#coda fic

[wildlife4life]

Fuck-It Friday Coda

Here is my 7x01 coda that I'm also counting for Fuck-It Friday! So thank you for the tags @theotherbuckley @wikiangela @jesuisici33 and @diazsdimples! Posted to ao3 here.

“How the talk with Chris go? He still seeing being a two timer?” Marisol asks with a sly smile.

Eddie blows out a harsh breath, “There wasn’t much of a talk on my end.”

She quirks an eyebrow, “Oh? You just letting him work it on his own?”

He shakes his head, “Oh god no. That would have just made an even bigger mess.” Eddie has to look away from his girlfriend as he admits, “Actually I asked Buck to talk to him. He has some um... experience with the whole ‘player’ thing.”

Marisol’s wine glass smacks loudly on the coffee table in the silence that follows, and Eddie barely holds back a wince. Still, he doesn’t look at her. He never does when speaking about Buck.

“You had your newly single best male friend, with a history of getting around, talk to your son about not doing the exact same thing?” Marisol sound appalled and it has Eddie whipping around to see her actual reaction. His girlfriend looked upset and disgusted? What is that about?

“Um, yea. Buck has the insight into all of that and he’s reformed and all that.” Eddie tries defending.

She scoffs, “Reformed? Didn’t he just break up with his last girlfriend because he got bored.”

Well, that was a very poor recount of events that had already been poorly told by Buck and Eddie felt the low simmer of burgeoning anger, “Buck did not get bored. He was trying to live, move on from his death, and all that woman was doing, was being a constant reminder of it.”

The anger rises at Marisol rolling her eyes, “Like I said, bored. But that’s not really the point here.”

He grinds his back molars, “What is the point then, in your opinion?”

She narrows her eyes at his tone, “The point is Christopher isn’t going to learn to respect women, be a courteous young man by talking to a man whose disastrous dating history is printed in a best-selling book by someone from said history. He’s Christopher’s fun friend, the guy he goes to when he doesn’t want to get in trouble and you’re feeding into it.”

Eddie slams his beer to the coffee table, making Marisol’s almost empty wine glass wobble from the force, and rises his feet, “After me, Buck is one of the most important people in Christopher’s life. You have not a single understanding of what they are to each other, what they have been through. What Buck has personally been through. He is not some womanizing asshole corrupting my son. He is Christopher’s best friend; my best friend, and the person I know I can turn to when I need help with Christopher. With anything.”

Marisol rises to her feet, “And you’re allowing him to continue take up the space I am trying to get into. I thought we we’re getting somewhere when you invited me to chaperon Chris’s date with you, when you opened up about your worries about him. But instead of letting me try to help you ran to a person you can’t bring up without looking away.”

He immediately proves her point and puts his gaze on the fireplace mantle, eyes roaming over every photo. There several of just him and his son, pre-LA to just last year before Christopher’s school dance. There are pictures of their family back in Texas and the entirety of the 118. Then there are photos with Buck. Christopher and Buck at the zoo. The trio of them at the mall fountain. Eddie’s graduation. Christopher’s 10th birthday. And second to last, Eddie and Buck, arms around each other’s shoulders at Hen and Karen’s vow renewal. At the end of all those photos sits the last family picture of Eddie, Christopher, and Shannon took at the beach.

Eddie thinks back on the picture Christopher turned down on his desk and the letter he almost didn’t read. He thinks about how his first instinct was to turn to Buck and not the girlfriend who witnessed Christopher’s player antics, someone who could give insight on how those girls felt. And then he realizes, Christopher wouldn’t have opened up about his mother to anyone, but Buck.

That space Marisol is trying to fit herself into, is too large, too broad, and perfectly Buck shaped.  She would never fit.

With a sense of déjà vu, Eddie drops his gaze to floor and softly states, “I think you should go.”

💜🩷💜🩷

Wine glass rinsed out, beer bottle in the recycling, and a reusable tote bag just barely filled with Marisol’s few items left at his house sat near the door, Eddie relaxes back into his couch.

Marisol put up a lack-luster fight to leaving, but eventually she drowned the last of her wine and called an uber. “He’s not going stick around forever. He’s going to break both yours and Christopher’s hearts.” She warned, “And you’ll be just as alone as you were in the hardware store.”

Eddie held back a harsh retort and simply told her, “I haven’t been alone since I met him and I never will be if either one of us has a say about it.”

He opened the door, Marisol got into a little gray sedan, and she went back to the home Eddie helped destroy.

Picking up his phone from the coffee table, Eddie pulls up his contact favorites, smirking humorously at Marisol’s missing name, and presses the person at the very top. It rings twice, before, “Hey man, thought it was date night?”

“Asked her to go home.” Eddie replies.

Silence on the other end for a just a moment then, “Man, you really need to find a better way to break up with women.” Buck teases.

Eddie chuckles, “Well at least there was no mess to clean up this time.”

Buck hums in agreement before softly asking, “You doing okay?”

Not a single lie passed his lips when he answered, “More than. But you know what would help?”

“What?”

“Go-karts in the dessert.”

A laugh that makes Eddie feel warm all over, “It’s a date.”

Hope you all enjoyed! Tagging (no pressure): @daffi-990 @exhuastedpigeon @fortheloveofbuddie @rogerzsteven @disasterbuckdiaz @tizniz @lemonzestywrites @evanbegins @buck-coded @devirnis @glorious-spoon @thekristen999 @spotsandsocks @cal-daisies-and-briars @aroeddiediaz @hippolotamus @sunshinediaz @watchyourbuck @lover-of-mine @hoodie-buck @elvensorceress @gayedmundodiaz @giddyupbuck @jeeyuns @bekkachaos @buddierights @try-set-me-on-fire @rainbow-nerdss @thewolvesof1998 @eddiebabygirldiaz @spaceprincessem @eddiiediaz @honestlydarkprincess @doublecheekeddiaz @prosperdemeter2 @transboybuckley @nmcggg @monsterrae1 @loserdiaz @perfectlysunny02 @dangerpronebuddie @missmagooglie

#fuck it friday #tag game #coda fic #7x01 #my fic #911 abc #911 spoilers #911 fic #buddie #buddie fic #evan buckley #eddie diaz #shannon diaz #marisol #anti marisol #break up #buck is christopher’s other dad

[finduilasclln]

lights will guide you home

Oh hey, I wrote a small 6.11 coda. \o/ I miraculously found some time to write right after seeing last night's episode this morning. This is quick and un-betad, and I'll try and tidy it up a bit before posting on AO3 but I wanted to post on Tumblr before I read any other 6.11 codas and decided this one couldn't hold a candle to those others, so... Title so very obviously taken from "Fix You" by Coldplay.

---

lights will guide you home

“A teacher, huh?” Eddie asks, bringing Buck a drink even though Buck insisted he could get it himself. But Eddie has this need to do things for Buck, even if it is just getting him a glass of water. He’s felt powerless for too long. Too long that Buck was in that coma. 

“Yeah,” Buck says, shaking his head slightly. “Not sure where that came from.” 

“It makes sense,” Eddie says as he sits down next to Buck at the dinner table instead of opposite him, needing to have Buck within arm’s reach. “You’re full of knowledge and you’re great with kids.” 

Buck preens a little at Eddie’s words. “Yeah?” 

“Stop fishing for compliments,” Eddie smiles softly because it’s easier than telling Buck all the ways in which he’s incredible. 

“I don’t know,” Buck grins, his fingers wrapped around the glass of water, leaving marks in the condensation. “Feels like maybe I earned a few after what I’ve been through the last few days?”

“Lying in a hospital bed, letting the machines do all the work for you?” Eddie teases, because Buck is fine. Buck is alive. Buck is back here with him. And if Eddie thinks too hard about it he’s going to crack and he doesn’t think Buck needs that right now. 

“Ouch,” Buck says, mock-offended. He brings his hand up to his chest, “Too soon.” 

Eddie reaches out and squeezes Buck’s arm reassuringly, desperate for that connection. 

“Besides,” Buck continues, “There was a hell of a lot more going on than me just lying there.” 

“Like being a teacher? Your brother being alive?” Eddie asks, going off of what Buck’s been saying. 

“Yeah…” Buck says, suddenly lost in thought. 

“Sounds nice though,” Eddie prods a little bit, studying Buck’s face. 

“I - ” Buck starts, then shakes his head. “It wasn’t right. Daniel - I. Yeah, I would have wanted - ” His fingers trace lines in the condensation on his glass. “But it wasn’t right. Maddie and Doug. Bobby. You.” 

“What about me?” Eddie asks carefully, because that’s the one thing Buck hasn’t quite elaborated on. It makes something inside of Eddie’s stomach twist. 

“You weren’t there,” Buck simply says, taking a sip of water. 

“I wasn’t?” Eddie asks, a sudden pang of disappointment going through him. Buck went through this life-altering thing where everything was meaningful and important and Eddie - wasn’t there? 

Buck shakes his head, pressing his lips together like there’s something he’s not quite saying. Eddie wants to push but at the same time he’s not sure he wants to know. 

“You weren’t,” Buck says, contemplative, “Everything was different and messed up. I mean, my parents were great. They were present, they cared, they - they loved me.” 

“Far be it for me to defend them,” Eddie says softly, because Buck needs to know, “But I think they do, Buck. However they choose to show it or fail to show it a lot of the time, they do love you.” 

“I know,” Buck says, nodding as he looks at Eddie. “It was just different in the dream. I thought it was what I wanted, that family, with Daniel. But - ” He takes a deep breath. “Everything else was just wrong. I knew I couldn’t stay there.” 

“I’m glad you didn’t,” Eddie whispers. He doesn’t know to what extent he believes Buck had a conscious choice in coming back to them, in surviving. But either way he’s glad Buck made it back to them. To him. 

“I didn’t have you,” Buck says with a shrug, like he’s aiming for nonchalant but he’s missing by a mile. 

“I’m not sure if I should be offended by that, by the way,” Eddie says in a manner that he hopes comes across as teasing, even though he knows there’s way too much truth in it. 

“No, but see, that’s the thing,” Buck says, his hand finding its way on top of Eddie’s on the table. “If nothing else, it wasn’t right because you weren’t there.” 

“Buck,” Eddie whispers, the warmth of Buck’s hand on his grounding him. 

“It could have been everything I wanted, and it still wouldn’t have been - ” Buck takes another deep breath. “Nothing’s right if you’re not in my life.” 

And Eddie knows how that feels, has spent days thinking about the possibility of Buck not making it out of his coma, of Buck not being in Eddie’s life anymore, and nothing about it was right. 

“I thought I lost you,” Eddie says under his breath, closing his eyes and focusing on the feeling of Buck’s skin against his. “I tried to get your heart beating again, I watched you lie there on a ventilator thinking it was all over. I snuck my son into the ICU because I knew we needed to be together, even if just for one last time, and - ” When he looks up again, Buck’s looking straight at him with wet blue eyes. 

“I came back to you,” Buck says, their hands now a tangled mess of fingers clinging to each other. 

“Thank you,” Eddie whispers, leaning his forehead against Buck’s. He can feel stray tears making their way down his cheek but he just lets them flow. It’s Buck, and he doesn’t need to hide. 

They stay like that for a while, leaning into and holding onto each other. Eddie doesn’t need to know anything else about Buck’s dream if Buck is not volunteering to share. He knows all he needs to know. Buck made it back to him, and all is right with the world again. 

#Buddie #Buddie fic #Fin's fic #Fin's Buddie Fic #911 #911 fic #Fin's 911 fic #6.11 coda #911 Spoilers #Evan Buckley #Buck #Eddie Diaz #Evan Buck Buckley #Coda fic

[half-bakedboy]

wrote my first coda fic in... too many months. i'm so happy my writing has been rejuvenated with this episode. god, how i've missed being in the minds of Evan "Buck" Buckley and Eddie Diaz. a sneak peak (cause i need validation to actually post this al;sdjflk;asd)

“Your Tommy?” Buck tastes the bitterness on his tongue like he’s got a mouthful of Eddie’s too-hoppy beer that refuses to settle in his stomach.  “I just meant—” Eddie cuts himself off as if he knows it’s too late for excuses. “I didn’t think you guys were that close.” “We ended up real close,” Buck jokes, an attempt at pushing down the awkwardness in the conversation. He swears he hears Eddie inhale sharply like there’s something painful in the words. “I’m sorry, I just… I don’t know what to do with this feeling, and all I wanted to do was tell you.”

#buddie #writing #911 on abc #buddie fic #vaguely bucktommy but not enough to tag #sneak peek #911 fic #911 spoilers #coda fic

[ahomeganeyatsu]

He wasn't running.

It's what he tells himself when he hastily exited his own room. Back pressed against the door, his hand on his chest. He wonders if hearts should be able to beat this hard. Because his feels hell bent on breaking out of his own chest.

It's not the first time they kissed. Far from it really.

He Tian has developed a habit. And although Momo goes near ballistic every time it happens, he doesn't exactly stop him. He knows He Tian knows this. Momo pretends but everyone and their grandmother knows he wears his heart on his sleeve. People just choose to ignore it.

So he knows. He Tian is aware of the fact that he gets overwhelmed. That he fights himself about wanting this, if he deserves it, if he could have this. And that's why He Tian always makes it clear to him that yes, you can, if you'll let it.

He Tian's shit at masking his emotions as much as Momo. Or maybe he's just good at reading He Tian now. Still, the wordless exchange earlier had been too much.

Too much to process. Too much to feel. Too much that he feels he'll burst if he stayed any longer. Or he'll never be able to stop. Or want it to end.

So okay, maybe he was running away. But not from He Tian. Well, maybe from He Tian. But not in the sense that he used to run away.

Fuck. That kiss really did a number on him.

He buries his face on his hands and nearly screams except—

"Are you okay, sweetie?"

He hopes his face isn't as red as it feels. "Y-Yeah, I'm good, Mama." There's a look on his mom's face that tells him she doesn't believe him. That she knows something but won't say a word.

"If you say so," she just says. "You should get He Tian to wash up. He'll sleep a lot better that way."

Momo nods. Not able to trust his voice. She turns around to leave, but she glances back. She taps her lips, and smiles. She leaves her son stunned, face burning and something far more gentler and warm blooming in his chest.

#tianshan #coda fic #he tian #mo guan shan #mo guanshan #momo #19 days fic #19 days #made some edits

[sortofanobsession]

Wasn’t exactly Wonderland (911- 6x11 In Another Life Coda)

Author's Note: The second of the fics I wanted to write for last night's episode. I've honestly only read one other person's coda stuff so far and that was a short one. I just hope mine isn't too much like anyone else's. Unbeta'd.

This one is Buddie, but it has a lot of the others in it.

Summary: Buck talks to Athena. Is a bit too tired to deal with his parents. Talks to Chimney about what happened. Then talks with Christopher and Eddie.

Word count: 3k+

SPOILERS for 6x11 In Another life.

Enjoy!

Buck hugs Athena and steps back to let her into his apartment. She sets down the box of cookies She brought with her on the table. She raises an eye at the new furniture arrangement in his living room. He sets down two cups of coffee on the table and shakes his head. She doesn't ask. She watches his stiff movements and the way he eased himself into a chair. He wraps his fingers around the cup. Athena sets her purse on the table and sits down. Thanking him for the drink. They had all their talks at kitchen tables. Normally it was hers, but this time it was his.

"How you feeling?" She asks.

"Sore. I would never have thought it would take this long for my muscles to feel normal after something like that."

"Your muscles got jolted with how much electricity? Enough to make them all seize up, stop your heart, and go limp. Then stiffen with lack of use. Not to mention both Chim and Eddie did a number to your chest to get your heart going. I'm grateful they did, but I'm not surprised you are feeling it." 

"I heard you, you know?" Buck tells Athena as she sips her coffee. "When you told me to wake up, I heard you. I was trying. And I…I don't want you to think I wasn't."

"Buck…" she reaches over and puts a hand on his wrist.

"It didn't feel right in there. It felt wrong. And even a place where I got everything kid me would have wanted. It was wrong. No Bobby. I mean, he was like a ghost there at the end, though that was more guardian angel, maybe? I don't know." That earned an interesting look from Athena. "But no Chris and Eddie. No you. I know my life isn't perfect, but nothing ever is, right? Like perfect doesn't really exist, and I was trying to come back because I really wanted to. And I don't want Bobby to lose anyone else. I don't want anyone to."

He decides to tell her everything. He knows Athena won't think less of him. She has always called him on his shit, but she never used his past against him like she easily could. She had always known he could be better than he was when they met. And he likes to think he has grown a lot. And he has Bobby and Athena to thank for part of that. 

"Maybe your dream was right in a way about one thing. You make our lives better. We know you would never hurt any of them, of us, willingly. Sometimes we worry you don't see how important you actually are. And after everything that has happened. I hope you can see that."

"I do."

"Good."

"How're the kids?" Buck asks. 

Athena smiles. "Other than you? They're good. May has a lot on her plate, but nothing you need to worry about. You should give her a call. I know she's happy you're out of the hospital. Harry is too."

"I will text her," he assures her. "Maybe drag her out for coffee when she isn't too busy."

"I'm sure she'll find time for you," she agrees. 

After Athena leaves, Buck has a couple of hours before his next set of plans. He'd sent May a text as promised. She had agreed they'd catch up over the weekend. Jokingly call him her 'not really but kinda big brother.' She didn't have to know that made him smile. Maddie had told him he was absolutely not allowed to go shopping. He had just ordered them to be delivered when his parents dropped by to check on him. He knew they meant well. They were trying to be more involved and more helpful. And he appreciated it. But it was getting a bit overwhelming. But he let them fuss. They wouldn't let him lift a finger when his groceries were delivered. His mother was pleased with his choice of fresh ingredients over frozen, but she did end up rearranging much of his cupboards. And he let her because as much as he was feeling better, he was still a bit drained. If he hated it, he could always change it back when he felt better. Though it would probably drive Eddie crazy the next time they hung out. He could totally see Eddie putting everything back because Margaret messed it up. He grinned at that. 

His parents took him over to Chim and Maddie's to spend some time with Jee-Yun. And that always made Buck feel better.

The one thing that was hard was the fact he wasn't even allowed to carry his niece around. Sitting down, sure, but if he so much as wanted to get up, he was stopped. And the way Chim was watching over him. When Maddie had taken Jee-Yun to change her. Buck saw an opportunity.

"I know I almost died, Chim, but can you stop looking at me like I'm a ghost."

"Technically, you did die. Your heart stopped, and Eddie barely got it started by the time we got to the ER."

"You have to, so you know it's not that big a-"

"But it is a big deal, Buck!" Chimney whisper shouts. 

"I know this time was bad-" Buck starts after making sure his parents aren't in earshot. 

"It should have been me," Chimney says.

"And that's why I'm glad it was me," Buck states.

"Buck," Chim starts, his tone serious. "Listen to me-"

"No, you listen to me. You have a family that needs you. You have a kid that needs you. I say the same thing to Eddie. I'm not actively going out there trying to end up in the hospital, but I can live with it because you get to go home to Maddie and Jee-Yun."

"You don't think seeing you like that hurts Maddie?"

"I know it did, but I'm sure it hurts less than watching the father of her daughter in a coma."

"What about Christopher?"

"Christopher has Eddie. Eddie knows how it is. Chris knew I'd fight my way back. He knew I wouldn't give up."

"Eddie was a wreck," Chim tells him. 

"He's been through a lot," Buck nods.

"Not like this, Buck he-"

"You changed the subject," Buck points out. He knows he has to talk to Eddie. He knows Eddie had a bad reaction to what happened. Everyone keeps telling him that. "I know Eddie took it hard. But so did you. And I'm talking to you, not Eddie. So please let me finish." Chim nods, and Buck continues. "You are the person my sister chooses to share her life with. And that means something to me. So if it came down to you or me, as it did. I will always take that hit."

"I'm not asking you to," Chim argues. 

"You don't have to. That's just what family does. Besides, you're better trained at bringing me back."

"That's not-"

"Can't change the facts, Chim."

"You really aren't going to budge on this, are you?"

"Nope,"

"You know the idea of losing you hurts as much as losing my own brother, right?"

Buck frowns. He could understand that, but he knew that wouldn't change anything in a life-or-death situation for Buck, at least. Chim had seen Buck through some terrible things and vice versa.

"And I love you like a brother too, but you'd survive," Buck assures him. "Because you know Maddie and Jee-Yun need you. And I know you will always do what's right for them."

"Buck…"

"I'm not saying I'm not going to let you do your job. I'm just saying I'm glad this time it was me. I made the call to go up. You didn't make me go. I went because I do keep track of this stuff. And we share the tough jobs. Just how it is. So don't let this change anything. Because it's what we all do. I'm just-"

"You aren't expendable," Chim stops him. Buck huffs a laugh because Eddie always says the same thing.

"I know, but you guys are better at keeping people alive, more medic training. So just keep doing your job, and we'll be good."

The rest of the night was more of the same. His parents won't just drop him off. They make sure he gets back into his apartment safely. He says he's just going to go to bed, and then tomorrow, it will be mostly quiet. So they didn't need to worry. He had food and he would be okay.

And the day was boring. He sent texts back and forth with everyone. Nothing exciting until he couldn't take it any longer. It was around 4 when he decided to go somewhere. He gets in his jeep and goes to see the two people he wants to see most. Especially after having spent the day before with his parents. 

Buck walked into Eddie's with a smile as always. Excited to spend time with two of his most favorite people. He could still feel that hint of guilt from his dream. From leaving a lost Christopher on his own. But like Alice in Wonderland, that had been a rabbit hole if he would have gone down, he'd have been lost for much too long. He may not have made it back in time to help the people that still needed him. 

"We would have come to you," Eddie tells him after he closes the door behind Buck. "All you had to do was ask." 

"I know, but I needed to get out of my apartment," Buck says.

"You were at your sister's yesterday," Eddie points out as he leads him into the living room

"And bored out of my mind all day," Buck states.

"Buck!" Christopher smiles at him. He gets up so he can hug Buck. Buck is quick to meet him for that hug. He doesn't care how the sore muscles in his chest move for the hug. He is just happy to see Christopher. Buck is happy that he can spend time with Christopher and Eddie and just hang out at their house. Eddie is the only one there to hover, and he doesn't mind the way Eddie does it. He doesn't make him feel like he can't do anything himself. Eddie will step in if Buck is having a hard time or if Buck asks. Eddie helps Buck take off his jacket and tosses it on the table.

"Won't be bored now," Eddie grins. "You have his full attention now. Might as well get comfy."  Eddie goes to grab Buck a bottle of water because he sure is hell wasn't going to let Buck drink. He shouldn't have even let him drive.

"When was the last time you took your meds?" Eddie asks. 

"This morning," Buck assures him. 

"Did you bring them with you?" 

Buck nods. "In my jacket," he answers. 

"Okay," Eddie nods and heads back into the kitchen. He comes back with a sandwich. He fishes Buck's meds out of his jacket pocket. Buck looks at him confused. "Best not to take those on an empty stomach."

So Buck accepts the sandwich and takes his pain meds. Guess he wasn't going anywhere anytime soon. They settle in to watch TV as Buck eats. It's almost easy to think it was just a normal afternoon on a day off. Almost. Once Buck is finished, Christopher asks him what it was like in the coma. Eddie starts to intervene, but Buck tells him it's okay. Buck tells them the abridged version. That it was like a weird dream. He was a teacher, not a firefighter. He didn't miss the odd look on Eddie's face when he said that. He does compare it to Alice's adventures. She has to learn her lesson and make it through the uncanny world of Wonderland. It was like here but different. He didn't have the heart to tell him about their lives. But Christopher was smart. He knew he wasn't telling him the whole truth. He knew there was something to read between the lines, but he didn't push. He was just happy to have his Buck back. Christopher was happy his dad was happy again. His dad had a hard time with Buck in a coma. He was their Buck. And he was back. That was all that mattered. 

But Eddie has read between the lines. He knew Buck was giving Christopher the kid-friendly version of his dream. So after Christopher was asleep, he settled on the opposite end of the couch from Buck, and after taking a long pull off his beer, he asked the question that had been on his tongue since he had answered Chris' questions. 

"So what about me? Where was I?" Eddie asks him.

"I kept getting hints about you," Buck answers. "Especially when the doctor in my dream told me to have a spotter next time I went up the ladder, and I remembered I did. I remembered I had had you." 

"And I will always be there to spot you."

"I know," Buck assures him, but the smile on his face doesn't reach his eyes. 

"But, I feel like there's a but," Eddie says, taking another drink.

"But I had never joined the 118 because I had never had that drive to save people. I never met you. I never met Abby. I never met Carla."

"No Carla, that doesn't bode well for me," Eddie looks down at his beer.

"It didn't…I never actually saw you, Eddie. I think even my unconscious mind wasn't sure I should go that deep."

That gave Eddie pause. Literally, his beer was halfway to his face when he stopped and looked at Buck.

"Why would that be too deep?" 

"Because my dream was a bit cruel but not that cruel."

Eddie winced. Seeing Eddie in his dream would be cruel. What the hell did that mean? "Why?" He asked instead of what he'd internally asked. 

"Because…" Buck hesitates. 

"What aren't you telling me? You were trying not to tell Chris something. But I thought we don't do secrets, not anymore."

Buck sighs, but he nods. Eddie couldn't hate him for not helping a dream version of his son, right?

Eddie did see the pained look on Buck's face at his question. Maybe he was pushing too much, too soon. Buck's barely had a chance to process what happened. 

"Buck, if it's too much, you don't have to. I shouldn't have-"

"You'd lost Christopher," Buck says almost too fast like it pained him to say.

"What…what do you mean lost?" 

"To your parents," Buck added.

"So in your dream, I never knew you, so I lost my son to my parents?"

"I think it was more like you said; no Carla meant you had a lot more on your plate. And probably after losing Shannon, your parents just put up a bigger fight because you didn't have Carla to help. And Bobby was dead. No Bobby means no Frank."

"And no you, so there was no support network for Christopher. He wouldn't have the school he needed. And there would be no one to keep me from trying to fight dirty. And that would have probably not gone over well in family court," Eddie admits. 

"But it wasn't real. I knew that so…so when…"

"When what, Buck?" Eddie was trying to be gentle. To not push him too hard, but he wanted to know what Buck's unconscious had thought of him. What has it used against him? But he could also tell this wasn't easy for Buck, and that did make him feel a bit bad. So he reaches over and squeezes Buck's shoulder gently. Mindful of the healing blood vessels that had left such a stunning mark on his skin from the lightning that had, for a moment, sort of connected both of them. Eddie shook that thought off. This was about helping Buck process his dream, not Eddie and his memories. His nightmares. "It's okay. I just want to help you process all this. I want to understand."

"You won't hold it against me?"

"What? Buck, no. Nothing would-" Eddie stops. He remembers every single thing they have been through. But he narrows in on the lawsuit. The anger he had had. The cold shoulder he gave Buck when he came back. He knew they had gotten past that. But he had thought the same thing back after the tsunami too. Buck needed reassurance that Eddie wasn't going to let that happen again. "Buck," Eddie's tone has shifted from incredulous to gentle. "You said it yourself. It wasn't real. I'm not going to hold something you didn't actually do against you. Just like I would never hold the things you genuinely can't control against you. You can't control the weather, although I'm starting to think the weather and natural disasters are out to get you. First the tsunami, now lightning, I think we just need to keep you far away from anything bigger than a puddle."

Buck huffs a laugh at that. 

"But nothing that your mind could come up with to…well, it sounds like torment you with will ever be enough to keep me from wanting to help you. Keep me from caring about you."

"Even if I refused to help Chris find you?"

"I mean, I'm intrigued because that doesn't sound like any version of you I know. And not just because it was my Chris. If you were a teacher in your dream, it means you still loved kids. You turning any kid away, which you never do, is odd. So I'd love to hear your reasoning," Eddie assures him. 

"I had to tell him no. I was so close to getting out of there. I felt like I had figured it out. And the. Chris appeared in the hallway of the hospital looking for you. He shouldn't have been there, even in my dream. He would have been in Texas. It felt like my dream was trying one last ditch effort to keep me there. Like it knew that if I said yes, I would end up finding you. An angry, broken version of you that would see Christopher and I don't even know…I just know I would have kept going until we found you, and then I probably wouldn't have stopped there. I'd have wanted to help you. And you would probably have fought me because you were angry, and I would never have finished what I started. Never made it back to that room. Never-"

"Woken up," Eddie finishes for him. And that was heart-shattering. The idea that Buck's unconscious mind would have twisted itself trying to fix Eddie just to keep him from the real world. Damn. Eddie rubbed at his eyes. "Then I guess it's a good thing you told him no."

"You aren't mad?" Buck was surprised.

"Buck it wasn't real. You put the real Christopher and everyone else first by waking up. You had to put getting out of there first, and that somehow brought you back. Brought you home. Brought you here." Eddie grins at him. "How could I be mad at anything that brings you back to us? Brings you back to the real Christopher, who snuck into the ICU to see you, Buck."

"How did he do that?" 

"Carla and I may have helped him, but he wanted to see you so bad. How was I supposed to tell him no?"

Buck couldn't help but laugh at that. He loved that kid so much that it hurts.

"How could I be mad at you when you seem so much happier and lighter now? I think about what it was like after the bombing, after the embolism, you were so angry, so worried, and I just kept seeing that smile you had when you woke up, and you hugged Christopher. It was so different from the past. And I'm just so unbelievably grateful that you're back. That you're here. That I didn't lose you. That dream version of me will never know what he's missing not having you in his life. But this me, I would. I thought I lost you, Buck. It took too long to get you down. Your heart stopped for so long. If I hadn't been able to get it back…"

"But you did," Buck reminds him. He moves closer to Eddie on the couch. It was his turn to comfort his best friend. His partner. "Even in my dream, I knew you wouldn't have let anything bad happen to me. Not the real you. You were the spotter I knew I had even in the dream. You didn't give up. You got it going again because I am here, Eddie. This is real. I'm here because you and the team refused to give up. I'm just glad I managed to return the favor and found my way back." Buck didn't know what kind of reaction he had expected from Eddie, but Eddie pulling him into a hug and burying his face in Buck's neck was not it. Neither was the feeling of sobs shaking Eddie's frame and the damp feeling of tears against his neck and shoulder. Without thinking, Buck held him close. One hand in Eddie's hair. "Eddie," Buck says in the softest, most comforting tone he can manage. "It's okay. I'm here. I've got you." That earns him a hitched breath and tightened grips as Eddie grips the back of Buck's shirt like his life depends on it. Buck realizes this is probably the most Eddie has let himself feel over everything since it happened. Since Eddie got hit by lightning himself. He pulls back so that he can look Eddie in the eye. His heart clenches at the tear-filled pained look on Eddie's face. "Eddie, it's okay. We're both here. We're okay. Chris is okay. You can let it out." 

"I love you," Eddie manages to say. "I almost lost you."

"But you didn't," Buck smiles as he reaches up to wipe the tears off Eddie's face. He hadn't expected Eddie to say any of that. But he is glad he did. "I love you too. And I'm right here. Not planning on going anywhere anytime soon. I do want to kiss you, though. It would be-"

He's cut off when Eddie pulls him close again, but this time their lips meet in a desperate kiss. A kiss that Eddie puts every ounce of love and admiration into. One that screams, don't ever leave me like that again. And Buck's kiss returns in kind. It reaffirms that he's there. That he's real. That he would never stay gone. 

#tw: hospital talk #tw: injury #tw: anxiety #tw: pain #tw: fear #tw: crying #tw: lightning strike #buddie fic #911 spoilers #911 fox spoilers #spoilers #911 fic #coda fic #evan buckley #evan buck buckley #athena grant nash #athena grant #chimney han #howard chimney han #eddie diaz #christopher diaz #gets real buddie at the end as most of my fics do lol

[rqgnarok]

lights will guide you home

read on ao3 

Buck runs.

Despite how he’s running towards his life, towards his family, he has to leave them behind to get back to them.

He leaves Bobby, high and drunk and somehow still fundamentally wise because that’s who he will always be to Buck: someone to lean on, to learn from, to seek comfort in. A parent, in every way the Buckleys never were.

He waves Chim off, the slightest bit relieved when he hears he and Maddie have met and even if this world isn’t real if it’s a universe where everything is absolutely wrong, Maddie and Chim find each other. They gravitate to each other and become one of the couples Buck admires the most in his life, has watched and understood more about love than his parents or his partners ever taught him.

He has to lean in and kiss Hen on the forehead, finding his footing amidst all the adrenaline when he comes to the realization that she’s the one thing that hasn’t changed. She made gentle fun of him the second she saw him even if he was a total stranger, helped him despite her better judgment, and brought him closer to coming home. She smiles at him, hits him on the chin gently with her knuckles, and tells him, knowing. “Go home, Buckaroo.”

He almost doesn’t stop for his parents. They look at him the way he’s wanted to his entire life, soft and loving and with their arms raised prepared to keep him and embrace him as they’ve never done before. He doesn’t feel that pull towards them but he does give them his forgiveness, for himself more than anyone else.

He stopped holding a grudge a while ago without even realizing it. How could he not, with the family he’s built? Bobby and Athena, Maddie and Chim and Jee, Hen and Karen and-

Buck does stop for Christopher. He feels lighter, suddenly, almost knocks himself off his feet when he sees that toothy grin directed up at him like sunshine itself. He kneels on the ground and Chris falls into his arms like Buck was made to hold him, like there was always an empty space carved out inside of him he didn’t understand until Eddie brought his kid into Buck’s life, gave him to Buck like the most precious gift, like-

Like Eddie’s own heart. Like a declaration of something Buck hadn’t been ready to hear.

“Can we go home now?” Chris asks against his sweater, and Buck hides his face in his little curls that somehow still smell like fruity shampoo, a detail not even the most powerful lightning was able to scratch from his mind.

Like the memory of Eddie’s go get them, cowboy. Like the fundamental premise that even after someone loses their memory after a coma, they don’t forget how to breathe. Buck woke up confused and dizzy and knowing Eddie has his back, always.

“Yeah,” his laugh is wet as he kisses Chris’ hair, the same hair strangers have confused for Buck’s genes in this smart, wonderful firecracker of a little boy. And yeah. Yeah, yeah, of course.

He helped make Connor and Kameron’s kid, but that baby isn’t his. This one, in his arms, that he didn’t meet until he was 11 is, and Buck knows it like he knows the sky is blue and dirt is brown and he’s coming home to Eddie and Christopher Diaz whether his subconscious wants him to or not.

“Come on, buddy, let’s go home,” he draws back to smile at his kid, wiping his tears with his shoulder. “Let’s go get your dad.”

Chris’ laugh is bubbly, and when Buck starts to run again, he doesn’t follow him. That’s okay, Buck thinks. That’s okay, I’m coming. I’m coming, I’m coming, I’m coming-

Daniel says all the right things. If Buck hadn’t learned what he was supposed to in here he might’ve caved. He might’ve believed him and stayed in a world where his job didn’t threaten his life and his parents loved him and his sister’s smile was always slightly off and he didn’t know any of his friends and the parents that stepped up, his partner and their kid.

But Buck knows. He does know, he doesn’t need to have a life-altering accident to know that any world without his family is not worth it. Not for anything in the world.

Buck breaks the glass, and he breathes.

He breathes, and breathes, and breathes.

________

finished the ep and realized I HAVE TO DO EVERYTHING MYSELF IN THIS HOUSE. hope you enjoyed!

read on ao3 / message me about commissions!

#911 fanfic #buddie fic #buck x eddie #evan buckley #eddie diaz #bobby nash #athena grant #christopher diaz #chimney han #maddie buckley #buckley parents #jee yun buckley han #hen wilson #911 spoilers #06x11 #in another life #coda fic

[regetoile]

more deaf reg and coda james since ppl liked it last time :)

here r just a few lil blurbs

regulus who subconsciously purrs like a cat and can't hear it and james who just adores it

james who invents special signs just to say certain things to regulus, things like "i love you more than anything," "don't beat yourself up," "come to my dorm later," "you look perfect," etc.

james who never asks regulus to wear his hearing aids like his family does. he knows they hurt and would never want his love to be in pain.

regulus who can't stop thinking abt how james' hands move when he signs. he's just so energetic

james who loves the little happy noises regulus isn't aware he makes whenever james hugs him or surprises him

regulus who casts spells to make himself hear for a few hours just to practice saying james' name over and over (as well has his first name paired with james' last)

james who loves to see regulus light up whenever he talks to his parents. he finally has adults in his life who don't want him to change anything about himself

regulus who loves that james snores because he can feel the vibrations and it helps him know that james is still there when he's asleep

regulus who can't help but moan loudly whenever he and james kiss (or anything else) but he isn't aware and james will never ever tell him to be quiet 1.) because reggie would get embarrassed and 2.) because he loves it

#jegulus #jegulus fics #jegulus imagines #deaf regulus black #regulus black #james potter #coda james potter #marauders

[ghosthunterbuck]

beer & apologies

(buddie) (722 words) (7x04 coda)

It’s late, later than any reasonable person would show up on a friend’s doorstep, but Buck’s got this bright, warm feeling in his chest and all he wants to do is apologize so he can share it. For a split second he thinks about knocking, but that feels a little too much like going backwards. Instead, he lets himself in and hangs his key on the hook.

“Eddie,” he calls quietly into the still house.

“Kitchen.” The reply is soft, easy, like Eddie was expecting him.

Buck steps into the room and holds up the beer he brought.

Eddie looks up at him and grins, soft and warm in the glow of the lamplight. “What’s that for?”

“This is ‘sorry for acting like a teenager and spraining your ankle’ beer,” Buck says, scrubbing a hand through his hair. “Seriously, I’m sorry.”

Eddie sighs and pushes an empty chair back from the table with his foot, gesturing for Buck to sit. “I’m sorry too,” he says.

“No, no, you don’t—" Buck starts.

“Yeah, I do,” Eddie interrupts with a wry grin. “You should definitely be sorry-er, though, so I’ll take the beer.”

Buck snorts and sits, setting the six pack on the table between them.

“We didn’t—well, I didn’t…”

“I know,” Buck says. “I was just—”

“I know,” Eddie says softly.

A few, quiet moments pass, and it’s comfortable, exactly what Buck was missing the last couple of days.

“Hey,” Eddie says suddenly, sitting up a little straighter, “at least now I know why you always said no to basketball.” He smiles, loose and just a tiny bit mischievous.

Buck splutters. “What? No! I wasn’t that bad,” he protests.

Eddie lifts his injured ankle and raises an eyebrow.

“Okay, well maybe, but—”

“Uh-uh,” Eddie says, “no buts. You haven many talents, Buck, but basketball isn’t one of them.”

Buck ducks his head and grins. “Maybe I’ll get Tommy to teach me, then I can beat you without playing dirty.” Saying Tommy’s name out loud gives birth to a few giddy butterflies in his stomach.

“You two make up?” Eddie asks.

“Yeah,” Buck says. “He uh—texted me.” The butterflies turn to little rocks.

“Good,” Eddie says, “that’s good.” He grabs a beer and twists the top off. “I really think you guys will get along, if you give him a chance.”

“We, um. Yeah. We probably will.” Buck grabs a beer of his own and stares at the label.

He doesn’t—he didn’t mean to lie. It just kind of… came out. Which, it’s Eddie. Buck knows he could tell him exactly what happened, right now, and it’d be fine. It’d be completely fine because it’s Eddie and he knows Eddie would be cool about it, probably even happy for him! But when he goes to open his mouth it just. Doesn’t.

“How’s—uh. How’s Marisol?” he asks instead, tripping over his words.

Eddie shrugs. “She’s fine, same as always. Apparently Christopher got her to play Fortnite, which, according to him, was a disaster.”

Buck laughs, shaking his head. “That kid,” he says softly.

“That kid,” Eddie agrees. He takes another swig of beer and sits back.

“Hey, wait,” Buck says suddenly. He lurches forward and snags the bottle out of Eddie’s hand. “You can’t have this, you’re on pain killers.”

“It’s my apology beer!” Eddie protests.

“Nope, two sips is plenty. I can’t hurt your ankle and your liver on the same day.”

“It’s after midnight, it’s tomorrow,” Eddie pouts. “Give it.” He makes a halfhearted attempt to grab it back, but Buck holds the beer aloft.

“Nuh-uh, absolutely not,” Buck says. “You can drink your apology beer this weekend.”

“My apology beer is going to be flat and stale,” Eddie replies, unimpressed.

Buck rolls his eyes. “I’ll buy you a new apology beer, alright?”

“Promises, promises.”

“I will!”

“Yeah, yeah,” Eddie laughs. “You better. Want to bring it over on Saturday? We can watch the game.”

Buck’s grin falters a little bit, even as that warm feeling bubbles up in his chest all over again. “I uh- can’t, sorry.”

“What, you got a hot date or something?” Eddie asks with a laugh.

Buck takes a long swallow from the beer he stole from Eddie. “Yeah, something,” he says with a hollow laugh.

He feels like a liar.

#i have returned and i come bearing fic #i straight up don't remember my tagging system so #oh well #911 #911 abc #911fic #buddie #buddiefic #911 spoilers #abbie writes #its a coda friends you know what im about #also i'm gonna revive the tag list tomorrow so sorry in advance to anyone who sees this and then gets a crazy late tag!! #or doesn't want them anymore lol

[homerforsure]

Saw the episode. Ascended to a higher plane. Wrote a small Coda that is as messy as my brain is right now. Bone Apple Tea.

"Heyyyyyy Buck!" Eddie answers the phone with a drawn out salutation that proves Tommy was not lying about him being sent away from the hospital with the good drugs. Or, not lying about the prescription, but about Eddie actually taking them. It wasn't so long ago that Eddie would take enough medicine to avoid being in agony, but never quite enough to actually feel relief. He wouldn't do that for Tommy, however close they are. It's something that Eddie's doing for himself. Buck's stomach was a swarm of butterflies three seconds ago, but that and the floaty happy way Eddie still says his name, has him smiling again in his kitchen.

"Hey Eddie. I, um, I'm sorry to call so late. I just wanted to see how- how you were doing."

"Eh, I'll miss a shift or two. But Doc says I'll be ready to go for playoffs," Eddie answers.

Guilt twists through him, harsh and acidic and Buck says, "Well I'm glad to hear that. They say the team doesn't have a chance without you and your, um, sky dunk." Eddie laughs, giggles really, in reply and Buck says, "I'm sorry, Eddie. I don't know why I did that. I mean- I- I know why. I was jealous of you and- and Tommy-" Buck's heart flips as he says his name and he's afraid the kiss is going to come flying out of his mouth and down the phone line- "But I never wanted you to get hurt like that."

"You wanted me to get hurt different?" Eddie asks, still laughing, but Buck feels stricken.

"No! I- maybe. I don't know what I wanted. I lost my mind for a little bit."

"You were jealous," Eddie repeats.

"Yeah, I was."

A long sigh and Eddie says, "I'm sorry."

"You don't have anything to be sorry for. I was the asshole. I could have- I knocked you out of your shoe."

"Do you have my shoe?" Eddie asks, more focused than he has been the rest of the conversation. Buck can hear him sitting up on the couch.

"Uh, no. No, I gave it to Chim. He's gonna give it to you when he sees you. And probably make about 50 Cinderella jokes."

"Right. He texted me. I remember."

"I'm sure he'll bring it by sooner if you need it. Or he could give it to Tommy." The flush is there again, hot down the back of his neck. Buck doesn't know how he's supposed to do this. Where is he supposed to keep all of this heat and possibility while he waits for Saturday.

"You don't like him."

"Who? Chim? He's growing on me."

"Tommy," Eddie answers in a tone that says duh. "You can't even say his name normal."

Of course Eddie can hear that. Of course he assumes that's the problem after the way Buck has acted since the moment they met the man. He thanks god that he decided to call instead of driving across town and checking on Eddie in person. His cheeks and his ears are burning like fire.

"He can tell, you know. We both can. He said he's going to come talk to you. Gave him your address. Wants to apologize." Eddie must have settled back down on the couch. He sounds sleepier, his sentences getting shorter and more breathy.

"He did. He um. He came by. We talked it out. I told him you guys didn't have anything to apologize for. I was the one who made it weird."

"So weird," Eddie agrees and Buck laughs. "You guys should be friends. He's awesome and you're awesome and we can all hang out together and it would be..."

"Awesome," Buck finishes. He thinks it might be.

"I forgot you don't know that."

"Know what?" Buck asks, when Eddie's mumble doesn't come with any additional clarification. "Eddie?"

"Hmm?"

"Never mind. Hey, you should get up and go to your bed. Sleeping on that couch is not going to help your ankle heal any faster."

"Tommy said that."

"Tommy's right. Come on."

Eddie groans as he sits up, cursing at Buck in what he thinks is under his breath, and asks, "You talked to Tommy?"

"Yeah, he just left."

"And we're okay? You like him now?"

Buck's blood roars through his ears and he wants to throw up and start laughing all at the same time. "Yeah, I think I do."

"Good."

He breathes through the sudden headrush as Eddie grumbles and hops his way off the couch and down the hall. Buck knows where he's finding his handholds by the echo off the walls and he winces when Eddie takes a misstep and swears again. He thinks for a second that he should be there, that he should help Eddie to bed, but Eddie would never let him. Buck wonders if Tommy would let him. He's wondering about so much now and he never did before.

"Hey, Eds?" The question is out before Buck realizes he's asking it, small and vulnerable, and he wants to claw it back and swallow it down before Eddie notices, but he doesn't have a chance.

"Yeah?"

Tommy kissed me. I want him to do it again.

"No, nothing. Just. I'm sorry. I was out of line."

"You were," Eddie answers. "And I forgive you."

Something settles in Buck then. A piece that had still been sitting off kilter and jamming painfully under his ribs. He takes a deep breath, and joy washes fully over him, calming and centering. He doesn't ask the question again though. He thinks he wants to keep this tiny, glowing treasure to himself. At least for a little while.

"Bring me my shoe back and we'll call it even."

Buck laughs, letting the sound ring out through his apartment and he can hear Eddie smiling on the other end of the phone.

#idk what this is #my brain exited my body several hours ago #it's not the fic i said i was writing in my head that's for sure #7.04 #buck bothered and bewildered #episode coda #911 fic #evan buck buckley #911 spoilers #allison writes

[chronicowboy]

Buck is stood staring at his couch with a wrinkled nose when a frantic knocking rips him from his thoughts. Frowning, he skids over to the door on socked feet and yanks it open to reveal a harried Eddie and sheepish Christopher.

"Tell me you aren't busy," Eddie pleads, already pushing into the loft to set down two dangerously full grocery bags on the kitchen island.

The loft suddenly seems a lot brighter, feels a lot warmer.

"I'm not busy," Buck replies as he shoots a questioning look at Christopher who only bites his lip and looks away.

"Oh, thank God." Eddie grabs him by the shoulders with a grateful smile before taking a deep breath. "I am. Busy. Like incredibly busy."

"Okay..." Buck narrows his eyes at him. "So, I'm hanging out with my favourite Diaz then?"

"Hold the thought on that favourite bit," Eddie huffs, dropping his hands. Buck's shoulders turn cold at the loss, he shrugs the absence off. Eddie turns to Christopher with his arms folded over his chest and an arched eyebrow. "Want to tell Buck what you decided to tell me at four pm this afternoon?"

"Fine," Chris sighs, looking up at Buck guiltily. "I need to bake cookies for my whole class."

"Sure, we can do that." Buck frowns, sharing a look with a still frantic Eddie. "When do you need them for?"

Christopher averts his eyes. Realisation dawns on Buck, and he shares a knowingly unimpressed look with Eddie.

"Tomorrow," he mumbles.

"Chris," Buck groans.

"I know, okay?" Chris groans right back. "I forgot. I'm sorry. Will you help me? Please?" He breaks out his patented puppy eyes, and Buck has to try hard not to laugh at the notion he wasn't going to help Chris all along.

Buck steals a look at an apologetic Eddie, shakes his head in a way he hopes conveys I've got your back.

"Of course I will, Chris, you know that." His eyes snap to Christopher when Eddie's face melts into that dangerously fond expression. He's been seeing a lot more of it ever since he woke up from his coma, and it makes him feel a little like a lightning bolt trapped in a human body. He doesn't know what to make of it.

"You are a lifesaver," Eddie tells him seriously, pulling him into a quick hug. "I've gotta get over to Pepa's, but I'll be back around dinner time, okay?"

"Oh, I see," Buck tuts. "You just want to reap the benefits of all our hard work."

"Obviously." Eddie pulls one of his patented frog faces. "I wasn't trying to hide that."

"Lazy good-for-nothing," Buck says, except it comes out sounding much more like you're everything.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Who here was asleep for a wholeass week?" Eddie retorts.

"Ass," Chris snickers.

"Don't," Buck and Eddie scold in unison, sharing a bashful smile. Chris just rolls his eyes.

Buck tries not to preen at how natural all of this is, thinks of Bobby's words in the engine just before lightning struck.

Life's too short to take those relationships for granted.

Buck has seen his world without the Diazes in it, he'll never take them for granted again.

"I don't think a coma is technically considered sleep," Buck argues, just happy that Eddie isn't flinching away from the reminder of the accident like he used to.

"Well, you weren't snoring," Eddie concedes.

"I don't snore!"

"Buck, the only reason I felt okay leaving you sleeping on the couch to make Christopher's lunch was because I could hear you breathing all the way from the kitchen." Buck tries not to think about a worried Eddie hovering over him, fingers itching to reach out and find a pulse, lingering in the doorway to the kitchen because he didn't want to leave Buck alone. "You snore."

"You snore," Chris agrees.

"Betrayal!" Buck gasps. "We're making oatmeal raisin cookies."

"Nooooooo!" Chris cries. "Buck, please!"

"Do I snore?" Buck demands.

"Nope." Chris grins.

"Chocolate chip it is."

"Double chocolate chip?" he tries, eyes wide and sparkling. Buck loves him desperately.

"Nice try, kid." Eddie drops a hand onto Christopher's head. "You get double chocolate chip when you tell us more than one day in advance."

Something warm and content settles in Buck's gut at the ease of Eddie's us.

"Buck?" Chris pouts up at him.

"Nah, not gonna work on me." Buck shakes his head, folds his arms over his chest. Eddie sends him a smile, the small and private one that tucks itself into Eddie's rosy cheeks, the one that Buck's pretty sure he'd return from the dead just to see again.

"Okay, well, you two have got it under control." Eddie ducks down to drop a muah! on Christopher's head, presses a quick one to Buck's cheek. "I'm off! Love you both, see you for dinner!"

Eddie sweeps out of the door in a whirlwind of frantic energy. Buck just watches him go, mouth half-open in a soft 'o' as the skin of his cheek tingles where Eddie's lips had been. He stares at the closed door with wide eyes, stares for so long his mouth goes dry.

Maybe he does have the answers, maybe he's had a couch all along.

A sharp tug on his shirt pulls him from his trance, and he looks down at Christopher.

"Cookies?" he says, entirely too knowing for an eleven-almost-twelve-year-old.

"Cookies," Buck nods.

#sami rambles #eddie realises what he's done when he parks at pepa's and then immediately says yes when she asks to set him up #episode coda #911 show #911 spoilers #911 fox #911 fic #911 fanfic #buddie fanfic #buddie fic #buck x eddie #buck x eddie fanfic #buck x eddie fic #evan buckley #eddie diaz #christopher diaz #buck and christopher #buckley diaz family #buckley diaz family fic

[honestlydarkprincess]

oh, bi the way

buckley sibling feels || rated: g || wc: 663

Buck knocked on the door, his hands shaking slightly. He blew out a breath and bounced on the balls of his feet while he waited for Maddie to answer the door.

The door opened and Buck felt himself relax as his older sister came into view. “Buck? Hey, I wasn’t expecting you! Come on in.”

Buck followed behind Maddie, closing the door behind him. “I’m sorry to drop in on you without calling, I just— I needed to talk to you.”

“You don’t have to call, Buck,” Maddie said, giving him a soft look. “You know that. Our door is always open to you.”

“Thanks, Mads,” Buck mumbled, rubbing the back of his neck in a nervous gesture. “Uh, you might want to sit down.”

“Okay, now you’re scaring me,” Maddie said, hesitantly sitting down at the kitchen table. She gestured for Buck to sit next to her but he shook his head and stayed standing. “What’s going on, Buck?”

He swallowed roughly and let out a shaky sigh. “I need to tell you something. I— I, uh, kind of only just realized this? It’s new. Very new and I’m— I don’t— I don’t know how to say it.”

Maddie watched as he paced in front of her. “Hey, Buck, look at me. There’s nothing you can’t tell me—“

“I think I’m bisexual,” Buck blurted out, cutting her off.

It was quiet for a beat and then Maddie gave him a gentle smile, standing up and holding her arms out. “Come here.”

Buck folded himself into her arms, making himself smaller and letting out a shuddering breath.

“Thank you for telling me,” Maddie whispered, stroking her hand up his back. “I know that wasn’t easy and I’m so proud of you, Evan. I really am.”

“Thank you,” Buck mumbled, squeezing her tight. He still felt shaky, adrenaline in his veins. He’d known that Maddie would be nothing but supportive but coming out was still scary as hell and she was one of the most important people in the world to him.

“Let’s sit on the couch,” Maddie said, nudging him towards it. “You’re shaking.”

Maddie led him to the couch and they sat down, Buck leaning his head on her shoulder. Her arm came around him and her fingers settled in his hair, playing with it gently and making him relax even further. They sat like that for a while, with Maddie just calmly carding her fingers through his hair and Buck waiting for his racing heart to settle down.

“Have you told anyone else?” Maddie asked when Buck finally settled.

“No, I wanted you to be the first,” Buck admitted shyly.

Maddie squeezed him closer, pressing a kiss to the side of his head. “I’m honoured.”

“Do I have to tell the others?”

“You don’t have to tell anyone you don’t want to,” Maddie said firmly. “If you want to tell the team, I know they’ll be more than supportive but if you aren’t ready there’s absolutely no rush, Buck. You decide when you’re ready. If at all.”

“Thanks, Mads,” Buck mumbled. “It’s not that I don’t want to tell them— or that I think they’ll be unsupportive— it’s just…it feels like a big thing and I don’t want anything to change. I hate change.”

“I know you do, but just remember you don’t have to do anything you aren’t ready for, okay?” She moved so Buck had to look her in the eyes. “This is something that you control. When and if you’re ready, the team will be there to support you. They’re our family. Everything will be okay.” “Will you be there?” Buck asked, looking at her with wide eyes. “When I tell them?”

“If you want me to, I’ll be there in a heartbeat,” Maddie squeezed his hand, giving him a bright smile. “You can count on me.”

“I know,” Buck smiled. He held his hand out for her to lock her pinky with his. “I always can.”

read on ao3

#jess.fics #jess.writes #my writing #my fics #the buckley siblings #buckley sibling feels #evan buck buckley #evan buckley #maddie buckley #911 #911 abc #911 on abc #911 spec #911 speculation #911 spoilers #911 abc spoilers #911 abc speculation #7x04 #7x04 coda

[wildlife4life]

Fuck-It Friday Coda

Tagged by the amazing @hippolotamus @jesuisici33 @wikiangela and @tizniz (who dropped a whole new fic!) Thank you so much! Hope you all are just as hyped for bi-buck as I am!!!!!!! Not much to say than what's being said everywhere for 7x04. Here is my coda this historic episode and it can be read on ao3 as well. Enjoy!

It’s never really a surprise anymore whenever Buck runs into Tommy at the 118’s favorite hook and ladder bar. Hell, before they broke up, Tommy took him to this bar on a couple dates. Awkward dates but dates all the same.

Buck is waiting for the latest rounds of drinks at the bar when a familiar hand lands on his shoulder, “Hey Evan.”

He whirls around and comes face to face with the very man that opened Buck up to whole new world. “H-h-hey Tommy.” He greets nervously, gaze flickering over to where his team, Maddie, Athena, and some friends from dispatch sat.

Tommy catches it and smirks, “Here with the entire crew huh? What’s the cause for this meet up? Didn’t see or hear about any big Buckley heroics over the radio waves.”

Buck finally catches Eddie attention, and his partner stiffens slightly at the sight of Tommy. They were all still friends, mostly, but after the pilot ended things with Buck, sides were taken… in more ways than one.

“You lied back then. In your loft, before I kissed you.” Tommy stated, staring out the hanger doors, hands shoved deep into his flight suit’s pockets.

Wretchedness gripped Buck’s throat tightly. He knew where this was headed, and for just the briefest moment he wanted to fight it. Fight for what he and Tommy had. “I didn’t lie. I wanted to get to know you, I thought-I still think you are cool, and I just wanted you see that.” His voice was high and tight with the brittle lie.

Tommy shook his head and Buck caught his grimacing smile, “Buck you need to stop lying to yourself and open your damn eyes. I have and you want to know what I saw?” His voice cracked with anguish.

Buck’s lower lip trembled, and he could feel the prickle of tears. He didn’t want to know. He didn’t want to face it. Because if he opened his eyes to what Tommy is seeing, the despair would be 10 times worse than what he’s facing at the time.

Always the bravest of two of them, Tommy scoffed at Buck’s silence and pushed on, “You weren’t vying for my attention. You never have. Evan you never did any sort of chasing in this relationship, I did. I so was blinded by how endearing and open you were about your best friend, that I failed to see you misplacing you’re confused emotions onto the nearest person showing you affection. Me.”

The tears began to flow when Buck shook his head, “No Tommy. I liked you; I just didn’t know about that part of myself until you showed it to me.”  He tried defending.

His boyfriend snorted, “Liked. Past. Not present.”

And Buck’s heart dropped into his gut.

Finally, Tommy looked at him and everything in his stomach becomes rancid at the utter heartbreak on the older man’s face, “I’m glad I could help you embrace your bisexuality. Truly I am. I know how freeing it can be.  But Evan, those feelings you’ve have for men, for that one special man have always been there and instead of facing them, you took the easy way out with me. And fuck man, it hurts. It really does.”

“Tommy…” Buck started, but Tommy’s hand gripping his wrist silenced him.

“Evan-Buck. Its-well it’s not entirely okay, but you didn’t know or see and neither did I. At least not until you came back from Chim’s bachelor party. You two couldn’t even look each other in the eye and you’ve been off since.”

That’s because he and Eddie got into the biggest fight of their lives during Chimney’s bachelor weekend.  Because Eddie had been acting off since Buck came out, even though he promised nothing would change. Because Buck once again became enviously green when Eddie kept his attention on the private bar tender. Because Eddie looked Buck in the eye and asked, ‘Why does he get that part of you?’ in the middle of their screaming match that Buck still has no idea how it started but ended there. Because they both walked away, too scared to confront any of those feelings. Because Buck knew deep down, he wanted to give everything he was giving to Tommy, to Eddie and so much more.

“You are such a wonderful man Buck and I know it was never your intention to hurt anyone. But us being together, it’s destroying me and you and...” Tommy sucked in a sharp breath, “And Eddie.”

And there it was. Everything that Buck has been denying since Tommy confronted him in his loft.  The person who was really behind Buck’s complex and confused emotions those few months ago. It was time Buck accepted it. It was time to open his eyes. It was time to let Tommy go.

Buck let out a sob and tugged Tommy into a tight embrace, “I’m sorry, I really am.”

Tommy sniffled, “You have nothing to apologize for Evan.” He pulled back and put Buck at arm’s length, giving him a wet smile, “I was more than honored to be your queer awakening and guru.”

Buck barked out a soggy laugh, “You turned my entire world on its axis man, but in the best way possible.”

“You’re a special one Evan and Eddie… god what you two have and what it can be.” Tommy shook his head chuckling, “I can’t stand in the way of that anymore.”

The younger firefighter stuttered out a breath, “I think that’s more on me than you.” And gets a hum of agreement from his now ex-boyfriend. He stuck a hand out, “Friends?”

Tommy didn’t even hesitate and slapped his own hand into Buck’s, squeezing tight, “Absolutely. Just give me some time, and yourself as well.”

Buck took two days after the break-up to mourn what had been his best relationship to date, to wallow in his unknown carelessness, and to confront those mixed emotions that drew him to Tommy in the first place. Then he packed his duffle and went to work.

Chimney was the first to confront him since Tommy turned down a night out at the karaoke bar and explained that he and Buck broke up. Hen followed because those two paramedics tell each other everything. Bobby reminded Buck that he was willing to listen before giving his shoulder a squeeze. Ravi seemed, relieved, but sympathetic. And Eddie pulled him into the tightest embrace asking, “Why?”

Buck didn’t give him the entire answer. Simply stated, “It wasn’t working.”

Months later Buck gave him the entire truth by taking a page out Tommy’s book and kissing Eddie senseless with a firm grip on his chin.  Eddie, who was babbling away in his kitchen about not seeing what was in front of him and desperate to know if Buck is willing to give Eddie every part of himself, kissed Buck back with ferocity. When they pulled apart Buck finally told him why Tommy ended things, “He saw what we were all too scared to look at.”

That was almost a month ago and Buck is deliriously happy with his life, with his boyfriend, with Eddie. He doesn’t need to be weird or nervous around the man that helped lead him here.  So, he winks at Eddie, telling him it’s all good, and gives his attention to Tommy. “No big newsworthy rescues. Though Chimney did rescue his 100th cat.”

Tommy shakes his head laughing, “An almost impossible feat.”

“Very much so.” Buck comments, “We’re here to celebrate Maddie’s promotion at dispatch. Officially a supervisor.”

“Hey good for her!” Tommy exclaims, “Honestly surprised it took this long. Her voice seems to be on all the major calls lately.”

Buck nods, “Yea. Would have been a different ending for all of us after the bridge collapse last year if it weren’t for my sister.”

“Man, you Buckley’s and your heroism.”

Buck blushes, Tommy Kinnard always the charmer. The other man smirks, knowing the effect he has on him still. “You look good Buck. Happy. Wouldn’t have anything to do with a certain firefighter that’s all over your Instagram lately? Hm?”

As if summoned by Tommy’s mere mention of him, a red Henley covered arm snakes its away around Buck’s waist and warmth lines up along his back. “Hey Tommy, good to see yuh man.” Eddie greets smoothly before nuzzling close to Buck’s ear, “Get that drink order in yet babe?” He asks just loud enough to be overheard by certain people close by.

The pilot’s smirk broadens, but gives a friendly slap to Eddie’s back, “Good to see yuh too Diaz. Been a minute.”

Eddie nods and his nose moves along Buck’s jaw at the movement, making him tremble, “It has. Maybe we can meet up to spar sometime.”

Before his bisexual awakening and the admittance of his true feelings, hearing his boyfriend make plans with another man would have sent him on a downward spiral. Now, thanks in part to Tommy, Eddie, his sister, and the entirety of the 118, but mostly himself, Buck is secure and at peace with his place in their lives, in Eddie’s life.

But that still doesn’t stop his big hearted, ever thoughtful boyfriend from asking, “I know I’ve only taught you the basics, but you could join Evan.”

Buck leans back into Eddie’s embrace and brushes his lips against his partner’s cheek, “Hmm. I’d rather go for the title on more equal grounds, and I really want to save myself the embarrassment of Tommy seeing my ass get kicked.”

His ex snorts out a laugh, while Eddie’s cheeks pinken at Buck’s innuendo of the actual kind of sweaty, half naked situation they want to be in. “Still shameless as ever huh Evan?” Tommy comments.

Buck shrugs, “Nothing to be ashamed of. My boyfriend is hot and I prefer to have my ass handed to me in more intimate ways. But you two can kick, spin, and punch your little hearts out. I’ll enjoy some time with Christopher, maybe even take him to a field and play the much superior sport, football.”

“God you really do not like basketball huh?” Tommy retorts with a shake of his head, probably remembering the first and last time they played, ending with Buck almost breaking Eddie’s ankle in a confused jealous rage.

“I won’t let him near anything orange and spherical.” Eddie jokes giving Buck a tight squeeze. “But if you are up to it, I would love to come over and go a few rounds. You do have a pretty sweet set up.”

The LAFD piolet grins, “Bring the Chevelle too, we can give it a once over.”

Buck makes a mental reminder to give the back seat of said car a good cleaning because the last time he and Eddie drove it out, Buck took Eddie apart in back seat and a t-shirt wipe down definitely did not suffice as ‘clean up’.

Eddie clears his throat, and his blush deepens. Yea, he’s thinking the same. “Sounds good. I’ll shoot you text and set up a time.”

Knowing the conversation is coming to an end, Buck flags down the bar tender before looking over at Tommy, “You should join us. Drinks are on,” He pauses trying to remember who lost the credit card roulette and laughs when it comes to him, “Drinks are on Josh.”

Tommy softens at the invitation, “Drinks with the 118, haven’t done that in a while. I’m in. Miller lite to start.”

Buck laughs, “Yea I know. Go join the others, Eddie and I got this.”

“Yea, I know you do. BuckandEddie, the dream team. Happy for you both, truly.” Tommy kindly states, then gives a shoulder pat to the two of them before strolling away to join the 118 and dispatchers. They faintly hear loud cheers and greetings when he gets close, their friends and family always happy to see the man who put his life and career on the line for them.

Buck places their drink order and when the bar tender slides away, Eddie pulls him back into his chest and growls into his ear, “You may not be green with envy anymore, but I sort of am.”

A shiver runs down Buck’s spine at his boyfriend’s possessive tone and knew all too well that their time at the bar was going to be short lived…unless.

“It’s no Chevelle, but the jeep is parked pretty close.” Buck breathlessly tells him.

Eddie gives him a wicked grin, “You want to take me in the jeep?”

“Wanna go for another title?”

I put in so many references from the episode and previous episodes too, as mini celebration to the 100th episode. Hope you all enjoyed! If you want to know when I drop coda fic go interact with my pinned post. Tagging (no pressure): @try-set-me-on-fire @devirnis @bi-buckrights @exhuastedpigeon @cal-daisies-and-briars @bidisasterbuckdiaz @rainbow-nerdss @daffi-990 @dangerpronebuddie @theotherbuckley @watchyourbuck @perfectlysunny02 @aroeddiediaz @loserdiaz @diazsdimples @fortheloveofbuddie @rogerzsteven @lemonzestywrites @evanbegins @bi-buck-coded @glorious-spoon @thekristen999 @spotsandsocks @sunshinediaz @lover-of-mine @hoodie-buck @elvensorceress @bucksbiawakening @giddyupbuck @goforkinard @bekkachaos @thewolvesof1998 @eddiebabygirldiaz @spaceprincessem @bibuckbuckley @honestlydarkprincess @doublecheekeddiaz @prosperdemeter2 @transboybuckley @nmcggg @monsterrae1 @missmagooglie @bigfootsmom @911onabc @911-on-abc @homerforsure

#fuck it friday #tag game #coda fic #my fic #911 abc #911 spoilers #911 fic #7x04 coda #future fic #buddie #buddie fic #evan buckley #eddie diaz #tommy kinard #jealous #possessive eddie #break up #get together #buck learns a few things from tommy #buck/tommy

[wikiangela]

we don't know where this is going now (don't be afraid of heights, let me open your heart wide)

bucktommy rating: G words: 5.6k summary: Tommy cuts their first date short, but to his surprise he gets a call from Evan just a few days later. or, 7x05 from Tommy's POV.

[read on Ao3]

It’s honestly a surprise when just a few days later, late in the evening, Tommy’s phone rings, and Evan’s name pops up. His traitorous heart beats a little faster when he answers the call and leans against the kitchen counter, where he’s been finishing up making a late dinner. “Evan?” he asks, confused but trying to play it casually. He’s good at that. He thinks years of pretending, trying to act straight, playing off gay jokes and even joining in to not make anyone suspicious made him way too good at acting cool and unbothered. He’s definitely surprised and excited, though. “Hey.” he smiles to himself. “Uh, hey- hi, Tommy, hey.” Evan stutters, and Tommy can imagine that flustered smile.  “Hi.” Tommy greets him again, grinning now. “Gotta say, I didn’t really expect you to call.” “I- I know, I just- I wanted to talk?” he says it more like a question, then huffs quietly, takes a breath. “I was wondering if you’d like to grab a coffee. With me. Tomorrow morning?” he says, sounding nervous but hopeful. And Tommy- Tommy has had a very hard time trying to say no to Evan, especially when he doesn’t actually want to. Besides, they can be friends, if whatever potential for romance didn’t work out. He’d be fine with that. He’s friends with Eddie, anyway, so he’ll surely have to be around Evan sometimes, and he doesn’t want it to be weird. “If you’re not- if you’re not busy? “Yeah, okay.” Tommy responds, trying to ignore the excitement swirling in his stomach at just the thought of seeing Evan. “I can do morning. What time?” “Uh, how’s nine? There’s this place I usually go to- I can text you the location? Or we can meet somewhere you like, that’s totally-” “Evan.” Tommy interrupts softly, still smiling. Even over the phone, even still this nervous, Evan is just adorable. “I’m sure your pick is fine. Just text me, and I’ll be there. Tomorrow at nine.” he assures. He thinks if Evan wanted to meet right at this second, he’d be there in a heartbeat. Which is a surprising thought. He really didn’t want to get attached this fast, but there’s just something about Evan… “Okay.” Evan breathes out. “So- so I’ll text you.” he repeats. “And I’ll see you tomorrow.” “See you tomorrow.” Tommy says, before Evan stumbles through a goodbye and hangs up, and Tommy just chuckles to himself. He’s curious what Evan wants to talk to him about. But he also needs to be careful, because he can see himself falling for him so fast and deep and easy. He shakes his head at himself. He’s being silly and ridiculous. Evan makes him feel silly and ridiculous and giddy, and Tommy doesn’t remember the last time he felt like this. 

[read on Ao3]

#bucktommy fic #wikiangela writes #911 fic #911 abc #bucktommy #the title is a bit long but idgaf it fit okay lmao #my writing #evan buckley #tommy kinard #buck x tommy #fluff #tevan #kinkley #tuck #911 fanfic #tommy pov 7x05 #911 7x05 coda #911 7x05 #character study #sort of #911 spoilers

[rainbow-nerdss]

7x04 coda

Buck watches Tommy walk away and he feels… he’s not sure, honestly.

Happy? Relieved?

His lips still tingle with the memory of it, the pressure left by Tommy’s kiss. He’s frozen on the spot, right where Tommy left him. He laughs, the quiet sound echoing through his empty apartment. He knows Tommy had to go, had to work, but Buck stands there, watching the spot where he’d just walked out, and he wishes he’d reached for him. Pulled him back in for another kiss, more than just a faint brush of lips. 

He wants to wrap his arms around Tommy’s shoulders, pull him close, lick into his mouth.

Shit, the things he wants to do.

And it’s all new, it’s strange and different and wonderful, because when Tommy kissed him, he felt stubble scratch against his own, and Tommy’s fingers tilted his face up, not down, and even though Buck hadn’t quite managed to set his hand down, hovering it over Tommy’s shoulder in his surprise, he knew what he’d find there—broad shoulders, muscled back, so unlike anything Buck’s known before.

But he wanted it.

He wants it.

And Tommy may be gone, may be halfway across the city, or hell, maybe even in the air by now—Buck’s lost track of the time since he left—but there’s still time. They’re going out on Saturday, on a date. 

He’s going on a date with Tommy. 

Buck finally drags himself away from the kitchen island when his stomach rumbles. He stares into the fridge.

He grabs some leftovers, too much happening inside his brain to cook right now. The microwave turns, and the humming is the only sound in the apartment. 

What does he do now? He can’t just sit back down and get back to work on the bills he was working on before. He can’t just… sit and watch TV. 

He takes out his phone, scrolls for a while, then navigates to google. His thumb hovers over the search bar.

Buck’s never lived a sheltered life. Sure, football locker rooms, navy SEALs, and the fire academy weren’t the most openly queer spaces, but he’s worked in all kinds of bars, alongside all kinds of people. He’s had friends, co-workers, acquaintances from all walks of life.

And he’d never questioned himself. He always supported the people in his life, stood up for them when it was needed. How had he never even wondered whether he might have more in common with them than friendship? 

That he’s… what? Gay? No… Bisexual?

That one feels better. He takes a breath, and the microwave beeps.

He ignores it, tapping his phone to stop the screen from going blank, then types in the search bar.

Bisexual

He clicks on the first link, and then the second, and he keeps scrolling, keeps reading until his eyes burn and his stomach is growling with hunger.

He takes out the now-lukewarm leftovers and shovels them down without really tasting any of it. Bisexual.

His phone pings. A text from Tommy.

Tommy: Busy shift, spending more time in the air than on the ground! Just checking in—still good for Saturday?

Buck bites back a smile as he replies. 

Buck: At least it’s not Q! Definitely still good. 

He hesitates for a moment before adding a heart emoji to his last message and hitting send. Is that too much? Too soon?

Tommy sends back a grin and thumbs up, and Buck lets himself giggle—just a little one, shut up— as he pictures Tommy’s grin, the way his whole face lights up with it. God, he’s cute.

Tommy: You better not use that Q word btw! Whole lapd knows about what happened last time someone on ur shift said that

Buck: Unfair! Was NOT my fault

Tommy: I’m sure… Gtg. call coming in

Buck: Be safe!

How is this the first time Buck’s noticed a guy like that? How has he never seen it before? Most of the articles he’s read are about people who always knew who they were, or figured it out once they understood what bisexuality was. 

For lack of anything else to do, or another message from Tommy to reply to, Buck heads upstairs and changes for bed, not really sure what else to do, just going through the motions. When he lies down, he stares up at the ceiling.

Is this the first time he’s felt something like this for a guy? He forces himself to think back, looking at his life in a whole new light, his friendships, the times he’s felt that same tightness, the need to be seen by someone who wasn’t a family member or a woman.

He thinks of Carter, a kid he played football with, the star of the team, how Buck used to showboat every time they were on the field together, used to play that little bit dirtier against, used to maybe glance at a little more than usual in the changing rooms.

He thinks of Leo, one of the guys he met working at the dude ranch, the one who just seemed to have a way with the horses, who took Buck under his wing on his first day, helped his clueless ass not pull too hard on the reins. Buck thinks about Leo’s hand guiding his, or resting on his thigh, showing him how to balance in the saddle. Buck wanted to do well at the job, wanted more than anything for Leo to look at him, a spark in his eye, and say “Hey, good job, Buckley!”

He thinks of that firefighter in Texas, TK, who Buck had clicked with just about right away. Buck wanted to be friends with him, wanted to keep him around, but he’d shut down Buck’s offer to take him for a drink if he was ever in LA by letting him know he already has a serious boyfriend.

Huh. 

Maybe Buck had been asking him on a date. Maybe this has always been there, under the surface, just waiting to be prodded open. 

And, hell, he realizes with a start. He might actually have a type. Strong, cool under pressure, unnervingly good at their job, able to get under his skin without really trying. 

No wonder Tommy worked his way under Buck’s skin so quickly like that. 

Buck finally remembers Tommy’s parting words as he walked out the door. “For god’s sake, please call Eddie. Now would be a great time—he’s on pain pills.”

He needs to call Eddie. Needs to apologize—Tommy aside, he’s been a dick this week. He hurt Eddie, actually hurt him, all because he let his… jealousy? Crush? Get in the way of his friendship. 

That’s not the way they do things.

It’s late, past eleven. If he knows Eddie, he knows he’ll be awake. Pain meds, plus worry about what’s going on.

He sits back up in bed and dials Eddie’s number. While it rings, he thinks about what to say. “Sorry” is obvious. But when Eddie asks him why? When he leaves a silence, full of understanding and concern, Buck knows he’s never been able to withstand one of those silences. 

“Buck?” Eddie picks up the phone, and Buck’s suddenly choked up, at a loss for words. 

“Hey, Eddie,” he manages. 

Eddie says nothing. 

“I’m sorry,” Buck adds. “For not calling sooner. And for—for hurting you.”

“Buck. You didn’t mean to.”

“I—Eddie, I don’t know.”

“What?”

“I just… I didn’t think, I just… went for it, and I think a part of me knew as I was doing it that I was wrong, but I couldn’t stop myself.”

“So you… meant for this to happen?”

Buck shuts his eyes, shuffles so he can sit against his headboard. “I… Eddie, I never wanted you to… I didn’t want to injure you, I just wanted… Something.”

It’s not an explanation, not even close to it, but it’s all he can give right now. Sure, he could tell him everything. I’m bisexual and I wanted Tommy to pay attention to me, not you, but you didn’t deserve to be caught in the crossfire like that. 

He wants to tell Eddie the whole truth, but not now, not like this, not as some sort of excuse and definitely not over the phone.

Eddie laughs over the phone, and it doesn’t feel mean, but it’s not comforting, either. “You wanted attention,” he fills in.

Buck exhales. “Yeah. Don’t worry, Maddie’s already called me out for acting like a teenage girl.”

Eddie laughs again, but it feels more genuine this time. “Remind me to thank her,” he says. “So, you’re back to normal now? Honestly, I was starting to have flashbacks to my first day.”

Buck… does not think about that day. He doesn’t acknowledge any similarities in his behavior that day and how he’s acted for the past week, because that… that’s not something he needs, right now.

Instead, he just sighs, and says he’s sorry again, and asks if he can make up for it. “Well,” Eddie says, and Buck hears him grunt, like he’s shifting positions. “If you’re free Saturday, I’m taking Marisol out to apologize for spending so much time with Tommy this week, if you could watch Chris? Say, around eight?”

And Buck’s about to say yes, but he stops himself. “I’m so sorry, I have… plans, on Saturday. Raincheck?”

Eddie sighs. “Damn, okay. Guess I’m groveling to Pepa again. You should come over, though. Earlier in the day, I mean. If, uh… you can. Chris misses you.”

Buck’s heart breaks a little. It’s what Tommy was saying, after all, and he can’t believe he’s been dumb enough to let anything get in the way of what he has with Chris, and with Eddie. 

“Sounds great, Eddie. I can come by in the morning, maybe we could go to the aquarium, or something?”

Relief washes over him when Eddie agrees. He’s got this. He’s going to be okay.

When he hangs up, he only feels a slight pang of guilt for lying by omission and not telling Eddie about his actual plans for Saturday night.

He doesn’t feel guilty enough to not send a text to Tommy, though.

Buck: Talked to eddie btw Cleared the air

He’s just about to drift off when he gets a reply

Tommy: Great! Glad you worked things out

Buck doesn’t reply, just smiles into his pillow and lets sleep take him.

#911 spoilers #bucktommy #evan buckley #tommy kinard #7x04 coda #bi buck fic #my fic

[bekkachaos]

got that, oh, I mean

T | 2.7k

"So... do you want to talk about what happened?" Hen said through the phone, and Buck immediately felt his heartbeat quicken. "What do you mean what happened?" he asked quickly. "How do you know what happened?" There was a pause on the other line from Hen. Had Tommy told someone? But surely the only one he would have told would be Eddie, and Eddie would have called him first, right? Or maybe he really was mad at him and called Hen instead, or Chim, oh god, did Maddie know? Maybe— "Chim was literally there when it happened Buck," she said, cutting off his rambling panic of thoughts. "He told me it was like you purposefully tried to hurt Eddie. I know you've been going through... something lately, but that's no excuse." "Oh, you're talking about that," he said with a slight exhale, he didn't know why it worked him up so much thinking she knew what happened with him and Tommy. In fact, he could probably use her advice right now, on the Tommy thing and the Eddie thing. "Obviously I was talking about that," she said, her usual Hen to Buck impatience noticeable even through the phone. "What else would I be talking about Buck?"

a.k.a. Hen calls Buck to tell him off about the basketball game, but ends up talking through more than just his jealousy.

Read the rest on ao3

I'm all about that Buck and Hen friendship and I just had to write them talking about Buck's moment and his feelings!

#evan buckley #tommy kinard #henrietta wilson #hen wilson #911 #911 fic #911 spoilers #7x04 coda

[sortofanobsession]

Intrusive Thoughts and Gambling (911 "Mixed Feelings" Episode Coda Buddie focused) Spoilers!

Author's Note: Intrusive thoughts are usually mental health related. And Eddie is a PTSD mess. I can't recall if they explicitly say it in the show, but he is. And Intrusive thoughts are a PTSD (and OCD) symptom. So if you guys get them, you are not alone. Please note I do not have PTSD or OCD. I have ADHD, anxiety, depression, and aphantasia. So I have a lot of self-doubt and some intrusive thoughts, but not the same way someone like Eddie might. So this is me basically guessing for the sake of storytelling. But hopefully, it is enjoyable. Unbeta'd.

Edit: Eddie's intrusive thoughts in this are more anxiety and in the moment based than actual PTSD thoughts. The PTSD mention is him trying to explain away what is happening, even if it isn't accurate. Just stubborn Eddie being stubborn.

Content warning: Intrusive thoughts (I mean, it's in the title), PTSD, anxiety, doubt, self-esteem issues, gambling, relationship uncertainty, swearing, pining, gay thoughts (not a bad thing but could still be triggering so I'm tagging it)

Buddie centric events from 6x13 "Mixed Feelings"

Eddie's intrusive thoughts are in quoted italics.

“You brought this on yourself, Eddie.” Eddie’s brain tells him. “Buck looks fucking fantastic in that outfit, and that’s because you told him to dress nice. And Buck understood the assignment this time.  A+. Gold Star. Job well done by him. That button-down that looks stupid good on him.” And Buck just had to pick a jacket Eddie just wanted to touch. His fingers itched to just reach out and run down Buck’s arm, or side, or anywhere. “Yeah, that would go over like a lead balloon.” Eddie knows it. He needs to get a grip on himself. His brain betrays him and really leans into that idea and the idea of it not just being him to grip his… “Nope, stupid brain, not like that. Focus. This is supposed to be about utilizing Buck’s newfound trauma-gifted math prowess.“

He gets why Buck is uneasy about all this. But why did Eddie feel so nervous? Why had he taken so damn long to actually pick a suit? He thinks about the last time he had so much trouble picking out a suit with Ana, and that had landed him in the ER with a panic attack. But this…this was different. His heart was pounding for a very different reason. Excitement. This was him and Buck doing something sketchy. And it feels right. Like that little adrenaline rush, he gets when they work on a dangerous call. But more not really. That’s not exactly what he feels. He feels…yeah, okay. He feels like he’s going on a first date. He thinks about his own first dates. Then he thinks about what he knows about Buck’s first dates. He thinks about what Carla and Bobby, hell even Buck, have told him about the disastrous first date he had with Abby. He literally choked. Buck nearly died. But this isn’t- No, this is him and Buck. They’re best friends, and they hang out all the time. With and without Christopher. Then why does this feel so different? Is it because he wishes it was a first date? Eddie has to quit thinking about that. Buck is talking to him. He has to focus. Buck needs to relax. And for Buck to relax, Eddie needs to help him. “Oh, I know what would make him relax. Oh, so many ideas. No, brain…no. Don’t even. The suit stays clean. So keep it clean, brain. Focus.”  

Eddie won't lie. He loves knowing things that Buck doesn’t, but mostly he likes how happy surprises, the good kind, make his best friend. Sure, Buck might have had his doubts about where Eddie was taking him, but he didn’t resist. He trusts Eddie as Eddie trusts him. 

Eddie looks at the people around them. They know these people, at least a number of them. Yeah, this is a date night situation. And by the knowing looks he getting from a few of them, they see what Eddie wishes was true. But Eddie is selfish. He wants Buck. The whole lightning strike had made that very clear. It had been like his heart was ripped out of his chest when Buck was in the coma. He also doesn’t want to lose what they have. He doesn’t want to put himself on the line and risk losing Buck. He just got him back. 

At the table, when Buck looks at him, somewhat unsure, Eddie knows what to do. Encouraging him. “Buck thrives on assurance and praise.” Eddie always has a hard time nailing down how he feels when Buck looks at him like that. Part of him is overjoyed that Buck looks at him for assurance. That Eddie’s praise is something that Buck looks for. Or, more important, right now, he trusts Eddie to know what to do. He knows Eddie isn’t going to intentionally steer him wrong more often than not. But part of it tugs at Eddie’s heart differently. He knows Buck isn’t always the most confident man he sometimes presents. He knows that Buck has self-esteem issues. Buck so often doubts himself and his decisions. “He deserves better, and you have to make sure he gets it. With or without you.” Yeah, Buck needed that. Buck doesn’t think Buck deserves good things or to be happy. He’s gotten better about it. The coma, oddly enough, had helped a bit with that. But the way he is looking to Eddie now, this is more of Buck being unsure about what Eddie has gotten them into. Eddie doesn’t have those doubts. He knows Buck can do this. The easiest way to assure his partner is a smile and nod. And it seemed to work because Buck becomes more of his usual self as the night goes on. Probably aided by the fact they do know the people around them. So Eddie lets himself enjoy the evening. The drinks and nonchalance were more than just a cover for doing something potentially sketchy with people who are technically their superior. He was content, happy. Buck was there, seemingly having a good time, embracing this new aspect of his life. They were socializing outside their tight-knit team, as people tell them they often should. These are still people they trust. They literally trust these people with their lives, especially Chief Williams and Captain Mehta. Buck trusted them. Eddie did, without a doubt. Mehta had kept them both alive when Eddie was shot. “He did what you couldn’t.” He had kept Buck from getting shot. And that meant more to Eddie than anyone could possibly know. Buck’s survival was increasingly essential for Eddie’s sanity. “Proved that during the lawsuit. Just ask Frank.” Eddie shakes himself. “Shut up, stupid thoughts. Frank says you’re just PTSD. ” Yeah, PTSD. He was working on that. Getting out and doing something safe, something grown-up with people he trusts. He was doing that. Frank would say that was a good thing, right? Maybe not the manipulating the game part, but it wasn’t illegal. So that’s better than his previous choices. “Focus.”   

But then Buck is smiling and looking over at Eddie as the chief asks him how he wants his winnings. And Eddie’s pretty sure his heart melts. Those stupid blue eyes shine with excitement and always has that warm feeling spreading in Eddie’s chest. Eddie smiles back without thinking because that’s just how he is around Buck. He genuinely doesn’t care how Buck answers the question. Eddie is just beyond happy at how well Buck had done. How well Buck handled the entire situation. And how happy Buck seemed to be. That smile on Buck’s face made Eddie’s heart soar every damn time. 

“I guess you were right, Eddie,” Buck grins. “Low steaks.”

“His humor was unaffected by the lightning,” Eddie says. Internally his brain adds, “You want to smile. You want to laugh. And you know it. You love his dumb humor.” How such a ridiculous man could have a stranglehold on Eddie’s heart is something he will never fully understand. Buck could be so frustrating and so ridiculous, but damn it, he adored him. Buck could be almost insufferable at times. Almost. Eddie would gladly suffer for Buck’s attention. Buck’s dumb puns, tangental rants on the most random topics, and an inability to know when he should probably shut that beautiful mouth of his were just part of what made Buck…Buck. And Eddie loved every second of it. If that meant Eddie had to be on his toes to wrangle Buck in every now and again, both on and off duty, Eddie would do it in a heartbeat as long as Christopher was taken care of. And Eddie didn’t have to worry about Christopher when Buck was around. He was always Buck’s number-one priority. And that, that had been what had started Eddie down this path. Buck and Christopher. The only people Eddie truly needed in his life. He loved his family and his team, but at the end of the day, nothing and no one mattered as much to him as those two. His job was near the top of his priorities. If only because keeping his job meant he had everything he needed for Christopher, but also that he could keep Buck safe. Keep him alive. He’d almost lost him too many times to risk not being there now. “And now we’re back to not wanting to jeopardize how things are. It always comes back to that.” He knew he loved his best friend. “But do the others know? You have never been subtle when it comes to him.” He’s pretty sure even Chief Williams and Captain Mehta know now. If they don’t, they probably have their suspicions. 

“Do you think she knows?” Buck asks him. And Eddie doesn’t know how to answer that because his mind had asked the same question, and it took him a minute to realize that Buck was asking about the card games. She might not know, but this would not be something they make a regular thing. The cards with the chief, that is. Eddie would love to take Buck out for another night like this. One where they could just have fun, win a few games, and just be the two of them, surrounded by strangers that Eddie didn’t care about. That would be amazing. More like an actual date than…there his brain goes again. “A date.” This wasn’t actually a date. It may have felt like the perfect opportunity, but it still wasn’t one. It was just another opportunity for Eddie to show off how amazing a guy Buck is. To show off how proud he is of his best friend. To bask in how lucky he is that Buck is in his life. That he is his best friend. Does he wish he was more than just his best friend? Of course. Was he willing to risk their friendship by asking for more? Hell no. Not yet. He just got Buck back. This…this was enough. Just bumping shoulders with him as they leave the building was more than enough. For now.   

#tw: intrusive thoughts #tw: ptsd #tw: anxiety #tw: doubt #tw: self esteem issues #tw: gambling #tw: pining #tw: gay thoughts #tw: swearing #tw: cursing #spoilers #Buddie #Buddie fic #coda fic #911 coda fic #911 season 6 coda #911 6x13 coda fic #911 spoilers #911 fox spoilers #911 on fox spoilers #buck x eddie #evan buck buckley #eddie diaz #tw: relationship uncertainty