#sense that i have no friends or that my personality sucks ykwim? like | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

moonjxsung · 1 month

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ugh your response just ugggghhhhhh speaks to my soul. giggling and kicking my feet at how much u fit the minho agenda

i haven’t really been in too many relationships, but the ones that I have been in have been so terrible for my sexual identity. let’s get into it.

I’m extremely introverted, (but very open and bubbly around my friends/fam/inner circle ykwim?), but most of the time super shy and anxious ESP in public places that involve advocating for myself with ordering food or asking someone else for anything etc. I HATE IT I JUST WANT TO RUN AND HIDE AND RAHHHHHH

haven’t always been like this, i was a super extroverted kid, but i think as I’ve grown up and gone through a number of experiences in which I’ve lost that confidence and ignorant bliss that i used to have, my personality evolved as a result.

anywaysssss, my most recent ex was very extroverted but also very controlling, (which i ignored for way too long to not be affected by) however he lacked the ability to give me that safe feeling that i need in a relationship—i need a dom partner who uses that power dynamic in a loving and affirming way towards me, if that makes sense? like i get a lot of comfort from affirming words from the person im with in that dom position.

( the ex was a fucking waste of human . When i tried testing the waters to come out to him, he told me that if i was “gay”(meaning anything but straight) he would immediately break up with me and would have never dated me, he never made me cum even one time, and cheated on me :D )

anyways.

I’m such a sub but tbh would maybe be open to versing IF my partner was into that? yeah i feel like that was an even more submissive thing to say than saying I’m a sub goodbye🧍🏽‍♀️

had to add the babygirl princess himself

Thank u for adding babygirl hanji he cleansed the palate after listening to your shitty ex story good LORDDDDD….. the part about you trying to come out to him????? Sheesh what a fucking loser

I totally get what you mean about someone needing to establish a safe environment for you to be in that sort of dynamic. I definitely feel the same way in that I need to feel safety and security before literally anything else in a relationship and because I’m usually the one who prefers to be in control, I try my best to keep things as safe as possible, like opening the door for clear communication, making sure we’re both on the same page about what we want, establishing clear boundaries, etc. It sounds like your ex never valued any of that and that’s why it wasn’t the fit for you. I think it’s very easy to get caught up in that mindset of feeling like you have more control over someone outside of a romantic or sexual sense when you’re the one wearing the pants in a relationship, so I definitely just advocate for very clear communication and being able to express what we both want out of something. And I usually expect it back (though I always somehow get stuck talking to women who like to reap the benefits of a woman w inherently masculine traits without wanting to date an actual woman and it sucks lmao) but yeah, in short I just like to sort of be the person initiating everything and taking care of another person and establishing a safe space for both of us to just be comfortable and safe with each other. That’s another reason I’m really attracted to introverts and shy people because I can sorta facilitate those conversations and check in w them to make sure they’re comfortable and the dynamic is just…. something I’m very attracted to lmao

You’ll definitely have your share of SHITTY fucking people and you’ll have to sort of learn what you want out of a relationship but I have no doubt you’re going to find someone who treats you like the absolute angel you are 🫶 don’t ever settle for less than you deserve and know that your scummy ex doesn’t determine what’s still out there for you. You deserve to be safe and loved and taken care of and your ex deserves to rot in hell

Sending u all my love little angel xoxoxoxo 💞💞💖💗💝💞💕💓👼🫶

#ask

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soov-archived · 1 year

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hi rei! can you give me tips on how to write like you and improve my vocabulary? please i badly wanna write so good like you 😭😭😭😭

HELLO ANON!!!!! dhdhkf thank you sm 😿 that's such a huge compliment, tyvm!! <3

i'm not the best person to ask something like that bc even tho i've been speaking english since i was born, i still don't feel like my english is the best ?? ANW i'm not a pro writer but here are the tips that i use 😻😻

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i really like using synonyms instead of the word i first thought of when writing!!

for example, if i was gonna write “he likes champagne”, i change it to “he adores champagne”, or even something a bit more fancy (?) like “he relishes the champagne's bitter taste” (THAT SUCKED IM SORRYBUT YKWIM). when i do that i feel like my writing gets richer / better in some sense.

i don't like to keep repeating words or the same sentence structure, but i frequently can't jump out of it by myself. so what i do is search up “sentence starters” when i'm REALLY stuck and can't move on with my scene.

dictionaries (online or physical) are absolute LIFESAVERS !!! they normally have synonyms for the words so 🙏🙏 they're a blessing when you don't want to keep repeating the same thing over and over :)) this site is also amazing for adjective synonyms <3

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i also like putting details in the work instead of letting the whole thing plain...

...but sometimes i struggle with these details. like i tried to show in the first tip, it's cooler if you try to add things related to the five senses instead of only vision and audition (at least from my point of view).

like, when you're talking to someone, you're not only seeing their face and listening to them. depending on the environment, you're also smelling scents, feeling things w your hands or pain in your body, tasting something, or even thinking about a different thing that's not what your companion is talking about. these feelings also help to make the text richer!!

for example, imagine that two people are walking around the city and talking about pancakes (?), and the details are in bold :)

“pancakes with maple syrup are awful,” mary cringes, stuffing her left pocket with her manicured hand. “how can people enjoy it?”

daniel nods fervently. “exactly my thoughts!”

his knees falter, limbs burning after walking for three hours incessantly. daniel ponders for a minute while his friend keeps babbling, and his stomach rumbles. “yeah, but seriously, i'd eat a pile of pancakes with syrup right now if i could. i'm starving to death here.”

see ?? if you removed them, the text would still be good, but the details help the reader (and you) to imagine the scene more clearly.

OH but if you're struggling w them like i said i do sometimes, don't get attached to these details. in other words, don't stop or get stuck in a scene simply because you can't put loooots of small things. you don't need to overdo it. keep writing fun by making it enjoyable to you.

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talking about writing being enjoyable...

don't compare your writing to other person's writing and enjoy the process!!

what you do is unique and amazing. a thing that i learned here on tumblr is that there are times when you hate your writing, but lots of people enjoy it. 85% of the time i post a work that i despised, and think that i could do better. but when i see comments or reblogs w feedback i feel extremely happy because ppl liked it :)

+ even if you don't get a lot of feedback, don't think that your writing is bad, because it's not. every single writer in this world is still learning how to write. and don't write for the others, but firstly, write to yourself. try out new things or stay in your comfort zone, you don't need to make anyone happy but yourself, okay?

+ don't compare the amount of words you write with the others or things like that. i see lots of authors putting word trackers for their fics, and that's not wrong in any way but v cool!!! but if you feel pressured by those because your fic is not being written with the same pace that the other person, ignore it! write things on your own time.

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now, the not too enjoyable part

always plan your work before writing it !!!!!!!

yes, it sucks. yes, it is boring as hell. but at least have an outline (it can be a veeery big one) for your work. if you're feeling inspired, just go brainstorming ideas messily, and then sort their order out.

like, you can just write “they meet each other at X place, they become friends, they discover something about the other's past, they fight, they make up, end.”, or make it v detailed w dialogues and other things. you can make a simplified outline and write more ideas for the scenes as time goes by!!

i follow the “introduction > development > climax > ending” pattern. obviously, you don't need to follow it too or write an even amount of paragraphs for each one. again, writing should be fun, so make it fun!

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this tip is related to planning so :) yea

when you're writing a scene but can't go on, move to the next scene

even if you planned it out detail to detail, you may not get to write the moment exactly like you wanted every time. when this happens, it's better that you move on to the next one that you really wanted to write, and let the other to rot LMAO. just get back to writing it when you feel like you're ready, and try to not pressure yourself to write it or listen to anyone who might be pressuring you!

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last tip (?) more like a personal opinion.

i don't like to read other people's works to get inspiration from them / observe how they write. it just doesn't work for me because i feel like i don't get any inspiration at all or improve my vocabulary because of that (i still love to read tho 😿😿). plus, i think that getting inspiration from a fixed person might result on you subconsciously copying them once in a while, that's why i never read analyzing anyone's writing.

if it works for you though, do read lots of works while observing the author's mannerisms and things like that!

but however howbeit nonetheless yet anyway anyhow ‼️‼️ read a lot, even if you take or not inspiration from other works. it's important to always consume content to help your creativity flow better :D

oh and random fact ? but i revise my works on grammarly so it might help you too if you don't have a beta reader !!

again, i'm not a professional! these are the things i do when writing, and i hope they'll help you too!!! <3

#✶ ─ inbox.#✸ ─ anons.#I HOPE THIS HELPED ANON !!#im sorry for the lenght but 😿😿 yea

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omanu · 3 years

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dont insult me if we're not close, im not confident :/

#'wow you taste in X sucks'#me: yeah maybe it does #i hate being deranged but if i like something and someone tells ME that i my taste sucks i will agree n go down a spiral about how it makes #sense that i have no friends or that my personality sucks ykwim? like #it makes sense that i like stupid and boring and stuff cuz thats how i am stupid and boring lol #i wont take it too seriously cuz probably this is not what they meant im notnlike upset at them #but it makes me think about myself either way

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sunarintoes · 3 years

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Pretty Setter Squad Boyfriend Headcanons

part one can be found here II wc: 2.4k II includes: kageyama, suga, kenma, akaashi, semi and oikawa II atsumu and shirabu

rewriting because i cringe at the old hcs 😭

✗ Kagggggsss

✗ The emotionally constipated blueberry <3 oh yeahh 😎

✗ Okay well first off he can barely process his emotions (*cough* evidently *cough*)

✗ When you two first started going out he was quite shy and unsure of what to do so you may have had to guide him a bit, but if youre equally shy then it just would have taken longer to get to where you are now; oh and if that was the case it probably took some random burst of energy/confidence from either one of you to make the first move.

✗ He will buy you milk but uf you hate it (like me 🤢) he will buy you another drink - like juice :D

✗ I dont think he will be the most affectionate, it’s not his love language - and neither are words haHAH. His love language is most likely quality time and gift giving.

✗ He does like to cuddle though 😳

✗ In fact he really likes to :D his favourite is when youre sitting in his lap while he watches a volleyball game (at home - he hates pda).

✗ This brings us to our next, short point. Kageyama absolutely despises pda, he just thinks its something meant for closed doors and he does not believe that he has to display his relationship for the whole world to ogle at. The most he will do is light hand holding - mostly just linking your pinkies though.

✗ When it comes to height he does not care if you're smaller or taller than him ← but bb, please don't tease him about his height if he’s shorter because he will blow a fuse.

✗ He alternates between small spoon and big spoon, kinda depending on his mood.

✗ BOY O BOY does he get jealous. Uh please reign in your setter >:(

✗ Its mostly due to the fact that he’s insecure about himself - he thinks you will leave him like everyone else (in middle school - yes, he is still traumatised from it.)

✗ When he does get jealous he might be snappy to the other person and glare at them or be snappy at you and glare at you. When this happens please give him space because he needs it to clear his head. When he feels better he will come up to you and hug you into his chest so that he can’t see your face and you cant see his, then he will mumble an apology.

✗ Ever since you two began to date he has practiced apologising and getting better at apologising, this is because his inability to admit to his own mistakes was a sour patch in your relationship that almost ended it but he really did not want to lose you so he sucked up his pride and worked on what he had to; of course you also worked in what you had to. God I love character development 😩

✗ Dates are mostly at home dates or dates revolving around volleyball. If you're not into volleyball, Kageyama would not date you, it's something he is so passionate about and loves with every breath he takes (like you) and he refuses to compromise one love for the other.

✗ ooooh he likes arcade dates a well! He thrives in a competitive environment. If you're not competitive and don't want to compete against him then he’ll compete for you - against the machines lol. Of course you play as well! But i doubt youre as competitive as this blueberry, and if you are - well i guess at the end of the day youll both be stacked in tokens 🤠

✗ Sugawara my beloved <33

✗ He. Is. So. Affectionate!

✗ Mans loves skin on skin contact ykwim?

✗ He is down for pda and does not care what others think - only what you think <3.

✗ I mean he might make out with you in public if you ask nicely

✗ Dates are very fun with him, he’ll take you to cafes, to amusement parks, to carnivals, to movies and all the like. He’s a cliche lover and he’s proud of it.

✗ Your first kiss happened on New Years Eve/Day. The two of you sat on the roof of his house and watched as the fireworks lit up the starry sky of Miyagi and chanted the count down together. The second ‘one’ left your lips he grabbed your face (softly!!) and pulled you in to crash his lips against yours.

✗ Suga loves to cuddle, preferably face to face because he just thinks you're the most beautiful person in the world.

✗ He is not the most jealous person, he definitely does get jealous but never of strangers. It's more when his close friends or your close friends get a bit too comfortable if that makes sense? He normally plays it off with humour and messes around because he acknowledges that he is insecure and that it is most likely him thinking of the worst case scenario; however if he really does start to worry and get jealous then he will sit you down and talk about it with you. To him, communication is key.

✗ Ngl Kenma is definitely in my top 3 favourites.

✗ I may or may not be a Kenma kinnie 😳🙈

✗ i love my non-toxic gamer boy <33 anywho: no matter what ANYONE says, kenma is definitely affectionate. In fact I'd say he’s one of the most affectionate boyfriends. As we all know, he is shy and introverted but he likes to hang around and spend time with people he likes. He also talks a lot to them. So I hc that he’s a bit of a chatterbox with you and it makes him really happy when you let him talk about a game or a theory he has. He’s a great listener so you can count on him to pay attention to what you say.

✗ if you didn't already have one, he bought you a switch. He loves video game dates especially when he can't see you in person (*cough* lockdown *cough*)

✗ he loves when you sit on his lap when he plays video games. I know everyone talks about sitting on their partner’s lap as some sexual thing and yeah that can happen but most of the time he’s really soft with you and just enjoys being close to you. Loves when you cuddle into him while he plays so that he can place his head on yours or your shoulder.

✗ i think he is a bit shy when it comes to kisses but definitely warms up after a while. He absolutely refuses to sleep if he doesnt get your goodnight kisses. He loves to kiss you on your nose and your cheeks the most. He loves when you kiss him on the forehead and the nose <3

✗ kenma is not one for pda, it's just not his vibe. He prefers intimacy and privacy; his relationship is not a movie for the world to watch and gawk at. Especially timeskip!kenma. Though that does not mean he wont ever show you skinship in public, occasionally he will softly hold your hand and maybe press a light kiss to your cheek.

✗ in terms of jealousy, he is moderate. Kenma, as we all know, has incredible people reading skills, so he understands the situation pretty clearly and knows when you’re uncomfortable/what you think of the situation. Most of the time you can deal with the unwanted attention and he doesnt get jealous, but he does get insecure. He shows this by going quiet and looking away when you look at him, you can cure this by giving him hugs when you get home.

✗ Akaashi my beloved <3 he’s so pretty i can't even-

✗ ugh! Just imagine him in a dark/light academia aesthetic.

✗ perfection.

✗ akaashi is the sweetest most attentive boyfriend, he loves you to pieces and never fails to let you know. He tells you he loves you every morning and every night. He probably makes meals for you and leaves notes in that have a sweet comment like “i love you, you're the best <3”

✗ he love back hugging you BUT also receiving back hugs 🥺✨

✗ akaashi is a booknerd and an introvert. Please cuddle up to him and let him read his book to you.

✗ there are only 2 things that can restore his social battery: sleeping and you.

✗ which means he wants cuddles when he’s tired 😊

✗ he is not jealous. He just doesn't get jealous, maybe annoyed if the third party is being a bit too pushy and you're clearly uncomfortable, but he just never feels jealous. No matter how hard you may try to make him jealous (plz dont cause that's kinda toxic imo) he just won't feel that way.

✗ definitely the ‘mom/dad’ as he carries sinister, pads, bandaids → a whole first aid kit basically, everywhere. Bb must be prepared.

✗ dates are so sweet with him, cute niche cafes and dimly lit libraries. Maybe the occasional abandoned building. He loves spending time with you, so really he's happiest whenever he’s with you; having coffee at McDonalds or a niche cafe won't change anything.

✗ he’s hard to pinpoint for pda. I feel like he’s indifferent about it. He probably prefers to keep it indoors or to just small and sweet gestures (no making out in public sorry-). It definitely comes down to your preferences, if you don't like it then he won't and vice versa.

✗ semi semi semi semi semi semi

✗ omg mr musician

✗ he definitely plays guitar - lead guitar and bass guitar.

✗ skilled fingies for sure 😗

✗ boy why are musicians so hot???? 😫😫😫💦💦

✗ he writes songs about you. Semsem has a bit of trouble saying exactly how he feels, so he writes it and sings it to you with a small little smile and eyes full of love.

✗ off topic but Semu has the best music taste in haikyuu

✗ he loves hugs so much <33 please hug and cuddle with him 24/7

✗ very affectionate, he’s always touching you someway. Loves kissing your forehead.

✗ he is jealous. Yeah definitely. He writes songs about being jealous 🗿 not that you mind of course ‘cause they're bangers. I think he might get snappy when he’s jealous, not directly at you but at the other person. He definitely gets a bit bitchy. Sometimes he acts that way to you so you've just gotta slap some sense into him. Say something like “what's your problem?” or “tell me what your problem is so i can help fix it.” ← that's probably the best thing to say.

✗ afterwards he’ll just snuggle with you until he feels better.

✗ he asks for your opinion about his songs all the time, please be honest (but also praise them if you like them lol)

✗ he takes you to niche spots he finds, like hidden concerts and stuff. Loves when you come to his gigs <3 oh and when you scream for him (in more ways than one).

✗ dates are cute and fun. Mostly walking around together → carnivals, main street, farmers market. Those kind of things.

✗ when it comes to pda he loves it. Loves being able to show the world who his s/o is. If you don't like it then he will tone it down and only do what you’re comfortable with. If you're also into pda then he will happily make out with you anywhere (you're one of THOSE couples 🤢 /j)

✗ all round best boyfie <3

✗ oikawa 😳 have i told y'all how much i love him? Oikawa is the best written character, no cap, he is so complex and real it's crazy. It's so fun to write about him because you can pick him apart, you know his flaws, his weaknesses, his nightmares but also his strengths and dreams. Anywho i'll stop ranting now but i just love writing for such a perfectly imperfect character-

✗ he puts up a cocky exterior but thats all false. He's as scared as you are, he's scared that you'll leave him like his exes because of how obsessed and focused he is on volleyball. However he is a changed man, he's learned to balance his priorities. If you ever feel like you're being sidelined please communicate with him.

✗ he values communication above all else and wants nothing more in a partner than for them to also value communication.

✗ back to the point → if you feel insecure of your relationship and that volleyball is taking too much of his attention let him know. He will change that. To an extent → he may have an important game coming up which is why he is focusing more, but he will always find time for you.

✗ he never forgets to text you good morning and good night. He also sends you wholesome memes and makes sure you're taking care of yourself - they're like reminders for him to also take care of himself.

✗ he is both jealous and insecure. Everyone who gets too close to you or spends a lot of time with you, he is jealous of. Jealous because he wishes he could spend more time with you but he knows he can't - not without jeopardising his volleyball career. He's also insecure, because he knows you could just leave him for a more fulfilling, more attentive, more balanced relationship. You know that too, I mean, of course you could leave him but no one would be as good as him. No one could match up to your beautifully flawed boyfriend.

✗ he is affectionate, very, very affectionate. He loves you so much. And because he spends so much time on volleyball, anytime with you he's touching you - memorizing every dint, every curve, everything about you so that he won't ever forget.

✗ Oikawa has trouble sleeping unless he's with you, he wants to sling to you in his sleep and be grounded and remember that he is loved and cherished and appreciated y'know?

✗ pda is not an issue for him. He doesn't care what anyone else says or thinks :P in this relationship the only opinions that matter are his and your’s. Tell him you're uncomfortable with something and he won't do it, and vice versa. But otherwise, like Semi, he won't mind having a good makeout session with you in the middle of the street ;)

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