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antimony-medusa · 11 months

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So Why Do I Keep Talking About Don't Like: Don't Read and Block And Move On?

So there are ships in my fandom that don't do it for me. There are characters who I do not like, there are tropes that make me grimace, there are relationship dynamics that I can't see any way that they could be delivered and still bring me any joy (in fact they actively make my day unpleasant). When I fill out my Do Not Want for exchanges, I have a BUNCH of stuff on that list. There's stuff in every fandom that I'm part of that makes me go "Oh boy that's a no from me". And my reaction to that is to ignore it. Block terms if necessary, unfollow people, just— leave it along. Don't like: don't read.

But why? Because that's not necessarily the fandom norm. This fandom definitely has a tendancy to actively go after stuff that it doesn't like. Especially on twitter, but I've seen it here too, especially when it comes to ships people don't like, or character takes they think are problematic, or creators they hate. Sending messages to warn people about other blogs, searching up the thing you don't like to hate on the people who post it, screenshotting the thing you hate or just talking about how bad it is so you can all be angry together. And man I just think that's a really bad idea.

The reason I think going after the thing you think is bad is a bad idea falls under two major headings. The first is what it does to you. Some of the things I don't like are just because they rub me the wrong way, or I think it's rude. But a good portion of the stuff I don't like is because it taps directly into some pretty serious stuff. If this is bringing up actual major trauma in my life, things I'm afraid of or bad things that happened, I do understand the desire to focus on it and the eraticate it. It's the same thing that makes you keep biting down on a painful tooth or poking at a painful eye. The thing hurts, so I give my attention to it. But oh boy, giving extra space in my head to the thing that is painful to me is not something that I should be doing lightly, and especially not in my recreational space. I see people being like "I hate this/this is bad because it's related to my trauma", but I can't overstate how bad of an idea it is to go "okay, this is terrible and related to my trauma, therefore I am going to search it up and focus on it and talk about it and share it with everyone I know. I'm going to make this traumatic thing a feature of my life".

You're just giving extra space in your head to the thing that hurts you. Don't give it that. Block the tags, ignore it, go full "I won't see it and I won't respond to it".

And even when it's just that I think something is rude, there's posting a careful post about the rudeness that you think some people might not have thought of and washing your hands of it (which is fine but like the amount of times I've started typing it and then gone "wait, everyone who follows me knows this, I don't have to post this, leave it along"), and then there's making it a feature of your blog to talk about how rude something is— why are you giving a slice of your precious life to the rudeness. Why are you giving them the spotlight? Why are you choosing to celebrate the worst things possible, and not the good things?

And then the other thing where I'm like— you're gonna see stuff you don't like, it is the internet, when you do so I'm begging you to just leave it be and walk away— is what it does to other people.

So I spent ten years on twitter. And in that time I have seen my fair share of hate mobs. Some of them are attacking legitimately horrible people. Some of them are completely misinformed and/or operating off of pure hatred. Some of them are attacking people over the most trivial things. But the thing is that with amost all of them, once they really started rolling, the impact they had was disproportionate to what anyone who was talking in good faith wanted. Someone would start a careful conversation about racism, and then people would go "oh, something I hate", and twelve hours later it's just several thousand people screaming over the original people who just wanted something to be fixed, and instead the person who fucked up is scared off the internet and being doxxed. Sometimes the original problem got fixed, but over half the times the person just closed down because they were being screamed at and learned nothing, and that's pulling from the situations where there was an actual problem to be fixed, and not misinformation or hatred or like, liking the wrong ship motivating things. And like, getting mobbed can really fuck someone up. People have had to check themselves into hospital and worse over this.

There's participating in someone saying "hey, this is fucked up", and that's something we should all do when it comes to matters of bigotry, but it's real important to be able to tell when a conversation is no longer being productive and is just about calling for someone's blood. Saying "hey, this trope plays into sexist stereotypes and you should be aware of it" is a great conversation to have. Attacking and mocking people who wrote the wrong trope does not actually increase the store of justice in the world.

And that's for things that you have a rational, principled reason for thinking is bad. A bunch of the time you just don't like a thing! And that's fine! You're allowed to not like things! But starting the ball of hatred rolling because you don't like things— oh in that case you do not have the moral high ground. You're just a bully.

Like at a certain point you have to start looking at matters of harm reduction, and going "I hate this ship, is calling everyone who likes it filthy degenerates actually going to make the world better, or is it going to make them feel bad and then double down, and nothing good happens". Or is it going to get even worse? Is it going to lead to a mob that causes in real world harm— people's housing or jobs impacted, or mental health, or worse! Sometimes it gets worse!

Sometimes a ship or trope you don't like can feel like a personal attack, but like, in the vast majority of cases, you're having an emotional reaction to something you don't like, you're not actually being harassed. You can feel like it's a good idea and even justified to strike back at this thing that is so bad, but like, in actuality it's just some words on a page someone wrote. Stabbing back at it is biting down on the injured tooth again, it's making things worse. Your best bet is to not give it power. Block terms, block users, ask the mods to not match you with certain people or ships, unfollow people— walk away. Don't spend time on it. Ignore it and focus on something good.

Engaging with things you hate is bad for you, and it's bad for the people around you, and way too much of the time it's disproportionately bad for the people who like the thing you hate. So I'm all in on Block And Move On, and Don't Like: Don't Read.

#discourse #fandom meta

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thirstystarkey · 4 years

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HATE CAN SOUND LIKE LOVE • JJ MAYBANK

Summary: JJ and Y/N have always fought, since everyone can remember. They both have short tempers and a endless love for surf and chaos. But what happens when they have to pretend to be a couple? Well.. people always said that hate can sound like love sometimes.

Warnings: Mention of underage drinking, drugs, minor violence, some smutty scenarios and a ton of sexual induendos, JJ being a hot idiot and Y/N a wild girl brat

CHAPTER 20

Ever since that night JJ paid much more attention to Y/N, like he couldn’t get enough of her. Y/N felt it too, seemed like something changed deep inside of her, she wanted JJ but the fear of JJ leaving her as soon as they got physical also haunted her because almost every guy she knew did the same, they always left and for the first time Y/N didn’t want JJ to leave, she wanted to be involved in the chaotic mess his life was so much that she didn’t even remember the deal of pretending to be a fake couple to piss the pogues.

“Did you hear anything I said?” Kiara snapped her fingers in front of her, getting her attention.

“What?” Y/N asked confused. Her mind roamed since the beginning of the conversation.

“She was thinking about banging JJ.” Sarah laughed pushing Y/N back.

“Stop!” Y/N whined feeling her cheeks turn red. Sarah was right, that was the only think Y/N thought in the last few days. “What did you said Kiara?” Y/N added, turning to Kiara.

“I said a lot of things miss.” Her friends teased. “But I was talking about the party, tonight. At John B’s chateau, to celebrate JJ being out of jail.” Kiara explained for the second time.

“Ohh.” Y/N said. “I’ll be there of course.” She laughed.

“Planning on disappearing with JJ?” Kiara asked slyly.

“I’m not telling anything!” Y/N laughed.

They spent their afternoon like together enjoying some girl quality time before it was time to head to John B’s where the boys were and the other pogues of the island.

The house was full and red cups started to appear all over, some knocked over and others just left in the ground. A fire was lit in the backyard keeping everyone warm and creating a cozy atmosphere. Everyone sang and danced to crappy music having the time of their lives away from the kooks.

“Y/N!” John B screamed. “You will love this next song!” She laughed turning Criminal by Britney Spears on.

JJ let his head fall backwards as he smoked one blunt laughing at the choice of song. He had his arms around Y/N shoulders who sat in the middle of his legs.

“I swear to god John B!” Y/N tried to be serious but eventually she cracked laughing.

“But mama I'm in love with a criminal and this type of love isn't rational, it's physical!” Pope sang along with Kiara, already drunk.

Once the song was over the attention dispersed from Y/N and JJ to other things around them, which Y/N was grateful for since every time some looked at them she knew they were questioning themselves about the strange bound formed by the enemies.

“Wanna go somewhere else?” JJ asked, getting Y/N attention who eagerly nodded her head yes making him giggle. “C’mon lets go.” He held her hand, steeping away from the fire discretely.

Once they were away from the crowd of drunk teenagers JJ signed pushing Y/N against him by her hips. He looked down before kissing her lips in a sweet slow shared kiss who left Y/N panting when they broke it off for air. Her hands were planted on his chest carressing his skin through the fabric.

“I got a surprise for you.” JJ whispered in her lips.

“What?” Y/N asked through a bright smile.

“It’s inside.” JJ said with a slight smile, curving his lips upwards.

“John B locked the house.” Y/N laughed.

“And I got the keys right here.” He got the keys from his back pocket, swinging the shine metal in front of her.

“You never learn.” Y/N mocked pushing him away.

JJ unlocked the door, making sure he locked it once they were inside so no drunk teenager would step inside and mess everything. He grabbed Y/N’s hand and pulled her into his room giggling in the process.

“What’s going on JJ?” Y/N asked curious with all the mystery.

“A surprise Y/N!” JJ whined looking for something in his room, she sat on his bed waiting for him.

Once JJ got what he was searching for he showed Y/N another pair of keys, this time boat keys, making her even more confused.

“You stole a boat?” Y/N said arching her brow.

“Oh my god, no!” JJ laughed sitting beside her. “I borrowed it okay! I wanna take you out tomorrow, just us and the open ocean. We can even go to that abandoned island.” He suggested proudly watching her face light up. “I realized I never actually took you out in a proper date so I thought of this. Do you like it?” JJ asked afraid of rejection.

“JJ I fucking love this!” Y/N said excited while she threw herself at the blond boy, hugging his broad shoulders. “I’m so happy, I can’t wait for tomorrow JJ.” Y/N whispered into his neck, smirking as his skin got goosebumps.

“I will protect you from the sharks.” He joked pulling Y/N into his lap, both legs around his thighs.

Y/N had a big smile on her face as she pulled away from his shoulders, looking at his features before she caressed his bruised cheek, placing loving kisses all over them.

“JJ, I’m extremely grateful.” She whispered in his lips before kissing them slowly. “So, so grateful.” JJ had a smile on his lips as she whispered the words kissing him immediately after in a playfully manner.

“You can show me tomorrow how grateful you are.” JJ said lowly sending shivers down her spine, winking after.

Y/N laughed pushing his chest back which made JJ fall into the pillows, he had a slight smirk on his lips watching her from beneath her as Y/N lowered herself down on him, until his chest was pressed against hers. Her hands played with his hair sometimes pulling on it which made JJ breath heavily.

His hands traveled down her spine to her hips, surrounding her figure in a tight grip that made Y/N let out a breathy moan.

“You look gorgeous tonight.” He said kissing her naked shoulder since the strap of her dress fell a bit. “You look so so good, I couldn’t stop looking at you out there.” He admited moving his hands underneath her dress as he dragged his digits through her soft skin squeezing her ass.

Y/N moaned at the touch, pulling away from his lips. Her hair fell around their hands, creating almost a golden dome due to the light from outside contrasting with her ginger hair.

“You can look all you want now.” She whispered sultry.

“Fuck..” JJ whined to himself, sitting up against the headboard securing her back.

Tag list 💞

@thatsonobx @starkeybaby @this-is-bigger-than--us @tomzfrog @alotbnouf @jj-maybank-stan @jellyfishbeansontoast @rafecamerondeservesbetter @tomfreakinghollandneedsaoscar @tembo-ndoto @poguebx @k-k0129 @kieinred @obxmxybxnk @lcil123 @fandom-phaser @sexualparkour @myrandom-fandomlife @lasnaro @sw-eat-ing @kiarascarreras @jjswhore @milamaybank @downbytheouterbanks @write-from-the-heart @justcallmesams @annedub @drizzlethatfalls @tovvaf @drewswannabegirl @whoreforouterbanks @newhopenessie @maybebanks @poguesrforlife @shawnssongs @wastedheartcth @rudyypankow @danicarosaline @sc4rlettm @hufflepeople @punkrainbows @obliviatevamps @trustfundparker @annoylinglyaries @sexytholland @5am-cigarette @majoroof @ilovejjmaybank @aheadfullofskies @jjmeybank

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askthesnake · 4 years

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Hey m8, I have an idea for a comic (I've already designed the characters and have a blog for it but I don't know how to start it or get people to see it, and I'm not really confident in my art skills. Any advice?

Of course!

Lets look at what you've accomplished! You have the characters and the basic story figured out! That's a great start and honestly it's one of the hardest things to do when you're starting a comic.

As for getting people to actually see and interact with your comic, for Tumblr its all about the tags. Depending on what type of comic it is can sort of help you decide which tags to use. So for example if its web comic do stuff like #webcomic or maybe the genre of the comic can help too.

If its a comic for a fandom you're also pretty set too. Character tags are always pretty buzzing with people looking for fresh content. Just be respectful and responsible and don't tag characters that don't have Any thing to do with your work. Like for example, when I first started this blog, I included tags for ALL the sides, despite the fact that in the beginning my asks only had Deceit featured in them. Thankfully I didn't get hounded for it and I learned eventually, but either way just be responsible about tagging.

Oh while we're still on tagging, if your comic has some thing potentially triggering remember to tag that appropriately. Like for blood #tw blood or #blood mention as an example.

As for your art style and lack of confidence there of, just know you're definitely not alone. I've met a plethora of artists and I can confidently say none of them are truly ever happy or confident with their work. Even now I find myself looking at work I've done like a few days ago and wretching. I can however positively tell you that running this ask blog/comic has SIGNIFICANTLY improved my art style in at least half the time it would have taken normally. Its because im drawing constantly and always trying new things to make the art for this blog more appealing to new viewers. Running a comic is a fantastic way to better your art and gain confidence in it. Like yeah im not always super happy with what I post here, but looking back at stuff I've in the past compared to some of the stuff I've put on this blog honestly kinda boosts my confidence as am artist. Not to mention it really high lights where you've improved and where you still need to work on things. Personally I like your art style!! I got your Deceit drawing and I think it's wonderful! You're really not as bad as you think you are, and personally I think you've got a pretty strong style to start with.

I guess my next piece of advice is, to put it simply, never under any circumstances take shit from others. Do not let people's words and comments discourage you. Ever. Its much easier said than done I know, and even now I can't really give you any advice on how to avoid such things. The best I can do is warn you. I've had personal friends make fun of me for running this blog and like honestly that hurts differently. I made this blog when I was going through a very eye opening and dark time in my life, so naturally it means a whole lot to me. This blog was and still very much is a safe place for me to run too. There are going to be people who aren't going to understand that unfortunately and I really wasn't prepared for it. So hear this, be prepared for shitty people to rag on you for doing some thing that makes you happy. Im not saying it WILL happen, just be prepared just in case. Also on a similar note ignore anon hate. I think during my year with this blog I've only gotten one anon hate message, and it wasn't even that bad?? It was someone commenting on my chubby Logan post. Whatever, literally ignore the hell out of anon hate. People who take time out of there to bully someone on this godforsaken website aren't worth your time.

But, if anon hate does get to you, always know that you can talk to someone. My askbox and dms are always open if someone wants to talk or vent. People are assholes, and sometimes if you gotta vent you gotta vent.

Also, don't ever let your comic and blog impede your mental health. If you're feelin bad you're feelin bad. Remember to drink water and stay hydrated. Then again, if drawing is how you cope, then by all means draw your heart out you funky lil artist.

Finally, don't be afraid to reblog your own stuff. I do it, I know other art tumblrs who do it. You're gonna feel bad and annoying about doing it, but just do it man. It's not bad or wrong. I live on the west coast, historically Ive been known to post my art at like 12-4 am. Once like noon hits where I'm at I'll reblog my own art just to make sure everyone saw it, and then I'll reblog it again at some random time the next day just because.

Also, a small secret about this blog, I sent the first ask to this blog. I literally logged off this blog, hopped on my old tumblr and sent an ask to this blog. Its a pretty easy way to show people that your blog is Up and Running. Im not sure what kind of comic your making, but if its an interactive one like a web comic and you're not getting any asks, then there is no shame in doing this.

#long post

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une-femme-de-lettres · 7 years

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Hey, love ur blog, I'm thinking of creating a blog for fics and was wondering if you had any advice for a new writer? xx

First, thank you so much! :)

And second, oh my Gosh, I’ve never been asked thatbefore and I’m kind of new on Tumblr too so I don’t really know what to say butI’m gonna do my best. All these tips and advice are the things I learned from mypersonal experience as a writer on Tumblr

(Future me: okay, it turned out that I actuallyhad a LOT of things to say so sorry in advance for the long-ass reply…)

So first there are two sides to running awriting blog on Tumblr: the writing and the blogging.

Number one and most important is of coursethe writing part and for this I have a few pieces of advice to give. I can’t guaranteeyou that ALL these tips will work for you because it depends on you and the wayyou work, you sometimes have to start from there and figure out what works foryou. But again, these is what I figured out from my personal experience:

First advice: read. Like, when I say ‘read’,I mean ‘read A LOT’. You might already be doing that and keep it up, becausereading is what got me into writing in the first place and what allowed me to builda rich vocabulary and overall develop my writing skills (my literature classhelped me a little with that too…) That may be obvious but reading in thelanguage you want to write in is especially important if it’s not your nativelanguage (for example my native language is French but fanfiction helped meimprove hugely my English and now Ionly write in English.)

Again something that might be obvious butthe key is writing about what you like/love. Whether it’s a show, a book or amovie, if you love its story, characters and universe, it’ll be easier to writeabout it. And it’s very common for people to like a show/book/movie for like ayear and then they’re not so much interested in it anymore. And that’s totallyfine, don’t force yourself, if you don’t like the show/book/movie you’rewriting your fic for anymore, move on and focus on what you like.

Also, if you like a show or a movie forexample, and you want to write about it: watch it and re-watch it. This is howyou’re gonna get to know the characters you’re working with and get the overallfeel and atmosphere of the show/movie. And if it’s a book, reading it severaltimes will help you, unconsciously, replicate the author’s style. My examplehere is Supernatural. I spent two and a half months binge-watching the show andit is so long that I don’t really need to re-watch it. At the end, when I wasready and eager to start writing fics for this show, I had spent so much timewatching its characters (mostly Sam and Dean) that I was able to predict howthey would react to certain events and how they would speak and move during a scene.

That brings me to the next advice, whichis, if you don’t really know how to start writing, start with the dialogs (ifthere are some in your work of course). I’m gonna take my previous examplehere. Now that I’m done with Supernatural, all this character/atmosphere thingis in my head and when I’m writing, I’m literally picturing the scene, thecharacters and the dialogs as if I’m watching an episode. But sometimes you canhave this in mind but still not know how to start. That’s when the dialogs comein handy. When I’m in this situation and I have the whole scene pictured in myhead, I first write the dialogs, with an indication of who is talking, like ascript. Then around that, I start writing literally every character’s actionsand movements, then their feelings and thoughts. You don’t have to break itdown like that because once you’ve started writing something, if you’re feelinggood, you’re not gonna want to stop.

Another advice is just to write your ideasas they come. And when you have an idea, don’t let it go and write in somewhereto remember it. Keep a note book close to you so you can write in it at everymoment, especially when you’re lying in bed at night, trying to sleep. That’swhen most of my ideas and inspiration come so keep something to write your ideaon ‘cause trust me, you won’t remember it the next morning…

Also, regarding this whole idea thing: don’tforce yourself to work on one single thing if it’s not the way you like to work.By doing that you’re keeping yourself from doing what you actually would liketo do. And in the end it will prevent you from actually working on that singlething, because you won’t stop thinking about something else. So don’t be afraidto work on a few projects at a time and when you don’t feel like working onone, work on another one.

BUT, sometimes following this advice andworking on too much things at a time can cause complete chaos with unfinishedseries and barely started one-shots, trust me I know what I’m talking about… Soto help with that, you can set priorities, whether they’re based on thepopularity of a work or the time you started writing it. Telling yourself ‘thisstory is important, I have to work on it’ will either help you getting to actuallywork on it or making you realize you don’t want to work on this one, thuspushing you to write the thing you actually want to write.

And finally, there’s the problem of notknowing what to write and just not ‘wanting’ to write. If really your brain issaying ‘nah, I don’t wanna write, I just wanna stare at the blank page and theblinking cursor for the rest of the day’ but your heart is actually saying ‘butI want to write, I have so many good ideas.’ In that case, you have to forceyourself a little, because the hardest part is getting started. To fight this,set yourself a writing goal, like writing at least 500 words a day (that’s whatI do), I don’t guarantee it’ll work but it’s worth the try.

Okay, that was the –long-ass- first andmost important part, now it’s time to tackle the number two: blogging part. Inthat part, I’ll give you some tips to get known on Tumblr and build an audience.Once again, I’m not guaranteeing you that you’ll become famous by following thesebecause the biggest part of building and keeping your audience is your work (ifpeople like it, they’ll keep coming back for more).

With that out of the way, my first adviceis having an accessible blog. What I mean by that is that if people can easilynavigate through your blog and find your work, they’ll be more likely to wantto say and read more. Hence the critical importance of having a functioning Masterlist,for both desktop AND mobile (a good part of people is using Tumblr mobile toread). On desktop, you can make your Masterlist by creating a page that willshow under your description text on your blog. But that doesn’t work on the mobileapp so what you will want to do is create a Masterpost, which is basically atext post with your Masterlist in it. With this though you’ll have to reblog itregularly so it shows up on your feed and is quickly findable and accessible.

Your Masterlist will have to feature everyone of your works and also make people that are new on your blog want to readthese works. To do that, you Masterlist must be clear and organized. You cancategorize your works, list them in different and well-defined categories tohelp the read spot what stories they’re interested in.

When you list a work, you must first writeits title and put a link to its corresponding post (you can use the title andmake it clickable so it will bring the reader to this specific work). You alsohave to make it easy for the reader to identify what the story will be about,so that they can decide whether or not they want to read it. To do that, youcan write a quick summary next to the title and even add a few tags that detailfor example the pairing featured in the work, the genre of the work (is itangsty, fluffy, smutty?) or the its length (is it part of a series, is it aone-shot?) you can also indicate the approximate word count. And of mostimportantly you can specify the warnings, if there are any (graphic violence,explicit sexual content?) so the reader knows what to expect and if it’ssomething they don’t want to read, they don’t have to click the link and waitfor the page to charge to find out.

Talking about tags, you can and have to usethe tagging system on your posts so that your works are easily sortable andaccessible through the search function. That way, the reader can pick and find exactlywhat they want to read. Keep in mind that the more accessible your work is, thequicker readers will be able to find what they want and the more they’ll wantto read.

So now, the main issue is getting people toactually come to your blog. You can always rely on the Tumblr recommendationsbut I don’t think many people actually see/take time to go through them. So myadvice for that is like reading to write: follow to be followed. The more blogsyou follow, the better (to a certain extant). Let’s take an example, if youwrite for the Supernatural fandom, you certainly already follow Supernaturalthemed blogs. Not everyone does that but I do: when someone follows me, and ifI see in their description that they write, I’m gonna want to go and see whatthey have and if I like their work, I’m gonna follow them and maybe reblog afew of their works and my audience will maybe want to read more and follow themas well, and so on.

There is also a few blogs on Tumblr thatsometimes ask for more blogs to follow. The more blog you follow yourself, themore you’re likely to encounter this type of posts. Then you have to seize theopportunity. Don’t be ashamed to self-promote if your blog corresponds to theirarea of interest (they asked for it after all LOL…). You won’t be botheringthem if you reblog the post and link them to your Masterlist, that’s actuallywhat they want, and again, if your work is easy to find and they like it, they’llfollow…

By now, you may have got it, the key togetting known on Tumblr is interaction with other people. And the last advice I’llgive you is related to challenges. Writing challenges are a big thing on Tumblrand it allows writers to share their work on a larger scale, as many biggerblogs do these kind of challenges. So it’s another great way to get people tonotice you and it’s also a really fun thing to do.

To conclude I’d say that you have to bepatient, don’t be too greedy and don’t expect too many people to express theirlove and enjoyment, at least at first. They don’t always let you know, but ifpeople like your work and if you put effort into it, your audience will grow byitself and you will eventually get the recognition you deserve.

And most importantly, enjoy yourself. Iknow it can be frustrating working for hours on something, posting it and notgetting any feedback. But don’t forget that, first and foremost, you write foryourself, because you enjoy it and because you love sharing your ideas withother people. And remember that, in the end, your most fervent supporter isyourself.

#writing tips #new writers on tumblr #personal experience

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