#wow this is my state right now...

[cubeapples]

You do know that people can erm have different interpretation of the characters, right? What you think a character should be like doesn't mean others are wrong? People don't forget about “canon” when they ship something, they just think/interpret a character's quirk differently than you? Just because you believe they will have different reactions to things, doesn't give you the right to say others are wrong? As long as people don't totally change the personality,personality or make them ooc; it's a fair game. Like, how and why are you so high and mighty about being right? It's a fandom, everyone can love what they love; just because you ship things differently- doesn't give you the right to think that no other character aside from your fave can shine more? That's just ooc/favouritism lense to me. Which is to say, you are doing the same thing for which you are calling others out for.

ermmm yes, i do, actually. "People don't forget about “canon” when they ship something, they just think/interpret a character's quirk differently than you?" i know. and i'm not talking about these people. in case you're having trouble understanding, i've been explicitely talking about people depicting a character in a completely ooc manner by obliterating his character to just be an accessory to someone else.

"Just because you believe they will have different reactions to things, doesn't give you the right to say others are wrong?" i have never said anyone was wrong directly, so i don't know why you decided to take it so personally. and actually i do have the right to say others are wrong. in My blog. as long as i'm not leading a hate train on a single individual, i have the right to say some depictions are straight up wrong. to me. they are wrong to me. i don't care if you think they are right. they are wrong to me because i think they are ooc. i am entitled to my own opinions. if they think they are right, nothing is stopping them from blocking me. i will always stand on the hill that this fandom does "my fave" dirty, because it's true.

"just because you ship things differently- doesn't give you the right to think that no other character aside from your fave can shine more?" i have never said this. at all. i don't know where you got this from. i am actually pretty sure i have pointed out several flaws of "my fave," so... idk what you're on about.... also, it's not my fault "my fave" is a character that already canonically "shines." 🤷‍♀️

#cry about it #“my fave” SNORT just say his name lol #anyways he's my specialest little guy ❤❤ #wow what a nothingburger ask #anon are you proud that you achieved nothing by sending me this? i hope that block button looks temptinggg right about now #anon.ask #also i was hardly bashing anything i was just stating FACTS because yall like to obliterate v's character to make him a mushy simp.. which. #.. ew

[marsti]

why do people think im angry all the time 😭 im legit not an angry person and it's so frustrating that everyone acts like i am

#shut up sender #me: i am literally not angry right now #other person: wow calm down #like ok!! now im ACTUALLY angry because youre telling me to calm down when im trying to tell you my actual emotional state #and the cycle repeats again and again how do i deal with that #if people still act like this even though im constantly clarifying myself #repeating ''im not angry im not mad you didnt do anything wrong i swear im telling the truth'' like a broken record #just living my life having to constantly reassure people and nobody ever cares to ask how i actually feel 😭 #sorry just needed to vent because im at a total loss idk what to do

[that-was-anticlimactic]

no one asked bUT imma go off (affectionate) anyways. ahem:

edse (practicum): portfolio is completed, did portfolio presentation this morning, blog is updated, have all the rubrics... DONE

347: major identity essay? done. final “essay”? done. just gotta go to class tomorrow so we can meet for the final exam time slot and we are going to. talk about books. no more assignments, yay!

395: edtpa? DONE. reflection? DONE. self-evaluation for edtpa? DONE. now, all i have to do is edit edtpa and then submit it for like Official grading and not class grading

405: presentation? made and presented. revision portfolio and reflection? DONE (finished it like fifteen minutes ago lol)

444: giant research paper? DONE. reflection? done. presentation? DONE. just gotta go to the final exam period thursday to watch the rest of the presentations, but no more work for meeeeeeee

and then finally... 305... the only final i actually have left...

#y'all i worked SO HARD #i am so so so ready for a break even tho it's p short #i stayed at college for thanksgiving break so i could do homework and i got SO MUCH DONE and i spent the last two weeks like hardcore #working on finals and homework and i did SO MUCH and i'm so relieved and so proud of myself holy trash that was so much #and my 405 prof is suggesting that i submit the fiction piece i wrote somewhere iugfcgvhujijuhygfc idk where but i'm kind of 👀 #like i'm a wuss and submitting scares me a bit ngl but like. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH he thinks that i just need to make slight like wording #revisions and then it's ready to go out iuyfgdxghuijohugfcghijo imma miss that class haha #anyways just like. in a Wow state of mind right now #like... it's all finally ending and then i student teach next semester and i freaking finally am about to have a break and like... i did it? #now all i have to do is do well on my 347 papers which aren't graded yet (i: am scared/nervous haha have an a but still ahhhhhhh) #and then write my 305 and get that back... and then edit and submit edtpa and then the worst of it: WAIT AND HOPE THAT I PASS EDTPA UGH #pls pray for me to pass <3 #or send good thoughts <3 #anyways sorry for rambling i just wanted to be proud of myself okijuhygfdxfgyhujioiuhygf

[tintedglasses]

.

#okay wow I just opened the doc with the actual comments and now I’m actually crying #she basically tore my work to shreds #and like no positive feedback at all #like give me an empty platitude if you must #I’m so frustrated to continually meet with her and telll her how stressed I am #and how I’m having a really hard time #and then have her like respond in this way #like that’s not at all helpful for my mental state #I don’t even know if I should work on this right now because I would rather just cry #and not feel stupid

[em-dashes]

now that suddence is out to betas i'm oscillating between getting more and more self conscious and overthinking about everything that might be wrong with the story vs. knowing that is literally THE POINT of betas and i can't in good conscience let my story slide out into the world with a bunch of faults i didn't catch simply because i was too close to it

#em dashes #DON'T GO EASY ON ME I NEED TO KNOW EVERYTHING #i just need all my betas to know that I KNOW my story isn't perfect in its current state and that's exactly why it's out for critiques #i think there's always some part of you that wishes the critiques will come back squeaky clean. no notes! absolute perfection! #bc then you'd feel proud! you'd feel like you know what you're doing! like you're a PRO!! #however i gotta remind myself that not even professional writers can crank out perfect stories right away #they all have editors and peer critiques to help them #and i have to be careful about equating critiques as personal failures #because they aren't!! they're there to help!!! #anyway. enough venting for now #it's been a while since i got peer critiques so it's a little unnerving lol #but also also i just saw a very good breakdown of an episode of buffy that deals with grief #and i couldn't help comparing it to suddence which also deals with grief #and thinking 'wow. why didn't i do this. why didn't i do that. am i doing this all wrong' #AHH! writing is a very scary profession sometimes #but to be proud of myself for a second #i've never been so confident as to even show so many people my writing. let alone to receive critique on it #it's so strange to think there was a time where i kept all my writing bottled up and didn't talk about it to anyone even on tumblr #i began posting in 2018. that's not that long ago. that's only five years #and yet it feels like a billion years ago. i was still in university. suddence didn't even exist yet #wow. time is so weird

[freebooter4ever]

btw if anyone is watching the cold war documentary on ntflx? dont bother. lamo this is the dumbest doc i have seen in a while. it leaves out too much stuff, it presents things as true that are blatantly false if you give more information, and it states 'theories' as facts. some facts it just plain gets hilariously wrong. there is an agenda in this documentary that it isnt stating outright, that i am highly suspicious of, and i would be curious to know who is funding it.

#jrnlsht #ah i looked up the producers and now it makes sense -_- #this is a good reminder to always check documentary sources if the documentary itself is almost entirely secondary sources #its also worth nothing that it doesnt look like any reputable history journals reviewed this doc #disclaimer to my own statement: i know very very little ru*ssian history #but i know waaaaaaay too much about us imperialism in south america and the middle east and the doc kept getting that VERY WRONG #which tipped me off to start questioning the rest of it #like seriously every time they would start to explain what was happening in the us and south america i would be like wow red flag red flag #another sentence another red flag something is up #on the surface it all is very believable and there is some valid information but be cautious #i think my biggest fear for the united states right now is that teenagers in school are not taught how to think critically #especially with stuff like this

[dyketennant]

being a crowley kinnie is harder than being a u.s. marine

#“it's a relationship that's up to interpretation” There Better Be Mad NDAs In Place Right Now #good omens 2 #anthony j crowley #frustrated dyke ranting in the tags do not eat #(dont get it twisted i do not blame any of the cast/crew playing into the 'bromance' narrative) #(bc i get theyre under contract and things are sticky rn) #(just so fucking sick of queer love and relationships being boiled down to “up to interpretation” and erased) #not saying good omens is intentionally doing that it's more my outrage towards articles and season 2 promo that baits fans #while simultaneously belittling and gaslighting (bold word ik) said fans #and honestly? would just feel really nice to shove it in the face of everyone who insulted good omens fans for liking a ship #that's selfish and mean i know but it would be satisfying to have like an ofmd moment where i can point and say “look! i'm not delusional!” #especially bc neil has stated multiple times that it *is* a love story. even if they're not making out on screen or whatever #and i hate that queer representation has to always be an argument like this #wow i did not mean to go off for this long in the tags i've really been holding that in for a while

[knowlesian]

okay i can’t put this in the orange essay but i have to say it!!!! holy fuck i realized ed and stede hit one of my very favorite tropes: when someone burned by life meets someone with blind faith in themselves/justice/whatever it is they have delusional levels of surety in and the blind faith one just keeps being right until the other one is like 

...borderline sure you control reality with your mind? either way you’re magic and i would like to live in your magic pocket. we’re in love now even if you don’t know it, i will literally do the weirdest shit with you and assume your ability to warp reality to your will can handle the rest.

#see also: kane and abby from the 100 #abby is this privileged pinball just zooming around like AHAHAHA I AM A FOLK HERO NOW #I AM NEVER WORKING OFF HUMAN LOGIC ALONE AND I AM ALWAYS RIGHT #and kane is like ...fuckin hate this wow this is terrible (lowkey converting to the church of abigail griffin) #i bailed on the 100 fairly early in s4 when it became clear this shit was not gonna get better #but i truly loved s1-2 and ...well. i liked the bare bones of s3 #lol @ execution of what could have been very cool #anyway abby and kane were my shit what hilarious dingbats #abby is like: never once have i considered consequences apply to my wonderful self #i exist in a state of being so goddamned right everyone ignores i am a liiiitttttllllleeee delusional (affectionate) #and kane is like: holy shit why is she ALWAYS RIGHT i want to touch her face #ahhhh those were the days #anyway yes: love this vibe #see also: catherine/everyone on the great

[isabelguerra]

i love pnat dynamics so much i cannot put it into words everyone is so wrong about each other except when they are right. nobody talks to anyone they should be talking to that would make for interesting and compelling character development. the interpersonal drama is so burdened that characters can barely look at each other without feeling horrible. its so genuinely unironically my favorite

#paranatural #edit this is NOT praising the writing. this is dunking on it. not bad dunking exactly like affectionate dunking but dunking nonetheless #its ‘wow youre terrible. i like you.’ we’re bitter exes. we’re divorced #ive been reading this comic for so long and theyve been with me for so long sometimes i forget everyone is like 12 #characters u feel u have grown up with but they have stayed the same. you are the one who has changed. #anyway in my little imaginary mega headcanon au theyre all college students right now and they will deal with college student depressi #on right there with me #‘there are already adults in pn’ well i dont care about them have you considered that. #isabel guerra is a 22yo lit major who hasnt experienced summer the same way since she was 16 and misses it #max puckett is her roommate who sits upside down on their shitty apartment couch while isabel works on her thesis and he talks to her about #camera techniques. ed calls from art school three states over sometimes but they arent as close as they were when they were 12 and that gap #has only widened. they both want things to go back to how they were before but neither know how #isaac age 23 still feels his emotions very strongly but has gotten better at confronting them #hes 23 so hes a dumbass bc 23yos are dumbasses but hes working so that by his 30s he’ll get his psychology lisence to help confused kids #johnny and isabel started hanging out in highschool and haven’t stopped since. he comes over a lot for him and isabel to bounce ideas #off each other. he helps her w her lit research bc isabel loves it but is kinda shit at it. johnnys an english major #so hes better with that stuff but still pretty stupid. hes just got good at old english bc of forge #if it gets late sometimes theyll just turn the lights out and listen to the fan run in the dark. they usually keep that part a secret though #max knows he just doesn’t say anything. isabel appreciates it. #rj goes to the same art school as ed and studies photography. theyre really good at it they’ve gotten some big gigs #but their favorite thing to photograph is their friends every time theyre home #stephens getting his media degree to start his own ghost hunting show. he has a youtube channel but hes trying too hard w it. #needs 2 loosen up and have some fun. ollie wants 2 be a veterinarian but hes taking a couple gap years while taking on and off classes #at the local community college. hes doin pretty good #i did not realize how much ive been typing. beddy bye goodnight <3

[frootielooties]

you guys have no idea what state i'm in right now. by my side is my eras cup fulled with ice water, i have kinder buenos right in front of me, i changed my sheets, i washed my hair, i've gotten the lighting just right, both of the fans in my room are on, my blankets are the perfect weight and temperature, i'm watching matpat, and i just took a benadryl.

#i don't even know what state i'm in right now #and my among us plushie is holding up my laptop wow #me !

[puppysdog]

i dont belong anywhere except dead

#.txt #i just wish i felt like i belonged somewhere #like anywhere at all #my own home doesnt feel like mine #this entire state wants me dead #any connections i make trickle down and fizz out and dont mean shit #i dont even feel like i belong in my own skin #this body is digusting and fake and i want to ruin it #anytime ive thought ive looked good was actually a lie #the real me is absolutely abhorrent and doesnt belong anywhere #i dont feel like i belong in yhe queer community #yeah im queer whatever but i dont belong #too other #too other for the cishets too other for other queers #wish i couldve just stayed a boy. or just a girl. wouldve been easier #i just cant keep doing this shit. i feel so alone and far from everything and everyone #im not saying mark was right but maybe he was onto smth when he said i was only good when being used #wow sad thought. gonna go sob my eyes out now. lol anyways

[moinsbienquekaworu]

But what about men when they're bruised & bloodied

#i won't blorbotag but if you know what i've been watching recently you know who the blorbo is #i'm lucky to be watching a show that loves to show me my darling blorbo in all kinds of injured states #his own blood on himself someone else's blood on him cuts and bruises and wounds and stitches in a lot of places #and obviously pathetic little lost kitten face but that's emotional hurt not something physical #talked about it with my friend m and they said they liked their women bruised on occasion (in fun contexts or just standard violence) #but they weren't a fan of the blood and honestly i'm too fascinated by blood to be indifferent to it #blood has a fantastic colour a texture that makes it look good and i don't know it's just Something #there's another guy in the show i'm watching that has bad bruises on his face for a while #and every time he showed up on screen i was like 'owie that must hurt' and at the same time 'wow he looks good in those' #they weren't sexy bruises to be clear he just got hit in the face repeatedly. in a non sexy way. extremely unsexy #but like it gave his face a dimension it just Did Something!!! #and right before that i was teetering on meow meow territory with another character #he was the reason i made that 'i need to learn to draw bruises' post and honestly still haven't mastered those but i need to #to give my blorbo some fun bruises for once instead of unsexy dangerous ones #wow i have a ramble tag now

[katnissgirlsmakedo]

logically i know that merlin was being made over ten years ago and that’s why it’s Like That but also i cannot help but be completely captivated by the Like That of it.

#actually i don’t think they have an excuse to be homophobic. cassandra clare was releasing tmi at exactly the same time #which is not something i’ve ever thought about before but. wow. #city of ashes came out the same year merlin premiered #huh. letting that sink it. the same year obama was elected. the same year i got my julie american girl doll #damn that’s crazy. also. the recession. which i must admit i forgot about. sorry i was busy with my american girl dolls idk #what the hell was this post supposed to be about how did we get here #wait city of lost souls came out the same year season five aired. in a post twilight landscape #but a pre-dystopia craze landscape. actually right on the cusp. has anyone analyzed that societal transition? we went from twilight to the #hunger games in like the same year. and then it was a weird mix of supernatural romance and dystopian teen movies for a while #and then of course the mcu took over everything and now we live in hell where there are no real blockbuster movies anymore #wow now i’m depressed about the state of cinema. not what this post was for. #whatever. my point was going to be this. has any interviewer tried asking anyone involved with merlin about It All NOW. like has anyone #tried to bring it up in the past nine years. i feel like if we tried again they’d have more to say #can some bullshit streaming service show cast katie mcgrath in something so she can be super famous online for like a month am #and she can say what needs to be said. i trust her #if EYE was in charge of some dumb show’s pr i’d cast one of these bitches just for this purpose #i can’t believe no one has thought of this #ok i’ll shut up now i know the post got away from me #beth.txt

[laomelettedufromage]

This is turning into the spring of how many times can I complain about emails to my friends before they get sick of me

#I’m trying to restrain myself so bad right now #basically I work on a study where we collect frogs #and we do it all over the United States #so that means we have to get state permits - great #okay we’ve got most our state permits #however we would normally road cruise for frogs but not all frog species can be reliably found on roads #so we’re started requesting wildlife management areas and national forests #however for a lot of these states we have just fairly recently got our state permit #and we need our state permit to apply to these other places #and so we are applying to a bunch a bit close to the wire to when we plan to be there #and oooohh my god every time I contact someone there is more people to contact #and more paperwork to fill out #dear god #and like everyone is super nice! #and helpful and stuff but wow… emails are exhausting #communicating with twenty different people at once is more exhausting then searching for frogs for real #by yours truly the omelette of cheese

[astrxealis]

about to become a fuuta kajiyama apologist

#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚ #⋯ ꒰ა milgram ໒꒱ *·˚ #HI PLEASE NOTE THIS IS /HJ (A HALF-JOKE. mostly just a joke tbh) #i don't like being an apologist for anything even if it's fiction LMAO </3 #i will stop rambling (lie) #i love fuuta (real) #i think many just look at him face-value hebhgbahbghebhgjbjhebgjh but also IDK milgram makes me confused about my thinking process and all #it is just a wednesday what the fuck. i almost forgot i unfortunately still have homework #wow anyways can't believe i was here for the milgram site lowkey breaking bcs of fuuta. his power!!! he is so fire!!! #will never shut up about those kinda puns now. sorry (not) #oops i forgot to vote for yuno at all yet. i voted for haruka yesterday!! #did innocent to lower the gap a bit but ultimately i want to make sure he gets guilty but i am so conflicted....... #yuno ngl i would w/o a doubt vote innocent but i'm unsure what would be say... best for her? she doesn't have an actual crime imo #and i'm glad a lot feel the same (she has the right to do whatever she wants w her body!) but i do think she's too careless/apathetic #not that being apathetic or careless is necessarily bad but i wonder if a triple-innocent would be best even if i agree she should be #innocent. (please don't cancel me btw i'm just stating my thoughts at all hjhbadjgh i am pro-choice i love women fr) #i wonder what would happen with a verdict of 50/50. also idk if i've been using the word verdict right all this time lmfao

[roundhousekickingheight]

19 and/or 37 for the ask game? hope you are having a nice day!!

OOPS I TOTALLY THOUGHT I ANSWERED THIS SORRY. i did have a good day, thanks!

19. favorite thing about the day?

well to be honest i do not like daytime. i thrive between sunset and sunrise. i hate the sun. this is why everyone calls me a vampire. however! i truly think nothing can capture the feeling of waking up at 11 am on a weekend and making the same shit for breakfast as i have for the past year and a half or playing a video game of my choosing for most of the day. i’d say around 4 pm on any weekend is when i most frequently do the most niche thing or just research literally anything. that’s all just more so my favorite part of the weekend though/

37. share a secret.

once when i was eight i took a paintbrush and some blue oil paint and painted a stripe down the doorway to the bathroom. a few hours later, when my mom discovered it, i thought i was done for. oh no i participated in property destruction why did i do that!!! why didn’t i learn from getting in trouble for mixing eyeshadow with vaseline in her laundry detergent measuring cup!!! this is what happens when i let the intrusive thoughts win!!! however, the first thing out of her mouth was not scolding. instead, it was, “did [family friend’s daughter who was visiting our house] do this?” i just nodded. she handed an out to me on a silver platter, of course i was going to take it. and then when the family friend’s daughter denied doing it, she DIDN’T BELIEVE HER. she started being an ass to me around that time, i wonder if she knew. eh, probably not.

years later (ok like last year) my mom asked again, “did you do that? honestly, i wouldn’t even be mad at this point.” i said no anyways. and you, dear followers, are now the only ones privy to this knowledge i swore i’d take to my grave...

#wow you can really tell my mental state right now #<- one that causes me to write way too much #thank you for the ask puffle this was. it was. #ask tag #text