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incorrect-sdv-quotes · 3 years

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Okay so I know this is a SDV Incorrect quote blog but I really wanted to show off my SDV headcanon’s so you may ignore this post if you wish (I’ll go back to the normal posts after this, I have like 13 quotes queue’d up right now)

Headcanon’s under the cut:

1.Alex’s real first name is Alexander he just prefers to go by Alex

2.Alex is a trans male so he was born female but transitioned to male at age 13

3.The bachelors ages are (listed youngest to oldest):

Alex: 19

Sebastian: 19 (one month older then Alex)

Sam: 20

Harvey: 25-30

Elliott: 36

Shane: 38

4.Despite Sam being older then him Alex is taller (if you put them side by side Sam looks taller but that’s only cause of his hair if you flattened it you could see Alex was taller)

5.Sebastian is secretly a vampire (He does look like one anyway)

6. Haley and Alex kind of have a Hazel and Xander from Bunk’d relationship where they’re kinda friends but one of them *cough cough* Haley *cough* has a huge crush on the other to where it’s at yandere point- Haley is not QUITE as crazy about Alex that Hazel is about Xander and unlike Hazel Haley can hide the craziness she does have around people but when it’s just her and Alex she’s all crazy and clingy-

Like, she’ll call him pet names like “My jock prince” or “Alex-zandy-” or “My knight in shining armor” Etc. etc- or hug him and never let go until someone LITERALLY prys her off- Talk about nutty nutty nut-so-

7. My headcanon voices for the bachelors are: (Well some of them, if a name is in strike through that means I don’t have one for that one- yet)

Alex: Shining Armor from MLP

Sebastian

Sam: Rottmnt Leo/2020 Sonic the Hedgehog/Dewy from Ducktails (this one might change)

Harvey: Fozzie Bear (Harvey: WaKa WaKa (I’m sorry))

Elliott: Gunther from Shake It Up

Shane

8.Shane is basically the god of chickens he’s such a good caretaker of chickens that he could summon an army of chickens to peck the eyes out of everyone in town with one “Babock” CHICKEN ARMY!!

If you decided to read this post and you liked my headcanons then this is it for now more might be added later as I play the game and scroll through the SDV tags on Tumblr more

EDIT 1: More headcanons!:

9: Elliott is an amazing actor but a horrid horror-movie actor (It’s just his screams are unrealistic he will literally just say “Aaaah” otherwise it’s the same as the rest of his acting) (This scream-glitch is an easy fix if you yell “Ghost” more on that in 10)

10: Elliott is TERRIFIED of ghosts even those cute and/or clearly fake ghosts (Why else do you think Spirits Eve/Halloween has Skeletons every year and not ghosts? No one wants to scare anyone Too bad.) Actually Alex dared Elliott to watch the Disney Junior show Vampirina which went fine until Demi came on screen- Elliott literally wet himself and screamed for 3 whole hours- (Poor Alex who had to listen to that the whole time-)

11: Elliott treats his pocket crab as his ACTUAL son, not as his pet but as his actual biological son (it’s actually really cute)

12: The portraits in this video for a portraits mod is how the characters actually look to me (Excluding Elliott Sam and Sebastian they still live in my brain with their cannon looks): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cmBW8BzSZpU&list=WL&index=1&t=5s

13: Krobus is Sebastian’s father (yeah you THINK it would not make sense along with Hc numb.5 but if you think about it if his father is a monster and his mother is human he’s gonna be born as a human-looking monster! Which is a Vampire!)

EDIT 2: Damnit. I was scrolling through this and I realized I missed a Hc and it slipped through the original post and the EDIT 1!

14: Alex has Dyslexia (this bugger Hc belonged in the original post but it slipped through both edits)

EDIT 3: MORE HEADCANNONS-

15: Both Abigail and Sebastian used to have hair to match their parents (Abby’s was brown (Like said in game) and Sebastian’s was Ginger) but due to their “Unusual” parents (Abigail: Wizard Sebastian: Krobus) their hair changed color when they got older and their mothers just pretended they died their hair so both the towns people and Abigail and Sebastian themselves would not freak out

16: Sebastian has snake bite piercing's but he only wears them when he’s alone (he got them in the first place cause 1: Sam dared him and 2: he decided it would be a fun way to rebel against dead to Sebastian Demetrius, he didn’t have to keep them but he ended up liking the look)

17: Sebastian owns a giant frog plush, it’s twice the size of him, is really soft and is incredibly fat (it’s to the point it’s just a circle that has stubby legs) he loves it more then anything Excluding Alex but he does not want anyone finding out he loves it let alone owns it so he stuffs it under his bed when people are in and/or near his room

18: Sebastian’s first word was literally “Froggy”

Ex:

Robin: Can you say “mama”?

Baby!Sebastian: ...Froggy!

Robin:

Robin: Out of all words your first word is “Froggy”? Really?

19: The shortest to tallest Bachelors are:

Shane

Sam (If you take his hair and go *Squishes flat*)

Alex

Sebastian

Sam (If you count the added height from his Mullet)

Harvey

Elliott (Tall stinky sea dude)

20: Sam got Sebastian to scream “Bubbles” for 5 hours straight

Details on that:

Sam: It’s impossible to say “Bubbles” threateningly

Sebastian:

Five munities later:

Robin: Uhhhh Sam? Why is my son on the roof screaming “BUBBLES”?

21: Sebastian owns a biker jacket but he only wears it when riding his motorcycle cause the jacket makes him look way more goth then emo and he prefers the emo look over goth look despite he acts more like a goth

22: One Feast of The Winter Star Sebastian got everyone an empty box and when they opened it Seb said: “It’s a void of nothingness. Just like life.” He did not get in trouble or nothing cause your allowed to give what you want but he did not do that again

23: Sebastian requires glasses to read, he can see perfectly but when it comes to reading on a computer or on paper he needs glasses

24: Sam does a perfect Darth Vader voice and Darth Vader breathing noises

25: Sebastian has vampire powers (cause he is a vampire (Hc 5)), he knows about them and is chill about it but he does not use them unless necessary cause he just does not feel the need to use them otherwise (His powers include, immortality (he also can’t be killed cause on my take on Vampires the stuff that “Traditionally” harms/kills them is just a mith and actually does nothing to them), super strength, increased speed, fast self-healing, telekinesis (I know this is not “Traditionally” a vampire power but Seb does have it) and the ability to change into a bat)

26: Both Sebastian and Elliott are actually pretty jacked (Not Alex level jacked but still) you just can’t see it unless they’re shirt-less (but in Seb’s case at least loose the hoodie)

27: Harvey’s doctor’s mallet weapon is just as heavy and as big as himself so he rarely goes into combat cause he has trouble welding his own weapon-

Harvey: Time to explore the mines! *grabs his giant doctors mallet*

Harvey: Nope going down. *falls backward with a thud*

28: Elliott carries at least one very sharp pencil with him at all times so if he sees a very annoying person or a slime that escaped the mines he’ll grab it and go *StAb*

29: Everyone else makes Hermit jokes around Elliott which he finds funny and annoying at the same time (They used to do the jokes about Sebastian as well but they stopped cause when they did Seb strangled them Darth Vader style) Ex of the hermit jokes:

*singing* Someone’s on the beach with a hermit! There’s a hermit on the beach I know I know! Someone’s on the beach with a hermiiiit! And the hermit’s name is Elliott!

30: If you think Elliott’s cannon SDV schedule is anti-social you should see how anti-social he gets when writing a book-

EDIT 4: Surprise, there’s more

31: Elliott is a mermaid merman (he’s a human by day half human half fish by night but he’ll change forms sooner if you dump water on him- found that out by Haley throwing water on him in hopes he’ll melt-)

32: When in ‘fish’ form Elliott’s tail is incredibly strong (if you get hit by it you’ll go flying 900 feet in the air in 5 seconds at full strength)

33:Elliott only lets Harvey call him “Elly” if anyone else does so expect Elliott to dump water on himself then hit you with his fish tail)

34:Vincent will sing The Little Mermaid song “Under the sea” around Elliott and Sebastian (Sebastian cause think about it and Elliott cause he’s an IRL Mermaid)

#sdv #stardew valley #sdv headcanons #stardew valley headcanons #headcanons #not a quote #I have to edit this like 100 times cause I'm dealing with a strikethrough glitch

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themurphyzone · 7 years

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All Time Travelers Go to Heaven Ch 8

Thanks for being patient everyone. I was playing catch up on MLP: FIM.

Ch 8- A New Name

The child was still asleep. The serum must have been more taxing on his body than Balthazar and Vinnie realized. Vinnie had prepared an extra plate of breakfast, but now it would need to be warmed up. For someone who had been a science experiment his entire life, the kid was unusually trusting.

Balthazar made a mental note to call Brick and Savannah and ask them for an update on their investigation. And if they knew a safe place for a young boy away from the prying eyes of the Bureau.

“Dakota, do you think it’s all right to wake him up now?” Balthazar asked, his hand hovering uncertainly over the child’s shoulder. “I’d prefer that he doesn’t sleep all morning.” He moved the backpack aside so he wouldn’t trip over it, then his curiosity got the better of him. Opening the flap, he found all sorts of objects in the Jinx’s backpack. Some weren’t out of the ordinary, a plastic bag containing a few nuts, or a small paperback book. Then he found an anchor and three hedge trimmers.

Hedge trimmers could fit in some backpacks, but most people didn’t keep one on hand. The anchor, however, couldn’t be explained. Balthazar concluded that the backpack was invented at the Bureau. There was no other explanation for how it could hold an anchor and the child had no issue carrying it around. He closed the backpack and moved it aside.

Vinnie peeked in from the kitchen. “Okay, go ahead and wake him up. And ask him if he wants milk or OJ. It’s the cooler way to say orange juice.”

Balthazar nodded, shaking the Jinx’s shoulder gently. “It’s ten in the morning,” he said softly. “It’s imperative that you eat to keep your strength up.”

The Jinx yawned, pushing himself up. “Morning. Do I get to pet a horse now? Wait...” Rubbing his eyes, he glanced around in confusion. “But the barn! And, and the hay! I thought I was gonna have to pick hay off my clothes for sure this morning!”

“Yes, well,” Balthazar cleared his throat. “Bales of hay are rather ill-suited for an apartment. What you experienced last night was a hallucination brought about by fear serum. We shall be keeping you here for the day to make sure the serum has run its course. However, I expect you to be ready for a trip to the store tomorrow so that we can buy you some clothes.”

“Oh, wow,” the child murmured, bringing his knees to his chest and resting his head. “I can’t believe I thought that was real. I still think it’s real.” He took a deep, shuddering breath.

Balthazar patted his back. “Let’s get some food into you now. Do you prefer milk or orange juice? I think you’ll quite enjoy Dakota’s cooking.”

“Orange juice is fine, thanks,” he replied.

“He wants orange juice!” Balthazar shouted.

“One glass of OJ coming right up!”

He helped the child off the couch, realizing that he was still in the same clothes from yesterday. A couch leg snapped off, and a loose spring caused one of the cushions fly out and smack Balthazar in the face. He coughed indignantly, throwing the cushion back in its proper place.

“Sorry!” the child yelped. “I didn’t mean for Murphy’s Law to cause you any trouble.” He hesitantly sat down at the table, taking a sip of his juice. The microwave beeped, and Vinnie pulled out a plate of eggs and bacon, taking a piece of toast out from the toaster and setting it all in front of their guest.

“This is the second time I’ve heard about this Murphy’s Law. What exactly makes it so dangerous?” Balthazar asked, sitting down on the seat next to him.

Vinnie lightly smacked him in the shoulder. “Any questions you have can wait until after he’s finished. Look at the kid, he’s practically a skeleton!”

His shirt did look rather large on him. And those bruises would probably be stinging too. But it was nothing a little ointment couldn’t fix.

“No a skeleum,” the child said through a mouthful of bacon.

“Don’t talk with your mouth full,” Balthazar chided. “Wonderful. He’s got your eating habits.”

Were they denying him food at the Bureau? That would explain why he was so thin....

But some children were naturally thin. Maybe it wasn’t anything to worry about.

He polished everything, his mouth surrounded by crumbs. “That was the best breakfast ever!” he exclaimed.

“Wipe your face and brush your teeth,” Balthazar said. “The bathroom is the first door on the right. And after this, we’re giving you an proper name. It would be quite rude of us to call you ‘child’ or ‘the Jinx’ all the time.”

“That’s really nice, but I wouldn’t even know what to call myself!” He headed to the bathroom, slinging his backpack over his shoulder.

Vinnie began washing the dishes, humming thoughtfully. “There’s gotta be something we can work off,” he said. “I know! Let’s name him Elvis!”

“Elvis,” Balthazar scoffed.

“What?” Vinnie asked innocently. “Okay, well, Frank or Ringo work too. Though he doesn’t really look like a Frank now that I think about it.”

“You are not naming him after musicians from decades long ago!” Balthazar complained.

Vinnie shrugged. “It wasn’t that long ago. So what would you name the kid, since you kindly shot down my suggestions?”

“Something respectable. Such as Bartholomew or Sebastian,” Balthazar replied. Vinnie snickered. “What? They’re perfectly good names!”

“We already have one long name in this room that begins with ‘ba’ and nobody wants to name their kid Sebastian unless they want him to grow up to be a butler,” Vinnie said. “Besides, they’re completely outdated.”

Before Balthazar could make a comeback, there was a loud crash from the bathroom. He rushed to the bathroom, knocking on the door. “Are you all right?” he called.

“I’m fine! The bar holding up the shower curtain broke and I fell trying to fix it! I think I got it now!” There was a clang of metal against the tile. “Never mind.”

“Would it be all right to come in so I can look at it myself?” Balthazar asked. “You’re going to hurt yourself if you try putting up the bar on your own.”

“Sure, one sec!” There was another crash. “Whoops....”

He opened the door, and Balthazar was relieved to find the sink and toilet in one piece. However, the shelf that held their shampoo bottles had toppled over, scattering the supplies around the toilet. It split down the middle when he picked it up.

The child was staring at a spot on the wall, refusing to look at Balthazar. Vinnie leaned against the door, placing a comforting hand on the child’s shoulder. “Don’t worry about it. This place is falling apart on us anyway. Besides, Balthazar was always saying something about replacing that shelf. Guess you helped remind him.”

“Fine. I think we have some spare wood in storage,” Balthazar said, heaving the bar over his head and putting it in its proper place. “Ah, there we are. Easily fixable. Meet us at the table when you’re done. Since Dakota and I can’t agree on a name, it would only be right to let you decide what to call yourself.”

The Jinx nodded. Balthazar and Vinnie left him to his own devices, closing the bathroom door behind them.

“I can’t believe you actually finished a mission,” a feminine voice said. They turned around to find Savannah smirking at them. “Congratulations on your adoption, by the way.”

“Thanks!” Vinnie exclaimed. “Sorry about the apartment. We weren’t expecting company.”

Balthazar crossed his arms. “How did you get in here? And where’s Brick?”

“Whoa,” Savannah studied her nails. “Direct. Didn’t expect that either. To answer your first question, your front door is broken. Brick is...incapacitated at the moment.”

“Oh. Did he get injured when you were investigating the Bureau?” Vinnie asked. “Because that guy is built like...well, a brick.”

She shook her head. “No. Our first investigation went smoothly. We went to a bar afterwards and Brick had a little too much to drink. Don’t ever be around him when he’s on a hangover. He gets...needy. But I digress. I’ve come to warn you that agents of all ranks will be hunting you down. Your stunt at the asylum has propelled you to the top of the Bureau’s Most Wanted. They’ll be wanting to cash in on the hefty reward.”

“But how do they know we took him?” Balthazar growled.

“Henry and Lawson blabbed,” Savannah said. “Honestly. You never bothered to conceal your identity. You were easily recognized. The camera feed from the broken robot confirmed their story.”

He had overlooked the important details.

Again.

When they went shopping tomorrow, they would need a lot of clothes. While Balthazar could overlook how his green formal suit was outdated in the 21st century, it was clear that he would need to change his style. They would all need to change their style to avoid capture.

He didn’t wish interrogation on his worst enemy, much less a child.

“I suggest you start searching for other places you can stay,” Savannah said. “They’re eventually going to find you here. But I should get going now. I promised Brick I would pick up some medicine. We’ll keep you updated. Goodbye.”

And she was gone.

Balthazar glanced at the broken front door. “I hate to agree, but she has a point. It would be disastrous if an agent could just walk through there. We wouldn’t be able to hop through a portal in time. Perhaps we can add scouting out alternate places to stay to our to-do list tomorrow.”

“I know some great restaurants that have posh lobbies we could sleep in. Or heck, even in the main dining area after hours,” Vinnie said. “And we wouldn’t have to worry about food either.”

Balthazar nodded. “While I would normally be cursing your appetite, a restaurant wouldn’t come to mind for any of our potential captors as a place of rest. Staying at a motel would be too obvious, and we wouldn’t have enough money for the long term. Perhaps schools would be a good option too. Of course, we’d have to be careful staying at all these public establishments so we don’t get caught by the police or employees.”

“I’m done!” the Jinx yelled. His cowlick was flopped over his face, still sopping wet. “And your showerhead only fell twice! Don’t worry, I didn’t break it.”

He was still wearing those dull clothes from the Bureau. “Hey, kid. How about for the rest of the day you take one of my undershirts?” Vinnie asked. “You were sleeping in that last night.”

“You sure about this? I don’t want to be any trouble....”

Balthazar nodded. “Your current shirt is better suited for dusting a mantle. As long as you’re living under this roof, you will follow certain rules. Dakota’s shirts are kept in the bottom drawer of the bedroom. I would greatly prefer that you don’t touch anything else.”

Vinnie coughed.

“Please,” Balthazar hastily added. “And after this, we shall no longer put off matters of your name.”

To his relief, the Jinx managed to change his shirt without incident. After that, they sat down at the table with a baby name book that Vinnie had in his possession.

For some reason. Maybe he had been born into a large family.

He flipped through the pages uncertainly. “There are so many names to choose from. And that’s not even counting languages besides English!”

“Take your time,” Balthazar said. “Maybe we could find something that goes with your surname, if you know it.”

The Jinx shook his head. “The only names I know are the scientists and Murphy’s Law.”

“Wait! I’ve got it! We’ll name you Vinnie Junior!” Vinnie exclaimed. He held up his hand expectantly, frowning when Balthazar folded his arms and the Jinx stared at his hand. “Aw, c’mon! It’s rude to leave a guy hanging, you know!”

“What are you trying to do?” the Jinx asked curiously.

Vinnie gasped. “You don’t know what a high-five is? They really don’t teach you important social cues at the Bureau, do they? Just slap your palm against mine.”

“I don’t want to hurt you though,” the Jinx rubbed his neck, shrinking in his seat.

Vinnie winked at him. “Trained agent here. Look, Balthy and I will show you.”

This time, Balthazar high-fived him without a fuss. When Vinnie gave him a puzzled look, Balthazar frowned. “I didn’t high five you the first time because I refuse to encourage your lackluster naming skills.”

The Jinx grinned. “Well in that case, high five!” His palm brushed by Vinnie’s, only hitting his knuckle.

Vinnie shrugged, leaning back in his chair. “Eh, first time for everything.”

Balthazar watched in amusement as the Jinx flipped through the book, murmuring softly to himself. He slammed his finger down on ‘Henry’, only to shake his head and continue searching for a different name. For five minutes, he was stuck on ‘Aaron’ and ‘Leo’, then decided he didn’t like either of them.

Vinnie opened a pretzel bag, offering some to the Jinx, who distractedly put the pretzel stick in his mouth and sucked on the end while skimming through the ‘R’ section.

An hour later, the Jinx had four names written on a post-it that he wanted to use process of elimination on. Curiously, they all started with ‘M’: Mikey, Mason, Micah, and Milo.

“I grew up hearing Murphy’s Law thrown around all the time,” he explained sheepishly. “So I definitely want Murphy for my surname. Maybe I can turn the tables, make something good out of misfortune. The alliteration’s just a bonus. I guess out of these, Micah sounds a little old-fashioned for me.” He looked at Balthazar. “Not that there’s anything wrong with that!”

Balthazar was glad that the child hadn’t heard his original suggestions for names. He would have been just as mortified as Vinnie, if not more. “Old fashioned isn’t for everybody,” he said. “Three choices now.”

Vinnie snorted. “Definitely not for me. Otherwise I’d be trapped in a boring stuffy suit all the time.”

Balthazar rolled his eyes. The Jinx crossed off Mason as well, though he didn’t voice his reason for doing so.

“Mikey Murphy...Milo Murphy...Mikey Murphy...Milo Murphy,” he murmured.

“Down to these two! Then maybe we can pick a middle name!” Vinnie said. “Wouldn’t it be funny if we went with a ridiculously long name?”

Balthazar put his hand over Vinnie’s mouth so the Jinx could concentrate. “He’s not a royal. From the looks of it anyway. There’s no need for a long name unless the person in question has a ridiculously overblown ego.”

It took ten more minutes of silent debate, but the Jinx looked up from the post-it, smiling. “Okay, I’ve decided. From this day forward, I will be known as Milo Murphy!”

He stood up in his chair, pounding his fist in the air. Balthazar gestured for him to sit down before he could fall.

“Welcome to the team, Milo Murphy,” Balthazar said, patting Milo’s back. Milo glanced up at him, his eyes sparkling with glee at not being referred to as a Jinx. “This will not be all sunshine and fun. Danger will be our middle names on this road we have chosen. But follow our instructions, and you shall be safe.”

“Whoa, that’s cool!” Milo exclaimed. “And I choose Danger to be my middle name! Except, maybe pronounce it like Don-zhay, to differentiate from the actual word.”

“Milo Danger Murphy has a nice ring to it, don’t you think?” Vinnie asked, smiling as Milo danced around the apartment with a newfound spring in his step. If Balthazar hadn’t seen it with his own eyes, he would’ve refused to believe that this was the same child cowering under an umbrella less than 24 hours ago.

Balthazar nodded. “An incredibly nice ring. And our mission is to protect the boy behind the name.”

#milo murphy's law #all time travelers go to heaven #mml au #balthazar cavendish #vinnie dakota

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