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glacierruler · 17 days

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Patton Sanders Analysis

Taglist: @januscorner @pandagobrr @icycove @cutebisexualmess @oatmeal-stans-the-trash-rat

@part-time-zombie

Post Under the Read More, it is long!

This is an analysis of Patton Sanders. Putting this here right now, I relate to Patton Sanders a lot. This is of the official episodes, and not the Asides!

Patton Sanders is Thomas’s morality and emotions.

Very important distinction is that he is Thomas’s morality not The Morality. He is not the arbiter of right and wrong, he is the aspect of Thomas that was raised a certain way to believe that certain things were right or wrong.

Within the first episode, Patton is acting as Morality first. This is important because that’s how he always seems to act as first. He always tries to be Morality and then emotions. However, this is not beneficial.

In the first episode he asks Thomas, “What positive impacts do you inevitably hope to bring to this world?”

Thomas is surprised by this, as it seems that Morality is more of a comic relief character in the beginning in his eyes. While probably due to the fact that the series was not initially supposed to be more than a few episodes long iirc, it can also be taken another way. It’s a way to show that Patton is smarter, and does think a lot deeper than how he appears to. Because he’s always trying to be happy (as happy is a good emotion. We’ll get into emotions and morality in a bit). However, when Thomas notes that it is surprising for Patton to say something like that, Patton points to his and Logan’s glasses, noticing that they’re the same.

Why does he do this? What could he possibly gain from doing this? I believe this is because he doesn’t wish to be seen as the deep philosophical side, but as the Happy Pappy Patton (something he says in a later episode). Being deep like this could effect how the other sides see him, and (like all the sides) doesn’t want to be seen that way.

There are a few other things to note in the first episode, when talking about his flaws, Patton says, “you can be a bit selfish with your food and your other belongings.” Which is notably something that Thomas does, but in the section where they talk about his good attributes, the moral side states “you believe there’s good in everyone,” which is something that Thomas thinks. And it’s our first clue to just how hard on Thomas, and himself, that Patton really is. If you can say something you’re doing wrong morally but can’t say an action that you’re taking to do something correct, it begs the question, how hard are you one yourself?

Morality is learned, it is not something you’re born just knowing right off the bat. This is important, because it’s important to keep in mind that Patton’s views are Thomas’s views on morality.

In A New Year of Lying to Myself… In Song!!! Morality and Logic butt heads, Patton is attempting to use his sway over Thomas to have him learn to cook more, while Logan wants him to learn something new. Patton doesn’t seem to quite believe it when Logan tells him that Thomas has “cooked in the kitchen plenty of times” since the WAY TOO ADULT (way too adult), and asks for proof. And I’m struck with why, since Thomas is them wouldn’t Patton be able to see Thomas cooking? While Logan is Logic and contains information Thomas learns, like cooking (therefore it making sense that Logan would be perhaps a little more aware than Patton), Patton is at the forefront of Thomas’s morality. And he had deemed it morally good for Thomas to cook. It would be completely reasonable to assume that Patton would be aware of that. Unless the only reason he deemed it morally correct is because, and I’m quoting to the best of my ability since this is said when Roman, Patton, and Logan are speaking over each other, “The basic essential things, that you need to learn to seriously become an adult to succeed at adulting.” (Again, very much trying to hear what he was saying in order to get this quote, I may be slightly off on what he said). Based on this, he views it as something everyone who is an adult does and knows how to do. Which very much reminds me of how neurodivergents like myself mask. We don’t know how to do something and so we’re hard on ourselves for not being able to do it, yet it’s something that otherwise isn’t important to us or how we function. I think this is Patton’s views on Thomas cooking. He believes it essential to how Thomas can take care of and survive on his own, which is why it’s morally correct to learn, however it isn’t actually something he deems important enough to pay attention to.

Also Patton already has an aversion to lying in this episode. He doesn’t try to seem positive and upbeat in this, or attempt to be gracious to Thomas about New Years goals. He just agrees, not wanting to lie as that’s wrong but not seeing anything positive he could say in Thomas’s defence (which again, leads me to believe he is extremely hard on Thomas and in turn himself. This is corroborated in other episodes as well).

Thankfully Logic, Morality, and Princey reach an agreement of small goals that Thomas could make in that episode. (Which solves that episode’s problems, but not Thomas’s of being hard on himself, this is something I hope to revisit.)

One of the first times Patton encourages Roman, from what I’ve seen, is in I’M IN A DISNEY SHOW!! (I’m in a disney show!!) This is because Roman is excited about the fact that Thomas was in a disney show, despite being there himself. He was achieving his hopes and dreams, and Roman was excited. Virgil tells him “You were there… princey, we’re both factors of his personality.” This prompts Patton to tell Anxiety to let Roman express his emotions. While I agree with the sentiment, I think this is the first we see of the sense of emotions and morality feed into the ego. Which will end up being a problem (As we will discuss later in this essay).

Patton then proceeds to tell Thomas that “I just want to support you in everything you do. Plus I saw you had some leftover pizza?” While I completely believe the sentiment of that first statement is true, by saying he wants pizza right after he is undermining that first statement. And I think that’s because he only cares to the point of where Thomas is happy when it comes to Thomas’s hopes and dreams. (This is because he Morality and Emotions, this is Not because he Unsympathetic, I want to make this clear. While I am being critical of Patton, I am in no way shape or form calling him unsympathetic!) This interaction is proof that while Patton wants Thomas to be happy and morally in the right when it comes to how he’s happy he doesn’t seem to care.

In The MIND vs. The HEART (The Mind vs. The Heart) is when we get the confirmation that Morality is also deeper emotions and empathy.

I think that this bit of diologue from Thomas himself illustrates Patton’s constant struggle. “Dad guy. You encourage me to do what’s right and strive to do the most good in this world that I possibly can. And I appreciate that. But a lot of times I spread myself too thin. I also tend to make others a priority over me, and their feelings a priority over mine.” Patton is Morality, he has learned to put other’s emotions over his own. He has learned to put other people before him.

Another problem I believe Patton to have is not listening to others because he believes himself to always be in the right. He is morality after all, he knows what he’s doing, he believes that his default is to be good so therefore he is good. So in a lot of the videos, whenever he’s not specifically addressed, or has some sort of stake in it he tends to go off and do his own thing. If Thomas isn’t feeling bad, and if he isn’t doing something that is deemed morally wrong by Patton, then what is Patton supposed to do.

However, as seen in all of this, he is also Thomas’s emotions. He is not just how Thomas views right and wrong, but how he feels in each and every situation. Having to handle not only what’s right and wrong, but Thomas’s emotions is a hard job. But it’s the job he has. And he can’t be wrong, because if he’s wrong, if he’s in the wrong. Then Thomas is, and then Thomas is a bad person, in Pattons point of view. While one of Patton’s fears might be spiders, I believe an even greater one is if he was wrong the whole time, if because he was wrong and Thomas was wrong, that he led Thomas to be a bad person. And this is only really brought to the front by Janus. While the others tell Patton he’s being too hard on Thomas, Janus shows it in the form of Frog Patton hurting Thomas. I think one of the reasons it’s so hard for Patton to understand this is because he doesn’t want to be anything other than Thomas’s Happy Pappy Patton. Nothing more than the morality and positive emotions that keep Thomas upbeat. If he’s anything other than that then he believes he’s failed as a side. He solves the tinier problems without addressing the bigger ones because he didn’t understand what exactly he was doing wrong.

Yes, he had been told he was being overbearing, spreading Thomas too thin. But he was never told how detrimental that was, how wrong for Thomas it was. He just knew that he and Logan butted heads about it a lot because of Thomas’s schedule. After all, he can’t be wrong, he’s the moral side, the side that knows right and wrong. And Roman, Virgil, and Logan all enhance this idea so much! In Growing Up, they tell Patton to stick to knowing the difference between right and wrong, and then go and ask him for help. They consistently tear Patton down to Just Morality or Just Emotions depending on the video. And at the beginning of the series they barely listen to him as is. I think this fundamentally changes in both MOVING ON (Moving On) parts 1 and 2. This is where they start to realize he’s not just Morality or Happy Emotions. But Morality and All of Thomas’s Emotions in general.

“I feel guilty for still feeling this way for so long.” Patton doesn’t like feeling horrible, especially not for long periods of time. Possibly because he’s been taught that negative emotions are bad, possibly because it makes Thomas feel bad and he feels guilty. But with him being Morality as well… It makes it so that negative emotions feed into the Thomas Is Doing Something Wrong complex, meaning he has to figure out what’s going on and sort that out while dealing with, you guessed it, emotions! It’s a loop, a repeating pattern of events that he doesn’t know how to stop, and It Is Of My Opinion that that is because while Morality is something learned, after a while it feels like something that is engrained into your being.

There is also a habit of whenever Roman is feeling down or bruised of Patton going to and helping him. Which isn’t necessarily bad, however we don’t see the other sides do this nearly as often. In Am I ORIGINAL? (Am I Original?) Patton is the first to reassure Roman that content doesn’t have to be original, after Thomas tells him that he could never disappoint him. And then, in the very next episode, Patton is the only one reassuring Princey after his ego has been bruised. And I think this really sets up a sideline of Patton being there for Roman and helping him out, which makes Roman really rely on him a lot. This is also emphasized in The Sanders Sides 12 SIDES OF CHRISTMAS (The Sanders Sides 12 Sides Of Christmas), when all the sides are getting onto Roman’s song lyric for Virgil, and Patton has to be the one to tell all of them to be nice to the princely side. (Janus also uses this fact in Can Lying Be Good, to try to get Roman to side with him). Now this isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but if your source of ego is getting fed by only one facet of your personality that can end up being a devastating blow when that part is proven to be faulty or wrong.

While there have been attempts to reign Patton in, I don’t think he fully understood that how hard he was being on Thomas was ultimately harming him. As none of them were nearly bad as the events that transpired to get us to the Selfishness vs Selflessness and Putting Other’s First. “Roman I thought you fought for honor? Why are you pushing Thomas to be dishonest?” This is what Patton says to Roman about possibly lying to his friend’s to go to the callback. This seems inconsequential, but I wonder if Roman would have made the same decision had Patton not said that. In Putting Other’s First, Janus and Patton butt heads, arguing about Morality and Why People Should Do Things. And Roman takes Patton’s side. I think this is due to the fact that while he knew Thomas wouldn’t be happy at the wedding, he also ‘knew’ that it was the right thing to do because Patton is (Thomas’s) Morality, and Patton has to be right about this. Not only that but Patton has been there for him time and time again and he wanted to return the favor. Be a prince.

Yet Patton learned, by turning into a frog, that he was hurting Thomas. That while he might be doing what he believes to be Morally Correct, because of his actions, his beliefs, Thomas was being hurt. And he realized that what Janus was saying was true, and he was able to visualize just how badly he was hurting Thomas. But with how it ended up going down, it came at the expense of hurting Roman, of (I believe unintentionally) shattering the ego.

As per my first(not nearly as extensive) analysis, I said “Patton absolutely believes going to the wedding was the correct choice, but Thomas had been excited to be fulfilling his dreams of being an actor. And so the excitement of his friends getting married was dampened by the fact that he missed out on what could’ve been a dream job. And not only that, but now because Thomas is bummed about missing this opportunity, Patton feels guilty about the disappointment, because his friends are getting married and he should be happy and even excited about it. But he isn’t. And so, while morally Thomas did the right thing(according to Patton), because he isn’t happy about what’s happened, that essentially traps Patton in this circle of guilt. Guilt for the choice that Thomas made not making Thomas happy; and guilt for being at Lee and Mary-Lee’s wedding to celebrate and not being ecstatic for them.”

#glacier rambles #patton sanders #sanders sides #sasi #ts sides #thomas sanders sides #ts patton #patton #patton sanders analysis

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chameleon66 · 4 months

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Sanders sides Valentine’s Day headcanons

Author’s note: I decided to do Valentine's day headcanons on some of Sanders Sides' ships. I'm sorry if I didn’t include your favorite ship but there are only so many things I could think and write at the time. I promise I will write something new soon and please give me your thoughts on my headcanons. Happy Reading!

Logicality (Logan x Patton)

Patton spent most of his day in the kitchen cooking a special dinner for him and Logan which is about 40% actual food and 60% sweets because both of them have sweet tooths but Logan doesn’t usually allow himself to have any so Patton decided to spoil him

Logan bought Patton a shark Blanket for his bed with a hood and mittens sewn into it (Because believe it or not Patton’s favorite characters in Finding Nemo are the sharks)

Patton sets up the dinner in the imagination and Logan is so flattered that Patton put in all this time and effort into his gift and he’s also flustered because of how cute and affectionate Patton is being with him

After they finished eating they decided to go home and watch Big Hero 6 and Toy Story 2 on Logan’s laptop before they cuddled up in Logan’s bed and fell asleep

Roceit (Janus x Roman)

Janus gets Roman a new 300 page notebook to write all his award winning ideas in and spent a few days customizing it with all of Roman’s favorite musicals on the cover

On Valentine's day Janus couldn’t find Roman all day but in the afternoon he found a mysterious letter on his pillow inviting him to a ball in the imagination that night (I’ll give you three guesses who the letter is from)

That night Janus went into the imagination in a snake skin print suit and finds part of the imagination has been transformed into a huge ball room with a glass ceiling showing the night sky a self playing grand piano and Roman waiting for him in a bright red ballgown dress

That night the two of them danced, exchanged sweet words, recreated Disney princess and Disney prince scenes with each other and came back home around 7 a.m and fell asleep in Roman’s room

Dukexeity (Remus x Virgil)

Since both Remus and Virgil have problems with giving and accepting love they decide to do what they both do best, make everyone in the mind palace suffer (Playing pranks on the others) one example is them taking Logan’s stuff from where he last put them and putting them somewhere different (It made Logan think he was going crazy)

They also tainted Janus’s face mask with marker ink which caused Janus’s scales to be stained bright pink for almost a whole week after Valentine's day

But both of them targeted Roman the most, between placing a bucket of slime above his door which fell on him when he opened it or drawing on his face when he took a nap, they did it all to him (They didn’t prank Patton because Virgil refused to because Virgil doesn’t want to hurt a soul as pure as him)

After they were done pranking the others they hid under Virgil’s bed and watched youtube to avoid the others until they fell asleep under the bed together

Logince (Logan x Roman)

Logan spent most of the week before Valentine's day a stressed mess trying to figure out the perfect gift to give Roman because nothing he found ever seemed to be good enough for Roman so in the end he went with making something for him, a list of 101 things he loved about Roman

On Valentine's day morning he woke up for breakfast only to find Patton there not cooking but just sitting there as if waiting for Logan and when Logan asked Patton what he was up to, Patton just smiled and said “Not what I’m up to.”

Patton then handed a envelope to Logan and snuck out with a wink, Roman had planned Logan a scavenger hunt with riddles which then led Logan to Roman in the imagination who made a breakfast picnic for both of them with toast, muffins and Crofters jam

After they finished Breakfast Logan gave Roman his gift that Roman broke into happy tears at and they spent the whole day in the imagination hanging out with each other and experimenting with crazy ideas

Dukeceit (Janus x Remus)

Neither of them like Valentine's day, Remus because it’s a holiday dedicated to lovey dovey mushy gushy stuff and Janus because it’s such a commercial holiday that really serves no well known purpose

So instead they treat it like any other day but both of them kept subtly being a little more affectionate with each other like Janus making Remus a sandwich while Remus is busy making Thomas consider stupid things or Remus holding Janus’s hand under the table at breakfast

That night since everyone else is out of the house they cuddle up on the couch with wine and have a SAW movie marathon (Janus likes SAW because of the thought put into each trap and Remus just loves the idea of each trap and sometimes tests them on himself because he’s not real so he can’t die)

The both fall asleep on the couch in a wine induced sleep coma with Janus’s head on Remus’s chest and when Patton comes home and finds them he gently covers them with a blanket and switched off the TV (But not before being traumatized by a woman having her stomach cut open by a buzz saw)

Intrulogical (Remus x Logan)

Together they plan a full day’s worth of activities that start with a nice breakfast they made together early in the morning before Patton had woken up to make them breakfast, after Breakfast they went into the part imagination that Remus had full control over and they spent the whole day answering questions and experimenting

Since Remus has questions and Logan loves answers they came up with a full list of questions like “What would happen if you turned a human inside out?”, “Can sharks smell fear?”, “What acid dissolves human flesh the fastest?”, “Is it possible to jump from one plane to another and live?” just to name a few, they thought they’d try and answer them all

They came home in the evening covered in blood with ripped clothes, messy hair, and some mild(ish) injuries which scared the heck out of the others

After they lost consciousness Virgil, Patton, Janus and Roman took care of their injuries and put them to bed and both say they still would consider it a great day

Moceit (Janus x Patton)

Patton woke Janus up with breakfast in bed and bouquet of a dozen roses and they cuddled in bed until the afternoon afterwards

After they got up and ready Janus gave Patton his gift, a scrapbook of all the sides and pictures of all the fun moments they had together, the squeal Patton let out could shatter glass and then Janus was squished in bone crushing hug

What Patton finally let Janus go they went off on their planned date only to find Remus lurking around every corner and trying to but in on everything they were doing like the very intentionally third wheel he was trying to be (He didn’t have a reason for doing this other than just being bored and it was fun to watch Janus get angry) so they spent most of their date trying to hide from Remus and failing horribly to do so

Once they got home Janus locked him and Patton in the bathroom just so they could be alone for a while and not be third wheeled, so they ended their Valentine's day cuddling on the title of the bathroom with noise canceling headphones on to block out the sound of Remus banging on the door

Prinxiety (Roman x Virgil)

Virgil told Roman he didn’t want anything super grand for Valentine's day and that he wanted to keep everything lowkey which Roman surprisingly agreed to

On Valentine's day Patton took Virgil out for what he called “Friendintine’s day” but Virgil saw it was a poorly devised excuse to keep him out of the house while Roman was without a doubt setting up a surprise for him but he pretended to be unaware as Patton and him hung out in the imagination with Patton coming up with one excuse after another to keep them from going home

Once they got back to the Mind palace Virgil went to his room to find a pillow fort had been made on top of his bed and a tray of snacks had also been set out with Roman waiting for him his Beast onesie, Virgil was speechless but extremely happy that was made very clear by how his eyeshadow changed from back to a bright shimmery purple when he saw the display

After Virgil got changed into his skeleton onesie they took turns picking out movies to watch (Mostly Disney movies) and fell asleep around 2 am

Second Author’s note: Thank you for reading and whether you’re spending Valentine's day with a partner or alone, remember to take time to do something you love doing.

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multi-fandomedfreak · 11 months

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Fic idea: How might the Sides help with writer's block?

Authors note: I wrote Janus and Remus for this one!! Which is why this took a tad longer than usual lol

⚠️ Warnings ⚠️: Remus making dirty comments

👑 Roman 👑

-Oooh writers block with Roman is ALMOST non existent

-He’s creativity after all so he would come up with the most extravagant things

-Would definitely use this as an opportunity to spend time alone with you in the Mindscape place and create whatever came to mind to help inspire you

-DAYDREAM MODE ACTIVATED

-He’ll do EVERYTHING to help you beat writers block, which also gives him an excuse to be as dramatic as possible

-Aww I also feel like the moment he has an idea he doesn’t even say anything he just rushes to the nearest writing utensil and writes it down before he forgets

-Just know asking for Romans help with writers block will have you both exhausted but happy

-exhausted mainly because of all the running around and happy that you both got to do all that together

-You definitely got an idea about what to write

💙 Logan 💙

-ABSOLUTELY LOVES IT WHEN YOU ASK HIM FOR HELP WITH WRITERS BLOCK

-Obviously calm and collected on the outside but on the inside he is so darn happy

-It just makes him feel very important and will take it very seriously

-He’ll research various topics with you, look at art/pictures, take notes of things, etc.

-Expect so. much. info dumping.

-But hey it really does help with drumming up some good ideas

-By the end of it, you’ll have like more than 5 pages worth of notes to help you with your writers block

-He’ll somehow even throw out MORE ideas as he helps you write whatever it is that you’re writing

-Literally a human grammarly so he’s always pointing out where you can improve your grammar

-Likes to compliment certain parts of your work in order to keep you motivated tho

-If you drink coffee, your both probably buzzing off of the amount of caffeine you guys drank during the reasearch

🍪 Patton 🍪

-At first he’ll ask, “what’s writers block?”

-Once you explain it tho, he’ll try drumming up any ideas on how to help

-I feel like his idea of getting you inspired will be stuff like, talking a walk to maybe help clear your head or baking/ cooking something for you

-Probably takes you to his room hoping that all the nostalgic stuff he has in it will help

-He’s trying his best lol

-He’ll probably get distracted with the things in his room and has to be constantly reminded of the task at hand

-Somehow that helps?? Like seeing him organically do stuff and not trying to help you get inspired, helps with the writers block

-With Patton it just really depends if he does or says something that somehow triggers inspiration

-Gives you cookies and milk as you work once you get past writers block

💜 Virgil 💜

-Once you ask him, you both probably sit on his bed trying to think of something

-Till Virgil suggests you listen to some music that will help you

-He puts on ALL his favorite albums

-Puts on Paramore, MCR, Evanescence, and probably the soundtrack of his favorite musicals/movies

-Probably suggests watching some movies to hopefully get inspired

-Tries not to panic when it doesn’t seem to work

-But it does work since you both end up talking in depth about the movies and songs

-It ends up being a veryyyyy long conversation since he’s very passionate about his interests

-And you love listening to him

-Once you sit down and get to work on the thing you wanna write, he’s there sitting with you to help bounce ideas off one another

-Kinda like Logan, will be vibrating from the amount of coffee he’s drank

-Once you asked him to help with writers block, he helped you through the whole day

-And I mean, the whole day

-You’re just both very relieved you finally got through writers block

🐍 Janus 🐍

-“You must be truly desperate to come to me for help.”

-Ok Loki nobody asked for ur opinion

-Will reluctantly help (he would love to help he’s just being janus. he’s actually jumping with joy on the inside that you asked him for help)

-He’ll probably try telling you stories that are completely made up to hopefully get ur creative juices flowing

-Yes he goes through the effort to make up stories to tell you

-Probably will take you to the library to help research various topics

-Why not just look it up? Bc he likes the quiet atmosphere

-Not at all bc he wants to put actual effort into helping you

-He’s gonna be a diva about it tho

-Surprisingly is very keen on helping you get motivated and when you think about giving up, he simply won’t allow it

-He gets you up and running

-Probably promises to get you something as a reward for getting through writers block

-One of the few times he’s not actually lying

-Once you do come up with an idea, he’ll probably make little sassy remarks about your work

-Know he doesn’t actually mean it, he just says it on instinct

-Oh and your reward? He can’t bring himself to give it to you in person so he just leaves it somewhere he knows you’ll find it

💚 Remus 💚

-Oh gosh, you almost regret asking him for help with writers block

-Bc he will go into gremlin mode and just do the most out of pocket things ever

-“To help your creative - and other- juices flow!!” he says

-Immediately gets hit upside the head for that little comment

-But, anyways, if you need help writing some messed up stuff or something; he’s the best guy for the job

-Just imagine him being as extra as Roman but much more…disturbing

-He won’t stop making dirty jokes/comments through the whole thing

-But he surprisingly does a good job at helping you out with writers block

-Of course you both will most likely get sidetracked bc Remus is being Remus

-Just know you you’ll be both disturbed but entertained when it comes to asking Remus for help

#sanders sides #thomas sanders #thomas sanders sides #virgil sanders #logan sanders #roman sanders #sanders sides x reader #patton sanders #janus sanders #remus sanders #sanders sides headcanon #roman x reader #logan x reader #Patton x reader #Virgil x reader #janus x reader #remus x reader

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whichsandersside · 8 months

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poll submitted by Anonymous

#sanders sides #remus sanders #logan sanders #virgil sanders #patton sanders #ts logan #roman sanders #ts remus #ts virgil #ts patton #ts roman #janus sanders #ts janus #which sanders sides

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prince-rowan-of-the-forest · 1 year

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My opinions on the sides and their abilities to cook because why not I'm bored:

Patton can cook and bake quite well, he's the type of person who doesn't need recipes most of the time and knows how to make good food. He's tha main cook in the mindscape. Hebakes better than hecooks and ultimately preferrs baking too, but he can and does do both.

Logan can cook but I put 'can' in italics because objectively he can but the moment you take his precise recipe away the kitchen is on fire. If he were to do a technical challange in the bakeoff they'd be carting him off on a stretcher. He also can't bake for the life of him, he has no clue why and it absolutely doesn't make sense

Virgil can cook ifhe absolutely needs to but he has so much anxiety surrounding the oven and the microwave that usually he just puts a poptart in the toaster and says fuck it. At most he'll cook mac and cheese or chicken nuggets and call it a day. This man will not go anywhere near an electric mixer for long enough to touch it let alone bake a cake.

Janus is the best cook in the mindscape, he stress cooks and stress bakes to an extreme to the point that when Janus is stressed the group are basically dining like royalty at a feast. He tends to go all out on making food fancy enough that it wouldn't be out of place in a gourmet resteraunt. However he absolutely refuses to admit any of this. Even when the other sides can clearly see him cooking he'll still deny it.

I left Roman and Remus until last because they are both outright banned from the kitchen. I've mentioned it a few times in fics but neither of them can cook. Roman somehow burned water and set the kitchen on fire somehow whilst making cake batter. He's increadibly accident prone and Patton decided to ban Roman from cooking and cut his losses very quickly. Remus is banned for probably obvious reasons, Remus is actually a surprisingly good cook if you let him try, his food just never looks good. Ever, and it rarely smells edible even if it is somehow good despite that. Even with this though he very ofte makes big messes and likes to use the kitchen for science experiments, thus banned.

And that concludes my headcannon rampage goodnight I'm going to sleep.

#sanders sides #sanders sides headcanon #patton sanders #janus sanders #virgil sanders #roman sanders #remus sanders #logan sanders #rowan rambles

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icy-cold-bitch-latte · 1 year

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How the Sides would comfort a trans reader who's feeling dysphoric

A/N: this is gender neutral so it can be read by any of my fellow trans peeps who's dysphoria has got them feeling down ✌✌

Warnings: talk of dysphoria, Remus in general lol

Patton

Patton gives you all the hugs, kisses and cuddles ever in order to cheer you up

He's very proud that you decided to tell him how you feel rather than bottling it up because he knows from personal experience that repressing your emotions does nothing but makes things worse

He's not the best at cooking but if you have a favorite go to comfort food that makes you feel better then for you he'll definitely try

He ends up wrapping you up in a ton of blankets and pillows and just lays with you on the couch for awhile

Roman

At first, Roman vows to vanquish the beast that's upsetting you...until he realizes it's not a physical threat you're facing, but a mental one

He tries to take your mind off it by telling you stories of his daring adventures, or by putting on your favorite Disney movie, whichever you prefer

He'll call you an enormous plethora of gender affirming pet names until you're basically begging him to stop, and even then he still refuses until you cave and admit what he always believed, that you're perfect in every way

Logan

Logan uses logistics to combat your insecurities by reassuring you that nobody has the power to tell you what gender you are or aren't, regardless of how you present

He makes to sure look up plenty of coping mechanisms and suggestions for how to deal with dysphoria ahead of time so he has ample knowledge and understanding for how to make you feel better

Not the best at comforting you if you happen to get emotional but he might give you a hug or something if it's clear you need one

Virgil

As a conscious being made up of anxiety, Virgil notices your panic and distress as soon as he sets foot in the same room as you (that's probably what urged him to seek you out in the first place tbh)

When you panic, he panics, but he tries to keep it together so you won't notice and get even more upset

He has several tried and true methods that always work to calm people down, so once that happens and you can explain to him what's up he understands almost immediately

If you want to talk about it, great, if not he's content to just listen to music with you and hang out until you feel better

Janus

You being upset, especially over a topic that's so serious, is not something Janus takes lightly

It may appear as though he doesn't care all that much at first due to his stoic expressions, but that's just because he's trying to think of the right thing to say

He may be the literal physical embodiment of deceit, but if you're upset he'll try his best to be honest with you about how much he cares

Brings out all six of his arms so you can have the most amount of cuddles and physical affection all at once

Remus

Remus's comforting skills leave a lot to be desired, so unless you can deal with him making the most random outrageous sex jokes in an effort to cheer you up it's probably best that you just spend some time alone for a bit

He's incredibly clingy however so it won't be long before he comes begging to you for attention, on literal hands and knees might I add

If you do let him stay with you when you're upset you should make it clear to him you're not in any sort of mood to deal with his shenanigans

He'll actually listen for once and the two of you end up pranking the other sides together until you eventually get bored and decide to watch some horror movies instead

Sanders Sides masterlist | 🏷 taglist: @iloveentrapta @feralwenis

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starshineandbooks · 9 months

Text

Some old sanders sides headcanons

Logan has a hard time cooking -he can! He just- follows the recipie to an exact T. And when the others are used to Pattons amazing cooking it's like- okay but not great

BUT Logan CAN bake. He makes the most awe inspiring deserts that are perfectly decorated. Like he could NEVER be on nailed it yes too good.

Virgil sleeps under 2-4 weighted blankets for a combined 80ish pound at the higher end. (Not projecting swearsies)

Virgil enjoys cross stitch and embroidery

Remus would like figure skating but use it to draw dicks on the ice

All the sides REALLY like star trek for different reasons. They can NOT agree on the best series

Remus and Patton prefer TOS star trek. Patton LOVES Uhura. Remus adores Mccoy (I'm a doctor not an escalator!)

Roman likes AOS and Kirk a lot

Janus adores lower decks and also Badgey

Logan and Virgil uses to prefer TNG but are shifting to Strange new worlds. Logan adores Spock (obvi) and La'an. Virgil likes La'an and M'benga

Remus has SEVRAL pet snakes

Janus may not always like the other sides (or ever depending on your own thoughts) but they're still part of Thomas. So he'll make sure they're functioning

Logan and Janjs probably have wine and cheese nights where they bitch together

#ssb rambles #sanders sides #logan sanders #patton sanders #roman sanders #virgil sanders #janus sanders #remus sanders #sanders sides headcanon

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part-time-zombie · 1 year

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Some assorted headcanons about the Sides because why not:

Patton is the best at baking. He loves it, especially when he can bake for the others (who love his baking and have fought over the last cookie several times). The same cannot be said when it comes to him cooking. There have been several fires in the kitchen...

Janus, on the other hand, is an amazing cook. The others would know this if he actuallly shared his food, which he will not. He did teach patton a few recipes out of spite once, though he'll never admit it and has sworn patton to secrecy.

While roman is great at singing, he isn't good at dancing no matter how much he practices. Remus can dance surprisingly well, and often does it in front of roman just to piss him off.

Virgil cannot sleep without having a true crime/paranormal podcast on in the background. Surprisingly, the nights where he sleeps without it are the times he has nightmares.

While patton is actually very near sighted and does need his glasses, logan actually has great vision and just wears glasses because he thinks they make him look smarter/cooler (he is right).

Sometimes an unsuspecting side will walk in on remus in a moment of uncharacteristic seriousness late at night. Logan has caught him watching an old black-and-white noir film with rapt attention (and zero innuendos), and was both intrigued and unnerved the sight. He still does not know what to make of it.

Virgil is the tallest side (because of thomas's heightened anxiety) but he slouches alot, so most people think logan is the tallest.

Janus actually doesn't like to sing (at least not in front of others). Patton is the only one who has actually heard him sing.

Remus knows nearly every weird/gross fact about animals and will usually bring them up right when someone else just took a bite of their food just to see their reaction.

Janus doesn't actually have scales. He added them by shape-shifting to create a more striking look and is now too deep in the lie to back out.

Remus is red and green colorblind, and his green outfit was actually a failed attempt at copying roman.

Virgil is scared of heights. Logan is scared of the ocean. They have only shared their phobias to each other.

#sanders sides #thomas sanders #remus sanders #logan sanders #roman sanders #virgil sanders #patton sanders #janus sanders

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i-am-bitterly-jittery · 1 year

Text

#patton sanders #sanders sides #ts sanders sides #Thursday polls

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lovelylogans · 10 months

Text

the parent trap

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN: small world and getting smaller

Janus is officially the father of the two most troublesome twins in the galaxy.

⁂

Virgil stands by the door, arms crossed and hopefully backing up Janus’s sense of Stern Parenting.

Virgil isn’t sure how well he’s doing from how he’s collapsed on the couch, his hand over his eyes.

“One of you,” Janus says, pointing vaguely in the direction of the twins, where they’re seated side-by-side on the opposite couch. “I’m not sure which one at the moment—but one of you told me your father knew I was arriving here today.”

The twins exchange a look. Virgil narrows his eyes.

“And I’m here to tell you,” Janus continues, “that the man I just saw in the elevator had absolutely no idea he and I were in the same country. Let alone the same hotel.”

The twin in the white jacket—Roman, unless they’ve somehow managed to swap clothes between Virgil seeing him last—slumps lower on the couch, looking cowed.

“You saw Papa already?”

“Yes I did,” Janus says hotly. “The man went completely white-faced, like I was the bloody ghost of husbands past! Can one of you get something cold for my head?”

Roman rushes from the couch to the small bucket that Virgil’s already filled with ice, grabbing a small washcloth at random and dipping it inside, then wringing it out.

“I mean,” Janus continues, at last removing his hands from his eyes and rolling to face the boys, “don’t you think I’ve thought about what it would be like to see your father after all these years?”

The twins exchange another look. Virgil feels something finally, at last, click to place in his brain, and his eyes go wide.

Oh, God. They’re really going through with it.

“Well, let me tell you,” Janus barrels past any response either boy could have, standing to pace, “me waving like a mindless idiot while Patton Parker’s got his arms wrapped around another man is not exactly the scenario I had in mind! Thank you, darling, you are not off the hook,” he adds, accepting the washcloth that Roman gives him.

And then the door to the bedroom opens.

And then one of the most visually pleasing men Virgil has ever seen steps into the room.

“What’s going on here?” The man says mildly, then, “Roman!”

“Uncle Logan!” The one in the white jacket who is absolutely Roman cries out, leaping to his feet. “I’ve missed you—put her there!”

“Erm?”

“Handshake, Uncle Logan,” Remus elaborates, looking amused, “It’s American, he means do the handshake” and Logan smiles down at his nephew.

“But of course,” he says, and grasps Roman’s hand in his, shaking it up and down once, twice—

And they progress through a handshake, almost quicker than the eye can take in all the details—clapping and slapping of hands, bumping of hips, shaking of fingers, grinning at each other, Logan’s eyes shining with some restrained semblance of fondness down at the boy that Virgil’s grown to care for so deeply.

Oh no. Oh no, his bond with the children—it’s making him hotter.

“Oh!” Logan says. “Excuse me, I didn’t realize we had guests—erm, Logan James. I’m Janus’s cousin. How do you do?”

“Virgil Schemmenti—I’m Patton’s best friend slash professional hanger-on,” he says, then, dryly, “I hope it’s okay if I don’t know the choreography yet.”

Logan simply smiles, and Virgil clasps his hand in his.

His hands are soft, well-moisturized, and warm, sliding smooth where they meet the calluses and little burn marks Virgil has earned via cooking and helping out around the vineyard. The entirety of sensation of his body seems to narrow down to where they’re clasped together, to a sort of soft, contented quietness in the back of his brain—the pleasantness of his hand, gently but firmly cradling Virgil’s, the bare and simple pleasure of touch…

“Boys,” Janus says, and both Logan and Virgil drop each other’s hands quickly, turning their attention back to the situation at hand.

Oh, Patton is going to be so smug, or at least as smug as he knows how to be. How pretty Janus is this, how the James genes must be impeccable that, Virgil had sighed and scoffed and nodded along all these years, and now here Virgil is crushing on the cousin.

“You are going to tell me why you lied and brought me here without telling your father.”

“Were they?” Logan says, adjusting his glasses. “Erm, excellent. Virgil and I really ought to give you some privacy—perhaps I should see you to your room—”

“Oh, perfect,” Virgil says quickly, “We can go on over there, check out the mini-bar situation—”

“Wait,” Janus says, and his voice thunders through the room so powerfully that both Virgil and Logan freeze in their tracks.

“Does everyone here know something I don’t know?”

“Dad,” Roman says, and his voice is very gentle. “Papa’s getting married.”

All of the fight goes out of Janus’s face, his expression gone from stern to shell-shocked in an instant. He collapses back onto the couch with an audible gasp, his hand going over his mouth.

He looks paler now than he has the whole time he’s been near-woozy with liquor.

“To Cruella de Vil, he’s awful, Dad,” Roman wheedles. “We can’t let him go through with it, we simply can’t!”

“He’s awful, really, all wrong for him,” Remus says, picking up the thread. “And the only way he won’t marry him is…”

Remus hesitates, looking back and forth, before he nudges Roman in the ribs. “You tell him. You know him better.”

Roman crosses from one couch to the other, taking Janus’s hand in his.

“...Is if he sees you again,” he finishes warmly, with a dreamy sort of sigh that tells Virgil that, of the pair, Roman is absolutely going to grow up into exact same sort of hopeless romantic that Patton is.

Virgil tugs lightly on Logan’s shirt sleeve, and, once his attention is caught, jerks his head toward the door. Logan nods in agreement, and the pair of them start inching away.

“Wait a minute,” Janus says incredulously, looking back and forth between the boys. “You’re not seriously trying to set me up with your father?!”

“Actually, we are,” Remus says.

“You’re perfect for each other!” Roman insists, clutching at Janus’s arm.

“Hold it!” Janus says, and both Virgil and Logan freeze in their tracks.

“Okay,” Janus says tightly, then, firmer, “Okay. Let me say this loud and clear, since clearly none of you understand it. Patton Parker and I have absolutely nothing in common… anymore.”

“Um,” Remus says, raising a hand, and then promptly lowers it when Janus shoots him a fearsome look.

“Plus,” Janus barrels on. “In case you haven’t noticed, he seems extremely content with his—his long-legged, tight-trousered, clinging fiancé. And the pair of you will explain to your father that I am here for one purpose, and one purpose only. And that is to switch the two of you back and rearrange our custody schedule.”

“That’s two things,” Remus says helpfully.

“Remus Parker!”

“What? It is,” Remus complains, then, twisting, “back me up, Uncle Logan, that’s two things.”

“Listen to your father,” Logan says, avoiding the question entirely.

Virgil presses his lips together to keep from smiling, and instead he nods somberly at the boys in an attempt to impart some level of Adult Seriousness upon them.

He has the feeling it won’t work for long.

⁂

Patton’s heartbeat has been roaring in his ears the entire elevator ride.

“Uh, hey, Maddox,” Patton says, catching his fiancé’s—yes, his fiancé, pull yourself together, Parker!—hand in his. “I’m gonna run downstairs for a couple minutes—see if I can catch the kid, give him a spare room key, walk around a bit, clear my head.”

“Clear your head?” Maddox says, at last turning from where he’s been inspecting his face in the mirror. “What do you have to clear your head about? Is something wrong?”

“Uh, no! No, no,” Patton says. “Everything’s perfect—” a kiss pressed quickly to Maddox’s cheek— “I just gotta go. Um, shake off some nerves.”

“Nerves?”

“They’re your parents, Mads, I want to make a good impression,” he insists. He should make a good impression, he does want to make a good impression, he’s not lying, it’s just—

“We’re still going ring shopping after lunch, right?”

“Ring shopping?” Patton says, hand on the door, then, “Right, of course! For the wedding. Um, yeah, ‘course. I’ll see you there—here—I mean—downstairs.”

He quickly opens the door and slips out before he can stick his foot in his mouth anymore than he already has, darting down the hall.

“Hey, Pa,” his son says, trundling down the hall. “What’s up?”

“Uh, nothing! Nothing, Roman,” he says, reaching out to squeeze his shoulder. “Hey, did you…?”

Roman blinks his big brown eyes up at him.

“Nothing—never mind,” Patton says hastily. His kids would never pull one over on him like that, right? Not with something so serious. “Do me a favor—keep Maddox company, will you?”

Roman nods.

“Thanks so much,” he says, then, hesitating, wheels back around.

“Do I look okay?” Patton says, tugging at his suit jacket. “Like—presentable? You see me and can’t tell I’m a man who collects ugly sweaters, right? I look like a—a serious, well-adjusted person who’s a proper adult?”

“You look fab, Pa,” Roman says. “Absolutely fab!”

Patton reaches over to squeeze his son’s shoulder, then he resumes his run back to the elevator.

Is he here? Is he really, really here?!

⁂

Remus hums to himself vaguely as he wanders the lobby, trying to think of the best way to really push stepfather-to-never-be’s buttons, when the elevator door opens and a familiar face comes barrelling out, adjusting his tie nervously.

“Pa!” He blurts out, before realizing he maybe shouldn’t have brought attention to himself.

“Rome!” Patton says, then, “hey, how’d you get down here so quick? I thought you were going to keep Maddox company?”

“I was?” Remus says, then, “I mean—yeah, I was! I think he stepped out of the room, I was just looking for him…”

Then, unable to help himself, he leans in for a quick hug around his stomach.

“It’s gonna be great, Pa.”

“Aw,” Pa says, hugging him back. “Thanks, kiddo, I really appreciate the pep talk—oh! I completely forgot when I ran into you upstairs. Here’s your room key. Why don’t you go on up and make sure nothing’s malfunctioning? And grab your jacket again, too, it might get chilly later.”

Remus accepts the shiny gold key, turning it over in his hands. “Sure,” he says, and pockets it. So he has run into Roman, then; it’s probably a good thing Roman’s kept his jacket zipped up.

“Great—thanks,” Pa says, and he’s off again, charging through the lobby, head turning back and forth, obviously looking for someone.

Remus grins to himself. Mission accomplished. He approaches the elevator and mashes the button as many times as possible within ten seconds as he can, humming some old song his Pa has on some of his cassettes.

Let’s get together, yeah yeah yeah, why don’t you and I combi-ine…

The elevator door opens, and Remus waits to step on as a man clad in black steps out, ignoring the presence of the world around him, inspecting his makeup in a compact.

“Have you seen your father?” The man asks, snapping shut the compact.

Remus blinks at him. “You talking to me?”

“Who are you, Robert DeNiro?” The man says snidely, and oh. Remus sees. “Yes I am talking to you.”

“Maddox,” Remus sneers, then, “yeah, I just saw him.”

“Well, hel-lo?! Where is he?”

“Oh,” Remus says. “He went thataway. I think.”

Remus narrows his eyes at him as Maddox cranes his neck to look down the hall; he’s wearing an icily blue suit jacket over whatever little outfit he’s put on to try and snare Remus’s father. Sure, he looks pretty—his hair is coiffed within an inch of its life, his skin is suspiciously smooth and lush in a way that screams of some kind of product—but Remus knows. Oh, Remus knows the sort of devilishness in a person.

Because he aspires to have it too. Except not like that—Maddox’s brand of evil is just too lame.

“What are you staring at?” Maddox snaps.

“Nothing,” Remus says, letting his lip curl up in disdain. “You’re just very pretty. That’s all.”

Maddox rolls his eyes. “Don’t tell me you’re going to break your rotten streak and suddenly be nice to me.”

Oh, boy, Maddox thinks Roman’s been on a rotten streak?

“If you see your father,” Maddox says, striding off, “tell him he’s late, and I’m waiting.”

He makes it sound like the biggest sin in all the world, to keep Maddox Blake waiting.

“Whatever you say,” Remus mutters under his breath. “Petruchio.”

⁂

Janus understands that Remus said that nothing that he could be given would speed this whole aftermath of vodka thing along, but also he’s eleven and a dratted little troublemaker and Janus is a bit ticked at him at the moment, so he’s decided not to believe him and seek out his own cure.

Which led him very handily to the hotel bar. So many people said hair of the dog, some semblance of it had to be true, didn’t it?

“Here you are, sir,” the bartender says, sliding across some… concoction in a tall glass. “This’ll cure anything you got. Just don’t ask what’s in it.”

Janus makes the fatal mistake of sniffing it and then promptly gagging.

“Probably shoulda warned you about that, too,” the unflappable bartender says cheerfully, then goes about collecting abandoned glasses, clearing places for other unfortunates who would find themselves at a hotel bar before noon.

Janus takes a deep breath, plugs his nose, and goes about drinking as much of the foul stuff as quickly as he can.

It’s a deeply unpleasant affair. Janus thinks he’ll be put off any variant of smoothie for about a month after this.

But finish it he does, quickly sliding the glass as far away from him as possible, and goes about getting a water glass and trying his best to wash the taste of it from his mouth, drinking the entire glass of water just through that conquest alone.

“Ugh,” Janus says very quietly, patting his face with a cocktail napkin, then stands to get himself even more water, pausing briefly as a man in a sleek blue jacket sits a couple barstools away.

“Pardon me,” Janus says briskly, and goes to refill his water glass. Free water. Say what he will about the Americans, the invention of free water in restaurants is an excellent one.

“Martini,” the man in the blue jacket tells the bartender, briefly checking his watch. “Dry, please.”

Janus slides back onto his barstool, with his water and the lackluster presence of bar peanuts standing guard beside him. He eats one to help with the taste and wrinkles his nose. He didn’t even know peanuts could go stale.

He eats another.

“Your martini,” the bartender says, returning. “And your bill, Mr. James.”

“Thank you,” Janus sighs, though he thinks paying for that ought to be considered highway robbery and also perhaps a violation of the Geneva convention. He signs it and pushes it back to the bartender.

The man sipping his martini tilts his head, spots his signature, and his eyes widen, before he turns to face Janus more fully.

“You’re Janus James?!”

“Guilty,” Janus says, and he tries his best not to wince as the man lets out a squeaky sound of delight, promptly abandoning his barstool to sit directly next to him.

“I just saw a suit you designed in Vogue and fell completely in love with it,” the man gushes. “I faxed your office just yesterday, but they said you were out of town and didn’t know if you could make another—I can’t believe it! It’s fate!”

Janus decides to do the polite thing and not point out that he is out of town, and presumably on vacation, and therefore not working, and instead he simply nods.

“I’m Maddox Blake,” the man says, flashing a set of truly startlingly white and straight teeth at him, extending a hand. “How do you do?”

Janus accepts the hand with some bafflement. Americans.

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#my fic #my fanfic #tpt fic

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asksanderssides · 10 months

Note

Question for all you lovely people

How do you prefer your spaghetti? Meat sauce, meatballs, or just plain tomato sauce?

Patton: I love to make spaghetti with a homemade pasta sauce, meatballs and garlic bread! The four of us usually all eat together, and I like to cook for everyone.

Virgil: Patton's spaghetti and meatballs is the best, I don't really cook so I just eat whatever he makes.

Roman: Agreed, Patton always makes delicious food!

Logan: I concur, although I prefer to add a healthy serving of vegetables to my plate.

#sanders sides #roman sanders #logan sanders #virgil sanders #patton sanders #ts roman #ts logan #ts virgil #ts patton #asksanderssides

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adornesibley · 1 month

Text

IT'S GONNA BE MAY: a Newsletter

Reading: The Land of Lost Things by John Connolly, How to Sell a Haunted House by Grady Hendrix

Finished Reading: Horrorstör, My Best Friend’s Exorcism, and We Sold Our Souls by Grady Hendrix, The Secrets we Keep by Shirley Patton, The Vegetarian by Han Kang

Podcast: Unwell: A Midwestern Gothic Mystery

Playing: God Hand and Nier (Jank is Good, Jank is Life)

Making: Doom levels

Writing: Project E and *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧NEW THING*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧ (which I will talk about below)

Word Count: Word counts are just a way the patriarchy can arbitrarily muffle voices it doesn’t like… but it’s 167338

TLDR: I talk about my new short story anthology project, word counts and the desperation of doe-eyed newbie authors, the insular nature of TTRPGs and nerd culture jargon, glossary provided for her pleasure.

Firstly, new thing! *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ I’m working on a super secret idea which I’m going to keep secret until precisely … now. It can be summed up in five words: TECHNO HORROR ANTHOLOGY FLOPPY DISK. Take yourself back to a bygone era, where the hair was big and often mulleted (wish that trend stayed dead, crimped hair stayed away but mullets came back? WTF humans) to when everyone is reading their Goosebumps or playing with their Tamagotchis. Close your eyes. Can’t you hear the dial-up now. Smell your breakfast cooking in your George Foreman grill. I know I’m talking about a large year range but for most of us millennials the 80s and 90s is just a blob monster of slow computers and corded phones and Scrunchies and listening to the radio, waiting for your fav song to play so you can hit record on your cassette player. I will keep you posted here on the progress and continue to give hints as to the full plan with all the gory details of its taxonomy. For now, this is all you get.

Project E’s progress was not so bad. I’m actually really proud of this word count. I shaved off so much this month. I was productive AF. And yet I feel compelled to continue on. The average scifi novel length is up to 150k words and I’m still well above that. Then you go to the average DEBUT scifi novel length and psht… 120k. If I remove 50k from Project E, that’s a whole book on its own!

I’ll admit that sometimes, a book is really and truly longer than it needs to be, but let’s also admit that plenty of books get published that are CERTAINLY longer than they should be. I’m looking at you, Herman Melville! So to act as though this is an aspect which would make it impossible to publish a novel is disingenuous. The shit reality is simply that more words means more ink and pages, and publishers are scared of losing money, so unless you’re well established or the concept is a “sure thing” then they’re unlikely to give you the time of day.

I have no proof, and this is not a statement I’d backup in any legal capacity, but I’d imagine it’d also be quite easy to find a manuscript which says things you don’t like, and then force the author to gut it to fit your requested word count. Once it barely resembles its initial form, then it’ll be toothless enough to be allowed to get by. New authors are desperate to have their stories accepted. We’ll do anything. ANYTHING. This isn’t to say that Lit Agents and publishers are mustache-twirling villains. I’m saying that shitty people exist in every corner of society, and those folks would likely be happy to abuse their positions of power.

So, a month and a half ago I watched a video about the TTRPG community and its insularity. Well, technically the video was about ShadowDark, but Indestructoboy spent a significant part of the video discussing this problem. I’ve never considered how impossible it would be to understand folks in our community when we’re discussing games. “So I just got to try out a new OSR1 TTRPG2, it’s a Roll Under3 3d64 system with no Death Saves5, or HP6 and it’s entirely GMless7!” Just imagine for a second that you don’t have access to the acronyms or specialized jargon. That sentence would be word salad!

Shit, just TTRPG is useless to anyone not already in the community. Tabletop Roleplaying Games have the power to be an incredible tool for community building and a creative outlet, but by creating so much shorthand, we force folks to learn a tertiary language to even engage with the simplest examples of this style of game! I think that a good stop-gap would be a Glossary of terms in the back of tabletop roleplaying game books, but long term I think it’s pretty important to consider that maybe doing away with the acronyms at LEAST would benefit the community significantly. (Or if you’re gonna use them, consider explaining them somewhere in your post/ book/ video.)

youtube

Support weird. Support indie.

OSR either means Old School Revival or Old School Renaissance. What these means is up for discussion and debate, but the “Revival” side appears to be focused on literally reviving old-school games like Dungeons and Dragons 2nd Edition while the “Renaissance” side takes ideas from these old Tabletop game systems and adapts them to more modern game design sensibilities. OR AT LEAST THOSE ARE MY DEFINITIONS.

TTRPG is simply short for Tabletop Roleplaying Game(s) which generally involves a certain level of imagining the actions (theatre of the mind) of a character whom you embody in that game, where you must take on the role of someone who likely does not think or act like you would.

Roll Under is a type of system where you will be rolling dice to try to get a number lower than your character’s ability scores. (The numbers that represent their Mental and Physical aspects) If you do, you succeed, and if you don’t, you fail to complete whatever task you were attempting.

d6 is shorthand for six-sided dice, which is the cube dice most folks think of when they hear “dice.” In this example, there is a 3 at the beginning which tells you that you would be rolling three six-sided dice and adding them together.

Death Saves are a concept from Dungeons and Dragons. When your character loses all of their health points/ hit points (a number representing how healthy your character is) then they fall unconscious and are forced to roll a twenty-sided dice each time their turn comes around. If they fail to roll a 10 or higher, then they have a “failed” death save. If they roll a 10 or higher then they “succeeded”. Traditionally you need three of either of them to finish being in this unconscious state. If you get three failures, you die, and if you get three successes, your character “stabilizes” but remains unconscious for some time. There are more rules, but those are for someone running a game to explain, this gives the basic understanding, I feel.

HP is short for Health Points or Hit Points. This tells you how much damage a character can receive before they fall unconscious or die.

GMless. So, first, a GM is a “Game Master” and their job is to narrate what happens around your characters and to roleplay pretty much everyone in existence that isn’t your character. In Dungeons and Dragons they’re called “Dungeon Masters” or DMs. So, a game that is GMless simply means that there is no Game Master and instead the players are cooperatively telling the story together, usually by allowing the outcomes of dice to tell them whether they are succeeding or failing at certain tasks.

#A E S T H E T I C #indie ttrpg #ttrpg community #writblr #horror #scifi #osr #floppy disk #tamagotchi #trapper keeper #am writing #authors of tumblr #publishing industry #strawman #Youtube #techno horror #short story anthology

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edupunkn00b · 9 months

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Decoherence, Ch. 5: Riding Through Purple Sage

Creative Commons 1.0 Public Domain

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“The blindness I mean is blindness that keeps you from seein' the truth.” -Riders of the Purple Sage by Zane Grey

WC: 1520 - Rated: T - swearing -

1838, March 9, Northern Wyoming, US

“Lo?” Remus grunted as he pushed up and craned his neck to look around the sun-filled room. Every joint creaked, shoulders tight like he’d slept wrong after a long day’s ride. Sitting up, he swung his legs over the side of the bed and fished around for his slippers. The wood pellet stove had gone out in the night and the old floorboards were fucking freezing.

The house was quiet… well, upstairs was quiet. He could just make out the lilting sound of Virgil’s voice out in the yard. It sounded like he was feeding the chickens. He squinted against the bright light spilling past the open shutters. Damn, how late did he sleep?

“Lo?” Remus pushed away the heavy blankets and shivered. A metallic clink against the wooden floor accompanied him when he finally mustered the will to stand. He looked down. Lo’s wedding ring was on the floor. “Oh, dear husband? Are you missing something?” he laughed, scooping up the ring and grabbing the robe hanging on the back of the door. He kissed Lo’s ring and frowned. It was chilled from the cold room. He tapped it against his lips for a moment, then dropped it into his pocket and headed downstairs.

“Tsk, tsk, tsk…” He chuckled as he swung around the stairwell, following the sounds of breakfast in the big kitchen. “You dropped your ring, L—” His feet stuck to the floor when Patton turned to greet him.

“No, I didn’t, Re,” Patton grinned and waved his hand back at him. A band of multi-colored agate caught the sunshine streaming in from the big bay windows. “Maybe it’s Jannie’s? He left early to take the wool into town, but he’ll be back before dark.”

Remus stared at the ring nestled in his palm, the polished metal now warmed against his skin. Right, of course it was Jay’s ring. Ro’s ring was silver, and Patton’s was stone from the river on the other side of the fields. And Remus’?

Remus’ had just been for the hell of it. Practice for when he’d helped Ro make his husbands’ rings. Right. What a weird thing to forget. He pocketed the ring, then shook his head and gave Patton his very best brother-in-law smile. “Is that coffee I smell? I sure could use it today.”

After a little more fussing from Pattycake than he really needed—but fuck all if it didn’t feel good to get a little spoiled from time to time—he and Virgil helped clean up after the feast he��d prepared. Patton had started cooking early, with sourdough and eggs and fresh jerky for Jay to take on the road. Remus had sent him off enough times to practically see the way he’d demure the offering at first, then pretend not to notice when Patton snuck a bundle of goodies into one of the horse’s packs.

Then, after Jay left, it looked like Pattycake had just kept on cooking. Chili was already simmering at the back of the stove, the mouth-watering aroma of cayenne, cumin, and kidney beans melding and filling the air. A sack of cornmeal sat on the counter, promising a fresh pan of cornbread for tonight.

They’d be eating good today.

Cleanup done, Virgil joined Ro to check on the foals and Patton had gone to tackle that loose step out on the porch, so Remus snuck a second cup of coffee before heading out to the workshop. It wasn’t until he’d gotten to the door that he noticed he’d filled two cups, his own usual with cream and sugar, the other black. The fuck?

It took a bit of wrangling, but he got the door open and went inside. He set the mugs down on the corner of the table and stared at them for a minute, then threw back the black coffee. It wasn’t bad and it smelled… it smelled kinda nice. Warm and… homey. Maybe part of his brain just knew if he was gonna make any sense of this busted generator, he’d need all the help he could get.

He was elbows-deep in the guts of the machine, twisted over the back of it to try to keep one hand on the rotor, the other tightening the crank when Virgil’s little voice called from the doorway. “Uncka Re?”

“Fuck,” he swore, spanner clanking to the floor. “Hey, you didn’t hear that,” Remus called back over his shoulder.

“Of course he didn’t,” Ro laughed behind him. “Just like the time you touched the wrong end of the poker.” Remus turned and Ro was standing right behind the kid. Virgil had both hands over his mouth, stifling his laughter. Ro didn’t bother. “Here,” he said, setting down a covered plate. “Pat was worried when you didn’t come out for dinner.”

“What?” He dragged his grease-covered hands down the front of his apron and looked out the window. Yeah, the sun was already casting long shadows out in the orchard. “Fuck, Lo, how long have we—”

“Woe’s not here,” Virgil whispered, shaking his head as he looked up at him with big, teary eyes.

Remus stared at him. “Whaddya say?”

He crouched down and held Virgil’s hand, but before the little boy could answer, Ro nudged the plate toward him. “You’ve been in here too long, little brother. Have some dinner or Pat’s bound to come out here and feed you himself,” he warned, hefting up Virgil to sit on his hip. “And you could use a nap, huh? No woes to be had here, Virge.” He waited until Remus had sat on the floor and pulled the plate onto his lap. “Come out for supper, okay? It’ll be too dark to work out here by then anyway.”

“Not if I get the generator working,” he mumbled, still chewing. Patton had managed to turn the extra cornmeal and gravy and some of the leftover sausage into a flavorful hash. Remus’ stomach grumbled happily. He was hungry. “Hey, tell Pattycake thanks,” He nodded, stabbing another forkful. “This is really good.”

“I will,” Ro smiled. Virgil was already getting those cute little sleepy eyes, lids popping open when he realized they’d closed. “Imma put him down for a nap then run the horses before Jay gets back.”

Janus returned home just before dark, and both Ro and Pattycake revealed their relief in the way they showered him in attention. Even Virgil was calmer than usual, listening when Janus regaled them with tales of Shoshone City, of the tribes that thrived there despite the young US government’s attempts to obliterate them.

Tucked away in the mountains, the nation had managed to evade the troops that had led the way for eastern ‘settlers’ tromping through. It wasn’t easy to find their land, and not many survived attempts. It had taken the family a long time to earn the nation’s trust.

The mountain rams that thrived in the Shoshone nation’s rocky bluffs had a different coat that the ones they raised at the ranch, not to mention the traveling merchants wouldn’t sell the nation arms even if they’d sought them out. But when Janus turned up with his Anglo-Saxon features and a winning smile, he was more than able to scoop up as many guns and boxes of ammunition as he wished to purchase.

And Janus was more than willing to exaggerate the size of their little family and buy whatever the merchants would part with to help ensure the Shosone were better armed than any scouting US troops might be ready for. Their relationship with the tribe made for fair trading. And good allies.

When supper was finished, Remus cleaned up, shooing the others off to enjoy some quiet time—well, as quiet as getting Virgil settled for bed could be—before he moseyed off to his own room.

He’d forgotten to close the shutters and the darkened room was chilled when he got upstairs. A bit of starlight peeked through the clouds, so even after he lit the pellet stove he kept the shutters open, just a crack to let in the silvery light. He stripped down to a pair of long johns, and something hard plinked to the floor and rolled under the bed.

Crawling on his belly, he reached and fumbled in the dark until his fingers grazed smooth, warm metal.

The ring.

How could he have forgotten it? He snatched it up and shimmied out from under the bed frame and sat on the floor, staring down at the little circle in his palm. The ring was as big of a mystery to him now as it had been when he’d first seen it that morning.

But that was the thing. Remus knew this ring. It was familiar, the size, the weight, the glint of it in the half-dark room. He just couldn’t figure out what the fuck he was doing with it.

Without really being able to explain why, he put the ring back in his pocket and carefully folded his trousers, then set them on the chair next to his bed. Then he peeled back the covers and huddled under the cold blankets and slept.

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