Ramirez (Power, Arrow) será regular en la segunda temporada de Jessica Jones como Oscar, nuevo vecino de Jessica.
Usman Ally (Veep, A Series of Unfortunate Events) será recurrente en la séptima temporada de Suits como Andrew Malik, Fiscal General Adjunto.
Michael Aronov (The Americans) y Aida Turturro (The Sopranos, Deep Blue Sea) se unen como recurrentes a la quinta temporada de The Blacklist.
David Morse (Treme, Outsiders) se une a Benicio del Toro, Paul Dano y Patricia Arquette en Escape at Dannemora. Será Gene Palmer, agente de la prisión.
Hartley Sawyer será Ralph Dibny AKA The Elongated Man en The Flash.
Jeff Ward será recurrente en la quinta temporada de Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Se desconocen detalles.
Nia Long (Empire, The Divide) se une como regular a la novena temporada de NCIS: LA. Será Shay Mosely, antigua agente del Servicio Secreto y ayudante ejecutiva de dirección del equipo.
Noah Bean (12 Monkeys, Nikita) será recurrente en la segunda temporada de Shut Eye como Foster Hillburn, asistente del fiscal y padre soltero.
Meagan Good aparecerá en dos episodios de White Famous volviendo a interpretar a la estrella del pop Kali, personaje de Californication.
Gabriel Mann (Revenge) será recurrente en Damnation como Martin Eggers Hyde, un intelectual y visionario.
Zach Cherry (Crashing, Search Party) y Luca Padovan (School of Rock) se unen a You. Serán Ethan, cajero de la librería de Joe (Penn Badgley), y Paco, vecino de Joe.
Michael Ironside (Top Gun, X-Men: First Class) será recurrente en The Alienist como el banquero J.P. Morgan.
Jean Villepique (Veep, Up All Night) se une como regular a AP Bio, sustituyendo a Vanessa Bayer, en el papel de Michelle, una profesora fiestera.
Dylan Baker (The Good Wife, The Americans), Julian Morris (Pretty Little Liars, Once Upon A Time) y Mark Stanley (Broken) serán Mr. March, John Brooke (el tutor de Laurie Laurence) y Bhaer en Little Women.
Dhafer L'Abidine (Sex and the City 2, Casualty) se une a The Looming Tower.
Dave Annable (Brothers & Sisters) y Gil Birmingham (Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, Hell or High Water) serán Lee Dutton, el hijo mayor de John (Kevin Costner), y Thomas Rainwater, un jefe indio que reta a los Dutton, en Yellowstone. Wendy Moniz (House of Cards) será recurrente como Lynelle Perry, gobernadora de Montana.
Robinne Lee (Fifty Shades Darker, Being Mary Jane), Brad James (Underground, For Better or Worse), W. Earl Brown (Preacher, Deadwood), Demetria McKinney (Saints & Sinners, House of Payne), Diamond Dallas Page (WWE), Morgana Van Peebles (We the Party), T.C. Carter y Tatiana Lia Zappardino se unen a Superstition.
Chris Parnell (Saturday Night Live) y Trevor Jackson (American Crime) retomarán sus papeles del backdoor pilot -el decano y un estudiante de segundo año- en Grown-ish, nuevo título del spin-off de Black-ish. Emily Arlook (The Good Place, Hand of God) se une interpretando a Miriam, una estudiante nueva.
Jack Griffo (The Thundermans) y Kerri Medders serán Dylan, un amigo de Lucas (Emery Kelly), y Gwenny, rival de Alexa, en Alexa & Katie.
Pósters de series
      Nuevas series
Starz desarrolla la serie Ascendant, que cerraría las tramas de la saga cinematográfica Divergente. Se desconoce si contará con alguno de los actores anteriores.
En el veinte aniversario de su creación, el autor y la editorial del manga One Piece anuncian que producirán, junto a Marty Adelstein (Prison Break, Good Behavior) y Becky Clements (Good Behavior, Snowpiercer), su adaptación televisiva de acción real.
Glen Mazzara (The Walking Dead) escribirá la adaptación televisiva del cuarto libro de la saga The Dark Tower. Idris Elba, Dennis Haysbert y Tom Taylor repetirán con los personajes de la película.
YouTube Red tendrá su propia comedia secuela de Karate Kid, titulada Cobra Kai, protagonizada por dos de sus protagonistas treinta años después. Ralph Macchio y William Zabka volverán como Daniel LaRusso y Johhny Lawrence. En ella, Johnny reable el dojo buscando la redención, cosa que no le hace ninguna gracia a Daniel. Escriben Josh Heald (Hot Tub Time Machine) y Jon Hurwitz y Hayden Schlossberg (Harold and Kumar). Recibió luz verde directa con un encargo de diez episodios.
Starz ha adquirido el drama Sweetbitter, la adaptación de la novela de Stephanie Danler (2016) por ella misma junto a Stu Zicherman (The  Americans, The Affair), sobre una joven de veintidós años que consigue un trabajo en un restaurante de Nueva York entrando entonces en un mundo de alcohol, amor, lujuria, drogas, antros y cenas de lujo. Produce Brad Pitt.
CBS All Access ha dado luz verde a Strange Angel, basada en la novela de George Pendle (2005), sobre un hombre brillante y misterioso que vive en Los Ángeles durante los años 40 y por el día diseña cohetes y por la noche realiza rituales mágicos sexuales como discípulo del ocultista Aleister Crowley.
CBS All Access encarga la comedia No Activity, sobre los aspectos menos asombrosos de una gran redada contra un cártel de droga.
CBS All Access da luz verde al thriller de misterio $1, ambientado en un pueblo estadounidense tras la recesión, donde un billete de un dólar conecta a un variopinto grupo de personajes involucrados en un asesinato múltiple, descubriendo así multitud de secretos del lugar.
Fechas de series
La tercera temporada de Mr. Robot llega a USA Network el 11 de octubre
Mindhunter se estrena en Netflix el 13 de octubre
La segunda temporada de Travelers llega a Showcase el 16 de octubre
Tráilers de series
Mindhunter
youtube
Narcos - Temporada 3
youtube
Mr. Robot - Temporada 3
youtube
She's Gotta Have It
youtube
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Solo un besito mas...
“Hey, you know I love you very much?” I nudge my niece. We are sitting on my bed playing some game or other like we always do when she is over.
“Yea I know” She’s always reluctant for words. Then she grabs my hands softly and asks “Is it true?”
“Is what true?”
“That you’re really, really sick this time?”
I sigh. Here she is short of 11 years old and having to face a reality I wished to shelter her from. “Yes darling. Unfortunately it seems I’ve run out of lives. But hey! No worries! When I go you can have all my nail polish and jewelry okay?” And I smile hoping to remove the sadness out of the reality.
“Okay Mimi” she says and stays quiet for a while. “And Mimi?”
“Yes”
“I love you too” and she kisses my cheek. The most gentle and purest gesture that she could give. And in that kiss grants me all the love that she possesses.
I try not to look directly at her, because if I did I’d break right in front of her. But from the corner of my eyes I see her eyes water and she discretely wipes a tear. So I look up at the ceiling trying my best not to cry. And I remember that quote from the “Fault in our Stars” that says:
“Much of my life had been devoted to trying not to cry in front of people who loved me, so I knew what Augustus was doing. You clench your teeth. You look up. You tell yourself that if they see you cry, it will hurt them, and you will be nothing but a Sadness in their lives, and you must not become a mere sadness, so you will not cry, and you say all of this to yourself while looking up at the ceiling, and then you swallow even though your throat does not want to close and you look at the person who loves you and smile.”  ― John Green, The Fault in Our Stars
I didn’t want to be a mere sadness.
Since about October of 2015 things began to take a downward spiral health wise for me. I was constantly hospitalized weeks at a time with symptoms so vague it was hard to diagnose. 2016 was spent for the most part on tests and more tests, and diagnosis after diagnosis. The doctors sure that a lot of it had to do with my anatomy because of a previous surgery didn’t really have many answers. Few people had lived past all I had. A lot of it is still uncharted territory.
So when we learned during fall that I had a rare condition we met it with mixed feelings. We could finally make sense of what had been happening. But at the same time we were diving head first into such a rare syndrome with very little medical expectations that I’d even be able to survive. It turns out my large intestine and pancreas had made the hole in my diaphragm big and climbed up to my chest. This collapsed my left lung and made it very difficult to breathe. I was extremely tired, and even a walk to the kitchen would leave me breathless. I spent the next months strapped mostly to bed. I couldn’t really handle going anywhere or even walking. With not enough oxygen even holding a conversation too long became unbearable.
I saw 3 surgeons before one decided that surgery was my only way of surviving. But this would be a majorly invasive surgery with a lot of complications in the horizon. Because of my previous surgery in 2009 I’d developed a staph infection in my blood that causes me to fight long term use of antibiotics. My body begins to fight them as viruses. This makes me very prone to infections.
Additionally, because of the previous surgery being so invasive, my body in its healing created a lot of adhesions. This would become a problem because the adhesions would hide vital veins and even position of organs. I was also highly anemic. So going in surgically was a feat. One that not just any surgeon would take on.
A Friday after a doctor’s appointment I began to be so out of breath my sister rushed me to the hospital, by Sunday my body went into total shock when my small intestine began to strangulate and my stomach began cutting blood supply to my organs. I was dying. The surgeon was rushed and within an hour I was downstairs being prepped for surgery.
Nothing prepares you to say a final goodbye to the people you love. With only a 25% chance of making it out alive off of the surgery, we were, for lack of a better word, a mess. My stats went downhill so fast we had very little time to prepare. My brother barely made it before they wheeled me away.
So on a Sunday morning we said our goodbyes, there were promises made, kisses, hugs, and a downpour of tears none of us could stop from coming. All of our hearts were aching. I made sure that my parents wouldn’t be alone during the surgery. And I shot out a goodbye text to my best friend. I made the anesthesiologist wait till my brother arrived and I was able to say goodbye to him and my niece. I realized how truly hard it was, really, to see someone you love slowly slip away right before your eyes. And worst to realize there was nothing that you could do to stop it.
There wouldn’t have been enough time in the world that morning, even if things hadn’t happened so fast. There never is when we are saying goodbye. In my last conscious moments I couldn’t help but cry uncontrollably. I feared that I was leaving a million things unaccomplished, a dozen projects unfinished, and so many words unsaid. Being deathly sick feels like getting to the end of the book and realizing 20 pages have been ripped out and you will never know how the story ends.
But that is death. It doesn’t matter if it’s sudden or it’s been a long time coming, it will always cut off life in the middle of a sentence. And no matter how prepared for it you think you are the rest of your untold life will always be the part that is the greatest loss.
My last thoughts were a memory I held close to my heart. Me at 4 or 5 at kindergarten drop off, and how every morning held the same routine. Instead of saying a short and sweet goodbye to my mom I would always drag it on never wanting to leave her side. I’d keep running back to her time and time again and burrowing my face as far into her stomach as I could. She’d stroke my hair, kneel beside me and in between the whimpering I’d whim “Solo un besito mas”.  (Just one more kiss).
Many hours later, thanks to Jehovah I was out of surgery. Everything had gone great and with no major complications the surgeons had successfully repaired the diaphragm and put almost everything back in its place. I awoke in a haze to my family hovering over me. I was incredibly happy to see them.
I spent the next weeks slowly recuperating till they finally let me go home to finish healing. Now I wish I could say this is my happy ending. That this is the ending to this heart wrenching turmoil, never having to face it again. But unfortunately that is not the case. In 5 years the syndrome will reoccur again. Once you are prone to this type of thing it will continue to occur each time getting harder and harder to fix the diaphragm.
I could look at this as a glass half empty type situation, but I refuse to. Worry doesn’t empty tomorrow of its sorrow. Its 5 whole years that I didn’t have before. And maybe that isn’t all the time in the world. Maybe in the end I will still leave a million things left undone and a thousand words left unsaid.
But it also means 5 years of being with my loved ones. 5 more years of memories, of hugs and kisses that I would have not been granted before. And maybe that’s not a lot and it may never be enough in the eyes of many. But too me it means everything. Because if being granted the chance I’d run back every time even if just for… solo un besito más.
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You kill me
You come to me in dreams these days.
You haunt my sleep and you leave me breathless.
 And I wake up torn and with immeasurable sadness.
Even hundreds of miles away, you still possess me.
And that kills me.
  You come to me in dreams these days.
In alternate universes you still torture me.
You still break me.
And I wake up with immeasurable pain.
Even in my solitude fortress you still tear at me.
And that kills me.
  You come to me in dreams these days.
You still have the power to slay me and eradicate me.
And I wake up distraught and with immeasurable fright.
Even in the still of night your presence still screams.
And that kills me.
  I don’t know how to escape you.
I don’t know where the exit is.
I don’t know why I let you.
Still touch me.
Still move me.
So please, baby, please let me let go.
Because I can’t live like this any longer.
Because I can’t pick up the pieces that you keep toppling over.
Because I can’t move on when you still chain me.
You still possess me.
You still torment me.
  You come to me in dreams these days.
And the hours of darkness seem endless.
And I get no rest from your lingering presence
And slowly but surely, you kill me.
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To heal a wound
So here we were, in between the four walls of my room. She sat in the chair in front of me, while I laid in bed propped up by pillows. She didn’t know this but I’d been one of my bad days where all I’d accomplish that day was to take a shower and then be depleted of all energy. As she sat there consumed by nervousness, fidgeting with her ring, all I could think about was how much actual physical pain I felt and how I couldn’t possibly take a pain killer because then I would never remember the conversation the next day. And this conversation was important.
And as awkward and uncomfortable as it all felt, there are some issues in our lives that we can’t sweep under a rug. That we cannot go around or even over, that we must cross from end to end. It’s part of the process, because as much as we want to, there are some things that we cannot assign to oblivion. Some pain demands to be felt.
We ran around the subject, talking of my health, and then her recent engagement. As much as it was needed, saying it out loud would be difficult. I explained to her that the only reason I hadn’t accepted to meet her sooner was that I wanted the conversation to be genuine. And that if I was going to offer forgiveness I didn’t want it to be fake in any way. So I had to go through the process, first, of reaching that place before I thought it appropriate to sit down with her and talk to her.
The last couple of months for me had been very difficult, it was one thing to be physically sick again, but then to also be in so much emotional turmoil. It all felt like an insidious cancer that was consuming me whole, and the worst part was not knowing if I was worth saving. So though she thought she needed this, I needed it most.
The conversation details themselves aren’t even important. It wasn’t about rehashing every detail, or over analyzing every single moment. It was about the realization of the hurt, of the aftermath created. It was about just being honest, about truly expressing remorse, and truly offering forgiveness. Because otherwise it was fictitious, unworthy, and a waste.
Betrayal will never be something easy to get over. Believe me, I’ve been wracked with both anger and an immense gradation of sadness. But forgiveness isn’t so much about relieving someone of their guilt as it is unshackling your pain. Grief can be a burden, but also an anchor, you get used to it. To how it holds you to place.
And that’s what many people in this world don’t get about forgiveness. It’s much more about the person wronged than the one that harmed. If we aren’t willing to give things their proper place in our past, we are just asking for them to spill all over our present. The truth is I can only handle one bad thing in my life and right now being physically sick is enough.
So I sat there and I listened, and she listened. I honestly didn’t know what my reaction to it all would be going forward. I prayed prior to this that I would only say what was really in my heart. And surprisingly, even to me, after it was said a calmness that I hadn’t felt in months came over me.
As I read her expressions I understood that she really did feel sorry. That it wasn’t an act. And once I was convinced it was all I ever needed to hear about the subject ever again.
The truth was that in the betrayal, she was what hurt the most. Him, I’d lost long ago, and I’d come to grips with. But she, she was someone I loved dearly, and it was hard to fathom my life without. When this all came to light someone wise said that if there was a friendship worth salvaging that with time and work it would be worth saving. At the time I thought they were idiots and that it was stupid because I could never trust someone like that again. But it is true. When you really love someone your willing to hang on even if you feel like your heart has had enough.
We all make mistakes, none of us are perfect, and truly loving and caring about someone is loving them through some of their worst of times. Because that’s when they need it the most. Because in the end that’s exactly what we hope others will do for us. I couldn’t possibly ever ask for forgiveness, for love or understanding if I wasn’t capable of granting it myself.
Elizabeth George said “The past can’t be changed can it? It can only be forgiven.” So I did. And with that we laid to rest the past. In its proper place, with its proper closure. Never to speak of it again. Because sometimes to heal a wound you simply need to stop touching it.  
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This too shall pass
"Your heart is like a great river after a long spell of rain, spilling over its banks. All signposts that once stood on the ground are gone, inundated and carried away by the rush of water. And still the rain beats down on the surface of the river. Every time you see a flood like that on the news you tell yourself: That’s it. That’s my heart. "  -- Haruki Murakami
I was 13 when I first got diagnosed with Clinical Depression. At the time I faced some emotional turmoil and loss, but since I only had the experience of a child I dealt with it all in a very self-destructing way. Depression will never be a one size fits all type of thing; for me personally it wasn’t so much the depth of sadness but the abyss of uncertainty that made me waiver.
The first 5-7 years were the worst. I would get on the medication and start feeling better so then I’d stop taking it only two fall down the pit even worse. And so began the vicious cycle time and time again. Thankfully I found solace in finding a great Psychologist Dr. Ramirez. She taught me so much about the illness and gave me the right tools to deal with depression. She helped me overcome the stigma I too had attached to depression. I knew there was something wrong with me, but admitting it, and even more so having to take actual medication for it seemed unnerving. She though gave me the perfect example to put me at ease. A person with Diabetes has to take Insulin because their bodies themselves aren’t producing enough. Well, it wasn’t much different for a person with depression, medically speaking the chemical imbalance in my brain made it necessary to take medication. It was that piece of information that helped me cope with the idea that I would be on medication my whole life.
But we live in an unforgiving society and at such a young age I didn’t want to be ostracized I just wanted to fit in, no matter the cost. So many times I would fake being okay just out of fear of not being accepted when in reality I was screaming inside for help. It was very hard to talk about. Hard to see the reaction in people’s faces, who would unknowingly twinge, as if I’d just handed them a grenade and they didn’t know what to do with it. So after a while I just stopped sharing.
My loved ones didn’t know what to do with me either. Saying you have a problem usually means recognizing there is a solution. But that’s the thing about depression it wasn’t a problem to resolve but an issue to endure. And you feel judged for showing very little signs of progression, as if you willingly wanted to live in this state always.
Winter have always been the hardest months for me. The lack of sunlight and vitamin D in your system create what is known as “winter depression”. During these months I know it doesn’t matter how much everything in my life is going great my spirit feels heavy and melancholy.
It’s taken me years to learn my triggers and finding the right concoction of medications. There were many high and low moments for me. But in a way I always felt frantic and restless like nothing I did was working. Until about 8 years ago when I was diagnosed with Anxiety disorder. Since the addition of that medication, my mood has leveled out entirely. Weeks or even months go by without feeling so distraught. I’ve learned that a lot of my emotional turmoil comes from over worrying and over analyzing what is going on in my life.
When I got physically sick in 2008 I went through a roller coaster of emotions. Even now today, as I’ve grown very ill in the last 6 month or so, it is a constant battle to keep my head above water. But years ago I made a promise to Jehovah, God, that if he would safe guard my heart and my thoughts I would take on the physical side of things and put all my strength into getting better.
It hasn’t been easy. These last couple of months have been incredible hard. I’ve been in and out of the hospital every couple of weeks and I’m on a lot of medication. I feel like I’m in a type of mental haze at all times which is also the reason I haven’t written in so long. It’s hard to put words together, even when you have a million of them. The doctors are a bit baffled and its becoming harder and harder to get my symptoms under control.
With the years I’ve learned that my illness is as much related to my stress level than anything else. Last year was a really hard year for me emotionally, so much betrayal happened that it threw me into the arms of despair. And once you’re clenched in her arms it’s hard to set yourself free.
In disillusionment of it all I’ve grown very numb and bitter. But it’s not even sadness that I feel. Honestly, I don’t think I could shed one single tear! But instead I look inside and all I see is this abyss of emptiness. This immeasurable depth of melancholy wretchedness that doesn’t help me at all to start feeling better. So my stress level is at an all-time high, making my physical health twice as bad.
I don’t know if I’m coming or going these days to be honest. My soul and being are tired. Breathing is excruciatingly painful. But it is said that you aren’t what’s happened to you, you are how you’ve overcome it. And I’ve come to learn that not all is lost. That with time, the tide will change. That if I look long enough at the horizon the sun will reappear. That if I hang in there long enough I’ll find solace in the known, in the familiar, once again.
And that even so, without a doubt, I will always be that girl, the girl who feels things in a much deeper level than just anyone. The girl who experiences everything with her heart on her sleeve no matter the state it is in. And that regardless of the trajectory this life catapults that girl towards there it will always be her belief that soon this too shall pass. 
"May happens to be Mental Health Awareness month. It is a vital month of instruction and insight into the lives of many who suffer from a mental illness. All in hopes that with education and empathy for one another we will unshackle ourselves from the stigmas that as a society we’ve attached to the uncertain, the different, and the unknown."
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This too shall pass
"Your heart is like a great river after a long spell of rain, spilling over its banks. All signposts that once stood on the ground are gone, inundated and carried away by the rush of water. And still the rain beats down on the surface of the river. Every time you see a flood like that on the news you tell yourself: That’s it. That’s my heart. "  -- Haruki Murakami
I was 13 when I first got diagnosed with Clinical Depression. At the time I faced some emotional turmoil and loss, but since I only had the experience of a child I dealt with it all in a very self-destructing way. Depression will never be a one size fits all type of thing; for me personally it wasn’t so much the depth of sadness but the abyss of uncertainty that made me waiver.
The first 5-7 years were the worst. I would get on the medication and start feeling better so then I’d stop taking it only two fall down the pit even worse. And so began the vicious cycle time and time again. Thankfully I found solace in finding a great Psychologist Dr. Ramirez. She taught me so much about the illness and gave me the right tools to deal with depression. She helped me overcome the stigma I too had attached to depression. I knew there was something wrong with me, but admitting it, and even more so having to take actual medication for it seemed unnerving. She though gave me the perfect example to put me at ease. A person with Diabetes has to take Insulin because their bodies themselves aren’t producing enough. Well, it wasn’t much different for a person with depression, medically speaking the chemical imbalance in my brain made it necessary to take medication. It was that piece of information that helped me cope with the idea that I would be on medication my whole life.
But we live in an unforgiving society and at such a young age I didn’t want to be ostracized I just wanted to fit in, no matter the cost. So many times I would fake being okay just out of fear of not being accepted when in reality I was screaming inside for help. It was very hard to talk about. Hard to see the reaction in people’s faces, who would unknowingly twinge, as if I’d just handed them a grenade and they didn’t know what to do with it. So after a while I just stopped sharing.
My loved ones didn’t know what to do with me either. Saying you have a problem usually means recognizing there is a solution. But that’s the thing about depression it wasn’t a problem to resolve but an issue to endure. And you feel judged for showing very little signs of progression, as if you willingly wanted to live in this state always.
Winter have always been the hardest months for me. The lack of sunlight and vitamin D in your system create what is known as “winter depression”. During these months I know it doesn’t matter how much everything in my life is going great my spirit feels heavy and melancholy.
It’s taken me years to learn my triggers and finding the right concoction of medications. There were many high and low moments for me. But in a way I always felt frantic and restless like nothing I did was working. Until about 8 years ago when I was diagnosed with Anxiety disorder. Since the addition of that medication, my mood has leveled out entirely. Weeks or even months go by without feeling so distraught. I’ve learned that a lot of my emotional turmoil comes from over worrying and over analyzing what is going on in my life.
When I got physically sick in 2008 I went through a roller coaster of emotions. Even now today, as I’ve grown very ill in the last 6 month or so, it is a constant battle to keep my head above water. But years ago I made a promise to Jehovah, God, that if he would safe guard my heart and my thoughts I would take on the physical side of things and put all my strength into getting better.
It hasn’t been easy. These last couple of months have been incredible hard. I’ve been in and out of the hospital every couple of weeks and I’m on a lot of medication. I feel like I’m in a type of mental haze at all times which is also the reason I haven’t written in so long. It’s hard to put words together, even when you have a million of them. The doctors are a bit baffled and its becoming harder and harder to get my symptoms under control.
With the years I’ve learned that my illness is as much related to my stress level than anything else. Last year was a really hard year for me emotionally, so much betrayal happened that it threw me into the arms of despair. And once you’re clenched in her arms it’s hard to set yourself free.
In disillusionment of it all I’ve grown very numb and bitter. But it’s not even sadness that I feel. Honestly, I don’t think I could shed one single tear! But instead I look inside and all I see is this abyss of emptiness. This immeasurable depth of melancholy wretchedness that doesn’t help me at all to start feeling better. So my stress level is at an all-time high, making my physical health twice as bad.
I don’t know if I’m coming or going these days to be honest. My soul and being are tired. Breathing is excruciatingly painful. But it is said that you aren’t what’s happened to you, you are how you’ve overcome it. And I’ve come to learn that not all is lost. That with time, the tide will change. That if I look long enough at the horizon the sun will reappear. That if I hang in there long enough I’ll find solace in the known, in the familiar, once again.
And that even so, without a doubt, I will always be that girl, the girl who feels things in a much deeper level than just anyone. The girl who experiences everything with her heart on her sleeve no matter the state it is in. And that regardless of the trajectory this life catapults that girl towards there it will always be her belief that soon this too shall pass. 
"May happens to be Mental Health Awareness month. It is a vital month of instruction and insight into the lives of many who suffer from a mental illness. All in hopes that with education and empathy for one another we will unshackle ourselves from the stigmas that as a society we’ve attached to the uncertain, the different, and the unknown."
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This too shall pass
"Your heart is like a great river after a long spell of rain, spilling over its banks. All signposts that once stood on the ground are gone, inundated and carried away by the rush of water. And still the rain beats down on the surface of the river. Every time you see a flood like that on the news you tell yourself: That’s it. That’s my heart. "  -- Haruki Murakami
I was 13 when I first got diagnosed with Clinical Depression. At the time I faced some emotional turmoil and loss, but since I only had the experience of a child I dealt with it all in a very self-destructing way. Depression will never be a one size fits all type of thing; for me personally it wasn’t so much the depth of sadness but the abyss of uncertainty that made me waiver.
The first 5-7 years were the worst. I would get on the medication and start feeling better so then I’d stop taking it only two fall down the pit even worse. And so began the vicious cycle time and time again. Thankfully I found solace in finding a great Psychologist Dr. Ramirez. She taught me so much about the illness and gave me the right tools to deal with depression. She helped me overcome the stigma I too had attached to depression. I knew there was something wrong with me, but admitting it, and even more so having to take actual medication for it seemed unnerving. She though gave me the perfect example to put me at ease. A person with Diabetes has to take Insulin because their bodies themselves aren’t producing enough. Well, it wasn’t much different for a person with depression, medically speaking the chemical imbalance in my brain made it necessary to take medication. It was that piece of information that helped me cope with the idea that I would be on medication my whole life.
But we live in an unforgiving society and at such a young age I didn’t want to be ostracized I just wanted to fit in, no matter the cost. So many times I would fake being okay just out of fear of not being accepted when in reality I was screaming inside for help. It was very hard to talk about. Hard to see the reaction in people’s faces, who would unknowingly twinge, as if I’d just handed them a grenade and they didn’t know what to do with it. So after a while I just stopped sharing.
My loved ones didn’t know what to do with me either. Saying you have a problem usually means recognizing there is a solution. But that’s the thing about depression it wasn’t a problem to resolve but an issue to endure. And you feel judged for showing very little signs of progression, as if you willingly wanted to live in this state always.
Winter have always been the hardest months for me. The lack of sunlight and vitamin D in your system create what is known as “winter depression”. During these months I know it doesn’t matter how much everything in my life is going great my spirit feels heavy and melancholy.
It’s taken me years to learn my triggers and finding the right concoction of medications. There were many high and low moments for me. But in a way I always felt frantic and restless like nothing I did was working. Until about 8 years ago when I was diagnosed with Anxiety disorder. Since the addition of that medication, my mood has leveled out entirely. Weeks or even months go by without feeling so distraught. I’ve learned that a lot of my emotional turmoil comes from over worrying and over analyzing what is going on in my life.
When I got physically sick in 2008 I went through a roller coaster of emotions. Even now today, as I’ve grown very ill in the last 6 month or so, it is a constant battle to keep my head above water. But years ago I made a promise to Jehovah, God, that if he would safe guard my heart and my thoughts I would take on the physical side of things and put all my strength into getting better.
It hasn’t been easy. These last couple of months have been incredible hard. I’ve been in and out of the hospital every couple of weeks and I’m on a lot of medication. I feel like I’m in a type of mental haze at all times which is also the reason I haven’t written in so long. It’s hard to put words together, even when you have a million of them. The doctors are a bit baffled and its becoming harder and harder to get my symptoms under control.
With the years I’ve learned that my illness is as much related to my stress level than anything else. Last year was a really hard year for me emotionally, so much betrayal happened that it threw me into the arms of despair. And once you’re clenched in her arms it’s hard to set yourself free.
In disillusionment of it all I’ve grown very numb and bitter. But it’s not even sadness that I feel. Honestly, I don’t think I could shed one single tear! But instead I look inside and all I see is this abyss of emptiness. This immeasurable depth of melancholy wretchedness that doesn’t help me at all to start feeling better. So my stress level is at an all-time high, making my physical health twice as bad.
I don’t know if I’m coming or going these days to be honest. My soul and being are tired. Breathing is excruciatingly painful. But it is said that you aren’t what’s happened to you, you are how you’ve overcome it. And I’ve come to learn that not all is lost. That with time, the tide will change. That if I look long enough at the horizon the sun will reappear. That if I hang in there long enough I’ll find solace in the known, in the familiar, once again.
And that even so, without a doubt, I will always be that girl, the girl who feels things in a much deeper level than just anyone. The girl who experiences everything with her heart on her sleeve no matter the state it is in. And that regardless of the trajectory this life catapults that girl towards there it will always be her belief that soon this too shall pass. 
"May happens to be Mental Health Awareness month. It is a vital month of instruction and insight into the lives of many who suffer from a mental illness. All in hopes that with education and empathy for one another we will unshackle ourselves from the stigmas that as a society we’ve attached to the uncertain, the different, and the unknown."
0 notes