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#pope heyward
lunar-writing · a year ago
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Word Count: 4.6k+ (oops?)
JJ Maybank x Female!Reader
Warning: NSFW 18+, basically all smut, all main characters are aged up to 18+, this is fairly kinky so if that isn’t your style pls look away, swearing, dirty talk, teasing, oral (female receiving), fingering, rough sex, praise kink, slight breeding kink, pet names, dom!jj, unprotected sex (don’t be silly wrap your willy)
Summary: jj is typically the one known for being horny 24/7 so now this is just basically the reader being horny like all of us
A/N: haha hi,,, so i’m finally writing on here! i’ve written before and for a while but i have never written smut before so please don’t be too harsh on this! i’m very nervous to post this just because i’ve been feeling insecure about my writing lately and it is my first smut imagine, but i hope everyone likes it!! the ending ended up being softer than i thought lmao but it’s still cute :)
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You twiddle your thumbs in your lap in an attempt to remain distracted. You were currently sitting by the fire in the backyard of the chateau. Music and chatter was heard through the backyard and probably the rest of the block. The pogues decided it was time to have another kick-back after a week of doing almost nothing but smoking and surfing. It was only meant to be for a small group and some people from around the cut but word spread fast and now most of the local teens and other college students were in John B’s backyard throwing a full blown party.
Typically you would be into the scene and having a good time with your friends, but your mind was only focused on one thing: JJ. He sat next to you at the fire while mindlessly laughing along with whatever was being said by the other people sat around the fire. To say you woke up that morning with a need only your boyfriend could fix was an understatement. Your mind had been on him all day. From when you saw him walking out of the water on the beach only in his swim trunks, to lingering kisses and casual dirty remarks you’re used to hearing from the blonde, it all built up into wanting him and a growing wet spot in your panties.
You leaned forward, picking up the bottle of beer you placed on the ground earlier and took and sip from it. The bottle not moving far from your lips once you swallowed, stuck in a hazy state while staring into the fire. “Hey, you okay?”
Your attention turned toward your boyfriend. He had his head turned to look at you with a sweet smile placed on his lips. Your eyes scanned over his face, taking in the way the light from the fire illuminated his features. He was utterly breathtaking. He always looked so ruggedly handsome at all times, and right now it wasn’t helping your situation. Ignoring the tingly feeling in your lower abdomen becoming more intense, you gave him a tightlipped smile back. “Yeah! Just not feeling in the party mood, I guess.” You knew that wasn’t true, but you could spare yourself the embarrassment of letting him know how bad you needed him and just wait until he made the first move when you left the party, right?
“Are you sure?” JJ pressed further, not knowing whether or not if he believed you just yet. You were about to respond with the same reaffirmation when you felt something land on your leg. You looked down seeing JJ’s hand placed on the bare skin of your thigh. You knew it was meant as a reassuring and comforting gesture, but with how you have been feeling and the thoughts of him above you running around in the back of your mind, seeing and feeling his hand on your thigh caused your breath to hitch.
Your eyes snapped back up to his in hopes that he didn’t see your moment of weakness. “Uh,” you stuttered out, noticing the look of realization slowly spread across his face. “Just not in the party mood, like I said.” You cleared your throat, hoping he would buy your cheap excuse and the growing smirk on his face was just your eyes playing tricks on you.
“Not in the party mood?” He asked back, smirk etched on his face. You hummed in agreement before turning your head back toward the fire, wishing he would drop the subject for now. You thought he did forget about it for a second, but feeling his breath suddenly against your ear and his thumb beginning to rub circles into your thigh told you a different story. “Then what kind of mood are you in, sugar?” You let out a breathy sigh as your head turned to look at him. His face was now right in front of yours, staring back at you with a sly smirk. Your reaction to his comment and dilated pupils were all that he needed to confirm his suspicions. He caught you. “C’mere.” He said, grabbing your hand and pulling you up from where you previously sat.
JJ began to pull you in the direction of the chateau, you following close behind him. You looked around slightly embarrassed that your boyfriend wasn’t being discreet about bringing you inside, but luckily no one noticed a thing. The random people sitting around the fire continued on with their conversation while new teens took your previous seats. Your friends were off doing god knows what, so that left only you and JJ knowing what was about to happen.
The blonde led you through the house and into the spare bedroom that the two of you practically claimed as yours. You stood watching as JJ closed the door and locked it. You knew only the pogues were allowed in the chateau, but in the off chance one of them came to use the bathroom or someone came wandering in, JJ didn’t want to take the risk of someone seeing you in a way only he was allowed to.
Your boyfriend turned back toward you, flashing yet another cheeky smirk as he walked toward you. Despite having had sex with him many times before, your heart rate and breathing picked up in response to how he he was looking at you. He always had something about him that made your skin crawl with anticipation each time you stepped into the bedroom, and this time was no different.
He stopped right in front of you, his chest pressed lightly against your own. Your head tilted up to look him in the eyes. The blonde towered over you, eyes connecting with your own. One of his hands found itself on your waist, the other coming up to brush your hair behind your ear. A soft gasp escaped your lips when his fingers moved to cup the side of your jaw. On instinct you pressed yourself fully against the front side of his body. Eyes flicking to his lips, he slowly leaned down. Your hand placed itself on top of the one cupping your jaw, the other gripping his bicep. His lips brushed against yours, causing your eyes to flutter closed. Feeling his lips lightly pressed against your own and his body so close to you made you feel lightheaded. After a day full of longing for his touch, nearly having what you wanted left your skin tingling as if it were on fire, but it still left you wanting more.
“Kiss me.” You mumbled against his lips. In almost an instant his lips were fully pressed against yours. You sighed in content from finally feeling his lips against yours. Your hand that rested on his bicep instinctively coming up to hold onto his shoulder. His lips moved slowly against yours, lingering for a second before pulling away. The kiss was short, but despite it being satisfying it left you needing more and feeling needier than before. You tried to reconnect your lips back to JJ’s but he swiftly pulled his head back. You pouted, pushing your body even more into his if it were possible. “JJ.” You whimpered, looking down at his lips and then back to his eyes.
“What, baby?” He questioned innocently, ghosting his fingers down your neck. You shivered at the feeling, eyes closing briefly in pleasure before opening once again.
“You know what.” You sighed, your head tilting to the side slightly as a way of giving him more space to run his fingers across your skin.
JJ smirked at your reaction. He took pride in seeing you already begin to fall apart at his fingertips with barely touching you. Of course he figured out you had been way more than ready for him longer than he knew of, and for that he wanted to hear you tell him everything. “Say it.” He said. His fingers coming to run through your hair as you looked up at him through hooded eyes.
A blush spread across your cheeks, feeling the heat spread throughout your body and face. Normally it wasn’t as hard for you to talk during your intimate moments, but with that way he was looking at you and the feeling of utter need coursing through your veins, you were at a loss for words. A soft smile formed on JJ’s lips realizing just how needy and helpless you were. He’s never seen you like this and he was enjoying every second of it. “Don’t be shy now, sugar. You know I’ll take care of you.”  
A soft whimper left your lips as he backed you up toward the bed. You shuffled your way back onto the mattress, stopping with your head hovering above the pillows. You propped yourself up on your elbows, watching as JJ stepped next to the bed. His eyes never left yours while he stripped off his shirt and kicked off his shoes. You bit your lip staring at his built form. He knew what he was doing to you, and you didn’t know whether to thank him or curse him for it. The only thing you did know was that his now shirtless torso was making the aching feeling in your lower area become more intense. Your thighs instinctively began to rub together in an attempt to relieve some of the pressure that was still growing stronger inside of you.
Your actions didn’t last long though. JJ grabbed your legs and pulled them apart from each other. He slipped off your shoes before settling on his knees in between your legs. He looked over your body while his hands ran up the sides of your thighs, leaving goosebumps in the wake of his touch. His eyes trailed up until they reconnected with your own. The look of you leaning back on your elbows while looking at him with pleading eyes was a sight that he would never forget. His hands travelled past your hips and up to your chest, pushing you back to fully lay on the bed. You complied and lied back against the pillows as your boyfriend hovered over you. He situated himself so his arms were holding part of his weight up, but still allowing himself to be pressed up against you. His hips were in line with yours, and although they weren’t moving, just the feeling of them against your own was already making it harder for you to control the need growing in your body.  
One hand of his slipped into your own, placing your arm by the side of your head. JJ peppered your jaw and neck with light kisses until he had you squirming under him. The feeling of getting what you wanted but nearly enough driving you crazy and he knew that. It wasn’t until he felt you buck your hips up against his and whimper did he know just how crazy he was making you. “JJ, please.” You let out a whine. Soon enough his lips detach from your neck as he moves to look you in the eye, hovering over you.
“Awe, sugar.” He cooed in a soft voice. His voice is almost similar to that of a mocking tone. “I’ll give you anything you want, you just have to tell me.” JJ leaned down nibbling on your bottom lip softly, before pulling away.
You mewled softly at his action, disappointed it didn’t last any longer. “JJ,” You began. You didn’t know what to say. You wanted everything he could give you. Seeing him stare deeply into your eyes waiting for a response, your mind could only come up with one thing to say. “Make me yours.” You moaned, arching your back up to push yourself further into the blonde’s embrace.  
A flash of surprise shined in JJ’s eyes at your words, clearly not expecting you to say such a thing, but it was quickly replaced by lust. A growl left his throat as he pressed his lips back on yours. This time the kiss was full of passion and lust. It was messy and needy and left you shivering from the intensity you were met with. You greeted his tongue as it slipped into your mouth, taking complete control over the kiss as well as your body.
A rather loud moan escaped your mouth when JJ moved his lips to connect to the sweet spot on your neck. He was no longer leaving teasing kisses but instead sucking and nipping at the delicate skin. You brought the hand that wasn’t already holding his to comb through his hair and urge him to continue the assault on your neck. Your legs came to wrap around his waist and head pushing back into the pillows to give JJ more access to do as he pleased. The way he was sucking and lapping at your neck, you knew there were going to be marks tomorrow but the idea of it made you excited and if possible, more turned on.
JJ trailed his lips down to the base of your neck, softly nipping at the skin. Wanting to test the waters and see how you’d react, he gently bit down on your skin. A loud moan erupted from your throat, gripping almost harshly on his hair as a sign of wanting more. He smirked at your eagerness and positive response, licking and biting down on the other side of your neck. You mewled at the feeling, a high-pitched whine sounding from your lips. “Fuck, JJ.” Your body squirmed underneath his, the heat flowing through your body becoming more intense with every action of his.
Letting go of your hand, JJ sat up, still in between your legs. “Sit up.” He demanded. You complied almost instantly, following suit and sitting up. His hands went to grab the hem of your shirt, tugging it upward. You got the hint and raised your arms for the blonde to strip the shirt off of you. He threw the material somewhere on the floor, reaching down to start grabbing at the button on your shorts. “Take your bra off.” He said while undoing your jean shorts. You reached your hands around your back, unclasping your bra and throwing it on the floor as well. You let out a squeal as your body quickly slid forward in response to JJ nearly ripping off your shorts in a hurry.
Before you knew it, you were left in just your underwear with JJ’s lips crashing back into your own. The force from the kiss and JJ’s body pushed you back down on the bed, never breaking his lips apart from yours. His body was pressed against yours once again, this time the feeling of his skin directly on yours nearly driving you to your tipping point. JJ’s lips trailed down your body once again, leaving sloppy kisses and bites on his way. He stopped shortly at your breasts, sucking and nipping at your erect nipples. Breathy whimpers and moans never cease from your mouth as his lips trailed lower down your body. JJ stopped right above the hem of your panties. His lips skimmed over the skin right above, earning several unapproving whines from you.
You looked down, seeing his eyes looking right back at you with a smirk on his face. You opened your mouth to say something to him but the only thing that came out was a moan as he sucked right on your hip bone. JJ’s smirk returned to his lips as his face hovered right above your cloth-covered core. His hands giving featherlight touches on your thighs as he pressed a kiss to your cloth covered clit. Your eyes shut in pleasure, feeling some sort of touch against the part of you that has been aching all day. JJ’s voice made your eyes snap open once again. “You’re so wet. Who’s all of this for?” JJ beamed up at you, pressing his face closer to your covered center.
“You, JJ.” You let out a breathy moan, trying hard not to buck your hips up into him.
“You what?” JJ asked as if he didn’t know the answer. His fingers gripping the sides of your panties and sliding it down your legs.
You sighed as your panties came off, finally. JJ settled back in between your legs, face close to your core again. His eyes locked with yours again and raised an eyebrow waiting for your answer. “I’m wet for you, JJ.” Satisfied with your answer, JJ leaned fully in, licking a long stipe up your center. “JJ!” You almost cried out, head falling back against the pillows once again.
JJ repeated the action, lapping at your core for a few seconds before finding your sweet bundle of nerves with his lips. Sucking harshly at the already sensitive nub, you let out a strangled cry as your hands went flying to the blonde’s hair. He had only just started giving you the attention you needed and you were already lost in pleasure. JJ’s hands came to hold at the top of your thighs as a way of holding you in place while his tongue went to work. His tongue circled and sucked on your clit, stopping to dip into your entrance every now and then. You were a moaning and writhing mess underneath JJ, and you loved every second of it.
“I don’t think I’m going to last long.” You managed to moan out, already feeling the fire in the pit of your stomach growing stronger and the pleasure from your core becoming more intense. It had only been about a minute since he started but you couldn’t hold off the inevitable high that was creeping up on you. You lifted your head to look down at JJ, your eyes immediately meeting his. Seeing him staring back at you, head between your thighs as he lapped at your heat like it was his favorite thing to eat, you felt the coil in your stomach begin to tighten. “Fuck, I’m gonna cum.” You whined, feeling your stomach twist tighter to right on the brink of pleasure. Suddenly, two of JJ’s fingers plunged into your dripping core and curling right into the sweet spot inside of you. You let out a scream as your orgasm crashed down on you quicker than you expected, waves of pleasure pulsing through your body.
Your back arched off of the bed as you rode out your high, eyes rolling back at the overwhelming feeling of JJ’s mouth sucking on your clit and now fingers pumping it and out of you. He pulled his mouth away once the last bits of your orgasm flowed through your body. He sat back on his heels and you expected him to take his fingers out as well but he kept going. It was a moderate pace, but with your body being sensitive from your orgasm it felt almost too much.
Opening your eyes, you looked at JJ whose face shimmered from your slick and cum. Noticing you recuperating from your previous orgasm, he smirked before moving his fingers faster inside of you.
You let out another strangled moan at the feeling. “JJ, I’m too sensitive.” You moaned, the feeling of his fingers pumping in and out of you quickly becoming the only thing your mind could process.
“Awe, is it too much, Sugar?” JJ cooed, not stopping his movements inside of your warm heat.
“It’s too much.” You said, not sure if it came out more as a cry or a moan. Either way it was music to JJ’s ears. You tried to pull away but JJ grabbed a hold of your thigh and held you in place. “JJ, please.” You whined, your eyes brimming with tears from the pleasure and slight pain coursing through your body.
“But you take my fingers so well, baby.” JJ said, adding a third finger and picking up the pace.
“Ah—JJ!” You cried out, the pleasure in your body increasing even more. JJ’s fast pace of his fingers beginning to spark the fire in your lower abdomen once again. The overwhelming pleasure in your body becomes almost a need. The only thing you can think of his JJ and his fingers pumping in and out of you at a fast pace. A moan slipping from your lips again as your breathing becomes even more erratic and labored.
Your hands gripped frantically at the bedding in an attempt to hold onto anything to help ground yourself. The intense pleasure turning into an overwhelming need for JJ to give you more, to ruin you. “JJ, harder. Please.” You moaned, meeting his eyes with your own once again.
He smirked down at your desperate state, seeing how quickly your pleas changed. “Harder? I thought it was too much?” JJ laughed, slowing the pace of his fingers to only slightly moving.
Your hips tried bucking, wanting his fingers to resume their delicious torture inside you. “No!” You cried when he held your hips in place from moving. “I need more! Please!” You were now begging. Your voice exclaiming in a cry of desperation. Your face and more so your body screamed how desperate you were for him, your body needing JJ like a drug. You don’t know what came over you but all you knew in the moment was that you needed him.
“Like this?” He teased, suddenly slamming his fingers back into your entrance at a rough and fast pace.
You screamed at the sudden feeling of his fingers ramming into you brutally. Your eyes rolling to the back of your head as your back arched off the bed. You felt the hand that was gripping your thigh now placing itself over your lower stomach and holding you down. You moaned at the new and more intense feeling of his fingers plunging into you with his hand holding you down directly above where his fingers were inside you.
You moaned his name loudly as your legs began to shake. You knew were close and JJ knew it too by the way you were clenching around his fingers, and hips began rutting despite being held down. “You gonna cum all over my fingers again, sugar?”
You let out a mix of a moan and a sob at his words, the feeling of being on the brink of your high making all of your muscles tighten. “G-gonna cum for you, JJ.” You whimpered as the coil in your stomach finally wound up before snapping and releasing waves of pleasure all down your body. “JJ!” You sobbed, arm coming to cover your face on instinct as your whole body shook from your orgasm. You clenched hard around JJ’s fingers as you rode out your second high, hips involuntarily bucking up against his touch. Your body twitched once your orgasm finished and JJ removed his hand from your dripping core.  
Your eyes were closed as your arm still rested on your face, trying to calm down from your orgasm. JJ crawled up your body once again until he was hovering right above you, this time trying not to put any of his weight on your sensitive body.
He gently removed your arm from your face and watched as your eyes slowly opened. A soft smile formed on his lips while he leaned down and attached his lips to yours. You could still taste some of yourself on his lips still, but that was in the back of your mind. Even after coming hard two times earlier, all you could think was him. The way he kissed you and his scent filled your senses, you wanted nothing more than him inside of you.
JJ pulled away from the kiss, looking back into your eyes. “One more?” He asked, not wanting to get carried away.
You smiled at him. “One more.” You reassured leaning in for another kiss. He happily kissed back as he kicked off his pants and boxers. He pulled away, grabbing his member in his hand. Hissing as he spread the pre-cum around the tip of his cock, giving it a few pumps. He lined the head up with your entrance, looking up at you for confirmation. You nodded the go ahead before he pushed into you.
He slid in easily from the juices that coated your walls. You both moaned at the feeling of him finally being inside you. You let out a shaky breath from the hyperaware feeling of him being inside you, your lower stomach already beginning to react to JJ inside of you. JJ looked down at where your body parts connected, groaning. “I don’t think I’m gonna last long.”
JJ looked up at you, pleasure already written across his facial features. You’re sure yours mirrored his exact expression as well. “Me neither.” You giggled lightly.
Placing a kiss on your lips once more, JJ began moving his hips. You sigh at the feeling of him starting off slow. His head buried itself into your neck trying to hold back his moans, and failing. You wrapped your legs around his waist, the new angle making more pleasure shoot up through your body once again. Your body already started to gently tremble at the feeling as you basked in the feeling of having your boyfriend inside of you.
“Y/N.” JJ moaned into your neck as he picked up the pace of his thrusts, increasingly getting faster and harder with every snap of his hips.
You whined at the feeling, your arms flying around the back of his neck to hold him closer to you, touch him in any way you possibly could. The way JJ was moaning and grunting into your ear making you realize just how close you already were to your release.
“Fuck, baby. So good. So good for me.” He moaned against your neck.
Your eyes rolled back feeling yourself get closer and closer to the edge. The feeling of JJ thrusting in and out of you already enough to make you shake with pleasure, but hearing him moan against your ear was like being sent straight to heaven. “I’m close.” You moaned, running your hands through JJ’s hair.
“Cum for me baby, I’m right behind you.” JJ groaned.
His words sent you tipping over the edge, releasing your final orgasm and coming around his cock. Your eyes clamped shut, and your mouth open in a scream despite no sound coming out. Your high pushing JJ close to the edge, hearing your soft whimpers start back up once you come down from the waves of pleasure rolling through your body. “JJ,” you started, getting his attention. His eyes met yours looking at how thoroughly fucked you looked and thinking it was the most beautiful and sexy thing in the world. “Cum inside me. Please, J.” You moaned, wanting nothing more than to see your boyfriend fall apart on top of you while he filled you up with his cum.
Your words alone sent JJ spiraling over the edge. A throaty moan escaping his lips as he came deep inside you. You felt hurt spurts of cum begin to fill up inside you, relishing to the warm and full feeling JJ was making you feel. His hips sputtered as his face buried itself back into the crook of your neck and he rode out his high.
When JJ came down from his high, his eyes opened again. He pulled out of you slowly while watching his cum drip out you and onto the sheets. His forehead came to rest against yours, both eyes shutting in content. “I love you, my needy girl.”
“I love you too, JJ.”
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kindapinkskies · a year ago
i know | jj maybank
hellooooo i've risen from the dead and its with a fic about outer banks... i've fallen in love with jj... thats my baby
this was supposed to be a 5+1 concept and it still kinda is but i got really really carried away. as my new friend @captainpogue​ calls it the too much gene. so buckle up and grab a snack this is 21k words lmaoooo i hope you enjoy
i love you already
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warnings: nothing more than what is mentioned in the show
You were laying on your stomach, on your bed, flipping through a book. It didn’t have your full attention as your mind was elsewhere. Music filtered in through your headphones but you weren’t really listening to it, either. It was almost dark outside and with the power still out, the few candles lit in your room did little to help you focus on the words in front of you.
It was also extremely hot. You were sweating just laying there. Your shirt was stuck to you and your shorts felt uncomfortable even if they were cloth sleeping shorts. Letting out a frustrated groan, you drop your head down to the book but immediately wince when you feel it get stuck to your forehead. You have to slowly lift your head and peel the page off with your fingers. Gross.
Moving the book, you lay your head down again and just try to breathe. The events of the day are finally catching up to you, making you a bit tired. Your mind is racing as the memories flash through like a movie playing behind your eyelids. Walking down the street and hearing a distressed, “Just shut up, Pope!” You recognized the voice like it was your own and rushed across the street where you came face to face with your group. JJ had looked at you, guilt shining in his eyes as he looked back at Shoupe, “Yeah, it was all me.”
A distressed sigh -one that matched the one you let out as you helplessly watched JJ get pushed into the back of the cop car- leaves your body in a rush and it makes your bed bounce just a little with the force of it. Kiara had moved up to you as you watched Pope let out a scream and storm off, his dad following him angrily with the hat Pope had thrown to the ground. She explained what she knew and all you could do was close your eyes and let out a breath. You knew JJ getting arrested, again, wouldn’t be good for him. He’s seventeen now, still a minor, but he’s so close to being tried as an adult and that scares you.
“Hey, you want to go to the police station, see if we can do something?” Kie had offered when she noticed that you’d done nothing but stare off in the direction the cop car had gone.
“No, his dad will most likely show up.” you stated and winced at your own words. “I’m just going to go home. I’d say text me but you know, towers are down. And my phone might even be dead with the whole no power thing.”
Kie laughed at your tone and it pulled a laugh out of you as well.
Rolling onto your back, you cover your face with your hands and try really hard to keep your frustrations at bay. You know JJ didn’t do shit this time around. You know what he’s covering for and why he’s doing it but god damn it you wished he had a little bit more common sense sometimes. You wish he wouldn’t put others before himself sometimes, even though that wasn’t in his nature. You wish he didn’t have such a temper sometimes, or the need to prove himself, because then that’d help him stay under the radar a bit easier. But you knew that JJ would never lose those parts of himself, that’s just who he was. Someone who cared about others too much because he didn’t want them to feel what he’s felt his whole life but had a temper like no other.
The temper is something you’ve tried working on with him for as long as you’ve known him. Since the first time you saw him lose it at the age of twelve. It was an unhealthy coping mechanism, to fly off the handles as soon as someone upset him enough. You guessed it was because he knew nothing else. Growing up around that kind of behavior, it just kind of sticks. He tries though, tries to keep it under control for as long as possible though, hating that he gets so angry so easily but people just make him so mad. You’ve told him that he gets that way because he bottles up everything he’s feeling when he’s feeling it and it just keeps building until he snaps. And when he snaps, it’s because he filled himself up with so much rage it has nowhere else to go than through his fists, or yelling, or apparently holding someone at gunpoint.
Tears of frustration for JJ start to build behind your eyelids and your nose starts to tingle but you just can’t help it. JJ doesn’t deserve the things he’s been put through, he really doesn’t. He’s a good person. He has good intentions behind most of the crazy shit he does. It’s just that he doesn’t think of the consequences before he goes through with his impulses. His snap judgement choices weigh out any other rational thought in his head.
Like he clearly didn’t think of what would happen to him when taking the blame for a felony charge and you really hope he’s okay. You kinda hope his dad didn’t show up to get him from the police station and that he’s still there because you know the outcome of the scenario. You’ve been on the comforting end of those scenarios more often than not and each time it breaks your heart. To see the boy cut up and bruised by the hand of his own father. He brushes it off every time, ‘It’s nothing I can’t handle’ but you see the pain there. The shine in his eyes and the deep breaths to keep himself from crying. You see it. Every. Time.
You can only hope that today won’t be one of those days where JJ will be littered with dark bruises and deep cuts. Your heart hammers in your chest at the thought of JJ not even making it out of his house today. That’s he’s too hurt to move and that makes a breath stutter out of you in the force of a sob. You press the heels of your hands harder to your closed eyelids in hopes to stop the tears from falling when you feel a weight drop down around your legs. You let out a yelp as your eyes fly open and you sit up in the process.
JJ stands there, at the end of your bed, with his hands on either side of your knees. Your heart nearly drops to your toes when you take in his appearance. Your hopes of him coming out of today unscathed were just that, hopes. The left side of his face is nearly purple, there’s cuts on his eyebrow, cheek, jaw, and a few around his neck line. His eyes are red rimmed and the tip of his nose is just as red. Jaw clenched and breathing ragged, you can tell he’s doing everything he can to hold back his tears. Some have already fallen, you know that, but that was when he was alone. Now he’s trying to act like everything’s fine when you know it’s not. When you both know it’s not.
“JJ,” you breathe out, removing your headphones and tossing your phone to the floor. His face crumples at your voice and you’re a bit relieved. He’s not going to hide how he feels and that just makes you whisper his name again, “JJ.”
That’s all it takes before JJ removes his backpack and climbs up the length of your body, pushing you to lay back down as he settles on top of you. He shakes against you as you wrap yourself around him. One hand goes up the back of his shirt and the other knocks off his hat so you can run your fingers through his hair. He lets out a shaky breath against your neck and then he’s crying. He shoves his face into your neck and you move a little to the side to let him get more comfortable, wanting to give him all the comfort in the world.
“Shh, it’s okay. You’re okay. You’re safe.” You repeat the words over and over again, hoping that they’ll sink in and bounce around in his head so he’ll believe them. “I was so worried about you. That’s why I was crying when you showed up. You worry me, JJ. You always do.”
He starts to settle down after that and you let out a breath, moving one of your hands to quickly remove the tears from your own cheeks before moving back to running your fingers through his hair. “It’s not a bad thing that you worry me. I only worry because I care about you. I care about you more than I care about anyone else.”
Stuttering breaths still fan over the skin of your neck and you just continue to run your hands over him. Your hand on his back is lightly scratching at the skin there, your fingernails leaving a trail of goosebumps. Your other hand is playing with the strands of his hair, untangling them and smoothing them over. “You’ll be okay, JJ.”
When you feel him nod, you know you got him back down to earth. “I’ll be okay.”
“Okay then, let’s go check out those cuts.”
You both get off the bed, JJ focusing too hard on the ground but nonetheless let’s you take his hand and guide him down the hall and into the bathroom. Once he’s seated, on the closed lid of the toilet, you move in between his legs to get close enough to inspect his face. His hands trail up the backs of your legs and wrap around your thighs. It’s a subconscious move on his part, it always is when you’re in this position. For some reason it brings him comfort, it grounds him, keeps him aware that you’re there and in front of him. His thumbs trace up and down on the outsides of your thighs as he tilts his head back for you.
You clean up the dry blood around his eyebrow, cheek, and lip. He hisses at the pressure to get it all off and whines when you clean the cuts with an antiseptic. You apologize by placing delicate kisses over the broken skin. A sigh escapes through his parted lips and his hands move up to the point where his fingers graze the bottom of your shorts.
“Hi, baby,” you whisper against his lips, ghosting yours over his to try and soothe the sting out of the cut. You’re not too sure how good it works but JJ relaxes a bit more under your touch.  
A small smile pulls at JJ’s lips as his eyes meet yours, “Hi, baby,” he echoes and his lips brush against yours.
Running your fingers through his hair, you tug a little at the strands and his eyes fall closed once again. You take the opportunity to run your fingers carefully over the bruises littering his delicate skin. There’s nothing you wish for more than for your fingertips to magically heal the darkened, painful, skin of his face.
Another sigh leaves through his parted lips and this time he sounds a bit watery. You grab onto his face with both hands and push your thumbs up under his closed eyelids to see if tears will leak through. And when they do, you swipe them away. “I owe 30 grand in restitution for sinking the boat. My dad didn’t like that.”
The question of what happened would always sit there on the tip of your tongue but you always knew what happened so you would never ask. It was always the same, it was just the reason that changed. And JJ would tell you it every time, once he calmed enough to talk about it.
“You didn’t do it, JJ.”
JJ sighs, “Yeah, I know. But Pope doesn’t deserve that charge. He has so much to look forward to. A way to get out of here and I couldn’t let him throw that away.”
Your hands move his face to a position that when he opens his eyes, he’ll be looking right at you. He knows that so he does and when he does, tears slide down his cheeks before your thumbs have a chance to stop them. “Yeah, but what about you?”
“We all know where I come from. There’s no way I’ll ever be more than that.”
He cuts you off, “No, it’s true. Look at me? Look at the shit I’m in. I have nothing going for me. I have nothing to lose. I might as well start now, the life I’m destined to live.”
Your nose starts to tingle once again, the tears resurfacing, “JJ, stop.”
“What?” he scoffs, “You want me to stop telling the truth? When will you realize that I’m correct? That I’m not good for anyone.”
“You’re nothing like him, JJ. You never have been and that’s something you need to realize.” You tug on his hair again, to make sure you have his attention. “The way you care about those you love. I mean, today was a bit reckless but you protected your friend. You protect the entire friend group. You’d never hurt anyone just for the hell of it, just because you felt like it, that’s not you, JJ. “
Looking him in the eyes, you try your best to convey the severity of your words, “You say you have nothing to lose but you do. You have me for one, then there's John B, Kie, Pope. If you keep doing reckless shit you’ll lose us. We need you JJ, you’re the biggest support system in our little group.”
JJ doesn’t say anything, just closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. He taps on your thigh, signaling for you to move and when you do he just walks out of the bathroom. You let out a sigh and drop your head, leaving it to hang for a few moments while you steady your breathing to make sure you don’t cry. Everything you said was true and you wished he believed it. The group is full of strong personalities but JJ is the one that keeps everyone a bit sane. He stops people from bickering, he keeps the mood light when it gets to be heavy, he listens to everyone so intently that he knows every detail about anyone. He’s the first to speak up when others are talking down to your group, he's the first to throw a punch in defense. He’s the one, specifically, that brings light to your life every day.
You clean up the bathroom slowly, distracting yourself so you don’t cry. Now is not the time to be emotional, not when JJ’s headspace is so low. This isn’t the first time this has happened and you know it won’t be the last. The amount of self loathing that boy has for himself will stick around no matter what people tell him. It gets better at times but his dad has a way of making it come to the forefront of his brain more often than not.
It’s about fifteen minutes later, stalling as much as possible, before you make your way back to your room. You have a glass of water and some pain killers now because you know that JJ didn’t leave, that he wouldn’t leave. He never does.
“Here,” you murmur, handing over the glass and two pills. “Lay down and go to sleep.”
He has his shirt off and he watches as you move around the room. His gaze is heavy and it makes you feel even warmer than you’re already feeling. You pick up things around the room, dirty clothes, cups, pieces of trash, anything to keep you busy. It’s not something you want to do but you also want to give JJ some space. You won’t admit it but it upsets you every time he starts talking like that and you know he knows that. He always lasts about 13 minutes before he breaks down.
And right on the dot, as you have an armful of dirty clothes to drop in the hamper, he speaks up. “Will you come lay down?”
“I’m going to take a shower. I feel gross.”
JJ lets out a tired sigh, “I’ve calmed down, please come here.”
“I feel gross,” you argue. He may have calmed down but you’re still hurt at his words. You know he doesn’t do it on purpose but it hurts to know that he believes he’s not worth anything, that he’s not afraid of losing you or anyone else that cares about him.
“There’s no point in showering, if I’m not going to shower and we end up pressed against each other anyway. We’ll be sweaty regardless.” He reasons, his voice on the verge of despair and you know that he needs you close right now. That he needs the comfort he seeks. “Please?”
Your heart softens at the tone of his voice and you cave.  Dropping the clothes into the hamper you shuffle over to the empty side of your bed. JJ turns his back to you and you settle in behind him, shoving one arm under his neck and wrapping the other one around his waist. You pull him close to you, both palms flat against his chest, molding your body against his. JJ brings a hand to the top of yours and laces his fingers with yours. He lets out a stuttering breath when you place your lips to the back of his neck.
“I have one thing to lose,” he breathes out, “and it’s you.” You press another kiss to the back of his neck before digging your nose to the skin there. “I love you, you know”
“Yeah, I know.” You squeeze his hand and he squeezes back. “I love you, you know.”
JJ sighs and relaxes completely, like he’d been waiting for you to say those exact words, “I know.”
He falls asleep a few minutes later.
It’s about three days later when you’re walking down the street when you notice a familiar looking jeep coming towards you. Your hopes for it to just keep driving die before they’re fully even there because it stops next to you, making you stumble a bit at the closeness.
“Topper.” you sigh, stepping up to his driver window. “I have a name.”
“Yeah, but I don’t really care.” He looks you up and down before smirking, “But I could.”
You roll your eyes, “Hm, in your dreams. What do you want?”
“Just wanted to see how your little group of Pogues are doing with your precious Pope in the slammer?” He raises an eyebrow in question.
You cross your arms over your chest and step closer. You’re not above fighting. You know how to, you were taught how to fight correctly, your dad teaching you at a young age. He felt the need to, with where you live and the stability you have in such an area.
“Yeah, see, JJ was the one that ended up there.”
Topper’s face falls and his skin turns a bit pale at your words. He won’t ever admit it, but you know that he’s secretly scared of JJ. Him and his friends, they all are. Never once have you seen them go to him one on one. They always have 2 or more and it always fills you with pride because JJ does know how to fight but it’s never fair because he’s just one and they gang up on him.
“Why?” he questions.
“Well, Top, that’s because he’s a good person. Unlike you.” you sneer, not backing down. He’s bigger than you, probably stronger than you but you’re not scared of him. You never have been.
“I didn’t want to press the charges, it wasn’t me!” His cocky demeanor falls quickly at the newfound information and it makes you laugh. “It was my mom, I swear.”
“Right, so you couldn’t have stopped her? Couldn’t have done anything when you know the reason it was done in the first place was because you jumped someone who was just trying to do their job. Someone who works for their money. Does someone working to keep themselves afloat scare you? What is it! Huh? You don’t like it?” You can’t help yourself. The force in which your voice is coming out startles you just as much as it does Topper.
“Oh please,” Topper scoffs, rolling his eyes in the process, “don’t act like they’re all innocent. I had a gun held to my head.”
“Yeah, true, but you were about to kill one of our friends! You’re no better than any of us. Oh! And should I mention how you almost killed another one the other night at the outdoor movie? Should I bring that up to someone? Hm? Maybe your mom or maybe the police?” You tilt your head to the side, taunting him a bit.
“Like anyone would believe someone like you,” Topper laughs.
You laugh right back, “Do you forget that I’m actually right under you, status wise? That my family just chooses to live where we do because we’re not a bunch of prissy snobs. People would believe me.”
“Do your Pogues know about you?”
“Of course they do. Do you think that me having money changes anything?” You question, rolling your eyes. “Actually, this conversation is going nowhere. I’m done. I have somewhere I need to be.”
When you step back and start walking, Topper gets out and follows you. “Come back here!”
“For what! What do you want?”
“You need to be knocked down a peg or two. Remind you where you are and who you hang out with,” He steps up to you, trying to seem threatening.
You look up at him bored, “Okay, Topper. Why don’t you get back in your car and drive away. Go do some drugs or beat up on someone working.”
He grabs at your arm and pulls you chest to chest with him, getting in your face in the process. “You don’t know me!”
“And I don’t want to. Now, let me go.”
When you fight against his grip he just holds on tighter. You wince and you know it’ll bruise, “I’m not above hitting a girl. Especially when she’s asking for it.”
“Do it, I dare you.” you challenge, stepping up to nearly pressing your nose to his. You’re not too sure how you didn’t see it coming, probably because you were really challenging him. But he didn’t seem to think the same thing because he surges forward to press his lips to yours. You back away as far as possible but his grip on you doesn’t let you go far and his lips make contact with yours. “Get off of me!”
You stomp on his foot and knee him in the stomach and that gets him to let go. “You bitch!” he grumbles out and reaches for your leg, pulling it out from under you. You land on the ground with a groan and kick at him when he grabs your ankle and bends down to punch you across the face, “Fucking stop!”
“You’re the one that grabbed me, now let go!” You kick at him again and get him in the groin this time. And when he bends over you get enough momentum to deliver a punch to the side of his face. He lands on his side and you push him around until he’s on his back and punch him again before standing up. You stick your boot up under his chin and step on his neck just enough to make it harder for him to breathe. “Don’t ever fucking touch me again.”
“You bitch!” He exclaims again, trying to lunge up at you again but when it doesn’t work he scratches down your leg, cutting into the skin. You push into his neck more when he doesn’t stop. “You do belong with the Pogues.”
“I know,” you smirk, leaning down. “You get your mom to drop the charges against JJ and I’ll make sure he doesn’t come after you for what you just pulled.”
“You think I’m scared of him!” He yells out, choking a bit when your foot slips against his movement.
“I know that you are. And after he finds out it was you that did this to me, it’ll be a whole other type of anger from him.” you whisper, shoving against his throat again. “Drop the charges and I’ll keep him away from you, for this.”
Topper gasps and starts to grab at your ankle but you don’t move it and you won’t move it until he agrees. It only takes a few seconds before he caves, “Okay! Okay, I’ll do it!”
“Good,” you smile, pulling back a little and a gasping breath echoes loudly between the two of you. “Do it now.”
Topper groans and tries to fight you once again, punching at your thigh this time around and it makes you stumble back but not enough because you slam your foot down on his chest, knocking the wind out of him. “Do it now.”
He lets out a breath and fumbles around in his pocket before his phone is presented and he puts it to his ear. “On speaker.”
Once Topper hangs up the phone, after spitting out some bullshit excuse, his mom agrees. She sounds reluctant but she agrees nonetheless. Topper punches you in the thigh once again, this time harder, losing your balance and hitting the ground once more. He kicks at you, foot coming in contact with your lower back after you turned away from him.
“You won’t ever do that to me again, you hear me?” Topper yells, standing up above you.
You laugh and turn over onto your back, “What? Your ego hurt after being held down by a girl.” His face turns red and you can tell he’s trying his hardest not to kick you again. It just makes you laugh more as you stand up to your full height once more. “Don’t let the charges being dropped fall through. If they do? I won’t have any control over what happens.”
You start to walk away and another laugh escapes when you hear Topper, from behind you, let out a frustrated scream before his car door slams and he speeds away. He’s too easy. Messing with him is one of your favorite things to do, even if it ends up with you limping a bit and blood trickling down your leg.
When you reach your destination, The Chateau as always, you’re relieved to only see Kie at the dock you’re all supposed to be meeting at. You initially thought you’d be the last one to show up, your run in with Topper added at least 20 extra minutes to your journey, but you’re glad it doesn’t seem that way. Kie looks up when a branch snaps under your foot and you can see a smile outlining her face when she spots you but it quickly turns into a frown when she sees the state you’re in.
“What the hell happened to you?” she screeches, meeting you halfway.
You look around the property, in search of a certain blonde boy because you absolutely had no idea how you were going to explain this to him. JJ was absolutely going to lose it once he saw you and he absolutely isn’t going to let it go until he knows the truth. You thought about lying to him but he knows you better than he knows himself and he’d see through the lie before it would even have a chance to leave your mouth.
“Where are the guys? I thought I’d be late.”
Kie gives you an unimpressed look at your obvious avoidance of the subject, “I don’t know, something about Figure 8 and Sarah Cameron. That’s all I heard on the phone call.”
You nod, not really caring where they are in the slightest, “Cool. Now will you help me clean up a bit. It doesn’t feel as bad as it looks, I promise.”
She runs her eyes down your whole body before meeting your eyes, “That’s a lie. Do you not feel the blood actively running down your leg?”
Looking down, your eyes widen at just how much blood is covering your leg. “Shit,” you mutter, pressing a palm to your forehead.
“What happened?”
“I ran into Topper,” you sigh, the adrenaline quickly leaving your body now that you’re standing still.
Kiara gasps loudly, “By yourself!”
“Yes,” you groan, not really seeing the big deal. “He looks worse.”
Kie looks like she doesn’t believe you and she’s clearly about to question you when the van pulls up and JJ loudly gets out, yelling out to you both, “Yo, guys, someone beat the shit out of Topper and it wasn’t even us!”
He clearly hasn’t taken in the sight of you yet but you turn your attention back to Kie and you can’t help but smirk at the shocked expression on her face. “JJ’s going to lose his shit in about 2 seconds.”
And just as Kiara closes her mouth, JJ’s voice nearly echoes through the trees, “What in the fuck!” You wince at his tone and just how loud it is.
He was still behind you, you purposely kept your eyes locked on Kiara so you don’t have to face him just yet. But that’s clearly not going to stand because JJ steps in front of you, effectively pushing Kie out of the way. “Who did this?”
“I fell?” You raise your voice as if asking a question, scrunching your face up into your shoulders. The deadpan look on your boyfriend's face makes you let out a sigh and drop your shoulders. “I’d like to say for you to see the other guy but you already have.”
Pope’s voice cuts in before JJ even has a chance to process your words, “You did that to Topper!” He sounds impressed and a big smile pulls at your lips as you turn your head to look at him.
“Holy shit,” John B exhales staring at you in complete awe. “He was fucked up.”
A laugh bubbles past your lips and your cheeks heat up at the attention you’re receiving. The admiration on the two boys' faces almost makes you forget about the other boy in your presence. The one that’s been awfully quiet. You turn back to him and the look on his face makes you frown. His pupils are blown and his jaw is clenched so tight you’re positive his teeth hurt. His focus is dead set on the base of your throat.
Waving your hand in front of his face, you snap your fingers as well, trying to bring him back to you, “Earth to JJ. Come back to me.”
“Topper did this to you?” he asks and when you nod, something flashes in his eyes so quick you find yourself trying to chase it. Figure out what’s going through his head. “I’m going to kill him.”
You’re stunned at the way his voice sounds, deep and raspy, filled with so much hatred. You’re almost positive his voice has never been so low before and it sends chills down your spine. You blink at him but when you open your eyes he’s not in front of you anymore. He’s only a few steps away but you can’t really move as the pain in your leg finally settled in.
“JJ,” you cry out, half out of pain and half to get his attention. “Don’t do anything! Come back here.”
You swivel in your spot and watch him as he continues to stomp into the house. A few things crash around before he comes back out, shoving what you assume is the gun into the back of his pants. “JB, give me the keys.”
“No, don’t give them to him!” You yell out. You need to get his attention.
“What are you thinking? Do you really think I’m just going to sit here and do nothing when that piece of shit put his hands on you?” JJ shouts, standing a few feet away from you now.
Pope comes up behind JJ and puts both hands to his shoulder, “Calm down, man,” he says but JJ roughly shrugs his shoulder and pushes Pope off of him. He puts his hands up in surrender but stays close. “You can’t just go pull a gun out on him and kill him.” He reasons.
“Oh yeah?” He challenges. “Watch me.”
“JJ, stop it,” Kie cries out now.
“Yeah man, you saw what Topper looked like. You should be happy that she’s the one who did it.” John B points out, gesturing to you and JJ follows the movement of his hand and he looks to you again.
He looks at you with his brows furrowed, a storm swirling around in his eyes as he stares you down. The eye contact isn’t something you normally back down from but the intensity in his eyes right now throws you off. It feels like you’re being chastised. You know he’s trying to figure out why you fought Topper. He knows that you don’t just out right fight someone, even if they start it first. He knows that the only time you ever fight is in self defense or to defend someone you care about.
“What did you do?” JJ asks because he knows you did this for a reason. Something more than just for yourself because you don’t personally care for Topper, you’d never give him the time of day and that includes fighting him. “Why’d you fight him?”
“Well,” you shrug, looking down to your feet. Your leg was still bleeding. You should probably do something about that. “He made me mad.”
JJ scoffs, “Your temper is not as bad as mine. There’s more to it. Tell me, now, or I will go kill him.”
You hesitate some more, fixated on your feet and the way they look in your boots. They’re a bit scuffed but they still look good. You focus on that and not the four sets of eyes burning into your frame. Telling them, telling JJ why you fought would result in JJ feeling like shit. You really don’t want him to feel like shit because you did what you did to help him. But he’ll feel like shit because you got hurt and you got hurt on his behalf. There’s nothing he hates more than someone standing up for him and getting hurt because of it.
“Today, please.” JJ snaps and you look up at him to see the anger plastered on his face.
“I was walking here when he pulled up beside me. He wanted to taunt me about Pope being in jail for the whole boat thing and I told him that it was you that took the blame for it. He tried arguing with me but when I started to walk away he grabbed me,” you take a breath when you see JJ step forward like he’s ready to protect you from the words you’re about to say. “And well, when I was challenging him to hit me he kissed me but I -“
“He did what now?” JJ cuts in, his voice so deep and slow your eyes widen at him. Kiara and Pope’s jaw drops at the same time and John B looks taken aback at the way his best friend sounds. Never have they ever heard him sound so angry. You’ve never even heard him so angry before.
Everyone, but you and JJ, glances at each other in confusion but you don’t even dare to look away from JJ. They don’t know what’s going on or why JJ would get so mad at the idea of someone else kissing you. Kiara had a suspicion long ago that the two of you were dating but you shot it down even though she was right. That was almost a year ago and as far as you know they don’t know you’re actually together. At this point you’re not too sure why they don’t even know or why you haven’t told them but you have a feeling they’re about to be real surprised here soon. The look in JJ’s eyes is possessive, it’s down right a claim that you’re his and no one has the right to kiss you.
“Let me finish,” you put a hand up. “I kicked him, shoved him down to the ground, punched him, then held him by the throat with my foot-“
“My god,” John B breathes out, once again looking in awe. Pope just nods in agreement, almost in a daze. Kiara, well she just looks impressed.
“While I slightly choked him with my foot,” you pause for a second, preparing yourself for the worst reaction from JJ, “I got him to drop the charges on the boat.”
It goes deathly quiet for a few moments before three voices come at you all at one, “What?”
You ignore them, still looking at JJ, “By the end of the day your name should be cleared. You won’t be held responsible for the boat anymore.”
JJ doesn’t say anything, he just continues to stare but you watch him carefully. His breaths are deep and calculated, his jaw is clenching and unclenching, his fists loosen and he rests his palms against his thighs. You can practically see the wheels inside his brain working through the information, processing the fact that you did this for him. He’s not used to someone caring for him this way, no matter how long you’ve been there for him, he’s still not used to the love you have for him. He went so long without it, it takes him a while to process it.
But you see the moment it finally settles in his brain, the second that he fully processed the information you’d given him. His chest stutters briefly and you know the tears are going to come next. He breathes in a long breath, and holds it in his lungs before it rushes out through his nose. He’s trying to keep up his tough front, but he’s failing. His eyes finally soften and they go back to the normal light they usually are.
Then, in the blink of an eye he’s in front of you. His hands cradle your face before his body collides with yours, hard, and his lips are on yours. The kiss is hard, it’s possessive, passionate, sincere but hasty, fervent, needy, desperate. It’s overwhelming and so full of emotion that it takes you a second to respond but when you do, JJ sighs into it and pulls you impossibly closer. One hand moves to your lower back and the other one stays on your jaw where his thumb pushes against your face to open your mouth even more. He is absolutely, unquestionably claiming you right here, right now. Not that you need to be claimed but you don’t mind. You’ve never felt so alive before.
The love JJ is conveying through this kiss is everything you’ve ever needed and you reciprocate the best that you can. You want him to know that you’re his and he’s yours. Just how it should be.
JJ whines when you pull away and he chases after you but you need to breathe, “Jesus, J.”
“I’ll say,” Kiara agrees, a little out of breath herself at what she just witnessed. Two seventeen year olds should not know how to share such a passionate looking kiss.
“I didn’t know friends kiss like that,” John B jokes, nudging Pope when he laughs.
“That’s because they don’t.” he continues laughing.
JJ ignores everything they say, “You didn’t have to do that.”
“I know, but I did.” You shrug, shifting on your feet and wincing at the pain that shoots through your leg and JJ notices that. “But like can we go get me cleaned up or something, I need to sit down.”
“Yeah,” JJ nods hastily, “you guys go ahead and go out without us,” he looks at the other three, that still look like they’re in complete shock, and doesn’t wait for their response before he looks back to you, “can you walk?”
You nod but he doesn’t listen. JJ swiftly throws you over his shoulder and starts walking towards the house. “I love you, you know,” he says once he’s far enough away from everyone.
“I know.”
It’s the next day when you and JJ make an appearance after staying inside all day the day before. Once you had showered and iced down the parts of your body that hurt, you fell asleep and stayed asleep until it was dark. The adrenaline in your system was completely gone and you were in a lot of pain so sleep came naturally.
You met John B, Pope, Kie, and even Sarah, at the beach. It was around 11am when you and JJ walked up to them as they were sitting there in the sand. As you approached, they went quiet and watched as JJ helped you sit, hand you a bottle of water before sitting down behind you. His legs press against yours on either side of your body and his hands rest on top of your thighs. You can feel four sets of eyes on you and you give it about 3 more seconds before someone breaks the quiet.
“How are you feeling?” Kie is the one to break it. You glance at her and give her a smile, one that she returns.
“Sore but I’ll be fine.”
John B laughs a bit of a disbelieving laugh, “What you explained yesterday was pretty badass.”
“Hell yeah it was,” Pope excitedly cuts in. “I should say thank you, as well.”
You just shrug, “I would’ve done it for any of you.”
“Did Topper really do that to you?” Sarah questions you, quizzically looking you up and down. Your face bruised and so did your leg. The scratches down your leg are scabbed and also bruised.
The hands on your thighs tighten and dig into the skin there. You gently place your hands on his, soothing the anger that still sits there. He calmed down yesterday, barely, but he did enough to listen to what happened when you explained it again. Adding in the details you knew would calm him down. He tried to argue with you a few times but you finally got through to him, made him accept the fact that you did what you did and there’s no turning back now.
“What a dick. I can’t believe I dated him,” Sarah continues when you nod at her.
As everyone laughs and starts to pick on Sarah for her choices, you shift your upper body enough to twist around and look at JJ. His eyes are dark and his jaw is clenched tight, pushing out the muscles in his neck. You let out a sigh and bring a hand up to his cheek, soothing your fingers over his jaw to get him to unclench. He’s angry, that much you can tell, but he’s trying his best to keep a wraps on it. It’s been very difficult to keep him steady. Every time he looks at you, he tenses and his breathing gets all deep. It’ll be like that for a few days.
“JJ, calm down,” you whisper to him. The fingers digging into your thighs tighten some more before he relaxes, his eyes meeting yours and the dark anger in them fizzling away slowly. “Hey, there you are.”
“I still can’t believe you won’t let me go kick his ass,” JJ scoffs, moving to lean back on his hands. The movement makes you sway a little, having not realized how much you were relying on him to keep you upright. “I just want to kick his ass.”
He always wants to kick his ass but you know the underlying anger in him would take it further than that and that’s not something you want. Also, “If you kick his ass the charges will come back,” you remind him.
JJ closes his eyes and takes a breath. You move around between his legs and sit sideways, your legs bent over one of his now so you don’t have to be so twisted to look at him. Your back hurts a bit too much for that. He pulls up the leg that’s against your back and presses it into you, giving you something to lean on. You place a hand on his thigh, up by his hip, and lean into him a bit, “I’m sure you’ll get the chance to kick his ass again but just not for this, okay? I hit him just as much as he hit me.”
That brings a smirk to his face, “You know, I wouldn’t mind seeing you choke someone out with those boots you wear. I’m a bit mad I missed it, I’m sure it was hot as fuck.”
And that catches the attention of everyone else and you turn your head when John B speaks up, “Fuck, I was thinking the same thing,” he laughs and laughs even harder when Sarah gasps. “I’m just saying.”
“Actually,” Kie shrugs, “I wouldn’t mind picking a fight with Topper just to see that.”
You let out a loud laugh, your head thrown back at the sheer force in which it comes out, “Can we wait a few days maybe, I hurt.”
JJ immediately brings a hand up to soothe over your leg. It does look bad and honestly it does hurt as bad as it looks. It only takes a few seconds for his other hand to brush over the nasty looking bruise on your back too. Four sets of eyes track the movements, “Does it hurt that bad?”
“Yeah, actually. The cuts sting the worst and the sun makes them feel like they’re burning.” Your answer makes JJ frown. His eyes flicker with anger once more, “Stay calm,” you state a bit forcefully.
You can tell that the group wants to question the movements between you and JJ. The kiss you shared in front of them yesterday was anything but the friendly kisses that you share with the group most days and it’s been on the forefront of their brains ever since. Sarah is the only one that doesn’t track the movements for more than what they are, she didn’t see the kiss and the closeness is no different than what it usually is for the both of you.
The good thing about being with JJ is that nothing really changed between the two of you when you started dating. As kids, you were alway closer than with anyone else. JJ trusted you, protected you, cared deeply for you from the beginning. The touchiness started when you were 15, feelings between you a little too strong to ignore so you went from the friendly hugs and touches to a bit more. Hands would rest in more intimate places, no longer would they rest on knees but now on thighs. No longer on the waist but more on the curve of hips or high up on the rib cage near the chest. Everything was taken in stride, the older everyone got the more common it was and no one questioned a thing about it. It was mostly friendly, being so used to being near JJ for years that the change in touches barely registered in your head, it was all normal.
It changed almost a year ago. The feelings you held for JJ getting to be too much to control, you felt they were getting more and more noticeable every day. JJ was getting closer and closer, lingering longer than usual, snapping quicker when someone offended you, acting a bit more possessive and it was a lot to process. One night, after a particularly large fight with the Kooks, you and JJ were alone on the hammock outside The Chateau when he kissed you. It was a real kiss, one with emotion and fervor, not just a friendly peck that you’d gotten so used to sharing.
You guys have been dating ever since. Keeping it to yourself. You share everything else with the group, nothing was ever private but this was something you wanted to yourselves. To enjoy with no pressure. It was only supposed to be that way for a few months, while you got used to the change in relationship, but you got so comfortable with the way you guys got to have each other in private, you just never mentioned it.
But with how deeply you loved each other, it was obviously getting harder to hide. Not that it’s really that important.
“I’m cal-“
“Are you guy-“
“What the fuck!”
JJ, Pope, and Sarah all speak at the same time but everyone focuses on Sarah’s distressed, ‘what the fuck,’ and looks to her. Everyone then follows her line of sight and what’s caught her attention. JJ immediately tenses and he sits back, ready to jump up. You tense yourself, pushing harder into your hold on him.
“Rafe, what the fuck are you doing here?” Sarah screeches standing up. John B follows her. Kie and Pope stand too, standing more in front of you and JJ.
“Let me go,” JJ whispers, his voice coming out harsh, especially when Topper pops up from behind Rafe.
JJ huffs, an annoyed sigh heaving through his nose. His vision is locked on the two boys approaching your group. “We just wanted to check up on our favorite people,” Rafe jokes, the sarcasm rolling off of him in waves. You move completely around in front of JJ when you feel his body start to shake a bit at his continued words, “Especially the one who beat up my boy here.”
Wrapping your legs around JJ’s waist, you pull him closer to you before grasping his face in your hands. “Hey baby, how are you today?” you question, whispering to not gain the attention of everyone else. Pope and Kie are doing a decent job of keeping you hidden but JJ’s eyes are still locked on where Rafe and Topper are standing.
“Which one of you did it? He won’t tell me and I’d like to have a word.”
A twitch goes through JJ’s body, like he’s about to get up but you hold him tighter. Stroking your fingers through his hair, you tug on it a bit to get his attention. It works. “It’s okay.”
“None of you look like you got your asses handed to them, so I ask again. Who did it?” Rafe hums, clicking his tongue as you assume he looks around at everyone. You know that you and JJ aren’t completely covered and he’s bound to finally see you two.
“Rafe, just leave.” Sarah intervenes.
“Oh, Daddy’s little princess, I don’t think so. Not until someone steps up. I might even hang out with you today. I think it would be fun.”
“No, leave them alone. You come for them enough without reason. Go home!” Her voice is stern but Rafe is off the walls, you highly doubt he’ll listen. “Topper deserved what happened to him anyway.”
“Ah,” Rafe lets out, “So you know who did it? You think she’ll own up to it any time soon, I’m tired.”
You wince when JJ roughly grabs you and shoves you away from him. The movement makes you tumble into the back of Kie’s legs and she helps you up as JJ pushes to the front of the group, in the blink of an eye. You let out a groan as you get steady on your feet, your back burning with pain.
John B slaps a hand down on JJ’s shoulder as he steps in front of him, to keep him from attacking. You let out a sigh and shake your head as JJ puffs out his chest, making himself seem bigger. “Why don’t you leave her out of this,” his tone is menacing.
“Oh! You know who did it too?” Rafe exclaims, feigning ignorance.
“Rafe, I told you it’s not a big deal. Let’s go.” Topper interjects.
“No, man.  Look at the bruise on your neck. Someone just doesn’t get away with that. Even if they’re a girl,” Rafe finishes, looking directly at you. You stare back, unimpressed, arms crossed over your chest.
JJ lunges for Rafe, “Keep her out of it!”
Rafe laughs as John B and Pope hold JJ back, “But it’s her fault!”
“Not when he’s all over her first! Come on, Top, be a big man and admit it was your fault!” JJ taunts, struggling against the hold JB and Pope have on him.
You sigh once more before stepping out of Kie’s grip, she squeezes you for a second but let’s you go when you keep walking. Stepping in between JJ and Rafe, your chest brushes his, and you challenge him. You want to protect JJ in this moment because you know if a fight was to break out, JJ wouldn’t have it fair because looking past Rafe’s shoulder you spot the rest of their little gang.
“Get out of the way,” JJ yells, placing a hand to your waist. His fingers squeeze into your side but you don’t back down.
“No, JJ!” you yell back, “this is something you can’t fight over. I told you that!”
JJ presses his chest to your back, trying to get as close as possible to the situation but you push back. “Damn it, let me do something!”
You ignore him, turning to Rafe who has a smug expression on his face from the exchange, “Leave. This has nothing to do with you!”
Sarah steps you beside you and shoves at her brother, making him stumble. “Go home.”
“Sarah, this has nothing to do with you.”
You take a step forward, “And it doesn’t with you, either. I’d leave before you end up like your buddy.” Your temper is rising very quickly. The continuous smug look on his face from not listening to you or his own sister making your skin crawl. Your blood is hot and you can feel yourself vibrating in JJ’s hold, the taunting of his words and the way he speaks them as if he’s demeaning you.
“Like you co-“ you don’t even let him finish before you’re throwing a punch across his face, hard. He falls to the ground with the force of it and you’re about to lurch forward to continue throwing punches but arms wrap around your waist and pull you back. Your legs kick up in the air as you fight against the hold, “You bitch!”
Sarah jumps in between you and her brother, knowing he wouldn’t hit her. “Rafe, leave,” but he just shoved her aside and tried to get to you. You’re still fighting in JJ’s hold, yelling at him to let you go but he just continues to pull you away. Topper jumps in to keep Rafe back, desperately trying to get him to listen. For once Topper is doing something smart.
“Let me fight him!” You scream, tired of him and all his friends constantly looking down at you like you’re no more than a piece of garbage on the ground. It’s tiring, frustrating, and you’re absolutely sick of it. You’re tired of having to constantly be on alert, wondering if you’re going to get attacked again just because you’re hanging out somewhere or walking down the street. “Let me go!”
“No!” JJ yells back, “if you won’t let me fight, you’re not going to either!”
“I’m not letting you fight because I don’t want you in jail, asshole!” You’re still struggling against him but his hold is too tight and you’re losing air. “I’m just trying to protect you, god damn it, let me do something for you!”
In your fit of rage you don’t even notice that JJ has dragged you both a few feet away from everyone else until he’s in front of you, hands grasping at your face, “Hey hey hey, will you calm down? Breathe, calm down, baby.”
“JJ, let me go!” You exclaim, still trying to pull away from his grasp. It bothers the bruise on your face but you ignore it. You just want to fight, to attack anything that puts JJ in danger. You’re not too sure where this sudden wave of protectiveness came from, granted you always want to protect him, but it’s a really strong urge these past few days.
“No, calm down. I’m not letting you go until you’re breathing properly again.” JJ argues. He soothes his thumbs over your cheeks but you’re barely registering them there. Your mind is still reeling, wanting to do anything to fight, to keep JJ safe and with you. “What is going on with you? Why do you want to fight so bad? You’re not one to fight.”
The questions seem to drain the fight right out of you, the adrenaline running through your system leaving your body in a single breath. It makes you sag against JJ, his hands on your cheeks the main thing keeping you up. “I don’t know.”
“Come on, dig a little. I need an answer so we can work on moving forward.” JJ throws your own words back at you. You smile a little at him, happy that he’s grasping onto the tactics you use to get him to open up about what he’s going through. JJ notices you smile and chuckles, “Yeah, yeah I listen to you after all.”
That makes you full on laugh, your whole body shaking as the laugh rips through you. Reaching up, you rest a hand to his cheek, “You’re so stubborn, I’m a bit surprised.” He leans into your touch a bit, eyes closing as he takes in a deep breath. Your laughter dies down and you just smile at him. “The idea of you not being with me, scares me.”
JJ frowns and steps closer, as if either of you would disappear if he wasn’t close enough. “I just-“ you breathe out when he places your free hand on his ribs, your place of comfort, your grounding place. “I just want to do something for you. I want you to be safe. I want to protect you.”
“Have you not realized that’s what you’ve been doing for me since we were like 9?” JJ laughs, shaking his head. “Baby, you’ve been the one protecting me for years. How many times have you taken the blame for something when you weren’t even there? How many times have you hid me in your closet so your parents don’t find out I’ve sneaked in after a particularly bad day with my dad? How many times have you patched me up and held me when things got too bad? It’s too many to count. You do things for me every day. You smiling at me, holding my hand, sitting beside me, sharing food with me, looking at me, hell just being in the same room as me; gets me through any day.”
The four others stare on in a bit of a daze. Rafe and his followers long gone so their attention has been solely on the two of you. But there’s no way either of you could’ve known. Emotions are running high between you and JJ that there’s no way you’d pay attention to anything other than him until you knew his mind was steady. You knew JJ was going through the same thing.
“Are they like.... together?” Sarah questions, to no one in particular. She always just assumed the two of you were just closer. That your friendship was just that, a friendship. She’s noticed that the entire group of Pogues were close and touchy, but it was always a bit more between the two of you.
“Yeah,” Pope answers.
Sarah gasps, “Why didn’t I know!”
“Because we don’t even know,” John B answers.
“What do you mean?” Sarah’s brows furrow. That has got to be one of the most confusing things she’s ever been told. “That doesn’t make sense.”
“They haven’t told us,” Kie shrugs, “But, I mean, it’s obvious. I figured it out like six months ago maybe?”
“Really?” Pope, raises an eyebrow. “I figured it out like 3 months ago.”
“Mmm,” John B hums, “I’m pretty sure I witnessed their first official kiss. You know how she kisses all of us?” he asks, looking around to the others. Kie and Pope nod while Sarah just watches on. “Well, one night, like last year some time. I saw them kiss and it wasn’t like the ones she gives all of us. Their dynamic changed the next day.”
Sarah looks around completely baffled. She feels like she should’ve known, should’ve realized but she just assumed because no one acted like you two were dating. But she didn’t grow up with you all, she hasn’t seen how the two of you dating wouldn’t be a shock. And the newfound information still doesn’t stop Sarah from letting out a gasp when you surge forward to kiss JJ.
The kiss is like the one you shared yesterday but this time it’s you pouring everything you’ve got into it. Pouring in every ounce of love your body has to offer. It’s deep and warm and all things good. It’s needy and greedy, needing to have his attention and wanting to take it all. He reciprocates with just as much fervor, hastily kissing back like his life depended on it. His hands are tight on your waist as he pulls you impossibly closer, always closer, and your arms wrap around his neck. Hands shoved in his hair, you kiss him with unrelenting fury. It’s a kiss that could easily turn into something more if you weren’t in public so you try to tone it down but JJ is having none of that. He just wraps both arms around your back and holds you to him when you try to pull away.
You step back though, breathing heavily against JJ’s lips. Your breaths mix with his and your lips desperately brush as you both just breathe, trying to come back to earth. You place a quick kiss to his lips and one to his nose, “I love you, you know.”
“I know,” he responds with a quick kiss to your lips and your nose.
The van is entirely too tense for your liking. The atmosphere is so thick, it makes it feel like you can’t breathe. John B is yelling profusely at JJ as he drives, like he’s part of a car chase, through the back roads of The Cut to get to where his brain has focused on.
It was a pretty normal day up until about 26 minutes ago.
You were the last one to be picked up for the day, JJ greeting you at the sliding door of the van with a quick hello kiss to your lips before grabbing your hand and helping you in. Kisses got placed on everyone, even Sarah -who was pleasantly surprised, because even if she won’t admit it, she was upset to find out that you’ve kissed everyone but her- before sitting down on the floor in front of the bench. JJ sat behind you and you wrapped your arms around his legs. All of you were going to head out to the boat, spend the day on the water and soak up some sun. Just hang out like teenagers are supposed to do.
That was until a supposed cop car pulled up behind the van out of nowhere and ordered for you to pull over. John B does as told but in the blink of an eye, there’s a shot gun being aimed in his face and orders are being thrown for everyone to get out. Orders thrown for us to lay down flat in the ditch.
Something about knowing Rafe and how he’s going after people to collect money he owes. JJ was constantly telling him that you’re all a bunch of Pogues, that he won’t find anything but of course he found the cash you keep in your backpack, along with the weed you hold for JJ. There were a few other things he found that he deemed good enough to steal but you didn’t get enough of a look to see what he found. It’s like he noticed every time one of you moved because he’d be quick to aim the gun at any of you who moved and threaten to shoot.
Which is why it was so surprising when JB was able to get into the car without the guy noticing. After that, it was amazing how fast the guy ended up on the ground, wheezing and groaning in pain.
“Oh, I know this guy! He sells coke to my dad!” JJ yelled before he kicked him in the stomach.
“No wonder he was talking about Rafe.” Sarah interjected, scoffing in disbelief.
JJ punched the guy across the face once more before reaching into his pocket and taking the guys wallet. “We have one more stop to make!” he laughs menacingly.
So, that leads you up to where you are now. Pacing the front lawn of a run down drug house. Crashes are coming from inside, along with the yells and screams from JJ and John B. Every time something hits the ground, you startle, completely on edge by the whole situation. JJ has damn near lost his mind, his eyes too wide and too unfocused. If you didn’t know any better you’d say he did a line of coke for breakfast this morning.
Deep down, you know this behavior is only fueled by the way he’s been treated his whole life. That he’s reached his limit at how much he can actually take. That he’s fed up with his life and what he feels like he’s worth. He’s snapped, something you’ve been trying to prevent for years, and there’s absolutely nothing you can do about it. You’re not scared of him, you know that you’d be able to calm him down but you know there’d be a fight before that happened. A fight you don’t want to go through. It’s only been four days since your fight with Topper and you’re still exhausted from it. You’re not ready to handle a fight with JJ.
“God, they sound like they’re killing each other in there,” Kie groans, pacing just as much as you. She looks worried.
Pope stands completely still, an anxious look on his face as he stares at the front door of the house. It looks like he believes he’ll summon them out with just his gaze in the door.
And Sarah, well, she just looks out of place.
You continue to pace, anxiously waiting, not daring to look at the door. You don’t want to know what’s going on. You wish you couldn’t hear what was going on either. You honestly feel like you’re going to wear a path down in the dead grass with all your back and forth.
“Now!” you jump at the sudden voice before the screen door to the house slams open. JJ steps out with a wad of cash in his hands. “We can all have, let’s see-“ he pauses for a second as he sorts through the stack, “5 grand each!”
John B looks aggravated, like he’s talking to a child that keeps asking ‘why’ for absolutely no reason, as he follows closely behind JJ.
“What are we doing! Stealing from drug dealers now?” Kiara exclaims.
JJ stares at her, throwing his arms around. “Aren’t you guys tired of this? We got a gun! A gun pulled on us today. We were robbed! Us!” JJ exclaims, face red. “I don’t know about you but I’m tired! I’m tired of being treated like absolute shit just because of where we live!”
You stare on in complete shock. JJ’s lips are parted and his eyes are wide, breathing ragged. This is a whole other type of anger that you’ve never seen out of JJ before. You’re not too sure how to handle this.
“Relax, JJ,” John B continues after him, his anger showing through as well. He starts pushing up against JJ, getting in his face.
“How’d you feel, huh? That shit was right there in your face,” JJ argues back.
“I’m putting it back,” John B moves to snatch the bag JJ has in his grasp and that leads to JJ shoving JB up against the van, hard. The impact of it echoes around the small area you’re in.
“You feel like a tough guy, huh?” John B snaps, not even trying to fight against the hold JJ has on him. He knows that JJ would never lay a hand on him, no matter how mad he got. “What will you do when he comes for us?”
“We punch him, in the throat,” JJ retorts, his voice coming out low and threatening. It does fit with JJ, he shouldn’t be capable of getting his voice to sound like that.
JB scoffs, “Oh, good fuckin’ idea, JJ.”
JJ steps back, a relieving sigh coming from you as he does, “I’m not putting it back,” he mutters and shoves past JB and gets into the van. From your vantage point, you can’t see him inside. You’re still so shocked to the spot, you can’t move. It’s only a few seconds of everyone just standing around before he gets back out. “What!?” he snaps.
“We’re sick of your shit.”
That seems to get you to snap out of whatever trance you’re in. You finally look away from JJ and look at everyone else. The worried look on Pope’s face, at his best friend's obvious breakdown. The indifference Sarah radiates because she doesn’t know JJ enough to feel any other way. The anger in John B’s stance as he looks at his best friend and the recklessness he’s showing. The disbelief on Kiara’s face as she looks at JJ like she’s never seen him before, “Yeah, you’re pulling guns out on people shit.”
“JJ come on man, put it back,” Pope tries to reason but JJ just snaps.
“Pope, come on! I took the fall for you, I owed 30k in restitution. The charges may drop but they can still sue me for that money. Might as well be ahead of the game!”
“I didn’t ask you to do that!” Pope exclaims.
“Yeah, well I did. Sorry for caring.” JJ mutters, looking around to everyone. He misses your frame, like he forgot you were even with them. “You know what? I’m just going to go by myself.”
All you do is watch as JJ starts to walk away, his head is down and you can see the hurt in his face as he walks by.  The mask he holds up every day, faltering as soon as he can’t be seen anymore. He meets your eye and the wild anger that was there seconds ago is gone, all that’s left is watery eyes and disappointment. You take a step towards him, to give him the comfort he needs to get through this but he just shakes his head and keeps walking.
“JJ!” Pope hell’s out but it falls on deaf ears, JJ continuing his trek out of the area.
“Just let him go.” JB sighs, “let him do his thing.”
It’s quiet, so quiet you can hear the wind in the trees rustling each leaf, as JJ walks out of sight. It doesn’t take long for the last few minutes to settle into your brain and leave your blood running hot. When you turn away from where JJ had gone, you see everyone looking to you for some sort of guidance. They know you’re the only one that can successfully bring JJ back to earth, back to the present and out of his head. It’s been that way for years now. They just look at you helplessly, like you have all the answers. And you don’t.
It makes you angrier. It angers you that JJ did this. That he snapped and decided it would be a good idea to rob someone, a drug dealer at that. You would’ve much rather dealt with him getting into another fight with someone over having to deal with stolen money.
And it makes you angry that his best friends are apparently sick of him. It doesn’t sit right with you in the slightest.
“I can believe you guys,” you shake your head at them.
John B looks taken aback by your words, “Us!?”
“You can’t sit here and tell us you support him for what he just did!” Kie yells at you, stepping forward.
“Of course not!” You shake your head, “but I’m not going to sit here and shit on someone who is already down. JJ doesn’t deserve you guys to be talking to him like that, like you’re sick of him. That boy does everything he can to get things right with you guys. You mean so much to him and you’re just going to shit on him for it?”
“He’s robbing drug dealers, y/n.” Pope tries to reason but you just shake your head at him.
“One that just threatened to kill, each and every one of you.” You argue back, “Yes, stealing probably wasn’t the best thing he could’ve done and I’ll try and get it back so we don’t get into anymore fucking trouble. But, for you guys to turn on him the second he does something you don’t agree with is a bit fucked.”
You step towards them again, not realizing you were so far away from the group to begin with, “Pope, I know you didn’t ask him to, but he just took the fall for you so you wouldn’t lose your scholarship opportunity. He told me it’s because he’s not worth more than jail time, that you have so much more to look forward to than him.”
“Kie, who was the first person to accept you back into the group after you wanted to experience life as a kook? It was JJ. He sat there multiple nights, telling us that you haven’t changed, that you’d still be the same Kiara you were before. The one that’s understanding and supportive of everyone’s reckless behavior.”
“And John B,” you frown, “JJ was the one that was there for you when your dad went missing. He held you through the nights, made you eat and drink water. Did everything in his power to bring you out of your pain, while he was going through his own set of pain. He made sure you didn’t lose yourself when you lost your dad.”
“And for me? He’s been there for me through so much shit, quick to smile just so I would smile back. He could be in so much physical and emotional pain but he’s the first person to smile. The first person to crack a joke. The first person to offer comfort just because he doesn’t want people to feel what he feels from someone who is supposed to care for him. He may act like a jackass or someone who is tough and happy but he’s not. He’s really not.”
“You guys don’t see the way that mask falls off as soon as he’s alone. You don’t see how he beats himself up over the tiny details of his life. How he views himself as nothing more than a piece of trash for not being able to stand up to his dad. How he thinks he’s going to end up just like him. He’s scared, terrified of losing us. It’s why he’s so quick to fight, to protect, to make sure we’re happy. We’re literally the only thing, the only good thing, he has in his life. And you hurt him today.”
You hang your head after your rant, the weight of your words leaving you feeling empty after having said them. Your shoulders ache a bit but it’s still quiet. “I know, none of us agree with the stealing of the money. It was stupid and dangerous. But you didn’t have to tell him that you’re tired of him. You could’ve let Pope follow him like he wanted, to show him that he’s not alone.”
“Well, you didn’t follow him either.” Sarah steps in.
“He told me not to. I respect him for that. He knows what he did was a bit much. He wants to calm down, he was just mad that we all could’ve just died.” You shrug, looking around to everyone. They all look a bit guilty, realizing what it is that they just insinuated to their best friend.
“We didn’t mean it in a bad way,” John B says, running his hands through his hair like he’s stressed. And he is.
“Yeah, but do you think he’ll take it that way?” You question, eyebrow raised.
“We just want him to calm down.”
You nod, “I get that but you could’ve gone at it another way. That’s just me though. I’m gonna go home though. Be there just in case.”
Before they have a chance to say anything you walk away, in the opposite direction of JJ because you live in opposite directions. And that sudden thought makes your heart drop at the realization that JJ might try and go home. To show his dad that he can do something right, that he can get the money to pay off his debts.
You don’t hear from JJ for the rest of the day. Just your unread message of I know, to his I love you, you know, that he sent a few minutes after he left the group in the afternoon.
You didn’t see JJ until the following night. And when you did you kinda wished you hadn’t. You wish he hadn’t gone missing for over 24 hours. You wish you’d seen him all day and that this wasn’t the first time you were seeing him. As soon as your eyes landed on him, you knew something was wrong. Something went terribly wrong.
You and Kie had been together all day, running errands and shopping, picking up things for the movie night, dinner, at the Chateau. The Pogues all decided it would be a good idea because you knew that JJ would show up and they wanted to apologize to him. Everyone was worried about him, having not been able to locate him since he’d gone off the walls. But you knew him, you knew no matter how upset he gets about his friend, he’ll always come back to them. Always.
“I’m really worried about JJ,” Kie had said at one point. The two of you were picking up his favorite candy when she said it, looking forlorn into the shopping cart.
You felt her pain, but you shrugged nonchalant anyway, not wanting to alarm her with just how worried you were. If you were overly -which you were- worried about JJ then everyone knows it’s bad, “Shit happens in friend groups, Kie.”
She looked like she was close to tears, “But we’re not a normal friend group. We’re family.”
You nodded at her and held her in the middle of the market.
Now you felt like you were the one that needed to be held.
The sight in front of you was wrong. It didn’t belong in front of you. It didn’t belong anywhere near here yet, here it was staring you right in the face. You want to close your eyes and when you open them back up, you want it to be gone but you knew that wasn’t going to happen. Your heart is lodged in your throat and it was going to stay there until you knew everything was going to be okay.
“What did you do, JJ?” Pope gasps, in absolute disbelief as the three of you come up on JJ sitting in a hot tub, surrounded by hundreds of Christmas lights.
JJ looks up and scans over you, Kie, and Pope. You can barely see his eyes over the brim of his sunglasses. Why is he wearing sunglasses at night? You’re not too sure. “Oh, good you’re here. Come on, you have to get in right now! I have a jet going in my butt!”
He’s drunk, overly so, but that doesn’t stop him from drinking the champagne in his hands, right out of the bottle. Pope just drops his jaw, “How much did all this cost?”
“Well when you look at it; the generator, petrol, lights.. I don’t know? All of it?”
“All of it!?”
“All of it.”
“You spent all that money in one day?” Pope exclaims, leaning forward in his spot. It sounds like he doesn’t believe it. Like he doesn’t even want to.
“Yeah, burned a whole right through my pocket!” JJ waves his hand flippantly like it’s not a big deal. When it is. “But I mean, like, look, come on guys look at all of this.”
His voice is too high. It’s tight and too pitched to sound normal. To sound like he’s not seconds away from snapping. It brings tears to your eyes as you watch from the sidelines. Watch as your boyfriend crumbles right before you.
“Kie, what?” JJ says, causing you to look to her. She looks pained, absolutely shattered. “I mean,” JJ laughs but it’s anything but joyful. It sounds just as pained as Kiara’s face looks. “Can’t a man have a little luxury in life?”
He waves his hands dramatically. Showing off what he’s done outside of the Chateau, desperately looking for approval. That what he did was the right thing. “All this, scrapin’,” he trails off, as he rips off the sunglasses. “Come on, guys,” he looks around again, his eyes lingering on yours a bit longer before looking to the water. “I mean, like, guys, we-“ his voice cracks and he takes a desperate breath in. You find yourself copying his breath. “You only live once, right?” His hand comes up out of the water as he limply holds up one finger. Like the movement is too much for him.
The look on JJ’s face as he makes eye contact again screams sadness. Screams validation. He wants, so desperately for you to agree with him, for all of you to agree with him. But he doesn’t realize everyone is on the verge of tears, the breakdown too much for anyone to handle. His face wobbles a bit and you can see it pinch up through the steam around him. He’s seconds away from tears.
When no one responds, he does his best to wipe away the emotions. He fails. But he shakes his head and keeps going, “Enough of this emotional shit. Come on, get in.”
“We’re not-“
JJ cuts Kie off in a second, “Come on, get in! I almost forgot! There’s a disco mode.”
Fountains of water spit out across the surface and different colored lights shine through each arch. JJ smiles triumphantly and throws his arms up in the air, leaning back against the side of the hot tub again.
“Are you kidding me!” Pope shouts and your tears fall at how fast JJ’s face paints his disappointment. “You could’ve done anything else with the money.”
“You could’ve given it to charity!” Kie interjects, sounding a bit annoyed now. JJ turns his head to the side and rubs at his eyes. His breathing is calculated and you just know he’s doing whatever he can to stop from crying.
“Better yet,” Pope exclaims, “You could’ve given it back!”
“Ok, well you know what!” JJ yells, “I didn’t-“ he stands up and the ground almost falls out from underneath you at the sight, “I didn’t do that! I got a hot tub!”
Your hands shake against your face, just as much as JJ’s voice shakes. The deep, dark, bruises littering his abdomen and ribs, glues you to the spot. You can’t do anything but gape at him. When did this happen and why hadn’t he come to you, to anyone. Where did he go when he was clearly not okay, mentally and physically. Kie and Pope just stare, clearly not knowing what to do with themselves and most likely thinking the same exact thing. JJ just keeps clambering on, like he didn’t just shake the very ground you stand on.
“For my friends! Actually no, screw friends, for my family. I got a hot tub for my family!” His voice is shaky and still too high pitched. He looks and sounds frantic as he keeps moving back and forth in the hot tub.
“JJ, what the hell?” Kie cries out, trying to interrupt him.
If he hears her, he ignores her, “Look at what I did for us! I did this for us! So we can be a family!”
“JJ,” She tries again.
“No,” JJ holds up a hand, shaking his head desperately. “No, stop. Stop being emotional. It’s fine, okay?”
The way the word okay flies out of his mouth, fast and unsteady. The quiver his lips make around the word, breaks the spell that was put on your body. You work on taking off your shoes as fast as possible. Not once looking away from JJ as he bows his head and sucks in deep breaths through his teeth.
You pull off your last sock as he starts talking again, “It’s sweet? Yeah?”
You crash into him as he cries out, “Just get in.”
Wrapping your arms around him, you pull him into you, like you have many times before, and the movement punches a sob right out of him. He leans his entire body weight onto you and just sobs. It only takes a few seconds before you feel another pair of arms. “I just couldn’t take it!” he sobs.
His body shakes against yours and he holds onto you so tight it knocks the wind out of you a bit, “I can’t take him anymore!” The sobs hit at full force, leaving him breathless. “I almost killed him.”
You hold on a bit tighter, running your hands up and down his back. You’re trying to force every ounce of comfort you have in your body into his. Feed him what he so desperately craves. “I just want to do the right thing.” he cries out, sounding so small and vulnerable it shatters your heart into pieces.
“I know,” you and Kie whisper at the same time. You’re glad she’s here. Pope comes in next, his arms wrapping around everyone. JJ lets out a sigh as three pairs of arms wrap around him before he lets out another sob. His weight being held up by the three of you. “I know.”
You’re not too sure how long you’re there, standing in the middle of the hot tub, just listening to JJ sob but you know it’s more than half an hour before John B walks up, startling everyone a bit. JJ has calmed down enough and is just being held while he sniffles every once in a while. But his sobs come back as soon as John B asks, “What the fuck is all this?”
John B looks alarmed and quickly let’s go of Sarah to climb into the hot tub, immediately wrapping the group up in his arms. Once he’s here, knowing that there’s a stronger force, you let out your cries. It hurts to see JJ in so much pain, to see him suffering so much. You want to protect him from everything. You want to go to his dad and fight him, make him hurt the way your boyfriend does. But doing that would do nothing to help JJ. If you were to get hurt on JJ’s behalf, once again, but by his dad he’d never forgive himself. And that would hurt him even more.
You want to hold the broken boy in your arms until he’s pieced back together and is never in any pain ever again. But you know that’s not possible, that’s not something that can logically happen.
But what you can do is help him get out of physical pain. Help him get comfortable and hold him until he sleeps. Hold him until he receives the love and comfort he wants and needs. And that’s something you will always do.
“We should get out,” you whisper but everyone hears you. Even Sarah, seeing as she rushes forward to start helping you guys out. After a few moments it’s only you and JJ, the rest hovering around the steps to make sure you can get him out. He clutches on a little tighter when you try to step back, “JJ, baby, come on. We’re gonna get out.”
He nods a bit, his lips brushing the skin of your neck briefly, before he pulls away. He doesn’t go very far before he rests his forehead against yours, blinking languidly at you. He looks so tired and it rips your heart to shreds. A deep breath fans out across your face and his eyes close as he pushes his forehead heavier into yours. You stroke his cheeks and place a kiss to the corner of his mouth, running a comforting hand through his hair.
“Come on, baby, let’s go.” He nods his head once more and moves away. You grab his hand and four other hands reach out to help him out. John B gets his free hand first and basically picks him up and out of the hot tub. Once he’s steady on the ground, he immediately turns back to you, watching you get out. He looks so hopeless, young, vulnerable, and seconds away from crumbling to the ground. It only takes you a few seconds to have him in your arms again and moving towards the house.
“I’ll start dinner,” Kie murmurs, nodding towards the bathroom. You smile gratefully at her and shuffle towards the bathroom while the others move into the kitchen. They give you all curious glances before they’re out of sight and you’re alone with JJ.
You sit him down on the toilet and move around to get the shower started. Getting a glass of water from the sink you shove it in his hands and make him drink it. Once he’s done, you fill it up again and give it back with some pain medicine this time. He finishes it quickly and looks up to you. His eyes are watery and red, his bottom lip trembling. You’re not much better, you caught a glance of yourself in the mirror, but you try to hold it in for him. He continues to look at you as you brush your thumbs over his cheekbones, under his eyes, and move a hand through his hair.
“I’m sorry,” he whispers, his bottom lip quivering once again. You start to shake your head, shaking it the whole way down as you try to place a shaky kiss to his lips. He doesn’t kiss back. “No, stop it. I don’t deserve it. I fucked up.”
“JJ, no-“
He cuts you off with an abrupt shake to his head. “No! I did. I fucked up. I always fuck up. My anger gets to me and I’m sorry. You don’t deserve someone who is going to fly off the walls every time something goes wrong. I robbed a fucking drug dealer for fucks sake! And I didn’t even give the money to something good, I wasted it all. All of it.”
JJ let’s out a painful cry as his body deflates, his head coming to rest on your stomach. “I can't do anything right.”
“You were scared of us dying, baby, it’s a decent reason to fly off the walls,” you try to reason but he just vehemently shakes his head.
“No, you shouldn’t be with someone like me!”
“JJ, please. We went over this a few days ago!”
“And look at what all has happened since then. You fought Topper and got hurt because of it. You still have the black eye and the limp from your leg being fucked up! We almost got killed, I robbed a drug dealer, I got beat up by my dad and I almost killed him! Can’t you see how fucked up this is. You don’t need to be here with us! With me!”
You let out a choked sob as he stands up, pushing you out of the way. It's getting steamy in the bathroom, too hot, and it’s making it even harder for you to breathe. JJ looks at you with his own tears in his eyes, “I can’t keep putting you through this.”
“No!” you cry out, hiccuping at the force of it. “No, JJ! I have been with you since I was 9! Nothing has fucking changed! We’ve always loved each other, we just kiss now! You’re not going to end this just because you feel like you’re not worth it! If you weren’t worth it, I wouldn’t have stuck around as long as I have!”
Your chest is heaving and you feel like you’re on the verge of a panic attack. You need to get out of here. Shaking your head, you back up to the door, “Shower, JJ. I’ll put fresh clothes on the sink for you.”
JJ’s entire face crumbles and his shoulders slump forward as if you took every ounce of energy out of him. “I-“
“No, shower.
Stumbling out of the bathroom, arms wrap around you as soon as you’re in the hallway. They’re strong and familiar and you break down as soon as they hold you to their chest. Kie is in front of you a few moments later, cupping your face in her hands and trying anything she can to get you to focus on her. Your breathing is too harsh and your vision is spotty. The next thing you know, your legs are barely holding you up and then you’re on the ground. John B holds you to him and he tries to get you to breathe properly.
It’s all too much. The events of the last few days finally catching up to you and breaking through the surface at full force. JJ getting hurt, twice, by his dad. The Pogues almost dying. JJ stealing a large amount of money. JJ trying to end it, twice in the same week, just because he’s feeling so low. It’s all too much and you just don’t know what to do. The love you hold for JJ, for this entire group, outweighs anything in your life. There’s no way in hell you’d ever be without them. No matter what you go through with them. You choose them every day of your life. It’s never been any other way. Ever.
Kie is still in front of you, her hands still holding onto your face. Her thumbs are swiping across your face and she’s trying to say something but you’re not picking up on it. Blood is rushing through your ears and pounding around in your head. Absolutely no other noise is coming through so you just shake your head, anything to let them know you can’t hear them. Kie seems to understand and she places your hands on her chest, keeping them there. It takes you a few seconds but you realize she’s trying to get you to copy her breathing.
It works. You start to follow her. Follow her hand movements and feel her breathing under your hands. Soon, you can hear everything once more. Kie praising you, John B trying to soothe you, Pope’s voice mumbling from somewhere in the distance, Sarah talking a bunch of nonsense but calming nonsense.
“I’m okay. Everything’s fine. Just lost my breathing there for a second.” You mumble, sitting up a bit. Kie reaches out to you quickly when you sway in your spot a bit. You do feel a bit dizzy. “I’m fine. Just tired.”
“Come on, let’s get you some food and water,” John B says, hoisting you up with him as he stands. “You know JJ isn’t going anywhere. He’s not going to break up with you.”
You nod, “I know. It still panics me to hear it.”
Sarah comes up next with the food you and Kie had bought earlier in the day and a glass of water. You smile thankfully at her and sit down at the dining room table, not making any movement to eat it. John B sits down in front of you and places a hand on your knee, “Has this happened before?”
“Mm, remember that time about 5 months ago when I didn’t come around for a few days? Right after the first time JJ’s dad beat on him in months?”
Both Kie and John B nod. “JJ was unbearable to be around,” Kie groans.
An unamused chuckle falls past your lips and you shake your head, “Yeah.....” you trail off. “He told me that he wasn’t worth it. That he was too weak to be with me. That if he couldn’t even defend himself against his father then he wouldn’t be able to handle anything else, even a relationship. I told him to leave and only come back when he came to his senses. It was harsh but I needed him to realize the only thing that changed was that we kissed, now.”
“He’s scared of losing you,” John B states.
“He is,” you agree, “of all of us. He feels if he does it on his own terms, it’ll be ok. That we’ll leave if we think he’s weak. But he doesn’t always think like that, it’s only when he gets into it with his dad.”
It goes silent after that, the words sinking into everyone’s brains. You pick at your food a bit, eating a few bites as Kie puts together plates for everyone else. Sarah sits down beside John B and Kie comes to sit next to you, placing a comforting hand to your leg. Sending her a quick smile, you grab her hand and hold it to you. The conversation starts to pick up around you and you try to listen, you really do but your mind is just quiet. It’s blank to anything other than JJ.
Your heart aches at the thought of JJ being in pain. Physical or emotional pain. He does stupid things but he doesn’t deserve the things he goes through. There’s not much that he hasn’t gone through since the time you’ve met and you’d like to be able to protect him from the bad things of the world. No matter how often he tries to push you away when he feels like he doesn’t deserve the love.
“Okay,” Pope breathes out as he walks into the dining area. “He’s out of the shower,” he comments, resting a hand to your shoulder, “are you okay?”
Glancing around at everyone, they’re all staring at you expectantly. If you could guess, they’ve probably been staring at you long before Pope asked if you were okay. You nod and you’re about to give a more reassuring answer when you hear shuffling behind Pope. He turns around and you get a full few of JJ, he’s wrapped up in a hoodie that’s too big for him, his face is swollen and a bit blotchy. He looks like he would be twelve and it makes your heart clench in your chest, a lump forming in your throat at his glossy eyes.
He looks at you and only you, “Can we go to bed?” You look away and to your hands, to the one that Kie has wrapped firmly in hers. “I’ve calmed down, please?” When you look back up at him, the glossiness of his eyes is now watery with unshed tears. “Please?”
There’s absolutely no way in the world you’d ever be able to say no to such a sad boy. To the boy in general. JJ turns around as soon as you stand up and you don’t even think twice about following him. He gets into bed, turning his back to you and you follow. You wrap yourself around him, shoving an arm under his head and one around his waist. Both hands press flat into his chest as you mold yourself against his back. Knees to knees, chest to back, and JJ lacing your fingers together.
“I’m so sorry,” he whispers, placing a kiss to your fingers, “I know that you wouldn’t be with me unless I was worth it to you. I’m sorry that I get knocked down so much that I feel useless to everyone. Especially you. I never want to be anything less than enough for you.”
You press a kiss to the back of his neck, “You’ve always been enough for me, JJ. Always.” You pull on his shoulder a bit, trying to get him to turn over. When he does, you place a hand on his cheek, soothing over the skin there, “You’ve always been enough for me, JJ. You have nothing to apologize for. You’ve been beaten down your whole life, that is not your fault.”
A tear slips down his cheek and you wipe it away. The motion makes him press a kiss to your wrist. “You’re the person that keeps me going,” JJ whispers. “I’m nothing without you.”
“Don’t say that, JJ.” you shake your head. He’s so much more than that. So much more. “You’re caring, loving, protective, sympathetic, and empathetic. I’m just a perk to your qualities.”
That pulls a giggle out of JJ. A few tears slipping from his eyes at the surprise of laughter. You push forward to place a kiss to his lips. Loving the feeling of him actually kissing you back this time. He pushes in deeper, an arm around your waist, pulling your bodies flush. You kiss with so much intensity, it knocks you on your back and JJ follows, hovering over you as he kisses back with just as much. It makes your blood warm, makes you feel like you’re on fire as his free hand trails down over your waist, over your hip and to the back of your thigh to hitch it over his own hip.
The passion being exchanged is absolutely mind blowing, your brain short circuiting at the overwhelming feeling of love flowing between the two of you. It’s ardent and you want nothing more for it to continue but when you slip a hand over JJ’s ribs, he winces, sucking in a deep breath against your lips.
“I’m sorry,” you breathe out, quickly switching positions with him and pushing up his hoodie, “I forgot.”
“It’s okay. I definitely just forgot about them.” JJ wiggles his eyebrows at you as the hand on your thigh moves to caress the skin. “Let’s continue to forget about them.”
You place three quick, consecutive, sticky kisses to his lips before moving down to place one on his chin, to the base of his neck at his throat. Before placing delicate kisses over the battered skin of his torso. JJ’s breathing hitches in his throat and he lets out a watery sigh when your lips brush over the sensitive skin of his ribs. The hand on your thigh squeezes tightly at your movement, almost as a warning, but you ignore it and continue to sprinkle your love over the bruises on his skin. You know it won’t heal them but you can wish that it will.
A groan is punched out of JJ when your tongue lightly brushes over one of the bruises above his belly button and you chuckle a little bit. He’s turned into a bit of a heaving mess, gasping for air. You know it feels weird, like a mixture of pain and pleasure and JJ has no idea how to react to it. So, he just breathes heavily. He moves one hand to lace his fingers with yours as the other rests at the bottom of your spine.
Placing a few more kisses to the bruise over his right rib, you pull his hoodie back down over his stomach, and move up to place a few kisses on his neck. He moves his head to the side to give you some room and you suck a bruise into the juncture of his neck, right where it meets with his shoulder. A soft moan escapes him as you do. “There,” you kiss over your work when you pull away. “A good bruise to look at. One from love, not hate.”
The breath JJ lets out sounds more like a sob and he pushes into you once again. Wrapping his arms around you and shoving his face into your neck, he’s almost completely settled on top of you once he gets comfortable. He kisses at your skin, where he can reach, a few times and squeezes you as if you’re the only thing keeping him alive. You hold him back tightly, giving him the comfort he needs.
“I love you, you know,” he murmurs.
You kiss at his hairline, “I know.”
He doesn’t fall asleep until he repeats his I know, back to you.
JJ was finally feeling back to normal. The few days after his breakdown in the hot tub, things were a bit tense. A little too quiet for his liking. The day after, he laid in bed all day really only getting up to pee. He didn’t eat until you had come back to the Chateau, after doing something with your parents, and forced him to eat something. You had to basically force feed him to eat the food you made for him. He was grateful for you, you kept him together when all he wanted to do was break down. JJ was positive that there’d never be another person to care for him quite like you do.
Yesterday, the entire Chateau was empty when he woke up and it unsettled him a bit. It was never a good thing when it was quiet around there and he didn’t think he could handle anything else that was bad. He wandered around a bit, pulling on a hoodie because he didn't really want everyone else to stare him down, until he found everyone sitting at the hammocks. It was barely sunrise and he was confused as to why everyone was up already for no reason, and why they hadn’t woken him up either. You looked up from your spot in the hammock as he approached and held your arms out. He climbed in with you immediately and fell asleep only seconds later, to the sound of you quietly talking with Kie. The rest of the day was spent in bed with you, everyone giving him space to regroup. It was nice. He got kisses and other things that made him feel like himself.
Then today, everything is relatively back to how it should be. With loud laughter, stupid jokes, and sarcastic comments. Today is a day out on the HMS Pogue and JJ is absolutely loving it. There’s nothing he loves more than being out with his friends. With the people he loves and cares for the most as you all do stupid shit togeher. It’s his favorite thing. Also, to feel your skin against his, especially when it’s a bit warm and sweaty. That just feels nice. It's a major plus.
You’re currently resting against his side, his arm slung over your shoulder and his hand resting comfortably between your boobs. You’re laughing at something Sarah said and it’s probably the most relaxed he’s seen you in a few weeks. Your head thrown back, nearly resting on his clavicle and your hand slapping against his thigh. He wishes he was paying attention to what was being said, just so he could repeat it to see you laugh like this again. So carefree, the way that you should always be.
The sun is beating down harshly on everyone, making everyone sweat just a bit but no one seems uncomfortable by it. In fact everyone just settles in more, sitting in complete bathing suits and drinking beer.
“Did you guys really start dating? And not tell us?” Pope asks out of nowhere, completely unprompted. But the more he stares at Pope, the more he realizes he was just lazily kissing at the side of your neck where he just so happened to be resting his head.
“Yeah!” John B exclaims, resting back in the drivers seat of the boat, Sarah settling with him, “What the fuck is up with that?”
JJ shrugs, “Wanted to be able to mack on my girl in private.”
“JJ, shut up.” You laugh, sitting up and making him go with you. “We just wanted to make sure it was serious? I guess. Wanted to make sure that it wasn’t just silly feelings from knowing each other for so long. It would’ve felt different if everyone knew.”
“We wouldn’t have judged,” Kie says, leaning in with her elbows on her knees.
“It wasn’t about that,” You shake your head, “it was more like, nothing is really private with us. We share everything with each other. And this was something that needed to be figured out with just the two of us. Nothing really changed between us so then we just kinda forgot to mention it.”
JJ can’t help but wrap an arm around you. Kissing you the night that he did was the best decision he’s ever made in his life. He took a leap of faith and it was the right thing to do. The moment you kissed him back he knew that everything was right, nothing could ever be wrong about his decision. He had a feeling things were changing between the two of you for a few months. Jealousy was shining through when one or the other would end up flirting with someone at a party. Touches were getting more intimate and possessive. The flirting was getting more and more serious.
You have been a constant in his life since he was nine. Always the first person who was willing to listen to his crazy ideas or go on his absurd adventures. You were the first one he went to every time his dad hit him. The only person that ever saw him in that moment of vulnerability. And that’s still to this day. You’re the only person he trusts, truly trusts. He knows that you’d never turn against him with the things he’s told you, shown you. You have years of knowledge on him, and he you, that you could crush him in a heartbeat but he knows you never will. You’ll never betray him. Even if you weren’t in his life anymore, there’s no way you’d ever do that. He just knows.
And he doesn’t even want to think about that possibility. You not being in his life just doesn’t make sense. He doesn’t want to find out what it’d be like.
“You know, we’ve known for months.” Kie laughs, pulling JJ out of his thoughts.
You gasp at her words, “What? How?”
“I saw your guys’ first kiss.” John B smiles, looking all sorts of smug.
“I’m pretty sure you didn’t,” JJ chuckles, taking a sip of his beer. “It was at a party only we went to when we were 14.”
“Wait, what?” You question, turning to look at him.
JJ smirks, “Mhmm, remember the first time you smoked with me?” he looks to you for affirmation. When you nod, he continues, “Remember the game of truth or dare? You were dared to make out with the person you thought was the hottest. It was me.”
Your mouth drops open in shock, “Holy shit. That’s right. How could I forget?” The red suddenly tinting your cheeks is enough to make JJ’s heart skip a beat. To know he has such an affect on you, makes him feel good.
“You can’t handle your shit, baby,” he teases, leaning forward to flick at your forehead. You gasp and try to smack him but he grabs your wrist, leaning in to kiss you instead.
“Who knew they could get more annoying?” Pope groans. “You guys should’ve kept this to yourselves.”
“They were getting sloppy Pope,” Kie shrugs, “they wouldn’t have been able to hide it for much longer. You see the gross amount of love that oozes out of them when they look at each other.”
Everyone starts laughing but you just look at JJ and the look that's shining in your eyes is the same one they’re talking about. He knows the same thing must be reflecting in his own eyes because you lean forward and press a sweet kiss to his lips. On that he greedily accepts and returns. He smirks when he pulls away, placing a kiss to your forehead.
“So, John B what kiss did you see then?”
“One night in the hammock, like last year some time. I saw it and then the next days you guys were just different.” He shrugs, pulling Sarah into him some more.
You move into his side once again and look to Kie, “When did you notice?”
“Like six months ago?” She turns her head from side to side, trying to remember. “It was after breakfast at John B’s one morning. You guys thought you were alone in the kitchen. JJ was the one cleaning the kitchen, oddly, and you were on the counter by the sink. The way you were talking, it was about a date and you said that you loved each other but it was different than the way you’d usually say it. I left after that.”
JJ’s heart is starting to beat a little quicker in his chest. Something about talking about you or your relationship together just makes him excited. He loves it. He loves you.
“Saw the secret hand holding at The Wreck one afternoon. Thought it was weird, seeing as you held hands all the time. There was no need to hide it but your fingers were doing that soft caress thing, it was obvious.” He says the whole thing like he’s disinterested in the topic. It makes JJ laugh.
“I think it’s amazing how long you’ve all known each other.” Sarah smiles and it makes a smile appear on everyone’s face.
John B then decides it's time to move the boat, to go somewhere to swim. Everyone gets excited, standing up and removing any leftover clothing, while the boat is moving, so once it’s anchored the swimming can begin without any sort of hesitation. It was too hot out now.
But then the boat comes to an abrupt stop and a few high pitched screams fill JJ’s ears before a splash of water. He’s been jolted to the very front of the bow, hitting his head on the seat there. It takes him a moment to connect the dots before he stands up to make sure everyone is okay. Kie and Pope are a couple inches away from him, groaning as they sit back up. John B rubbing his head, clearly hitting it on the window in front of him. And Sarah regains her balance as she stands up from the bench behind John B. You were nowhere in sight.
“Y/n!” He yells out, scrambling to his feet. “Baby! Where’s y/n!”
That seems to knock everyone out of their stupor and scramble to their feet. “JJ!” you groan out just as he spots your hand on the side of the boat. A cry rips through you as JJ and Pope rush to try and pull you up into the boat. You rip yourself away from them before they even get a chance to reach you properly.
“Baby, what’s wrong? Come on, grab onto me!” JJ yells, trying to keep in his panic. He has no idea if you’re hurt or not and the fact that you’re crying isn’t helping settle him at all.
“JJ! Please get me out of this fucking water!” You yell out, reaching up for him once more.
He immediately bends down, the panic in your voice, making him desperate to get you into the boat. He hears everyone else yelling, asking what happened, wondering why you’re having such a hard time getting out on your own, asking if you’re okay. But he ignores them all, finally getting his hand in yours and reaching down below your elbow to haul you up. Pope on the other side doing the same. You crash into him and with the force of his movement to pull you up and over the edge, he falls back into the other side of the boat, you landing on top of him.
You cry out in pain and flinch away from him, “Holy shit,” Pope gapes as he helps sit you up.
“What!” JJ exclaims, sitting up, running his eyes all over your body to find what’s wrong. It doesn’t take long for him to land on the giant red mark covering almost the entirety of your abdomen. “Oh, fuck. A jellyfish got you?”
“What?” You gasp, looking down to where his attention is. Kie shoves a water into your hand and Sarah sits behind you, wrapping her arms across the top of your chest. “Fuck,” you sigh out when you catch sight of it.
“Did you not feel that?” John B asks and JJ looks up to him for a second before back to you, trying to catch your eye. If you didn’t feel that, something else must be wrong.
“No! I think my ankle is broken!” You yell out, startling JJ a bit. He trails his eyes down your body until he reaches your ankle and fuck. Yeah.
“That looks broken,” Pope voices his thoughts perfectly.
“What the fuck happened, John B?” JJ snaps, his anger getting to him quickly. You getting hurt is the quickest way to get him angry. He hates seeing you hurt. In any way.
“The last storm must’ve changed the stream or something. We hit a sand bank. We haven’t been out here since then,” John B explains. “Let’s get back to the Chateau, we have to get y/n to the hospital.
JJ grabs your face in his hands and wipes away the water there. “Are you hurt anywhere else?”
“No, I don’t think so,” you breathe out. It comes out in a harsh breath, like you’re in too much pain and it sends a wave of panic through JJ. You’re never one to show that you were in pain unless it was an unbearable amount.
“Are you sure?”
He watches as you clench your eyes shut, trying to regulate your breathing. You just nod your head, not opening your eyes again. JJ places a kiss to your cheek and moves down in a line until he meets your lips. He lets out a breath when you kiss him back. Anything to keep you distracted. He pulls back and looks around to everyone else, not knowing what else he can do. Kie has a hand gripped tight in hers, Sarah is running her fingers through your hair, and Pope is holding your leg steady from the bouncing of the boat. JJ feels absolutely useless.
And it’s like you can sense his distress because you grab onto one of his hands and squeeze tight. “JJ stop overthinking. Tell me something. Tell me a story.”
So he quickly jumps into recounting one of your many dates. Asking if you remember it. Telling you how you looked in your outfit, how you made him feel. How much he loves going on dates with you. How he likes that you like to go surfing with him, hiking, biking, anything that requires physical activity. You giggle and laugh at parts that are funny, at how he nearly puked before picking you up to go on your first official date. Everyone else joined in on the laughs too. Soaking up the information they’re receiving.
It helps because you stop crying and wincing at every little movement and it helps calm JJ down as well. He picks you up into his arms when the boat docks and everyone rushes to gather the necessities and get you to the van. JJ lays you down and rests your head in his lap as he continues to tell you about how much he just loves doing simple things with you. Grocery shopping. Clothes shopping, the dishes. Eating food. Anything he can think of, he tells you. He just wants you to know how much he loves you. It’s the only thing he can think of doing. He doesn’t know why but it’s the only thing rattling around in his brain.
How much he loves you.
When the van pulls up to the hospital, everyone is still in a mad panic. It startles the nurses and those in the emergency room when 6 teenagers come bursting into the waiting room, in near hysterics. They don’t really handle each other being in pain well.
The nurse forces him to stay in the waiting room, putting a hand to his chest when he tries to follow you back more than once. You look at him and tell him it’s okay, that you’ll be okay, and as soon as it’s fine he can come back. It does nothing to settle him and he just paces back and forth in front of the 4 other Pogues.
“JJ, sit down. She’s going to be fine.”
“I know,” he sighs, stopping. “She just scared the shit out of me. If she had hit her head instead of her ankle on the side of the boat, she could’ve drowned.”
John B stands to bring him into a hug, “But she didn’t. She’s okay and you’ll see her in a bit.”
And he was right. The doctor came out about twenty minutes later and let JJ go back since your parents weren’t there yet. The rest of the Pogues decided to wait in the waiting room no matter what, saying that they would like to see you too but for obvious reasons to let JJ go first. He’s thankful for that because he feels like he’s about to vibrate right out of his skin.
“Hey, tough stuff,” he jokes as he walks into your room. Your eyes open and you smile at him lazily.
“Hi, baby,” you murmur, reaching a hand out for him. You make grabby hands at him until he’s in reach and it makes him laugh.
He grabs onto your hand and leans down to place a kiss to your lips. You’re still in your bikini but it looks like the sting on your stomach has been taken care of and the lower half of your leg is in a black cast. “Hi, baby,” he whispers back once he meets your eyes again. “How’re you feeling?”
“Well now,” you let out a giggle, “I’m feeling absolutely great. The pain medicine they have me on is wonderful.”
JJ lets out a laugh and caresses your cheek, “You’re higher than a kite, my love.”
You let out a laugh, “Damn straight. You should be so jealous.”
“Oh,” JJ nods, “I am. Don’t you worry about that.”
You let out a content hum, nestling into his hand a bit. Closing your eyes, you rest back into your pillow. “I broke my ankle. And the jellyfish sting isn’t as bad as it looks.”
He runs a hand through your matted hair, “You scared the shit out of me.”
“I’m fine, baby,” you mumble, giving him the smile that melts his entire being. And when you open up your eyes he can see that you really mean it. “Did you really think our dates were that good?”
“Everything we do is that amazing,” JJ points out.
Pulling on his hand, you murmur, “Come take a nap with me. Please. I would like to be close to you. Help me relax.”
JJ doesn’t hesitate to slip into the bed next to you, the vibration of his skin is still there and he knows that it won’t go away until he’s close to you. You turn your back to him and he settles in behind you, curving his body around yours. His arm wraps around your middle and his hand comes to rest on your chest, your steading heartbeat calming down the vibration of his body. You melt down against him and he just holds you to him even tighter.
“I would appreciate it if you stopped getting hurt,” he murmurs, moving your hair out of the way to kiss at the back of your shoulder.
“Yeah, so would I.”
“How about we both stop getting hurt,” JJ suggests, his kisses moving up to the side of your neck. His heart rate has calmed down significantly in just the few seconds of laying here.
“I can do that,” you hum, resting further into his front. “You don’t have to promise it, but just know I’ll always be there to help you when you do get hurt.”
JJ feels a lump form in his throat at your words. He knows what you mean, it’s not something you have to explain to him. You turn your head to look at him up and over your shoulder, a smile gracing your face. JJ nearly cries at the sight, the beautiful sight that it is leaves him breathless. When you pucker your lips, JJ obliges, swooping down in no time and pressing a firm kiss to your lips. His skin tingles at the feeling and he wishes you were anywhere else than in a damn hospital.
“I love you, you know.” You smile at him, kissing at his lips once again.
“I know.” he says against your lips.
If there’s one thing he knows. He knows that you love him. That you’ve given him love every day since the day you met. The only person to give him continuous love, love that he needs. And he knows that you know how much he loves you. How much he will always love you.
So, when you finally fall asleep, nestled in his arms, he sleeps. He sleeps comfortably. The only way he can, when you’re with him
please feed my narcissism 
my masterlist is in my bio
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malfoyfarms · a year ago
Sleepy Girl
Pairing: JJ Maybank x Reader
Word Count: 710
T/W: none
A/N: Idk where this came from, but I feel like everyone needs this time of JJ in their lives rn... also the jeep mentioned is not a new one, I meant an old one, like Stile’s jeep. Or older. do we want jj smut next ?
Of course long days on the water tired everyone out, but something about today completely took the life out of you. You were currently out cold on the deck of the HMS Pogue, covered up with a towel to keep the night breeze from chilling you too much. The rest of your friends sat around you quietly talking, enjoying the ride back to the dock. 
Once the boat had docked, you could feel one of your friends nudging you awake. In a sleepy daze you managed to pick yourself up off the deck, and climb out of the boat. 
“Woah there girly,” John B said as you nearly took a dive off the dock. JJ guided you down the dock, stopping when you grabbed his hand. 
“Up,” you mumbled and climbed onto his back for a piggy ride. He adjusted you and himself, making it easier on his body to carry you to the car. 
A lazy wave goodbye was sent toward the pack of people you left behind. They all stood in watch as they witnessed a different side of their usually tough and high strung friend. He dug through your backpack to find the keys to the old Jeep. Once he found them, he chucked the bag into the back seat, and opened the door to the front. JJ slid you around to his front side, not managing to wake you up. 
“You wanna get ‘n the passenger side or stay in my lap while we drive home?” He asked you. The grip behind his neck tightened, giving him the answer to his question. “Babe, I’m gonna need you to stand for two seconds.” 
You stood still, rubbing your eyes while he pushed the seat back a tad, and spread his legs apart. After he finished getting situated, you climbed into his lap, nuzzling the side of your head into his neck. He buckled you both in and started the car. Before pulling away, he picked up the scrunchie off the PRNDL, and pulled your hair into a low bun. 
“He is so in love with that girl,” Sarah said, admiring all that JJ had done just to accommodate your sleepy wishes. 
“If they don’t get married, love isn't real,” Pope replied.
During the drive home you had woken up a bit more due to the wind blowing around you. Being quite confused at first, you jumped, causing JJ to acknowledge you. He talked to you quietly, letting you know how close you were to home. There was nothing that made JJ feel more proud than the action of you burrowing your face into his neck. He appreciated the intimacy and vulnerability of the action. At the red light, he looked down and could see the outline of your hazy figure against his own. Your fingers traced his left hand which sat on your thigh. A quiet giggle escaped your lips when he shivered at your touch. JJ placed a kiss on the top of your head and turned up the stereo.
You were completely awake by the time the Jeep came to a halt. Grabbing your backpack out of the back seat, and your boy by the hand, you made your way around the house to the back door. 
“Shower and movie?” You asked, and he nodded. This was a typical night for you and JJ. 
He went into the bathroom to start the water, while you sat on your bedroom floor flipping through the stack of old dvds you had collected. 
The two of you shared a shower, saving water and time, and helping each other unwind from the day. You both clambered out ready to crawl into bed. Pajamas were optional, sometimes you both just needed to feel the other skin to skin.
JJ staying at your house had become a natural thing. Your parents never seemed to question it, but at the same time neither did the two of you. He had always been there, and now he never left. But hey, you were certainly not complaining.
With Million Dollar Baby playing in the background, you both slipped under the covers of the bed. There was nothing the two of you would rather be doing, sleeping besides the person you loved was just enough.
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rudethstyles · a year ago
Summary: You and JJ had been dating for a little over a month and have unintentionally made it your thing to kiss whenever your friends weren’t paying attention.
Warnings: swearing, drug use, sexual innuendos
A/N: It’s been some time since I wrote something like this so I’m sorry for any mistakes! I’d love to make more, though, so feel free to send in requests!
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[not my gif]
It all started with a quick kiss late one night. You don’t know what came over you, but as soon as Pope turned his back to you and JJ, you were leaning over and planting a sweet kiss on JJ’s cheek. He was caught off guard by it as you’d both agreed you didn’t want your friends to know just yet, but he’d just smiled and returned the affection — seconds before Pope turned back around and continued to explain why he wanted to be a coroner. From that moment, you and JJ would steal kisses whenever you could when you were around your friends. When it was just you two, there were plenty of kisses, but doing it around your friends — it made it more exciting with the thought of being caught.
At the moment, you and JJ were impatiently waiting in John B.’s Volkswagen with Pope and Kiara while John B. was searching all through his home for his favorite surfboard. You and the Pogues were planning on going to the beach to catch some waves before the storm rolled in, but John B. was having trouble finding his own board. Pope was sat up front and reading a book you’d forgotten the name of already, Kiara leaning against the side of the van, leaving only you and JJ in the back. “Is he sure it isn’t already—”
“Do any of us look like John B. to you?” You teased Pope, cocking a brow towards the boy when he glanced over his shoulder to look in your direction.
“I’m just saying!” Pope defended meekly, shaking his head as he face forward. “It wouldn’t be the first time he forgot it was already on the roof.”
Kiara let out an annoyed sigh, rolling her eyes. It shouldn’t be taking him this long. “I’m gonna go help him look,” she stated, pausing to look inside the van towards you.
You raised your brows expectantly, unsure of what she was wanting. “Okay?”
“Are you sure you wanna be left alone with dumb and dumber?” Kiara asked, unsure as to why you were willingly remaining in the back with JJ as he was expertly rolling a joint you would/wouldn’t be taking hits of later.
You snickered, your smile widening by the offended expressions on Pope and JJ’s face. You nodded, ignoring the sharp glare you were receiving from your boyfriend when you didn’t defend him. “I think I can handle them,” you replied reassuringly. “Besides, this one needs two people watching him at all times to make sure he doesn’t do anything too stupid,” you said, nudging your head in JJ’s direction.
Kiara chuckled, backing towards the Chateau. “Suit yourself, Y/N.”
With that, Kiara jogged off towards the house so they could hopefully leave sooner rather than later. You let out a content sigh once she was out of sight and pulled out your phone to check your notifications. You were going to reply to a text, but you froze when you felt JJ’s breath fan against your exposed neck. You didn’t dare move, afraid it’d capture Pope’s attention.
Your eyes darted aside, but all you saw was a smug smirk on JJ’s face the closer he got closer to you. “Better be still,” he whispered, softly pressing his lips to your skin. Your eyes instinctively fluttered closed, tilting your head to give him more access — it only made his dimpled smirk widen proudly. “Don’t wanna get caught, do you?”
He pressed a gentle kiss to your neck, and you hated how he was affecting you so much with only the little pecks. He was such a tease, and though you enjoyed it at times, so were you. He hated it when you teased him, though. But after all, this was a game for the both of you, and you weren’t going to let him be the only one daring to do something with Pope so close to you two and within eyesight.
You suddenly moved so you and JJ were side by side, your hand going to hold the back of his neck. His eyes widened in excitement, your lips pressing to his lips before he had time to think. He kissed you back hungrily, one of his hands going to your lower back. You playfully bit his lip and he let out a huff, wanting more. However, you pulled away just as quickly and glanced down to your phone as if nothing had just happened.
Pope turned to face you two, noting JJ’s flushed appearance after he heard an odd sound come from the blond. “Dude, are you okay?”
JJ scoffed, clenching his jaw. He didn’t dare look at you, but you knew you’d succeeded. “Yeah, just peachy.”
You smirked to yourself and went back to scrolling through your phone. JJ finished rolling his joint with his heart still thumping loudly in his chest with an ache for more. He carefully placed it to his lips and went to light it, but it was swiftly snatched away by Pope. You winced, knowing JJ didn’t like it when someone did that — especially when he was wanting it to relax him after you’d started something you weren’t going to be finishing anytime soon.
“Bro!” JJ gaped, attempting to take it back.
Pope shook his head and held it further away from his friend, glaring. “Not in the van, bro!”
“I just want a lil taste! It’ll be so quick you won’t even smell it!” JJ defended, trying to grab it again. Pope slid out of the passenger side, daring JJ to make a move.
“Didn’t you already get a taste?” John B. replied instead, cradling his surfboard under his arm with Kiara walking beside him, something unfamiliar on her stunning features. Pope frowned while you and JJ had confused expressions etched on your faces. Surely they didn’t know. John B. rolled his eyes and pointedly glanced between you and JJ, causing your heart to sink. “Are you serious right now? You two aren’t very sneaky.”
Your face paled in realization, lips parting. They knew?
JJ remained calm, feigning further confusion. “What the hell are you talking about, man?”
Kiara moved closer to the van, her arms folded over her chest and head titled. “Cut the bullshit, JJ,” she said, faintly smiling. Then her eyes flickered go you. “Really, Y/N? JJ of all people?”
Your cheeks turned pink, a groan leaving your lips as you pushed your face into your hands. JJ grunted and threw his hands up in the air, eyes pinned to you. “We could’ve fooled them if you’d just tried a little harder, baby!”
“No, you couldn’t have,” Pope retorted, climbing back inside with JJ’s joint hidden in place the surfer boy would never find it; for now. You moved to sit closer to JJ, giving Kiara more room to enter the back of the van while John B. made his way to the drivers side so you all could get going. “I saw you guys at the movies.”
“Movies?” Kiara repeated, face scrunched together. “I saw them at the beach the week before.”
You and JJ briefly glanced to each other, slightly amused. You hadn’t intended for your friends to find out yet, or this way at least, but you were glad they didn’t seem to mind it; you hated the no pogue on pogue macking rule and feared that your friends wouldn’t approve of you and JJ. Thankfully, they felt otherwise. “Wait, how long has this been going on?” Pope wondered, eyes burning into you and JJ for answers.
You pursed your lips in thought, glancing down to your wrist that did not have a watch wrapped around it. “Five weeks, two days, and 16 minutes.”
JJ laughed under his breath, not having any problems with wrapping his arm around your shoulders and pulling you into his side to let everyone know you were in fact his. John B. faintly smiled, but it was suddenly replaced by a frown as he faced the crew. “Hang on,” he said, blinking in surprise, but his eyes were on Pope and Kiara. “You two already knew about this?”
Pope and Kiara nodded in unison. “Well duh. Didn’t you?” Kiara laughed.
“They’re weren’t very discreet,” Pope said, momentarily pausing. “No offense.”
“None taken,” you replied with a nonchalant shrug.
John B. scoffed, his brows knitted together. “I only found out today!”
You giggled, reaching forward to give him a comforting pat on the shoulder. “It’s okay, John B.,” you said kindly. “Despite what Pope and Kie say, we were pretty good at hiding it for a while.”
“Sure, Y/N,” Kie teased.
You gave her a playful shove, making her let out a loittke augh. Your body curled further into JJ’s side once John B. started up the Volkswagen and began heading towards the awaiting beach. You let out a content sigh as you relaxed in your boyfriends safe arms, smiling to yourself when he pressed a soft kiss to the top of your head.
“Hey, just because we know now doesn’t mean you can be all lovey-dovey whenever you want,” Pope playfully scolded when he saw the kiss.
John B. chuckled, stealing a look in the rear view mirror. “Save it for the bedroom.”
“Oh, we will,” JJ smugly said, grinning from ear to ear. You whacked his arm in disgust and Kie grimaced, facing the window. JJ only chuckled and tightened his grip on you, making you feel at ease with the world.
Though your friends now knew about you and JJ, you had a feeling that you and JJ would happily continue to try and get as many kisses in without your friends noticing the exchanges, and you didn’t mind one bit.
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maybanksbaby · a year ago
Straight Simpin - JJ Maybank
JJ thinks he’s all big and bad, saying he would never ever be caught simping over a girl. That is until John B and Pope catch him doing exactly that with you.
Requested by @danicarosaline 💙
Warnings: some curse words
Word Count: 1.4k+
"Every time she's around, your eyes are glued on her, dude," JJ teased his curly-headed best friend who sat across the table from him.
"I gotta say you have it bad for Sarah Cameron," Pope adds on as he munches on a french fry. John B shoots him a glare before coming back at him.
"I have it bad?" He questions as he gestures towards the girl with long brown curly hair who is helping her father behind the counter. "Have you seen the way you are with Kie? You are one hundred percent a simp for the girl." A small smile spreads upon the dark-skinned boy's face as he tugs his hat down a little lower to hide his blushing cheeks.
"What? I like her, man. Nothing wrong with that," Pope tells him as JJ lets out a chuckle.
"I'll tell you two suckers one thing. You will never catch me all mushy and gushy over a girl like y'all are. That shit's lame." The two boys collectively roll their eyes at JJ knowing as soon as you showed up, his tough guy act would fall to the floor in an instant and he would be all over you.
"Okay, whatever," John B scoffed before taking a sip of his water.
"Sorry guys! I didn't mean to come so late. They had me held up at work later than expected," you rush the words out as you plop down in the seat between JJ and Pope and set your bag down next to you on the floor.
"About damn time. I was beginning to think you forgot about us," John B spoke from across the table.
"How could I forget about you guys?" You giggle as you ruffle your fingers through JJ's hair. He sends a sweet smile your way before pulling your hand out of his golden locks and placing it down on your thigh.
"Have you eaten today?" He questions as he fixes the blond strands you just threw all over the place.
"Not since like ten this morning. I'm fucking starving," you say as you place a hand on your growling stomach. JJ pushes his plate of fries towards you before turning around to the counter at The Wreck.
"Kie, we need some food in here! Y/n hasn't eaten since this morning! Here, eat my fries until she brings you something." You do as asked of you and giggle at the boy beside you. You notice small snickers coming from John B and Pope but think nothing of it. In what feels like no time at all, Kie comes out with some food for you and takes a seat at the table as well.
"So how was work today, y/n?" She inquired but by the rolling of your eyes, she could tell it was not a good day.
"It was literally the fucking worst. When I got there, the place was so busy with almost no one working so I had to deal with all that. Then, a group of stuck up kooks came in and would pick clothes up but then throw them back down all messed up, so I'd have to go behind them and refold everything. And then, oh my God, the worst part was this guy who came in the store and at first, I was like he's kinda cute but then he kept trying to talk to me and hitting on me in a gross way and I was clearly uninterested. Then I go to the back of the store to get something and he follows me, grabs my ass, and says 'The only thing in this store that I want is you'. I literally wanted to vomit."
"Ew," Kie comments and you nod your head in agreement.
"Yeah, I know."
"Do you know who he is? Or his name?" JJ asks from beside you, but you shake your head at him. 
"I think I've seen him hang out with Kelce before but that's it," you inform him before turning your attention back to the food sitting in front of you.
"Was it that Justin guy?" He further presses on the issue that you could care less about.
"Maybe? I don't know. I don't know a Justin. Why's it such a big deal?"
"Because he touched you and was being a perv and I won't hesitate to cave his face in." You could see him getting riled up, so you placed your hand on top of his balled-up fist, feeling it loosen under your touch.
"Easy there tiger. I am fine. No need to get all worked up or fight someone." His blue eyes soften when they make eye contact with yours and you give his hand a little pat before going back to eating. The crew around you continues to converse as you eat. You can feel JJ looking over at you every once in a while, but you shake it off. Just when you finish your meal, an upbeat song comes on the radio and all you want to do is dance.
“Would you care to dance with me?” You ask the blond who sat to your right. A small grin grew on his face as he nodded his head. You stood up and held a hand out to him, which he gladly took as you eagerly dragged him over to an empty spot near the radio. As the two of you goofily danced and swayed, your group of friends discussed what was happening between you and JJ.
“They are so cute,” Kie gushed from her seat as she watched the two of you sway to the music. She smiled, seeing the biggest grin spread on your face after JJ twirled you around before pulling you back towards him. “They are so fucking adorable. I don’t get why they don’t just date already.”
“I don’t know either, but JJ has it so bad for that girl,” Pope adds. John B nods in agreement before speaking.
“He’s straight simpin, bro.” The two boys laugh at the dancing boy who had said only moments before that he would never be ‘all mushy and gushy over a girl’. John B and Pope continue joking about the lovesick blonde until the song ends and you and JJ come back to the table, giggling.
“Did you two have fun?” John B asked you with a mischievous smile on his face. You rolled your eyes before responding.
“Yeah, I did. Did you, JJ?” You asked, turning towards him. He nodded his head before shooting a warning glare to the Routledge boy. Pope chuckled beside you before changing the subject and carrying on a conversation with Kiara. An hour or so passes and tiredness falls over you as you let out a small yawn.
“I think I’m going to go. I’m exhausted after work today and I have to go back tomorrow,” you announce as you stand from your chair and push it in behind you.
“Want me to walk with you?” JJ asks.
“No, it’s okay. You can stay and hang. Don’t worry about me.”
“You sure?” He questions once more and you nod, another yawn spilling past your lips. You say your goodbyes and leave the restaurant.
“Oh y/n, have you eaten anything today?” John B mocks JJ’s sweet and caring actions from earlier.
“Yeah, and do you want to dance with me?” Pope adds to the torment.
“She asked me to dance,” JJ defended himself.
“But you said yes,” John B counters as JJ sits back and lets him talk, knowing that it would not be long before he would catch him doing the same thing with Sarah Cameron.
“So, you’re saying that if the kook princess waltzed up in here and asked you to dance with her, you would decline?” JJ asked the shaggy-haired boy. John B stayed quiet, knowing full and well that he would dance with Sarah if given the chance.
“That’s what I thought,” JJ spoke as Pope giggled loudly at John B’s embarrassment. “Oh, zip it, you know you’d do the same if the girl of your dreams asked you too.” Kie laughed at JJ’s effectiveness to shut the other boys down, but she was completely oblivious of the fact that she was the girl of Pope’s dreams.
“Okay boys, help me clean up around here, and then let’s go, alright?” Kie asked and the three nodded as they began to pick up their plates and continue picking on each other about their love lives.
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anakin-skywalker · a year ago
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This is my family. I found it, all on my own. — LILO & STITCH (INSP)
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loveylangdon · a year ago
If You Don’t I Will
Word count: 3.3k
JJ Maybank x Reader : showing jj subtle ways of how you care for him and John B is tired of him not seeing it
A/N: I wrote another JJ thing bc im a simp and I love him and this was also another idea thats been floating around. Fluff is you squint but you dont need to squint hard, next will def be angst bc I live for it Xx
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*not my gif full credit to owner*
“Hey” you let out as you carry 2 bags of groceries into the cheateu seeing the boys lounging on the couch gathered around John B’s phone you hear a chorus of “hey’s” as you move towards the kitchen. John B looks up and hands his phone to JJ making his way out the front door sending you a wink. Rolling your eyes you follow John B outside to your car. 
“You didn’t have to,” John B says smiling at you grabbing a grocery bag from your trunk shooting you a look 
“I have no idea what you’re talking about” you smile innocently to him and make your way over to grab the last grocery bag. You reach past John B until you feel his arm wrap over your shoulder, putting his grocery bag down he wraps his other arm around your shoulder engulfing you in a full hug laying his cheek at the top of your head. You wrap your arms around his torso and give him a squeeze 
“Thank you really” he lets out into your hair. You just give him a hug, you haven’t known them for long but John B automatically became like your brother and JJ was definitely your confidant. When you heard about Big John and Uncle T leaving John B by himself, your heart broke. John B had to support himself and apparently JJ was a constant resident in the chateau and it got harder to support themselves even if they both pitched in. When you found out always being smart with your money you set some aside to help supply the chateau so the boys wouldn’t starve.
JJ broke down one night during a late night smoke sesh you two had to get away from everything. He ended up telling you about his dad and mom in its entirety. After that you guys were kind of inseparable.You told him about why you had to move to OBX and he told you where his bruises and split knuckles came from. You never would’ve guessed one of the most caring people you knew would have to go through that. After that you subtly did more little things that hopefully made it easier on him. 
When you joined the Pogues you fell for his blue eyes and wild personality instantly his careless but protective nature made you fall hard but there was the rule. No Pogue on Pogue macking. Still fairly new to obx barely being here for a year you didn’t know how real the rule was. Being extra nice to JJ consisted of bringing extra of his favorite beer or asking him to buy you joints even though you didn’t smoke often, you would let him keep them, noticing his favorite snacks and bringing them on boat trips. Kie gladly gave up the title of caretaker and let you take over the snacks and picnics for day trips. After JJ told you his secret he made it clear that he didn’t take pity or handouts, you didn’t pity JJ you loved him and just wanted to make sure he knew it. 
So you helped JJ whenever you could making it seem like you were doing it by pure coincidence, knowing that he lived with John B you helped out the house, in general, to make it less obvious. Claiming you all spent so much time there any way it wasn’t fair to not help stock the necessities. 
Breaking away from your thoughts “I’m here for you guys always” you squeeze John B once more after you feel him loosening his grip “Let’s go I got ice cream” as John B fist bumps you snort “Oh I also got a better first aid kit” handing John B the second bag you move to the passenger side of the car. Hearing John B go back into the house you grab the first aid kit and hear footsteps as you open the back seat door to grab blankets. 
“What are the blankets for,” JJ asks questionably moving over to you to help grab some and you see him eye the first aid kit before you tuck it into a blanket
“For movie night. You can’t have a horror movie night without tons of blankets JJ it’s like against the rules” You quickly come up with the excuse. In all honesty it was starting to get colder and knowing the Chateau has minimal heating capacity you were going to accidentally leave them in the house and let the boys use them. The last time you were here late you asked JJ to borrow a sweater or a blanket and he gave you the one he was wearing and soon realized it was probably the only one you’ve seen him wear ever. Noticing Kie always brought her own blanket you assumed they were more supplied for the warmer days. John B was a big boy he would ask for help when he needed it JJ, on the other hand, was stubborn as hell and would rather freeze then ask for anything to help. 
“Okay” JJ says questionably not believing you entirely but not questioning it further “Are you staying tonight?” He asks you can see a glimmer of hope in his ocean eyes as he leans against the car door
“Yeah I think so” you smile and nod at him closing the car up “Are you?”
“No I’m just asking you so you can share my bed with Kie” he deadpans and your cheeks flush 
“Sorry” you squint up at him and you see him smile his “sharky smile” “Are Pope and Kie staying too?” 
“I think so” he nods at you biting his lip and you know he wants to add something but doesn’t
“Can I share a bed with you?” You ask assuming that’s what he wanted to ask “if I have to share a room with both Pope and Kie I might jump off the end of the dock, plus I got those joints still and extra snacks” you chuckle out trying to bribe him like you even have to. You see relief and a cute smile grace his features and you know that’s what he was trying to ask without even asking 
“Yeah you can crash with me, I like you the most anyways” he winks at you and nods towards the house “Have you eaten yet?” He asks you softly as you walk up the driveway “Pope and John B went to help Heyward earlier while I went to work and apparently they ate already” JJ trails off and you frown knowing there hasn’t been food at the chateau in a couple of days and John B has been incognito
“I can make us food,” you say and he perks up “I haven’t eaten yet” you continue which is a lie but he doesn’t need to know that “I bought stuff to make that shrimp thing you were talking about the other day” and you see his face light up as you walk into the house you smile at him and you can see pink dust his cheeks at the fact you remembered that small detail. He puts the blankets down taking the ones in your hands as well and wraps you in a hug carrying you to the kitchen leaving you in a fit of laughter. You see Pope peek his head out over the freezer with raised eyebrows 
“What are you doing,” he asks confused as to why you’re wrapped in JJs arms 
“Get out Pope y/n is making our food” he throws a look at Pope as he sets you down making Pope return a hurt one 
“You guys suck” he huffs out going back into the living room 
JJ sits on the counter as you start to pull out ingredients to make his food, John B put the groceries away thankfully and you hum to a random tune 
“Thank you” JJ lets out in almost a whisper and you look up at him and see he’s playing with the rings on his fingers a nervous habit he has while looking at his lap not making eye contact 
“For what” you feign innocence even though his small thank you made your heart flutter knowing your efforts and little signs of affection didn’t go unnoticed by the blonde boy. Moving to the stove to heat it up JJ finally looks at you and he shrugs his shoulders softly before twiddling his thumbs in his lap
“For taking the time to care about me” he shrugs again like he’s not worth the effort, you go to say something and he cuts you off looking at you with his ocean eyes making you forget how to breathe for a second, sincerity is swimming through them and you can’t help the butterflies in your stomach “I know you had dinner with Kie already. She told me you guys were gonna eat at The Wreck during her break if I wanted to pass by before you went to run errands which I’m assuming was getting food for here” your face flushes at being caught lying about dinner “I also saw the first aid kit you bought, and Its a nice one. I almost stole one just like it from the pharmacy a while back and I know John B doesn’t need one that good” he goes back to looking at his thumbs “And I know the blankets aren’t just for the movie night” He shoots you a knowing look causing you to blush and smile at him, taking a moment in the comforting silence you assume the boys are outside messing around 
Humming you smile giddily not confirming or denying “Okay I’m gonna make you food now go away” you joke shooing him out of the kitchen 
He gasps in shock “You wound me” he clutches his chest with both his hands and falls back against the cabinets “Treating me how I treat Pope now that’s cold” He gets off of the counter still clutching his chest moving closer towards you 
“Leave” you squeal at him as he traps you in between his arms and the sink, he leans in and you think he’s going to finally kiss you, heart beating so fast you think he could hear it if he got any closer. His eyes flicker to your lips and back to your eyes as he licks his lips your breath hitches in your throat, he leans down to place a kiss on your cheek leaving the kitchen and going outside. Watching him retreat you finally let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding in. “Jesus Christ” you huff and go back to making his food with a big smile on your face 
“Holy shit” JJ practically moans at the smell coming in from the kitchen “I can’t even think of the last home cooked meal I’ve had what about you John B” You hear JJ ask as him as they walk back into the Chateau,
“Uh I think-” John B starts but is cut off by JJ 
“That was rhetorical bro shut up” you hear them walk into the living room and see them come into the kitchen “we know you have a secret kook family chill” JJ lets out referring to the fact that John B disappears some nights and during the day and no one knows why. Causing a laugh to come from you and a scoff from John B
“That smells delicious y/n” John B lets out which earns a mean look from JJ 
“You can’t have any” JJ says defensively “she made it for me and her you guys are all traitors eating without us” JJ winks at you “what happened to Pogues together for life” JJ adds pointing a finger at John B as you try to stifle a laugh grabbing plates 
John B looks at JJ with the most unamused look you’ve ever seen which causes a burst of laughter from you. Catching John B’s attention he gives you a look as if asking if JJ is serious, you shrug your shoulders as John B scoffs “I welcome you into my home JJ and this is how you repay me” He tsks opening a beer for you and placing it on the counter by your plates, he gives you a side hug and places a kiss on your forehead before retreating outside to help Pope and Kie with a projector she found in her garage. As he walks through the living room you hear “Eat your food dumbass, and if you don’t marry her I will” John B shouts out and you immediately turn to look at John B who has his beer raised in the air “Salud” and he walks out of the Cheateu. 
Turning to JJ his face is beat red and you let out a small laugh as JJ groans mumbling something about murdering John B “Here eat tough guy I’m gonna grab blankets for outside” you say as you place a plate in front of JJ. You’re about to walk into John B’s room when you feel JJ grab your hand 
“Stay please” he lets out a smile while tugging on your wrist gently patting the spot next to him, you can tell he wants to say something again but you can’t tell what its gonna be because he’s looking down at his plate of food. Your foot starts tapping the floor a nervous tick you have when you can’t tell how something is gonna play out. His head snaps to your knee placing his hand there gently to stop it and he looks up at you “Don’t do that, not around me” he lets out looking at you 
“You do that when your nervous or unsure of a situation” he squeezes your knee in a comforting motion giving you a small smile at your confused expression, “You think you’re the only one who notices things around here” he shoots you a look and his eyes go wide trying to cover up his confession with a chuckle 
“Do you JJ Maybank have feelings for little old me” you shoot him an amused look with a gasp. He opens his mouth to say something but nothing comes out and he looks at you sheepishly rubbing the back of his neck while pink tints his cheeks 
“Hey, Lovebirds we got the movie set up come on” you hear John B yell from outside. You move to get up and JJ stops you looking up at you with a look of concentration before he exhales
“I like you y/n a lot actually and it’s scaring me. I’m not gonna lie to you. I’m not used to this or feeling wanted, hell even wanting to be around one person constantly is new for me. You are this incredible person who came out of fucking nowhere and the first thing you did was make sure everyone is taken care of. I didn’t even notice what you would do for me at first because I was so angry at everything. John B pointed it out to me when we found more of my favorite snacks in the cupboard than his” he let out a chuckle and you did too “He told me to stop being stupid and I realized then all the small things you would do for me like when I wouldn’t eat with you guys you brought food, or extra snacks on boat trips when you knew I was going home after, you and Kie would go shopping and you literally got me a hoodie because you told me it reminded you of me. No one has cared about me in the way you have and I’m so sorry for not realizing it sooner” you squeeze his hand gently reassuring him noticing his voice waiver “you’re so strong and stubborn but god if it didn’t make me fall for you harder, and I wasn’t gonna say anything because there is no way in hell that I’m good enough for you, I mean seriously I don’t know what you see-” cutting him off you place a kiss to his lips to shut him up, he places his hand on the side of your neck holding your jaw melting into the kiss. This is what heaven feels like you think. This blonde haired blue eyed prince. JJ breaks apart and rests his forehead against yours smiling like an idiot 
“I like you a lot actually too, if you couldn’t tell” you whisper out causing him to let out a laugh placing a chaste kiss to your lips, pulling you into his lap, your back to his chest as he nuzzles into the crook of your neck before you move to face him “Oh” you let out and he looks confused, you shoot him a look and he smirks. Hitting his chest playfully “get your head out of the gutter” 
“I know exactly where I would like my head to be” he smirks placing a kiss to your pulse. Rolling your eyes at him you start off “If I hear you talk bad about yourself I will fight you Maybank do you hear me” you look at him knowingly and he raised his eyebrows as if telling you to proceed “That is a fight you will lose every time. I can promise you,” you look at him softly “you deserve the world and all the love that comes with it, you care so much about your friends you’re willing to do anything to protect them literally anything” emphasizing the literally he lets out a chuckle “You are so kind, generous always giving even when you don’t have much yourself that’s what I love about you. There is more good than what you define yourself as and if you have doubts I will be more than glad to fight them with you” you let out rubbing your thumb on his cheek which he nuzzles into until he crashes his lips into yours again. 
“I thought you were eating, you haven’t even started are you kidding? YOU GUYS ARE MACKING we’ve been waiting for like 10 minutes” John B lets out from the doorway of the house raising his arms in a what the fuck motion, causing you both to laugh “J I’m proud of you for finally telling her, but Jesus come on guys the foods all cold, we don’t even have snacks because you’re distracting y/n, we’re dying out here” he fake whines 
“Sorry John B” you let out a smile knowing you usually prepare the snacks for movie nights but got distracted
“My girlfriend is not your Slave John B get your own snacks” JJ jokes holding onto you tighter
“Says the guy she made dinner for but hasn’t even touched it yet!” John B says dramatically “honestly the disrespect happening in this house, everything is all out of wack,” John B says going to the fridge and grabbing a case of beer and candy making his way back outside before he turns around heading back to you and JJ “Actually,” he says out loud before taking JJ’s plate with food taking a bite and moaning at the taste John B continues “I’m serious y/n if he doesn’t marry you I will” he gets out with a mouth full of food, moving slightly to avoid JJ arms that are trying to swat him for taking his food. John B walks out of the house leaving you two alone again 
“I’ll get you another plate, grab the blankets?” you ask chuckling as you move to get JJ another plate of food but he stops you. 
Taking his pinky ring off his finger he places it on your fingers trying to find the best fit, finally, it fits on your middle finger, a little loose but not by much, he chuckles “maybe I’ll get you a chain for it” he states chuckling he kisses your knuckles when he’s done “Not an engagement ring but a temporary promise ring until we get you a real one so John B can stop trying to steal you from me.”
“I think its perfect” He smiles bright placing a kiss on your lips and you know that this is exactly where you’re supposed to be
A/N: so I wrote another jj thing bc who is not a whore for jj especially soft jj. Roughly edited but not really, this has been floating in my head for a while so feedback and commentary is again always welcome my inbox is always open I hope you enjoyed this as much as I did Xx 
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bricksatcaleswindow · a year ago
Just You
request: Hey!! id like to request JJ Maybank x reader please💛reader being known as the most innocent and sweetest gal in OBX & secretly dating JJ but the pogues start to ship her with this dude who radiates the same kind of charisma to her and JJ gets all jealous and angry especially when that dude starts to show interest to her but reader just finds it so cute that JJ is jealous and the pogues are starting to get sus about their relationship!! 🥰❤️
@danicarosaline​ thank you for the request and being so patient!! i hope you like it babes 💛
gif credit to @jjmaybnk
pairings: jj x reader
word count: 2.3k
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You have a reputation.
If you asked anyone on the island who the sweetest person was, they’d say you. They didn’t have to know you personally to come to that conclusion. You had made a name for yourself in the Outer Banks by just being kind. You were the first person to offer help and the last person to say no. There was an air of innocence to you, one that had others drawn to you.
You didn’t really mean to fall for JJ, it just sort of happened.
He was the polar opposite of you. He was quick to tell someone to fuck off, didn’t really care about anyone but his friends, and definitely didn’t believe everyone deserved kindness. But when it came to you, he had a ridiculously huge soft spot. You had him wrapped around your finger. He would do anything if you asked him to, his reputation be damned.
It happened over night. You had been sitting beside JJ, half-awake as he smoked a blunt with Kie. She had gotten up at some point to help John B. and Pope in the kitchen. She had mumbled something about boys being helpless, which had made you laugh.
JJ had turned to you and said, “Hey, we’re not all useless, you know. I happen to be a very good pillow.”
You had laughed at that too, sitting up and sending him a smile. You were sleepy, a bit delirious from spending all day in the sun. And JJ had looked at you like you were the only person on earth. He leaned in and kissed you then. It was a soft, mind blowing kiss that changed the dynamic between you two forever.
And it became your little secret.
It’s not that you didn’t want your friends to know. In fact, it took three hours for JJ to convince you to not tell them yet. He wanted you to himself, wanted to explore your relationship more before revealing that you two were breaking the no macking rule.
It was an easy secret to keep. The pogues had a weird fascination with finding someone who fit your personality, always missing the touches and longing looks you shared with JJ. They were clueless – or, so you thought.
You lean back into your seat at the Wreck, smiling as Kie whips John B. with a towel. “Touch the fries before they’re ready and I’ll end you, Routledge,” she warns, fixing him with a glare.
“Jeez, I’m hungry, Kie, not trying to steal your fortune,” he jokes, holding his hands up.
“Idiots,” Pope comments, sending the two of them a grin.
Kie goes to reply but the bell at the door ringing cuts her off. A smile lights up her face brightly. She nearly barrels into the bar in front of you, her eyebrows raised. “Guess who just walked in?”
You furrow your eyebrows at her, exchanging a confused look with JJ. “Uh, your dad? The Pope? Jesus himself?” you guess.
Kie rolls her eyes. “y/n, sometimes I think you spend too much time with JJ. It’s Shawn. You know, from the youth club you joined?” she waggles her eyebrows at you suggestively, looking to Pope and John B. for back up.
Pope perks up, his eyes brightening like he just remembered what Kie was getting at. “Oh, yeah. y/n, we think he has a thing for you. He’s literally just like you. Why don’t you try to get with him?”
JJ tenses up beside you, his head turning to look at Shawn. “Just like her?” he asks, voice low.
You had met Shawn three weeks ago at a youth club your mom signed you up for. Kie had felt bad for you and joined too, accompanying you to the first meeting. There, you had met Shawn. He was a nice guy, pretty cute too. If you hadn’t fallen for JJ, you probably would’ve considered dating him. But it wasn’t like that, and you had made it clear to Kie.
Or, so you thought.
“Hey, Shawn!” Kie calls, effectively cutting off whatever you were about to say. She moves to the end of the counter by JJ, who’s giving you a sour look.
You send him an apologetic smile, your eyes drifting from him to Shawn, who’s now leaning beside him. “Hey, Kie! Hey, y/n!” he says brightly, sending you a warm smile. “I figured I’d find you guys here.”
“You were looking for us?” you ask curiously, your head tipping to the side. JJ sends you a look, one that asks you what the flying fuck you’re doing. You squeeze his arm reassuringly, your eyes begging him to keep it cool for now.
Neither of you notice Kie watching you.
“Yeah, actually,” Shawn says, looking over at you. “We’re having a bonfire party tonight. I figured I’d invite you two-” He pauses, his eyes skimming over the boys. “and your friends, of course. The more the merrier!”
“That sounds dope,” John B. says, nodding. “Need us to bring anything?”
“We’ll have beer and food. If you want something specific you can, but we’ve got you covered, dude.” Shawn’s good mood rubs off the rest of the pogues, all of them smiling and nodding – except JJ. He looks annoyed, his eyes focused on his hands.
“We’ll be there,” Kie says warmly. She looks over at you, a smile widening on her features by the minute. You try to smile back, your mind moving a thousand miles a minute. Your hand tightens on JJ’s arm, trying to reassure him.
But all you can think about is how tonight probably won’t go as planned.
JJ stops you a little way back, the rest of the pogues not realizing as they make their way to the party. They’re pushing one another, their laughs ringing in the air loudly as they stumble onto the beach.
“y/n,” he says softly, looking down at you. “I’m sorry about earlier. It just sucks that our friends want you to date someone else.”
You give him a reassuring smile, stroking his cheek gently. “I only want to be with you, okay? Shawn is just a friend. We’ll tell them soon and they’ll drop this.”
JJ leans down and kisses you gently. You lean into him, your insides melting as his hands dance in circles over your skin. You’ll never get over how JJ makes you feel, how his touch has you completely unraveling in seconds.
You pull away slowly, wishing you could spend all night melting into your boyfriend. But you can’t, so, you grab his hand and lead him down to the beach. You find your friends quickly, dropping JJ’s hand in favor of helping Kie pour everyone beers.
Everyone drifts off in their own direction. JJ and John B. move to the beer pong tables. JJ sends you one last longing look, his eyes lingering on yours for a moment too long before John B. drags him off, sending you a confused look in the process. Pope drifts over to some tourons, laughing and telling them a story that would probably scar them. You stick by Kie, leaning into her as she sways to a song playing.
“Hey! You guys made it!”
Shawn is walking over to you, his arms out at his side and a smile on his face. You have to admit that his smile is contagious, because in seconds, you and Kie are grinning back at him.
“We told you we’d be here,” you say, taking a sip of your beer.
“I’m glad! Did you guys want to play flip cup? We have an intense game going and we need more players.” He gestures to a table three down from where JJ and John B. are.
Your eyes find JJ easily, warmth spreading through your veins when you find he’s already looking at you.
“I suck at flip cup,” Kie says suddenly, drawing your attention back to her. “But y/n is amazing at it. Why don’t you go? I was going to jump into some beer pong, anyways.”
You know what Kie is doing and you want to punch her. But instead you send Shawn a weak smile, trying not to notice the way he’s looking at you. Shawn links his arm with yours, gesturing towards the flip cup table. You let him guide you, sending a sharp look over your shoulder at Kie. She simply blows you and kiss and a thumbs up, laughing.
“Alright, y/n, show us what you got!” Shawn calls from the side, giving you a thumbs up as you line up in front of another girl.
You fall into an easy rhythm with Shawn and his friends. Kie wasn’t wrong when she said you were great at flip cup. You would run tables at every party you attended, never once losing to this day.
“Dude, how are you so good at this?” Shawn asks in awe. You make your way towards him, a grin on your face. “Seriously, I’ve never met someone who could kick the ass of the entire lacrosse team.”
You laugh loudly at that, shaking your head at him. “I actually have JJ to thank. We played every night in John B.’s backyard for like, three months last year.”
Shawn laughs, sending you a sweet smile. He guides you towards the keg where your friends have all drifted to. You don’t miss the sharp look JJ sends Shawn. You try to catch his eye, but you can see is mood is souring by the second.
“How was flip cup?” Kie asks, sending Shawn a grin. “Did she kick ass like usual?”
“Hell yeah,” he says, shaking his head. He shoves his hands into his pocket and steps closer to you, his flannel shirt rubbing against your arm. You bite your lip and subtly move closer to JJ. Kie’s eyes slide from you to JJ, a look in her eyes you can’t quite unravel. “She kicked serious ass. I don’t get how one can be so good at that game.”
“y/n is our secret weapon everywhere we go,” John B. says, tipping his cup at you. His eyes move from you to JJ, sliding down to JJ’s fingers that are now playing with the frayed hem of your shorts. You clear your throat, drawing his attention back up to you. His eyes narrow, but he looks away, sipping his beer.
“Shawn, what do you do usually?” JJ asks suddenly, looking over your head at him. “I mean, do you work? Go to school? Life goals?”
“Jeez, JJ, slow down with the grilling, dude,” Pope says, sending him a weird look.
You know exactly what JJ is doing. You suppress the urge to giggle, opting for biting your lip and looking past your friends at the rest of the party. Your boyfriend was ridiculously adorable, and you know damn well you can’t keep your composure if you make eye contact with them.
“It’s all good, man,” Shawn says kindly. “I work for my dad. He’s got a construction company. I have dreams to take over my dad’s company or maybe start my own. I go back to college in the fall. I go to UNC Chapel Hill, so I’m not too far from home.”
“That must be a nice change. Do you ever get snow?” you ask. JJ’s fingers tap against your skin in disapproval, but you just send him a smile.
“Sometimes. North Carolina and snow do not mix. A dusting shuts down the whole state,” he says, laughing a little. “You should visit sometime. I could show you around.”
His words are aimed at you, and you alone. You freeze, moving your eyes over to him. He’s smiling down at you sweetly. He’s been nice to you all night, never once pushing boundaries or saying stupid shit. And for a split second, you feel bad, feel like you should say yes. Your friends are all watching you, all of them wearing different expressions that are somewhat suspicious of your hesitation. You open your mouth, ready to reply.
But JJ beats you to it.
“Yeah, no, my girlfriend will not be visiting you anywhere, anytime. Thanks for the offer though, man,” he says sharply. His arm loops around your waist and he tugs you to him. You stumble into him, placing your hands on his chest to catch yourself.
“I knew it!” Kie cries out, her beer sloshing out of her cup and into the sand at her outburst.
“No fucking way,” Pope says, crossing his arms over his chest and staring at the two of you in confusion.
Shawn excuses himself, laughing a little and smiling over at you. You know there’s no hard feelings there, but you still feel kind of bad. But then JJ’s grip on you is tightening and your attention moves back to him. You melt into his side, resting your head on his chest. “You’re so not subtle, babe,” you say jokingly.
“When did this happen?” John B. asks. “Cause if we’re taking bets, I say two weeks ago.”
“No way, at least a month,” Kie pipes up.
“You guys knew?” Pope cries out.
“Fuck you guys,” JJ says, pushing John B. into Kie. The two of them cackle together, leaning into one another.
You laugh a little, melting into JJ some more. As your friends bicker over how long ago you and JJ got together, you turn and press a soft kiss to his cheek. “I don’t need someone who’s like me. I have you and that’s more than I could ever ask for you,” you murmur.
JJ’s fingers brush over your cheekbones as he looks down at you, his eyes full of love. He doesn’t say anything, doesn’t need to. He leans down and kisses you softly, flipping your friends off when they start shouting at the two of you.
You’d explain yourselves later.
tag list: @notphilosopherstudentblog​, @anonymous0writer​, @simonsbluee​
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