#steve harrington x exgirlfriend reader | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

jjwantsme · 1 year

Text

Dear Billy,

s.h

Pairing: steve harrington x mayfield!exgirlfriend!reader

Summary: y/n never had an easy life- and vecna certainly has no intention to make it any easier.

Warning: basically the reader goes through everything in ep4 instead of max, i changed a few details, max doesnt exist in this!!, wayyyy too long, not proof read, cussing, mentions of death, mentions of trauma, mentions of suicidal thoughts, angsty angst angst!!!,sad steeb, depressed reader, lmk if im missing anything!!!

authors note: i rlly love this :,) lmk if ud like a part 2. I was rewatching season4 and this idea hit me like a fucking truck. Also sorry if this is ass😭

masterlist

Nancy and Robin ran into the closed high school, quickly making their way to the counselor office steve mentioned.

They didn’t know exactly what was going on, or how to fix it, but they knew y/n was in trouble; and that was enough to make them worry.

Y/n had been Robin’s best friend for years now, she was the first person to know her sexuality and the first person to validate her identity as whole. Knowing she could be in danger made Robin’s hands shake, and it wasn’t a feeling she could get used to.

“It was here. Right here!” Y/n testified to the friend group as they stared at a brick wall, trying to imagine what she might have seen. “A grandfather clock?” Nancy raised her eyebrows at the girl, her tone indicating that she was having some trouble believing the story.

Y/n and nancy had a…complicated friendship- if you could even call it that. Both of them being ex-lovers of steve definitely rose tension between them, unspoken tension, which happened to be the worst possible kind. Y/n hoped that maybe things would change after she left steve, maybe nancy would stop side-eyeing her in class and purposely ignoring her when the group met up. But, same as always, there was no truce. What more could she possibly want?

“it was so real,” y/n’s voice shook, “and then when i got closer, suddenly it just-…i woke up.”

“It was like she was in a…trance, or something.” Dustin cut in, “Exactly what Eddie said happened to Chrissy.”

Steve stayed quiet, just looking at the back of y/n’s head. He met her in the fall of ‘84, much to dustin’s assistance. He introduced the two of them when they needed her help creatinf a trap, and he swears he could immediately see the hearts in ole’ steve’s eyes.

Y/n, on the other hand, didn’t give in as quickly. She came from a broken home, didn’t trust people as easily. It wasn’t until Christmas that she let him have her number. And it wasn’t until all the way in spring of ‘85 when she finally let the poor boy be her boyfriend.

Even when they broke up, steve still cared way too much for her- and he would do anything to prove it…even if it meant having to kick vecna’s ass.

“Okay, be honest, uh,” Steve sighed, “do you guys understand any of this?”

Him, Dustin, and Lucas had been studying old articles for hours now, desperately trying to find clues on how to avoid y/n becoming the next victim.

Steve would be lying if he said this was his ideal morning routine, but, it was worth it to save his girl.

“No.” Lucas exasperated, obviously exhausted.

“Pretty straightforward.” Dustin shrugged.

Steve scoffed, “Oh, straightforward? Really?”

“Well, what’s confusing to you?” The younger boy sat up, “So far, everyone vecna has cursed has died- except for this old Victor Creel dude that Nancy found. He’s the only known survivor! If anyone knows how to beat this curse, it’s him!”

“Okay, yeah well that’s assuming he was cursed, Henderson, which we don’t even know. How can vecna have existed in the ‘50s? It doesn’t make sense.” Steve rubbed forehead in distress.

Dustin looked at him like he was an idiot, which wasn’t too far from the truth, “Far as we know, Eleven didn’t create the upside down- she opened a gate to it.”

Steve looked at him now, starting to piece the puzzle together.

“The upside down has probably been around for thousands of years!”

Steve just shook his head, sitting in a chair as he was too emotionally and psychically exhausted to have a scientific debate with Dustin Henderson.

Dustin leaned over a little to get a better look at y/n, before looking over at the other two boys, “any idea what she’s writing?”

Steve turned around to get a better look at her.

“Did she sleep?”

“I mean…would you?”

Steve looked down before turning back around, looking down at the newspaper and pretending to flip through the pages just to distract himself.

He felt useless. His angel was going to die. His angel would be taking her last breaths, and he had absolutely no idea how to stop it. Hell, he didn’t even know if it was possible to stop it!

He promised her he’d her safe when they were dating, and he swore to keep that promise even after they broke up. But now that promise was slowly being broken into pieces, and no matter what steve did, he couldn’t put them back together.

Y/n quickly finished the sentence she was writing, before pausing her movements as she felt glares on her. “I know you guys are staring at me.”

“What, sorry?”

“You said you needed something?”

“Just hanging out.” Steve fiddled with a tennis ball in his hands

Y/n sighed, collecting all of her letters, “How you think your eyes boring into the back of my head is protecting me from vecna? I don’t know.”

Y/n stood up and walked towards them as she shuffled the envelopes, her eyes shifting towards them when she noticed they were still dilly-dallying. “You can look at me now.”

“Thank you, sorry.”

“Sorry.”

“For you,” she handed an envelope to dustin.

“For you,” she handed another to lucas.

“And, um…you.” She handed one more to steve, trying her best not to meet his eyes., “Oh, and uhm, gives these to mike, el, and will- if you can ever get ahold of them again.”

Her eyes went wide as she watched dustin begin to open his, “hey, no, what are you doing?! No, don’t- that’s not for now, don’t open it now!”

Dustin slowly nodded, “Okay…i’m sorry, what is this?”

“It’s um…it’s a fail safe. Y’know, for after…if things don’t work out.” Y/n sniffled as she explained.

Steve immediately shook his head, placing his gifted envelope on the coffee table, “wait, woah. Y/n…things are gonna work out,”

“No.” She cut him off, “No, okay, i don’t need you to reassure me right now and tell me that it’s all gonna work out, because people have been telling me that my entire life and it’s almost never true. It’s never true!

Steve deflated into his seat, feeling like another part of the promise had just been broken off in front of him.

“I mean, of course this asshole curses me.” She looked at steve then back at the floor, “I should’ve seen that one coming.”

Steve couldn’t help but feel like her little rant was directed more towards him than anyone else. He was the one who told her that everything would be okay, that billy would be saved and their family would stay secure. He didn’t even know it, but he had lied to her.

It wasn’t too long after that when she broke up with him. It was too much- the grief, the depression, watching her step-dad leave them with nothing. Her life was falling apart, and even steve couldn’t fix that.

Steve was never cold to her, even after everything was said and done. He still tried to say hey to her when he they ran in to each other on the street, invite her to basketball games when he knew robin would be there. She turned him down though. Every single time. But he didn’t really care.

He couldn’t give up on her. He just couldn’t.

Y/n looked at the walkie-talkie and picked it up, “hey, if we go to East Hawkins will this still pick up Pennhurst?”

“Yeah, of course.”

Steve shook his head, “wait, why are we talking about East Hawkins?”

Y/n moved her eyes to him.

“No.”

She ignored his decline and started trotting up the stairs. Steve groaned and followed after her, the boys not far behind him.

“Y/n! Y/n, seriously, i’m not joking, okay? I’m not driving you anywhere!”

She just huffed in reply, “Steve, if you think i’m going to spend what is likely the last day of my life in the armpit that is Nancy Wheeler’s basement, then you’re out of your mind.”

They followed y/n all the way outside and to steve’s car- and by this point it was evident that she won the argument.

She went to open the door but frowned when she discovered that it was locked shut. She turned to her ex-boyfriend, “Open the door.”

“Uh, no.”

“Please, steve.”

Steve looked at her for a second. Those eyes. Those goddamn doe eyes. Lord, he gives in every time.

He sighed and unlocked the car before getting in, “Henderson, that little super-walkie of yours, better reach Pennhurst.”

Steve stopped his car at the graveyard, as y/n requested, and she wasted no time getting out of the car.

“Y/n!” Steve got out to chase after her.

“Steve, please, just stay in the car!”

“Y/n, just wait,” he caught up to her, “just listen to me, just, please!”

Y/n stayed in her place and looked at him, indicating that he was allowed to speak.

“I…I know you’ve something happened back there with your mother…was it vecna?”

Y/n sighed and looked away. He was right. It was vecna. And it wasn’t a very pleasant visit, either.

“I told you, i’m fine. Okay? I mean, as fine as someone who’s hurtling towards a gruesome death can be.”

“Y/n…” he grabbed her hand, “you know you can talk to me, right?”

“Yeah, sure, i know that.”

“Okay, then why do you keep pushing me away? Y/n, I love you,”

Y/n shook her head, “Stop saying that.”

“I do, y/n, I do love you! I don’t need a letter- I don’t want a letter, just talk to me. To your friends. We’re right here…” he paused and sighed, intertwining their fingers, “I’m right here. Okay? I’m here.”

Y/n let a tear slide down her cheek and looked back into his eyes, “Just…wait in the car, this won’t be long.”

Steve felt another piece break as she let go of his hand and continued walking in the other direction, leaving him behind.

Y/n sat cross-legged in-front of her older brother’s grave, and opened his envelope as more chilling tears flowed down her cheeks.

“Dear billy,” she took a deep breath.

“I don’t know if you can even hear this. Two years ago i would’ve said ‘That’s ridiculous, impossible’- but that’s before I found out about alternate dimensions and monsters, so I’m just going to stop assuming that i know anything. So much has happened since you left. Your dad was a total mess. He and my mom started getting into fights…b-bad fights. I don’t think he could stand being here without you, so he left. And he didn’t leave mom much. She’s taken an extra job, and we moved to that lovely trailer off Kerley. I broke up with Steve, and started avoiding him like the plague. Basically, ever since you left, everything’s been a…total disaster. And the worst part is, I can’t tell anyone why you’re gone. I play the moment you died back in my head all the time, and sometimes I imagine myself running to you and pulling you away.” She took a breath to wipe away her tears with her sleeve.

“I imagine that if i had, you would still be here, and everything would be…” she let out a sob, “everything would be right again. We would’ve become friends- good friends, like a real brother and sister. I would still be with steve and y’all would become close, and you would be his best man at our wedding. And I know that’s stupid. You hated me, I hated you. But I thought that maybe…maybe we could try again. But that’s not what happened. I just stood there and I watched.”

She let out another sob, “For a while, i tried to be happy, normal. But I…I think that maybe a part of me died that day too- and i haven’t told anyone this, not even steve. I-I just can’t. But I had to tell you, before it’s too late. If you can even hear this. I really hope that you can. I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry, Billy. Love, your annoying shitty little sister, Y/n.”

She began putting the envelope back, when suddenly she saw dark cloud crowd above her and a wicked chuckle, wind blowing through her hair.

“Y/n.”

Steve impatiently tapped his finger against his car door before checking his watch and getting up, “Alright, it’d been long enough,”

“Steve, just give her some time,”

“I have, alright, Sinclair?! I’m calling it, if she wants to yell at me, she can.”

Steve jogged towards where he saw her sitting, “Y/n! Time to giddy-up, yeah?”

His breath shook when he noticed how she didn’t move an inch, “Y/n…”

He felt tears in his eyes and shook her shoulder when he saw her eyes white-out, “Y/n, y/n!”

“I’ve been waiting to hear those words, y/n. Waiting so very long.”

Y/n gulped as she watched her deceased older brother walk towards her, “But it wasn’t the full truth, was it, y/n?”

He wiped a tear from her cheek, “Y’know, I think there’s a part of you, buried somewhere deep, that wanted me to die that day. You were maybe even relieved, happy.”

“B-Billy, no, that’s not true,”

“That’s why you stood there, isn’t it, y/n?” He tilted his head, “It’s okay, you can admit it now. No more lies. No more hiding.”

“Billy, that’s not true, I swear, I swear it’s not true,” She kept shaking her head.

“That is why you feel such guilt, why you hide from steve, from your friends, from the world- and why, late at night, you have sometimes wished to follow me. To follow me into death. That is why I am here, max. To end your suffering, once and for all.”

“No!” Y/n cried, breathing heavily as she ran the other way, as fast as she could.

She didn’t get very far, though, as she felt something wrap around her ankle and pull her towards an evil being, one that she assumed was vecna himself.

“Shit!”

It pulled her until cornering her onto a pillard, wrapping around her arms and legs until she couldn’t move.

Suddenly, she felt confusion as she heard her favorite song fill her ears.

She looked in the distsnce and saw the boys, yelling at her to come down.

“They can’t help you, y/n,” vecna’s deep voice startled her, “there’s a reason you hide from him, a reason you left him. You don’t belong with him. You belong here with me.”

“You’re not really here,” y/n struggled to rasp out, her throat closing due to the pressure around it.

“Oh, but I am, y/n. I am.” He rested her hand above her face.

She let out a cry as her life began flashing before her eyes.

Moving to Hawkins.

Meeting dustin and lucas at the skatepark.

Meeting steve.

Teaching eleven how to braid hair

Her first kiss with steve, in the front seat of his car.

Steve asking her out, sealing their relationship with a kiss.

Steve holding her while she cried, kissing her head.

Y/n processed it all as she noticed her left arm being freed, and she didn’t think twice before ripping out one of his tentacles, making him wince and let go of her.

She let out a breath and quickly got up to run, going as fast as she could as she tried her best to avoid obstacles as she headed towards the hole where she could see Steve and the boys.

She didn’t think she would make it.

But then, she was back, she opened her eyes and she was back in Steve’s arms.

“Y/n!”

“Y/n, oh my god!”

Steve wrapped his arms around her tightly as they both panted, “I thought we lost you, I thought I lost you.”

“I’m still here!” Y/n cried out in between breaths, grabbing one of his hands, “I’m still here.”

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