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astarionancuntnin · 16 days

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Undisclosed Desires (Chapter 3 - Ending)

summary: back at your camp, your companions celebrate your findings of the day, concluding this quest. you realize your feelings for the vampire might be more serious than you previously thought, and with the courage the wine gives you, you take a step to do something about it

rating: E

word count: 2.6k

pairing: astarion x you (afab!reader (she/her pronouns used), sorceress tav)

cw: 18+. smut, porn with no plot, denial of feelings gets resolved, porn with feelings, alcohol induced sex, overstimulation, mating press, act 1 astarion might take advantage of tav's vulnerability but we're assuming that he's also already falling for her, possessive sex, creampie, reader admits her feelings, soft ending

a/n: FINAL CHAPTER i never expected to get there when writing the first chapter but i got really invested in the relationship of astarion and how i wrote reader!tav in this one. thanks for all your comments and feedback, and most of all thank you for reading along! <3

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You trick your lovers

That you're wicked and divine

You may be a sinner

But your innocence is mine

With the lack of visibility from within the dungeon, you never realized how much time you had actually spent down there. It’s only once outside that you realize how long it’s been, with the sun currently setting. Once you finally reach your camp, dusk has fallen and you spot the campfire already lit, with some of your companions surrounding it. Shadowheart spots you as you emerge from the forest path with Astarion, visibly tired, and bolts towards you, taking you in a strong embrace.

“Oh, thank the Gods you’re alright,” she pulls back, grabbing you strongly by your arms and stares right into your eyes, her worry turning into annoyance. “Do you know how long we’ve been waiting for you?! We were expecting you to be back hours ago!”

You smile softly, “I’m okay, really, we just… got into a predicament of sorts. Nothing to worry about, I assure you.” Before letting your friend’s mind wander too far, you pull out the artifact from your bag. “But,” you raise your voice to get the attention of the rest of your companions watching from afar, as you hold the artifact high and wave it to them. “We found the missing piece!”

“Fuck yeah, soldier!” Karlach shouts from her bedroll. “We gotta celebrate!”

Everyone else eagerly agrees and in a matter of minutes, you’re all drinking, laughing, shouting, and dancing around the camp. Except Karlach, of course, her leg still healing from that awful trap she walked in, but she is just as joyful as the rest of you and drinks along, laying on her bedroll in the middle of the camp. She wouldn’t allow a mere injury to keep her from enjoying her friends’ company.

As the night settles down and some of your companions head to bed, you’re joined by the cleric, sitting down around the fire.

“So, you and Astarion, huh?”

“Ugh, pleaaaase, it only happened once,” you let your head fall between your hands.

“Really? Because judging by the state you arrived in and the new bite on your neck, I would think that–”

“OKAY fine,” you interrupt her. “...twice.” She gives you a playful look. “But it just, sorta happened you know? I swear I didn’t plan this!”

“Oh, I’m sure you didn’t.” She laughs. “I’m just surprised I guess, I didn’t take him for your type.”

“He’s really not!”

“Sure, whatever helps you sleep at night,” she grins at you.

“I… I don’t even know myself,” your voice softens.

Your vision falls on Astarion who is standing by himself, far from the party, indulging in a bottle of wine by the side of the lake. You keep observing him as Shadowheart continues to talk.

“Don’t you think you deserve to know?” You sigh. “I was sure I hated him. I probably did at some point. He’s so snobby and pretentious and arrogant and– Gods, he’s everything I despise in a person!” “Would it make you feel better if I told you I thought the same thing about you when we first met?”

“Well, first of all, rude,” she laughs before you continue. “Second of all… not really, but it wouldn’t surprise me. That’s how people have always seen me. For years, I lived with the fact that I was unlikeable and unapproachable. I never managed to connect with people. I was convinced there was something wrong with me ever since I can remember. I was never able to fit in. But when I’m with him I’m… happy, somehow. Happier than I’ve been for years. For so long, I thought I would never feel any type of attachment to anyone, that I was practically doomed to live alone for the rest of my days. When I’m with him, I forget about all of this. I don’t know how to deal with that.”

You pause and she notices who you’ve been staring at all along. “Have you told him that?”You quickly snap back to her. “Are you insane?! Of course not!” You cross your arms over your chest, frowning.

“Maybe it would be worth giving it a try?” Her tone is soft and caring. For someone who hadn’t known you for that long, she seemed to understand you intimately.

Her question makes you wonder. A part of you wants to see where this would go, it’s true; you were curious about the possible outcome of this relationship. You had made peace with the fact that you would live on your own forever. You were always seen by others as a cold, ruthless sorceress. It wasn’t your fault your powers were stronger than the rest of your kind, but nonetheless, it put you aside from the rest. Traveling with this group of weirdos is the most proximity you’ve had with people for years. A lot of these experiences with people are very new to you. You take one more sip of wine, your last resort to deal with those feelings.

Shadowheart takes your silence as an answer. “You know, you deserve happiness just as much as the rest of us,” she gets up and pats your shoulder. “You should at least consider it,” she says, before leaving for her tent.

You stay there for a few moments, pondering about what she just told you. You take a deep breath and get up to walk towards the lonely pale elf with your wine-induced courage. After all, what’s the worst that could happen?

“Hey,” you approach him awkwardly.

“Well hello there,” he turns to you, “to what do I owe the pleasure of your presence?”

“Just wanted to see how you were faring, after today. Everyone’s enjoying the night, some people are even heading to bed, but I didn’t see you mingling with the others.”

“Oh darling, I’m doing just great on my own,” he gestures with the bottle of wine in hand. “Don’t you worry your pretty little head.”

“Of course you do.” you roll your eyes. “Well, good. I’m glad.”

There’s a silence shared between the two of you then. You get this strong feeling in your chest that you need to express and yet, you just can’t bring yourself to say it. Everytime you part your lips to say it, the words get stuck in your throat. Maybe you’re not drunk enough to go on about your unspoken feelings. Maybe some things are simply better left unsaid, after all. You sigh and shake your head, abandoning your initial intentions.

“Well, I wouldn’t want to bother you any more than I already have,” you give him a soft smile. “Have a good night, Astarion,” as you turn to walk away, your smile disappears, leaving only disappointment. It quickly turns into surprise when you feel Astarion swiftly grabbing you by your wrist, stopping you in your tracks.

“Wait,” he says. Your eyes meet and you notice a change in his expression, his eyes soften. “I get the feeling there’s something you’re not telling me, is there?”

“It’s nothing!” You force a smile. “We had a big day, I’m just tired and you must be too, I suppose, I wouldn’t want to keep you from resting,” your eyes fall to the ground, avoiding his glare.

He takes a step towards you, closing the short distance.

“You don’t need to go,” his voice is deeper.

“Listen, you really don’t have to do this, we slept together and it was great and it can just stay like that, there’s no need–”

He lifts your chin up to face him and you stop rambling instantly. You feel your heart pounding in your chest, your eyes locking with his.

“Tell me, what would you do if I kissed you, right now?” he asks, his voice barely a whisper.

Your eyes flutter open, your breath catching in your throat, “I would kiss you back.”

His eyes fall on your lips and you close your eyes as he lifts your chin higher and your lips collide. He kisses you with a tenderness you never would have imagined, with one hand holding your waist closer and the other moving from your chin to your cheek. You feel as if your heart is going to explode ; you kissed him before, but it was nothing like that. At this moment, time stopped, just for the two of you.

He parts from you carefully, remaining close. Your eyes open up to find him looking at you with his eyes darkened with lust. Given how you felt your breathing quickening and your face burning, you must’ve been looking at him with the same intensity. Finally, you speak up.

“Do you… wanna share my tent tonight?”

He smiles with half-lidded eyes. “I thought you would never ask.”

Maybe it’s the alcohol in your veins giving you the courage, but you find yourself kissing him back eagerly, getting lost in his embrace, and it takes everything in you to actually make it back to your tent with Astarion. The second you’re inside, you’re both removing each other’s clothing, recklessly throwing them away. You drunkenly stumble on your back and try to suppress your laughter before Astarion is over you, kissing you again. First your lips, then your neck, and your chest, down to your navel, and the mount between your legs.

Each kiss from him has you moaning so easily, as if he played you like an instrument. You don’t make the effort of even trying to suppress the sounds you make, you’ll just blame it on the alcohol tomorrow morning. His touch felt so good against your skin, like a healing balm over each wound from your past. His next kiss over your folds has you arching your back, and he grabs a hold of your legs in response, grounding you down. His breath over your pussy sends a river of chills up your spine and you tightly grab onto your bedroll’s blankets for support.

His tongue slipping between your wet folds makes you cry out instantly, as your core is extremely sensitive to any touch in your condition. You try to buck your hips against his tongue and his hold on you only gets stronger.

“Mhh, don’t you wanna be good for me?” He asks, between your legs.

“Y– yes,” you pant.

“Then stay still for me, love.”

His sweet words combined by his masterful tongue plunging into you make you whimper. He devours you as if you were his first meal in days, lapping at your entrance, drinking you in, tasting everything you have to offer. His nose, carefully placed over your clit, teases your sweet spot and you feel yourself nearing your climax. Sensing your desperation, Astarion loosens his grip on your hips, allowing you more movement. Your hands get lost in his curls, lightly pulling them to guide his face over your sensitive area. The build up in your stomach finally releases and you scream as the wave hits you like electricity throughout your body. Your hands fly to your sides, grabbing onto your bedroll for dear life, with the vampire between your legs ravishing you still.

You cry out, pleading with him as the feeling becomes overwhelming and he leaves your sex to move back up, lifting your legs up in the process. Your lips meet with his, and you taste yourself on his tongue. You get lost in the feeling, messily kissing him back, only parting slightly to allow yourself to breathe. His hands sneak down to grab your wrists and pin them next to your head before burying himself right into your cunt.

His thrusts are slow and deep, hitting the back of your hole every time. By now, you’re a panting mess, you’re seeing stars, and the only words leaving your mouth are his name, over and over again, each time more jumbled than the last.

“I do love the way you say my name,” he murmurs.

“A– Astarion…”

“Just like that,” he purrs. “You’re doing so good for me.”

“Astarion…”

“My good girl.”

He pauses between his thrusts, getting stronger and stronger, and making you moan louder and louder. With his last stroke, he dives teeth first into your neck, drinking you in. He drinks from you like a starved man, his pace becoming ruthless. You feel him growl against your neck, his teeth sending a vibration through your skin, before removing his fangs from you. He picks up a punishing pace, drilling into you.

“You’re mine.”“I’m… yours…” you barely manage to get the words out.

“Go on, be a good girl for me, tell everyone who you belong to.”

His words of praise send you over the edge again, you feel as if your soul was leaving your body, with your back arching into him, your eyes rolling in the back of your head and the air leaving your lungs as you scream out his name. Your cunt squeezes his cock and with a last hit, he releases himself inside of you, growling into your ear as he does so. His thrusts become erratic, filling you with his seed. You’re completely overwhelmed and your body trembles with the sensation. Astarion stays still inside of you, your warmth around his length providing him some sense of security as he comes down from his own high. He lifts his head up carefully, and his hands leave your wrist to hold your face instead, your foreheads barely touching.

You felt like in this instant, you could forget about all the misery you experienced, and with him, you could start anew ; he made you feel whole in so many ways.

“Darling? Are you alright?”

With your head between his hands, he strokes your cheeks tenderly, wiping the tears from your exhausted eyes as you admire each detail in his expression.

I think I’m in love with you. The words resonate loudly in your head.

He chuckles softly, “Of course you do. How about we leave the love confessions for when you’re less inebriated, hm?”

Loud enough to leave your lips, it seems. If he didn’t answer, you would’ve believed you only thought about saying those dreaded words.

You hum and feel the weight of the day crash upon you and fatigue taking over you as Astarion holds you close, lulling you to sleep.

—

The next morning you awaken, and you're surprised to find Astarion still wrapped tightly around you.

His skin is warmer than usual, probably a result from sleeping skin to skin with you. After your confession from last night, you were scared he would leave you in the middle of the night, like the first time you slept together. You’re glad to find him still cuddled up next to you. You’re aware elves don’t normally sleep, but he seemed so peaceful, his face was relaxed and you could trace his smile lines next to his lips, and his curly hair slightly falling over his eyes.

Too afraid to end this precious moment, but still wanting to be closer to him, you nudge yourself into his arms, your nose touching his chest. You’re unsure if he’s conscious, but part of you thinks it would be better if he wasn’t. Relishing this moment of comfort with him, you mumble your next words against his chest.

“I’m… not expecting you to say it back, but I meant what I said yesterday. I don’t know where this’ll go, but I know I want to be with you.”

You feel his arms hold you tighter against him.

You sigh in relief. Whether his movements were intentional, whether he heard you or not, you’re glad to have finally gotten that weight off your chest.

Maybe you can learn to be happy again.

I’ve never felt like this before

My heart knew I couldn’t

And then you take me in

And everything in me begins to feel like I belong

Like everybody needs a home

And when I take your hand

Like the world has never held a man

I know I cannot heal the hurt

But I will hold you here forever

If I can, if I can

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