#:((( why does my hobby make me sad and want to quit

[strawbie-doodle]

havent drawn all of them in a WHILE ✸

#critical role #bells hells #critrole #ashton greymoore #orym of the air ashari #imogen temult #chetney pock o'pea #fearne calloway #laudna #fresh cut grass #bell's hells #art #my art #almost gave up on this so many times #but that chet wolf and side profile ashton were just too good to give up on #and as always fearne looks so good #really proud of the imogen here too i think she looks so cute #i had to redraw her so many times im so bad at drawing her :[ #ANYWAY HI I FINALLY MAKE ART AND POST IT #been having the worst art block ever :( #its made me so depressed and then i got even more depressed cuz i wasnt being productive but i couldnt do anything cuz i was depressed #:((( why does my hobby make me sad and want to quit #um anyways did you guys watch that new dungmeshi episode #the tonal whiplash was fucking crazy i loved it

[dragonnarrative-writes]

Part 3 - Meeting Kyle For Coffee

This is not in chronological order but I needed for this to get out of my head. Takes place after the end of Charlie's Charmed!Slasher!Simon series.

(If you don't want to read it, in the end, Simon does serial killer things. What a rascal!)

Slasher Handler Masterlist

Kyle Garrick is just as unreasonably pretty as he ever was, sitting in the cafe and drinking something hot. He’s a bit leaner in the face than you remember from high school. His jaw is sharper, but his smile is still so inviting.

When he spots you coming, his smile seems to light up the whole room.

You say, “Thank you, for agreeing to meet with me. Give me just a minute to order?”

“I ordered you a caramel latte,” he says with a smile. “You still like them?”

“Yeah, I do,” you admit, and sit down.

“I asked them not to start making it until you got here,” he says, taking another sip of his drink. “Figured you’d appreciate it being made fresh. All things considered.”

You blow out a breath and lean back in your chair. “That’s… actually why I wanted to talk to you.”

“I figured,” he says with a grin. “We haven’t talked since just after graduation. We do each other a favor, then say our sad goodbyes. And years later, out of the blue you hit me up? Looking for another favor. Could break a man’s heart.”

You bite your lip and look at the smiling man across from you. A barista appears at your elbow with an almost overfull mug and places it gently on the table. She gives Kyle a grin before flouncing away.

“Cheers,” he says, lifting his own mug in a gentle salute. He waits until you’ve taken a sip to continue. “So, how big is he?”

“What?” When you look up at him, he’s still smiling. His face hasn’t changed. But his brown eyes are flat and empty. Your heart beats just a bit faster.

“How big is he? I don’t do things the way I used to. I need to know so I can make it look like an accident.”

The last time Kyle did you a favor, the coroner had not ruled it an accident. No one had ever been accused of or charged with the death of David Toole-Kirk. But that amount of thallium doesn’t eat a person from the inside out on accident.

“I… um. I didn’t ask you here for that kind of favor,” you say. Your hands are burning where they’re wrapped around your mug. You feel like if you take them off, you’ll freeze under his stare. “I was hoping that you could… give me some advice?”

That brings genuine mirth to Kyle’s eyes. “Oh, this aught to be good.”

“I just… there is a guy,” you say. “Just… Do you… still go… hunting?”

Kyle grins and sits back in his chair. “Hunting?”

“Please answer the question,” you groan.

His grin is wide. His teeth are perfect. “No, can’t say that I do. Bit more of the gardening type now, in my old age.”

“We’re not even thirty,” you say, dumbly.

“This guy you know,” he prompts, barely keeping back laughter. “He likes to… go hunting, then?”

“He’s a pretty avid… hunter,” you say, carefully. “But I was hoping that I might be able to help him find another… hobby?”

Kyle Garrick looks almost ready to burst at the seams with the laughter he’s holding in. If you hadn’t had such a recent and thorough reminder not to get complacent with predators, you might have swatted at him. As it is, you can only clench your jaw as you watch him try and fail to keep a straight face.

“I know,” you hiss, “I know.”

“You really, really don’t,” Kyle wheezes. “Oh my god.”

“He says he doesn’t want to hurt me,” you say, looking around nervously. “But he’s taken me hunting twice, and I can’t do that again.”

That’s what breaks him. He bursts into peals of laughter, peppered with “he’s taken you,”s and “oh my days,”s that fill the whole cafe. It shocks you into giggles.

“Will you quit it!” You eventually whisper-shout.

“How did you manage to meet two of us?” Kyle wipes tears from his eyes. “My word. He’s taken you on hunting trips, and now you want to find him a new hobby.”

“Please,” you hiss. “I’m a little bit desperate and a lot at the end of my rope, here.”

And then Simon Riley’s voice says, right behind you, “Garrick.”

You’re a little bit grateful that Simon’s hands wrap around your wrists from above at the same moment, because otherwise you’d have thrown your coffee in the air. His sternum presses against the crown of your head. You tip your head, just a bit, rolling your eyes up to see him. He’s not looking at you. He’s staring at Kyle.

Kyle grins. “Riley. Good to see you, mate. How’s the family?”

“Still dead, you muppet,” Simon says, pulling out the chair next to you and settling in. When you eye him, he’s got that not-quite-blank look that means he might be thinking about smiling. “How do you know my girl?”

“Went to secondary together,” Kyle says with a grin. “She was bloody terrible at chemistry. Luckily, we got paired up. I helped her with a personal project before she went off to uni. It’s been years. Was pleasantly surprised when she reached out.”

“You’re online?” Simon asks, disdainfully.

“Calls more attention not to be,” Kyle points out.

“Told you,” you can’t help but mumble into your drink.

Simon gives a considering hum and his usual answer. “Technically, I’m dead.” To Kyle he says, not bothering to lower his voice. “If you meet up with her without my permission again, I’ll kill you slow.”

You gape at him, and, daringly, slap his shoulder. “You can’t tell me who I can and can’t hang out with.”

He leans in to kiss your forehead. “Sure, sweetheart.”

#my writing #cod #fanfiction #kyle gaz garrick #simon ghost riley #dark fic #simon riley x you #slasher handler #dragonnarrativewrites fanfiction #manic pixie dream ghost

[justalia]

Hi Alia!!!! I wanted to know about what are some signs of great self concept? I have been working on my self concept for more than a month now, and I have had a major mental shift, but today I had been feeling down and not that good, like as if nothing is working. I feel like crying and just not that great. (I am so sorry for dumping it like this). Maybe knowing the signs of great self concept would help me? I have had pretty good self talk as well, and everything coming out of my mouth or any thoughts have been in my favor too. I really don't know why I'm feeling like this today. Your help would mean a lot to me. I love you loads!!! Love, Mei Minatozaki ❤️‍🔥 (I am Japanese and I'm still learning english, please guide me through any mistakes I make, for I'm using a translation tool. Please take care of me, I'm in your care)

hi mei!

you sound like a truly kind soul and i would love to help you out of this pickle.

you see i’m sure you’ve done a lot of work on yourself, you may have incorporated new habits, new hobbies, a new mental diet, and you may have even seen the results of these changes meant to “reprogram” in some way your “self concept”.

the word “self-concept” has been severely misused in this community, “self concept” means “a conception of the self” and a conception of the self could be anything, you can conceptualize your Self to be anything actually.

there are no signs of a great “self concept” because the word “self-concept” is just neutral, it implies an idea you attached to your Self and it is just that: an idea.

“self-concept” does not mean being perfectly disciplined, perfectly confident, assured and having no bad days. “self concept” means “idea of Self”. an identity some might say.

if you feel like crying you are meant to be crying, if you feel like being sad you are meant to be sad in that specific moment. if any emotions come up you are meant to be feeling every single one of them.

see we are not meant to fight or try to control our thoughts and emotions, you can feel them and have your fill of crying for as long as you may need to.

check my last post on the self i made.

you are not who you think you are right now. you are not meant to convince Mei of being in a certain way having certain thoughts instead of others, feeling certain emotions.

you are not meant to convince Mei of being something that she obviously is not.

Mei is your ego, an identity you created of yourself and believed in it so strongly it came to be.

to “change your life” you’re only meant to let go of this Mei character you’ve created. listen you can truly go on forever checking your thoughts and your words until every single one of them is “in your favor”, but truly you will always find something to change about that character you have created because the ego is constantly creating fears out of the urge to “protect” you. you will always find something new to change, some new “belief” from this character comes up snd you’ll feel the need to fix it. fix everything that comes in your mental sight.

it is quite exhausting as you can imagine.

what if that wasn’t you?

what if there was nothing to fix?

[meowzilla93]

Oh hello, another Baxter request!

More baby Baxter headcannons please! Specifics on his home life as a kid, more about school, anything about his Origin Story would be greatly appreciated 🙂

oooooh i like this

unwritten territory! (well so far)

lets just say I have lots of thoughts about this and this is just from what I have gathered in my review of Step 3 moments; Hang, Sightseeing and Drinks (more will come with the rest of the steps and OLNF plays)

This wont be the sweetest post ever, its gonna be a little sads, hopefully i can end it with some Sweet Baxter

BABY BAXTER!

Bold and outspoken, but still tried to avoid hurting others feelings or subjecting them to any bullying

Simply said, if he didnt like you or you werent worth his little kid time, he just avoided you - no point being dirty about it

The OLNF were his only friends outside of the society he was forced to grow up in - in addition to being the only people HIS AGE as well

Was dragged along to a lot of dinners and events that his parents either hosted or attended and forced to act the same age as the other people there

He said so himself - parents are quite educated, esteemed, and a tad old. which meant company is also old, not an environment to act as a kid

This is how and why he acts and speaks the way he does - his way of speech and gentlemeness was molded by the people he had to associate with

I do not think he was truly spoilt- his was provided all the opportunities that his parents believed he needed, but nothing more than that

This caused Baxter to miss out on a lot of childhood activites growing up

With the minimal amount of time he did get to spend with the ONFL gang, that was still the only time he truly got to act like a kid

And even then, I think he was chastized by his parents if they found out how childish he was behaving - they had expectations for him you see

Behave with the maturity of someone his parents age or somehow older, but get the level of respect of an infant

before the OLNF gang, he only knew that his family money made him popular with other rich kids and so used to flaunt that as a way to make friends

later on he hated doing this, realising how forced and false those relationships where and started making steps to avoid that moving forward (badly though)

AND THIS IS WHAT MAKES HIM A LITTLE PRAT AND REBEL

He for sure was that very respectful kid when talking to his parents and elders and others, but he knew just how to tease or backchat in such a way where he didnt get caught out, but he knew what he was doing

He always liked dressing up, he didnt mind that, but if he was going to, it was with his own vision, not his parents

This is why he held on so tight to the black and white thing. It was his choice and within his control - he got to do something he wanted rather than his parents

He so pulled pranks at these 'elite' events, hands down this was the nonsense he pulled

And so from the controlling gilded cage that was his life, he rebelled with his outfit choices, choice of friends and hobbies, and did his best to try and reject the lifestyle his parents foisted onto him

School life- I kinda touch on this in a previous post but lets rehash!

A+ student that screwed around in class

Oh HE FLIRTED SO MUCH - with everyone. teachers were not exempt from it (let me be clear im saying this in the most HARMLESS WAY)

let me elaborate - he has an eye for detail, so if a teacher changed their hair colour or perfume or wore a different outfit from usual, he would probably make a comment on it as he is handing in his homework or being told to answer a question on the whiteboard

THATS the start of the bad rep he has - STILL HARMLESS

again he backchats to the teachers, probably got pulled into the principals office a lot

parents get called and when they arrive he is just there chatting away with the principal like nothing was wrong and the principal is just like "im not even sure why I called you, sorry"

As he gets older he gets bolder with his flirting with other students, stopping it entirely with the teachers when he reaches middle school? (i am aussie! Im so sorry, i think this might be like freshman year or just before? Im thinking like grade 9)

So sophmore year is when he start sleeping around

And because he is shameless and figures why not its not harming anyone so long as he is respectful, just continues his little one night stands

His parents hate it; He does it more out of spite

Really leans into the black and white fits and he becomes really know for it around school and Golden Grove

and rumors fly that he is loose with his affections and is a little shit to teachers and adults

and suddenly that is simply who he is - the rumors floated around enough that he was given a bad rep - probably a bad boy rep that his parents tried to smother as much as they could to no avail

But what was happening with the gang all this time?

I think he didnt want to affect them with his antics, didnt want them to deal with his poor parents and their expectations so he just drifted away from them

watched them grow and thrive from a distance

He never stopped caring, he never wanted to walk away, but with everything that was going on, it was the better option

Of course he didnt tell them this, so its just another bad rumor about him now - he doesnt care for others and only cares for himself

His decision to move to Virginia helped him to start finding himself better, figure out the person he wants to be but with all the negativity he grew up with, self inflicted and inflicted by his parents, he just couldnt get out of that bad habit of keeping people at a distance

OH ALSO - being aware of his poor upbringing doesnt stop the trauma from going unrecognized and instill into him the perfect people pleaser he has become

He hurt too many people in Golden Grove with his antics, so now he must avoid ever doing that again

The perfect son, the perfect partner, the perfect friend, the perfect romance, the perfect stranger - there is no room for anything else

I am so sorry I swear I love him.

Lets try and loosen things up now

He believes in fate - oh he loves magic and reads mythology and all that but he really has a soft place in his heart for fate

His eyes portray his emotions more than anything else - sad part is its due to his parents requiring him to be a certain way, but if you wanna know what is going on in his head, look at his eyes

he learnt this at a young age, keep your emotions hidden, but his sweet eyes cannot contain his joy or mirth or teasing

that rock paper scissors thing? i recon it started more as a way to ensure his friends got what they wanted, as he didnt want anything more than their company

those big piles of leaves during autumn? oh he for sure would go lie in them to get away from the world

he enjoys walks and strolls cause as a young kid it was a way to venture into the magic and beauty of the forests and let himself go for a bit

ballroom dancing? same sitch, it was the magic of music and the way that you looked like you floated on the dance floor

magic, and i mean the magic of experience and the world around you, not 'is this your card' magic holds a very special place in his heart

loves watching the colours in the sky change at sunset - please take this man to see the Aurora Borealis, i think he might just cry

he for sure stole dancing partners for fun during rehersals

his little crush in Qui? mustve seen them do a leap and spin or something whilst some sweet romantic music was playing in the background and he was just down right smitten for them at that point

the ONFL was his first found family, i really cannot wait for him to reconnect with them!

siiigh, i thats all i have for now, i need to do more research lol

if you like this or have any prompts please do not hesitate! I might be a touch slow to respond but thats due to life and also i will research the hell out of everything to give you the most :D

#our life beginnings and always #baxter ward #olba baxter #our life #olba #olba mc

[1julak1]

Hello! Please forgive me.

If you are still doing matchups, is it alright if I get a (normal, animatronic) romantic Fnaf Security Breach one? I understand if this is closed and you may ignore this message if so.

My pronouns are she/her, I'm an introvert and if you consider astrology, I am an Aquarius Sun, Cancer Moon and Leo Rising. I am straight and prefer guys but if that doesn't count than you can ignore. I don't really like revealing much about myself so you can say that I'm shy and mysterious. My hobbies include dancing (especially ballet and sometimes kpop). My talent is fitting into kids clothes because of slender my body is. My expression tends to look very distant and sad. I cannot emphasize enough how much I want to look like a Ball Jointed Doll, so I try to get as many sweet lolita dresses as possible. I love tea and coffee, I also like wearing (and buying) anything pink. I don't like heavy or gourmet meals (or food in general). If I were to be an animatronic, I'd be a cat.

If this wasn't enough information, please let me know 😭

(Ahh, as this is my first fnaf match, i hope you'll enjoyy, and i did everything right!!)

Your match is Sundrop!

The first time you and Sun met, he thought you were actually a kid-! Being the responsible daycare attendant he is, he picked you up and immediately brought you back to the daycare!

Only when you've started speaking, with the tiny voice of yours, he understood how mistaken he was! Nonetheless, with the bubbly personality he has, he managed to open your introverted self up a little, and you two had quite a good time in the daycare.

Except if you went around throwing things! Or tried to turn the lights off...

You were quite the duo - you were fairly quiet most of the time, acting as if you weren't even there, letting Sun do all the talking. And oh he loved it! He was a little protective over you still, because even knowing your age you looked so frail to him!

When you got a bit more acquainted, he immediately noticed how much you seemed to get in the tunes of music. And then he found out why - because you were keen on dancing! He was overjoyed! He immediately got into it and encouraged you to dance with him. You were both having fun, blasting the music loudly and just dancing like two sillies.

The other thing you two liked to do was play dressing up! He'd either look trough your clothes and try to make outfits out of them - he's trying his best! - or he'd get you some of those Freddy Merch shirts and let you try them on! There's nothing better for him than seeing you having fun.

He's a little worried about the fact that you don't seem to eat a lot. He cares for you very much, and sometimes may try to persuade you to eat. Some yum pizza, or other treats from the Pizzaplex?? He'll bring those right up!

And because he cares so much.. he's a bit worried he might hurt you, accidentally of course. He knows you may be in danger when Moon takes over, so he took his time to thoroughly explain to you why you should be careful with the lights, and what to do if he switches to his evil side. Your safety is a must for him! But still, he does his best not to turn the mood off to much, and keep you entertained!

Overall, Sundrop is a very sweet partner! He'll light up your day, make you fall in love with him - and babysit you, if you'll need!

(I hope it's up to your expectations!! 💗)

#fnaf #fnaf security breach #fnaf matchup #sundrop #daycare attendant sun #fnaf security breach matchup

[maledistributionsystem]

Heyy i have a question for you bro. First of all i love your posts, it's so encouraging and makes me feel genuely better abt myself. My question is how do i make up for a boyhood i never had? I'm 18 and transitioning isn't available to me, my country is extremely homophobic and id simply need someone to tell me my chest doesn't make me a girl etc but i don't know any queer folks irl and it feels like im missing out

Thank you for contacting the Male Distribution System Bark Line. Remember: Mens bodies come in many shapes, sizes, colors, and heights. Being unconventional does not detract from your validity. Your message is in the queue...

hey man whats good!

This is something I've been doing/thinking about for years, and honestly I'm not sure how applicable my advice is, but i'll still try :^)

I grew up real sheltered and closed away from the world, there's a lot that I never got the chance to experience or be taught that I've had to make up for. I'll ask ya, What weren't you allowed to do due to your socialization/upbringing? for me the answers are: Tackle football, watching star wars, playing with "boy toys" from fast food meals, walking around shirtless, wearing "simple" clothes, stuff like that.

Dont be afraid to derive gender euphoria from shit thats uselessly gendered. I still use Old Spice deoderant because it was Boy Deoderant and i really liked the way it smelled when i was 17 lol. Buy "mens" body wash, use "mens" razors, stuff like that! (In america all these things are less than 10$ so im very sorry if thats bad advice for you)

My answer for experiencing boyhood is: Let yourself be free in all the ways you wish you could have at that age. Collect monster trucks, build lego sets, watch wrestling or mma or boxing or [insert overwhelmingly male-dominated physical sport here], engage with hobbies that are male-dominated and feel good about talking to other men online who participate too.

honestly on that note, make a social media account divorced from any of your other ones with no indicators whatsoever that you're trans, just say you're a man (if you specify at all) and interact with dudes anonymously, kinda like you did me here. It's such a quiet and hidden thing to do, but when i was in highschool (14-17 years old for me) it was one of the most validating things i did for myself. I was just one of the guys, because i literally am.

But also, that boy needs to cry. I'm serious, let him scream and be angry and punch things, let him be sad and ask "why couldnt i have this before?". That little boy inside you could use the aknowledgement.

Also hey, i know you dont got no IRL queer folks to say it to you, so i will: having a chest dont make you any less of a man. Wearing a binder hurts my back, badly. So i stopped wearing them and havent worn a binder in a few years now. I still correct people to tell them im a dude. I just let them hang about freely. I'm just a dude with a chest, and i make people deal with seeing that. Even if you can't go around correcting people and shit, i want you to know it in your heart. Dudes have chests sometimes. Not even just trans dudes! Cis dudes get gynecomastia at varying (but usually a bit older) ages and have to get surgery too. Hell, even those gymrats addicted to roids get tit fat that need to be removed. They're all still men, and so are you. I dont care what it looks like, you're still a man.

I'm sorry if this wasn't quite what you was looking for, but i hope you know you're a brother to us all, and like any brother would, i hope you get what you're looking for out of your life. You deserve it.

Be easy, now ☆

#Bark Line #had to redo my tags on this one bc i forgot using quotations fucks them up. gods i hate tumblr sometimes #anyways #it might look stupid or childish to other people to see me sitting here like #'play into gender roles to make yourself feel better' #but im actually serious it feels so good and the unnecessary gendering of random shit isnt going away #might as well use it to make yourself feel better lol

[whimsical-sonic]

🦂 sonic oc showdown q&a 🦂

logo by @bunnymajo!! you are awesome @sonic-oc-showdown thank you for giving me reasons to talk about my boy nya

✨- How did you come up with the OC’s name? sting is what scorpions do! they sting. bonus points because it's funny! it sounds like a command. "sting the scorpion"

🌼 - How old are they? (Or approximate age range) 17

🌺- Do they have any love interest(s)? not at all! he's got other things on his mind

🍕 - What is their favorite food? hmm good question! something spicy. my partner says he'd be more popular with the girlies if he ate ice cream but that's not how he rolls. sad for the girlies 😔

💼 - What do they do for a living? two things! sting is a medical student with a focus in neurology! his poison primarily affects the nervous system so he wanted to learn specifically how that worked, and that led to a general interest in the field. as a result, he always carries a vial of antivenom with him, just in case someone has a really bad reaction his more full-time position is as a mercenary! medical lessons were expensive, so he needed a way to pay it all off. he's taken up all sorts of odd jobs as a result. he doesn't really question what he's doing so long as he gets paid well. in my fanstory, he's doing contracted work for an ex-gun researcher named taz nocturne. afterwards, he occasionally helps out team chaotix as an informant

🎹 - Do they have any hobbies? sting would consider his mercenary work as a hobby tbh? it was supposed to be a hobby. he won't admit that it's basically his Job now. he likes to sign up for martial art classes to learn new techniques, not necessarily to participate in tournaments (though he would like to one day). asides from that, he likes to play sudoku :] he is not good at it

🎯 - What do they do best? close-range fighting, that's why being paid to fight someone is one of his favorite jobs. he's also Really good at shooter-type arcade games like galaga, do not try and beat his score

🥊 - What do they love to do? What do they hate to do? to rephrase what i said above: he likes to fight, primarily because he Knows he's good at close-range combat and it makes him feel good to prove that again and again. sting needs someone to knock him down and remind him that he is, in fact, not the Best at what he does he hates doing things unfairly, which is why he refrains from using his tail in combat. that said, he'll use his stinger if he has to, as the job ultimately comes before his pride

❤️ - What is one of your OC’s best memories? to be quite honest i haven't thought about it!

✂️ - What is one of your OC’s worst memories? i also haven't really thought about this 😭

🧊 - Is their current design the first one? oh not at all. sting went through a few changes. general idea has always been the same but his "hair", mouth, markings, and clothes changed throughout the design process. i actually plan on making a separate post detailing all the the thought i put into his design! i'll add the link here (if i remember)

🍀 - What originally inspired the OC? i saw @/beehunterkisser's sonic bug designs and i was Majorly inspired by them. i Had to make a bug. sting was one of the results. i went with a scorpion because scorpions are Really Cool

🌂 - What genre do they belong in? i've imagined him being in the games/idw comics verse! i do want to make my fanstory into a fancomic one day 👉👈

💚 - What is your OC’s gender identity and sexuality? he doesn't really use labels to describe his gender or his sexuality, whatever happens happens. he uses he/him pronouns and that's all you really need to know

🙌 - How many sibling does your OC have? he has no idea! he doesn't talk to family

🍎 - What is the OC’s relationship w/their parents like? non-existent

🧠 - What do you like most about the OC? oogh...i gotta say his design. i really popped off tbh. other than that i think he's got fun interactions with the sonic cast and i like his personality! unfortunately the interactions only really exist in my head

✏️ - How often do you draw/write about the OC? relatively often tbh!! i usually draw him fighting sonic. i was in the process of writing a fight scene but writing fights are hard and i struggle a lot with writing ehehe ^^;; a lot of this stuff isn't posted because i am Shy™

💎 - Do you ever see yourself killing off the OC? oh god no

💀 - Does your OC have any phobias? he's got acrophobia! keep 👏 him 👏 on 👏 the 👏 ground 👏

🍩 - Who is your OC’s arch-nemesis or rival? he doesn't have one tbqh! he doesn't really feel strongly against anyone

🎓 - How long have you had the OC? i wanna say late april-early may? that's around when he was first concepted iirc!

🍥 - What age were you when you created the OC? 22! the age i am as of making this

#cosmic chatter #text #sting the scorpion #sonic oc showdown 2 #sonic oc #my art #doodles #my ocs #WHEW #i will figure out how to draw my boy at diff angles #either way enjoy some info abt sting! #taz is another one of my ocs. if you follow me you mightve seen her

[boopiddyboop]

Park Seonghwa Natal Chart Reading

Hello and welcome back to another episode of “Lady Boop analyzes a chart with the gravitas of the back corner of a house party.” On today’s episode we have Seonghwa, soju, and….no cider. Lemme fix that, and then we’ll begin our lovely traipse into Demon Line Member #2. I’m super excited for this reading considering I also have strong Aries placements, but have a very different vibe. Why are we so different, stars? Inquiring minds (just me) are wondering.

Full Disclaimer: Most of my knowledge is by traditional astrology, which involves but is not limited to: using whole signs, excluding Uranus-Pluto for natal charts, different sign rulers, and different planetary interpretations.  Astrology is subjective by nature; I do not think my way is best, simply that this is the version of interpretation that makes the most sense to me. This is not a professional service, simply a hobby meant for entertainment purposes only.  Feel free to disagree with or question my conclusions.

Placements:

Sun: Aries - 10th house

Moon: Cancer - 1st house

Mercury: Aries - 10th house

Venus: Aquarius - 8th house

Mars: Aries - 10th house

Jupiter: Pisces - 9th house

Saturn: Aries - 10th house

Ascendant: Cancer

Midheaven: Aries - 10th house

North Node: Virgo - 3rd house

So when I look at charts, the first thing I’m scanning for is Strong Placements™ to give me a heads up on the main energies. When a chart's energy is all over the place, I tend to default to the chart ruler, but sometimes, there’s superseding energies. This… is not the case for Seonghwa. Or rather, he has two very strong situations going on. His Cancer Moon is sitting as his chart ruler in the first house, while he’s got a very strong Aries Stellium being ruled by a Mars in Aries. This is quite strongly masculine versus feminine energy competing for who’s gonna be on top. I don’t always fuck with decans (because honestly, astrology is already like funky math, and decans just give me a headache after a while), but I literally pulled them up to see if it helped me figured which was stronger. It didn’t. These two energies are neck and neck and it’s obvious when you spend longer than 30 seconds staring at him that he does both VERY well. Pretty Mommy versus Demon Line dancer. I don’t usually spring for androgynous types, but in his case it truly is more of a duality.

Also, speaking of interesting- no earth signs outside of a stray North Node, one rogue air sign sitting as his Venus. Passionate and emotional? Absolutely. Grounded and logical?.....ehhhhh. The Mars in Aries is giving him a lot of drive, so as to combat what could be a fanciful nature (and it’s helped along by being in the 10th house). His Jupiter is also sitting in Pisces, which is another sign in its ruler. Amazing. The universe really was like “this one does not work in half measures”. I do find it cute that his Jupiter is in the 9th house, and as an idol I want to immediately be like “Look at this success from other cultures; what an international star”, but honestly the 9th house rules so many things that we could yet be discovering all that entails 20 years from now. And with it trining his moon, it also points to his love of foreign cultures as well. 

Venus in Aquarius in the 8th house…eesh. Venus in Aquarius would point to interest in the more eccentric or unique, but it comes with the downside of bringing a detached quality to his relationships. It’s not a fall sign or in detriment, but the 8th house, while being in charge of the taboo or transformative, is also in charge of death and hidden things. Or other people’s money. Honestly, fuck reading this in a sad way, combined with that Jupiter in the 9th, I’m fully supporting the “Seonghwa should get a foreign sugar daddy” agenda. 

I’ve just fully derailed at this point…

I’ve talked about how Seonghwa’s Mars stellium in the 10th means that his work and persona are constraining a lot of his identity, a fact not helped by that Sun-Saturn conjunction as well. For all of his duality, I think Seonghwa would be the most interesting member of Ateez to meet “off the clock”, so to speak... If he ever got the chance to feel like he was actually off duty- especially with that Sun-Moon square. Poor baby. I don’t think the presented aspects of his personality are a lie, I just think he’s so bound by that Aries energy. Final verdict? I’m giving the edge to Mars energy being more prevalent. Might change my mind tomorrow. But here's this final gif supporting my decision:

#astrology #kpop astrology #ateez astrology #ateez #park seonghwa #seonghwa #seonghwa natal chart #seonghwa astrology #ateez seonghwa

[bwobgames]

Previous First

They reach the second floor

It's still as unsettling as ever

The clock ticks

"It's past 9, but the clock didn't chime. Is it broken?"

"Maybe it's for the best. It was really loud"

They see a girl get out of one of the rooms carrying various blankets.

"Hey! If that's for the blanket fort, then put them back. It's been canceled!"

"... Who are you"

"Ah, the scary judgmental stare of a teenager who's cooler than you, it should be considered a war tactic"

"I'm Detective Beebo, and this is my partner Detective Ángel, we would like to ask you some questions"

She looks at Ángel weirdly

"Are you-"

"I am sorry for interrupting, but please do not ask if we are cops. We are not cops. We are private detectives, and we do not associate with the police department "

"Yeah! We don't care about the law!"

"That is not what I said, and I'd like that misinformation to not be repeated anywhere else"

"Hehe"

"I see you opening twitter. Put that down"

"Fine, but I'll keep the hat for longer"

"Wha- you're not even wearing it! Give it back!"

"It's the price to pay for my silence"

"Are you guys done?"

"Ah! Yes, ahem, we wanted to ask you about your father, Mr. Coli"

"Do you happen to know anything about him? What might make him want to commit multiple crimes?"

"... Why are you asking?"

"Me?"

"Not you, you are Oliver Beebo, right?"

"Uh, I am. Have we met before?"

She ignores that and turns to Ángel

"Aren't you the guy who bought the comp-"

"YES! I BUY MANY THINGS HAHA, JUST A HOBBY FROM DETECTIVE WORK! HAH."

"But that doesn't really matter right now, yeah? This has nothing to do with that, so we don't have to talk about it"

"Wha- have THEY met before?

Did they have a fight over a last product on a supermarket or what"

"... I'll only talk to Beebo"

"What?"

"I have something to ask you"

"Wait, no! We asked first!"

"Please don't tell me Ángel has some sort of rivalry with a 17 year old girl"

"So? Are you really in a position to ask for anything, 'detective' Ángel?"

"Never mind, you are right, ladies first"

"Uh, so, you'll tell me? About your father?"

"Yes. In private"

Ángel does not look happy. He and the teen are exchanging nasty looks

"He has a rivalry with a 17 year old. Ah man, I already decided to keep him, so better get used to it, I guess"

"I guess we'll separate for a bit"

"Ah, yeah, it's fine"

"Um, were will you two be?"

"Well, she needs to out those blankets back, so, a room?"

"That's fine, don't try hearing from behind the door, you"

"Wh- I would never!"

"I'll just stay by the stairs.

That way, if anything happens, here or on the first floor, I can quickly check it out!"

"I'd prefer if you weren't alone"

"Don't worry, I know what I'm doing, and I can just call Vivi if I get lonely"

"... Alright, but be safe, okay? Don't you dare not be safe"

He looks a bit sad at that

"I will. Now go get that info from Miss moody teen over there"

"Die"

"Bye-bye to you too"

Oliver and Nadia enter one of the rooms, and there's not much difference between them, just window placement

She puts the blankets down

"So"

"You know me?"

"Yes, I've looked you up online"

"Oh, do you want to hire me?"

"Not quite, I need to know something from you"

"So do I, I've been told you know more about your father than others"

She gets quiet

"We can both get what we want"

"You're right"

"Then, let me ask you, Mr. Detective

Have you ever heard about

House anatomy"

#smiley face #part one of two #it is said that she took a lot of traits of her dad #detective beebo #creepy imagery #-> at the very end #dark photo of a bedroom with a shadow character in the middle

[sanguine-law]

your name::..I think it will be much better to know someone name than with a piece of paper same with yours.

Romantic or platonic?: platonic.

A night in or dinner out or an activity?: Hmm…Going for dinner seems good as some restaurants are quite good but doing other things cannot be bothering.

Ice cream or chocolate covered strawberries?:…I don’t really like sweetness, maybe strawberries but you can choose something else.

What's your perfect date?: date ? I never quite dated someone so i don’t have in made a ideal date something maybe don’t boring.

Would you cook for me?: I could.

Would you let me cook for you?:….rather not.

Can we make-out?: No.

Make out in private or in public?: again, no I don’t know you enough for doing such things as well than public affection in general isn’t in my liking.

Do you like to cuddle?: I don’t. (Liar)

Blankets or no blankets for cuddling?: Again im not a cuddly type so I don’t see why the question is relevant.

Couch or bed?:why….why does this mean ? Couch ? For tea or coffee ?

What are at least 3 hobbies of yours?:hmm…I like doing long walk in the woods, Playing Cello…and reading.

Tell me something about you no else knows:…It’s much better for you to know nothing.

Why do you want to be my valentine?: Maybe I found interesting and wanted to know more things about you…not for magic or your skills but what you are as a person in general.

What makes you a good Valentine?:…I don’t know. Im not someone affectionate. Maybe im more calm ? But it’s for you to tell.

"Oh, I'm not allowed any affection from you? On Saint Valentine's Day? How disappointing, little pup~ Such a sad application. And you aren't even willing to trust my ability to cook, I'm wounded!

"But if you just want to play a song on the cello, I could match. Viola, bass, even the harp if I use my fingers correctly.

"But my my, young vampire, you need to make it worth my time if you actually want me around."

#vampire

[hw2rosewar]

Helix Waltz 2: The Burning Roses CBT - Freddier CG Story

(MTL) Translation:

Kalia: Oh... Is this your taxidermy collection? Thank you for inviting me, Mr. Freddier. I see there are quite a few specimens of butterflies on the wall. They look very pretty!

Freddier: Despite the fact I was the one to send the invitation, you have yet to take your eyes off them.

K: It’s because they’re beautiful! The butterflies have their wings spread out, which seem to glow as if they’re breathing. They give the impression that they never died and will flap their wings at any moment to leave their glass box.

K: Did you do all of this? It’s remarkable! I didn’t expect you to have such a hobby...

F: In order to not tire of their long lives and lose their survival instinct, members of the Night Clan will find something to entertain themselves with. This is what I do to kill time. It’s fun to preserve life in such a way where it won’t fade with the passing of eons.

K: But Mr. Freddier, if I recall correctly, some of the butterflies here have long since disappeared... This purple crystal swallowtail went extinct a hundred years ago.

F: Indeed. At the time, humans recklessly began to take over the land, which made this species of butterfly lose its natural habitat and become extinct.

K: Thinking that these once beautiful creatures disappeared from the world for various reasons, as well as how the proof that they once existed can only be seen here... I can’t help but feel a little sad.

F: Life in this world is inherently short and fragile. It’s not a surprise such an ending occurred. They became specimens, but have also continued to live forever. Are you interested enough to try it yourself?

K: I am! But I don’t know how to do it. Will you be able to teach me?

F: Why not? You’re very curious about my work and regard them highly. I am honored to show you their charm. Miss Rovella, this way, please.

K: These butterflies in the bottle are motionless. Are they dead? Are you going to preserve them now?

F: Yes, that’s correct. You see, death makes butterflies fold their wings and curl up like human babies. All I have to do is make them spread open their wings as they once did in life.

F: Because making specimens is a process of returning the dead to their most natural state, it has to be done a certain way. Pierce the butterfly’s body with a pin and fix it onto the board. Then slowly unfurl its wings so they can be affixed.

F: However, you must be careful not to damage the butterfly’s body, especially its wings. If it’s damaged or the scales fall off, the specimen cannot be considered a perfect work of art.

K: Hmm...

F: What is it, Miss Rovella? Do you still feel uncertain?

K: It’s all right. I just think you’re taking this very seriously. It feels different.

F: Haha, am I not always like this? But today is a lot more interesting. You’re very focused when listening to me. It’s an expression that encourages people to talk more.

F: Well? Do you want to give it a try?

K: Yes! Let’s see. First, I should... (Recalling what Mr. Freddier said, I should insert the pin into the butterfly’s thorax...)

K: (...I-It’s more difficult than I imagined!) What—Mr. Freddier?

F: Before beautiful things, beginners inevitably hesitate. I shall help you hold the butterfly. Insert the pin here, at the center. Go ahead.

K: In the center... Like this? I think... I did it.

K: ...! (His hand is... on top of mine.)

F: Well done... Hmm?

K: Cough, it’s nothing. The pins need to be used...

K: !

K: (Ow... My finger hurts. Did I accidentally prick it? Wait, my wrist is being pulled toward...)

F: ...

K: Mr. Freddier?

F: You’re bleeding...

K: It’s just a minor injury. A bandage should be enough... Um, does my injury upset you?

F: It certainly does!

K: I understand you care about me, but you don’t need to hold my wrist so tightly, right?

F: ...

K: Your eyes look strange, and you’re still staring at my injury. Do you...

F: The innocent expression on your face troubles me, Miss Rovella. It’s difficult to hold back my desire for blood when you’re wounded.

K: You’re saying a Wing can’t control their thirst for blood?

F: This is different. You are a very special existence to me.

K: Cough, if you’re looking at me like that... Does that mean...

F: ...What should I do?

K: You have a dangerous look, don’t you think... Ah, the bandages? Where are...

F: Ha, it’s not gentleman-like to ignore a wounded noble lady.  Allow me to bandage your wound, lest you continue to test my restraint by wagging your injured finger in front of my eyes.

T/N: Done via machine translation. Translations are not 100% accurate.

#helix waltz #helix waltz 2 #helix waltz 2 rose war #helix waltz game #helix waltz 2 the burning roses

[hippiegoth97]

You're a Winner: A Gator Tillman x Reader One-Shot 18+ Minors DNI

A/N: Hey, everybody! Just wanted to pop in and say 'surprise'! I've been watching the Fargo series lately and Gator Tillman has captured my attention. I also want to shout out two people who indirectly influenced me into writing this. First, is @morning-rituals for planting the seeds of the particular dynamic I've written here. And second, is my fic bestie @xxbutdaddyilovehimxx, for encouraging me to branch outside of Stranger Things with my writing. I'm also from Minnesota and spent a lot of years in Fargo as well. So, I figured it would be fun to make a story that goes back to my roots, in a way. (I will say my one gripe with the show is the accents are WAY over-exaggerated, but it is what it is.) Anyway, enjoy this totally unannounced story! -hippie ❤️

Description: You're a sex worker who's been employed by Roy Tillman to service his son, Gator. You've been seeing the young man for many years now, and it seems this long-term arrangement has brought on deeper feelings for one another...

Warnings: swearing, smut, sex work, smoking, one use of f-slur and r-slur, oral sex, praise/degradation, mommy kink, spitting, slapping, distension, choking, overstimulation, age gap, protected sex, mentions of erectile dysfunction, mentions of abuse/violence, light angst, a little bit of fluff

You're a Winner

He's late, you think as you look at the clock in your trailer. It's nine-thirty on a Saturday night, and Gator Tillman is tardy for his weekly appointment. You cross your arms as you sit on your sofa, staring at the door to will the man's presence on your weather-beaten steps. You've got yourself all dolled-up and everything, wearing your best red and black lingerie set and matching sheer robe. You've got the bedroom all set up for the little brat. Fresh sheets, lit candles, condoms at the ready. The only thing that's missing is your client.

This little arrangement of yours has been going on for almost a decade. From the moment Gator turned eighteen, his father Roy insisted on enlisting you to 'make him into a man'. In his own words, the sheriff said 'I'm worried he's gonna turn into a fag. The kid has never brought a girl home. Not even under the pretense of studyin'.' Shit, you'd never seen a grown man so concerned with his own son's sex life before. But given your chosen profession, and what a  handsome young man Gator was, you agreed. For a hefty fee, of course. A kid like that was bound to come with a laundry list of hang-ups and deep-seated issues.

Nine years later, and Gator has essentially become your only client. You don't really need much more than what Roy gives you, and you're not the spring chicken you used to be. Forty ain't ancient, but it ain't all that youthful, either. But you're content in your work. You have your independence in self-employment, your cozy trailer, your cat, and any hobbies and small pleasures that suit your fancy. What else could you possibly want?

You suppose the only thing you want in this moment, is for the shitbird to darken your doorstep. This arrangement isn't something you begrudge, and it's not just because of the money. You enjoy your time with Gator, he's always very eager to see you. You've grown rather close over the years. You let him sit with you and talk about his day before you initiate anything. He seems to appreciate the companionship, you don't imagine he gets much love and attention at home. It's quite sad, honestly. But he never complains, not really. He just says how he feels about stuff, and you offer up some advice to lighten his mood.

A more crude reason as to why you like Gator so much, though, is because he's hung like a fuckin' horse. And once he built up a little stamina, hot damn, that boy can go round after round. You get just as much pleasure from these little meetings as he does, never left unsatisfied at the end of the night. An even more filthy revelation that comes from your trysts, is something rather scandalous. Something Roy Tillman would surely never approve of in a million years. Something that could probably tarnish the family name if it ever got out, hence a very strict 'verbal NDA' that consisted of a gun pointed to your head. The sheriff's not-so-precious little boy...has a mommy kink.

This kink was discovered by complete accident. You'd been seeing Gator for a couple of months already, having very fulfilling  —if not rather vanilla— sex. You let the young man use you as he liked, after showing him the basic moves. He was so adorably inexperienced when he was first brought to you, his big brown eyes begging you for help as the only touch he knew was from his own hand. But after you showed him the ropes, he took them and ran. Gator is honestly the best you've ever had, and it's only gotten better with time.

But everything changed on one fateful night. Gator was particularly sad, and he wanted to spend most of his session just laying in bed and having you hold him. His head was resting against your breasts, and you were stroking his hair and letting him cry it out. You cooed kind words to him, and waited to see if he'd be up for anything else. You didn't mind foregoing the mind-blowing sex, though. He was looking to you for comfort. You'd eventually said something to him that dried the tears up, and he lifted his head to look deep into your eyes. And he said 'thank you, mama' in the sweetest voice you'd ever heard.

He'd never called you that before, and it took both of you by surprise. His eyes went wide, cheeks burning bright red. He tried to apologize, or clarify himself, anything to keep you from thinking he was some kind of freak. But hearing him say it...it stirred something inside you that you didn't even know was there. You liked it, and you wanted him to say it again. After a dissecting discussion about where his 'slip' came from, it was decided. Your entire dynamic would change drastically, as would your lives.

"Sorry I'm late, mama. Had a few extra heads to bust today." Gator says casually, strolling right through your door and tracking in snow on his work boots. He sees you sitting with your arms crossed, giving him a very stern look. His eyes drift along your body for a moment, drawn in by the sexy lace covering the most beautiful parts of you.

"I oughtta bust yours for makin' me wait." You snip, nudging your head as a signal for him to kneel before you for forgiveness.

"I know." He sighs, getting on his camo-clad knees and crawling over to you. You spread your legs, letting him apologize in the way you've agreed upon for many years now. "I'm real sorry, mama." Gator drawls, gingerly lifting your ankle in his hand. He leans his head down to kiss your stockinged foot. His warm lips slowly work their way upwards along your shin, to your knee, stopping at your thigh. "Lemme make it up to you." He says softly, eyes meeting yours again.

"Take your gear off first. You're trackin' snow everywhere." You gently command.

"Yes, mama." Gator does as you ask, sitting on the floor and untying his boots. He sets them neatly to the side, and takes off his holster, coat, and vest. He returns to his spot between your legs once he's stripped away the part of him that exists outside of your home. He allows his mind to slip into the place you've built just for him. Where there's no senseless violence, no one to tell him how stupid or useless he is, no self-loathing or insecurity. When he's here, he gets to feel good. You make him feel good. You administer his earned punishments with love, and with that love comes the strength he needs to carry on in the big bad world outside. You make him feel like a winner.

"Good boy, Gator. Doesn't that feel better?" You ask, noticing his demeanor has changed. It always does once you get things going. That douchey 'I am the law' attitude melts away like snow in spring, and he blossoms into a sweet, submissive little flower before you. Ripe for the picking.

"Yes. Much better." He smiles and nods, raising his hands to rest on your thighs. "Can I touch you now? Please, mama?" He pleads, growing rather desperate to taste you on his tongue. He's been thinking about you all day. Your sweet, succulent pussy is like nothing on this earth. Not even the most cavity-inducing flavors of his vape juice can compare.

"You may." You reply simply, shrugging your shoulders. Gator caresses your flesh, his hands still cold from the Lehigh winter air. But he quickly warms up as he continues to stroke you. He goes for the hem of your panties, looping his fingers around the fabric. You lift your hips up to help him as he slides them down. He takes his time, dragging the lace down to your feet before removing them altogether. You scoot yourself closer to the edge of the couch, spreading your legs open wide.

"Fuck, been thinkin' about this all day." Gator groans at the sight of your slick folds glistening in the dim lighting. Even though he's seen your cunt over four hundred times, it still drives him wild to see it every Saturday night. He craves it, dreams about it. All other women have been ruined for him at this point. It's not like you're actually dating or something, you're just his paid whore. But any attempts he's made to take a gal out on the town and make a move, they all fall flat. Those girls may be younger, and prettier than you, with bigger, perkier tits than yours. Nevertheless, he can't even pretend to enjoy their company. Because they're not you.

"Yeah? Did you miss mama's pussy, baby?" You ask, biting your lip at the spellbound look on his face. Even after all these years, he's still so taken by you. It makes you wonder, if this means far more to him than what your job description calls for.

"So, so much..." He nods and whimpers with need, licking his lips as he leans in closer between your legs. Your very center calls to him, the ambrosial scent emanating from it making his mouth water. Gator gently lifts your legs to sling them over his shoulders. The increasing body heat inside his sweatshirt radiates through to your flesh.

You patiently wait for him to take his first lick, admiring the way his breath stutters, and his pupils dilating with lust. His eyes drift closed as he goes in for the kill, planting his soft lips to your clit. "Mmm." You give an encouraging hum, letting your body fully relax against the sofa. You're gonna enjoy this. His tongue drags up and down along your slit lazily, gathering your wetness and spreading it all around. He's barely started, but it already feels amazing.

Gator takes his time, letting out little moans with every drop of your arousal landing on his tongue. "Tastes so good, mama." He pants. 

"Only the best for my sweet boy." You coo to him, stroking your hand along his slicked hair. He melts between your thighs even further, licking and sucking on all your favorite places. "You're doing such a good job, Gator. You've got a fuckin' perfect mouth." You praise, unable to resist rolling your hips to meet his movements. You cradle the back of his head to keep him in place, the stubble from his semi-buzzed cut tickling your flesh.

Pleasure builds within your belly, a roaring fire growing higher and hotter by the second. Gator's mouth continues to work on you, your satisfied moans encouraging him to keep it up. Your pelvis grinds into his face over and over, his hands supporting the small of your back to assist you. He loves it when you fuck his face, making it so you're the only thing he can see, smell, or taste. His cock is straining inside his pants, aching to get out and have some attention of its own. He wants so badly to take it out and stroke it in his own hand, or even dry-hump the couch to get some kind of friction. But he knows better. He only gets to feel good when you say so.

"Gettin' close, honey. Don't stop." You moan as you near the edge. Gator's pace quickens just a little, and he adds more pressure with his tongue. "Fuck, just like that." You gasp, nails digging into the back of his head.

"Mmm." He grunts at the sting, his cock twitching and leaking a few drops of precum into his boxers. He can't wait to taste your release on his tongue, his mind swirling with the memory of how gorgeous your face looks when you cum. Anticipation grows in you both, making the air in the room grow thinner. Gator's mouth goes into overdrive, pulling out every move you've ever shown him to try to make you lose it. Helpless moans flee your lips at his ravenous tactics, your free hand gripping the edge of the couch for dear life. "Please, mama. Please cum on my face." Gator begs, his words somewhat muffled between your thighs. But his whiney tone comes through all the same, and it's more than enough to bring your orgasm crashing down on you.

"Fuck!" You cry out, thighs trembling as pleasure courses through you mercilessly. Your legs clamp closed, trapping Gator's head against your pussy. He doesn't seem to mind, far too focused on drinking up every last drop of you. Your pelvis rolls unsteadily into him while you ride this out, your lungs on fire from breathing so hard.

"Mmm." Gator hums into your folds, swiping his tongue along your slit to clean up the beautiful mess you've made. All you can do is sit half-slumped against the couch until he stops, completely consumed in a thick cloud of euphoria. He pulls away after what feels like a welcome eternity, meeting your glazed-over eyes. A satisfied smile plays on his shiny lips, and his hands carefully lower your boneless legs from his shoulders. "Am I forgiven, mama?" He asks, sitting patiently on his knees for your approval.

"Yes, baby. I forgive you." You return his smile, lifting your legs up on the couch to lie down for a moment. You're gonna need some time to recover after that. "Uff-da! You really rocked my world this time, Gator." You say as you stretch your body out a little, a few joints clicking beneath your skin causing you to groan. Shit,I'm gettin' too old for this. You reach behind your head for your pack of cigarettes on the end table, bringing it to your chest to open it and take out a smoke along with your lighter.

"You're not too tired to fuck me, right?" Gator asks, pulling out his vape from his pants pocket. He's about to bring it to his lips, when you smack his hand.

"Don't do that in here. I hate that fruity fuckin' cotton candy bullshit." You chide him, and he slips the device back into his pocket.

"Sorry. Can I have a smoke, then?" He asks sheepishly, cheeks burning in shame.

"You betcha. Here." You hold the pack open for him to take a cig, lighting it for him before doing so with your own. "And to answer your first question, no, I'm not too tired. I just need a minute. And then we'll have some more fun. Okay, baby?" You end nicely, realizing you've come off a bit grumpy with him. Of course, you're meant to be stern and 'in charge' within this dynamic. But you don't want to be mean if it's not intended to derive pleasure. Gator doesn't need another bully.

"Okay." His smile returns, and he gets up to sit on the edge of the couch to be closer to you. He takes a long drag of his cig, his nose scrunching momentarily at the bitter taste. He used to smoke all the time, multiple packs a day to wear away at the stress that comes with being the sheriff's son. But once vaping became a thing, he jumped at the chance to taste something other than harsh tobacco. He figured he'd smell a little better, too. It's safe to say Roy wasn't too pleased, saying it 'made him look like more of a pussy than he already is'. So, the habit is maintained out of spite as well as inescapable nicotine addiction.

"Whatcha thinkin' about?" You ask, noticing he's looking rather stressed. Something seems to have pulled him out of the comforting sub-space he usually resides in with you.

"Nothin'. Just been a long day." He forces a smile, brushing the negative thoughts away. He doesn't want to entertain them right now. Or burden you with them.

"If you say so. But you know you can always talk to me, honey. I may be a whore, but that doesn't mean I don't care about you." You say kindly, placing a hand on his thigh as you continue to smoke. He nods to affirm your statement, taking another drag. "Did you want a drink or somethin'?" You offer.

"Nah, I'm alright. Maybe later." He replies, leaning over to stub out his smoke in the ashtray. "Can I kiss you?" He asks politely.

"Someone's impatient today." You chuckle, exhaling a cloud of smoke and putting your own butt out next to his. "C'mere." You beckon him closer with your finger, giving him permission to shower you with affection. You love the way Gator kisses you, so eager and attentive. His lips are so damn soft, despite spending hours outdoors in the chapped air every day. And his wandering hands know where and when to touch you at all the right moments. His palms tenderly worship your flesh wherever they may land, never failing to make you melt in his touch.

Gator climbs over you, his knees on either side of your own. He takes a moment to admire your face, the flush of your cheeks, your skin glistening with a light sheen of sweat. "You're so fuckin' beautiful." He says softly, lowering his lips to press against yours. It doesn't take long for his tongue to find its way into your mouth, tangling hungrily with your own. Your hands reach up to cup his face, keeping him close so he won't pull away. He tastes like green apples and tobacco, a flavor combination you never thought you'd enjoy so much. His own hands run along your sides, setting your skin on fire. He travels upwards, settling on your clothed tits. He gently massages them, swallowing the moans he draws from you.

"Gator..." You breathe against his lips, wrapping your legs around his waist to pull him down closer. His sizeable bulge meets your bare cunt, and he grinds into you out of impulse.

"Shit— Sorry, mama." He quickly apologizes, realizing he didn't get permission to do that.

"S'okay. Just don't do it again." You pant out a reply as you feverishly devour his mouth with your own. He nods, closing his eyes to settle into the rhythm again. You keep kissing until your lips start to go numb, pulling apart with shuddering breaths. "Let's take this to bed, baby." You coo to him.

Without another word, Gator lifts you off the couch and into his arms. He supports your ass in his hands, and your arms wrap around his broad shoulders to hang on tight. He carries you down the narrow hallway to your bedroom. You're surprised to find none of the candles have managed to set the trailer on fire, having forgotten you'd left them burning unattended for so long. Gator carefully lays you down on the bed, standing upright to start taking off his clothes. He knows the drill. Once you're in here, everything comes off. You remove your robe and bra, tossing them off to the side. You also do away with your stockings and the garter belt holding them up, leaving your body on full display for him.

You watch on intently as Gator's sweater is shucked from his torso, revealing his thick chest hair and toned muscles. He definitely works out a lot, you're sure he has to in order to 'bust heads' every day. He doesn't look like a body builder or anything like that, but his physique is still quite impressive. So firm and tight, bulging in all the right places. Next goes the pants, some truly ugly camouflage things with way too many pockets. But what lies underneath is 100% Certified All-American Beef. His thighs are thick enough to crush a watermelon, not that you've tested that assumption. A massive tent has formed in his black boxers, a damp mess of precum seeping into the fabric. He slips the thin material down from his hips, allowing his enormous cock to slap against his stomach.

"Fuckin'-A." You mutter under your breath. You'll never get over how huge he is, no matter how many times you see his dick. Eleven heavenly inches that reach every single nook and cranny of your cunt. He's got a nice curve and some decent girth to him, too. You know you're gonna be feeling it tomorrow, and the next day, maybe even the day after that. That's what you're counting on. "Stand next to the bed, baby." You order.

"Yes, mama." Gator assumes the position, and you get off the bed to go to him. You set a cushion on the floor, kneeling on it before taking his cock in your hand. "Fuck." Gator gasps at you finally touching him.

"Oh, you naughty boy. Look what a mess you're making already." You tut, drawing his eyes to look at his tip. It's engorged and red, a sticky blob of pre-release in the slit. "I'd better clean you up." You smirk, bringing your tongue to his head to lick the fluid away.

"S-sorry...didn't mean to— fuck." He's cut off from his apology when you take as much of him as you can fit inside your mouth. He's a little more than halfway in before he reaches your throat, and you use your hand to stroke the rest. Gator groans at your hot, wet mouth encapsulating him. He wants so badly to push you down further, or buck his hips into you. But he won't. He can't. If he does, you'll throw him out in the snow. Besides, he knows how well you take care of him. He'll get everything he wants, as long as he behaves. And you certainly make that easy to do. "Feels so good, mama." Gator moans, his fists balling at his sides to resist any disobedient urges.

You draw off of his cock for a moment. "Yeah? You gonna be a good boy and stay still for me?" You ask, flicking your dominating eyes up at him.

"Yes. Yes, I'll be so good for you. Please don't stop." He whines, the sound sending a flare between your legs. There's something about having such a masculine man begging you to touch him that makes you feel powerful. It's intoxicating.

"I hope so. I'd hate to have to punish you, honey." You reply, taking him back in your mouth. You bob your head up and down along his length, your hand gently pulling and twisting the excess. Your tongue swirls around him as you suck, stealing the most pathetic little groans and swears from his lungs. You keep going just like this for a good while, the slurping sounds of your mouth on him filling the room along with his moans.

Gator's eyes are glued to the sight of his cock disappearing inside your head. You're a master at blowjobs, although he doesn't have much to compare it to. As it's been said before, he's tried with other women. But he just can't quite...get there. Sometimes he can't even get fully hard, which is kind of embarrassing for him. The girls never make him feel bad about it, assuming it's their fault. And it isn't exactly untrue. They just can't satisfy him the way you can. It does worry him sometimes, that he may never be able to move on from you.

"You're in your head again, Gator." You pull away, giving him a questioning look. "What's wrong?" You ask, still pumping him in your hand.

"I'm sorry." He sighs, rolling his eyes at himself. He's ruining this. The one thing he looks forward to all fucking week. "Can we talk about it after?" He asks. You're about to protest, but he insists you keep going. "I promise, I'll focus. Please?" He pleads, eyes watering in frustration. Don't fuckin' cry, idiot, he mentally scolds himself. He sniffs harshly, thinking about anything else.

"You sure?" You ask again, needing to know he's completely on board for you to continue. You search his eyes for the truth, to figure out what's bothering him so much. It's unfortunate you don't have the ability to read minds.

"I'm sure. I want you, I need you." Gator replies enthusiastically, forgetting all about his troubles again. All it takes is you actually giving a shit to pull him back into the warm blanket of safety you've crafted for him.

"Okay. Just let me know if you change your mind." You resume giving him head, speeding up a little to lead him even further away from his unpleasant thoughts.

"God— fuck." He grunts, already getting close. He was pretty far along until you stopped, and your increased pace has helped catch him up significantly. You bring your free hand to his balls, firmly massaging them to push him further. His nails dig into his own thighs as he gets closer and closer. "'M almost there, mama. Can I cum?" He asks with need. His stomach is threatening to tense up any second now. Gator's eyes watch and wait for you to give him some signal of permission, heart pounding in his chest as he holds himself right on the edge. "Please, please, please..." He mutters repeatedly, wanting so badly to let go. After what feels like forever, you nod to give him the go-ahead. "Oh, god...gonna cum— fuck, fuck, fuck!" He murmurs in a pitched tone, toes curling as his high courses through him. His brows furrow, and his mouth falls open to let out a load groan. His hips stutter slightly, and you feel his sticky load spilling inside your mouth. You swallow most of it, saving a little bit in your cheek once he calms down. You pull yourself away, and gently lead him to sit on the bed.

"Look at me, baby." You say softly, though he's still in a daze. You grab hold of his chin, lifting his face to make him pay attention. He gasps quietly in surprise, eyes widening. He's still coming down from his orgasm, his mind feeling fuzzy. "Open." You order. Gator does as you ask, his pretty lips parting in obedience. While still holding his chin, you straddle his lap. Your hand moves to cup his cheek, and you gaze deep into his fucked-out eyes as you spit the cum you'd saved into his mouth. He moans at the taste of his own release on his tongue, swallowing it hastily. "Good boy." You praise in a seductive tone, reaching between your bodies to grasp his softening cock.

"Shit." Gator hisses, feeling a little overstimulated. You start stroking him, trying to get him hard again. "Mama, please...too much." He whines, needing you to let him breathe.

"Shhh. You're a big boy, you can take it." You coo, squeezing his dick a little to make his eyes roll back into his head. He groans, beginning to grow in your hand as the pain turns into intense pleasure. "See? Doesn't that feel good?" You ask darkly.

"Y-yeah." Gator nods, pulling you in for a starving kiss. He needs to touch you, to do something to occupy his hands or he might just go insane. He grabs your ass, leading you to grind your clit against the base of his cock. You whimper at the friction, ignoring his slight breaking of your rules. It just feels so good, you don't want him to stop. His lips travel all sorts of places as you keep riling each other up for round two. He kisses your neck, your tits, your shoulders, nipping and sucking your skin. He leaves reckless hickeys in his wake. Everything he's doing is making you wetter by the second. You need him now, you can't wait any more.

"You wanna be inside me now, baby?" You ask, rubbing circles on his throbbing tip with your thumb. He's at a loss for words, only able to nod as his mouth continues to attack your skin. "You have to let me get a condom, Gator." You giggle at his lack of control.

"Sorry." He immediately stops everything he's been doing, his hands falling to his sides.

"It's okay. But I'm not always gonna be so forgiving." You warn as you climb off of his lap. You go for the bedside table, taking one of the condoms from the bowl sitting on top of it.

"I know." Gator responds quietly. You come back over to him a moment later, already holding the opened condom in your hand. You gently place the ballooned end on his tip, rolling the latex down his ample length. "Fuck." He mutters, still very sensitive.

"Is this position okay?" You ask, hoping he says 'yes'.

"Yeah." He answers. You straddle his lap again, one hand on his shoulder while the other takes hold of his cock. You drag him slowly along your folds, slick sounds emitting from between your legs.

"You hear that, honey? Listento how wet you've made me." You say through a moan.

"Mama...please, fuck me. I want your pussy so bad." Gator begs, almost on the verge of tears. His thighs keep twitching, and he can't stop making the most pathetic noises as you tease him.

"You promise to be a good boy? To follow the rules?" You ask, needing to hear him say it.

"I promise, just— please!" He pleads, his voice breaking as he can't take much more of this torture.

"Alright. Just calm down, baby. Breathe." You speak gently, holding him still against your entrance. His eyes meet yours again, and he does as you tell him. He slows down his breathing, forcing himself to relax. His chest rises and falls slowly, his heart ceasing to race. "There ya go." You give him a small kiss as a reward before moving things along. You carefully lead yourself downwards onto his dick, the air knocked out of your lungs as you do so.

"Jesus..." Gator's head falls back at the sensation of your tight pussy taking him all in. You keep going until he's fully sheathed inside you, his tip pressing firmly against your cervix. Your walls clench around him, low moans escaping you both.

"Mmm, that's my big boy." You chuckle in satisfaction. You feel so wonderfully full inside, you swear his cock is in your stomach. You take hold of Gator's hand, bringing it to your lower belly. You press his palm into your flesh, wanting him to feel the bulge his cock has formed inside you. "You feel that, baby?" You ask, drawing his eyes to yours. He'd been squeezing them shut before at the sensation of your cunt swallowing him up.

"Yeah." He barely exhales the word, his dick twitching at this discovery. He gently feels around the subtle protrusion on your stomach, curiosity getting the best of him.

"You like that? Knowing you fill me up so well?" You keep up the questions, smirking at the look of wonder on Gator's handsome face. He nods in reply, pressing two fingers on the bulge to see if anything happens. A quiet moan comes out of you in response, as the area he pushed has managed to stimulate your g-spot from the outside. In all your years of whoring, you've never felt anything like it. "Do that again." You order, and he does. The sensation returns, making your thighs clench. "Holy shit, Gator. I don't know why, but that feels so fuckin' good." You chuckle breathlessly, unable to believe you're just now finding this out.

"Should I keep doing it?" Gator asks, very excited that he's managed to surprise you after all the time you've spent together.

"You can near the end, baby." His face falls when you tell him to wait, his hand taking its usual place on your hip. You grab hold of his chin again, much rougher this time. "Don't be a brat." You warn, bringing your lips closer to his. "I know you're excited, honey. But you have to wait. You can do that for me, can't you?" Your tone toes the line between sweet and teasing, with a dash of danger to tell him you mean business.

"Yes, mama. I can wait." Gator answers agreeably, though he hopes you'll actually start riding him soon.

"Good boy." You coo, giving him a tender kiss. You let go of his face, placing your hands on his shoulders for leverage. You slowly lift yourself up, carefully sinking back down again. You repeat this action a few times, easing yourself into a steady pace on Gator's cock. It's best to ease into it given his ample size, you'd hate to end up hurting yourself.

"Need more...Y/N, please..." Gator whines, his hands gripping your hips so tight.

*SMACK*

You give him a hard slap across the face for using your real name. "Don't call me that." You cease your lazy bounces, wrapping your hand around the thickness of his throat. You give him a rough squeeze, cutting off his oxygen. Your eyes burn into his, and a subtle redness is spreading on his left cheek. "What's my name, baby?" You ask, expecting him to address you properly.

"Mama." He chokes the word out, growing even more aroused at you doling out his punishment. The sting on his face and the clog around his throat are going straight to his cock.

"That's right." You nod, returning your hand to his shoulder. "Now, no more funny business. You sit still, and do as I tell you. Got it?"

"Yes, mama." Gator answers, dying to feel you bouncing on him again. He's so hard it hurts, you didn't give him any time to collect himself earlier. And now, every twist or clench you make could set him off like a motherfucking pipe bomb.

You don't say anything else, going back to warming yourself up. You take hold of Gator's hands, bringing them up to massage your breasts as you move. It'll give him something to do, surely he's grown extremely impatient at this point. He gladly accepts the task, rolling your nipples between his fingers as he squeezes your tits with his over-sized palms. "Good boy, that's it, play with mama's titties." You praise, picking up speed a little. Breathy moans fill the air as you move, his dick squishing into your sweetspot every time you land on him. You've still got a long ways to go, and you have no problems taking the scenic route, so to speak.

The same can't be said for Gator, however. He's a complete mess beneath you already. His thighs are quaking, his hips threatening to pitch up off the bed. Thoughtless noises and swears fall out of his plump lips, his brows drawn together in a downward scrunch. It's taking everything in him and more to focus on juggling your boobs in his hands. Your cunt glides up and down his shaft with pointed precision, letting him feel every ridge and divot inside you through the condom.

"You're doin' so well for me, honey. Takin' this pussy so good. How's it feel, baby?" You ask, going even faster in his lap. Your thighs and joints are telling you to do otherwise, they're starting to burn and stiffen from the work they've done already.

"Feels s-so good— fuck. I love your pussy, mama, 's so hot and tight." Gator groans, trying so hard to keep from thrusting his pelvis. He wants so badly to flip you over and fuck you senseless, to slam his aching cock into you over and over until you're crying. Sometimes you let him do that if he's really good, and he's praying to the Lord Almighty that this will be one of those times.

"You wanna help me out, baby? I'm runnin' outta steam here." You huff, feeling the need to switch positions now. You thought you could soldier on keep this up, but apparently not.

"Yes, please." He replies excitedly, grabbing hold of your hips again. You still yourself, moving your legs from their straddling position to instead spread forward onto the mattress. You sigh in relief at the new angle taking the pressure off your knees.

"Go ahead, honey. Knock yourself out." You give Gator a warm smile, waiting for him to take the lead. He starts off nice and gentle, not wanting to give you too much too quickly. "Mmm, just like that. Pace yourself, baby." You speak softly, encouraging him. His hips lightly smack into you as he moves, his firm grip holding you safely in place. He speeds up a bit, stealing your breath away as his tip pierces deep within your cunt. "Fuck." You gasp, your orgasm building steadily.

"Can I go faster, mama? I wanna make you feel good." Gator asks sweetly, gazing at you with adoring eyes.

"Yes, please do." You reply, hoping he holds nothing back. In your efforts to tease him, you've been driving yourself crazy. You're unbelievably turned on, desperate to get the pleasure you crave. Gator snaps his hips upwards, setting a far more punishing pace now. "Fuck, baby..." You whimper, tightening your grip on his shoulders. Your head falls forward to nuzzle into his neck as you hang on. Your body jiggles at the force of his thrusts, loud moans and slaps of sweat-soaked skin filling the room.

"Mama..." Gator forces the word out, barely able to think as he pounds your perfect pussy. You lift your head up to see what he needs, his lust-blown eyes finding your own. "Hit me." He murmurs, wanting to feel the stinging slap of your hand across his flesh.

*SMACK*

Your palm cracks against his cheek, ripping a vulgar sound from his lungs. You find it a bit odd that he enjoys being slapped so much. You've heard all about the beatings he's recieved at the hand of his father. But you suppose this is his way of reclaiming the pain, by turning it into pleasure instead. You've never questioned it verbally, you'd hate for him to feel judged by you. You're his safe-haven, his salvation. You're here to give him what he wants, what he needs. Because no one else will.

"Again." He huffs, needing more. He continues to fuck you mercilessly, bringing you both nearer to the edge.

*SMACK*

"Fuck." He groans at the stinging warmth spreading along his skin. "More." He says, his eyes beginning to water.

*SMACK*

As much as it confounds you, it would be dishonest to say you don't gain anything from inflicting pain on the young man beneath you. As the self-proclaimed 'best hooker in Lehigh', you take pride in what you do. The way Gator's skin flushes to an angry red after every blow, and the noises he makes in response excites you beyond compare.

"Had enough, honey? I'd hate to leave a bruise." You ask, though the words come out a bit messy as he's kept up his jackhammering this whole time.

"Choke me. I'm gettin' close." Gator begs, taking your caution to heart. He'd hate to have to explain another 'bar brawl' to his father if he lets you go ham again.

"So am I, baby. You're fuckin' me so good with this massive cock of yours." You give him what he desires, wrapping your hand around his neck. You squeeze the sides of his throat, making his head feel light. His mouth falls open, struggling for breath. His fingers dig deep onto your hips, and he manages to fuck into you even harder and faster than before. "Oh god, Gator, you're gonna make me cum..." You moan as your high rapidly approaches. Your insides are beginning to flutter, your toes preparing to curl any moment now. You loosen your grip on his throat to let him breathe again. You grab hold of his right hand, quickly bringing it to the bulge his dick makes within your belly with every stroke. "P-press down, honey. Make me cum, make mama feel good." You frantically order him, helping him find the spot.

"Cum on my cock, mama. I wanna feel you." Gator groans, about to tip over the edge himself. His eyes fall to the area you've shown him, watching as the lump appears and disappears rapidly. He pushes down on the pudgy flesh, making you squeal.

"Yes! Just like that, don't stop!" You cry, so unbelievably close. The sensation grows and wanes with every pump of his dick inside your cunt, building and building as he continues to press your stomach with his fingers. You can feel the knot inside you about to snap, squeezing Gator's throat one last time to make him lose control alongside you.

"Mama, f-uck..." He chokes as he reaches his peak, his entire body trembling with pleasure. His hips buck wildly against you, his eyes rolling back into his skull. He doesn't stop pushing the bulge in your belly, and his aimless thrusting sends you head-on into your own orgasm.

"Gonna cum, I— oh, fuck!" You almost scream as blinding white heat consumes you. Your walls clamp down around his cock, and you cum harder than you ever have before. A hot, wet mess spills between your thighs, running down Gator's legs towards the carpet. You collapse into his arms, unable to keep yourself upright. Ungodly noises roll out of your mouth, landing haphazardly in the humid air of the room.

Gator's arms wrap around your middle as you both come down from your highs, your hearts pounding in sync after yet another mind-blowing Saturday night. Once you catch your breath, you carefully remove yourself from his softening length and he ties off the condom before throwing it away. He leaves the room for a minute, coming back with a damp cloth to clean you up with and a tall glass of water. He retrieves these things for you every time as part of the terms you'd established in this 'relationship' of yours.

Once he wipes you clean, he helps you get under the covers. He puts his boxers back on, and joins you. You sip at your water, setting the glass on the night table when you're satisfied for the time being. "So, spill. What's on your mind, baby?" You ask, breaking the long, comfortable silence you'd been sharing.

"I...I dunno. It feels a bit retarded now." Gator sighs, shrugging.

"I'm sure it isn't. C'mon, talk to me. You promised." You speak softly, running your fingers along his bare bicep to coax him into talking.

He turns his head to look at you, finding nothing but kind eyes and an even kinder smile waiting for him. "Alright. Just...don't laugh. Or take it too seriously, or whatever." He rambles. You give him a silent nod, waiting to hear him spill his guts. "I was just thinkin' about our time together. I really like ya, and what we have. I know it's just sex, and it's your job. But it means a lot to me, and...I've been findin' it hard to...perform with other women." He says, watching your expression with every word. He's waiting for you to laugh at him, or tell him he's crazy, or...he isn't really sure at this point.

"Uh..." You trail off, unsure what to say. You certainly weren'texpecting to hear anything like this today. You'd assumed Gator was just going to tell you about what a dick his father is again. That's what he usually talks about. He's never even brought up 'other women' before, probably thinking it would be rude.

"Well?" He asks, needing some kind of response from you. Every second that passes with you just blankly staring at him makes him want to run and hide.

"Sorry. I'm just surprised, I guess." You start. "So, what are you sayin', exactly? You 'like' me? In what way?" You ask, needing some clarification here. Because from the sounds of it, he wants far more from you than just raunchy sex once a week.

"I mean...shit. I dunno. I think maybe I...love you?" He says it like it's a question. Perhaps it is. After all, Gator knows next to nothing about love. He's been raised on hatred and violence. How the hell could he know love, even if it bit him on the ass?

"Oh, Gator. Honey..." You tut, about to try to tell him he can't possibly love you. You're his prostitute, for fuck's sake.

"I know it sounds crazy, okay?!" He cuts you off, almost shouting. You flinch at his volume, and he sighs again. He softens his voice, he doesn't want to scare you, or make you think he'd hurt you. He would never do that. "Look, I just— I've tried goin' out with other girls, tried to form a real relationship, and it never feels right. Not like it does with you. I don't expect you to think of me that way, I get it. I'm just a job. That's fine." He says, knowing full well you couldn't possibly feel the same way. He's just a dumb brat that his father pays you to fuck. How can you possibly form any sense of affection for him in this kind of arrangement?

"But you make me happier than I ever thought I could be. You're the one thing I got goin' for me. I look forward to seein' ya every week. You're the most beautiful, kind, amazing person I've ever met. You make me feel good, you make me feel loved. You make me feel like a winner." He speaks emphatically, meaning every goddamn word. He feels like a madman even saying these things out loud. But they're the truth, and he could stand a good helping of that for once in his life.

"I care about you too, Gator. I enjoy our time together, and you're such a sweet young man. I know ya like to act all tough and shit, but you're capable of so much more than that. I'm just not sure 'love' is the right word here." You talk to him as gently as you can. You don't want to hurt his feelings. You yourself harbor strong feelings towards him, it didn't take long for them to develop. But you've always shoved it down, pretended this is all about sex. Hearing him say how he feels for you, though, it's dredged it all back up again. No one has ever made you feel as appreciated and beautiful as he has. The way he's always so happy to be around you, it makes you happy too.

"Then what is?" He asks in annoyance. "We've known each other for a long time, Y/N. You could've given up on me a long time ago, everybody else has. I know Roy's money must've added up by now, enough so you won't have to worry about anythin' ever again. Years ago." He doesn't even care that he's used your real name again. You have to hear this, every last word. Because when he really puts his mind to it, the money and the sex can't be the only reasons you keep seeing him.

"I-I suppose you're right. I've definitely never serviced anyone for years on end." You chuckle, drawing a small laugh from him as well. "And I agree that there is...something here. But, it's not like you can bring me home for dinner or somethin'."

"Oh, I would never do that." Gator scoffs, making you raise an eyebrow. "I couldn't put ya through a Tillman family meal like that. Fuck no!" He laughs again, and so do you.

"Alright, alright. Fair enough. And look, I ain't lookin' to be wedded off or nothin'. But I wouldn't say no to retiring, and lettin' you take me on a real date." You say excitedly, biting your lip. It's so funny, you feel like a schoolgirl again. You have a real chance to actually spend time with Gator in a personal capacity. Something that you never realized you wanted so much, until now.

"That's fine by me, mama. I'll take you anywhere ya want." Gator grins, completely over the moon that you want this as much as he does. Where this exploration will take you both, neither of you knows. But you're willing to try.

The end.

A/N: I hope you all enjoyed this story! It's definitely a one-off but I'm glad I challenged myself to try something new! -hippie ❤️

#writers on tumblr #fanfiction #smut #gator tillman #fargo season 5 #midwestern smut #uff da #all cops are bastards #even the hot ones #dommy mommy #mommy kink

[mllelaurel]

More Servant of the Shard

I’m about 40% of the way through, and on chapter 10. 

Cut for... honestly more rambling than spoilers. But maybe also spoilers, IDK. 

A little sad that the book hasn’t actually contained all that much Jarlaxle and Entreri interacting with one another so far, aside from the sparring scene in the beginning. One might even argue this book hasn’t contained much Jarlaxle period - his POV’s a bit sparse comparatively, and he’s thoroughly compromised by the titular shard so (probably I say, because I have not read other books,) doesn’t quite come off as his normal self. 

Now that I think about it, I wonder if part of the sparring scene’s point was to establish a baseline for both Jarlaxle’s character and his interaction with Entreri. He does, in fact, feel very Jarlaxle in that. So we read that scene, and it heightens how weird he’s acting later, and we miss Our Dude. 

On Entreri’s end, I rag on him a lot affectionately, and I especially rag on his quest for his own sketchy artifact to match Jarlaxle’s, but honestly? The book does a good job of selling me on why he wants and even needs Charon’s Claw. He’s surrounded by asshole mage and psionic drow who hate him. He feels deeply unsafe and is desperate for a safeguard. 

I find it really interesting, the way fear seems to be the primary driving emotion behind SO MANY things Entreri does. Like. He’d hate that with the fire of a thousand suns and sooner die than admit it, but it’s true. Even his thing with Drizzt can IMHO be fundamentally broken down thusly:

“If I’m the baddest bitch in the room, no one can ever hurt me again” is not a GREAT trauma coping mechanism, but it’s a great one to jump on if you’ve got a lot of pride in your fear soup. And it works for a long time, because he makes himself almost good enough. 

Meet Drizzt. Hello, Entreri. You are NOT the baddest bitch in the room. 

Oops, that coping mechanism was brittle and cracks right down the middle once contradicted. And somewhere deep in his psyche, under what he tells himself is cold rage, ya boy begins to panic. Because Drizzt’s very existence proves he’s NOT safe. He IS hurtable. And it literally does not matter to Entreri whether or not Drizzt himself is a threat. The cortisol in his brain just registers that Drizzt broke his safeguards (which was not Drizzt’s intent and also he’s not psychic) and proceeds to skip all other steps. 

Which results in him trying to kill a teenager repeatedly. GJ. 

Related to all of this, I kind of love that Drizzt has 100% run out of patience with Entreri, per his POV segment. He’s not a saint. He’s a nice enough guy to hope Entreri gets better hobbies and grows as a person, but if Jarlaxle stabs him? At least he won’t have to deal with Asshole Who Keeps Trying to Kill Him again. 

Drizzt’s POV seems on the whole pretty insightful as far as Jarlaxle is concerned. But then, there’s the honking Zak-shaped blindspot. “I don’t get how Jarlaxle can be close to my dad, but also THIS ASSHOLE.” To be fair, I don’t know if this is before or after Salvatore realized Zak and Entreri were huge character parallels and Jarlaxle had a mighty TYPE. But even if this was written after the realization, of course Drizzt would have a giant Zak-shaped blind spot. He loved his dad and lost him in a traumatic fashion (twice, even, I think.) Of course he wouldn’t put him in the same class as Mr. Murder Hobo over there. 

But to go back to Entreri for a second, there’s another interesting note to make. Underneath all the fear and pride, there is some tiny, squiggly something, reaching for some kind of squiggly light. Even beyond his fondness for Dwahvel, there’s his surprise and anger at Soulez for abandoning his daughter. His going out of his way to spare Marek. For all of his buried self-loathing, Entreri keeps having empathy for people who remind him of himself. Adhania as a child betrayed by a parent. Marek as another rogue pawn of the Bregan D’aerthe. It’s crumbs of empathy, sure. But those crumbs are there, even if he will spend paragraphs justifying how it’s totally not that, nope, nothing of the sort. 

I swear, my entire read of these books won’t be Let’s Play Psychoanalyze Artemis Fucking Entreri. 

Really. I mean it. 

What else have I forgotten to note?

The writing of women in these books so far? Not amazing; not as bad as I’d been led to believe, a gross scene early on aside. Dwahvel continues to be great. I don’t know what to think of Shalotta so far. She does have interiority, particularly when seen through Entreri’s eyes. He notes the fear and uncertainty under her cool facade. But as Dwahvel all but lampshaded, it’s hard to get a read on what she actually wants (aside from ‘not to die or be powerless,’ which can be inferred) and thus care. Also I feel like there are better ways to portray a female character who is power-driven and scheming than “sleeping with Jarlaxle and not accomplishing much.” 

Kimmuriel’s budding frienemyship? with an illithid is kind of cute if you squint, and will end so, so, SO badly. Also I love that here we have Jarlaxle and Entreri scrambling for sketchy bad idea artifacts, and Kimmuriel is like, nah, not good enough. Meet my sketchy bad idea dude. He’s the only one who understands me, for we are both psychic.  

Okay, I think that’s it for the moment.

#legend of drizzt

[fireemblems24]

Azure Gleam Ch 6

Dimitri fans stay winning. The only route where I actually feel the need to put spoilers in the title - at least for anyone who's played Three Houses.

STORY

Oh, wait, we DON'T fight at Arianrhod battle? Count Rowe falls off screen? Man, Edelgard taking Ls all over the place.

I love how Arianrhod is unconquorable but fell right away. Lamo.

Is Edelgard keeping Aruendel imprisoned? I thought she had no clue where he was.

Dimitri struggled with his revenge issue for a moment there.

Annette is so smol. 😭

The way Dimitri says "Imperial snake" with so much venom.

Someone came with terrible news. Count Rowe escaped. Should've just killed him.

Oh, wait, they got attacked by mages. That's TWSITD? And Dimitri knows they're behind Duscur? Suspecting Cornelia is behind it. Glad that we'll get to deal with her again. She's a great villain.

MAP & SIDE BATTLES

Mannnn between the hurricane, not having internet, and last week being a nightmare for work, it's been sooooo long since I played AG. I had most of GW Ch 6 done when the hurricane came through, so it really has been like 2, 3 weeks? (not that I'm complaining, the flooding is just getting even worse in some areas)

Ahhhhh, I'm always so happy when I remember Flayn and Seteth are on this map.

Man, thinking about Post-CF Flayn makes me so sad. Like I know some people think it's oh so great she and Seteth can live, but they'll spend the next few hundred years on the run, terrified to trust anyone with their true identity. And Flayn hates that. She wants to hang out with friends and go to school. The fact she gets that teased and gets tossed into an even worse way of life if she survives CF is so sad. And she has to see everyone celebrate Rhea's death and act like her race is responsible for human greed too.

Ingrid knew Miklain was abusing Sylvain 😭

Dimitri's no nonsense. He's like "if Miklain acts up, kill him" to the soldiers. Like, that's hardcore.

Mannnn, Sylvain is interesting here. He's supporting Dimitri's decision with Miklain I'm betting in no small part because he wants to undo the reliance on crests and knows Miklain could help that.

The bubble over Felix says "It really pisses me off." So Felix being Felix. Annnnd Felix is annoyed with Dimitri for not telling him everything. So more Felix talking about Dimitri, lamo.

Man, the Blue Lions are always so intense. Everyone here is talking about Miklain or Ashe finding a way to deal with Lonato's death or Duscur generals talking about murdered family. AG goes hard.

Ohhh, if Dedue trusts Duke Infan, than I do too.

I was right about Dimitri and Count Gloucester, he just admired Rowe for surrendering quickly and sparing the people.

I get to kill Count Varley. Cool.

Why does Dimitri know so much about which plants you can eat 😅

ASHE & DEDUE C SUPPORT

Ashe is such a cinnamon roll. He's already wandering around while it's late outside and stopped to pick some yarrow because of its healing properties.

Gardening bonding incoming. Ashe noticed Dedue's hobby.

They're both missing the greenhouse :(

Dedue wants to visit Lonato's garden. He also wants to know why Lonato knows so much about herbs. Good question.

Dedue's into medicinal herbs.

These two are too sweet 😊

FELIX & MERCEDES C SUPPORT

He better be nicer to her than last time. I'd love to see her chew him up, lol.

Ohhhh yesss, we're finally talking about Felix's cat thing. Felix really is a cat in human form.

Felix taking in injured stray cats 😭. Mercie and Jeritza did too 😭😭. And they had to hide it because they wouldn't killed it 😭

Mercie "We left my brother behind. Next sentence. "Still, I wonder what happened to that cat." 🤣 Jeritza found dead.

Cat is attached to Felix and won't leave. 🤣🤣🤣 People (and cats) ignoring Felix's being tsun is what I live for.

Mercie is like "quit whining, Felix. You have a pet cat now." lamo.

FELIX & SYLVAIN C SUPPORT

Oh, this time it's Sylvain calling Felix out for fighting reckless. It's a reverse uno from their Hopes' supports.

"You don't look like a man who's achieved some fantastic new enlightenment." Sylvain just slayed Felix.

Now they're arguing about who got in trouble more as kids. I love that, lol, makes them really feel like childhood friends.

Ten bucks says Felix got in the fight defending Sylvain's honor (or Dimitri's).

Sylvain's like you can't die because you mean too much to Faerghus and Dimitri. And then talks about how much Felix means to Dimitri.

Wait, wait, wait - important line here "reforming the entire social structure of pretty much everything . . ." Sylvain on Dimitri. Eat shit "StAtUs QuO dEfEnDeR" argument.

Soooo the "Sylvix" support so far is all about . . . Dimilix 😅

I don't mind this in the slightest, but I suspect someone on the writing team was a shipper on deck OR they were as sick as I am of people saying "CF Felix makes sense because he HaTeS dImItRi."

Felix throwing the same arguments at Sylvain. Good on him.

"You're the complete opposite of integrity." Felix, that's your friend 😭😭.

So Sylvain did some growing up it seems.

SHEZ & RODRIGUE C SUPPORT

Finally got Rodrigue's C support. Took long enough.

Shez complaining about the cold brings back memories lol. I used to live in the North.

Hearing her talk about lamp-lit streets covered in snow makes me miss winter sooooo badly.

Cool detail that messengers ride pegasus during the winter. I think someone mentioned that on here before.

Lamo, Dimitri and Felix followed a pegasus and nearly froze to death as kids. Poor Rodrigue.

Man, this is why the Blue Lions are the best. All these little stories from the past in the supports. Other houses don't get this.

SHEZ & DEDUE B SUPPORT

Shez looking out for Dedue. Good.

Soldiers giving Dedue shit 😭😭.

Shez can sympathize with the soldiers. Wtf. No way. I'm questioning them. (I could either agree with them or question them)

Dimitri put Dedue in a position often given to nobles. Good. Deserved.

Shez says she naturally get's under people's skin, and Dedue's just like "true." lamo.

Commoners bonding over the resentment nobility feels towards them for Dimitri elevating them.

I like how Shez's solution is to just prove themselves. It feels very shonen lead and like what Shez would say.

This was a good support balancing being about both characters.

FELIX & INGRID C SUPPORT

Nooooo, not Glenn 😭😭😭😭

Ingrid found a spur. It's Felix's, but actually Glenn's.

Ingrid's calling Felix out for being a softie for keeping hold of a memento.

And now he wants to give it to her 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 I'm actually tearing up in real life over this. I'm so over attached to this group.

Glenn told Ingrid before anyone else about his promotion 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

I was not expecting that support. That support needs a warning. How did that??

Felix being sweet is my weakness, though.

Not going to lie, sometimes going through support after support feels like a chore. But never with the Blue Lions lol.

SHEZ & SETETH C SUPPORT

Fodlan's #1 husbando support incoming.

Seteth thinks Shez could've impacted Fodlan's future if she continued to study at the Academy and it wasn't shut down.

Seteth admits he's suspicious of Shez. Which . . . I mean it's Seteth.

Man, every time someone doesn't trust Shez, it just makes me love Dimitri's take on her powers even more.

Seteth defending Rhea. You love to see it.

Lamo, he wants Shez to stay away from Flayn and Rhea.

What's funny about that is Shez doesn't have a C support with Flayn (B & A though), so it's almost like she listens until they're more familiar with each other. And OFC Rhea doesn't have supports . . . . again . . . .

MAIN BATTLE

I love how Byleth sides with whoever you're not playing as lol.

Dimitri wants to help Shez achieve her goals (defeating Byleth), and Shez is like "appreciate it, but focus on the war" lamo.

Dimitri is obviously projecting. Shez is explaining how they're not THAT upset about Byleth killing their former teammates. And she's like "you gotta get used to death when it happens all the time or it's too much weight." I think we ALL know where this is heading.

Shez is like "you've let things weigh on you too much" too true.

Though it's kind of sweet that he's trying to help Shez out lol. In his own way.

Awww, yeah, Dimitri over here suggesting they recruit Byleth now. I'm pro-Dimileth, tbh. Even IF I may prefer other ships a bit more, I still think it's pretty sweet.

Dimitri's like "what if we pay more than the Empire?" Like, Dimitri, WHERE ARE YOU GETTING ALL THIS MONEY??? Lamo. He's already in the poorest nation taking in all the refugees from Edelgard's mess and paying an army. Like he must have a finance genius working for him or something.

Kinda cool that AG suggested recruiting Byleth first.

Time to recruit Bernie. Never again will I leave her alone with Edelgard when I'm not monitoring her.

I feel like this is the most tactics I've seen a Fodlan leader use in a map battle ever. Dimitri's giving orders to explicitly ignore Byleth, which is different from every other route that says to attack Byleth before pulling back. He's doing it because he knows Byleth is too strong. Same for the Death Knight, who they trapped. It's pretty cool, actually. No one else has done anything like this.

Dimitri forced Jeralt to retreat right away, lamo. And then beat up Alois. I think . . . my Dimitri might be a tad over leveled. He's level 30. Everyone else is level 20. I may . . . use him a bit more than the others lol. But he just . . . kills everything.

Pretty smart tactics actually. Dimitri had all the strongholds captured, then focused on getting the Death Knight, then on Byleth. So securing the area, then picking off the threats.

Oh, cut scene. Sothis! I think Shez woke Sothis up. But let's be real. It was actually Dimitri who did all the work. Legit I had everyone else picking off Jeralt's reinforcements. My Dimitri took Byleth on by his lonesome.

Oh, Byleth and Sothis fighting??? Ohhhh. What's going on?

Sothis kicked Arval's ass lamo.

I'm sure I'll eventually get this discussion on the other routes.

Shez's rivalry seems so low key. Shez prioritizing recruiting like Dimitri suggested, lol.

Sothis is being a dick to Byleth. ngl. Kinda treating Byleth like a car she's driving.

Arval and Sothis seem to hate each other more than Shez and Byleth do.

I just . . . can't get beyond Alois abandoning his family to follow Jeralt around.

Oh, Byleth hair-color changed. Don't know if that just happened or not. Yep, Byleth just said something. Jeralt seems alarmingly unbothered his kid now has mint-colored hair and eyes for no actual reason. Like what if you woke up one day and -bam- you're a redhead. Wouldn't you be a bit, um, concerned?

Alois saying nothing about having to fight his old friends. Oh, there it is, finally. Man, they really stripped Alois of all his character and turned him into what the fandom claims Leonie is, a mindless Jeralt simp. But he has his jokes, I guess??

Nice to see Jeralt isn't interested in fighting Rhea. Just ignoring her. Fair enough.

Wait . . . Dimitri is leaving? Does that mean I don't have him? OMG. I need him. He's my OP unit. No.

Oh, Sreng. That's cool. They're actually getting involved. And Gautier is in trouble :( Will Sylvain leave too? Or is this the next battle?

Ohhh Annette called them peaceful. Ouch. Sylvain was quick to correct her, though. Poor girl just didn't know. Appreciate they gave them a realistic reason to attack though. Needing fertile lands was a real world reason stuff like this happened.

Yes, Shez, tag along. Please. Don't make Dimitri leave all on his own. I need him ahh. Oh, great, that's not where this is going.

DEDUE AND RODRIGUE. NO. Why. This sucks. Ugh. I lost 3 units this chapter???? WHYYY? Unless I am with them?

Leaving Felix in command is cool, though.

Dimitri just said "protect every last one of them." Oh, the change there lol.

Annette comes to like Dimitri's elbow lamo.

XXX

#azure gleam #fire emblem #fire emblem three hopes #three hopes #three hopes spoilers #azure gleam spoilers

[littleonixel]

I'm new here and I want to know about ur au

can I have a lil info?

have a nice day :3

You also have a nice day/night ^^

And my au(and I'll include ships bc there kinda part of my au -3-)? Well sure

Purple:

•Purple has a negative side of them, I call them corrupt, kinda like a voice, it was caused by his trauma as a kid, and that "voice" pretty reminds them of that quote on quote negative past, and yeah sure he does have happy memories, but Corrupt doesn't really like them, he likes to torture purple with it (sorry Purp)

(the voices were also inspired by @whumpydaydreams 'fanfiction)

•Purple is the type of guy who gets in to fights easily, and has anger issues, but their also a caring person when it comes to friends (Color gang, Mt, hallow heads? Maybe, not sure yet -.-")

•Is a anthophile, which means they like flowers, Alot. And that's why my purple likes hanging out with Blue so much, they also came up with flower nicknames for the color gang and Mt.

•Purple hobbies mostly are reading, planting w/ blue, and probably sleeping (purple is also a tired person due to being a workaholic, Headcanon bc of/from working for Mango)

Second coming:

•As you all know, Second is our tired little bean, but also angry when disturbed in their beauty sleep lol

•Second was kinda aware that they have powers, but not fully; second discovered his powers due to his stress, so during stressing out he suddenly blew out his powers, Of course they were shock, but didn't think anything about, bc he didn't care, he was stress okay?

(fun fact, there's still a hole in their wall after that incident)

•Second met chosen in a dream, that's it, I Know I'm weird

•Their hobbies include, building? Slightly, mostly judges them, fighting and ✨SLEEP✨

Blue:

•Blue, your average stick, has their own little interested, Everyone adores blue, some just don't like that nether wart eating habit

•As some of you AvM fans know that blue is the CG's best cook/hj, even when blue enjoys farming they do still like cooking, it was an interest after farming, he wanted to make something with it, so thus he become the Cg chef lol

•Even some of you make green closer to purple, Blue and purple are much more closer in my au, since both of them share the same interest and purple doesn't mind blue's nether wart eating habit

•Blue's hobbies are farming, cooking, and playing music, and maybe making dru- I mean potions-

Green:

•Mm, yes Green, one of our best Cg singers, he does like discovering things and disturb some sticks in their sleep(mostly Second lmao)

•Even if Green loves the disturbing the other sticks in their sleep, he also sings lullaby to the others when having nightmares, getting lack of sleep, ECT.

•Sometimes Green and Purple sing together, one the ppl in the fandom called them sympathy duo which I think is cute -w-

•Forgot to mention Green's other talent! Building, yup. Basically one of the best builders in the Cg group :3

•Green's hobbies are singing and making music, especially building

Red:

•Red of course love animals, mostly pigs and chickens, quite an animal lover if you ask me ^-^

•Red is also vegetarian, he doesn't really eat meat, but does eat dairy, the only reason why he doesn't eat meat is because they feel bad of killing animals =3="

•I also like to image whenever Reuben from Minecraft story mode, idk why I just thought it was funny

•Red's hobbies are just literally taking care of animals

Yellow:

•Yellow is the scientist of the group, they really like to create to things, from redstone to potions (not just blue)

•He is also one of the sticks who has been staying up all night, to do research, of course which is a result of burnout

•Although yellow is really smart, he can also be a good at times, mostly around red, he does this whenever the sticks feel sad

•Yellow's hobbies are redstone and potions

Ships~:

Secondpurp- Second liked hanging around with Purple, and of course grew on them, soon Purple also caught feeling with Tsc, and second confessed and now they're dating ^-^<3

McDonald's: Red was and always will be a flirt, and for yellow, they of course went with sometimes sees it as a joke, but sooner or later both started to have a crush on each other, and now they're dating B)

Bamboo: Green fell in love first with blue, it was probably because of their kind nature, a caring and kind stick, the more they hung out the they grew on each other, so few months later Green confessed:')

I know this was few days ago, sorry busy with school, but hope you found this informative, and I'll probably do another part for the other sticks ^w^<3

#ava #animator vs animations #alanbecker #alan becker #avm #animation vs minecraft #animator vs animation #ava purple #ava green #ava blue #ava second coming #ava red #ava yellow #ava Headcanon #avm headcanons #AskAxel #AxelAnswers

[wags-confessions]

“I think it's sad and scary to have a life dedicated purely to supporting your famous husband.”

I really hate this sentiment. I’m currently in medical school and growing up, I used to have this snobbish attitude towards housewives. I did. For as long as I remember, I’ve always wanted to be a surgeon and I often felt bad for my mom who is a housewife. I thought she lacked ambition and even self-respect. I used to have this attitude of “I’m gonna be better than mom” or “I’m not gonna be like mom” but then I grew up and realized that being a housewife was a choice my mom made because she genuinely loved homemaking. She loves raising her kids and looking after her husband and her family. She thrives off of giving and caring and running a household. She finds it very rewarding. I always thought she was forced into being a housewife because she did not have any options until she told me that it was her decision and she does not consider herself inferior or less valuable for it. Quite the opposite actually, she feels fulfilled by being a mom and a wife. And when I look back at my childhood, I can honestly say I was so loved and cherished and looked after. We often underestimate housewives because we are live in a society that thinks girlbossing is the only form of feminism and anything “less” is something to be ashamed of or be pitied for. But that’s not true. Also, let’s not judged Antonela’s existence as only being about Messi and her kids. Although that’s how it may appear to us, the truth is she has a full life behind the scenes we dont know about. The idea that she has dedicated her whole life to Messi is an lazy assumption. She has hobbies too that are not related to Messi. She has her own identity, personality that is more than just Messi’s pretty wife. She also now makes money through instagram. I heard she also has other business endeavors. And if she decides to spend a majority of her life raising her boys, who are we to judge? That’s her choice. Why would Messi be disappointed with that? Not everything has to be about being a girlboss. Traditional roles work for some families and people. There is no shame in that. I’m so grateful for my mom being a housewife. I’m even more grateful that she never felt like being one meant limiting herself or settling for less than what she deserves. She never felt like my dad and my siblings and I robbed her of her life. She loves us and we love and respect her. We think very highly of her. We dont think of her as dumb or less than us. We value her very much. And when I think about my younger self feeling so above of my mother for actually having “ambitions,” I am ashamed and I want to smack my past self. How dare I thought of my mom having no ambition. Her ambition was to be a good homemaker- a good wife and good mother. How dare I thought that her ambition was less than mine when it’s the reason I am who I am today.

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