#but like. it's almost all background characters you see what we mean. we're a home for random blorbos that no one pays attention to | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

blackjack-15 · 5 months

Text

sydcarmy breakdown 2X03!

opening with a futility montage for syd -- tight shots for her as well, but centered on her rather than to the side like carmy's? predicts evasion for carmy and head-on tackling of anxieties by syd. business as usual for these two

the BEAUTIFUL widening of the frame from carmy blitizing the crap outta some nuts with his knife, alone in a kitchen, grey sweater blending in with the rest of the background, to show syd in bold tints -- carmy's black and white, note, while he's in a "muddied" version of his colors -- is insane. establishing the lone man, the stress, and then to widen it to show syd and have typical banter start? i see you i see you

"you know what most restaurants suck at?" "how much time do i have to answer that question?" carmy is so, so dry, and i adore it.

THE COPENHAGEN CHEKOV'S GUN. VINDICATION.

them finishing each other's thoughts and sentences is so beautiful here, the way that he can follow her train of thought without missing a beat, the way that he doesn't find copenhagen a "wild" suggestion at all...it's beautiful. these two really are at their best in a small space, alone, with nothing directly hanging over them

"happy?" ohhhhh that's a loaded bit of dialogue. happy with the food? happy with the agreement on sending marcus to copenhagen? happy being there in his kitchen? syd of course takes the most literal interpretation, but bless her, she always does

"you marinated it for too long, but it's okay, though" "i mean it's not, it's twice in a row" "that's why we're doing this" carmy's best aspect by far is his ability to never make the exact same mistake twice, and to incorporate what he learns from others into his important relationships (especially syd). he knows he futzed up by not telling her what her risotto/cola ribs recipe was missing, so he comes out of the gate here with it. he feels bad for yelling at her after a mistake, so he offers support and a way to move past it, to normalize it as part of the learning process.

oh. okay this is breathtakingly vulnerable for syd in a way we really haven't seen yet.

syd is kinda thirsty for praise, especially from carmy -- not a bad thing at all, it's a very neutral character trait. but here, instead of staring wide-eyed at him and pretending she doesn't care (like when he doesn't eat when she preps family in s1), she voices it -- "you're sending me home?" you can almost hear the implied "did i do that badly?". it's a very vulnerable thing to say for syd, who tends to attack things head-on

look at her face there. she is honestly worried, but she's willing to speak up, she's more comfortable and confident in her and carmy's relationship than she was in s1

"no, i'm not sending you home, i'm sending us out for...inspiration" first. just tell your pretty friend that you like her and wanna go geek out about food together, carmy. i know it's not Repression Chic, but. honestly.

second, he's demonstrating that he knows how syd will take this -- how she does end up taking it, by the irritation at herself that she displays here. he knows she's impatient -- with everything and everyone, including herself -- so he tries to show her that this isn't a fault thing, it's just what they've gotta do

and when she doesn't get it and he knows she's mad at herself? "and syd?" "...yeah?" "this really was almost perfect." again, he's learned from the cola ribs and risotto. this conversation is a great mirror to that one, where he starts with praise (it's tremendous) and then tells her "i didn't say it was perfect" as a follow up. he starts with the critique, assures her that it's alright, and then, knowing she's unhappy with herself, praises her.

It doesn't take, but he's doing it right. which means, since carmy opens the episode in Repression Town, things are about to go to pot

#the bear #liveblogging #2X03 #dinner break but hoping to be back in a little bit #but hey! back on the wagon!#also carmy is so friggin soft with her here i'm crying #and he has another sweater than the trauma blue swater!!! it's not a Good sweater color-theory wise but #but it's a sweater!

21 notes · View notes

emblazons · 1 year

Note

you've been writing a lot about parentified Mike lately, and while I appreciate it, from a story perspective I just don't understand why.

Maybe its just because I'm an elmike truther, but it really doesn't make sense to me why they would put such an unpleasant aspect into their friendship or romance when they could have just had her upset at him over Max's death or not sharing interests? With steve and nancy they broke up over barb and nancy wanting something else which made of sense without making steve "parent" her. idk. Maybe you're the wrong person to ask lol I'm just thinking out loud

I mean. Maybe I'm not the best person to give insight into why the duffers do what they do, but I can give why I think they did it?

Forewarning: this got really long, apologies lmao

Honestly (and take this from an out-of-universe perspective): I think they're fully aware of the strangeness of El as a character, and how she has a lot of narrative/personal "growth needs" that other characters don't just by nature of her background. She even from the pitch is referred to as "the outsider," and all of her arc, not just the romantic one, has been centered around finding a 'home' in the world, on top of finding the family she lacked before.

This, I'm almost certain, is why she always ends up on different paths than every other person she interacts with—she started with almost no sense of self as an individual, which means a sense of "self" has to be built and discovered (and remembered) for El in a way it already has been for our other characters. Max, Mike, Will, Dustin, Lucas—all of them have interests and desires, a sense of family (good or bad), know what they enjoy, and are evolving as they go along...but El didn't at the start of ST beyond lab trauma, which is why The Duffers have centered almost all of her character growth since then around discovering where she came from & who she wants to be.

With Mike though...there is an entirely different set of relational and character needs that have to be addressed. With Mike, the main struggles he has (from the pitch, again) are with insecurity, his belief that a girl will resolve that insecurity, his feeling valueless unless he can do something for the people he loves (almost like 'earning his place' in their lives) and his (almost certain) queerness...combined with how he is, at the end of the day, just another "everyman" guy.

Unlike El, Mike has some sense of personhood, his own established friends and interests and a home—but he doesn't feel like he has a place he's intrinsically appreciated, because (for whatever reason) he feels who he is inherently inadequate. Its why every season (and every time we hear Finn dig a little into Mike's character) we hear about Mike trying to serve others and "feel needed again," despite being hesitant to let them in—he desires unconditional acceptance, and to be valued for who he is inherently...while also being terrified to let people in enough to see him (lest his core identity be rejected).

When Mike and El were just friends, it was easier to sort them out as some version of "equals;" we all have friends who are in different life phases than us, or who have different needs we're trying to walk alongside as they try to meet them, which is why their friendship is cute in S1. With actual romantic partners though, we introduce an element of "trying to get your needs met" with the person you're most closely involved with...and for Mike and El, that means blending "a nebulous sense of self and desire to find an identity + family" with "a desire to have a girl fill a sense of inherent unworthiness," which, as most of us can see, leads to disaster.

Basically: From the snowball onward, writing romantic mlvn meant exploring what happens when you mix what El is looking for with what Mike tries to do to feel valued...and The Duffers have decided (rightfully, I think) that this means Mike is going to (consciously or not) move towards becoming the things El lacks to "become valuable," aka: protection from the "bad men," someone who is able to keep her safe from them, and...someone who can help her fill her needs for home + family, even though he is dramatically under-equipped at all of 12-15 to meet that task.

Because (especially s4) one of El's core needs has become a healthy father figure and found family, Mike is going to move toward behaving that way to be valuable...which means he's going to inadvertently conflate himself with the men who have also placed themselves in that role: Hopper and Brenner. It also means that Mike is going to feel that same "my child is leaving the nest" energy when El "grows up" and into herself as a wholly independent entity—which is why we see him say as much to Will in the van before the painting—

—and why it sometimes seems like El is almost "rebelling" against Mike as much as she has Hopper and Brenner over the seasons.

To your point though: all of this is inherently different from Steve and Nancy...because both Steve and Nancy had that sense of individual identity that El lacked at the start of the show. There was no space for a "parental" aspect to enter their romance in that sense—it was just two people who were incompatible, which is why they failed. Similarly, if Mike and El would have started the romantic part of their relationship at end of S4 points of the narrative—or even end of S3, after El had a second to come into her own with Max—things would have been a lot different for them, I think.

Only...that's not what happened, and...not how they're resolving Mike's insecurity about being inherently valuable. They broke Mike and El down romantically vis a vis this "she's looking for herself and he's trying to fill his own void with her" track, and then gave Will the entirety of the hand to soothe Mike's deepest fears instead, which is why Mike and El will break up and Mike will end up with and around Will more, because Will knows Mike’s heart and sees Mike as an equal even with his flaws...and loves him for it. 🤷🏽‍♀️

(There are also (in my opinion) fundamental thematic reasons they were working toward as reason why they wrote even the breakdown of mlvn that way (the themes of rejecting forced conformity, found family, and even embracing your love for things other people might think are childish are served by this "version" of the Mlvn to Byler transition) but. I can see why someone wouldn't like it if they were attached to Mike and El being close anyway lmao).

Anyway! I hope...that helps? Honestly that's just how I've come to understand it, and hope that offers some sort of solace or explanation. Its what makes the most sense to me anyway (lol).

Regardless, thanks for the ask! :)

#anti mlvn #elmike #stranger things #byler #mike wheeler #el hopper #st analysis #my st commentary #st writing #asks #the me tag #duffer brothers #the come back tag

77 notes · View notes

olderthannetfic · 4 months

Note

Re: https://www.tumblr.com/olderthannetfic/738859016693874688/why-do-some-popular-things-have-such-small & the person who replied to it in Another ask about Slay The Princess --

This answer was a facinating read as someone currently in the James Cameron's Avatar fan space -- i was only 8/9 when the first movie came out, and wasnt very into fandom Yet, but around the early 2010's when i Did get into it and went looking, there was almost Nothing to be found (and the few that Did exist were either short character studies written by some of the smartest people on the planet or troll fics), less than a 1,000 Total in the media tag on ao3 iirc?? And i remember feeling Fine with that, for the exact readon you both mentioned -- the first Avatar is a very well rounded film, no matter what everyone cares to say about it. It was Written to be a stand alone film, and bc JC is good at what he does, that Worked, and there truly wasnt much to write fic about besides Extreme au shenanigans or a few theoretic between-scenes, you know the type.

Then the second movie came out Last year and then the Game came out THIS and the fandom has just. Exploded. It's almost funny because so many of the younger fans, who were in it for x readering with the Sully kids, keep complaining about how "the fandom is dying 😭😭" in the tags the past few months and i just have to stare at it like pal just because we're not still shooting metaphorical fireworks about how much we loved the sequel and game doesnt mean we've all Moved On 😩 Im still Diligently mpregging the resurrected villain in my new longform crack fic thats probably going to be finished around the time the 5th movie comes out. Wee child you must Power through with us. Increase Your Fandom Stamina 💪😎🏃‍♂️!!!

But yeah it's just been Extremely interesting seeing how drastically things have changed, going from that completed, hard-to-write Wholeness from how compact the first film was vs the Flood of worldbuilding and lore and new characters we've been given (and have yet to Get, there may be some evil f/f fics beyond the horizon...) and how much the Sequel has contributed in the process of making Avatar easier to enjoy Casually, rather than as a "stereotypical", "extreme" strawman'd Avatar fan of yor (our elders who i respect most vehemently, for their help in understanding and writing the Na'vi conlang in all our fics 💪❤).

Even though the canon movies have a lot of problems, ive been luckiy enough to see the Fandom do what its always done best -- ive met wonderful people and Incredible artists while the life experience + background knowledge who can flesh out the areas of the concept that JamCam has yet to delve into, for whatever reasons he claims to have, and ive And others have felt moved enough by it all to start writing our Own incredibly self indulgent and sincere stories, within the same framework! Bc good lord it really is a sandbox. The moment you start diving into all the Implications of Avatar's universe, how the RDA is run, how Eywa works, etc etc etc.... jesus. ive lost so many hours of sleep reading real academic papers on Actual xenobiology (yes its a real thing, it both is And isnt what you think it is) for these movies, its nuts.

So some days like Now i just have to sit here like. Wow. We built this house And made it a home. and its Awesome. these asks made me want to gush about it 🥰 thats all! tysm!! Love this blog SO much, keep up the great work n have an awesome day everyone!!!

18 notes · View notes

mermaidsirennikita · 4 months

Note

Hmm... you know what you said about people not actually reading books they claim they've read? I feel like this can basically apply to most media. We're living in the tik tok generation attention spans and media literacy have never been lower. I know people who watch everything speed up or they fast forward through movies and shows or they watch those movie plot summary videos on youtube and facebook and count that as watching the actual movie! (big yikes) I saw my sister the other day watching Friends via tik tok clips despite the fact we have the whole show on dvd. This is how people consume media nowadays and it's worrying!!

It's true lol. And I won't pretend to be super invested in everything I watch, but if it genuinely doesn't interest me I'll just kinda stop and move on (when it comes to shows--with movies I usually soldier on unless it's REEEEALLY bad).

Me and my lovely lady friends have had a movie watching group for... like four years now (since right before the pando lmao but the pando made it a lot bigger) and I think that our commitment to watching trash, amazing, and mid things (we've given up on VERY few movies) has made me believe even more that you need to watch or otherwise something before really getting into the discourse. Like. I just said I watched The Bear season 1 (or near to it) and decided it wasn't for me. But I absorbed like, none of that show lmao. It REALLY wasn't for me. So while I can say "I didn't like The Bear", I don't feel like I consumed it, so I can only say on the surface level what didn't work for me, and maybe what I dislike about it on a cultural level (see: the way romance arcs are handled and discussed in the media).

But if I REALLY wanna get into critiquing? I'll watch it. Maestro was such a bad movie. So hard to watch. It wasn't even so bad it's funny, it was just bad. But now I can tell you that with an informed eye, because I WATCHED IT. And there have been movies that have surprised me, too! We just rewatched one of my all time favorite movies that only us and Adam Driver's wife have seen, The Man Who Killed Don Quixote. That movie is so weird! We only watched it because Adam looked good in it! And it's AMAZING to me. I LOVE that movie. I also love so many random little movies people trash. I hate movies like Wonka yet I get through them so that I can properly drag them with an informed heart.

I feel like a lot of people have really lost the ability to invest time and thought. I mean, I know this because Zaslav has asked creators to make things that don't require attention from viewers. For HBO Max, dude. When HBO has been the home of shows that offer so much more nuance than the initial dialogue, based on line readings, expressions. Succession's dialogue, for example, is practically incoherent at points on paper. I mean, Roman Roy sounds so sadistic on paper lol. But when you see Kieran Culkin deliver his dialogue, there is a totally different read, and you see what Jesse Armstrong was actually trying to convey.

I also think this is one reason (other reasons are cultural lol) that people give such surface level readings even when they do consume the content. Like, if you've trained your brain to only read into the most straightforward, "the dialogue and actions are the single truth, there is no other truth, there is no other meaning than EXACTLY what is being done and said in a literal manner"... You are almost never understanding what truly great work really means.

I mean, I just discussed this re: Dreaming of You. Derek Craven stealing Sara's glasses is not meant to convey "Derek Craven is a tool". That is a completely surface level reading. Kleypas is conveying "Derek Craven is obsessed with her" and honestly? Some character work about his background (he steals impulsively because it's super easy to him because even though he's rich now he had to grow up stealing shit because he was LESS THAN dirt poor) and the way he sees the world (he wants her, he doesn't think he can have her, he covets her, and what he does when he covets is take, through theft if need be). And I don't know, probably some subtextual shit about stealing Sara because she's engaged and shit, but that's more interpretive lol.

And I don't expect people to get as granular and obsessive as I do, because a) I am super analytical by nature b) I am A Nerd c) I write a lot so layered meaning is something I'm obsessed with. But like... in the above example, the MOST BASIC reading of "he wants her so he took her glasses because he doesn't think he'll see her again" is so obvious lol. Lisa leads you to that reading. I think he literally has internal dialogue like "he'd never see her again so whatever" while holding the glasses.

The same with the Succession example. If Roman shakes off his dad's weird abusive comments going "it's whatever" you shouldn't go "Roman is devoid of emotion" lol, you should be able to pick up Roman actually deeply caring based on the line reading and expression and a million other line readings before that.

I don't know, dude. Just take the time to consume shit. Not everyone does have a lot of time, I get it. So consume fewer things. Take more time. It's okay. You don't have to be on top of the cultural moment all the time, and if you're faking it to be in it, you're not getting the full experience anyway.

10 notes · View notes

inkedmyths · 1 year

Text

S1: E9 "Home"

Alright its been almost a month time to stop procrastinating this

Ohhh ~crunchy~ video quality

Oh a classic monster in the closet situation

Surprised the lady didn't get like dragged in right then and there

Its wild bc obviously in real life there's never anything in the closet but this is Supernatural in which case ofc there's something

Its not rats! Its something worse!

THE CHAIR. ITS MOVING. RUN KID

WAIT WINCHESTERS

H U H

0oh Sam and his ~prophetic dreams~

Me when someone's trying to talk to me as I'm drawing

Sam I feel like you should just say you're having spooky dreams

THERE we go

Dean did not sign up for his little brother being a psychic

Dean shut up its road trip back home time. Bitch.

THE CAMERA. THE MUSIC. THE DRAMA. This is so funny SPN is a soap opera actually

[ Crepe says that no one can handle Sam's bs in a calm and controlled manner. My opinion is no one can handle any of the Winchester's bullshit in a calm and controlled manner. ]

Awkward but I mean ok

Waiting for the kid to say "There's something in the closet"

YEP

Bros just yelling at each other bc they are so normal about this

Dean is so so bad with his feelings huh

[ Kayla asks if I am just realizing this. I am not. I was merely repeating a statement of observation. It seemed relevant. ]

Walks away bc he didn't want Sam to see him showing an emotion

NOT THE FUCKING CYMBALS MONKEY

NOOOOO

NO DONT STICK YOUR HAND

Oh I am not watching the screen no thank you

[ Kayla finds this reaction funny because "We've all been there". This is fair. And I know the man is just trying to do his job. However, he is, unfortunately, in an episode of Supernatural. If you are a random background character in an episode of Supernatural, you should never stick your hand in a thing that has many sharp blades. ]

I know where this is going to go

YEP EURGH arm smoothie

DUMBASSES THEY'RE PRETENDING TO BE COPS INVESTIGATING THEIR OWN DISAPPEARANCE

I feel like they would get farther is they just walked up to people and said WE'RE SAM AND DEAN

[ Melon says that we should play a drinking game, in which every time Sam and Dean do something stupid, you take a sip of a drink. Forst of all, I am still a year away from being able to consume alcohol legally. Second of all, this sounds like a surefire way to get alcohol poisoning. ]

Oh ofc. Psychic time.

"Your wife if crazy about you!" Turns around "His wife is banging the gardener" Incredible

LMAO CALLING DEAN A GOOFY LOOKIN KID

Oh shes good. Interesting

Sam as she's yelling at Dean is just :D

This poor lady its not her fault that the guy got blended

Yes something is starting. A TV show

UH OH

Is it giving the kid juice. Whats the deal

Oh its shutting him in the FRIDGE

UH OH

THE FRIDGE

MA'AM BEHIND YOU THE FRIDGE

OPEN THE FRIDGE

Thank god

NOT THE SHARPEST TOOL IN THE SHED

She's so much smarter than either of the bros

I have a sneaking suspicion the firey spirit is their mom or something

[ It is at this point that Crepe has no concept of how not to spoil an Ep and says I'm right. I figured, the plot beats seemed obvious, but come ON. The less you spoil the funnier my reactions will be. Let me enjoy my incredible powers of prediction in due time. ]

Oop there goes the lamp

Uh oh there is attenpted murder via flying objects

WOAH

Flashy light

MISSOURI MA'AM ARE YOY OKAY

Oh good

Holy cow that was something

SORRY ABOUT YOUR HOUSE THE GHOST DID NOT LIKE US

GET THE MOP AND DONT CUSS AT ME

There's like 10 minutes left what's gonna happen next

SHAKING

Is Sam outside oh yep there's the bros

go go go

FLAMING FIGURE

Oh bye bye Sam

DOOR SHUT how drama

Oh hes just getting punted

OH HI

Ur not on fire anymore whats up

Ghost fight! Ghost fight!

Oh yeah tragic sacrifice all that Sam buddy she was already dead

Alright so Sam is on some kind of bizarre spooky journey

AHA. THE BASTARD

YOU. MOTHERFUCKER

OLD MAN WINCHESTER WHATS YOUR FUCKING ANGLE

[ Episode ends. Crepe said it would be funnier if I added in the other's commentary. Kayla agreed. I hope this appeases you both. ]

#on the highway to superhell #sam is psychic or something. good for him! or sucks for him. whichever #obviously there's stuff to be said about the hypercompetent black lady trope but i do like missouri #john winchester looks like someone dragged him out of a dumpster

9 notes · View notes

readingrobin · 1 year

Text

February really is a hell of a month. In my corner of the Earth, everyone's getting a little tired of the cold, anxiously looking forward to the longer days that are right around the corner. It's also too short, full of too many expectations, like trying to live up to the plans you made for yourself only just last month. Thankfully, that also means it's over quickly and March comes in with the hope of spring. Can't wait for all the green to come back to the grass and the trees.

Total Books Read: 6

Total Pages Read: 2, 144 pages

Total DNFs: 2

Books Read:

Silver in the Wood by Emily Tesh - (Review) (4/5)

A Conspiracy of Truths by Alexandra Rowland - (Review) (3/5)

Cry Wolf by Patricia Briggs - I've been a longtime fan of the Mercy Thompson series and, despite having it for almost a good decade now, I finally picked up the first book in this spinoff series. I will say, I think introducing the main characters in a short story separate from this book wasn't exactly the best decision, as there's a lot of confusion around who these characters are and what the basis of their story is. I'm not a fan of authors introducing important plot or character developments in short stories apart from the main series, as it's a pain to track them down in these obscure anthologies and makes the full length book seem incomplete.

Coming into this new series, I couldn't help but do some comparing to Mercy's. A little unfair, I know, but sometimes it can't be helped. Anna doesn't really come off as an interesting, strong protagonist and, to an extent, neither does Charles, far cries from Mercy, who always gives a good range of personality. From the first page, Anna and Charles are in instalove, so their relationship doesn't go through any worthwhile developments other than "Hey, we're in wolfy love now, guess we don't need to do any more emotional work on our behalf." It's just….how do you make a relationship interesting when they're automatically together? What hurdles do they face? What doubts? What hesitation? Hell, Anna has gone through trauma from sexual assault and being passed around her previous pack like a broodmare and that's not even expanded upon or how it may effect her relationship with Charles. It just ends up feeling so hollow. (3/5)

Young Men in Love edited by Joe Glass and Matt Miner - This is such a cute collection of queer romance comics made by queer creators for a queer audience. It focuses on male/masc couples through a variety of genres, ranging from more domestic stories to those featuring demon hunters, pirates, ghosts, and so much more. While not every story was a hit, it's rare for an anthology to be completely perfect, there is such an honesty to each one of them that you can't help but give them all a slight bit of admiration. Some standout stories include "Second Star to the Right," "Another Name," "Act of Grace," "The Way Home," and "Love Yourself." (4/5)

The Long Way to a Small, Angry Planet by Becky Chambers - (Review) (4/5)

The Thief Lord by Cornelia Funke - Though I've been a Cornelia Funke fan since I was in middle school, this was one of her books I didn't grow up reading, which may have lessened the impact of it somewhat. The fantastical elements are pushed more to the background compared to her other books, and the magic comes more from the transportive descriptions of Venice. There was an interview in the back of my copy with Funke where she said that she wanted to create a book where children could actually go see the setting for themselves, which is a great way to introduce them to the wonders of their own world. And yet, somehow it felt like it overshadowed the characters a bit, who didn't really grab my attention.

Ultimately, the story didn't do much for me and I had the thought that I had read better versions of these themes in other books, most notably Something Wicked this Way Comes. Personally, I just think I started this book a tad too late. Though points to Funke for giving it a sort of odd, unconventional ending. (3/5)

DNFs:

The Rosie Project by Graeme Simsion - This book was given to me by a friend about 10 years ago and I only got around to reading it since I wanted to declutter my shelves a bit. I'm not real big on stories where romance is the main element, but I wanted to give it a fair shot.

Ultimately, I decided to put it down because I'm a little tired of the straight white male with thinly veiled misogyny representation of autism, especially when the understanding and conversation around neurodivergence has changed so much since this was written. Autism is a very wide spectrum, but apparently media is focused on only showcasing this particular manifestation, coming from writers that are not autistic, nor do they cite any research done in the autistic community to make their characters more authentic. And, judging from reviews I've seen of later installments of this series, it only gets worse.

Also, very much not interested in male writers that cannot write women to save their life. Got no time for that.

And the Ocean Was Our Sky by Patrick Ness - Beautiful illustrations aside, there's not much that interested me in this book which I could have finished if I gave it another half hour, but didn't really see the point. I haven't read Moby Dick, nor do I think I ever will, so the appeal of seeing that story from the whale's perspective wasn't an incentive. That and there are so many confusing elements that make the story too absurd to take seriously: why do the whales swim upside down, how do they have harpoons tied to their bodies when they're incapable of tying them themselves, how do these whales even know how to speak to humans? I think it's a story where you're not meant to think too hard about the logistics, but I couldn't help questioning it on nearly every page.

Average Rating: (3.5/5)

#robin's book log #reading wrap up #book wrap up #silver in the wood #a conspiracy of truths #cry wolf #young men in love #the long way to a small angry planet #the thief lord #the rosie project #and the ocean was our sky

4 notes · View notes

monkeyd-lily · 2 years

Text

Fairy Tail: Neela Dragneel

Fire Dragons Monkey and Bull Part 1

I own nothing except for my characters. Everything else belongs to Hiro Mashima.

Neela's pov

I was taking a nap on Natsu's back just cause I didn't feel like walking and I used my secret weapon that gets me almost anything I want, AKA my puppy dog face🐶. When I looked up to see where we were I saw that we were in front of the guild.

"Finally!" I shouted.

"Whaddya mean finally? You talk as if you've been traveling. Did you forget that I've been carrying you on my back practically the entire time!?!".

"I-I'm sorry, please don't yell at me onii-chan". I said back using my best fake tears when in my head I was kinda laughing at how frustrated he looked before looking so guilty while practically squeezing the life out if me with apologies. He's just lucky I'm used to being almost squeezed to death by hugs from Elfman. Elfman is one of the guild members, he's really strong hence the almost being crushed to death by his hugs.

We walked into the guild with our newest member Blondie. Yes I forgot her name, but what do you expect from me? I just met her. So it's totally not my fault. Natsu kicked the door open and we both shouted "WE MADE IT BACK ALIVE!!!"

"We're home!" said Happy.

I looked around to see everyone having a good time when suddenly my eyes landed on him. That buck-toothed little liar he's gonna pay for this!

"Hey Natsu, Neela, I heard you two went all out in Hargeon, you guys just had to go startin troub-"

"HIYAA!!" Rabbit face didn't even get to finish his sentence before we karate kicked him into next week.

"You lied about that Salamander we're gonna kick your butt!"

"Nah, you have fun bro, I'm too tired from lack of food and milk."

"Ok, that's fine." I walked to the bar ignoring everything else because I was too focused on meat and milk. But before I could make it there I was pulled into something and was slowly being crushed to death. This could only be 1 of 2 things. 1) Someone is literally trying to crush me to death or 2) Elfman is giving me another hug.

"Oh Neela I'm so glad you're ok I thought you would never come back! But then I remembered how much of a man you really are!". Guess it's 2.

"Elfman how many times do we have to go over this? I am clearly a woman and your hugs keep trying to kill me!"

"Oh, sorry bout that, guess I keep forgetting." He replied while giving an innocent smile and rubbing the back of his neck. He put me down and let me sit at the bar.

"Hello Neela welcome back".

"Thanks Mira it's good to finally be back, I'm so tired😞".

"Let me guess meat with a glass of milk?". Instantly my tail started wagging.

"You know me so well, I love you so much you're the bestest!". Yes I made up a word get over it.

"Aw why thank you Neela.".

Mira is Elfman's big sister, but she looks like she should be younger. She's one of the most beautiful wizards in the world, she's always featured in Sorcerer Weekly. Oh, and both her and Elfman use takeover magic. To explain it, Elfman can change his arms into stuff like a monster arm or a stone arm, and Mira can change into things like people and animals. Their last names are Strauss.

I could hear in the background Natsu had started a fight in which everyone started joining. Awwww, I wanna play so bad but I'm so hungry, I know, I'll eat really fast and then go join duh. Neela you're such a genius sometimes you know that? Yea I know me, I really am. As I was waiting for my food I heard someone my name I turned around to see my best friend Gray. I was so happy my tail started wagging again. I leapt into his arms, hugging him.

"Graaaaayyyyyyy!!!!!!!! I missed you".

"Haha, hey there mutt, I missed you too".

"I bought you a present from a gift shop in Hargeon that I wanna give you later, since you obviously are gonna join in on the fun."

"Aww, you did? That's so sweet, why aren't you joining? I thought fighting is one of your favorite things to do."

"It is but I'm so hungryyyyyy."

"Haha, when are you not? Anyways show me my present later when everything's calmed down ok?"

"Kay!"

"Alright, good girl" he said petting my head with one hand while the other held me to his chest. He put me down then kissed me on the forehead before stomping away to join the fight.

Gray Fullbuster is an Ice Mage, so technically we shouldn't really get along being that I'm Fire. But he's one of my closest friends, kinda like another big brother. I turned back around to tell him something that he seems to never notice.

"Gray, your clothes!". He has a bad habit of stripping.

"I don't have time for that!".

Haha, of course, off to fight Natsu as always. They're always fighting the most out of everyone here. I don't know if it's because they are Fire & Ice or what, but it's always entertaining. They don't really hate each other, but they don't really like each other either. It's sort of like a brotherly rivalry they have.

I was sitting next to Cana when Mira finally arrived with my food. Cana Alberona is a magic card Mage person thingy, or something like that. She is Fairy Tails heaviest drinker. She drinks A LOT, and by a lot I mean she drinks a barrel like it's only a cup or a mug of alcohol. I practically inhaled my meat while chugging my glass of milk. I can't really talk though, I mean I eat meat like she drinks booze. When I finally finished swallowing everything I was about to join the fight when someone else called my name.

"What you're gonna say hi to Gray and hug him but not little old me? Damn Neela that hurts😿".

"Lokkkkiiiii, I'm sorry I missed you too. But for future reference, your puppy dog eyes will never work on the master of that technique." I said while pushing his whores out of his lap so I could give him a hug. I'm not really sure what kind of magic he has exactly, or what his last name is. I stood up and ruffled his hair before going to finally join the fight.

"What no kiss for me?"

"Only if you what Natsu to kill you."

"Just being able to look at you is worth dying a thousand times."

I rolled my eyes at his flirting since I'm used to it before saying a quick "see ya".

I jumped on Gray's back since I always take Natsu's side, and started bonking him on the head while he yanked on my tail knowing it was one of the most sensitive parts of my body. This caused me to instantly let go and roll around clutching at it while silently mumbling,

"Dont worry taily, everything will be a-ok, that shameless stripping pervert didn't mean it😖".

"WHO THE HELL ARE YOU CALLING A PERVERT!?! And of course I didn't mean it. I'm sorry just don't start crying with those puppy dog eyes of yours alright!" I started to evilly laugh on the inside. Hehe, baka. Does he really think that his weak ass yanking actually hurts? Hehe of course not! This was all just a plot to get Natsu super angry at him for "hurting" me, after this he won't live to see tomorrow mwahhahahahaha😈!

I got up and stood next to Blondie to see my evil plan unfold. Mira had gotten knocked out from Elfman landing on her.

"HEY! HOW DARE YOU HURT MY LITTLE SISTER!?!" Natsu yelled ripping Gray's boxers off and kicking him which made him fly towards me.......butt-naked😐.

"Hahaha that's what you get when you mess with her". While I'm flattered that Natsu would try and get revenge for me I'm shocked at the way he did it, its kind of funny though.

"GIVE ME BACK MY UNDERWEAR JERK!!". He turned around when he heard me giggle.

"Excuse me Neela I'm sorry for hurting your tail earlier but may I please borrow your underwear?" IS HE INSANE!?!

"OF COURSE NOT IDIOT!!!" I yelled punching him in the face sending him flying backwards (while blushing a little). Dumbass, did he seriously think I would let him borrow my underwear? God he has issues.

#fairy tail #laxusxoc #laxus dreyar #natsuxoc #natsu dragneel

0 notes

girlsships · 2 years

Text

Alright friends I'm home sick and I feel gross. Covid negative so far thank goodness but who knows I gotta take the next test tomorrow. I also just finished watching Utena and I HAVE to talk about it. I'm pretty sure I am forever altered. So under the cut are my thoughts. I have read very little other analysis, this is just my initial interpretation and I do NOT know what I'm talking about so y'all have been warned. I only have knowledge of the 1997 tv series and the movie. I don't know what the director said, I don't know what the manga said, I'm just going off of what's in the show and how I feel about it.

So the thing that is most striking to me is the way that Utena pulls the sword directly from Anthy's body. At the beginning it was frankly disturbing, and kind of felt like a reason to get a boob close up. But I think it is a perfect lens through which to watch the show. Anthy is a being with thousands of swords in her body. And Utena is literally pulling them out one by one, which is painful and difficult but ultimately must be done for Anthy to heal.

I was initially very turned off by the show it was strange and incomprehensible. And the most incomprehensible thing about it was Himemiya who was literally a nothing character. It was Utena who made me persist in watching the show and Utena that I could fall in love with as easily as all the characters in the show do. I'm nothing if not a sucker for a good leading lady. And I think if I had been less open to the lessons the show was trying to teach, I would have struggled to enjoy it, because my initial dismissal of Himemiya was wrong. She is every bit the compelling protagonist that Utena is and learning that was so worth it.

Because this is Himemiya's world. It's almost like one of those movies where you find out at the end that the main character has been a patient in a psych ward the whole time. Ohtori is Himemiya's world that she has constructed for herself to avoid the trauma of her life. Except that in this world the trauma she currently experiences has to be normalized. Her horrible partners become princes ranging from abusive and deranged to passive and ineffective. She is the prize everyone wants to win, and what they win is the pleasure of personal power all abusers win. Himemiya has to frame her trauma this way in order to live with it, she has to become passive in her own life. It is only when Utena refuses to let her slip away into the background that she is able to leave this schema she has built for herself and find a way out.

My thoughts on this are so nebulous. I'm thinking about the time my therapist told me that I'm showing up, that I'm doing the work. And the years that showing up would be unthinkable. We--and when I say we I mean those of us who have experienced trauma--build castles for ourselves out of the tools society gives to us. A lot of what I've seen talks about how this show plays with gender, and it does but also that's so not the point. Himemiya uses gender to keep herself trapped. She is both the bird and the cage, and Utena's unrelenting compassion and love is the only thing that can free her. This isn't the story of how Himemiya gets over all her trauma, this is the story of how she learns to show up, of how the castle crumbles and a part of her dies. The prince that saves her revolutionizes the world, but it's not the whole world it's Himemiya's world. A world in which she is not trapped by trauma and the blame for what happens to her is not put on her.

Part of the compelling nature of the show is this world. I've been saying the world is Himemiya's but the people in it are very much real people and not figments of her imagination--at least I don't think we're supposed to read them that way. Rather the "game" for Himemiya is created by her, or I think we should see it as a reflection of how she views people. Each of the Duelists is a potential prince. The prince is the person that will save Himemiya from Akio. When you're suffering in an abusive relationship there are many people that you secretly hope will save you even if you can't bring yourself to tell them what's going on. As viewers, we focus on their motivations for why they want the power of the rose bride because Utena questions those things. But I think if you look at it from Himemiya's perspective the Duelists are people that could save her from Akio. Saiyonji is abusive and obsessive and shows how many victims of abuse will fall into the same patterns with other people. It makes sense that he's the first "prince." He's the obviously bad dude that most people are easily able to spot, the wife beater, the guy who hits women, and in that way he is the easiest to beat. I've seen people question how he got Himemiya in the first place, but I think if you suspend your disbelief you can see how his place in the story fits. It's about abuse, and his is the most obvious and stereotypical form of it.

It's interesting that Himemiya never really cuts ties with Saionji, continuing to reply to his exchange diary. She is almost placating him, and basically says to Utena that she can't see a reason to stop contacting him unless it bothers Utena. With everything that Akio has already done, Saionji doesn't even register as abusive to Himemiya. In fact, with him it's very easy to be passive, he doesn't really seem smart enough to ask much of her other than subservience.

Juri struck me as interesting from the beginning as the only original female Duelist. But looking at it through the point of view that these are all people who might eventually see what's going on and save Himemiya it makes more sense. Juri is that cool upperclassmen, maybe even a teacher, who you hope is going to help you out. And Miki is a friend who genuinely cares about Himemiya who she hopes will also see her and rescue her. In the end both of them are so wrapped up in their own lives that they don't really see what's going on with Himemiya. They're not evil, it's just not their job to save her. And in Miki's case. Touga is probably the most likely savior, the classic savior. He's the honorable guy she's supposed to fall in love with. And in both the movie and the show he's clearly got some trauma that he could relate with. But he is also looking for a prince. He is also looking to be saved and that's why he falls for Utena instead.

And Akio is not a duelist, he is the current prince. Why does Himemiya have to make him a prince? He is clearly the center of her torment, why put him on such a pedestal? Because facing what he is means taking responsibility for your own lack of control. I think anyone who's been abused knows this. If it's your fault, at least you can do something about it. If he's hitting you because you fucked up you can just not fuck up next time. If something bad is happening it's better that it's your fault, because then you can avoid it next time. And sometimes it works to think that way. Because abusers do have catalysts that cause them to commit the abuse, and there are some ways to diffuse a situation, and sometimes knowing that well enough is what you need to survive. It's a cycle and it keeps you going in a horrible relationship.

Himemiya's relationship to Akio is one of complete compliance, she does what he wants even when it means defying her engaged duelist. Because even though she can acknowledge that something is wrong by looking for a new prince, she can't accept that leaving the current prince and defying him is the solution.

Until Utena.

Seeing things from Utena's perspective is so important. Because you are supposed to be disoriented. You are supposed to be confused about why Himemiya is the way she is. Because that's what it's like to be on the outside. It's not like Utena doesn't have problems, it's not like she doesn't have trauma. She's like all the duelists, but the one difference is that she DOES see Anthy. Everyone in the series is like "she's happy like this, she likes this, she chose this, she wants this" and only Utena questions it. Of course, she doesn't want this! No girl could be happy like this! Utena alone dives deeper and questions the situation.

I think it's notable that the conversation around consent in Japan in 1997 was different from the conversation around consent that I'm experiencing in America in 2022. I don't know what they were talking about in Japan at that time, but I think this show brings up a new level to it. There are some things you just can't consent to, you just can't consent to abuse. Some things are always going to be wrong even if you say you want them. And what Akio does to Anthy is one of those things. Abuse and manipulation can make you say yes to everyone even if your heart says no. And the other Duelists, the people in Himemiya's world cannot see that, they cannot see Anthy only the Rose Bride, because they don't question when she says yes.

But this is why it is so vital that Utena does not save Anthy. Utena cannot "save" Anthy, cannot become a prince, because the only person who can save her is herself. I think the entire Mikage arc is a perfect reinforcement of the cyclic way that this happens. The characters go to counselling and face the realities of their issues, their darkest selves, they fight Utena who more than anything represents truth, they are demolished by her, and all of them choose to forget the lessons of this. It isn't until all the original duelists face Utena for the second time that they are able to face what they've been struggling with. None more obviously than Juri who gives up on her own and learns to let go of the broken heart she had for Shiori (not her feelings for Shiori, but the resentment she has towards her).

Like all magical girls, Utena represents truth, innocence, justice, and love. She sees the truth of what Anthy is suffering and chooses to love her through it. And yet Utena is not perfect, like all heroes she must go through trials and make mistakes. And those trials come, I think Anthy is portrayed a little vindictively in the way that she reveals her relationship to Akio. But I don't think that's how we're supposed to read it. When she sets up first Nanami and then Utena to know the truth, I think she does it in an act of desperation. With Nanami she is doing it as a warning, Nanami is also manipulated and ill-used by her brother, and I feel like Anthy gives her a dose of reality to save her from this. Nanami pretty much exits the series shortly after.

She reveals the truth to Utena because she is finally asking for help. That's also why she tries to jump off the tower. She reveals the truth of her pain, the truth self that she is so afraid to tell anyone. Another time in Therapy I told my therapist that it's like I'm filled with spikes, and I'm so afraid that if I show someone they'll be hurt by them. Anthy can't ask for help in plain terms. She can only cause pain, and she knows it. She can only show Utena how broken and damaged she is. And Utena chooses to respond with love and compassion after witnessing the truth.

And when that finally leads us to the end, the truth is all revealed. And in the last moments, the moments of confrontation, Himemiya can't do it. After all this time Utena has been pulling sword after sword out of Anthy so she can start to heal, but Akio just keeps making more. And in a moment of weakness, Himemiya chooses her castle and her world over choosing truth. She does what she was afraid of doing this whole time and truly injures Utena. She goes back to Akio, unable to face the reality of leaving the world she has built.

If this show was at all nihilistic it would have ended there. But the whole point is that Utena doesn't give up. The reason she was impossible to truly defeat is that she has the nobility. The truth is still there, the love is still there, and she knows that regardless of how she was hurt by Himemiya she still deserves to be saved from Akio. And she is able to open the coffin--but notably not pull her out. That iconic moment where their hands reach for each other and Anthy chooses Utena is just the beginning. It's the most important step because no one can save her, but it was the love and kindness of Utena that helped Himemiya to save herself.

Maybe Utena felt defeated, maybe she really did die at the end, but it was because of that confrontation that Anthy was able to leave her brother. And while the movie was a little more satisfying, knowing the two were going to face the world together, I think the series is a little more realistic. Because you don't know that she'll be okay, she wasn't rescued, but she is facing the truth. She is choosing change, and reality, over the constructed fairytale laid out for her. It's not easy, and Anthy Himemiya is not the victim we want her to be. She's messy, weak, and at times cruel. And from the outside, maybe she could have just walked away and saved everyone the trouble. Maybe if she'd been like Utena she could have had her freedom earlier. But that's not what it's like. Trust me.

And what was the power that everyone wanted? What did she have that was so special? It was her. It was the ego boost her abusers got from controlling her. How many times did the series say that every woman is a rose bride in some way? What is Akio's motivation to treat someone so cruelly? Why does he have to manipulate everyone? For the pleasure of doing it. That's why what Utena rejects is not femininity--in fact in many ways she embraces the aesthetic of femininity (ruffles, her long hair, her ring, even though her outfit is a boy's uniform the shorts are distinctly feminine). What Utena rejects is the notion of inherent weakness and frailty associated with womanhood. The times she is said to look "like a girl" is when she looks weakened, pliable, and that's why it's not exactly a plus. That's also why when Anthy stabs her in the back, it's because this idea of womanhood and weakness being tied up is essential to her schema. If Utena can be a prince and a woman, then she can be her own prince. The world and the men in it seek to make Utena a princess because they seek to weaken her.

The power to change things, power in general, comes from the subservience of women. That has been true in most cultures for most of history. I think it's important that the series revolves around this nebulous idea of power because I think the "power" is just the power of abuse. It's very tied up in gender, but I think you can even take a step back from that and think of it as the power to manipulate and control other people, the power to take someone's choice from them. And in Himemiya's world, that's the power that everyone wants, it's the enticement to save her. She'll give you absolute control over her life, if only you'll save her from her fate. And the only thing Utena wants with that power is to free her.

#revolutionary girl utena #utena analysis #rgu meta

32 notes · View notes

karaboutmyart · 2 years

Text

hi! day 2 back from my tumblr dot com hiatus and I watched ice age for the first time in ten years.

if you don't know what ice age is, it is about a mammoth, a sloth, and a saber tooth tiger going the opposite direction of migration (so like north, where it is cold and ice) to return their beloved baby to his "herd" (his tribe). obviously all taking place during the ice age.

overall, the movie was... ok, I guess. the animation? absolutely horrendous. but pretty ahead of it's time. the story? WHY DO I LIKE IT THIS MUCH.

(the jokes were RLLY cheesy tho)

ok onto the post. I am not sorry

here is all of the homoromantic undertones that I gathered in the 2002 animated movie 'ice age'

• ok, so in the beginning there is literally 2 male rhinos who share a salad together and one saves the dandelion for the other. they r practically background characters but CLEARLY husbands

• sid: "you have beautiful eyes :)"

manfred: "get off of me >:("

• sid calling manfred 'manny' affectionately

• they find the baby and immediately have this sort of. yknow. married couple energy

• diego makes this known by saying, and I LITERALLY quote, "'Us'? You two are a bit of an odd couple." and then when manfred says that 'there is no us' he says, "I see. can't have one of your own, so you want to adopt." (diego says gay rights)

• (immediately after diego says this, manfred and sid go on to argue like a married couple.)

• now they r all together!! baby starts crying. sid has to be responsible to shut it up like the male-wife he is.

• they ALL take turns trying to cheer the baby up

• (LITERALLY ACTING LIKE NEWLY WEDS WITH A NEWBORN, I KID YOU NOT)

• "his nose is dry, that means something's wrong." "he's wearing one of those baby thingjes" "so?" "if he poops, where does it go?" ".......humans are disgusting." "I bet he's hungry. how about some milk?" "I'd love some" "NOT YOU. the baby."

• they all, as a team, fight a whole troop of dodos to get food for their baby

• sid: "how about a good-night kiss, for your big buddy sid?"

manfred: "he (the baby)'s asleep."

sid: "I was talking to you."

manfred:

• sid shows off their beloved baby to some lady sloths

• manfred does not like this.

• diego practically saves sid's life by pretending that he killed him (and has this look of nervousness/concern when it almost doesn't work)

• CUE THE ENTIRE MONTAGE OF THE FAMILY TRAVELLING

• yknow that thing in movies where the wife is like "we're lost ask the guy for directions" and the husband denies it? this literally happens between manfred and sid.

• they play charades with a squirrel. diego flicks him into the sun to Burn.

• cue the iconic slide scene that lasts for like idk two or three minutes straight. diego breaks character and gets pumped up. manfred and sid stare at him like "dude we almost lost our kid r u nuts"

• manfred has this. revelation after realizing that he has been missing a family in his life and comes to terms with the fact that, oh my god, I need to get this baby back home.

• he immediately becomes SUCH a dad after that

• Manfred saves Diego's life and diego is like. oh my god. I love these guys. and this whole time he has been leading them into a trap to kill them

• manfred almost dies. diego RLLY feels shitty after that

• sid creates fire. "from now on, you can refer to me as Sid, Lord of the Flame. from now on I will call you Diego,"

diego: "lord of touch me and you're dead."

diego: ".....NAH I'm just kidding you little knucklehead <3"

• manfred calls diego and sid lovebirds.

• baby takes his first steps, and they all share this tender, loving look between one another :))

• "look at that, our little guy is growing up."

• once manfred goes to sleep, sid and diego gush over him. "I've never had a friend who would risk his life for me." "yeah, manny's a good guy :)"

• then comes the part where diego leads them into the trap and he feels awful and nervous about it.

• manfred gets angry. >:(( but diego feels rlly bad and wants to save them :((

• the other saber tooths come. sid tricks them into thinking he is holding the baby. and when they find out he isn't, he runs away.

• he goes to where the baby actually is. gentle little sid moment..

• manfred gets cornered by diego and the leader of the tigers. diego turns on his leader to save his husband.

• diego risks his life like how manfred risked his. almost dies. he tells sid and manfred to leave him and get the baby to his family :((

• "we were some team, huh?"

• diego to the baby: "you gotta be strong. you have to take care of manfred and sid. especially sid."

• manfred and sid take the baby home. tender moment. sid and manfred are both sad to see him go :((

• "don't forget about us, ok? we won't forget about you."

• SURPRISE diego ends up living!! sid runs to him, relieved.

• "you're ok!"

"nine lives, baby"

"you're ok. I could kiss ya!"

• (if I remember correctly, sid does kiss diego's head multiple times)

• manfred asks diego if he needs to hitch a ride. ends up giving sid a ride instead.

• ends the movie with something about sid saying that it will be the best migration ever and then something about global warming idk!

#ok ive had dreams about this movie for almost a week straight #so i gave in and watched it so my brain would stop.#it is just as i remembered it. gay and cheesy and sometimes stupid. but omg #damn i could write an essay on the character development in this movie tbh LMAOWBWHD #hope u enjoy my post 2day i am horribly sorry it had to be this #the first ice age movie is the only movie #rambling #idk if i will tag this anything i am just putting my thoughts here ok LOL

26 notes · View notes

mxtcha-tea · 3 years

Text

and that's how i met you mother

✎desc; love at first sight with shiratorizawa (honestly, not all of them are love at first sight but ignore that)

✎pairing[s]; shiratorizawa 3rd years x f!reader (separate)

✎genre; fluff, crack

✎language[s]; english

✎chef note; just an excuse for me to write lovesick boys💗 (I can’t do Shirabu, Kawanishi and Goshiki’s part cause I ran out of ideas🤸‍♀️🚆)

Ushijima

It would just be a normal day in his class, learning and stuff like usual

Then after the teacher finished explaining and hand out the tasks, he'll went through his pencil case and couldn't seem to find any pen

Ushijima frowned at that and looked throughly in his pencil case but with no luck, there's none

He swore that he had put some inside, maybe his mind slipped a little?

A tap on his shoulder caught his attention as he turned his head around to make eye contact with you

You're holding out one of your pen to him with a neutral look,

"You can have it," Ushijima look at you surprised, does that mean he can just take it from you? That's a little absurd

But he didn't question it and nodded, slowly taking the pen from your hand and continue studying

The pen doesn't really sit right in his hand, it's not being his and literally someone else that he doesn't have the chance to talk to

He'll spare a glance at you every minute (ngl, he's complimenting your side view internally)

And when you caught him looking at him, he'll just blink and slowly look back at his work with a light blush on his cheeks

(Istg it's so cute)

After the class ends and before you can leave for lunch, Ushijima caught your attention first,

"Here, thank you for lending me this. And unfortunately, i can't take it from you"

You're just looking at him with a dumbfounded look before taking the pen from him,

"Ah, no problem, um..." "Ushijima Wakatoshi"

You nodded at that, scratching the back of your head "...Ushijima. And it's [y/n]"

Both of you are just standing there in front of each other but it's not awkward, surprisingly

It's as if you two are waiting for one of you to speak and end the convo

(Spoiler alert; none of you wanted to end the convo since both of you find each other interesting)

You cleared your throat, fiddling with your pen a little, "Okay, see you after this, Ushijima"

He nodded at that and with that, both of you went to your separate ways

'[Y/N], YOU AWKWARD BASTARD! THAT WAS SO EMBARRASSING, I BET HE THOUGHT THAT YOU'RE WEIRD NOW!'

Ushijima's just walking towards the gym with a fairly visible blush across his cheeks as he look down

"Ushijima..."

"[y/n]..."

"I guess he's fine..."

"I guess she's fine..."

Ushijima Current Mission!

Trying to figure what other scenarios he can drag you in to have a convo with you again

Good luck Wakatoshi~!

Tendou

You and Tendou have talked with eachother a couple of times but it's nothing more than that

And Tendou actually want to talk more with you (at first for friendship points but y'know...)

Today, you look more beautiful than ever to him today

It's not like you're not beautiful every other day (he thinks you're pretty so that's why he kept on having a convo with you)

And he caught into that

Somehow, he can't help bet stare at you in a distance and he tried his best to avoid getting caught

(Tendou's scared that you find him creepy for looking at you all the time and he don't want that thought to flood you mind)

Then, you came to him to explain about the work your science teacher gave since she's absent for the time being

And you can bet that he doesn't hear a single thing you said because he's too focused on yourself

It's kinda like in those scenes in manga where the main character stare into the main interest

The main interest looking as beautiful as ever with flowers around them

Pretty eyes, angelic face, kissable lips

For him, you're perfect and he even thought that you might be an angel in disguise

No matter how you even see yourself, he would always think that you're fascinating, adorable, enticing—

"Tendou, are you okay?"

The redhead snapped out from his thought and got caught by you

By now, his face is literally mocking his hair color as he chuckled nervously,

"Ah, I'm fine! It's just that..."

He was about to stop mid sentences but thankfully he still got that crumbs of courage and just goes with it,

"...you look pretty today,"

Tendou said with a closed eyes smile, peeking an eye open and trying to see your reaction (ngl he's nervous)

You blinked

Before you literally exploded at that which is what make him surprised in his seat

You fake coughed, looking away and avoiding eye contact,

"Thanks...."

[love meter +10!]

If this is an actual manga or anime, there could've been hearts dancing around him

Timeskip to Tendou at his home and squealing quietly to himself (he can't let his family hear him fanboying for someone in his school lmao)

"We're totally going to marry 3 years from now on~" he says to himself in the mirror with so many confidence

(I just love it when Tendou act like that, let him have his moment)

"Haha, thank you gods for creating me and [y/n] in the same world,"

Tendou's Current Mission!

Getting to know you better and give tons and tons of compliments, just like in the simulations! Specifically otomes and dating games

Try your best Satori~!

Semi

It was another day, another practice session

Except that it went longer than Semi expected, he managed to run from the gym to the main entrance

But before he can even put on his shoes, heavy rain started pouring down

He look at the dark grey sky, resting his forehead onto the shoe locker with one shoe already in his foot while the other in his hand

Sighing, Semi thought about asking to come with Tendou and Yamagata since he didn't bring his umbrella

But on second thought, he realized that they prolly forgot theirs too

And all 3 of them have to run under the rain again like last time

Yamagata and Tendou: "We can avoid the rain if we're fast enough!"

He shivered at that their words and the thought of getting terribly sick again

And before Semi's brain can process a strategy for himself, he was caught off guard when an umbrella was opened next to him,

"Ah sorry,"

In those few seconds, everything went slow motion when your eyes catches his

(He swore it felt like in the anime)

He can feel his cheeks flushing a little but thanks to the wheater, it's not obvious

"Hello?" Semi snapped from his thoughts, shaking his head before focusing on you again,

"Sorry, sorry, um—" "You don't have an umbrella?"

He blinked, shaking his head slightly

It's a pretty peaceful staring between you two with the rain hitting the ground as background sounds

Until you lift your umbrella up, and pointed at the small spot next to you with your thumb,

"Here, I'll help you,"

"Eh?"

Semi was flabbergasted a little at your statement but would he decline it?

Of course not,

"Just tell me where your house is then I help you go there,"

And that's how he find himself back at his house's entrance with you in front of him,

"And that's why I just let you walk with me for the afternoon,"

"Is that so, oh wait! I haven't known your name, and you prolly haven't known my name either..."

He scratched the back of his neck before looking at you with a smile,

"The name's Semi Eita, thanks for the walk back home,"

Your lips parted a little before in turns into a tooth rotting smile,

"[y/n], no problem and thanks for the company, Eita,"

An arrow pierced through his heart as his face is literally the color of Tendou's hair

And just like that, you left him on the entrance with a funny expression upon his face

Cutting the scene to Semi punching his pillow (rip pillow)

"You already caught me off guard already but you really had to look at me like that...."

Semi's Current Mission!

Try to find you the next day after first period and try not to be awkward with you and his convo after the eventful day

You can do it Eita~!

Yamagata

Let's just say that,

Yamagata went through the late anime girl scenario

But with his toast falling down from his mouth while running towards his school

And his stamina almost running low despite being a volleyball player and a libero

(His house's prolly far from his school, cut him some slacks sheesh)

He's pretty much stumbling a lot when he enters the school and speed walking up the stairs

Some of the students look at him weirdly but that doesn't become his main concern because a strict teacher is going first

Yamagata's almost there, almost reaching his classroom's door

But god had other plans and place an invisible rock in front of him

And as you can tell, he slipped on it and now facepalming the floor

(The sound is so loud my lord)

He groaned, shaking a little while trying to sit up from his position

The male look up and is now face to face with you, who's looking down at him

Okay he might be delusional from the impact but is he actually looking at an angel right now?

"Dude, you okay? That's gotta hurt from the sound that it made—"

Your words drowned inside his mind as he widened his eyes with pink tints decorating his cheeks

'This...THIS IS IT!'

"—also I think your nose is bleed—"

"PLEASE MARRY ME!!"

You flinched at that but keep a calm face, a little bit concerned that he may hit his head too hard

While Yamagata is just having heart eyes for you, sparkles around him after saying those words almost too confidently

He doesn't know what's in him that make him think that you're the one,

But he definitely can feel it

You sighed, crouching down while searching through your pocket and pulling out a small pack of tissues,

"I think we're going so fast right now but no, maybe 5 years later or never,"

"Does that mean you agree??"

"I don't know, you're handsome but also stupid, a himbo I think,"

You wipe away the blood dripping down his nose, taking his arm, opening it and put the bloodied tissue on it before closing it, giving a light tap,

"Now go to the nurse office,"

"Will you be there for me?"

"No,"

You help him stand up, dusting his shoulder and walk away as if nothing happened

Yamagata watches you from the distance with a lovesick smile

Tendou laughed behind him with Ushijima and Reon next to him and Semi looking at Yamagata, confused,

"Hayato, I have no idea if you had your alarm on but you just came to school during recess,"

"She's perfect...also, I think I need to go to the nurse right now cause my head hurts,"

Yamagata's Current Mission!

Marry [y/n]

Have fun, Hayato~!

Reon

(He will have the best love at first sight cause I say so)

It was the school festival and it's lively in every corner of the school, the outside, inside the classrooms, even the hallways

Reon had just finished his part of his classroom and now can walk around to enjoy the festival

Honestly, it's a pretty normal day to him despite being the school's festival

The students of Shiratorizawa has always been this lively so it's good that they can be keep the atmosphere as how it is like any other days

Since the others are still working on their parts, Reon was all by himself

Sure, the quiet sounds without Tendou, Semi and Yamagata is fine but he prefer it being loud anyway

A short of way to fill in the boring silence

But what's the bad thing to enjoy the peace once in a while?

So he take a small walk outside the Shiratorizawa building

Stalls decorated the outside with students busy serving the customers

He was greeted by some of them as he greeted them back with a warm smile

Hands inside his pocket while looking at the sky every few seconds

Baby blue sky with fluffy white clouds, it is the spring afterall

It was at that moment where he turn his head around and caught your eyes

It was something between those few seconds that a lighting strike between the string connecting you two for a second

Reon knew he did from the moment you two clashed with each other so suddenly

It was...not love at first sight exactly,

But rather, familiarity, like,

'Oh, hello, it's you. It's going to be you,'

The staring prolly lasted more than he expected before you snapped out from your thought, shaking your head,

"Sorry! Didn't mean to..." "But you didn't do anything?" He rose an eyebrow, smiling sheepishly and watch your panic slowly dissolves

"Well, technically yeah but It was bad of me to stare off at you like that,"

He chuckled, your heart clenching at that,

"Don't worry, I think I did it too...maybe both of us did,"

"Ah, yeah! Probably..." you fiddled with your fingers, visibly nervous facing him since he's basically a stranger even tho being in the same school,

"Reon Oohira," "Eh?" You look at him with confusion at first, while he just offers you a smile,

"My name, since we have...how to say it, meet each other? And I don't want to make you uncomfortable after all that so I think it's best if we introduce ourselves,"

Your heart's basically beating out loudly that you'll afraid that he'll hear it

But, that doesn't seem so bad, does it?

You mirrored his smile, this time more confidently than before,

"[y/n] [l/n], nice to meet you Reon!"

"Please,"

Reon put his hand onto your head, "Just call me Hira,"

You fainted

"She's interesting, I love her,"

Reon's Current Mission!

Get to know you better and honestly, there's nothing else to do after that other than asking you out

You'll do great, Oohira~!

#haikyuu #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu crack #shiratorizawa #shiratorizawa x reader #ushijima x reader #ushijima wakatoshi #tendou x reader #tendou satori #semi x reader #semi eita #yamagata x reader #yamagata hayato #reon x reader #reon oohira

294 notes · View notes

lunarflux · 3 years

Text

"baby i drink to forget - not to remember"

hwang hyunjin x reader

genre — fluff!au

drinking!!!

suggested background music: x

What started out as one bottles suddenly turned into ten.

Your group of friends sat in a circle on the floor, passing soju bottles around like greetings at the thought of another long year of friendship that came and went. It was already past midnight, but the crickets were silenced by the boom of spontaneous laughter and conversation.

Hyunjin always sat beside you. You never knew why - in all the years of friendship you had, he always chose the seat next to yours. He'd smile and laugh with you, but he never got any closer than the two inches of the space between seats. It's been years, but you never thought to ask.

Tonight was game night. Felix bought some card game and thought it was a good idea to play this over drinks. You had to admit this was more fun than watching everyone play games or going out to a club.

"It's called We're Not Really Strangers -" Felix opened the box.

You groaned, recognizing the name. "Felix, that's like an emotional game; why'd you pick that?" You hiccupped in between shots.

He shrugged, "I dunno. It seemed like a fun thing to do. I can't remember the last time we had a deep talk other than that one wedding we went to when Changbin started crying into his cake after one too many shots."

Had Changbin not finished a bottle of two by himself, he might have been awake for that jab.

Hyunjin puffed out his cheeks, taking the deck from Felix and shuffling it in between taking another shot. "Five years of friendship, and you still want to know more about us, huh?"

Felix smiled in between exchanging glances with your friend beside him. He'd had a crush on her for ages. A small game like this should've said enough.

In one word, describe how you feel right now.

When was the last time you surprised yourself?

Strangers would describe me as _____. Only I know myself as ______.

The game went on until eventually you and Hyunjin were the only ones awake. Felix left with his crush for a midnight ice cream run. Changbin had to be carried home. It was just the two of you. He pulled the next card.

"Are you missing anyone right now? Do you think they're missing you?" Hyunjin read aloud to you. "Well?"

"Well, what?" You sneered.

"Are you missing anyone?" He smirked.

"No."

"Not even one person?"

"No."

"Why not?"

You shrugged. "Everyone I really like is here in this room. What's to miss?"

Hyunjin almost looked satisfied. Skipping your turn, he picked up another card. "Wild card - make an assumption about me. Says we both have to answer."

You turned to face your friend.

As if he wasn't expecting you to get so close, he nearly leaned away. You could smell the faint scent of alcohol on his lips. Or maybe it was yours? After the last bottle, you couldn't really tell anymore.

Hyunjin was always such a curious character. Back when you were in high school, he was always so sweet. He'd offer to walk with you to school or share his lunch if you tried to diet. You almost swore he liked you at some point, but it just never happened. He stayed a dear friend, one you'd see every month or so for drinks.

When Hyunjin was drunk, he'd lean on you. This was the only time he ever did, and part of you wished he wouldn't drink when you were together because in his drunken splendor, he'd talk - and you never forgot what he'd say.

"Be my girlfriend."

And every time you'd respond -

"Ask me when you're sober."

He never did. He never really really remembered. The next days were always full off groans and complaints of hangovers, yours included. Even though he'd ask you what happened, you knew those were just drunk words. If he didn't remember in the morning, it couldn't have been real.

It would be a complete lie to assume you never developed anything deeper than friendship-like love for Hyunjin. It was hard not to. But every time you tried to get close, it was like he wanted to pull away. After all these years, it didn't make sense anymore.

Drunk words are - after all - drunk.

"You go first." You closed your eyes, finally feeling one or two drops of soju hitting your spine. It had been too long since you drank this much. It was a miracle you weren't passed out like the others.

Hyunjin laughed once then nothing. He just stared, like he was looking for the words.

"I don't know what to say."

"Oh, come on - " You pushed his shoulder, your head rolling forward. "There has to be something you think you know about me. Anything. Something."

You were close to laying back down on the floor when you suddenly felt Hyunjin's hand on your back, keeping you upright.

You grimaced. "This really is the only time, huh."

He looked at you with concern. "I'm sorry?"

You leaned in closer to him, poking his cheek with your finger. "You always hug the guys. You never hug me! You don't lean on me unless you're drunk - you never get close to me." You giggled, turning your five year long question into sarcastic banter. "How come you never want to touch me, huh?"

"It's not like that." He smiled, poking your pouted lip. "Don't look at me like that."

"Like what." You pouted harder. "You never get close to me when you're sober, you never lay a hand on me. You only ask me to be your girlfriend when you're drunk. Why can't you be like that all the time?"

Hyunjin's smile slowly dropped. He looked at you seriously.

"Why, you want to be my girlfriend?"

You stifled a laugh. This was no time to be serious. For once, it looked like you were more drunk than him, and this wasn't the time to get caught up in feelings you always tried to forget. "Shut up. You don't mean it."

"You think I don't want you to my girlfriend?"

You turned your head only for your cheek to meet Hyunin's finger. He kept his finger there, his smile growing again. "You're cute, you know that?"

Pushing his hand away, you released a heavy sigh. "Hwang Hyunjin, I told you before, so I'll say it again. Say these things to me when you're sober. I'm too drunk to deal with you teasing me."

"I'm not drunk." He shrugged. " You guys drank the most, and I have work in the morning. Why would I drink?"

You blinked once. Twice.

"You're being serious. You're not drunk?" Suddenly, you felt very sober.

Hyunjin's smile stretched across his entire face, like he was watching a puppy stumble over its own legs. "I never drink enough to get that drunk. I sober up very quickly - I thought you knew."

"How the hell would I know that?" You sneered. "We always drink together!"

"Yeah, all of us. It's not like you're counting my shots or checking when I stop drinking."

"Then why didn't you ever ask me when you were sober?"

"If you really thought I only wanted you to be my girlfriend because I was drunk, then I thought you really didn't want to." Hyunjin patted your head. "You're always so touchy with the guys. I didn't want to be like everyone else. If you were my girlfriend, I'd get jealous."

"I still can't tell if you're lying - " You poured yourself another shot before lifting the shot glass to your lips, but instead of feeling another stinging kiss of liquid, you just felt the back of Hyunjin's hand, shielding the soju from reaching the edge.

He grabbed the shot and downed it in one easy swig. Placing the glass back down, he sighed. "Fine -"

Hyunjin pulled your face close to his, the taste of soju still glimmering on his lips. A forceful yet deep kiss, he sighed into you before dropping one hand to the back of your neck, the other to your waist. His lips moved slowly but with a hunger. Your head was spinning, but whether it was because of the alcohol or just him you couldn't tell. Squeezing the back of your neck ever so slightly, Hyunjin lowered you down to the floor, suddenly more sober than ever.

He looked at you - but it was like you were looking at him for the first time ever in your life. The apartment suddenly seemed so quiet as his gaze followed your heaving chest, breathless from his kiss.

"Yes, I want you to be my girlfriend." He finally spoke. "But I don't want you to answer until you're sober."

Hyunjin stood up and gathered his things. After what seemed like an hour, you sat up and realized he was gone.

Your head was still spinning - that couldn't have been real.

You hadn't seen Hyunjin in a week.

Not for lack of trying, but whenever you unlocked your phone only to see his name at the top of your notifications, you couldn't help but panic. Yes, you woke up with a hangover the next day, but the memory of that kiss was burned into your brain, and it was the only thing you could think about.

Hyunjin lived at an apartment complex down the street.

You couldn't help but wonder if he'd magically appear in front of you, and then your words would just be caught in your chest.

Look down, look down. Just keep walking.

Ready to enter your apartment, your curiosity peaked. Looking across the way, you spotted him. Standing in front of his apartment.

With a girl?

Blinding fury took over as you made your way over to him. The girl had already walked away, but something in you just said -

"You're such an asshole!" You gave him one hard shove, nearly pushing him over.

Hyunjin laughed once. "Did I miss something?"

"You - and the - she -"

"- is my neighbor. She got my mail by accident." He opened his back to reveal a small package and two envelopes.

You stumbled back, immediately regretting your entire existence.

Hyunjin took two steps toward you as you took two back. "You haven't been answering my texts."

"W-Well, I -" You couldn't find your words let alone remember how to speak. "I just - "

"So are you ready to give me your answer?"

"What answer?"

He leaned in again, cupping your cheek with his hand. Barely grazing your lips with his, Hyunjin teased. You could feel his breath playing over your skin. Gently resting his lips on your forehead, he pulled away with a content grin.

"I won't kiss you again unless it's as your boyfriend."

It took everything in you not to punch him straight in the stomach, so you settled for a hit to the arm. "Why -" and again "- didn't -" and again "- you just -" and once more "- ASK ME."

Hyunjin couldn't hold back in his laughter. "Sue me for getting nervous in front of the girl I like!" He grabbed hold of your hand before lacing his fingers between yours. "Is that a yes?"

"I hate you." You fought back a laugh.

He nodded. Pulling you into his chest, Hyunjin kissed the top of your head.

"I guess that means yes."

155 notes · View notes

kaz11283 · 3 years

Text

Only One God For Me

(Part 2 of Love Never Wins)

SUMMARY: After blowing up at him afyer weeks of hiding out you challenge Loki to hand to hand. Blowing up might have been the best thing, it could help you let off that frustration you had built up.

Characters: Nat, Clint, Thor, Loki, avengers on the side line.

(Loki x you, clint x you, Thor x you, Nat x you)

ANNOUNCEMENT: I didnt know how much part 1 was going to be but I am forever greatful in this amazing community! Thank you guys SO much! Check out my other stuff too if you like this. As always reblog, ask, comment, and like! After I finish up here I'll be back to writing for Fire and Ice. Thank you again so SO much for everything! 💚💚💚

Loki Master List

~~~~

You and Nat were standing at one end of the training area as Loki walked in. You glanced up from Nat wrapping your hands and noticed he was wearing his normal traing gear. Plain leather black pants with a dark green Henley, his hands already wrapped.

"Focus, your getting distracted." She said yanking on one of the straps.

"Ow. I cant help it Nat, we went from cant keep our hands away from each other to literally fist fighting each other. Ya know this is normally frowned upon is normal society." You streched your fingers out and balled them back up streching out the gloves a little.

"Hunny, even in a perfect world were anything but normal. I mean for god sakes your fighting a literal god. You remember what I taught you. Right?" She asked looking almost terrified for me.

"Yes mother, I havent forgotten. This is gonna be a piece of cake." Inside you were freaking out. You normally was in a very high spot with your bow or normally trying to break into the computers. You wasnt normally in hand to hand combat, but you were smarter than to think you would never need it.

You turned shaking you head and putting the mouth piece in your mouth. Hitting you fist together jumping back and forth getting ready. Loki just stood there smirking. You was gonna smack that smirk off his face.

"Hey sis, Im not saying you cant beat him just be careful. He throws a nasty left hook." Clint said munching on some chips."Thanks, Hawk. Mind explaining why the rest of the team is here?" You mumbled around the mouth piece.

"Thor, definitely Thor." He said walking back to the small group that gathered.

"Sweetheart. Are we gonna fight or are you just gonna stand there chit chatting?" He called across the mat.

"I'm coming." You walked across the mat to the center. Someone hit a bell signaling for the fight to start and he jumped toward you. You dodged his first attemped and circled him slowly. You could read his every move, read where he was going next.

You took a defence stance that Nat had taught you from your training before he lunged again. This time you managed to upper cut him in the side knocking some of the wind from him.

"Oh you little minx. I figured I would take it easy on you but we can play your way also." This time he took a step back centering himself. Looking up you noticed he had a dangerous look in his eye.

"I didnt invite you here to take it easy on me, I invited you because you dont take anything serious. Because if someone like me can beat you in hand to hand then anyone can." You stepped closer to him gauging what move you was going to make next.

He dropped down to the mat attempting to sweep your legs out from under you, he missed one but caught the other causing you to fall. He jumped on top of you pinning your hands above your head. "Now this positions brings back memories." He whispered to you causing your face to turn bring red. You brought your leg up able to wrap it around his waist and slammed him back down to the mat gaining some advantage.

"This one also." He smirked. You raised your fist above you aiming for his face. Whem you brought it down he moved his head causing you to miss. It felt like forever that you were both on the mat neither one gaining aginst the other. A busted lip here a bloody nose there. When the bell rang for a break Nat was in your corner with Clint offering you some water and a rag ti wipe the blood off.

"Sis, I'm try in real hard not to grab an arrow and stabe him with it." Clint said from one side. You could see anger in his eyes.

"Hawk, its fine. Given the circumstance its all good. Its just training in a matter of speaking. Anger is mostly wunning but I got this. I was trained by the best. I'm not even tired." You took another drink of water before going back out to the mat.

"This is fun. I have never seen my brother trying harder to win anything in his life." Thor shouted across the room. "Lady y/n is quite good at sparing. We must fight sometime." Thor laughed.

A few more rounds when and you could feel the weight of the afternoon but you wasjt about to simply throw in the towel just yet. You knew you could get the best of him. You had thrown him back on the mat then he took his feet placing them on your chest shoving you off of him. Before you knew it you were surrounded by multipuls of him.

"Loki we agreed no sedair! This is cheating!" You yelled at them.

"God of Mischief and lies sweetheart. Besides we're in weird predicaments all the time. You said so yourself. Tell you what. You find the real me and I'll forfeit." One of the clones said. You stood up in the middle of them all focusing everything you had on concentrating, ignoring Clint yelling in the background and the rest of the group shouting.

You opened your eyes zeroing in on one closest to you and walked up to him.

"Are you sure your right about this decision?" It mocked.

"Yeah. I think I am." You brought the ball of yoyr fist up crashing it into Loki's nose. The rest of the clones disappered as he fell to his knees in front of you. "You are a complete and utter asshole Loki Odinson. I hope that it messes with you for a while that you got beat by a mortal." You started unwrapping your gloves as you walked away.

Over the next few weeks you avoided every living space in the tower that you knew he would be in. It had truly hurt you that he had cheated during the fight. You still couldnt understand how just months before you couldn't keep your hands off of each other now you were both avoiding each other like the plague.

"Miss y/n. Team has a mission. Tony wants everyone in the confrence room dressed and ready in 15 minutes." JARVIS called pausing your movie. With a roll of your eyes you walked to your bedroom to start getting ready. Pulling out your tight skinny jeans a black tank top and your zip up hoodie you French braided your hair and grabbed your bow case before heading down.

The rest of the team was gathered when you walked in and placed your case on the table opening it up to make sure everything was right. Streching out the strings and making sure the sights were spot on aiming them to the other side of the room where Loki stood.

"It would be more effecitve if you had an arrow." Clint whispered next to you.

"Shut up, I'm just making sure everything is right." You put it back down in the case and started going over your arrows.

"You realize we have a place you can put that when your not using it." Tony said walking around you.

"Right up your ass if you suggest that again." You laughed putting everything back up.

"Love the enthusiasm kid." Tony laughed walking to the front of the table.

"Ok Team, going to be a long few days for us. Just got some Intel about a caravan carrying some explosives across the Scandinavian border. Gonna have to divide into teams for this one. Hawk, Nat, Strange, Rodgers, Bruce, and Thor you'll be starting at the meeting point and working your way toward us. The rest is with me." Tony pulled a map up on the big screen showing where you wwre going.

"Oh come on, why cant I be with the A team?" You asked with a groan.

"Sorry kid, gotta divide it up right. One god for each, one Archer. Only fair. And even if you two hate each other you guys work good together." Tony shrugged.

"Yeah sorry kid." Clint laughed.

"Hey I'm a full three minutes older that you. Probably explains why I'm better. Whatever. I'll go pack my stuff." You huffed standing up.

The next two hours seems to drag by, it was freezing here. You was just ready to get this over with so that you could go back home and relax in a nice warm bath, you pulled your jacket tighter aginst you.

"I've told you many times that you should start wearing the uniform that they gave you. You'll freeze to death one day." Loki said taking off his cloak and putting it around your shoulders.

"Thanks, but I'm still pissed at you." You hugged it closer. "I hate the whole uniform thing. To tight to revealing."

Another few minutes pass before Tony gives everyone the heads up that your about to be over the caravan. Figuring you were warm enough you took the cloak off and handed it back to him. "You may still be pissed at me but I do still care very deeply for you y/n. I was an idiot for everything." He took it and wrapped it around his shoulders. When his fingers grazed yours there was a surge that went through you.

"Give me time. You really hurt me, not just by breaking up with me but by lying to me during training. Good luck out there God of Mischief."

"Tony, your gonna have to get lower i cant get a clear shot on the driver!" You yelled over the wind whipping around your face. About that time a diffrent arrow shot through gettkng the driver in the side causing the vehicle to completly stop.

"Gotta be faster than that sis. One for me." Clint laughed over the com.

"You are my least favorite person right now Hawk." You mumbled. Tony brought the Quinn Jet down so your team could spread out.

"That is truly saying something my dear." Lokis smooth voice said in your ear.

"You gave me your cloak to keep me warm. Gave you a fell points." You pulled back again and shot it through the truck behind the first hitting the driver in the head. "Got one, Hawk, your next."

"Can we cut the chatter. Got alot going on in the sky at the moment." Tony said. Youbcould here something firing above you looking up you could see Tony being followed by a jet firing at him. "Need some back up guys. Twins. Anyone."

"Hawk. I need a Boom Boom stick." You met him in the middle of the road.

"I really wish you wouldnt call them that." He said handing you one. You both pulled your bows back and aimed. "Heads or tails?"

"I like the tails." You let go of the sting and watched as the jet exploded.

"I think she can call them whatever she wants as long as she keeps doing a good job keeping bogies off my ass." Tony yelled over the coms.

"I hate this. I cant see shit down here." You yelled over to Clint. "I gotta get higher." You looked around eyeballing the turnes over truck. You threw the bow across your back and started climbing up the truck. Shots rang around you one grazing your side, before it had started it was like it stopped looking behind you you noticed Loki with his daggers in his hands.

"You need to pay more attention y/n." He scolded you.

"Why pay attention when I have someone keeping an eye out for me." You smiled.

"Oh darling Im doing more than just keeping an eye out." After everything that ass had done to you he was flirting FLIRTING with you.

"Y/N! No. More. Gods." Clint yelled. From here you could see everything going on. Nat fighting two men, you took one out easily from your spot. She shot you a thumbs up. Bruce had hulked out throwing things everywhere, multiple times you had to dodge something flying your way. The fight was almost over when you glanced behind you noticing four men backing Loki aginst a turned over car.

His hands were up as if in surrender. "Loki why arent you using your sedair?" You mumbled pulling the bow back.

"Well darling you could say that I am in on of those weird predicaments. I've exahusted alot of my power down here." His back was aginst the truck now.

"Could let him get beat up." Clint pipped in as you shot one of your last arrows though two of the guys standing there. You watched Loki easily take out the other two.

"Told you Hawk, I'm not like that." You smiled walking over to Loki. "Although you could use a little practice in hand to hand, dont you agree?"

"Only if your the one practicing with me he smailed down at you.

"Ugh! Y/n! No mo-" Clint started before you pulled the com from your ear.

"Only one God for me." You leaned up kissing Loki on the cheek.

~~~~

Tag List:

@kgirardin

@sophlubbwriting

@supbeeches

#loki avengers #loki laufeyson #loki odinson #loki #loki and thor #loki daily #loki fanfic #loki fanfiction #loki x reader #loki fluff #loki x y/n #loki x you #lokilaufeyson #loki one shot #mcu loki

74 notes · View notes

boop-le-snoot · 3 years

Text

masterpost ☀️ main masterlist ☀️ taglist

previously on...

Chapter 5. We have stucky, we have stevesambucky friendship, we have a new place to live and strange being a good guy because tony definitely ranted at him. Also, we're beginning the creepy part of the plot. I have decided that sam will be one of the main platonic characters in this story because I love sam.

fun fact: I used to be a creepypasta writer! Going back to my roots here, hehe.

Things had stated changing, for better or worse, much sooner than I had been prepared for - but was anyone, ever, really ready for the next big step? Certainly not me - the view that greeted me after I'd finished my shift at Jeremy's was peculiar and unexpected, so I froze, eyebrows high at the two super-soldiers parked, once again, illegally, right in front of the entrance door.

"Hi, doll," Bucky was reclined against his boyfriend comfortably, his bike standing a pace behind Steve's, who nodded companionably, a sheepish grin on his face.

"G'day," I nodded, eyeing them warily. "I think I know where this is going..."

"No, no, nothing like that," both men frantically waved their hands around, Steve coming up close to approach me slowly. "You're not in trouble. I came out here to say thanks," giving a sappy look to the grouch that was his boyfriend, Steve reached into his pocket and handed me a slip of paper. "Just, uh..."

"Those are our phone numbers. Don't hesitate to give either one of us a call if someone bothers you," Bucky took over the stammering blonde, shaking his head at the soft blush that blossomed on the good captain's face. The brunette wrapped an arm around Steve's shoulders with a shy smile of his own. "Or if you, I don't know, need someone to carry your groceries or something," he snorted. "The punk wouldn't leave it alone until we came out personally to thank you, the sap."

The laughter bubbled up from my chest as I grabbed and pocketed the paper, throughly amused and at the endearing gesture. "Sure, thanks."

"And, uh," Bucky's eyes briefly looked to the side. "We'd appreciate if you keep the status of our relationship to yourself for now. We're not, like, officially out yet."

I froze in place, mouth falling open. Surely they were aware that anybody with a functional pair of eyes could see that they were much more than 'good, lifelong friends'. "No problem, guys. Lemme know if anyone gives you shit about it though, this place," I gestured to the café behind me, "is strictly paparazzi and homophobe-free."

Steve's grin grew even more genuine. "Yeah, we heard all about it from Tony and Stephen. Said 'twas the only place they go these days."

I wasn't aware of that. "It's the paps, isn't it?" I remembered Tony's remarks.

Bucky shook his head, the metals of his prosthetic arm whirring as it recalibrated. "Not only. The public hasn't had the best reaction to a man goin' out with a man," the brunette looked away to the side, where Steve's face had fallen considerably. "And Tony's an eccentric rich man. We're jus' two soldiers. The US Army won't be too happy if we... Came out," both men were crestfallen yet determined.

I had a hunch nothing would be able to separate the two - seeing as not even seventy-odd years and brainwashing and ice couldn't keep the captain and his sarge apart, I doubted that a few government weasels could successfully do the job. Even so, it was unpleasant, to say the least, to see them deny themselves something that technically was perfectly fine in the 21st century.

I chewed on my lip, gathering my wits. "I've clocked out, I can tell you this as a friend- as a person. You don't owe the army jack shit. They do not own you, you are your own person that they experimented their German knockoff steroids on. Respectfully, fuck that shit." I firmly stated my opinion, figuring that there should have been at least someone that told Steve that he is more than his star-spangled uniform and giant metal frisbee.

The blonde scrunched his eyebrows together, fingers gripping onto his belt until the knuckles went white, the hard line of his jaw set firm.

Bucky laugh took me by surprise. "Agreed, doll. I'm too old to be hiding in back alleys and shit," he clapped on his boyfriend's shoulder. "Although I'm happy enough with just not going to prison for bein' in love with this idiot."

"Jerk," Steve's responding pout was downright adorable now that I knew the circumstances surrounding their relationship.

Which wasn't exactly surprising. As a barista, I knew my fair share about my regulars' love lives, their jobs, their kids. The tea was almost always piping hot. "Bye, boys," I smiled at them warmly, throwing a glance at the time, adjusting the strap of my bag for comfort. "Stay outta trouble!"

Steve scrambled for his bike, having noticed my pointed gesture. "Sorry, didn't mean to hold you back. There, I have a spare helmet," he gestured behind him. "I'll give you a ride."

"There's no way in Hell I'm getting on that death trap!" I shouted cheerfully, walking briskly towards my second job, hiding a laugh in the warmth of my scarf as two very offended motorcycle-loving gay fossils sped past me, making truly incredible amounts of noise. Good for them.

Odette was content to let me rummage around the bodega without showing herself more than necessary, taking her appointments and doing- well, witch stuff, I guess, only coming out to poke at the various jars for ingredients.

"Star, I have a proposition for you," right before closing time, Odette's voice filled out the store with its low drawl. "A good friend of mine owns an apartment building, not far from here actually, and one tenant recently moved out. It's a safe space for those who are different," she enunciated the last word, fixing it with a pointed stare. "She's not overly fond of total strangers coming to live there. The rent is reduced and the apartment itself is slightly bigger and more fashionable than yours..."

"Where's the catch?" I found myself interrupting her. I wouldn't lie: the reduced rent and increased size of the apartment did interest me, as well as the probability of a kinder, more involved landlord. My current one was - not the best, but such was life in the NYC.

"There are a few rules to follow, rules that might seem strange at first but they'll make sense in time. And your neighbors might be also a little... Unusual," Odette carefully studied my face for any signs of displeasure.

I sighed.

And then I sighed some more as I was signing my new lease in a few days' time, having spoken with Porter, my new landlord, and his boyfriend who had claws and fangs- after so much time spent around Odette's, I didn't even blink. The couple liked me enough to extend a secure but flexible offer and some furniture to choose from the attic where they kept the spares.

I quite liked the large, vintage couch I placed next to the wide bow windows in the living room. The floors were hardboard and well-kept, the walls a nice, homely shade of green and Porter didn't mind any new holes in them that might arise from hanging up decorations. I scheduled a thrift crawl at the next possible opportunity, happy with the "good employee" bonus Odette had given me after I sealed the deal.

My stuff was boxed up, a sleepless night and a call to a begrudging Jeremy to have a couple of days off to move; I was, thankfully, not late on my schedule and all that I had left was to rent a car to move the boxes of my things and the few pieces of furniture I had decided to keep - my haul in Porter's attic had been incredibly rewarding and my new apartment had all the basics to make it look like a warm, inviting bohemian home in a while.

My phone rang suddenly, startling interruption to the romcom I was watching as I ate my last lunch in my old apartment. "Hello?" I answered the number without looking.

"Hi, doll," Bucky's voice rang out cheerful. "A little witch told me you were moving. I thought you might need a hand?"

I blanked momentarily, the thought of enlisting two very busy super-soldiers to haul ten boxes and two endtables worth of stuff not having crossed my mind at all. "Is this the moment when you stop by my house just to unattach and put your prosthetic arm somewhere and leave?" I asked, hearing distinctive snickering - several more people were with him.

The cheer in his voice blossomed into a full belly laugh. "You're funny," he teased me. "And thanks for the idea. But no, I have a room full of men that have nothing better to do but get on my nerves. Might as well make 'em useful," his accented drawl thickened the more we spoke. Muted cheers rang out in the background.

"Uh, sure," who was I to look a gift horse in the mouth? I rattled off my address and warned them I didn't have a car, after which Bucky assured me it will be taken care of. The last remaining knick-knacks packed away, I went down to take out the trash, and returned to four people standing in front of my apartment building, all except one unrecognisable in their civilian clothes. "Hello," I waved at them, side-eyeing the tallest, grumpiest man of the bunch.

Stephen Strange was there, looking around curiously, hands in the pockets of his plain grey hoodie. I had already forgotten how normal he looked without his robes, and, frankly speaking, I preferred him like that. His title and the attire that came with it were quite intimidating.

"Hey there," a dark-skinned man who I recognised to be the Falcon, raised his hand. I had not met him yet. "I'm Sam, Sam Wilson. You must be the Star we're helping?" His quick once-over and the tilt to his lips; the ease with which he flirted had me brandishing smirks of my own. I led them all upstairs, Stephen's silence being just so loud. Sam, however, had no such reservations. "So, you're a witch, right?" Wow, subtlety was his middle name.

"Yes, I'll show you my broomstick," I deadpanned, wiggling my eyebrows at him with a grim look.

"Woah woah," Sam raised his hands as the three men behind us snickered loudly. "What happened to 'how are you? let's have dinner sometime'?"

I did my best imitation of an evil cackle as I let them through my front door. The four newcomers looked around my nearly empty apartment with muted interest before zeroing in on the pile of things in the corner: a few pieces of furniture and nearly taped boxes. Should be a walk in the park for four men.

A hand on my arm pulled me from the stupor of observing Sam, Bucky and Steve act like a well-oiled trio, bantering and teasing each other as they discussed how to best move the things.

"Look," Stephen Strange had all the appearance of a chastised puppy. "I wanted to apologize for my behaviour that day. I was out of line," the low notes in his voice made the appearance of the apology being somewhat reluctant. Tony probably put him to it after our little burger run.

Irregardless, I wasn't looking to make any enemies. "Me too, I was under stress - not that I'm using it as an excuse," to give where it's due, I nodded at the sorcerer, immediately awestruck by the easy, boyish smile that stretched on his lips.

"You are strong," he added. "If you would like to learn our ways, we would welcome you." There was a spark in his eyes, something belonging to man that respected and collected knowledge. My own respect for him grew immensely just from that one thing.

"I'll think about it," I offered amicably, however, I still leaned heavily towards a negative answer to that particular proposition. I liked my current way of life.

Strange's grin made a momentary second appearance, until Sam's voice rang loudly: "Fire in the hole, Wizard-man," causing the former to groan loudly and look at me.

"Think about your new place for a second," he spoke, briefly touching out fingertips. As soon as that was over, a golden circle with my new living room on the other side of it appeared quietly, Strange's hands immediately going back into his pockets after that. I sighed and pointed the men into it, stepping in a second after. The sorcerer wasn't far behind. "You could learn that, too, you know," he added wryly, having seen my look of mild envy directed at him.

"I think I'll be good with having the 'pissed off the sorcerer Supreme and lived' pass for now," I retorted with an eyeroll, turning around to stare him down.

He had the decency to look somewhat sheepish, at least. "I'm not like my predecessor," his words were chosen carefully. "And, to be honest, I have no clue as to why your... Boss is so hostile towards me- us," Strange looked around the room before unceremoniously beelining for the couch and plopping down on it.

"Not to be a gossip," I started, slightly intrigued. "But Odette and some lady she called ancient had mad beef," I slipped into casual language easily, trying to recall the details of Odette's, quite often jumbled, stories. "Sounded almost like territorial disputes," I shrugged. "And the apprentices Odette took on before me found themselves in all kinds of compromising situations," I chewed on my lip. "Like the Arctic."

Strange rubbed his face with a noisy groan, large hands doing nothing to mask the resignation and slight embarrassment.

I focused on the thin, red scars on his hands - they had to have been something serious, the way slight tremors betrayed the deteriorating state of the nerves in his fingers. I frowned, quickly averting my gaze before he could catch me ogling him. The fact thag Stephen kept his hands in his pockets or covered by gloves at all times didn't go over my head.

He muttered something to himself, something that sounded like he was often forced to clean up his predecessor's mess. "I see," was the only thing he'd offered me, looking slightly pitiful and apologetic.

"Well," I started, noting the last of my stuff was about to be in its rightful place, "as long as you don't toss me into the ocean, I think we can coexist peacefully."

"Tony would kill me if I'd tried," Stephen groused.

"Probably," I agreed. "Considering the fact he hit on me, for you, it would make one hell of a lover's quarrel," my hand pointed towards the kitchen as Steve and Sam carried in the boxes aptly labeled "kitchen", looking around a place to put them down.

"Tony did what now?" Stephen's tone dropped, a wry smirk decorating his lips as he eyed me through his lashes.

"Don't ask me," I raised my palms, feeling my eyes widen. "He's chaos personified and Satan only knows what he's got on his mind."

That squeezed a laugh out of the tall man, followed by a fond, sappy smile as he looked out of my large, panoramic window, probably thinking of Tony himself. There was no doubt, Stephen Strange was utterly and throughly head over heels in love with Tony Stark. Good for them, good for them.

"A-and that's it," Bucky walked in, wiping his hands on a kitchen towel I'd provided them earlier. "I took some liberties and assembled the furniture, Steve is stacking the dishes as we speak," the brunette noisily plopped down next to me, arm carelessly thrown behind me on the back of the couch.

"Oh, um," I stammered, unused to such random gestures of kindness. "Thanks a lot, you saved me a day's worth of time and a backache," I smiled, scooting over to make some room for Sam.

"No problem, not like we had anything better to do than argue which part of the Lord of the Rings is the best," Wilson rolled his eyes, elbowing Bucky none-too-gently.

Bucky elbowed back, thus starting a horsing war between the two, causing me to scoot closer to Stephen as I attempted to avoid any flailing limbs; the sorcerer and I shared an identical, perplexed sigh as to how two grown men could easily bait each other into such juvenile behaviour.

Whatever. It was kind of endearing.

Steve emerged from the kitchen dusty but smiling, having heard the commotion, and quickly herded his guys into a semblance of decent behaviour before all of three of them left, leaving me and Stephen to go back to my old apartment and give the keys to it to the guard. That was done, too, and a portal from an alley behind my old building straight into my living room had me and Strange awkwardly hovering, saying out goodbyes and waving to each other as the golden circle rapidly shrunk in size and disappeared, golden sparks scattering across my living room carpet for a short second before they fizzled out, too.

I used the brief moment of respite to find the small piece of paper containing the rules Porter had insisted I read and take seriously; figuring it might be a good idea to give them a read before beginning to unpack, I popped open a bottle of soda, holding the itemized list written in neat cursive to my face.

The further I read, the further my eyebrows rose:

"1. Keep your door locked at all times.

2. If a person knocks on your door claiming to be the mail man, do not open the door under any circumstances. You are free to ignore the knocking - it only lasts a minute or so. After the person has left, you may open the door and check for any packages.

3. If Samantha from 3B visits you and asks you to babysit, you may do so at your personal discretion. Her twins are a handful and their daily habits are not for the ones with a weak stomach, however, they mean nothin ill and will not harm you in any way.

4. Do not use the elevator between the hours of 1 and 4 AM.

5. There are no apartments under number "7". If someone claiming to be from those apartments knocks on your door and requests entry, come up with a polite excuse to decline and send me a text message. I will take care of it.

6. There is no garden on the premises of this building. If a man approaches you, claiming to be a gardener, don't interact with him and simply walk away. He will leave you alone.

7. You may meet a girl in a polka-dot dress playing in the hallways or in the stairwell. This is Lucy. Always be polite to Lucy - you won't like what will happen if you're rude to her. She does not talk but she knows limited ASL and may request to visit you. Allow her in ONLY if you have fresh meat in your fridge (beef or mutton, preferably bloody). You might want to avoid seeing her eat, however, it might be very beneficial to make friends with Lucy. She knows a lot of things.

8. If, when taking the stairs, you encounter inconsistent numeration of the floors, such as floor 2 followed by floor 5 and etc, simply walk a flight back. It will sort itself out. The building is old and sometimes it gets confused.

Important notice: these rules apply to your guests as well. Please make sure to introduce and educate them on these matters. We will help as much as we can should a situation arise but ultimately, there are fates far worse than an untimely, however swift, death.

- Porter and Lance."

A slow, creeping dread began to gnaw at my nape, curling on like a cold snake deep in chest. As if laughing at me, the warm, welcoming embrace of the green walls and the toothy, wide smiles my landlords had given me encouraged my recently found sense of adventure, all of it mixing into a cacophony of exhilaration and unease, equally steadily driving my running brain insane.

I sighed again, immediately going to the box containing my altar and the rest of the protective items. So much for peace.

Taglist: @couldntbedamned @mikariell95 @letsby @sleep-i-ness @toomanyrobins @mostly-marvel-musings @persephonehemingway @schemefrenzy @lillsxd @bluecrazedandbeautiful @slothspaghettiwrites @xoxabs88xox

#practical alchemy #bun writes #tony stark x reader x stephen strange #stephen strange x reader x tony stark #ironstrange x reader #stephen strange x reader #tony stark x reader #stephen strange x y/n #tony stark x y/n #Stephen Strange x you #tony stark x you

48 notes · View notes

lordeasriel · 3 years

Text

ATTWN: A Look at Miss Brent

I keep circling around the idea of writing And Then There Were None meta, like a full, proper analysis of the novel, but I just can't settle down on how to do it, cause I do have many thoughts, but I can't seem to organise them in a way it will make sense. But-

I was thinking about Miss Brent today, and she's not exactly a character I have that many thoughts compared to Vera or Armstrong, but she certainly has my interest. What strikes me stronger about her is her complacency, in a way.

Let's look at the novel first: here's this sixty-something woman, a spinster who takes on girls from local charities/orphanages to train them into proper maids or whatever. It's not an unusual thing for that time based on the rest of Christie's novels, it seemed like a common occurrence for the period. At any rate, she's very righteous, uptight, her belief is almost borderline fanatical, she never hesitates over her "innocence" in front of the accusations, and the thing is: she doesn't deny shunning the girl away.

Unlike the others, who remain resilient on their innocence (Lombard the exception cause he literally confessed right away), Miss Brent never denies that she did refuse to help Beatrice. In her own mind, she didn't do anything wrong - and if we're going there, in its fucked up way, she technically didn't do anything wrong. She had no familial attachment to the girl, she didn't have to do anything for her legally speaking; morally, of course, she should have but we don't arrest people for being morally corrupt lmao Let alone death sentence them. *coughs*

But what gets me it's her complacency. You know, I'm blaming this on the windy day, but thinking about her, sitting by herself almost all the time (including when she died), she never does anything. Unlike the others, Vera included considering how Christie often writes the women isolated, Miss Brent never gets involved in either investigating or helping them to find a way out; she just sits and knits and eventually bosses Vera around or say some mean stuff to someone. She doesn't act, which is odd for us as a reader; I mean, if I was in her spot I would have already made a signal for help, even with the bad weather lmao This book heavily traumatised me anyway--

Miss Brent doesn't act, that's my main point. In her head, I suppose she expects some sort of divine intervention, in its way; not a miracle, but you know, she expected her righteousness guaranteed her safety. She sees the other deaths as punishment, she thinks them all guilty, perhaps not the General or Wargrave, but I've no doubt she considers the rest of them wicked and deserving of the punishment, but never herself. She didn't do anything wrong, she has got nothing to feel sorry for. There is a whole section, where Vera asks Miss Brent if she is not afraid or if she simply doesn't mind dying. To which she reacts exactly like I said before, like she was above them all, like death wouldn't come for her.

Now, I will just vaguely go over the show because I think their choice of handling her was an interesting one. I like most of the choices made by show, except the ending which I'll save for another day of ranting, but Miss Brent in the show behaves similarly, but her background gets deeper. For one there was two key things - I say two because I've seen two different interpretations of this - and they were 1) repressed lesbian and 2) predator. Now, these two could coexist with each other, she could have been taking in girls to take advantage of them, but I don't know, I think it would be hard for her to do that always, so I like to think if repressed lesbian was it, then it makes more sense for her crime and her reaction. It would be related to a feeling of betrayal - "I've given you a home, a job, affection and you still went behind my back to be a whore" - and it's something Miss Brent would probably not acknowledge. She was always too religious, too righteous, so Beatrice probably haunted her more in death than she did in life: no one would believe this ragged girl over any accusations - even if there was consent on her part. But that's just beside the point.

What I mean for the show is, they go in a different direction. Miss Brent's reactions over the murders are a little more in line with her religious dynamic for the show: when Tony dies, she makes a little prayer, she worries about Mrs. Rogers state when she sees her passed out (despite the fact she humiliated her earlier over being meek and weak and so on), she has a judgemental attitude towards Vera, but even that comes from a place of almost understanding? She still judges them harshly, but she is a lot less harsh to the ones she consider less harmful (aka she is absolutely distasteful about Lombard, whose crime is easily the worst crime in the show and she thinks so).

Of course, all of her views and beliefs and behaviours are based on her own lifestyle, so she is a bit blind and biased - when Lombard points out about the missionaries crimes in Africa, after she calls him out; or when she states she couldn't imagine crossing paths with a man like him, despite the fact she knows well enough they're all there because they're guilty - so she is bound to hypocrisy every now and again. But her fanaticism from the book is turned into a proper, religious attitude; she does abide by the Bible, she condemns very little her other companions (I mean, she still judges Vera over her youth and her inertia, she judges Armstrong's lack of calm, she judges Lombard because well, because of his Existence™ lmao) She is, of course, judgmental and vain and arrogant, but this is less cartoony and more realistic. More importantly, because her beliefs are much more ingrained in her life, she is afraid. She is genuinely afraid and that is an important, key change that I genuinely like.

Miss Brent has faith, at first, that they will leave the Island, so she stills acts very coldly at first and of course, she still denies her guilt, she still claims she did the right thing and Beatrice caused her own undoing. But, the show pursues the idea that Miss Brent, upon being reminded of the event, starts to feel guilt: when she is praying she hallucinates Beatrice (hallucionation was a choice they did to convey these feelings, but you could just claim that's a memory in her head); and more importantly, before her death - which happens the day after she hallucinates - her demeanor changes entirely. She goes from trying to stay calm and resolute before the tide, to feeling weary. That's important because unlike Book! Emily, she is fully aware she has committed a sin, and now whether that is her neglect of Beatrice's pleas or her own feelings for her, that's beside the point. The point is this woman realises she is very close to meet her maker and the burden of having sinned wears her down.

Miss Brent also adds "It's only wool" when Vera is pouring her coffee (which I had to crop cause Gif size), which is her redirecting her distress to something mundane (in another scene later, Vera mentions how doing the dishes is a mundane task, which she finds soothing. In fact, seeking a sense of normalcy is a recurring theme for the show, but also for the book) and ordinary. Vera, of course, notices her distress over being hunted; she shares the feeling, and I don't want to focus too much on Vera because I'll talk about her eventually later, but this shows how Miss Brent changes drastically.

On their first conversation after the dinner, Vera's impression of Miss Brent is of an uptight, self-righteous, straight-up cruel woman and she avoids her if she can help it, and truth be told, Miss Brent does act very badly and says bad things, Vera is not being touchy about it. So when Vera lays the coffee tray, she is ready to walk away before Miss Brent addresses her (she even makes a dry remark on "There is no milk, I'm afraid", which is meant to spite Miss Brent's earlier attitude over asking for perfect eggs after Mrs Rogers died and so on), and Miss Brent talks so unlike herself, a weariness that makes Vera reconsider and come back, to pour her coffee. She feels sorry for Miss Brent, because she finally cracked like the others; Miss Brent knows now that no amount of faith might defend her from this killer, because this killer has got nothing to do with a justice kill.

She stays seated, knitting again, but when she reaches for the coffee she hesitates. She realises Vera could have poisoned it (before entering the room, since she watches Vera pouring the coffee), and then she puts it down. There is a sense of danger in her, and she has no desire to die, unlike in the book where she so casually just stays behind, unafraid in her own attitude of superiority. I like this change a lot; I think showing her fear before her God enhances her religious mania a lot more, because she truly fears Divine Judgement, because she understands, deep down, that she did a bad thing; maybe not murder - I mean, it wasn't murder after all - but she still did a morally bad thing. If there is a Heaven, it won't be for her.

#and then there were none #emily brent #attwn meta #this is my tag for it from now on i'll keep it separate from hdm

25 notes · View notes

imaginariaextraordinaire · 3 years

Text

So much of this episode is about the unacknowledged labour of women, the sexism they face in different areas and the various methods women adopt to negotiate it.

Ji-Woo is such a great character because the show takes the idea of a film star and layers it with angularities and tenderness. She's well aware of what she's sacrificed on the personal front to become the successful professional she is in the present. I love how she's neither ashamed of it nor does she ignore that its a choice that came with lots of unpleasant baggage. We get a sense of this awareness in the conversation she has with Seon-Gyeom in the parking lot (it's also striking me as I rewatch the show that there's a beautiful little arc of Seon-Gyeom and Ji-Woo building a mother-son relationship almost from scratch).

The church scenes are also a great example of show-don't-tell storytelling. While Assemblyman Ki has to bribe and flatter people in order to get their attention, adoring gazes turn to Ji-Woo seemingly automatically. Except of course, it's not automatic, as the conversation with Ms Dong reminds us. Her fame as an actress is the result of hard work and putting everything else aside. I love the easy understanding between Ms Dong and Ji-Woo — both working women, both mothers. There's no shame in Ji-Woo asking Ms Dong to look out for Seon-Gyeom and no recrimination when she says Seon-Gyeom is closer to Ms Dong than he is to his mother. It takes a village, people.

In Ji-Woo and Seon-Gyeom's chance meeting at the parking lot, there's something tentative and formal about them. They're both putting up façades — Seon-Gyeom's polite mask, Ji-Woo's tinkling laughter — although she does allow him to glimpse what lies beneath. Ji-Woo only drops a vague mention of Assemblyman Ki making life miserable for the rest of the family because Seon-Gyeom isn't falling in line. It's obvious from both mother and son's body language that she doesn't need to elaborate. What's lovely though is that there's no complaint in her tone. She isn't telling Seon-Gyeom this detail so that he feels guilty; quite to the contrary. The laughter and ease of her body language is reassuring, as though she's subtly telling him that she can handle this.

While we're on Ji-Woo, how great is her barely-concealed impatience with all the smiling and greeting and praying in church!

I'm not sure what I love more — the shot of a the stained-glass Jesus, looking pained while the minister thunders out a prayer for Assemblyman Ki; or the fact that the very next scene shows a kid throwing a tantrum in a supermarket. It cannot be a coincidence that this is the one time that Seon-Gyeom is filmed from an angle that makes it look like he's descending down upon the kid (whom he bribes with a chocolate bar). Particularly love the longing on the kid's face as she stares at the retreating figure of the divine Seon-Gyeom.

The scene between Mi-Joo and Seon-Gyeom outside his hotel is so heartbreaking to watch and it's the first time we understand just how hard Mi-Joo is on herself. All this began with a drunk professor making offensive, sexist comments that demeaned Mi-Joo, but to explain all that to Seon-Gyeom feels almost indulgent so she takes the blame. She's the disappointment — for being poor, for being seen as someone who can be bribed, for having taken the money. She doesn't hear him when he places the onus of the blame on his father. It's so achingly obvious that all her belligerence is posturing and she's ending the budding relationship between her and Seon-Gyeom because she doesn't think she deserves him.

Thank the gods for May. Even if she and Mi-Joo start off at odds, it takes only seconds for them to be in sync. God bless the womance.

You've got to feel thankful for the family of choice when Dan-Ah bumps into human-trash brother. He's a strong reminder of the everyday sexism in society and how privilege doesn't mean you're protected from this venom.

Over the course of Run On, Dan-Ah figures out how to fight her battles in her own way, rather than by employing toxic methods, like putting her (half-) brothers down because society considers them illegitimate. At this point though, while her brother is disgusting and Dan-Ah is obviously nothing like him as a person, the weapons she uses to fight him — hierarchy, contempt, violence — are the same as those he uses on her.

In the middle of all these tortured, messed-up men, the kids are alright. We know this from not only the way the schoolkids whom Seon-Gyeom coaches react to the bullying scandal — interesting that the children have more perspective than the grown-ups who care about appearances rather than the truth — but also thanks to Yeong-Hwa.

I love Dan-Ah trying to subtle suss out exactly how young Yeong-Hwa is when he and Ye-Joon come to Dan-Ah's office. I also love how not for a second does Yeong-Hwa, for all his puppy-eyes, call her "noona". There's no ambiguity about this relationship. Also, while I still can't find anything remotely good to say about those wretched paintings, the idea that art forges connections irrespective of social convention/ hierarchy is one that has my heart.

If the Gyeommi couple is all about being heard and understood, the Danhwa couple is all about being seen for what you really are.

Speaking of Gyeommi, how cute is it that Woo-Sik is the one playing Cupid! In this episode, Seon-Gyeom is frequently reminded of how alone and solitary he is, but what we also see is that he's building friendships. The relationship with Woo-Sik changes from that of a senior with a junior colleague to something softer, warmer. With Mi-Joo, particularly at the dinner that Woo-Sik organises, you see Seon-Gyeom finding companionship as they attempt to set aside their attraction and actually understand each other. This is a relationship that works because they're so different. The fact that they don't think alike is why she can offer him the piercing insight of, "Why not include your failures as a part of your process?"

Also, what a bombshell to drop on audiences in a country (and continent) known for its fiercely competitive spirit... .

Rewatching this episode, Mi-Joo running back to home to translate the article in which Woo-Sik clears Seon-Gyeom's name reminded me of how different this is from the marathon run. Both times, she's running towards Seon-Gyeom, but this time it's more adrenaline than anything else and it's for him. It's the unthinking running that Seon-Gyeom told her about during their first drinking session — you're just running ahead, without looking back, focused on one external goal. The marathon run is much more internal as it pushes Mi-Joo to make peace with her past before she decides what she wants to run towards.

Also, looping back to that idea of unacknowledged women's labour, Mi-Joo works HARD to make sure the article goes viral and she claims no credit for it. She only tells an online group that she translated it because she knows that they will circulate it with more gusto if they know it's her work. This little snippet is also a good reminder that rarely do things go viral without a whole lotta effort from people in the background.

Finally, this hug in the rain turned me into full mush. By now, we know that Seon-Gyeom has grown up with very little affection. He prefers a hotel room to the family house. The only person he's felt comfortable enough to hug is the housekeeper. As far as he can tell, he has no friends (Woo-Sik and Yeong-Il will eventually set him straight on that account, but for now, he's utterly alone). At this point, the hug from Mi-Joo is something much more tender and basic than romantic love or sexual chemistry.

MJ: Don't tell me you don't know what I'm doing.

SG: I know. You're comforting me.

MJ: Correct.

I can't help but remember the later scene when they'll be on either sides of metal gates, when she won't reach out to him and he'll be upset that she won't trust him. Perhaps that's the difference between finding friendship and falling in love — they both can make you stronger, but the process is very different.

#Run On #Episode 5 #Rewatch #Kdrama #Everyday sexism #Women who work #Womance

45 notes · View notes