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theresonlysofarnewmoneygoes · 7 years

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Pestering you about headcanons

thank you!!! here is what i have, feel free to add!!! also, this is all hogwarts yeshiva style, where everyone is jewish, no questions asked.

and without further ado, purim-potter headcanons:

so the atmosphere during adar is very fun, and certain students take the whole v'nahafochuh thing incredibly seriously. on rosh chodesh adar of the marauders’ first year, hogwarts wakes up to find all the portraits were turned upside down in the middle of the night. a great laugh and good fun. by sixth year they manage to figure out how to mix charms and transfiguration spells together and to make it last longer than a few hours. so roch chodesh of their sixth year, hogwarts wakes up to find the entire school in gryffindor colours. all the banners in the great hall are gryffindor banners. all the carpeting is scarlet, the railings gold. every pet has been charmed to roar like a lion. and the snakes, badgers, and eagles have disappeared from every hogwarts crest in the castle.

(filch wants them to get detention till the omer ends, but mcgonagall is so impressed with the magic she actually ends up rewarding them with points. “enough, argus, it’s adar”)

and now we’ll get to the mitzvot! the mems! so we’ll start with shaluch manot (or mishlochai manot if you didn’t grow up with yiddish all around). i feel like at hogwarts you can either sign up for the school shaluch manot, and pay like a sickle for each person you’d like to deliver to, and then the school gives each person a basket with however much stuff people paid for for that particular person. you know, like how neighbourhoods do sometimes? or bnei akivah? but another option is signing up to do them on your own/with a group. so likes siblings often do together but then also so do really good friends (the marauders, say) and the list of everyone’s shaluch manot plans goes up a month before purim so that everyone can make lists of who they need to make for.

i see harry, like, signing up for the school shaluch manot in first year and being totally blown away when like every single student gives him one.

mrs weasley sends her kids and harry and hermione shaluch manot every year, of course, and they’re like, the family that goes all out. you know the one, with the huge basket with like five foods for every brachah “just in case!! haha:)” and you kinda hate them but also you have all this food!

first year is hermione’s first year where she has like…unlimited access to sugar. and she kinda has no idea what to do with herself. ron helps her. obviously.

i feel like the marauders would sign up to do a group shaluch manot every year and do some ridiculous theme. fifth year they totally did an animagus-werwolf theme. like dog-biscuit shaped cookies, sugar deer antlers or something, edible moon rocks, and the whole things on a rat’s wheel. and everyone’s like ?????? but they’re Dead™

hogwarts has every nusach ever for megillah reading. everyone who wants to hear a certain nusach for all holidays requests it at the beginning of the year and it’s the prefects’ job to find someone to read for each requested nusach by each holiday.

something that happened at my shul last night: after the whole “and mordechai cried a bitter and loud cry” bit, the reader paused, and then his son yelled really loudly and everyone in shul died laughing. anyway you can rest assured fred and george weasley did that, like, every year. also they definitely bring more and more ridiculous instruments for haman. like a trombone or something.

hermione for sure goes to the women’s reading and she even learns to read herself by fourth year! she learns it in the parsi nusach because she is a trash child and thinks it sounds more ~authentic that way. (“yeah but…you’re ashkie and ethiopian” “honestly, ronald, it’s set in shushan!”)

matanot l'evyonim is a touchy subject for ron because malfoy mocks him endlessly. there are a lot of options that the school organises to donate for, though, and hermione never stops trying to get them to open a kupah for the house elves.

lily evans, in her fourth year, organises a kupah for werewolves. she does it in such a sneaky way that like james, sirius, and peter have no idea where she got the idea from but remus knows. and she manages to collect fifty galleons from the whole school that year, and that purim remus truly feels like he doesn’t need to be the one accepting any tzdakah, he has so much and he only wants to give.

mishteh. dear lord. how hogwarts does that feast. dumbledore books the most amazing entertainment every year. once they got this miming troupe that acted out the story of purim and the students went nuts. and they’ve always got music playing from ever-spinning groggers and the food is all purim-themed, of course. like a gallows-shaped caked. fifty amot high, not an ammah less.

and the costumes. there’s a contest: best group, best pair, best single. most creative, noisiest, most impressive magic involved.

i can just imagine lily evans just coming up with the absolute laziest costumes ever. like in fifth year, she borrows hestia jones’ badge and and she’s a ravenclaw prefect. or third year, when she goes as a muggle. or seventh, when she steals james’ robes and goes as a quidditch player (although he is absolutely thrilled with it) (and let’s be honest lily, it took just a little bit of effort to hide all your plans from him, that year)

#lizo talks #purim #asks #anon #headcanons #jumblr #hp headcanons #this was fun!!!!#talk to me about my jewish james potter obsession

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