#I have been even worse than normal | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

sophsicle · 1 year

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is it too early for a little kyd sneaky peak?

#I have so many asks that I want to answer #I'm so sorry #I have been even worse than normal #I am so brain dead #kyd #soph rambles #also I love them #like I love them so much #I'm so excited about this story honestly because of the ending I get to give them

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cloudysarts · 4 months

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this show would be good if literally everything about it was different

#read these tags please(unless ur an HH fan in which case please ignore them) >>> I DO NOT LIKE THIS SHOW #i hate viv///ziepop so fucking much its actually unreal. every time i think about her i seethe #been hatewatching it ('legally') nd its awful. like i mean i knew it would be going into it but goddamn. so much worse than i expected #you may be like 'whyd you draw this then'. i wanted to make a finished piece with my redesigns #for funsies me and my boyf have been rewriting/redesigning the whole show . thats been our fun little craft #i feel similar about this that i do about fnaf and miraculous ladybug even tho this is objectively worse in every way #theres this eternal feeling of like. man. if the writers were competent then this concept would be interesting #but theyre not so. here we are #anyway. im gona try not to put hate in the tags lol #but i like how this turned out too much NOT to post it #anyways mutuals please dont unfollow me for this i promise im normal JDSFHJKDFHJDFKHJK #Hazbin Hotel Redesigns #Hazbin Hotel Critical #Angel Dust #Husk #Huskerdust #I guess.#genuinely a little scared to post this ones. im scared ill lose mutuals over this AND/OR fans will harass me for those tags JHKSDFHJKJK #im posting it and then immediately going to sleep. might delete later if even 1 thing goes wrong #EDIT RL QUICK i wanna add: i dont care if you like the show <33 good for you!!! i respect it!! i liked it when i was 14. i just dont now. <

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ecoamerica · 2 months

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commsroom · 1 year

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i don't think early-series hera gets enough credit for how funny she is. "scans do indicate a percentage drop in the tank's capacity that is commensurate with the amount officer eiffel could stuff into a crewmember duffel bag"? she saw him do it. she probably talked to him while he did it. it's the tonal dissonance between highly technical phrasing and a very blunt observation. like when eiffel asks her for her top five 'stick it to the man' songs and she asks him things like 'top five lanthanides?' until he says "you're just yanking my chain, aren't you?" and she responds by quoting anarchy in the uk at him. sure, sometimes there are things she genuinely doesn't get and/or would express differently, but the way she frames it is playing with the false expectations people have of her. she knows exactly what she's doing.

#wolf 359 #w359 #hera wolf 359 #things like 'upping sarcasm to 74 percent' ... she's doing that on purpose #i'm trying to think of the right way to express this but like. hm.#hera is allowed to make jokes based on her being an AI and the perception people have of her because of that #but other people making comments or jokes about it clearly bothers her so it does. almost come across as a defense mechanism too #in the same way eiffel presents himself as an idiot to lessen the sting of failure #hera will sometimes play up perceived differences or assumptions because when she's sincere and people treat her as if she can't relate #that's worse.#and i think there is some kind of. way that aligns with autistic experiences like both that #the way you express yourself will be perceived as Different even if you are trying to relate to Normal Human Experiences #but also that people will make assumptions about the things they think you won't get or relate to without even asking #and there's. i don't know. there's something i see there #in the way hera navigates that and how intentional her framing is and how much of it. lessens over time #because the way other people see her and interact with her changes #more than anything about how she thinks or what she values. that's always been pretty constant.#i always kind of end up back on a version of this topic. and this was meant to be a lighthearted post. but you know... wolf 359...

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mamawasatesttube · 13 days

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i wish it wasn't so normal for people to complain about unfinished wips or fics that take a long time to update. because sometimes i think i have a really fun idea for a fic but it'd take a while for me to write, and i like talking about my work as i do it and i don't like writing entire fics over like 20k without sharing, because i lose steam. so if i were to write and post that cool fic idea, it'd be as a wip. and then i think about all the people who just refuse to engage with wips, or all the other people who would just go "update pls" all the time, and of how people only really comment in the first 24 hours something is posted and then it's lost to obscurity, and then i just go "actually whats the point in going through the effort writing this out? i'll just daydream about it now and then and be done with it." and then i don't write it. alas!

#rimi talks #shoutout to that one person who followed me from resi fandom and commented on one of my dc fics like ''pls update that resi fic''#also shoutout to all those tumblr posts about how theres nOthInG wOrSe than finding a GoOd FiC but its uNFiNIsHeD #i used to really like writing longfic but these days i kind of shy away from it bc it rly does get discouraging #like they say ''write for yourself'' and i do but i certainly dont share just for my own satisfaction yk???#anyways. i already have space fic and theres no need for me to start another fic. even if it would be fun.#ive also just been in a Mood about writing since yesterday and thats not helping matters 😔#but it feels like a stupid thing to be in A Mood about. idk. whatever jdlksk hopefully itll pass and ill be normal tomorrow :/#bc talking to duck earlier today we came up with a really fun mermay fic premise. but. writing? me? multichap again? lol. lmao even #like i would love to!!!!!! having two ongoing multichaps wouldnt kill me i like to pingpong between wips #but dealing with people whining about update times or telling me they refuse to read bc its a wip...... dunno if i can do that again fellas #okay. enough woes and whining. i guess i will go play a video game

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musubiki · 9 months

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i might have mentioned this sometime before but ive been thinking about it again: the reason why lime doesnt ask mochi out and vice versa for a while

Some time after mochi becomes a witch and lime has been in her guild, also after he becomes PAINFULLY aware of how he feels about her, theres a moment where he has a conversation with her (casual-like) fishing about how she would feel about getting a boyfriend. as long as hes known her, shes never gone on a date with anyone, no ones asked her out, and shes never mentioned having a crush on anyone to him. so during some conversation about something or another, he asks something along the lines of "Well when you get a boyfriend, he's gonna need to be okay with your weird witchiness I guess haha-- (lowkey interest check)"

and his plan here was IF she answers to some extent that she would like a boyfriend, he would ask her out. but instead she kinda smiles a bit and falls quiet, before responding "If I could have one..."

and when he asks what the hell that even means, she tells him the same thing pom and tiramisu told her when she first became a witch: "This isn't just some happy fun times, willy=nilly side hobby you treat carelessly. Your family legacy and more importantly, your life, are both constantly at risk and you need to always be focused on learning and mastering your magic as it grows. To that end, you don't have time to date and be in a relationship-- it'll only be a distraction to you and a weakness that can be exploited. You'll constantly be split between your magic and your partner. Either you won't be fully committed to your studies to spend time with them, or you won't be fully committed to them because of your studies. It's not a luxury you can afford. Until this is complete and you have full mastery of your magic to the point where you're not constantly in a state where you need to fight for your life, having a boyfriend is advised against."

and lime just kinda stays quiet for a bit, before going "...so no boyfriend until the magic shit is all done..."

and in his head hes thinking yeah, fine, that makes sense. I dont want to be a burden to her or distract her, and I dont want to cause more stress for her because pom is like an asian mom that constantly will remind her about what a bad decision it is. and this ALL hinges on the event that she wants to date him and it doesnt ruin their friendship. so he eventually decides fine. ill hold off on it for now, just be there for her however i can and i'll ask her out when this whole thing is done (and in the meantime, maybe i can gauge how much she likes me if at all, and if not i can try to get her to fall for me)

(worth noting he WANTS to ask her out right before the timeskip happens, something like "Hey we should go get ice cream tomorrow-- you know, to celebrate your magic reaching its full power and all." (where he was gonna ask her out for real), and she smiles and says "Sure!", but pom already told her she was leaving that night, and by the next morning shes gone)

#bpp #text #lore #anyway. i was thinking about this but i dont know if i ever reached a full-fledged explaintation #i was never a fan of shows where theyre like trying to save the world from destruction and one side of the couple is like #(you never have time for me!!!) OBVIOUSLY?!?!#anyway pom and tiramisus advice is to not...have that #in an idea situation the witch doesnt fucking fall in love before shes even a witch #but what can they do ig #that actually makes it worse bc she loves him so much shes WAY more likely to neglect her magic studies to hang out with him instead #vs a normal. not in love witch. navigating a relationship she could drop if she didnt love them #this same logic applies to the post=timeskip. maybe even worse because rather than mochi being in danger now the whole world actually is #or at least all the witches #and lime is like FUCK when am i gonna be able to ask her out?!#hes wayyy more dismissive of pom in the post-timeskip when pom is like (no!! she needs to focus!!)#and limes like (oh piss off cat shes been focusing for like 5 years she can go on a date or two DAMN)

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nicmares404 · 5 months

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Bruh, this is the third time i've been sick in the last 2 months. Viruses have to actually be targeting me at this point, cause this is just ridiculous (⊙_◎)

Like yeah I have a weaker immune system, but I'm literally not even going anywhere! I guess whatever traces my sister brings home from school (she's in HS) is enough. To make matters worse, my toddler brother is about to start pre-school. I sense so many more illnesses in my future O|￣|_

#i'm really excited he's starting school though #he's practically my kid so that adds to it #i guess this is kind of a vent? rant? idk #i'm just really irritated #especially since everyone else is usually fine #or if they do get sick they are better within a day or two #and i'm out for like a week #and also to find out that i can't even take dayquil/nyquil anymore without severe pain (i have been taking it my whole life)#yeah this is a rant #feel free to ignore #i just need to complain a bit😅#i'm also gonna take a covid test cause this sore throat is worse than normal #i've only had 4 things that made it this bad and covid is one of them #cheese says stuff #rant

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ecoamerica · 1 month

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pochapal · 2 months

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went outside and exercised normally for the first time since The Incident and i felt fine outside of the expected Hasn't Exercised in several months feelings. against doctor's orders btw but i would rather be dead than forced to spend all my time at home not doing a single thing that could exert me in any way <3

#:)#like it's so funny that they mandated i cannot drive leave the country vigorously exercise or eat snack food maybe ever again for no reason #fully my medical notes read like i'm in the managed decline phase of a terrible chronic illness even though i'm literally chilling #i feel no worse than how i normally do a couple weeks after a rough covid infection like babygirl i have no debilitating symptoms.......#PLUS my kidneys are slowly unfucking themselves anyway like. do i really need this much independence taken away for my own protection......#longterm housebound for a short term Silly Incident??? please be serious for more than two seconds #cranky about this because it's been a month and there's still no diagnosis but they have the room to tell me what i can't do #my appointment a couple days ago was supposed to clear me to do certain things again but they denied it and i've been sulking for days #literally the only thing wrong with me is that my blood tests are saying bad things and some really annoying side effects of my meds #and i can guarantee that me resting and doing nothing is not the reason i'm not in pain or otherwise suffering in any measurable way #even when i was actively in a state of dying in hospital i wasn't in pain like get with it!!!#sometimes if i think about this too hard i end up feeling like a caged animal lmao

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needylittlegirl · 3 months

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being a little lover girl is awful because why do i remember every single thing about people. you can say something so small teeny tiny offhand and i’ll remember it. but i dont think anybody does the same for me?? i dont think people are ever as devoted to me as i am to them

#sometimes i wish i could stop loving people so hard #im not even talking romantically #i just mean in any sense #theres nothing nothing worse than knowing everything about someone and wanting to be such close friends with them #but they just think of you as like. an acquaintance i guess?#nothing happened its just like period emotions or something #well actually thats a lie talking to someone lately has been killing me cause i know they dont care as much as i do #so its a little internal battle lately of do i cut them off so it doesnt eat me alive or do i keep being their friend cause really #theres no good reason to cut them off its just that i feel too much and dont know how to be normal about it !!#whatever #tbd #yeah whatever its just hormones ill get over it #but for now i have to cry my lil eyes out <3 #im just tired of having More feelings all the time #im such a giver why do i only attract takers!!

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criscura · 4 months

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I wish I wasn't so exhausted and I could make more art.... I even planned out a whole prompt-a-day month for Saigenos/Genosai, TWICE, but the first time no one seemed like they could participate when I asked about it, and the second time I friggin lost the damned plan. I could remake it a third time, but I just....I don't know.

I've been really struggling to get along for a while, and I think if it didn't hit it off--or even if I just got really productive and it seemed like I was reaching crickets--I'd be so incredibly discouraged that it would bring me down even further. It usually takes my stuff a few months to a year to get reach, and that really doesn't do anything for me when I need the support immediately.

It's not that I don't have a billion ideas for so many different things, but my battery has been taking longer and longer to charge up and it's been running out faster and faster, and it's been like this for....a year?? Ish?? Maybe longer, I don't know.

I wish I could just stop needing so much fucking time to bounce back.....

#written from my bed as I'm almost crying from exhaustion and hopelessness #I'm PMSing and I had a really tiring day so i know this feels worse than normal #but when you've been struggling to fall asleep for months because waking up means being disappointed in yourself #for everything you failed to do the day before and everything you know you're going to fail to do again today #it's really hard not to feel like shit about yourself #trying to be constantly hopeful but never living up to your expectations #and then the few times that you do you completely crash for days #and then the only way to not crash is to have your big accomplishment be 'i went to the gym' 'i took a shower' 'i answered a message'#and just. again #to have the be the way you're living for months and months and months #it's so embarrassing to admit how little i can do and it makes me so ashamed knowing how much I've done and see what everyone else around me #is constantly doing #and then when i do share things it just kind of dies off because I've been too exhausted to maintain most relationships #which ALSO makes me feel like absolute fucking shit because i think people think i just don't care about them #when it's really that it takes me hours to get out of bed and I'm lucky if i remember to eat before 4 #and I hate so much of myself and see it as such a huge waste of time that it uses up almost all the energy i have to take care of myself #but if i don't do it I'll just hate myself even more #i know i keep on complaining about this but I'm. I'm trying to fix it #i have BEEN trying to fix it actively for so fucking long #but it's.....i think I've stopped believing anything i do has significant worth and it makes it hard to keep trying #and i know people will read this and say take something for it but when you're only interactions with medications and drugs #are one experience that scarred you so bad you didn't go to the doctors for ten years and one experience so bad #that you couldn't even explain it at first without HARDCORE disassociating #it's hard to convince yourself that anything will ever be any better and that it won't make everything intensely worse for years

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itslookingback · 7 months

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:/

#my experience so far with uni has kind of been:#my mind shouting ''am i doing enough. is this normal. i should be doing more. i should be more extroverted''#but unfortunately i am not more extroverted #guy who never did anything social on weekends before uni now realising that this might have been a bad idea #i don't want myself to become so isolated from other people #but i genuinely don't know what to do #i don't drink. i don't like going out in the evenings (unless there's a quiz). the other queer people i know are more extroverted than me.#i'm sure they're lovely everything just feels intimidating #it just feels like everything is happening a little bit wrong #did the people who said uni is meant to be the best years consider that i am just a bit too autistic for this statement to be true to me #i'm tired of feeling trapped tbh #it's so stupid. i know that the worst that can happen is having an awkward time #i knew i was going to have a worse time at uni than other people but augh.#i KNOW i'm bad at making friends and being in friend groups. i know. i'm just tired #it's not looking good for me when i'm not in uni anymore i'm not gonna lie. if i'm struggling a lot now #teehee #anyway. i should sleep. i'm tired and need to get up early #it's just the second month. it's ok. i'm sure other people are feeling like this as well #mumbles

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kelin-is-writing · 1 month

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Was about to go in my drafts to keep writing, BUT THEN I REALIZED THAT I’VE REACHED 1k FOLLOWERS??? LITERALLY WHEN??? 😭

I’m so lost I swear… You guys thank you so much???? I am truly so grateful, more than the followers I’m grateful for the love and support you guys to this day keep giving me and what I write, I didn’t really expect I would go this far with this blog since I’ve just been well… Busy being horny over Dabi, losing my shit over Dabi, fangirling over Dabi… Fantasizing about Dabi… Just… 👹 Dabi 👹

ANYWAYS!!! Thank you everyone, I sincerely love you lots and I’ll do my best to bring you all content about Dabi that will make you all lose your shit, want to tear your hair off and make you want to scream into the void 😚💜

#kelin talks #kelin’s ramblings #1000 followers #1k followers #my beloveds 💜#ONCE AGAIN. THANK YOU ALL MY PRECIOUS BABIES FOR ALWAYS SUPPORTING ME AND SHOWERING ME WITH LOVE SINCE I’VE STARTED THIS BLOG #I LOVE YOU AND APPRECIATE YOU GUYS SO MUCH I’M GOING TO FUCKING HOWL OUT OF THE BALCONY TO SHOW MY LOVE FOR YOU ALL 💃🏻💜#i’m dramatic extra and a lil bit of a weirdo ngl… BUT YOU GUYS MAKE ME EVEN WORSE THAN THIS BECAUSE YOU ALL HAVE ALWAYS BEEN SO PRECIOUS 😭#but i can also be normal about some things i promise 😘

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pepprs · 6 months

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not to p*riod post but like. it came so late last month and it’s even later this month probably both due to stress (lol) and i mean i never “hope” i will get it ever but i was hoping id get it during the fall break so it wouldn’t mess up any of the things i need to do this week and i think there’s like a 90% chance im gonna get it tomorrow which is a jam packed day during which im supposed to give a campus tour to a prominent vice president an hour after getting to the office so. lol

#purrs #i don’t want to call it when i don’t even have cramps yet but if i wake up in agony im probably going to work from home. im trying this new #thing where i don’t push myself to do the usual thing if im in agony and i know there’s stuff that needs to get done but it won’t get done #well if im not well first so. yeah. i feel so bad like the tour is at 10 and im probably gonna… idk. i shouldn’t say im going to do when i #don’t know for certain yet but it’s not looking good. also i am kinda worried abt why suddenly it’s getting later and later like ive been #thru much worse stuff than what’s happening currently and it came maybe like 2 days late at most but im getting to the point where it’s #around a week late now and ummmmm. i don’t think that is normal 😃 but i am trying not to think about it that hard bc nothing else is ‘wrong #that i can tell it’s just it’s late. idk. im dreading it so much i always dread it it’s so so painful and i hate knowing im about to #experience such severe pain i cant function for like 24-36 hrs 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰#delete later #probably gonna have to cancel the tour which will make me look like a flake but. 😐

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theygender · 1 year

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Why is it called a "common cold" when this is the worst hell I've experienced in my life. My nose and throat are burning like I snorted chili powder and gargled wasabi. My head feels like someone is inflating it with a tire pump and it's pushing all my brains out through my nose. This is worse than when I've had COVID, strep, flu, or pneumonia. What kind of hell are they putting in colds these days

#jury is still out on whether its worse than mono but thats mainly bc it affects your entire body #and tbh the time i had pneumonia it DID get worse than this but thats mainly bc they didnt diagnose it for over a week and it got dangerous #its worse than normal pneumonia tho #and it is DEFINITELY worse than strep. i used to get strep at least once a year and thats what this felt like when it first started #but now that the congestion and drainage has been added on top of the sore throat its even worse. im dying squirtle #its definitely worse than flu too. and im not even gonna mention bronchitis bc its not even in the same LEAGUE as this shit #and at least covid actually responded to dayquil and nyquil. why are neither one of these doing shit for me now??#'extra strength cold & flu' MY ASS #i tested negative for strep flu and covid and the docs determined it was an upper respiratory infection (common cold)#why is the COLD medicine not working for my COLD #im about to start fucking trepanning to get rid of this head pressure i s2g #im having to work through this #rambling

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carmillatism · 9 months

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mechs headcanon otd: carmilla just straight up forgot to tell the mechs that they're disabled, and it took them just. so long to figure it out

#i'm not projecting. YOU'RE projecting #i have made both sad and silly headcanons for why she forgot #the silly one is that she is just so used to disability that like she didn’t think she had to mention it #she's lived forever so she would just assume that they would know since she knows #sad hc is that uh she like took care of them well in the beginning that they didn’t even realize their bodies weren't working the best #then as she slowly grew more and more obsessed with the mechanisms over Her Mechanisms #she made their symptoms and stuff worse either through neglect or by experiments that everything went downhill and got worse #and all the while she forgot to mention that something had ever been wrong in the first place since she was so engrossed with them #as projects rather than her children #and when she got airlocked... they had no guide on what being disabled is or that they could be disabled #(because ofc they've seen disabled but they aren’t disabled. they're not even fully living anyway so)#um. but they eventually figure out... from someone. i'd say raph probably tells them lmao #in happy silly hc for this the mechs figure it out whilst carm is still there and they're just like #“hey why didn’t you tell us we're disabled”#and she's like “i forgor”#i'm so normal about the mechs and disability #disabled #physically disabled #the mechanisms #dr. carmilla #child neglect #ment #so normal #headcanon #nas' thoughts

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cuntwrap--supreme · 10 months

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My mom: *telling me how she's only done what's best for her kids*

Me: *reminds her of a time when she absolutely did the worst for us because it benefitted her more than not doing it would have*

My mom: You have such a creative memory! Wow! You're gaslighting me! This is abuse!

#parental abuse #abuse #bad parenting #bad parent #trauma #childhood trauma #literally this started because she refuses to remember that she sold my water bed for crack money #like. that was the only bed I've ever had that didn't make my back hurt while i slept.#and she sold it. for crack.#and she's all bullshit that never happened!#and so i ask her about like two other shitty things she did and never apologized for #and she pulls out her new favorite word - gaslighting - which she learned from some dumbfuck tv show she's been watching #but when i ask her if she even knows what that means she goes see that's gaslighting!#like. no. gaslighting is telling me things i (and my siblings!!) have a vivid memory of never happened.#trying to act like i have no business being mad at her is #acting as if I'm being dramatic. that my childhood was normal. that not having food or power and living in a crack hoise is average.#i cannot wait to get out of here in december. only 18 long weeks to go!#if i ever have to live with her again I'll kill myself. these two years have been worse for my mental health than anything ever.#I'm a whole ass adult yet I'm not allowed to so much as leave the house without her demanding to know where I'm going.#i have to lie to her if I'm going to see my bald dude (rare. but if it happens) or else she gets pissed at me for seeing people???#but if i say I'm visiting friends (not entirely a lie) she'll accuse me of going and doing gay shit?#because apparently being queer is the worst thing your kid can be in her mind #that i haven't kicked the shit out of her has to be some sort of testament to my patience as a person right?

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fafrogke · 7 days

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what if i... change my username... haha no actually im not kidding im going to do it i just don't know to what

#grug going to do it for real #i just don't want the word frog there anymore because of things #it doesn't have to do with anything from here tho! my brain just has been more stressed than normal about things #real life too much i don't even want to be here #but im trying to act the same so no much problem i think *-10 hp* wait what was that #but maybe if i change it i will feel less scared here? would that make a difference inmy brain i feel worse than last year #i already feel like i don't have an identity so changing the name it's kind of killing me but that's the idea i think #it will probably be something stupid again hehe #anyways hugs and kisses i will be back #silly squeaking time #i think some time later i will show u something and by something haha well lets justr say-💥💥💥💥💥AUGH

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