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ponderingmoonlight · 27 days

Note

Gojo falls ill and reader does finishes his missions and her own missions as well do Gojo doesn't have a pile of work waiting for him once he gets better. Gojo gets better. And finds out. Hehehehe Lobe u babes

omg I love this, let's do it hehe

Reader finishing Gojo's missions when he falls sick and he finds out

Pairing: Gojo x wife!reader

Word Count: 2,3k

Synopsis: When your husband falls sick, you don't think twice about completing all of his tasks in order for him to not be stressed - even if it means multiple sleepless nights for youself. Little did you know that your husband will find out about it and thank you in his own way...

Warnings: pure fluff over fluff so enjoy, Gojo basically being THE husband for y'all, not proofread because it's already darn late here and I'm way too tired

„Oh come on, don’t tell me the honoured one caught a cold”, you playfully tease your beloved husband.

He’s definitely ill, there’s no doubt in that. The way his forehead is covered in sweat, his unusual pale face paired with his heavy breathing. Let alone the sight of his red and runny nose.

You never thought this is possible. After all, Satoru is one of the few people who are able to use revered technique. Isn’t he able to heal himself, to prevent his body from falling sick?

“Looks like I overdid it those last weeks. My body is catching up on my apparently”, he replies weakly along with a nasty sounding cough.

You know all too well these last weeks were like a trip to hell and back for him. This is actually the first time you saw your husband after one whole week of him running from mission to mission and coming home into bad past after midnight. Being two special grade sorcerers, it is your responsibility to prevent the worst things from happening. Especially during summer, the number of curses triples. And that paired with the stinging fact that jujutsu sorcerers die like flies each and every day…

It’s no wonder his body took a toll on him.

“You’ll stay here for the rest of the week, babe”, you instruct him gently while pulling a blanket up his chest.

“Nah, no chance. I’ll have a pile of work when I get back and-AH.”

It’s frightening, the way he almost chokes while coughing so roughly that it vibrates through your whole body. This doesn’t sound good at all. To be exact, you’ve never seen your husband like this despite the fact that you’ve been together for multiple years by now. If he’s feeling this miserable, it’s definitely time for a break.

“Don’t worry about that. I hold the position while you’re gone.”

Little did he know you meant that.

-a week later-

“It’s far past midnight. Why are you still up, (y/n)?”

His hoarse voice rips you out of your microsleep immediately, lids so heavy they feel like closing by themselves if you don’t pay close attention.

“Oh, just work.”

No, it’s not just work. Apart from the daily drama you have to endure, you made it your mission to complete each and every task your husband would face as soon as he comes back. You know all too well he’ll throw himself fully into work again, not thinking about his own health a single second. And to prevent that, you decided to finish his missions as well, to teach his students, to do anything in your power to prevent Satoru from a pile of work.

Including swollen eyelids, constant grumpy mood, no effort to eat and your shoulders hanging down onto the ground.

You hate to admit it, but you are exhausted. You never realized how much work your husband does during the day. Must be easier for him, though. Teleportation sure sounds nice at the moment…

“I’m worried about you, babe. Are the elders bombarding you with work again? Maybe I need to have a serious talk again-“

“No, don’t think too much about it. I’m just hanging on a bit, that’s it”, you lie.

Oh, Satoru knows it is. After all, you’re talking about yourself. You, so disciplined that you’d never leave work unattended. No, it’s absolutely impossible that you’re “hanging on a bit”. But what else is it? The dark circles underneath your eyes look like valleys in the soft light of a lamp, tired eyes failing to focus on the paperwork in front of you. Usually, this is what you’re doing straight in the morning when he’s still asleep. What keeps you so busy these last days? He has to find out, he-

He almost chokes on himself again, earning a concerned side eye from you. It’s been a week and he’s still sick to the brim. Worry lines decorate your face, palm gently resting against his scorching hot forehead.

“Off to bed with you.”

“Don’t stay up too long, okay? All you seem to do is work these last days”, your husband replies worried himself.

You sigh to yourself. That’s because you do. But leaving your husband to a pile of work after he returns to Jujutsu High only to get sick again? You grab the pen in your hand tighter, force your eyes to fully open. Only a few more days and you’ll be done. After all, you’re doing this for him, right?

Satoru is definitely worth the sleepless nights.

-a few days after-

“Turns out I’m fully back at normal again, babe!”, your husband announces proudly.

You blink against the harsh light of the merciless sun, eyes dry like sand. Only a few hours ago, you returned from a village Satoru was supposed to inspect. Well, minutes turned into hours when a special grade curse appeared out of no where and made your life living hell. The sun already began to rise when you carried yourself back into bed.

But still, you can’t help but smile at him. These last days were rough for him. Him, the strongest, passed out because of a cold. He wasn’t himself all this time, weak body bound into bed with his limbs aching.

“So glad to here that”, you mumble while pressing a gentle kiss onto his lips.

“Sleep in for a while, you look exhausted (y/n). I know you just came back a few hours ago and don’t you dare to lie at me.”

Your eyes widen in an instant, cheeks blushing ever so slightly. You were so careful about leaving and returning, his even and long breaths not giving a single hint that he might be awake.

“I’m heading to Jujutsu High, bet work piled up pretty bad. Wish me good luck and have a good rest princess, I’ll kick their asses if they try to call you!”

With one last loving glance at you, he’s gone. And you can’t help but pass out immediately.

“Guess who’s back to save the day!”, Satoru announces proudly into the room filled with his students and Yaga Masamichi who looks at him with the same disinterest as usual.

“You? Didn’t even know you even exist anymore”, Nobara mumbles while filing down her nails.

“How are you? (y/n) told us you were sick”, Yuji interjects.

“I’m completely back to normal!”

“What a shame”, Megumi mumbles under his breath.

“Sooo, what side of earth do I have to save today? I’m sure a lot of work piled up while I was gone. After all, I’m the strongest.”

Satoru stretches himself playfully, waiting for the director to tell him about all different kinds of missions, curses and teachings he has to deal with these next few days. But instead, he just shrugs his shoulders.

“What? Got nothing to say? Okay, let me guess, what about that special grade curse in the village-“

“Done”, Yaga Masamichi replies dryly.

“The combat training with the first year-“

“Done.”

“Any curses that appeared in Tokyo?”

“Done.”

“Taking care of-“

“Done.”

This can’t be true, the man in front of him has to joke. Apart from you, Satoru is the only special grade sorcerer here at Jujutsu High. No one would ever be able to fulfil some of those missions, let alone teach his students just like that. Not even the director himself is capable of dealing with that special grade curse he was talking about just before Satoru got sick. But who…?

“Didn’t your wife tell you she already managed all those things?”

Oh, he was so stupid that it hurts. All these nights he caught you almost falling asleep on your desk, the multiple times you sneaked out of bed far past midnight, the dark circles under your eyes. All this time, you weren’t only busy with your own missions. No, you actually fulfilled all of his work for him as well.

“Just the amount of work I have to do when I come back. Urgh, being sick sucks.”

“Don’t worry, love. I’m sure you’ll be fine.

Yeah, he sure as hell is. But only because you decided to make your own life living hell for two weeks straight.

“Please don’t tell me (y/n) did all of my stuff while I was gone.”

“I’ll never understand how a kind-hearted woman like her ended up with you. She didn’t even stop when I told her to and somehow managed to get information about the missions I prepared for your sick ass”, the director replies dryly.

“Call her in right now.”

Words aren’t enough to thank you for this. No, you deserve way more than that, way more than his mouth could ever give you.

“And let her leave again in about an hour.”

-an hour later-

“Again, sorry for calling you in, (y/n). Now get back home, you’re free tomorrow.”

“Thank you”, is all you’re able to reply, wobbly feet carrying you back into your car and onto the road.

You sigh to yourself. Well, you definitely didn’t expect the director to call you this early when you just returned from an exhausting mission. But who are you to say no to him? After all, it’s your job to do this, it’s your job to protect the innocent.

But…Is it also your job to answer strange questions from your students in the morning?

“Come on, use your brain! You know what the director said!”, Nobara hisses through gritted teeth, the trio sticking their heads together after you were forced to drop your haircare routine to Nobara.

“Ehm...so…well…”

“If you don’t have any further questions, I’ll go-“

“Yes! I have a question!”, Yuji screams so loudly that his voice echoes through your tired brain.

“What is it, Yuji?”, you mutter with your eyes closed.

“How exactly are babies made, (y/n)-san?”

“You’re an idiot…”, Megumi grumbles.

“Really? This is all you have left in your pea-sized brain?”

“What? You just told me to ask her something and that’s what I came up with!”, Yuji defends himself.

“Yeah, but that ‘something’ definitely didn’t include THAT!”

It’s almost as if they were forced to ask you dumb questions. You’ll definitely have a talk with your husband about their strange behaviour when you caught up on sleep. But before that…

You open the door with a swift motion.

Your heart skips a beat, eyes widen.

The usual so modern and clean living-room is now covered in rose pedals and filled with the fresh scent of sakura leaves, your couch unfolded and covered in the most fluffy blankets, pillows and stuffed animals you’re ever seen. And there he sits.

He, your beloved husband, holding up your bathrobe oh so inviting.

“What’s going on here?”, you breathe out.

Suddenly, all the exhaustion you felt earlier disappeared into thin air. Did he really do all of this for you? The candles flickering, the blankets, the strawberries covered in chocolate waiting on the table, him wearing that black t-shirt you love so much.

“Guess what, I found out what you did. Did you really think you’ll get away with stealing my work in silence?”, he teases, love dripping from each and every word he says.

“It was nothing”, you try to brush him off.

But instead, he gets up and grabs your hand in order to guide you into the dim bathroom that is only lightened by a few candles. Again, the lovely smell of sakura leaves radiates from the bathtub filled with bubbles and hot steam. Just the thought of letting yourself sink into that warm water, to finally release the tension in your sore muscles-

Before you’re even able to comprehend what’s happening, Satoru took off your clothes and lifts you off the ground with ease. Your body doesn’t dare to fight back, too weak from all the missions you completed these last days. Just the tip of your toe, relaxing in the water for a few minutes before returning to Jujutsu High…

“Nothing, huh? So you mean doing the stuff I need a month for in two weeks besides your own missions is nothing? Words can’t express how thankful I am to have such a sweet, caring and steaming hot wife”, he whispers against your ear, his fingers starting to massage your back oh so skilled.

You allow yourself to sink into his touch, to rest your eyes for a few minutes. Well, there is no denying in the fact that this was a little too much for you. All the fighting, the paper work, the heart and soul you poured in each and every work.

And then there’s him. Satoru, your beloved husband, who massages your back with his skilled fingers. How lucky you are to call him your husband, that he decided to spend the rest of his life with you. Even though he scolded you ever so slightly for managing his pile of work, you know he’d do the same for you in a heartbeat. What a treasure, how glad you are to know him, how wonderful he is…

“(y/n)?”, Satoru purrs against your ear.

You don’t response, chest rising and falling slow and steady. He can’t help but smile to himself, admiring he beauty of your finally resting face. Carefully, he lifts you out of the bathtub and covers your body in the fluffy bathrobe you love so much. You definitely deserve some rest for all the work you did these last days.

He can’t help but gently caress your cheek, making sure you’re completely tucked you underneath your favourite blanket.

“What a lucky man I am”, he mutters to himself while outlining your parted lips.

“To call someone so wonderful my wife…”

Tags:

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@lauv4chuuya @sindela @kayleegomez @sunshine7queen @magalimachete

@gatitam @idontknow1123 @creative1writings @sanicsmut @mynahx3

@sad-darksoul @chilichopsticks @chuyasthighs0 @ynackerman9499 @keepghostly

@froufrousnowman @tomiokathedepresso @gojosrealwife @coffeeluvr96 @mahi-tamashi

@chaoticwinnercupcake @lees-chaotic-brain @risuola @sugurulefttesticle @wordskeeper

@baku2345 @polarbvnny @ruixrei @bam-bam-bam-bame-blog @lavenderdrxp

@localhehecat @alicerhr @belovedvamp @wifenanami @dlwlrmas-world

@darkstarlight82 @satoreo @tachiharazsstuff @kentocalls @cheesemachine44

@ryva @komelrebi-san @deezy12299 @okay-it-is-ivy

(this took me forever so if I tagged u be so kind and leave a like/comment/reblog lol)

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chuulyssa · 1 month

Text

🇨 🇴 🇳 🇫 🇪 🇸 🇸 🇮 🇴 🇳 ！

BSD MEN REACTING TO A CONFESSION.

↷ A/N ─ yes new divider again because im indecisive as heck

★ FT. ─ dazai , chuuya , ranpo , akutagawa , atsushi , fyodor

!! TAGS ─ mentions of suicide, insecurities, overall fluff

"i love you."

ᴅᴀᴢᴀɪ.

promptly replies with, "i love you too."

he'll lean into you with an amused smile because he lowkey thinks you're joking

when he realizes you're serious about it he'll immediately stop the stupid grin

and look at you with this sincere look you've never seen on his face before

he'll hold your hand and everything while repeating "i love you too," for a second time, only this time he's serious about it too

definitely asks for double suicide later

"You know it's my motto to unalive myself with a beautiful woman. How lucky of you to have been bestowed upon this honour."

"Mhm."

"I'll say yes if you join me in a double suicide," he asks with puppy eyes.

"Dazai, you already said yes."

"I'll say it again!"

ᴄʜᴜᴜʏᴀ.

he stops abruptly and half chokes on his expensive ass wine

poor boy is really confused 😭 because "where did that come from??"

he tries to play it cool but he's literally SCREAMING inside

we all know he's been betrayed a lot of times in the past so he feels hesitant about it

will decide to give it a shot tho

100% calls dazai to brag about it

"You may be taller or whatever (as if that matters in the first place) but were you the one able to steal her heart? Eh? I think not!"

You chuckle hearing him update his rival of his new relationship status.

"And anyway," he raises a glass of wine for toast. "I'd like to thank my good looks, good looks and did I mention my good looks (?) for making tonight the happiest night ever."

ʀᴀɴᴘᴏ.

"i know."

he has always observed every single thing about you - how you behave around others vs how you behave around him, the little times you look at him like you want his attention etc etc

he's known about this since like soooo long

he defo also knew when where and how you were gonna confess

went to yosano for tips to react to it and bought you chocolates and stuff. he thinks it'll make you happy :D

eats all of that himself even tho he originally bought it for you but you let it slide because he's a cutie patootie

"You could at least have been a bit subtle about it," he says, munching on his chips. "I mean, anyone who saw you would've been able to guess. I didn't even need my ability for this!"

He lifts his chin up thoughtfully, fingers ripping open another packet of snacks. "You should be grateful I'm not a snitch. Eh, well," he shrugs, "You're now dating the greatest detective in the world! Congratulations!"

ᴀᴋᴜᴛᴀɢᴀᴡᴀ.

"eh???"

like chuuya, he's pretty confused too

"are you sure?"

tries to keep a straight face and hide his fluster

he'll narrow his eyes at you as if he's trying to read your emotions. he doesn't wanna get hurt if he gets too attached to you and you two end up breaking up

also how tf is he supposed to believe that someone like YOU like someone like HIM?

reassure him that he's perfect please :( poor baby deserves the world

"I am a lot of work. I don't think you can keep up with all of that," he says shortly.

"I'll try my best."

"You don't have to."

"But I want to!"

He stares at you for a few moments, looking like he's about to cry.

"Oh, alright then," he waves a hand around. "But don't you ever leave me."

ᴀᴛꜱᴜꜱʜɪ.

screams

"SAY IT AGAIN PLEASE!"

jumps around everywhere in happiness

you dont even get a verbal answer the man's just dancing around

either that or he just faints

he's, like akutagawa, insecure about himself. but he's much more open to showing his emotions to you.

you end up cuddling the whole night or he calls off work to be with you for the rest of the day <3

"I..." he repeats the same word for the fifth time in a row.

"Yes?"

"Don't mind me, I'm just trying to come to terms with the fact that I get to date you."

"Is that a bad thing?"

"No, no!" he panics, wringing both hands all over himself hastily. "I love you! Really!"

ꜰʏᴏᴅᴏʀ.

no reaction. im sorry

spares a small glance at you but otherwise doesn't get distracted from his work

you think he's gone deaf from the way he just ignored you cuz what????

will spend like 15 minutes that way before extending an arm to you and you lowkey DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO??? HELP??

he'll stare at you for a few seconds before pulling you onto his lap and continuing with his work

and that's his way of saying yes

He shuts the computers around him down and taps your outer thigh twice. You immediately stand up and help him up. He stares at you for a few seconds, contemplating something.

"You know, I never thought I'd enable others to call me a lovesick fool."

"Does that mean you are a lovesick fool?"

"A little, maybe," he turns around and walks out of the door while you follow him with a soft smile on your face.

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lalacliffthorne · 8 months

Text

modern!batboys as (your) roommates - headcanons.

because let's be honest, we have all thought about that at some point.🦇

(this is the introduction of my new drabble universe!!! I can´t tell you how fucking excited I am.)

it would be wrong to say that your life was boring before you met the three idiots you now call your roommates

sure, it wasn't as exciting

but you had your tiny little apartment, went out with friends once in a while and mostly enjoyed having your own space and routines

but then

shit hits the fan

and by shit I mean your landlord

because of a loophole in the rental agreement, he's able to kick you out of your apartment with only a months notice

in other words

you're fucked

or, as your best friend Feyre, who you met the first week of orientation and became inseperable with, says -

"That bastard." Feyre's eyes are stormy.

"What the hell am I gonna to do?" You bury your face in your hands, your voice muffled when you mumble: "How am I supposed to find a new apartment in a few weeks? For this one, I looked over a year, and it's a glorified shoebox!" Your voice rises as you feel a wave of dread crash over you and your heart rising into your throat.

"Hey, it's okay. If worst comes to worst, you can crash at my place,", Feyre raises her brows, "even though we'd have to share my bed, but - I won't just let you sleep on a park bench if that's what you're worried about. Unless you find another glorified shoebox that's technically out of your budget, it's you and me, crashing on my bed, climbing over your stuff to get to the bathroom, finding out what married life would feel like."

even though you love her to death, that really does not sound like an option you want to explore

so you try everything

scouring every paper for apartment advertisments, posting on your uni's socials, going to all the viewings you can find -

nothing

but just when you're ready to just give up

a miracle happens

the miracle is 5'5, has impeccable style and hair, a love for deep red lipstick and drops by for lunch

Mor has been your friend for two years now, since you almost spilled your coffee over her laptop at the library

(she's still not letting you live that down)

she also likes to get you out of your comfort zone

"Are you serious?" Mor stares at you wide-eyed.

"Yep." You tiredly stir your coffee. "I've been turned away for twenty apartments in the past few days alone. I'm aready seeing myself bunking with Feyre. She offered, but her bed barely fits into her apartment as it is."

Mor breathes a giggle before hastily clearing her throat. "Sorry."

You grin weakly before rubbing your face. "I don't know what I'm gonna do. I know it could be even worse, but -"

"It already feels pretty shitty,", Mor ends. You sigh in confirmation and are about to change the topic, because you haven't seen the blonde in weeks and feel bad about ruining your lunch. But before you can open your mouth, Mor suddenly squints in thought. Then she looks at you.

"How much do you value your privacy?

Given the fact you'll be basically homeless on the street in about a week if you don't find a new place - not much.

Mor begins to grin, and there's a bright twinkle in her eyes.

"Well, then I might just have the solution."

the next day, Mor drags you downtown

she takes you to an old but sophisticated building you wouldn't even dream about living in

a single month's rent there would probably empty your whole bank account

but Mor just winks and pulls you up the stairs

on the third floor, a guy leans in an open door

and that

is how you meet Rhys.

Mor's cousin is annoyingly beautiful

tall, with perfectly tousled dark hair, a perfect grin that causes his cheeks to crease and, from the looks of it, the also perfect physique

he's also annoyingly charming

if you'd met him somewhere without Mor, you would have probably gaped for a moment before catching onto the mischievous twinkle in his nearly violet eyes and promptly avoided him, because someone that pretty had to have some fault

as it turns out, Rhys' fault is offering practical strangers to live with him without even batting an eye

"What?"

You blink at Mor from where you just sank onto one of the two very comfortable couches, because she can't possibly -

"Okay, before you freak out, just listen, okay?" Mor is grinning giddily. "The guys have a free room they don't really use anyway and you really need a new place - so you could just move in here!" She beams. "The place is definitely big enough, and you'd fit in perfectly, I promise! They're just as chaotic as you, but also very responsible -"

"Mostly." Rhys' eyes are twinkling. He's looking completely and slightly concerningly unbothered by the prospect of you, a factual stranger, moving in with him and his friends.

"- they don't have any bad habits, they're fairly neat -"

"Mostly."

Mor widens her eyes at you. "It's perfect!"

You blink at her.

"I've already talked to my roommates." Rhys' deep voice is almost soothing - mostly because he sounds a lot calmer than Mor, steady and reassuring.

"If you want, this can be temporary, until you find a place just for yourself, but this way you don't have to stress about needing to find a place in a certain time, plus,", he cracks a grin, "I don't like the idea of you having to crash on somebody's couch in the foreseeable future, that's just bullshit if we got a free room here no one uses anway. And if this works,", one corner of his lips quirks even more until his grin is a lot closer to the wicked twinkle in his eyes, "none of us would mind another roommate."

"You don't have to decide right now." Mor smiles brightly. "But I think it would be great, and you'd make a bargain with the rent, because Rhys loves to play sugar daddy -", her cousin flips her off, "and I think this would be a really good idea." She grins, suddenly a little sheepish.

if you weren't so desperate, you would whip out about a dozen arguments about why this probably isn't a good idea

like the fact that rooming with three dudes sounds like a lot of testosteron, or that you don't even know them, and that they don't even know you -

but from the way Rhys lounges in his chair, smirking easily while Mor beams at you, he doesn't seem to see too much of a problem in that

also you are very, very desperate

but there's still that one thing -

"About those roommates -"

When you hear the door, you raise your head, your heart doing a slightly concerning flip in your chest.

It's a day later, and you just finished the tour of the apartment Rhys has given you. Even though it's huge and very grand with it's high ceilings decorated with stucco and the original hardwood floors, it feels warm and cozy. The room you'd be sleeping in is as big as your whole current apartment, light with two big window and a view of the trees on the street outside.

It kind of makes you wonder where the catch is.

Maybe it's about to walk through the door.

You hear a deep voice and heavy footsteps, then a dude appears in the door to the kitchen.

Your heart does a somersault, and you feel your lips part a bit. Because frankly, it's a miracle he makes it through the door without hitting his head.

The guy's huge. His shoulders and chest strain against his t-shirt; he looks like one of those dudes who basically have muscle in their DNA, all corded muscle under ridiculously wide shoulders and a solid middle, muscular long legs under black jeans -

And you're staring.

Big time.

The dude's looking over his shoulder, which means he thankfully doesn't notice you oggling him. The half of his hair that isn't pulled back in a bun brushes against his neck when he grins, his cheeks creasing. He's really good looking, in a rugged kinda way, with his roughly curved jaw and the scar on the side of his face, and when he looks back ahead, his eyes twinkle warmly.

Then, behind him, another guy appears in the doorway, and your breath catches.

Because if Rhys is annoyingly beautiful, the guy in the door is drop-dead gorgeous.

Just like the other two, he's tall and all lean muscle. His shoulders shift under his black t-shirt as he leans against the doorframe, his hands sliding into the pockets of his black jeans. His eyes look like amber in sunlight, his dark hair is tousled, a strand curving over his forehead. His face is all angles and soft lips, with dark brows that look like he likes to crunch them in a scowl, but right now, he looks fairly relaxed, though his gaze is watchful.

And on yours.

Feeling warmth wash into your cheeks, you hastily look away while crap, crap, crap echoes through your head, because of course he caught you staring.

On to a really great start here.

Your gaze grazes his hands and the bit of uneven skin that merges into veiny, tan forearms before your eyes trail over the tattoos scattered over them, some peaking out from his sleeves.

There's the sound of someone clearing their throat, and you feel the heat in your cheeks deepen when your eyes dart up and meet Rhys', a twinkle in his iris when he sends you a lazy grin.

"Boys, this is Y/N." He raises a brow. "Our new roommate."

and that is how you meet Cassian and Azriel

it almost makes you reconsider

because you're really not sure you're gonna survive rooming with three guys that pretty

but after thinking it over for a couple of days, you realize that you really don't have a choice

and so a week later, Rhys and Cassian come over to your apartment to help you move the first half of your stuff

neither blink an eye at the fact it's about the size of a broom closet in comparison to their home

Rhys does however scowl when he sees the condition of the bathroom

you're ready to sink into the floor when you hastily explain pretty much all the apartments in the building look like that

(a lil dingy and moldy)

but when he turns, Rhys just glowers and grumbles under his breath about how he'd like to rip your landlord a new one

it's the first time you realize that under all the aloofness and swagger and cheeky grins, Rhys cares

it's proven again when you move into your new room a week later and there's a new mattress on the also new bed

you haven't bought either of them, but when you try to protest, Rhys just huffs about your back probably being fucked up because of your old one and about how he'll add it to your rent

he never does

you get used to rooming with three guys surprisingly quickly

sure, it is pretty much a total 180 -

going from living alone in a tiny apartment

to sharing a huge flat with three dudes who make the place vibrate with laughter and bicker like they have been married for thirty years

but even tho you never thought you'd be the type to actually enjoy having roommates

you find that with them - you don't really mind

of course it is nice to have the place to yourself sometimes

and after about two weeks, you're comfortable enough to blast your music and dance through the kitchen when you're alone

(yes, at some point, they catch you - it takes you about a minute to realize there are three guys standing in the doorway, watching you dance with a broom. you get a mild heart attack and Cassian and Rhys start cackling while Azriel smirks)

but even if usually there's always someone around -

you find that all three of them are very good at both respecting your boundaries and leaving you be when you need to curl up in your room

but also seem to know when you need someone to drag your ass out into the world

and something about knowing at least one of them will probably be there when you get home makes you feel very warm and fuzzy

and even tho you weren't completely sure about this situation in the beginning

you get roped into living with the three guys instead of just rooming with them pretty easily

it really starts with Cassian

probably gets used to you living there the quickest

after barely a week, he's treating you like you've lived with them since the beginning

like just sticking his head into your room and making you help him with dinner

it surprises you a little that they all have dinner together

from what you've heard from friends who have roommates, they usually all do their own thing most of the time

but it makes you realise that these guys are more family than just roommates

Cassian is surprisingly easy to talk to

he's quick with the quips and the banter

also very flirtatious

constantly makes you laugh, his deep, boisterous chuckles infectous

also super affectionate

you're convinced the man is actually just a huge teddybear

after just a few weeks, you're used to hugs that lift you off your feet

cheek kisses as greetings

and being casually lifted out of the way like you don't weigh anything

not that you're the only one who gets that treatment

no, there are hugs in greeting that make Rhys groan dramatically like his air supply is cut off

and pats on the shoulder and smacking forehead kisses that make Azriel crinkle his nose

Cassian quickly becomes the one you go to when you need advice

he always listens attentively

doesn't sugarcoat things

stays objective while never making you feel bad or less about anything

and it quickly becomes pretty clear he'd put everything aside if any of you ever need help

gives you rides in his beat up truck to uni

and always picks you up when studying at the library gets late bc he doesn't like the idea of you out alone after dark

with Cass, even mundane things like grocery shopping become fun

he's just casually funny and teases the shit out of you at every opportunity

has no understanding of the concept of personal space

and with most people, that would kinda put you off a little in the beginning

but Cassian just has something about him

something so inheritly good and warm and sunny

that he never once makes you feel uncomfortable

if anything, with him around, you feel a lot more at ease

and not just bc it's always nice to have a guy in your back that towers over you like a lighthouse

though the whole massive, tatted dude with the dark eyes thing kinda goes out of the window as soon as he grins at you

dimples and all

but still, don't be fooled

when the grin's gone and he's glaring, you know why people make way for him immediately

he works at a gym to earn some money at the side

once, he takes you with him just for fun

then that one time becomes another and before you know it, you tag along twice a week

and it would be wrong to say it's not doing something to you when he crouches in front of or behind you, his deep voice rumbling as he mumbles encouragements

"Alright, come on, sweetheart, gimme one more."

Trying not to make a very embarassing groaning sound, you crunch your face in concentration and slowly lower yourself into a squat, your muscles trembling slightly.

"There you go, that's it." You can feel Cassian in your back, spotting you, his deep voice rumbling through you, and it's just almost distracing enough for you to -

"No, no, come on, you can do it." Cassian's deep chuckle sets you at ease, and he lightly pats the side of your thigh. "You got this, c'mon."

With a soft groan, you push yourself up again, and you can hear the triumph and wide grin in Cassian's voice when he goes: "Yeeessss, good job, baby. C'mon, you can do one more."

Blowing out a heavy breath and glaring at nothing in particular, you ready yourself.

when one day, he makes you lose focus, you're gonna throw something at him

you're pretty sure he does it on purpose just to see how red you can get

but Cass is really good at pushing you without overdoing it, always teasing and encouraging

and if you manage to do something, in the gym or otherwise, he grins so widely you're almost sure he's more proud of you than you are yourself

Rhys is a flirt.

and after you get over the first initial blush that just won't leave you alone for the first few weeks

it actually becomes entertaining

now bantering back and forth is basically all you do

it gets so bad, Azriel constantly rolls his eyes at the two you

but just like you suspected, behind all the flirtiness and mischievous grins

Rhys cares

a lot

whenever you're upset, he looks like he's contemplating ripping apart whatever or whoever made you upset

and whenever someone has a go at Cass or Azriel, Rhys picks them apart with lethal precision and a wicked smile

if Cassian is most affectionate, Rhys is close second

he's slightly more casual about it

pinching your nose, flicking your ear softly, offering his cheek for a kiss in greeting

always down for amazing hugs tho

whenever you get on your period, Rhys turns full mother hen

it's actually quite entertaining to see a 6-foot-something dude grumble because you don't want to take painkillers

"I just don't like to take them until it's really necessary, okay?" You glower at Rhys, curling up on the couch and trying to suppress a wince.

Rhys incredulously narrows his eyes.

"You're bleeding from inner organs and look like you want to curl into the couch. I'd say it is pretty necessary."

behind all the snark and arrogance, Rhys cares

also seems to have a rather unhealthy tendency to put everyone else first

you catch on pretty easily that even though his father is absolutely loaded, Rhys doesn't particularly cares about his money

in fact

he doesn't hesitate to spend whatever money his father pumps into his bank accounts for a second

when you ask Mor about it, she just smiles lopsidedly.

"I think it's his kind of protest?" She squints into the sun shining onto the balcony of the flat, the big glass of iced tea in her hand glittering in the light. "You know, spending all that money, preferably on his friends? Mostly because I don't think his father really likes them."

You wince.

"He knows he can't win against his father." Mor crunches her brows in thought. "I think he came to terms with having to take over the business one day, and he cares about the people who have their jobs there, so he won't let them down. It's just hard sometimes, if your whole life is already planned out for you." She shrugs gently. "Doing this, living with Cassian and Azriel and now you, spending his fathers money on it and actually having a good time instead of just being bitter and stuck up - it's his way of not surrendering completely."

you have never met Rhys' father, but even tho he's powerful af

you really feel a strong desire to kick him in the balls

Rhys has a knack of knowing exactly when you need to talk and when you need to be distracted

it's not unusual that after a bad day, he just joins you on the couch, plopping down and pulling your feet onto his lap

it either leads to you venting and him listening

usually giving very appropriate responses of either huffs, scowls or downright glowering

or, if you don't want to talk

he either lets you use him as a human pillow, grumbling over your choice of movie while scratching your head

or he takes you out

to the cinema, a museum, the theater -

you're pretty sure you've grown a lot more cultured in a few months than the whole of your life before that

it never gets boring tho

the whole thing kinda annoys the crap out of you in the beginning bc he never lets you pay for anything

but you get better at finding ways to pay him back in other ways

like taking over making dinner on days when he's exhausted

coaxing rants out of him when his father gets to him

dragging him out on nightly walks through the city when he can't sleep

and after a while

you understand that it's just one of Rhys' love languages

and it is fun to spend his father's money ;)

especially when it means museum Saturdays with the two of you just sitting and staring at paintings

or going to the cinema and pigging out on popcorn and greasy stuff while whisper-hissing fun facts at each other

even takes you to stuff like wine tastings

Rhys is a foodie

likes super fancy pickles, trying food you can't even pronounce and splurging on dinner

and if he decides the two of you need to get out of the apartment

one way or another

it usually ends in a restaurant

always orders like half the menu

also cooks the best out of all of you

like I'm talking freaking perfection

whips up the fanciest, most delicious far-too-many-courses meal for holidays

and goes all in even if he just makes dinner

you often get lured into the kitchen by the delicious smells

usually ends up with you on the couch at the table while Rhys moves around the kitchen

talking about everything and nothing

(also not above slapping anyone's hand away if they try to sneak a taste)

Azriel is quiet

not shy; you catch onto that pretty quickly

he's too quick and easy on any dry remark in response to his friends' boisterous teasing for that

and his gaze too firm and piercing

rarely shies away when you catch his gaze

in the beginning

that intimidated the shit out of you

the way he appears without a sound, towering over you, all dark and quiet and brooding

it's like he perfected the art of going unnoticed

tho you're not quite sure how

bc how could anyone not notice him?

after a while tho

you realise that even tho Azriel is dark and glowering and brooding

there's something gentle about him

it surfaces in the smallest things

like how his lips curve the softest bit when you grin up at him

how light and careful his touch is

how he is always respectful, putting himself between you and the street, holding doors open without ever seeming to think twice about it

and how everything about him seems to darken when he witnesses anyone being treated poorly

but even if anger rages within him like a quickly rising tide, quiet and dangerous

you still always feel safe with him

maybe it's bc, even in those moments, you just know it will never be directed at you

and that even tho there's always that darkness within him, it's never something that feels unsettling or dangerous

and instead soft and welcoming

like something about him and that steady, dark gaze just calms you

maybe because he's so quiet, Azriel seems to see and hear everything

in record time, he begins to catch onto every little detail about you

mundane things

like how you like your favorite drink or what your favorite ice cream is

the only reason you know he notices is because he begins to hand you cups in the morning that are exactly right and the freezer starts to always hold a big container of your favorite ice cream

but also seems to know exactly what your tell is when you're nervous

uncomfortable

or tired

what makes you upset

happy

nervous

what causes you to giggle uncontrollably

and so on

it should probably unsettle you, how easily he sees through you

but it doesn't

sure, it's a bit weird at first

but you quickly realise it's strangely comforting - that someone pays enough attention to know even the smallest thing about you

Azriel is your favorite person to be around when you just need a break

it's like something about him is grounding, steady

like being around him makes your thoughts calm down

makes it easier for you to sort the chaos your mind sometimes becomes

you quickly realise that beneath all of the quiet watchfulness lies a wicked, dry sense of humor

his mumbled remarks make you snort laughter or beam widely up at him

always makes his lips curve

he reads a ton

when you first see his room, you almost gape

because the man has books

they fill the shelves

balance in towers on the floor

sit on the window sill and next to his bed

most of the books in the shelves in the living room are his as well

has a great dislike for movie adaptions

sits there with that scowl of his, glaring at you until it's over when you make him watch one

says it destroys the pictures in his head

(to be fair

you don't think he's entirely wrong about that)

always has a camera in reach

got a few, all older ones; no fancy digital ones, but all on film

just like he seems to catch onto everything

so does his camera

it's like the manifestation of his quiet perception of things

to fix things onto film

he captures everything

most of the time, you don't even notice

only sometimes you raise your head to find the camera in his hands, a slight curve to his lips

develops all pictures himself, in a dark room on campus students can book

spends hours in there, just working in silence

there's usually a lot of bugging involved before he shows the developed pictures to anyone

usually ends in all of you leaning over them eagerly, trying to figure out when he took them

Rhys standing in the kitchen, grinning over his shoulder like Cassian just made a bad joke

you and Feyre, laughing so hard you lean into each other

Mor, lying upside down on the couch while focusing on the cards in her hand while you're next to her, mid-motion, a focused expression on your face

Cassian napping on the couch, twisted in a very uncomfortable position to fit all six feet something of him onto the cushions

there seems to be an endless number, and they're all carefully stored away in his shelves

some, he refuses to show to anyone

it takes you so little time to feel at home in the huge flat, the prospect of looking for an apartment for yourself is off the table before you can actually start

and it doesn't take long until you're part of the routines like you'd been there since the beginning

Saturday and Sunday evenings are for movie nights

sometimes, Mor joins you

you sit with Azriel on the couch, sharing a big bowl of popcorn while staring at Rhys and Cassian argue about which Star Wars movie to start with

in the summer, you take trips to the lake for swimming and laying in the sun

have game nights

evenings sitting on the balcony, squinting into the setting sun

barbecues

and afternoons in the park, one joining in after the other

in winter, you go to the ice rink

bake together

and spend whole weekends on the couch, watching movies

you go to the gym with Cassian or accompany him on his runs

(well, he's running - you're on your bicycle, because there's no way you can keep up with that dude´s long legs)

or get dragged out onto hikes by Rhys

in the evenings, you usually all end up in the kitchen for dinner, banter thrown over the dinner table

Azriel and you mostly take care of the grocery shopping together

it usually entails you trying to reach something on a high shelf and Azriel huffing, moving to grab it without even having to stretch

sometimes Cassian joins in, and you both make it your mission to annoy Azriel until he cracks a grin

both Az and Rhys regularly give you rides on their motorcycles

while Cassian likes to stick to his old, beat up truck, Rhys has a car as well, but alternates between it and the motorcycle

more often than not, he uses it as opportunity to flirt

small cleaning duties in the apartment are rotated between the four of you

but big-once-a-month-deep-cleans are something you make a day of

blasting music, you divide the flat and get to work

(bathroom duty is rotated)

in the (very rare) case of an argument, it usually ends in one of you being mediator

which means after a cooling off period

the arguing parties are locked in the pantry until they've talked things out

works surprisingly well

sometimes, the boys bring someone home

it usually comes with a text

or the very oldschool sock on the door

tho you ban that one after Cassian forgets it

and you walk into the flat unsuspectingly only to be flashed

Cassian apologizes profoundly

after he's done laughing

there are also a few awkward encounters in the hall in the morning that leave you contemplating not running around in just big t-shirts

Feyre still gives you rides to campus and back

but sometimes, it's Azriel waiting in the parking lot instead, leaning against his motorcycle, two helmets next to him

it does not help with the way your heart seems to speed up whenever you find his amber eyes on you

but you're very adamant on pushing that away

it's probably not that serious anyway.

it would be wrong to say your life was boring before you met the three idiots you now call your roomates

but it sure as hell is a lot better now that you have

even if they do drive you a little nuts sometimes

@azrielshadows1nger @waytoomanyteenagefeels

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sabakos · 2 years

Text

You probably don't know another language if you live in the United States and both you and your parents were born here unless you go out of your way to learn it. This is a problem of geography more than it is a moral failing because if you are an American, then learning another language is not immediately useful to you. This is because your options in school are as follows:

Spanish: Second most common language in America. Most people who speak it also speak English and will look at you funny if you know Spanish and will not appreciate you being able to eavesdrop on their conversations. But, it's the only non-English language with an appreciable population of native speakers that you can encounter without getting on a plane. However in all likelihood you will probably be taught by a non-native speaker who could not pass an A1 exam and you will learn no Spanish just the same as everyone else.

French: The only French speakers in North America probably don't want to talk to you ever, and if you speak non-Quebecois French at them they really won't want to. You are probably going to major in literary studies and spend the rest of your life pretending to read books no one else actually reads. You have opinions on Freud and Lacan.

German: No one in North America speaks German as their primary language. It's really only useful if you like philosophy or World War II history or want to move to Germany. You probably really like beer and will study abroad and be really annoying about it afterward. But most Germans you are likely to meet outside of Germany speak English somewhat well so you aren't really doing anything for yourself? So most people will also think you're a Wehraboo or worse unless you are Jewish.

Russian: You already speak Russian or another Slavic language at home and will insist that you do not up until the first day of class, when you and all of your classmates will spend the entire time gossiping with the professor in Russian. The few American kids will hang out in the back and probably talk about Dostoevsky and drink vodka out of their water bottles. Everyone will get an A and no one will learn anything new.

Mandarin Chinese: You (or more likely your parents) think "we'll all be speaking Chinese in twenty years" and so you want to get a head start. This attitude self-selects against people who will ever need to know Mandarin. You probably idolize Ezra Pound and use phrases like "command economy" unironically. Every single person from China who has ever met you hates your guts.

Japanese: You are a weeb. All of your classmates are weebs. Your professor may or may not be a weeb, but wants to die regardless. You'll probably give up halfway through the first semester along with the most annoying 80% of the class and switch to Spanish once you realize how hard it is to learn Japanese.

Korean or Arabic: Congratulations on your new job at [redacted]!

Pashto or Urdu or Farsi: Congratulations on your new job at [redacted], but also I really doubt you are supposed to be telling anyone that you are learning this language. Good luck on your future job search.

Navajo: Most Navajo people don't speak any Navajo and unless you live in New Mexico you will literally never meet someone who is Navajo. They don't want to talk to you anyway. I don't think many people ever even try to learn this, this is solely on this list because I've seen insane but clueless Europeans try to guilt Americans for not learning it for some incomprehensible reason.

Latin: Latin is a dead language. I'm sure you are tired of hearing about that by now, which is why I reminded you about it. Even Catholics will make fun of you now for learning this. Your parents probably want you to be a doctor, and will stop talking to you when you drop out of med school. Or maybe you're a classics student who will spend the rest of your life incorrecting historians about pissing contests no one cared about anyway. Go forge a historical demonology book or get off to a picture of Thomas Aquinas or Cicero or something, I don't know.

Ancient Greek: Oh, are you a theology student or something learning Biblical Koine? The Evangelical Christians don't care what the bible actu- ...No? You're learning Attic Greek? And you're not like, a linguistics or classics major or something, you chose to do this specifically. Hey, uh, are you doing anything later? Or right now, even?

#posting #language learning

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maxarchive · 7 months

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CHAMPION’S PRESS CONFERENCE

Q. Max Verstappen you are a three-time world champion. How good does that sound? I mean, of course it sounds great. It's something I never even really dreamt of. It's, of course, a very proud moment for myself, for my family, my close family. I think everyone within the team I'm working with, you know, to be able to experience all of this together is amazing. And I said it on the radio already on the in-lap. Of course, we talk about performance and, you know, you can always thank the team for that, but I also find the whole atmosphere and how much I enjoy working with all these people, I find that probably even more important. It's very important to come to the track and know that you have nice people to work with.

Q. Of your three titles, where do you rank this one? This one is the best one. I think the first one was the most emotional one, because that's when your dreams are fulfilled in F1. But this one is definitely… It has been my best year. Yeah, well, so far, you know, consecutive wins and stuff like that, and the car itself has been probably in the best shape as well. So for me, this one is probably the one I’m most proud of in a way because of consistency.

Q. At what point in the season did you know you had the title in your hands? Well, not until this point, right? But no, of course the momentum was growing and race after race the gap was getting bigger. So I was just, you know, looking at myself, just trying to go through every single weekend trying to get the best out of it. That for me at that time is more important than dreaming about the title, because dreaming doesn't really bring you anywhere. It's about the effort and work you put in to try and achieve your goals.

Q. Christian Horner says you're operating at a level he's never previously seen. Do you think you've raised your game this year, to a new level? I keep trying to improve. And of course, I don't necessarily think I have become a faster driver, but you have a lot more experience in the car. You grow as a driver, you grow also, I think, as a person in life. And I think all these kinds of things, when I compare to my first season in Formula 1, they help you a lot in terms of just dealing with every kind of pressure situation throughout the weekend, you know, everything that might be thrown at you and in difficult conditions, for example. And in the end it's all about you know, trying to deliver every single weekend, which is I think very hard in Formula 1.

Q. Where have you felt the most pressure this year, which race? It’s a good question. I don't know. I mean, it has to also do with track conditions or whatever. For example, the race in Zandvoort, when you're driving on slicks and it's raining, and I know of course I normally enjoy driving in the wet, but I also know that I'm leading the championship and if I go off and I'm stuck, you know, you lose a lot of points. So naturally, you're always driving a little bit under the limit, but that can be, in a way, dangerous as well. So probably when I was out there on slicks, you feel a bit pressured. Sometimes there are people behind you that are a bit faster, because they have nothing to lose. So it's a very different mindset as well that you're in when you are fighting for a championship.

Q. When you look back at the season as a whole, can we just talk about some of the highlights? Best win? It's a few. I think my win in Miami, I really enjoyed. Spa, Zandvoort, but also Suzuka, like, winning the Constructors’ for example with the team there was fantastic. It's difficult to really pick one to be honest. Q. What about the most satisfying pole position? Probably Suzuka. Yeah, I've had a few. I mean, OK, maybe it didn't count but the one in Spa probably that I enjoyed – those kinds of conditions where you really have to pull it out of the bag. But yeah, in Suzuka the car was on rails. It was unbelievable to drive. And, you know, while driving, I was smiling and that's quite rare in a qualifying lap.

Q. Knowing that there's nothing you like more than winning, this year, with the good package you have, you can out-score score Alain Prost’s victories and also you could reach Sebastian Vettel. Is this your goal right now? Yeah, of course I want to win as much as I can. I know that from third place to second is quite a big gap. So I hope maybe in my career I might end up somewhere there in the middle. That would be nice. But I don't know, it depends a lot on what's going to happen in the next few races and the next few years as well. I don't know how long this is going to last. I'm enjoying the moment and I think that's also very important. I’ve achieved more than I could have ever even dreamed of, or set any goals that I wanted to achieve in F1, right? So I'm loving the moment. We'll see where we end up but it's already way more than I ever thought I could achieve. So it's perfect.

Q. Max, you mentioned the package. How would you rate Honda's contribution to this third championship? It's massive. It's the chassis together with the engine that allows you to achieve these kinds of things. I'm very happy to work with Honda. I always have been. They are amazing people, they’re always super polite but also super motivated and always willing to listen and of course willing to improve. And so yeah, they will always have a special place in my heart even when, of course, they leave at the end of ‘25. But for now, let's just enjoy the moment together. And yeah, I'm very proud also for them, from where we started as a team together and where we are at now. I think we can all be very proud of that.

Q. Max, on the radio after you crossed the line Christian rattled off the names of the other three-time World Champions and he said, it's not a bad list. I know you're not really one for records but in terms of the names you're joining, and maybe going to now surpass in the years to come, do you think about the legacy that you're going to leave in Formula 1 or is it still very much focused on the here and now? I find it always a tricky one because I'm not in Formula 1 to leave a legacy in a way. I'm here to win and I'm here to try to do the best I can and try to enjoy the moment with the people who helped me achieve these things. That's, for me, way more important than trying to leave a legacy. But yeah, it's something that I never thought was possible, to be in that list. When you see those names, you're like, wow! that's incredible what these people have achieved in their careers and now you're alongside them. It is, of course, an amazing feeling.

Q. Max, firstly, how do you intend to celebrate tonight? And do you think that might have any bearing on tomorrow's Grand Prix? And secondly, I don't want to keep going back to it but obviously you’ve won three titles in three years, you've wrapped them up pretty speedily, you must be looking at Michael on seven, Lewis on seven and thinking I can get there. I could get to eight. The first one, yeah, I guess quite a few sparkling waters tonight but I'll be here tomorrow! Yeah, to be honest, the second one… it's a bit different to some other sports where you can really set out targets and you’re like, if I just keep myself in a good shape then these kind of things are possible or whatever. In F1 it doesn't always work like that so I just live in the moment. And like I said before, I've already achieved way more than I ever thought I would.

Q. So shortly after your title, you’re already talking about tomorrow and about the remaining races that you want to perform, that you want to win. I didn't expect anything else but do you fear that there will become a moment in your life that that insatiable hunger is not there anymore? For sure. Yeah, I think that that's normal. I don't think that someone will… Of course, I'm still very young but at one point I think you've had enough. I think everyone at one point has that if that is because you realise that your body can't handle it anymore in some sports then you have to accept that. And you have to just, in a way retire, but for sure, at one point, you might want to do other stuff or race a bit less, absolutely. But not right now.

Q. A similar note to what Ben was just saying, the difference between all three of your titles. In 2021 you fought against Mercedes all the way to the end. Last year, it was against Ferrari, OK, their challenge fell away. This year, your only rival really was within your own team and even that didn't last very long. How did it feel not having to really go against another team this year? Well, of course for F1 you would like to see more competition, but for me, I don't need any other team or like a team-mate to get the best out of myself. I'm putting a lot of pressure on myself to always try and be the best I can, try to prepare in the best possible way. That's what I enjoy and that's the only thing that I really look at.

Q. Max, is it a bit of a shame that you don't get your hands on the World Championship trophy for another six weeks or so? You're given that P2 plaque by the FIA president in Parc Fermé but would you rather get your hands on the trophy for being the World Champion there and then? It’s OK, they look the same. I have two at home so they're not changing. It's just one extra name on it. But it's OK, I can wait a little bit. Yeah, I got one next to my sim rig and one next to the TV.

#max verstappen #f1 #qatar gp 2023 #pc

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burning-academia-if · 22 days

Note

I'm so sorry for all the notifications lmao I'm going around liking every ask because i haven't been on the page for a bit. And why the fuck is all the asks making me like Lars. I don't want to like Lara because Lara doesn't want to like my MC.. i already have enough problems with Rook 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

I need to stay away from these problematic ROs. 😭

Oh quessssstiiioooon someone's probably asked this before but I've seen it on a few blogs. But since magic is obvs a thing. If someone cursed MC or gave them something that could only be broken by true love's kiss (especially since mc doesn't really have the healthiest relationship with those they are close to so who would think they could break a spell like that)

and it's after they've confessed to the ROs. How would they react to MC not waking up at first after they kissed them... but waking up after they've started having a major meltdown after all?

If you have gotten this ask could i please have a link because finding anything on tumblr is... 😒

And i literally fall in love with this goddamn IF every time i read anything on this page. It's a curse in itself... I hope you have a lovely weekend 🤣😇💜

Omg never apologize for mass liking, that's literally anyone on Tumblr's lifeblood lol

Also you know, I feel like Lars, despite being the biggest asshole of the ROs, is still less of a handful then Rook lmfaO good luck with dealing with them!

Also I have not been asked this one before! Felt very inspired it with, so I turned it into a prompt!

Rook:

You’re so still against the touch of his lips. You’re still even after he pulls away. His chest buzzes so loud it echoes in his ears. You don’t move, not even the flutter of your lashes and he should have known. How can he be your true love, when he spent so many years running away?

Whoever it is, would look you in the eyes when you said you loved them. They’re someone who would have taken you in their arms instead of turning away again and again. He sinks to his knees, hands clutching at the side of the bed where you lay. Tears burn at his eyes, but not a single one falls.

Even before he made this foolish decision, he knew. All that’s left is to find the one could wake up. If you’re life lays in the hands of someone else, a fact he always knew, then so be it.

He’ll let you go, like he should have so long ago. He will. He just needs another moment here with you before he turns away. He needs to hear your heartbeat and the cadence of your breathing for one last time.

Time passes as slow as honey, thick and opaque. His body is listless. In the silence, your breath catches and he blinks. Turns. You take another shaky breath, and when your eyes open, he’s on his feet.

“MC!” He gathers you in his arms, holding on tight. “Oh, thank god. I thought I lost you. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.”

His forehead falls against your shoulder, and the tears finally fall. Your awake, your body is warm. And maybe, just maybe, he really does have a chance to make things right.

Beck:

When you don’t move after he pulls away, he doesn’t waver. Magic is strange, it can effect everyone differently, and with how much magic has affected you, he isn’t concerned that there isn’t an immediate response.

Instead, he takes a seat next to where you lay. He brings his knees up to his chest and tells you about all the things you’ve missed. The first flowers of spring, the new used bookstore that opened up on the corner, school events, and class drama.

The time ticks down, and it pricks at his heart. He keeps talking. About himself, about his life, about how he first fell for you, about how you are the warmth of the fire on a winter day, and if even if he isn’t your true love, then that’s ok. He’s just so glad he was able to have any time with you at all.

At some point, his throat is dry and he’s run out of words. What can he say, as the sky turns a dusty orange. He swallows, eyes fluttering closed and feel the first of the tears fall. If it isn’t him to wake you up, then who will it be? And how long will you be cursed to sleep until they find you?

A world without your laugh is far worse than a world where the two of you aren’t meant to be.

Then.

You shift beside him, and he goes still. When he looks, he sees your eyes flutter open, eyebrows furrowing as you look at him.

“…You’re awake.” He says, voice barely above a whisper. He brushes his fingers against your cheek, so impossibly gently. “You’re awake.”

He laughs, a watery, trembly sort of laugh, as he runs a thumb against your cheek. You’ll still be with him.

Rhea:

“Please wake up.” She whispers, kneeling next to you. There is no sign the kiss did anything. It’s fine, this isn’t the end of the world. She has had the logic of magic seared into her brain, and she knows how it works. She’ll wait. She can wait.

But still, you remain still. She gets up and moves around, to give her body something to do as she waits. She’s not good at that, waiting. She always needs to be in the midst of doing something. Making progress. When something’s out of her hands like this, she feels like she’s in freefall.

There might be a chance, she thinks as time ticks by, that you and her aren’t the ones for each other. Somehow, it makes the anxious energy in her gut easier to deal with. As long as she doesn’t think of the heartbreak that will hit the moment she leaves your side, it gives her a plan. Something to work towards. Steps to map out to figure out where to go from here and how to wake you up. The process of even finding the one who could do so.

She’s on step four when your fingers twitch. She goes still in response. All her thoughts scatter. Like a deer in headlights she watches you, wondering if it was just her imagination. But then your body shifts and she’s next to you again, softly calling your name.

“MC? Can you…can you hear me darling?” When you blink away, she feels a smile bloom despite herself. You’re awake and well and still hers.

Zoe:

There’s doubt in their chest even before they press a kiss against your lips. For it to be them? They’re not the kind of person who makes it into fairytales. They know this. Stories are the sort of thing they’ve studied their entire life. They exist on the other side of the glass, able to peer in but never able to be.

As you remain still, they stand and lean back on their heel. Whoever your true love is, it isn’t them. It isn’t that they doubt your love, but it’s hard to imagine that kind of forever for them. If this was the fate they were dealt, then so be it. And even so, you were their first love, and that’s a kind of special whatever comes next can’t take away. Even on different paths, even living different lives, you can both still be a fond memory for the other.

But god, they’ve never experience heartbreak either or the way it collides into their body and leaves them breathless. They wanted this. Every moment with you was a dream they never thought they’d get a chance to see. They were awkward and clumsy, and they were the luckiest person alive to have been able to met you.

They press a hand against their mouth, to stop the sob that’s trying to break through them. The image of you blurs as tears collect in their eyes and stream down their cheeks. They squeeze their eyes shut, trying to collect themselves.

It’s why it startles them, when they feel a hand reaching out, “…Zoe?”

They choke on a gasp, eyes flying open to see you awake. You’ve pulled yourself up, and your eyes are open. It strikes them so suddenly, they all but throw themselves against you. Any embarrassment they used to feel is gone. They’ll never let themselves hesitate again.

Lars:

“You would get yourself cursed.” He whispered against your lips as he pulls away. He doesn’t believe in true love or soulmates. For a curse to be based on the concept, it must make it the flimsiest curse to have been made. All it really needs is love and faith and stubbornness. Maybe his faith is lacking, but he sure as hell can make up for it with stubbornness.

So he waits. He leans his head back, closes his eyes, and wonders how long it will take. His hand toys with your fingers absently. With you asleep, you won’t be able to comment on the display. He still remembers when you said you loved him, the look in your eyes that left no room for doubt. He thought you were making a terrible decision, but he wasn’t one to complain. Your terrible decision, just lead to his great decision to go along with it.

The time passes slow, but the anxiety never comes. That isn’t who he is. Not when he’s sure about this, or at least more sure about it then whatever magic was used on you. And even if the kiss doesn’t wake you up, he’ll just find whoever cursed you in the first place and make them reap the consequences.

When he feels your hand move, slipping your fingers between his, he sighs, “About time you got up.”

“Lars? My hand—”

“Don’t get used to it.” You laugh, the sound scratchy from sleep, and he feels his body relax. It was nice to have you back.

???:

They know your souls are too entwined to have a doubt. That doesn’t not mean there won’t be blood on their hands for what was done to you. How dare someone curse the one they love. How dare someone put their hands on you.

They’re kiss is so painfully soft despite the violent rage in their chest. It’s been so long since they’ve felt this burning under their skin. Did the Curse Giver think you were alone and unloved? Did they not realize you had someone who was entwined with you in every way, down to the way you take a breath.

The wraiths flicker around them, agitated by the tremble in their body. They keep close to you, body curved as a way to shield you from the rest of the earth. If you don’t wake soon, they’re hands will find a blade, and that blade will find a body. The wraiths whisper amongst each other, as though capable of soothing them.

“But you were cursed even before this, weren’t you?” They breathe, pressing another kiss to your forehead. You shift beneath them, and when they pull away you open your eyes.

You say their name, and the sound of it wraps around them. They have a Curse Giver to kill, but for now, they only lay down beside you, and ask if you’re ok. You’ve been asleep for so long, and it took too long to get to you. They’ll never be late again.

#em answers #ch: rook #ch: beck #ch: rhea #ch: zoe #ch: lars #ch: ???#true loves kiss in the world of fairytales? more likely then you think #also got to write angry ??? for the first time let's goooo

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toniyx · 2 months

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More Vox headcanons, because I'm absolutely suffering.

Vox x Reader Migraines Headcanons (Fluff)

So, I'm pretty sure I've already seen someone do this. But now I'm going to put my own take out there, being that I have a migraine right now.

This goes under the assumption that you and him are in a (relatively) stable relationship. Nothing crazy, but you aren't absurdly toxic and fighting all the time.

- It starts when, one day, you two are alone in his big office thing. Vox isn't aware of your migraines at this point; either you haven't told him to spare his feelings, or they just haven't come up yet. Regardless...

- You enter his room, bringing him his morning coffee. Now, his big evil lair is normally pleasantly dim to you, but now, it feels like every single LED is blinking at you for attention, or, more accurately, screaming in your face.

- You approach Vox with the intent to speak with him, but every step is really heavy, and you feel dizzy. Vox hears you enter, but turns back to look at you only when you've come closer.

- The moment he looks at you, you wince. His screen is so painfully bright, and it doesn't help when he starts talking.

- The two of you talk, and you're happy, despite the pain. Vox notices that something's up, but he doesn't comment until you hand him his mug and start clutching your head, trying to cover your eyes or look away subtly. He shuts up for a moment, squinting.

- "What's the matter, dear?" he asks - he sounds more confused than he does concerned, or perhaps a little upset. Has he done something wrong? Why aren't you looking at him? You've never done this before, and for some reason, it looks to him like you're in actual, physical pain from looking at him. That's gonna hurt his ego.

- But little does he know, that's the truth. You turn back a little and begin explaining it to him, looking rather guilty for not having explained it already.

- Vox is just a little offended that you thought he'd be upset if you told him, but figures that goes against his point, and doesn't tell you.

- Now, Vox is very work-oriented, not to mention very busy—he's going to have to get back to work soon enough, there's no doubt about that. But that doesn't mean he doesn't care.

- He turns you away, thanking you dismissively for bringing him his coffee.

- Later on though, in secret, he spares a little while to shower the internet for information on these—he'd never dealt with them personally, even while alive, and he didn't care enough about anyone else to have bothered looking them up before. But now, at last, he had a reason to look into them.

- He calls up a few doctors, pulls a few strings, and threatens a couple of employees to get to work, producing whatever they possibly can to help with your problem

- He surprises you with it all later in the day, once he gets off work. He brings you just about every possible remedy he's been able to find—medicine, earmuffs, caffeine, ice packs, even a blindfold!

- You're surprised by all of this effort—Vox doesn't seem like the type, does he? If you bring it up to him, he just plays it off coyly, telling you how he couldn't possibly just let his darling suffer like that. On the outside, he sounds like a smug bastard. On the inside, though, there's some truth to what he's saying.

- Eventually, the two of you end up hanging out. Vox would even go through the trouble of dimming his screen for you; in fact, he'd even shut it off entirely, just for you. He can still see you just fine due to the cameras inbuilt into his monitor; it's much preferable to having your pretty face look away from him in pain.

- You sleep peacefully that night next to Vox. He even massages your temples without asking. Vox isn't normally so smooth, but he finds success in it just thus once.

#hazbin hotel vox #vox #fully sfw #sfw #hazbin hotel #headcanons #imagines #anyways I'm going back to sleep #this hurts #gn #vox x reader #x reader #hazbin hotel x reader

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caterkinnie · 2 years

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Hi! Can I ask for a request similar to this but instead the reader thinks the characters are just joking? I deal with a lot of relationship insecurity, especially when it comes to confessions, so like maybe a little angst with a fluffy ending.

With the characters Vil, Rook, Lilia, Riddle, Leona if that's alright (plus anyone else you want to add! I also don't mind if you want to remove one of them, or if you don't want to accept the request! Have a good day 🖤)

Please just accept their feelings they're so down bad...

❥ ⌗ characters: Vil Schoenheit, Rook Hunt, Lilia Vanrouge.

❥ ⌗ summary: They finally confess after pining for quite a while and you think they're joking

❥ ⌗ tags: somewhat angst with a happy ending, some general headcanons here and there, reader has insecurities that are not specified. not proofread.

❥ ⌗ a/n: apologies for taking so long and congrats ! you're the only one who was saved from me clearing my askbox because i really liked this request. sorry that i didn't write for leona and riddle, i already had vil, rook and lilia's parts planned beforehand</3

'...Vil, it's not funny. Why would you joke about something like that?'

Vil was completely smitten for you, and to have someone like HIM with insanely high standards for EVERYTHING down bad then that says a lot about you as a person.

It didn't take him too long to notice how you lacked confidence — normally, he wouldn't care. But we are talking about you, so he constantly tries to help you in a very Vil way.

He was very meticulous when it was about you, Vil has been planning his confession for quite a while now. As you know, he's quite the perfectionist kind of guy; Vil has every single thing planned to the smallest detail.

It's a fool-proof plan, of course after weeks and weeks trying to pursue you romantically he HAS to make it all worth it.

Of course there's a problem he wasn't considering; Vil knows you like him back, he figured it out rather quickly. However, that was not the problem — he was missing a detail.

He had planned out EVERYTHING and with that I Mean EVERYTHING, even what he would say if you rejected him (Vil thought that maybe even if you reciprocate his feelings you might not feel comfortable with him being a celebrity, something he wouldn't be mad at you for.) but your actual answer to his confession left him speechless.

I think both of you have quite a misunderstanding here.

Did he misinterpret your entire relationship? He's now overthinking. Vil was so sure that you liked him back. Did he completely mess up?

'My dear, I'm not… I'm not joking. Why would you even assume that I would make such a distasteful joke like that in the first place?'

'You… You can't be serious, right? Why would you… like me back…'

It's insanely hard to catch Rook's attention, contrary to what most people might think.

He's the self-proclaimed hunter of love, someone who's constantly seeking beauty to admire and love. Yet… that's the same reason why he feels as if he can't experience romantic love.

He's had a few crushes here and there, but nobody fully catches his eyes — nobody, until you appeared.

Rook fully believes you're the most beautiful person he's ever seen… Not only physically. Every single part about you feels so foreign to him that Rook just wants to know more and more!...

But you don't seem to acknowledge how beautiful you are, that's ok! He'll tell you all the time how wonderful you are, no matter how much you struggle to believe him, his words are nothing but pure honesty. Just thinking about you makes his heart weak, always lowering his guard as if your presence alone was able to protect him from any danger, just what are you doing to him?

Rook loves the chase, so when he gets impatient and decides it's time to confess then that means he's completely serious about this.

He's not meticulous as Vil is when planning a confession — after all, he wants it to be natural. That doesn't mean he isn't saving a few hundreds of poems about his undying love for you.

It isn't hard for him to express his love for you, since he seems to be thinking about his emotions for such a huge amount of time he's struggling to focus!

Rook was waiting for the perfect moment to confess, a moment so intimate between the two of you that felt right. Like Vil, he was quite confident and knew that you liked him back beforehand.

However, he has also noticed that you sometimes reject his compliments, something that leaves him worried all the time. He seems to be slightly stressed on a daily basis because of this, even Vil noticed his sudden change.

When he hears your response, you can see the way his usual smile falters for a second — it's almost unnoticeable. It's not unexpected, but oh, how he wished to hug you tightly and tell you how wrong you were about yourself.

Ah, how he desires you to think of yourself as highly as he does, he tries his best to hide how upset he is — not with you, but whoever made you feel as if you couldn't trust his words.

'Why wouldn't I like you..? Ah, dear Trickster, there's nothing about you I could ever dislike!'

'Ah… you're not serious, right? I don't like it when you flirt with me as a joke…'

You're right in a way, Lilia enjoys flirting for fun. Asking someone on a date just to see their reaction and maybe get to know them better. His feelings are somewhat fleeting.

He used to flirt with you because he liked your reactions, something about you always felt so refreshing… Is it perhaps the fact that you view his world in an entirely different way? Maybe you're just a normal human who just happens to be attractive to him. Either way, being with you felt different.

And it was confusing for him, Lilia knows his position as an old fae and A Single Father, which makes things complicated, let alone the fact that you two are from entirely different species (which was never a problem to begin with, however, it might inconvenience you in the future if your relationship lasted long enough)

He has been in love a few times before in his life, he's been afraid of being in love too; but that gave him a fair amount of regrets, regrets that he's not willing to either let go of or repeat.

He decided to court you as soon as possible, but his advances are somewhat… odd, expected from a man like Lilia. You usually didn't even realize what he was trying to do and if you did, you played it off as if it was a joke. Silver had to deal with his father whining about you being 'too oblivious to realize his clear and totally obvious advances' way too many times, poor guy.

Deep down… He knew it was something else, Lilia acted as if it was just you… being oblivious, nothing more. However, he's pretty good at reading people— the old fae had a very clear idea of what was going on. Which is why when he decided to stop playing around and officially ask you out, your response did not surprise him in the slightest.

'Ah, my dear.. You wound my heart. I've been trying to let you know of my feelings in a subtle manner, but you always played it off as a mere jest. What can I do to earn your trust?'

Reblogs are appreciated!

#twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland imagines #twst #disney twst #twst headcanons #vil schoenheit #vil schoenheit x reader #rook hunt #rook hunt x reader #lilia vanrouge #lilia vanrouge x reader

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spicyvampire · 3 months

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Okay so after the whole Sakuna/Wansarut and Phaya/Tharn "characters description" fighter (protector)/healer+protector(mediator) post, now imma talk about about our resident Snake (PhD), Doctor Chalothorn being a fighter and well how do you convince a fighter to not fight?

I've already made a whole gifset about this but I needed to put the stuff into words cuz u just can't say everything in a gifset so this post is gonna be about a few things, first of all, the way Charlothorn's goals shifted in the last 2 episodes, from wanting to kill Phaya so he can have Tharn, to wanting to save Tharn and Phaya's end not really mattering anymore, and second of all Tharn's role in this shift and where have we saw something similar to this shift before aka Wansarut and Sakuna and how Wansarut even did that

Same disclaimer as the last one applies : pulling this out of my ass from watching the show, these are raw out-of-order thoughts, ill try my best to separate but like the last post because I'm going to have to go back and forth between Wansarut (love of my life, talking about Wansarut has to be my favorite activity rn), Sakuna, Tharn (smooching him smooching him), Phaya and Chalothorn this might get hard to follow but hey that's what it's like inside my brain so welcome to the mess

Putting it under keep reading

So like I said in the last post, Chalothorn is a fighter, like you can't get more fighter than this, the man is literally the prince/ruler of Nagas and he is right in the middle of the battle field anytime there is a fight to be had, and like I said in Sakuna's part of the post he is a level that can probably can only be rivaled by Sakuna's brother, you can't be a higher level of Naga fighter from what I understand, so like how do you fight this man if you are Wansarut and Sakuna? (ep. 8)

Keep in mind that : the answer is that they never were supposed to fight Chalothorn

SCENARIO 1 : Chalothorn wins

This is what we've seen in the show, Sakuna/Wansarut/Phaya/Tharn would never win against him in a fight because they just aren't strong enough to began with, Sakuna and his Garuda were not Chalothorn's level when he was alive, Wansarut is a healer/protector not a fighter, Phaya can only do ✨Sparkles✨ of Garuda powers as of rn and while Tharn can do some powerful protecting he is of the gang the person who is the less in contact with his past and magical self (other than for protecting Phaya magic, we have not even seen his Naga in this lifetime) and also his past self wasn't even a fighter, so it makes sense that Chalothorn just keep killing them and every single one of their reincarnations, he kills them so much that it was destroying his own soul (ep. 8) because surprise he is getting affected by the little cyclic karma thingy they got going on too, this isn't just about Wansarut/Sakuna and PhayaTharn, Chalothorn is trapped in this shit too

Clearly fighting is not the answer, because even if you win, which Chalothorn has been doing a lot of, you still lose, Chalothorn is losing control of his Naga form, not only does it destroy his soul (ep. 8) but he might just not be able to turn into his human form anymore aka would be forced to be a Naga forever (ep. 9)

Another lost of this is that he keeps losing Wansarut and having to wait for the cycle to start again so he would get another chance, like the level of psychological damage getting done to him because he kills the one he loves and he is always left behind alone to wait is enough to drive anybody insane (ep. 11)

And I think that's one of the reasons why it took him so long to understand that he should let Wansarut/Tharn go, because when you do something so despicable and keep doing it over and over again you have to justifies your bad actions to yourself so you don't break and the more you justifies them the harder it becomes to see clearly through them, so you just keep doing it, like Chalothorn probably hates himself more than he even hates Phaya or love Tharn at this point because he keeps killing reincarnations of Wansarut, like this is his reaction to killing Wansarut the first time, falling to his knees screaming and everything (ep. 8), the cognitive dissonance in that man's brain must be insane

SCENARIO 2 : Phaya wins

Now let's imagine for a second there that they did win, Phaya succeeded in killing Charlothorn, and then what? Isn't Charlothorn just gonna reincarnate and come back for them again? Like yes it might take some times but it will happen, and then Phaya and Tharn would be the one destroying their souls and making their karma worst, that's just not a solution

Also we saw with Narong's case part of the show that "victim turned attacker" is not the answer (anyways that's what the show says), when Tharn and Phaya are talking to the abbot at the end of episode 5 the abbot keep repeating that over and over again killing is not the answer

When Phaya Says "Those victims are left with no choice but to fight back in order to survive. They have to kill." The abbot answers "The basic code of moral conducts for human beings like us is the 5 precepts. One should be abstained from killing other living beings. These precepts can bring peace and happiness to your family and the society. Undertaking the 5 precepts will benefit not only yourself but also the people around you." Basically straight up telling them that [not killing] is the only answer that will bring peace to everyone

Also so many parallels can be made between Narong and Chalothorn (which is probably why it was easy for Chalothorn to possess Narong to attack Phaya but let's not get into that), because like isn't this Chalothorn? (ep. 5)

His mind is so clouded by anger and wanting to kill Phaya and getting Tharn that he is obsessed with it, he literally do not see anything else, specially if Phaya is in the room and/or mentioned, like I said a bit higher in this post, he hates Phaya, but he probably hates himself too, and so much hate and anger just blinds people

Also sidenote that I'm not really gonna dive into : How do you think Tharn would feel about Phaya killing Chalothorn, knowing what u know about him? like Tharn loves Chalothorn as a friend, and that's even if Chalothorn is responsible for all the bad things in his life (ep. 12)

Tharn may be looking at Chalothorn saying this but he said "Please stop killing each other." he could not be more clearly talking to both of them, he doesn't want Chalothorn to kill Phaya but he also doesn't want Phaya to kill Chalothorn

SCENARIO 3 : Tharn Wins

Now lemme say this, you can literally never convince a fighter by fighting him, like if you've ever had a fight/argument with someone you know that you cannot reach a compromise in the heat of the fight when everyone is angry and losing the control of their emotions, it just doesn't work, but what does work in the context of the show?

Wansarut and Sakuna

And now I'm back to Wansarut (<3<3<3<3<3<3) and Sakuna because well Wansarut did change a fighter's mind before already, this is part of Wansarut's power that's why I also describe Wansarut as a mediator, and what did Wansarut do exactly?

Well Wansarut healed Sakuna, even if he is from the enemy side, and took care of him and acted in a way that was protective of him, even if again Sakuna is an enemy of Wansarut's people (literally brother of the Garuda king) because that Wansarut's character, Wansarut is a healer/a protect/a mediator that's how Wansarut fights (ep. 8)

Then Wansarut tough Sakuna about Naga culture (Naga offering and breathing fire to pay respect to Buddha, on the 15th nigh of the 11th waxing moon)

And while being in love with each other did facilitate this change of view in Sakuna (which would later turn him a bit into a protector of Wansarut), you really do not need to be for this to work, like the best way to change people views on some things truly is just to expose them to the thing from the POV of the people living it, when nobody is in any immediate danger

And that is exactly how Tharn succeeded in convincing Chalothorn that the love between Phaya and him is good, by being there for Chalothorn and taking care of him, and being patient, until Chalothorn was ready to let him go on his own, not in the heat of of fight when everyone is angry and putting the blame on each other, which was again so healer/ protector/mediator of him like I talked about in my other post

Tharn and Chalothorn : the final

So with Wansarut and Sakuna we saw how Tharn could change Chalothorn's mind and what really does work, now imma dive into the last 2 episodes of this show aka the shift in Chalothorn

So in episode 6, Chalothorn says this

And at that time I think those words were true cuz that's literally what he has been doing isn't it? Like everytime he lost, both Wansarut and Sakuna's reincarnations died, so he was "okay" with killing Wansarut, as long as it meant that Sakuna was also dead and they weren't together (crazy way to fight cognitive dissonance if you ask me) but then something changed around episode 11 because Chalothorn started saving Tharn even if Phaya was still alive? (Ep. 11) (ep.12)

The importance of Chalothorn saving Tharn those 2 times, is that 1) now Tharn knows what the fuck is going on and 2) (like I said in the other post) Tharn end up understanding that Chalothorn can be talked too and reasoned with (the abbot would call it enlightenment), because in that 2nd saving he told Chalothorn to not kill Montee, and Chalothorn listened

Sidenote : Wansarut also did tell Chalothorn to not kill Sakuna and Chalothorn did listen that time too, like Wansarut has a BIG influence on this man (wish we saw their relationship before the mess), the only reason why the fight did continue was because Sakuna did not let Wansarut go

Why did he listen then? because he loves Wansarut, it really is as simple as that, and that's why he also listened to Tharn with Montee, because our chronically involuntary celibate man is head over dick for Tharn (valid and relatable)

So remember when I was talking about cognitive dissonance and stuff, well by ep 12, Chalothorn cannot justifies killing Tharn anymore, he is tired, he is turning into a Naga, and he cannot stand seeing another reincarnation of Wansarut die again, but most importantly he cannot stand to see Tharn die by his own hands

It's easy to concentrate on Phaya's distress in this scene but Chalothorn is in as much distress as Phaya, you can hear Chalothorn's voice break when Tharn is dying in both Phaya and his arms after asking them to stop killing each other, they are both screaming Tharn's name, and this time Chalothorn just listen because this is too much, his hatred for Phaya is just not important anymore, killing Phaya is just not as important anymore because anyways Tharn did choose him didn't he? isn't that what he wanted? even if Tharn clearly is in love with Phaya, Tharn did choose to come with him, so in a way none of this shit even fucking matters anymore

So for the 3rd time, he saves Tharn, this time by literally giving Tharn his soul so he would live (wish we saw him breaking down over Tharn dying in his arms in the Naga caves until he ended up giving Tharn his soul tbh), Chalothorn chooses to save a life instead of ending one and thus ending the curse on his part

#the sign the series #the sign #mjtag #tagging you mj cuz u liked my chalothorn gifset so you might like this #hope this makes sense i kinda did not re-read after i was done writing it #my only critic of this show is that i needed them to huminaze chalothorn more #by showing me wansarut interacting with chalothorn before the whole sakuna situation #and also by showing me chalothorn crying/breaking down/panicking over Tharn dying in his arms in the Naga caves #until he decides to just give Tharn his soul #this show needed to be 14 episodes SO bad #i ended up not putting my critic in this cuz it was just too long #but what i just said in the tag is basically it my critic is that it needed to be 14 episodes #i can elaborate in an ask if asked about it #anyways this show really makes my psychology and character lover brain tingle

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gabigabigabby · 1 year

Text

pretty boy | p. foden

phil foden x de bruyne!reader

a/n: okay so i dreamt this and i woke up and was like how could i have done that to phil?!. i love this man so much 😭 enjoy! 🩵

synopsis: city win the fa cup and you hug julian a liiiiittle bit too long for your boyfriend's liking

content/warnings: very fluffy (maybe a tiny bit angsty), angsty phil, jealousy, phil and julian basically despise each other in this

—

the whistle is blown and you couldn't help but break down in the vip box with kevin's wife. man city are the fa cup winners. you and michele both knew how hard kevin and the squad had worked to get to this point. two finals and one is over, a happy ending for the club.

"go down there!" michele had pushed you to go and congratulate the guys. you ask her to tag along. "i'll be right behind you."

you nod and leave michele to deal with mason, rome and suri. you bring yourself straight to phil, whose feelings were the only thing you could think of throughout the entire game. phil came on for your brother at the 76th minute and played like the boss that he is.

as soon as you step foot onto the pitch, phil is nowhere to be seen, kevin too. they went to the bathroom, maybe, you thought. you head straight for ruben and kyle, congratulating them with big hugs.

you were grateful to be able to get to share this moment with the guys. they truly are the brothers you never had, besides kev, of course. back in belgium, you were raised to be kind, loving and warm. it explains why you are so adamant about giving every single guy in the squad a big hug. kevin was raised slightly differently, but you grew up giving him big hugs too.

you moved from player to player; manuel, john, rodri, ilkay, bernardo, jack and erling. when it came to julian, you didn't just embrace him and pull away quicker than the speed of light. you had been watching julian ever since his days at river plate, and you had been a fan since discovering him at the last copa america. you considered julian to be your best friend in the squad, besides phil and kevin.

your subconscious seems to tell you to hold on to julian a little bit longer, noticing that you find genuine comfort in his warmth. julian didn't seem to want to pull away either, so the both of you stayed that way for a few minutes.

if only you'd forced yourself to pull away from julian earlier, because you had noticed phil coming into the middle of the pitch. he had stopped in his tracks after seeing the sight of you and julian in a tight embrace.

as you pull away, phil's already treading back towards the wembley tunnel. by then, most of the guys have already made their way back to the locker room to freshen up.

"sorry j, i gotta go. congratulations again." your hands that were on his shoulders make their way to his cheeks, lightly slapping them before making a beeline for the tunnel, hoping you'd catch phil before he gets to the locker room.

you'd always get yourself lost looking for the locker rooms here at the wembley. this time, kevin was your landmark. "hey!" he blurts out after your body collides into his. "you see a ghost or something?"

"sorry. i'm looking for phil. you seen him?" your belgian accent always makes itself known everytime you get nervous. it'd been that way since you were young. kevin noticed it.

"foden? yeah, he's in there sulking," he points to the room behind him. "your belgian accent is showing. what'd you do, y/n? the man never broods like that."

you were hesitant to tell kevin, but he kept pushing you to. "i hugged julian a little bit too long."

kevin has that that explains why look on his face now. "no wonder he keeps staring at julian's locker like that!" kevin says. "please talk to the man. i have no energy and time to deal with conflict right now." he instructs, walking away as you rush into the room.

most of the guys had already began drinking, some were already in their briefs. "nothing i haven't seen before." you mutter to yourself. you scan the room, looking for phil. the boy is sitting in the corner, bent over, looking downward at the big man city crest in the middle of the room.

you rush towards phil, falling onto your knees before him. the latter wouldn't look at you. "phil, i can explain. please look at me." you beg.

"so now you suddenly like julian like that?" phil asks, monotony laced quite thick in his tone. your brows pull together in guilt and regret, hurt that he would even think that way.

"of course not," your hands find themselves on his thighs. he didn't fight it though. "he has emilia."

"exactly," phil's eyes finally find yours. "so why you huggin' him like that?" his mancunian accent is more prominent than ever.

you start to stutter, which made phil scoff and lick his lips, amused at the fact that you couldn't even find the right words to say. "baby, i was just congratulating him. i'm so proud of you guys, truly."

phil shakes his head, not fully buying whatever you're selling him. "so why didn't you come to me first? you're gonna tell me you didn't see me with kevin?"

"i didn't even see kevin in the first place. and you know i never congratulate my brother in the open like that. my ego's too damn big." you explain, dropping your hands from phil's thighs, knowing well that he knew it too.

phil tilts his head to his left. "yeah," he agrees. "the ego in you belgian people."

"mean." kevin interferes from behind you.

you and phil ignore your brother's retort as you bring your hand back up to touch his knee. "phil, i'm sorry. you should've been the first person i ran to. please don't be upset anymore. i promise you that from now on, you will be the only person i'll congratulate."

you push yourself up, kissing his left cheek, right cheek, left then right again, ending off with a gentle kiss on the tip of his nose. it was a gesture you'd learned from kevin when you were younger. "please smile."

the smile phil forced out was fake and you knew it, you just didn't want to push him. "pretty boy. love you always."

"hey, you congratulate me too, yeah?" kevin interferes once again, pointing his thumb at himself.

"shut up kev." you roll your eyes, not even bothering to turn to look at your brother.

"you promise?" phil finally speaks. you raise your brows. "you promise i'll be the first you run to after a game?"

you slowly smile. "i promise as if it's my last, philippa," you call him by your special nickname for him. "now will you please stop brooding? kev said he doesn't want to see angry cute guys in this locker room or he'll fall in love."

"i never said that, y/n!" kevin quickly fights back. "i don't think you're cute like that, phil. like, you're good-looking and all, b-but you're not my type, you know- I'M MARRIED!"

"we know, dude. calm your tits down." you scoff at his explosive tendency to keep defending himself when he knows it isn't working.

phil takes your hand away from his knee, rubbing the pad of his thumb across your knuckles. that is one of the many signs phil gives that means we're all good now. "y'all done fighting?" jack calls out to you and phil from across the room. phil's eyes and your head dart towards him.

"i'm getting chinese if you adorable kids want some." he offers, about to head out the door.

"chinese sounds good." phil shrugs.

"fine by me," you shrug. grabbing your hand, phil grabs his backpack and pulls you along behind him as you hear jack singing his chinese takeout jive. "jack, stop singing that shit."

#phil foden #phil foden x reader #phil foden x you #phil foden x y/n #football #football x reader #football x y/n #football x you #manchester city #premier league #english football

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ponderingmoonlight · 5 months

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How JJK men react to different insecurities part 1

Pairings: Nanami x reader with facial scars (reqested by @ynackerman9499) Megumi x fem! reader with small breasts (requested by anon) Sukuna x reader with acne (requested by @sanicsmut)

Word Count: 2,9k

Warnings: if you feel triggered by any of those insecurities please don't read it, I'm writing this out of an insecure pov - there's nothing wrong with having scars, acne or small breasts okay 🤍 Hope y'all enjoy 🤍

Kento Nanami - facial scars

You look at yourself in the mirror, eyes already starting to sting in tears. Why? Why did it have to end like this? You were never a pity person, never worried too much about looks. But this, this is something completely different.

“Hey darling, are you okay?”

“Yeah…”, you mumble in response, shaky hand mindlessly dropping your toothbrush into the sink.

You hate the way you look, the way those ugly scars are now a part of your face that will never fade away. Even though you are lucky you even survived, even though all that counts for you is that your precious boyfriend is still around, you’ve been avoiding looking at your own self ever since, covering yourself with makeup and masks even around him.

Him. Kento Nanami. The light of your life, the best boyfriend you could ask for. He told you over and over how much he loves you, that he couldn’t care less about a few scars decorating your face. But ever since that fateful day, you hid yourself very well from him – so well that he hasn’t seen your face ever since.

“Hey, what’s wrong?”, a gentle voice behind you mumbles.

Before you are able to react, he wraps his arms around you from behind and presses your body against his large frame. Frantically, you cover your face with your hands, your mask laying on top of the shelf on the other side of the room. Fuck, why didn’t you lock the door as usual? How could you be so careless? If he gets to see you like this, a jaw-dropping gorgeous man like Kento…

Would he still love you after seeing you like this when you aren’t even able to accept yourself?

“Please stop hiding from me, (y/n). I know the last weeks were rough, that you are insecure about the scars the fight left on your face. But please, just let me look at you without makeup or that mask, let me finally see the love of my life again. You are too precious to not be looked at.”

“I’m not”, you cough out.

Don’t cry, don’t make it more embarrassing than it already is. You have always been so strong, so independent. Crying over something ridiculous like this doesn’t suit you at all. You know yourself that it’s stupid, hiding from the love of your life because of a few scars. But every time you look into the mirror, you see nothing but a crippled version of what you used to be, a shadow of the person Kento fell in love with.

You couldn’t take it. Over and over, you imagined how he’d stare at you with disgust creeping up his face, turning away from you and never coming back. No wonder, Kento is a very attractive man after all, women hitting on him every time both of you go out. But you…One single glimpse in the mirror is enough to make you shiver, to let a single tear fall down your eye.

You are far away from being attractive by now.

“I hate seeing you like this and it truly breaks my heart that I’m not able to see your gorgeous face anymore-“

“Because it’s not”, you scream so suddenly that he flinches.

“I look nothing like the person you fell in love with years ago! I-I’m nothing but a shadow of myself, Kento! If you see me like this, you…”

You can’t put it into words, the thought alone cutting through your heart like a knife through warm butter. He’s better off without you and you know it, he’d definitely be able to pull a nice partner for himself, one that doesn’t look as worn down as yourself. But your heart simply can’t take it, just thinking about him with someone else feels like dying from inside.

You can’t lose him. Even if it’s selfish.

“(y/n).”

Gently, he positions himself in front of you and grabs your face. You want to run away, want to hide your ugly scars from his gaze. But instead, you just stare at him blankly, tears rolling down your cheeks like a waterfall by now. Is this the moment, the moment he realizes that he doesn’t want to be with you anymore?

“Just like I expected. You look as breath-taking as you did back then. These scars show nothing but how strong you are, that you are able to survive everything. Why would you ever suggest that I’d leave you because of something like this? You are my treasure, my everything, (y/n). Wouldn’t you love me if I had scars all over my face?”

“Of course I would”, you sniff immediately.

Kento smiles down at you softy, placing a kiss on every little scar on your face while you cry your eyes out.

How? How do you even deserve a caring man like him, how is he still able to look at you with nothing but affection in his eyes?

“See? Now, put away those masks and your makeup and be proud of what you did, okay? You saved the lives of our first years. Never forget how strong you are.”

“I love you more than anything else, Kento”, you mumble before pressing your face against his firm chest and getting lost in his scent.

“I love you too, darling. Maybe even more with those scars.”

Megumi Fushiguro - small breasts

You watch in sheer disinterest as a random girl from another Jujutsu sorcerer school positions herself in front of you, her cheeky grin almost eating you up alive.

“And who are you?”

“I’m (y/n) and a student here at Jujutsu High”, you remark dryly, not interested the slightest in her cheeky tone.

From the outside, she definitely looks like a dream girl. Tall but not too tall, blonde but not too blonde, doe eyes but not too innocent. And not to mention, the big pair of cherries that seems to stare right through your soul.

Even though you know that you are a decent looking girl, this one thing about your body always made you feel insecure. Every damn day of puberty, you hoped for a miracle overnight, that your breast might eventually start growing. But of course, that never happened.

Instead, you seem to be stuck with small boobs until the end of time. And while it definitely has its advantages here and there, it always makes you feel bad about yourself when you see girls like her, girls who are blessed with those natural curves.

“What kind of woman is your type?”, you suddenly hear from afar, ears perking up just the slightest.

“I don’t know.”

You swallow. That voice you know all to well, the voice of bored Megumi Fushiguro. Who is he talking to? And why on earth does your heart start racing, waiting desperately for his response?

“Are you more like an ass or a boob guy?”

“As long as they have an unshakable character, I won’t ask for more.”

“I saw the way you blinked when I said boobs.”

“There’s nothing wrong with admitting the truth”, Yuji interjects.

“Even if I do, what’s the purpose of all these stupid questions!?”

Your heart sinks. Ever since you’ve joined Jujutsu High, you always had both eyes set on that gorgeous boy. And even though it always seemed a little ridiculous, you thought he even liked you back from time to time. How stupid it was to think that a boy like him would want a girl like you, how stupid to even consider you are his type. Aren’t all boys nowadays into big boobs or big butts?

To be honest, you have neither.

“Why are you looking at me so sad now? Oh, are you jealous? Don’t worry, not everyone has the right to be blessed by mother nature. You’ll find someone who loves you the way you are, though – looking like a stick.”

Her words. Her venomous words shouldn’t hit you with full force, her words shouldn’t make tears sting in the corners of your eyes.

But oh they do.

With a swift motion, you get up from the stairs you were sitting on, running up as fast as you can to avoid curious looks. Damn, how was a bitch like her able to make you feel this miserable, why does it even bother you this much that you have a smaller chest?

Because everyone around you doesn’t have this issue. Because it seems like you’re the only one who isn’t blessed. Even Nobara and Maki have bigger boobs than you, even though Maki is well-trained. Why do you have to look this way? And why…

Why isn’t this what Megumi wants?

“Have you seen her? That looked like (y/n) running into that room”, Megumi mutters, looking after you in confusion.

Why would you run into a storage room so rapidly? You almost looked sad, as if something hurt you. He clenches his fist, not even caring about Yuji’s answer anymore. Out of all people, you are the one who shouldn’t feel bad a single moment, whoever did this to you will-“

“(y/n)”, he breathes out.

There you sit, back against the wall and your face in your hands, tears visibly running down your face. His heart almost stops. Megumi has never seen you cry, you were always the cool and composed one. What made you sit there, crying your eyes out?

“Don’t look at me”, you spit at him, turning away in an instant while hugging your knees.

Your words hit him with full force. Why did you sound so furious, did he do something wrong?

“But (y/n), I want to know what-“

“You’re not interested in my anyway, aren’t you?”

You know all too well how ridiculous and childish your words sound, but you can’t keep yourself together. All these months you roamed after him, thought you’d really stand a chance. And now…

And now Megumi Fushiguro isn’t into girls with small breasts?

“Why would you think that?”, he replies in an instant.

Instinctively, he rushes to your side, his mind racing. When did he ever give you the idea that he isn’t interested in you? Of course, he wasn’t exactly clear about it. After all, he himself was scared that you might not be interested in him and everything would turn out awkward after his confession. But did he really treat you this badly?

“Didn’t you say it yourself?”

The venomous tone of your voice makes him flinch. Even with your face puffy from all the tears and twisted in agony, you still look absolutely breath-taking. God, when did he mess up so bad? He can’t lose you like this, not when he doesn’t even know what happened-

“If you’re not attracted to girls with small breasts, I’m certainly not the one for you.”

Megumi has to blink a few times, mind trying to understand the words that just left your mouth. He, into girls with big breast? He, not into you? It doesn’t make any sense. You, the most wonderful girl walking on this earth? You with a body that makes his knees go weak in an instant? You, the girl he’s hopelessly in love with?

“What are you talking about? You are the only one I care about”, he clarifies before thinking twice.

Your heart skips a beat, eyes darting towards him in an instant. One look into his innocent orbs tells you that he isn’t just lying into your face, that he actually means what he just said. Does that mean…?

“B-but…Just a few moments ago, you said it yourself!”, you demand weakly.

“You mean my conversation with that guy from Kyoto? (y/n), I couldn’t care less about things like that. The only think that’s important for me is your character made of pure gold, okay? And also, I love your body the way it is. You look absolutely stunning. And your breast do too.”

In an instant, your cheeks turn bright red. Oh god, did he really just say that? Megumi wants to punch himself for his unfiltered words, for the fact that he clearly made you uncomfortable. Is there a way out of this misery?

“I-I mean…I think they look really good. You look really good. You don’t need big breasts for that. And I imagine small breast have their-“

“Please”, you interrupt him.

“I get it, but can we please stop talking about my boobs like that?”

Ryomen Sukuna - acne

“A pretty bad position you put yourself him, huh?”, the king of curses in front of you sneers.

Your hands fight desperately against the invisible chains, eyes searching for the tiniest possibility of a way out. But it’s impossible. After all, you aren’t held hostage by anyone. No, the man who’s sitting in front of you with his head resting in his hand is none other than Sukuna himself.

“Rather a position you put me in, idiot”, you bite back.

He chuckles unpromising, hand grabbing your chin before you’re even able to fight back. His eyes let your blood freeze in your veins, heart pumping so loudly that you bet he can hear it from afar.

“I don’t need to remind you that you’re here because you’re fighting for the wrong side, right?”

“The wrong side? Whose side is right, then?”

“Mine, of course.”

You snort disdainfully, yanking your chin out of his firm grasp. This guy has some nerves, talking down at you when you were out there enjoying yourself.

“I bet you’d fit well right by my side. You’re strong, you’re hot-“

“Don’t call me hot”, you interrupt immediately.

Out of instinct, you turn your face away from him. The face that makes you feel uncomfortable every time someone looks at it, the face that is responsible for multiple dumb comments you received when you were still at school. You know it’s a quite common thing. Many people fight against acne, some worse than you. But god, how much you hate to look at yourself, to see a new red spot on your face each and every day. No one at Jujutsu High ever pointed it out or looked at you in disgust. Yes, the times were people picked on you because of your acne are long gone.

But oh, their comments still haunt you, they still make you believe that you will never be able to be fully beautiful with those things covering your damn face.

“Why wouldn’t I?”

May the ground swallow you whole and get you out of this uncomfortable position. Why on earth does it have to be Sukuna who gets curious about you rejecting his compliment? Why can’t Yuji just regain the control over his body and put an end to your suffering?

“Because it’s a lie”, you press out.

Again, Sukuna gets a hold of your chin, his face now so near that you aren’t able to escape his stinging gaze anymore.

“Why are you saying that, brat?”

“Are you blind or something?”, you bark at him.

It feels like back then when your classmates used to pick on you. But this time, it isn’t a dumb kid that just wants to make fun of you. No, this time it’s actually the king of curses who toys with your insecurity, the only sore point you have about yourself.

“You may be. Because I don’t get why you’re talking down yourself like that.”

“Don’t you see that stuff covering my whole face?”

You can’t take it anymore, his intense staring paired with your own embarrassment. Within the last months, you really thought you got over the fact that your acne won’t go away that fast, that you’ll have to fight for it to disappear. And since no one ever mentioned it at Jujutsu High, you began to tolerate the red marks covering your skin. But at this moment, your sensitive confidence seems to shatter.

“And what about it? I don’t get what you’re talking about, brat”, Sukuna remarks dryly.

You blink a few times. The bored expression on his face tells you more than clearly that he isn’t making fun of you at all. Is it really possible that Ryomen Sukuna meant what he said, that he isn’t bothered about your face?

“I have acne all over my face”, you breathe out.

He rolls his eyes and shrugs his shoulders, hand moving your chin right and left.

“I don’t give zero fucks about that.”

It’s a simple answer, an answer spat in your face with disinterest. But oh does it make sparks fly around you and your heart almost beat out of your chest. The king of curses doesn’t care about acne.

The fucking king of curses called you hot despite your face is covered in red spots.

“I don’t know why anyone would care about shit like that. You’re strong and you’re hot, what about those spots?”, he continues while rolling his eyes.

“You really mean it”, you mutter more to yourself than him, a smile creeping up your face.

You feel like a little girl, the urge to giggle and jump up and down almost becoming unbearable. He really finds you hot. He really saw your face and lost not a single thought about your acne.

And he’s the king of curses.

“Why are you looking at me like that, brat? Did you forget that I kidnapped you?”

“Oh, you can kidnap me anytime”, you answer almost euphoric.

Sukuna tilts his head, eyes scanning you up and down.

“Humans really are strange.”

Tags: @arehzhera @ploylulla @tzubaki @beatrexworld @kenstarsworld @dazaisdick @hellkaiserinphoenix @lauv4chuuya @shadowfoxey @starlightanyaaa @sindela @kayleegomez @sunshine7queen @magalimachete @mokoartpost @gatitam @idontknow1123 @creative1writings @sanicsmut @mynahx3 @sad-darksoul @chilichopsticks @hellkaiserinphoenix @chuyasthighs0 @ynackerman9499 @keepghostly @wxwieeee @lovelyluna1 @froufrousnowman @hidazinie @tomiokathedepresso @gojosrealwife @coffeeluvr96 @mahi-tamashi @weebotaku21 @chaoticwinnercupcake @lees-chaotic-brain @risuola @sugurulefttesticle @wordskeeper @baku2345 @polarbvnny @ruixrei @bam-bam-bam-bame-blog @lavenderdrxp @localhehecat @alicerhr @kayleegomez

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bugsmunched · 5 months

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💔And I'm so sorry that I failed you || Peter parker X DEAD ! GN! Reader

Summary: Peter visits Y/N's gravesite and tells them everything that they've missed since they've been gone.

Contents: dead reader, mentions of death, Peter couldn't save reader, hurt/no comfort, angst

Word Count: 1.1 k

--------------------

It was a perfectly gloomy day, clouds looming over New York City, the occasional drizzle falling down onto the people of the bustling city. Peter sighed, head pressed against the glass of the car window, flowers clutched in his hands resting in his lap. They were Y/n's favorite flowers, and he took them every time he visited them. Most of his visits were short, as he couldn't bring himself to stay there for more than a few minutes at a time, but today was different. Today was the one-year anniversary of their death, and Peter thought that deserved to know everything that they had missed since being gone.

He blamed himself for their death. It had been during the fight with Harry Osborn, they had fallen off the clock tower and he tried to save them, but they were falling too fast and their spine and neck snapped as they were caught by the web. There was no way he could've saved them, but he always blamed himself for their death. The truth was, he was in love with them, but he never got the chance to say it, they died before he was brave enough to say three simple words. He hated himself for being such a coward.

He was broken out of his thoughts as May placed a hand on his shoulder, "We're here, sweetheart. Remember, we'll stay as long as you need to, okay?" she said softly, rubbing his shoulder as he sat up straight, hands shaking a little bit. "Want me to stay in here so you can talk to them in private?"

"Please." Peter said softly, looking at his aunt with a broken smile. He opened the car door and stepped out, the cold air hitting his face. He started to walk over to their grave, hands shaking more as he felt his heart rate accelerate. He could feel tears forming already in his eyes, just at the idea of seeing their grave. He had never made it more than three minutes without bursting into tears, and today every single emotion of his was heightened.

He finally arrived at their grave and sighed, leaning down and placing the flowers on their tombstone. "Hey, Y/n, how've you been?" he asked, a broken smile forming on his face. "I know, it's been a few weeks since we've seen each other, I've been busy, doing Spider-Man stuff...saving the city. " His words were shaky and his breathing was uneven. " I've also been avoiding you, I know, how cruel of me. " he said with a broken laugh.

"It just hurts to not hear your voice anymore, to not be able to see your smile or hold you in my arms. I've managed to last a whole year so far, but god, it's been so hard." He said as tears fell free, streaming down his face. "Look at me, I'm already crying like a baby." he attempted to joke, wiping his tears away with his sleeve. "Must be record timing. Haven't even been here a minute." He said softly, sniffling and trying to stifle his sobs.

"Anyway, I know i don't normally stay here that long, but since it's been a year, I thought you should know everything that you've missed since you...passed. " he muttered, reaching into his coat pocket and pulling out a list.

"May is going to nursing school again, she's passing all of her classes. I'm so proud of her for pursuing her dreams. She's close to graduating." He said, a tear falling down onto the paper and smudging some of the words.

"Gwen got into Oxford, she's been doing really good there. She's gonna come and visit you sometime soon, a special trip just to see you. Isn't that great?" He asked, wiping his tears and snot from his face once again.

"I still haven't picked out a college yet- I know, how stupid of me. I have so much potential and I shouldn't waste it. it's just hard to think about leaving you behind. " He choked out, the paper in his hands quivering because his hands were shaking so badly.

"That deli you really liked- it has a sandwich named after you, it's your favorite sandwich to order from that place. Mr. Wayne told me to tell you that he misses your smile, and your tips. " He said with a broken laugh. "He thought you'd laugh at that. "

" I tried getting a tattoo in your honor, found out that my skin heals too fast to get one. It was gone in a few days, unfortunately. So I just wear a necklace with your picture instead. It's cheesy, you'd hate it. " He smiled softly, biting back more sobs. He folded the paper back up, stuffing it into his pocket as the trickle of tears turned into a downpour, sobs escaping his mouth.

"I miss you. Every day I miss you. Every day I look in the mirror and ask, 'why couldn't I save them?' Every day I regret telling you that I'm Spider-Man. Every single damn day I regret becoming Spider-Man. The mask is a painful reminder that no matter how many people I save, I can never make up for who I lost. But I can't stop saving people. It's just not in my nature." He muttered out, falling down to his knees in front of the grave.

" But I would give it all away, just to be able to see you one last time, to be able to hold you in my arms and feel you against me, one last time. To be able to crack a joke and hear you laugh and see you smile one last time. To be able to hear your voice, one last time. I would give up everything I have to be able to see you again. To be able to say a proper good-bye. " he sobbed out, just letting it all out.

"I don't deserve to wear the mask. I'm just a coward hiding under the guise of someone strong. Hiding beneath the powers, but they don't make me brave. I couldn't even tell you three simple words. I couldn't tell you how I felt about you. " He closed his eyes tightly, feeling small drops of rain begin to fall from the sky onto his hands and face.

"Every day I'm plagued by words I couldn't say. But I think it's finally time I say them. Y/n L/n, I love you. I always have, and I'm so sorry that I failed you."

#tasm peter x reader #dead reader #angst #peter parker angst #peter parker x reader #andrew garfield #spiderman

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hyperactivewhore · 10 months

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If you're a Damon or Katherine fan, I really don't recommend you read this. But if you dislike them as much as me, go ahead.

I was (stupidly) one of the few people that chose to think Damon didn't rape Caroline, because Pl*c said he didn't. And like, I prefer to believe that, not because I like Damon, I despise him, but because the amount of sexual abuse this show has is disgusting.

Tyler trying to rape Vicky, Damon raping Caroline, Katherine raping Stefan, etc. And damn, perhaps even when Klaus made out with Caroline while he was in Tyler's body.

Do I think he would have slept with her? No, but the fact that Caroline had already took her shirt off and Klaus didn't stop her until later always felt off for me. I don't think he would have raped her, at all. I don't see any of the Mikaelson as the rape type, perhaps Mikael, but not even then.

But anyways, while scrolling through Google, I decided to search how Julie actually "confirmed" Damon didn't rape Caroline, and honestly it's just pathetic.

What does this even mean? Caroline herself said he abused her, AND fed on her. I mean, the quote is literally "I remember how you manipulated me. You pushed me around, abused me, erased my memories. Fed on me."

Yes, Caroline consented to sex the first time, but after that? He fed on her, and raped her as well.

And Katherine raped Stefan as well, I'm pretty sure. When she began compelling him, to "go on exactly like they wanted", he literally wasn't mentally able to consent to a romantic relationship with her, less alone sexual. And Stefan was 17, exactly the same age Caroline was when Damon raped her.

So, if I'm correct, Katherine raped Stefan, Damon raped Caroline and Andy, Tyler tried to force himself on Vicky and I think it's implied Stefan is a rapist as well in a flashback, but I'm not too sure because the last time I saw TVD (other than seasons 3/4) was in 2018, right when it ended, but the whole thing is him being seen with naked women and blood all over them while he had his humanity off I think. Anyway, disgusting.

I don't think the writers intented for them to be considered rapists, especially if we take into account the three of them are fan favorite. But it was 2009, a lot of things were taken lightly and I'm 100% sure TVD wouldn't have made it past the pilot if it had been streamed in 2020.

And yeah, every single character is a murderer on this show, but there's a difference between them. Both are traumatic and both are unforgiving, and in real life no one wants to be through that (I've seen people compare Elena and Caroline's trauma, her being raped and the first being abused by Klaus, which it's disgusting, there is no need to compare them). But if you're gonna bring one of them to fiction, always chose murder. Because in murder there may be a "redeeming" quality that explains why you did it, but rape? It's completely disgusting, it's awful and there is nothing that will ever excuse taking someone's free will like that.

But anyways: The Vampire Diaries is racist, rapist and a lot of things I'm for sure forgetting now. It's really hard to be a fan of this show sometimes, but I still like it, though I'm more of a fan of The Originals. And that show has problems of it's own, considering it made Elijah look racist and made Klaus sympathize with a group of vampires that the show recognized as nazis.

#anti damon salvatore #anti katherine pierce #klaus mikaelson #stefan salvatore #tyler lockwood #elena gilbert #elijah mikaelson #the originals #the vampire diaries #tvd #to #candice king #joseph morgan #ian somerhalder #paul wesley #nina dobrev #I posted this a while back but ended up deleting it accidentally #I had it in notes though 🤭

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hecksilver · 5 months

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What If: Jordan got rejected?

hello, i'm here once more, late at night with another story, yay :) i hope you guys enjoy, i'm using this to get a grip with my writing so feedbacks are welcome. also i'm open to requests & asks!

word count: 2.422

It all started with Forensics.

The one class, other than Brink’s, that every single student in Crimefighting major wanted to attend.

Ministered by professor Clancy, it was focused on preparing students for a career in – as the major’s name itself already implied - crime fighting by means that when beyond just the use of brute force.

The studies spanned the fields of hero anthropology, superheroes bio-chemistry; biology of super abled bodies, chemistry of brains and bodies under the influence of Compound V, physics and psychology specialized in superheroes and sociology of a society with super powered people. It was a quite extensive coursework, it required perfect grades, above 75% class attendance percentage independent of the major (but let’s be real no one in fucking Performing Arts were trying to get into Forensics), GPA of 3.7 or above – professor Clancy was ridiculously strict about who’s taking her class –, and a previous knowledge of the basics of lifesaving techniques (which, curiously, wasn’t include in God U’s curriculum).

Anyone who managed to get a chair during this class was considered to be blessed. Those who were accepted in the course had with certainty guaranteed, at the very least, a B-rank city contract. Also, the sponsors really enjoyed pumping up the academics, it made them look good – no one wanted to be at the mercy of a hero that didn’t knew how to do fucking CPR.

And Jordan has been killing themselves for one of the very, very few vacant chairs.

Technically Clancy’s class was already at full by the standards of elective programs of God U, having filled all the 10 slots in three days – but, it seems that, professor Clancy had a new TA, who Jordan had heard off more than seen, who’ve convinced the woman to open more two positions.

And so a bunch of sophomores, juniors and seniors (and some stupid freshmen who really thought they could stand a chance) started to go fucking berserk on each other. From sabotaging each other’s applications forms to actually starting brawls in the middle of the halls, and even getting some people badly hurt just to show-off how well they could perform lifesaving.

It was fucking chaos, because of course it was.

Jordan wasn’t partaking in any of the violence and dirty mess, nah! Their act was all about subtly. They kept tabs on anyone who had already taken, or tried to take, Forensics with Clancy; making small talk, flirting, even fucking some hot piece of ass (this part wasn’t all that difficult), just so they’d know when the Intro to Forensics would be open – and they all said the same thing,

“Well, Clancy usually opens the application forms on the second week of the month, but her new TA’s the one making the calls now, so I don’t know…Anyway, can I get your number?”

And, fuck, that made everything ten times harder because Jordan had no damn clue who was Clancy’s TA. They heard her name, Maggie (or Molly, or Mary) something-something, or anything like that – they were pretty sure it had an ‘M’ in it, maybe two. But they didn’t catch her face anywhere so it was practically impossible to know, they looked for anyone with a similar name so they could sweet talk into giving him one of the two spots; but, it appears that, Clancy’s new TA was fucking Amish or some shit.

As far as they could guess at this point, this TA didn’t have a goddamn phone, or just couldn’t be social for shit.

Maybe their account was priv. But that would be simply really dumb considering one of the main points of God U’s was gaining social traction and nothing was better than Instagram and Tik Tok for that.

The running around was starting to piss them off. And it got worse when they found out, at their stop by Vought-a-Burger before their next class, that Luke had manage to get one of the vacant spots. His friend at least had the sense of looking sheepish when he broke the news – Brink had get him the spot, as a highly scouted hero and future prospect to the Seven, it was of high importance that Luke took all the classes that could help him get a better leverage until his departure to The Tower (also, it looked good on social media and in the interviews they get him to do).

So now there was only one spot.

Jordan was happy for their friend, they really were. But holy fuck! How unfair was that? And it seemed to be usual to this point. Since Brink had taken Jordan under his wing, making them his TA in their freshman year, helping them with sponsorships and brand deals and marketability, being more of a father figure to Jordan than their own dad, seeing the value in their powers, in their capability to learn, to thrive, to be the best of the best – however, since professor Brink had showed that he believed, truly believed, in Jordan one thing was always pretty clear, cut-and-dry: Jordan was the apple to Brink’s eyes…After Luke.

If Jordan was a shining star, Luke was the motherfucking sun. Untouchable, unreachable. Jordan would always the God U’s top 3, but they would also always be number 2.

And that fucking hurt. Why Brink didn’t help them? Why, didn’t Brink talked to Clancy’s about Jordan as well? If he valued them so much, why Luke always came first, why couldn’t the game be even?

Jordan manage to smile, nonetheless, and throw out a petty joke about how Luke was only there so people think he actually new CPR and he wouldn’t make a fool of himself in public – they laughed and that was it.

For the rest of the week Jordan worked hard. They didn’t took breaks, studied their ass off, was the first to came into Brink’s office and the last to leave, didn’t missed any class, and nailed all the exams, home-works, group projects, and essays.

Jordan was perfect and seemed like it would all pay-off when, in a morning they were just passing Brink’s schedule of the day, the man looked at him up and down.

“So, Jordan,” he said, resting back in his chair. “Luke told me you’re interest in taking Forensics as an elective program.”

“Oh, yes professor,” they nodded trying not too look so hopeful, or disappointed.

“There has been a lot of competition this semester,” he continued. “Clancy did good putting that girl there, she knows how the keep people on their toes.”

That girl. Clancy’s TA. Maggie (or Macy?).

“Here’s a tip,” Brink inclined himself forward and Jordan, without realizing, did the same. “Clancy might’ve mentioned the intention of opening the forms next Friday; you should keep an eye out.”

Jordan smiled. So large and so bright the dimple in their face was threatening to just burst. “Thank you, professor. I’ll keep a watch.”

And so they did. Never before so excite about a Friday in their life, taking in a brutal amount of workload to keep their mind from worrying ahead of time, but it was almost impossible now that they had a clear shot of where to go.

And when Friday came Jordan was up, bright and early, with heavy bags under their eyes and a thick vein jutting out in their forehead as they turn their computer on, and logged in the God U student portal.

And there it was, in bold blue letters on his screen.

Intro to Forensics – Form Application [pending]

It was a typical class form with question about the Crimefighting major and previous knowledge in the aspects of Hero Ethics and Combat 101. Jordan finished in less than minutes before sending it.

Intro to Forensics – Form Application [finished]

Now they just had to wait.

----

And wait they did. Trying not to let anxiety take over their body, this was one of the moments Jordan was thankful for Andre existing – and for him to be a huge nepo-baby with tons of cash.

The weekend passed like a blur, there was a kickback at some point in someone’s dorm – maybe Andre’s? Jordan didn’t actually remember. But the important thing was that there were enough drinking, popping pills, and snorting coke for Jordan to finally set their mind into something that wasn’t work. They ignored calls from their parents, let Brink emails pile themselves up in their inbox and just enjoyed the girl gurgling down their cock.

When Monday came they felt trashed.

There was a horrible taste in their mouth, hair was a mess, the clothes on their body weren’t theirs, someone vomited on their shoes (the fucking white Vans, fucking hell!) and headache, because obviously. They felt groggy and thirsty and when walking by the mess that was the residence hallway, they slipped in someone’s naked body and almost fell face first in some guy’s dick.

They checked the clock in their phone, 6:23 AM. They had time to go to their dorm and take a shower before going to Brink. There was barely anyone on campus yet, most students were sleeping or too deep down in an alcoholic coma, or and overdose, who could tell.

They only had half the mind to check the student portal for schedule update and…

“What the fuck?”

---

They entered the Crimefighting building with more than just intention, Jordan was pissed off.

The headache was still there, hammering inside their head like a bitch and they’re hungry as hell, there was still that horrible taste in their mouths and going to the Forensics course floor was a detour that would probably eat their time to take a shower and fix their hair – but fuck that in the moment.

They took the stairs two at a time, ignoring every one until they reached the entrance of professor Clancy’s office. It wasn’t much different them Brink’s office foyer. If anything it looked a lot more clinical, with the light-colored walls and flooring, the painting in the walls were of weird-ass abstract art, and behind a desk very similar to their own, was who he assumed to be Clancy’s TA.

And holy fuck! She was hot. Like striking beautiful, the type that made them glance once and then double take to be sure what they’re seeing was actually real, and it was, gladly. Brown skin that looked very soft, well-set curves and a face was just stunning, with pretty features, big brown-doe eyes and plump lips that made them think how good they would feel. The type of girl that could drive them insane with just the right bat of her long eyelashes.

She didn’t look at them at first, too focused on whatever she was typing, so they measured her. She wasn’t that tall, but taller than their female form, she had some necklaces dangling by her lean throat (fuck, what could they do to that throat) and wore a dark-red tank top that showed up her arms and hugged the contour of her tits in a sinful way.

With their knuckles Jordan knocked her table; she glanced at him, her face completely unimpressed. She annoyingly pulled her earphones off and ran her eyes up and down Jordan’s figure, her glance stopping by the base of their neck before finding their face.

“Can I help...?”

“You’re Clancy’s TA, Maggie, right?”

“My name’s Marie.” Fuck. “If you want to talk with Professor Clancy you must make an appointment at the student attention office by sending an email. They're open from 10 a.m until 05 p.m. And 12:30 a.m until 03:00 p.m on weekends.” She said, quick and uninterested, going back to whatever she was doing before they showed up.

“Yeah, that’s not why I’m here,” she still wasn’t looking at the, scribbling something on the notebook by her side – even her writing was pretty. “There’s been a mistake, with my schedule.”

“Oh, really?”

Jordan raised their eyebrows. Sarcasm? Seriously?

“Yes,” they hissed. “I signed up for Clancy’s Intro to Forensics, but is nowhere on my schedule.”

Marie (their not going to forget that name) signed and looked at him, eyes so open and yet Jordan couldn’t take a guess for dear life about what could be going through her head.

“What’s you name?” Her voice was so stale, as if she was reading a script.

Jordan frowned. “Jordan Li…” she types swiftly on the keyboard, her hands are way to fucking pretty too like, damn. “I’m, like, rank number two.”

“Good for you, I guess,” Well, okay, fuck. It would be better if she just told them to fuck off already. “It seemed that you were rejected…” she meets their eyes. “Jordan Li, rank number two.”

“Sorry, what?” Jordan chuckled. “What do you mean? I sent the form as soon they’re open.”

Marie just wasn’t even pretending to pay attention, setting herself aloof. “We’re crowded. Professor Clancy’s class is much requested and the last two vacant spots have already been taken, so…Sorry.”

“Wait,” Jordan chimed, they didn’t want to lose their shit right now, and they already felt like shit. “This can’t be.”

Marie shrugged. “Better luck next time, I guess.”

“Who took the last chair?”

“I won’t tell you that,” Marie huffed. “Look, I’ve been receiving shitty emails of entitled top 10 all weekend, so let me make this easy for both of us – most of you top 20s, 10s and 5s, think all you’ve gotta do is show up, major in Crimefighting, crush at Forensics and Combat 101, and score a city contract, that easy; but life is way harder than that.” Marie inhales deeply, inclining herself forward to read something on the computer screen. “All the spots of Forensics had been taken by people with cleared techniques in lifesaving, along with crime fighting. And you...You didn’t even sign up the Safe-on-Campus petition.”

Jordan breathed, deeply. Fuck that she was pretty and hot as fuck; they never felt so much anger towards someone before. Who did she think she was?

“Now, I’m kind of busy, so if you can…”

“I want to talk to Professor Clancy about this.”

“No.”

“Why not?”

“Because I made the call, I’m her TA.”

“Oh, so it was your decision?” Marie inhales heavily once again. “Who the fuck do you think you are to reject me?”

Their glances were set on each other so thoroughly Jordan could almost fell the weight, when she moved to stand up they responded by shifting into male, watching with annoyed satisfaction as she had to raise her eyes to keep their staring battle. Marie didn't faltered, though.

“I’m her TA.”

#lgbt #gen v #marie moreau #fanfic #fic #jordan li x marie moreau #jordan x marie #mariejordan #gen v marie #gen v jordan #limoreau #derek luh #jaz sinclair #london thor #hecksilver #imagine

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anthemofgvf · 1 year

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Endless Summer: Josh Kiszka x Reader Fanfiction

Part Seven

description: you and sammy have been best friends since you were kids, and being around his family was the norm your entire life. when invited to a trip to their family lake house during the summer, you find yourself spending more time with his brother than your best friend. and, one thing has been clear your entire friendship: brothers are off limits.

warnings for this series: alcohol and marijuana usage, explicit content (18+, minors dni), angst, swearing

word count: 8.8k+

⊱ ━━━━.⋅ εïз ⋅.━━━━ ⊰

Slight shifting in your sleep, sniffling every few seconds to stifle your tears through the night. You were thankful you grew tired of crying and that was your way to sleep. But waking up the next morning with your body being its own alarm, you were reminded of the events of last night.

Every time you blinked to keep your eyes from their dry state, flickers of Sam's face flashed behind your lids. You had never seen someone look at you in such betrayal, let alone your best friend. For a moment, you thought it was a horrific nightmare, but with the scent of Josh's natural musk hitting your nose, you knew you were stupid to try and convince yourself that you hadn't completely broken Sam's trust for you.

And then there you were again, choking up on your hot tears and muffling yourself in Josh's chest just in case it would wake him up. It did stir him awake, and with a slight groan, he squeezed you tightly as a hand raised to the side of your head to place strangled hairs behind your ear.

You felt like apologizing for crying. For waking him up because you were riddled with such guilt. But you didn't think you'd be able to coherently say something with your throat holding itself in a knot, so you just ignored using words for now.

Josh pressed a light kiss on your forehead, rubbing his hand on your back up and down to try and soothe you. You were indecisive on whether to meet his eyes or not, but you chose too anyways.

You snaked a hand through your bodies and up to your face as you wiped your eyes clean of tears. With a few deep, collected breaths, you were able to suppress your crying and only feel the light headache that always told you that you weren't done crying, but for now, you were.

"How are you feeling?" Josh asked you hoarsely. He knew the answer; it was obvious with the lingering tears that rested in your waterlines. But he chose to bear the question anyways.

You let out an airy laugh in attempt to keep your suppressed cries down. "Like shit."

He clicked his teeth and pushed his bottom lip out enough into a pout. If a single tear fell down your cheek, he was there to wipe it free with his thumb.

You exhaled shakily, tugging on your bottom lip once your chin began to quiver. "I feel like a terrible fucking friend. I feel like this is all my fault."

He nodded slowly. "It's not your fault."

"Well, it has to be someone's, right? I'm not blaming you for this, because that's a shitty thing to do, but I think we are both in the wrong."

He gave you another nod. With a huff, he said, "I don't think we should settle on blaming each other because we are together, and Sam doesn't approve." He caressed your cheek with his thumb lightly. "You're not...you're not regretting any of this, are you?"

For a second, you hesitated. Of course, you didn't regret any of it, but regret did in fact punch you in the gut when you saw Sam's reaction. You weren't going to answer with uncertainty of how you felt, because this was not the time to lose another person and put you through more grief than you already had seemed to be in. You have always been sure of wanting Josh, despite what your best friend thought. But seeing how hurt Sam was, how disappointed he was in the both of you, gave you the impression that he would never forgive you.

"No, no I don't, Josh." You rubbed your lips together, following it with an inhale. "I just, I don't know how I'm going to face Sam again. There's now a huge elephant in the room we have to address, and I don't think I'm going to be able to do it without breaking down and feeling like I'm the wrong."

"You can't burden yourself with guilt because of him. You can't just let him make you feel shitty about your decisions because he doesn't like them. That's his own thing to deal with and get over." He cupped your cheek with his pinky finger running under your jaw to maintain eye contact with you. "I don't feel bad about anything we've done, but I do feel upset knowing I hurt him. But I'm not going to call it quits with you because he can't get a grip on the fact that we can't choose who we fall for. You said that the first night we kissed, remember?"

You gave him a quick nod. You knew he had more to say, so you watched him take a hesitant pause with an exhale and continuing.

"You can't blame yourself for having feelings, y/n. No matter how much you try to control them, they'll just end up bubbling up and consuming you until you can't fight them off anymore. Sam has every right to be upset because he's human, but he doesn't have the right to choose who you go out with. All we can do is just explain ourselves to him, and hope that he'll agree not to dismiss us because he doesn't like us together."

You slightly furrowed your brows together. "What if he doesn't want to talk to us? To see us? What if he's just so pissed off that he's decided to completely cut me off and-."

"Y/n, y/n," he gave you a quiet chuckle, rubbing your cheek with his thumb in a coaxing matter to get you to stop your rambling. "He's not going to do that. And he can't take me out of his life because we're brothers who so happen to be in a band together. You've been his best friend for so many years and this is the singular bump in the road you two have had together. If he's stuck around for this long, he's sure to listen and try to understand you and I."

You released yourself from his grasp as you rolled onto your back. You pressed the palm of your hand onto your forehead and gazed up to the ceiling. "All of this is giving me a headache," you shot your eyes to Josh, who raised himself up by his forearm and gave you a quiet laugh. "I just hope he doesn't hate me."

"Hate is a strong word." Josh cocked his head to the side and put on a sympathetic face.

"All of Sam's feelings are strong. I'm sure he feels a bit of hatred towards me, or us both. I mean, I don't blame him for feeling it."

"I know this is going to be hard to stop thinking about, but we should get some breakfast. Get up and get ready for the day so we can talk to him, alright? I'll be by your side through all of this. There's two of us in a relationship, not just one. I promise you that everything is going to-."

"Well, you promised me that he wouldn't find out the way he did, but that happened." You shot up from the bed, throwing your covers off yourself as you stood up from your mattress. You weren't sure why you were growing frustrated with Josh, maybe because he seemed to not be on the same level of hurt as you. "How can I believe that everything is going to be fine when he told me he was disappointed in me and looked at me with no remorse?" You flung your hands out from your sides. "How can I trust in you that you're going to help me fix this?"

He brought himself up on his knees and scooted over to you, flinging his legs off the bed and standing in front of you. "All I can do," he brought his hands to your face, "is promise you that I'm going to fix this - that we're going to fix this. All I can do is assure you that your pain is only temporary and that he's not going to fuck everything up because you feel guilty about it. You promised me that you wouldn't let him get in the way of us. Now, that's one promise I don't want to break." His eyes flicked between the both of yours before continuing. "Do you?"

Your eyes began to well up again with your bottom lip starting the rapid pace of shaking. He was speaking to you with a stern voice, and you weren't looking for a fight. You were just so exhausted with everything happening at once, and everything falling out of line. This wasn't in the plan; this wasn't supposed to happen. Now, you were unprepared. You were stuck staring at Josh with the thought of hesitancy.

You let out a choked breath that your throat forced you to release. "I don't, Josh. I'm just doubtful that this will all work itself out."

He brought your forehead to his lips, placing a long kiss onto it. After doing so, he brought you into his arms and had you wrapping your own around his back. "All we can do is grabble up as much hope as we can. It might take time to sort this out, but at least we can say we put the effort into making this better."

You squeezed him as tightly as your shut eyes were pressing themselves. Any tears that brewed up in your waterline had you forcing them out of your system so you could keep your composure. You were sick of crying over this, sick of feeling emotionally drained over the situation. It was the most frustrating thing to try and understand who was at fault in this, because who was to blame? It was like all of you were in the wrong, but all right in your own ways at the same time. An agonizing headache pounded at the back of your brain, and you decided that it was time to stop plaguing yourself and try to go on with the day.

You looked to Josh with your lips sealed together, nodding in understanding and bringing yourself to his lips. That kiss felt more like a promise to him. Like a promise that you weren't going to, in a sense, break up with him because of Sam. A promise to him that you weren't going to let your emotions get the best of you because Sam was a creeping thought in the back of your mind telling you that you should feel ashamed of your actions.

⊱ ━━━━.⋅ εïз ⋅.━━━━ ⊰

You and Josh walked downstairs to Jake sitting at the island with a red coffee cup in hand. He found the both of you, smiling at the sight and placing his cup down as he folded his hands together.

"Glad to see you both awake. Haven't seen Sam yet, though." He shrugged, standing up and placing his plate into the sink. "I made him some avocado toast, but I think it's gross by now."

You looked to Josh, who gave you the same look of "he doesn't know". You could feel the knot in your throat twisting again and nausea thumping around in your stomach, but you gave yourself a moment to breathe before nodding to Josh as a sign you wanted him to speak for you.

"He's probably not going to come down. Best if you just give him his food yourself." Josh muttered with his eyes shot down to his feet.

Jake cocked his brow at the both of you, giving himself a second to look between you and Josh in confusion. "Did something happen?"

You gave him a silent nod. "He knows now." You gave a quick look to Josh, then back to his twin.

Jake's eyes widened, mouth partially hung open and pressing his tongue into his cheek. "Oh," he said, "guessing he didn't take it well?"

Flashes of his scowling face and his bitter words flew in your mind. All you could give to Jake was a shake of your head as you pressed your lips together to contain yourself from crying. There was no point in letting any tears fall to show your sadness when your body language already spoke for you of your guilt.

Josh placed his hand on your lower back in an attempt to console you. "Not at all."

"Guess that explains why he hasn't come down yet." He shrugged with a sigh. "Should I go check on him?"

"You don't think he wants to be left alone?" Josh questioned him.

Jake rolled his head to the side, then tilting it slightly back in thought. "Probably, but I'm still going to go see if he's okay. He doesn't know that I know, so maybe I'll get something out of him."

You both nodded in agreement to Jake, and he left the both of you alone to go to Sam's bedroom. You let your eyes and head follow Jake up the stairs and finally watching him disappear. You even tuned your ears to see if Sam would let him in, and when you heard the door open and close, you exhaled heavily before turning your attention back to Josh.

He had grabbed you a plate of waffles, doused in syrup, and you both joined together on the couch in the living room. You even found yourself sitting in the same spot you and Sam cuddled up together at on the sofa for the movie night.

Josh took his place next to you with a plate of his own, handing you a fork and digging into his breakfast quietly. The air was tense. There wasn't much to say, so you both just ate in silence. Eating seemed to help keep you from crying, so you just focused on the food in front of you and stuffing it into your mouth to ignore any thought of your best friend.

You found yourself with no appetite, but still eating at least half of the sticky waffles Josh grabbed for you. You left quietly to clean off your plate, then looking over to Josh who watched your every move.

He eventually picked himself up after a few moments and joined you at the sink and embraced you from behind. He placed multiple kisses along your shoulders, trailing up to your neck and cheek until you released a light giggle. He gave you a small smile, pecking your lips and continuing to watch you wash dishes with his head over your shoulder.

Eventually the day carried on and still no sight of Sam. Jake notified you that Sam was barely speaking to him and said he just wanted to be left alone, so you all agreed to carry on the day without him.

It didn’t feel right doing things without him, especially because he was the one that invited you here in the first place. Going anywhere without him made any atmosphere feel off. You couldn't pretend he wasn't in town or that he was out with friends. With Josh's hand intertwined with yours, you were reminded that Sam was alone in his room with his thoughts. Who knows if he was thinking about what you and Josh were up to, or if he was dissociating to forget about his frustrations.

You all tried occupying yourself with things to do away from the lake house, like taking a trip downtown to the shops and having dinner there. Jake wasn't affected by the situation, and you were sure that Josh was putting on his best face for you. But in your case, masking your miserable attitude wasn't as easy. And, you didn't have any energy to hide your true feelings anyways.

When you all arrived at home, you were hoping to catch Sam in the kitchen or living room. Maybe watching television or finishing up a meal. But he was still out of sight, and you were growing tired of the distance.

"Do you still want to sit around the fire tonight, y/n?" Josh pulled you to the side as Jake plopped himself on the couch.

"Yeah, yeah I do." You tucked a piece of hair behind your ear. "Think I'm going to go talk to Sam, though."

Josh quirked his brows. "Do you think he'll talk to you?"

"It's childish of him to lock himself in his room all day and throw a tantrum. He has to come out sometime soon. He's here with all of us, anyways." You shrugged. "I'll just ask him if he wants to sit by the fire with us."

Josh pressed his lips to your cheek and gave you a nod. Once you left his side to make the somewhat treacherous journey to Sam's bedroom, the twins went outside to get the fire started.

You dragged your feet to his door, and although the hallway wasn't that long, it felt like a never-ending walk. As much as you wanted to see Sam, even if it had only been less than a day, you were unsure if he wanted to see you. He was notorious for holding grudges, especially about things that he highly disapproved of. But you weren't going to let that stray you away from speaking to him.

With a few seconds of hesitation, you gave a few light taps onto the brown wooden door with your knuckles and waited for a response. When none was given to you, your eyes flicked to the doorknob. Would he be upset with you that you entered without his consent?

But when did he ever knock when he'd come visit you?

You turned the doorknob slowly, placing your hand flat on the door and scanning the room quickly. He was sitting on his bed with a pair of sweat shorts, a baggy tank top and his hair tossed up into a bun. His phone screen lit up his expressionless face, but when he looked up to see you, he ignored your presence and put his eyes back onto whatever his phone had to offer.

"Hey," you gave him a small smile, leaning onto the doorframe, "we're going to sit around the firepit for a little. Do you want to join us?"

You waited for a few moments until he gave you a scoff. Looking up to you to show his stern appearance then occupying his focus on his phone screen, you just left him alone by quietly shutting his door and leaving to go to outside for the night.

When the boys saw you alone, Josh stood up quickly once he saw your face contort into one that showed your anguished feelings. Chin slightly quivering, eyes brimmed up with tears, but quickly wiping them away with a sniffle and sitting in your seat without a word. Hopefully by not speaking, you would be able to compose yourself and let your eyes go out of focus on the fire.

"Did he say anything to you?" Josh said.

"Nope. Just looked at me." You stated flatly.

"I think it's time I said something to him." Josh sighed. That caught your attention, and your eyes immediately shot up to him.

"Josh, I don't think he-."

But he cut you off right away. "He can't stay cooped up in there. We need to talk about this, whether we both say something, or one of us does. Maybe I can get him to talk to me."

Josh wasn't going to let you defer him, so you just gave him a singular nod and watched as he walked with a fast pace to the lake house. You blew air out of your mouth, shaped like an "O" with your cheeks puffed out, and relaxed fully forward with your hands folded over one another.

Without a word, Jake took a seat next to you. You weren't sure if it was so that way you wouldn't feel as lonely as you possibly could, or just a change of seating. But he poked at your arm, and your eyes left the fire to look at him.

"Do you want to talk about it? What he said?" He spoke softly with his face lit in a sympathetic expression.

You gave him a short laugh that exhaled through your nose. "I mean, there's nothing much to talk about. He just...was beyond frustrated. Completely blew up with anger." A tight-lipped smile spread on your lips. "Said he was disappointed in me. Said that Josh didn't care about his feelings to his face. It was just inhumane the way he was yelling at the both of us. I have never seen him get so upset before."

You ignored the choking sensation in your throat by clearing it away and running the back of your hand under your nose.

At first, Jake said that he was sorry. But he continued. "He's acting like this is his decision to make."

You exhaled an airy laugh, because that's all you and Josh have said as a reason to continue your relationship because it wasn't Sam's choice.

"Can I be honest with you?" Jake repositioned himself in his chair and leaned forward. When you gave him a nod in agreement, he carried on. "It's definitely a tough position you're in, which is why it's so difficult to figure out what to do. I don't blame you for being upset, but I also don't blame him for feeling the same way."

"I just, I just don't know what to do. You know, I care about the both of them so much. I don't want to break things off with Josh because of Sam, but I don't want to lose my best friend. It'd be stupid for him to want to cut me out of his life because of this, because after all, if me and Josh continue to see each other he'll have to be around me anyways. But I can't just go back to being friends with Josh after everything that's happened. I've had feelings for him for too long for me to just pretend that I never did."

Jake took your words in with a silent nod. He took a few moments to speak, just so he could come up with an answer that would give you some sort of helpful idea of what move was best to make next. "You're in a tight spot, y/n. And it's really not my place to tell you what you should do. But, if you want my advice, I'd try to talk things out with Sam. That's all you can do, honestly. He's just going to have to deal with it. Doesn't mean that he should immediately be okay with it, but it also doesn't mean that he shouldn't give it a shot."

He took another breath before continuing. "I've never been in your position, but that's what I'd do: talk to him and have him realize how much you two care about each other. I don't think he wants to wrap his head around the fact that you truly like Josh because he thinks that you'll make Josh your number one priority instead of him. He's afraid of change, and afraid of someone interfering with your guys' friendships."

"You think he sees Josh as a threat?" You scrunched your eyebrows together.

"Well, yeah. I mean, Josh is the older brother. He's going to see either of us as a problem if it comes to you because you're, well, you. He views you as his little sister, or perhaps the one thing that doesn't have to involve his brothers. Someone that doesn't include us and doesn't have to because you'll stick by his side no matter what. But now that he's seen that that isn't the case, he's threatened."

"I just don't understand, Jake. I mean, I've been friends with him for so long. I've never once put anyone before him, let alone you or Josh. I don't know why he has the connotation that I'd ever let someone get in the way of our friendship."

"I don't know either," he shrugged, "but all you can do is force him to see your side. I can see where he's coming from, but he shouldn't be worried about it. It's not something that should tarnish a friendship."

You ran the tip of your tongue on your bottom lip. "I sure hope not. I mean, I even told Josh that Sam can't choose who I fall for, you know? I can't pick how I feel about people, because no one can do that. It just...happens. I mean, for a while, I felt guilty about my feelings for Josh. But when he told me how he felt, I just gave up on thinking about what Sam would say. At the end of the day, he shouldn't be involved in our relationship anyways."

"I think he's more concerned that you won't need him anymore. I mean, you're going to go to Josh first when you want to talk about something. He's going to be the first person that you'll want to tell anything. And for a while, that was Sam."

"Yeah, I get that. And I don't want him to feel that way at all because that isn't the case. Of course, I'll probably tell Josh things more often than Sam. But that doesn't mean I'm going to leave him high and dry."

"You should reassure him that, then. Think you've got it all figured out what you want to say to him." He placed his hand on your shoulder and gave you a soft smile.

You took in a deep breath and nodded, relaxing back into your chair to watch the fire you hadn't paid much attention to.

"Oh, and by the way," Jake started, "I may be bias, but don't break up with Josh. He's crazy about you."

You quietly giggled and reserved to smiling to yourself from Jake's words. It was comforting to know that even his brother saw how much he cared about you - how deep his emotions ran. It was a nice way to lighten the mood just enough, and for you to run through what you were going to say to Sam.

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You returned into the lake house and saw Josh stepping down the stairs. You quickly met him halfway and placed your hand on his shoulder.

"Hey, what happened?" You flicked your eyes between his own.

"We sat down and argued - a lot, actually," he laughed, "but I think I got through to him. Might be your turn to go talk to him."

"You think?"

Josh gave you a nod. "I promise."

He cradled your face in his hands and brought your lips onto his softly. The kiss was held for a few moments, before he pulled away and looked at you with an affectionate smile. "Go. I'll be in my room waiting for you."

After the short interaction, you walked quickly upstairs to Sam's bedroom. Without any more moments of hesitation, you knocked on the door and entered.

He was sat on the edge of his bed with his hands folded, eyes immediately meeting yours when you were fully in focus. The both of you shared a moment of staring. You noticed the way his shoulders were scrunched up together, and it seemed that he was trying to cool off from the previous conversation he had with Josh.

"Are you ready to talk now?" You folded your arms together.

"Don't think there's anything else to talk about, y/n. Sure your boyfriend said everything there was to say." He shrugged with a scoff, then averted his eyes to the window in front of him.

You walked over to him and sat next to him, keeping your eyes on his tense face. "Well, I still want to talk to you about this. I'm not going to let Josh be the speaker for the both of us. I want you to hear me as well."

He met your eyes with a face of annoyance, but when he stayed mute, you figured that was him giving you the floor.

"Look, I know how you feel about this. I know it makes you upset, and I know you probably think that our friendship won't mean as much to me anymore. But that's not the case at all. I can balance a romantic and platonic relationship at the same time."

"How long have you two been together for?"

You furrowed your brows. "Did he not tell you?"

"Didn't ask."

"Oh," you nodded, "well, I think about two weeks? Maybe a week and a half to be a bit more specific."

"So, it started on this trip?" He pointed his finger to the ground.

You nodded slowly. "But we've both had feelings for each other before this. Long before this, in fact. We both just didn't know until we went out at night and he-."

"You guys have been hanging out alone?"

"Yes, Sam." You sighed. "Did you expect us to hang out with you guys and us confess to each other how we felt in front of you?"

"Expected you two not to 'confess' anything at all." He shook his head in slight disbelief. "Even after talking to him, I don't understand why you both decided to go behind my back. You know how hurt that makes me, y/n? Doesn't matter that it may have started as friendly. You both never said anything about it."

"You would've been pissed at us if we told you that we were hanging out without you and Jake. Would you have not?"

You watched him give you a huff, followed by an eye roll. He looked away from you for a moment, then stood from the bed and walked to the door. Watching his movements gave you the impression you were supposed to follow him. So, you stood up from the bed and stepped towards him. But he just shut the door and faced you with his back pressed against it.

"You figured that I would just be okay with this? I mean, the thought of you with my brother is just...gross." He shivered lightly for effect.

"We knew you'd be upset. We just thought that you would understand we have feelings for each other that we didn't want to deny anymore. We can't choose who we fall in love with."

"You can think before you act, though." He folded his arms. "Did, did you say, 'love'?"

Your eyes widened slightly. You stammered a few breaths, but none of them consisted of any words.

"You're kidding me, right? You love him? It's been a week or two and you're in love with him, y/n?" He stood off the door and strode to you slowly. His face was becoming a light red, with his eyes squinted.

"I don't fucking know, Sam. So, what if I did? I've known him for just as long as you."

He rolled his eyes again. "I-I don't even know what to say to that."

"Well, why can't you accept that I want to be with Josh, and you have no say in it?" You were growing frustrated. You had your arms folded together tightly, with your lips pressed together firmly.

He shook his head at you. "Because it's just wrong, y/n." He dragged out your name. "I don't fucking like it. You're supposed to be my best friend and here you are running off with my brother."

"I'm not 'running off' with your brother, Sam. I'm never going to put him before you, or you before him. Why can't we live in a world where I can have both? It's like you don't even care about how I feel."

He widened his eyes with the flare of his nostrils. "How you feel? You don't even seem to care about how I feel about this! You're completely just pushing me to the side for your own selfish pleasures because you're living in your own little world where only you and your feelings matter."

"You're being fucking childish!" You pointed your finger at him as your voice raised. "Just because I put what I want first for once in my entire life and not you I'm selfish? Sam, you don't get to tell me what I can and can't do because you don't like it. Now, that's selfish."

"Did you even consider how I felt at all?" His eyes softened a little. Under all the anger, all the frustration, he was hurt. Hurt because you did something without him. Hurt because you went behind his back. "Do you think that I'm entirely in the wrong for feeling the way I feel about this?"

"No, you have every right to be upset about this. I can't control how you feel about things. But I can persuade you into seeing things the way I do because I'm not letting you change my mind on this one. You know how fucking bad I felt seeing how upset you were? Did you know I cried myself to sleep? I cried and cried until I couldn't breathe because I felt so terrible about this! I could've come to you when this started in the first place, but to be honest, I didn't even know how to talk to you about this because I knew you wouldn't understand. Now, I have to stand here and yell at you for you to hear me. Do you realize how pathetic that is?"

He exhaled deeply. All he could do was stare at you with questioning. You tried to pick at his brain through his expression what he was thinking, but for the first time, you didn't know what was on his mind. All you knew was that he was angry and saddened, but that was it. He wasn't giving you any hints for predictability.

His eyes averted from yours and fell to the floor, as if he felt defeated. "Do you care about him more than me?"

"Sam, you can't-."

"Well, do you?" He looked to you, with his eyebrows pulled together. His anger was still present, but the shades of stinging grief shined brighter.

"I care about you both equally. I don't put him on a pedestal because he's my boyfriend. It's a different kind of love I have for the both of you."

He gave you a singular, slow nod. "You were the one thing I had that my brothers didn't." His eyes lightly glistened. If it weren't for the moonlight, you wouldn't be able to see the tears beginning to appear. "Now, Josh has you, and Jake knew all along about you two. I don't have my best friend as much as I used to."

Jake predicted Sam better than you could have. You were taken aback by his words, and especially him shedding his anger to show you the wounds you left. Your face softened and you shook your head in astonishment. Under everything, he was scared of losing you. It seemed more like a misunderstanding, and like he was being a bit too jealous. He never wanted to share you, because after all, that's all he's had to do with his brothers. Third best, third to know - it was all familiar to him. He thought that it would never be the case between you two, but now it was just reminding him off all the things he lost to his older brothers. You would be the greatest loss of them all.

"You're not going to lose me, okay?" You comforted him. You thought of his words to be a bit dramatic, but all of his outbursts were. "I'm not going to push you to the side because I'm with your brother. At the end of the day, you've done more for me than anyone has. I can't just forget all the years that we've spent being friends. I don't want you to ever think that."

He looked away from you again and off to the side of the room. He was collecting himself again in hopes that his vulnerability would wash away. All you could do was give him the time he needed. So, you stood there and waited for a response. "I think you just need to reevaluate your decisions."

"What do you mean by that?" You gave him a puzzled look.

"It's going to take me some time to get over this. I mean, this really fucking hurt, y/n. I think you need to figure out what matters more to you right now."

Your neck brought your head back. You were in shock. If he meant what you thought he meant, you were wondering if you had even gotten through to him with everything you said.

You swallowed your spiteful words and chose to face him with a question. "Are you giving me an ultimatum right now?"

"Is that what it sounds like?" He threw his hands up. It was as if he was frustrated that you had to even ask the question for closure.

"So, none of what I said to you matters and we just argued for no fucking reason for you to tell me I need to choose between you and Josh? Are...are you kidding me?" Your mouth hung open. You still didn't let yourself believe that's what he was going to leave you with. You didn't expect him to just be fine with your new relationship with his brother straight away, but you expected him to try and give it some thought.

"I don't know what else to say to you, y/n. Think I made myself perfectly clear." He gave you a shrug and stood with his statement.

You scoffed. "You're so unbelievably stubborn. Grow the fuck up, Sam. Just because my decisions aren't in your hands doesn't mean you should make me choose between you and your brother. That's childish."

"Seems like you've already made your mind, then." He nodded and stepped back to open the door.

"You're serious?"

"Yup." He nodded his head quickly.

You weren't done talking with him just yet. "Why can't you just accept that I can be friends with you and date Josh at the same time?"

"Why can't you accept that you went behind my back and broke our trust? Yeah, the whole relationship makes me angry, but the fact that you kept it a secret from me is far worse."

"You wouldn't have been okay with it either way, Sam. You can't just try to put up with it instead of clearing it off the table because you don't like it?" You threw your hand out to the side as you spoke.

"Right now, I don't want to even endure it at all. I'm beyond upset with you. When you promise something, you don't break it."

"Well, some promises are meant to be broken." You shook your head. You had only let your voice raise a little, but not enough to be considered yelling. You didn't want the rest of the household to hear you, but you wanted Sam to know you were clearly frustrated with how he was acting.

He took in a sharp inhale and chose to exhale his words. "If that's what you think, then I guess our little discussion is over."

You stood there for a moment to just take in the entire situation. You couldn't wrap your head around the fact that Sam was finally throwing his barrier down, only to flush it away and tell you that you had a choice to make. That wasn't what you were expecting, and after all, it wasn't something you should've had to make.

You finally left the room and stormed down the stairs. You let the feeling of tears forming in your eyes fully consume you. It was uncertain whether you were crying out of anger, sadness - or both, but you didn't care. You were going to let yourself feel whatever your body told you to feel because you didn't even know yourself.

You burst into Josh's room without a warning and causing him to shoot up from his position of laying down and sprawling his hands out at his sides.

"He wants me to choose between you and him. You know how fucking stupid that is, Josh?" You began. "At first, it seemed like I was finally getting him to accept that me and you were going to be together despite what he said," you began to laugh, "but no, he just turned it around and told me that it was him or you."

You could feel your lips shake with your chin and watched as Josh got up slowly from his bed. He placed his hands on your shoulders and examined your face to tell him that you weren't just making this up.

"What are you going to do?" He spoke softly.

"I don't know." You said with wide eyes. You brought your hand to your forehead and continued. "I can't believe that he would do something like this. I don't want to lose him, but I don't want to lose you. I mean, do you think time will tell whether he will come around or not?"

"I'm not sure," he said with disappointment, "but whatever happens, just know that you can't control what he thinks. I know he means a lot to you, and I know how much he cares about you. I'm sure with time he'll realize how immature he's acting and realize that he can't make you pick between us. I'm in disbelief, honestly."

"Yeah, so am I." You laughed. Now, you were just crying out of exhaustion. Tired of all the fighting, all the games Sam was playing with you, all of the words Josh would say to try and console you. It was all too much for you. "I just want to sleep. Can't keep crying over this because it's stupid."

He let you leave his grasp and you made yourself comfortable in his bed, turning on your side and allowing him to wrap himself around you from behind. He held your back close to his chest, pressing kissing on your head every now and then. Your crying came to an end quickly, and you were finally able to rest your eyes.

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With a few days passing since your encounter with Sam, he had been a bit less distant. Although he was still keeping his distance from you guys, he'd come down and join you all for meals, and even once or twice sitting by the fire at nights with you three. He hadn't talked much since the day you both fought, but he at least acknowledged you all with a quick glance and smile.

You tried making small talk to him, even though there was no point. Even the twins tried to get him to speak, but to no avail. He wasn't budging, and it was just upsetting to see how he could become so ignorant because of his own frustrations.

There was even a time where Josh held your hand across the table at breakfast, and Sam came down to see the sight. You pulled away, and all Sam did was laugh and tell you both there's no need for pretending anymore. And, after that, he made himself some toast and ate in his bedroom.

Seeing where he left the rooms empty was disheartening. It was as if he wasn't there at all, even though you knew he was. All you wanted was for your best friend to be content with you, and maybe with these past few days of separation, he was overthinking everything that happened.

When the trip had landed to only one week left, Sam came back for breakfast and took his usual seat next to you at the dining table. You didn't let it surprise you, nor did you make any comments about it. Going about the arrangement, you knew to act casual. But Jake and Josh just gave Sam a few looks and choosing not to say a word to him.

You knew Jake had gone to see him once or twice. Neither you nor Josh made the effort to talk to Sam because the agonizing grudge he was holding upon you two was still set in stone. Even if you considered it immature, you said all you could say to him. Apologies weren't going to cut it anymore.

He sat quietly next to you and swirled his spoon around in the small bowl that held a mixture of yogurt and oats. You were thankful to see him out of the corner of your peripheral, because you were able to predict that he had something on his mind. Maybe he was just uncomfortable, or maybe he was lost in thought.

He lifted his head up for a moment, taking in everyone at the table before returning his eyes to his plate. His mouth parted open for a moment, and it had you turning your direction to him. But he just shut his mouth and reserving his attention to eating.

"There's, uh, a winery nearby." Jake spoke up to slice the quiet atmosphere. "Figured we could check it out, you know, do something different."

You hummed. "Yeah, that sounds nice."

Josh also agreed with a nod. Then there was Sam, who had stayed mute still. You all three turned to him and waited for him to budge. But nothing. Jake and Josh, who sat opposite of you two, ignored his silence and continued to finish their meal. But you, you just kept your eyes glued on him. You were hoping that by looking at him, he'd grow upset and say something. Anything.

"Danny's coming." Sam muttered before taking a bite of his food.

"Well, maybe he can join us. It'd be nice to see him. Been a while." Josh chimed in.

Sam scoffed. "He's coming to get me."

All of you stopped your motions. Now, everyone had their eyes locked on him.

Sam continued to reiterate. "I'm leaving."

You placed your fork down on your plate, loud enough for it to ring against the ceramic material. "You're what?"

"You heard me. I'm leaving." He turned his head to you and watched your face falter. He continued to keep his focus on you for just a few seconds, then looking down into his bowl.

"Sam, you can't leave. You came here with us. You can't go because you're mad about Josh and y/n." Jake rolled his eyes as he tried to reason with his brother.

"This trip just isn't fun anymore." He shrugged. The chair screeched against the wooden floors as he stood from it. "No point in me staying if I'm just going to be miserable."

You looked up to him with your jaw partially hung low. "You're making Danny drive two hours because you can't get over it? Have, have you even thought about accepting it?"

"Oh, don't worry, I have." He tilted his chin down to you. "But I don't think I want to. Besides, I think you'll have a much better time here without me. Seems like you were able to when you were sneaking around with Josh."

"Sam-."

"No, no, it's okay." He cut you off and gave you a faux sympathetic look. "I understand where your priorities are; I get it. Fucking my brother is much more important to you than preserving our friendship. Fine by me."

He walked away from the table and emptied his bowl. You all gave each other odd glances in questioning. What were you to say to that when you were left in shock?

Jake stood from his chair. "Do you hear how immature you sound right now, Sam? Dude, get a grip."

"This doesn't involve you, Jake. It never did, so it's beyond me why they told you in the first place. Left me out of it and kept it a secret. Played along in their little sneaky shenanigans because you're just as shitty as the both of them." He pointed his finger at Jake. "I just don't want to be here with you three anymore." He glanced at you and Josh. "I'll be gone before you guys get back."

You cocked your head to the side in annoyance. "You're being dramatic, Sam."

"Well, call me what you want. But at least I never went behind your back and broke our trust. I would never do something as fucked up as that because I actually care about our friendship."

You had opened your mouth to speak, but he left before you could utter a sound. It was his way of telling you he was done with the conversation, and that you had no say in what his actions were. You reserved back to the two boys that sat in front of you, but both of their eyes were blown wide.

"He has no concept of sharing." Jake mumbled, to which Josh elbowed his arm and gave him a stern look.

You just ignored Jake's comment and stormed up to Sam's bedroom. With his door left opened, you stopped in your tracks to watch him pack his clothes without your presence being noticed. He seemed content with his choice while he absentmindedly folded his shirts neatly into a pile before plopping them into the suitcase.

Your heart tugged towards his direction, and you dragged yourself into his room.

"You're not seriously leaving, are you?" You spoke with concern. Although you were upset, you didn't have the energy to pick a fight with him and raise your voice.

"What does it look like?" He mumbled as he kept his eyes on his clothing.

"I don't want you to go. None of us-."

But he was sure to cut you off. "It doesn't matter. I've already made up my mind. Hope you have fun spending the rest of this week with the two people you care about most."

You rolled your eyes. "I care about you just as much, Sam."

All he gave you was a shrug with a light sarcastic smile. "I don't know what to believe anymore. I was able to trust you with everything, and now that you've shown me that I can't," he flicked his eyes down to you, "I don't want to find out what else you've been lying to me about."

You opened your mouth to speak, but you shut it with an aggravated whine. You knew there was no point in defending yourself. He wasn't going to give you the time of day to let you tell him that he was overreacting about everything. He was too stubborn to convince, so you gave up.

You walked back down the stairs and saw Jake and Josh conversing by the living room.

"He's really leaving." You threw your hands up. "I can't believe he's really leaving because of this."

"There's no point in pushing him any further," Josh began, "he's made up his mind on how he wants to handle it. Nothing we can do now."

You scoffed. "And you said that we'd be able to fix this. You said that you had it all figured out and that I wouldn't have to worry. But here we are, with Sam pissed at all of us because of this stupid relationship, and him having Danny drive two fucking hours because he can't be in the same house as us anymore."

Jake walked off. He knew it wasn't his place to be in this conversation anymore, so he gave you and Josh the space that you two needed.

Josh took a few steps towards you and lowered his voice as he spoke. "You can't expect this to all be okay in a matter of seconds, y/n. You and I both are well aware that Sam is beyond obstinate about everything. He just needs time to think about it and space. That's all we can give him. I-I don't know what else you want from me."

You huffed. After all, he was right. You were just frustrated that time wasn't on your side. Hell, when was it ever?

You wrapped your arms around his neck, and in return, he brought you into an embrace with his hands enveloped around your back. You were hopeful that the closeness between you two would help you relax.

"I'm just so upset about all of this. It's annoying that there's nothing we can do about it. It's out of our hands, out of our control, and I'm pissed. I just wish I could just wake up from this nightmare and have everything be okay." You said into your arm that closed off Josh's neck.

He placed a kiss on the side of your head. "I wish that's how the world worked. All we can do now is be hopeful that he'll come around."

You maneuvered your head to meet in front of his. You gave him a small understanding smile, along with a soft peck on his lips. This would've never happened if you told Josh you didn't care what Sam thought. This wouldn't have happened if it weren't for you. And here you both were, standing in the same spot that held the exact moment that your guys' first kiss took place at. That damned kiss was the beginning of the downfall of you and Sam, as dramatic as it sounds. But it was true. Now, holding your eyes with Josh's, you couldn't help but wonder if this was all a mistake.

⊱ ━━━━.⋅ εïз ⋅.━━━━ ⊰

series taglist: @gvfleetwood @sacredjake @aureatopia @myeyehurtz @alexiagx @objectsinspvce @unhappycylinder @spinthehemmo @carbonwritingthroughtime @thecoldwind @ageofsophgvf @fakeplastiqtree @thepritchardscale @gvfpal @light-myluv @raviolilegs @jordierama @alwayskiszka @absolutely--mental

other tags: @ageofhearingloss @mountain-in-springtime @ignite-my-fire @gvfsstardust @jakesguitarsolo @fallonfatality @gold-mines-melting @digitalcalamity @demolitionndann @lipstickitty @lexii-nv-c @joopsworld @ryrybaby @hellowgoodbye @writingcold @stardustcatcher @absolutely--mental @loverleaverslayerbeliever @hippievanfleet

-part eight-

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