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Look At Those Old Photos
I know, I know, my anxiety spiked at that title too. Looking through old photos is a terrifying thing. Especially if you don’t remember what photos are on your phone. As I glance through these images of smiling faces and insane moments of the past few years, many different things run through my mind. First comes the sadness, all the pain and troubles come flooding back as you recall your state of mind at the time. The lost friends, lovers, jobs, opportunities, etc. It’s what keeps me from saving ALL of my photos, and from looking at them a lot. However, if you just keep going through the anxiety, you’ll come to realize all the fun and happiness you had at the time too. All the times you hung out with your friends, all the times you laughed with them, all the times you screamed lyrics at the top of your lungs with them, and all the insane stories you have to share about those moments. For all the torture I do to myself by looking and reminiscing, that momentary happiness from all the fun makes it all worth it. So I implore you, go look through those old photos. Yes, your anxiety will bother you. Hell, it might even hurt. But I promise, the good outweighs the bad every time. Make sure you share your experiences! That’s the best part of them. So, here are just a few of mine.
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When The Music's Over
A colossal part of the culture I find myself experiencing is the endless parties. Whether it's with friends, lovers, or even complete strangers, there's always a party going on that you're invited to. And while it may feel like the party never stops, believe me when I say it does. Now, I'm sure plenty of you readers have partied with me or have partied at some point. But, the following is simply a few points that come to my mind at the end of these wild nights. I tend to keep these thoughts close to my drunken chest, so I apologize for the rashness of them. 1. A morning of awkwardness is far better than a night of loneliness. 2. You find out the most beautiful things about someone over a 2 AM cigarette. 3. No matter how badly you want this night to last forever, the sun will rise. So you might as well be there to see it! 4. All those feelings you have at the midway point of the party, save them. Revisit them at the end and the next morning. I guarantee reality has Dick-slapped you. 5. Last, and maybe most importantly, appreciate the fact that you're existing at this point in time. Simply stop, smoke a cigarette, drink a beer, or just take a moment to realize that you're experiencing a memory that countless people will share and discuss for years to come. You're not hearing or even remembering this party, you're living and breathing it.
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The Long and Lonely Road
Life is a lot like a highway, you just drive till you crash. The road takes many curves, rises and falls, and yet it always ends. Thinking like this, I want to make sure my highway is scenic. One thing you must consider is, all the exits along the way. Every choice you've made will change your course, for better or worse, and you don't really know where the road leads till you get off the exit. All the advice I can give you, like a deep and robust voice resonating from your gps, is this; every night I try and have the time of my life. Because, you never really know when you're gonna crash on the road. And yet, I'm hurt every morning. As I lie in bed and am haunted by the roads not travelled. All you can do is keep moving forward, hoping the exit you passed last night was not your upmost.
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Friends without benefits.
Looking back at my life, I've had a shit ton of "friends." But, looking back, a lot of the "friends" I had were just extremely toxic people who impacted my life in a negative way. And it's so fucked up that people can just enter your life, you thinking everything is going to be awesome, and it turn out to be a horrible relationship. What little friends I have left I cherish, because life doesn't give you a lot. It's important to know your own worth and make sure your friends recognize it too. Because life will give you lots of toxic people, just make sure you're able to weed them out from the people who will make your life extraordinary.
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Matt Brown hates you all.
Well, here's the start to something that I'm sure will amount to just as much as everything else in my life. Spoiler alert, it's nothing. I guess my first post should be who I am and what I'm about, but that's a complicated subject. I'm a 7'2" ginger... and yes I know that's gigantic. I'm a writer, and this being Tumblr, I assumed creating a blog might help the creative process. I'm definitely a nihilist at heart, but I also see the beauty in everyone I meet. This world we all inhabit is fucked up all around, honestly, and I'm just a guy trying to make it through to the end. If you've read this far, I applaud you. Now go out there and read something! Preferably something of mine.
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