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virisdescently · 1 year

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WORTH THE WAIT

— ⟡ draco malfoy x f!reader

✎ summary: the slytherin gang decides to play truth or dare.

• notes: set in 6th year, mentions of alcohol, mentions of prison, gets a little heated but not much

The Slytherin common room was peaceful as the six 6th years sat in silence, each in their own little world. Pansy and Daphne were sprawled across the floor, magazines in hand as they skimmed through the pages mindlessly. Theodore sat in the arm chair studying for the upcoming History of Magic exam while Blaise laid on the couch across from him, resting his eyes. On the other couch, Draco sat deep in thought with (Y/n) next to him reading a book. The six of them were used to relaxing and unwinding nights like this, having been friends since childhood.

“I’m bored” Pansy nonchalantly announced. The others turned their heads to her.

“Pans, you’re always bored unless you’ve got gin in your system” Daphne teases. Pansy slightly chuckled and rolled her eyes.

“Very funny, Daph” said the raven-haired girl, sighing. Pansy clicked her tongue, thinking of activities to cure her boredom. Suddenly, an idea popped into her head.

“Oh, I have an idea!” Pansy announced, sitting up, “let’s play truth or dare!”

“We aren’t 13 anymore, Pansy” Draco said, rolling his eyes. He’d been in quite the pissy mood lately. Nobody knew exactly why, but everyone figured it had something to do with his father’s imprisonment.

“You don’t have to be 13 to have fun with your friends, Draco” Pansy said, huffing at the blonde boy.

“I for one think it’s a great idea, Pansy” Daphne chimed in, now sitting up as well. Pansy smiled at her.

“I knew I could count on you, Daph” Pansy said, “what about you, (Y/n)? Up for a bit of fun?” Pansy leaned toward the (y/h/c) girl, a mischievous glimmer in her eyes.

“Oh, why the hell not” (Y/n) said smiling, putting her book down next to her. Pansy and Daphne smiled as they began to bother the boys about joining in on the game.

“Blaise? Theodore?” Daphne prompted. Theodore set his notes aside as turned to the blonde girl.

“I suppose a study break is in order” he said smiling, and Blaise nodded, sitting up on the couch.

“I guess I’ll join, as long as Mr. Grumpy-pants over here does too” Blaise said, smirking at his friend. He knew that Draco was stressing about something, and figured the game could distract the blonde from his worries. Draco turned his head to Blaise, a look of do I have to? written on his face. Blaise then returned with his own look that said yes, mate, c’mon don’t be a party pooper.

“Fine, I’ll join - but only because I wouldn’t want Blaise to bother me for the next bloody hour about this” said Draco. Blaise laughed as the others rolled their eyes at the blonde’s stubborn nature.

“It’ll be fun, Draco, you’ll see” said Daphne, playfully winking at her gloomy friend. Draco returned with an eye roll of his own. Daphne thought that if he would’ve done it once more, his eyes would be stuck in the back of his head. She slightly giggled at the thought.

“Shall we begin?” asked Theodore. Pansy nodded eagerly.

“I’ll go first” she said, “Daphne, truth or dare?”

“Truth” Daphne responded. Pansy smirked.

“Is it true you had a thing for Neville Longbottom last year?” Daphne gasped and playfully shoved Pansy.

“How did you know about that?!” exclaimed Daphne. Pansy chuckled.

“So it is true, then?” she prompted.

“Yes, but I don’t have a thing for him anymore - and stop dodging my question! How did you know?!” Daphne inquired.

Pansy gave her a mischievous smile and said, “a girl never tells her secrets.” Daphne shook her head in disbelief. Pansy always had a way of finding out gossip before anyone else. It was like a sixth sense or a superpower.

The game went on for a few minutes, with the group sharing some laughs and giggles. Even Draco seemed to finally relax and enjoy himself. It came time for Blaise to ask a question.

“(Y/n), truth or dare?” he asked, a mischievous smirk on his face. (Y/n) shot him a warning glance, hoping he didn’t make her do or say anything too stupid.

“Dare” she responded. Whatever idea Blaise had, the curious side of her wanted to know - even if it meant embarrassing herself.

“Hm… let’s see” Blaise pretended to ponder, “oh, I know! (Y/n), I dare you to give Draco hear a kiss.” Blaise’s smile was as big as could be, while (Y/n) was rendered nearly speechless and Draco’s eyes went wide, involuntarily blushing a crimson red.

Blaise knew that his best mate harbored deep feelings for the (y/h/c) girl. Ever since 2nd year, he’d had to listen to Draco’s long, drawn-out speeches about how much he adored (Y/n), and judging by the way (Y/n) always seemed to care for Draco in a different way than the others, he suspected she reciprocated Draco’s feelings. Besides, everyone always figured the two would end up together at some point, this was just Blaise’s way of hurrying up the process.

“I- uh- well, I suppose if Draco is okay with it” (Y/n) said, gaining some composure, “it would be silly to use a chicken so early in the game.” Blaise wasn’t buying her reasoning for wanting to complete the dare, but he had no complaints.

“Well, a dare is a dare, right (Y/n)?” Draco said smirking, putting on a nonchalant and cocky facade, even though internally he was panicked. He was finally about to kiss the girl of his dreams after years of pining and waiting. He wanted this kiss to be absolutely perfect.

“I suppose so” said (Y/n), blushing madly as she smiled at Draco. Truth be told, (Y/n) always had a bit of a thing for the blonde. He somehow managed to capture her heart with his sarcastic remarks and signature smirks, as well as his caring and protective nature that he tries oh so hard to conceal in front of others.

“Well, get to the kissing!” Pansy interrupted the awkward staring between the two anxious teens. Draco gave (Y/n) one more smirk, before cupping her face and leaning in to begin the dare.

“Are you sure about this, (Y/n/n)?” Draco whispered, his breathe fanning across (Y/n) cheek. She nodded bashfully and smiled sweetly.

“I am, Dray” she whispered back, making Draco blush at the use of his nickname, “kiss me.”

That was all Draco needed to hear before connecting his lips with hers. The world around the two seemed to stop for both Slytherins as their lips met for the first time. Neither of them were prepared for the intensity of the kiss, caused by the years of waiting and pining from both ends. Draco felt like a starving man who had finally eaten a ravishing meal, while (Y/n) felt like everything in her life just clicked. Before she knew of her attraction to the boy, whereas now she was certain he was her home.

Beginning passionately, yet gently, the kiss soon morphed into more, as their tongues danced together while their lips told stories of love and lust. Draco’s hand slid down from (Y/n)’s cheek down to her waist, pulling her even closer to him. He needed more of her. He needed her forever.

Ahem. A noise of discontent suddenly interrupted Draco and (Y/n)’s intense make out session. (Y/n) leaped back from Draco, and turned around to see her friends looking at the two with knowing looks on their faces.

“You know we are right here, correct?” Theodore said. He had a look of slight irritation on his face, but deep down he was happy his friends seemed to enjoy the kiss so much. It was about time those two got together, he thought. It seemed as if Pansy was thinking the same thing, as she had a small smirk on her face.

“Sorry” mumbled Draco. He slowly removed his hand from (Y/n’s) side and turned to face the others. His cheeks were decorated a dark red, even darker than before, and he was slightly embarrassed at how intimate he got with (Y/n) in front of their friends. Surely was worth it though, he thought, smiling to himself.

“To be fair, the dare was for us to kiss” (Y/n) said, shrugging. Blaise chuckled.

“Yes, I dared you two to kiss, not have a pg-13 make-out session in front of all of us” he said laughing. Daphne giggled from beside him.

“I mean for Merlin’s sake, get a room!” she said, still giggling. Pansy looked at her and gave her a sly look.

“You know, (Y/n), Daphne and I could always gather up the other girls for a day in Hogsmeade if you two do indeed need one” the raven-haired girl said winking. The other three bursted out laughing as Draco and (Y/n) mentally face-palmed.

“Very funny, Pansy” (Y/n) said, although deep down she was hoping she would be taking Pansy up on the offer.

After everyone settled down, the game continued for another few minutes before Blaise announced he’d be retiring to bed.

“I think I’ll join you, Blaise” Theodore said, following Blaise towards the dormitories, “big exam tomorrow. Need my beauty sleep.”

“You are such a nerd, Theodore” Daphne giggled. Theodore shot her a playful eye roll before the two boys disappeared into their dorms.

“We should probably get to bed too, Daph” Pansy said, “we barely studied at all and if we want any chance of being sharp, we better listen to Theo.”

“I guess he is the exam whizz” Daphne said, getting up and following Pansy to the girl’s dormitories, “you coming, (Y/n)?”

“I‘ll be there shortly, I want to study for just a bit more” said (Y/n), who was hoping Draco would join her. The girls shrugged and bid the two a goodnight before going to their dorm.

Once they were alone, Draco and (Y/n) sat in a tense silence. They both so desperately wanted to talk about the kiss, but neither knew how to bring it up. Finally, (Y/n) decided to break the silence.

“So…” she began, unsure how to bring it up. She turned to Draco to look at him, a smile on her face. Draco returned with a small smile of his own.

“So” he responded, “that was… fun.” He blushed as he awaited the (y/h/c) girl’s response.

“Definitely” she chuckled. They subconsciously scooted closer to each other, wanting to be as close to each other as possible.

“Um… look, (y/n)” Draco began, finally deciding to put down his walls and talk to her about how he felt, “I really like you. And not just in the way you think. I mean I really, really like you. I know that the kiss may have been just a dare to you, but to me, it was so much more. I just thought you should know that.”

Draco looked at (Y/n) with a look of want and nervousness on his face. His heart was beating twice the rate it normally was, and all he wanted was for her sweet touch to soothe him of his worries, and let him know she felt the same.

Like the angel she is, (Y/n) granted his wish, putting a gentle hand on his arm, rubbing gentle and calming circles on his shoulders. She smiled at him with a look of warmth and light in her eyes that could’ve illuminated the entire room.

“Dray…” she said, letting her other hand come up and stroke his cheek, “I feel the same way. I’ve always had a bit of a thing for you, I just never knew how you felt.”

Draco looked deeply into her (y/e/c) eyes, and leaned in to brush his lips against hers.

“Well, now you know” he smirked. With that, he closed the gap between their lips. Their mouths danced together in harmony and the two finally said everything they’d been holding in for the past few years. Their kiss continued for what seemed like hours, although neither teen seemed to mind. Once they finally pulled away, both had big cheeky grins and bright red cheeks.

“I guess all we needed was a push from Blaise” (Y/n) said giggling, “perhaps if he’d dared us sooner we wouldn’t have had to wait so long.” Draco chuckled.

“Well love, it certainly was worth the wait.”

#draco fluff #draco malfoy #draco malfoy fluff #draco malfoy smut #draco smut #harry potter #fanfic

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andreal831 · 3 months

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Do you think that Hayley/Elijah/Jackson could’ve potentially worked as a throuple? 👀

I actually laughed when I read this question. Not because I think it would be impossible but because I think it would be absolutely wild. Maybe if the show was being run by more interesting people we could have had a storyline like this. It would make sense.

I mean on one hand, we have Hayley and Elijah who are in love and on the other hand we have a forced marriage. If anyone was going to have a throuple, they were primed for it. I have said it before but I don't believe the unification magic is so aware that Hayley and Elijah couldn't have stayed in a relationship. Also, no one proposed the idea of a throuple. I feel like that would have worked for the magic aspect of it.

If it did work, Hayley would have had to be the one to introduce it, and you know she would have. Hayley, especially at that time, was definitely a 'have your cake and eat it too' kind of person. And that is not a critique on her. She knew what she wanted and she went for it. So why not bring up the idea to the men.

Elijah would have been on board. He had been pinning after Hayley for like two years at that point and would have jumped at the opportunity to be with her in any way possible. He also has lived so long that I don't think it would have been strange to him. I joke that I love jealous Elijah but we really didn't get many scenes where he was obviously jealous. I feel like he was just, essentially, too old for that teen drama. So it wouldn't have bothered him that Hayley was also with Jackson. Especially because it would mean he got to be with her as well. Jackson would have been resistant for a variety of reasons. I can see him saying "That's not how we do things." But there definitely was a power imbalance there so I could see him caving and agreeing, but resenting it. So not a healthy throuple.

However, overtime, I could see Jackson and Elijah finding common ground. People love to say the men are so different, but they really aren't. They just wear different clothes. Jackson is more like a Mikaelson than he or the fandom want to admit. Jackson treats his pack similar to how the Mikaelsons treat their family. I think this is something Elijah and he could bond over. They've both had to make tough decisions, even bad decisions, in order to protect the ones they love. They've both also messed up a lot. They also both cared for Hayley and Hope which would likely be the first common ground they could come to.

I also love to think over time, given the chance, Elijah and Jackson would become friends. I can just see Jackson talking about hunting or some nature thing and Elijah just casually asking questions, trying to pretend he's not that interested. We view Elijah as an uptight business man, but let's not forget he was originally a farmer/warrior from what is present day Virginia. Elijah is a country boy. I would love a scene where Jackson is surprised by Elijah's knowledge of farming or hunting and then Hayley walks into an intense discussion about crop yields or the best way to skin a deer.

To me, it wouldn't ever be a true throuple, it would more likely be an open relationship. I just never got queer vibes from Jackson, but who knows. But if the show had focused more on character development and family, and less on drama, we may have actually seen a begrudging friendship and mutual respect from the two men. And Hayley would have truly benefited from that. But we all know how little Julie likes to let women have control over their relationships.

Thanks for the ask! These are always so fun for me.

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lily-fics-11 · 4 months

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Gorgeous

//Robin Buckley Fic//

*Reposted from my old account (@lilyfics11)

*not beta read

Gorgeous

Inspired by Taylor Swift’s song Gorgeous

It’s Friday and you are having a movie night at Steve’s place with him and Robin.

You are sitting on the couch, Steve is in the recliner, and Robin is sprawled out on the floor, even though there is a spot next to you on the couch. Robin has been acting weird the past few days, but you don’t read too far into it. She’s probably just having a tough week.

“Hey guys?” You call over the volume of the tv. “Can you pause the movie for a second? I have to go to the bathroom.”

Steve pauses it. “Y/N, you are leaving us at quite the cliffhanger,,” he says with a sigh.

“I promise I’ll be right back!”

Once you are out of earshot Steve addresses Robin. “What’s been up with you Rob? You’re acting weird.”

Robin moves to sit up. She crosses her arms and furrows her brows. “It’s not a big deal.”

“Obviously it’s not just nothing. Talk to me Robin,” he sounds genuinely worried about his best friend. She glares for a moment but her expression turns to a look of defeat. She runs her hands through her hair.

“It’s Y/N,” Robin sighs.

“Y/N? What about her?” Steve questions, but he sounds intrigued.

“It’s… It’s just that… oh god I’m such a mess. What am I even doing? I’m going crazy, that’s what. The thing about Y/N, I just… I have feelings for her.”

“Oh. Wow. You do? What about Vickie?” Steve is very confused. For the longest time Robin wouldn’t stop talking about Vickie from band. But now that he’s thinking about it, that all stoped somewhat abruptly. And the whole Vickie timeline just so happens to line up with something he’s been reminded of.

“Vickie, yeah Vickie. She was, I don’t know, I guess you could call her a distraction. I just had all these, ya know, feelings. Feelings for Y/N. But Y/N had a girlfriend. So I had nothing to do with those feelings but try and distract myself. So I focused on Vicky. She’s pretty. Not gorgeous the way that Y/N is. But Vicky is nice, and we have things in common, so why not? But I couldn’t just transfer my feelings from Y/N to Vicky, no matter how hard I tried.” Robin gasped for air after her exasperated speech came out in one long breath.

Steve is still confused. “So let me get this straight. Y/N and her girlfriend broke up months ago. You know she likes girls. Why haven’t you made a move? Why are you getting all worked up about it now?”

“Well, the other day, in the hallway, someone was flirting with Y/N, and I can’t go through this again.” Robins words are filled with frustration.

“What are you waiting for Robin?” Steve is encouraging but there is a sense of urgency in what he is saying. “It’s now or never.”

“Uhhhhh!” Robin nearly yells but she knows that Y/N isn’t that far away and she could be back any second. But she doesn’t bother to check for Y/N before covering her face with her hands and saying “She’s so gorgeous, I can't say anything to her face, cause look at her face!”

Steve is in fact looking at your face. Stunned. You are back in the room and confused. Robin had a crush that she wouldn’t tell you about. You knew that Steve knew who, but was sworn to secrecy. Robin said “her” didn’t she? You had no idea Robin likes girls.

“Whose face?” You ask.

Robin uncovers her face, and looks up at you like a deer caught in headlights.

Steve stands up “I need to go to the kitchen!” He blurts out and nearly sprints out of the room.

You sit down next to Robin and repeat yourself “whose face, Robin?”

Robin leans back on her hands and closes her eyes. Still no answer.

“Come on Robin, I know something’s up with you.”

Robin opens her eyes and you are met with a piercing blue gaze. There is tension in the air.

“The thing is Y/N, there's nothing I hate more than what I can't have.”

You are shocked by the abruptness of her statement. Robin has never been a woman of such few words. “You are going to have to give me more than that.”

Robin sits back up and crosses her arms.

“You should think about the consequences! The consequences of your magnetic field being a little too strong. You're so gorgeous, I can't say anything to your face! I’ve been such a mess because of you, Y/N. You've practically ruined my life over the past few months. You’ve ruined my life, by not being mine. You make me so happy it turns back to sad. I’m so frustrated, Y/N. And no matter how I feel about you, I'm still so furious at you for making me feel this way.”

Robin flops down onto her back, covering her face back up with her hands.

Her voice is a little muffled through her hands, “first you had a girlfriend, and now someone else is trying to get with you, I don’t want to do this again.”

Ever since you met her, Robin has been the one person you always wanted, but also one person you thought you could never have.

“Robin,” your tone is calm compared to hers, “would you please look at me?”

Robin arms fall flat at her side onto the ground and she looks up with a pout on her face.

“I would never have bothered with anyone else if I knew you felt that way.” Her eyes widen as you continue “I didn’t even know you liked girls. I’ve had feelings for you since I met you at Scoops Ahoy over the summer. But I cared about you too much to say anything and ruin our friendship. I wanted to keep you as close to me as I could. I wouldn’t have risked that for anything.”

Robin sits up and she looks like there are a million thoughts racing through her head at once. It was rare that Robin Buckley had nothing to say.

You reach out both your hands to her and she hesitantly takes them. You start to lean forward towards her, and she shifts herself towards you. The two of you are looking into each other’s eyes, the blue in hers barely visible around her widend pupils. Both you and Robin are unsure of what to do in a situation that had previously only existed inside your imaginations. Your hearts are fluttering with anticipation.

“Robin?”

“Yeah?”

You can’t take it anymore and you close the gap between you, your lips falling into hers. Her lips are a little chapped but they felt better than anyone else’s ever have. But before you can get too ahead of yourself you remember where you are and you start to pull away. The whole world had momentarily disappeared.

“Wow.” Is all that Robin has to say.

“Wow.” You repeat back to her.

You pull yourselves away from each other, a little awkwardly, maintaining eye contact and wide smiles.

“Well would you look at that!” Steve calls from the kitchen.

He sounds relieved and you are too.

All three of you are laughing together, the previous tension gone.

~~~~~

I’m still new to sharing my writing so I would love to hear what you think:)

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amplifyme · 1 year

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Squirm

The X-Files. MSR. Angst. UST. Implied self-harm. Post-Ep: One Son. Teen and up. WC: 3,333. Read on AO3.

Tagging @today-in-fic

He doesn’t wait for an invitation to come in, just pushes through the open door and past her, coming to a stop in the casement opening between the living room and kitchen.

“Mulder, what are you doing? It’s almost midnight.”

She looks small and fragile in her fuzzy white robe, and his mind conjures up the image of her standing slouched and nearly broken with grief in a hospital hallway in Allentown, Pennsylvania, two years past. Ages ago. Countless missteps ago. But he’d held her in his arms back then, held her up, and she’d held him up, too. He doesn’t know if they can ever get back to that. But he wants to try. He can’t stand any more of this icy détente they’ve uncomfortably settled into.

“I know, I know. I’m sorry, but we need to talk.”

Her sigh is long and audible. “Mulder, it’s late and I’m on my way to bed. Can it wait?”

“Tomorrow’s Sunday. You can sleep in.” And he thinks to himself, It needs to happen now, before I lose my courage. Before it gets worse than it already is.

“Okay, fine,” she sighs a second time in defeat, her chin dipping down. “What is it?”

This is his fault; it almost always is. He’s done this to her. Ground her down and made her question everything she thought she knew. Whittled away at her until she exists now as a shadow, an almost unrecognizable sliver of what she was when she first came to him. All because he’s an idiot, because he doesn’t know how to care for delicate things. Because he’s never wanted to, before now.

“I came here to apologize,” he blurts. This is not how he planned it, rehearsing the words on the way over. So many things just leave his mouth without thought of the consequences. “I was wrong.”

“An apology for what?” she asks warily. Her eyes slide across his as she tightens the belt on her robe. It doesn’t escape him that he fucks up often enough that she needs clarification.

“For what I said to you at the Gunmen’s the last time we were there,” he tells her. “Before everything went to shit. What I said about you taking things personally. I shouldn’t have said that. It wasn’t fair.”

“Why?” she immediately challenges, crossing her arms tightly across her chest. “Why wasn’t it fair? I’d like to know.” He won’t get off easily this time, nor should he. She wants it all laid out in front of them, poked at and prodded, questioned and analyzed, until there’s nothing left to hide behind.

“Because I make everything personal, Scully, everything. And it’s wrong of me to be dismissive when you do the same.” He swallows past the lump lodged firmly in his throat. “I think you’re… there’s a very good chance you were right. I’m not sure anymore that Diana can be trusted. Not like I thought she could.”

“Is your change of heart based on the fact that she crawled back into the woodwork as soon as you failed to show up at El Rico? Where has she landed this time, Mulder? Do you even know?”

No, he doesn’t. Diana hasn’t bothered to return any of his calls; all of them made after he went back to the Gunmen’s and did a deep dive into the information they’d compiled on his former friend and lover. And it’s déjà vu all over again: he’s down in the basement where he belongs, and Diana is just gone.

But that’s not Scully’s problem and he won’t let this train change tracks. So he reminds her, “You were right there with me that night. I wasn’t going anywhere without you.” She opens her mouth, but he raises a hand to stop her. He’s not finished yet. “Regardless. I’m sorry I treated you badly and dismissed your concerns. You don’t deserve that.”

“Well,” she says after an interminable time. “That’s a start, anyway.”

He knows he should be grateful and just keep his mouth shut, but since when has common sense ever triumphed over the wisecracking corner of his brain. “You’re not going to make this easy on me, are you?”

“Easy, Mulder? Since when is anything ever easy with us?” She clearly has no patience for his misguided attempt at lightening the mood.

“All right. You’re right.” He runs a hand over his face. “Well, then, let’s just get this out in the open, okay? Acknowledge it, discuss it, and move on. What do you say?” He doesn’t have to wait long for a response, although when it comes it isn’t at all what he’s expecting.

“Have you been fucking her?” Her features are as sharp as her words, and he can’t escape the accusation of betrayal in her eyes.

“No!” He’s genuinely shocked that she would even think that. “God, no, Scully! I didn’t… I wouldn’t do that to you.“ He lifts his hands, pleading. “It’s not her I want.” He takes a step toward her, and her spine pulls straight as he hesitantly palms her shoulder and murmurs, “It’s not her I love.”

There. He’s said it. This second time feels less risky than his first, even coming as it does without benefit of opioids. That’s a good sign, right? That’s progress.

They lock eyes for long moments, playing chicken, neither daring to break the silence after his bold declaration. Finally, Scully wheels away and heads into the kitchen, yanking the tea kettle off the stove and filling it from the tap. She methodically goes about fetching mugs and a box of teabags from the cabinet. Mulder takes a few steps into the room, stopping at the table and laying one hand flat against the wood. He studies her from a safe distance and looks up quickly when she turns back to him.

“This is not about love, Mulder,” she announces. “This is about trust and where you choose to place it. It’s about respect.”

“You’re right, it is. And I’m sorry I fell short of that for you.” In for a penny, in for a pound, he thinks. “But this is also about whatever this… thing is… between us. I don’t know what you want from me anymore, Scully, or what you expect. Because you won’t tell me. You have to know whatever it is, it’s yours. It’s always been yours. But I don’t know what I’m supposed to do to fix it.”

“What do you want to do?” Her movements are jerky as she turns away to add a teabag to each mug.

Despite the emotional ground they’re uneasily treading, and his hyperaware sense of the danger inherent in pushing things with her right now, muscle memory refined over six years causes him to pull out a chair and take a seat. If Scully is making tea for them, then this is where he’s supposed to land: at her table and across from her usual spot. He scrubs his forehead and his tried-and-true method of deflection kicks in again just as the kettle begins to whistle and she yanks it from the stovetop.

“You want the Disney version or the two consenting adults version?”

“This is not a joke, Mulder.”

“No, it most certainly is not. So, answer me this one question, Scully. Do you love me?”

She swings around to face him, steaming mugs in hand, and he briefly wonders if she might launch them at him. “Why are you asking me that?”

“Because I want to know. It’s a simple question.”

She doesn’t answer him right away. Instead, she takes the time to set a mug in front of him first, and warily sits down across from him. “It isn’t simple, though, is it?” she finally says. “And it isn’t a question I should have to answer.”

“Why? You think it’s inappropriate of me to ask?”

“No, I think it’s unnecessary. You already know. You’ve known for a very long time; even before I did. But that knowledge didn’t stop you from… Well, you know what it didn’t stop you from doing.”

“No, I really don’t.”

“Correct me if I’m wrong, but didn’t you come here to apologize for your behavior?” Off his nod she says, “Then you already know, don’t you?”

But that’s not what he’s asking. And he knows that she knows it and is doing some deflection of her own. Jesus Christ, how did they manage to get this fucked up? “Are you gonna answer my question or not, Scully?”

“Why is it so important that I- “

“Because it fucking is!” He shoves away from the table and takes to his feet. The only part of Scully that moves are her eyes, tracking him on his way up and holding him there. “Because it would be nice to actually hear it, you know?” He can’t handle the way she’s looking at him, with her eyes all big and dark and bottomless, sucking him down into her depths. He could easily drown there. He turns away and raggedly confesses, “I can’t remember the last time anyone told me they loved me. You have your mom and your brothers and I’m sure you hear it all the time. But I don’t. And you won’t say it.”

He swings around to plead with her as the lead ball in his gut expands and makes it hard to breathe. He’s panting now and can’t seem to stop. His right hand lifts and presses against his chest, over his heart. He’s certain he’s just going to die. Crumple right here on Scully’s immaculately clean kitchen floor. “Sometimes I think I’ve lost my mind and I’m deep in a psychotic break and imagining things that aren’t there. If feels like the walls are closing in on me and there’s no escape. Sometimes I don’t know what’s real or what I should believe. I don’t know what to do.”

“You can start by sitting down.”

“What?” he gasps as she gets up and heads back to the cabinets. This time she pulls out two squat glasses.

“Sit down, Mulder, before you completely fall apart.” So, he does. Because she’s told him to and because she’s right. Usually with this amount of adrenaline pumping through him, he can find some slightly insane way to disperse a little of it. Like jumping off a bridge onto a moving train, for example. Or breaking into a top-secret air base. Or kicking down a door. Or any number of other incredibly stupid things. But he can’t do any of that right now. And he wouldn’t do that to Scully anyway.

“Now breathe,” she says very calmly. “Deep breaths.” Before he realizes what’s happening, she’s back sitting across from him, pouring out two hefty shots of whisky and pushing one of them his way.

“Drink.”

“Scully, I don’t -”

“Shut up and drink it, Mulder.” Her tone leaves no room for argument.

“Okay,” he mouths. He screws his eyes shut, tips his head back, and throws it all down his gullet. It burns, god but it burns, all the way across the back of his tongue and down his throat and settles into a glowing ember deep in his belly. He chokes out a cough and forces his eyes open, blinking against the stinging tears gathering there.

“Jesus, Scully, are you trying to kill me?” He looks over just as she takes a delicate sip of her own drink.

“There are three fully loaded weapons in this apartment. If I intended to kill you, I wouldn’t waste this fine Irish whisky on you beforehand.” She reaches and pats his forearm, like she’s soothing a grumpy toddler, and announces, “We have to stop doing this to each other, Mulder.”

He folds both arms on the table and hangs his head, studies his trembling hands, and gives voice to an earlier thought as he wearily shakes his head. “We’re so fucked up.”

“Speak for yourself.”

“No,” he retorts, lifting his eyes and looking over at her. He’s pointing an accusing finger at her that he doesn’t recall cocking. “No, don’t talk like I’m the only one who’s fucked up here.” He is suddenly aware that his tongue is fuzzy and feels larger in his mouth than it should. He always has been a cheap drunk. “You’re just as fucked up as me, Scully.”

He reaches for the bottle and splashes another, narrower shot into his glass. He downs this one without preparation or build up and looks over to find her watching him. Her features mimic the look he usually sees when she’s trying to process one of his more outlandish theories. The one that’s accompanied by a tight little smirk. He wants to kiss that smirk right off her face. More than anything.

“I don’t want to have any more regrets, Scully. I don’t want to lose the chance to love you the way I want to, the way you deserve. Just tell me what I have to do.” He punctuates his request with a third shot. This one doesn’t creep up on him like the first two have. It’s more like one second he’s pretty much okay, but the next he most definitely is not. He hasn’t been this buzzed, this quickly, in a long time. Scully pulls the bottle over to her side of the table and caps it. Probably for the best, he blearily decides.

“When’s the last time you slept, Mulder?”

There she goes again, throwing nonsensical questions at him from right field. He played right field in high school. It takes a good arm. “I dunno. When did we get back from Florida; two days ago? I slept that night,” he answers, and his mouth doesn’t move quite enough to enunciate properly. He blames it on his fat tongue and the whisky. Did she intend to get him drunk? He wouldn’t put it past her. So he asks.

“You tryin’ to get me drunk, Scully? You don’t have to do that if you want to take advantage of me. Despite your protests, I’m actually pretty easy.”

“In that respect, I have no doubt,�� she responds smartly. “But I have no intention of taking advantage of you tonight.”

“Ah, come on. You can admit it to me. I won’t tell anybody.”

“My only intent is to put you to bed so we can both get some badly needed sleep.” He can imagine the look he’s presenting her. He felt his eyes widen and his jaw drop open. “Not with you in my bed, Mulder. I’m assuming you drove over?”

“Yeah,” he sheepishly admits.

“Then you have no business driving. The couch is yours tonight. There’s a new toothbrush in the cabinet under the bathroom sink. Feel free to use it. I’ll make up the couch for you.”

That’s it, then? They’re not going to hash this out tonight, once and for all?

“But, Scully,” he begins as she leaves the table and heads for the linen closet in the hallway.

She stops and swings back around to him. Her little fists rest at her hips, knuckles digging into the curvy flesh there. “Yes, Mulder, I do love you. There, now I’ve said it. It might be nice to hear, but it doesn’t solve our problems, does it?”

“Do you mean it?”

“Oh, Mulder, of course I do. I’ll meet you in the living room in five, okay?” And then she disappears around the bend.

He ponders his choices for a few seconds, the best he can, and decides to follow Scully’s lead. After all, he can be a good boy, and easily obedient when he wants to be. So he does as he’s been told for the first time since the last time she ordered him around. He sways in his chair a little and then folds in half and carefully unties his sneakers and toes them off. He heads for the short hallway in the opposite direction of the way she went, and they pass like two ships in the night, Scully’s arms full of bedclothes and a pillow.

He makes it back to the living room in under five, breath minty fresh, face scrubbed clean, bladder emptied. He considered shedding his jeans and tee in the can but decided against it. Bad enough he’s shouldered her with taking care of his drunk and maudlin, half-crazed and anxious self tonight. She shouldn’t have to put up with him in nothing but his boxers and socks on top of that. Somehow his belt has ended up slung around his neck, though, and he fakes hanging himself when Scully glances up at him from bed-making duty, gathering both ends of the leather in a fist and cocking his head to the side, tongue lolling out. He adds sound effects, too, so she’ll get the whole picture.

“Don’t give me any ideas, Mulder.” She punches the pillow for emphasis. He inspects her work and nods approvingly. She’s created a fine little nest for him. There’s even a tall glass of water and a bottle of Tylenol waiting for him on the coffee table.

She straightens and turns to face him and he’s feeling suddenly shy and a little bit ashamed. This late-night visit hasn’t gone down anything like the way he thought it would. He buys himself a few seconds, dropping his gaze and absently scratching his belly. He sneaks a peek at her from the tops of his eyes. “Would it do any good to apologize?”

“You’ve done it once already. That’s enough for tonight,” she proclaims.

“Because I really am sorry, Scully. For makin’ you doubt how important you are to me.”

“I don't doubt that. I just wish your methods of expressing it were a little less…” She circles an open hand in the air, searching for the right words, he guesses.

“Messy?” he offers. “Thoughtless. Boneheaded. Selfish. Stupid,” he finishes. “Take your pick.”

“All of the above,” she decides. But the corners of her mouth have lifted just the tiniest bit and he’s momentarily overwhelmed by the depth of her generosity when it comes to him and his foolish ways. “C’mere, Mulder, I’ll tuck you in.”

He carefully weaves his way around the coffee table and his belt hits the floor. He sits down and she squats and pulls off his socks and tosses them over her shoulder. Another few positional adjustments later and he’s under the blanket, his heavy, fuzzy head sinking into the feather pillow beneath him. She perches on the edge of the couch and smooths the soft blanket over his chest.

“Do you think you’ll need to vomit? I can grab a trash can for you, so you don’t have to worry about making it to the bathroom in time.”

He smiles up at her and thinks about how nice it would be to close his eyes while she continues to gently pet him. And then he does close them. “M’fine, Scully. I can hol’ my liquor.” Her snort of laughter shocks his eyes back open, and he has to blink a few times before her face comes into focus.

“Yeah, I can see that.”

Something she’d said to him earlier resurfaces in his head and he echoes the words back at her as his eyes slip shut again. “We gotta stop doin’ this to each other.”

“We’ll figure it out,” she says. “But not tonight. Go to sleep, Mulder.” And then she’s gone from his side. And as he begins to sink into what will be a rare dreamless sleep, he can hear her putting mugs and glasses in the kitchen sink and turning out lights, putting her home to bed, just like she has with him. And he thinks that he loves her so much that he’ll never find the perfect way to show her. He thinks that this unique alchemy, composed of the exquisite pleasures and deepest pain that loving her brings him, makes him feel the most alive that he has ever been.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Notes:

So in the midst of working on my passion project, that elusive One Breath fic, the muse approached me bearing a silver platter on which a tiny seed lay. “Here,” she whispered in my ear. “Let’s take a minute and plant this one, see what grows.”

I have no shame. I am her bitch, now and forever, world without end. I will always do her bidding.

Till next time…

#the x-files fanfic #msr #squirm #mine

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lilyfics11 · 4 months

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//Robin Buckley Fic//

*not beta read

Gorgeous

Inspired by Taylor Swift’s song Gorgeous

It’s Friday and you are having a movie night at Steve’s place with him and Robin.

“Hey guys?” You call over the volume of the tv. “Can you pause the movie for a second? I have to go to the bathroom.”

Steve pauses it. “Y/N, you are leaving us at quite the cliffhanger,,” he says with a sigh.

“I promise I’ll be right back!”

Once you are out of earshot Steve addresses Robin. “What’s been up with you Rob? You’re acting weird.”

Robin moves to sit up. She crosses her arms and furrows her brows. “It’s not a big deal.”

“It’s Y/N,” Robin sighs.

“Y/N? What about her?” Steve questions, but he sounds intrigued.

“It’s… It’s just that… oh god I’m such a mess. What am I even doing? I’m going crazy, that’s what. The thing about Y/N, I just… I have feelings for her.”

“Well, the other day, in the hallway, someone was flirting with Y/N, and I can’t go through this again.” Robins words are filled with frustration.

“What are you waiting for Robin?” Steve is encouraging but there is a sense of urgency in what he is saying. “It’s now or never.”

“Whose face?” You ask.

Robin uncovers her face, and looks up at you like a deer caught in headlights.

Steve stands up “I need to go to the kitchen!” He blurts out and nearly sprints out of the room.

You sit down next to Robin and repeat yourself “whose face, Robin?”

Robin leans back on her hands and closes her eyes. Still no answer.

“Come on Robin, I know something’s up with you.”

Robin opens her eyes and you are met with a piercing blue gaze. There is tension in the air.

“The thing is Y/N, there's nothing I hate more than what I can't have.”

You are shocked by the abruptness of her statement. Robin has never been a woman of such few words. “You are going to have to give me more than that.”

Robin sits back up and crosses her arms.

Robin flops down onto her back, covering her face back up with her hands.

Her voice is a little muffled through her hands, “first you had a girlfriend, and now someone else is trying to get with you, I don’t want to do this again.”

Ever since you met her, Robin has been the one person you always wanted, but also one person you thought you could never have.

“Robin,” your tone is calm compared to hers, “would you please look at me?”

Robin arms fall flat at her side onto the ground and she looks up with a pout on her face.

Robin sits up and she looks like there are a million thoughts racing through her head at once. It was rare that Robin Buckley had nothing to say.

“Robin?”

“Yeah?”

“Wow.” Is all that Robin has to say.

“Wow.” You repeat back to her.

You pull yourselves away from each other, a little awkwardly, maintaining eye contact and wide smiles.

“Well would you look at that!” Steve calls from the kitchen.

He sounds relieved and you are too.

All three of you are laughing together, the previous tension gone.

~~~~~

I’m still new to sharing my writing so I would love to hear what you think:)

#robin buckley x you #robin buckley x y/n #robin buckley x fem!reader #robin buckley angst x female reader #robin buckley angst #robin buckley fluff x female reader #robin buckley x female reader #robin buckley fanfic #robin buckley imagine #robin buckley fluff #robin buckley #robin buckley x reader #robin buckley drabble #lilyfics11

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lorrainel456 · 1 year

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What Is this new sensation?

Hiya, this is my first post of writing fanfic in tumbler, I hope I don't disappoint you guys, and I hope you guys like it, and I can take in requests it's just that I may not be able to write some people, the only people I can write about are Edgar, Aesop, and Joseph only those three, anyway have a fun time reading^^

"When I mean I never want to talk about my talent, I mean I never want to talk about it," you say to the curious perfumer as she opens her mouth to protest "no means no vera.." you cut her off abruptly " y/n come on not even a little hint on why and how your talent ended up with singing?" you stare at her mentally telling her that your about to just stand up and leave, she looked at you one last time and gives up "fine I won't force you, I'll just go bother someone else then" you stare at the figure walking away from you and sigh a sigh of relief, the reason you didn't wanna tell anyone in the manner is that it's too traumatic for you to even hold the conversation without crying and shaking, you thought of how you could have been if you weren't so foolish to have fallen for an unfaithful married man, he used you and took so much money from you. You sigh and stand up walking to where there are fewer people in a room, thinking about going to the garden, you walk to the hallway that takes you to the place, marble flooring mixed with white walls with the occasional tall white pillars that seem to reach the tall ceiling full of chandeliers that use candles for lighting the beautiful hallway,

you walk a slower pace admiring the common hallway and spin around using your heel, moments like these take you back to when you felt young and free.

Finally reaching the glass door that leads to the garden, you open the door and immediately smell the fresh air and flowers, the sight of many different flowers gives a smile to your complexion as you slowly walk towards a blooming burgundy rose that has yet to bloom, you graze its delicate petals as you wonder when it will bloom.

"Can you move, I'm painting the scene and you're ruining it you loon."

You turn around to see a boy wearing a red beret and a red shawl

(I don't know if I should use a shawl or a cape so I'm going with a shawl )

You stare at them for a few seconds and start to panic, you move out of the way and go near the individual that's painting the scene before him

"I'm sorry for blocking your view but, you could at least be nicer about it" you slightly frown

"you were blocking my way, why should I need to be nicer about it when a person is wasting my precious time"

You look at the person with slight disdain plastered on your face

"wow- I seriously didn't mean to block your view, I'm sorry-" you express to the man, he stayed silent as you sit down on the grassy ground next to the stool he was sitting on and stayed quiet while watching the individual paint with the calming breeze hitting you and him.

He finishes his painting and puts down his brush and paint tray while examining the masterpiece he had just created, he lowers his head and speaks

"Edgar Valden, the painter, nice to formally meet you"

He raised his head and looked at you with a straight face as you spoke up as well

"f/n l/n, singer, it was nice meeting you as well-"

You said sarcastically with a slight smile on your face.

"Why did you stay and not leave like the others when I start being mean to you" he asks with curiosity

"that's a weird question- but uh, I guess it was pretty calming watching you work on that painting of yours, you looked so focused that I wanted to stay and watch" you say looking up at him, he looks at you with an amused face and stayed silent .

He stands up and takes his things to leave, and without a word, he just leaves you alone in the garden, the silence yet again kicking in with a sense of loneliness.

You stayed in the garden till it was night, it was calming to have enjoyed the night in the garden, but alas it's getting close to midnight and you need to rest, you had a match tomorrow that you want to persist, you walk to your room thinking about Edgar, he's not much of a talker and not used to having many companions, although he was calming to be with, and I'll have to say he does have looks ' you stop thinking about it once you got into your room, after getting ready for the night you finally lie on your bed after the stay in the garden, your eyes start to close by itself and you drift into the world of respite.

The morning sun shone through the cracks of your curtain creating a beautiful ambiance, you stir awake and sat up on your bed getting up to get ready for your match taking your bath swiftly, you decided to use one of the costumes miss nightingale gave you, it was an uncomplicated costume, though it was a bit harder to breathe in because of the tight corset.

You can choose an outfit for yourself don't worry, just make sure you imagine it with a corset~

After you have put on the attire, you simply take your items, a rose brooch for your talent and skill to be utilized, you walk out of your room and quickly stand at the lobby doors, you open them and dart your eyes to the painter you had just gotten to know of yesterday, they stopped what they were doing and glanced your way locking your eyes with his blue ones, you smiled at him as he looked away resting his head on his hand.

You finally noticed your other teammates consisting of the seer and the perfumer, you decided to sit next to eli since you already knew him a decent amount,

"Oh n/n!!" Eli calls out to you happy to let you sit next to him, you smile and continue. Your way to your chosen seat,

"hiya, Eli its been a whole day without seeing you!" you sit down as you giggle.

"same goes for you y/n. I missed you and your voice" he says as he smiles at you.

You and Eli conversed as you waited for the match to start. after the hunter was ready the match began, the map was situated at the sacred heart hospital, you run over to a cipher and started to decode it concentrating well enough to not mess up the decoding, you put in "cipher is 76% complete" in the radio and continued.

Suddenly the perfumer got hit by the hunter from across the map, your cipher almost finished but deciding to use your skill.

You sang and gave a speed boost to vera exposing your location to the hunter.

You hear from the radio a "thank you.." from the perfumer.

As your skill ran out of time you see that the perfumer was knocked out and was quickly put on a chair, you hear the seer send in "stay put im coming" taking it as a sign for me to keep on decoding.

Not long after decoding the last few ciphers only having one cipher to finish up you yet again see that the seer was also knocked out, you then hear the painter announce on the radio that the last cipher was primed and ready to let us open the exit gates, as vera was sent off you ran all the way to save the seer as the painter was opening the gate, you waited for an opportunity to help the seer to no avail, out of nowhere Edgar came up and placed a painting to distract the hunter,

You then take the advantage to free up Eli and succeeded, you and Eli ran towards the exit where Edgar was waiting with an already put-down painting just in case the hunter was close behind us, and close he was.

Joseph swung his sword at Eli and knocked him out " don't rescue me!" he says, you hesitate on running away but you did anyways

(Edgars point of view)

I wait at the exit gate with the painting already set down for the hunter to stop chasing them for a bit to provide more time to reach the exit, suddenly I see that the seer was taken down, I run towards them to help the seer only to have found out it was dangerous to try and save the seer now, I turn back and see the singer at the exit waiting when suddenly Joseph appeared behind me and hit me for the first time, y/n used her skill to speed me up and ran behind me to take the hit and fell down instantly.

"don't save me" I look at her and say "are you and idiot? You won't win the match either way!!" she stayed silent and was put in a rocket chair.

"How stupid can this individual be sacrificing themselves for a person that isn't that wounded..." he says as he ran to the exit with no choice and escapes.

(back to your point of view a few hours later)

You wake up in a beautifully well-decorated room that you don't recognize at all, you move your head to look around the room confused, and noticed the paintings scattered in it, though one caught your eye, the painting Edgar made the first time you two met, you then realized that this was his room .

The door opens revealing the man that owns the room.

"you finally woke up, you got hit pretty bad, and so did the others..." he says as he looked at you with a straight face

"oh... but why am I here in your room? Shouldn't I be in Emily's room?" you ask, he looks away as he walks toward one of his unfinished paintings and picked up his paint tray And brush,

"she didn't have any more space so i-" he cut off himself and hesitated on continuing the sentence, "i- offered to let you use my room to rest... I owe you for using your last skill on me to run to the exit and now you owe me as well so that makes us even.." he says looking to the side with a flustered expression. He then quickly turn his head around and said,

"WHY WOULD YOU EVEN DO THAT, YOU COULD HAVE RAN AND ESCAPED WITH ME-!!"

You look at him shocked at how he cared so much as your sweat dropped one by one "I uhh- sorry?" you speak not knowing what to say. He looks at you with discontent as you feel the daggers being stabbed through you by his glare.

"Listen, I don't know what to say except sorry, I didn't know that you cared this much for me.." you say looking over to the side with a slight blush appearing on the tips of your ears

"well... At least you are fine now, be careful next time," he says as he turns his head back to the painting noticing he doesn't have the motivation to, "I will don't worry" you tell him.

The room fell silent for a couple of minutes and seemed to have an awkward atmosphere so you decided to talk to him asking "so... Your talent were you born with it or did you have to practice and learn?" you ask him and he turns his head to the side and looks at you, "talents are something you're born with. Idiot " he says unimpressed as you start to panic "... I was born with it, if only I knew the only thing this can get me is people using me I would have just wanted to not have been born into my family..." he said slowly glanced down to his paintbrush on his hand.

You look at him with a caring gaze as you move closer to the edge of his bed to sit down "don't let them get to you, Edgar it's your talent don't let them use it to their advantage in life" you declared. He slowly looks at you with a disguised shocked look on his complexion. "what about your talent?" he asks you

"oh, I don't think of it as a talent, more so like a hobby," you say as he looked away from you and continues to paint his unfinished painting "you shouldn't say that y/n, your so-called 'hobby' is more of a talent you know," he speaks up "No no! It is just a hobby, I could never be able to impress anyone with this.." you spoke down to yourself and hide your growing pain "if you say that your singing is just a hobby your basically telling me that my painting is a hobby as well" he declares "your talent is beautiful y/n, you should know that," he says as he's painting.

You look at him your face red as a tomato glad he's concentrated on his canvas.

A minute passed and you decided to stand up and walk over to him, he noticed this but kept on painting. You then wrap your arms around him as you look closer at his painting noticing his hand had stopped moving "what are you doing? " he questions "just giving you a hug as a thank you, has anyone ever told you your very huggable" you say beaming "no. I've never been hugged that much.." he stated "well now you get hugs from me" you say nuzzling onto his shoulder "ah.."is all he said.

You let go of him after 3 minutes of hugging him and started to very slowly walk to the door "well then, thank you for taking care of me and letting me use your bed but i better go, I wouldn't want to disturb you any more than I already have " you say as you turn around and put your hand on the doorknob "could we meet up again in the garden sometime, I would like to paint you as well ... Y/n..." he asks. You turned your head and smiled " oh of course you can" you said, after a split second you were finally out of the room.

You blushed and sped walked to your room and closed your door, you slid your back till you sat down on the floor

You wrap your arms around your legs and hit your head on your knees multiple times "WHY DID I DO THAT-" you state to yourself

(Edgar's point of view )

She closed the door and I stopped doing whatever I did "she.." I turn red reminiscing the feeling of her hugging me "what is this feeling.." I said out loud only to want to yearn more for her touch "what is happening to me-" I put my stuff aside as I bury my face in my hands frustrated.

#edgar valden x reader #idv painter #identity v #edgar valden #edgar valden imagine #painter x reader #fanfic #x reader #reader insert #y/n x character

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makeusfly · 1 year

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More Light Than Heat, Chapter 21

No, I Won’t Have to Say Anything

previous chapter

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Everything was fine.

Candace was on her honeymoon. His parents had gone on their own romantic getaway. And Isabella was…

Isabella was leaving. No, that wasn’t fair. Isabella was going back to school, like she was always supposed to. And really, it was his own fault that this was the first year he didn’t get to drive her, didn’t get those two hours of analyzing all their recent reads and pretending to fight over the radio until she plugged her phone into the AUX and blasted her current favorite Taylor Swift song on repeat.

She wasn’t gone yet - her car was still in the driveway.

He turned a page of the newspaper.

Everything was fine.

If you’d asked him, two months ago, how he would feel if he found out his brother and Isabella were actually best as friends - that Isabella, in fact, didn’t want anything else - he wouldn’t have been able to answer the question. Which meant that Past Ferb and Present Ferb actually had a lot in common.

Hey Ferb.

He clenched the newsprint in his fist. Shuffled in his seat.

Ferb?

Relieved, he might have guessed. Relieved, he could have lived with, would have made sense to him.

Was he…was he sad about this?

One thing for sure: he was fucking confused.

“Bro!”

Shaking himself out of his head, he loosened his grip on the paper and lowered it into his lap. He smiled apologetically at Phineas.

“You okay, dude?”

He shook his head and blinked a couple times to reset, then gave his brother an affirmative smile. Unconvinced, Phineas glanced past him, through the open window. There was a split second when Ferb followed his gaze, when he winced, and then he thanked all the Powers that Be that Phineas had never been as good at reading Ferb as Ferb was at reading Phineas.

“How long have you been in love with Isabella?”

There was indignation in the inevitability. Of course his brother was going to see it sooner or later. Why did it have to be now ? He gripped the paper so tightly that he ripped it and cleared his throat.

“Why would you even-”

“Oh my god, you are .”

Phineas was math-smart, science-smart, average in the social sciences and abysmal at people-reading. He asked Ferb a lot of questions because Ferb was the man with answers - or he was, once upon a time.

Today was not his best day. Nothing made sense.

“Why would you ask if you didn’t think-”

“Candace got me thinking about it, and I thought maybe you liked her, because you might not tell me about a new crush but you would’ve told me you were in love but oh my god . Why didn’t you-”

“Phineas,” he tried, voice low and even as he tried to coax his brother’s roller coaster of thought to a halt.

“Of course you didn’t tell me!” Phineas smacked his palm against his forehead. “If you’d said anything, I never would’ve dated her, and–” Phineas paused. When he started up again, his voice was quieter, slower, less shrill. “Oh, Ferb. You just want her to be happy.”

The silence following this epiphany was somehow worse than the word vomit.

“Ferb,” Phineas said, finally, his voice just this side of pleading. “You deserve to get what you want too.”

Ferb shook his head.

“Obviously what she wants is important. But now you know: she doesn’t want me!”

“But that doesn’t automatically mean she wants me! ”

He hadn’t known that was what was bothering him until the words burst from his larynx, but now it made perfect sense. How many times had he coveted Isabella’s attention, her affection, only to remind himself that no. She wanted Phineas. And he couldn’t even blame her for it - his brother was his favorite person too. It was almost a consolation - she didn’t want him simply because he wasn’t Phineas.

But no. She didn’t want Phineas either. He just fell short on his own merit.

“Ferb.” His brother’s tone caught like a hook, pulling him out of his own head. “I think you’re doing it again.”

He raised an eyebrow.

“You’re assuming what she wants. Without asking.”

He blinked.

Her car was still in the driveway.

“You pushed for so long for her and I to get together…does she even realize you’re an option?”

Her car was still in the driveway .

“And like…not to put too fine a point on the thing, but you had a hard enough time this summer when you thought she was dating me . And if she and I were together…I’m just saying: if she dates someone else, someone who doesn’t get us, things will change. We won’t lose her, but things would definitely be different .”

Her car…

“Are you really not even going to try ?”

Bloody hell .

He tossed the newspaper aside, catapulting himself from the armchair, just registering Phineas raising both arms in triumph. He flew across the room, tore the front door open, and froze.

Isabella’s car was still in the driveway. Isabella was on the step in front of him.

“Hi,” she giggled, breathlessly. “Whatcha doin’?”

Once upon a time it had been her go-to opener. Nowadays, she only asked when she felt awkward and wasn’t sure what to say next.

Things changed.

He opened his mouth to answer her but the spoken word, never his friend at the best of times, completely failed him.

Isabella, as ever, paused so he had the opportunity, only speaking when she saw the width of his eyes, the exact angle of his pursed lips, and knew he needed her to take the lead.

“I was just thinking…” She met his eyes unabashed, but little things gave away her nervousness. The way she twisted her foot as if grinding a cigarette into the pavement. The way she held her hands behind her back so she could fidget without anyone seeing it. The way she paused, just a second, and bit her lip before continuing. “I spent all summer pretending to want something I didn’t, but if I leave now, I may well spend the rest of my life pretending not to want something I do. And Ferb…maybe you don’t want the same thing and maybe I’m embarrassing myself, but that’s fine, because…because I’m not going to lose you, either way. I trust you, and I trust our friendship, but it’s not the only thing I want and at least I’ll know , you know?”

Ferb did not know. This was a very frustrating day.

Time slowed down around him as the pieces started to come together. If she was saying what he thought she was saying…

In slow motion, he watched her hands appear from behind her, balled into fists, watched her lean forward on her tiptoes, and then he didn’t have to wonder what she was saying because she kissed him about it.

And Ferb, world-famous Man of Action, couldn’t bring himself to move.

It lasted forever and was over in a blink. She pulled back and stared, wide-eyed, searching his face.

Ferb stared back.

“I’m sorry,” she said finally, stepping carefully back down the front step. He watched her cross the street, watched her going into her house.

“Uh…Ferb?”

He blinked, the world coming back into focus as time flew forward, finally catching up with him.

“You didn’t make it very far.”

“She…” he stammered. “She was here.”

“And?”

“She kissed me.”

“Yes! ”

Except…no. Not yes. Because when it mattered most, he froze.

She came outside then, backpack slung over her shoulder, pointedly not looking in his direction as she slid into her driver’s seat.

Fuck .

Ferb finally, finally moved.

The engine was rumbling to a start as he slid to a stop next to her window. It was such a short sprint, and yet, he was gasping for air as she rolled her window down.

“No, you’re right.” Her eyes were red and - how had he fucked up this badly? “I shouldn’t have just- I should have asked. I’m-”

“Ask.”

Her frown shifted, from sad to confused, as she tapped the gear shift absent-mindedly.

“You were right, Isabella,” he said finally, and didn’t her name in his mouth just taste like sugar and summer and her lips on his. “I didn’t listen when you told me what you wanted, but you never asked me either. So ask .”

He was reminded briefly of Buford earlier that summer, of the watery smile that surfaced when he reminded her that he wouldn’t pick on her for no reason, when he reminded her of who she was and what she was capable of. A ghost of that smile graced her features now.

“What do you want Ferb?” she asked, the tone of someone who already knew the answer.

“You,” he breathed, just in case. He cradled her cheek in his hand and leaned forward. “Always you.”

And he pressed his lips firmly against hers.

His brain shut off again, but this time, he listened to the rest of him. Metal pressed into his chest, and he stepped back. She pulled away, and he reached around the car door to grip her wrist and tug her past it. She pressed against the nape of his neck and he went with her, wrapping his arms around her waist, folding her into his chest, and tasting her lips again.

When his brain started working again, he wouldn’t have been surprised if part of him felt wrong, still convinced he was betraying his brother, but it didn’t. She was exactly where she belonged.

“Are you shitting me?”

It was the absolute last thing he had expected her to say as they broke apart, and he laughed. “What’s wrong, love?”

“I wasted this whole summer pretending to date your brother when we could have been doing that ?”

He chuckled, low and gruff, as he rested his forehead against hers. “We have the rest of our lives to make up for it.”

“I have to go to school,” she whined. “It’ll be a month before-”

“When’s your next day off?”

“What?”

He inhaled the scent of her, letting his eyes flutter closed briefly. “Which day do you have less than a million things to do?”

“Thursday,” she answered. “But-”

“I’ll come see you.”

“Ferb-”

“We’ll make this work,” he promised.

She pulled away so she could look into his eyes but her hands stayed where they were.

She sighed, leaning against his shirt. “Okay.” She opened the car door behind her without looking at it and pressed another brief kiss to his lips. “I’ll see you Thursday.”

Another kiss, this time through the open window. “Thursday,” he echoed.

He let her drive away - as if he could have done anything else but wait until she was truly gone - before he recrossed the street and let himself back into his house. Phineas had taken up his spot on the armchair, the newspaper dutifully opened in his lap even though it was obvious he hadn’t been reading it.

“So…got the girl?”

Ferb didn’t even care that his little brother must have been spying on him, didn’t point out that the newspaper was upside down. He just grinned and nodded. Phineas smiled back, but it didn’t last long.

“Umm…Ferb?”

He raised an eyebrow.

“How are we going to explain this one to Mom and Dad?”

next chapter

#More Light Than Heat #Phineas and Ferb #Phineas and Ferb fanfic #Ferbella #Ferbella fanfiction #my writing

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vaicomcas · 2 years

Note

Hi again. It's the anon who asked for fic recs. :) To answer your question first, I would love it as long as it's Castiel-centric (don't really mind whether there's shipping or not as long as the story is good and Cas is being his awesome self) though currently I'm craving happy fics only because the Nov 5 stuff make me sad with how the story ended for Cas (definitely adding your fic in my To-Read list for better days though). I wanna read him getting the happiness and love he deserves.

One of the things that drew me to his character (the very first fics that I've read that accidentally got me into the fandom were finale fix-its) was reading about this millenia old being not knowing the form his happiness could possibly take and then capitalizing on his deal with an incomprehensible primordial entity that's less of a deal and more of a curse to save the man he loves. My personal interpretation for that had always been that the happiness comes from being able to speak his truth and at the same time knowing that he'd get to ensure that his loved one lives on. Because if happiness is just solely in the being, the deal would have been triggered even before that (since nothing has essentially changed with his being) and it can't be just in the saying (because he'd have to consider how his words are received). Not to mention that it should have been impossible for him to find happiness in that moment because the knowledge of the deal hangs over his head and yet he was able to do so and for a purpose. That's kinda amazing so I kept reading more (just those fixits at first and then I just diverged) Most of them were Destiel and I did enjoy the ones that gave Cas a happy ending. The more I read though, the more I noticed that for a lot of Destiel fics, despite being written with obvious fondness with Castiel's character, his feelings and relationships to other characters become secondary to whatever comfort he can provide to address Dean and his issues. For example, I don't understand it when Jack would bring Cas back because of Dean. Isn't he Cas' son and wouldn't it make more sense if he was more protective over him and would attempt to do so regardless? (which is how I'm choosing to interpret why Cas was in heaven in the finale but he never showed up again? Haha don't actually know how to separate what really happened or not since I really haven't watched a single episode and could only assume canon events from the commonalities in canon divergent fics)

I'm sorry that this got long but existing in the fringes of the fandom without technically being in it means I don't have many people to talk about this with. :)

Oh OK so now I have two I think you may like. They are both actually a bit destiel but just in the background.

The love story of the Runner up (its about Cas having a relationship with a normal well adjusted kind man)

Pretend you are going to miss me (it's post-cannon and all the angels are resurrected and it's from Balthazar's perspective but still all about Castiel and it's also very angel centric which is refreshing)

In addition I enjoyed most of Northern Sparrow's fics (back in the days when I can still enjoy destiel. She does give Cas proper credit for how amazing he is and there is a lot of tear jerking moments but they all have happy endings. The two I liked best were Forgotten and The most important thing. I can't read them anymore because there is too much Dean in them but if it doesn't bother you then they are very good stories.

Thanks for reaching out and if you end up liking these I'd love to hear about it, but quite OK if not, like I said fics are so personal.

And no Jack didn't bring Cas back because of Dean, if that's in some fic then I'm glad I didn't read it. Cas is in heaven but never showed up again because the writer didn't care about Cas and once he was sacrificed he was only given an afterthought of a line from Bobby that he was in heaven. Dean never even asked Jack to bring Cas back.

If you don't want to watch the show I don't blame you. You can look up the plotlines in superwiki if the fics get confusing.

And thank you for defending Castiel's own awesomeness despite never having even seen the show.

#ask #justice for castiel

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heliarosewrites · 1 year

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Chapter 16 - Brain Damage

Ever since you had entered the training rooms and Wanda had been brought to you, your powers had bloomed. Being in her presence made you power somehow stronger. You never used them unless to show Wanda how to do certain trick. She was inexperienced, but maybe the strongest wielder you had ever met. A theory you had made was that her magic rubbed off at you. Similar to the way you could sense other people wielding their power, like Frigga and Loki.

The word Gyðja reappeared in your mind several times over the last weeks. Why? You had no clue.

It had been six weeks since Loki had left you. And you hadn´t spared him a thought, except when you laid in bed and found you never could fall asleep. When you did though, you found yourself stretching and searching for him on the bed, but of course he wasn´t there. He never would be either. Not again.

Your daily life now consisted of training with Wanda and the rest you would either spend in your room or in the common area. A couple of weeks ago Steve had shortly returned after he apparently had had a run-in with his old friend Bucky, which everyone thought to be dead. Steve´s visit had however resulted in a couple of awkward run ins and you caught him looking at you when you sat reading or spoke with Wanda in the common room. You hadn´t thought much of it at the time, but as you had watched a movie on the TV in your room where the love interest stared at the protagonist for most of the time when they were together. It wasn´t much of a creepy stare, it was romantic…

However, it had made a knot tie in your stomach. You had never intended to lead him on. It was too soon. You liked Steve, but it wouldn´t be fair to him when you hadn´t gotten over Loki´s rejection. It appeared that no one had noticed he had even been here in the first place, which you found suspiciously strange and wondered if it had all happened in your head. Being locked up like this would be reason enough for you to imagine things like that.

Also, you had tried to contact Thor, but he never answered the phone or your emails. Sending letters was not an option, and you had nothing important to tell him, except for his brother’s return. Even though it felt wrong you felt like you had no right to tell Thor about it. Loki had to tell him himself that he had cheated and lied once again.

Now the room you and Wanda trained in had been completely emptied and you had ordered for a few blocks of concrete to place in the room. Without question it had been brought. “You can´t be serious” Wanda said in her accent. You found it sweet. “Of course I am. We have done all the small things. Now this is the next step” you said as you removed your Jacket. Beneath it you wore dark blue tights and a white singlet. You hadn’t bothered to braid your hair and it hung in a loose ponytail. Wanda rolled her eyes. “Show me what you got” you said and stepped to the side. Wanda shot you a glance before she moved her hands before her. Red energy erupted from her hands and the concrete did in fact move easily. “Not bad” you said as you walked over so you had a better angle. But you knew she had been right. This would be easy for her, so you had a few surprises up your sleeve.

“In reality though, there would be people surrounding you” you said as you picked up the pad that Nat had showed you how to use. You tapped the square and from your upper right you heard shots being fired at Wanda. “Are you kidding me?!” she screamed. She didn´t have to know they weren´t real. The blocks fell to the floor as Wanda backed away. “Don´t you think this is a little extreme?” she asked. You shrugged. “Better to be prepared than learn it the hard way” you said. Wanda was still catching her breath.

“Let´s go then” she said and to your surprise she took her stance once more. “That´s the spirit” you said before you got another idea. “Have you ever controlled gas forms?” you asked. Wanda frowned. “Smoke, damp?” you asked. “I knew what you meant” she said and scowled slightly. “I was just asking” you said. “Leve the blocks” you said before you flicked your wrist dark grey smoke erupted from the centre of the room. “Is this you?” she asked. You shrugged and folded your hands together. “Let´s see what you got” you repeated. The smoke could be poisonous, of course it wasn’t. This was just an illusion. But Wanda didn´t know that. “Are you trying to kill us?” she said before she covered her mouth. “Possibly” you shrugged again. Wanda rolled her eyes before her eyes glowed red. She cast energy leading the gas upwards towards the small hatch in the ceiling. “Good!” you said.

“Let´s add another element” you said as you picked up the pad again. You pressed the square and the fake bullets shot around Wanda, they were just going to hit around her, not actually attack her directly. She had almost gotten all the smoke out when you noticed the monitor had started to fire the shots towards you. You knew they weren´t real, but Wanda didn´t her hand flew out as a bullet came right at you. You felt yourself getting lifted off the ground and the look on Wanda´s face told everything. She had misjudged the force she needed to get you out of the bullet´s way. The smoke behind her disappeared as your focus had gotten lost. And then you felt pressure on the back of your head before a crack sounded and everything went black.

A loud ringing sounded in your ears, and you heard nothing except for mumbling voices. You could fix this you thought and tried to use your magic. But you couldn´t nothing happened. You couldn´t move your arms. As you tried to focus the energy under your skin nothing happened, it felt like it was gone… The ringing didn´t stop and you tried to open your eyes. Bad idea. Everything was so blurry you couldn´t even make out who was standing before you. The light made your head hurt even more.

Before you could even take another breath, you were sent back to unconsciousness.

The ringing hadn´t disappeared as you felt yourself coming back. You tried to open your eyes but closed them quickly. Your hand clutched slightly an to you relief it did. Your mouth was dry and numb. Something was wrapped around your hand. Not something. A hand. Everything around you was extremely blurry as you opened your eyes. You fought to have them stay open. And slowly it adjusted. The one sitting beside you was a girl with long auburn hair. Her eyes were bright blue and paired with a pair of dark circles under her eyes. She said something you couldn´t make out. You only heard mumbling through the ringing. Where had you seen her before? You knew you had seen her but you couldn´t place your finger on who she was.

Finally, the ringing lowered. “Who are you?” you asked once you had cleared your throat slightly. The girl´s eyes widened. “Who am I?” the girl said before she answered “Wanda.” It didn´t ring a bell. “I´m sorry, but do I know you from somewhere?” you asked. The girl´s eyes started to water. “I didn´t mean to make you upset” you apologized. You moved forward but searing pain shot through your head, and you leaned back again.

You closed your eyes before opening them again. The girl, Wanda wasn´t there anymore. Now you were alone, and the light was low making it easier on your eyes. Suddenly a man appeared. A knot formed in your stomach. He appeared from behind the shadows in the corner. His black hair curled around his ears and on his shoulders. He wore fine clothes. Fine Asgardian clothes, you realized. His blue eyes almost glowed when the low light reflected off them.

“Who are you?” you asked as you moved further to the opposite side of the bed. Your body ached, but the fear rushed adrenalin through your system.

The man stopped.

He looked frightened. Sad. His eyes were watering. “What have they done to you?” he asked. “Nothing” you answered quick. Who had done what? You wondered. He reached out his arm and you flinched. He stopped.

“You truly do not know who I am?” he asked. “I´m sorry” you apologized. “Don´t” the man said. His brows tugged slightly together. “Do you remember who you are?” he asked. You scoffed. “Of course I know who I am” you said. “Then who are you” he asked. You were about to answer but froze as nothing came to mind. Your eyes shot to the man´s. “I-“ you started but had nothing to say.

The man stepped closer to you. “Please, don´t be scare of me” he said. “I don´t know you” you said. You could see the words hurt the man. He stepped closer to you. He reached out to grab your hand but you retreated it. Your head started to hurt again and you pinched the bridge of your nose. The man sat down on the bed. He was extremely close to you. But if he was here he probably could be trusted. He laid a hand on your cheek. The pain went away but you felt extremely drowsy. What was he doing to you?

And then like lightning from clear sky, as if a curtain had been drawn open. “Loki?” you said. You felt an extreme pull towards him. You couldn´t believe your eyes. All the strength you had to contain yourself disappeared and your arms instantly flung around his torso. “You lied” you said as you buried your face in his chest. His hand moved to the nape of your neck. You couldn´t remember much. Only that he had lied. What about you weren´t sure.

“I´m sorry” he said. “I´ll bring you home” he said. “Isn´t this home?” you asked. “It most certainly is not” he said before he kissed the top of your head. “My head hurts” you said. Whatever he had been doing was wearing off. “I know” he said. “Please bring me home” you almost begged. You didn´t know what home was. Where it was. But Loki made you feel safe.

Loki´s arm reached around your back and the other slithered under your knees. You reached around his neck but figured you didn´t have to. Even though he was so lean, he was stronger than one would expect.

“I´ll keep you safe” he said before a tunnel of light consumed the both of you. You felt as you were being pulled in all directions and your head hurt even worse than it had before. The ringing returned in your ears, but not as violently as before. Finally the pull stopped, but returned again for a short while. You opened your eyes and they quickly adjusted. Loki looked straight ahead as he carried you towards something. You watched as his hair bounced slightly at his balanced steps. Without even noticing you had reached up and twinned a piece of his hair around your finger. The corner of his mouth tugged slightly upwards.

“I can´t remember anything” you muttered. “Just you…” you added. “We will fix that” he said as he put you down on the bed. It was so soft it felt like you laid on a cloud. “But right now we sleep” he said. You closed your eyes and took a deep breath. You didn´t expect the bed to dip beside you. But it did. You weren´t tired, you had slept for who knew how long.

“What if I can´t sleep?” you asked. You rolled over and turned to face him. He was smiling to himself. “You should rest” he said before he looked over at you. “I´ve rested enough” you said. There was distance between the two of you and you didn´t know if you had ever been so close to him before. What you remembered was only his name and the safety it brought. Now tension bloomed both inside you and between the two of you.

“Loki?” you said. He hummed as he turned slightly to face you. “What exactly are we?” you asked. Loki looked almost unsure. “You really hit your head, didn´t you?” he said. His hand traced the arch of your eyebrow. You felt a warm tingling sensation where he touched you.

“We were engaged. But I messed up” he said. “I never should have left you” he said. “I thought I knew best, but I clearly didn´t” he added. “I don´t understand” you said. He moved slightly closer to you. “I thought I was protecting you by removing myself” he admitted. You frowned. “Why would that help?” you asked. Loki didn´t answer.

Loki rolled over to his side. You were so close you could feel his breath on your lips. Your eyes tilted downwards. They lingered on his lips before they returned to his eyes.

Your hand moved and cupped his cheek. You lifted yourself slightly off the mattress, but Loki beat you to it and his lips met yours as you leaned against the soft pillow. Fireworks went off in your head, as well as in the rest of you body. Loki´s touch made your headache go away. You melted into him and his touch and soon he was placed in between your thighs. His tongue graced your bottom lip before he entered your mouth. His hands roamed down the sides of your upper body. Your hands tugged on his shirt. His lips left yours and the slight headache returned. You had your eyes closed. “Are you alright?” Loki asked. “Yes” you lied. “Don´t lie, Gyðja” he said as he brushed your cheek with his thumb. No, this wasn't right... He wouldn't call me that...

The room started spinning and your ears started to ring violently.

Your eyes opened quickly. All you could hear was your heart pounding in your chest. The walls were lit by a golden light. It only took you a few more seconds to realize you were the source of the light. Your skin was like a sun, but it wasn't warm to the touch. Mesmerized you sat studying your hands. What is going on? you thought.

The door sprang open. In came Steve. He stopped once he looked at you. But he didn't look away. You weren't blinding.

Then the nausea hit.

You bucked over and puked all over the bed.

Steve rushed to your side. He gently grabbed your arm and your shoulder on the other side helping you out of bed. He whispered something but you couldn't make it out.

"I'm sorry" you muttered as you felt uneasy. You shook lightly.

"No, it's fine, y/n" he said. You didn't dare look up at him in case it would make you more uneasy.

"No, it's not" you said as he walked you into the bathroom. He understood you were still not well. You knelt over the toilet bowl and felt Steve's hands gently tie back your hair.

The tiles were cold against your knees

A new rush of nausea hit you and you bawled into the toilet. As you did so your skin glowed lightly, as if you had no control over it what so ever.

You heard new footsteps enter the room.

"I'll take it from here" Tony's voice said. Nothing happened for several seconds, until Steves footsteps was heard exiting the room. Your eyes were fixed at the bottom of the porcelain bowl.

"How are you doing?" you felt Tony's hand on your shoulder. You turned around and sat on the floor. Your hand flattened against your stomach as you tried to adjust yourself on the floor.

"Been better" you said as you noticed how sore your body was. Tony's eyes gleamed slightly.

"Do you remember anything?" he asked. "Wanda accidently hit me" you answered.

"Good" he said as he approached you. You flinched and he stopped slightly before he knelt down beside you.

"There's something I need to tell you" Tony said. "Do I have brain damage?" you half heartedly joked.

Tony let out a surprised chuckle.

"No" he said suddenly more serious. "You were out for six days" he said. You looked at him. "We ran some tests, the results weren't giving us any answers on why you still didn't respond" he said. "It has been around seven weeks since... Well since Rei- Loki left" he said before pausing. "And?" you asked. Your mouth was dry. "Noticed you weren't tied up to anything in your room?" he asked. It was true, you hadn't been.

"You're not hurt, y/n" he said and swallowed.

"You're pregnant"

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ijustwant2write · 3 years

Text

A Secret Romantic-Benedict Bridgerton x Reader x Eloise Bridgerton (Platonic)

(GIF credit to @aryaofoldstones)

Requested by anonymous: ‘Hello! I saw your looking for Bridgerton requests, I would love some Benedict x Eloise sibling fluff! They have such a good dynamic in the show and I need more’

(I wouldn’t mind making another part of this if people want it tbh)

Characters: Benedict Bridgerton x Reader, Eloise Bridgerton x Reader (platonic)

Meanings: (Y/N)=Your name

(Y/L/N)=Your last name

Warnings: Fluff, fluff, fluff

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Eloise’s gloved hands clung onto her book as she and her family arrived at yet another social event, a ball once again. Her mama had ensured she was dressed to catch the eyes of men, and Eloise knew that meant there would be no room for intelligent conversation. With Daphne now married to the Duke, Eloise had more pressure on her shoulders than she imagined, having to find a suitor of similar standards. However, it wasn’t just her on the market, her brothers were too, especially Benedict (Violet knew it would be extremely difficult to marry off Anthony first, opting for the second eldest son).

Eloise smiled whenever her mama looked her way, though it quickly disappeared once she turned around. Benedict had been instructed to escort her sister around the ball to help seek out suitors, the men knew each other or something about someone; he could help her meet the right one.

“I cannot believe I am here.” Eloise moaned as she looped her arm through her brothers.

“Believe me sister, I do not wish to be here either.”

“Why must you parade me around like a horse at a dressage in order to find a new owner?” Eloise kept catching the men’s gazes, turning up her nose in disgust.

“So dramatic.” he chuckled.

She scoffed.“Well, if you’re going to advise me on who I should be marrying, I shall do the same for you. Now let’s see...”

Eloise looked around the room at all the women, wondering who would be the best match for her brother. Most of these women had no personalities, relying on their outfits to express themselves. Eloise knew of some ladies that were nice, though had nothing in common with her brother.

Eloise shrugged, tugging on her brother’s arm towards the door.“Ah, there’s no one here for us. Let us make haste and leave-”

“Oh no you don’t,” Benedict pulled her back,“we have been strictly told to stay for the night, even if it is just to socialise and...get our names out there.”

Eloise groaned a little too loudly, Ben ducking his head in embarrassment.“How long do these balls go on for?”

“I have never stayed for the full duration.”

“That’s not the answer I want to hear.”

Benedict glanced down at her, somehow only just realising that Eloise had brought a book with her.“Is that book sewed to your hand sister?”

“I brought it just in case I became bored. Which I am already.”

“I shall go and grab us some refreshments. Might as well enjoy them whilst we’re here.”

Eloise let her brother slip away, quickly finding a hiding spot by leaning up against a wall, away from the hustle and bustle of the crowds. She opened her book, continuing where she left off, happy she brought a pencil to scribble down notes for later. The studying never stopped for Eloise.

“Excuse me?” a woman’s voice interrupted her too soon.

Eloise tried her best to be polite, though her smile came off as sarcastic.“Yes?”

“Sorry,” the woman looked taken back,“I thought you were reading a book that I am reading at the moment, but I was wrong. I’ve disturbed you, I shall leave you alone-”

“Wait,” Eloise had now sparked an interest. No other lady had ever approached her like this,“I don’t mean to be rude. What book had you expected?”

“It’s oh so obvious, but I’ve been reading ‘Pride and Prejudice’ by Jane Austen. It’s the newest book out at the moment, and my mama lets me read it seeing as it involves a woman finding someone to marry. Although, it’s definitely about something deeper, that’s just what I told her.”

“I don’t indulge in romantic novels myself, but I am glad to hear of a female author selling her work.”

“It’s fantastic. And it’s nice to be able to read something without it being snatched out of my hands. Oh, where are my manners? I’m (Y/N) (Y/L/N). Sorry, I’ve been dancing with men all night and none of the conversations have been as riveting as this so far.”

“Why am I not surprised?” they both laughed.“I’m Eloise Bridgerton.”

(Y/N) tried to not show her shock when she heard the surname. They were only the most talked about family, her mama had gone on and on about them, especially when Lady Whistledown mentioned them in her writings.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you. Might I ask what it is that you are reading?”

“It is to do with my studies. I truly hate these events, so I thought I would ensure my mind was being worked properly.” Eloise realised that could come off as rude, squeezing her eyes shut in embarrassment.“I did not mean to offend you by that.”

“It really isn’t any bother.” (Y/N) giggled.“I rather enjoy these just for the dancing and drinks, I find promenading to be more successful in finding a suitor. Though I would much rather sneak off and see if I can get a few more pages in of a book I shouldn’t be reading.”

“Eloise, why must you go wondering off like that...” Benedict’s words trailed off as he approached his sister, spotting a beautiful woman stood by her.

Eloise’s eyes flickered between the two, and she smiled when she saw the adoration in her brother’s eyes. Cheekily taking the two glasses from his hands, she passed one to (Y/N), who awkwardly took it. (Y/N) had gazed upon the Bridgerton men in passing, they were very nice to look at. Of course, she never divulged in any fantasies about them, that would be silly. But seeing one in front of her had taken her breath away.

“Thank you brother.” Eloise said, taking a sip.“This is Lady (Y/N) (Y/L/N), a new friend of mine.”

He gently took her free hand in his, bending forwards slightly to kiss it. (Y/N) had this done to her many times, but this was different. Benedict made her feel butterflies in her stomach. Eloise could tell her mama was going to love this.

She cleared her throat.“We were just speaking of art, actually.”

(Y/N) furrowed her eyebrows.“We were talking about books.”

“I was about to move the topic along.”

“What kind of art would that be then?” Benedict asked, knowing what game his sister was playing.

“The...drawing, kind.”

“Isn’t all art drawn?”

“No, it is also painted.”

“I think artists may sketch out a rough idea before painting.”

“Well you would know brother, seeing as you yourself are an artist.”

“I wouldn’t say that-”

“You paint, Lord Bridgerton?” (Y/N) asked.

“Ah, yes, and I sketch.” he hoped his cheeks weren’t turning red.

“Anything in particular?”

“Mostly people.”

“Are you both attending the art exhibition my family are holding next week?”

“That’s your families’ exhibit?” Benedict became excited.

“Yes, my father collects a lot of art work. Then mother realised she could make a social event out of it, but at least everyone will be able to admire the work.”

“Would you believe it, we already have it noted down in our social calendar!” Eloise informed (Y/N). Benedict could sense her over-reacting, trying to keep a smile as (Y/N)’s face lit up in excitement.

“Perfect!” (Y/N) looked back up at Ben, making him stand a little taller.“It will be nice to have someone there who knows about the artwork. It will make for an interesting conversation. Just don’t let my father lecture you, he will talk for far too long! And I know you will be too polite to try and get away.”

“My brother is very polite.” Eloise said.“In fact, I’m surprised he hasn’t-”

“Excuse me for the intrusion,” a young man said from beside (Y/N),“but I was wondering if we could resume our dance lady (Y/N)?”

(Y/N) was smiling, but Eloise knew that look; it was the face women made when a man who made them uncomfortable approached, but they had to remain ladylike and polite.

“Actually my brother just asked her and she said yes. You two best make your way to the floor before the music starts again.” Eloise nudged her brother.

Benedict was confused at his sisters offer, until he locked eyes with (Y/N) again. They were pleading him to sweep her away, she was even leaning away from this man. He had been disrespectful in some way, and he wasn’t letting (Y/N) go through that again (despite only knowing the girl for a few minutes). He smugly smiled at the man, holding out his arm which (Y/N) took a little too quickly. Eloise was happy with herself as the pair walked off, sending the man a death glare when he asked her to dance instead. Once he left, her eyes went back to find her brother, who was already dancing with (Y/N), both smiling and laughing. Her mama was going to be ecstatic about this.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Eloise sat in the drawing room, obviously lounging with a book. Her younger siblings were being irritating as usual, running around her in circles. Before they arrived, she had peace. Eloise wanted a few moments alone, because she knew her mama would be bursting with questions about the night before.

“Ah, there you are.” Violet said as she walked in.

The book flopped into Eloise’s lap, a frown on her face. There goes her reading time.

“So, how was last night? Did you meet anyone?” her mama sat beside her.“You two, go play outside if you’re going to run around please.”

The children stopped as their mama spoke, sending each other devilish grins before they ran out of the room again, their giggling echoing down the halls. Violet went to shout after them, but decided to leave it be, there were more pressing matters.

“Well mama, do you see any suitors?” Eloise gestured around her.

Violet sighed.“Did you even try last night?”

“My life will not be reduced to a single night where I was forced to peacock around in order to please a man.”

“Oh, Eloise, must you make everything so dramatic?”

“Funny, Benedict said the same thing.”

“Actually, where is your brother? I have not seen him all morning.”

“He went out.” Eloise was relieved that the focus would now be off of her.“He’s calling upon a lady.”

Violet’s eyes widened.“What? When? Who?”

“Lady (Y/N) (Y/L/N).”

“(Y/L/N)? They are quite reputable.”

Eloise rolled her eyes.“Mama, she is a lovely girl. I don’t think you should just judge her on what family she comes from.”

“Oh, so you approve of this girl?”

“I...I mean...Well, I only spoke with her for a mere few minutes.”

“But?”

Eloise let out a huff.“I enjoyed her company. I think Benedict likes her. I didn’t see him for the rest of the night until it was time to leave. He spent all his time with her.”

Violet became overjoyed.“Oh, what marvelous news! I wish he had told me. Do you know what he took to her? Flowers? Food?”

“I have no idea mama. Just wait for his return and he will tell you all the details. I am not a psychic.”

Violet was impatient as she awaited the return of her son. Poor Collin had also been questioned when he showed up in the drawing room, but he had overslept in bed, waking with a terrible headache. It seemed that it was about to come back to him when his mama bombarded him with questions as to why he hadn’t called upon anyone that morning. Eloise kept her giggles quiet, ducking behind her book when Collin sent her daggers.

Poor Benedict had no idea what was in store for him. His cheeks were aching from how much he was smiling. He wasn’t surprised when he arrived at the (Y/L/N)’s house and saw multiple callers for (Y/N). However, jealousy rose inside him when he thought about these men dancing with her, trying to convince her that they were the man to marry. He held a beautiful bouquet of flowers, remembering that (Y/N) had mentioned her favourite the night before. Looking around at any other flowers she received, he was glad to see no other gentleman had chose it. Surely that would show he was listening? He endured sonnets, stories, songs and boasting from the other men, trying not to show his dissatisfaction as each one stepped forward. There was pressure that her parents were there, especially when he realised he was the last gentleman, everyone else had left.

(Y/N) had been incredibly anxious when she saw Benedict that morning. He had been the only man she genuinely smiled at, hoping he came at his own will, not forced by his mama. The night before had been the best ball (Y/N) had ever been to. Benedict was sweet, charming, handsome and interesting. They were able to talk about anything and everything, no small talk involved like all the other men she danced with. He had swooned her, and here he was, calling upon her.

Back at the Bridgerton house, Violet had not sat down since talking Collin’s ear off. Eloise was still in the drawing room with her, as were her two youngest siblings, munching on biscuits as they threw questions at their mama. She did not have all the answers, sometimes not even hearing them speak for she was too deep in her thoughts. At one point, she did sit, but beside the window, o the lookout for any signs of her son. When a carriage pulled up in front of the house, Violet leapt out of her seat, startling her children. She made a beeline to the door, standing there with her hands clasped together. When Benedict walked in, he too flinched, not expecting his mama to be there.

“Mama, how long have you been stood there?” Benedict asked as he walked past her, pinching a biscuit from his brother’s plate.

“She’s been waiting for you.” Eloise explained, also excited to hear about his calling.

“I hope you sat down at some point.” he joked, sitting beside Eloise and slouching.

Violet hurried to sit on the sofa across him.“You didn’t tell me you were calling on a lady this morning.”

“Well, we got back late from the ball yesterday evening, and I had to leave early to ensure I got there in good time. Though it seemed every other man thought that too.”

“There were many men there?”

“Yes, quite a few.”

Eloise straightened up at her brother’s grumpy expression.“You really like her!”

“How wonderful!” Violet gushed.

“Do not get ahead of yourselves.”

“But you do, don’t you? Otherwise you wouldn’t have called on her.”

Ben was lost for words. He couldn’t argue with that, and he did like seeing his mama happy.“Yes, yes I do. And it would seem she reciprocates the feelings.”

“This is such good news! I must see what our social calendar looks like, we must ensure you two spend time together.”

“Actually mama-” Eloise went to tell her about the art exhibit until Ben interrupted.

“Good idea mama.” he nodded, smiling at her as she walked away, a spring in her step. Once she was gone, he let out a big breath.“I just needed a moment without questions from her.”

“Well, you’re going to have questions from me.” Eloise angled her body to face him, her elbow perched on the sofa with her face resting in her hand.“I didn’t think you were going to call upon her. Are my match making skills really that good?”

“I hate to admit it, but yes, you have done an excellent job.” Benedict felt relaxed thinking about (Y/N).

“So, what happened this morning?”

“I took her flowers, she told me her favourites last night, and then I had to sit there whilst her other gentleman callers desperately tried to impress her. It was agony! Finally I was able to have time with her, and it was just...I don’t know how to put it into words.”

“Did you bring her anything else?”

Benedict became bashful.“I brought her a sketchbook, like the one I have. She mentioned how she used to often sketch when she was younger. I thought it would be a unique gift.”

“Benedict, you truly are a romantic at heart.”

“For her I am, yes.”

Eloise smiled for her brother, until a smirk fell on his face.“What? Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Aw, is someone also a secret romantic?”

“No!” Eloise protested, quickly grabbing her book again.“I am just happy you found someone.”

“And you helped, because you secretly want everyone to find someone.”

“No I don’t! You’re ruining this moment now Benedict.”

“Don’t worry Eloise, you’ll find someone.” Ben joked.

She groaned.“You are insufferable...but I still want to go to that art exhibit.”

“To see love bloom?”

“N-no, to see the art work.”

“Of course, of course. But, thank you Eloise.”

She tried not to smile, but couldn’t help it.“You’re welcome.”

2K notes · View notes

weasleylangs · 3 years

Text

opposites attract - f.w.

Pairing: Fred Weasley x Hufflepuff Fem!Reader Summary: The quiet, Hufflepuff bookworm has captured the heart of the mischievous Gryffindor. Warnings: none! Word Count: 2k

A/N: For the anon that asked for Fred with a Hufflepuff reader who he’s uncharacteristically sweet for! I’m sorry it took so long, I hope you (and everyone else who reads it) enjoys it!!

P.S let me know if you’d like to be added to a tag list!

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Y/N sits in charms, completely zoned out. Charms was always her best subject and she was luckily one of those ‘never study, always pass’ students. The same could not be said about her boyfriend, however, who was sitting across the room trying to tickle his best friend with his quill and distract him.

Y/N and Fred were an unusual couple, and no one understood how the shy Hufflepuff girl managed to catch the mischievous Gryffindor’s attention. Fred’s idea of a good time was turning the corridor into a swamp or roughhousing during quidditch practise whilst Y/N’s was curled up in front of a fire, a nice book in her hand. But no one questioned it, because somehow they made it work.

Fred caught her eye and winked. They’ve been dating for six months now and he never gets tired from the shy look on her face when he looks at her. She shakes her head, hiding behind her hair and turning her attention back to Flitwick as he drones on about their assignment.

When the bell rings, signalling next period, Fred’s across the room in no time. Y/N has her head down, grabbing her notebook and quill when Fred snatched them out of her hand whilst simultaneously grabbing her bag from the floor. “I’ll carry them for you, love,” he said, smiling.

This wasn’t unusual behaviour. Before the couple got together, everyone always thought Fred was a flirt and was hooking up with different people every weekend, and whilst they were right at the time, Fred is absolutely whipped for his badger girlfriend and hasn’t even looked at another girl since their first date. He’s always wanting to carry her books or he’s slinging an arm around her shoulder.

She has him wrapped around her finger and he couldn’t care less.

“You don’t have to do that, Freddie. You know my bag is heavy,” she says trying to grab the bag from him. Fred only takes three classes, considering the three O.W.L’s he received in their fifth year, meaning sometimes he only has one class a day. However, Y/N managed to receive ten, only failing History of Magic (‘Who fucking cares?’ was everyone’s response), resulting in her having multiple classes a day and therefore a very heavy bag.

Fred, of course, shrugs it off, “I’m a beater, darling. Nice and strong. I can barely tell that you have five textbooks in here,” he says as he winks and causes Y/N’s face to heat up as she swats him on the chest. “I’m just saying you don’t have too, I can carry my own bag,” she pouts. While she knows Fred is more than happy to lug her bag around, she hates the idea that he’s only doing it out of obligation to be a ‘good boyfriend’.

These insecurities aren’t new. She hears what people say about them and it doesn’t bother her for the most part. Just there’s only so many times she can handle people she’s not even friends with talking about how ‘Y/N isn’t right for Fred’.

“You have potions now, yes?” Fred asks, pulling Y/N out of her worries as she follows Fred through the corridors. That’s another thing she never expected, Fred learnt her timetable when they started dating so he could always walk her to class. “I do, Freddie. You have a free right, are you spending it with George and Lee?”

Fred nods, “I sure am, we’re meeting in the One-Eyed Witch passage to pop down to Honeydukes too, you need anything?” Y/N frowns at this. “Freddie, that passage is on the third floor on the other side of the school. You don’t have to walk me to potions,” she tries to grab her bag from him again and he shakes his head.

“Darling, what part of ‘I want to do this’ do you not understand?” While his tone is sharp, he’s not angry. Y/N doesn’t think she’s ever seen Fred this serious, a glint of cheekiness is always present in his eyes but right now, he looks about as serious as Snape when talking about proper cauldron care.

“I just don’t want to keep you from the boys,” she whispers, tugging at the sleeves of her robes. They stop walking, and Fred drags her body into a hug. “The boys are fine waiting, now do you want anything from Honeydukes.”

She falters for a second, just enjoying being in his presence. Despite the short amount of time they’ve been dating, Y/N knows what she feels for him is love and she can only hope the tall ginger boy feels the same way in return. His embrace can only be described as comfort, all Y/N’s worries rushing away as his familiar scent of firewood and cinnamon fills her senses.

“Some sugar quills, please,” she mumbles into his robes. “Anything for you,” he replies, pulling away and grabbing her hand. “C’mon, you’re going to be late for potions.”

It’s after dinner by the time Y/N catches Fred again. She’s walking out of the Great Hall when she feels her robes get tugged on and she almost falls over.

“Hi,” Fred says, “some sugar quills for my sugar quill.”

Y/N cringes at the cheesy nickname as she thanks him, popping the sweets into her robe pockets, “What are your plans for tonight?” Fred shrugs, more quiet than usual as he plays with Y/N’s fingers. “Nothing, I was… I was wondering if I can come and hang in the Hufflepuff common room with you?”

He’s shy and Y/N almost coos at it. Fred ‘no filter when he speaks’ Weasley is blushing as he asks his girlfriend to spend some time with her in her house common room, this is a once in a lifetime happening.

“Of course, Freddie. Any reason why?” It’s not that she doesn’t want him spending time with her. But Fred’s never expressed an interest in spending the night in, rather opting to terrorise Filch or another teacher after dinner.

“You like spending your evenings reading in front of the fire. I feel like I’ve barely seen you today,” he whispers. At this, she decides not to torture the poor boy any further and grabs his hand. “C’mon,”

They arrive at the common room in no time, no one batting an eye at the Gryffindor waltzing into the common room where he doesn’t belong. In fact, he gets quite a few “Hi Fred’s!” from people in their year. He’s always been popular and well known, so of course, the house of kindness is happy to have him.

“I’m going to run up to my dorm and change, are you sure you’re okay?” Fred nods, sitting himself down on the soft yellow chair in front of the fire. It’s Y/N’s favourite chair to read in and Fred knows it. “Sure am, hurry back before I freeze to death.”

Y/N speed changes, switching out her uniform for some sweatpants, one of Fred’s old jumpers and her favourite fuzzy sock. While she’s up there, she grabs a spare sweater she’s stolen from Fred for him to change into and her copy of ‘Frankenstein’ from her nightstand and rushes back downstairs and straight into Fred’s lap. “Hi,” she whispers, kissing him on the cheek.

Fred hums a hello as he settles into the soft pillows of the couch. Y/N perches herself next to him, slinging her legs across his lap with her back against the arm rest. “What’s it about?” Fred asks, gesturing to the book she’s just opened. He knows Y/N’s love for muggle books and he loves hearing her talk about them, even though he never understands. “A scientist who creates a ‘monster’ through experiments… It’s one of my favourites.”

She waves the book in Fred’s face and sure enough, the sticky notes and the plastic tabs are sticking out, referencing all her favourite parts. “It sounds cool, can I read it after you?”

Y/N is shy about this. Books are very important to her and she feels her sticky notes and writing in the margins are her deepest thoughts, a peep into her soul. But the boy in front of her owns her heart, every single part of it, and she decided then and there, she wants to share every part of herself with him. “Sure, but you have to promise to not judge my notes.”

He could never, the Hufflepuff girl in his lap turns his heart to mush no matter how much he tries to hide it and he can’t even imagine hurting her. He holds his pinky out, “I promise,” he says as she hooks her own with his and he presses a kiss to her forehead.

They sit in silence for a while. Fred starts conversing with members of the Hufflepuff quidditch team (“We’re going to crush you next week, Kirke” she hears Fred say at one point and she has to nudge him with her knee to not start a brawl in the common room) while Y/N reads. At one point, her hand ends up in Fred’s hair, playing with the short strands at the nape of his neck.

When she does this, Fred leans into her touch and his eyes flicker shut for only a second. She thinks she’s finally found a way to quiet him down and she makes a mental note to play with his hair next time she wants to get some reading done.

The time starts to near 10pm as Y/N starts yawning, and as much as Fred would love to stay, he knows he’ll have enough trouble getting back to Gryffindor tower without George, Lee and their trusty Mauraders Map. “I should probably get going, darling,” Fred mutters after a while and when he looks at his girlfriend, she’s pouting.

“I wish you could stay,” she says and when Fred cocks his eyebrow she laughs, “not like that, you git!”

She quickly stands, pulling Fred’s gangly body up from the couch and into her arms. “I’ll see you tomorrow morning, we have double Defence,” Fred says laughing and she feels his chest rumble with laughter. “Too long,” she mumbles in reply. When Y/N gets tired, she gets clingy which was one of the earliest things Fred ever learnt about her. It’s always one of the cutest things about her.

He walks to the portrait hole, his small girlfriend clinging to his body and he presses a soft kiss to her hairline before detaching her. “Darling, I have to go.”

He feels terrible. He knows she isn’t being clingy to make him feel bad, she genuinely just wants to spend time with him. She yawns again, eyes scrunched closed as she stretches her arms that somehow end up wrapped back around his waist.

“Okay, you can go,” she gives him one final squeeze before letting him go and looking up at him and before Fred can stop himself the words are slipping out.

“I love you.”

This wakes her up immediately and her eyes are wide as she looks at him, “R-really?”

Fred was going to pretend he never said it, worried it was both too early and that she didn’t feel the same way. But the way she’s looking at him, glints of happiness in her eyes and the biggest smile he’s ever seen on her face he knows now is the right time.

“I do, I love you.”

She jumps on him again, pressing her lips to his. Her lips are soft against his, they always are and the kiss is filled with love and adoration. Neither of them is aware of how long they stand there, embraced in each other’s arms until they’re barely kissing anymore, their smiles too wide.

“I love you too, Freddie. I love you more,” she says, full seriousness in her face. “Oh love, you won’t win this argument.” He presses a kiss to her lips again before slinking out of the portrait hole, leaving Y/N standing with her fingers pressed to her lips smiling.

#fred weasley x reader #fred weasley fanfiction #fred weasley one shot #fred weasley imagine #fred weasley

1K notes · View notes

queenshelby · 3 years

Text

My Friend’s Father (Part Five)

Pairing: Cillian Murphy x Reader

Warning: Age Gap, Mild Sexual References

Words: 1,848

Notes:

I have decided to make this into a series.

Alright, no judgment. This was a dream of mine and I felt like I had to write it down. Everyone in this Fic is over the age of 18 and this Fic is in no way based on Cillian’s real family life. It’s pure filth.

*************************

YOUR POV

Two weeks had passed since you visited your friend Denise in Dublin and it was time for the annual Galway Arts Festival.

Denise had been working on a photography project for the past year and had been nominated for a student award in Galway as part of which ten of her photographs were being displayed during the Arts Festival.

Whilst, as you had expected, Cillian didn’t contact you, you knew that he would be there to support his daughter. Being an artist himself, he was very proud of her and her work and he supported her projects not only mentally but also financially with the caveat that she would finish her degree at Trinity College.

Unlike him, he didn’t want her to drop out of university even though she hated it and you certainly understood his reasoning.

Contrary to Denise, you had no creative bone in your body. You enjoyed art and theatre, but weren’t an artist or performer yourself. Instead, you were an A Grade Law Student who had become rather bored in Galway and had recently applied for a scholarship to Oxford University.

Reading was your passion and you had always been known as a geek. In school, you were the girl that no one liked, nerdy, not interested in fashion or social media and wearing braces, which, luckily, had been removed three years ago.

You were shy and it was only for Denise that you came out of your shell. She was popular in school, mostly due to her name, but also because she was generally confident and, over the years, she helped you gain confidence especially after you had left high school.

But, today, you knew you would be questioning your gained confidence once again since, first of all, you would be seeing Cillian again and the truth was that you couldn’t stop thinking about him in an intimate way and, secondly, you were featured completely naked on some of Denise’s photographs.

Whilst the photographs were artistic and not sexual in any way and your most intimate part wasn’t visible on them, it bothered you knowing that people you disliked would see you so vulnerable and you couldn’t remember why you had agreed to being photographed like that.

The other woman who Denise chose to photograph was Amalie. She was 23 and had been Denise’s friend for a while as well but, unlike you, she began modelling professionally when she was just 16. You all went to the same private school together and, clearly, her lifestyle had been largely financed by her parents. She always wore expensive clothes and had no interest in pursuing a career other than modelling, which barely sustained her lifestyle considering the few small jobs she got.

***

Just as you served your last cup of coffee to an elderly lady sitting in the corner of the café you were working at, you saw Denise, Amalie and two other friends of Denise walk in.

‘Hey guys, take a seat. I will be right with you. I am just about to finish my shift’ you said as you hung up your apron.

‘Please tell me you will get changed before the Gallery opening tonight?’ Amalie asked somewhat weirdly and you couldn’t help but roll your eyes as you sat down at the table with her, Denise and the others before ordering some coffees for yourselves.

‘No, I thought I would go like this’ you said sarcastically, looking down at your coffee-stained clothes.

‘I bought a dress for tonight’ you then said, after Amalie didn’t seem to sense your sarcasm.

‘Right’ she then said as she flicked through Instagram and you simply looked at Denise who shrug her shoulders.

‘What are you looking for?’ you asked curiously as her eyes seemed to be glued to her phone.

‘She is looking to find more photos of my dad and Laura Jennings’ Denise said, rolling her eyes.

‘Laura Jennings, as in the actress?’ you asked, causing Amalie to nod.

‘Yes, apparently they have been dating’ Amalie then confirmed, causing you to swallow harshly. You knew that you shouldn’t care but you couldn’t help it. Knowing that Cillian was seeing someone made you feel ill.

‘And you care about that why?’ you then asked Amalie after an uncomfortable shiver ran down your spine.

‘Apparently, just like you, Amalie thinks my dad is a DILF’ Denise huffed out before telling you how disgusting you all were.

‘Well, he is though…he is super hot’ Amalie then joked before carrying on. ‘And I don’t understand how you don’t know about Laura Jennings and whether this is true or not. You need to find out’ Amalie then said but Denise simply shook her head.

‘My father doesn’t share this sort of stuff with me and I certainly don’t want to know about his sex life, thank you very much. In so far as I am concerned, he doesn’t have sex, ever…yuck! Also, I would appreciate if you could not talk about my dad anymore, please. It grosses me out’ Denise said and you knew that, all of this had become a common occurrence ever since the day the first episode of Peaky Blinders aired on BBC, a show which Denise refuses to watch herself because of the heavy sexual content and a show which you, only a week ago, had begun to binge watch.

Cillian’s POV

When Cillian walked into the basement after you had left, he immediately saw the small folded up note you had left him but, reading it, made him somewhat uncomfortable.

He was torn about what to do with it and certainly knew that he should ignore it. He couldn’t see you again even if he wanted to.

The fact that you were 23 years younger than him and that you were his daughter’s best friend made it all wrong and highly inappropriate and he didn’t know what had gotten into him in the first place when he gave into you.

He had never felt attracted towards you in any sort of way until that last visit which was the first time had seen you since you and your family had moved away.

You changed in many ways and he wasn’t sure what it was that he liked about you. But what he knew was that it was more than just sexual attraction, which was usually something he knew how to supress.

With that in mind, he placed your note into his wallet and decided to ignore it for now. But he couldn’t quite bring himself to throw it out.

***

With his bags packed it was time for him to return to Manchester and resume filming of the final season of Peaky Blinders.

The first week of filming went well and Cillian decided to spend the weekend with his friend, fellow actress Laura Jennings. Cillian and her had developed a friend with benefits sort of relationship. No strings attached and no feelings involved. After his divorce from Denise’s mother, he wasn’t ready for anything else and Laura would certainly not have been the type of woman he would have wanted a relationship with in the first place.

Unlike him, she wasn’t press shy and, whilst they kept their arrangement a secret as best as they could, she was otherwise quite active on social media.

Cillian, on the other hand, only maintained a private Instagram account with the sole purpose of being able to check on his children. Whilst they were adults, he was still worried about them, especially Denise who had recently gotten herself in a lot of trouble after distancing herself from this Jeremy boy.

***

‘Another wine?’ Laura asked as Cillian was relaxing on top of the doonas, wearing nothing but his black Calvin Klein briefs, after they had spent the last hour doing exactly what friends with benefits would do after not having seen each other for over two weeks due to busy filming schedules.

‘Yes please…thanks’ he responded as he reached for his phone after a notification had popped up.

It was his daughter Denise who had posted on Instagram and, since she hadn’t posted for a while, he decided to check it out, hoping that she wasn’t with Jeremy again.

To his surprise, three new pictures of Denise and her friends showed up when he opened the APP and, one of them, there was you.

In the picture, you were wearing accompanied by a man in his late twenties, wearing a suit while you were wearing a dark blue dress and he couldn’t help but wonder who the man by your side was.

You looked simply stunning, with your hair long and open and your shoulders exposed. You were wearing only a little bit of make up and showed your beautiful smile.

‘There you go Mr Murphy’ Laura then said as she returned to the bedroom with another glass of wine, pulling Cillian’s phone out of his hand and climbing on top of him.

‘Round Two?’ she then asked eagerly as she reached for another condom, but Cillian’s thoughts were elsewhere entirely.

‘Maybe tomorrow, I am tired. It has been a long week, sorry’ he explained, causing Laura to pout with disappointment.

But the second round never eventuated as Cillian left Laura’s house the following morning to drive back to Manchester to resume filming.

On his way back to Manchester, he called his daughter Denise to check on her and while he did, he enquired about your companion on the Instagram posts.

‘Why do you want to know?’ Denise asked somewhat confused but Cillian played it cool.

‘He looks familiar, that’s all. Didn’t he go to your school?’ he then asked, playing dumb.

‘Oh god no, he is 29. His name is Connor and he is an accountant. Y/N wouldn’t date anyone our age. You know she isn’t a normal 21-year-old’ Denise joked, referring to your nerdiness and intellect.

‘Apparently not’ Cillian chuckled before asking another question about the stranger on the picture. ‘So, they are dating?’ he asked.

‘I think they went on two or three dates or something. Why do you care?’ Denise asked.

‘No reason. I was just wondering’ Cillian confirmed before changing the topic.

Tag List:

@lilymurphy03@deefigs @theflamecrystal @desperate-and-broken @weepingstudentfishhorse @livinginfantaxy @rosey1981 @atomicsoulcollecto @peakyboyslover @nerdy4itall@elenavampire21 @hanster1998@mariapaiva13 @fairypitou @harry-is-your-sunflower @zozeebo @lauren-raines-x @kasaikawa @littlewierdalien @sad-huffle-nerd @theflamecrystal @peakymalfoyscullymulder @themissthang@0ghostwriter0 @stylescanbeatmyback @1-800-peakyblinders @datewithgianni @momoneymolife @ntmynouis @lilymurphy03 @mcntsee@cloudofdisney@missymurphy1985 @peakymalfoyscullymulder @otterly-fey @janelongxox @uchihacumdump @basiclassy @being-worthy @chaotic-bean-of-smolness @margoo0 @chocolatehalo @vhscillian @ysmmsy @littlewierdalien @crazymar15 @stickyknightflowerbailiff @im-constantly-fangirling @goldensunflowe-r @tellingyouastory @captivatedbycillianmurphy @namelesslosers @littlewhiterose @ttzamara @ttzamara @cilleveryone

@peaky-cillian

@severewobblerlightdragon @ysmmsy

#cillian murphy smut #Cillian Murphy x Reader #cillian murphy #cillian murphy imagine #cillian murphy x y/n #cillian murphy x you

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mercy-burning · 3 years

Text

Petite Etoile

Pairing: Spencer Reid x femReader Summary: BAU!Reader used to be a stripper, and when people where she used to work are being murdered, the team is called in to investigate. Category: Fluff, Smut 18+ (oral sex- male and female receiving, penetrative sex, Reader also does a stripping performance) Warnings: Sex, language, mentions of murder/violence and all the things you’d normally find in an episode of Criminal Minds. (As always, if there’s anything I missed, let me know what I should include in warnings! I want to be as mindful as I can about what I post. Thank you!) Word Count: 7.8k

MASTERLIST

NOTE: This is going up way later than I said it would, so I’m sorry if you were looking forward to this, I just haven’t been motivated lately. But I really have to get out of my writing slump, and I’m hoping I can do that soon. Anyway, I hope you like it! Thanks for reading 🥰 Also, I know that Don’t Blame Me by Taylor Swift doesn’t exist at the time of early season 2, which is when I imagine this taking place, but for the sake of the story let’s pretend it does, because that’s the song I had in mind when I wrote the performance scene 😉😂

***

When Y/N walked into work Thursday morning, everything was as normal as it could be. She chatted with Elle on her way up the elevator, handed JJ her coffee as she made her way to Hotch's office, and ruffled Reid's hair when she passed him, smiling at the way he blushed at her affectionate gesture.

But when the team was called into the round-table room, and she watched as JJ presented their next case, Y/N felt a little sick to her stomach.

Over the past week, three strippers from the town she'd lived in for years before moving to Virginia had been found stabbed in various parts of the block surrounding Starsight. She knew the place well. Not only did she used to work there as a stripper after she graduated, but her best friend, Irene, owned the establishment, and she'd practically become the sister Y/N never had. She helped her through college and pushed her to go into the Bureau. If people, Irene's people, were dying, why hadn't she called or said anything?

Thankfully Y/N didn't recognize any of the dancers who'd been killed, because if she had, she'd feel a lot worse. But even still, she wanted to find who was behind it, and she would. The BAU always did. And with her background knowledge of the scene and the town, Y/N figured she might be able to lend an extra helping hand.

But first she had to tell the team about her past.

It wasn't a secret that she used to be a stripper. In fact, it wasn't really something she was able to hide. With someone as curious as Penelope Garcia in her life, Y/N wouldn't have been able to hide it even if she wanted to. Thankfully though, besides the occasional teasing comment from Morgan, and sometimes Elle, the team didn't treat her any differently. She wasn't Y/N The Former Stripper, she was just Y/N. She was good at her job, and everyone respected and liked her just the way she was.

While debriefing on the jet, she was about to bring it up when Morgan did it first, seemingly sly like he'd discovered some big secret. "Hey, Y/N, didn't you used to live near this place?"

She nodded, clearing her throat. "Uh, yeah, that's actually what I was going to bring up. Starsight is where I used to work before I moved here. I know the owner of the place, she's one of my best friends."

She could tell Morgan wanted to tease her some more about her previous work, but before he could get a word in Gideon spoke from behind her. "Irene Whitcomb?"

"Yeah."

"Good, when we land I want you, Morgan, and Reid to go talk to her. See if you can find anything out."

Y/N nodded, and in front of her, she noticed Reid was a little flushed. It didn't surprise her considering when everyone found out her previous job, he almost choked on his coffee, and Morgan laughed hysterically while he had a coughing fit. It was obvious to Y/N from the beginning that Spencer had had a little crush on her, and it didn't bother her at all. Every once in a while she'd pat his knee before she got up from her seat next to him or wink at him as they saw each other briefly in passing, just to see how he'd react, and by now it was a staple of their relationship. It never did go any further than that though, Y/N afraid she might make him too uncomfortable.

But even still, she couldn't help but give him a flirty smile as he blinked rapidly in front of her, still seeming to process what was going to happen when they landed. When he excused himself to go to the bathroom, she gave him one more wink and a small bite of her lip as he passed.

Morgan laughed softly beside her. "You're gonna ruin the poor kid if you keep that up, girlie."

"I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about," she responded, even though the smile on her face suggested otherwise.

***

A strip club being almost at full capacity in the middle of the day was more common than one might think. It had surprised Y/N when she first started working at Starsight, and even now she still didn't really understand why. Regardless it was almost 3pm, and if things had stayed the same over the years, which by the looks of things seemed to be the case, Irene should have been behind the bar.

It must have been a sight to behold, Y/N mused as she and her colleagues navigated through the club in search of its owner, and it sounded like the beginning to a bad joke— a former stripper turned FBI agent, a guy who looks like he just walked straight out of a procedural cop show, and an adorably and obviously nervous skinny kid with glasses and trembling hands walk into a strip club at 3pm... The thought made Y/N laugh to herself, right before Irene spotted her.

"Y/N!"

It was obvious that she wanted to jump over the bar and give her old friend a hug, but given the circumstances, Irene settled for dropping a shot glass, spilling the drink on the counter, and clapping her hands quickly a few times in succession. A wide smile and kind eyes greeted the three agents as they approached.

"Irene, hi," Y/N greeted with a large smile of her own. "I wish I could have came to visit under better circumstances."

"Right, me too..." The blonde woman's smile faded for a second, just long enough that the recognizable signs of grief came and go quickly before replacing themselves with bittersweet niceties. "Anyway, you wanna introduce me to your friends?"

"Yeah, Irene, these are my colleagues, Derek Morgan and Spencer Reid."

Irene reached out to shake their hands, eyeing up Morgan with only the slightest bit of shame, and laughing softly at Reid's polite avoidance of the gesture as he settled on a wave and a shy smile.

"We were hoping to ask you a few questions about the past week," Morgan said.

"Yeah, anything. Just give me a minute to clean this up and we can sit down."

***

"So, you used to work here?"

Y/N laughed, kicking Derek under the table. "Yep. Looks exactly the same as when I left, too. Only difference is that I'm not here to bring everyone in on Friday nights."

As Derek laughed, Spencer tensed up beside Y/N, and he started to play with his hands under the table they all sat at.

"She's not joking," Irene said as she approached the table with a smile. She took the seat next to Morgan and gave him a wink. "Petite Etoile over here was the main attraction."

Y/N groaned a little. "Oh, c'mon Irene, don't use my nickname here, that's not who I am anymore."

"Don't tell me you've lost your shine, Little Star." From the tone in her voice to the look on her face, it was clear to Y/N that Irene was just as devious as she'd been since the day they first met. "You know it would just break this town's heart."

"I highly doubt that... Besides, this little star shines just as brightly as it used to, thank you very much."

At that statement, Y/N felt Reid's knee hit the table with a loud thud. As Morgan questioned whether he was okay, she wondered what was running through his head. It didn't last long though, because shortly afterwards Morgan started asking questions about the case.

"Was it particularly crowded on the nights the dancers were killed?"

Irene hugged her arms to her stomach, her eyes drooping a little at the mention. "It gets pretty crowded every night to tell you the truth. But Friday nights are busiest. The nights Carrie, Lola, and Evelyn disappeared were just like any other night here."

"I know how hard it is to keep track of everyone, but is there anyone you might have noticed that seemed a little too lurk-y?" Even as she asked the question, Y/N felt like she already knew the answer.

And Irene really did seem to try to recall something, anything that could help, but she was visibly frustrated, tears welling in her eyes. "No, Y/N, I'm so sorry. After Carrie... the first time... we heightened security and everything, but it just wasn't enough, I... I don't know what to do."

Y/N reached across the table to grab her friend's hand. "It's okay, 'Rene. We're gonna figure this out, alright? I promise you."

Through tears, the blonde smiled and squeezed Y/N's hand. "I know you will, Little Star."

"Would it be possible for us to look at your surveillance tapes?" Reid asked quietly.

Irene looked up at him and nodded, still squeezing Y/N's hand. "Anything you need."

***

"So... Little Star, huh?"

Y/N rolled her eyes with a smile as she, Morgan, and Reid got into the car. When she got in the passenger seat, she waited for Morgan to be in the car before responding. "Oh, don't start. I swear to God, Derek, if you start calling me that I might just have to kick your ass."

"Well, you gotta at least tell me how you got the name?" he laughed, putting on his seatbelt while Reid climbed in the back.

"Well, how do you think? The place is called Starsight after all... So, Petite Etoile just made sense."

It was obvious that she was lying to get him to drop it, so Morgan kept pushing. "Okay, sure, but that's not the whole truth. Carrie, Lola, and Evelyn didn't have star names."

"Ugh, okay, fine, if I tell you will you shut up about it?"

"Promise."

Y/N caught a glimpse of Reid in the back through the rearview mirror. As expected, he was fidgety and just a little red.

She sighed and waited until Morgan pulled out of the parking lot to talk. "Okay. Once every month Starsight does a 'Midnight Sky' theme night. They light the place up in deep blue lights and everyone wears... space-themed outfits. Every dancer does their own special routine with songs and outfits that they pick on their own. My first time working a theme night, everyone seemed to really like what I did; I ended up doing an encore later in the night before we closed. Another dancer who worked with us at the time, Jenny, was learning French, so after my performance she called me Petite Etoile, and it just stuck."

"Okay, but why did you get the nickname and no one else?" Morgan asked with a smug smile. He knew she was still holding something back.

"Do you really want to know?"

"Yes, Y/N, I really want to know."

She sighed. "Let's... just say my outfit was... well, it barely covered me, and what it did manage to cover was covered by fabric in the shape of stars."

While Morgan laughed, Y/N looked in the mirror to see Reid with his head low, even more red than he was before. He was biting his bottom lip and fiddling the the seatbelt strap, and when his eyes briefly met hers in the mirror he was quick to avoid eye contact once again. If Y/N didn't find it completely adorable she would have felt more badly about it. But just to make sure, she called out to him.

"Reid, you okay back there?"

He looked up to meet her eyes again through the mirror, but only briefly before trying to ook anywhere else. "O-oh, yeah, I'm... I'm good."

Morgan laughed. "Yeah, I bet you are."

Y/N punched him in the arm and met Reid's eyes once more. "Sorry."

"Oh, you don't have anything to be sorry about, it's... it's okay, really, I-I'm not... it's..."

"Hey, don't worry about it," Y/N said calmly, giving him a reassuring smile. "We're all good here, right?"

"Right," Morgan and Reid said one after the other.

"Good. Now let's catch this creep."

***

Unfortunately no one had gotten much of anywhere in the next few hours. The security footage showed a man following each of the girls out of Starsight but there wasn't anything distinctive about him. Somehow he'd avoided all the cameras face to face, so he knew where they all were. And as for how he chose which dancers to target they weren't sure.

Until Irene walked into the station, that is.

"Y/N, I completely forgot something! I can't believe I missed it."

She stood before the team in the office that the station had given them for the time being, everyone else sitting down. Y/N stood up and nodded. "What is it?"

"Carrie, Lola, and Evelyn were all Spotlight Performers."

"What does that mean?" Elle asked from behind them.

Y/N turned to the group, her arms crossed. "Every other night Starsight spotlights a different dancer for a large performance at the end of the night, sort of like a grand finale before the club closes."

"So you're saying each of the girls was the Spotlight Performer on the nights they went missing?" Hotch asked, more like a clarification than a question.

"Yeah, Carrie on Saturday, Lola on Monday, and Evelyn on Wednesday," Irene said frantically.

Y/N reached out to grab her hand. "Well, it's Thursday. So, if he sticks to pattern, he's going after tomorrow's Spotlight Performer. Who do you have lined up?"

"Well, no one yet. After the murders the girls have been hesitant to schedule, and I don't blame them... So what should I do?"

Before Y/N could answer, Hotch did. "Y/L/N, you haven't gone undercover before, but I think it would be a good idea. You used to work at Starsight, you could lure him out."

She turned around sharply. "Oh, I... I don't know, Hotch, I haven't danced in so long, I'm not sure I—"

"He's right," Gideon interrupted. "It's the best chance we have at catching him."

Between Hotch and Gideon's opinions on the matter, Y/N knew she didn't have a say anymore.

"You still know your routine, Petite Etoile?" Irene asked, only slightly amused.

"Petite Etoile?" Elle wondered aloud.

Y/N heard Morgan laugh and she sighed.

***

"If I didn't know any better I'd say you were nervous," Irene said as she straightened another piece of Y/N's hair.

She played with the hem of the sheer robe she was wearing. "Well, I'm about to go undercover for the first time, stripping for the first time in years in front of all my colleagues so I can lure out a serial killer, so I guess you could say I'm a little nervous."

"Well... When you put it like that..."

Y/N looked up at her friend. "I'm sorry, Irene. Really, I'm okay, and we will get him, I promise."

"No, I know you will. I'm not worried. So... Who do they have watching you tonight?"

"Gideon and Hotch are outside, but Elle, Morgan, and Reid are in here with me. There are some extra officers all around the block, too, just in case."

"Hmm," Irene mused, and Y/N could tell she wanted to say something.

"What?"

"I don't know, it just surprises me they'd send Reid in here of all people. He seems almost more nervous than you."

Y/N laughed. "Well, when it comes to girls he gets a little nervous, but... he's good at his job."

"I'll take your word for it. But I also wouldn't be surprised if he short circuits when he sees you up there."

The thought made her smile a little, though she wondered how badly Morgan would tease him about the whole situation. Things between them all would no doubt be a little awkward for a while, but in no time they'd go back to normal like it never happened. At least that's what she told herself, because she wasn't sure what she'd do if her friendship with Reid was permanently damaged and awkward because of her past. The thought worried her just a little, but before she could get too psyched out, a knock at the door brought her back to reality.

"Y/N, it's Elle."

"Come on in!"

Y/N got up from the chair and turned around to meet Elle in the doorway. Her eyes wandered for a moment before nodding with a smirk. "Damn. Petite Etoile indeed."

Despite the nerves, Y/N smiled. "You here to give me an earpiece?"

Elle nodded and closed the door behind her. As she turned on the device and handed it to Y/N, she spoke. "You nervous?"

"A little, but it's just because I haven't done this in a while. Not to mention I'm doing it in front of everyone, and I'm luring out the unsub."

"No pressure, right?"

Y/N laughed, adjusting the earpiece and taking a deep breath. "It'll be fine. How long until I go on?"

"Five minutes. I'll be near the front with Reid. Morgan is in the back with a few officers, and everyone else is outside. We all have communication with you, so if we see him we'll let you know what to look out for."

"Got it."

"Y/L/N, can you hear me?" It was Hotch's voice through the earpiece.

"Yeah, loud and clear."

"Good. We're all in position. Whenever you're ready."

***

Elle met him near the front of the stage. To say he was nervous would be an understatement. Spencer didn't have a problem with strip clubs in the least, but it was bad enough that he'd thought about Y/N on multiple occasions in his dreams, now he was going to have to see her stripping just like he'd imagined many times over. The whole situation spelled out disaster, and if she didn't already know he had a crush on her, she most certainly would when the night was over.

As Elle approached him, he took a deep breath and stretched out his hands to calm his nerves. "She okay?"

Elle nodded. "Ready to go. I'm gonna stand on the other side of the stage, keep a look out for anyone who seems like he could be our guy."

"Right."

Before she left, Elle patted him on the shoulder and smiled knowingly. "Oh, and Reid... Try not to get distracted."

Yeah. He was fucked.

When the music that was playing stopped and the lights started to shift, Spencer took another deep breath. Irene's familiar voice came through the speakers.

"Thank you for coming to Starsight. Tonight's Spotlight Performer is a special one. Returning to the stage for the first time in years, shining brighter and better than ever before, give it up for our very own little star, Petite Etoile!"

A deep, seductive song that Spencer didn't recognize replaced Irene's voice as the lights shifted again, and the crowd around him applauded. It was just as crowded as it had been when he, Morgan, and Y/N met Irene the day before, but with a serial killer no doubt present and Y/N about to come on stage, everything felt heavier.

A dark silhouette broke through fog on the stage, and even though Spencer knew it was Y/N, it didn't feel real. He'd only ever seen her at work, in work clothes, and sometimes in casual clothes when they all went out for drinks on occasion.

So when she finally came into view, her hair tumbling down her back and shoulders rather than in a ponytail, and wearing almost nothing at all, he wasn't even sure it was her for a split second. But the way she looked, her magnetic presence and the way she carried herself across the stage was so remarkably her it was hard to miss. Everything about her confidence was elevated in that moment, and his own confidence—in his job and ability to function as a human being—was completely shattered when she caught his eye. It was just a split second, but that was all it took.

She must have noticed, because she gave him a small smile and a wink before turning her attention to the rest of the crowd as the music built. Spencer cleared his throat softly before glancing around, trying his best to scan everyone for anything suspicious. When he was sure there was nothing around him to be concerned about, he reluctantly let his eyes wander back to the stage.

By now Y/N had rid herself of the sheer robe that was on her, leaving her in a deep blue one-piece... contraption was the only word he could come up with. It was all connected by thin straps of fabric that weaved around every curve of her body, crisscrossing and leaving little to the imagination. Just like she'd described back in the car yesterday, small patches of fabric shaped like stars covered the front of her breasts and...

The second he looked down, she squatted, spreading her legs open and rolling her hips, exposing almost the entire front three rows of people to her barely-clothed pussy.

Spencer felt his cheeks grow warm as he quickly averted his gaze and pretended to survey the crowd again. To his credit, he did really search for anyone who could be the unsub, but the whole time he heard the song and the cheering crowd, and in turn Y/N occupied almost every corner of his brain.

When he finally had the courage to look at the stage again, she was making her way to a chair in the middle. Every step was on beat to the music and purposeful. She danced around the chair for a bit before another big beat drop in the song happened, and she squatted in front of it quickly, rolling her hips as she slowly got up.

Her eyes found his once more as she mouthed along to the words of the song, almost like she was singing directly to him. He wouldn't have thought anything of it, but she held his gaze for much longer than he'd been able to handle, and she knew exactly what she was doing. Which was made evident when she bit her bottom lip and ran her hands down her body, stopping at her knees before she sat in the chair and spread her legs, her hands finally dragging along the insides of her thigh.

Her eyes remained on him the entire time.

Butterflies immediately erupted in his stomach at her intensity, stronger than they'd ever been before. He'd always felt it when she affectionately ruffled his hair or patted his knee in passing, but now? She wasn't even touching him and he was about to crumble to the ground.

Thankfully something in his ear saved him from that. "I've got a visual." It was Morgan. "He's in the back, black long sleeve and jeans. Buzzcut. Y/N, look up at me and blink three times when you see him."

Reid looked up and and noticed her doing it. To anyone else it wouldn't have seemed out of pace, but he could tell she was a little rattled. In any case, she broke contact with Morgan and continued on with her performance as if nothing happened.

Though it meant there was most definitely a serial killer in the room and he would follow Y/N out of the club later, Spencer was glad for the past minute, because he wasn't sure how much more of the performance he could take. Suddenly there was a job to focus on again, and he was thankful for that.

***

"You're sure you're okay?"

Y/N laughed as she approached her motel room, phone in hand. "Yeah, Irene, I'm okay. Promise. He got a hold on me but my team was there to stop him before he did anything. No nicks or bruises or anything."

"Okay... You were great out there by the way. If you weren't such a kick-ass FBI agent now, I'd ask you to come back."

Laughing, she turned her head and noticed Reid at the end of the hall, walking to his room. He caught her eye and gave a shy smile before disappearing behind the door and closing himself off from her. She contemplated a moment before starting her journey to his room. "Well, I'm glad we could help. Maybe if I find myself in town again, I'll stop by."

"Yeah, you better. Though I'd prefer if a serial killer wasn't involved."

"You and me both. I'll come see you before we leave tomorrow morning, yeah?"

"Yeah. Goodnight, Petite Etoile."

With an affectionate roll of her eyes, Y/N nodded though her friend wouldn't be able to see. "Night."

She hung up and put the phone in her bag, taking a deep breath before knocking on Reid's door.

The answer was almost immediate. He stood before her, and it looked like he'd just gotten undressed, wearing grey pajama bottoms and a white tee shirt. "Oh, Y/N, h-hi," he stammered, pushing his glasses up his nose a little. "What's up?"

"Do you... mind if I come in? I know it might sound a little weird but I don't really want to be alone right now..." It was true. Though she was okay after catching the unsub, the idea of being alone after everything that happened was sure to leave a small ache that wouldn't let her sleep, and having company would make a good cure.

"Oh, no, that isn't weird at all. Uh, sure, come on in." He stepped aside and opened the door wider to let her through. She smiled gratefully as she passed him, careful to notice the faint color that adorned his cheeks.

When he closed the door behind them, she set her bag down on the floor and turned to meet him, playing with the sleeve of the FBI jacket she was wearing. Before leaving Starsight, she'd changed into underwear, leggings, and a thin tee shirt. She debated taking the jacket off, but knowing how much of her body her colleague and friend had no doubt seen that night, she figured for his sake she'd leave it on. At least for now.

"I know it's late and we should probably get to bed, but... Truthfully I don't know how well I'll be able to sleep."

Spencer seemed concerned. "You're... you're okay? He didn't hurt you badly, did he?"

"Oh! No, he didn't, I'm just... rattled, that's all. I'll be okay, really. It's just that I haven't... performed in a long time, and all of that added on to being serial killer bait was just... eventful. That's all."

"Well, if it makes you feel better, you were great."

Y/N raised an eyebrow, a small smirk playing at her lips. "Oh?"

"Oh, I mean at handling the unsub. Not that you weren't great at the other thing, of course! I just... I just meant that... I didn't mean... Um..."

"Hey, it's okay, I'm... I'm not mad or anything, I'm... flattered."

The redness on Spencer's face became more vivid under the dim glow of the room. "I- Really?"

Y/N smiled and took a step closer. "Mhmm. Y'know... Truthfully it was really hard for me not to look at you the whole time. Out of everyone in that whole room, I wanted to see only you."

His gaze wandered up and down her body briefly before meeting her eyes. "You did?"

"Mhmm," she said again. Her hand reached out to graze his bare arm, and he shivered under her light touch. "You can stop me if this is too weird, but... I really like you, Spence... Like, a lot. And, I think it's pretty obvious that you like me, too. Am I wrong?"

He swallowed. "Um... No. You're not wrong."

She was only inches away from him now, her hands gently caressing his shoulders and chest. She looked up at him through her eyelashes and smiled. "Do you want to kiss me as badly as I want to kiss you right now?"

"Um... T-truthfully I think I might want... to kiss you more..."

Y/N laughed and balled his shirt in one hand, the other snaking up to the back of his head and running through his hair. "Okay, then... You gonna prove it, or what?"

He bit his lip softly before leaning down and capturing her lips in a kiss that made her dizzy. Her hands tightened their grip on him, and the second her lips parted, he wasted no time gently swiping his tongue across her bottom lip, his confidence growing with every second. She groaned into him, pulling her body flush against his and forcing him to wrap his arms around her waist to keep steady.

They pulled away for air eventually, and by the gleam in his eyes when she looked at him, she knew exactly what she had to do.

"No one is rooming with you, right?"

"N-no. It's just me."

"Good." She whispered it seductively as she removed her hands from him and slowly unzipped her jacket, keeping eye contact with Spencer the whole time. Except, of course, when his eyes glanced down to see the progress the zipper was making. Once she slid it off her shoulders and let it drop to the floor, he took her in, his tongue dancing behind his lips.

She let him have a few more seconds before taking a step forward and kissing him again, both of her hands cradling his face and bringing her thumbs to gently rub his cheeks. He melted into her completely, wrapping his arms around her again in no time. While their kisses were slow and passionate for a minute, eventually they grew hungrier, and Y/N hadn't even realized they'd been moving until they were toppling onto the bed, Spencer falling back and her landing on top of him.

They broke apart only for a moment to adjust themselves, but went right back to each other once Y/N straddled his legs and he leaned back on his hands to keep himself upright.

Her hands played in his hair as she kissed him, each brush of her tongue against his sending him into a downward spiral. He'd only ever dreamed of this, and even then, this was better than any dream. Y/N herself was better than any dream.

She ground her hips against him, causing him to groan into her mouth, and he pushed himself forward to be closer, needing to be completely wrapped up in her for as long as he could. When she pulled her mouth from his and settled her hands on his shoulders to keep him from moving, he whined a little, the sound completely taking the both of them aback.

She smiled and cocked her head to the side. "I've thought about this for so long... You have no idea how many times I've wanted to kiss you since we met."

"Really?"

With a nod, Y/N toyed with the collar of his shirt, tugging it and slowly grinding her hips against him again. "Have you ever thought about it?"

It was a question they both obviously knew the answer to, but she wanted to have some fun. She loved seeing how shy he got, it made her want him even more.

"Yes... I... I think about you a lot," he breathed, blinking at her as she slid her hands down his chest and found the bottom of his shirt. She smiled and raised it up, her touch sending shivers all over his body.

"What have you thought about? Any specifics?" she asked once his shirt was all the way off. Her fingers found their way to his neck again as she pulled herself closer.

"Oh, I... Um... I-I've thought about... kissing you on the jet in front of everyone."

Y/N smiled and pushed his glasses up his nose, then traced her finger down over his lips and hooked it under his chin to tilt his head up, exposing his neck. "I've thought about that, too... You know what else?"

Spencer blinked at her, urging her to continue.

She leaned forward and kissed the underside of his jaw, then his neck, leaving small kisses in between every soft word. "I've thought about how good your hands would feel on me." Her hand grabbed one of his and brought it to rest on her side, slipping under her shirt. "Have you ever thought about touching me?"

"Yes," he breathed as she moved her mouth back up his jaw and to the corner of his mouth.

She brought her lips just inches from his, and he could feel them just barely as she spoke. "Do it. Please."

And then she let go of him, bringing both her hands to his face as she kissed him again. Her legs wrapped around him tighter as he used both of his hands to grip her sides. As soon as they knew they were stable enough not to fall backwards, Spencer slid his hands slowly up her torso and barely ghosted over her breasts. She could tell he was a little hesitant, so she pushed further into him, practically trapping his hands in between their chests. Her kisses grew deeper and more desperate as he palmed her breasts, letting a moan or two slip out to encourage him further.

Thankfully it worked, because with every passing second he got more confident with his touches. When Y/N moved her hips against his again, he sighed into her mouth and brought one of his hands out from under her shirt and to her head, running his fingers through her hair.

At this point he was noticeably hard beneath her, and she was desperate to feel more of him. So Y/N peeled herself away from Spencer and snuck her hand down to play with the waistband of his pants. "You wouldn't happen to have a condom on you, would you?"

"Oh, uh, a-actually Morgan gave me one as a joke last week. It's, uh, in my wallet. In my bag."

Y/N laughed. "Sounds like him. Why don't you go grab it."

He nodded as she got up off of him. While he walked over to his bag, Y/N quickly removed her shirt and leggings, leaving her only in a pair of thin black panties that were almost too small. Before he turned around, she sat back on the edge of the bed and spread her legs wide, leaning back on her elbows as she waited.

If she didn't know any better she would have thought that when he turned around, his eyes were going to fall out of his head. He took small steps towards the bed, and she made the 'come here' motion with her finger. "Take your pants off for me?"

He all but scrambled to get them off, and Y/N smiled affectionately at him as she watched, hoping to calm his nerves by letting him know that he had nothing to be nervous about.

But just to be sure, she told him as much anyway. "You've got nothing to worry about, Spence. Trust me, I... I want this."

Once his pants were off, he met her at the edge of the bed, standing in between her legs. "I do too, I just... It's just that I've only ever... done this before once, and... I'm not very experienced, and I don't want to disappoint you."

Y/N sat up and grabbed his hips, leaning forward to press small, soft kisses to his stomach as she looked up at him. "You could never disappoint me. Promise."

Once she was sure he was a little more relaxed, she moved her kisses lower, until they reached the waistband of his underwear. She hooked her fingers under it and slid them down slowly, keeping eye contact with him until they dropped to the floor. Only then did she look down at his dick, and it was even better than she imagined.

Giving a satisfied hum, she pressed a soft kiss to the tip and fluttered her eyes up to meet his, the look on his face completely awe-struck. She took the tip of his dick in between her lips and sucked gently, swirling her tongue around it as she watched his mouth fall open, a sigh escaping. She could tell he was holding back a little, so she traced her finger along the length of him and kept sucking lightly at the tip, hoping to get some noise out of him.

Y/N took him in her mouth completely, bobbing her head up and down just a few times to get him wet before removing her lips with a pop. When she gripped him firmly with one hand and steadily began to stroke him, he finally gave her what she hoped for.

"Y/N," he groaned, just above a whisper. His eyes were closed, but he opened them when she stopped.

"You wanna put it on or should I?" she asked.

"Spencer turned the small packet over in his hand before nodding. "I can do it."

Y/N scooted farther onto the bed and slid off her panties as he got to work, and thankfully he wasn't as nervous anymore. He moved to take off his glasses, but she stopped him. "Keep them on?"

The devious grin on her face made him blush, and he nodded, crawling over the top of her and pressing tentative kisses to her stomach, only he travelled downward instead of up to her mouth.

"You don't have t—"

"I want to," he reassured, kissing her inner thighs. "Truth be told, Y/N, I've thought about doing this, too. Is that okay?"

"Yes," she responded clearly, extremely turned on by the needy tone in his voice.

Almost immediately after she answered, his tongue darted out to taste her, swiping gently over her clit and sending her into a state of speechlessness. She leaned up on her elbows to watch as Spencer took his time, exploring and savoring every inch of her. She knew now why he'd wanted to take his glasses off, but if anything the sight of them riding up his face as he ate her out made the whole thing even hotter.

"Fuck, Spence, that... that feels so fucking good," she breathed, trying to keep her eyes open to look at him but ultimately failing.

Her words emboldened him, and he slipped a finger slowly inside her, his tongue paying special attention to her clit. He worked them together in a slow, sensual rhythm that eventually drove her to the edge. And she told him so.

"You're gonna make me cum," she breathed, willing herself to open her eyes. She found him staring up at her as best as he could in his position, the hungry sparkle in his eye pushing her further. What finally pushed her over the edge was when he sucked gently on her clit and groaned against her as she called out his name. Everything blinded her for a moment as she rocked her hips against his face, needing to hang on to every last second of her orgasm.

When she finally came down, Spencer pulled away and adjusted his glasses, to which Y/N bit her lip and moaned once more. "You're sure you've only ever done this once?"

He laughed a little, sucking his fingers clean with a shrug before answering. "Yeah, but I'm a quick-study."

Y/N smiled and reached one of her arms out to him. "Come here, quick-study."

The two of them smiled as their lips found one another, her hands flying to his hair once again. His hands gripped her waist, and his dick pressed up against her lower stomach, making her groan against him.

Without another word, Y/N hooked her legs around his waist and shifted their weight, rolling them over so she was straddling him now. Spencer reached up to move her hair to one side of her face, and then soon after she sat up, placing her hands on his chest.

"I'll tell you something else I've thought about," she said lowly, scratching down his chest just lightly enough to give him goosebumps. She then used one of her hands to grip his dick and lifted her hips up, running the head of him through her wetness as she looked down at him. "I've thought about how good you would look while I ride you. More than once, actually."

She sank down onto him, just a little, and his face sure enough twitched in pleasure, making Y/N smile to herself. "What about you? You ever imagine me riding this pretty cock?"

"Fuck, Y/N, yes, I— Oh my god..."

She sat down completely, rocking her hips forward a little and pressing her hands harder into his chest. "Fuck, you feel so good..."

She set a slow pace, making sure to pay extra attention to Spencer's face as she worked him. Just like she'd done before, he seemed to have a hard time keeping his eyes open, but his hands gripped her hips so tightly she was sure they'd leave bruises. The thought of that spurred her on, and she picked up the pace, bouncing steadily on his cock.

"Ohhh, fuck," she groaned, her hands leaving his torso to grab her breasts. He opened his eyes and watched her, letting out a soft moan of his own. His hands slid up her sides and under hers, replacing them with his own firm grip. She leaned forward a little so he wouldn't have to reach up that far, placing both of her hands on either side of his waist.

"Tell me," she managed to say as she continued riding him. "You ever think about fucking me at work? In the round-table room or over my desk? I know I have..."

He continued to pinch and pull at her nipples while barely being able to keep his eyes open. "Y-yes... Fuck, Y/N, I think about you all the time..."

"Feeling's mutual. Sit up for me?"

Spencer opened his eyes and she helped him sit up. They adjusted for a second before she wrapped her arms around his neck and started moving again, rocking her hips into his and giving him a better angle to hit inside her deeper.

"Fuck, baby, you feel so good," she breathed against his lips before she kissed him, missing the feel of his lips on hers. Their bodies clung together perfectly, every movement feeling better than the last, until they were both obviously close to coming undone.

Sure enough, the moment she squeezed her legs together and clenched herself around him, he groaned into her mouth and bucked his hips forward. "Y/N... I..."

She pressed her forehead to his and tugged at his hair, quickening her pace just a little and feeling herself geting close as well. Any moment now and she would feel it.

"Me, too," she breathed, brushing her nose against his. Within a matter of seconds, they were both unraveling, sighing out each others' names and holding on to each other for dear life as they rode out their highs.

Eventually Y/N slowed her hips to a stop, and she slumped against him, pressing one final kiss to his lips before she got off his lap and pulled him down to lay beside her, immediately snuggling into his side and burying her face in the crook of his neck.

"So, was that better than you imagined?" she murmured against his neck, pressing kisses along collarbone.

Spencer laughed and pulled her even closer. "Even better. No dream could ever do you justice."

She smiled, feeling herself growing sleepy. "You sap... But, for the record, I could say the same thing about you."

"Really?" He seemed genuinely curious.

Y/N looked up at him and smiled, tracing patterns on his chest with her fingertips. "Really. I wasn't kidding, Spence, I think about you... probably more often than I should. You're distracting."

"I'm distracting?" he mused. "You're... you. Seriously, it's a surprise I haven't completely made a fool of myself around you since we met. Especially after we all found out about your other job."

"Right... That doesn't... weird you out, does it?"

"That you used to be a stripper?"

She nodded, truthfully a little worried. She wasn't sure why, but it had always been a problem in her previous relationships, and she'd gotten used to that.

"No, of course that doesn't weird me out. I mean, I was definitely more intimidated around you, and I figured you were completely out of my league... Truthfully, I think you still might be."

"Oh, don't sell yourself short, Doctor. You're perfect, and really, if anyone was out of anyone's league here, it would be me. I'd be lucky to have you in any capacity, you know that, right?"

He blushed, bringing his forehead to rest against hers again. "Well... In any case, I really do like you, and... If it's not too weird, maybe you'd want to go out sometime?"

Warmth bloomed in her chest as she reached out and grabbed his hand, lacing their fingers together. "Of course. I would love to."

***

"Make it stop," Y/N whined, covering her ears with the pillow.

Spencer stirred beside her, barely awake himself. The knocking at the door wasn't stopping, and in a huff of annoyance, Y/N decided she'd had enough.

"We're getting up!"

She only realized what she did after the door opened and Elle walked in, a shit-eating grin on her face. "Oh my God, you were in here last night! I came by your room and tried calling..."

Y/N and Spencer both froze, completely awake and now well aware of the fact that someone else knew about their... sleeping arrangement.

"Uh, yeah... Yeah, I was here. Sorry if I worried you," Y/N stammered, trying to keep her cool. "I-I promised Irene I'd stop by this morning for breakfast before we left, so I should probably do that. Do, um... Do you mind?"

Elle laughed, giving the two of her friends a once-over before nodding. "Sure thing, Little Star. Oh, and uh... Good for you, Reid, proud of you."

"Elle," Y/N groaned, clutching the covers tighter around her bare torso.

"Right. Don't be too late."

After she left, Y/N leaned over to Spencer and rubbed his arm. "I'm sorry. I probably should have—"

He stopped her by pressing his lips to hers in a soft kiss. When he pulled away, his hand brushed the hair from her face and he smiled. "It's fine. I don't care who knows. I mean, as long as you don't, Petite Etoile..."

He said it with a grin reminiscent of the one Elle had just adorned, and it made Y/N laugh. She kissed him again and ruffled his hair. "I'm gonna get you for that."

"What? It suits you."

"You are not calling me by my stripper name. It's bad enough Elle and Morgan are probably gonna call me that for the rest of my life, I don't need it from you, too." She smiled as she said it, hoping that he knew she was only joking.

Either way, Spencer looked at her adoringly and took her hand in his. "Well, then... how about I just call you mine?"

"I like the sound of that."

#spencer reid x reader #criminal minds #criminal minds fanfiction #spencer reid #spencer reid smut #criminal minds smut

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startanewdream · 3 years

Text

Don't drink and kiss

For @everythinghasreason. Happy (early) birthday! 🎈🎉

(Link on AO3 later)

Rated T; 2.5k.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"You didn't kiss me last night," Lily says, the words leaving her lips before she can control herself, very much like everything she remembers saying the night before.

Specifically an impromptu admission of exactly how she feels about her fellow Head Boy, who looks at her now with a startled expression on his face, the grin he had been spotting ever since she had first seen him in the morning slowly melting away from his lips. He watches her face as if he is trying to read her thoughts—and isn’t happy with whatever he is seeing there.

For a moment she thinks James will turn his back to her, ignoring her altogether, but then he shrugs, putting his hands in his pockets as if to keep him from messing his hair, and his face rearranges its features in the most carefree expression he has ever spotted.

"You were drunk," he says as if she needs a reminder, as if her head hasn't been buzzing all morning.

"So?" Her voice is still relenting on a strange bravado. Lily wonders if the alcohol is still fuelling her. "So were you."

"So I was," he agrees slowly. "And perhaps I'd rather snog someone who will remember it the next day."

"I would have."

James blinks, unsmiling. "I don't think so."

"I remember talking to you. And I… I said things, James. I know I did."

His eyes flash with something she doesn't understand. "That bit about how you can't stop thinking about me? Pretty sure you were talking to the firewhiskey."

His tone is teasing, but Lily hears the heaviness and while she'd thought that James would find some joy in hearing her confession, a sudden fear grips her heart. Perhaps she misunderstood everything: their banter, their conversations, their distracted touches. Their flirting. Perhaps he was never flirting back with her.

Shame floods her. Now she understands why he hasn't kissed her. Gods, how foolish did she act?

"Yeah, I drank too much," she agrees, voice dry, accepting his easy way out. "I will pay more attention next time."

He takes a second longer than necessary to answer her. "Already planning the next hangover, Evans? I am actually impressed."

She laughs, humourless as it is.

"One can never promise something they won't fulfill, Potter."

James looks at her, eyes searching for something in her face that Lily doesn't understand, before he takes a step back.

"You are right on that," he says, chagrinned, and with a nod from his head, he turns away from her.

She can’t help but feel as if she disappointed him somehow.

______

Lily picks up piece by piece what happened that night.

It's like solving a jigsaw puzzle. The borders she already has, all those pieces that remind her how loose she had felt with the first taste of firewhiskey, fuelled by a desire to do something daring.

James is there in those pieces, telling her to go easy even as he is already tipsy with his own shots of alcohol. It was his cautious caring warning that made her get her second taste, urging herself to just tell him how she felt.

By the third shot she called him for a dance, though they didn't dance as far as she remembers—the alcohol was enough for getting her the nerve to do it, not the ability. She remembers how they mostly tripped over each other, laughing and falling on a couch.

There is a gap between the fourth and the fifth shot, but she remembers that by the sixth shot they were together in a corner of the room, and staring at him, the words spilled out of her. The alcohol had acted as some kind of protection, a barrier against any fear, as Lily told James exactly what she had been feeling for him for a while now.

That's how far Lily has, so she collects the other pieces by hearing conversations, asking nonchalant questions to her friends, to his friends.

No one seems to know all the details, but from Mary she gathers how they slowly danced at some point that Lily attributes to the fourth or the fifth shot. Remus mentions watching James returning to their dorm very late in the night, grinning as if he had just won the Quidditch cup. Dorcas asks her if they are going out because she saw them holding hands at the end of the party. Sirius grumpily tells her she is a fool and refuses to say anything else.

Lily has a good picture by now, incomplete as it is. If her jigsaw puzzle was a painting of Hogwarts, she would have the lake and the forest already, but the castle, the center of the puzzle, it's still blank.

Then her dreams help her.

They don't make sense and at first Lily blames her imagination for just shaping everyone’s comment into what she wants. From Mary's comment, Lily dreams of her arms around James' neck, playing softly with his hair while he holds her waist, their feet moving together though they aren't really moving. Dreams aren't supposed to be this sensorial, but she swears she wakes up feeling his musky scent, the softness of the curls of his hair, as if he was there with her.

From Dorcas' tale, Lily dreams of steady hands, of feeling the callousness due to years of Quidditch practice, of a warmth that ran from his body to hers as they experimented holding hands, fingers intertwined together. He holds their joint hands, raises them and places a kiss at the back of her hand. Then he brings their hands over his heart; it’s beating fast, and it's because of her.

Neither Mary or Dorcas' tales were so colourful, so vivid, but Lily dreams of it and the edges of the castle are visible by then.

But no one tells her anything else and still Lily dreams more.

She thinks of hazel eyes shining with her confession, a hand touching her face, putting strands of her hair out of her face and leaving a trace of fire where he touches her.

She thinks of a sigh, hand falling back and a hopeless voice. You are just drunk, Evans, you don't mean that.

But she does, and she tells him and she makes a dangerous promise. He stares at her for some time, still unsure, but she knows there is only truth in her face. Then he believes in her, leans closer very slowly, still giving her plenty of time to draw back, to give up, to say she doesn’t want this.

Lily doesn’t remember much from that night, but she knows she wanted that kiss. She wanted him, long before she got her first taste of alcohol.

Her puzzle is almost complete, only two or three pieces missing that she can’t seem to place right. It feels as if she is assembling that puzzle in the dark, hoping the pieces will fit but unable to see the whole picture. She thinks of soft lips and warm hands, taste of firewhiskey and a musky smell, her name in a sigh, being held in place to keep from falling apart and she knows she would if not for him.

Her heart quickens when she realizes there is only one last piece missing, and a longing for something she should remember, but can’t, floods her.

A week after the first Quidditch match—a week during which, almost displicently, James avoids her—Lily seeks for him at last.

His friends are there in the Common Room, talking quietly to each other, but James isn’t in sight. She approaches them carefully; Remus and Peter nod at her, but Sirius frowns unhappily, giving her the same hard look he has thrown at her all week.

“Hey,” she calls, keeping her voice light. “Do you know where James is?”

“Why?” Sirius asks, crossing his arms and ignoring Remus’ nudge. “Decided to mess up with him a little more?”

Lily bites her lip. “No, the opposite.”

“Quite late for that—”

“He went for a fly,” Remus says, cutting Sirius. “You might find him in the Quidditch pitch.”

“Thanks,” says Lily, looking outside. The sun is setting. Then she glances back at Sirius. “I really want to fix this.”

“Then stay sober,” he says, and Lily flinches, but she supposes Sirius is right.

The walk to the Quidditch pitch is long, and her heart paces up with each step Lily takes. She knows what puzzle she is finishing by now, and she knows what piece she is missing, but despite her best efforts, she can't find it.

It bothers her a lot.

No wonder James is mad at her.

She doesn't see him flying in the Quidditch pitch and she is almost going back to the castle when she spots a lonely figure in the benches. She would recognize that messy hair anywhere, so she ventures the stairs to reach him.

James doesn’t turn to look at her, not even when the benches crack under her weight, doesn’t blink when she sits next to him and she wonders if he could recognize her from a distance as well.

“No more flying for today?” she asks, her voice light, eyeing the broomstick next to him.

He shrugs. “I didn’t actually fly. Thought about it, but then…” He grabs a bottle on his other side, lifts it in a mock salutation. “Drinking was better.”

And to prove his point, he takes a generous sip of the bottle.

“Getting drunk alone? That is just sad, Potter.”

There is a soft sight that could be scornful, but just sounds sad. “Tried getting drunk together. Didn’t work for me.”

She swallows dryly. “No, I guess not. I...I really messed that up, didn’t I?”

At this, James finally looks at her. His hazel eyes sweep over her face, in search of something that he doesn’t seem sure about, because he asks: “Did you remember after all?”

There is the faintest hope in his voice and Lily hates herself for being unable to give him the answer she wanted to have. “No.”

“Oh.” He runs his hand through his hair, closing his eyes for a moment. When he opens them, his face shines with guilt and regret. “Look, Evans, there is something—”

“We kissed,” she cuts him off, nodding, knowing it even as her mind is unable to actually grasp that memory.

James tilts his head slightly to the side and Lily wonders if he did the same while they were kissing. She has been wondering a lot these days, hating that blank space in her mind that she wishes more than anything she could fill.

“We did,” he admits, but there is none of the particular happiness Lily would associate with it. James looks just miserable. “And I am really sorry about it, I didn’t want to take advantage of—”

“You didn’t,” she assures him, fidgeting with her hands, fighting back an urge to just hold his hands.

“You don’t even remember it, Lily.”

“I remember enough. I remember telling you how I felt.”

“That was the firewhiskey talking, not—”

“The firewhiskey gave me courage, not words. What I felt—what I feel—had nothing to do with how much I drank.”

He shakes his head stubbornly. “Still, I should have known better. I shouldn’t have—”

“There is only one thing I’m truly sorry, James. And that’s for promising you I would remember and then—”

“You didn’t.”

“I broke my word,” she agrees, sorrowful. “Can… can you forgive me for that?”

He blinks, staring at her for a long minute before grabbing the bottle next to him and reading the label. “Maybe there is some kind of insanity essence here.”

“What?”

“I can’t believe you’re saying you’re sorry for forgetting it, not for what we did. I spent this whole week feeling horrible for leading you—”

“Is it so hard to believe that I fancy you?”

His gaze strays back to her.

“It depends. What have you drunk today?”

Lily smiles softly. “I haven’t had a sip of alcohol today.” She hesitates a second before sliding on the bench, closer to him. “I can let you get close to check if you want.”

James almost smiles too. “I’ll trust your word.”

“James—” she touches his hand now, watching him carefully for any sign he is repelled by her, but she finds none. His eyes fall to her hand and he watches with fascination as her hand traces his fingers, climbs over his arm, reaches his neck. She touches his hair, sees him shuddering under her touch; his skin is warm with the alcohol. “I really like you. And I would very much like to kiss you again for the first time.”

He sighs, his smile tender now. Lily expects him to move even closer, to close that annoying breach between them, but instead all he does is hold her hand, leaning into it and closing his eyes, before he kisses softly her wrist, over her pulse. His lips are warm.

When he opens his eyes, James just shakes his head. “I’m seeing you double and while it’s actually very nice seeing two Lily Evans, I think I should go.”

“Sure,” she says, hoping to not betray her disappointment. He rises, swinging dangerously on the spot, and she takes a step closer. “Help?” she offers.

James nods, accepting when Lily places her arm around his waist, steadying him.

The walk back to the castle is silent, but Lily doesn’t think it’s heavy. For all his silence, James seems to be only thoughtful. They ignore everyone else’s look and because he doesn’t complain, she helps him get back all the way to his dorm, until he is sitting on his bed.

James holds her hand as she is turning to leave him alone. His eyes are burning, but if anything, he looks only resolute.

“Would you like to go to Hogsmeade with me next weekend?”

“Is this alcohol talking?” she asks teasingly. He grins.

“You know, alcohol gives courage, not—”

“Not words,” she finishes for him. “I’d love to go with you. With one condition.”

“I don’t throw up over you right now?”

Lily laughs. “That would be nice, yeah, but actually, I would reinforce a non-alcohol policy.”

“Only butterbeer,” he agrees, beaming. And then before she can say anything, he approaches her face, tugs strands of her hair behind her ear and places a kiss at her cheek, his lips barely touching the corner of hers.

For the warmth that spreads from where his lips touch her down her body, Lily feels drunk again.

“See you tomorrow, Evans,” says James, laying more comfortably against the pillow in his bed, lips curved into a hopeful smile.

“I’ll wait for you with a Hangover Potion,” she promises him, watching him fondly.

“And that’s why I love you,” he whispers, sighing, and he closes his eyes, falling into a quick sleep.

Courage, she thinks. Not words.

Hopefully he will remember this little declaration the next day.

#Jily #Sentence Starter Prompts #Jily Fanfiction #There are so many lovely fics with tipsy Lily #and James is all chivalrous #wanted to write one where things happen #but not in the traditional way #well let me know what you think

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