Tumgik
#and THAT is still abuse worthy of sympathy and attention
zappedbyzabka · 8 months
Text
Kreese definitely was abusive to all the Cobras and left a mark on them back then but Johnny was always a focus for him from the very start.
22 notes · View notes
dolphin1812 · 1 year
Text
Cosette chapters are always distressing, partly because Hugo writes them well (aside from the Thénardiers). He continues with the idea that Cosette is less than an animal, with drinkers saying things like, “One must needs be a cat to go about the streets without a lantern at this hour!” Instead of a cat, we see that Cosette, a human child, is the one sent out. Additionally, when arguing with a customer over his horse, Mme Thénardier refers to it as a “beast,” but Cosette is the “other beast,” also not given the status of a person. If anything, she’s below the horse, as she’s expected to take the risk of going out into the night and carrying a bucket bigger than she is just to make sure that the horse has water (which is important to the horse’s life, of course, and it’s nice to see a horse be cared for in a novel otherwise filled with horse death, but given that it’s so dark and that it’s a cold winter night, going outside is extremely dangerous to Cosette, a young child who’s probably malnourished and doesn’t have proper clothes). Cosette’s even addressed as “Mademoiselle Dog-lack-name,” further emphasizing her ties to animals over humans and how even within the group of animals, she’s seen as the lowest of them, not worthy of even a name. She’s then called “Mam’selle Toad,” an animal that’s typically looked down on. This dehumanization is horrific, made worse by the fact that she’s so young. However, it’s also very effective in establishing sympathy for Cosette, who we otherwise don’t really see. We haven’t spent that much time with her relative to the other characters (or relative to Napoleon), but we need to care about her, and getting this view of how cruel others are to her - as well as glimpses of her thoughts, which are not at all what a child should be worrying about - makes it very easy to feel pity for her.
Cosette’s thoughts also indicate how frequent these kinds of events are. Hugo says suffering has made her like an “old woman,” and while he’s referring to her appearance and demeanor, it’s evident from what she focuses on as well. Given that she’s eight, we’d expect that she’d think about playing. Instead, her mental energy is dedicated to calculating the amount of water present in the inn. It’s true that aspects of her approach are still child-like. Her anxiety, for instance, and her lies aren’t surprising coming from a child (although they wouldn’t necessarily be shocking from an adult, either). Still, the extent to which this abuse has stolen her childhood is clear. She’s stressed the full night (in addition to being busy, as she’s working even as she worries) over something that even the adults present are barely paying attention to, thinking only about the work she’s expected to do instead of things that might make her happy. 
60 notes · View notes
unwounding · 2 months
Text
This was originally a youtube comment but i'm copy-pasting it here. might edit later
I find the discourse point "just because it shows exploitation doesn't mean it endorses it" facile because it ignores the context in which the art is produced. To put it simply, a piece of art can simultaneously denounce exploitation while perpetuating it. I don't think that there's anything inherently wrong with portraying exploitation in art: exploitation is a part of humanity and is worthy of being explored as much as anything else. The primary consideration should be how that exploitation is depicted.
Take Irreversible by Gaspard Noe, which has an infamously graphic rape scene, so much so that there were audience walkouts. IMO this movie manages to show exploitation and denounce it without perpetuation because the brutality of the rape scene is a blunt depiction of violence against women that's absent in mainstream media and discourse. This is not to say that the depiction of rape and violence against women are non-existent, but rather they don't convey the full dehumanization of the experience because the depiction typically isn't so jarring and is thus consumed as ordinary. Whether they left during or after the film I'm certain most people were able to grasp that (a) Noe doesn't endorse violence and (b) that this form of violence against women is horrific and the viewer feels this horror viscerally.
Contrast this with Sucker Punch. Again, I'd say it's obvious Snyder thinks Exploitation Is Bad but I also question the reasoning behind having female characters in skimpy clothing. What purpose does that serve? And, this is critical, actresses donning skimpy clothing to arouse the male audience and serve as marketing ploys is not only not radical, it is banal. There is no way around that. We live in a world where that is so normal as to be expected, and when simply reproduced becomes another instance of female exploitation without any effect of denouncement. I'd argue that Snyder is disingenuous in saying that the marketing is a bait-and-switch technique because at the end of the day...you have images of women being made sex objects for the sake of consumption. Also note the difference between Snyder's portrayal of harley quinn vs. Yan's. Snyder's Harley Quinn is an exemplar of a character tailored to the male gaze where Yan's is decidedly less objectifying and striking bc it's just not that common. You don't have to take my word for this and should watch the films in sequence because the contrast is sharp. Tbh after learning that Snyder tweeted about this video leaves a funny taste in my mouth and while the viewpoint is expected I'm side-eyeing Mike a little bit.
To really hammer the point home take Nabokov's Lolita as another example. Given that the story is narrated by a protagonist (an abuser, obvs) who is trying to elicit sympathy from the reader it's easy to believe that Nabokov is endorsing his behavior. That being untrue aside, I want to bring attention to what he said about the book's cover: "No girls." illustrators failed the assignment. Check out Zimmer's Covering Lolita, which is an archive of Lolita book covers across several decades and countries where images of coy little girls abound. Kubrick's film poster was a turning point. Heart-shaped sunglasses, red lips, and a lollipop became an iconic depiction and is still so prevalent that the character is frequently seen in the "coquettish" aesthetic. Keep in mind that all this is happening in a cultural context where the sexualization of girls is rampant, and what's ultimately behind this Lolita-as-Seductress image is a 12-year-old girl being repeatedly raped by her stepfather. That truth is elided, however, because the image blends into a larger landscape where it is normal.
1 note · View note
Text
Tumblr media
Day 7: tears
This one is coming a little early today. Its been a week since I started this exploration and there's been so many emotions and feelings each day. Saturday I felt exhausted, I felt done, I didn't want to feel like this anymore and was fighting with my head that we needed to keep going, that this pain and discomfort was temporary. Sunday I felt so anxious in that yoga class and holding onto so many emotions that I've been working through the last however long.
I had feelings of understanding on Sunday. Understanding that I am worthy of love, that I am loved, I felt that love that I receive from so many people. I expressed my understanding and feelings to my friends that day. I didn't cry on Saturday and managed to get a little out on Sunday. I knew there was going to be a big release and I think there will be many more as I continue down this path of healing. Right now I'm laying in my bathroom my head resting on a squishmallow and covered in a small blanket while I hold a seal stuffie. I cried a lot before writing this and I'm shaking as I type.
I felt anxious for the last few hours, thinking I was responsible for someone's own sad emotions. I was worried I had hurt someone I care for and trying to think of how to fix it and make it better. The person never expressed to me that I was the cause of anything they were feeling. As far as I'm aware, I haven't done anything to claim responsibility for my actions and I know that I can't make assumptions, I have to wait until someone tells me something I did or said hurt them.
Growing up, I felt like I was responsible for the emotional well-being of the people around me. I needed to ensure my mother was happy, because if she was happy then the house could be at peace. I had to make sure my twin was happy, because if she wasn't, she might physically hurt herself. I carried that weight on my back to ensure my house was okay. Sometimes my twin would cry and talk about wanting to die, so I would walk us to the library a few miles away because if we were there, then we would be safe. My mom wasn't home in the afternoons or evenings, often I wouldn't see her until bed time so I was the parent.
I remember going to the bathroom to shower and I would sit on my knees hunched over as the water hit my back. I would cry and sob to myself, telling myself that I'm a good person, that I'm a good daughter, that I'm trying so hard, and that all I want to be is to be loved. I still do that from time to time, I remember crying a few months ago just saying out loud that all I want is to be loved. And logically, I know I am loved. There are so many people in my life that love me, but because of how I grew up, it's taken me so long to really understand what that feels like. I'm scared of losing all that I built and I won't be strong enough.
I'm sharing this photo of me crying not because I'm looking for attention or sympathy, though if y'all have pet photos I would be glad to see those. I wanted to show me at my most vulnerable, to show a side of me that I don't let people see. I've always been smiles and radiating energy, I've always tried to be like sunshine, warm, bright, happy. But that not always me, that's a part of me, but I'm also grumpy, I get sad, I get annoyed with client calls, I hate standing in lines, I cry a lot and Im not always strong. Sometimes I just want to be taken care of and I don't want to feel guilty for asking for that.
A friend and I were talking the other day about therapy and life and he had mentioned that what it seems I'm looking for is to be seen. I want my abuse acknowledged, I don't want to have to hide it away and sort of "move on" from it. I hate the idea of saying well that happened, but let's go heal and move forward because I want to sit in that mud and just be sad about it for a bit. I think there's a part of healing that isn't really visible or recognized and that just getting to hold your muddiness and give it space and getting to be sad.
I hated the idea an ex-friend had told me about "suck it up buttercup" because I want to confront my past, I want to look at it and be seen and hold it for a moment so then I can get all the feelings out that I never had the chance to in the past. I don't want people to say, oh Taylor he's so brave he's a survivor look at how amazing he's doing. I don't want to always be strong. I want to be sad, I want to be weak, I want to let my inner child cry so that adult Taylor can grow where he could not previously.
I cried today because I was scared I wasn't a good person, that everything I was working for was going to come crumbling beneath me. I was scared my friends would leave me as some had done before, I was scared that none of this was going to work out. I'm still scared, this is all new territory for me to be so open like this and to put it all out on display. It's so new to think about what a healthy love feels like and to just let myself be vulnerable, visible, and receptive to love. I'm scared as I strengthen my foundation with these new bricks.
0 notes
redphlox · 3 years
Text
Tenko's tears; Touya's wounded inner child
Tumblr media
As I've mentioned before, crying serves various purposes, two of which include emotional regulation and forming social connections. Tears signal "I'm sad and I need help" and usually elicit concern from others. But, for Touya and Tenko, tears didn't fulfill these needs. When Tenko cried, the adults around him tried to distract him from his pain or change how he responded to his abuse instead of defending him or confronting his father Kotaro. They meant well, but in the end it didn't help Tenko and he felt alone. No one validated his pain; he was seen, but he wasn't helped. The same thing happened to Touya, who was seen crying, and crying, and crying, but his parents refused to acknowledge the root cause of his pain because it would mean facing their own mistakes. His tears, his cries for help, never got him the help he needed and never made him feel better.
Even as adults, Dabi and Shigaraki weren't listened to because they didn't display socially acceptable feelings such as sorrow or regret, and they weren't dealing with their trauma in a socially acceptable way, like crying. Shigaraki told Endeavor, in front of Deku and Bakugo, that heroes only hurt their families, but it wasn't until Deku saw a glimpse of Tenko that Deku decided Shigaraki was worth saving because little Tenko’s tears humanized him and made him relatable.
While this is a turning point in the manga, the way it came about insinuates that certain unspoken conditions exist that need to be filled before victimhood can be validated or someone is deemed worthy of help. Not everyone is equal, and not everyone's pain will be good enough in hero society. This warrants the questions the League of Villains keep asking: who are heroes here to save? Who is it that needs saving? Where do you draw the line? Are villains not people too?
This new plot point of Deku being moved by Tenko’s tears also brings into light how isolating and demonizing it is for Dabi not being physically able to cry. He compensates for this – because remember, crying regulates your emotions, and if you can’t cry you turn to other coping mechanisms for self-soothing – by telling himself and others that he doesn’t care about anything or anyone. He copes with his emotions by smiling and grinning, by not getting too attached. He takes an offensive approach through keeping a distance from people by insulting them and being rude. However, his quirk’s link to his emotions betrays him and exposes his true feelings: his flames became hotter after Twice died and his flames turned white while confronting Endeavor. Dabi, despite everything, still cares and feels deeply.
So, how is Dabi supposed to be seen and understood and saved if he can’t prove that he has feelings if he can't cry? Why would he even want to cry, since crying never helped him? All Touya did from the age of four was cry for help, literally, and yet he was ignored and neglected. It wasn't Shigaraki's words that moved Deku, it was the unintended display of emotion through crying, which is something Dabi can't do even if he wanted because his tear ducts are burnt as a result of being so heartbroken over his father not showing up to Sekoto Peak. The irony is ugly and upsetting to witness – overwhelming feelings of abandonment and worthlessness almost killed Dabi ten years ago and now, when the story implies he desperately needs to cry to be seen, he can't, and therefore he's still alone and will continue to be alone.
But wait – he cries tears of blood, doesn’t he?
I think that if he’s caught in a vulnerable place, if the right people (Natsuo) meet him or if he is finally validated and seen and understood (Shouto), those tears of blood would come out and he’d finally be eligible (as gross as that sounds) for salvation, for understanding, for sympathy like Shigaraki. Feelings serve as evidence to society that villains are human too, and Dabi must first be considered a human. It seems that salvation, like the attention Touya received from his father, is conditional. Touya's wounded inner child and status as an abuse survivor will be the ticket to his redemption IF he can be vulnerable and express his pain physically to the younger generation of heroes, because talking about his past hasn't helped and won't help. Even now, as noted in 304, people still weren't sure why he became a villain even though he literally explained why in his pre-recorded broadcast. Dabi, or his inner child, has to show evidence he is still emotionally suffering because his words won't suffice for society or heroes. Honestly, this framing is personally distressing and frustrating because it pushes a bad victim vs good victim mentality, especially in light of Rei commenting that Shouto, who she burnt and forgave her nonetheless, is their family's hero.
Don't get me wrong. Shouto has done nothing wrong to warrant this suffering, and I think it's great that Deku is determined to save everyone within his reach. This makes sense as his role as protagonist. With that said, it's unsettling to me how drastically different he's reacting to Shigaraki compared to how he responded to Dabi by comparing him to Endeavor and implying Dabi is worse for not trying to be better. Before anyone jumps down my throat, I know Deku intervened because he was worried about Shouto, and that Deku is 16 and young. My point is that the narrative and the writing is setting up a problematic view of victims by having the main character nitpick who deserves to be saved based on this societal construct that people must first qualify or prove themselves. Shigaraki shouldn't have had to show his trauma receipts or be relatable for Deku to want to save him. Shigaraki didn’t even expose his inner child on purpose – Deku caught a glimpse of that without Shigaraki’s intention.
Let me say this another way. Imagine if you had to present yourself as sympathetic to a firefighter, an ambulance worker, or a doctor before receiving their help. It would be unprofessional and highly unethical for these professionals to turn you down because you don't fit the image of someone who needs help, someone who's not "sick" enough, whose house isn't burning hot enough, whose injuries aren't "bad" enough. So why do heroes, as a group of public servants, have these unwritten rules and preconceived notions about what a victim looks like? I understand that people are more likely to provide services if you're nice to them (you catch more flies with honey, etc) and that everyone has biases etc, but this isn't a core value of the helping professions or public servants. It's unethical to discriminate and assign varying levels of care based on how someone treats you or others around them. People in need are people in need, and that's that.
As of now, it seems like the manga is on route to support the League's complaints by supplying evidence that their disillusionment with society isn't unfounded - even Twice, who died crying at the hands of a hero part of the older generation, was not considered a person before he was considered a villain. But maybe if he had come across a hero from the younger generation, someone who recognized his tears as human despite his criminal record, he wouldn't have met the fate he did. It seems that the older generation of heroes don't take tears or emotions into account, which is why Tenko and Touya were shrugged off. But the younger generation will go out of their way to help anyone who needs help, but only if they prove themselves or make themselves sympathetic.
356 notes · View notes
lovee-infected · 4 years
Note
I love your characters analyses and I agree a lot with them!My favorite is Kalim and while he's an angel, the way most people go "Dumb innocent baby who is naive to the way of the the world uwu" kinda irks me haha. Yes, he's an airhead most of the time but he's much more perceptive than he looks (he knew about Jamil nature all along) and can use his head and put in hard work when he thinks it matters, aka helping and making other people happy (his dorm uniform and scary outfit story) (part 1)
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
PREACH ANON, PREACH!!! The truth has been spoken 👏👏👏 That was amazing and you almost said anything that I meant to say! Characters and even real people who have the same personality as Kalim are often mischaracterized/misunderstood, mostly because people don't know that kindness isn't equal to stupidity. Almost anything that was needed to be said is already here so I'd just go through some of the details to complete it:
(1) Kindness ≠ Stupidity
Honestly...this isn't just about twst, it's about real life. These days many who are just sweet, generous and caring toward others even as they know that they're being abused because of their kindness, are called naïve and stupid. Look, many times they do realize that not everyone around them are worthy of their kindness, but they'd continue to treat them nicely, because it's in they're nature to be kind nonetheless, and this purity and genuine kindness is the worthiest thing one can ever ask for.
After chapter 4, Kalim did understand that Jamil had never been the person he was thought he was, he didn't even consider Kalim his friend. Jamil is still rejecting him but Kalim doesn't care, he even thanked Jamil after the fairy gala event for dancing with him, because it reminded him of the times when they played as children. Someone like Kalim would never forget anyone's kindness towards him, no matter what happens or how things change through the time. If you think about it, we all need someone like Kalim in our life.
Accept it, no matter who we are or how different our taste in people might be, we'd still appreciate an ally like Kalim. Someone who'd care for you and your problems no matter what it is, even as he can't help he'd try his best to at least make you feel better. He accepts criticism and won't fight you even if you call him useless and dumb (Just like when Jamil blamed him in the end of chapter 4), yet he'd still try to befriend you and do his best to support you through obstacles. This will to help people whom he cares for regardless of what they think of him or how much it may trouble him is an absolute treasure, just how many people can be like Kalim?
(2) Kalim shouldn't be compared to Jamil all the time!
A really common way of mischaracterizing Kalim is by comparing him to Jamil all the time: "Jamil is quiet, Kalim is talkative" "Jamil is cold, Kalim is warm and friendly" "Jamil is talented, Kalim is not" "Jamil is thoughtful and wise, Kalim is careless and stupid"...
I agree that Kalim and Jamil are different in some ways, but it isn't okay if we're going to compare him to Kalim whenever we're talking about him! Do we mention Jade or Floyd whenever we're talking about Azul? Do we compare Vil to Rook everytime we're talking about him? See, Kalim and Jamil are two separate characters. No matter how different or close they are, it isn't okay to consider them as nothing more than opposites! Both Kalim and Jamil have independent personalities amd we we don't have to mention Jamil whenever we want to talk about Kalim! His existence isn't bound to Jamil's and he's got a lot we can talk about other than his relationship/differences with Jamil.
(3) His generosity tells us a lot
You may wonder, why is he so generous anyway? Giving up on golden peacocks and diamond stones for friends and even strangers without caring about the financial loss isn't such an easy thing to do. Well let's imagine being on Kalim's shoes for a second:
You come from an unbelievably rich family, and ever since you can remember everyone around you has been treating you like a prince because of your father's status and money. Everyone around you is supposed to respect and treat you like a royaland you can buy anything you can ever wish for, you've got no financial boundaries. But on the other hand, you know that almost everything you've got around you is because of money: fame, wealth and many of your friends.
And if you one day lose all the money you'd once got, what is going to happen to you? What should you rely on? Who will ever even care if you're alive or not if the money that held all of your power and clout is gone? Also, even as he's rich, there are still things that he couldn't ever buy with money. He did say that sometimes he just feels so alone several times, then quickly changed the topic into something interesting and bright. Maybe he does want people to know that he as well sometimes goes through the pain and loneliness, but doesn't want it to seem to dramatic therefore he'd just quickly mention it to let it off his chest, then starts to talk about something else.
That's much and less of the reason behind Kalim's personality, he wants to use his money and attitude to gain what he can't buy with money: Friends. That's right, many of his friends might already be around him just for money, right? But it doesn't matter, he's got enough of money to keep them all satisfied. And if satisfying them is all it takes to keep his friends around him, he's all fine with it. He doesn't mind hoe expensive it might be, as long as he'll get to have nice friends he cares for around him he's alright.
THis generosity with money has found his way to his personality and attitude as well. His nature gravitates him into trying his best to help people out with all he's got. Kalim on his own is one that can get to have hid problems solved easily, there's always someone there to do it for him so he never needs to worry about anything. Perhaps he wants others around him to feel the same? If he had someone to take care of him whenever he needed to, then everyone else as well deserve to be helped out through difficulties just like Kalim was.
(4) We should all try and see through him!
Lets take a look at Kalim's background: Growing up with legit LOTS of siblings, he surely didn't get the attention and family love he deserved to have. Have you ever considered why Jamil was always so important to him while he could've been this close to any of his brothers? Well, that might be because none of his family members wasn't ever even close to being that close to him. Jamil isn't his brother, but Kalim does consider him his brother and best friend, which is somehow showing that even his own family haven't done as much as Jamil has done for him. He could've been poisoned or assassinated at any second, how does it feel growing up in an environment where you know many people already want you dead? Also, have you considered just how insecure and skeptical he coul've became because of having such a fearful past? At this point, someone wit his background might not even dare talk to any of other students let alone making friends with them! Almost any of us could've had trust issues if we'd grown up in the same environment as him!
Come to think of it, you'll see that Kalim is also pretty similar to the well-known hero Naruto! Naruto used to be looked down on because of his lack of ability yet he never gave up, he had a stunning will to turn his enemies into friends, he was considering and never gave up on Sasuke no matter how many times he hurt and turned his back on Naruto, and he never gave up on his goal no matter how many times he lost.
Kalim as well still has a lot to learn to improve and become a stronger magician, and he has strated to work his best and try to improve! It might not happen as fast as we may expect, but someday, maybe he as well would be strong enough for Jamil to be considered his rival and friend.
Another interesting fact to point out is their sense of humor, both Narto and Kalim can be careless at the time and sometimes mess up, and they also have a thing for sometimes laughing at their friends' mistakes (Not in an offensive way) all though they're the one to mess up most of the time. Like the times Kalim laughed at how bad Ace and Deuce's performance was, then decided to teach them how to dance with the help of Jamil.
Just would've been improved much faster if his goal was to be a great magician, but the main difference between Kalim and Naruto are thirs goals. Becoming a great ninja was Naruto's biggest goal, while Kalim's greatest goal is to be a good and supportive friend for everyone around him. Keep something in mind about Scarabia: It's true that Jamil, the vice dorm leader is in charge of most of the tasks and managements; but Kalim's presence is just as necessary for the students! Students need someone understand them, listen to their messenge and care to solve their problems like a friend! With Kalim's sympathy and Jamil's management, Scarabia students would have the chance to improve their best for the sake of their dorm and their very own future. (Though there needs to be some changes, Kalim should be a little more serious in general and Jamil needs to be more considering, but if Kalim and Jamil learn to work as a team Scarabia would stand higher than many of other dorms!)
Tumblr media
For real, this is a school of villains and Kalim is much of a great exception to be in this school. He's legit the nicest character in the game and even MC had plenty of great memories with him back in the Chapter 4. This precious boy doesn't deserve to be called stupid or naïve while all he's been doing so far was to bring everyone including us the players a wonderful time and sweet memories...we need to understand him much better💔
505 notes · View notes
wingsfreedom · 3 years
Text
Azula the Scapegoat
Tumblr media Tumblr media
I know that Gene Yang is one of those Zuko stans who have massive persecution-complex, which is a writing style that grossing me out because of how much disservice and cheap storytelling it does just to milk more sympathy for Zuko's character.
With that out of the way, let's get into the topic:
"She was born lucky and you were lucky to be born." (The line Ozai's spoke to spite his wife, apparently)
But the ironic thing here is that Ozai never called Zuko "lucky to be born" for the possibility of being a nonbender only but also (by discarding the harsh tone and word play here) for the fact that Zuko had people who shield him from Ozai's disappointment, people who want to give him time and a chance. This was Zuko's luck, his luck was that he's unconditionally accepted by everyone except Ozai. But no matter, he is still firstborn firebender son.
Azula, on the other hand, never received this kind of protection despite she was reasonably the closest child to be casted away, because Ozai married for a reason and he will not tolerate two failed experiments (nonbenders) nor he would submit to begging twice. Azula was obviously a child he pushed to have too (giving the naming).
He literally called Azula lucky to not to be casted away by him because she happened to meet his condition! (something she didn't choose to be born with, mind you). So the fact she was kept at all was purely conditional on his part. This time, no one interfered for lucky Azula to show her that she has value as a person other than her firebending/power, that she's still worth something other than being better than Zuko and his replacement, not even her mother, instead Ursa was a complicit in this treatment and reinforced these ideas. Azula was Ozai's, and no one dared or pay enough attention to protect her from him.
You think it's not in-line with TheSearch!Ozai who so casually spitted the line above to his son to show his daughter the letter her mother wrote where she admitted that she considers Azula's existence as a pain that worth nothing? TheSearch!Ozai who married under the supervision of his father for the purpose of producing strong benders who he would eventually show off to prove why he is worthy of the throne ("would you show Grandfather the new firebending moves you demonstrate to me?"), who stays up every night training firebending, who is ambitious, can't he possibly train this child since a young age and harshly so?
I'm not playing "who was abused more" pointless game, my point is whether you met the condition or not the core of the issue is still unresolved and hurtful for both kids self-esteem and image. Both of their experiences are valid.
Yet the comic never presented like it should at all, instead it encourages you to hate Azula for this and present it as though this "luck" has tained her with an "original sin" of sorts:
Tumblr media Tumblr media
All because of her exceptional firebending and having Zuko's abusive father's "favor".
Tumblr media
This is especially striking when you compare this to baby Ozai picture in the show and how the narrative used this as a proof that he was pure and sinless once and that "he's a human being" and "[can] become good again" despite he was about to raze the world on fire, despite he was the one who set Zuko on fire.
But you know, maybe because Ozai, unlike Azula, doesn't challenge anyone perspective. (Not "the-right-thing-was-all-he-ever-did" Iroh, not good-mother-&-perfect-victim Ursa, and more importantly not to be a theat to Zuko's character, his redemption and victim spotlight statu.) Azula is also a character with the least amount of agency, therefore this makes her at most exposure of vilifying.
I know Azula wasn't the best sister and she hurt Zuko many times, but to go this far? This is nothing short than a fanboy's envy and a double-standards writing style that didn't only lessened the affect of Zuko's trauma to make him look like someone with persecution complex but also removed depth in the siblings relationship since the show suggested their bond started friendly.
More proof? Azula Charlotte's so-called "development" in the nonsensical plot of the followed-up Smoke & Shadow comic was centered on her starting to become 'affectionate' sister toward Zuko and accepting that the throne is his than anything to do with Azula's actual struggles or growth as a person (her mirror scene conflic was thrown aside completely in favor of that) hence her so-called development was forced without any reasonable bulid up behind it, if any at all :
Tumblr media
(since Azula was nothing short of a fanservice and a plot-function for Zuko's ever repeated conflic)
This is not Yang exclusive thing only, Aaron Ehasz has the same vision too except the arc he laid out has much more realistic set-up for Azula's eventual redemption submission to Zuko instead of focusing on her growth as a person. And Bryke? When they were asked if Azula is truly evil or not (a pointless question for Avatar) their brains automatically translated the question into "why Azula is mean to her brother?"
Azula might be the golden child in-universe, but she's the scapegoat of this fandom.
203 notes · View notes
guiltycorp · 4 years
Text
a comprehensive bullet point list of what i love about luo binghe/shen qingqiu!
 it’s problematic Luo Binghe first experienced attraction to his martial teacher when he was 14 a martial teacher who had been severely abusing him for several years by that time! who then suddenly became nice, betrayed him & separated from him (abyss), grew distant, was nice again, separated again (died), was distant and then finally nice again sounds like a cycle of abuse, doesn’t it? just because Shen Qingqiu didn’t mean for it and wasn’t even in control for much of it doesn’t change the effect it had on Binghe there is little wonder why (outside of BL genre structure) Binghe remained obsessed with his shizun throughout puberty and into his adulthood - after all that really is how those carrot-stick relationships work for children without proper support networks later because of plot shenanigans Shen Qingqiu timeskips and becomes roughly the same age as his former student, but their teacher-student dynamic remains firmly in place, with Shen Qingqiu making comparisons to schoolgirls in his mind, often patronizingly thinking of Binghe as a child as well as appreciating his more childish and subservient behaviour   while they don’t always fit this mold, their mutual kink is clear and it is very much not about being equal partners in return, Shen Qingqiu almost always allows physical violence and unsubtle manipulations from his husband-disciple out of lingering guilt and sympathy, and that is also kind of ehhh...
they both love each other for the wrong reasons this one could be argued with! but Binghe loves Shen Qingqiu because of the blatant favoritism during his student years and later because of the sacrifices Shen Qingqiu went through for him  Shen Qingqiu was a handsome and young-looking authority figure who abruptly changed his behaviour, making Binghe believe that perhaps he was worthy of love after all -- his betrayal only meant that Binghe was all the more desperate to prove himself to that same person again (after all, it worked once before!) because that would mean that he did have value after all who else could Binghe truly fall for? his childhood friend had been naive and dragged him into trouble on several accounts and he met his other ‘wives’ too late when there was no real opportunity for intimacy so, his romantic interest in his teacher arouse from his insecurity and hormonal drive (i am assuming that shizun basically looked like Monica Belucci in Malena to him)  meanwhile! Shen Qingqiu did all those nice things at first out of self-preservation and then fully out of guilt he felt for pushing his loyal student into the abyss, not out of all-encompassing devotion like Binghe thought there is no doubt that he came to love Binghe as a faithful student and extraordinarily good house-servant (especially in contrast to his original blackened counterpart), but he seemed way more concerned about making them ‘even’ somehow  and he never showed any obvious sexual or romantic interest in Luo Binghe either! remaining ambivalent both when loomed over, first kissed, pressed up to him in a tight coffin etc; it actually isn’t very clear in the novel whether Shen Qingqiu accepted their romantic relationship only after he agreed to it out of pity or if he had been just THAT repressed and didn’t realize what his feelings of admiration for the protagonist & feelings of responsibility for a student really were 
both can’t leave the relationship for the wrong reasons obviously, Luo Binghe craves his shizun’s attention, both as a teacher and as a husband he still doesn’t really have any other people in his life even more so than before (at least he used to have his demonic servants and Huan Hua Palace people to talk to), so even if he realized they needed more boundaries or simply more out of life he wouldn’t be able to change anything since validation from his teacher is his major addiction and any conflict they might have would just feel like a normal part of their routine after which they would guiltily get back together and Shen Qingqiu couldn’t possibly betray his student by leaving AGAIN, and even if he did he would expect to be chased and dragged back also, their marriage allows Shen Qingqiu to stagnate in his preferred laziness, a setup too comfortable to risk! 
they still somehow manage to be good for each other all that said!! they make each other happy in their own way, perhaps exactly because they are very flawed characters without some serious character development and growth they couldn’t possibly maintain any meaningful and intimate relations with anyone else and this is why i like this relationship so much, it’s just a realistic portrayal of how it goes sometimes! only in this instance both of them are so extremely powerful and well-off that there’s little chance of their relationship imploding like most of these teacher-student marriages do even if Binghe were to learn that his shizun is a transmigrator... at most it would make him doubt himself and his own value since he internalized ‘suffering to get stronger‘ specifically because of the abuse he endured, and if none of that abuse actually wilfully came from his beloved then what was the reason for his suffering? he would also probably realize that a lot of his shizun’s motivations weren’t out of concern for him, but i imagine Shan Qingqiu would be able to mollify him with just one sentence or even a question like ‘what are you, an idiot?’ because Binghe always thinks the best of him they are also both extremely grateful to each other, making them a surprisingly strong and devoted couple   
112 notes · View notes
whumpingcrow · 3 years
Text
Pt. 22 "It Takes A Village"
CW: whump aftermath, discussion of past abuse, past noncon, panic attack, starvation/whumpee not being allowed to eat, dehumanization, tourrettes/ticcing, death mention, slightly clueless caretaker, whumpee mistaking friendliness for intimacy, drugs/alcohol (let me know if I missed anything!)
Tyson looked annoyed with Elias by the end of the meal. He sighed heavily when he saw that Elias hadn't touched his food, glanced over at him disdainfully as he took his plate away and brought it to the kitchen. Elias could've crumbled at that. He knew he wasn't supposed to eat, especially not at the table with others. August had gotten so mad at him for thinking he was worthy of that, made sure that when he ate it was only when August forced him to, and when he was on the cold basement floor, so hungry he thought he would die. Elias couldn't remember when or why that began, just like with all of the other twisted rules, he just knew that it was better to just obey, to do whatever August wanted so that there wouldn't be any added, unnecessary pain for being bad. He learned quickly that submitting to the torture at the beginning was so much easier than fighting against it and suffering through the originally planned pain plus whatever August saw as a just punishment for his disobedience.
So the entire dinner he thought he was doing good, being so quiet and only speaking when he was asked to and not touching the food that he wasn't deserving of and sitting pretty. It's not that he didn't know he was with Tyson, it had just become so normal to him that he really couldn't imagine doing anything else, even though it caused him tremendous turmoil. And then, after all that effort, Tyson still looked at him like he was pathetic and upsetting.
Allen must've picked up on his anxiety, because he stood up from the table and tapped Elias's shoulder in the least invasive way he could. "I'm going to have a cigarette, would you like to join me?"
Elias took a shaking breath of relief, nodding his head. He followed Allen outside to the porch, watched as he sank down into a chair. He wished so badly he was allowed to kneel here, it would give him some sense of normalcy. Instead he opted for standing a good distance away from Allen, only stepping forward a bit to grab the cigarette offered to him. His teeth were chattering, he wasn't sure if he was shivering because of the cold or his anxiety, but it made him fumble with the lighter for a few seconds. When his frail, trembling fingers wouldn't light it, he let out a hopeless, defeated whine.
"Here, let me help, love," Allen offered, standing up and taking the lighter from him. Elias couldn't help but stare wide eyed at him as he lit up for him, both of their faces glowing an orange hue from the small flame.
"Uh...thank you," he whispered after a drag. Allen was still standing up with him, smoking his own cigarette and looking past him, at the window. Elias was trying to figure out if he was standing so close because he wanted something, or if he just happened to be less than a foot away. He wondered if he was imagining the fond look on his face when he took the lighter from him, if Allen called him "love" in a friendly way or if it was affection. It made his chest fluttery to think about, and he was confused at the tears in his eyes.
"You alright, Elias?" Allen asked softly. "You're shaking. What's up, pal?"
Elias looked up at him, ticcing as he tried to hold eye contact. "C...can I ask you again?" He whimpered.
Allen seemed to know immediately what he was referring to, and he nodded at him with a pleased, possibly proud, grin.
"What do you want?" This time it came out a little more sure, less broken, than the first time, and Allen's face softened into a smile, one that Elias had seen on people right before they praised him. His lips curled up in the same way other's usually did before they would say "Good boy," or "tres bien". Elias felt a small weight lift from his shoulders, he'd finally done something right!
"I'm happy just smoking and hanging out with you. That's what I want."
Elias felt his face flush, an incredibly grateful, almost elated, smile on his face. Someone was happy just to hang out with him. Happy. "Ok. Thank you."
Allen debated asking if Elias wanted anything, but he was sure it would be just as bad as the first time, tears and trembling and the works. So instead he reached out and playfully ruffled Elias's hair just a little. Elias flinched at the movement initially, but then he was quick to correct himself and instead pressed against the hand in his hair eagerly. He was smiling softly at the touch, eyes fluttering closed.
Allen couldn't help but wonder if this was how he had been when he finally escaped August, if he was so broken he just went weak at simple, friendly touches. Surely not, Leo was adamant right from the beginning with giving him all the physical attention he needed, and Allen didn't feel so desperate for gentle touch once he was back in Leo's arms. Then again, he wasn't in August's claws for 10 months. He felt a horrible, gnawing sympathy in his chest when he thought of the toll that would take, 10 months of punishment, of being toyed with physically and mentally, treated like nothing, less than nothing.
He took a half step forward, dropping his hand from Elias's head to the nape of his neck. "I'm so sorry you had to go through all of that," he muttered, "I know h-how awful August can be, I'm sorry."
Elias tensed up at the name, pulling the cigarette close to his body, as if he thought the tiny cherry glowing orange at the end would warm him up. "I don't...I don't understand how you can be so normal now. I feel utterly ruined." As he spoke, he couldn't help but lean toward Allen more, the hand on his shoulder keeping him steady. "I feel like I don't even remember who I was before."
Allen shook his head, then, with a bit of hesitation, he pulled Elias close against his chest to comfort him. "I know it seems really hard right now, but it will heal. I promise."
Elias found himself sinking into his arms, melting completely against Allen's body, closing his eyes tightly. He was overwhelmed by the kindness Allen was showing him, how gentle and pleasant he was being. He couldn't get close enough to him, couldn't bury himself deep into his touch enough to really be satisfied, he needed more and more and more, he needed pressure and warmth and suffocating, constant touch, and he was slightly ashamed at the desperate whine that he let out when he realized he might never get that, might never be satisfied.
"You're ok," Allen said in response, "I've got you, Eli. It's ok." He stroked his hair back gently, felt the way he was trembling underneath him. So fragile, breakable, and yet his fingers were tightly grabbing his shirt, aching to be closer.
"It's s-so hard...I c...can't..."
"Shh, Elias. Just breathe, no one's gonna let anything happen to you." He held him close, rocking him side to side, refusing to be the first person to let go. Elias needed this, he could feel it in the way he pushed into him, hear it in his broken, watery voice.
The door opened behind them, and Elias flinched away from Allen like he knew he wasn't supposed to be that close. He looked up at Tyson, his hands shaking and his face pale. "I...we were just-"
"It's ok, love. I was just checking on you." He looked them both over, could see the obvious exhaustion on Allen's face. Tyson often felt bad for sticking them in the same room together, was worried that seeing Elias so familiarly damaged would set Allen off again, would make him lose all the progress he'd been working so hard on. "We were gonna settle down inside. Wanna come?"
Elias instantly agreed, of course, reaching forward to grab Tyson's wrist, like he was afraid he would get lost if he wasn't holding onto someone. Allen followed close behind, collapsing on the couch next to Leo as he came in. His body felt heavy with pity for Elias, especially when his tiny voice asked Tyson if it was ok for him to use the restroom. If it was ok. He had to bite back a groan at how pathetic that was.
"You alright?" Leo asked him, hand on his knee. It was times like this that reminded him how lucky he was to be with Leo; the psychiatrist in him always picked up on when something was wrong, when things were taking a toll on Allen, so he never had to mention it on his own.
"I'm worried about him," he admitted, "I mean, you saw him, the poor kid is...broken." He shook his head sadly, and Leo let out a soft sigh. He didn't protest though, because Allen was right. Tyson began to chew on his lip nervously. "I'm more worried August might come back." This time when he spoke, he dropped his voice to a low mumble. Both Leo and Tyson tensed incredibly at the idea, but no one objected.
"You don't really think that...?" Tyson finally said, shaking his head. His voice was on the edge of begging, pleading for Allen to take the words back.
"I-I mean, how many times did I end up back with him? How many times did we think it was over and he just kept coming back?" His voice was nervous, but he was able to cover it for the most part with his genuine concern. "And he was ballsy enough to come back after killing him, then took him out of the fucking country for almost a year-"
Elias couldn't hold himself up on his own, he had collapsed against the wall with his arms wrapped tightly around himself. August was coming back? Elias would be so easy to find, in the same place as last time. Suddenly he couldn't swallow, his throat felt constricted and dry. He could only think, as their conversation continued with how likely August was to return, was, oh god he's going to kill me! I ran away, I've been gone for so long, he's going to be so angry! Until he couldn't hear anything else, not even Tyson's voice as he stood in front of him, asking him if he was ok. He finally got his voice back, just as a whisper though.
"D...don't let him ta-take me.." he wheezed, pushing himself closer against the wall. "Please Tyson, I c-can't go back! I can't!"
"I'm not going to let anyone touch you, my love," Tyson assured him, hands hesitating over his arms, unsure if he was alright to touch in his panicked state, "no one's coming to take you. I won't let that happen." He wasn't sure if Elias had even heard him, he was still rigid where he stood, his breathing frenetic and labored. His eyes were darting around the room in a panic, like he was looking for something that could hurt him. Or probably someone, rather.
Allen was murmuring apologies, he didn't know Elias was listening in the hall! But no one was really listening to him too much, too concerned with Elias. Rightfully so, because now he was fighting Tyson's hands away from him, trying to escape the comforting touch that only seemed threatening when they were accompanied by Tyson's rushed voice and pressured movements.
"Please!" He shrieked, covering his face with his shaking hands, horrified beyond belief. "I-I'll be good! I swear! Ple-ease don't ma-make me go back!"
"Eli, you are good!" Tyson tried to convince him. "You're gonna be ok, I'm not gonna let you go anywhere. You're safe."
Allen watched the panic ensue, his chest heavy with guilt. He knew how he could calm Elias down (they all secretly did, but none of them wanted to say the words that he so desperately needed to hear), and he wanted to help all he could, but he didn't know if getting in between him and Tyson would change anything. He'd done enough anyways. But it became harder to listen to when Elias sunk to the floor in a mess of tears and hard sobbing, screaming for Tyson to please forgive him. With a huff, Allen pushed himself off of the couch and walked up to the messy scene slowly.
"Can...can I help?" He asked Tyson, voice feather soft and nervous that he was overstepping. Tyson threw him an exhausted look, then nodded his head at him. Allen sat down on the ground next to Elias, sighing heavily before he started speaking. "Hey, Eli. Listen, sweetheart," the nickname tasted bitter in his mouth, but Elias did perk up a little, looking up at him with tears pooling in his eyes. "There. There you go, hi."
Tyson was watching them with interest and vague hope, Elias was slowly inching his way away from the wall. Tyson had held off using that nickname, Allen had once told him that it was somewhat of a trademark for August, that it bothered him to be called it after what he'd been through. It was tainted, would never mean the same thing as it once did, would never be just an innocent pet name, ever again. Not when it was usually accompanied by a crazed, hungry look in August's eyes and Allen's blood on his hands. Tyson wondered if it bothered Allen to use it on Elias.
"Listen here, ok? Be nice and quiet so you can listen." He didn't like the sternness in his voice or the language he was using to try and sound as much like August as he could stomach, but Elias was nodding along mindlessly to the words, his sobs came to a slow stop until he was only sniffling and hiccuping. "Good. You're doing so well here, Eli. Behaving incredibly. We're not gonna send you away or let anyone hurt you because you've been very good. You have to calm down and believe us."
Elias took a tiny, shaky breath, leaning toward Allen with his lip caught in his teeth. He looked fairly fear dazed, like he wasn't completely sure who was speaking to him, but he had calmed down significantly. "I...August..?"
"No, Eli," Allen murmured, almost scolding, "no, sweetheart. Just Tyson, Leo, and me. Ok? No August."
"No August." He repeated, almost like he was reassuring himself. Allen nodded, grabbing his shoulder gently and stroking him with his thumb. "N-no August."
"That's right." He said this with a smile, nodding along with him. "Very good. See? Nothing to worry about."
Elias then looked up at Tyson, his face twitching into a small frown again, his bottom lip trembling as he tried not to cry. "I'm sorry." He choked out, voice breaking painfully.
"No, baby, you've got nothing to be sorry for. Are you ok now?" As a response, Elias crawled forward and buried himself into Tyson's arms, hiding his face against his chest as he did. "It's ok, I've got you. I'm here, angel."
"O...ok." he sniffled a few more times, then pushed himself off of Tyson and sat upright, looking up pitifully at the others. Tyson huffed at him, at the soft and frightened roundness to his eyes, his nose and cheeks a soft pink from being breathless and worked up, his pale hair falling in messy waves across his face. Tyson couldn't help but reach out and touch him again, his fingertips brushing against Elias's cheek.
When he flinched away, Tyson almost retracted his hand, apology already on his lips like a bullet in a loaded gun, but Elias quickly corrected himself and pressed his face longingly into Tyson's warm palm, looking up at him still. The look in his eyes said "I'm sorry, you can touch me! See, please keep touching me." And Tyson was frozen at the obvious desperation, at how vulnerable the look on his face made him seem. But then he couldn't help the fondness that overtook him the longer he looked at his Elias, melting against his touch the same way hard candy melts against a tongue. So he pulled him closer, holding his face tenderly as he rested his cheek against Elias's head.
"I've got you," he whispered one final time, but this time it was to tell himself, to reassure himself that Elias was back with him, safe and sound in his arms, not trapped a world away in pain and in danger and all alone. No, he was here, in shambles and hurting and scared, but here nonetheless.
After what Allen had said about August returning, though, Tyson was afraid that Elias wouldn't be here for long.
10 notes · View notes
shimurah · 4 years
Text
shigaraki and himiko, quirks and repression and its hero society representation.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
more under
Himiko's quirk is both a depiction of her inner repression and the drive of it. An ability that grants her power to take the appearance ( & quirk ) of someone who is not her by absorbing their blood. In a society with standards on what is and what isn't a good 'bad' quirk, her quirk made her an abomination. A demon. the irony in what criteria the quirks must uphold; take a look at the praise and respect UA students with violent quirks get. Addressing problems is not the hero society's way, as we've seen multiple times. Instead, they continue cycles and legacies of deliberate ignorance.
Forced to put a mask on and live the life of someone who, by all means, is not Himiko has its similarity with her quirk. That's what makes it so fascinating; the knowledge that even as she was living through the repression, she was still firmly connected with it. at the same time, she's required to conform to her circumstances, making her need specific knowledge to achieve that state.
To transform and perform her character well, Himiko puts on a different mask and adapts her idiosyncrasies according to who she is portraying. She keeps playing and playing the role until her mask slips and becomes pieces.
Tumblr media
On the other hand, tomura's quirk is about those hands. Those hands that can help, & at the same time, can destroy the lives with one touch. His childhood, as well as present life, reflects that idea.
In the shimura household, the hands that could have warmed him and ceased his pain are the hands that push tenko towards his destruction. When hands reach out, they become the opposite of what saving should be, shoving him towards misery and violence.
Tumblr media
Both of their quirks evolve in the MVA arc. It's incredibly noteworthy that Tomura had been restlessly fighting for about a month and then is met with another deal of hardships. He successfully evolves his quirk as his memory & feelings of repression fade. Very similar to Himiko acquiring knowledge and skills at pair with trained soldiers in more or less two years on the run.
Her abilities grow and keep growing as she isn't repressing her quirk. That is how, in a short period, they were both able to see such results. Repression got them to nowhere—quite a depiction of slowly dying.
Tumblr media
Living a normal life where one's repression is the driving force is eventually death. It proves that they don't need a normal life to live. There is no happiness in their repression; the narrative doesn't reward them for it. 
Yet, at the same time, there's a shadow of punishment in the depiction. Not repressing and living by the standards makes them villainous. That's what message it sends when the only characters willing to live by their own 'lifestyles' are the ones getting dehumanized and abominated for it. It shouldn't be so. Not when there's a big point that this restrain of themselves leads to breaking, decaying, & death.
Tumblr media
The core of himiko's quirk is easily divided into two parts: the blood spill and the performance. The blood spill is something unavoidable; something the play cannot take place without. It is essential. The performance by itself explains pretty much. Described both as the act of portraying a character and an accomplished deed. Looking at Himiko's reasons throughout her life: the first and most notorious show was the act as a "normal person." We know the motives; we know the repression. She played the role of the good, average girl in the hero society. To put on that act, she didn't need to hurt anybody but herself. It results in an eventual breakdown and charge on Saito, which leads to a homeless criminal's life on the run.
Tomura holds destruction. He can effortlessly destroy countless lives. It's not all that is to him, of course. Though he is the very embodiment of destruction itself, he doesn't lack compassion or humanity. He has plenty. The ordeal in one possessing the phenomenality of destruction and salvation in both hands, the must of making the decision.
Tomura chooses to offer his sympathy and companionship to the league, creating an environment like a home. He is perfectly capable of more than destruction, and the occasions where he makes the judgment of it, are always times where his hand is forced. As a child, he lashes back at his abuser. Currently, not much has changed.
The hero society, a performance?
It places its heroes on ranks, creating power-hungry beasts like endeavour. This career is not inherently wrong. The progression from where it originated to where it's sitting now is. One choosing to be a hero for all reasons but being a savior. Of course, that's not the entire hero population but the numbers are concerning. The ranking is also wrong because it guides the citizens to place all of their faith in the top heroes and especially in the top hero. By placing their absolute faith in them, the citizens lose their sense of helping one another. The heroes themselves are just that. People. 
It's been admitted that they can't save everyone, that's not something they can be blamed upon. What they can be on, though, is their performance. The show of being the "guardians of the society," the show of everyone having a chance at saving. That's false by all existent means; sometimes they simply can't save everyone. Sometimes they choose not to out of plain prejudice.
"Guardians of the society" brings many questions. What are guardians supposed to be? If a "guardian" is a savior, then who do they save (serve?) ? The society, yes, but who IS the society? Are humans who don't fit said society's criteria even humans in the eyes of the guardians themselves?
Like Tomura's ability, the guardians can do both destroy or save. It all comes down to their decision. We've seen them capable of saving Eri, the representation of what a good victim should do / be. We've also witnessed them time and time again their treatment of the “dark side” of victims.
This arc is centered around this. Hawks & Jin. Ochako & Himiko. Deku & Tomura.
Tumblr media
Hawks killing Jin, in spite of him "having given Jin a choice" which Jin "refused to take" leaving Hawks, a privileged cop, no choice but to act. Hawks reason is simple, it's for the well-known greater good. This is what Ochako touches on in the recent chapter; for saving people she won't hesitate to take out what's in her way. Then there's Deku who had a special note on his an intense need to save people, yes, in spite of his common sense.
This, again, raises questions. If Ochako is so driven by her desire to save people, who are those people? Who fits her criteria, who does she see as a human? What is Deku's “common sense” referring to? They want to save everyone they can, is ‘everyone’ truly everyone?
Is this a foreshadowing for what is to come? What will the characters this arc had brought great attention to their respective passion involving saving do in the face of two characters that are quite literally walking representations of the hero society's wrongs?
There is a chance it will go the same way as Hawks - Jin. Even if it doesn't occur now, it could be laying the ground for it to walk. At the best, they realize they are people, too, worthy of salvation and they attempt to give a hand. At worst, the hand is given in hawks style which is not really giving a hand and ends in tragedy.
59 notes · View notes
thorne93 · 4 years
Text
The Stars Made Us (Part 7)
Prompt: In this world, you’re one of the “lucky” ones who got a soulmate, but what if the universe gives you more than you bargained for?
(Prompt challenge – You live in a world where your soulmate can write on their skin and you will get the writing on your own and vice versa. Where they can wash away the ink on their own skin, however, the writing is forever scarred onto your skin until you meet face to face)
Word Count: 2438
Warnings: angst and language throughout
Notes: This was supposed to be for @sorryimacrapwriter​​​​  and their challenge like a year ago, I think? I still loved the prompt though and have been working on this story for quite some time. This aesthetic was made by @dontshootmespence​​​​, thank you so much! Beta’d by @like-a-bag-of-potatoes​​​​, couldn’t have done it without you, as well as @carryonmyswansong​​​​ and @arrow-guy​​​​ and @mrs-dragneel-stark-solo​​​​
Tumblr media
~~~~~~~~~~~
Also, I’ve never really liked the whole soulmate AU thing idea, but this felt so right and it was amazing to write. I hope y’all love it too!!
The next morning, you were about to meet Hank after the routine you’d set up when you saw Charles make his way towards the alcohol in the study. 
“No,” you said sternly, following him in and taking the bottle from him. “No alcohol before noon.” 
“I beg your pardon? This is my house. You are a guest here, and if I want to drink from sun up to sun down I bloody will,” he said, anger clear in his tone and frown as his eyes raked your form.
“Just until noon,” you repeated calmly. “Surely your serum will hold out until then? Why don’t you go set up a game of chess and I’ll be in the library to meet you shortly.” 
“If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were trying to distract me,” he noted, his face a mask of humor. 
“Good thing you don’t know any better,” you teased with a tight smile. “Please? I know it’s a passion of yours and I’ve always wanted to play.”
“Wait, you’ve never played chess?”
You shook your head, innocence wrapping your face and gesture. “No.”
“Why not? Hasn’t everyone?” 
“I was much more of a gin rummy kind of girl,” you explained. 
“Ah, I see. Not in my wheelhouse but I could give that a go,” he offered. 
“I’d love to show you… So, uh, off to the library then?” you asked. 
He smiled and laughed. “Yes, I suppose we are meeting in there. Five minutes?” 
“Sounds perfect,” you said with a smile. 
He swept around you and as soon as he was out of sight you broke out into a sprint to find Hank.
“Hey, where’d you disappear to? I’ve started on extracting the--”
“I can’t help. Not this morning.”
“What? Why not?” 
“Charles was going to start drinking and the only thing I could think of to divert his attention was a game of chess so… we’re playing chess.” 
His eyebrows shot up. “So while I’m in here, you’re going to be playing a game?” 
“I know, I’m sorry, but you want him to get better right? Maybe it’s best he has some company with humans rather than with a glass and a needle.”
Hank’s face fell. 
“I’m sorry, Hank, I know you’re doing the best you can. I just… We need to keep him focused and away from the alcohol. Think you can work on this without me?” 
“Yeah, I’ll do my best,” he said, a touch of disappointment in his tone. 
“Thanks, you’re the best. I’ll try to be back as fast as I can.”
“Don’t worry about it,” he sadly replied. “Just… go keep him company.” 
An expression of sad sympathy colored your face. All you did was nod before dashing off to the library. Charles was sitting on the right side, a small table set up with chess as he sat there staring at the board. 
You were surprised at how your heart felt every time you laid eyes on him. Even in his worst state, this man made you feel… grounded. It was as if you were walking around half-empty, then you got close to him and everything felt right with the world. Even if he was drug and alcohol dependent and a bit of an asshole, just being in his presence, everything was okay.
You walked in and sat down across from him, honestly a little nervous. Knowing this man through a screen was one thing, but sitting down across from him, it was an entirely different feeling. A different dynamic, especially since it had been a year since you’d even spoken. 
How much had he changed? How had you changed? Talking every day with one person, you knew what to expect. He was in grad school, you were in residency. He was working towards teaching, you were dealing with patients. It was a no brainer. You swapped stories of graduations, accolades, promotions, and victories. What stories would you swap now? How his adopted sibling had abandoned him, his spine neglecting his ability to walk, his school ripped away from him, not a friend in the world except the two people in this mansion with him. What kind of stories would those be?
“Alright,” you started cheerily, “how do we play?”
“So you’ve really never played?” he asked with a bemused grin. 
“No. I started to learn the rules once, from my uncle, but the idea of losing pieces just to win an endgame... “You shook your head. “It seems barbaric.” 
He laughed gently. “There’s nothing barbaric about it. It’s a highly intellectual game that involves strategy and knowing your opponent.” 
You looked up through your lashes as you glanced down at the board. “And you think you know me?” 
“I’d like to think I do, after ten years.” 
You made a noise of contemplation. “Hmm, I was under the impression you didn’t remember a thing about me.” 
“Wanting to forget you and forgetting you are two vastly different things, Y/N.” 
You smiled. 
“You’ve never said my name before,” you noted quietly, your heart fluttering and warming. He might not think it was important, or nice at all, but you’d waited a very long time to hear this. 
You were on a very different side of this romance. It appeared Charles wasn’t ready for it, but you were very much prepared to jump right in. Every little sentimental action he did, every little way he tilted his mouth, the way his eyes penetrated your very soul, the way his accent fell off his lips -- it was practically intoxicating. Here you were, swimming like a school girl like the night you found out you had a soulmate; yet it seemed for Charles you were just a guest to interact with, to mildly entertain. 
It tore your heart asunder. 
“I’m slowly learning to right some of my wrongs,” he said in a soft voice. “Alright, let’s see, so you have the pawn and the pawn can move like this, see?” he began and he took about ten minutes explaining the game to you, being very patient. 
“You ready to begin?” 
“Sure.”
So the two of you sat, playing chess, not saying a word for about twenty minutes, only halfway through the game. 
“So, did you play this when you had your powers?” you inquired cautiously. 
“Actually,” he began, making his move, taking your rook, “I did.” 
“Did you use them?” 
“I tried not to,” he explained, “but it’s like music playing in the background. You can pick up on things people are thinking if it’s loud, distinct, or stands out. So sometimes I would hear what they were thinking, sometimes I didn’t. I tried to ignore it.” 
“How did you learn to control them?”
“Practice. Quieting them was...is… the hardest part. Once that’s done, I can do the rest easily.” 
“And all the other… facets, like accessing memories, how did you learn how to do that? On a girlfriend or?” 
He laughed, his eyes never leaving the board as you studied your moves as well. “Are you trying to probe to see if I had a girlfriend previous to our… relationship?” 
You gave a quick half smile, filled with amusement. “I wasn’t consciously, but I suppose it slipped out. You’re avoiding the question, should I assume I’m right?” 
“You know, Dr. Y/L/N, not everything or everyone has to be psychoanalyzed,” he countered teasingly. 
“I know, I know. I just… I’m curious about that part of your life, that’s all.” 
“For your information, I didn’t test on my girlfriend. I actually used my step-brother. When he bullied me, afterwards, I’d probe his mind. I realized I could access memories, get into his head, and learned in there. At first, it was an accident, and I couldn’t break the link… but then when we went to sleep, it broke. Later, I purposely tried to connect, disconnect, and read thoughts. Until his father died, and they moved out that is…” 
“Did Raven ever meet Cain?”
“No. No, Raven came to us a few months after Cain’s father died and he moved away to live with his aunt.” 
“I see. So you practiced on your abusive step brother?” 
“It was all I had. Doing that to my mother felt wrong, Raven asked that I never do it to her, and with the kids at school I couldn’t tell if I was reading memories or fantasies. Your move by the way.”
“Oh, yes, right,” you said, snapping out of your sympathy induced trance. You made an arbitrary move before getting back to the conversation. “So no girlfriend?” 
“Like a dog with a bone,” he muttered.
“I prefer the term persistent.”
“No, no girlfriend in the picture. Not for some time. I dated briefly, just after Harvard.” 
“So… when you were seventeen?” 
“Mhm. She was an undergrad. She wasn’t very mature though, so it was over before it began. I knew I wouldn’t find anyone on my level. I couldn’t even legally buy cigarettes but I had graduated college, so… the odds of me finding anyone worthy of my time were slim. Of course, that was before your scribbling showed up on my arm.” 
“That wasn’t scribbling,” you accused with a laugh, fake offense in your tone. “I put a lot of time, thought, and effort into that, thank you.” 
“If that’s your example of a lot of time and effort then maybe I still haven’t met my intellectual match, hmm?” he joked. 
You narrowed your eyes before taking his bishop. 
“Maybe you spoke too soon,” you challenged as he glanced up at you and you raised an eyebrow. 
“Perhaps I did. And you?” 
“What about me?” 
“Did you have a highschool sweetheart before you knew about me?” 
“Oh, well… I don’t really see how it’s relevant--”
“Double standard, Y/N. That isn’t very nice. I was probed about my entire romantic career but I can’t get so much as a--”
“Fine. Yes. I dated. Two guys in high school. One lasted about eight months from January of sophomore year to the beginning of junior year.”
“And the second?” 
“Four months of junior year.”
“No one dazzled you senior year?” 
“Just you,” you hummed, not thinking before you answered. 
“Oh, just me?” he asked, catching your little slip up. 
Your cheeks heated before you smiled. “Yes, if I’m being totally honest.”
He was looking at you, curiosity and merriment burning in his face. He’d only glanced at you three times during this whole game. In a way, you were thankful. When he gave you a direct look you felt like you always had to overshare. When he was looking down at the board you could focus on answering carefully, filtering. When he was staring at you, it was like truth serum. 
“So what happened with the other two?” he questioned as his attention drifted back down to the board. 
“One was determined that I follow him, you know, go to the college he had his eye on, despite what I wanted. So we parted ways.” You made a move. “And the other liked a friend of mine more so we mutually ended things.” 
“Sounds like you haven’t had any bad luck with men, so that’s good.” 
“Sounds like you haven't had any luck with women. One woman throughout your whole life? You’re thirty-two.” 
“Yes, so?” 
“Well, if you only dated at seventeen--”
“Y/N, I met you, my soulmate, at twenty-one. I didn’t date after that, so, most of my life, has been with you… Romantically, that is, if that’s what you want to call this.”
“You swore off dating for me?” 
“Of course,” he said as if it were obvious, “didn’t you do the same for me?” 
“Yeah without question.”
“So why do you find it odd that I did the same?” 
“Well,” you started, nervously wringing your hands, “you’re you, you know? Handsome, accomplished, driven, confident.” 
“And you’re just a wet rag? Or what am I missing? You’re all those things as well, except handsome. I’d choose a different word.” 
“And what word might that be?” 
“Nothing short of stunning.”
His words made you blush quickly and smile to yourself. 
“So tell me, why did you commit to us but were worried I didn’t?” he wondered.
“You just have so much more going for you than I do.” 
“That’s not true. I know quite a bit about you and you’re quite the catch. Not to mention, I’m not like that. I was dedicated to you the moment we encountered each other.” 
“I’m glad to know you felt the same about this.” 
“Of course,” he concurred before the two of you finished the game, with him beating you easily. 
“Ugh, see that’s why I don’t like that vile game.” 
He chuckled. “It’s a fantastic game. You did quite well for your first time. I bet you’ll beat me next time.” 
You couldn’t help but laugh, loudly. “Not likely.”
“You should believe in yourself more.” 
“I believe in myself plenty, except when it comes to strategy games.”
“But you play gin rummy?” 
“Well that’s entirely different,” you assured with a smile as the two of you cleared the chess game. 
“Is it now? Well let’s just see. I’ve got some cards in my desk drawer there. Show me how to play  and we’ll see if it’s all that different.” 
“Okay, sure. You got to show your prowess, I’ll show you mine.” 
“There’s that feistiness I missed,” he cheered as you got up and got the cards, his words making you stop for half a second. 
So he did miss you...
“Okay, so the game is easy, especially compared to that mini war game we just played,” you joked and he smiled. Knowing you could do that to him lit you up inside. 
You explained the game, all the rules and played. He caught on quickly, which didn’t surprise you - he was practically a genius. What did surprise you however, was that he beat you at your own game. 
“How the hell did you--?” you started, flabbergasted, staring down at the table. 
“All strategy games are the same, Y/N. I’ve been playing them for a while.” 
“But this is my game and you, you just beat me.” 
“Oh, don’t be a sore loser. You’ll do fine next time.” 
“I should’ve done fine this time,” you mumbled. “Well I need to get dinner made, so I’ll be off. See you for dinner?” 
He nodded and smiled and you left, reflecting on the good bit of information you’d learned that day. And focusing on how this might not be as bad as you thought.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Forever Tag:
@essie1876​​​​​
@magpiegirl80​​​​​
@letsgetfuckingsuperwholocked​​​​​
@iamwarrenspeace
@marvel-imagines-yes-please​​​​​
@superwholocked527
@missinstantgratification​​​​​
@thejemersoninferno​​​​​
@rda1989​​​​​
@munlis​​​​​
@thefridgeismybestie​​​​​
@bubblyanarocks3​​​​​
@igiveupicantthinkofausername​​​​​
@kaliforniacoastalteens​​​​​
@feelmyroarrrr​​​​​
@kaeling
@friendlyneighbourhoodweirdo​​​​​
@damalseer​​​​​
@heyitscam99​​​​
@yknott81​​​​
@sorryimacrapwriter​​​​​
@glitterquadricorn​​​​​
@xxqueenofisolationxx
@little-dis-kaalista-pythonissama
@bittersweetunicorm​​​​​
@alyssaj23​​​​​
@sea040561​​​​​
@princess76179​​​​​
@thisismysecrethappyplace​​​​​
@sarahp879​​​​​
@malfoysqueen14​​​​​
@ellallheart​​​​​
@breezy1415​​​​​
@marvelmayo​​​​​
@lyniboy​​​​​
@paintballkid711​​​​
Charles Xavier
@bohemianrhapsody86​​​​
@lenawiinchester​​​​​​
TSMU
@tilltheendwilliwrite​​​​​
65 notes · View notes
sepublic · 4 years
Note
One of the weird things about WiLW is that, despite everyone canceling Boscha and declaring Boschlow dead (even as a crackship), it kinda makes the best case so far for why it could be made to work. If that makes sense? Like it was my nOTP before, but I saw how both of their biggest flaws is the other's greatest strength. And a fiery odd-couple opposites-attract pair would be a good foil to the sweet pining soulmates that are Lumity. Their history gets in the way, but not insurmountably so.
           Now, this is an idea I hesitantly consider and tread upon, for obvious reasons… Boschlow was a fun crack ship back during the mid-season hiatus, as the only thing we saw Boscha do to Willow was mockingly call her out for not being invited to the Moonlight Conjuring, and that was about it. But then Understanding Willow revealed that Boscha had in fact been bullying Willow for quite a while, and clearly it left QUITE some damage on Willow’s psyche… And while Boscha’s bullying in WilW was implied to be more intense than her usual torment, that doesn’t change the fact that she literally dumped garbage on Willow! I’m not opposed to seeing the two reconcile… But clearly, Boscha owes all of the apologies here, and has a lot to make up for, and Willow would be justified in not wanting to ever contact the girl, ever again.
           Honestly, I don’t necessarily see Willow and Boscha as two sides of the same coin, like I do for Luz and Amity… The two of them are mostly just foils and contrasts to one another. Though, I AM always eager to hear others’ takes on the two, and how one might interpret Willow and Boscha as such! At the very least, I think Willow and Boscha, initially, had an ‘out of sight, out of mind’ principle to how they dealt with things that troubled them, to varying degrees… There’s Willow not wanting to dwell on her bad memories with Amity, which she does in a healthier sense than Boscha- Who will sometimes dismiss her issues about something, because the thing in question is actually just dumb and doesn’t matter anyway!
          But as we can see… Boscha doesn’t always entirely ignore things, either- She’ll dredge up drama and go out of her way to antagonize others like Willow, instead of simply ignoring her feelings on the matter and letting it be done! She’ll LET her displeasure be known, and while it’s good for Boscha to sometimes acknowledge her unhappiness, she unfortunately proceeds to deal with it in a less than constructive manner… I feel like an actually healthy relationship/dynamic between the two would also require Boscha to tone herself down quite a bit, even if she can still maintain that sense of fiery competitiveness and boldness that she’s always had.
          Likewise, while I think Willow has EVERYTHING to give and provide to Boscha, more on that later… I’m not sure there’s really anything meaningful that Boscha could give her, that others don’t already do and better? Boscha’s strength is artificial and toxic to herself and others. Superficially it might make Willow feel better initially, but in the long run Boscha’s ideals are harmful. Especially if she tries to imply to Willow that she’s ‘worthy’ specifically because of her prowess with Plant magic, and not regardless of it. But, I am liable to others’ takes and interpretations on the two!
           Personally, my read on Boscha is that she’s afraid. She doesn’t want to be a ‘loser’, she’s afraid of the potential loneliness and emotional turmoil that may come from that, and she thinks that losers ‘deserve’ their own pain, no less… So Boscha is actively trying to compensate for who she is, so she can ‘prove’ herself as better than that, both to her own personal concepts, and maybe to someone else…
           She also seems fixated on pain, in a sense- Her own, and causing retribution towards those who ‘hurt’ Boscha. There’s a quiet moment where Boscha is impressed by how mature Luz is, for taking all of the blame… And she briefly seems to reevaluate her stance on Luz, before stubbornly sticking to her previous dislike. It’s like Boscha felt actual sympathy for Luz in that moment, but then closed off any room for reconsidering who Luz was and respecting her. She doesn’t want to change her mind on ‘losers’ like Luz, because surely there was a good reason for hating and bullying people like that…
           Boscha doesn’t want to reconsider her stance on Luz, not let the girl get into her head and ‘infect’ her with weakness. She’s lowkey afraid of the kind of people that Luz and Willow are, or what she sees them as; And it’s why she’s so vehemently livid towards ‘losers’ like those two! And, I think Willow could be interesting for Boscha, because Willow was obviously who Boscha hated the most, or at least much longer, compared to others. She singled out Willow, almost like she was projecting her own insecurities onto the girl, that hurting Willow would be like gaining retribution upon the insecurities and flaws that Boscha saw in herself, and the girl.
           Going back to what I said about Boscha focusing on retribution, how she doesn’t seem willing to repair and heal over mistakes together, and would rather punish… I think Willow is someone who can teach Boscha how to forgive, withoutforgetting. And let’s be real here, can it even be said if Willow and Luz ACTUALLY hurt Boscha in a serious sense, and/or their actions weren’t justified, plus completely innocent? Not to mention, Boscha is ignoring that all of those other students chose to prioritize attention to Willow over Boscha? Aside from Boscha recognizing that a lot of her own pain came from herself and her own exaggerated reactions to Luz and Willow’s innocent actions…
           We saw how Willow dealt with pain, regarding Amity. I feel like she’s someone who can show Boscha how to deal with that sort of thing, how one can actually be mindful of the circumstances of what happened, and really take that into account, while considering one’s feelings and the source of those emotions. Clearly the situation was different, as Willow did nothing to deserve Amity’s rejection, while Boscha MORE than earned some negative karma on her own end… But you get the idea.
           Boscha needs to actually get over her apprehensions about ‘losers’ like Luz and Willow, before she can truly heal… Instead of just ignoring those feelings first and getting along, because that kind of friendship would then be superficial. Boscha changing her apprehensive stance on someone like Willow, especially, is important- Because to Boscha, Willow is emblematic and definitive of the kind of person she doesn’t want to be… Or at least, she’s the one closest to that definition, that Boscha can actively get away with tormenting.
           Changing her stance on Willow would show so much, how Boscha has learned to improve and open her mind to other people and their ways of living and existing, and feeling. Perhaps it would be THE final step/accomplishment, the ultimate proof of Boscha having changed… Not making the same mistakes, when presented the chance to. Willow is someone who can show Boscha that the kind of person that she doesn’t want to be… ISN’T so bad after all, that there’s nothing to be afraid of, you aren’t necessarily going to become that kind of person by being with them- And even if you do, it’s not so bad! It’d be incredibly relieving to Boscha, and I can see her being grateful to Willow…
           Likewise, I can see her admiring Willow- Boscha can now appreciate just how strong and vigilant Willow really is, and how inspiring the Park girl is to her. Willow proves to Boscha that the kind of person she is, isn’t just someone to accept- It’s the kind of person to learn and take cues from, to strive to be like! Boscha is going to be amazed at how strong Willow was, withstanding all those years of abuse when Boscha herself likely couldn’t even IMAGINE handling that… She’s going to show Boscha that there’s more than one way to be strong, and arguably, Willow’s way is better. Willow can show Boscha that you can be soft and open with others, while being even stronger and more resilient to pain, than the kind of person Boscha was…
           And, it can show Boscha how to truly defend herself. How to be strong in a way that REALLY matters, and then Boscha can feel safe in a real sense, VS barricading herself past several walls she’s built up, but otherwise never overcoming her fear and adversity. Really, I think Willow has WAY more to teach Boscha, rather than the other way around… While I’m all for people mutually teaching one another different things, it’s worth noting that Boscha was entirely in the wrong for bullying Willow, and that Willow was certainly not ‘guilty’ of anything that warranted this kind of torment whatsoever.
           Willow has definitely ‘outgrown’ Boscha and her destructive fire. And, considering what Boscha did to her… Like I said, Willow has a lot to offer Boscha. But Boscha isn’t owed that, Boscha has had an issue with thinking she’s owed reverence and glory for being ‘strong’, for having suffered and endured and used that pain to forge herself into a ‘superior’ kind of person… But in the end, Boscha needs to not be entitled, and realize that she’s no better nor worse than anyone else. And she can’t work to change this fact, either- It’s just how it is!
           Willow doesn’t owe Boscha anything. She’s not the girl’s caretaker, she’s not her savior unless Willow wants to be… Which leads me to the idea that to start, Boscha needs to just let Willow exist. She needs to be mindful of Willow’s existence, give the girl room to flourish and grow… And Boscha needs to apologize, with no expectations attached. Only by healing their relationship, and getting it to a point where Boscha won’t hurt Willow, nor does she expect anything from Willow because of this… Only then can Willow feel safe about teaching Boscha a thing or two on how to live, and even so, that’s entirely her choice. Boscha needs to prove that she’ll respect whatever decision Willow makes, even if it prioritizes Willow and/or others over Boscha herself. It’s not some personal insult towards Boscha, people have their own lives that don’t revolve around her, and they don’t owe the girl anything for being ‘better’ than them, not that Boscha actually is to begin with!
           This is, of course, all speculation- Most of which hinges entirely on my specific read and interpretation of Boscha and her character. Honestly, this could prove very wrong if we learn more about Boscha’s character, and I’d have to reevaluate how a relationship between her and Willow would work. But first and foremost, Boscha needs to respect Willow as her own person, and not just a potential girlfriend, nor as someone she should idolize, either… Willow doesn’t have to be ‘cool’ in Boscha’s eyes to gain her respect. And similarly, I can see Boscha getting close with Willow, but then trying to play up how cool she is to others, and maybe how cool Willow is… Because she wants to justify being with a ‘loser’ like Willow.
           And Willow will rightfully take offense at that. She’s going to tell Boscha to stop trying to act like Willow herself is so ‘lowly’ that Boscha needs to socially compensate for being friends with her. Willow herself, on her own, is perfect as-is, and Boscha doesn’t have to act like she isn’t- She needs to stop caring about appearances or the opinions and reverence of others, so much! Boscha needs to value her own opinion of herself, her own self-worth, without making it dependent on whether or not others fear/adulate her.
           It’s kind of like Amity or Lilith, in a sense- Where Boscha doesn’t believe in her own evaluation of herself nor trust it… So she looks to others as a judge, as a litmus test to decide if she’s ‘worthy’ or lovable and whatnot. Boscha looks to how others reverentially regard her in order to decide if she’s good enough, instead of just looking at the mirror and deciding that if Boscha is happy- Then she IS good enough! All that should be required is for Boscha to be happy and content with herself. Her own opinion of herself DOES have value, believe it or not… And that’s something Willow herself learned, too, though unlike Boscha she didn’t try to cope with feeling ‘unworthy’, by hurting others- Instead Willow just ‘accepted’ this alleged lowliness of herself before Luz pointed out otherwise, that Willow was never unworthy to begin with!
           So, yeah- Boscha needs to stop being afraid of the kind of person that Willow is. She needs to see that people like Willow and Luz are perfectly valid as-is, that there is no hierarchy where a certain type of person is better or worse than others. Boscha needs to trust in her own opinion and self-confidence in herself, and not be so reliant on what others have to say. She needs to stop being entitled to power and adulation, even if Boscha went through the effort to ‘earn’ it… Because nobody agreed to compensate Boscha in the first place. It’s like working so hard to give someone gifts without them even asking, and then expecting to be rewarded. Boscha needs to be mindful of others and their existence, and see it as not that bad anway… And that it’s okay to be like others. Boscha can still hold onto her own identity, and remember her own feelings while still working past them.
           Honestly, this could be but the tip of the iceberg, regarding the many issues that Boscha has, and how Willow could help her. On the flipside, I can see Boscha being the kind of person to mercilessly give Willow encouragement… And tell Willow that yes, Willow IS strong, and she did earn the right to be beloved by others! But again, this ties back into the idea of love being conditional, which seems contradictory to what this show has to say. Like I said, Willow has so much more to teach Boscha, and it’s up to her to decide if she wants to- And even so, Boscha needs to recognize that her existence isn’t exactly reliant on whatever decision that Willow makes, either.
          Really, I’m not at all against seeing Boscha’s character be explored and given depth, maybe even reformed for her own sake? I guess I’m a forgive and forget type of guy. I’m willing to forgive Lilith, who cursed her own sister, and was also Head Witch of the Emperor’s Coven- So she hurt a lot of other people BESIDES Eda, and that’s something Lilith herself and some people in the fandom need to recognize more. And I feel like government persecution is worse than bullying, not to say the latter isn’t bad either- If anything, bullying already being bad, as-is, just says a lot more about how terrible persecution is by being worse!
           And me, I’m willing to consider motives and introspection for freaking Belos, who committed genocide upon wild witches just for existing, and set up the toxic coven system and environment that contributed to Boscha’s own toxicity in the first place. I guess for some, Boscha’s bullying hits closer to home than Belos’ persecution of people, hence why they’re justifiably angrier at her particularly. Those feelings are absolutely valid… Unfortunately, recent events have led to government persecution becoming a lot more relatable as well. Which, gets me to my point that if I can consider Belos’ side of the story, I can at least do the same for Boscha. Not to mention, it’s worth noting that Lilith and Belos are fully-grown adults, but Boscha is still a kid- So she’s got room to improve and change people, let’s remember that amidst still holding her accountable!
57 notes · View notes
greatqueenanna · 4 years
Text
Tumblr media
Why A Frozen Heart does not support a redemption for Hans.
Whenever I explore the Helsa tag for neat fanart and ideas, I always come across a post or two about Elizabeth Rudnick’s book, A Frozen Heart, and why this book supports the idea that Hans should get a redemption arc. It is no secret that I’ve talked about this book before in debates on my Hans related posts, and why I actually don’t consider this book part of the Frozen Franchise Canon.
Jen Lee and Chris Buck had no involvement in it. I cannot find any sources where Jen Lee, Chris Buck or Elizabeth Rudnick talking about this book. 
There are a number of inconsistencies between the book and the original film Frozen. I4
It is labeled as a ‘retelling’ for young adults, basically telling a story differently than what was presented in canon. It’s almost a remake.
Disney Corp. doesn’t seem to consider it canon either, given the fact that they presented this image at the Hyperion Frozen Performance in 2016.   
Tumblr media
To give some perspective, A Frozen Heart was written in 2015. If it the book was 100% canon, then they would have to acknowledge the family from that book in this performance. Also, Frozen Heart talks about how some of his brothers have blonde hair, to which here they all have red.
But with this being said, because of the fact that it keeps being brought up by the Hans Redemption fan-base, I feel it is finally time for me to revisit the book - I re-read all of Hans’ chapters, and after doing this, this is my conclusion -
Hans is still very much portrayed with sociopathic traits and still does not deserve a redemption arc, as he is very conniving and evil in this book, just as his whole family. I do agree that the portrayal of him as a sociopath is not the greatest in this book, as he demonstrates fear and anxiety. Regardless, he still shows traits of being narcissistic and manipulative, and states himself that he doesn’t feel emotions, which are big traits when it comes to ASPD.
More Under the read more. *WARNING*, this section i going to be very long, sorry.
Evidence 1: Fleeting Sympathy
The first evidence of sociopathic traits comes early on, when Hans supposedly feels sympathy for his oldest brother’s wife.
She (Caleb’s Wife) looked painfully uncomfortable, and for a brief moment, Hans felt sorry for her(....)Well, at least father is kind to her. Hans acknowledged, some of his sympathy fading. (pg. 27)
Now, it is easy to misinterpret this quote as Hans showing empathy. However, the author labels this as sympathy, not empathy. What’s the difference?
Sympathy is like pity, where someone will acknowledge that someone is suffering. Empathy is when someone actually feels bad about it, and wants to help said person or see them feel better.
Here, Hans simply acknowledges that Caleb’s wife is suffering, but doesn’t feel out right sorry for her. In fact, it states that Hans only felt sorry for her for a brief moment, and this pity is fleeting. Why? Because Hans puts his own suffering above hers.
If Hans actually felt empathy for her, he wouldn’t acknowledge his own suffering, and instead just comment on how uncomfortable she looks. For example -
“She looked painfully uncomfortable. Hans felt bad for her; he knew what it was like to be ignored and her struggle made him wince.” 
Or something like that. But Hans is actually saying this -
“Well, she’s suffering, and that’s sad, but my life is worse so who cares.”
Here, it clearly shows that while Hans can recognize that people can be sad, but will always put his own emotions and needs above other’s.
Evidence 2: Disrespect
Now on to how Hans treats Lars. Lars has an understanding with Hans because he used to be the younger brother, thus he’s nicer to Hans. Hans even recognizes that Lars is the only person he can talk to - but there’s a catch. Hans only wants to talk about himself.
On pg. 39, Hans states that Lars could go on and on about History. The chapter states that while Hans find his hobby endearing, he refuses to listen for more than a few minutes, often getting up and leaving without telling him anything. This shows that Hans has no real respect for Lars or his interests, and only indulges him because Lars is the only one who treats Hans nicer.
On page 60, Hans also shows disgust for the villagers giving him something in place of tax payments, showing no sympathy for their situation and finding their alternate payments disgusting.
Evidence 2 Envy for Power and Praise.
There is a moment in the book where Hans daydreams about being the only son, and getting constant attention from his father. This is on page 28 - 29.
His frustration here is not that the King is abusive, but that his father ignores him. And only him. In fact, he indirectly insults his older brother.
“Hans wondered if Caleb even appreciated his father’s attention.”
Without considering his brother’s emotions or stance on the subject, Hans shrugs away any empathy for his brother and out write states that Caleb doesn’t appreciate the attention he gets from their father.
Of course, the argument could be made that Hans’ brothers treat him poorly, so there’s no reason for him to feel pity for them. And while that may be true for some of his brothers, Caleb has never been shown to be abusive towards him. Thus, his envious comments are unwarranted. He simply doesn’t like him because Caleb receives the attention from his father that Hans craves. 
It is also worthy to note that Hans does not desire love or compassion from his father. He only wants him to give him what he believes he is entitled to - praise and becoming a King.
Later on, Hans basically becomes a lapdog to his father in order to convince him to let him go to Arendelle. The author mentions this -
“Even now, when he had been given a role of some honor, he couldn’t let go of the bitterness of his past. But never mind that, he thought, I’ll show them soon enough.” (Pg. 58)
This shows that even now when he has slowly started to earn respect from his father, and gaining an honorable position at his side, it is not enough for him. He craves more power, and only becoming a King will supposedly satisfy this thirst.
On Page 85, Hans shows envy at Anna and Elsa sharing a bond.
Evidence 4 Objectifying Others
Hans feels entitled for a wife in the early pages of the book. This goes to show that Hans does not view women as people, but as objects to further his own status.  
“And while he had heard the royal affairs coordinator discussing possible suitors for his brothers, Hans had not heard a peep about a possible wife for him.” (Pg. 32)
Later on, when Lars tells Hans about Elsa being single, he essentially treats her as if she’s a tool for his advantage, not a human being.
“This plan meant getting his father to trust him and convincing a woman he had never met to marry him(...)He would have to stop spending his days daydreaming and learn how to become more conniving.” (Pg. 42)
It’s so easy for Hans to just accept the fact that he would need to be conniving in order to get what he wants. He doesn’t feel bad for thinking it, nor does he try to consider what Elsa has been though. She’s just the mysterious princess who he needs to convince to marry him. Nothing more.
“No matter what Queen lay in wait for him inside Arendelle’s castle, Hans knew that he would find a way to become her King.” (Pg. 59)
Again, overall disinterest in Elsa as a human being, and only refers to her as a ‘what’ and that she is his for the taking. This is further supported on Pg. 65, when he runs into Anna thinking its Elsa.
“That, he thought, could not have gone better. Princess Elsa of Arendelle was practically his!”
Later on, after the run in, Hans is disappointed that he ran into Anna instead of Elsa, even considering running into her a joke. Pg. 71 -72. The only time he starts to consider Anna, is when he realizes that Elsa is unreachable. “Considering” is a strong word or course, as he is basically just throwing away one item and getting another, easily talking about how he wants to overthrow Elsa.
“It was all obvious now. He would marry Anna and overthrow Elsa.” (Pg. 77)
Again, Hans is so easily able to just announce these things without feeling even a bit of remorse, and treats the sisters as tools. 
We’re not even half way through the novel yet, and Hans has already showed his blatant disrespect for others, objectification of others, bitterness, and entitlement for power and possessions. Not once has he shown any sort of reluctance or empathy for his actions and thoughts, and has an unquenchable thirst for power.
To avoid this getting too long, I’m going to do a “Lightning Round” of quotes that shows Hans’ terrible nature.
“Hans let a out a sigh of relief as a warm feeling flooded his chest. Now, now, he told himself. Remember why you’re here. This is a business transaction, nothing more.” Pg. 100
While throughout the novel Hans does indeed show that he actually might have some kind of admiration for Anna, and even enjoys some of her antics, he makes it very clear that he has no interest in actually falling in love with her and stops himself when he thinks he might be enjoying her company.  
Next, while Anna and Hans are trying to tell Elsa about their engagement -
“Hans remembered the advice from his father(...)If you wanted to get someone to like you, you just had to act like a mirror. People love their own reflections.” (Pg. 104)
This shows that even in the novel’s universe, Hans purposefully mirrors people because he knows it will get people to like him. 
This is a big one. When Hans and his men find Elsa’s beautiful grove -
“Hans had been clinging to one single reassuring thought: Elsa was a monster. (...) It was this, her utter lack of humanity, which guaranteed Hans his chance to be a Hero. If the people of Arendelle feared Elsa, they would want her to be captured and restrained. They would want her to abdicate her throne, and in turn, they would want Hans to take it.(...) All he had to was make sure that she never created anything like this again. He would destroy this glen and any trace of beauty.”  (Pg. 198 - 199)
In this long passage that I summarized to the main points, Hans displays disappointment and how disgusted he is that Elsa is capable of beauty, because he wants everyone to think she’s a monster. He even states that he will destroy all evidence of Elsa’s beauty.  
The book also recognizes Hans’ actions towards the chandelier.
Hans looked around the room desperate for a plan, and noticed the giant chandelier directly above Elsa. (...) True, it might kill her, but would that be so bad? One less obstacle to the throne.” (Pg. 226)  
Chapter 26 showcases the darkest Hans has ever been throughout the novel. The entire chapter is filled with such hateful and entitled comments from him, it’s ridiculous. Honestly, I could sit here and quote the whole chapter. But let’s just get a couple of the worst things.
“Hans shook his head, He wasn’t there to fill a hole in Anna’s heart. He was there to win a throne. (...) The Westargaards didn’t do emotion - that was the one legacy he had been given.” (Pg. 244)
This confirms that Hans doesn’t feel emotions, something he feels he inherited from his family. 
Now, this one hurts. I wanted to cry for Anna. I want this quote to really sink in, especially for those that feel that this book justifies a redemption arc for Hans.
“Did she honestly think this was one such tale? Hans couldn’t help himself. After years of bullying by his brothers, after years of taking the joke but never making the joke, after years of being the thirteenth son, he was going to get the last laugh. And he wanted to make it count. (...) She looked up at him, confusion racing across her face. At one time, he might of pretended to care. But he was done playing games.” (Pg. 244 - 245)
A few quick observations -
Later, on page 258,  Hans states that the reason he didn’t like to be a murderer was because he didn’t want to be considered a brute, not because he felt anything for Elsa (or Anna for that matter).
On page 271, Hans states that he feels ‘pride’ when Elsa falls down in grief over her sister’s death.
And finally, after everything was said and done, and Hans had failed, he feels absolutely no remorse for his actions, and instead shows pity to only himself.
“If only I had acted a moment sooner, Hans had thought. Then they (the sisters) would never have known forgiveness. Never felt the love of a sibling again. Just like me. Just like my entire life. Elsa would have been dead. Anna would’ve followed soon after, and I would have taken what I deserve.” (Pg. 285 - 286)
And with that, I put this book down. While, again, there is no concrete evidence to say that this book might be considered canon, I still respect what Elizabeth Rudnick wrote here, despite that some of her facts were a little off. She was really good at being able to capture a sociopathic mind, and even able to give me chills, even if it wasn’t perfect at all times.
There is honestly no source, no canon or non-canon work, that supports a redemption arc for Hans. Even in A Frozen Heart, contrary to popular belief.
112 notes · View notes
love-sapphirerose · 3 years
Text
Optimally Maximal Relationship Failures
https://www.deviantart.com/antoni-matteo-garcia/art/Optimally-Maximal-Relationship-Failures-863430102
This demotivational poster is super aggro and mega highly Anti-SessKagu, Anti-KogAya, Anti-InuKag, Anti-Kagura to some extent, Anti-Kouga to a vastly significant extent, Anti-Kagome to a huge extent, but also Pro-Sesshoumaru, Pro-Inuyasha, Pro-Ayame, and highly Pro-SessAyaInu. Sit back and relax, as I tear into Sesshoumaru's and Kagura's failure of a relationship, Kouga's and Ayame's major fart of a romance that should never have been, and Inuyasha's and Kagome's annoying volatility, why Kagura does not deserve Sesshoumaru, why Kouga and Kagome only deserve my ire, wrath, and fury, and why Sesshoumaru, Inuyasha, and Ayame deserve so much better in each other. Furthermore, this is my contribution to this year's Red Ribbon Reviewers' month. Behold, my dear readers, my three greatest NOTPs of all time. Sure, I consider Naraku with anybody my greatest choice of a NOTP because someone as manipulatively dastardly such as Naraku deserves to be alone, done for, and truly deserves jack shit! However, that is too obvious of a choice. These three are the ones that make me want to tear my hair off and carve the hearts of Kouga and Kagome out with a blunt knife as well as tell Kagura to vamoose. As you can clearly tell, I have put these from bad to worse to the worst, with Sesshoumaru x Kagura being something absolutely unpleasant, Kouga x Ayame being a whole lot more atrocious, and Inuyasha x Kagome being the indubitable equivalent to toxic waste mixed with gallons of poison. Ergo, SessKagu is a bad pairing, KogAya is so much worse, and InuKag is the absolute worst pairing to exist in Inuyasha. I am aware that there are a good number of people who love to pair Sesshoumaru with Kagura because of how appealingly sexy they appear together. However, now that I have discarded those rose-tinted glasses for good, I can see this failure of a relationship for what this signifies and this all falls on Kagura's shoulders. Lest one forget that Kagura killed Kouga's tribesmen of her own volition and got pleasure out of that, trapped Miroku and Sango at Mt. Hakurei also by her own volition, kidnapped Rin, used Akago as a vessel to feed on Kagome's dark side, was manipulated into serving Princess Kaguya in the false hopes of wanting her freedom, and tended to mock Inuyasha. All of these atrocities would make Sesshoumaru fully cognizant that Kagura is far from being his equal in a relationship. Her dirty record as well as her hissy fit at Sesshoumaru for not helping her desire to be free from Naraku make her a co-dependent partner which can only spell failure in the long-term. As a mother to Rin, she would definitely fail badly because of her aforementioned dirty record and she would not be fully worthy of any sort of emulation. For someone like Kagura who is a formidable fighter, she has abused her wind powers to cause chaos and misery. Her passing may be tragic, but the awful deeds she has done are not worthy of my forgiveness. At least Sesshoumaru is free from being in a co-dependent relationship with that polarizing wind sorceress. Kouga x Ayame or KogAya is a couple I will never understand the appeal of. Yes, they are both wolf yokai, but these two could not be any more different, as Kouga is a big bluffer of a bully and a Karma Houdini and Ayame is a naturally brave, strong, fearless warrior princess with hidden depths that should have been fully realized! I have dreaded at the thought of these two ending up together because of all the failures and atrocities that would all resurface if Ayame were to find out all the horrible crimes Kouga has committed against an innocent young girl, Rin, and his entire tribe. This also extends to him not being the strong fighter he has made himself out to be and nothing more than a perennially pathetic loser who has relied on the Shikon Jewel's power instead of harnessing his own strength, as if the Shikon Jewel shards on his legs are a metaphor for steroids being used to give someone an artificial boost of strength and power. If Ayame dared to discover all of those atrocities, crimes, and rubbish Kouga has committed, she will be undoubtedly appalled at him and would repudiate him for good. I will reiterate that all of my sympathy goes to Ayame because of the fact that she deserves so much better than this pathetic waste of effort and time and deserves to grow as a veritably formidable heroine worthy of emulation, especially to all the young girls of the world. The mere fact that Kouga and his wolves killed innocent villagers including Rin who has lost her family and had to wander the world alone before she was revived Sesshoumaru through his Tenseiga and got away with murder, mainly relied on the Shikon Jewel's power to accelerate his strength and speed without working that on his own, and did not avenge his fallen comrades at the hands of Naraku and Kagura should all make Ayame's insides turn and make her reject Kouga for good and for all. Ergo, Ayame does not deserve this pathetic Karma Houdini and deserves to estrange herself from him forever, thus making her be the mother Rin truly deserves and will gladly give her her unconditional love and compassion to help her grow as a person. Speaking of couples I do not understand the appeal of by any shape of the imagination, we have my most dreaded NOTP of all time in the form of Inuyasha x Kagome or InuKag. Even as a child of eleven years old, I did not tune in to Inuyasha to see their soap opera fart of a relationship desecrating Adult Swim let alone the airwaves no matter where I was watching this series. I mainly tuned in to Inuyasha to see him growing from strength to strength and kick loads of butt, especially in his full yokai form. Furthermore, the more I saw Kagome and her brand of shrewishness, manipulativeness, brattiness, pettiness, jealousy, and callousness, the more irritated I became. There was barely any semblance of a romantic relationship blooming between Inuyasha and Kagome, as it was more of Kagome being the owner to Inuyasha's pet, especially where the Beads of Subjugation and the purpose of Inuyasha's sword Tessaiga are concerned. The Beads of Subjugation were used for Inuyasha to not do anything rash while the Tessaiga, aside from being a sword of destruction, was also intended to be used to protect those who are oppressed. Being the manipulative shrew Kagome was, she believed this would give her leeway for Inuyasha to shield her and be her "knight in shining armor" who will save her from all forms of danger without honing her own skills as a fighter. What is worse is that Kagome extends her manipulation to Miroku, Sango, and Shippou aka The Dunderhead Family to be nothing more than her pathetic posse and have them jump on a certain bandwagon that has brought Inuyasha a whole bunch of trauma. I am, of course, talking about how he was still hurting from the guilt he felt when Naraku manipulated both him and Kikyou into betraying each other. Miroku, Sango, Shippou, and especially Kagome never understood Inuyasha's pain and trauma in the slightest and The Dunderhead Family think that anytime Kagome was hurt it was all because of him. Furthermore, there is the fact that Inuyasha and Kagome are an undeniable example of being in a Karmic relationship with each other, given the many times they have been yelling, bickering, squabbling, and getting themselves in a heap of messily addictive habits that will only dig them deeper into more quagmires than find any sensibility or profound meaning. It says something that someone as compassionate, genuine, kind, and natural as Rin makes a far better companion to Inuyasha than The Dunderhead Family and...ugh....Kagome combined. Do not even get me started on the first episode of Yashahime because Inuyasha still has those accursed Beads of Subjugation on and she still does not trust him where Kikyou was concerned. Kagome was never attentive to him, never understood him in a profound level, and always believed she had dominance over him. This, my friends, is why I absolutely loathe InuKag with all of my being and it stands perched atop the medal platform of shame as my most disdained NOTP of all time. InuKag makes SessKagu more tolerable in comparison and the only other NOTP to ever come close to InuKag's brand of disgust is KogAya. Regardless, InuKag is the NOTP I will never want to touch with a twelve-foot pole. You might even noticed a recurring theme in terms of my discussion of my Inuyasha NOTPs and that is the importance of Rin. Well, she does play an integral part in not only Sesshoumaru's life but also the lives of Inuyasha and Ayame. Considering that Kouga and his wolves killed her in cold blood and got away with murder, Kagura kidnapped her as ransom for Sesshoumaru to annihilate Naraku, and that Kagome and The Dunderhead Family do not even come close to Rin's brand of compassion, I say that it was high time for Sesshoumaru to ditch Kagura, Inuyasha to give a big, fat, ugly screw-you to Kagome, and Ayame to drop kick Kouga in his family jewels to be the worthy parents to give Rin the great home she truly deserves complete with siblings in the forms of Dai, Roku, Kai, Shiori, and Shinta. To make things better, Rin will be definitely grateful to have two strong, powerful, brave dads like Sesshoumaru and Inuyasha, one courageous, honorable, compassionate mom like Ayame, three tough, independent, loving older brothers like Dai, Roku, and Kai, a lovable, caring, compassionate "twin" sister like Shiori because they are also the same age though Shiori is a month younger than her, and a lovable, sweet, attentive younger brother like Shinta. Just squeeze in Shuran, Hakkaku, and Ginta to be her loving uncles and Shunran to be her equally loving auntie and it will be a glorious family Rin will be more than happy to be a part of. With that said, having a three-way relationship with Sesshoumaru and Inuyasha being the chivalrous, caring, noble husbands to Ayame is so much better than having these three suffer a series of terrible relationships. This also extends to how proud Toga the Dog General and The Wolf Elder shall be of their progeny for giving Rin a great home and for finding true friends in Shuran, Hakkaku, Ginta, and Shunran who are just as supportive of Sesshoumaru, Inuyasha, and Ayame being in a three-way relationship. In conclusion, I am so ecstatic to make SessKagu, KogAya, and especially InuKag my biggest NOTPs for life. I will never touch these failures with a twelve-foot pole ever again, but the putrid effect of these NOTPs will forever remain ingrained in my memory as a stern reminder what bad relationships can look like. From the co-dependency found in Kagura's failed relationship with Sesshoumaru to the utter deception and lies Ayame would have found herself falling hook, line, and sinker all for Kouga's pathetic hide to Inuyasha's and Kagome's fart of a relationship only spelling death and destruction for years to come, there is nothing that will salvage these losers together. I am just going to keep Sesshoumaru, Inuyasha, and Ayame in a loving three-way relationship complete with a great family they can call their own and Shuran, Hakkaku, Ginta, and Shunran are going to be part of that family as their siblings for life. I hope you all enjoyed my evisceration of SessKagu, KogAya, and InuKag as my biggest NOTPs for life and I would love to hear from you if you agree with me on this. Until then, I will see you in the next submission. Take care and Happy Holidays, everybody. Sesshoumaru, Inuyasha, and Ayame as well as the lame-os known as Kouga, Kagura, and Kagome from Inuyasha belong to Rumiko Takahashi and Sunrise.
8 notes · View notes
ajw720 · 4 years
Text
Hello CCLand!  Have you missed me?  I know I have missed you all.  This post is not me coming back, frankly, I still have not decided how I want to navigate the future, but for the past 2 months all of this has been festering inside, so I need to post and make a few points.
First and foremost, I want to say that I am incredibly proud of my blog. I spent 5 years building a relationship with my readers and trying to provide a voice for 2 people who have been marginalized and frankly had their voices largely muted. I will never apologize for this or feel bad about it. Nor will I feel bad about pointing a finger at people that I know are truly evil.  
I am far from perfect and I admit, I made 2 massive errors.  I overshared because I was naive and never thought the information would be used against me.  And I did not pay enough attention to the hate blogs and their threats.
This was a blog that I started when I first learned about CC and frankly it grew out of love and a need to try to bring justice to a person that is absolutely a victim of a completely antiquated and abusive system.  Further, I don’t THINK D is closeted, I KNOW D is closeted.  And I have substantial facts to back up that statement.  I never intended to become the most read CC blog or to meets so many wonderful an amazing people that I admire, but that is what happened and that has given me great joy.
But with the good comes the bad, and what happened to me is absolutely sick and depraved.  And I am writing this post in hopes that someone will read it and see just how fucked up the behavior of a few “fans” has been towards me and to help them to extend this to what has been done to D and C.  Please do not feel sad for me, or send me sympathy, it is not my point.  But I hope that perhaps it will inspire some of you to be more active and to fight a little harder as I try to navigate the harassment that occurred to my family.
Pretty much since I started to write, I have been receiving hate, something to be expected when you join a fandom like this. But at some point, it became much more frequent and took a turn from manageable hate to harassment and bullying.  In October of 2017, I got my first ask with my full name and from that day forward there has been an active attempt to try to bullying me off the internet. Now ask why that is?  I am just a fan, with what most think is a crazy belief, with a relatively small following. I do not and have not tagged the players nor do I contact them directly. I have never been anything but incredibly polite to  D and C, and frankly I have ignored M whenever I have been in her presence because she is not worthy of my time or energy. I have never reached out to them over SM to make one statement about fandom. So why such an effort to silence my voice?  Especially if it is as insignificant as they claim?  
They tried deleting my blog, that failed. They tried with copyright infringements but I got smarter about making sure to post links.  So, what did they do?  They started with vicious attacks on my character on their hate blogs. Posting my full name and image.  Analyzing every word i wrote, desperately trying to debunk me, stating that i had severe mental health issues.  Tagged C, W, and A/lla to warn them about my presence at a book signing.  They stalked my friends and I at a festival, made false accusations, and published a photo. This meant that had to seek us out, locate where we were sitting and wait for a moment when they could get an image that they could twist to their favor.  That is insane. And there is no way to twist it to say its normal or expected.
But that apparently was enough harassment.  They threatened my work and my career.  Next, they started to stalk my family on the internet and use a devastating injury and a charity to harass and bully my family to the point that I did have to make the painful decision to not just stop posting but to protect my blog. This is completely vile and inexcusable behavior.  And the fact that it was not stopped, is a strong statement about the people clearly in control.
Why am I recounting? Because I want people to wake up and stop blaming D for every twist and turn.  If this is what they were willing to do to me, a mere fan, imagine what they are well to do to him, their absolute life sources? I am just another body left behind in the carnage, D is their source of money and fame. And not just his team and his “bride” but all of the people that have ridden his coattails to have name recognition.   
I wish people would realize this is not choose your own adventure book, D is a human who has been held against his will due to an enormous amount of power they clearly wield over him. How do you not see that if he could, he would end this?  This has not been about him being straight in so long, straight is how they control him and how they are able to make M relevant.  
And if you though this was a choice, how were you not woken up in the days following his dad’s death? I would guess not 48 hours after he buried his father, he was dragged from his mother’s home, forced to play dress up and pose for a ridiculous, cruel and inhumane set of pics.  D has lied about many things, but never about his parents, he has always been nothing but reverent when he speaks about them and his love and respect for them is clear.
Clearly, I have not gone anywhere, and I am still watching and reading every word. I have actually been incredibly proud of D during the majority of press for HW.  He has made so many statements that are a foundation for the truth, including telling us that young actors do things that they later learn to regret, telling us that HW has not changed, and stating that the person you see has a story we will never know.  
The press to legitimize and canonize M has been laughable and beyond transparent. It is so obvious this is on his list of required duties and the fact that they did not pause if for 1 week when his dad died is absolute proof that this is not a choice.
I do have to laugh at the irony of the d “quote” about fans being mean to his poor “wife” (that he himself has called a big girl).  So it is ok to bully a fan off the internet to the point that they stalked and harassed my family (and it does not matter if his was led by his team, her, her friends, or a fan in her name), but it is not ok for a small handful of fans to discuss the sad reality and point the finger at the truth?
Anyhow, this got way too long, but it has all been building up inside.  This blog was  such a massive part of my life and I miss it and you more than words can say. I encourage all of you to keep supporting these incredible men, I have no doubt they are worth it. I do think they next few months will bring about change, but what they change is, we still don’t know. I hope that D wins sooner than later. I am not certain how much longer he can be expected to sustain this weight.   If you reached this point, thank you for reading.    I am going back to my quiet corner now.  
62 notes · View notes
auriel187 · 3 years
Text
10 Things I Hate About You (Sam Winchester edition)
A/N: This is just an exert of what I have written so far...there will be more. Also, not specifically set in the 90’s or 2020’s.
Tumblr media
Sam (POV)
“Well, Mr. Winchester. I see we’re making our visits a weekly matter.” The Guidance Counselor said with a snide smile. She spoke almost bitterly, causing the young brunette to roll his colour shifting eyes in reply. He honestly couldn’t be bothered by her at this point. “Only so we can have these moments together.” He bit back with a forced smile. He stole a glance at her open computer. It was a widely known fact amongst the seniors that Ms.Perky spent most of her time writing her “romance” novel instead of, well... doing her actual job. “Should we get down to it, or should I turn off the lights?” He asked snarkily, adjusting his hold on his backpack. The shorter woman sent a glare his way as she reached for his discipline sheet from her desk. “Very funny, cowboy. It says here that you exposed yourself in the cafeteria.” He then huffed humorlessly. Did he even need to explain himself, it’s not like he’d get into trouble, he’s been living alone for the past four months. “I was joking with the lunch lady. It was a bratwurst.” He said not really ashamed at his actions but weirded out. It seemed more like something his brother would do.
“Well, a bratwurst. Aren’t we the optimist.” She quipped, with her eyes leveled to his crotch through his baggy blue jeans. ‘Gross’ he thought as his face contorted in disgust. She was still looking, even after a few seconds of awkward and impenetrable silence. “Next time, stick to the saddle, Texas. Scoot!” I left the room with an eye roll, I could have corrected her, told her I was from Kansas but I kinda had a feeling she didn’t give a shit and honestly, neither did I.
I walked down the hallway, towards my English class. Nice class if I was in the mood to listen, sadly that was rarely the case. Too many things distracting me about that class. Mostly that fuck boy model making some off handed comment that would get his ass flattened if people actually had the balls to stand up to him. As I made my way to class one thing I noticed is the fact that everyone is either blatantly staring or flatly avoiding looking at me. I caught the eyes of some of my schoolmates standing outside the Ms. Perky’s office, watching as they all began whispering the rumors that somehow spread at the sound of my name. I turned to glare at one of the guys staring at me. Another trust fund kid who wore their cardigan as a necktie. Those idiots who think they’re brilliant just because their dads donate to the school and they can’t pass a class no matter how simple the shit we’re learning is.
I seriously despise his school.
y/n (POV)
As much as I loved English class, I really would rather shove pins into my eyes rather than sit here with these flaming imbeciles. Being one of the six girls in the class of almost thirty didn’t help. Our teacher walked in with a look on his face that told me he was already done with all our crap. It was honestly quite funny. I take my seat in the middle of the class, Mr. Morgan chose to separate the girls from one another. It mainly had to do with the fact that they were vapid slow witted brats who didn’t read anything without a steamy sex scene and a muscle bound long haired Adonis on the cover. It was stuff like that that made me glad I was nothing like them. All these girls sitting around with their ‘I’m-not-like-other-girls’ crap just to drop their pants at the first guy to give them attention. And then there’s me, avidly avoiding contact with most people or completely annihilating the rest, what does it say about me that I’d rather have everyone hate my guts rather than change everything about myself to have friends who’d just talk shit about me when my back was turned?
“Okay class. What did y’all think of ‘The Sun Also Rises’?” Mr. Morgan began the second the bell rang. I saw one of the girls raise her hand with a fanciful flare and flick of her hair. I promise I’m not gonna internally barf if she ever does that shit again. “Oh, I loved it. He’s so romantic.” She melted at the thought, what an idiot. “Romantic, Hemingway? He was an abusive, alcoholic misogynist who squandered his inheritance following Picasso trying to nail his leftovers.” I mumbled aloud as I knocked lightly on my desk. I really needed to stop doing that. I could almost feel the eyerolls of my classmates. This’ll be good. “As opposed to a bitter, self righteous hag who has no friends?” Joey chastised me from his seat a few desks away from mine. “Pipe down, Chachi!” Mr. Morgan bit back, in my defence. I knew it was just because Joey pissed him off as much as he did myself. I slouched in my seat as I practically growled “I guess in this society being male and an asshole makes you worthy of our time.” I heard so chuckles from my classmates. Mr. Morgan just looked at me. “Can’t we read something different? What about Angie Thomas or Charlotte Bronte? Sylvia Plath?”
“What about them?” A voice echoed through the class, everyone turned their attention to the door, where two guys stood. The first one walked in and took a seat next to Joey, the other stood filling the doorway. “What did I miss?” He asked, taking a seat in the back of the class. He was wearing around four layers right now and all I could think of was how the hell has he not melted? “The whitewashed patriarchal values that dictate our education.” I said quickly, noticing the slight head tilt and small smile before I turned back around.
“Mr. Morgan, do you think it’s possible to get y/n to take her midol before she comes to class.” Joey and her douche brigade all laugh like that was the funniest shit on the planet. Mr. Morgan just deadpanned, looking Joey dead in the eye and saying “One day you’re gonna get bitch slapped, and I’m not gonna do a thing to stop it.” The class erupted in laughter and I just sunk in my seat knowing exactly what was coming. “And y/n, I wanted to thank you for your opinion. I must be tough growing up with the struggles of upper middle class suburban oppression. It must be tough. But before you storm the PTA for better...lunch meat or whatever you well off girls fuss about, ask why they can’t get books written by a black man.” He finished his rant, staring at me. Waiting for a rebuttal possibly, so I gave him one.
“Angie Thomas is a black woman. And I ask for curriculum adjustments for more diversity in the books we read. I’ll be sure to specify my wishes next time. Anything else?” I had a few chuckles at my reply, most likely due to my overabundance of sarcasm and smartass clap backs. I wanted to know who it was but before I could, Mr. Morgan kicked me out. “Yeah, go to the office. You’re pissing me off.” I groaned, grabbing my bag and heading to the door. As I walked, I felt a pinch on my ass. Before I could really think about it, my textbook was connected to the culprit’s face. I lost all sympathy when I saw Joey rubbing the side of his face and glaring at me from the ground. Mr. Morgan was laughing hysterically in the front of the class while some of my classmates were gasping for air in their seats.
@thinkinghardhardlythinking
3 notes · View notes