#also it’s very much MY perception of them so yeah ignore it if u please

[okultraoldmanyaoi]

okay but can we hear about those interpretations of angels and demons???

I ASSUME YOU MEAN MY PET PEEVES WITH INTERPRETATIONS OF ANGELS AND DEMONS … in which case yeah i love to complain sorry guys

1. bigoted angels + demons

i REALLY find an issue with this. i can kind of get the reasoning behind it but. in terms of angels it’s usually bc the church in itself is pretty damn bigoted. and in terms of demons it’s “well bigotry = bad and demons = bad”. and these are both kind of okay reasoning and i guess it depends on the story you’re trying to tell but i find a HUGEEE issue with them for the sole fact that i really doubt they were taught any of the division or “this group is unlike us” that humans need to be bigoted? i don’t imagine physical appearance is very important to angels either

transphobic + homophobic angels n demons tick me off PARTICULARLY because i really doubt they were taught gender roles?? they wouldn’t even HAVE genders??? not even sex i don’t think— at least not labels for it or anything. it just doesn’t make sense to me, it doesn’t have the basis a society would need to be divided like that. sure, bigots are going to hell so that COULD influence some things, but demons aren’t bigots OR humans… they’re former angels. they hate humans. why would they try imitating them and their hate, especially to the degree i’ve seen them portrayed. i don’t get it

2. inherently bad demons, inherently good angels

this is more of a nitpick than anything but like… it just peeves me, even when it’s subverted. like hot take i don’t think either of these groups are innately good or bad. and i think it’s stupid to divide them like that. I KNOW YOU ALL ARE GOING TO THINK I’M CRAZY BUT LISTEN!!!

i do believe that demons are bound to be worse than angels because of their bitterness from falling and their deep disdain towards humanity. hell also just does Not sound that great. so yes they’re probably SOMEWHAT jackasses, but in a sense that it’s more of a coping mechanism + survival thing. like the weak die or whatever.

but i also don’t think the angels are doing too hot? again, i definitely don’t think they’re WORSE than hell but like. i like to imagine that they’re a little more strict. a little more stressed. esp considering the main church meant to represent them is Shit. ALSO ALSO!! i refuse to believe that the war in heaven didn’t affect some of the angels. like r u telling me A THIRD of angels fell and NONE of them were close to or acquainted with angels that are still in heaven?

TL;DR both of these groups are traumatized, also stop thinking in black and white pretty please ❤️

3. angels and demons are equally as bad

related to last one. though i think they’re both somewhat bad and somewhat good, i don’t think they’re the same. they have different motivations, different experiences, different systems… it doesn’t make sense to me when they’re the exact same.

i could deal with a “maybe they weren’t so different after all...” but that’s entirely circumstantial. like if they’re very obviously identical in mannerisms and in each others’ faces about it, then that’s something i don’t like. but if it’s a dramatic irony thing where only the audience can see their similarities behind closed doors or they’re very subtle then that’s fine.

if you want them to both be evil, make them evil in different ways. if you want them to both be good, make them good in different ways. they're in different environments surrounded by different things and they have different motivations!! they should NOT have the same perception of everything!

4. demons =/= fallen angels

this is more of an “ermmmm actually 🤓” peeve and i haven’t seen this take in a while but. yeah. it’s not accurate and also not interesting enough for me to ignore that fact. it also just makes it kinda nonsensical as to why demons want to torment humans so bad?

on that note it rly bugs me when demon issues from falling just Aren’t addressed. like do you have any idea how much character you could develop by exploring those kind of unique abandonment issues alone? do you have any idea how more fleshed out it could feel? it’s more of a peeve of “god there’s so much potential here and none was taken” but.

5. all angels are related

ok i cant really explain this one much but it just irritates me. there’s nothing exactly disproving it but there’s also nothing to prove it? i mean, sure, they have the same creator, but that doesn’t really mean anything. i just don’t believe all [however many angels there are] of them were socialized like siblings. n i also VERY heavily doubt they’re related by blood. i do believe some can have relationships with each other similar to siblings but like!!! not all of them. if that makes sense

okay that’s all i can think of atm. sorry for being a nerd and a hater. also this should be obvious but my word isn’t law and these r just my opinions and not rules for you to follow! if u enjoy one or more of these then it’s fine

#picket ramble

[miscomm]

.

#putting this on the tags and deleting it in a bit bc I’m a coward and scared of what the actual widely accepted j/r timeline/storyline is #and this is coming from someone who is not well versed in jegulus so take it with a grain of salt #also it’s very much MY perception of them so yeah ignore it if u please #but luc and i were talking abt the James becomes a death eater for regulus and how we cannot see James ever becoming a death eater #and I kept thinking that james inability to be able to see any shade of grey (especially at age 15-16) is very much why a canonical jegulus #is destined to fall apart and to not make it past regulus’ choices #essentially a canon jegulus is both of them taking extremes and not being able to meet each other ever in the middle #mostly on James side because I think he finds it harder to see the world in scales of grey #and regulus wants NEEDS james to fold a bit for him but James can’t #so regulus decision to be a death eater is definetely the downfall but it is tied to James’ inability to understand (for now) a less black #and white world #ofc AU can switch up James completly and whichever way anyone writes him is valid and he can become a death eater but you’d have to change #A LOT about canon for that to work #still have fun with yallses characters do what u want they’re not real people #my perceptions and opinions might be very wrong but hey if u read this thanks for coming to my lecture

[daisyjoons]

Love Notes

— who knew a piece of paper would be the cause of all this love, and heartbreak.

— ot7 x reader

— college!au, bet!au, heirs!bts, angst, some fluff, hurt and comfort

— like one mention of “dxxx” but it’s in a joke, a couple cuss words, like one or two f-bombs (cuz that’s apparently another level than ‘cuss word’) 

— word count: 2.8K

— this is my first fic using“bullet points” (which i kinda really enjoyed writing) so tell me if you guys like this style or not! also!!!! my inbox is always open to talk! about my fics or even just to say hi! i’d love to interact with you all some more! 

— HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!! IF U DRESS UP GREAT!! TAKE CUTE PICS THEN TAKE IT OFF AND GET IN YOUR PJS AND WATCH A DAMN MOVIE :D WE’RE IN A PANDEMIC AND A PARTY IS NOT WORTH IT!!

↬ The bet was so completely stupid. 

↬ That’s all it was but they had made it. And now they had to deal with its aftermath. 

↬ It had happened when they were sophomores in college. 

↬ You had just started your freshman year and for some reason, the boys didn’t like you. 

↬ So during the Art History class they shared with you, while the teacher was talking about the syllabus, the boys did it. 

↬ It started with mocking texts, and ended with a $20 bet on who can get you to date them for 2 months. 

↬ And yeah they all loved each other, but Jungkook didn’t know of the feelings between the boys, or the feelings the boys had for him as well.

↬ He also remained unaware of the secret kisses shared between the boys, of the days where they sneak out on dates, the boys not knowing how to tell him. 

↬ Given the fact that they all came from rich families (also the reason for all the age differences) the bet was more of a fun game for them all.

↬ The boys had agreed to write it all down on paper, letting Hoseok who was studying law, (and subsequently getting ready to take over his mother’s very successful law firm) write it out. 

↬ With the “contract” that detailed very explicitly what the bet was, the boys all signed their names.

↬ Two days after, Jungkook went up to you to ask for the syllabus notes, as he didn’t pay much attention.

↬ Two weeks later he asked you out on your guys’ first date.

↬ Two months after that, he asked you to be his girlfriend. 

↬ Everything was going great, until he decided to introduce you to his friends a week after being his girlfriend.

↬At this point the boys had forgotten about the bet, seeing you only as someone who their object of affection loved. 

↬ Now, you knew they didn’t like you, and during the meeting you definitely felt the jealousy aimed at you when you got close with Jungkook.

↬ So, you tried to avoid him a little, hoping it would help his friendship with the boys. 

↬ But Jungkook had forgotten about the bet, he just saw you as the sweet girl he’s been dating. 

↬ And maybe it was wrong because he still felt his heart flutter when Joons chin did the thing while he studied, or the way he just wanted to kiss Jin's lips when he pouted, or because of all of his midnight cuddles with Hobi, but he loved you.

↬ That was the thing about Jungkook, once he loves he loves truly and rawly. 

↬ And you now held a part of his heart and he couldn’t change that. 

↬ After a few days the boys all noticed the younger's attitude, and with a discussion decided to talk to you. 

↬ To say Namjoon showing up at your door at 6pm was strange would be an understatement.

↬ He was on the brink of tears when he asked you to talk to Jungkook and it was obviously more than just friendship that caused the distance between you and the boys. 

↬ So, with slight hesitation you ask. “Do you love him?” 

↬ With no hesitation he answers, “Yes. We all do, more than a brother, but as a lover.” 

↬ With that he explains about the relationship with the boys, and how Jungkook didn’t know of it. How they all loved Jungkook.

↬ “But he loves you, Y/N. And we love him, enough to know that we just want him happy, even if it’s not with us. We do like you, you seem nice, we just- we just got jealous. We’re sorry for acting the way we did but please, don’t let us hold you away from Jungkook.” 

↬ And perhaps it was wrong the way your heart fluttered at Namjoons sincerity and maturity.

↬ But you paid no mind, it didn’t matter. 

↬ The next day you talked to Jungkook after class and everything was good again.

↬ The boys started acting nicer to you and slowly you fell in love, and it was so slow that you were able to ignore it until you couldn’t ignore it anymore. 

↬ First it started with Namjoon, and small coffee study times between you two. 

↬ Then came Yoongi, with the cute gummy smile he got when he created a good song. 

↬ When Hobi learned you didn’t know how to dance and absolutely insisted on personal classes so he could teach you. 

↬ Who would’ve thought the amazing, straight A law student would be this wild while dancing. 

↬ Surprise!!! He could get wild. 

↬ Whenever Jin brings home special dishes from one of his dad's restaurants that he knows you like.

↬ Taehyung probably took the longest to warm up to you, but you fell in love with him so easily.

↬  And Jimin, he fell in love with you first, and made his move first. 

↬ During a movie night, he blurted out his love for you that led to a night filled with tears and yelling and kisses and sweet words. 

↬ That’s how you all fell in love.

↬ Now two years later, you’re helping them move out of their dorms and into their shared apartment, none the wiser of the bet.

↬ The boys had just graduated and decided to buy an apartment together. 

↬ And you were gonna move in too, after your senior year. 

↬ But here you were, cleaning out Jungkook's closet when you come across his backpacks from the last four years. 

↬ “Jungkook! Why do you just have all your old bags!”

↬ He turns around before laughing at the bags that were jammed up in the corner of the closet, still filled with notebooks.

↬ “Oh, I probably forgot to just throw those away, You can just toss them in the trash bag over there, babe.”

↬ “What! No! These look almost brand new still! Why don’t you...I don’t know, donate them? Crazy idea.”

↬ Jungkook laughs at the obvious sarcasm at the end of your sentence and at the knowledge that you would do so anyway before nodding with the go ahead. 

↬ You start dumping all the bags out and tossing the trash before you recognize the sophomore year bag. 

↬ Your mind immediately drifts to two weeks into the friendship when he had yet to return your notebook and had to go through the giant mess in there. Almost all of the papers in his bag were crushed and crumbled in the bottom.

↬ Fortunately, or maybe unfortunately, you find only a single crumbled paper left at the bottom.

↬ A small smile peeks at your lips as you start to unfurl the paper, thinking of how he might’ve tried to clean the bag after you yelled at him for how messy and unorganized it was.

↬ But when you read the paper your smile falls and tears gather in your eyes.

↬ They start falling when you see the signatures.

↬ All seven of them.

↬ Jungkook turns around at the sound of a sob escaping you. 

↬ “Babe, what’s wrong? Did you get hu-.” 

↬ “What the fuck is this!”

↬ The boys all rush in at the sound of your voice, you have never ever raised your voice. 

↬ All of their faces pale when they take in the paper in your hands, it was extremely detailed, there was no way to make it seem like a misunderstanding.

↬ “B-Babe I know how this looks, a-and it’s bad it really is but please, let us explain.” 

↬ Namjoons shaky and desperate as he speaks, he had to tell you everything, he couldn’t— he wouldn’t let this piece of paper decide everything.

↬ But you dodged every one of his attempts to hold your arms, an incredible feat given the fact that dorms were as small as they were. 

↬ “Explain? Kim Namjoon, it’s very clear what this is, and you should know given your name is signed here.” 

↬ Hoseok's voice rang out, filled with guilt and shame, “We know what's on it, love. Hell I wrote it. But we swear, we had completely forgotten it.”

↬ Another sob ripped its way out of your chest at his words because he just confirmed it. It was obvious from the beginning but you hoped that maybe, just maybe it was a misunderstanding. 

↬ You couldn’t breath, and you most certainly couldn’t be here right now. 

↬ Jimin, always so perceptive of you and how you feel, immediately noticed and rushed to grab a water bottle. 

↬ But Tae could see how your chest was moving, as though you were being suffocated. You couldn’t breath.

↬ “Guys, let’s give her some space yea? We can talk about it without hovering over her.” 

↬ As soon as they moved away, you started pushing towards the door, being here with them wasn’t what you needed right now. 

↬ Jungkook grabbed your arm, however, stopping you from moving forward. 

↬ Looking at him you could see the desperation in his eyes while holding your arms.

↬ “I-I just I need to be alone right now. I’m sorry.” 

↬ And with that you run out of the dorms, the boys calling out after you. 

↬ And all the boys could do was glare at the crumbled paper that was on the floor. A paper that caused this mess.

↬ The boys decide they can’t lose you, no way. And so they come up with a plan, a plan to prove that this relationship is more than some fucking bet.

↬ So every morning for the next two weeks, you wake up to coffee and a muffin in your kitchen, with love notes addressed to you. Your roommate forgives the boys after one day. 

↬ Given that they have a key to your apartment, also given to them from your roommate because “their so cute!! get that dick, babe!” , it’s very easy to leave cute things for you, breakfast, presents, snacks, all accompanied by love notes that they hope tell you that you have their love. 

↬ Getting seven sweet love notes in the morning from your boyfriends-but-on-a-break-maybe(?) made you happy, but apprehension crawled up your throat and dug its claws into your heart at the thought of “this is just another piece of paper that determines my feelings.”

↬ You highly doubt they would stay with you for two years for a bet, the paper only specified two months, so you know they love you. But the idea of, the beginning of your relationship, the notes, the cute dates, wasn't all from love. Those emotions back then were one-sided. 

↬ And this probably would’ve continued longer but your roommate came home one day from her class and yelled at you about how they were waiting at the café you always loved. They said they would wait there for you but you didn’t think they’d actually do it without a response from you. 

↬ With no hesitation in mind, you get up and grab your coat while simultaneously trying to put on your shoes. As soon as your shoes are on you run out to meet the boys. 

↬ Arriving at the café you enter to see seven extremely nervous but also slightly dejected boys. One caramel iced latte sat waiting across from them, slight condensation on the outside showing there’d been waiting for a while. 

↬ Walking over you sit down in front of them, all of their eyes snapping to you with hope. Jungkook's hands reach over, ready to hold your hand after two weeks, but Jin stops him before he can. 

↬ Yoongi speaks first, right as you're about to sip the latte, “W-Wait! Let us buy you a new one! That one’s kinda watered down now and it won’t taste as good.”

↬ And you go to tell him it’s ok, that it’s your favorite and it’ll taste good anyway but he’s already up and moving to the counter, he’s so visibly shaking and you feel your heart clench. You want to hug him, tell him to breathe with you, but you can’t move. You can tell they’re afraid at the even sight of you, fear that the relationship with you is done. 

↬ “...I’m not breaking up with you all.” A simple sentence but at it, the reactions explode. Jimin starts crying,  Jungkook lunges forward and grabs your hands Namjoon and Jin are continually repeating “thank you, I love you, and i’m sorry” Yoongi drops the latte, the baristas start making another already, and he wraps his arms around you, crying into your shoulder. Hobi falls on the floor in shock. 

↬ You consider yourself and the boys lucky that the café isn’t well known and empty aside from you and the boys right now. You let the boys calm down and sit back down, Yoongi still hugging you and Jungkook's hands intertwined with your own. 

↬ You look up, wary of your next words, “Can you...can you guys explain it to me? I’m not breaking up with you, I highly doubt a bet would go on for two years and I know you all love me the way I love you now but- there’s a part of me that just needs to know how long the relationship was one-sided.” 

↬ “It didn’t even last two weeks.” Jungkook says, his grip tight and his voice strong. He goes on to explain how he technically won the bet, but he had forgotten after only two weeks of dating you. After your first date, he genuinely liked you, liked the way your eyes shined. Your soft hair and how you would shyly tuck it behind your ear when he complimented you. The cute laugh that you always hid behind your hand. He loved you before he even knew he loved you. Before you even loved him. 

↬ The relationship between you and the boys grew completely organically, the bet didn’t have any effect at all. This poly relationship was never planned, was never a part of it. But it was a happy turn of events. 

↬ You sip at your new coffee, the barista kindly brought it to you to avoid anymore accidents, “The love notes were cute, they made me feel happy through the day. I think that’s the only way I lasted through the two weeks.”

↬ Hobi pouted at that, his cheeks puffing out as he slumps with his arms crossed. “Should we not have sent them? Maybe we could have seen you earlier.” 

↬ A laugh fell from your lips at your boyfriends adorable pout. “No, I think the fact that I had the constant reminder that, yes you guys do love me, helped make me ready to talk to you all. It reminded me that, that stupid fucking paper was just that. A piece of paper. And I was getting many more pieces of paper refuting what it said. They kept me from overthinking and believing my thoughts. What did you do with the paper anyway?”

↬ “Oh, we burned it before dropping the bags off at the elementary school.”

↬ “... Can we go home?” Jimins sweet voice spoke up from where he sat. “I want to cuddle, we went two weeks without them.”

↬ Grabbing his hand with one of yours and the other holding Kooks, you all head out to cuddle at their apartment. And when it was time to head back to your apartment, arms stayed wrapped firmly around your waist. And when you put your jacket on the next morning, a piece of paper fell out. 

                                       We Love You 

#btswritingcafe #bts #bts fanfic #bts fic #namjoon #hoseok #seokjin #jimin #taehyung #yoongi #jungkook #bts fluff #bts bet au #bts poly #bts poly au

[bangtan-sonyeonddaeng]

Ghost Jungkook Reaction| You bump into him and can now see him (final)

pt.1  pt. 2  pt. 3

You woke up that morning feel more anxious than you had in a while. You were terrified for how Jungkook’s friends were going to react to the things you would tell them. 

“You nervous?” Jungkook asks. 

“That’s an understatement.” You breathe out a heavy sigh. 

“I don’t know if it helps you at all but, my friends are really nice people. I promise they won’t be mean to you. Jimin might be a little difficult at first but.. don’t give up please.”

“I won’t Jungkook, I promise. I’ll do anything I can if it means helping you and making you smile.” Jungkook looks away shyly at that, but he feels himself filled with a happiness he hasn’t felt for a long time. 

“Thank you. Seriously I don’t know if fate or whatever had anything to do with this but, meeting you is what that feels like. You’ve helped me so much just by staying with me and keeping me company but the fact that you are willing to do so much just to try and make me happy is.. overwhelming but in a good way.” You smile at him, but also feel overwhelmed with realizing just how attached you have gotten to Jungkook and enjoy his company. It makes you a little sad to think after all this is over you may not ever seen him again. Jungkook sees the sadness flash across your face if only for an instant. 

“What’s wrong y/n?”

“I’m just really going to miss you is all. This place is going to feel so empty without you in it.” Jungkook looks away, also looking rather down about all of this too. 

“Actually I wanted to talk to you about that.. I don’t know if I even want to-” Just then there is a knock on the front door.

“That must be Hoseok.” You walk over and open it, greeting Hoseok with a smile but then you notice someone new standing behind him. 

“Hoseok? Who’s that?”

“Oh, this is Namjoon. Nothing really gets past him and he kept pestering me all night asking me what was bothering me so I finally told him. He’s a very logical person and of course thought I had gone insane so I brought him here to meet you and see Jungkook for himself. He also will be a really big help in convincing the other members. He’s always sort of been like a leader and person we’ve looked up to.” 

“It’s nice to meet you y/n.” He holds his hand out and you shake it. When he smiles at you, you see his dimples and it makes you think he’s adorable. You turn around and whisper at Jungkook so they can’t hear.

“What the hell Jungkook where did you all come from? Are you all angels or something because nobody has business being that handsome.” He busts out laughing at that and you giggle along with him. Jungkook looks away blushing slightly when he realizes you also just called him handsome. Namjoon looks at you, head tilted in confusion. 

“Ah sorry. Come in Namjoon! You want to say hi to Jungkook?”

“Well, yeah I mean, I still think this is just some hoax but... I guess I’ll just have to see for myself.” He holds his hand out and Jungkook lightly touches his fingers to his. 

“Hey, hyung.” Namjoon pulls his hand back into him in shock. 

“J-Jungkook?! Is that actually you?”

“Yes it’s me.”

“But how?”

“None of us really know.” Namjoon turns his gaze to you and Hoseok.

“You were actually telling the truth. You’re not crazy. I’m not crazy.”

“Nope. I assure you we all thought the same thing.” Namjoon laughs. 

“Yeah, Hoseok told me about how this guy here kept pestering you because you ignored him. You thought he was a hallucination.”

“I still can’t believe you did that to me y/n I’m hurt.” You all laugh at that.

“It’s good to see you though Kook. I guess we better work on getting the rest of the guys here then huh?”

“Yeah... I guess so.” You fidget nervously with your hands. Jungkook approaches you and makes his hands solid for a moment to hold yours and help calm you down. 

“Y/n everything will be okay. I promise. You trust me right?” You nod your head and Jungkook lets go of you with a smile on his face.

“Um.. Hobi and Y/n do you mind if I talk to Jungkook for a second alone?”

“No that’s fine. We’ll meet you at the car Namjoonie.” You and Hoseok leave while Jungkook stands there, nervously shifting on his feet. 

“Kook you love her don’t you?” Jungkook’s lifts his eyes up to meet Namjoon’s.

“Is it that obvious?”

“To most people no, but you know how perceptive I am. You can see it in your eyes. You’re so infatuated it’s gross.” Namjoon teases him and Jungkook laughs. 

“Hyung I can’t help it. Y/n was there for me through everything. She’s so incredibly kind and caring. And you know what she said this morning? She would do anything for me if it meant I was happy and smiling. How can I not fall for her? She’s just… I’ve never met someone like her before.” 

“Hoseok said you think once you meet all the other members you’ll finally be able to move on?”

“I don’t know for sure.. it’s just a feeling I have that this is the reason I am tied here. Because I had no idea how you all were doing and how to reach you and see if you were okay.”

“So what are you going to do after we all come here and see you and you know we’re all okay? What about y/n?”

“I don’t know hyung. I’m so conflicted with everything. I want to move on. But at the same time I don’t. I want to stay here with y/n and where you all can visit me. But I know it’s selfish of me. I’m dead. I can’t give y/n the relationship she deserves and I can’t give you all the friendship you want either. I can’t leave this apartment.”

“I think y/n really cares about you too. She’s very fond of you. Her eyes get all soft when she looks at you.” Jungkook perks up at this. 

“Really? You think so?”

“I do. And I also think y/n is the type of person that would take your company and companionship over any meaningless physical relationship with someone else. Hoseok told me, before he came back here the way she talked about you.. I think she really likes you but is probably too afraid to get attached because there is a good possibility after tonight you won’t be here anymore.” 

“I guess I better make up my mind while you guys are gone then huh?”

“Yeah I think that would be for the best. Do something that will make you happy, Jungkook. If that’s staying here, then do that. If it’s moving on, then that’s okay too. We won’t forget about you. Ever.” Namjoon holds his hand out and Jungkook reaches out to grab his too, giving it a comforting squeeze. 

“Thank you, Namjoon. You always know just what to say to keep my mind at ease. I think I know what I want.. but I’ll wait until you guys get back and think it over for sure.” Namjoon smiles. 

“Alright Jungkookie. Take care of yourself. I’ll be back soon.”

You are standing in Hoseok's apartment now and there are six sets of eyes all on you. You rock back and forth on the balls of your feet nervously, staring down at them and not meeting anyone’s eyes. 

“U-um. I’m s-sure you all are wondering who I am and wh-why I’m here.” Hoseok places a hand on your shoulder and gives you an encouraging smile. 

“It’s okay y/n. I can talk to them if you want to.” You nod, and begin fidgeting with your bracelet. 

“Wait a minute. Why does she have Jungkook’s bracelet?” Taehyung stands off the couch and begins making his way towards you and you flinch. He immediately stops. 

“Taehyung sit down. This is really overwhelming for y/n right now. I’ll explain everything.” 

“You’re right.. I’m sorry y/n. Please go ahead and you both tell us whatever you need to.”

“Well, I bumped into y/n here at the coffee shop and I saw the bracelet too. So of course I confronted her on it because, why the heck did she have our Jungkookie’s bracelet? I was livid at first. Thought she had stolen it or something or was stalking me but then she explained everything. And I know it is going to sound crazy but I assure you everything she is going to tell you is true.” 

“It is.” Namjoon adds. “I saw it with my own eyes as well. So did Hoseok. Go ahead y/n tell them.” 

And so you do. You tell them about how you moved into his apartment, how you had met Jungkook, how you continued to stay with him because you genuinely cared about him and would never abandon him or hurt him. You wanted to make sure all of his friends knew that because you could see how much they all cared about him. Just the mention of his name caused their eyes to glaze over as if they were lost in memories. When you finish telling them no one speaks. It’s so quiet you can hear a pin drop. Jimin is the first to break the silence. 

“Is this some kind of joke? Some way to try and make me feel better about the whole thing because if it is that’s really messed up. I know you all are worried about me because I have been secluding myself in my room and gave up dancing but this is just too much.” He goes to leave but you call after him. 

“Jimin wait! Please just look at this.” You hold out the piece of paper Jungkook had wrote incase his friends didn’t believe you. Jimin reads it over and when he sees the drawing at the bottom tears well up in his eyes. 

“T-that’s Jungkook’s handwriting. That’s Cooky. Oh my god. Are you three actually telling the truth? He has been at his apartment the whole time and we just abandoned him?!”

“Hey, Jimin no don’t think like that.” Jin places a hand on his shoulder to soothe him. 

“He doesn't see it that way at all. He just misses you. All of you. That’s why he’s still here because he wants to make sure you all are okay.”

“Can we go see him? Now? Please?” Taehyung looks at you with pleading eyes and you nod.

“Of course you can. That’s why I came here so I could take you all back to the apartment to see him.” 

“I’ll believe it when I see it. I’m not getting my hopes up.” Yoongi states as he stands off the couch. “Once you’re dead you don’t come back. You probably just miss him so much you’re buying into the delusions of this psycho.” 

“Yoongi!” Namjoon scolds him. 

“I’m just speaking my mind. I’ll go to humor you all and be here for you when you realize this is all just a lie and your hearts break all over again.” He walks towards the door and opens it. “Well? Are you all coming or not?” Gradually the rest of the guys stand up and head out the door. You are left in the apartment processing everything. You ask Hoseok to give you a minute and he nods, leaving you alone. Or at least you thought. You see a head of blonde hair enter your field of vision. 

“Jimin?”

“Um.. I just wanted to ask you is Jungkook.. mad at me? Does he blame me? I’m the one who asked him to stay later with me at the studio and I’m the reason he-” His voice cracks and a sob escapes him. You can’t help but want to comfort him so you reach out and hold his hand. 

“Jimin no. No no he isn’t mad at you. He doesn’t blame you at all for what happened. We talked about it one night and he wanted me to assure you of that. He really wants to tell you in person though. I think the words would mean more coming from him.” Jimin nods his head and rubs the tears away from his eyes. Before you can process what is happening you are enveloped in a tight hug. You are shocked, and it takes you a moment to reciprocate the hug but gradually your arms lift up and wrap around his waist. 

“Thank you for taking care of him these past months. He might not show it but he gets lonely really easily so having you there.. I’m sure it means a lot to him.” You can’t help the smile that spreads across your face and Jimin smiles back. 

“Ready to go?” 

“Yeah. I’m ready. Let’s go meet the others.”

You all are standing outside the apartment door now. You turn back to look at them.

“Are you guys ready?” They nod. You open the door and Jungkook is already sat there on the couch. He looks around the group as if to make sure everyone is there and then sighs in relief. 

“You really did it. You all really came for me.”

“Of course they did. They love you and care about you so much.” 

“And Jimin?”

“Jimin’s not the problem it’s this grump right here.” Hoseok says as he pinches Yoongi’s cheek. He slaps his hand away. Jungkook rolls his eyes and walks over to Yoongi and places his hand on his shoulder. Yoongi tenses and his eyes widen in shock.

“What the fuck?!” He backs up until his back is pressed against the wall. “You really were telling the truth?”

“...Yeah I was. I wouldn’t lie to you all about something like this. What reason would I have to hurt you when I don’t know any of you?” Yoongi’s gaze softens. 

“I’m sorry y/n. I shouldn’t have said those things to you.”

“It’s okay. I understand you were just confused and hurt.” 

“Jungkook I can’t believe this.. you’re still here. How are you? Are you okay?”

“I’m fine hyung. But more important how are you?” A small smile forms on Yoongi’s face.

“I’m good. Now I’m good.” 

“Hey Jungkook if you can hear us can you just like, bump into the rest of us now so we can see you too and join the conversation. Don’t leave your favorite hyung waiting!” Jin calls out. Jungkook laughs and walks around his circle of friends touching their arms until they all can see him now. They all begin laughing and talking animatedly with one another, like nothing had even changed between them all. Jimin still seems to be in shock. He’s standing quietly away from everyone, staring at Jungkook with an unreadable expression. You walk over to him and place a hand on his shoulder.

“Jimin? Are you okay?” He nods.

“I just can’t believe he’s there. My best friend is right here… that I thought I lost forever is right in front of me and I have no idea what to say to him.”

“Would it be easier for you to talk to him alone?” Jimin nods. You clear your throat loudly and everyone turns to look at you.

“Um, you guys? Why don’t we let Jimin and Jungkook talk for a second okay?” They look at Jimin and see how overwhelmed he looks and agree. You tell Jungkook he can take him to his room to talk private. As soon as the bedroom door shuts Jimin breaks down. 

“Jungkookie how can you not hate me? I’m the reason you’re dead. If I wouldn’t had insisted on staying late for practice we wouldn’t have been walking in that area when that guy was driving. We would have been home safely.. I just don’t understand.” 

“Jimin I don’t blame you at all. It wasn’t your fault. It was that guy’s fault for getting behind the wheel drunk. You did nothing wrong. I could never hate you, you’re my best friend. And my favorite hyung. Just don’t you dare tell Jin that he’ll bring me back to life just to kill me again.” Jimin giggles at that, wiping his tears away. “Why did you stop dancing?”

“Because it reminded me too much of you and what happened. Dancing is the reason you’re dead and I couldn’t.. I couldn’t do it anymore. Every time I left the studio I was a complete wreck so I just quit.”

“But don’t you miss it? Dancing was like your life force and you were so good at it. I loved watching you dance.” Jimin sighs as he considers his words. 

“I do miss it.. a lot. But I just don’t know if I can.”

“Will you try? For me? Please? I don’t want to have to constantly be wondering if you’re happy. And dancing makes you happy.” Jimin smiles. 

“Yeah. Yeah I’ll try. I promise.” Jimin holds out is pinky and Jungkook smiles, linking their fingers together. “Oh! Why can I feel your hand?”

“I can make parts of me solid for a short period of time but it takes a lot of energy so I don’t do it every often.”

“Ah that’s cool.” Jimin’s expression suddenly changes and he gives Jungkook a cheeky smile. “So you and y/n?” Jungkook blushes and looks away.

“What about me and y/n?”

“Oh come on she’s totally your type! And she’s really sweet and cares about you an awful lot.”

“It doesn’t matter Jimin. I’m dead I can’t give her a normal relationship.”

“Something tells me she wouldn't care about that.” 

“Namjoon hyung said the same thing..” There’s a silence that settles over them as Jimin seems to be thinking about something. 

“Are you really going to leave now?”

“I don’t think so. I want to stay here with all of you and with y/n. I really like her. Maybe even love her.. But this is so complicated I don’t even know what to say to her.”

“Just be honest Kookie. Tell her how you feel. I’m sure she feels the same way. If I promise to dance again I want you to promise me you’ll tell her after we all leave.” 

“Okay. I promise.” Jimin smiles and stands up. 

“I’ll see you another time then?” 

“Yes. I’m going to stay. So you can see me whenever you want to hyung.” They both step out of the room now and back into the living room. They all stay for a while longer, catching up on things Jungkook had missed and before long it is becoming late into the evening. 

“Well, we should probably go then. See you next weekend Jungkook?”

“Sure! I would love to see you guys again.” You tilt your head in confusion at Jimin. 

“Wait what? Jungkook I thought-”

“And that’s our cue to go! Come on you guys let’s give these two some time alone.” Jimin ushers everyone out of the apartment and throws a wink at Jungkook over his shoulder.

“What was he talking about? Aren't you leaving?” Jungkook pats the spot on the couch next to him and you sit facing him. 

“I don’t want to leave. I kind of like it here. My friends all know I’m here and I know they’re going to be okay now. I don’t want to just leave them after they finally got to see me again. And... Most of all I don’t want to leave you.” Your heart flutters in your chest. “I really like spending time with you. I love your company. I don’t feel that lonely ache in my chest anymore because you were the missing piece that filled in that gap. I guess, what I'm saying is that along the way I developed feelings for you. But I know our relationship wouldn’t be anything conventional so if you want to move out I completely understand. Who wants to live in a house with a ghost who fell in love with them-”

“I would.” 

“What?”

“I would love to live in a house with a ghost who fell in love with me. Because I have feelings for him too.” Jungkook eyes widen.

“You.. you love me too?”

“How could I not? You’re so sweet and kind to me. You take care of me as best as you can. I don’t care that our relationship won’t be normal. I don’t want that if it means I don’t get to have you. The companionship and happiness you make me feel means so much more to me than any ‘normal’ relationship someone else could offer. And when you kissed me on my forehead… I haven’t felt butterflies like that in my life.” Jungkook looks away, feeling embarrassed.

“I thought you were asleep..”

“I was until you kissed me. But I pretended to still be asleep because I didn’t want you to freak out.”

“So... does this mean we’re together then?”

“If you want us to be. I would really like that.”

“You really don’t care that I’m dead? That we won't be able to uh... have much of a physical relationship?”

“No. I mean yeah it sucks I can’t hug you for more than a few minutes but, you did cook me breakfast and dinner before so you can make parts of you solid for longer periods of time right?” You wiggle your eyebrows at him and Jungkook grabs a pillow and throws it at you. You both burst out laughing at that. 

“I’m just messing with you, Jungkook. No I really am not bothered by that. I love you for who you are. And you really are an amazing person.” Jungkook leans and presses his lips against yours and you absolutely melt into the kiss, loving the way his lips feel on yours. He pulls away after a few moments and is beaming at you. 

“Are you going to stay then Kookie?”

“Yes I am going to stay.. But please just promise me if this ever becomes too much for you to deal with or if you find someone else.. who’s alive then you can leave. I just want you to be happy.”

“There is no happiness for me without you in my life. I promise I’m not going anywhere. I’ll be here with you till the end. Then we can both haunt this apartment together.” Jungkook giggles at that, but he feels a warmth spreading throughout his chest at the prospect of being with you even in the afterlife. He reaches out and laces your fingers together, sighing happily at the touch. 

“I feel like I owe you so much y/n. Because of you I was able to see my friends again. Jimin is going to start dancing again! Everyone is happy. I’m happy. So incredibly happy I could scream right now and it’s all because of you. Are you sure you aren’t an angel?” You chuckle at that.

“No I am not. But I am pretty sure you must be and aren’t actually a ghost. Because of you I can also say that I am truly happy now.” 

“Well good. Because I intend to do whatever I can to make you happy. For a long long time. And besides! I am the best boyfriend you know? You won’t ever have to worry if I am cheating on you, I can cook for you when you have a hard day at work and am home all the time so we can spend the days together...!” You smile fondly at him as he rambles off all of the reasons he would be a good boyfriend, just as he had before when he was convincing you to live with him and how he would be he best roommate. You’ve come a long way since that day, and in this moment you know, everything you’ll ever need is right here in front of you in the form of bunny smiles, soft forehead kisses, and gentle touches.

#bts reaction #bts scenario #bts scenarios #bts imagine #bts imagines #bts #Jungkook scenario #jungkook reaction #jungkook imagine #jeon jeongguk #jeon jungkook #reader x jungkook #jungkook x reader

[kanene-yaaay]

I’m not ticklish!!

Kanene’s note: Yeah, yeah, I have like: two braincells to made titles and they are on vacations at this exact moment, sO-

Warnings, fun facts, random things and stuff:

* Lee!Logan and Ler!Virgil (It can be seen as Romantic or Platonic Analogical).

* Hmmm… This is a Tickle-Fanfic! If you don’t like this kind of stuff, please look for another blog, there are plenty of amazing art in this site! Like, for real. It’s stunning! ‘u’).

* Something around 1500 words. -w-)b.

* Sorry for any spelling, pontuation and grammar mistakes! Any advice is very very welcome!

* I just realized I haven’t written any Analogical tickles with Lee!Logan, and???? S h a m e   o n   m e . So I finally decided to change it. It’s a very silly plot, but I kind of had fun writing, soooo... Someday will make a teasy tickle fanfic, I promisse xDDD.

* E a versão em português ainda está em reforma! Thankys for reading, my lollipops! Play games, don’t cheat, run under some rain and don’t forget to drink water! Byeioo!~

                                [~*~]

 Thomas has a crush.

 - You aren’t tickling… however I can’t help myself but smile every time I’m near to you. – Logan stared at the computer, lightly biting his lower lip, habit that showed up only when he was nervous. – Do you think this is adequate?

 Virgil only dignited his being to roll his eyes, something that, even if the logic side wasn’t with his eyes captured by the severe amount of sites explaining about feelings, reading profusely every bit of information he could pursuit, the said wouldn’t be able to see since the purple lover decided to lay upside down in the bed, half of him almost falling from the furniture, being almost the fifth or sixth strange position he tried in order to best erase the pain in his back and attempt to change something due the enormous hours both spent in that same conversation.

 - Uhh. This is ridiculous. Are you really trying to find a flirt to every subject that could be brought up in a normal conversation? Tickles? You are taking this too far, and that is something coming from me. Go to sleep, Logan.

- Absolutely not. Any and every point can be crucial in a competition.

 Okay, let us recapitulate: Thomas has a crush and of course, the sides would take advantages of this. No long time ago, it has been proclaimed in all the Mind Palace the start of the ‘Love Games~’ what is, primarily, a series of challenges where who blushed first lost the match and a specifically amount of points (depending of the difficult of the challenge), however, it was possible to recapture or accumulate more points doing random flustering action through the day, as gifts, flirts, carts… anything that leaded the features of the victim be set in flames. Patton and Roman ganged up to explain how much this activity could be essential in order to help to build self-love and the others sides simply couldn’t find something to deny it.

 (Actually, Virgil could think in a great bunch of reasons why all of this could being a very bad idea, but now, think about it and convince them to stop when this competition would mean Free Crofters to Logan, Free Praises to Roman and just Patton showing them all the love he could give was a totally different story. Without telling that he would do anything to see Janus becoming a flushed mess and part of himself was kind of curious to see if someone would succeed in making the Gremlin Boy blush.)

 And, being really sincere, the one wearing hoodie was impressed with how much all the Light Sides matched with the Others in being competitive, until this day Roman already had made five serenates, Patton obtained a good amount of points only with his gifts and zero notion of personal space, Janus got almost everyone with his ‘Appear from absolutely nowhere, grabs your chin, stares intensely, grins, kisses your forehead and go away’ and Virgil kept himself well with his victories in the commons challenges. The embodiment of Flight or Fight instinct have no idea about what Remus was preparing, but as it seems Logan was trying to get in the ranking beginning and winning Flirt Wars.

 - Albeit, I believe you are correct. I’m not even ticklish for this saying.

 Virgil almost fell of the other’s bed with the astonished laughter that escaped from his lips.

 - I choose to ignore your mocking, thank you. – Pointed Logan, his voice in slightly traces of irritation.

 - Mocking? – The one wearing hoodie gave a half spin, sitting normally in a blink of eye. – I’m just laughing about something that clearly is a lie.

 - I think this is an information that doesn’t belong to you.

 Virgil scoffed, rising one eyebrow as he rested his chin in his hand.  

 - I am not ticklish!! – Logan repeated, feeling a bit childish with the tune chosen to defend himself, or perhaps it was the turn this conversation was taking.

 An evilly grin, a bit alike the Cheshire Cat, darkly gleamed in the other’s feature.

 - So you would mind a little… experiment, am I right?

 The logical aspect gulped, adjusting his tie and deviating their glare for a piece of moment.

 - A-absolutely no.

 Fingers quickly found way to his neck, scratching so lightly that barely touched his skin, going up, circling that exact spot behind his ears and appreciating the surprised squeal that floated from Logan’s mouth before focusing some special wriggles in that place. However, don’t taking too much before going down fluttering towards under his chin and in the base of his neck the best he could with the other shrugging and ducking his head in a hope to stop his big wobbly smile to be seen. Movement which also prevented the ‘not ticklish’ one to notice one of Virgil’s hands to travel to his back, being quick in landing spidery tickles in his lower back, sometimes slipping to give his ribs some pokes and prodding, something that finally bring up the babbled giggles to the daylight.

 - -Nahahahahahahahaha!! Viihihihihihihihirgihihihihil!! – And he squirmed, the sensation being as unbearable to ignore as too much good to escape. It was almost… relaxing. In a very electric way.

 - Tsc. – The anxious aspect let go a chuckle, still not believing in how the scene unfold before his eyes, albeit absolutely hypnotized with how the high squeaks and snorts intertwined the low giggles from the usually so contained side. Virgil’s thumbs applied a light pressure in the other’s spine, the attacker smugly watching how this leaded to a gasp as Logan jumped and arched his back, quickly starting to knead and buzz his fingers in each one of the ‘victim’ vertebras, following all the way up, totally unbothered by the, now very much increased, squirming. – And who would say that the embodiment of rationality just need some few tickles to become a helpless, giggly puddle, huh?

 - Shuhuhuhuhuhut uhuhuhACK!!! – The purple lover found a particularly sensitive space between his shoulder blades, being responded by Logan’s loud, and endearing childish, laughter as its owner struggled more to be free from the malefic, tickly fingers, obligating Virgil to wrap an arm around his waist and without mercy squeeze his hips in random, quick patterns. – NonononHOHOHOHOHO! PLEHEHEHEHEHEHE-

 - But what is the matter, Logan? – His voice was a whisper, although not only because it sent shivers down his victim’s spine, but also because he wasn’t really certain that the one with glasses could really hear him in any other way with how much he trashed and crackled, as it seems these two spots being one of his most sensitive ones. – Didn’t you just said you aren’t ticklish? – He gave him a break, going to his ribs in spidering, soft tickles, being sure to surprise Logan now and then with sudden pokes between them. Logan used the opportunity to breathe more evenly, even with the giggly fit and flames that took over his body. – But…no! Maybe you were lying? Perhaps this… - The grin in his lips was almost perceptible in his low tune, the words slowly rolling over his tongue as he digged into his armpits and got a surprised yelp as answer, the giggles getting louder and switched to laughter as its owner shook his head, denying. – can tickle tickle tickle tickle you silly?

 The ‘I’m always serious, necktie!’ clapped his arms at his sides and hided his red face and wide smile in his hands. Virgil felt the grin painted in his face only get bigger. Now he was just making this too much easy.

 The one wearing hoodie took a deep breath and released a raspberry right on his poor, forgotten and defenseless neck, the vibrations hitting every single one of his ticklish nerves and leading to a serious shriek to run from Logan’s mouth.

 - VIRGIHIHIHIHIHIHIHIHIHIHIL!!! NAHAhahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHahahahaHA!! – Logan squirmed until finally escaped and fell in the bed: butterflies flying in his belly, smile from an ear to another, remain giggles, watery, shiny eyes and… a blush that painted his entire face.

 - Thank you for the new score, mister ‘I’m not ticklish’~ - Virgil teased as laid comfortably whilst the mattress, crossing his arms and using them as a pillow while closed his eyes and ignored Logan’s annoyed grumble.

 … And also the way his eyes instantly gleamed when they focused in his unprotected stomach and sides, an evil smile creeping its way to his lips.

#Lee!Logan #Ler!Virgil #Come on Logan you should know where this would bring you #Ticklish!Logan #Tickle Fanfic #Sanders Sides Tickling #Janus Mention #Remus Mention #Patton Mention #Roman Mention #They are silly boys #Fluff #Oneshot #KaneneFic #KaneneArt #English

[dontgotothenetherworld]

ap psychology

anonymous asked:  Can I request readers putting all her studying off till the week before AP exams and she starts studying an unhealthy amount, like sometimes forgetting to eat all day because of it and even made herself sick from stress over it but reader refuses to complain because she did it to herself and Lydia's just there helping her review and making sure she takes time to care for herself ect? Bonus if Reader thinks she did bad and Lydia assuring her she did fine and has an 'i told you don't moment? 

anonymous asked: Totally didn't request that bc that's my situation-

for some reason when i tried to queue this w/ the original ask, tumblr wanted to put the cut in the ask and i couldn’t delete it

this is out of date now, but i was uninspired to write for a hella long time sorry. also! i’m going to draw from my experiences w/ ap this year, and the only ap exam i had to take was psych, so that’s also going to be the case for reader :)

also, i feel like my lydia is a bit out of character? idk it’ll probably take a while to get back to the way i used to write her.

1303 words

cw: femreader. food

you cursed under your breath. months ago, months! you told yourself you would start studying for your ap exam. you only had the one exam to study for, so you told yourself that if you just did a little bit everyday, you would be fine.

but here you were, about three days until your ap psychology exam, and you hadn’t studied any of it. you had hardly even watched the videos your teacher had posted as the digital learning content. but to be fair, the stuff he was talking about in them were the last unit or two of psych, and you wouldn’t have to worry about them, because you weren’t going to be tested on them.

you groaned and dragged your feet downstairs, to where you hid your backpack. the friday weeks ago, when your school told everyone that classes would go digital for a few weeks because of the coronavirus, your teacher had come prepared. he gave everyone that showed up to class, which, granted, wasn’t that many but still- a huge packet covering everything that you had studied this year. it was some forty pages long.

okay, it was, like, thirty five because you crossed out the pages about personality and disorders. which was a shame, because those are the units that everyone takes psychology to learn about. no one goes, “oh boy, i can’t wait to learn about how to test if a baby has depth perception!” or “i can’t wait to learn about all the different types of visual illusions!” but whatever.

you flipped to page thirty five, to see how many questions you were in for. just over 250, except that’s counting all the charts as individual questions. yeah, that makes sense. one and a half pages of listing what researchers discovered what is equivalent to answering which cortex of the brain processes visual stimuli.

wait a minute. lydia was also taking psych. studying sucks, but if you could do it with your girlfriend, that’d be so much less painful.

you texted her, “hey lyds, have u finished the psych packet yet?”

”yea i finished it yesterday, why?” she texted back almost immediately.

shit. looks like you’ll have to suffer through this alone. “nvm”

you looked at the time, 1:46. damn, already? it felt like you had only just woken up. you made yourself a coffee, and set up shop on the desk you have never used in your bedroom, with laptop open beside you. you planned on googling everything, rather than going through your notes, mostly because you forgot where you put them, but this would still take ages.

an hour passed, and you felt like you were dying on the inside. if you had to answer one more question about behavioral psych, you were going to scream. behavioral psych is by far the worst part of psychology! watson and skinner be damned! people are people not some computer code! people have feelings! you can’t just ignore them! and the feeling you were feeling right now was not a good one!

you wanted to stop, but you weren’t sure if you stopped now if you’d be able to finish the packet. so you kept on going.

you went another five hours, taking five minute tik tok breaks every hour to keep you sane. you looked at the clock, and realized you hadn’t eaten anything today. you grabbed a box of cheez-its and made your way back upstairs, and went back to work. this time, you ate a cheez-it every time you finished a question, or you filled out a row in a chart.

you didn’t know when you fell asleep, but you woke up in the morning with about half the packet filled out. considering the exam was in one day, and four-ish hours, you thought that was good.

as you made your morning coffee, you checked the messages lydia had sent you. “are you doing okay? normally we talk a lot but…” “wait, are you working on the study guide?” “y/n! please take breaks! remember! you need food!” “and water!”

you sent back, “if i eat my cheez-its, and i drink my coffee while i study, then i don’t have to take breaks.”

you went back to your desk, and plugged your phone in across the room so you wouldn’t be distracted. but also because you forgot to charge it before you passed out, so it was at three percent, because apparently you had kept it open to tik tok all night, and the video just kept looping. oops.

for a while, the studying seemed easier. you felt like you had less to do, and you didn’t need to worry about getting it done in time, because you had more than enough of it. but because you didn’t need to rush, you became more productive.

you finished the second half of the packet by six that evening. you do admit, you got a bit lazy in the last few pages, but it was done!

shit. studying isn’t just writing stuff down, you have to read it over, right? you don’t really study that much.

but you decided to take an hour or two’s break for… breakfast? dinner? maybe even lunch? whatever, leftover pizza, because you had just only now just realized the intense rumbling in your stomach.

you checked your phone for the first time in hours. you were actually kind of proud of yourself. you usually were on your phone every waking hour, which was probably a problem, but you had shown enormous restraint… by spending every waking hour staring at your laptop. it’s all about choosing your battles.

you quickly dismissed some twitter notifications before tapping on a new message from lydia. “babe, i’m getting really worried about you, please call me when you see this.” you furrowed your brows. worried? about you? why?

you called lydia, and she picked up nearly immediately.

”y/n!” she gasped with relief, “don’t do that to me again!”

you felt stupid for wondering what she was talking about, but you kind of needed to know, “what do you mean?”

”you’ve been offline for hours, and i couldn’t get to you! and then when i heard what you were eating, that got me worried. have you eaten today?”

”three slices of pizza right now.” you swallowed a bite.

”is that your first meal today?”

”unless you count coffee, yeah. i’ll do better tomorrow, i promise. speaking of tomorrow, we’ve got the psych exam, and i need to keep studying. i’ll call after the exam, so like three?”

”y/n.”

”yeah?”

”you do realize this exam is online, right? and at home?”

”uh, yeah.” you swallowed.

”and you have both a laptop and a phone?”

”lydia, what are you saying?” cheating. she was definitely talking about cheating.

”i’m saying, that you don’t really need to know the definitions, because our dear old pal google can be there to help you out with those. and you’re smart, so i assume you know the concepts.”

”you think very highly, of me, my dear.” you took another bite of pizza. “so, what you’re saying is, i wasted two days studying?”

”yes, that is exactly what i’m saying.”

”shit. wait, why were you studying?”

”ugh, because i am nowhere near as good as you at being able to understand things.”

”you know, definitions explain the concept too.”

”what are you saying?” asked lydia.

”i think we’ve both wasted a lot of time studying when we didn’t need to.”

”fuck.” lydia breathed.

”yeah, we’re both idiots. do you wanna watch something on netflix? you haven’t finished parks and rec yet, right?”

”no, i just finished an episode before you called me.”

”which one?”

”season four, episode seven.”

”wait, is the next episode smallest park? we need to watch that, like, now.”

@meangirlsx @meangirlmurphy @eliza-is-confused @boredomimi @book--butterfly

#beetlejuice #beetlejuice musical #beetlejuice braodway #beetlejuice fanfiction #lydia #lydia deetz #lydia x reader #lydia deetz x reader #fic

[drivenchaos]

things a new rp partner should know about me !

fun new meme here ! write 3-5 things a new rp partner (or those who want to be) should know about you and tag 3-5 people! it should be related to rp and not to other interests.

tagged by:  @kissafist (thank uuuu og!!!) tagging:  I swear everybody I know has been tagged so if u see this and haven’t done it, pls, it shall be an honorary tag

I.   I really like taking canon characters and adding my own ideas to them. so that might mean that my ideas may or may not vibe with you -- but that’s okay!! maybe it doesn’t make sense to you either -- but that’s also okay!!! at the end of the day, people have different perceptions of the same thing -- and that’s okay!!!!! I heavily prioritize my own hcs and while I do love the og game, there are some things that feel a bit off for me + I feel like should have been expanded upon.

II.    i’m pretty slow most of the time. I also have another blog that i’m trying to maintain so I won’t be the fastest when it comes to replying to stuff. I like to take long breaks sometimes. this also involves any IMs or discord messages -- sometimes I will take a loooong time to reply. that is simply because i’m not in the mood to respond, but that never ever means i’m ignoring you. most of the time, it’s just anxiety. or i’m trying very hard to think of a cool response but failing miserably. if you’re getting antsy tho, please pester me. I do not mind!! I will never mind!!! i’m a very chill person.

III.    i’m a very open person. i’m down for pretty much anything that isn’t illegal or extremely questionable. i’m also someone that abuses exclamation points and question marks and emojis. it’s bizarre because i’m actually super quiet in real life. but i’m loud as fuck on this platform??? wild. but yeah!! I tried to look scary on my rules page and every time I go there I laugh so hard because of the lack of enthusiasm. I also like to keysmash a lot and use memes as my coping mechanism. I hope that doesn’t bother y’all hehe. i’m just a young gal starting her twenties.

IV.      I will interact with anybody from any fandom!! deadass!!!!! square up if you think i’m lying. that being said, I do enjoy plotting every now and then. it’s fun to plot!!! but i’m a very boring and dry person and my ideas tend to be a little more...selfish?? like I mostly have ideas for vincent himself but not how vincent will interact with other characters. but I try my gosh darn hardest!! so if I’m taking a while to reply to a plotting thingy, please just wait a bit. i’m trying to access all three of my brain cells at once.

V.  I am multi-ship -- that being said, I have no idea if vince is gonna allow me to ship him with anybody. I tend to prefer to see if any natural feelings stir up instead of plotting for it. call me a hopeless romantic, but I find it cute when my muse suddenly starts taking an interest in someone without me having to plot it out. 

#.where the drugs at tho (ooc) #im nice #I promise #im very funny

[alchemist-shizun]

So uhh I had a train of thought and I just really needed to let it out please note that this is very long so beware before you decide to click “read more” and yeah as for contents this is just really me venting about the fact that I’ve prevented myself from drawing since forever and I can’t really stand it any longer (there might be many mistakes but I don’t expect anyone to read this) really just ignore it

Fuck it fuck it fuck them i dont C a r e ™ I’ve had enough i can’t fucking believe they made me feel like this still to this day I haven’t even talked to them in years and because of them I’m still not over it so honestly fuck you elementary teachers and your stupid fucking way of twisting a child’s perception of thing on their way of shaping themselves cause you ruined a perfectly creative child is what you did

Okay so this dates back to, yes you read, elementary school but oh actually let’s get to kindergarten first

I was coloring a lion picture, I was like 4 but I still freaking remember it to this day, the teacher there told me I did it wrong and I didn’t understand why, I got scolded for fucking c o l o r i n g COLORS, I WAS F O U R it wasn’t like a colored a lion BLUE I used typical lion colors what do you want from me?

So I tried again, unsure of what to do, unsure of everything, I color it again, and as if nothing changed I get scolded again and you want to know what they had the courage to do? The fucking hypocrisy? They sent me to the part of preschool you can go when you’re like 2 or 3 TO SIGNIFY THAT I WAS STUPID and to make me feel ashamed of myself for something that I had no clue about cause nobody cared to explain what I did wrong

I still remember how fucking bad I felt, I might have cried too, I don’t know anymore

Fun fact? I recently heard someone else had the same experience

Now what the fuck? What the fuck? Do you know how impactful something like that is on a 4 year old child? Did you not learn how to treat kids in university? Fucking hell you should’ve studied this kind of things, how am I supposed to react to that kind of shaming?

And now let’s go to elementary school. Everything fucking SUCKED in the attitude of the two main teachers I had.

Basically in here you had to write your name, date, class, daily stuff basically on top of the page every time, and right under these things before you start writing or anything you have to do what in Italian we say “cornicetta” that I can literally translate with “little frame”

Basically it was a very tiny drawing you did and you repeated it horizontally so that you had some kind of frame on a single side of the page

And I was terrible at them. I don’t know, I didn’t have the hand of the artist™ what could I do about it? I was just 6. And my teachers? Batshit crazy. My Italian and history teacher in particular, she absolutely hated my drawings

Everything I did didn’t please her at all, the frames I made were always criticized and thank god I don’t remember all of her comments cause if I did I’d probably still be upset over them

There’s one in particular I remember: I think we were making a drawing for history, cause I remember drawing a cave and some people, so I might have been in second or third year. I had started to color it and my teacher came up, inspected it and said “ah it was actually a good drawing, too bad you had to ruin it with colors”

How am I fucking supposed to feel about that? Do I have to yell in joy and say woah you’re absolutely right I must bow to your genius. N O fuck you that’s what I was supposed to say! I wasn’t encouraged in the slightest.

She made me feel like shit and fucking laughed like she was pleased to fuck around with my sanity. Thank you very much you idiot now I’m terrified of drawing anything at all, this is what you created, you happy??

Not only she never gave me constructive criticism on my drawings, but she also insulted my handwriting over and over along with the one of some others, threatening us to go back to writing with the pencil instead of the pen like everyone else

Again, you can imagine how I fucking felt.

You don’t know how many afternoons I spent with my mother writing words in the exact manner my teacher wanted over and over because those were the sick punishments they gave us

Writing some words like 50 times

Sure, it can be practice, but God fucking damn it

I can understand when they said “hey you did a spelling error, how about you write this word like 20 times so that you get used to it” alright

But you don’t make a child sit for hours trying to fill entire pages of stupid senseless words making them feel even more ashamed and stupid than they already felt

It was dreadful for me and even my mother was pissed at that. Not that she didn’t criticize my handwriting either but she gave up after some time

Also, as if elementary wasn’t enough, we had a young teacher at catechism that dared to give us fucking homework LIKE THAT’S NOT EVEN A NORMAL THING none else in the world did that okay n o o n e

And she gave fucking marks, ofc my marks fucking sucked and I hated going there (my parents only made me go so that I could have done all the required things if I ever wanted to get married in church once adult)

Moral of the story, don’t trust catechism teachers if they’re like mine (also my parents hated her)

I don’t know when I stopped drawing, probably after elementary school, since I didn’t have to do those page frames anymore.

But with middle school came art lessons

Art lessons with the teacher I had meant no history of art at all for all the three years and only making art

I hated it, I sucked at everything, my drawing repulsion (if that’s a term I can use) grew stronger with all the years and the teacher I had also wasn’t professional at all so she gave marks based on how much she liked you

Despite all of this, there was a moment in first year of middle school where this teacher fell down the stairs and broke her leg, so we had a substitute: young, sweet lady that I instantly fell in love with

She made us do a project for a group of people we call “alpini” which is a particular group that helped in the war and fought in the north of Italy, in particular in the Alps.

I had a very artistic classmate, her mother was literally and artist and obviously I stood no chance against her, so I was like well I’m not gonna end up in noe place so, let’s just do this for fun I guess

I made this stupid little concept I had in my head, nothing special really, especially since I also drew people and I have no clue of how bodies work in art, but okay

Wanna know something?

I fucking won

I don’t know how, but I fucking won and I still have the prize

But then, the other teacher came back and everything was back to being shitty.

When it was time to choose highschool I was a bit scared cause my course would have had lessons of history of art since the first year and I had never had one while everybody else would have

I was afraid I wouldn’t have liked the subject

Let me tell you, it’s probably my favorite subject by now, and I’m at the last year. I was afraid I wouldn’t have been able to do anything with it, that if I liked history of art the only available universities where the academies that required you to have drawing skills

Then I came to know of the existence of the Cultural Heritage faculty and I couldn’t have been happier

But lately I’m still here thinking what if I actually tried to not listen to the people around me and practice my drawing skills ever since I was little?

I am so fucking sorry for myself because I lost a potential I know I could’ve grown to something probably very beautiful and I will never be able to see it bloom

And you know what? I don’t fucking care I’m so done with this feeling and I want to get rid of it so I don’t care if I’m 18 you can start whenever you want to do things

So I’m gonna start to teach myself how to draw after 18 years of my life and I’m going to see how it turns out and I will fucking stop being absolutely scared of picking up pencils

I’ll stop hearing my past teachers voices in my head saying it’s no use and that I should give up because they’re absolutely horrible and I hate them in particular

I don’t care that’s it this time I’m doing it, I don’t want to be conditioned by stupid people or be submissive anymore

And to those teachers, an honest and wholehearted fuck you, in your face.

#vent post #tw caps #tw negativity #ellie vents #not ts #tw toxic people #art #tw swearing #long post

[wafflelate]

how about Sai and Naruto hanging out together after the orange boy gets back from his trip. Shikako isn't there, it's just them. They can maybe talk about shikako for a bit, but I think it'd be cool to see how they interact when they have been so changed by her even if they arent talking/thinking about her? An exploration of who they grew to be and are growing into? thx boo

ABSOLUTELY. Thank u for this wonderful prompt, friend.

word count: 1,528

                      ————————————

These days, Naruto is a little more worldly. These days, he knows that Ichiraku has the best ramen in the Land of Fire not just out of a deep, personal conviction but because he’s been to all of the other ramen places and found them disappointing. Sure, there’d been some contenders on his travels with Jiraiya, some decent noodles, passable broth…. but nothing beat the hometown stuff. 

Naruto even wrote it all down, which according to Shikako-chan made it science. 

Shikako will be impressed, he’s sure, as soon as she gets a minute free to talk to him — she’s busy doing something but no one will tell Naruto exactly what which means either they really don’t know or Baa-chan has Shikako doing something important. Sasuke is also suspiciously completely absent, so that means it’s probably a Secret Thing, but on the other hand it could be that Shikako is deep in the Nara clan archives and Sasuke is being a bastard. Naruto still isn’t a very good at tracking and hasn’t learning any escape or evasion beyond what Shikako got out of their sensei before the chuunin exam.

(”Why worry about that?” Jiraiya had asked when Naruto had brought it up. “You’ll be able to just flatten the whole area. And you’ll have teammates. Teammates are great.”)

Yeah, knowing Sasuke he could be hanging around just outside of Naruto’s perception. That seems like the kind of thing that he would have been taught by Kakashi since Naruto last saw him. Naruto will have to drop by their team’s training ground when he’s done here and see if that lures anyone out. 

Also, it will just be nice to see the place. Naruto feels like he needs to slap eyes on every square inch of the village to see what’s changed. And then start tracking down everyone he knows, to see how they’ve changed. To see if he still knows them.

He knows that Sasuke and Shikako will have all kinds of new things. Lots of it sneaky, probably. Naruto learned a lot too, and he’s on good terms with Kurama, and he’s not afraid that he’s fallen behind, no…. but his teammates have had years of extra time training with Kakashi-sensei and all their friends in the village and going on missions. Naruto made a lot of friends, but none of them were good for sparring, or learning to sneak, or getting smarter.

But Naruto isn’t feeling bad for himself! 

He’s having a good time. Ayame even kept him company while he waited for his ramen, because the counter was a little slow. And Shikako and Sasuke will turn up eventually, and they’ll teach him anything he really needs to know.

“Naruto-taichou,” says someone behind him as Naruto puts his third bowl of ramen down. 

Naruto spins around on his stool. 

“Sai!” If there was ever a time for Naruto to leap to his feet, it would be now, so he does. He also tugs Sai into a hug, no time for second-guesses there. Sai had always looked like he was in desperate need of hugs on the missions Naruto had had with him, and he still looks like that.

Sai doesn’t really hug back, but the hug was definitely a good idea: Naruto is pretty sure he feels Sai relax into it and everything.

When it’s over, Naruto steps back enough to give Sai a really thorough once-over. He’s still got that crop top thing going on, and his sword, and everything else he’d need to be mission ready right away, assuming he’s got supplies in a storage seal. But he’s definitely not fresh from a mission (unless it was a really easy one) and he’s definitely not in a hurry. Also, he’s still a chuunin, which Naruto is very pleased about. He’d been kinda worried he’d come back and all of his friends would be jounin.

Of course, Sai’s got that spook stuff going on, probably, like Shikako and Sasuke had worked out, but whatever.

“I have come to ask you about the progression of your training,��� Sai says, “and any notable events from your travels.”

That’s a weird way to ask how Naruto’s trip has been, but Naruto doesn’t mind. Sai is just kind of a weird guy all around, but Naruto knows all about not quite knowing what the right, normal way to say things is.

“Oh, heck yes, I’ll tell you all about it,” Naruto says. “But only if you sit down with me and stop calling me taichou, okay?”

Sai sits down, but there’s a bit of a frown on him now. A wrinkle to his brow. 

“Sai, don’t tell me you didn’t want to sit down at Ichiraku with me,” Naruto says. “You can’t not like Ichiraku. I’ll even pay. They have buns with mushroom or pork if you don’t want noodles!”

“You do not have to pay,” Sai says.

“I insist,” Naruto counters.

“…Okay,” Sai concedes. “But it is not the venue of our conversation that caused my expression.”

He looks over at Naruto, and blinks in that I’m-thinking-about-something way that Shikako does sometimes. She and Sai kind of look alike, but maybe that’s just because neither of them have pulled out super dramatic looks?

Naruto waits, because waiting for Shikako to finish thinking is always rewarding and it probably will be with Sai, too.

“In these situations…. Shikako has suggested that I simply ask how people would prefer to be addressed,” Sai says slowly. “Would you prefer Naruto-san?”

“Aw, dude, yeah, she’s really good at explaining that stuff, huh?” Naruto reaches out and gives Sai a few sympathetic pats. Real quick ones, so Sai doesn’t think it’s pity or anything. No it’s, what’s the word, commiserating. “Don’t worry about it too bad, I used to have to get corrected by her tons, and these days I’m mostly only rude when it’s on purpose! You can just call me Naruto.”

“Alright,” Sai says.

They have to turn back to the counter for a moment to order, and Sai does actually ask for some ramen from Teuchi-ji. He gets the same thing Naruto asks for, and Naruto isn’t sure if Sai just has really good taste or if maybe he’s never been here before. 

Sai turns towards Naruto when they’re done ordering. 

“Is it that you desire to minimize our professional relationship and therefore the degree to which others might think you influence or control my actions and conduct, but don’t want to seem to outwardly disapprove of me, possibly because of my continued acquaintance with Shikako, leading to you selecting an informal term of address?”

Naruto had been watching Teuchi-ji prepare their stuff, but he whips around to look at Sai now. “What?” he demands. Then, when his brain catches up with that train-wreck of a sentence, “No!” because definitely not.

“I apologize for upsetting you,” Sai says, but he says it weird. Not exactly like resignation, but maybe like he doesn’t expect apologies to do much?

But it’s not like Naruto is actually mad. Not at Sai, anyway. Definitely at the jerks that made him think this way.

Naruto looks at him seriously. “That’s not what’s happening at all. We’re friends, okay, I’m not your captain or anything, not really. Baa-chan only put me in charge because she wanted me to get all that experience before I went to train with Jiraiya, y’know? You’re not my subordinate in every day life, jeez.”

“I see.” There’s a pause. “So it’s a sign of our emotional intimacy.”

“Uh, it sounds super weird when you say it like that, but yeah, I guess?”

“Am I really the weird one here?” Sai asks.

It’s rhetorical, because he ignores Naruto’s very emphatic answer of, “Yes, you are, you weirdo.”

Sai goes on, “We only met a few times, and then you left the village for several years. I believe the expected trajectory of relationships would frame us as acquaintances, or even strangers.”

“I mean yeah, I guess,” Naruto says. “But you came to my birthday slash going away party! That means friends. No takebacks, no taicho.”

“You do have more experience than me in this interpersonal matter, so I will concede to your knowledge of the subject.”

“Damn straight you will, I’m the best at friendship.” Naruto takes his chopsticks back up and gestures at Teuchi-ji. “Look, our ramen is coming! Just in time. Man, let me tell you, Sai, I crunched the numbers and this place is the best.”

“Is it?” Sai asks, picking his own pair of chopsticks up, snapping them neatly.

“Oh, yeah, I wrote it down and everything. Solid fact.”

“I see. So you’ve approached your analysis of ramen stands as a science, then. I would enjoy hearing all about it.”

Naruto laughs at that, long and loud and hard. People on the street look. Teuchi-ji smiles at him. 

“Oh man, Sai, you’ve definitely been spending time with Shikako-chan,” Naruto says. “It’s blasphemy to talk about other ramen places in front of Teuchi-ji, though, he might think I don’t love him anymore. How about we go find someplace to spar after we eat, and I’ll tell you on the way?”

“Yes,” Sai agrees. “I’d like that.”

#naruto #sai #dreaming of sunshine #shikako #future fic #unorganized shelf #asks #naruto is unintentionally making danzou sit through sai's recounting of all the best ramen places in land of fire #shikako all #sai all #naruto all #words words words #ask prompt

[gwisingegooli]

it’s always kinda funny trying to figure out why things ended up the way they did, in terms of all the small decisions and where the mistakes where made

yesterday i was way too fucking tired to hang out w the de anza degens and watch the league of legends world finals. i pretty much took us home from aquis and i passed the fuck out.

and later michael said he kinda wished he couldve hung with them, and later when i woke up i felt the same. but even while sleeping i told michael not to wake me during the world finals and i just peaced the fuck out.

so reflecting on it — i definitely should not have stayed up drinking til like 3 the day before yesterday, when i had to wake up for my rideshare by like 9. especially when the day before i had stayed up smoking and cleaning my room til 5, and then i woke up at like 12. and when the day before that i had stayed up til 5 drinking, and then i woke up for my 8 am, and didnt really have time to nap properly after.

so yeah, a landslide of bad sleeping decisions. but especially the night before, i shouldve turned in early so my body wasnt so done w me.

my rideshare was also fucking awful. my driver was a pushover, and so am i a little bit. and the other guy in the rideshare loved to take advantage of that! he was seedy and shady and i hated him so much for manipulating us because we were nice. he made our rideshare take us to wholefoods, to ross, etc like get his chores done bc we thought it was nbd. i would say i dont want to, or we shouldnt, but i wasnt firm enogh and i ended up getting totally steamrolled over. im never going to let myself get taken advantage of ever again.

michael was super steamed bc i ended up making him wait too, bc i came later than i thought since we were doing this guys fucking chores. i told him i tried to say something but then he texted me — “well you should say fuck no” “you fucking idiot” in separate texts and i thought he called me a fucking idiot. he texted right after “him being the fucking idiot” but i didnt see that because i had put my phone down after the text before trying not to cry.

it literally destroyed me and made me so sad and when he came to pick me up he was super angry, not at me at all, but at what happened. he was frustrated for sure but i thought he had called me that, and it had scared me because i thought it was super unfair and mean and uncharacteristic. it’s crazy that i thought he would even say that to me because he never would??? i think i was super insecure and projecting how i felt about myself, and i still felt it was within the realm of possibility he would say that to me so i couldnt even look at him.

i was quiet on the ride back, and he started talking to me and asking what happened, and i started crying trying to explain. and he said he understood but as the conversation went on he said he didnt understand why i hadnt apologized yet for making him wait. and i said i apologized over text, and im sorry for making him wait. but he said my apology didnt sound genuine. he said he wasnt trying to be difficult, especially on our first meeting. the situation must’ve been very confusing for him because i was reacting to a misunderstanding that we hadn’t know had happened yet.

i told him i didnt know what to do about that, if i am apologizing genuinely. i told him im just trying to understand what happened because it was kind of traumatizing to be taken advantage of like that and then in hindsight realize how you were manipulated, and then come see your boyfriend super angry because i wasnt able to take control of a situation and he has to be part of it all and how scary that was. and he asked me, confused, why i was scared? and i told him i was so tired and hungry and scared and sad and confused and i didnt want to have to do all of this. and he said thats ok, we can drop it.

later i said im sorry for being a pussy. and even though it makes it so that im not looking at myself, im sorry that guy was such a dick that you felt the radius of his awfulness. he laughed and said that felt apology felt more genuine. and he said he was just happy to see me.

when i got home i checked my texts and then i said “oh...” and explained how i had thought he called me a fucking idiot and he dropped everything and came to hug me and apologize and said he would never say that to me and like went hardcore on saying sorry. i was just happy everything was cleared up and i told him not to do that in texts ever again >:( and he was like ofc ;_;

so now after being physically exhuasted i had to go through an emotionally draining experience over a bad text. i bet if i wasn’t so exhuasted i wouldve been able to figure out how to sort things better, and realized why i was so upset.

then i always couldve powered through being so exhuasted but at aqui’s like. justin was so fucking annoying. like listening to justin talk, even when i am fully rested, destroys my social stamina. he makes me want to be rude and ignore him and give one word responses because otherwise i will go crazy. and then if u seem tired he’s like “are you okay?” and its like yes, but no because of you. please stop being annoying.

even looking at will is pretty triggering now because my perception of him has been realigned w how he really is bc of a few recent mishaps. i could go into them in detail but basically he’s just a little kid who has a lot of growing up to do, isnt good at listening, being open minded, planning things.... i had to dd because he fucked up planning on the way there. he told his friends to come and then we ended up heading out when they were supposed to come!! like yes, george shouldve checked his phone for the change in plans but also. stop sending conflicting plans last minute. >:( i am the most tired one here. and then no one else offered to drive because it was all last minute. like i am back for the first time and y’all aint even gonna warmly greet me and take care of me???????? just kidding but also not kidding LOL

so the table seating at aqui’s was fucking awful. daniel was way on the edge when he should be sitting near me and michael cause he’s the only other cool person. alvin was fine but i was like zzz because justin was in the center. justin does like one on one conversations “well” (by this i mean he can keep a conversation going for forever and not in a good way) so he should be on the side. will was playing a fucking phone game so he shouldve been on the side. alvin ended up being on his phone too.

daniel tried to engage but the tables are too far and he could only make like funny eye contact w us every once in a while and i was like TT

so i slowly phased in and out of consciousness and then by the end of the trip i was like. michael. i need to go and die in peace rn.

and thats why i missed worlds. its a lot of situational things but thats why you gotta make sure you aren’t HALT (hungry angry lonely tired) so you can evaluate your situations and fix shit up and be actually alive to take on the world.

[ponyregrets]

No One Told You Life Was Gonna Be This Way

Kabby social media AU, 3200 words, T

did u know that 1. it is @kane-and-griffin‘s birthday 2. she accidentally went viral for ranting about Friends and 3. once I start thinking about how A Thing (random example: Marcus Kane writing viral Friends tweets) would go down I cannot stop until I just write the thing

anyway happy birthday claire!!

Marcus Kane is, unfortunately, very familiar with the Nice Guy phenomenon.

It's an occupational hazard of writing science fiction, especially in the internet age; all he has to do is look for his most obnoxious fans, and he finds an unfortunately loud contingent of entitled mostly white men who believe that the world owes them women and happiness without any effort on their parts. It's something he tries to combat as much as possible, wherever he can, and he knows it works in some cases. For every reader who's turned against him for being an SJW cuck (whatever that means), he has another who's expressed appreciation for his opening them up to perspectives they hadn't considered and broadened their empathy and understanding.

That's what sci-fi should do, as far as Marcus is concerned. The heart of science fiction is acceptance and unity.

Which is why he tells Bellamy, "I need you to do one of those Twitter threads for me."

"For what?" Bellamy asks, wary. As Marcus's assistant, he seems to think his most important duty is talking Marcus out of interacting with social media. And he may be right.

"Ross Gellar."

It takes him a second. "The guy from Friends?" he finally asks.

"Yes. I want to explain to my followers why he's bad romantic lead and role model."

To his shock, the response is instant. "Okay."

"No arguments? No lecture on how that isn't what Twitter is for?"

"No, fuck Ross," he says. "What do you want to say? I'll make it happen."

Marcus clucks his tongue. "I'll write up a statement."

* Marcus Kane @kanemarcus Last week, while ill, I watched Friends on Netflix for the first time. So, a thread on friendship, romance, Joey Tribiani, and Ross Gellar.

O @o-so-cool reblogged Sometimes my brother's boss is pretty okay.

raven @queenreyesthefirst reblogged brb adding @kanemarcus to non-sucky white dude sci-fi authors and shipping him with @scalzi

Finn Collins @finnishfirst reblogged this is kind of interesting but way too hard on ross. he does a lot of good things! see thread

Bellamy @bradburybell reblogged this is not nearly hard enough on ross

Clarke Griffin @clarkegriffin reblogged Relevant to your interests @ark-abby

*

"So here's what I think happened," says Bellamy. He's brought Marcus a coffee without being prompted, so whatever it is must be bad.

Marcus takes a sip of the drink. "When?"

"With your Twitter rant."

"Ah. I assume there are a lot of protests from the louder, stupider portion of my fanbase about how I've allowed the liberal fake media destroy my mind and masculinity?"

"Yeah, there are some of those. But, uh--it went way past your fanbase."

"Excuse me?"

"This is your most retweeted post ever. Not even close. It's viral. You've got people fighting you, people telling you it's a revelation, and about a thousand new followers already. In the last day."

He frowns. "Is Friends really still that popular?"

"Apparently." He shrugs. "Clarke says you made Buzzfeed and a couple of the other aggregator sites too. She and Raven have been texting me updates. They think it's hilarious."

"What does that mean?"

"Honestly? I don't fucking know. I told you when you hired me I'm not actually good at this stuff. I tried to warn you."

"You did." He takes another sip of coffee. "So, what do you think happened?"

"My sister retweeted it, and she spends about ninety percent of her time thinking about her social media brand, so she's got a ton of followers. Then Raven picked it up from her, her tech friends got a hold of it, and after that--" He shrugs. "You got out of your niche and into broader Twitter, and I'm not going to be able to find anything useful in your notifications for weeks. It's all Ross/Joey shipping discourse. Clarke's words, not mine," he adds.

"Should I be concerned?"

"I don't know. I guess we'll find out if it actually sells more books. And Clarke thinks we should try to leverage it into more publicity, she's got an idea for that."

Marcus hasn't actually met most of Bellamy's friends, but he references them enough that he knows who they are. Octavia, sister, Raven, ex-girlfriend, Clarke, current girlfriend. He also knows that all of them are more familiar with social media than Bellamy is, so he's not surprised that he consulted them.

Mostly, though, he still can't believe anyone really cares about this.

"An idea to leverage the Friends discourse?"

Bellamy shrugs. "Apparently this fit into an ongoing conversation she's been having with her mother. Abby Griffin? She writes for Ark AV. She did that think-piece about what mainstream science fiction gets wrong about female characters."

"Ah," says Marcus. He remembers the article, which had been harsh but ultimately fair, and an interesting take, once he'd gotten over the initial hurt of being used in a not entirely positive light. "I didn't know that was Clarke's mother."

"Yeah, I figured I'd tell you later. Once I didn't think you were going to call her up and argue with her about how much better you've gotten."

"And now you don't think I will?"

"Honestly, I don't care. I just want to see you guys fight about Friends," he says. "That sounds awesome."

"So, you have no ulterior motives here. Just looking out for my best interests."

"Obviously."

"If she's Clarke's mother, I assume she's local? Or will I be fighting her on a podcast?"

"We were thinking Starbucks on Saturday. Caffeine and lots of witnesses."

Marcus finally lets himself open up Twitter, now that he's had enough coffee. He almost always has some notifications when he looks; he's a public figure with a passionate fanbase, he's used to people trying to talk to him on Twitter. That's why he has a Twitter in the first place. But the number of notifications has never been so high, not in his memory. And, as Bellamy said, it really is a lot of passionate Friends discourse, both for and against his opinions. It's an overwhelming amount of love, hate, and passion. Like discovering an entirely new world.

He thought he understood fandom, but apparently he has a long way to go.

"Starbucks would be fine," he tells Bellamy, a little faintly. "I'd enjoy that."

*

Marcus Kane @kanemarcus A lot of new followers today. Here are a few notes for you:

Marcus Kane @kanemarcus Replying to @kanemarcus I am a published science fiction author. Those of you telling me to just write a book instead of many tweets, I have written many books.

Marcus Kane @kanemarcus Replying to @kanemarcus You can find the link to purchase them in my header.

Marcus Kane @kanemarcus Replying to @kanemarcus I have never claimed to be an expert on Friends. This was my first time watching, and these are my impressions based on one viewing.

Marcus Kane @kanemarcus Replying to @kanemarcus My opinion on the Friends canon does not invalidate yours. Yours is as valid as it ever was. But if you feel threatened, examine that.

Marcus Kane @kanemarcus Replying to @kanemarcus My ideas may have merit you're reluctant to fully accept because of your own perceptions of how things should be in relationships.

Marcus Kane @kanemarcus Replying to @kanemarcus If you followed me for more Friends content, please be aware this is an outlier. I usually talk about science fiction.

Marcus Kane @kanemarcus Replying to @kanemarcus On that note, would anyone like to discuss the Hugo Awards?

Masper @gogglesdonothing Replying to @kanemarcus ross/rachel is forever tho

Marcus Kane @kanemarcus Replying to @kanemarcus and @gogglesdonothing I'll take that as a no.

Jonty @themediumgreen Replying to @kanemarcus and @gogglesdonothing I'm so sorry Mr. Kane just ignore him I want to talk about the Hugos tell me all your favorite winners do you like Chuck Tingle

Jonty @themediumgreen Replying to @gogglesdonothing I CAN'T TAKE YOU ANYWHERE

*

Marcus will admit he does not feel broadly prepared to seriously enter the Friends discourse. He is, after all, a neophyte. If there are scholarly works on Friends, he has not read them. If there's any academic discussion of these issues, he is not familiar with it. His knowledge is vague and still forming, but for some people, this show was a huge part of their development. It matters to them on a deep, personal level.

For him, it was a decent use of his time while he was sick and confined to his couch. He had a fever for most of the first season. He's not sure he's prepared to fight anyone about it. Based on his mentions, he has many, many fewer horses in this race than other people. But maybe that's a good thing. Maybe his perspective as an outsider is valuable.

Or maybe he just wants the chance to sit down with Abby Griffin. Because instead of spending the past week either working on his next book or even familiarizing himself with Friends and the criticism surrounding it, he's mostly been researching Abby Griffin herself. He'd done it some after the first article Bellamy sent, curious to see her other work, but he'd been busy with a deadline and hadn't really had much time for that, had barely scratched the surface of this woman.

He doesn't have time for it now either, of course, but it's at least relevant to something in his life. And, as Bellamy and his friends have pointed out, this is at least good publicity. It's not a complete waste of time.

The Abby Griffin stalking might be a waste, but he can't help it. She's interesting. The pop-culture writing is, apparently, a side job, something she never intended to get seriously involved in. The website had been her husband's, and when he passed away, Abby and Clarke had taken over its upkeep, and Abby had started producing content when she had time. Given her full-time job is as the director of internal medicine at the hospital, he's frankly amazed she has as much time for content as she does.

And it's good content. She and Clarke have a weekly column where they discuss a movie they went to see together, and the female characters in science fiction piece was apparently part of a series. Her taste is good and her opinions are interesting, and by the time he's meeting her, he has one big question, and one only.

They get through introductions and are settled in at the table before he finally lets it out. "Honestly, I don't understand how you can like Ross."

She lets out a surprised laugh. "Excuse me?"

"Bellamy said he was looking forward to us fighting over Friends, but I have trouble believing you disagree with my opinion of Ross. I don't know what we'd be fighting about."

She smiles into her mug. He'd known she was beautiful from the picture he found on the hospital website, but it's different to see in person, and more awkward. Bellamy and Clarke are hanging out at their own table, pretending not to eavesdrop; it's not an ideal time to be caught staring. "I don't know what he told you, but I didn't disagree. It was an impressive rant. Well reasoned and accurate. I was more interested in discussing why you posted it and the reactions you got. I saw it wasn't popular among some of your readers."

"To say the least."

"One of the things I've been curious about since getting involved in online fandom is what counts as acceptable ways to interact, especially for those of us over thirty or so. I saw a lot of people asking why a heterosexual man in his late forties would care this much about Friends at all. As if that was the problem."

"Judging from the angry responses, plenty of heterosexual men are very invested in Friends. Although I'm not sure how old they are," he grants.

"Age is the biggest issue, in my experience. You'd been participating in an acceptable way, as a creator, but once you show yourself to be invested in Friends shipping--"

"I stepped into the wrong part of fandom."

"That's my thesis, yes."

He considers. "Am I on the record?"

"I'm not a reporter, Marcus," she says, sounding amused. "I'm not trying to trick you into saying something I can use against you. But if you'd like to officially be off the record, we can say that you are."

"My hope with that post was that it would make some of my readers rethink their attitudes towards women and romance. The number of responses I got to Valena's story in Bright Sky Morning that boiled down to her being wrong for not returning Pavel's feelings even though he'd been so devoted to her was--staggering. And depressing."

"Did your female readers appreciate it?"

"They did. Apparently Jin was a much more appealing partner."

Abby smiles. "I certainly thought so."

It's not his first time meeting a fan, of course, and she might not even be a fan, in the sense they're talking about. But she's read his work and has opinions on it, and that's always a little bit flattering. Especially when they align with his. "I'm glad. I was hoping he would be." He clears his throat. "So, you'd like to talk to me as a forty-eight-year-old man who publicly had opinions on shipping."

"And to get your thoughts on Monica and Chandler," she says, all innocence. "If you don't mind."

He can't help smiling himself. "Not at all. I'm all yours."

*

Marcus Kane @kanemarcus Expanded my horizons this weekend with the High School Musical trilogy. A curious cultural phenomenon.

Marcus Kane @kanemarcus Replying to @kanemarcus I appreciated that Troy and Gabriela didn't go to the same college, but still stayed in the same general area.

Marcus Kane @kanemarcus Replying to @kanemarcus I still don't think the couple has much of a future, but in an unrealistic movie, I appreciated that nod to practicality.

Marcus Kane @kanemarcus Replying to @kanemarcus Very disappointed about the last-minute attempt to cement Ryan's heterosexuality. Let children have LGBT role models.

Murphy @firstnameredacted Replying to @kanemarcus If you're seriously going to be talking about Disney movies from now on I'm unfollowing you, I don't give a shit about this

Marcus Kane @kanemarcus Replying to @kanemarcus and @firstnameredacted Please do.

*

"Look," says Bellamy, two months after the first Friends rant, "I'm not going to pretend I'm good with crushes, but it would be a lot easier to just ask Abby if she wants to get dinner off the record instead of coming up with new weird shit to have opinions about on Twitter every week."

"I assume the timing of this isn't a coincidence," Marcus says. He was just getting his coat on to go meet her.

"You've already got a standing coffee date. Turn it into a real date. I'm begging you."

"You don't enjoy my opinions on the High School Musical series?"

"I actually do, I'm just getting tired of blocking people. Also, I don't know if you're aware, but dating is awesome. You should try it."

"I appreciate your concern. You don't think it would be weird for you if your boss was dating your girlfriend's mother?"

"No weirder than whatever's actually happening right now. And don't even try to tell me you're not asking her out because you're worried about how it would affect me."

It does sound absurd, when he puts it like that. "No. That wasn't a major factor."

Bellamy rolls his eyes. "Just ask if she wants to come check out the Descendants franchise with you next weekend. Definitely a solid pickup line. Chicks dig it."

"The what?"

"It's like the spiritual successor to High School Musical. I'll send you a link. You should know this stuff if you're really going in on this."

"I should give you a raise."

"That too. Say hi to Abby for me."

It's not entirely accurate to say that he thinks about what Bellamy said as he walks over to his weekly meeting with Abby. Every time he walks to her favorite coffee shop near the hospital, he's thinking these same kinds of thoughts, so it's not really Bellamy's fault. He enjoys Abby's company company and would be happy to see more of her. He already knew that. But it's been a long time since he navigated anything like this.

If only Friends had prepared him for this kind of romance.

"Marcus," says Abby, giving him a smile when he sits down across from her. As usual, she's surrounded by papers, and he sometimes doubts that she'd even have time for a relationship. She does keep herself busy. "I enjoyed your meditations on High School Musical."

"I'm glad to hear it. Bellamy says it gave me a net loss of followers, but not as much of one as he thinks I deserved."

"I'm not surprised." She considers him. "I didn't mean for our friendship to hurt your career."

"I don't think it is. Plenty of people just read my books and never even find out I'm on Twitter. It's not a large percentage of sales. You're blaming yourself for the High School Musical tweets?" he adds, curious. They are her fault, broadly speaking, but he wasn't sure she knew.

"If you don't keep coming up with hot takes, we don't have much to talk about."

He laughs. "I hope we'd come up with something."

"I hope so too."

The conversation lags, but it's not a bad lag. It feels like she's given him an opening, and it's his job to figure out how to take advantage of it.

The easiest way would be to simply propose a dinner date, as Bellamy suggested. But he's never been good at simple.

"You know, you never told me your favorite relationship on Friends."

"I didn't?"

"No, we usually talk about my opinions."

She levels her gaze at him, considering. "Do you know what I think when I watch Friends now?"

"No."

"They're all so young. And don't get me wrong, I met my husband when we were young, and the two of us were happy, but--sometimes it worries me how much emphasis we put on meeting people early in life. The younger you are, the more romantic it is. And that's one kind of romance, but it's not everything. It makes me want to shake all these kids and tell them that life doesn't end at thirty, or forty, or fifty. You'll keep on meeting new people, and you can still be happy."

He lets himself reach for her hand, and relief floods him when she lets him take it, even turns it over so she can squeeze his fingers. "So your favorite relationship on Friends is the one Rachel has when she's forty-five and Ross is dead?" he teases.

"I hope you're not comparing my husband to Ross."

He has to laugh. "No. I would never."

Abby's smile is warm, and it's suddenly so easy to not be nervous at all. "Good. Because the rest of that was right."

"Good," he agrees. "I was hoping you'd say that."

*

Sky Crew Reviews @kaneandgriffin New list from @kanemarcus: top 10 YA sci-fi books for adults! Up next, top 10 adult sci-fi books for teens. Age is nothing but a number.

Murphy @firstnameredacted Replying to @kaneandgriffin I will pay you to stop

Bellamy @bradburybell Replying to @kaneandgriffin and @firstnameredacted when are you actually going to unfollow like you keep saying you will? asking for a friend

Murphy @firstnameredacted Replying to @kaneandgriffin, @firstnameredacted, and @bradburybell I keep hoping I'm going to come back and he'll be normal again

SJW Cuck @kanemarcus Replying to @kaneandgriffin, @firstnameredacted, and @bradburybell Don't hold your breath.

[parabellum-rpg-archive]

Congratulations, Meghan! You’ve been accepted to play Camila Perez. Please make your page and send it in within 24 hours.

Admin note: THIS WAS SO WELL WRITTEN. The fact that you added so much depth to Camila, beyond being seen as just ditzy. I feel like Camila is the lightness that we’ll all need to see on the dash. I’m here for it. 100%. - Admin V

CHARACTER DESIRED

Camila Perez.

DESCRIBE THE CHARACTER IN YOUR OWN WORDS

No need to rewrite the biography - but who are they to you? What are their goals, ambitions, or flaws? Here’s your opportunity to show us who this character is to you.

I love Camila. She’s deliciously bright, and worldly, and pleasure-seeking and wild and warm all at once. A lot of her interests read as shallow. I think it’s easy to dismiss her in that way— people mistake sociability and a bubbly nature for other things, and Camila doesn’t really help that perception with her love of material items. But she has a deep care and respect for her family, and a charm about her that draws people in. She’s fun! She has a gift of making others feel wanted, and when someone is with Camila, they get the full force of that magnetism. She’s the person that compliments other drunk girls in the bathroom, pulls even the most reluctant stranger along on one of her wild, debaucherous adventures.

As often as she is called a ditz, or stupid, there’s a vividness to her that can’t be ignored. Bright-eyed and curious, Camila is undeniably alive.

Maybe that curiosity drives her to a fault.

After all— curiosity is what entangled her in the city’s underbelly in the first place. Camila likes to weave her way in and out of these circles with a careless excitement. She indulges in the expensive booze, lounges with corrupt politicians and criminals without pausing to consider how they came into this position in the first place, and what exactly funded their wealth of resources. It’s not something she thinks about. Not the blood money, not what these men do when they’re not spending their cash on beautiful women. To some extent, its her naivete— the other part is willful ignorance. It’s easier for Camila that way. Calling her parents is easier, collecting her check and spending it on exorbitant handbags is easier too.

For now, the lifestyle has been without consequences. I think it would be interesting to see her interact with some of the grittier realities of crime, and maybe some of the darker characters who aren’t quite as charmed with Camila’s personality. (Not that she wouldn’t try her best to win them over). It’s a comfortable, if not chaotic bubble she’s been living in. And as willing as she was to dive into this world, to fully entrench herself with crime lords, she’s been dealt a pretty easy hand. I think it would be interesting to see if Camila balks at some of the more serious aspects, or goes into it willingly, determined to preserve her lifestyle.

Not that she’s probably considered that much: I think Camila is largely short-sighted. She likes gratification. it’s difficult for her to see personal value in things she deems unnecessary, or unpleasant. It’s not that she’s incapable of hard work— it’s just that Camila’s effort correlates directly with her interest. She has no trouble putting in extra hours to afford a new Birkin, but studying for a test seems like a near-impossible task. (It practically was).

Given the right reward, I think Camila is willing to do a lot.

Despite this, though, I think she has a hard time describing her ambitions as concrete and quantifiable goals. Since high-school, all she’s ever wanted was freedom— and now she has it. There’s no CEO position Camila’s vying for, no  grab for power. No long-term plans. But what she wants, she wants so badly— even if she’s just chasing something as vague as a feeling or sensation. Camila lives voraciously. She enjoys herself—and life— fully, no-half measures. She craves stimulation, and that’s what makes her so well-suited to her job. Smoke, sweat, tumbling ice, a new client every night, stories that end in broken heels and laughter. It’s overwhelming to some, but Camila simply wants more.

More dresses. More friends to giggle with. More stupid stories, more men tripping over their feet to give her their attention.

For now, Camila is very intent on living life the way she wants, even if others might dismiss it as shallow, or silly. It’s still hers. For all her faults, she is uniquely herself—no matter what trouble that could bring her.

Camila is chasing after things so fast, so carelessly, she’s almost euphorically dizzy.

WRITING SAMPLE

Provide as many IN CHARACTER samples as you like. At the very least, we expect three paragraphs written in third person. Aside from that, there are no rules. Please include anything you deem necessary.

The club is loud. Camila’s nails— obnoxiously fuchsia— click idly against the side of her shot glass. It needs filling.

“Hereee, babydoll.” The client to her left extends the almost-empty bottle, filling her own glass chivalrously.

The dimples in Camila’s cheek deepen; she titters and grins appreciatively.

“Ooh, thank you. My hero.”

He’s forty-six. Married, probably, salt-and-pepper hair with three mansions and a wallet that’s seeing a lot of action tonight. He shoves a wad of tips towards one of the servers bearing more champagne: the man stammers his thanks. She likes the generous ones.

“Didn’t think I was gonna let you go thirsty tonight, huh?”

The two of them have been anything but.

“So. Did you know—” She pauses, rakes her fingers through her hair enticingly. “—I once drank two forties before my SATs. Top to bottom, n’ everything.”

Tom—a perfectly boring name for a money launderer — likes wild stories. She can tell, in the way he keeps boasting about his own, trying to coax something out of her. Maybe it’s the mid-life crisis thing. Trying to re-live the good old days, the wild times, before this man’s life became board meetings and portfolio evaluations.

He smiles, skeptical but indulging.

“No way. Bullshit.”

“Yes way!”

“You did not drink before your SATs.”

Camila sighs. Fixes him with a drunk, demure pout.

“I can’t believe you don’t believe me.”

“—There’s no way you drank that much before the most important test of your life.”

The gloss to her hair shimmers gently as she fans it about her shoulders, raises an eyebrow to be purposefully coy.

“Who said it was that important?”

Tom’s laughter is more of a bark.

“Yeah, fine. I do actually believe you now.”

A gentle tongue click, and Camila ropes an arm around his, practically seated in his lap as she cranes her face towards his.

“Silly you for believing. It was rum, actually. And my high school exit exam— not the SATs, or whatever.”

“It’s okay though—” Her cheeks are warm, but she reaches for the champagne again anyway. It’s too early to stop. “—I still like you.”

He rolls his eyes with a good-natured snort, pleased to be the object of her gentle teasing.

It’s what he paid for.

“That was— very convincing. You’re like the Michael Jordan of lying.”

Camila slurps at her champagne delicately, eyes wide and sincere.

“I dunno who that is.”

Tom laughs hard, and flags down another server for more glasses.

(Okay. So she knew that one.)

It’s late. The night rolls on. Millionaires and billionaires slink in and out of their booths, in various states of inebriation, and Camila’s just passed drunk, moving well into inebriated. All of her limbs feel tingly. If she doesn’t focus hard enough, the room spins.

Her new friend seems to be in a similar state. Hiccups punctuate almost half of his words.

“That was pretty good— you’re good at lying! You ought to be a politician, hon.”

He’s teasing her. Even Camila knows that’s the stupidest thing she’s ever heard.

“Blegh.”

“No, I mean it. Like a senator, or something.” His tone’s taken on that indulgent tone again— halfway to patronizing.“It’d be fun.”

“Yeah? Why?” Camila’s eyes glimmer mischievously. “Would you be my mistress, if I was?”

The man gives her smug, sloppy grin.

“Sweetheart, I’d be your anything.”

Now Camila laughs, silly and delighted, when the buzz of her phone scatters her thoughts.

Her eyes catch a glimpse of the screen. Camila’s stomach begins to sink.

Oh, no. Oh, shit! Mild panic pools in her stomach, and she flashes Tom an apologetic smile before excusing herself to the bathroom, dropping the phone on the marble counter and staring at it with the uncontrolled intensity of a drunk.

Shit.

Shit. Shit. Shit.

Her parents were calling at the worst possible time.

There’s no way she can talk to them like this. Camila is far too drunk to hide her condition— she can feel the way her brain is sloshing around in her head, sloppy and useless. Her tongue is loose. She probably sounds a wreck, too.

The call goes to voicemail, and Camila tries to bury the deep knot of guilt in her stomach, fingers moving hesitantly along the keyboard.

“Working! Call u later. XO.”

She scans it twice for mistakes before sending.

There. Camila had told them, in another one of her lies, that she’d began working at a different restaurant, something more upscale— she’d explained the hours were longer, but the pay was better. That covered the late nights. It also explained the delicate drop-necklace she’d been able to afford recently, the pricey gifts she had brought them. Camila supposes she should feel guilty for yet another lie she’s spun. Instead, it’s much closer to relief. Like she’s given herself enough breathing room.

As senselessly gone as she was, Camila doesn’t want to shatter the illusion— the one of the little girl in her best and neatest dress, dutifully sent to and from Mass each Sunday. It was a long time ago. Even if that girl doesn’t exist any more— maybe never really existed— she’s not going to hurt her parents in that way.

It’s too glum a thought.

She can feel the frown formulating between her brows, a tiny stitch of worry which just won’t do. She’s here to have fun. She’s getting paid to have fun! A breath, a tiny wriggle in which she adjusts the tight hug of her dress, and she’s ready to head back out.

Camila stalks out across the floor, pleased at the way Tom’s eyes track her from his booth.

“Guess who got more fuckin’ boooooze!”

He waves a bottle of Macallan at her like a victory flag, glorious and expensive, and Camila is more than happy to slink back over into his lap.

—

The girls are jumbled mess on the floor, spread out and lounging like felines, preoccupied with the task of christening Camila’s new apartment. New apartment meant a night out to celebrate. A night out to celebrate meant the elaborate, often ritualistic task of getting ready.

Camila sits right at the center, taking stock of the chaos.

She can’t count the glistening bottles of nail polish scattered about, clacking merrily together as Maria selects the color. Palettes litter floor. Eyelash curlers. Phones, with their busy music apps and text messages, which Emma continues to glance at periodically.

But only between bitching about her latest client.

“He kept fucking going on about Nascar! Like, shares this, shares that, all that bullshit.”

Maria glances up from her nails, squinting warily in Emma’s direction.

“NASDAQ, is like, the stock market. Nascar is car racing.” A concerned beat. “You know that, right?”

Emma brushes it aside airily.

“Yeah. I just hate when they don’t shut up about business.”

There’s a pause while Camila corrects a smudge on Maria’s cuticle.

“I dunno, I think it’s kinda funny. They say a bunch of boring stuff to me and I just repeat back to the next client, and then they think it’s impressive.”

She straightens up self-importantly, deepens her voice.

“We need to talk about portfolio diversity for our clients— you and I both know we got killed last quarter. I’m not losing to those mothafuckers again.”

She giggles.

“See?”

There’s a loud sigh directly across from her.

“None of that made any sense.”

Camila chooses to ignore that! She gives the teal bottle of polish a vigorous shake, tongue poking out from the corner of her mouth with the effort.

“So do you want a daisy on the pinkie, or a heart?”

Before she can answer, Camila starts flicking the brush carefully about the nail, turning her finger this way and that to achieve the perfect stroke.

“I’ve been practicing my petal shapes.”

“If it looks like shit I’m taking it to a salon.”

“Bitch, I am the salon.”  

Maria still looks mutinous, but curiosity seems to have won her over. She finishes the other nail with an excited hum and a tiny clap, smiling over at her friend expectantly.  

An eyebrow raise.

“…It does look good.”

Victory. Camila smacks a loud kiss to her cheek.

“See! You doubted my skills.”

“I doubted your sobriety.”

She shrieks with laughter and snatches the other girls phone, promising retribution in the form of tinder.

“Just for that, I’m gonna match with you every guy named Chad.”

#accepted

[hashtagartistlife]

2016 Fic Recap

Thanks to the beautiful and talented @sequencefairy for the tag! 

total number of completed stories:

In total: 38

Bleach: 30 (28 english stories + 2 korean ones) 

Miraculous Ladybug: 4 (2 english + 2 korean) 

Naruto: 1

Fairy Tail: 1

Noragami: 1

GSNK: 1

total word count:

45841 words in finished fics, but if we include my published in-progress fics, the number jumps to 68286. If we want to add up the words I have scattered around in as-yet unpublished fics..... ngl, probably about double that number :’/ :’/ :’/ 

fandoms written in:

Answered that one above. 

looking back, did you expect to write more fic than you thought you would this year, less, or about what you’d expected?

Jesus god I haven’t written this much fic..... well. ever. I’ve always dabbled in ficwriting, but I thought of myself as primarily an artist-- this year is the year that cemented the fact that, hey! Maybe I want to be a good writer as well. Basically I wrote about 10 times as much fic as I ever expected to write, but it’s all good  :’D  

what’s your own favorite story of the year?

fdnfjfhujkdfjrs UM probably The Search for Delos; it came to me really vividly and I wrote it all in pretty much one sitting. When I was done, I was genuinely very surprised that I had a piece like this in me. It’s somewhat different from my usual writing style, and it deals with some heavy themes, but this is the closest I’ve ever gotten to achieving my writing style goal of being simple but vivid and achingly profound. 

did you take any writing risks this year?

I joined IRBB, which was risky considering my track record of MONTH-LONG WAITS between chapters and my muse being flighty like icarus :’/ case in point: im only 4000 words in and im stuck as hell. Aside from this, I. uh. Wrote nsfw for the first time and discovered joint writing, which is a wonderful, wonderful thing. 

do you have any fanfic or profit goals for the new year?

I want to try and finish cyclical this year, but as long as I keep a semi-regular update schedule on that one (once a month, or thereabouts) I’ll consider it a success :’/ I definitely have to finish irbb, and apart from that if i’m being ambitious... I’d like to finish f r a y and where the heart rests. 

The other goal is if I manage to finish cyclical (whether this year or in the future), I want to print it with a nice cover and illustrations and have it on my shelf for my own edification :’D 

best story of the year?

I’m gonna be honest i don’t understand this question... I’ve already said my favourite story for the year was The Search for Delos, but is this asking, like, objectively my best piece of writing? I’d still say The Search for Delos :’/ Although, I do think Ritardando was some good writing on my part. 

most popular story of the year?

In terms of Bleach, The Author is Dead was by far and away the most popular (isn’t the title very telling :’/). But overall, That’s Not How You Use a Miraculous got.... ridiculous amounts of reception. God I should continue that fic..... hahaha who am i kidding rip all my ml fics :’/ :’/ :’/ 

story of mine most under-appreciated by the universe, in my opinion:

I’m actually very pleased to say that most of my fics are received super well by everybody and I’m very thankful 8ㅁ8 Maaaaybe if I had to pick I might point people in the direction of One Of These Days? I think people forget that I write not-angst sometimes. One Of These Days is just super fuzzy and warm and it makes me feel happy every time I remember I wrote it, so if ur in the mood for some ir warm fuzzies go take a look! 

most fun story to write:

Definitely Cyclical. I’m having SO MUCH FUN reliving their early-days snark at each other. 

F r a y is also another fic I am enjoying writing, but for entirely different reasons lmao :’D :’D :’D 

story with the single sexiest moment:

UUUUHHHH

i dont have a huge selection to choose from but i am very fond of:

“And then afterwards…” He trails off, and he makes the pause sound obscene; the promise of afterwards is more effective than any dirty innuendo he could have made. 

from and every breath we drew was--  

most sweet story:

HAHAHAHAHAhahahahave you met me

Ok but in all honesty One of These Days and Phones Connect Me To You was so sweet that writing it gave me cavities 

”holy crap, thats wrong, even for you!” story:

OK, so when Naruto finished back in 2014 and my ships were canon and the other side of the shipwar started writing adultery i was like ????????????? I mean, I didn’t seek em out and harass them for it, they can do what they want, but I was like ‘why adultery in particular. Why don’t you just ignore the ending altogether’ 

cue 2016 and tite kubo runs bleach into the fucking ground, and i fucking UNDERSTAND. Dude, I thought you wouldn’t be able to PAY me to write adultery before 2016 and now you wouldn’t be able to pay me to STOP. Anyway, all my adultery fics fall under this category i suppose. doesn’t stop me from writing them :’/ 

story that shifted my own perceptions of the characters & most unintentionally telling story:

all the post-686 adultery that hellchat plotted tbh. 686 opened up WHOLE NEW AVENUES of character exploration that we hadn’t even THOUGHT to touch and honestly, I don’t even want an alternate ending chapter for bleach any more (except the rr novel, that novel can choke), because any single chapter fix is NOT going to cover the vast amounts of plotholes bleach left hanging open. (a bleach reboot that fixes everything wrong with it is a different story though.... god what i wouldn’t give for that.) But yeah, post-686 plotting has opened up some really interesting can of worms in terms of characterisations for our protagonists, and u can see some of it in fics like Listen and Stay. 

hardest story to write:

This Blood On Our Hands. I’m pretty happy with how it turned out overall, but I started writing that fic with only the last line in mind and contriving things so that we could get it to that stage was SO HARD. 

biggest disappointment:

Not managing to get out a single proper long post-686 fic that isn’t a drabble. I mean, I started posting where the heart rests, but I have about 5 on the backburner and I know exactly what’s happening in all of them and I just wanna plough through it while the salt is fresh, u feel? 

biggest surprise:

In terms of what I am capable of re: style and structure and substance, The Search For Delos. The fact that I started writing nsfw, especially fucking Unveiled..... what was I on?! And the fact that I finally understand why some people write adultery fics :’/ 

Gonna tag @swingsdown, @kingkuchiki, @papalogia, @duckiesteasmiles, @woodrokiro @missthornbirds!!

#Bleach #ichiruki #writer life #i love doing/reading these i LOVE discussing the writing process with people <3 #fangirl life #bleach fic