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wannab-urs · 1 month

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Scandal

Pairing: Dieter Bravo x f!reader

Prompt: Forced Proximity + “You’re going to get us arrested” / “I always wanted to see you in handcuffs.”

Summary: You get locked in a closet with Dieter at the Oscars

Warnings: semi public smut; forced proximity; reader has hair that can have bobby pins in it, is able bodied, is wearing a dress, and is an actress; the barest hint of enemies to lovers, but not really. WC: 1.6k

A/N: Written for a Dieter Bravo Brainrot Server event. Thanks to @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin, @atinylittlepain, and @pr0ximamidnight for reading it for me <3

Dieter Bravo Masterlist | Main Masterlist | AO3 | Kofi

You just need to take a breather, that’s all. The Oscars can be a lot for an actress with social anxiety – there’s a million directors, former costars, and producers all vying for a conversation with you, not to mention the cameras catching you from every angle. And to make matters worse, they’ve allowed paparazzi into the lobby this year.

There’s a coat closet just down this hallway, if you can just remember which door it is. You walk down the ornate hallway and find a door cracked open just slightly, the smell of weed emanating from the gap. You push the door open and step in, closing it tightly behind you. And you should have known from the smell alone who you’d find on the other side.

None other than Dieter Bravo.

“Shouldn’t have closed the door.”

“And you shouldn’t be smoking in here. You’re stinking up everyone’s coats.”

“No, you really shouldn’t have closed the door. We’re locked in now.”

“What?” Your voice hits a high frequency. You do not want to be locked in a closet with this particular former costar. You try the door anyway and find that he’s telling the truth.

“I told you.”

“Fuck, Dieter. You could have warned me!”

He chooses not to respond, taking another hit of his joint instead. He holds his hand out in offering, but you shake your head. Being high and trapped sounds like a recipe for paranoid disaster.

You slump to the floor, pouting, but grateful they gave you a dress you can actually move around in this year. Dieter sits cross legged across the closet from you. There are coats lining either side of the walls.

His usually fluffy curls are slicked back and styled to perfection. His nasty green bathrobe and pajama pants have been replaced by a billowing white shirt and fitted black pants. He’s even wearing real shoes. He looks… good. And he’s surprisingly clear eyed for someone smoking an entire joint.

“You look nice,” Dieter comments. You look down at your dress – the color was chosen specifically to contrast well with your skin tone. The cut shows just enough bust and highlights your body shape. It’s a good dress.

“Thanks, Dee. I was just thinking the same about you.”

“Oh were you now?”

You roll your eyes. “Not like that, Dieter. You just clean up nice, is all.”

“I’m not um…” he trails off.

“Not on coke anymore? I can tell.”

You and Dieter had worked on a project together a couple years ago. It was in the height of his coke addiction and working with him had been an absolute nightmare. He’d show up for work absolutely out of his mind, having screaming matches with the director, the producers, you. And that was if he showed up at all. The project had never even made it to production, leaving you worried your career was ruined. You fucking hated Dieter Bravo.

But you could never deny how adorable he is.

“Yeah. Cleaned up. Went to rehab. The whole shebang.”

“That’s good, Dee. Really.”

You let your head fall back against the door, exposing the line of your throat to possibly the world's horniest man.

“You look really good in that dress.”

“I’m not going to have sex with you.”

You peek an eye open and see Dieter is already halfway across the floor, crawling to you on his hands and knees. He’s pouting at you.

“What else do we have to do right now?”

You sigh and try the door one more time for good measure, reaching up behind you and tugging on the door handle. Still locked tight. Dieter grins and crawls even closer, settling between your thighs. He reaches out and strokes his thumb across your cheek. You can’t help but lean into it.

“Always thought you were so beautiful.”

“Sure, Dee,” you scoff

“I did. I do. Can I kiss you?”

“Sure, Dee,” you whisper breathlessly.

He presses his lips to yours gently at first. His lips are soft and plush against yours and you can’t help but deepen the kiss. You open your mouth and his tongue meets yours, hot and wet. Arousal sweeps through you and you bury your hands in his gorgeous curls, holding him against you. He wraps his arms around you and pulls you into his lap. You gasp, causing the kiss to break as your core comes into contact with the hard line of his cock in his trousers.

“So fucking beautiful,” Dieter mutters into your throat, pressing kisses down into your cleavage.

He lays you flat on the floor and scoots back, settling on his belly in between your thighs and rucking your dress up to your hips.

“Dieter, you’re going to get us arrested for public indecency.”

“First of all, I’ve always wanted to see you in handcuffs,” he presses a kiss to your left thigh. “And secondly, I don’t see anyone here to catch us,” he kisses your right thigh, higher up this time.

He hooks his thumb in the gusset of your panties, stroking your already soaked folds. You moan as quietly as you can.

“So wet for me, already.”

You groan as he pulls your panties to the side and buries his face in your cunt. There’s no build up, he eats you like he’s ravenous, like he hasn’t eaten in days. His curved nose grinds into your clit as he laps at your hole. His tongue plunges inside you over and over and you can already feel your core tightening. He slips two fingers in to replace his tongue, drawing circles on your clit with the point of it now. You cry out, much louder than you mean to be, than you need to be. His left hand comes up to cover your mouth, his face now hovering above yours as he curls his fingers perfectly inside you.

“Quiet now, love. Wouldn’t want to get arrested for public indecency.”

The bastard. He thrusts his fingers into you a few more times and you’re coming all over his hand. You bite down on his palm to keep from screaming. He draws his fingers out of you slowly and rights your panties for you. He sucks your come off his fingers like it’s cake batter, letting out a little moan of his own at the taste.

The door handle jiggles and you both freeze. Just as the lock turns, Dieter grabs you and rolls you both under the lowest level of coats on the side of the closet. You’re on top of him, breathing heavily into his neck. Someone comes in, grabs their coat, and leaves the room, pulling the door closed behind them.

Dieter goes to roll you both back out but you stop him. You press a kiss to his very exposed throat.

“I love this shirt. Very Mr. Darcy.”

“It is romantic isn’t it?”

You drag your lips down his throat to his chest, pressing a kiss to the lowest bit of exposed skin. Your hands find the clasp on his fancy black pants, but you can’t quite get them open.

“The one time you don’t wear easy access pants…”

“Here, let me.”

You both fumble for a moment before the clasp finally comes open and his cock springs out.

“No underwear?”

“The lines were showing too bad.”

“Mmhmm,” you quirk an eyebrow at him.

You wrap his cock in your hand. It’s long, curved a little, and not terribly thick.

“Pretty,” you mutter before taking the tip in your mouth. He gasps as you suck him down. You swirl your tongue around his head, then flatten it out and let him fill your mouth. He hits the back of your throat and you suppress a cough, pushing him further down. His hands flutter into your hair as you start bobbing your head, sucking him down over and over again. He doesn’t push or pull you, simply rests his hands on the back of your head.

You pull off him and lick a stripe up the seam of his balls as you stroke his cock. You suck one into your mouth, rolling it gently on your tongue, then switch to the other.

“I’m gonna–”

You take his cock down your throat again, wanting to swallow his cum. You suck hard on the tip and then drop your lips down to the base as he comes in your mouth. His hips stutter beneath you and he groans.

You let his softening cock fall out of your mouth and press a kiss to his hip bone. He strokes the back of your head reverently.

“We should get cleaned up,” you whisper, your voice rough.

Dieter sighs, but helps you get back to your feet. You take in his rumpled appearance and know you can’t look much better. His chest is covered in lipstick, as is his face. His hair is an absolute mess. His outfit is askew and wrinkled to hell.

You help him fix his outfit, rub the lipstick off his skin, and finger comb his hair back into some semblance of a style. He pulls bobby pins out of your hair and stows them in his pockets, letting your hair down from the hours of work the stylist did. He smooths out your dress as best as he can.

“We look…”

“Like we just fucked on the floor of a closet?”

“Yeah.”

He takes a bobby pin from his pocket and picks the lock on the door.

“You could have done that the whole time?”

Dieter doesn’t answer. He stands and takes your hand in his and pulls the door open. You’re immediately inundated with camera flashes. The paparazzi have found you. Your agent is going to kill you.

“I fucking hate you,” you halfheartedly fuss at Dieter. This scandal will be fun to deal with...

#Dieter Bravo #Dieter Bravo fics #Dieter Bravo fanfiction #Dieter Bravo x reader #Dieter Bravo x you #The Bubble fanfiction #pedro pascal #pedro pascal character fanfiction #ppcu fanfiction #pedro pascal fanfiction #dieter bravo x f!reader

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tismrot · 5 months

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ARE YOU A CROWLEY? Hello, how are ya? Let’s be friends.

I, too, started out as a loud, emotional child who was into ✨SPACE✨. I’d ask questions wherever I went - some adults found it endearing that a four-year-old asked the types of why’s they didn’t have answers for, others asked me to shut up, be quiet. I realize as an adult I asked a lot of uncomfortable questions, having no idea i shouldn’t.

Home life was turbulent. My dad had the same issues as me, probably, but his generation never talks about anything, and he became an unpredictable, emotionally distant and sometimes explosive presence. The words he used to call me still hurt, way more so than any bruise he left. Mom smoked cigarettes in the kitchen, reading difficult books instead of daring to look at the difficult lives we all had. It was the 90s, after all. Nobody ever did anything about problems.

I should have been sent to some sort of screening, of course. But I was a girl, and hyperlexic. Diagnoses were for boys who couldn’t spell their own names, who threw chairs at teachers and brought knives to school.

My anger issues and social naivety, as well as unconventional intensity of interests, alienated me from my peers. I usually played alone, even though I was extremely extroverted. I was bullied relentlessly until I moved away for high school. There, I was only shut out, I didn’t have anyone yell things after me anymore. It was a freedom.

All my friends, from early childhood until now, have been the other misfit freaks. Some of us were extremely damaged, but all of us had baggage. I’m only friends with a few of them still, we all had dramatic lives and quite many of them are now dead, in self-imposed isolation or have managed to turn their lives completely around (which means they cut out me). Self-imposed isolation became my way of dealing with my past, and I’ve cut out a lot of people. I don’t judge anyone for deciding I wasn’t the friend they needed. I’ve done dumb things, I’ve made bad choices.

I was extremely extroverted, happy (despite the anger), motivated and creative. After family, school and life happened, I became a socially paranoid, bitter, arrogant mess. I said I hated people - the truth was that I suspected they all hated me. I self-medicated with (almost) everything I could get my hands on (but I preferred stimulants), until I got stimulant prescription medications - I’ve stopped doing everything else and life is very predictable. I’m healthy and reliable, I can talk about weather with strangers on bus stops, I don’t always say the weirdest thing one could say in any given situation (and realize only two days later). I work out to stabilize my hEDS (the connective tissue disorder that made me walk funny, sit funny, move in strange ways, made everything hurt all the time), I read up on traumatic family dynamics.

Would be boring if I didn’t still vividly remember where I’ve been before.

So. Seeing Crowley on screen actually DID something to me. I know, fatal brainrot, but I see myself in him. Whatever he does in the show, I get it. I see parallels to my personality, my neurodivergencies and my trauma. It feels affirming and I feel represented in a way I didn’t know I needed. I mean, it’s almost uncanny/silly - I, too, wear only black, have a thing for snake themed jewelry (for years, not related to Good Omens at all) and I almost always wear sunglasses (light sensitivity). It’s dumb, almost, but it’s true. I dressed up as him recently and only had to buy the lenses - all the rest, including the sleeveless turtleneck body, was already in my closet.

(Oh, and ✨Flex Time✨, kids absolutely dig me. They climb on me and tell me beautiful and horrendous things from their lives without apprehension, and adults often don’t like that. I talk to them like I’m a kid myself, I don’t try to be above them. I work with kids now, and the other adults always send me the stink eye, but the kids apparently need to talk and I hope I’m making a positive impact in their lives.)

And the best part? Via Tumblr I’ve learned that my experience isn’t unique. So many of us see ourselves in Crowley, for these exact reasons. I love that about us!

So. Are you a Crowley? Let me know. Add me. Let’s be a group of the all of us.

(GIF: Accurate depiction of me watching Crowley In The Beginning, him not understanding how questions could be dangerous - then remembering how many teachers absolutely hated my precocious, arrogant, eight-year-old ass for always raising my hand to ask something that would reveal how little the teacher actually knew, and I had no idea that was what was happening until I tried to be a teacher myself and actually ENJOYED having kids ask me weird questions).

#crowley #good omens fandom #ineffable husbands #aziraphale x crowley #good omens 2 #crowley x aziraphale #ineffable spouses #innefable husbands #ineffable divorce #crowley edits #female crowley #crowley brainrot #good omens brainrot #audhd problems #actually audhd #aj crowley #crowley good omens #anthony j crowley

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kyleoreillylover · 3 months

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Always Take Care of You

Sami Zayn x Fem!Black!Reader x Kevin Owens

After a pretty dull weekend (Nothing too special, just you, Kevin and Sami main-eventing WrestleMania, no big deal), your boys want to take care of you.

Word count: 2,303

tagged: @southerngirl41 @venusesworld @jeysbae @reci1996 @tbonesteakwithasideofmashngrav @hope4more @selena-tyler-564 @saintaquarius @whatdoeseverybodywant @raya-hunter01 @afterdarkprincess

A/N: Zowens brainrot at the moment. That's it. This can be read as platonic or romantic, it is up to you! inspired by a zowens fanfic I read<3

Everything felt like too much yet not enough at the same time. The flashing lights of the cameras were blinding, the cacophony of voices echoing throughout Wrestlemania weekend like a relentless drumbeat.

But none of those could compare to the electricity that surged through your veins as you walked inside your hotel room, Kevin and Sami following behind you, your new Raw Women's Championship shimmering in your hands.

"I've never went inside her hotel room, we're best friends but there are some things that are just sacred," Kevin joked to an interviewer earlier that day, and you had nudged him with a smile, knowing that his jest was a cover for the genuine bond you shared. But he would follow you anywhere if it meant he could share in your success.

And as you carefully set all your titles onto the richly furnished dresser (now 5!!), your boys watched the glimmer in your eyes as the you stared at your Raw Women's Championship. The golden plate reflected the ambient glow of the room, and your face seemed to glow as well, and Sami and Kevin's hearts swelled with pride.

You had done the same with them yesterday when you had stood by them when they won the Tag Titles from Jimmy and Jey the previous night, cheering them on with unwavering support. Now, it was your moment, your time to revel in the glory you had rightfully earned.

"We did this." You whispered.

"You did this." Sami corrected, wrapping an arm around your shoulder. His voice was soft, but his words carried the weight of their meaning.

You turned to face them, the smile on your face widening. "No, we did this," you insisted, your eyes meeting each of theirs.

Kevin gently placed a hand on your shoulder, his blue eyes reflecting the pride and camaraderie that flowed between the three of you. "We did this, we fought for this together, and now we get to celebrate together." he said, his voice gruff with emotion. "This isn't just your victory, it's ours."

You breathed out, feeling the warmth of their friendship envelop you like a comforting blanket. "Ours."

Then you let out a giggle, and the tension that had been building up in the room suddenly dissipated, replaced by your shared laughter. It was a moment of pure joy, a moment where the pressures of the wrestling world melted away, leaving only the bonds of friendship and the thrill of victory.

"I can't believe we actually pulled it off," Sami chimed in, his voice filled with disbelief and elation.

"I can't believe Adam actually gave me the main event over Roman," Your voice was filled with awe and disbelief. "I can't believe he hates him that much that he would give me the spot over him," You chuckled, shaking your head in wonder. "I feel bad for Cody, but it ain't my fault that I'm just that good," You added with a playful smirk.

Kevin let out a hearty laugh, clapping you on the back. "You earned every bit of this spotlight, and Roman can take a backseat for once." Kevin wasn't gonna let you diminish everything you did.

Sami nodded along with a soft grin, his eyes shimmering with pride. "You've worked so hard for this moment, and no one deserves it more than you."

As the adrenaline of the victory began to subside, a sense of contentment settled over the room. For a moment, there were no rivalries, no feuds, just three friends that made their way from the Indies basking in the glow of their shared success.

"Now go shower, you stink of victory!" Kevin interrupted with a playful shove, breaking the momentary solemnity.

Typical Kevin. It seemed like he was on a sugar rush from stealing all your snickers bars from the press conference, and you knew that you were gonna have to monitor his candy intake if you wanted to get any sleep tonight.

You chuckled, swatting at him half-heartedly. "Hey, I earned this stench," you retorted, a mischievous glint in your eyes.

Sami smirked, leaning against the dresser. "Yeah, but the rest of us don't have to suffer through it," he teased, earning himself a mock glare from you.

You rolled your eyes, but the smile never left your face. "Fine, fine," you relented, giving them both a playful glare before disappearing into the bathroom, the sound of running water soon filling the room.

When you came out of the shower, a bonnet wrapped around your head and soft robe draped over your shoulders, you found Kevin and Sami sprawled out on the plush hotel bed, talking amongst themselves.

You plopped down onto the bed beside them, the softness of the mattress a welcome relief after the long day of wrestling and celebrations. You immediately cuddled into Sami, making him smile and wrap an arm around you, while Kevin made room for you with a playful shove but then he pulled you both into a tight embrace, sandwiching you between him and Sami.

"I'm tired. So, so tired." You mumbled into the cozy embrace of both men, feeling the exhaustion from the day's events finally catching up to you.

Kevin let out a sympathetic chuckle. "Well, you did just win the Raw Women's Championship in the main event of WrestleMania, I think being tired is allowed," he remarked with a teasing tone, though his eyes betrayed a genuine fondness for you.

"I thought all that chocolate you ate was supposed to give you energy," Sami added with a smirk, earning a playful smack on the arm from you.

"Kevin stole all the chocolate, remember?" you shot back, sticking out your tongue at Kevin who grinned sheepishly in response.

You winced slightly as you shifted to get more comfortable, the soreness from the match still lingering in your muscles. Sami noticed and reached over to grab a nearby pillow, gently placing it behind your back for added support.

"Better?" he asked with a warm smile.

You nodded gratefully, sinking deeper into the embrace of your friends. "Much better, thanks," you replied, feeling the tension easing from your muscles as you settled in.

"How much does it hurt?" Kevin asked, his voice soft with concern as he traced your scar.

You winced again, the memory of the stinging pain flooding back to you. "Bianca whipped her braid into my ribs, how do you think my side feels?" You answered with a playful grin, trying to lighten the mood.

"I think I blacked out when she hit me with it," You added with a chuckle, though the pain was still very real.

You leaned into Kevin's touch when he traced your scar, the warmth of his hand providing a comforting reassurance. "It's not too bad," you replied, though you couldn't deny the lingering ache in your side.

Sami's expression softened with empathy. "Well, you bruised her eye, so I'd say it's a fair trade," he quipped, trying to inject some humor into the situation.

"Yeah, because me punching her equals instant karma," you replied with a laugh, closing your eyes when Kevin and Sami chuckled, the sound a soothing melody in the quiet of the hotel room.

For a moment, the three of you simply existed in the space, the weight of the day's events mingling with the warmth of friendship. Despite the pain and exhaustion, being surrounded by Kevin and Sami made everything feel bearable.

You hummed when you felt Sami's hands gently massaging your shoulders, the tension gradually melting away under his skilled touch. "You're tired too, you don't have to—"

"I want to," Sami interrupted softly, his voice filled with sincerity. "You've carried us through so much, it's the least I can do to help you relax."

You smiled gratefully, feeling a rush of warmth spread through your chest at Sami's words. You wanted to protest, but Sami's hand working out the knots on your shoulders felt too good to resist. Instead, you let out a contented sigh, allowing yourself to fully surrender to the moment.

"Thank you." You murmured softly, your voice barely above a whisper as you leaned into Sami's touch. "Both of you, thank you."

Kevin reached over to squeeze your hand, his eyes reflecting the depth of his affection for you. "For what? You're the one that won the title tonight. You're the reason we're all here," he said sincerely, his voice warm with admiration.

You shook your head, a soft smile playing on your lips. "No, the reason we're all here is because you two bozos are the best friends a person could ask for," You said, your voice filled with genuine gratitude. "20 years of laughter, tears, victories, and defeats. You've been there for me through it all, and I wouldn't trade that for anything in the world."

Kevin chuckled, a hint of emotion in his voice. "Bozos, huh? Well, I guess we'll take that as a compliment," he replied with a playful grin, squeezing your hand in return.

Sami nodded in agreement, his eyes shining with affection. "Yeah, wouldn't want to be anyone else's bozos," he said, his voice tinged with fondness.

"I just spilled my heart out to you and the only thing you guys hear is "bozos," you finished, pretending to pout, though the playful twinkle in your eyes gave away your true feelings.

Kevin and Sami burst into laughter, the sound filling the room with warmth and light. You would never get tired of hearing the sound of their laughter and being the cause of it. You loved making them happy, being the cause of their grins and overall happiness. You just loved them in general...

"I guess we're just used to your insults by now," Kevin quipped, brining you out of your thoughts, earning himself a playful swat from you.

"You love it," you retorted with a grin, feeling a sense of contentment settle over you like a comforting blanket.Sami wrapped an arm around you, pulling you into a tight hug. "We do," he agreed, his voice filled with sincerity. "We love you, champ."

You leaned into the embrace, feeling the weight of the day's events finally catching up to you. But in that moment, surrounded by the warmth and laughter of your friends, you knew that everything was going to be okay.

"I love you both too." You mumbled into the embrace, feeling a surge of gratitude and love wash over you. It was moments like these, the quiet ones filled with shared laughter and heartfelt sentiments, that made all the struggles and sacrifices worth it.

You laid down on the bed, sandwiched between Kevin and Sami, feeling their warmth enveloping you like a protective cocoon. Sami continued to massage your shoulders, his touch gentle and soothing, while Kevin rested his head on your shoulder, his breath warm against your neck. It was a simple moment of closeness, but it was everything you needed after the whirlwind of WrestleMania weekend.

"Remind me to owe you for massaging me like this," you murmured with a contented sigh, feeling the tension in your muscles slowly dissipating under Sami's skilled touch.

Sami sighed contentedly, his fingers working magic on your shoulders. "Consider it payment for all those times you've had our backs in and out of the ring," he replied softly, his voice warm with affection.

Kevin chuckled, his breath tickling your neck. "Oh, don't worry, I'll make sure to collect on that debt if he's too nice not too," he teased, though there was a genuine warmth in his voice.

As the laughter faded into comfortable silence, you closed your eyes, allowing yourself to fully bask in the warmth and love of your friends. In that moment, surrounded by the people who had been with you through thick and thin, you felt an overwhelming sense of gratitude and peace wash over you.

WrestleMania weekend had been a whirlwind of emotions, but as you lay there with Kevin and Sami by your side, you knew that no victory or championship could ever compare to the bond you shared with them.

"Go to sleep, champ," Kevin murmured, his voice soft with affection.

"Can we get Waffle House when we wake up?" You groggily asked, earning a playful groan from Kevin and a wide smile from Sami.

"Of course we can, as long as you promise not to order everything on the menu this time," Sami replied with a laugh, his voice filled with fondness.

You grinned, feeling the exhaustion finally catching up to you as you snuggled deeper into the embrace of your friends. "I won't," you mumbled sleepily, feeling the comforting weight of sleep beginning to pull you under.

"Whatever you want. Whatever makes you happy, we'll make it happen," Kevin said softly, his voice filled with sincerity.

With those words echoing in your mind, you let yourself drift off into a peaceful slumber, surrounded by the warmth and love of your two best friends.

Sami kissed the top of your head gently, his touch light and filled with affection. "Goodnight, champ," he whispered, his voice barely above a whisper. His hands squeezed Kevin's as a silent kiss in the night as well.

Kevin followed suit, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead. "Sweet dreams," he murmured, his voice warm with love.

There had been so much noise over the past few days — press, fans, interviews, and the roar of the crowd. You cherished that, loved the connection with the fans, the love the three of you had been getting.

But in that moment, in the quiet intimacy of the hotel room, where all you could hear was the steady rhythm of your friends' breathing, a comforting lullaby that carried you into a deep and restful sleep, was what you truly wanted.

And that was worth more than any championship title or victory in the ring.

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junipersramblings · 1 year

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So apparently this is what happens when the Stars Claim Them CELLO MADE OF STARLIGHT AND A BOW OF A COMET'S TAIL brainrot really hits

From a joke about Lyfrassir having the same amount of syllables as Guinevere and Marius calling them starlight to a WHOLEASS COVER (featuring cello and violin by Musescore)

Lyrics under the read more!

Verse 1: (Marius)

Oh my love, raise a glass to all we’ve left behind

You may end up dead, and I cannot lose you yet

But if you don’t return to me, if I don’t see you again

Then tonight let’s drown our sorrows down with whiskey

Lyfrassir, you’re my stars that shine against the night

And I know you’ve got to leave me at the dawn’s first light

And I’m not saying this path you’ve chosen isn’t right

But first let’s fuel a few more sins with whiskey

Verse 2: (Lyf)

Marius, you’re a fool to drink your bottle dry

Whiskey kills your fear, and knowing you you’ll need that near

Cause I don’t know what you’re doing but it’s pro’bly dangerous

And I love you but you stink to hell of whiskey

I know I’ll sound crazy but you must believe me

I’ve been spending my years fighting ‘gainst the Entities

It’s not just the Bifrost there’s least another fourteen

But since I’m here, come on now, pass the whiskey

Verse 3: (Lyf and Marius)

Drain your glass, get ready, for we’re waking up

We must rejoin our fights, there’s no more time for respite

And I promise that I will see you again

And I’ll be here with another glass of whiskey

Maybe this is real, or maybe this is fake

But I won’t leave you too soon, I won’t make the same mistake

[BOTH]

We’re not pure of heart, but we’re sure of aim

And our heads are full of love and blood and whiskey

Verse 4: (Lyf and Marius)

There’s a dream that I’ve had, whenever I have died

Of an empty void, with music flowing like the tide

But lately it’s been quiet and I know something is wrong

So I must keep up the music, keep up the fight

I don’t understand all of this but I’ll be here

I’ll stand by your side and we’ll face our fear

But you can’t be by my side when I am in that void

Then I’ll think of you, and hold you whene’er you’re near me

#junipers ramblings #I wrote a song???#I guess????#the stars claim them

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dunnswrld · 2 years

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chris brainrot ???

Chris Pontius Headcannons!

a/n: This request is perfect cause I have been having a lot of Chris brain rot recently...

prompt: Just the title!

warnings: Fluff, very very light smut like it's not really even smut, Fem!reader, alcohol

I feel like you two met through Jackass

When you first started Jackass and met the guys Chris was head over heels

A girl who could do the same things he did and look pretty while doing it? Oh he had fallen in love with you before seeing you

But when you two had a bit together to go around as Party Boy and the newest party member, Party Girl, was when he really fell for you

It wasn't the fact you were wearing a tiny black bathing suit with a tie around your neck but just the fact you enjoyed not only making the bit with him but hanging out with him behind the cameras

Though the bathing suit was a plus

But when a creepy guy would try touching you Chris would remind him that he was still there, and he only had a thin piece of fabric to cover his present

From then on Jeff made sure you both had matching costumes and did every costume involved bit together just because of how good your guys chemistry was

It didn't shock anyone when you both started dating a year after meeting

"Yn and I are dating."

"Party boy and Party girl are finally together!" - Johnny probably

"What a shocker dude. Not like I saw that coming." - Steve-o most likely

"Wait you two weren't already dating?" - Defiantly Dave.

Speaking of the Jackass boys since you are apart of the crew you are still at fault for pranks

Though everyone stopped pranking you because Chris was always quick to throw a punch at whoever pranked you...

But when it comes to pranking Chris you are always the first to come up with the idea

"Well why can't we do that?"

"Well Yn just because Chris won't hurt you doesn't mean he won't hurt us."

I feel like you and Chris both enjoy the outdoors a lot

I think this would mean lots of picnics in the forest or walks for dates

While on one of your guys walks Chris probably finds a bug or lizard and gives you a run down on everything about it

"This is a garden stink it looks like a dark red right now because its been in the sun but they usually are brown or sometimes black, and it's cool because the lighter their color is the more energetic they are so this one isn't that energetic I'm guessing because even through the dark red it looks darker."

"How the hell do you even know this Chris?"

I feel like he would pick you flowers while you two are on walks

From dandelions to even walk into peoples yards and pick their flowers for you

He has gotten yelled at for this. Multiple times.

"Ok asshole it's not my fault you have nice flowers I think MY girlfriend would like. Maybe get a damn fence!"

You probably are his girlfriend 50% or the time and his mom the other 50%

When you aren't acting like his girlfriend you probably are yelling at him for something

"Chris put the snake down!"

"Chris stop chasing Ehren with that knife right now!"

"Chris don't go back there! There is probably poison Ivy!"

"Chris put your penis away!"

But when your his girlfriend Chris is a very good boyfriend to you

Chris isn't very big on PDA but when it's just you two or in a group of close friends he is very touchy feely

His favorite thing is you sitting on his lap so he can hug you from behind and rest his head on your back

He kisses the back of your neck while in this sitting position too

He loves when you kiss his cheeks too, it makes him blushy

Chris 100% worships you in and out of bed

I'm talking compliments all the time.

"Wow you look so hot right now."

"Those shorts make your ass look great babe."

"I love your hair, it's so pretty."

"Your smile is the best thing ever."

"You look great today- well you look great everyday."

Chris is over-protective I feel like

Not in a crazy boyfriend way but in a "she's my girlfriend and I love her more than anyone!" way.

He probably has gotten into with some of the guys for sexual comments or him swearing their eyes were looking at your boobs or ass

But when he's drunk and a guy is flirting with you at the bar...

You, Chris, and the rest of the Jackass guys are banned from some bars for Chris starting full on wars over a guy talking to you and even dare to HINT the idea of flirting

He would be very caring and understanding with you, no matter what

He would just be such a great boyfriend

Ugh I just love him :(

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witchcraftandburialdirt · 1 year

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💭 - Danny and Robin 👀

send in ‘💭’ for FIVE (OR MORE!) HEADCANONS about our muses. ((I'm going to try and stick to not just super romantic gushy ones today because I do it often bc I have brainrot. These can all work in league and DBD verse--I ENDED UP WRITING A LOT MORE THAN I INTENDED SO THE POST IS CUT BUT YEAH.

Despite everything, shockingly, Danny offers Robin one of the most domestic and steady lifestyles in terms of normalcy. Yes I know serial killer but hear me out; nice simple apartment life, they go grocery shopping, aren't heavily involved with any sort of crazy thing 90% of the time and Robin can decide if he wants to start taking jobs for a more lucrative existence. Danny, outside of his weekend endeavors, is just a man that Robin can enjoy life's simplicities with. Its a normalcy he craves due to his messed up life.

I view them as being incredibly mature with eachother when it comes to disagreements and issues as they're both extremely intelligent and innovative in terms of thinking. They very much practice "us vs the problem" rather than "me vs you" in terms of arguments. This allows them to work as a team and combine their efforts together, there's no winner or loser, just the two of them working together to solve an issue thats affecting them both.

Robin is INFP and Danny is ENTP, there's A LOT of compatibility regarding these two personality types that I think accurately reflects them both!

"ENTPs appreciate partners who can help them get in touch with their feelings because this isn’t something that comes naturally to people of this personality type. INFPs primarily look for authentic, emotional connections.ENTPs find this emotional intelligence attractive. INFPs can be underestimated, partly due to their soft and gentle nature, but ENTPs see their many layers and resilience. INFPs and ENTPs have enough similarities to form a strong connection and enough differences to create that spark. Ultimately, they find each other fascinating yet comforting."

4. I don't care they have phone sex often and sometimes play out the whole idea of home invasion and the other stuff involving Danny's usual weekend routine but make it ✨SPICY.✨ He leaves a nice camera for Robin to "find" so Danny can watch through it and give him instructions over the phone.

"Now about that video camera... I have a better idea of where to put it. Bring it to your bedroom, we can continue our little game." "Where are you..? In the bedroom?" "Haha, no. I'm close..that's all you have to know...I'm close enough to end the game if you won't play~"

Danny will even flip the breaker or have this happen in an abandoned building where they won't be disturbed, although if they are Danny will happily fix that little problem. “Sexual arousal and fear come from the same base emotion — physiological arousal,” and boy does Danny know how to toy with it. Of course though, they have a safe word but I feel like they very rarely use it.

5. I think, especially in the beginning, they were both extremely wary of the feelings they were developing due to the trauma in their lives revolving around affection. Danny doesn't care about anything or anyone except himself--and suddenly that fact isn't true anymore, I'm sure his peace of mind was shattered somewhat. Robin can play the charisma game, but when he realizes that its more than a battle of wits, his guard immediately goes up.

6. They're 100% the couple who are so chatty and bubbly with eachother but the moment someone else enters their space and ruins their dichotomy they immediately give them the stink face.

7. Drunken Karaoke. I don't make the rules. It happened. I see them both having fairly decent voices as well.

8. Outside of relationship's, Robin is extremly uninterested in a lot of things pertaining to them, but IN a relationship he does a 180. Generally non aggressive but if he sees someone encroaching on his boyfriend he's quick to go back to his old ways of bringing that person down and making sure they know to screw off. He knows Danny would never do anything, but Robin is just protective in that sense--he's also aware that Danny can protect himself--but if he can intervene, he'll do it.

9. Endless conversations. There's nothing they can't talk about. Nothing. I feel like their first phone call ended up with them realizing they'd been on the phone for 4+ hours. There's lots of times they say nothing, just enjoying being around each other. But Danny will always listen to Robin's ramblings, even if he has no idea what the hell he's talking about, just to hear his voice. And Robin extends this back to him. They both know the other is VERY intelligent.

Robin appreciates this more than he can explain, since he was always, and often, told his ideas were stupid and to shut up. Or that he spoke too much. To have someone accept him so easily..what else could he ask for?

10. Danny reads his rough drafts to Robin because he doesn't have to censor himself at all, and he doesn't have to worry about Robin insulting his work. I feel like its a really big ego/confidence booster for Danny (AS IF HE NEEDS MORE) since while he's reading he can just see Robin moving to the edge of his seat, nodding and biting the edge of his thumb while he listens. Even if its just a rough draft, unpolished and ugly, at least one person in the world thinks its amazing to hear.

11. OKAY LAST ONE: THE AMOUNT OF PETNAMES BETWEEN THESE TWO IS DISGUSTING. PLEASE YOU TWO, USE YOUR NAMES!!!

#mun speaks #5 headcanons game #bells of black sunday #i am so sorry #there is so much here #FEEL FREE TO ADD MORE THO LOL

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