#but nothing compares to acid rap

[prettyboykatsuki]

every day i wake up and pray chance manages to drop a project that even kind of compares to acid rap

#aristotle.txt #he is my top 5 artists Ever #but he was that GUY #my happy music #and coloring book was def good #but nothing compares to acid rap #the beats and authenticity the clever and punchy bars the raw lines #u can make good happy music literally i know he can #but only his singles have managed to even come close #it just depresses me so much like his latest album #the big day #is just like COMEDICALLY bad #and i just want him to release more hits so bad #but i just dont think it'll happen </3 #there is literally no project like acid rap and 10 days #those albums are SO fucking good. so so good nothing like it #thats love is the best love song ever i want to play it at my wedding so bad #im holding out for him i am

[beautifulpersonpeach]

I have really truly loved all of NewJeans releases, downloaded Phoning but am too old to be bothered with it (sorry gals) and even would suggest I’m a “Bunny” to a degree, though I don’t have the time to really invest in their content beyond the music. But I was disappointed with this latest release, I find the songs pretty forgettable - with the exception of “bubble, BUBBLE, Bubble, bubble” part — I’ve been in Korea for the last couple weeks and am staying till mid June for work and I do hear the songs being played by stores and heard on the streets but then I kinda immediately forget them 😬. I had to wonder if *some* of MHJ’s ‘whistleblowing’ was knowing she was about to put out a less-than-stellar record of b-sides and that she was angry that Illit got Magnetic? Tbf, if IVE or like, idk, Kep1er (that 1 in the name cracks me up) had gotten Magnetic it would have done super well because it’s just that catchy. Not to knock the Illit girls themselves and the rest of their EP is enjoyable to be sure but not the pop-gold of Magnetic. But again, music is subjective - maybe it’s just me who isn’t catching on with How Sweet. It could be the backbeat makes me think I’m at the roller rink in 1993 at summer camp but still not as catchy as the actual songs from back then.

*

Ask 2:

Same anon who sent the ask about How Sweet & Bubble not being quite catchy enough — honestly maybe the other thing is that I have LOST! (And really all of RPWP) stuck in my head and my poor brain only has the bandwidth for one earworm at a time! 😅

***

It's unfair to compare anything to RPWP.

The NewJeans girls are sweet. They make good music. But nothing they've released so far holds a candle to the magic that is RPWP. There are some people who think the hype around Namjoon’s intelligence is overdone, and like I've said before, there was a time I was skeptical about if he actually knew what he was talking about. But that was years ago and he continues to vindicate the belief I have in his abilities as an artist. Acid jazz, psychedelic rock, Fuji music, new school funk, Korean hiphop - all of that seamlessly combined in a contemporary fusion jazz album, all of it his own creation, made with artists he personally selected and respects. Namjoon is very much worth the hype. He makes music that makes my blood burn.

And yeah Lost is stuck in my head too, the bass sequence on Lost reminds me of the sequence on Pharrell's Happy.

That said, I think How Sweet is my favourite track from NewJeans since New Jeans (the song). And funnily enough, I like it for kinda similar reasons to why I love RPWP: the song is avant garde for k-pop and takes interesting risks. And I frankly just like what I hear.

For example, the genre and bassline. How Sweet is in the Miami Bass genre, one of the more niche sub-genres to break out from 90s hiphop. It never really took on, which might be why it makes you "think I’m at the roller rink in 1993 at summer camp but still not as catchy as the actual songs from back then." G-funk, East-West Coast, and Gangta Rap genres got more popular while only a handful of Miami Bass tracks were hits. In fact the only Miami Bass song I (vaguely) remember from back then was Tootsie Roll (I didn't even fully remember the title of the song, I had to google it lol). ADOR could've made another song in the trap genre since that's a more popular Y2K hip hop creation, and their last song in that genre (OMG) was a hit anyway.

But no. They went with a fairly obscure expression of 90s hip hop, which I think shows the depth of knowledge and appreciation for the that era that either ADOR, Min Heejin, or their producer 250, has. NewJeans don't seem to be doing Y2K-type sounds for the fun of it or just because it's on trend, else they could've easily gone for something more mainstream or more modern/popular takes on that era, like Magnetic. To me, How Sweet shows ADOR is very deliberate in their exploration of nostalgia, and in that way they are the antithesis to what is typical in modern k-pop. [Ironically, Min Heejin's whistleblower report (linked here) explicitly called out the sub-par quality of HYBE's operations teams which I believe includes their A&R team (and I agree btw). And Min appears to be mostly responsible for A&R at ADOR, so in reality, it's unlikely Magnetic would've been a song she'd release, but it's still identical enough to NewJeans' sound to support her concerns about Belift and HYBE].

Also, to my ears it sounds like 250 tweaked the bassline in How Sweet to keep it centered in the mix with the synths, something I feel is innovative given the MB songs I've listened to have the bass more forward in the mix. The topline melody is also soothing over the high-energy instrumental, making it feel nostalgic, but fresh. Like, I'd rather listen to How Sweet than Tootsie Roll to that point, but just like RM's RPWP, it's a song that's strange for k-pop. It shouldn't sell, it's risky, but it works because the artists have already established an identity.

In my opinion lol.

I totally sympathize with you finding How Sweet to be underwhelming though. I've had similar conversations with some friends for both Namjoon and NewJeans' latest releases. If my guess is right about NewJeans, they'll continue their intentional/methodic exploration of nostalgic sounds and concepts, meaning for some people it will quickly become a snoozefest. And of course that's totally fine. Personally, I enjoy it.

#newjeans #min heejin #how sweet #rpwp #namjoon #ador #hybe #bang pd #bpp music posts #kpop #kpop music

[commonwealthoccurences]

Cabin Fever

CW: Suspension of disbelief required.  Friends to lovers, Danse is sweet, etc.

It started with wistful reminiscing. 

The Brotherhood of Steel was on a sort of lockdown. The Institute was getting frustrated with their interference and began actively hunting down Brotherhood members. Elder Maxson wasn’t so much worried about this as he wanted the Institute to think he was; while they were on a lockdown to convince the Institute that they were retreating, scared, Paladins were moving in the shadows in an attempt to gather information and hopefully catch the Institute by surprise. Unfortunately, while Maxson said they provided valuable insight, Sole was not a Paladin.

They had been stuck in the Prydwen for two weeks, and they were past getting cabin fever.

Danse was kind enough to humor them in the few glimpses of free time he had between getting sent out into the Commonwealth. Their musings often turned to before the war. Not out of some stinging homesickness and nostalgia, but for the conveniences and commodities that the modern day should’ve had if the bombs hadn’t dropped. Sole sighed and leaned back. No one was even supposed to be on the decks except for the guards, but they had kindly turned a blind eye when they’d skulked out and sat against the railing for a breath of fresh air. It was minutes after Danse had finished debrief that he joined Sole on the deck and sat next to them, looking out over the Commonwealth. “You’re not supposed to be out here.” He said, though it was little more than a throwaway comment.

Sole smiled and rolled their eyes. They were biting at their nails, a bad habit they had kicked before the stress of the lockdown got to them. That drew a look of disapproval out of Danse, an eyebrow raised and the corners of his mouth downturned. Sole sighed and pulled their thumb away from their teeth and made a point to spit the bit of nail in their mouth between the bars of the railing, off into the abyss of empty air above the Wasteland. “Y’know what I miss?” Sole started.

“Air conditioning?”

“Good guess. It isn’t summer yet, though, you’ve got time before I start complaining about that again. No, I miss peanut butter and banana sandwiches.”

Danse grew confused and tilted his head at them. They had to resist the urge to brush their hand along his jaw in affection, so they looked away instead, squinting at the setting sun. “God, how do I even explain this?”

There was something still so odd about the idea that bananas simply didn’t exist anymore. Sole never really remembered just how much was missing until moments like this, where the reality of having to explain a fruit that had been so common slapped them in the face. “Hmm. I’m sure you’ve seen some examples on old advertisements. Bananas were… long. Yellow. A fruit. Seedless. I don’t know how much more information I can really give.”

“A fruit… were they like mutfruit?”

“God, no. Mutfruit are far too acidic. A little too sweet, too. Bananas were very neutral, soft, not very acidic at all. If you ate one you wouldn’t know they were slightly acidic, even.”

“Sounds good.” Danse offered in reply. 

Sole knew he was humoring them, but they lappreciated it anyway. They stuck their legs through the railing and swung their feet back and forth. There was really no reference for nuts in the Wasteland, nothing Sole could even think to compare peanuts to. They rested their forehead against the railing and looked over at Danse, who appeared to be lost in though. It was mere minutes, though, before a Brotherhood member stepped onto the deck and announced yet another field summons for Danse. 

They couldn’t resist sighing in disappointment as he stood, tucking his helmet under his arm. For a second, he was going to leave without another word. After a year of knowing Sole, he knew goodbyes were hard for them. Instead, he paused in the doorway to the Prydwen and rapped his knuckles against the doorway. “I’ll be back soon.”

He didn’t receive a response, but he wasn’t expecting one. When he returned to the deck minutes later for departure, Sole was gone.

It was weeks of sparse news and shaky reports of survival that kept him from returning "soon." Sole cursed him for saying that as they paced their quarters, their nails all bitten down to the beds and bleeding. Haylen had been kind enough to apply ointment one day without any questions, but their teeth were a force to be reckoned with, and their skin was raw by the next hour. 

Sole knew the risks when they joined the Brotherhood, when they got attached to Danse. They questioned if it was worth it; every breath felt like dry-drowning. Their pacing grew sluggish until they were folded up in a chair in the corner, knees tucked to their chest, startling themself every time they began nodding off. 

News came a week and a half after the scouting unit's last report– two weeks after they were supposed to return. The sudden rushing in the halls alerted Sole that something was happening, but it wasn't until they stepped out into the halls and saw familiar faces on stretchers and the tight-lipped Brotherhood doctors that realization dawned on them. 

Sole didn't have time to get nauseous and start shaking. They'd started moving before they even fully realized what was happening. Protocol called for a clearing of the halls and the orderly, single-file transportation of the wounded before the rest of the soldiers involved could unload from the deck. Sole wasn't sitting and waiting to find out if Danse was one of the wounded. Protocol be damned. 

They dodged medics and makeshift stretchers and shouting assistants like their life depended on it, paying no mind to the cries about their blatant disregard for what the Brotherhood had established. The wind was so fierce it bit at their skin when they emerged from the Prydwen, scanning a crowded deck so fast they felt dizzy. But there was a familiar set of armor amongst the mess of higher-ups and Scribes attempting to help. 

Sole got a running start before Danse even turned, nearly barreling him over when they caught him in a hug, one arm around his neck and the other around his back. "You're alive." They exhaled. 

"We're okay. Just, uh--" Danse shifted their weight off of his shoulder with a grimace that almost hid the red gracing his cheeks. "Dislocated," he explained. 

"God, I'm sorry." Sole took a few steps back, looking him over. 

Other than the way he was holding himself that obviously indicated something was wrong with his shoulder, he had a small gash above his eyebrow. Another scar to add to the list. He seemed okay, though, and he wasn't on one of the stretchers. It felt like the air had returned to their lungs and the sense to their head, if only slightly. "Let's go, I can fix your shoulder."

"I can see the medics after I debrief with Elder Maxson." 

Unfortunately for Danse, the look of furious determination on their face was enough to change his mind. Maxson knew how they were, anyway. He would guess where Danse had ended up. Sole tended to take it a bit personally when Maxson sent Danse on missions where things turned out poorly, especially if it was preventable. 

Humoring Sole as always, Danse fell into step behind them. He was always slightly off when he returned– he couldn't wash the rhythm of being in the field away for hours until he had settled into the Prydwen again. He was still stiff, his footsteps carefully practiced and even in pacing. 

"Ought to strangle Maxson the next time I see him." Sole mumbled under their breath, moving around their quarters. "Lie down."

Danse removed the last of his armor and obeyed readily, familiar with the routine of Sole setting dislocated limbs back into place. They smoothed their fingertips over his shoulder as a silent apology before handing him a rag to bite down on and positioning his arm. Patiently, they waited for his nod of consent before jerking his arm upward abruptly. The groan he let out was one of simultaneous distress and relief as he rolled onto his opposite side; anything to get away from anything touching the area. 

Sole sat quietly on the edge of the bed and rubbed their fingertips across their brow. There was a moment where all was silent except for their breathing; Danse's labored, but slowing, and Sole's steady with relief. "Let me see that cut on your forehead." They requested. 

Danse took a moment to get himself upright and sighed. The blood had already congealed, a scab forming, and they both knew this would be more for Sole's peace of mind. They pulled a first aid kit out of their nightstand and began tapping alcohol out onto a piece of gauze. "How bad was it?" They asked, unsure if they wanted the answer. 

"Certainly not the worst. They figured out what we were doing, somewhere along the way. Set up an ambush. McMullen got the worst of it since he was leading– my shoulder was already dislocated and we had to keep moving, but he'll be alright. Looks worst than it is since you weren't there."

"I should've been there."

Sole's inability to join the Paladins was a tense subject, one that they had furiously fought Maxson on, but had ultimately lost. "Probably would've been better off if you were. But you were safe here."

Sole shook their head slightly and placed a butterfly bandage over the cut. "It'll be a scar by next week."

"Thank you."

They nodded and sunk down onto the edge of their bed next to him. "Oh. Wait."

Danse began rummaging around in the knapsack he had tossed to the side. Carefully, he pulled something out and handed it to them, but wouldn't make eye contact. "What is it?" Sole asked. 

"I tried to– there weren't really adequate substitutes, but– I mean, we ended up in an Institute lab and they had been working on Old World things. Part of it was culinary, and– well, there weren't bananas, but there was banana flavoring, and I made a paste out of fern flowers, because you commented once that they tasted sort of nutty, and–"

Danse's rambling was quickly cut off by Sole's lips pressed against his own, their hand cupping his jaw as they leaned down from where they had gotten up out of a rush of excitement. After a moment, Sole pulled away, and Danse hesitated to open his eyes, his lips still parted slightly. He finally blinked at them. "Uh, yeah."

Sole rushed forward again, pushing him back flat onto the bed, climbing in his lap and kissing him more insistently. Their hand had caught him from hitting his shoulder against the hard, Brotherhood-issue mattress, and served as better leverage to pull him against them. When they finally pulled away again, they whispered a breathless, "Thank you." Against his mouth.

"Uh huh."

Sole sat back against his thighs, refusing to pull away from him, and unwrapped the sandwich. The bread was stale, but all Commonwealth bread felt that way, no matter how freshly baked it was. They took a bite and chewed. And chewed. And chewed. Danse stared up at them and took the time to gather his thoughts again. "Uh… so?" He asked.

They paused. "This tastes like shit, I won't even lie to you."

Sole tried to suppress a laugh, but it broke free. It was hard for Danse to feel disappointed– at least they were laughing. "Really?"

"Yeah. God, it's awful. And way stickier than I expected. I hate to tell you, but banana flavoring barely tastes like bananas." They laughed and leaned in for another kiss, lingering. 

Danse pulled away with a grimace. "Yeah, it's disgusting, and you taste like it now."

Sole chuckled with delight as they rolled away from him, the sandwich abandoned on their bedside table. "You should go debrief Maxson."

Danse sighed. "Yes, I should."

"Mhm." They walked him to the door, but held their hand against it to prevent him from opening it. "And while you're gone I'll brush my teeth, yeah?"

"Uh. Yeah. Sure. That's--" Danse nodded. 

Sole pulled away from the door and grasped his collar, drawing him into another kiss. "Good luck." they said, opening the door for him. Danse emerged from their quarters both bright red and grimacing from the taste. 

Fun fact, banana flavor (the commonly consumed variery) changed in the 50s so presumably the discrepancy that we experience between real bananas and banana flavoring wouldn't have happened to Sole, but again, suspension of disbelief. 

#Fallout 4 #Fo4 #paladin danse #oneshot #fluff #gn sole survivor

[helahades]

By the Water Fountain

(Natasha Romanova x Black!Fem!Reader)

A/N: This is my entry into @fanfictionaries trope challenge! I sort of completely twisted the prompt up. Mine was Best Friend’s Brother.

This fic doubles as a songfic for Water Fountain by Alec Benjamin.

I recommend listening to that song before reading. ( on youtube // on spotify )

Warnings: Red Room like abuse. Codependency. Trauma. Angst. Rejection. Seriously, abuse. Everyone is abused. Injury. Dissociation. Trauma.

Word Count: 3.4k

—

Under a blended peach sky, and during the in between that hangs both the sun and moon, a pretty girl is thinking about her soft and unshakable love for you.

Practice is over, and you’re smiling, looking out across the courtyard from where you sit with Natasha on the fountain’s edge.

“Do’ya ever want to get married, Natalia?”

When you say her name, it’s tangy and sharp, the Russian way, with a hint of Spanish, but gentle all the same. A drip of nectarine streams over your lip and down your chin, and you don’t even catch and cover it like you might if you weren’t high on dreams.

This dance academy seems like forever sometimes—its been years of your life since they demanded your recruitment—but you always take time to dream. If you don’t, Nat won’t, and her unspoken appreciation of your hope keeps the both of you warm.

At first, because she can’t help it, she thinks about marrying you, as if that’s what you meant.

“Maybe someday, I guess,” comes a thoughtful monotone that only Nat can conjure, “Why—you thinking about marrying Alec?”

“God no,” you huff, cuddling into her shoulder as the fruit goes bitter. She opens up to you physically in a minute way, receiving your warmth and closeness despite the neutrality of the coming breeze.

“Well...I just don’t know actually,” you continue, “The two of us fell in love way too young, you know… And I needed him then, so maybe it was more like dependence.”

Shifting on the cool stone of the fountain's edge, you are suddenly aware of the way the tights sit on the skin of your thighs, stretching with each movement.

It becomes hard not to think about the love shell you’re trapped in. Everyone at the academy has found a different way to cope, and for some, including the you of the past, that meant lying with someone just to remember intimacy.

That was before. Before you knew the meaning of the word, and before after dance practice naps in your little haven turned into kissing and heat and softness.

Some days, swaddled up and tangled with the other, you would press kisses under Nat’s jaw, where she smelled like cinnamon and flowers and fabric softener, and she would giggle like the world never gave any weight to feeling. She would dance her fingers along your spine when the peach stretched into moonlight, and the darkness would stun her into remembering you’re promised to another. Her brother.

“Sometimes, Nat…I think I love you instead, and that kinda scares me.”

You look at her, you squeeze the sour fruit.

She says nothing.

Her rejection is acid to your soul.

—

Shadows and blown glass and dried petals and the wood of your apartment at sunset.

It all runs through Natasha’s mind in a haze when she begins to think about the energy here and why she loves it, and why it feels so secret. She doesn’t go this far, but it all feels like sapphic poetry that a man might try to capture, but would never understand if he barged in here. It’s a secret world made for fond hearts.

When the both of you are here, you can pretend that your instructor doesn’t make you repeat across the floor routines til you bleed, or that you haven’t been criticized to the point of tears and vice. You shed the day together, so that when the masks go on in the morning, they aren’t shoved away by the bends of emotion. You touch and whisper and still yourselves passionately, being at one with dancing dust and ticking clocks.

Some days, you can’t explain, but she always understands, it’s easier to lie still and it feels like autonomy after a day of being forced to move. You can’t stop stretching your ankles and marking routines, and some nights you wake sobbing when the transition of a routine leaves you. But she’s here, like she always is, as you are for her.

You remind her to eat, when to stop, and when to put on clothes when the AC chill rattles too bitingly. You dream for her, until she can do it alone, and her soft grins grow into beaming cheesy smiles.

When you kiss her, she’s sweet. Her lips are plump and hydrated (because you can only stop dancing to drink water) and she makes soft sweet sounds against you that run down your throat and into your heart.

When she kisses you, she’s breathless, and she remembers all the ways you taught her to dream. She likes to hold your hand and kiss you languidly or sharply, like you have all the time, or none of it. Hands pushing up tank tops, thighs between each other, collarbone kisses, then Alec. He comes to take Nat home, to tell her it’s time to go, and he kisses you hard and scratchy before slamming the door, stealing your peace, and shattering your haven.

—

It’s not that you don’t like Alec. You did at one point, even feel in love with him. His energy is as strong as his body, and he seems to comically be everything Natasha isn’t. He fills rooms with overwhelming charm, his dancing is sharp, agile, cutting through the air like licks of flame.

You prefer to see Natasha dance in her tortured grace, she can be quick, but when allowed, her grace is slow like a bloom and moves outward from her form.

Natasha and Alec both have learned how to play this system. They’re both clever and witty, but Natasha is the best because of natural skill, while Alec is exceptional because he still runs the sibling rival race that Natasha dropped from years ago.

Alec plays everything to win, he is outwardly passionate, and to be the focus of his attentions is a life secured in… something. You love him in the way that you must love someone that is good enough, that can get you out of here.

If Natasha would say the word, you would leave him. She doesn’t hesitate because of some familial loyalty. Her brother isn’t a jerk, necessarily, just oblivious to the finer things. Nothing about the unique circumstances they’ve survived together brought them closer together as siblings. Natasha didn’t know that hurt people could heal from two into one. She didn’t know people should have someone to confide in, and you don’t really either.

Alec is just… a pleaser. A source of abject power in social circles. He rides the line of knowing how to deliver performance, but knowing which one will get the right results. He controls. And he is incredibly hedonistic. It’s hard not to compare this with how you and your best friend only try to pleasure the other. She lives for your smiles, even if they’re just chemical, and even if she has to squint for them in the moonlight.

There’s just something about having someone who knows hurt in the same way as you without explanation. You scratch a line in the baseboard by your door when one of you sprains or breaks an ankle again from the incessant repetitions forced upon you at the academy. You’re both fucked up enough to laugh about it.

You roll frozen water bottles over knots and stretch through the resistance of scar tissue. When the sky falls into the time of buttery peach, she falls into you, warm like sunset and lovers’ candles. You like to kiss between her thighs, where she smells sweet like sugar cane, even like bubbly hand soap, and you kiss the moons where her nails dug into her thighs too hard when she tried not to let the instructor make her cry. In the soft tissue of your underarms, when you fold over her, sometimes you feel the gentle drag of her body’s scattered hairs. And it’s intimate in ways unspeakable.

She’s pink everywhere. In her cheeks, in the reflection of her hair on the walls, between her thighs, and her lips. She feels vulnerable with you. It’s enjoyable in a way she resists some days. Reminds her of getting tickled. She hates it just like she hates not being able to pull the thread back that unwinds from her heart, and the way she opens when you smile at her.

It’s intimate and innocent the way you learn how another woman’s body can be different. The rounds of your nipples are wider, darker, softer in their edges. The curls of the hair on your mound roll into you, framing you, while Natasha’s aim down, straight, the way rain points down windows. Your eyes are honeyed caramel, Natasha’s are the splashes from the water fountain. You could look at each other forever. But you don't. You have class in the morning.

A frigid and grating rap of knuckles lets you know Alec is here. Shooting up, it’s a flurry of sweatpants and tossed scrunchies, a routine you and your best friend know too well. When you come to the door, he pushes in like he does, kisses you with the sharp grating of his newly shaved face. He groans into it, pulling you in with a scoop of a muscled arm. When he pulls away, your head drops. You can’t see her cat eyes, her firey hair, her composed face wearing its mask before she really should.

“Nat. Walk yourself alone, tonight,” Alec commands into the night, eyeing you with the calm and cool intent of predation, freezing the wax of your candles. The crickets seem too hush outside.

Nat makes for the door, with a face that reads as stoic to anyone who can’t read the slight upward curl of her lips. She pulls the ends up like strings, lest they melt into a grimace in front of this man made of fire.

“Are you sure”—

You knew it was futile before you began. He raises an eyebrow like you’re crazy, and she’s looking back, just for a second, eyes like oceans, before she picks up her bag and is out the door, walking brusquely across the quad.

You wish the chill had swallowed you instead. That you had slammed the door.

Motions happen.

You pull off your shirt, because he never knows how, he carries you to your little bed. His belt buckle hits the floor like a gunshot, and when he crawls over you, you stare at the ceiling.

—

“Baby,” he nudges.

When he touches you, you leap out of the fog, sleep leaving in a gasp.

He knows.

When he passed out without learning to perfectly spot during fouettés, they dumped buckets of ice water on his bare back. Poked him in the ribs for not improving his cambré. Made him balance relevé in the snow, naked, for falling out of it on an off day. You know why he’s the best. And it’s not because he wants to be.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers, accent tumbling. He rolls closer to where you sit, hands pulling your waist til you’re close enough to gather in his arms. He tugs you to lie with him. It’s comfortable enough.

“Baby,” he starts again, massaging a welt on your shoulder, “we need to get out of here.”

You want to scream at how obvious it is. You think about how you’ve cried it on your bathroom floor. How Natasha would say “One day.”

“And baby,” he whispers again, soft like he can’t stop, always, every night, “we’re doing it together.”

He presses a ring into your hand. It might not fit, it’s most likely stolen. But that’s not the point.

“I love you.”

The innocence has left.

—

The sun has risen, the sky is white like it’s running off a dandelion, and you’re in class.

Rose. Roza. You’re the rose, the pretty flower, paired with fire for a man.

You’re in the middle of a showcase—new dancers, new victims watching your display, sitting in a line against the mirrors, watching your demonstration with Alec before they themselves will go on and show their best.

It’s controlled—always. Each turnout and disengagement from the floor matches a single piano note. You face away from each other, the idea being that you can only trust yourself to be on time, and that your partner must know you won’t fail. There is a lift at the end, that depends on this synchronization, and if you fall before Alec comes ready from his pirouette, you’ll surely be injured. He’s always ready, it’s hardly a worry.

Launching out of your plié, you spin like leaves in the wind, like the flower they named you. Catching his eye as he plants after the pirouette, he catches you by the hips, raising you with a press of his shoulders. A gentle wrist, pointed toes, arched back, and the silence of your peers. Nobody claps. Claps are for the surprised.

When Alec lets you down, slowly and controlled, at least fifteen seconds after the final note, you catch a red bun when your vision levels. Mask sealed.

—

“Did you get home safe?”

“We don’t have homes.”

“Clearly not,” you spit, burning with her rejection.

Her face says nothing. You can only hear the spouting, rushing water.

“Does it not matter to you, Natalia,” you question, voice breaking slowly.

Her voice never comes.

“We’re getting married—Alec and I…”

You say it carefully. Like a threat. Hoping she’ll care.

“I remember the you that couldn’t imagine that.”

“I remember the you that didn’t make me want to.”

She looks bored. Like she’s waiting through the tantrum of a child. Your heart swells. Irritated with anger. Mask cracking.

You turn the ring in your pocket, upset with letting her win. Upset with knowing this is how it ends, and that your one day isn’t together. Upset with spending endless nights growing into her, just for her to watch you leave with indifference.

Pulling out a coin, the one that matches hers, the ones that you found before the fountain, you watch where she sits. You watch until she looks at you, and slide it closer to the water. You don’t push it in.

“He says he loves me. Who knows if he means it. But he said it...and you didn’t. I can’t be here forever, Nat.”

She blinks, willing words to come, and as you walk away, they still haven’t.

The sky turns sour.

—

Porcelain. Smooth, painted baby angel porcelain. You twirl like you’re in a music box, like a spring propels you. You dance until the days blend together, and you perform for Americans. You dance until they want to take you.

The rose and the flame.

—

Your American pointes are stiff. They expect you to break in new ones. When the sky turns peach, you’re under fluorescents, twirling like the wind. Twirling for hours.

“I heard Americans smell like wet dogs.”

He doesn’t bother to be quiet, and he’s smiling with the promise of intertwined futures. It also helps that no one practices as late as you, lovers more in love with a journey to come.

“I heard they have a lot of money.”

“That, they do, Roza,” his tongue rolls Russian, and he crosses to kiss the tips of your fingers. He’s so sweet in the nights.

His hands are unwrapped, his regular shoes are on the floor. Your eyes flicker to them, disapproving, before looking at him. Regular shoes scuff the dance floor.

“What will they do?”

He pulls your arms out of third, pulls your hands into his, stroking your locked up knuckles, undoing the forced curves of your hands. He’s telling you to come with him. To rest your overworked body. There will be plenty of time to practice in America.

It’s a sweet moment, soured only by being the wrong ending, and your unfinished business.

“Come with me. It’s our last night in this stupid place. Let’s celebrate.”

You let him pull you close. You kiss him and you mean it.

“I just have one thing to do.”

—

Knocking on Nat’s door, you realize it’s the first time you’ve done so and been unsure if she would answer. It’s 2am, after all, and the words you spoke before were very final.

When the door swings open, not enough time passes for a wait. She hadn’t been sleeping. There aren’t many words. There doesn’t have to be. What would you even say, really?

You go for a hug, but closing the distance, it morphs into a kiss. A gentle one. A sweet meet of the lips. A goodbye. Then, both of you are crying. Neither of you knows enough about America, enough about life without the other...but too much about saying goodbye.

There aren’t any words because they’re the kind of words you’ve already said to other people. The words that you hate to hear, that have been wrung too many times from the back of your throat to cover the spaces between that no language can. There aren’t words to say how this sucks.

Your lover, your confidante, your supporter. You try not to think about that strange fight. You try not to think about how she couldn’t say she loves you. You both know she does. Only she knows that her love won’t save you from this place. If you leave and have a boring life with Alec in some city or countryside, at least no one will beat you again. No more broken ankles, and no more bad jokes about them.

Some place squeezes in the back of your throat, pulling at the wells of your eyelids. When she pulls out your coin, the one you left behind, she presses it into your hand, watery tears on her pink cheeks, and she looks like a peach sky. Standing together with silent tears, it’s a moment before you calm them, breathing together like you would when tears meant harder hits.

You put the coin in your bra, giggling, because there’s nowhere else for it to go. She giggles too, and it’s a stupid thing, but the thing you find, because something needs to do. Something needs to be tallied in the baseboards.

“He’s waiting for me,” you whisper in your watery voice.

It’s always like this. Someone always has to start it with a timer.

You come closer because she’s so warm.

She strokes your face, pushing back some fly away hairs.

“You’ll do amazing. Don’t mess it up there. Don’t doubt yourself. Don’t be afraid of them…”

She pauses, conducting the waves that threaten her composure.

“Don’t forget me...I won’t forget you.”

And that is the most she can give. That is her love, in different words, and that is the most she can say without you deciding to stay. You’d tough it all out with her, but it wouldn’t be right. She will make it out. You need to believe it.

You kiss her again. You hold her hands, and you walk away before more tears fall.

—

When you wake up, your back and legs ache, but the sunlight is in your bones, and your soul is light with new beginnings, and mourning like you’re already gone.

Alec made love to you last night, and you enjoyed it. Maybe… maybe there’s some understanding. Maybe life won’t be bad.

When you’re walked to the car that will take you to the plane, you pass the water fountain. The sky is blinding and empty. So is the seat that Nat usually takes. You taste nectarines.

Alec squeezes your shoulder, and you’re back in the moment. He tells you he loves you, the wind twirling around like a blessing. It feels unearned.

It’s an easy car ride, and as time clicks by on the digital clock, you recoil at the car freshener blowing into your nose with the biting freeze of the air conditioner. You can’t stop watching that clock. You take moments when you know Natasha’s alarm is ringing on her floor, when class starts, when lunch begins.

You think about what the American schedule will be like all the way to the plane. You wonder where you’ll go when the sky turns peach.

Soaring over cities, you see water. You see the glimmer of Nat’s tears, and you wonder if she’ll see the same sea when she makes it out.

You wonder if she’ll think of you too.

—

(reblogs appreciated!)

tags: @xbuchananbarnes (ty honey) @invisibleanonymousmonsters (ily) @threeminutesoflife @honeychicanawrites @sapphirescrolls @tropicalcap @mariahthelioness29 @avintagekiss24 @allaboardthereadingrailroad @venusbarnes @hurricanerin

#fanfictionariesclassictropechallenge #nat x reader #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha x reader #ballet au #dancer!au #nat x black!reader #natasha x black!reader #natasha romanoff x black!reader #black!reader #woc!reader #nat x woc #nat x woc!reader #nat angst #natasha angst

[phantasmaphoria]

Quirk Collection: Toxic

So this “quirk collection” includes references to some drugs (nothing too explicit, but I figured I’d give a warning just in case).

Also, since I really like the idea of having this kind of quirk, I thought I’d also include sections on how they (the quirk users) might deal with it, and what possible implications their quirks could have on the BNHA universe.  (^ ▽ ^)

Quirk: Hallucinogen

The user is able to secrete hallucinogenic poison from their pores, allowing them to put others under drug-like “trips” via skin-to-skin contact. The experience is reportedly similar to LSD and psilocybin mushrooms (also known as “magic mushrooms”).

The calling card of the poison is its hallucinatory effects, though being exposed to it for too long can cause shortness of breath, numbness, and eventually paralysis. Continuous skin-to-skin contact is required in order to maintain the effect.

The user can control when they secrete the poison, though their quirk may also activate under emotional duress.

[Note: Due to the nature of their quirk, the user would probably either be under constant quirk suppressants, or they’d have to hide their quirk from others.

The world of BNHA isn’t exactly a fair one, and since their quirk is similar to actual drugs, they could be targeted for that reason. Another thing would be that their quirk would probably be viewed as villanous, so that’s just one more reason to hide that part of themselves.]

Quirk: Smog

The user is able to breathe out smog, a combination of smoke, noxious gases, and particulate matter (PM). They can’t always control the content of this smog, although it is affected by the pollutants they’ve been exposed to previously.

The user can deactivate their quirk, but it requires conscious thought and effort to do so. A secondary mutation allows their lungs to contain more air (and smog) than usual, and as a consequence, they can inhale and exhale for a longer period of time.

[Note: The user would probably have to cover their nose and mouth with a gas mask or something, since they could pollute the environment and cause harm to others without it.

They might also avoid young children, elderly people, and those with asthma, since they’re more at risk if they ever take off their mask. I can’t imagine that the manifestation of their quirk was particularly pleasant for anyone involved.]

Quirk: Poison Darts

The user has metallic barrels on their knuckles, allowing them to shoot “darts” of poison. The darts are cylindrical in shape, and they dissolve once they hit their target, allowing the poison to seep in.

Effects of the poison include weakness, increased fatigue, aching in the joints, and eventually localized paralysis. The more poison in one’s system, the stronger the effects.

The user isn’t able to control the darts at a distance, but they are immune to their own poison. Overuse of their quirk (firing too many darts) can cause their barrels to smoke and stall, and their knuckles will likely ache.

[Note: Their quirk was likely labelled as “villainous” early on, depending on where they lived and the propensity for quirk discrimination there.

With quirk discrimination against “villainous” quirks, typically those with the capacity to harm but -- usually -- not kill, people can discriminate and bully the victims/oppressed without fear of retaliation, since that retaliation could be used against the victim themselves.

In regards to this quirk, their poison would have been weaker and less potent as a child, making them the perfect target for some quirk-related bullying.

I’d also like to add that no, the quirk title isn’t a misnomer -- it’s not a venom, since the poison can still take effect with skin contact or ingestion. I’m not sure what the word is when a toxin works as both, though...]

Quirk: Dizzy Gas

The user is able to exude a mist-like, gaseous substance from their skin. Though they (the user) seem to be immune, the gas reportedly makes others dizzy and lightheaded, with most comparing the feeling to vertigo.

They can’t control the direction of the gas, but they are able to control the amount they exude. The denser the gas, the more opaque the colour becomes.

[Note: Again, the amount of discrimination this quirk user faces would depend on the amount of prejudice against similar quirks in the area. Although their quirk doesn’t seem very “villainous”, it probably wouldn’t be seen as good for hero work either, since it’s not very flashy and is non-combative.]

Quirk: Spitting Venom

The user’s spit is highly corrosive, burning and melting most materials relatively easily. It does seem less effective against plastics and other man-made materials; however, the spit can be used at a distance and with precision, making its versatility outweigh its faults.

The user is able to produce much more spit than is usual for others with similar quirks. A limit has yet to be discovered. However, their mouth and stomach are the only things immune to the spit, possibly due to the mucus lining both of them.

[Note: This quirk would probably get less of a bad rap than the others, but I’ll still include an entry for its possible uses.

First off, the corrosive properties of the user’s spit would probably be beneficial if they worked in construction or possibly bioengineering, if they were to develop acids -- perhaps as equipment or support for heroes?

If they were to take the hero path themselves, however, they’d probably want containers to store the venom/acid/not-entirely-sure-what-it-is-yet, and their suit would probably be venom-immune, covering their entire body for safety. Both would need to incorporate the user’s mucus, just so they won’t, y’know, melt.]

Quirk: Liquid Daze

The user’s skin is covered by a thin film of liquid, of which they can control. Due to their quirk, their skin must be kept moisturized, which is why they don’t usually remove the film.

Coming into contact with or ingesting the liquid causes sleepiness, artificial calm, and dulled senses. Those who have been under the liquid’s effects typically describe the feeling as “a dream-like state” or “being in a daze”. The liquid also has shown signs of addictive properties, though there is no definitive proof to support this theory.

It is currently unknown whether the user is affected by their own quirk. They seem immune to its direct influence, but constant exposure may have caused indirect effects of which are currently unknown.

[Note: Depending on a person’s attitude toward mental-influence quirks, this quirk user may or may not be discriminated against. They likely wouldn’t be seen as a threat or anything special by the general public, but it would probably be very disorienting if you were suddenly put under this quirk’s effects.

Much like the user of Hallucinogen, they would also probably have to take some measures against being targeted for their drug-like quirk. As for the “indirect effects on the user” thing, you can probably make up your own headcanons for that.

Personally, I think the user would be more calm and/or less reactive, and they may or may not be a bit more sluggish than the average person due to continuous exposure to their own quirk. But hey, that’s just me. I like to keep things open for interpretation, you know?]

#bnha quirk ideas #theme

[nelllraiser]

extermination | luce, blanche, winston, & nell

PREVIOUSLY: Plot Drop Page, Plot Overview

LOCATION: August’s Cave.

TIME: 8:28 PM

PARTIES: Luce Vural, Blanche Harlow, Winston Dane, Nell Vural

CONTENT: Sibling Death mention, Torture (briefly, as a treat)

It was time for one of the final steps before bringing Bea back to this world. Time to cash in on the sacrifice they’d decided on what seemed like forever ago in Bea’s necromancy clearing. Today would be August Thompson’s last day of freedom before they brought him in, and it was quickly coming to a close. Adam had given Nell the instructions on how to find the little rat, as well as set the stage for them, dismantling as many magical obstacles as he could with the genius idea of torple ooze when he’d been here to do recon. Now it was up to them. Nell had asked Blanche to cut the engine a fair distance from the cave August was meant to be hiding in, as there was no need to alert the man that they were coming. Even though he wasn’t a particularly accomplished caster, it would always be better to have the element of surprise. Adrenaline pumping, this wasn’t like Nell’s other hunts, the bounties she took and tracked to bring in for cash, this was personal. There was no talking as they approached the entrance to August's hideout, and as they neared the mouth of his pathetic hideout, she nodded to Luce, silently making sure her sister was ready to get the fire perimeter ready. Of course he’d been holed up in a cave. It was fitting for the filthy, cowardice worm he was.

The entire car ride over, Luce had sat in absolute silence, focusing on her breathing. Though the blood thrummed hot in her veins, the magic yearning to break free and destroy the earth around them, she had held it in check. She’d shut her eyes, practiced her meditation, and let Blanche drive them to the location Adam had given her sister. Adam. She never would have thought the frat boy hunter would be someone she felt indebted to, but here she was. She’d never be able to repay him for what he’d done for her, for her family. As they crept through the forest, Luce maintained her calm expression. She had to hold it together. If her magic went wrong, if her fire burned too hot, got too close-- August would be dead. And he couldn’t die, not just yet. Not until she’d made him suffer. Glancing over at Winston, she checked to make sure they were ready too. “Time to smoke out a rat.” She muttered under her breath before releasing her magic. Fire shot out from her fingertips, creating a semicircle of flames around the mouth of the cave. The flames weren’t high now, but with time, with power, she’d be able to create a wall of fire. He’d have nowhere to scurry off to then.

There wasn’t quite a word for how Blanche felt about August Thompson. Hatred was good, for what he did to Nell and for what ultimately happened to Bea, but it wasn’t exactly useful to focus on that as she cut the engine when directed. August was a means to an end - he deserved to die for what he had done, and his life could be used to bring back Bea. It was perfect, really. She was hot on Winston’s heels as they sped quietly through the forest on foot. They left the car behind, but it shouldn’t be too hard to drag the little worm back to it once they got their hands on him. Luce and Nell would distract him while her and Winston would go in and grab him. August likely wouldn’t go down without a fight and while she didn’t have magic or reliable telekinesis on her side, she did have acidic mace from Cece and her taser on her.  Luce’s wall of fire went up, surrounding the perimeter to smoke the dickhead out. She swore in the distance that she heard some sort of shrill screech as they approached. Blanche scoffed. Worm boy, here they come. Blanche didn’t start worrying until she heard faint knocking sounds, like someone was rapping their knuckles hard on a wooden door. She paused, eyes narrowing in the darkness. “What the hell is that?” Blanche hissed quietly.

Watching the wall of fire explode around their target’s house, Winston swallowed and tried to keep their breathing even. A quick puff of their inhaler later and they were creeping closer and closer. They were well prepared with a variety of gadgets, the taser that they had been working on and even the hunting knife that Ariana had given them from Celeste’s collection. They weren’t sure why they needed a knife but it felt right. “I don’t know what the hell that was,” Winston paused as they listened for the knocking noise before it was joined by a shrill cry. Was that an old women? Winston wasn’t sure but they could definitely hear something. A sing song voice bouncing the wind. “Have you come to get me?” it asked playfully and then almost out of nowhere Winston spotted a small boulder the size of a basketball sailing towards Blanche’s head. “Watch out,” they shouted as they focussed on creating a barrier between Blanche and the boulder. A field of energy jumped to life between them and the boulder crunched against it with a crack before shattering into smaller pieces with a shower of dirt and gravel. “That was close, he’s got something here.” Winston said, looking around, the sing song voice and sound of knocking filling the air as they crept forward.

A smirk played on Nell’s lips as Luce’s fire sprang to life, blue flames reflecting in her eyes as she reveled in the fact that there was no escape for August now. She wasn’t nervous or scared, for she knew perhaps better than anyone the shortcomings of August Thompson. After being compared for most of their lives, it was hard not to. So no, she wasn’t worried about how smoothly this capture might go. Nell was eager to see the look on his face when he realized it was over, the way his fear would grip him as it dawned on him that he wouldn’t make it out of this, that he was a pig for slaughter. They’d make him hurt the way he’d hurt her, Luce, Winston, and Blanche. “His tommyknockers,” she said quietly as the things grew closer. It wasn’t all that much of a surprise to her, as they’d often been made to practice summoning together, and knew each other’s creatures of choice. So she’d come prepared, and quickly handed an iron dagger to everyone to help with the dispatching of the creatures. “We can make a path for you to get through to August, Winston,” she said as the hairless, wrinkly, creatures finally stepped into the light of the fires surrounding them and out of the maw of the cave, advancing quickly. “Happy hunting.” Then she was left to dodge a boulder that seemed to soar out of nowhere, rolling until her dagger was buried in the chest of a tommyknocker. One down, however many more to go.

“Of course that little piece of shit has Tommyknockers.” Luce grumbled, her hands outstretched, feeding the flames around them. She couldn’t lose her concentration, she had to make sure that the barrier remained secure. If August got through and escaped because of her, she’d never forgive herself. Concentrating on making sure that the flames continued to build and rise and burn, she watched as Winston deflected a boulder from smashing Blanche into the dirt. “Nice.” She nodded in their direction. As Nell pulled out her blade, Luce glanced over at Blanche. “Those fuckers don’t have nothing on us, but stay safe.” She said, not wanting the girl to get hurt. Blanche might have been able to talk to ghosts, but she was still just a human with no other major powers that could stop her from getting flattened by a boulder or stabbed by a knife. She didn’t want to be responsible for someone else getting hurt because of all this.

 Blanche watched the boulder come soaring into her face, deadpanned, before Winston shattered it into pieces. If she got taken out by some wimpy ass tiny boulder, she was going to be so pissed. “Who the hell names a monster tommyknockers,” Blanche muttered, taking the iron dagger from Nell without a complaint. She looked to Luce, giving her a wry grin. “I’ll be alright, don’t worry about me,” Blanche promised. She felt the nervous tingle of adrenaline in her body, tingling under her skin as she stepped forward to sink the dagger into one of tommyknockers - sparring with Nell finally was paying off, it seemed. Or, hopefully. Maybe she was a little clumsy, but she could fare on her own from them, and long enough so Winston could get a path back into the cave to grab the little weasel. She planted her foot into one of their stomachs, sending it sprawling backwards - and then she felt it. A small burst of energy that she used to throw the teeny eyed hairless creature into another. Good. Good! And she didn’t pass out! But as Blanche rushed forward to start stabbing them, ducking under another flying boulder as she went. “Winston, go!” 

As Blanche and Nell began clearing a path through something that they referred to as Tommyknockers, Winston forced themselves to choke back laughter at the name but sprinted off. The Tommyknockers were still pouring out of the cave and Winston jumped clear over the head of two before pulling out the knife that Nell had given them incase any decided to follow. They however seemed to have been kept relatively busy by their companions. Winston was glad that Nell and Blanche were here to keep everything busy and Winston was still incredibly impressed by everything that Luce was doing. That kind of magic would’ve knocked them out instantly. Hurrying into the cave, Winston followed it until the sound of the fighting behind them had faded away. There was a faint drip in the background that was almost too cliche for Winston to not say something, but there was no one to say something to. Instead, they reached up and whispered a quick spell. The runes on either side of their glasses glowed for a second before the lenses began to lighten and Winston could see much more clearly in the darkness. Night vision glasses were a cool idea, they just hoped it worked consistently. This was their first opportunity to really try them. Creeping forward, they began the search for August, who was apparently hidden.

Nell barely registered Blanche’s humor towards the creatures, far too focused on taking them out to take the time to laugh. She’d entered a mindset similar to that of the Ring or when she was after a bounty, but even more so sharpened, the stakes being much higher this time. As soon as one Tommyknocker fell under her knife it was on to the next, dodging rocks and the mangly arms of the summoned creatures alike as her knife kept finding targets, each kill making her bloodlust grow. She didn’t want these pitiful creatures, she wanted August. Somehow, in the middle of it all she managed to spare Blanche a prideful grin, still sharp with her desire to end this. But it was quite a ways Blanche had come with her telekinesis. Nell watched Winston disappear into the mouth of the cave, watching anxiously for them to return. For a moment the Tommyknockers stilled, the last of them pausing to join hands as their little bodies began to shake with effort. A low rumbling began, and slowly but surely, an avalanche of boulders began to fall from above. Shit. Instinctively, Nell dropped her knife, hands raising to the sky to form a shield-like dome not unlike the one she’d made when the Devil’s Gullet had exploded on her and Blanche. As each boulder hit and rolled off, it fell to the ground around them, spinning through Luce’s ring of fire to disappear. 

Breathe, just breathe. Luce used her breathing as the tempo at which she set her magic, letting the flames rise and fall with every intake of breath. Sweat dripped down the side of her face as she lowered her hands to her side while the flames continued to burn. She didn’t need her hands to maintain control over the fire, she could hold it all the same. The flames continued to rise and burn, illuminating the mouth of the cave with their eerie blue glow. She watched as Blanche and Nell fought the tommyknockers-- her eyes growing wide as she watched two of the creatures go flying away from Blanche. The flames flickered a bit and Luce fought to maintain control. She’d ask about it later. Instead, she kept her eyes peeled, moving out of the way of boulders that flew towards her. It took every ounce of her concentration to maintain the five foot wall of flames, but this was the only way she could help. Shields and stealth, she couldn’t do any of that. But, she could keep August trapped here. She could make sure he couldn’t escape. “Nice one.” Luce called out to her sister with a nod of approval as the boulders went careening over the wall of flames. They’d get this son of a bitch. Then they’d be one step closer to getting Bea back.

“Oh shit!” Blanche could only gape at the avalanche of boulders. Nell too care of it instantly, her knife falling to the ground as the tommyknockers joined hands, vibrating with effort to keep the boulders coming. She saw that once before, way back in January. The official confirmation that Nell and the Vural’s were spellcasters. She shook her head, using her free hand to pull her trusty can of mace from her pocket. Flicking the cap off, she sprayed. Cece had been a gem, fixing Blanche up with another can of the deadly, sprayable acid. The concentration of the Tommyknockers broke as Blanche aimed for their eyes, the knocking sounds turning into wails, their voices turning into wails as the boulders slowly came to a halt. Their chained hands broke and Blanche scoffed, shoving the mace back in her pocket and taking her knife to one’s throat. Oh. Gross. Gross. Grossgrossgrossgross - her stomach churned Blanche shoved it away from her, disgusted. She would absolutely throw up, but like, maybe later. Definitely not now. “Ew, ew, ew!” She could fight these things for a while longer, but she cast a worried glance into the mouth of the cave. Should she go after Winston? Did Nell want to go after Winston? “Come on, Winston..” Blanche muttered, kicking another tommyknocker away from her. “Grab the little shithead and let’s go.” 

Slipping through the cave, Winston was pretty sure that they heard an earthquake outside, but decided that it was more important to get August and to get out. They spotted them eventually, cowering at the end of the cave. He brought his hand up and looked at Winston. “You, please, help me, they’re psychopaths they’re going to kidnap me and kill me and,” Winston ignored August’s pleas. They knew that this wasn’t really the right thing. Killing someone in exchange for someone else wasn’t something that Winston could condone in their own head. But they didn’t care. They were taking control now. Winston fished in their pocket and threw a spherical object straight at August’s chest. It hit with a thud and latched on, seconds later thin wires exploded from the middle of the object as Winston forced the slender metal tendrils tightly around August, binding them in place. Fishing into their pocket, they slipped a ball gag into August’s mouth and secured it. Patting his cheek with a smile, Winston pulled him close. “August, I never knew you, we never met. But you fucked with Nell and you fucked with Bea, so I’m going to help them kill you and we’re going to bring her back. Then it’ll be like you never existed and the world will probably be a happier place for it.” Grabbing August’s skinny frame, Winston began dragging him from the cave, which was easier said then done because he was a little shit who wouldn’t stop wriggling and wouldn’t walk straight. “Uh, a little help, please.” 

The avalanche finally came to a halt, and Nell released the magic of the shield, feeling it still sapping away at her energy. Blanche had done a lovely job continuing to cut their numbers as Nell kept the boulders at bay, and her pride surged once more. It looked like those sparring sessions with Blanche were paying off. She wiped at her brow, blood from her kills leaving a line on her forehead, and then she bent to pick up her knife once more. It was time to be done with these little gremlins. In a moment she’d retrieved the knives she’d given to Blanche and Luce, letting them join the ranks of the one she’d been using. She let her magic pool around her until it grew so bright that it was hard to look at, and promptly thrust it into the faces of the remaining Tommyknockers, stunning them in place. Nell ran on the heels of her magic, using it as a cover while she darted in, throwing a couple of the knives with enough force to pin the little shits against the rock of the wall. From there it was quick work to delve the last of the knives into their hearts, ending them then and there. As if on cue, Winston appeared from the cave as the light of Nell’s magic faded, and she nearly breathed a sigh of relief. But rage was quick to fill her once again at the sight of August, and she wasted no time in going up to the man Winston had gagged and bound before harshly kicking him between the legs, reveling in the way he crumbled to the ground in pain. “There we go. Did you miss us, Auggie?” 

When Winston emerged from the cave, August bound, gagged, and trying to squirm away, Luce could feel her blood boiling in her veins. That little fucking bok çuvalı, thinking he could get away with this, that he could run off and pretend like he’d done nothing wrong? Cutting off the magic, the blue flames simmered and died down as she took a step towards him. The effort of it all had been immense, but she still had enough in the tank to walk. Watching as Nell kicked him between the legs, Luce bided her time. She had plans for August. Lydia still had her debt to pay and it was time for her to cash it. She didn’t know how the woman was going to help her get revenge on August and she didn’t really care. All that mattered is that she would. “Hey, August.” She growled from behind her sister, waving a hand at him. “Long time no see.”

 Nell took care of the remaining gremlin things with swift magic, and right on time too. Paintings slightly, she squinted at Winston as they walked out with August bound and gagged. “Ouch,” Blanche said plainly, with a shrug. She bent to help get August back to his feet, though if she were being honest she wouldn’t have minded dragging him, letting his head hit every rock and tree branch on the way back to the car, but she was tired now and that would probably take a lot longer than forcing him to walk back to the jeep. “Come on,” Blanche grunted, shoving him forward. “We do not have all night.” The walk back to the jeep was relatively silent, save for the August’s feeble attempts at screaming. It didn’t seem to truly hit him that this was actually happening until Blanche unlocked her car. The beep caused August to dig his heels into the ground and Blanche to crash straight into him. Blanche scoffed, August’s muffled cries getting louder and louder until - He was sent straight to his knees with a long and violent zap and low wail of pain. She stared at him. And then did it again for good measure. Blanche looked down at him, unimpressed as she clicked the safety back into place and handed the taser off to Nell. She rounded to the trunk of her car, popping the trunk. “Do we want to stick him in here?” she jerked her thumb at the trunk. “I have blankets.” 

Winston had made their threats. But they couldn’t help but wonder if they were really giving August enough of a hard time. Those fears were well and truly assuaged by the treatment that August got at the hands of Nell and Blanche. They hustled August towards the car and Winston slipped the trunk of the car open. “Well, considering that we can stick him in there and cover him with blankets, I’ll put a muffling spell on the trunk just in case anyone drives past.” Winston knew that they were going to need to get August from their cave back to the Vural’s without anyone seeing them and that seemed like the best way. “Get in,” Winston ordered as they shoved August into the car, “or my friend will zap you again.” That seemed to be more then enough encouragement for August and Winston slammed the door of the car shut as they slipped into the car next to Blanche. “He’s not going to get out of those wires without the magic key word and he can’t talk, Luce I’ll text it to you so he can’t hear it.” Winston said, already sending the message out to their group thread. “We should get going though, that made a lot of noise, those, Tommy…. Knockers.” It sounded sexual. Winston didn’t want to admit it but there it was. 

“Does he deserve blankets?” Nell asked back haughtily, though the attitude was strictly aimed towards August. She still blamed herself for Bea’s death, but she could only emotionally beat herself up so much. Now that August was in front of her, another party that was responsible for Bea’s death, here was a physical being she could hurt, within reason, of course. He needed to be relatively intact for the ritual. She smiled sagely as Blanche tased August, looking to Blanche with shining eyes full of thanks as she was also handed the taser. Getting into the car, she made sure to place herself next to August, waving the taser in front of him for a moment with that same, jubilant and savoring grin. “Something to keep us entertained on the way, yeah?” she asked before jabbing it back against his skin, letting the electricity jolt through the sad excuse for a human. A soft chuckle fell from her as he convulsed again, relishing the feeling of finally having him in their grasp.

Watching as Blanche and Nell took turns tasing August, Luce stood behind them. She’d join in later. For now, they needed to get him out of here. They needed to get back to the house, where she’d make the transfer over to her car and drive him out to Lydia’s house. Pulling out her phone, Luce sent a quick text message to Lydia, telling her that she was cashing in her favor. “Doesn’t matter if he deserves them, I don’t want him knowing where I’m taking him.” She said and threw the blankets over his head. Settling next to Nell, she watched as her sister sent jolt after jolt of electricity into August. Luce’s fingers twitched at her side, small sparks of flame dancing across her hand. She wasn’t strong enough, not yet. But one day… Her hand curled into a fist at her side and she looked at August, at his squirming, twitching body, still struggling against the bindings. With a growl, Luce slammed her elbow into his back. By this time tomorrow, they’d have Bea back. By this time tomorrow, their family would be whole again. Three would be one again. Tomorrow couldn’t come soon enough.

Kidnapping was a new one for Winston. But as with everything that they had learned and done in the last six months, Winston couldn’t help but feel slightly out of their depth. The idea that they were about to embark on a journey to do something that was fundamentally against the law of nature and physics and biology and in so many ways seemed counterintuitive was not Winston’s favourite. However, they were pleased with how well the tech magic had worked so far and they were also pleased that they could help their friends. If nothing else this looked like it was entertaining to Nell. Winston didn’t get involved in the abuse of August, it wasn’t their style. He was going to get his just reward soon enough. Winston was sure that their friends were doing a good enough job anyway. Making sure that August was securely in place, Winston adjusted the blankets before turning as they set off into the night. Only one thing left to do.  

#wikedswriting #chatzy #ch:luce #ch:winston #ch:blanche #miss beasha #extermination

[calorieworkouts]

Is White Rice Healthy for You, and Why More Athletes Prefer it Over Brown Rice

Is white rice healthy or not is an inquiry that many ask when putting with each other a well balanced meal plan. It is not a surprise that athletes experience an extensive workout and health and wellness routine to get their physical proficiency. Also though exercise constitutes a substantial part of it, nutritional habits also add considerably towards this. When discussing food habits of athletes, one of the most debated amongst all food products is nothing greater than the humble rice.

But an usual complication is if white rice is healthy and balanced as well as if it's alright to make use of as a major staple or if wild rice is the way to go? Before you can address that question it's crucial to recognize the distinction between both. The rice grain is composed of three various components the bran which is the firm out layer, the bacterium as well as the endosperm. When the grain is entire it is considered wild rice or Whole grain rice. White rice is the internal endosperm component that is generated after it is grated to get rid of the bran as well as germ. Leaving the little white component which is cosy when cooked as well as is carb rich as well as complements the majority of foods as well as even more pleasing on the palate. It's the bran as well as the germ is the component that contains many of the fiber, anti-oxidants, vitamins as well as minerals. Therefore white rice gets a bad rap for being vacant calories.

However While there are some that swear by the healthy web content of wild rice, others think about white rice equally as healthy and balanced and also the most effective option. It's not a surprise that brownish rice has developed a location for itself in the listing of 'health food'. There are still some pointers which put white rice in a relatively better light, particularly when it involves athletes.

The Situation for is White Rice Healthy?

The point about white rice is that it includes a greater degree of glycemic worth. It is recognized to give quick gas to the body for people undergoing extensive workouts and managing muscular tissue healing. It is a basic and secure carb which does not include any kind of adverse results on the body like stomach problems, allergic reactions, and so on. Whole grains like wild rice bring phytic acid (phytate). It is an agent which drives away the nutrients from the body. This avoids the body from absorbing critical minerals like calcium, iron, magnesium and also zinc. So for athletes or very active people seeking to take in a lot of calories and also have a high-calorie melt price white rice is a lot more efficient selection.

Better Carbohydrate

Athletes have no leisure to captivate tummy concerns which the usage of brownish rice can cause. Brownish rice includes a greater amount of fiber. People dealing with food-related issues may deal with problem while consuming entire grain. The extensive physical activity called for by a professional athlete needs a higher intake amount of carbs. That is ideally around 60g/h of carbs. This is especially real for exercises lasting longer than both hrs. Describing white rice healthier as it is a risk-free carb makes overall feeling. It is best to intake it before a workout session. It is relatively very easy to absorb and also satisfies the physical nutritional requirements well.

Best for Workouts

Since rice is richer in carbs compared to potatoes, regular rice is healthy as well as recommended for pre and post-workout dishes. It is a meal which makes sure that the body is obtaining enough nutrients for affordable physical sporting activities. This makes it the best-suited option for weightlifters as well as sportspersons. It is not the ideal food option out there for underactive people. This includes individuals training less than 4 days a week and also suffering from a slow-moving metabolism. In this instance, wild rice occurs to be the best choice.

While it is true that various people react to various food types in different ways, there is a reasonable situation in favor of white rice in location. This is real for athletes having a high physical need as well as requiring certain sort of diet for their picked job. We urge you to take and provide both alternatives a reasonable study before selecting the kind of rice for your diet. A professional athletes body is an investment and also one ought to be mindful concerning what to place in their body. Taking a well-researched, computed decision can save one from a great deal of extraordinary physical troubles later on on.

#exercise #exercise routine #fitness #fitness women #health #health and wellness #physical activity #weight #wellness #workout #workouts

[szopenhauer]

Do you have pockets in anything you are wearing currently? I don’t

Have you ever tasted your own tears? it’s hard not to when you cry so often

Do you hang your clothes outside or put it in the dryer? outside, not during wither tho

Do you like the letter q or the letter z better? Z

Do you do anything weird in your sleep? who knows

How many times can you jump in jumproping? I didn’t jump for a long time now so I dunno if I can jump as many times as I used to - doubt it

Do you like the beach? I like wet sand, beachcombing

Have you ever built a sandcastle? I suppose, I want to do that again sometime

Is there a mirror in the room that you are in? not a hanging one

What color is your comb? one is white and other two are red

When did you pull out your first tooth? I don’t remember

How old were you when you said your first word? same

Have you ever had a pet rabbit? hell no

Do you like the autumn? it’s fine unless weather gets really cold and snowy

Are you good at drawing? a bit

What is your Hogwarts house?  Ravenclaw?

Have you ever seen the Percy Jackson movie/s? nope

Ever seen Glee? fragments

Do you like Demi Lovato? Name a song by her. not a fan

Tarzan or The Lion King? Tarzan, from Lion King I only liked Timon and Pumba and I didn’t cry when Mufasa died

Lilo & Stitch or Moana? Lilo and Stitch

Hercules or Pinocchio? Hercules

Rugrats or Powerpuff Girls? Powerpuff girls

Ever seen Pretty Little Liars? no

Baking or dancing? dancing 

Sports or shopping? shopping

Blue or yellow? yellow

Green or pink? green

Did/do you go to a public school, a private school, or homeschool? public

Do you have a secret sideblog? not anymore

If you could teleport anywhere in the world right now, where would you go? if I could teleport once I would save that ability for special occassion like emergency but if I was able to teleport whenever then hmm...

Do you have/would you get your nipples pierced? nah

How would you spend a million dollars? buy an apartment, help my parents, live better *maybe even make a movie?

What’s your pet peeve? I have so many

Do you like paper books or ebooks better? paper

If you could live in a fictional world, what world would you pick? Moomin valley

If money was no object, what would your wardrobe be like? big hahaha

If you could marry any celebrity, who would you pick? well I don’t know them personally so it’s hard to say - just choosing based on their look? hmm...

Who do you text the most? my gf

If you had to choose, which sibling would you live with? I only have a sister so... I would prefer not to live with her again, thx

When was your last date? last week

Are there any people at your job who absolutely hates you? if I had a job...

Do you prefer cool, warm or neutral colors? depends

Have you ever taken art classes? I have

Do you know how to work a cash register? I hope I didn’t forget much about it

Fact or fiction novels? fiction

Do you think you’re a clingy person? am I?

Do you enjoy kisses on the cheek? not really

How often would you say you disagree with your parents? often with my mom, rarely with my dad

Have you ever slept with your window open? nah

What color are your mother’s eyes? brown

Do you cry easily? very

Have you ever been into a court room? field trip in middle school

How many necklaces would you say you own? too many as for someone who never wear them.

What time do you plan on waking up tomorrow morning? wish I didn’t have to

Do you enjoy receiving souvenirs? buying them myself

Do a lot of people dislike you or is it the other way around? it’s both ways

What’s the worst part about school? bullying, grade stress, unhealthy eating, sitting all day long, walking there in the cold and snow during winter etc.

Would you ever consider going on a cruise? nah

Do you still act childish most of the time? often

Did you ever enjoy gym class? at times I enjoyed PE

What is your biggest insecurity? dunno which is biggest, I have plenty of them

Have you ever painted a room alone? not alone but helping

Speaking of which, when did you last paint your room? ages ago

Do you know how to garden? but don’t like to

Do you have any bad habits? shitload

How old were your parents when they had you? in their 30s

What is the most amusing thing on the internet, in your opinion? memes?

Do you try to spend a lot of time with family? compared to some people I spend lots of time with my parents

Do you need to clean your bedroom? yeah

What do you plan on doing with the rest of your life? we’ll see

Which decade were you born in? 90s

Are you good at giving advice to people? but not myself

Is there anyone out there who makes you feel completely useless? I am useless

Do you like texting or calling people more? text

Do you have a lot of friends? I don’t really have friends

Have you ever thought of someone as useless? myself for example

Can you count to ten in another language other than your own? english, polish, russian

Does photography interest you at all? kinda

Do you think you’re a good singer? am not

Do you think you have a good sense of style? I have my own style

Do you enjoy reading often? not often

Are you afraid of lifts? I prefer to take the stairs

How exactly are you feeling right now? Why do you feel the way you do? emotionally/mentally bad because of family and health issues mostly, physically my usual so not the best but can’t complain much

Has the last person you held hands with, ever told you that they love you? yes

Which do you think is the worst - saying something and then wishing you hadn’t, or not saying something and wishing you had? saying smth and wishing I hadn’t is worse to me

When was the last time you saw your grandparents? I saw my grandma almost 3 years ago

Have you ever felt really attracted to someone, but been deterred because you found out they didn’t have a very nice personality? omg more than once

Have you ever hugged/kissed someone you’d only just met? hugged, not kissed

Would you ever apologize for something that wasn’t your fault? I do that sometimes

Has anyone ever cried in your arms before? sure

Do you keep a lot of things from your parents? basically nothing

Using one word only, describe the day you’ve had so far. Sunday

Have you been annoyed at someone/something today? I still am  Are you avoiding anybody at the moment? you could say that Is rap your favorite genre of music? it’s not Have you ever lasted a relationship longer then two months? yep Is it safe to walk around your neighborhood at night? not for me Are you a fan of heights? nah but I’m not super scared of heights Rate your typing speed on a scale from 1 - 10? almost 10

Do you text more then you talk on the phone? obvi Are you scared to grow old? to get more ill

Do you use a dishwasher or wash dishes by hand? by hand, I hate dishwashers

What is the best pharmacy near you? they’re not that good 

Do you use public transportation? yup

How much does it cost for you to laundry (if you use a slot machine)? we have a washer at home

Do you make your bed every day? I’m lazy and it’s unhealthy to so I don’t

Do you save receipts? depends

Do you use re-usable bags at the grocery store? yep

Have you ever burnt yourself with the glue gun? slightly

Wall calendar or desk calendar? pocket :P 

Does your home have a basement? it does

How often do you clean? clean what?

How often do you go grocery shopping? often

Ever bought a lottery ticket? few times

Do you gamble? online for free at times

Do you ever sleep on the floor? sleepover

Which room do you stay in the most? mine

Ever worked two jobs or more at once? noooo

Do you live in an apartment, condo, house, or dorm? house

How often do you go see a doctor? too often

Do you have acid reflux? chronic

Do you snore? no

Are you on birth control? I’m asexual and into women 

Do you put on make-up in the bathroom or the bedroom? I did it wherever

What is the first site you go to when you turn on your computer? fb

Which email service do you use? wp

How often do you check your email? usually rarely

How old were you when you got your first phone? I was in middle school

Did you own a Britney Spears album? I don’t listen to Britney Spears

What sites are you on? plenty

Does the door to your room have a lock? I wish, it has a funny stuffed/plushie one What type of skin do you have? mixed Ever gotten beer poured all over yourself? luckily not, gross *from what I remember someone poured wine or beer on my shoes once in the store by breaking the bottle and didn’t pay for anything  Who’s the last person you had a sleepover with? John  Who’s the last person you wanted to kiss? my gf Can you keep a secret? not really When’s the last time you went on a walk? this evening

Do you feel uncomfortable when people you hardly know confide in you? if they use me 

Have you ever regretted what you said in drunken conversation once sober? never been in such situation

Is there anything coming up which you’re dreading? it’s complicated

Do you ever do tedious tasks just to keep your mind occupied? I have my usual things/distractions that I do everyday

Have you ever lived with somebody with truly repulsive habits? could say so?

Do you tend to say things because they’re appropriate not because you mean them?   sometimes

What was the last thing to fascinate you? smth I saw on the internet?

What was the last thing to annoy you? someone close to me

When did your hard work last pay off?   basically never

When did you last feel a need to be alone? almost always?

When did you last REALLY want to go out but couldn’t for whatever reason?   covid and my other health problems but also money

Have you ever eaten chocolate for breakfast? nooo

Do you like balloons? I do (don’t worry tho I can do without them)

When will you next go to the beach? *shrug*

If you have pet fish do you bother to name them?   if I had fish I probably would name them

Did you ever read the Terry Pratchet “Disk World” books?   I hate Pratchett

Do you keep your eggs in the fridge? of course

Have you ever owned chickens? I wanted to

Do you like classical music? at times, some songs

When did you last listen to music?   this day

[grimelords]

My March playlist is finished! This one is slightly more diverse than usual, swinging all the way from vibraphone jazz to Bhad Bhabie to black metal so I’ve taken the liberty of actually sequencing it properly for you. So if you’ve got 3 hours you can listen to this straight through and be taken for a hell of a ride. No matter what you like I’m sure you’ll find something in here that you love.

Tahiti - Milt Jackson: For an unknown reason I had a big jazz vibraphone phase this month and when you're talking jazz vibraphone you're talking the Wizard Of The Vibes himself, Milt Jackson. I feel insane even having an opinion on this but it's a shame that some of the best vibraphone performances were made at a time when the actual recording technology wasn't really there, they all have this very thin quality that I think misses a lot of the great character of the instrument.

Detour - Bill Le Sage: Like compare this from 1971 to Wizard Of The Vibes from 1952, the sounds is miles warmer and gives so much more of the full range and detail of the instrument. I also listened to this song five times in a row when I first heard it, the central refrain is just so fuckin good. Like I said, big vibes vibe and who knows why.

Blowin' The Blues Away - Buddy Rich And His Sextet: Superhuman playing aside, it's unbelievable how good these drums sound. The whole first minute just feels like a tour of each specific drum and I absolutely revel in it. I feel like flute and vibes is a relatively rare combo so it's extremely nice to hear Sam Most and Mike Manieri go ham in tandem.

Yama Yama - Yamasuki Singers: A friend sent me this song that he's had stuck in his head for ten years ever since it was in a beer ad from the days when beer ads were incredible strange for complicated legal reasons about not showing people enjoying the product or something https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ORfkh0OojxY and this incredible song is apparently from a 1971 French concept album where a couple of guys wrote a bunch of psychedelic songs in Japanese for an unknown reason that later became a massive drum and bass breaks album, and one of the guys was Thomas Bangalter from Daft Punk's dad! Music is crazy.

Alfonso Muskedunder - Todd Terje: I'm starting a petition to get Todd Terje to write the soundtrack for the next Mario Kart. I absolutely love this song and this whole album because it's so joyful and strange and it just sounds like nothing else I've ever heard. He seem to truly operate in a world entirely of his own.

Pala - Roland Tings: I love this song. It's like he wrote it with normal sounds and then went back and replaced every instrument with the party version. This song hands you a coconut and says welcome to the island where bad vibes are punishable by firing squad.

Keygen 13 - Haze Edit - Dubmood: There's a fucking album of keygen music on spotify and it's absolutely great and so good that someone's doing the work to recognize the value of the music this extremely weird scene produced and preserve it. If you don't know, back in the day when you pirated photoshop or whatever, you would download a license key generator which was a program made by extreme nerds who had cracked the license key algorithm to give you a fake one, and for unknown reasons they would make the keygen program play original chiptune music that someone in their nerd crew would compose. Who knows why but god bless them.

My Moon My Man (Boys Noize Remix) - Feist: The very concept of a Boys Noize remix of My Moon My Man is hilarious and it turns out it sounds absolutely amazing as well. Two great tastes that taste great together.

Low Blows - Meg Mac: I had a big Meg Mac phase this month too, listened to her album a lot and it's extremely solid. Great timing too cause her new one comes out in a month or so too. I really am excited to hear her next album because she's so good but I've always got this feeling that she hasn't reached her full potential yet, she's only going to get a million times better in an album or two.

Patience - Tame Impala: I love that the cover of this single is a pic of congas because it feels like that's the central thesis here. Kevin Parker bought some congas and is making disco Tame Impala now and I really couldn't be happier about it.

Unconditional (feat. Kitten) - Touch Sensitive: I love a 90s throwback done with love. There's nothing cynical or ironic about this it's just fun as hell!

Last Hurrah - Bebe Rexha: Get a fucking load of this Bebe Rexha song that interpolates Buy U A Drank by T-Pain for the chorus! It's a testament to how good that song is that she's using the verse melody as the chorus. T-Pain will quite literally never get the respect he deserves. Also this song goes for 2.5 minutes. There's something happening where pop songwriting is getting more and more compact, completely trimming the fat and ornamentation and it's very interesting.

Hi Bich - Bad Bhabie: Also I'm fully six months late on Hi Bich but I'm of the opinion that it's extremely fucking good. A perfect little reaction gif of a song and it only goes for 1m45!

Friends - Flume: I'm doubling down on my thesis about emo rap from last month but this song literally sounds like a Flume remix of a Hawthorne Heights song. The whole melody of it, the overlapping yelled/clean vocals. The lyrics obviously. I don't know it's just very odd how close it is. A sort of emo trojan horse to trick people into thinking The Used are cool again. 

How To Build A Relationship (feat. JPEGMAFIA) - Flume: I've been meaning to check out JPEGMAFIA (AKA Buttermilk Jesus AKA DJ Half-Court Violation AKA Lil' World Cup) for a while but this is the song that convinced me. There's just so much to digest in this. Every line is gold and delivered with massive conviction even when he realises it's total nonsense like 'dont call me unless I gave you my number'.

Bells & Circles (feat. Iggy Pop) - Underworld: Underworld alive 2019?? I love this song becuase Iggy Pop has been riding a fine line between punk provocateur and old man yells at cloud for a while now and this song is the perfect mix of both. You can't hijack airplanes and redirect them to cuba anymore and as a result it's over for liberal democracies. Just yelling about air travel for six minutes and it's good.

Guns Blazing (Drums Of Death Pt. 1) - UNKLE: This beat is some of my favourite DJ Shadow work I think. The menacing organ bass throughout, and especially the distorted drum freakout near the end. It's just great all the way through.

Homo Deus IV - Deantoni Parks: Another Deantoni Parks track like I was raving about last month. This whole album is great and flows together as a single piece of work amazingly. I love the purposefully limited sample palette of each track forcing an evolving groove throughout. He absolutely wrings every bit of variation he can get out of every single sound he uses and once you get into the groove of it it's absolutely mind blowing.

Boredom - The Drones: I love that The Drones can write a song about joining ISIS that's also a lot of fun. Spelling out radicalization in a way anyone can understand and sympathise with and then switching it in the second verse to spell out how we got into this situation anyway. 

Loinclothing - Hunters And Collectors: I love how much this song sounds like a voodoo celebration in christian hell.

The Fun Machine Took A Shit And Died - Queens Of The Stone Age: There's a good bit on the live dvd they put out after Lullabies To Paralyze where they play this song and they say it was supposed to be on the album but somebody stole the master recordings from the studio, which is an incredible and brazen crime. Then when they put it out on Era Vulgaris as a bonus track Josh Homme said in an interview "The tapes got lost. Actually, they were just at another studio, but we falsely accused everyone in the world of theft" which is extremely funny. This is really one of their best songs and I sort of really with it had been on Lullabies because it fits perfectly between The Blood Is Love and Someone's In The Wolf type of vibes, I love how it just kind of keeps shifting ideas and riffs throughout. An absolute jam overflowing with ideas.

10AM Automatic - The Black Keys: This song is an all time great in my opinion. It's so straightforward and so effective. I wonder if we'll get a blues rock revival ever or if Jack White still being alive and bad is souring everyone on that idea. This song also has one of my favourite guitar sounds in history I think - the outrageously huge sounding solo that comes out of nowhere and swallows up the rest of the mix like a swirling black hole near the end.

Gamma Knife - King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard: I've never gotten much into King Gizzard and because of their one million albums already it's hard to know where to start but I've been listening to Nonagon Infinity a bit and it's great, it's just good old fashioned 70s prog jams front to back.

Gina Works At Hearts - DZ Deathrays: I absolutely love this song and I absolutely love the second guitar sound in the chorus of this song that sounds like it's made out of thin steel.

Black Brick - Deafheaven: When I saw Deafheaven the other month I was right up the front and it was a life changingly great experience AND they played this new song live for the first time before it went up everywhere like three hours later which was very exciting to be given a sclusie like that. After they finished a guy behind me whispered to his friend "Slayer..." which was very funny to me.

Gemini - Elder: I found this band because one of my Spotify Daily Mixes was all stoner metal for a while, which is a good genre to see all lined up because it'll have Weedeater, Bongripper AND Uncle Acid & The Deadbeats right there in a row for you. Anyway this album is extremely good, the very best kind of stoner metal where it's groovy and fun and has big meaty riffs and ripping big solos and it's extremely easy to listen to three times in a row.

The Paradise Gallows - Inter Arma: My big obsession the past little while has been Inter Arma ever since Stereogum posted The Atavist's Meridian from their new album. It is just so fucking good and I can't believe I've never heard of them before. You know when you find out about an amazing band and then you find out they've been around for nearly ten years and you can't believe everyone in your life has been selfishly hiding them from you?

The Atavist's Meridian - Inter Arma: I think a big part of my enjoyment of this band has also been that I discovered them at the same time as I'm listening to an audiobook of the complete Conan The Barbarian omnibus so I'm very much in the brain space for music that sounds like it would be nice to swing an axe to.

Untoward Evocation - Impetuous Ritual: I love how halfway through this kind of just turns into a big swirling mist of dark sounds. It feels so formless and dark that it could just shake apart and dissipate at any moment and you'd look down to realise your skin is gone.

Eagle On A Pole - Conor Oberst: from Genius: 'In an interview with MTV news, Oberst stated “We were on the bus one day and a friend of ours that travels with us and works for the band kind of came out from the back of the bus and said that first line: ‘Saw an eagle on a pole… I think it was an eagle.’ And then this guy Simon Joyner, who is a great songwriter from Omaha and one of my great friends, he was on tour with us and sitting there and he was like, ‘You know, that’s a great name for a song.’ We kind of had a contest where he wrote a song with that first line, and [then] I did, and a couple of our other friends. We kind of all played them for each other. Simon’s is better than mine, but it is a good line to start a song.” Another version–Mystic Valley Band drummer Jason Boesel’s interpretation–is on the next album, Outer South.' The idea that such a good song has such a braindead origin only makes me love it more.

Lake Marie - John Prine: When I saw John Prine the other month he played this song that I had never heard before and I had to look it up after and now I'm completely obsessed with it. It feels like falling asleep during a movie and missing a critical plot point so the rest doesn't make sense when you wake up but is thrilling nonetheless. Also he absolutely screamed "SHADOWS!!!" when he played it which was a fucking cool thing to see a 72 year old man do.

Little White Dove - Jenny Lewis: The drums on this whole album are absolutely huge for some reason and I love it. My favourite recent sound is in the first chorus where there's a funny little pitch correction noise as she sings 'dove'. It's very strange and very very good.

Locked Up - The Ocean Party: I only found out The Ocean Party existed as they announced their farewell show this month which is a real shame but I'm glad I got to hear of them at all because they're very good. A very good song about that feeling we all know and love: driving for a long long time.

Plain & Sane & Simple Melody - Ted Lucas: I found out about this song from Emma Ruth Rundle's Amoeba Records video and she makes a good point about this whole album sounding like something's gone wrong and it got accidentally pitched down slightly in the recording process. It's unclear if that's what happened or that's just how he sounds but it adds a very softly spooky undercurrent to a very nice song.​ 

listen here

#playlists

[earwaxinggibbous]

Top 10 Best Hit Songs of 2018

As I geared up to make the list of hits for 2018, I was prepared for difficulty, and I wasn’t wrong. Hence why there are a few little cheats here and there. Really anything that even had the potential to be a hit got on this list because the Hot 100 was fucking barren and I figure I’d rather give some exposure to some good artists that didn’t get what they deserved.

I do discuss alcohol/drug use briefly in my number 9 + 6 and abuse in my number 4. Let’s get this shit on the road.

10. Mine - Bazzi

This song is dumb. And I love it.

Mine by Bazzi, who no doubt will not show up on the charts next year, is a song that all of you know even if you think you don’t, because it’s the one with the memes.

You so! Fuckin! Precious! When you! Smiiiiile!

Yeah, it’s that one.

There’s not much to say about this one. It’s a quick and easy listen at only a little over 2 minutes. Bazzi has a nice enough voice, and the production manages to stand on its own. Honestly the reason it’s here is because the lyrics are adorable.

It feels very teenage, but not in the obnoxious way that Lucid Dreams is. It’s just very innocent despite the second line being about hitting it from the back. It’s a kind of innocence I can enjoy mostly unironically.

Like, whatever man. Just enjoy life.

9. Betrayed - Lil Xan

So I wasn’t actually sure when this song charted. I believe it was either late 2017 or early 2018, possibly with some crossover, but I’m counting it because I love this song so much.

Betrayed actually shares a lot of similarities with Juice WRLD’s Lucid Dreams. They were both towards the bottom on each respective list, they both have videos made by Cole Bennet, and they both have a sneaky anti-drug message.

Ironic considering his name is Lil Xan. Also I lied it’s not very sneaky at all. Which is good, if you’re gonna be anti-drug then just fucking do it. The beat is chill, the bars are chill, it’s all super chill. That’s probably in part due to the fact that Lil Xan has a super calming voice. This is weed music. Like Car Seat Headrest. And good weed music can be enjoyed when you’re sober, which Betrayed can be because it just sounds nice.

A good chunk of Betrayed is about the pitfalls of the rap game, and how suddenly everyone turns on you and wants your money, which is kind of neurotic but not entirely inaccurate.

This was actually the plot of a Jay-Z and Justin Timberlake song called Holy Grail from a few years back. And I hate to say it but this song does it way better, because it’s not trying to make fame out to be some horrible demon priestess who’s sucking your soul out of your ass, but rather, more of a lifestyle with very different complications.

Which is what it is.

So Jay-Z got outdone by a 12-year-old with face tats named Lil Xan, and if I heard about that my ego would be deeply, deeply bruised.

The only reason it isn’t higher is because, uh.

Oof, Lil Xan. Come on now.

8. King’s Dead - Jay Rock ft. Kendrick Lamar, Future and James Blake

So a lot of people actually didn’t like this song. Which... I kind of get.

Also apparently this was on the Black Panther soundtrack. I never saw that movie, but a lot of the lyrics on this, at least according to lyric genius, relate to that movie. Which I guess is why I have no clue what it’s about other than the average rap music cliches. The only thing I knew about King’s Dead for god knows how long was this gif of Kendrick eating corn in a palm tree.

I feel like the best argument against this song (other than Future’s high-pitched sampling of Slob On My Knob that made me lose my shit) is that there’s nothing really special about it. I mean yeah, Kendrick has a voice that’s smooth like butter, but King’s Dead has a generic beat and bars that just don’t stand out.

But I don’t know. I just love it.

This is just a nice fun song to chill out to. I can put it on, throw myself into bed, and let the cares of the day shloff off of my body as Kendrick whispers to me in the language of the ancient ones. This is nowhere near his best work, not even remotely close to it. All it is is nice and small and easy to listen to without being completely boring.

Maybe I also just like it because it’s been forever since a rap song really sounded like one. This is partially the fault of Future, who is on this song, and doing the same shit he usually does, but at least the rest of the song sounds like words. It feels like it’s been a whole decade since rap music wasn’t just an autotuned jumble, and while I’m easier on mumble-rap than most, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t miss good old fashioned regular rap.

Regardless of whether it’s blind nostalgia or some level of actual quality, I enjoy King’s Dead for what it is. It may just be a rock and not a diamond, but it’s my rock and I love it.

7. In My Blood - Shawn Mendes

So like, what the fuck happened with Shawn Mendes? He just kind of got really good all of a sudden. Like when every genre, every artist, every newcomer and every single is shitting the bed, it’s Shawn Mendes of all people to bring it home. That’s like if Charlie Puth turned out to be the savior of music. It’s like if Chingy developed into a rap legend. And this song, In My Blood, is about something we all wanna do! Giving up.

Okay, so that’s not exactly what it’s about. It’s about the feeling of wanting to give up, but refusing to, in a very chronological way. With the verses representing the low points and the chorus representing the swell of energy that forces one to get back on their feet. It’s an incredibly well put-together song where Shawn’s voice is actually put to good use instead of him gargling pus like he did on Treat You Better. I’d be lying if I said he didn’t emote wonderfully on this.

I haven’t heard any of the other singles he’s released around this song, but I’m definitely interested in doing so because In My Blood is an experience, kind of in the same way that like, a really good Panic! at the Disco song is. It just punches you repeatedly. You ever been punched by a song? It feels great. I wish more songs would punch me.

In a lot of ways In My Blood is also nostalgic for me, since it brings me back to an era where I actually got excited about pop music because it was important to me some-fucking-how. And I don’t mean like, I was interested in pop like I am right now. When I was littler my parents basically raised me on old alternative music and jazz, and while I definitely enjoyed it I had literally no idea what other kids at school listened to. The first pop song I remember hearing was Pokerface by Lady GaGa, I was on the school bus, and it sounded like nothing I’d ever heard before. Over time my sister began playing the radio so that her friends at her new school would stop goofing on her for not knowing any pop artists, and hearing all this new music was kind of an experience. Of course after awhile we both moved into individualized tastes and neither of us really listen to the radio unless it’s during the holidays, but hearing In My Blood somehow reminds me of a time when being a hit actually meant something.

It’s a song where you put it on and it just owns the room despite its minimalism, and with tons of easy listening alt-crap hitting the stations nowadays, it’s nice, albeit surreal, to know that Shawn Mendes is the one who gives a shit.

6. Genius - LSD

In case you didn’t know, LSD is the combined efforts of rapper Labrinth, singer Sia and producer Diplo. I hadn’t actually heard of this group until pretty recently, and I wish I had because if you know me, you know about my wretched obsession with Sia. Maybe I’m too forgiving, but I can’t remember a single bad track she’s put out. And Genius is no exception.

Lyrically this song’s a bit lacking, despite the title. But soundwise it sticks like gum, with a layered production. I always say that they should have Sia work with one of these sing-rappers, so having it finally happen is proof that god might be listening to me.

It’s like bubblegum for your brain, it’s sweet, it tastes good, it’s fun and it sticks. Even after only one listen I couldn’t get the tune out of my head. And god knows I just want the charts to be fun for once. No, I don’t think this song charted, which is an absolute shame. LSD should absolutely have the star power to hit the top 100, but I guess this just wasn’t a good year for them.

Regardless, I have heard that LSD plans to do a full project, and after listening to the rest of their short album I am more than excited. The only reason this isn’t higher up is that, judging by the group name I was expecting it to be way more of an acid trip soundwise. It’s definitely hard to compare LSD’s Genius to any other type of pop in recent years, but I feel like that’s moreso because Diplo and company have taken all sorts of elements from all sorts of pop music and sneakily fused them together.

Regardless, Genius is a highly enjoyable listen. Sia’s at top performance as per usual, Labrinth sounds really nice beside her and Diplo’s production is solid. Also I seriously recommend the music video. It’s super weird. I wish animated music videos were more common with pop, to be honest.

5. Better Now - Post Malone

I almost feel like I’ve sinned putting a Post Malone song above a Kendrick Lamar song, but god do I love Better Now.

The Post Malone conversation is still very much underway, with a lot of people saying they hated Psycho because it was boring (which I can get even though I don’t agree) and that they hated Jackie Chan because it was just really really stupid. But, much like Candy Paint, I have yet to hear anyone say they dislike Better Now. And I do honestly believe that he hit it out of the park on this one.

This one’s sort of the reverse of Genius. It has pretty basic trap production, but really nice lyrics. Possibly building on the story from I Fall Apart, though with a slightly more mature outlook, Post talks about an ex-girlfriend who he misses, trying to drown his feelings in alcohol, drugs and expensive stuff in the wake of the relationship.

A total bummer, but Post sells it pretty well.

Like damn. That’s a detail right there.

I mean, I could argue that nobody has a specific drawer for socks they don’t like, but who cares really.

Anyway, unlike I Fall Apart, which was a turn-off for a lot of people because it felt spiteful and juvenile, Better Now doesn’t really place the blame on Post or his ex, which is a much more realistic scenario. Because really, his ex isn’t at fault for no longer being in love with him, but Post isn’t at fault for pining. He’s only human. Judging by the lyrics, the story is that Post was dumped for being a druggie in this song.

Though Lyric Genius also argues this is a reference to the death of Lil Peep, who was close personal friends with Post Malone in real life. If this song is somehow in a weird roundabout way an ode to Lil Peep, honestly it does feel like it’s a good send-up to him from another rapper. Like yeah, a love song might seem weird as a tribute to a dead friend, but it definitely does feel like a mournful, sad song about longing for a close person who’s gone for the long run.

Whether this is a tribute to Lil Peep or just a breakup song, it definitely carries the weight of the emotions, partly since Post just generally sounds sad all the time. And in a year full of pissy break-up songs, this is the one that hits home more than any other for me. If Post is going off of past experience, it shows, and if he isn’t he’s just a really good actor I guess.

4. Freaky Friday - Lil Dicky ft. Chris Brown

This song is the bane of my fucking existence.

Why do I laugh at this? Why do I laugh at jokes about Lil Dicky having a small penis still? Why am I losing my shit at the idea that a white guy in a black guy’s body would immediately wonder if he can say the n-word? Why am I, a grown man with presumably mature tastes, going ‘hee hee hoo hoo’ over the phrase “I’m DJ Khaled! Why am I yelling?” And why the fuck, in the year 2018, am I actively enjoying a Chris Brown song?

Lil Dicky I have a soft spot for. We’re both Jews, we’re both stupid, we both look dead inside in every photograph taken of us. We’re basically like long lost twin brothers. Plus I do think he’s a skilled rapper, with his greatest track easily being Professional Rapper featuring Snoop Dogg, and if it had been my choice, that song would’ve been his first big hit. But no, it had to be Freaky Friday. A song that, for all accounts and purposes, is about as funny as an early Your Favorite Martian song, and yet still makes me roll into a screaming fit laughing my ass off.

I’m not gonna sit here and pretend I’m over the Chris Brown drama just because there’s plenty of worse artists charting right now. Forgetting it would be an offense to everyone involved. Do I think he’s probably matured since? Maybe. But that doesn’t excuse or explain away what he did. But for me to pretend I don’t enjoy this song would be disingenuous, and it breaks my heart to actually enjoy a Chris Brown song. In 20-fucking-18.

Everyone hates this song. And they’re valid, honestly. I just like the chorus, maybe? I don’t know. It’s hardly Lil Dicky’s best work, but fuck me. Of course I had to be the one suffering with the curse of enjoying Lil Dicky’s Freaky Friday to the point that I put it above a ton of songs that are probably objectively better, all because I laugh at dick jokes and love a catchy chorus.

But I will give it credit, this is the first popular comedy song in a long time I’ve been able to get down to. Selfie and What Does The Fox Say made me wanna scoop my eyes out with a melon baller, but of course the fucking Chris Brown comedy song makes me shriek in body-wracking laughter as if I’ve never heard a joke before.

It’s been at LEAST a year since I felt this shitty for enjoying a song, but that’s life I guess. Just enjoying bad music by bad people for bad reasons.

3. High Hopes - Panic! at the Disco

How is it that we’re having a Panic! at the Disco hit in 2018? Whatever, I’m not mad.

I mean, come on. A swelling Brendon Urie anthem about finally being able to achieve your dreams and shit? That’s really all I need on a bad day, isn’t it. Thanks 2018.

I don’t even remember if this song has good production or not. It’s really loud. Everything is loud. Do you think I care if it sounds good? I mean, Brendon sounds good, but like. Biz Markie’s Just A Friend fills me with emotion and it sounds like it’s being sung by a donkey. My standards are not high. Maybe I’d need higher standards to not like this song.

Frankly, I don’t care if the production is bad. Because this song is just good mood music, and I like that it’s loud. I want Brendon to scream in my ear about having high hopes. Do you think I care how it sounds?

No but really. It’s a perfectly well-built song, Brendon performs well on it. Bless this shit though. If there’s anything that represents hope in my mind, it’s Brendon Urie skittering up the side of a building while singing about having high hopes and his mama and whatever whatever. In a year full of dour break-up songs and people dying and abusers getting famous, all you can really have is high hopes. And that’s all there is to it.

2. Neva Lavd Yah! - Dusty Ray Bottoms

Can we all agree RuPaul’s Drag Race is kind of a hack show at this point? I mean, Season 10 was a disaster and so far AS4 has been a disaster too. I’m not even sure why I still watch it at this point.

Anyway, this is kind of a cheat. Neva Lavd Yah! charted on Billboard LGBT, and actually charted pretty high. Not the actual Hot 100, but do you think I care anymore?

So we’re all mad that rock music is dead, and that the only remnants we have of it is Imagine Dragons and other similar garbage. But don’t fret (unless it’s on a guitar) because Dusty Ray Bottoms, queen of my heart, is here to solve that problem. Full electric guitar and drums. No autotune. Just pure Dusty Ray on the track here to kick ass.

I guess Neva Lavd Yah! is a generic “fuck the haters” anthem, but for once I actually believe it. Maybe it’s because it’s being sung by a 50-foot-tall gay man with dots all over his face. Maybe it’s just because, with every drag queen doing techno music, Dusty Ray has done something completely different. God knows I was sick of every drag queen doing overproduced electronica about nothing at all.

Neva Lavd Yah! isn’t polished or clean. It’s screaming and loud and full of passion. Sometimes you’re just a 50-foot gay who wants to yell, sometimes you’re a 5-foot gay who wants to yell. Maybe you don’t feel like yelling right now, but you’ve probably been in that mood before. Neva Lavd Yah! is for when you wanna chill in a garage with an electric guitar and write songs and then scream with your shitty garage band and it’s the 90′s and you’re gay.

Damn right.

And before we move forward,

let’s hit those honorable mentions.

I Like It - Cardi B ft. Bad Bunny and J Balvin

This song really did almost get on the list, and I mean it was like a baby dick’s length away. I almost feel bad that I let Mine on instead. Cardi I am so sorry.

Nice For What - Drake

This was the only good song Drake released this year, and while Drake talking about “strong women” on the same album as I’m Upset seems like bullshit, I’d be lying if I said this wasn’t at least kind of a banger.

Now or Never - Blair St. Clair

This was the only other big drag queen hit I remember this year. It was released in the wake of Blair St. Clair coming out about a sexual assault, and while I do think it’s an empowering song, I don’t like the way it sounds that much.

Pray For Me - The Weeknd ft. Kendrick Lamar

How I liked King’s Dead more than this I can’t even explain to you. The beat on Pray For Me rocks my tight ass though. Plus let’s be honest, The Weeknd and Kendrick are a fucking dream team.

I Love It - Kanye West ft. Lil Pump

I can’t hate this. Fucking look at it. They’re in roblox costumes!

Famous Prophets (Stars) - Car Seat Headrest

Not a hit, which is the only thing that kept it off of here. Consider Song of the Summer by Remo Drive, Humanity by Gorillaz and When You Die by MGMT also in this spot.

On to number one, and if you know me you probably know it already.

1. Kamikaze - Eminem

Listen. I don’t care if this didn’t chart. I don’t care if it didn’t get close. I don’t give two fifths of a fuck if Eminem isn’t as good as he used to be. I don’t give a single rat’s ass.

Because I fucking love Kamikaze.

(The song.)

The album was fine, I wasn’t huge on the whole “call out everyone” angle it took. Sure sometimes it landed, but other times, like with the Tyler the Creator diss, it was completely pointless and kind of petty.

But the title song? It bangs.

The lyrics are good, obviously, it’s an Eminem song and he hasn’t been struggling with lyrics since... Revival I guess. The production on Kamikaze is interesting, the chorus is catchy. I just love it. It puts me in a good mood for reasons I cannot explain using words of the English language.

Maybe I just love Eminem too much. But in a year of stolid depression like 2018, all I wanted was for my favorite rapper Eminem to say “fuck” and yell a lot and just be kind of motivational in his weird way. And he did it. And I understand if people don’t enjoy Kamikaze (the song or the album) but I just can’t not love it, it makes me so excited every time I hear that intro. I feel like a child almost.

I saw Eminem live for the first time this year at Governor’s Ball. It was an experience. My feet were killing me because to get good spots, my sister and I had to sit through Chvrches. (Didn’t like them very much.) It was loud and crowded. It started raining, I was cold as shit and tired and this enormous drunk guy in a wifebeater nearly elbowed my head clean off of my shoulders just due to a lack of spacial awareness. And I didn’t even give a shit until it was over.

The music ended, and I realized I was freezing my ass off. And that’s what good music does to a guy I guess. And being able to download a new, really good Eminem song was like capturing that moment in a bottle. A bottle of white boy spite, but a good bottle nonetheless.

Of course I’m biased. God knows if this song is actually better than something like In My Blood or Genius, but I love this song too much to put it any lower than number one.

Whenever I need motivation or I’m just really pissed, this song is here for me to listen to, so I can lose my shit by the side of a man who I’ve literally begun referring to as my dad at this point. And that’s just what I want. A song that I can feel next to. A song that can feel with me. And as good as some of these other songs are, I don’t feel with them like I do with Kamikaze.

See you next year, I guess.

#top 10 #top 10 list #top 10 best hits of 2018 #year end countdown #panda posts #positive review #pop song review

[omnomwithrob]

Ba-da-bing.

On June 6th, 2009, ol’ Rob asked me to be his girlfriend. It was not the first time he asked, but it was the first time I said yes. Ten years, five states, one marriage, and one baby later, we went out to celebrate.

We decided on Parachute, a Michelin-starred Korean-American restaurant in humble Avondale. We started with their famous bing bread, and try as I might, I really don’t think I can describe it better than Parachute does: “Essentially it's stuffed bread that’s fried, baked, and brushed in bacon fat. It has a crispy exterior you can rap your knuckles against and hear/feel that fried crust. The bread pulls apart into fluffiness. It is filled with gooey melted white cheddar, savory scallions, tender potatoes, studded with the finest Kentucky bacon, and slathered with whipped sour cream butter. The dish is Chinese by way of Korea with a detour through the American Midwest. It's our best-selling menu item by a wide margin.”

It was satisfying in a way that’s reminiscent of a baked potato - it was actually the bread version of a cross between a baked potato and a scallion pancake, now that I think of it. It was a very nice accompaniment to our other starter, beef tartare. I loved that the cuts of beef were identical to the cuts of minced onions mixed within, but it was not an especially flavorful tartare. The ramp powder theoretically should have helped, but that somehow tasted like nothing.

My favorite bite of our entire meal is woefully out of focus in the next photo - among the banchan that accompanied our dinner were these spicy, smoky, and sour grilled mushrooms. So unique, so full of flavor, so addictive. The other banchan were okay - the pickled red cabbage was pretty straightforward, and the asparagus with gochujang was curiously nutty.

We also ordered the gem lettuce with ginger dressing and puffed brown rice, which to me sounded refreshing and reminiscent of a cooling ginger-dressed salad at a sushi restaurant. It was definitely accomplished that familiar feeling but was actually a little clunky for me - I didn’t love the huge pieces of lettuce, and they did not hold back on the ginger.

The next dish was one unlike we’d ever seen before - it was pork belly sashimi with sesame leaves. This one was hard to eat with your eyes unless you got a different angle :)

The pork belly was very mild, and I liked the sweet sauce it was served with, which was a nice complement to the salty pork. I especially loved it dipped in the vinegar from the pickled cabbage on the table for extra moisture and acidity. Moisture was definitely welcome, since I thought the sesame leaves were a little dry and a lent a medicinal flavor, milder than eucalyptus but similar in some ways.

One of our favorite Korean meals from our Sujeo days is ddeukboki, a saucy rice-cake dish with all kinds of satisfying textures. The version Parachute was serving at the time was very unique compared to some of the more traditional versions I’ve had and actually reminded reminded me a bit of an Italian bolognese.

Rob and I upped the funk factor and ordered maeuntang, which was described to us as “stinky fish soup” with cod, clams, and hatch chilis. It looked fairly innocuous (and leafy), but true to its name, it stunk to high heaven.

But it was FABULOUS. It’s hard to describe - savory, well-seasoned, with a broth that was really just satisfying. The clams were a little mealy, but the larger cod pieces were very delicious and tender; it helps that cod is mild enough to take on the deep flavors of the broth. It didn’t look so appetizing as we made our way through it, but I kept going back for more.

For dessert, we ordered a dark chocolate mousse that was made with a smoked tea and was topped with cherries and candied hazelnuts. I am not a huge nuts-in-chocolate person, so I could have done without the hazelnuts, but I could see why they were there. It was such an interesting dessert with the subtly smoky chocolate, and the nuttiness did play well with that, and the flavors were further complemented by the juicy, sweet, and sour cherries. Like much of the menu, I thought this was a very clever little dessert.

After this indulgent dinner, we took advantage of having a little more time booked with our babysitter and hopped down to Billy Sunday for a nightcap. I know this isn’t Drinking with Rob, but look at these beautiful cocktails! Rob had a daiquiri made with vintage rum; I had a minty little concoction made with Vandermint, a chocolatey, minty liqueur that I don’t even think you can buy anymore.

When we first moved to Chicago and to Logan Square in particular, Rob was VERY into Billy Sunday and their use of vintage spirits in their cocktails. But given that we were dirt poor and living on my postdoc salary when we first moved to town and then had a baby the next year, Rob has only actually been there once or twice. So when I watched him ogling an old bottle of Aperol that the bartender was showing him, I figured one more wouldn’t hurt.

We had a wonderful experiences at these neighborhood treasures and are so grateful to have had the opportunity to splurge on them as we celebrated ten years together. The stinky fish, pickled mushrooms, and aged spirits were a timely reminder of how much better things get with time.

Caroline

P.S. Parachute is temporarily closed right now, but it looks like they’re planning to reopen in September; Billy Sunday seems to have recently reopened, and we wish them both safety and continued good business.

#Rob Bratney #food blog #Chicago #Illinois #Avondale #Logan Square #Parachute #Korean-American food #Michelin star #bing bread #Billy Sunday #vintage spirits #Aperol #Vandermint #anniversary

[kakivino]

Great Wines of Italy 2018 Bangkok

Another December, another round of wine scrum. There I was, again, negotiating a capacity crowd of stemware-wielding, purplish teeth-baring oenophiles for my vinous spoils.

To be exact, a staggering 191 premium wines from 98 producers. James Suckling’s Great Wines of Italy 2018 Asia tour was back and bigger than ever.

The bustle of Bangkok was nothing compared with frantic scenes in Hong Kong or Beijing, observed visiting winemakers. That said, no sooner had the door opened things got into full swing.

More wines, less time

Something tells us perhaps the shortened programme — there goes our one-hour head start before people clock out from work — has something to do with cost management. Omission of some big-name labels suggests as much. Then again, it remained a small price to pay for the admission price we paid, in a country where wine spells luxury.

But I digressed. Naturally, the early birds flocked to wherever 100-pointer juice flowed, drained and vanished in record time, leaving a trail of empty Ornellaias or Tignanellos exhibited posthumously to disgruntled latecomers.

However, the sheer number of exciting picks meant there was no time for regret. Something else would come along.

Suffice to say, I was extremely content to have followed the heart rather than the points. Though I barely scratched the surface, my experience was all the more rewarding for when winemakers reciprocated aficionados’ enthusiasm with full attention and spirited exchanges in between pours.

Here’s my far-from-exhaustive fabulous dozen from the walk-around tasting:

Riecine ’14 Toscana Rosso Riecine Visibly limpid, hauntingly weightless. Beautiful mesh of red fruit, violet, white pepper and blood orange, laced with racy acidity and minerality. Smart, trim, nothing in excess. Picture a whispery tête-à-tête with Rooney Mara. Incredibly cerebral, soulful sangiovese in purezza. Some whole bunch, extended skin maceration, élevage in concrete.

Riecine ’15 Toscana Rosso La Gioia More quintessential Chianti Classico: richer, fuller by comparison. Expressive sour cherry and red fruit emerges front and centre, as sweet spice, sandalwood and leather chime in harmoniously. Judicious oak and supple tannins add substance to style with plenty of verve. A classy 100% sangiovese which lives up to its name: true joy in a glass.

The reason these translucent beauties shun the Gran Selezione pedestal, according to the engaging winemaker Alessandro Campatelli, is colour-obsessed red tape no less. To think that the Consorzio would’ve learned a thing or two from past blunders...

Pieropan ’15 Soave Classico Calvarino Heady aromas of pear, apple, grapefruit and spring flowers wow the senses with real piquancy and thrust. Dripping with pristine orchard fruit, chalky minerals and brisk acidity on the sapid palate. Leesy and complex, it closes long with a peculiarly saline, nutty twang. Decidedly scintillating. 70% garganega and 30% trebbiano di soave on volcanic soil, aged sur lie in concrete vats.

Pieropan ’15 Soave Classico La Rocca Harvested late and oaked, this radiant white bears richer concentration and definition, with a tropical (papaya!) twist. Honeyed and minerally, bright acidity lifts the tactile palate as it powers to a flavoursome finish. A peach of a wine, this offers fascinating contrast side by side with Calvarino yet there’s very little to separate them. 100% garganega on chalky clay, aged sur lie in large old casks.

Pietradolce ’14 Etna Rosso Vigna Barbagalli Lady Etna is enigmatic: floral, briary, smoky, with tar and menthol in the bouquet. Concentrated wild berry and slick oak inform the smoldering, youthfully austere palate. Distinctively earthy with pu’er-like finish. Mind the silken yet potent tannins. Has the stuffing, both gravitas and grace not unlike nebbiolo. From century-old, pre-phylloxera vines at contrada Rampante.

Alta Mora ’14 Etna Rosso Guardiola Likewise earthy disposition to this fragrant single contrada. Mineral vein underscores dark fruit, wet clay, tar, florals, pomegranate and Mediterranean herb, all framed by dense noble tannins. Tightly-knit and sleek rather than sinewy, with excellent complexity, line and length. More animated and savoury than Barbagalli. Nebbiolo again pops into mind yet with a personality all its own. A winner from 150-year old vines.

Nittardi ’15 Chianti Classico Casanuova di Nittardi Pure sangiovese from acidity-retaining altitudes at Castellina. Just old tonneaux and some time in concrete. Bright cherry is joined by violet, dark berries and a whiff of good ol’ barnyard. Sappy palate grips and extends with a dusty, spicy kick. Riveting. One-time owner, Renaissance rockstar Michelangelo Buonarroti — hence the artsy label tribute — makes for an excellent conversation piece.

Proprietor Léon Femfert revealed that Rhys, one half of the mischievous Matthews on The Wine Show — and an Emmy-winning actor — downed a glass filled to the brim, presumably in desperate need of inspiration for his label doodling showdown with co-host Goode. Guess what, it did the trick.

Castello di Volpaia ’15 Chianti Classico Gran Selezione Coltassala Red fruit, incense, florals and vanilla leap out of the glass. The extravagant perfume a result of sandy soil at Radda altitudes and 24-month worth of new French oak. Deep sweet cherry luxuriates in milk chocolate in the mouth, rendered a voluptuous spin by said wood. Fresh acidity and firm ripe tannins provide impeccable balance. Freshly-minted Gran Selezione, kind of self-explanatory if you find it a touch modern.

San Polino ’13 Brunello di Montalcino Helichrysum Spellbinding aromatics. Ample acidity and a wall of mouth-coating tannins shape the chiseled architecture which frames black cherry, raspberry, blue flowers, new leather, tobacco and baking spice. Brooding and tight, there is no doubting the latent potential i.e. depth, intensity and vigour. Long ferment, large Slavonian cask aging equal classic brunello par excellence.

It was the Fanti rep Luca Vitiello who pointed me in San Polino direction when I requested his recommendation. Nice lad. Speaking of which, his lithe, fresh-fruited Fanti ’13 Brunello di Montalcino is disarmingly charming, delivering succulent berries and watermelon with lip-smacking immediacy, not that it won’t benefit from some bottle age.

Argentiera ’15 Bolgheri Superiore Ornellaia next-table might have stolen the limelight, but this snazzy overachiever stole the show. Blueberry, blackcurrant, cedar, wood spice and graphite meld seamlesssly with super polished tannins and opulent oak to compose a symphony of decadence. Apparently well-endowed yet supple in its caress. The proverbial iron fist in a velvet glove.

Jermann ’16 Vintage Tunina Venezia Giulia An intriguing blend of chardonnay, sauvignon with autochthonous ribolla gialla, malvasia istriana and picolit. Intense nose and full-bodied palate are handsomely laden with gooseberry, apricot, white blossom and lemon drop in citrusy overtone. Steely acidity balances juicy weight with aplomb, as pithy aftertaste lingers on. Not for nothing does it consistently rank as one of Italy’s top whites.

A winemakers’ vintage

To say barolo is conspicuous by its absence would be an understatement. With 2014s’ bad rap weighing on my mind, this wettest of vintages in recent memory seemed to have put a damper on barolo’s hot streak at first taste. A weaker field and palate fatigue arguably didn’t help.

But hindsight is a beautiful thing, in all probability, so could be some of these ugly ducklings. What this winemakers’ vintage might lack in flesh and bones, it more than makes up for in finesse and sultry appeal, eager to please with minimal cellaring. 2014 might turn out to be nothing more than just a speed bump.

Between the inebriation and camaraderie, the wine-drenched evening was a lot to take in. Evidently, Bangkok embraced vino italiano with gusto — some had one too many, those jovial strangers who egged me on to give the irrepressible Frescobaldi ambassador, Erika Ribaldi a peck on the cheek, to which I respectfully obliged.

Good-natured fun apart, the tasting is always about finding that something which tickles your fancy. I’m constantly told, and often repeat, that to get to the bottom of Italian wines, non basta una vita. — KY

*** This is a sponsored post *** The sixth Asia’s largest Italian wine showcase will return to Grand Hyatt Erawan Hotel on Nov 27. Visit jamessuckling.com/event for tickets or more info. James Suckling is one of the world’s foremost wine critics, having tasted more than 200,000 wines over three decades. A resident of Hong Kong, he lives most of the time on Cathay Pacific flying to the most popular wine regions in the world and tasting the best wines. James organises regularly large premium wine events in Hong Kong, Thailand, the US and Europe. Visit them at jamessuckling.com.

#wine #wine event #wine tasting #great wines of italy #bangkok #james suckling #italian wine

[r3dman3-blog]

Regretfully, this is one album that I didn’t put on for the first time until the other day, although it came out in early March of this year. 

J.I.D’s The Never Story was released on J. Cole’s record label Dreamville, as well as Interscope and Spillage Village. The hip hop don took notice of J.I.D during the up-and-coming rapper’s 2014 tour, and is even credited for producing two tracks on this record.

This album is nice and short. It starts off with a brief gospel-inspired track, “Doo Wop”, in which J.I.D’s sung vocals are beautifully and intricately arranged.

Immediately afterwards, we have “General”, a bluesy, moody track which serves fantastic introduction to J.I.D as a person. His references give us a peak into his interests, and he recounts a lot of his past experiences leading up to the release of this album. It’s a great attention-grabber.

Then we have the lead single, “Never”. It’s really a two part song, but this cut features J.I.D reminiscing on his past a little more and asserting himself as an artist. He’s got some really clever lines, like “You know I came from the dirt like a sandstorm”. Also, both parts of this song are total bangers.

I really enjoy J.I.D’s lyricism and delivery. The song “D/vision (feat. EARTHGANG)” contains both colorful descriptions and memorable vocal rhythms. It also starts off with J.I.D’s very warped, slowed down vocals and it’s very entertaining. There’s more creative vocal work on “Underwear” with it’s pretty goofy chorus, but I think that a few more “regular” choruses would’ve been nice because I find the joke getting old by the end of the song. Also, the song “Somebody” is very joyful and positive. It reminds of Acid Rap era Chance.

The album finishes off with “LAUDER”, the second J-Cole-produced track, and J.I.D basically spills his guts on this song. Many things he’s alluded to previously in the album, but everything is wrapped up very neatly here. 

Considering that J.I.D demonstrates some serious singing skills on the first song, I do wish he showcased that talent more. “All Bad (feat. Mereba)” is actually a very pretty tune, and he also sings on “8701 (feat. 6LACK)” but I can’t help but feel ultimately underwhelmed because nothing can match or top the grandeur of “Doo Wop”. However, I wouldn’t be surprised if J.I.D is hesitant to sing because he is already compared to Anderson .Paak quite often, despite having a much different musical style (in my opinion).

Overall, I really enjoy this album. J.I.D is a fresh voice with a unique delivery and I think he really nailed the overall presentation of his big debut. It’s a quick listen, but J.I.D introduces himself really well. Also, the production is well varied with a healthy balance of trap bangers and comfortable, head-bobbing tunes.

#j.i.d #the never story #j cole #interscope #dreamville records #spillage village #2017 #hip hop #rap #review #music #album review #southern hip hop #trap rap

[vandykecarolpdrf7]

Coconut Oil is One of the Healthiest Plant-Based Sources of Dietary Fat

Coconut oil has been unfairly vilified due to its saturated fat content, although this is fallacious on multiple accounts. The fats in coconut oil don’t really behave like saturated fats (SFAs), and even if they did, the evidence against saturated fats is mixed.

Coconut Oil Fatty Acids Are Unlike Other Fatty Acids

This has less to do with the fact that they’re mostly saturated and more to do with their markedly shorter chain length. Most dietary fats (LCFAs) are 16 to 18 carbons long whereas coconut oil fatty acids, collectively referred to as ‘medium-chain fatty acids’ (MCFAs), are 8 to 14.

Most nutrients are absorbed into the portal vein and then liver. LCFAs are different. The “why” is hotly debated — some people believe this is to spare LCFAs from tissues that don’t use them very much (eg, liver) for tissues that rely on them more (eg, heart) — but not the “how.” LCFAs are absorbed into the lymphatic system, bypassing liver, and entering the periphery directly.

Medium-chain fatty acids behave differently from other saturated fats. MCFAs, like those in coconut oil, are absorbed like most other nutrients — into the portal vein and then liver. They’re not efficiently stored as triacylglycerols or used for any other major purpose so instead of just floating around doing nothing or getting in the way, they’re partially oxidized into ketones. They’re not highly fully oxidized because liver is oxidizing other fuels and simply doesn’t need the energy.

Saturated Fat Per Se

As detailed above, MCFAs behave very differently from LCFAs (regardless of saturation status), and as such shouldn’t be directly compared to them or vilified because of their saturation.

That said, I remain skeptical on the vast claims against saturated fats per se. Most of the evidence is observational, meaning complicated statistical models are required in attempt to control for every possible confounding variable, which is nearly impossible, so in effect they basically just control for the obvious confounding variables and this is assumed to be ‘good enough.’ From a logical or scientific philosophy perspective, it’s not. Randomized controlled intervention trials are the sort we should be relying on for more accurate nutritional guidance.

Also, remember, coconut oil fatty acids (MCFAs) are saturated but much shorter than most dietary SFAs. Further, the most common source of dietary SFAs are junk foods like pizza and doughnuts… no wonder they get a bad rap!

However, when studied under more rigorous conditions, some studies show saturated fats aren’t so bad after all. Remember, these SFAs are not the same SFAs like those found in coconut oil, I’m just making the case against coconut oil being poison because of their saturated fatty acid content.

For example, one study showed replacing SFAs (eg, dairy) with monounsaturated fats (eg, canola oil) or polyunsaturated fats (eg, safflower or sunflower oil), HDL declined (1). In another study, increasing dietary SFAs were shown to modestly increase HDL (2). Lastly, a coconut oil-rich diet increased HDL in patients with coronary artery disease (3) (reminder, these were mainly MCFAs, not long-chain SFAs).

Coconut Oil and Cognition

It is thought that one reason cognition declines in dementia is due to reduced ability of brain to utilize glucose. As the brain is not dependent on insulin for glucose uptake, there is no clear fix on this aspect of fuel provisions.

However, brain will just as easily use ketones if they’re there (4). That is, glucose is considered to be the primary fuel of the brain because in most people, glucose is present in the bloodstream at much higher concentrations than ketones. Ramping up ketones either via a ketogenic diet or coconut oil or both, can compensate for the reduced glucose uptake and fill the energy void (5), although this may not be the only way ketones help. For example, one study showed a protective effect of ketones on neurons directly (6).

In one study on patients with Alzheimer’s disease, two-20 mL doses of coconut oil per day for 21 days significantly improved cognitive function (7). In another study of similar duration, a coconut oil-rich Mediterranean diet improved various measures of cognition (8). These are not isolated findings (9). A similar effect has been observed for isolated MCFAs (10) and ketones given directly (11). And elevated ketone levels have shown beneficial effects in a variety of animal models of Alzheimer’s disease (12).

Other Effects of Coconut Oil

Some of the other effects that have been observed:

Coconut oil may help induce satiety. One study showed higher satiety and lower food intake at a subsequent meal after an MCFA pre-load compared to LCFAs (13) which may have been due to a direct effect on hunger-modulating hormones (14).

Coconut oil may help you burn more calories. Coconut oil can also provide a modest boost to total energy expenditure (15).

Anti-stress and antioxidant effects have been shown in mice (16).

Take Home Message

Coconut oil fatty acids are saturated fatty acids.

There are two (and potentially three) separate problems with the claim that coconut oil is ‘pure poison’ because it is virtually entirely saturated fat:

• it assumes dietary saturated fat is poison;

• it assumes coconut oil fatty acids (MCFAs) behave like more common longer-chain fatty acids (saturated or otherwise); and

• most common sources of dietary saturated fats are pizza and doughnuts.

Evidence to date suggests coconut oil may have beneficial effects on cognition and saturated fats clearly aren’t ‘pure poison.’

http://bit.ly/2RxkjUh

#Coconut Oil is One of the Healthiest Plant-Based Sources of Dietary Fat

[onlyjihoons]

dream knight; l.j.n

a/n omg guys,, it has been so so long since i have written something, and im so sorry omg,, my school term is getting more hectic than it was before, and also i would like to sincerely apologise to  akutagawahakuryuunosuke im so sorry for taking so long to complete your request bb im almost done and i hope its not too shitty asnsosfo

and also this is a spinoff from @cremethorns Hydrochloric Acid,(i hope you don’t mind!) except it doesnt involve spillage of liquid on jeno and a shirtless jeno bc pg13, also highly based on true events that might have costed my innocence, i couldve caused an acid spill on my classmate lol.

disclaimer: this fic has nothing to do with royalty. or knights.

genre: in the context of The Inheritors,, fluff

synopsis: your crush had to see you at your worst, fainting in home econs, and spraining your ankle at dance, and you thought it was only one sided, and only jeno’s duty as a student councilor to bring you to the infirmary, it all changed when you nearly spilled acid on your crush’s oh-so-perfect face.

Lee Jeno. Student Councilor. Member of the school’s dance team. Visual. Most sought after chaebol, also heir to one of Korea’s biggest broadcasting companies. He had connections and friends, lots of them, from idols to even influential friends abroad, he has everything.

And you? Heir to your mom’s clothing brand, you had your fair share of inheritance to your name to be honest. But you were low-profile, only making friends with the people you trust. Everyone in your school was either filthy rich or a heir to some company or both. And most of the people had connections, not friends. Even the poorest student in your school lived in a swanky condominuim complex. You were pretty decent looking if you were compared to those of neighbourhood schools, but if you compared yourself to your classmates, you would be one of the less-better-looking ones. Make-up was part of it, plastic surgery is another.

Your crush and yourself were sort of polar opposites. Jeno was friendly and kind-hearted, making girls stop by his classroom just to marvel at his annoyingly good looks, one of the minority that hasn’t gone under the knife and yet this beautiful. He was also a talented human being, he can dance, sing and rap, and on top of that good grades and an mouth-watering amount of inheritance when he graduates from college. You had decent grades, looks and money, but your eyes shot glares at strangers, and the queen of comebacks. Last but not least, the formidable ‘ice queen’. You cursed at your genes for making your resting bitch face really bitchy, you got it from your mom. But under that ‘ice queen’ title was a really really really kind-hearted Y/N, which people failed to believe as they only made connections. You haven’t gone under the knife yet, as your mother chose to believe in au naturael. You didn’t want to either, not like you had to use your face in any kind of situation. You weren’t a model anyway.

Ever since you set foot into the school, you were classmates and tablemates for homeroom with Jeno, not like you were complaining. You easily made friends with Jeno, as he found you really nice to hang around with and one of the few not making connections. Exchanging smiles whenever you passed by each other, a simple, platonic friendship. At least that’s what you thought, at the beginning of high school.

Slowly, your teenage hormones got the better of you and you found yourself constantly looking at Jeno. Your heart started beating at the thought of the boy, and you were practically his partner for every single practical lesson for every subject in school. “Stars align and zodiacs match”, smirked Chenle, your cousin and closest friend in school. 

There was once you and Jeno were paired up for home econs, you thought you would make a good team, as you guys were already comfortable with each other. The school’s kitchen was incredibly humid and hot, while stir-frying the pasta, you passed out due to heat exhaustion. The humidity and the added heat from the gas stove was overbearing for your weak body. Being your partner and a member of the Student Council, (you were too, the both of you are the only student councils in your class) he kindly carried your limp body on his back, and constantly worrying about you. It was super sweet of him to even stay in the infirmary with you until you regained consciousness, recalling his big, brown worried orbs staring into your own. Black locks disarray and sweaty, and then flashing a relieved smile which melted you once again.

4 months later and your crush on him only deepened, you hit yourself mentally for choosing the same co-curricular activity as Jeno. He shot you a big grin when he saw you warming up on the first day of dance, offering to help you stretch, which you politely declined because you didn’t was to scare him off with your flexibility. But alas, the instructor decided to have some weird ‘flexibility evaluation’ which you vowed not to fail, due to your pride and reputation of a ballerina of 11 years. Contrary to your expectations, Jeno only eyed you with adoration? respect? shock? You didn’t want to get your hopes high.

Your instructor was impressed, placing you in the ‘top’ team. Your team bravely chose Gfriend’s Fingertip, also a choreography you had wanted to learn in the longest time. Jeno was in the ‘top’ team for the boys too, they chose BTS’ Not Today. You bit your lip, your teammates voted you to be the centre, SinB. You were flattered, they thought so highly of your dance skills, but you were also pressured to grasp the choreography fast and right, so that you could look the best and also help your teammates too.

While learning the dance break, your legs moved faster that your body could react, the inertia sending you to the laminated wooden floor, producing a small thump on your ankle. You groaned as the excruciating pain shot your ankle like a bullet, srunching your nose. Your teammates rushed to your side, worried as the team’s ace got hurt. Jeno’s team heard the commotion, and rushed to surround you as well. Jeno pushed through them, picking you up bridal style, causing ooh-ahhs, swoons(from the top teams) and glares(mostly from the girls) from the other teams. You instinctively wrapped your arms around his neck, afraid to fall again. Your instructor was puzzled when Jeno approached her with you in his arms, but she then hurriedly waved the both of you off lest your sprain got worse.

“Put me down, Jeno, I can walk,” You tried to wriggle out of his arms, but to no avail as Jeno suddenly ‘dropped’ you, producing a surprised yelp from you and curious gazes from students.

“Your sprain will worsen, princess,” Jeno whispered almost flirtatiously, sending shivers down your spine, “and I’m not Do Bong Soon, you’re not that light either.”

You scoffed, “I’m underweight, Jeno, how could you--” You gasped as Jeno’s faced inched slowly towards yours.

“I’ll kiss this pretty face of yours if you can’t stop talking till we get to the infirmary.” Jeno’s eyes darkened, causing you to gulp.

As much as you wanted his lips on yours, you shook your head profusely, Jeno’s eyes immediately crinkled into crescents, lightheartedly walking towards the infirmary.

In the end, stupid Jeno stayed to help ice your sprain, luckily not serious. The both of you missed dance, but none of you cared, you two were two busy giving each other playful banter to keep track of time.

“Your grades are gonna drop at this rate you are daydreaming in class because of Jeno,” Chenle snapped his fingers, startling you from your daydream.

You rolled your eyes, “Who was the one that got 16/20 for her math test and who was the one that got 12/20 for his math test?”

Chenle raised his hands in defeat, “Serves me right for not studying,”

“Neither did I,” You batted your eyelashes innocently as Chenle glared at you.

The school bell rang, signalling break time.

You and Chenle actually made the effort to pop by the snack shop to get some snacks together, usually it was decided through Rock Paper Scissors to who was the unlucky one to pay for the snacks and make the unwanted trip down. Neither of you actually bothered this time, as Logarithms sucked up all of the brain juice you had replenished during recess.

“Did you hear?” Chenle sipped on his banana milk, “We are getting our permanent lab partners for Chemistry today.”

“Mhmm,” You hummed as you munched on a churro snack, “I’ll probably get Jeno again, what’s new.”

“You see, Y/N, that’s the problem with you!” Chenle snapped suddenly, shocking you.

“P...problem?”

Chenle pinched the bridge of his nose, and hissed, “The reason why you’re always complaining that you can’t get Jeno to be your boyfriend, lies in the actions you do yourself, Y/N. At this rate, your crush on Jeno will be brought to your deathbed, the whole world knowing except him.”

You frowned, “So what is your point here, Chenle, do you want me to splash hydrochloric acid on him so i can see him shirtless? Hmm? Then after that expecting him to sweep me off my feet and plant a kiss on my lips? Like the ones in dramas and fanfictions?”

“Just... confess to him.” Chenle resumed sipping on the artificially flavoured drink, “I mean like, you have been liking him since forever, and besides, he has so many girls going after him. This is your golden chance, couz. And I highly doubt that your feelings for him are one-sided.”

You blinked your eyes, slowly absorbing Chenle’s words. You sighed, Chenle was right, even though you aren’t sure about the one-sided part. 

“Y/N and Jeno. Alright class, please take your seats beside your partner at the designated tables and wait for further instructions.” Your teacher waved the class off, and girls bursting into whiny sobs as they failed to get Jeno as their lab partner, again. It was a simple acid-base titration with hydrochloric acid and sodium hydroxide today, your teacher demonstrated the previous lesson and she wanted to let the class “have a go at it” as she believed in the whole “practical sessions helps with understanding” thing. It did help, in a way, but it was an opportunity for you to stare at Jeno up close, other than homeroom lesson. 

You hid your face in your hands as you saw Jeno approaching your seat with his signature eyesmile, you knew you were a stumbling mess in front of his smile, and your plans of confessing to Jeno would go down the drain.

“Y/N-ie~”Jeno sang as he settled down beside you, “We’re lab partners again.”

Don’t look at him, Don’t ever look at him, you chanted a silent mantra to yourself as you closed your eye in case you spilled your feelings too quickly.

“Y/N?” Jeno called out to you worriedly, “Are you alright? You look very out of it today.”

“It’s just the Logarithms that make me feel very blank in general,” You excused clumsily, “I’m just really tired.”

“Do you want me to be in charge of the burette or...”

“Actually, Jeno, I have something to tell you, and--”

“Alright class, please start now.” Your teacher instructed as students began to measure the amount of acid needed.

“Using a pipette, transfer 20.0cm3 of sodium hydroxide into a cornical flask. Add 2-3 drops of methyl orange into the sodium hydroxide. Describe the colour of the methyl orange.” Jeno read, “Do you want me to do it?”

You nodded slightly, recalling your phobia of handling equipment. It was in middle school, where you kindly helped the teacher to wash the petri dish, but your hands turned butter and the petri dish shattered, startling you. It was a measly petri dish, but it was kind of a big deal to the then you, and from then on you were very cautious around the cleaning of equipment.

“Y/N?” Jeno’s voice snapped you out of your reverie, “Its your turn to add the methyl orange.”

You unscrewed the cap carefully, then cautiously dripping exactly 3 drops of the indicator. So far so good.

“Sodium hydroxide is an alkali,” Jeno noted as he wrote the answer down in the instruction sheet, “Do you want to pour the hydrochloric acid?”

You complied, feeling bad that Jeno had to see this vulnerable side of you today. You poured 30.0cm3 of hydrochloric acid into the beaker, then placing a funnel at the top of the burette. Unfortunately, the burette was taller than your height of 5″2, and you needed to stand on the footrest of your stool to reach to that height.

You carefully poured the acid into the burette, heaving a sigh of relief as you emptied the beaker. Your ‘good’ day shattered when you lost your balance upon descending, and you expected to hit the hard concrete floor of the science lab.

But you didn’t. You were in fact supported by a pair of strong arms, and those arms belonged to none other than your crush, Jeno. His eyes bore a worried look as you hoisted you upright and rubbed your back soothingly.

“You must’ve been really tired Y/N,” Jeno sighed. “I think we should get back to class once we complete this.”

“O-okay.”

“So what is it that you wanted to tell me at the science lab?” Jeno rested his chin on his hands, expectantly waiting for an answer.

“I-I...” You wrung your hands nervously, Jeno nodded for you to continue, “I like you, Jeno-ah.”

Jeno’s eyes widened, but his face was unreadable, “Since when did you begin to like me?”

“I don’t know... since we cooked pasta i guess?” You smiled sheepishly, then slumped in your seat, “Its okay if you can’t reciprocate my feelings, Jeno. I’m fine with it.”

“But I’m not fine with it,” Jeno’s expression darkened, a side you have rarely seen.

“Wh-why?”

“Because I want you to be my girlfriend.”

You blinked your eyes, and also attempting to dig whatever earwax you had out of your ears. Did you hear him right, Lee Jeno wanted to be your boyfriend.

Jeno’s face inched closer to yours, then softly placing his hand on your cheek, “May I...?”

You nodded slightly, and without hesitation, Jeno leaned in and placed his soft lips on yours, an immense feeling of euphoria erupting in your chest. Your hands magically found its way to Jeno’s black locks, pulling him slightly closer to slightly deepen the kiss.

Seconds later, you pulled away, a faint red dusting your cheeks, “I’m sorry I shouldn’t have done that.”

“Its alright, like it was my first kiss so...” Jeno looked away shyly.

“It was mine too.” You confessed, immediately regretting your words as Jeno smirked, “Can I be your last too?”

“Maybe,” You shrugged.

Jeno brought you into his chest, red dusting your cheeks again, “What about now?”

“...Okay.”

Well, no one said that your dream knight has to be in shiny armour, he could be in school uniform too.

#i died numerous times in my death #ok i didnt sign up for this #lee jeno #jeno #nct dream #nct scenarios #nct fluff #fluffy writes

[realrhythmskrp]

DISPATCH, (05/03/17): Mirage Media has officially released information about main vocalist, Yoo Hansol, on mystery6′s official website! Han Sol is a ‘91 liner and has been beloved by fans since his debut in 2012. Find out more about Han Sol below!

I, Yoo Hansol, have read and understand the terms and conditions as my position of Main Vocalist and agree to honor the standards that are to be expected of me as an employee of Mirage.

OOC INFORMATION

Preferred name: Sam / Samuel / Sammy

Pronouns: He / Him / His

Timezone: -5:00 EST

Other muses: n/a

IC INFORMATION

Faceclaim: Byun Baekhyun of EXO

Name:  YooHan Sol

Stage name (if applicable): none?

Idol concept: Their concept is ‘Myth’, –withdrawn and quiet during initial stage interviews despite striking appearance and strong, clear vocals. Despite his soft speaking nature, it has been assumed that he is rude or dislikes his fans because of his short, often blunt responses and 'insincere smiles’. It could be argued that it was a clear juxtaposition against his bold even occasional playful on-stage presence and breath-taking performance. Other more dedicated fans argue that he is kind, despite having a justifiable temper and is one of the groups more sweeter members after admitting that he suffered from stage fright when he wasn’t focused on singing. Han Sol had intentions of becoming an actor, however because of the soft and richness of his voice, he had trained in dance and vocal and started as the group’s more weaker dancers. His on stage performance is often paired with very strong, emotional facial expression. Whether it is his confidence in his work or stage-ethics, Han Sol is a hard worker notorious for his 'hot/cold’ or 'stoic’ personality. Han Sol is unsure if he fits the 'unreal’ or 'un-natural phenomenon’ that comes with their storytelling concept. In reality he has a rather sadistic nature with a temper that can be both cruel and unforgiving albeit childish. He doesn’t trust many people easily and does not get along with other group members or significant figures as well as others would during a first meeting. He prefers to practice alone rather than with others, flourishing in solace and open 'free’ spaces. However would not do well as a soloist because of the softness of his voice alone and unsupported. Many of his fans do not know the sheer amount of time he spends practicing to strengthen his weaknesses, often pushing his limits with too many sleepless nights. In the end he respects hard work over just pure 'fragile’ talent.

Birth date and age: 11/06/1991  , 25

Company name: Mirage

Group Name (if applicable): Mystery6

Group Position (if applicable): Main Vocalist

Strengths:  Han Sol came for acting, - having often admired the amiable, rich voices of those who command the stage during an opera. He wanted to improve the range and clarity of his voice just to match those he had once collected portraits of in the back of his school binder. His voice has been known to reach the halls and stairwells of the different Mirage practice studios, and is rumored to force a lingering sweetness on the tongue of those who happen to hear. With his love for opera and theater, he has a good ear for composing, using primarily piano and computer program to write the various songs and melodies that fill him after long nights spent practicing his dance.

Weaknesses: Entirely unprepared to learn dance as a trainee, he found that he could not easily remember difficult choreography and would forget if he did not spend enough time practicing. In the beginning he would research many idiosyncrasies in order to try and improve the fluidity of what did not come as naturally to him. With that, he is unable to keep the clarity of his voice and match it with speed or what many would call a 'swag’-type atmosphere, making him ridiculously bad a rapping. With his yearning to better himself, and the selfishness that comes with the overzealous attitude on his craft, he is often susceptible to injury or sickness for overdoing it.

Positive traits: confident. determined. honest

Negative traits: impulsive. aggressive. impatient.

PERSONAL HISTORY

She brushes her palm across his cheek, the band around her finger is a painful glide along his skin, still a vibrant angry red. “You’re going to be okay,” her voice is soft and reassuring but when Han Sol looks up he doesn’t see her eyes, just the faint glow of a cracked blue eating his vision. When he thinks of his mother, he remembers snarling black devouring her pallid face. She doesn’t smile.

When Yoon Han Sol thinks about his childhood, he remembers the broken pieces, and what’s made of destruction is what is left. There are only a few happy moments— blurs of time beneath his eyelids or streaked down his cheeks when he chews the ash of a cigarette because he’s a pussy. He is told he has to become nothing—feel what nothing feels like in order to become something.

His father — is all flaring temper, meticulous planning and slightly dim in the head when it comes to drowning, not in alcohol (  If they could afford it, it was there but never in front of his son since real men don’t drown their crying in alcohol, they drown it with hate and war,) just the misfortune that makes up his long miserable shit-stained life. ( and those are his words, his drawn out soliloquies. don’t be a shit stain, don’t be a bitch.) His father was a war mongrel, post traumatic stress disorder sewn into his brain but it’s the loneliness, the contempt that melts his rational thought processes and forces military ideals down his son’s throat. His father couldn’t accept a stain like Han Sol that had wanted to become someone idolized not for the cruelty of war, but for a voice; a face, that could only remind him of the woman he beat for loving him.  

Han Sol would have never thought that he would become the mirror image of his father in the end– an acid spitting fire compared; The outlash, the rebellion; the inner turmoil and wreckage his flaring temper brings with it. And when Han Sol loves, he touches the bruised broken body of his craft with a tenderness only made for him. He would become Zero, if zero meant that could become something. Zero was a force, a massacre, everything and nothing at the same time. Zero, it consumes everything in its path.

#ryt:accepted #ryt:mirage #ryt:mystery6 #rythansol