#ever get a bug stuck in ya ear?

[twstwonderlandstuff]

Hi ! I just realized your request are open ! First of all congratulations for 500 follower 🎂🥳 !! My request are for Riddle Rosehearts, Ruggie Bucchi, Epel Felmier and Lilia Vanrouge, (romantic kinda, they have a crush ?) in form of a headcanons : gn!reader take something of their hair without warning and end up grazing their ear or their neck, hehe~ i thought it was a cute idea and would like to read it from you if you accept it ! ❤

let's go! gotta love moments in pining~!

reqs open!

a/n: ALSO, I changed Lilia's and Epel's trope a bit so it doesn't get boring! I do hope that's okay.

🍒 Riddle is already a nervous wreck around you, so when he sees your hand fly up against your hair, he freezes, too scared, or really, too nervous to move.

🍒 He looks up at your face, thanking the Great Seven that you don’t notice him staring at your features. 

🍒 When your hand accidentally strays down to his ear, he squeaks, quickly pulling your hand away from him and holding his ear, unable to make eye contact.

🍒 Then when you reveal that its a fallen leaf you picked from his hair he’s one, mortified that his appearance isn’t as clean as he thought and two, you touched his ear!

🍒 It burns bright red as he begins to yell at you, something nonsensical that doesn’t even make sense to him because of how flustered he is.

🍒 “I- Don’t touch my ears- The rules state- ah- j-just please leave me alone for now!”

🌹 But you don’t mind his lecture. Not when he looked that cute.

🌹 He’ll lament this failure of his to Trey and Cater later on, cursing himself for what he’s done. 

🍒 Ruggie is more cool with the entire thing; he’s got a crush on you, cool, yeah, and he’s happy you’ve gotten close enough to pet him without warning.

🍒 But when you brush against his ear repeatedly, like trying to wade something off, an embarrassing sound threatens to leave him.

🍒 Its a sort of laughing response, but its not the usual laugh he has. No, this one’s a laugh used for people closest to him, like his grandmother- and it’s bubbling up because you’re touching his ears-!

🍒 He grabs both of your hands with a growl, and brushes off his embarrassment with a joke.

🍒 “Oi, whatcha think you’re doin’, prefect? Petting my ears are gonna cost ya, ya know~”

🍒 And when you reveal a pestering lint, or material of some sort has been stuck in his hair, and not because you want to pet him…

🌹 He’ll be rolling around in his pillow for quite some time.

🍒 You know Epel doesn’t like being called dainty and cute- he truly doesn’t, but when he’s sitting under an apple tree and the lights are coming down from the leaves in patches that cling onto him like second skin, he certainly looks like it.

🍒 But then you spot something- a bug on his neck that he doesn’t seem to notice, still happily chattering to you about his hometown.

🍒 You suddenly reach out, grabbing his shoulder on one hand and aiming for his neck with the other.

🍒 But the bug is a persistent little shit, so it takes a couple of tries before you finally get it, but when you do, there’s bug goo all over his neck (gross). You do the honors of rubbing your thumb over it a couple of times, and its gone.

🍒 You pull back to find Epel staring at you with wide eyes and stained cheeks. Ooh, right. An explanation is probably due.

🍒 “There was a… bug.” You say, raising your bug goo covered thumb, wiping it on your shirt. “Did I startle you? Sorry, I didn’t mean to.”

🍒 “‘S… fine.” Epel mumbles in his country accent. “Ya can go wash it off in the sink.”

🍒 You leave, and as soon as your back is turned, Epel buries himself on his thighs, grumbling. How DARE you look so focused and cool when you do it?! How dare you breathe down on him, making his heart pitter-patter like he’s just seen Vil? How dare you make him feel so… so… so girly and, and… and whatever these mushy feelings do to him?! How could you, how could you?!

🌹 He won’t even look at you when you come back. WHY?!

🍒 Lilia thinks you’re the cutest thing ever (except for Silver. And Sebek. And Malleus. ...basically his kids). Here you are, taking his heart captive and acting so nonchalant about it. It’s not everyday you have a… centuries? No, eons? …how-many-years-old fae crushing on you. 

🍒 Your overly calculated methods of surprising him never fail to make him giggle when you fail and give him a pout. Aw, geez, you’re just making him want you even more at this rate!

🍒 So it comes as a surprise to both you and Lilia when you surprise him and you were so subtle at it, too.

🍒 You’re chilling in his room, you know, as friends do- Lilia’s focused on a game, and you’re just watching when unexpectedly, you reach out to pat his hair. You don’t say anything, but your hand roams down to his ear, then his neck.

🍒 He drops his controller and stifles an embarrassed laugh, asking if his neck interests you that much.

🌹 You should bite it. NO I SAID NOTHING

🍒 “Yeah, kinda. It’s really pretty. Your ears too. Can I touch ‘em?”

🍒 Lilia’s face is uncharacteristically red, a hand on his mouth, with his hair flying up like in animes. 

🍒  Its a fae thing, you see, for the ears and neck to be awfully sensitive spots, and you brushed on them like they were nothing. You’re even saying you like them?! Puh-lease, no one’s ever made his heart pound quite like this before.

🌹 Maybe you should start making excuses to massage his neck and ears more often.

#BLUSHING LILIA LET'S GOOOOO #SENSITIVE FAE PARTS YEAHHHHHH #MUAHAHAHA EXPLOITATION #ok actual tags #lilia vanrouge #twisted wonderland #twst wonderland #twst #ruggie bucchi x reader #ruggie bucchi #lilia vanrouge x reader #epel felmier #epel felmier x reader #riddle rosehearts x reader #riddle rosehearts #twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader #gn reader #gender neutral reader #twst headcannons #twisted wonderland headcannons #cherry picking

[calzone-d]

Could you write a Ted Lasso story about the reader not feeling good enough and anxious? I love your writing!

of course, anon! i made this into a little blurb for ya. i’ve been feeling pretty anxious lately myself, and opening up about it to my partner has been scary, but i’m glad i did! find a good partner who listens to you and validates your feelings!! ❤️

warnings: anxiety, reader feeling a teensy bit depressed maybe

masterlist

A pang hit your chest as soon as you saw the picture. They all looked so happy. Ted, with his arm around Michelle, who had a beaming Henry in her lap. The sounds of the world went quiet as your thoughts took over.

It’s not like this was a normal occurrence. Lately, the weather had just been so cold and gloomy. Getting out of bed the past few days just seemed harder. Deep down, you knew it would pass, just as it always did. That didn’t make it any easier right now, though.

“Y’ready, sweetheart?”, Ted’s soft voice broke you out of your trance.

The two of you flew to Kansas to bring Henry back to Richmond for the next two weeks. He had a break from school and always loved coming to visit when he could. Every single time, he pulled out all the stops to try and stay later than originally planned.

“Yeah I’m.. I’m good, Ted.”, you knew you didn’t sound convincing.

Ted’s mouth opened, and you knew he wasn’t sold on your response. Before he could speak Henry’s excited voice echoed through the hall.

“I’m ready! Can we go now, please?”, he bounced on the balls of his feet as you and Ted each grabbed one of his bags.

“Yeah, Henry Bug. Let’s go get you in the car. I’ll uh.. You can say your goodbyes and then come join us, Ted.”

You knew if you gave him time he’d tell you once more that he felt nothing for her anymore. Nothing that went past respecting her as a co-parent, and sometimes that took everything in him.

Henry talked your ear off as you helped him get settled in your rental car, but you wouldn’t trade it for the world. He had become like your own son, coming to you with his feelings and problems, calling when something new happened. The boy had stolen your heart just as quickly as his father did.

Ted took more time lingering in the house than you loved to think about. You didn’t say anything as he got in the drivers seat.

It wasn’t until you were in the airport until he mentioned it, which you were thankful for. You didn’t want him bringing it up in front of Henry, as Michelle was a topic you three generally avoided talking about.

“What’s goin’ on?”

Your words seemed stuck in your throat as you tried to speak. You knew there was no point in lying to him.

With a shaky voice you replied, “Do you ever want your old family dynamic back? O-or wish that we had something more similar?”.

“Sweetheart, where on earth is that com in’ from? Did I say somethin’?”, his eyebrows furrowed. His bags dropped to his sides as he stepped forward to bring you into his arms.

“No I just.. I was looking at the picture of you guys in the hallway..”, you noticed the way your hands began to shake and your throat grew tight. “And then when it took you a second to come to the car I just- I don’t know.”

Your eyes began to grow misty as he pulled your head to his chest. “I’ve just been feeling anxious lately. I know it’s stupid for me to even ask you that, I just-“

“It’s not stupid, not one bit. Look, hun. That picture was a very, very long time ago, you know that. So much has changed, and shoot, I’m glad it has. Things are completely different now and that’s somethin’ I wouldn’t trade for anything in the world.”

You nodded as you quickly dabbed at your eyes, hoping you could look somewhat decent before Henry came back.

“And I stayed in so long to ask Michelle about lettin’ Henry stay an extra weekend. I know y’all wanted to go to that Lego store you told him about.”, his eyes were full of love as he looked down at you. While you took a few deep breaths, he softly smoothed a hand over the back of your head. A breathy chuckle left your lips at the thought of taking Henry to the lego store.

“Y/n, M’all yours. Every bit of me, darlin’. There’s not one person or thing on this earth that’s gon’ change that, you hear me?”

Ted’s eyes were locked on yours the whole time. You nodded at him with rosy cheeks. After a second, you saw Henry make his way back to you, and pulled Ted in for a brief hug.

“I love you, Ted. Thank you.”, you whispered in his ear. Before he pulled away you pressed a quick kiss to his cheek.

The smile it brought to your face was enough to melt your heart.

“What about me?”, Henry’s voice came from behind you.

“What about you, hun?”, you turned to look at him.

“Well I want a hug too, please.”, this time you laughed louder as you crouched down to bring him in for a big hug. His small arms wrapped around your neck as you squeezed him tight.

Behind his back you locked eyes with Ted as he stared down at you two.

“Come on you two, let’s get on that plane and finally go home, how ‘bout that?”

Thanks for reading! Requests are open!

#ted lasso #ted lasso imagine #ted lasso fic #ted lasso fanfic #ted lasso x reader #ted lasso fluff #ted lasso henry #dad!ted #dad!ted superiority #michelle slander not sorry #come on henry i’ll be ur mom

[twosroos]

All Grown Up [Chapter 2]

roos says ! yes the gif is rhett abbot, i know, shhhhh. closed proximity? yes. also, protective bob is a new favorite of mine :)

desc: bob's missed probably more than one big event, a dinner and a thunderstorm seem to tell you God-- or just fate wants you to talk it out.

notable characters: robert "bob" floyd

TWs: desc. of past abuse, narcissism, and gaslighting. cursing, mentions of fighting, threats

ao3 link ! previous chapter ! next chapter

Your plan of horse training fell out of your mind as you stood, watching both Molly Floyd and your sister as they toddled around with the horses. And it especially died when Molly called to your sister, “we should get Robby to ride Fuego when he gets here from the store!”

Shit. You were not ready for this. Not now, not ever.

“Ma, I have some laundry and such to do—“ you call across the field where she stands, watching the girls as they feed Fuego apple treats when he does little tricks you’d taught your sister to do with her. She’s now teaching Molly the same ones. You bite your lip before you speak up again, “Can I run home and do that for a bit before coming back later?”

“Are you sure you don’t wanna run Fuego before it gets hot?” Your mom asks, sending you a look. When you meet her eyes with a bugged-out look in them, she huffs, waving you over. Slumping your shoulders, you make a slow walk to where she stands by the fence because you already know what she’s gonna say. She’ll tell you to talk to Robert, then say how much he’s missed you or something along those lines.

“Talk to Robby.” Your mother murmurs, “lord knows he’s missed ya.”

‘Two for two,’ you think bitterly.

“Ma, it’s been like… nine years since he moved away. And it’s been five years since we last spoke in person. We’ve texted like… once every other month, sometimes even longer, since that thanksgiving party when his mom forced us to talk and gave him my number.” You grumble, looking away so your mother can’t see the genuine upset look in your eyes, “I don’t think there’s any more dynamic duo.”

“Yes, there is, you’re just being stubborn. I don’t know what happened between the two of you before he left, but c’mon. You both were twenty the last time you spoke in person, and it was awkward as hell to watch, now you’re both twenty-five.” she sighs, “Get your head out of your ass.”

“My head is nowhere near my ass, excuse you,” you say, but find you want to be like an ostrich in the sand when a beater Chevy pick-up pulls up to the barn with a low rumble and a crack of its missing cylinder. You want to curl in a ball when the engine shuts off, and the door opens, Molly screaming her brother's name as she slips back through the fence.

“Just look at him—“ your mother whispers, idly smacking your shoulder as she slips through the fence to help her horse— Aster, who got his leg stuck in the feed again. 

He wasn’t actually stuck, he just liked to complain until he got help.

So, against the burning in your stomach, you look to see him. And Robert Floyd has changed, drastically. He’s still wearing the same thin wired aviation-style glasses, he doesn’t really need them for anything other than reading and flying— but he’d told you that fateful thanksgiving when he looked relatively the same in his bulky hoodie and jeans, that he liked to wear them because he’d ‘never forget them that way.’ Which wasn’t true because two days later you were shipping them to a Naval postal office in Nevada. 

His hair is much shorter now, no longer at its beautiful shoulder length. You had loved to run your hands through its slight wave, you also loved to braid it or put it up in little ponytails. His scruff was growing in a bit like he was taking an opportunity to not shave now that he was home for a few weeks, and he had a newly healed scar across his lower jaw that still left some bruising by his ear. But other than that, he was still Robert. (Your Robby, you remember calling him as a kid, when you two were actually ‘married’ with Ring Pops you bought from the gas station at the end of the road.)

But one thing stuck out to you, in the summer heat he wore a thin white tee, and you could see every bit of muscle definition he had in store. Sure, he had always had a bit of muscle, and as a more reserved person you only got to see it when you went swimming or boating with him, but now it almost strained the old shirt.

“Hey Mols, Gennie.” He calls, his voice even having changed, losing a bit of its southern drawl. Then, he turns to where he hears your Mom complaining to Aster behind you and catches your eye. He lets out a low whistle that makes a smile crack across your lips subconsciously.

“You’ve aged like a fine wine,” he calls, a bit of his drawl coming back as if it was magically reborn in his throat.

“So have you.” You reply, throat dry. As much as you want to run into his arms and hug him— then slap him for leaving for so long, you feel rooted in your place. There he is, after years of wishing he would come back, and you feel so stupid because you can’t even muster a single word out of your chapstick-covered lips. (The same lips you want to press to his, you think to yourself bitterly as you scowl.)

You look like a damn idiot, you think after a beat of silence. You find yourself praying to God he doesn’t think the same. He shuffles awkwardly, sparing glances between your eyes and your body, before humming to himself.

"What, uh-- what's..." He drawls, before just stopping himself and sighing, slamming the door shut to his truck like it's personally offended him. 

"I've been fine." You pick up on what he's trying to ask instantly, it's just like he's back in high school trying to start a conversation with someone new again, "I went to college for Equestrian studies, in Savannah, and then I came back home. I live in that little cabin on the property, like a little apartment. My mom and I fixed it up after December."

You didn't need to tell him why December was important, he wasn't there. He’d also never met your ex-boyfriend. Bob would’ve known immediately Mike was gonna be a douche. You wished he’d been there to help you, secretly,

You find it hard to keep your lips shut when he shifts, his arms flexing— and the only thing you can think of is how he’d probably be able to knock Mike out with one hit.

Bob stammers, “What-- uh. What do you do now?"

"I run a horse sanctuary and training facility about a half-hour to the coast. I help do rehab, run events, and do private barrel racing and show lessons for kids." You explain, "I also do equine therapy for kids, we're doing a thing with the Air Force next month for retired veterans. Uhm." You shuffle on your feet, "what about you?"

He leans his arms on the fence, watching as the girls run amuck in the field now, the animals paying them no mind. You remind yourself your next project is making that cow section your mom wanted to use for dairy. Bob talking pulls you out of thought, “That's nicer than what I’m stuck with. I'm a Lieutenant Weapon's System Operator, WSO, with the Navy. I don't fly the plane but I sit in the back and run radars, bombs, and such so the pilot doesn't have to. I just finished an assignment with my squadron at the Naval Air Base in Miramar, at Top Gun. I have to go back for reassignment with them.”

"I don't know what any of that means." You chuckle, moving over to you're on the fence, but a good fifteen or so feet away from him. You knew squadrons, but the knowledge of what a WSO left your brain. Bob always had the military family growing up, not you, so you’d missed out on that knowledge.

"You'll learn," he says like you'll talk to him again after this. Do you want to? You want to tell yourself that you don't, but you know deep down you want to spend every living, breathing moment with Robert Jameson Floyd like you used to. But the silence was washing over you, making everything uncomfortable, so you stand from where you lean and make your way back to the barn, calling over your shoulder as you suddenly find the guts to ride again.

"Welcome home, Floyd."

From behind you, Bob watches you leave, mentally praying he'd never have to see the way you stared at him with some sort of unfinished puppy love in your eyes again. You may have thought it was unrequited, but he knew better. Despite himself, Bob knew he was doing it too. Considering, even with the four different partners he'd taken since leaving home, he'd never gotten over you. You had always been his endgame. Whether he liked it or not, you consumed every moment of his waking thoughts. Every single thing he did, he told himself you'd be proud of. Every single day he lived, breathed, and fought through every shit-filled mission and squadron to survive to see you just once more.

And now that he was just seeing you, it didn't even feel like enough.

He wanted to hold you in his arms, he wanted to kiss you and tuck you to his side and announce you two were finally dating to family, friends, and to his squadron, but who was he kidding? You were no longer as close as you had been, there was no more dynamic duo, no more Bob and Y/n. It was not Bob, Y/n. A pause between you. He'd told himself these three weeks he had in South Carolina were gonna fix everything.

But god, you'd changed.

Either you dyed your hair or spent enough time in the sun to cause it to lighten. Your usual freckles were much deeper now, with a few randomly littered scars to match it. You'd clearly let your hair grow out, considering it fell under your shoulder blades now in two, perfectly done braids-- a new skill as well. He was able to see the distinct changes in your style, new, tighter outfits, and no more makeup to dot your clean skin.

You were stunning, just as you were in high school, but god something felt different. Maybe it had been time, but you looked... better than he remembered from that awkward thanksgiving about five years ago. Even if you'd kept in contact, it was mostly about your younger sisters, family friends, or stupid questions like the color of your cast when you fell out of the tree in his yard and broke your arm. It had been pink the first time, then green, then blue, then white and red because it was almost Christmas. Your mom still had the casts somewhere in your basement, apparently.

He's pulled from his thoughts but the sound of a whinny, turning around to see you lightly stretching atop of your horse he'd only seen maybe three or four times before he'd moved away. He knew it was Fuego, by the dark color of the horse's hair, and he watches as you whistled and clicked in the certain way that sent Fuego tearing along the dirt. She kicked up in puffs as you lead her along a designated path of the right barrel, the left barrel, then the middle one before ripping forward. Molly started cheering, climbing up the fence to get a better look with Genevieve beside her.

"Miss Y/n is so cool!" Molly cheered, waving as you turned Fuego around after her spark ran out and she'd tired. You let her slowly pace back, waving back to Molly once she was in your eyesight, your sister giggling happily as she clapped.

His mom hadn't been kidding when she said you'd gotten really good at barrel racing and other horse-related things. It took everything in him to not say that you were cool, and so so pretty too.

"Miss Y/n's got a big race Friday." Molly informs him, "She's going up against a bunch of people she wants to beat!"

"That's fun," He murmurs, mentally making a note to ask his mom if they should go. Bob, despite being reserved and shy most days, knew you had seen him in every stage of life. Nothing about you made him want to hold back, he wanted to love you, and he hoped-- somehow, you'd see he cared before he had to leave, but he wasn’t sure if that would happen. You had grown since he was gone, and probably had eyes for better guys— like Rooster. Hangman, maybe, if he’d ever get his head out of his ass.

But the squadron had heard his drunken confession of love, and they’d be on their way to his quaint little farm for the biggest fourth of July party in South Carolina— as his mom called it. He had only a few weeks to either make it so you liked him, or to hide you from the squadron.

The time restraint was gonna stress him the fuck out.

...

Your mother had decided to invite Bob and his family over for dinner since your father was still in Jersey helping his brother with his Blueberry harvest as he did every year. the dinner plans were great because you loved his sister and Step-Dad and didn't wanna have more leftovers than you could eat again, but you did not want to see Bob at all. With dirt on your jeans, you stood at the oven, cutting up some turkey for the dinner your mother had prepared.

"Mom!" Genevieve called as soon as your two dogs, a Border Collie named Lieu (for Lieutenant) and a German Shepard named Cappy (for Captain), "The Floyd's are here!"

Your mother turned, setting a dish of shrimp down on the table as an appetizer, considering you both were still cooking, "Let 'em in, hon."

"Is Robby here too?" You asked and your mother nodded, continuing to hum along to Dolly Parton. Turning yourself to the dish in front of you, you continued to cut up the meat without acknowledging the group that had walked in. You knew Bob's family like the back of your hand, the way his mom kicked off her boots at the door, but his Step-Dad, Tom, wore his boots into the kitchen before remembering to take them off every time. His only sibling, Molly, would usually yell 'Daddy! Your boots!' and he'd laugh, saying, 'Thanks, Pumpkin,' before he'd clamber back down the steps to take them off.

"Miss Y/n," Bob's mother, Jenny Floyd-Boseman, said, stepping up to wrap one arm around your shoulder, "This is a beautiful lookin' slice of meat."

"Thanks," you smile softly, "I'm using my Nana's old rub recipe so, I'm kinda hoping my nostalgia didn't make me remember this tasting better than it was."

"This isn't Mikes Nana, right?" Jenny says, stepping back with a wicked look in her eyes. You try to hide your flinch at his name with an easygoing smile.

"Lord no. Asher would kill me if he even thought I was using something from Mike's family." You laugh, Asher was your older brother by only thirteen months, he was currently down in Tennesee running an apple farm with his childhood sweetheart, but he'd be back for the 4th of July party. As would your other younger siblings, twins by the names of Avalon and Gisele.

"Mike was a dirtbag." Tom says, giving you a tight hug, "How're you doing, Mini-Sav?"

He'd always called you Mini-Sav, after your mother Savannah, because you were practically a carbon copy of her. It made you laugh, "I'm doing wonderful Mister Boseman."

"Good." He smiles and plants a kiss on your hairline, before turning to help Molly and Genevieve set plates on the table.

"Need a hand?" A voice calls and you turn to see Bob, chewing on a toothpick idly as he breaks a soft smile across his lips when you make eye contact. You pause, listening to Shania Twain across the speakers in your house. Despite wanting to say no, you feel your mother's burning gaze into your back so you nod, pushing the uncut but of steak towards him.

"Cut it into slices as I have." You explain, "It just makes it easier for the girls to cut."

He nods, and you both work in silence, you humming along to 'You're Still The One' and trying not to think about how desperately you want to kiss the man next to you. He works silently, occasionally pushing his glasses up, and before you know it everything is cut and ready to be set on the table to eat.

You end up taking the head of one side, Bob taking the other as you all idly pass around food and the table is full of dull conversation about neighborhood gossip Savannah and Jenny had heard, or what Molly and Genevieve are doing in their classes. Kenny Chesny fills your ears as you tune it all out for a while, thinking about the certain lessons you need to run tomorrow for training when Tom's tapping the table in front of your to grab your attention.

"Sorry," You flush as you swallow your steak and sit back from your slightly hunched position, "I was in teacher mode."

"That's alright, Love." He laughs, "I was askin' if you ever heard back from Mike's sister, Shannon right?"

"Yeah." You admit, rolling your wrist, the same one your ex had slammed into a gate, taking you out of racing for months, "So, apparently she's in Texas now with Mike. Apparently, their brother's roommate came home from the Navy last night and chewed him out. I think they got into a physical fight over it, Shannon sent me pictures of his nose asking if it was broken. It was crooked so..." You snort, "Jake did a number on him. Better than Dad did."

You see Bob shift, a curious look in his eyes at the mention of Jake. You didn't know if he knew Seresin, but he might've because Jake was also in the Navy.

Your mother smiles, "Jake was an angel the one time Shannon and Chris brought him up here. Do you happen to know him, Robby? Jake Seresin?"

"Yeah, he's Hangman." Bob says like that makes sense to you, "He's the one who saved Rooster and Mav's asses--" You blink at him cursing, which makes him flush, "sorry, lives."

"Those girls have heard worse." Your mother laughs, "I'm glad the Navy's brought you a bit out of your shell."

"Yeah." Bob smiles softly, stabbing his green beans. You pretend to not notice the way he's gotten a bit tense since Mike was brought up.

"I'd beat an abuser too, it's kinda sad Jake beat me to it." Tom jokes, but the way his eyes shift to your wrist and then your shoulder, you know he's not joking. Tom, who'd become your pseudo uncle in the six years you'd known him, had been more upset than your own parents (even though they were livid, Tom was on another level) when you'd finally broke the news of Mike's narcissistic and abusive patterns to them. 

"Wait--" Bob coughs with a certain look in his eyes you can't catch because he's tensing his shoulders which makes the flex-- and god he could kill you with those hands, "Who is Mike? I, sorry, if it's not any of my business it's okay."

"No, you should know." You huff, setting your fork down as you brush a hand through your hair. You don't really wanna tell Bob, but you can tell by the way his gaze is fiery that he'll probably just call Jake and ask if you don't tell him. He always was able to find out all your secrets, even if you'd never spilled a word. Bob knew you better than you knew yourself and if he was this upset you couldn't even imagine how he'd react when you told the full story. Though, that was for another day.

"About two years, I started dating a guy-- Micheal Lees. He was everything I'd wanted, smart, shy, gentle, but still tough and able to stand up for me." You cough when you realize you're describing Bob, "But he started getting just... awful around last May. He was just... ugh, I don't even know how to explain it. He was cheating on me constantly but would gaslight me into thinking it was my fault. I walked on eggshells for eight months until I realized he was stealing from me-- as soon as I knew I told Tom and Jenny."

Bob is practically seething across from you.

"I got out of it in December, which is when I refurbished the cabin in the back to live in. He stole pretty much all my money and possessions, so I got in contact with his sister Shannon and brother Chris. They helped me get back what I could, and we filed a police report and all that together." You sigh, "When I was moving into the cabin, Chris, Shannon, and Jake-- Chris's roommate, drove all my stolen stuff from Texas to here. And, that was... two months ago? Jake had to leave early though because he had a deployment in California. And that's really it."

The table falls silent for a few moments, the only sound being people's forks moving on the plates and drinks being picked up and set down before Bob takes a deep breath.

"If I ever see Mike, I'll fucking kill him." He grits out and you nearly choke at either the growl in his voice or at the genuine sincerity behind the threat. You'd always been the assertive and aggressive one growing up, but there was sweet little bookworm and volunteer Bob, who'd catch spiders and flies in cups to let them out outside, saying he'd genuinely kill someone. 

Molly spilling her water takes the moment away though. You stand to grab paper towels as you shake off the feeling of dread in your gut. As you bring the paper towels to Molly, letting her help you clean up her mess, you catch Bob's eye. He's watching you, his mother murmuring something to him (probably part of the story you hadn't told), and for once you feel tiny in his baby-eyed gaze.

...

After dinner, Jenny insists on cleaning up with Tom, so you're left to your devices. You decide since you can hear thunder in the distance, to go lock up the barn. You get the goats and cows in pretty easy using Lieu as a herding dog-- which she was bred to do. You work her, watching as she gets the cows in with a little bit of a fight until lightning begins flickering across the clouds.

"C'mon, Lieu!" You shout, whistling as she finally nips the last calf to get her in the barn. You lock the door, leaning to the side to pull it shut as you drop some feed in as a makeshift treat for the cows as thanks for getting in with as little trouble as possible. The horses go in easy enough, but you notice, as you guide Lieu back to the house along a wooded trail that some of the chickens are still out. You huff, walking to their little pen when you see Cappy run straight past you-- the Shepard snarling as he chases something away.

"Captain!" Bob shouts, huffing as he runs up beside you. You laugh softly at his exasperated expression, surprised he'd been able to keep up with the dog for so long. It was a decently long run from your house to the chicken coop.

"Captain'll take care of the chickens." You inform him, leaning over to ring the bell that informed the chickens to come back to the coop.

"She was chasing a coyote, that's what I'm worried about." He stays, shoving his hands in the back pockets of his jeans. You huff, letting out a low whistle for a long moment before clicking-- a similar call to what you'd done to Fuego earlier. You're still ringing the bell as you count the chickens. Eventually, Captain does come back, nudging a few chicks along with her nose. 

"See?" You tease Bob, trying to push past the awkward feeling in your gut, "Told ya she'd be fine."

He laughs, wiping beading sweat from his forehead as you help Captain get the rest of the chicks into the coop. As you lock the gate, you give both Captain and Lieu treats, letting them annoy Bob for ones he doesn't have. He laughs at them, giving them both kisses on the head instead, which they accept, as they start to march away. You cross your arms, feeling the air beginning to cool as a breeze whips the trees. You look up, dark clouds beginning to cover the sky above you, and that's when it starts to pour. You curse, whistling for Lieu and Captain as you grab Bob's sleeve, trying to run to the house which is a half acre away.

"It's too far!" He shouts, pulling you back. You slip on the newly accumulating mud and he manages to catch you, his glasses falling off in the process. You drop down, grabbing them as you spin.

"The barn!" You shout instead, it was much closer, but still a bit of a run, and you both look at each other before taking off for the barn after a beat. He manages to keep up with you-- better than he used to, and Captain and Lieu keep at your heels and you run. It takes the both of you to slam the door open and shut against the wind, but once everyone's inside and accounted for you huff, handing Bob back his glasses with a soft sorry as you pull your phone out to text your mom and tell her you'd both taken shelter in the barn and would probably wait out the storm since it was supposed to only be an hour or so long.

Then, you realize, the barn is full of animals except for Bob. Now you wished you'd run back to the house instead of coming here.

#top gun #top gun fanfiction #top gun maverick #top gun: maverick #robert bob floyd #robert bob floyd x y/n #robert bob floyd x you #robert bob floyd x reader #robert floyd #bob floyd #bob floyd x reader #bob floyd x y/n #bob floyd x you #all grown up twosroos

[twistedtummies2]

How would your twst ocs react to their s/o just dreamily staring at them and when called out, they tell them that they're just too handsome not to look at? Asking because I'm feeling good today lol

Well, part of this concept involves what the pair are DOING when the S/O gets caught staring at the OC. For the sake of this set of headcanons, I'm imagining the specific scenario is the OC in question and their S/O are in the school library. Maybe they're there to study, maybe they're just chatting in hushed voices, but either way, they're in an out-of-the-way spot of the area, and the OC stops whatever they are doing when they notice the S/O gazing upon them... Nakoda is very well aware of the fact he's absolutely freaking gorgeous, and prides himself in it. So somebody telling him he's handsome and eye-catching is nothing new. His reaction, of course, is to tease his little "sssweetheart," perhaps offering to let you see a lot more than his face somewhere more private. Don't take this to mean he doesn't appreciate the compliment though: he might even be blushing a little bit, since your praise means more to him than anybody else's. Billy is proud of his body, and has a certain amount of ego...but he's not used to someone just...sincerely and happily telling him he looks handsome. In fact, his first reaction when he catches you staring is worrying if he has something stuck in his teeth or whatever. Once you tell him that, no, you just like looking at him...he'll blush and give you a big, gap-toothed smile. "Awwww...well, thank you! I like looking at you, too! ^///^ " Elias will frown when he catches you, and calmly recommend you both get back to the books you're studying for class. When you tell him he's too handsome to focus on studying...his ears will perk up and his eyes will widen. His face will flush, and you can hear his tail beating against his seat as it starts to wag. After a bit, he'll calm down, a bashful smile on his face as he chuckles nervously and adjusts his glasses: "Heh heh...yes, well...be that as it may..." He tries to refocus, but after a moment, you can't help but hear him mumble: "Come on, I didn't even have a quote prepared for a response...you've gotta give me time to rehearse my reactions, jeeze..."

Reno will scowl and sneer, and actually look behind and around him, as it literally doesn't even remotely occur to him you could be admiring his face. He might even snap his fingers in your face, growling for you to focus up: you agreed to play cards with him if he agreed to study with you a bit here. He'd like to finish and get to the game ASAP. When you tell him what distracted you...his eyes will widen...then he'll snicker and shake his head: "Yeah, right. Ya don't hafta lie to me, y'know." When you make it clear you are NOT lying...well...you've got a blushy bug boi on your hands now. Do with that what you will. ;) James will be somewhat similar to Elias in response, but with one key difference: when you tell him what distracted you, his response is basically this: "...I...I am? I mean...OF COURSE! Yes, I know, I'm devilishly handsome to behold! But, ah...perhaps we can admire my splendid features later?" He'll be blushing, but he'll be filled with more pride than ever for the rest of the day. He might even brag about it to Smitty: "My darling thinks I'M the most handsome creature in the world! They can't take their eyes off me! Ha HA! Take that, Satyr, Mr. Can't-Keep-a-Mate-to-Save-His-Sorry-Life! Let's see you top THAT! >:D " Smitty...will be confused what you're staring at, and might even be a bit concerned. Once you explain to him...he immediately covers his face with his hat while making flustered sounds. Precious little dear. Maelstrom will be looking through a book of art, and glare over the rims of his reading glasses. He growls about how you don't have to stare at his glasses like that, it's not like you haven't seen him wear them before...he's not fond of when people bring attention to them. However, you tell him it's not his glasses you're looking at. Just him. All of him. And as far as the glasses go, you think he looks good in them. He'll just...stare at you, somewhat slack-jawed, startled, even stunned...before coughing into a fist and blushing as he mutters, "Wh-Whatever. Just...focus on what we're supposed to be lookin' at, got it?" You do notice, however, that after that point, he seems a lot less bothered about wearing his glasses in class. Theodore and Grit, I'm not sure yet, but I can guarantee they're another couple of boys who get blushy to some degree or another. Running theme with the whole team. ;)

#ask #answer #q&a #disney #twisted wonderland #oc ask #headcanon #romance #silliness #cuteness #ocs #maelstrom #maelstrom baleno #smitty #smitty mccarthy #james #james killian #reno #reno rovar #eli #elias #elias inque #billy #billy geant #nako #nakoda #nakoda spivak

[meowthon]

Hi there! Hope your day/night is going well! If asks are still open, i'd love to submit one!

I dunno if you do hc's/scenarios for specific characters, but if you do i would love to see some mammon x gn! reader hc's where reader doesn't really like him when they first arrive in Devildom, usually chiming in when someone makes fun of him and avoiding him whenever possible, but as time goes on and as they spend more and more time with him and start to see the softer, more protective sides of him, they start to warm up and eventually grow super close to him to the point they would even argue with the brothers on his behalf. Would love to see a love confession somewhere in there as well if possiblee! 🙏 Thank you :D

i’m so sorry that this took me so long! I was working really hard on it and I hope you like it!

to say you hated Mammon was an understatement. whenever he was around it made the hair on the back of your neck stand up. you never know what he could be plotting, trying to steal or what mess he’d make that you would inevitably have to clean up for him. you found him so detestable that if you were to describe him to someone you’d use the words insufferable, annoying, menacing. any word that showed how much of a scum he was, how he was nothing more then a piece of gum stuck to the bottom of your shoe.

Mammon may be a bit dumb, but he’s more aware then you would imagine. he knows how you feel. it’s obvious how you avoid him at all costs, ignoring him when he talks. still he tries his best to make sure you’re not getting into any trouble. you’ve told him hundred of times that it’s not necessary. you say that you don’t need his protection, you’ll be fine with it and he brushes it all off. it goes in one ear and out the other. Mammon will get no rest until he sees for himself that you’re safe.

everywhere you went he had to follow. personal space was a term Mammon is not familiar with apparently seeing as he is always attached to your hip. anytime you’d bring it up by telling him to leave you alone he’d say the same thing. “It’s my duty to protect ya human!” anyone with a brain would know that this is nothing more then an excuse to keep bugging you.

dealing with Mammons overbearing-ness can be a lot. its enough to send anyone over the edge. many would say it’s understandable. they all feel the same way.

when you chime in to help make fun of Mammon it’s an understatement to say it destroys him. no pain but this has ever made him feel as though his heart is bleeding from his chest. thousands of years of living and no one can hurt him quite like you do. no one else’s opinion matters like yours does.

if it’s a particularly rough day on him, it makes him silently spiral as he lays in bed with his head under the pillows. he will stay there for hours crying and thinking about ways to gain your approval. nothing will stop him from getting it.

he decided that he’d have to work as hard as possible to show you what kind of demon he really is. it may take months or even years but to him it didn’t matter because he’s not giving up.

with Mammon being more determined to prove to you he means business, you’re more determined to avoid him at all costs. eventually it’s become so much that you felt the need to hide from him in Lucifers office, the one place Mammon wouldn’t dare go and would rather avoid it like the plague.

“seriously!” you whine to Lucifer. “it’s like he’s following me even more now. at this point it feels like he’s doing it to purposely annoy me.” he exhales a deep sigh, torn on how to reply. on one hand he knows first hand how Mammon can push the limits of someone, but on the other somewhere deep inside his soul and no matter how much he’d hate to admit it he knows that Mammon does have a kind heart and deeply cares for you. this is one thing he can relate to with him. “I understand your predicament y/n. Mammon is VERY annoying.” he paused to sigh again. he took a few seconds to try and decide how to word what he wants to say. he in no way wanted to praise Mammon. just the thought makes him want to vomit but he also didn’t want to make you feel worse. “however, I did assign him to look after you. for now you’ll just have to deal with him. I apologize.” was the best he could come up with.

when you wake the next morning you have murder on your mind. who other then mammon would be banging on the door and yelling your name like a maniac. it took everything not to scream at him to shut up at the top of your lungs. thinking back on what Lucifer said you decide not to. his advice wasnt the best but Mammon is just doing what was asked of him. once you grunt a few times you finally get out of bed and head to the door. upon opening it you’re greeted with a bright eyed Mammon. “what’re ya doin getting out of bed this late? we’ll never hear the end of it if we don’t make it on time.” god he’s so annoying. did you really have to deal with this? the sound of his voice could make eardrums burst. ‘patience y/n. patience.’ you say to yourself. you take a deep breath before speaking. “let me get ready. it will only take a few minutes. i’ll be right back.” and you shut the door in his face. maybe you could have been nicer but you’re trying. the sudden slamming of the door makes Mammon jump back a bit. “oi! whatdya do that for human? i’ll have you know i’m one of the elite demon rulers okay! you got some nerve slamming the door on the great Mammon! you outta be more grateful.” hearing him call himself that always makes you laugh. “relax Mammon I have to get dressed and I cant do that with you standing there.” you say whike rushing back and forth to get your clothes and brush your hair. when you’re finally ready and open the door you try not to notice the red in his face. “so listen y/n.”

‘oh god’ you think. ‘what could he be plotting so early in the morning. he doesn’t give it a rest does he?’ he continues. “I got you something.” a gift? this was the first time you were excited to talk to Mammon. “dont think anything of it okay? I just happened to have a little left over from the casino last night and on my way home I spotted somethin I thought you might like but it ain’t no big deal okay?” he yelled so loudly it scared the crap out of you. “Mammon do you have to yell right now?” you ask. “whatever! just take it.” he didn’t say it that much quieter but you decided to ignore it since he did get you something. in his hands laid a small black box that he shoved towards you. he couldn’t even meet your eyes because he was so nervous about you liking the gift. inside was a beautiful bracelet with a golden charm. the charm has your initial engraved on it. “Mammon this is a gorgeous bracelet. I don’t know what to say. thank you. really thank you.” it warmed your heart that he went out of his way to get you such an elegant gift even though he says he only “happened to see it.”

the weekends weren’t much different. you’re woken up by his knocks at the door and then greeted by a cheesy grin. when he smiled you could tell why he’s a model, it’s a pretty smile that makes the rest of his face even more handsome but regardless you still wanted to choke him out for waking you up. on weekends he always had a plan for you guys. usually it was shopping or catching a movie but on special days he’d take you to places no one knows about, places he’d only share with you.

there was a beautiful waterfall deep in a nearby forrest that he would go to on days where he wanted to get away. he hadn’t told anyone about this spot. it was his special secret and he didn’t want anyone intruding on it, that is until you came along. the thought of taking you there consumed his mind nearly everyday and he was excited to finally be taking you there. he planned a surprise picnic for the two of you. it took a few weeks to save up for an array of food. he spent half of that time with Barbatos learning how to cook so he knew the food would be good. when the day of came he went into town to find a bouquet of flowers that reminded him of you. he texted you saying to meet him by the gardens for a date. at first you thought about declining, but a date means free food. he didn’t tell you where you were going or what you’re doing for that matter. he grabbed your hand and guided you to the spot. it was a beautiful sight. there was a blanket laid across the grass with all kinds of delicious looking snacks and desserts. the waterfall was gorgeous and the sounds of it falling added with the sun setting made it the perfect romantic ambiance. this part was very purposeful. Mammon wanted to have the picnic at sunset partly because he knew how pretty it would look but also because once it sets the stars come out and he can lay with you as you watch them together. his favorite person, good food and a beautiful night sky and no brothers around to ruin it makes for the perfect date. he was incredibly happy at this moment. “you better eat up! I didn’t spend all that time cooking up food for nothing.”

after spending a few hours in the dark Mammon noticed your yawns and tired eyes. he must have filled you up with such good food that you’re starting to doze off is what he tells himself. “if ya want… you can rest your head on me.” he tells you. you thought about it for a second before doing scooting up to him. “thank you Mammon for giving me a great night.. im sorry that I haven’t always been nice to you. you didn’t deserve that.” it shocked him to hear you say that. “where did that come from?….stupid human.” he replies. it didn’t matter if you weren’t always kind in the past what matters is that you gave him a chance to prove himself. you’re here now and that’s what means the most.

the next time he’s made fun of it strikes a cord with you. for the first time instead of agreeing or laughing with them it made you enraged to hear someone talk so lowly of Mammon. it made you jump out of your seat quickly and scare everyone in the dining hall. due to the loud sound all eyes fell on you. it was terrifying to say the least but after everything you felt you had to stand up for him. he would do the same for you, he always has. “Mammon isn’t like that guys.” you could hear most of them laugh or scoff but decided to ignore it and continue. “I know i’ve had my fair share in making fun of Mammon but i’ve realized that he really isn’t a bad person. he’s done so much for me. he’s actually really kind and caring.” they didn’t take it very well. they seemed upset and it made you unsure of what to do. it’s rare anyone would be mad at you. “Mammon isn’t perfect, but neither are any of you.”

everyone blamed Mammon saying he must of put a spell on you to make you think like this. “I didn’t do anything! maybe someone’s just finally starting to realize just how cool the great Mammon really is! or y/n is just like.. totally in love with me.” he jokes. no one found it funny. instead you can tell it made them more angry and you knew you have to stop this before it get too lively. you walked over to Mammon and grabbed his arm. “Mammon! stop it! let’s just go.”

now alone with him in his room, he feels like he can be himself again. being alone with you gives him an ease he’s never experienced before. “sit with me Mammon.” you pat the seat next to you on the couch. “those guys are so stupid! what kinda brothers are they? if I can even call them that!” he says sitting down. you turn towards him to get a good look at his face. he’s a kind of beautiful you don’t see often. sitting this close makes you realize why he’s a model. he really does have gorgeous features. you reached for his hands. “can I hold them?” you ask. he doesn’t say anything as he takes your hands in his. he did it with a sense of urgency like if he didn’t do it right then you’d pull your hands away. “Mammon i’m so sorry this happened. I know they may not see how great you are but I do. I meant what I said. I really do think you’re amazing and I enjoy spending time with you.” his smile is contagious. “well if you think that then that’s all that matters.” he says. you’re so close to him. it was making your heart race. what’s going on with you today? since when did he make you feel like this? you feel yourself inching a bit closer. you know he’s been talking but you haven’t registered a single word. you’re too distracted thinking about his lips. they’re just so pretty.. everything about him is pretty. how have you not noticed this before? “Mammon…” you interrupt. you should feel bad but don’t. the only thing on your mind is getting closer to him. “wha- why are ya looking at me like that? are you even listening to me y/n?” he’s noticed you staring at his lips and his body went limp minutes ago. you make him so weak, so passionate. “and when did you get so close to me?” he questions like he minds it. he can’t lie at all. he wants you right there. “Mammon I want to kiss you.” you’re hoping and BEGGING in your mind that he lets you. you just need the okay and he gives it to you. he’d give you anything you asked. he doesn’t care what it would cost him. if you asked it was yours. “well what are ya goin on askin for just do it!” you immediately push your lips onto his and his body goes from limp to tingling all over. his lips are soft and supple. his kiss is gentle. he could lose his composure any second, but he’s waited ages for this and he can’t ruin it. you have to be in control. he has so much adrenaline pumping through his veins he wants to tell you how he feels. he’s terrified but he needs you to know. he needs to know if this can be something so he says “y/n. I need to tell ya something.” you’re annoyed that the kiss is over you had full intentions of kissing until you were purple in the face. you shake your head to tell him to keep going. you need to catch your breath. “when we’re together it makes me really like so happy it’s like nothing else matters.” your face is painted with a smile. he may not be the most literate but he’s a sweetheart. “I feel the same way Mammon.” he takes a deep breath and continues his confession. “look okay i’m trying to say that no one’s gonna treat ya like I will! I love you y/n. I love ya so much it’s crazy.” you slam your lips onto his again and give him little pecks over and over and over. he lets out a little yelp. it shocked him for sure but he’s not complaining. “I love you too Mammon.” hearing you say that lifted all the weight off his shoulders. he couldn’t be happier.

#obey me headcanons #obey me imagines #mammon obey me #obey me x reader #mammon x reader #shall we date obey me #mammon imagine #mammon headcanon

[theacedragon0w0]

Lizard out of Water

SagexHazel Fishing Trip Fic

Giving the Butch4butch couple some love

Hazel belongs to the pookie ever @puffymucher

Hazel chuckled as she saw Sage carrying the large cooler and camo bag up the hill, "Yer sure ya don't need a hand there Bluebell?"

"I said I got it love!" Sage shouted excitedly, bouncing behind the hellhound as they made their way up to the fishing spot.

"Thanks again for letting me tag along with you Hazelnut."

Hazel stopped so she could ruffle the reptile's hair, "Shoot, if anything I am glad ya wanted to come with me, the boss and the others aren't so keen at getting their hands dirty like us."

Sage playfully punched Hazel's arm, "Which is why we are the hired guards."

"Can't argue with that. We are almost at the spot, this ain't like the gluttony ring but it's pretty damn close in terms of it being far from the city."

Sage sighed, "Anything to take a break from having to smell constant cigarette smoke and cheap booze."

After a few more twists and turns, the two made it to an open lake, isolated by the twisted oak forest that protected it from the influence from the nine circles.

Sage couldn't contain their excitement, "Is this the same lake that Lucifer himself created as a wedding gift for Lilith?"

Hazel scratched her neck, "I think so, I didn't look too much into it, I only figured it was a nice quiet place away from it all."

Sage was already trucking over towards the dock that stood over the mass body of water, dropping their stuff and already pulling out the fishing gear by the time Hazel caught up with them. Whistling at Sage's muscly-soft body.

"I didn't think you'd be this excited over fishing dear,"

Sage's ears drooped, "Oh, sorry," but Hazel squeezed their shoulder.

"Don't apologize for it Bluebell! It's very sweet that you're putting all this effort for me." Hazel giving Sage a kiss on their nose bridge, getting happy gurgles from the demon. Hazel's paw was still resting on Sage's cheek, staring at the scar that was still a deep crimson.

"Hazel? Everything ok?"

Hazel snapped from the dark thought, "Oh I'm good Bluebell! Now let me show you how to cast your line."

--

Sage was humming a soft tune as their line lazily danced to the wind. Hazel was watching her girlfriend as she went to pull two canned sodas from the cooler, watching Sage's tail wag back and forth to their rhythm.

Sage stopped when Hazel bumped their arm with the cold drink, thanking her for the refreshment. Hazel continued to stare at Sage's tail, her gaze centered at the large scar that rested under the base of the tail. Hazel wrapped her arms around Sage, pulling them in a tight embrace.

"Ok Hazelnut, what's bugging you? I can feel your growl radiating through your fur."

"I love you Sage," Hazel muttered, "You are like if a bunch of rainbows and sparklers were duct-taped together and was covered with heart stickers."

Sage wiggled under the hug so that they could reciprocate it, "So what's the problem love?"

"I just wished I would've killed that cunt sooner, I hate having these thoughts of someone laying their hands on you, especially when you did nothing but try to love 'em and they hurted you anyway."

"Listen," Sage pushed Hazel just so they can have some space, they carefully unbuttoned the bottom buttons of Hazel's shirt, making the hellhound blush deeply.

But Sage stopped as they rubbed their hand over Hazel's stomach, "You know when you told me how you got those scars, I was hellbent on finding your ex so I can turn her into a chalk outline."

"But I said no, cuz I know you would've done it."

"Because I love you too Hazel, and the others as well. I'm going to be stuck with these but you know what? If I was asked if I could redo everything I wouldn't change anything, because you guys make it worth it."

"Oh Sage!" Hazel pulled Sage towards her, their noses awkwardly mushing together but they readjusted, exchanging soft moans as the two ran their hands over each other.

The moment halted when Sage heard the pole unwind quickly, "Hazel I think I caught something!!" Quickly scampering over to the fishing pole.

"You got this Bluebell!" Hazel cheered as Sage was strategically reeling in the line.

They almost got the fish out of the water when the line snapped, the force of it threw the reptile out of balance as they fell into the lake.

"Sage!" Hazel shouted, diving in just as Sage was returning to the surface.

Hazel looked at her lover, whose wet hair covered their face and was laughing.

Hazel moved the hair out of Sage's face, cupping the their face as the two were floating on the water.

"Sorry about losing the catch sweetie," Sage sheepishly confessed.

"I'd say it's worth it as long as I get to hear ya laugh like that!" Hazel replied, pulling Sage into another kiss.

#hazbin hotel oc #oc x canon #oc x oc

[anneimaginesundertale]

Helllooooo I am so sorry but I'm obsessed with WW stretch now🥲🥲 and not many people write him so your probably gonna get millions of WW asks off me I sincerely apologize

Ok so what if WW stretch left town for the longest he'd ever been, and when he comes back to town he stays one or two days extra to make it up to his S/O but on the like second last day he proposes to his S/O! 💍👀

That's all from me for now😅😅

No need to be sorry! I don’t mind getting more Wild West asks. It’s a fun AU that I haven’t done too much with. Ask away!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You jumped out of your seat as soon as you heard the sound of hooves outside. Technically it might not have been Stretch—it hadn’t been him for almost a year now—but it also might be him and you weren’t about to miss him! You raced out the doors.

It was him! He was just tying up his horse. You flew to him, leaping off the porch and into his arms. “Stretch! You’re back!”

“Hey, honey,” he said, catching you and spinning you around. “I missed ya so much!”

“Not as much as I missed you, you old cowpoke. Why were you gone so long?”

“Had to go lookin’ for something,” he said with a cheeky grin. “Took me that long to find it.”

“What was it?” you asked.

“I’ll show ya in a couple days.”

“Aww…I want to see it now!”

“Be patient. I’m not gonna ride off before I show ya. Ya just gotta trust me.”

“Fine…But I’m not lettin’ you out of my sight, mister!”

“Fine by me.” He snickered and then kissed you. “I missed doin’ that.”

The next few days, you stuck to what you’d said. You spent as much time with your handsome skeleton as possible. You showed him all the changes that had happened in town, spent time with his brother, and (of course) kissed and hugged him as often as you could. You had months of affection to make up for, after all. You also bugged him about what it was he’d been looking for, but he always said, “Not yet. Trust me.”

On his fifth night back in town, Stretch said, “There’s gonna be a meteor shower tonight, honey. Ya wanna ride out with me a little ways and find a good spot to watch it?”

“I’d love to,” you said.

“Great. I’ll give ya that surprise then too.”

You were practically vibrating with excitement. As the sun began to sink in the sky, Stretch picked you up and rode out of town. The two of you found a good stargazing spot and lay down on a blanket. You cuddled close to him as the sky darkened.

Stretch kissed you, softly and sweetly. “I love ya so much, honey,” he said. “More’n I ever thought I could love anybody.”

“I love you too, Stretch,” you said. “I feel like you take my soul with you whenever you leave.” You snuggled closer to him, pressing your ear to his chest. You could hear his soul singing softly.

“I leave my soul here with you,” he said. “Seems like a fair trade to me.”

“It’s not…”

He sat up suddenly. “Look!” He pointed to a streak of light across the sky. The meteor shower was starting! You sat up too and watched in wonder as the stars seemed to fall toward earth.

“It’s beautiful,” you breathed.

“Almost as beautiful as you,” he said. When you looked at him, he was holding a ring. The light of the shooting stars glinted off it. You gasped.

Stretch took your hand and gently slipped the ring onto your finger. “Marry me,” he said. “Marry me and come with me when I go. Please.”

“You only ever had to ask,” you said, and you hugged him so hard he fell back onto the blanket again. The two of you didn’t see the rest of the meteor shower.

#wild west au #ww us papyrus #ww us papyrus x reader #drabble

[flkwh0re]

Transcript

(The DreamWorks Pictures logo plays out, with dreamy music playing underneath. At the end of the logo, the S's in "DreamWorks" and "SKG" turn green and grow out ogre ears, matching the film's logo. Credits saying "DreamWorks Pictures Presents" and "A PDI/DreamWorks Production" appear.)

(A ray of light shines down on a leather-bound storybook. The book opens and a Scottish-accented voice begins reading its text)

Shrek: Once upon a time there was a lovely princess. But she had an enchantment upon her of a fearful sort which could only be broken by love's first kiss. She was locked away in a castle guarded by a terrible fire-breathing dragon. Many brave knights had attempted to free her from this dreadful prison, but none prevailed. She waited in the dragon's keep in the highest room of the tallest tower. For her true love and true love's first kiss.

(Shrek chuckles and rips out a page of the book and closes it)

Shrek: Like that's ever gonna happen. What a load of - (toilet flushes)

("All Star" by Smash Mouth Playing)

(We see an outhouse and hear the sound of a toilet flushing. Out steps Shrek, an ogre, who tugs at his underwear and shakes his foot of the page still stuck to his shoe. He looks lovingly at the swamp he calls home, and goes about his daily routine. Which is taking a mud shower, brushing his teeth with bugs, bathing in a muddy pond, gathering giant slugs for dinner, and painting a warning sign)

(In a nearby village, an angry mob gather up to go after Shrek. At night they gather their torches and pitchforks and enter the swamp, trampling over Shrek's warning signs. Shrek sees them after investigating the commotion, rolling his eyes. The villagers stop outside Shrek's home, unaware that Shrek is sneaking up behind them)

NIGHT - NEAR SHREK'S SWAMP

Villager 1: Think it's in there?

Villager 2: All right. Let's get it!

Villager 1: Whoa. Hold on. Do you know what that thing can do to you?

Villager 3: Yeah, it'll grind your bones for its bread.

(Shrek chuckles, revealing himself to be standing behind the mob)

Shrek: Yes, well, actually, that would be a giant.

(The mob gasps)

Shrek: Now, ogres, oh they're much worse. They'll make a suit from your freshly peeled skin...

(Shrek slowly approaches as the villagers back away in fear)

Villager: No!

Shrek: They'll shave your liver. Squeeze the jelly from your eyes! Actually, it's quite good on toast.

Villager 1: Back! Back, beast! Back! I warn ya!

(The villager waves his torch in Shrek's face. Shrek casually licks his fingers and pinches the flame, extinguishing the torch. The villager drops it)

Villager 1: Right.

(Shrek terrifies the mob with a great frightening roar, his spit extinguishing all the remaining torches. He wipes his mouth and waits for the villagers to stop screaming)

Shrek: (whispering) This is the part where you run away.

Villagers: (gasping)

(Shrek laughs as the men drop their torches and pitchforks and run away as fast they can)

Shrek: And stay out!

(He looks down and picks up a wanted poster dropped by one of the villagers. He reads it aloud)

SHREK: "Wanted. Fairytale creatures"?

(He sighs and walks off. dropping the poster to the ground)

WHAT. IN. GODS. GOOD. GLORY..

#insane anon

[ducknotinarow]

03/7 Rasey - [☕] our muses make hot chocolate together

| SEND AN EMOJI FOR A STARTER ! ↳ winter season & holiday based

Raphael stood arms crossed over his plastron, eyes were downwards looking to the city below. High enough that he would simply blend in with the dark of the night alone. Not lighting to give him away or he wouldn't risk standing so openly like he was. Ears trained to the city noise from the streets below. The low sound of car's driving through the city. The buzzing of light bulbs close to burning out likely to be left unfixed. As Raph could see a store sign with burned out lights no longer reading out how it should. If he was in a better mood he might get a slightly chuckle out of it reading as 'Ho Dpot' Slightly glowering now as he dropped his arms to his sides and huffed out in annoyance. Starting to pace from the edge of the building he was stalking on top of. Raphael wasn't exactly the most patience of mutants or well anything really. But he had been standing alone for some time just beyond annoyed at this point. Jump down on to the roof as he moved to peer over the side of the building where the fire escape was.

Annoyed by the lack of a presence, he huffs again turning around to pace across the roof top. His annoyance only building more and more as he holds his arms again, the chill of the night air had already long ago settled into his bones hours ago. To an extent Raphael was used to the cold so it wasn't bugging him that much but still was working on his nerves. The minutes ticking by the cold getting worse and he was still standing here just waiting around. Raphael was far past his limit of patience by this point. Grumbling under his breath when he finally thought about going for his phone, he hears the squeak of metal and snaps around so quick it had the tail ends of his mask fly up into the air.

"Finally!" is the greeting he throws at Casey once he finally arrived at their meeting spot. Not even hiding his annoyance, then again when did he ever hide that? "Ya fuckin' late! You live 'ike five minutes from here. I gotta travel nearly five blocks under the city to get here and i still beat you?!" But Casey being Casey never really seemed to buy into the the snaps and such from the turtle. Instead, Raphael found himself offered a to go cup. Raphael lowered his eyes to the drink he could smell the rich scent of chocolate from where even he stood. His attention flickered between the cup and Casey himself for a few beats before he snatched it clearly, signling he accepted it as a sorry.

Shell turned to face them as he stormed off to where he was resting before. Before he plopped himself down, feet hanging over the edge of the building as he waited for Casey to join him. Still all to aware of the crowd down in the dark city block. Everyone was waiting for the same thing some big Christmas lighting event. Part of why Casey wasn't there sooner stuck in a line to grab some hot chocolate so they could sip it and watch the display from where they were. It was a bit of Raphael's idea in truth. When he had heard about it, he mentioned never seeing anything like that but there was some curiosity and intresr and seemed the only push Casey needed to agree to seeing and watching it.

Of course, their vantage point offered them a far better view than down on the street would. There was some buzz through a speaker, a voice but Raoh couldn't fully hear what was being said from how far up they were sitting. It likely didn't matter all thar much. Some cheers and claps came from the crowd below. And Raphael took a sip from his cup. Savoring the taste of chocolate as it rushed over his tongue.

When he sees the first set of lights break through the thick curtin that the night offered. He lowers his cup and eyes slightly become so focused on it. Slowly the row of white light all came to life as if a shoot star was flying across the crowd. Raphael wondered how the lights did that head turning to watch as it seemed to travel up and around the tree till reaching the top. The start shone bright and if Raphael wasn't wearing his mask? His green eyes would be wide and in pure awe. As the muti color lights took turns lighting up as if they were flakes of glitter or confetti falling down and raining over the crowd of humans. It was enough to keep the turtle silent a moment just eyes so glued to the sight the music playing to add to the options of the lights just seemed to pull him in.

"Wonder how it 'ike down there." He slightly says. Not sure if Casey even watching how engrossed he was becoming. Into the little show below. Not that Raph even was aware himself. Watching how the lights spred out from the tree and started to fill the stree below with twinkling little lights. It's not something he's got to see before and well it's great from where he is now? He wished he could be down there to watch it all play out. It's was just well pretty not that he would say that out loud.

But then Casey makes mention about next year that Raoh bearly catches. Yet, that was all Casey had to say a promise of next year, Casey wanted to do this next year? Enough to tear the turtles attetion finally away from the lights and over to Casey. Raphael only regretted that action when he found it hard to look away from Casey in that moment. Thier fave lit up with tje colors of the lights from below, hiw those ocean blues seemed to reflect the colors in them. Raphael felt like he was starting up at the sun from under the water.

"Yeah?" He simply asks but it holds so much more behind the one question. Many laced and hidden under it. You want todo this again? You want to come with me again? You'll take me here again? You and me will be here again? Though in truth? They were all the same question. Will still be together next year? The unspoken question that somehow found its way on to the turtles face as he looked over Casey's own as if he asked it out loud and Casey wore the answer on thier own.

It was maybe stupid but Raphael? Well he still. Ouldnt understand what it was that made Casey pick him? Honestly he would think April was the mkre obvious and better choice. He'll any human would be. Yet out of anyone litterally it was him? Him thar Casey picked. So Casey was going to constantly pick him? Raphael lowered his gaze too look back to the lightly show.

"Gonna make me wait around again next year?" He slightly teases as a yes to the remark. I'll go again was what he meant. Before moving to let his head rest against Casey's shoulder. He hopes this just one of those things they always do. "Ya jus' lucky that I got a sweet tooth." Raph says playfully, buntting his head against the back of Casey's shoulder, his special little gesture he reserved for Casey. Cause he jad a soft spot for his boyfriend too, thst he wouldn't admit or own up to.

"Next year though, 'hink I won't blow off Leo and take a jacket." Scooting a little ways over pressing in nice and snug against Casey's side, allowing a shiver to roll over his spine as he slightly hides his face against Casey's arm. "It's fuckin' cold." He complains, using Casey to help warm up.

#muse| hamato raphael #madamkezzie #aflockoffeathers #[ if you jumped off a bridge its only cause i did first -aflockofeathers] #[03 verse] #meme answers #winter season & hoilday meme #ic reply #stay queued #((slightly went against the prompt but I don't trust these two to even mircowave it u-u)) #((raphs the girlfriend that gets mad if caseys a second late uwu))

[theunquenchablethirst]

Joyride (Jerome X Reader)

Smut, NSFW, 18+, porn without plot, honestly just hot, nasty filth 

Do not read unless you are a deviant!

Reader is walking home down a street she knows just like the back of her hand, but today there's an unfamiliar car parked up. Paying it no mind she continues past it, but soon discovers today is not going to be any regular day when a sinister voice calls to her from the mysterious car behind her.

Vaginal fingering, blowjobs, rough sex, semi-public sex, car sex, bondage, chocking, spanking, dom/sub undertones, dub-con, strong language, murder, kidnap

YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED

Masterlist

I walked that street nearly every day, to and from Gotham High. I had for years. This would be my last year as I was 18 and about to graduate.

Everything seemed as normal as ever. The pretzel cart, the lady that walked her little dog, the kids playing jump rope. A fairly quiet street. I didn't know it then, but that day would be anything, but normal.

I was approaching the end of the street where I would cross the road. There was a car parked up I hadn't seen before. Big, black with tinted windows. I didn't pay it much attention and wasn't hesitant to carry on my walk past it. I reached the end of the street and stood waiting for the traffic to quiet so I could cross over, then behind me I heard the familiar sound of a car window winding down.

"Hey, princess." A sinister voice called.

I turned to look and peering out of the black car window was him. The most dangerous, most wanted man in Gotham city. Jerome Valeska.

I'd only seen him on the news and in papers before, but even then, he had scared me. He'd brought the city to its knees and left a trail of bodies and madness wherever he went. And now he was right in front of me.  

"Can I give you a ride?" He asked with his signature smile plastered on his scarred face, voice dripping with menace.

I froze still. I wanted to run as fast as I could, but his stare glued me to my spot.

"Come on, doll. I'll be nice."

I took a step back, weighing the risk of making a run for it. He sucked his teeth and looked down for something.

"I'd offer you candy, but uh..." He pulled a gun up to the window and pointed it at me.

"... Something tells me I won't need to." His smile somehow grew bigger as he locked his eyes on mine.

My heart was beating so loud I thought the whole city would be able to hear it. I had no choice. Knees weak, I nervously walked around to the passenger side door and opened it. I sat in the seat next to him, but pressed myself as close to the window as I could. I wanted to be as far away from him as possible, even if it was only by a few inches.  

"Ah, safety first. Seatbelt." He said dropping his smile and cocking his head.

Not caring weather or not he was joking, I pulled down the belt and buckled myself in. I did not want to make him angry. He grinned eerily and panic rose in my chest as his eyes burned holes in me.  

He reached a gloved hand out to my face. I flinched as he brushed a stray lock of hair behind my ear and stroked his knuckles down my jaw line and neck. His hand moved lower still down my arm, only stopping when he got to my shaking hand. I was grasping my bag so tightly my knuckles had turned white. He tugged at it a few times wanting me to let go. I released the bag and he pulled it off my lap and into his.

"Let's see what we got here."

He started to rummage through my possessions pulling each one out, mostly dubbing them boring and dumping them out of the window.

"Pain killers, boring. Pencil case, extra boring. Ooh, Jolly Ranchers! Don't mind if I do!"

He popped a sweet in his mouth, threw the rest over his shoulder into the back seat and got back to snooping.

"Keys, boring. Oh! A diary! I'll save that for later! A can of mace...."

He paused then let out a loud cackle as he held the mace.

"Oh, princess! Bet you wish you'd switched this out for a gun right about now!" He continued to giggle as he dived a hand back in.

"Aha! Phone!" He dropped my bag back in my lap and opened up my flip phone.

"You won't be needing this." He smirked and snapped it, letting the two halves fall and disappear under the driver's seat. Dread began to settle in as it dawned upon me that I now had no way to call for help and my mace was lying in the street. Not that it would've been much use against him anyway.

"Ok! Let's get this party started!" His giggled as he turned the key in the ignition. He turned towards me and revved the engine.

"Vroom, vroom." He mocked.

I sat there clutching my bag, waiting for the car to start moving. He fiddled with the gear stick and then slammed his foot down on the pedal as if there was a deadly bug that needed to be squashed. The tyres screeched like they were taking a layer of tarmac with them and he took off like a boy racer.  

I let out a scream as the sudden, fast pace sent a shockwave right through me. I sent my hands searching for something, anything to hold on to. There was a turn coming up, but I noticed it too late and I was flung into the side of the door like a ragdoll. All the time the loudest noise in my ear was maniacal laughter coming from Jerome in driver's seat. He was driving like he stole it, but then again, it was entirely possible he did.

"More?" He looked at me with a mischievously.

I shook my head, breathlessly, praying to any god that was listening that he actually cared about my answer.

"I think more." He sharply turned into an empty car park and spun around and around and around. I was pressed right up against him as I clung to the bottom of my seat. He laughed and banged his hand on the wheel, continuing to spin us around.

"You stupid son of a bitch!" I screamed forgetting myself.  

"Oh, I love 'em with fire!" He laughed again.  

Then all of a sudden, he stopped. I jolted forwards like a crash dummy so hard I thought I would hit the windshield. He'd been right about the seatbelt. I stared straight ahead and tried to catch my breath, when I heard angry shouting. An employee of the restaurant that owned the car park was making his way over to us with a red face.

Jerome stuck his head out of the window.

"What's that, pal?"  

I heard more shouting.

"Ok." Jerome reached for the gun and shot the employee straight in the head. I gasped at the sound and he fell down like a sack of bricks.

"Problem solved." Jerome grinned and pocketed the gun.

I felt my stomach turn. I'd just seen a murder right in front of me. That poor man. Jerome started the car again and left the car park, where he'd left a dead body and certainly tyre tracks.

"Some fun, eh kid?" He smiled at me. I couldn't find any words to reply. He sighed.

"I hate awkward silences." He reached down and turned on the radio. He flicked through a few channels until he found one playing music he seemed to like. An old rock station.

"Now this is better!" He looked at me with a satisfied smile, but dropped it when I still didn't reply.

"How do I get you to talk? Do I gotta drop a quarter in ya?" He turned another corner onto a straight, quiet road.

"I know." He smirked with a menacing look in his eyes.  

He pushed the pedal down, once again picking up speed. He was driving like there was money on it, but I'd at least managed to brace myself this time. He slowed a little as he got in place to drive side by side with the only other car on the road. He chuckled darkly to himself and then I realized why. Fear took my senses when I saw in the not too far distance, heading straight at us was a giant truck. The driver in the car next to us began to honk the horn and flash obscene hand gestures as the truck grew closer, but Jerome simply turned the radio up and began singing along with the words.

"Jerome..." I said tugging at his arm.

Nothing. And the truck was now honking at us to move.  

"Jerome!"  

The truck was too close for comfort. The sense that I was about to be flattened because of the idiot at the wheel filled my body.

"Jerome, move the damn car!" I shook his arm fiercely and slammed my fists in my chair.

He finally burst out cackling maniacally with an outrageous smile.

He slammed down the pedal and pulled forward in front of the car beside us, missing the truck by a hair. He laughed and howled like it was the funniest thing he'd ever experienced, whilst I sighed the biggest sigh of my life and slid low down my seat. He pulled over and parked.

"Nothing like a little near-death experience to get the blood flowing, eh doll?"  

I had melted into my seat and wasn't really paying attention.

"So, how'd you like me so far?"

"Is that a serious question?" I replied breathlessly. I didn't know where I got the confidence for it, but the words were coming out.

He just giggled.

"Ok, how about I behave... For a while."

"How about you let me go?"

He lifted a long finger at me.

"Tut tut, doll face. Don't make me wiggle my finger at you."

I shuffled backwards in my seat, propping myself upright again.

"So, you know my name? Are you stalking me?" He put his hand on his chest in mock fear.

"Everyone in Gotham knows your name. You're Jerome Valeska. You've terrorised the city and murdered dozens of people. The Gotham Gazette makes sure we don't miss these things."  

"The Gotham Gazette, huh? Note to self, send a gift basket their way." He chuckled to himself then looked at me.

“So, what’s yours?”

I told him my name. I was reluctant, but I was already here in the car with him.

“Hm, cute.” He replied.

I didn’t know why, but him calling me cute made me blush a little. I hoped he didn’t notice.

“You look fun.” He smiled.

“What do you mean?” I asked the question, but I wasn’t sure I really wanted to know the answer.

He pulled my diary out of the door pocket.

“Let’s get to know you, shall we?”  

“That’s private.” I said sheepishly. I really didn’t want him reading what was in there, but I knew I couldn’t stop him.

“Not anymore.” Jerome flicked through the pages, skimming them for interesting thoughts and secrets. It didn’t look like he was finding anything juicy, until he stopped at one page and read it in its entirety.

“I got asked out by a guy in my maths class. He’s nice, but really boring. Just like everyone else in my life. Even if I wanted to go out with him, my dad wouldn’t allow it. He says men are the devil and the only one I can trust is him. Yeah right, Mr it’s 5’oclock somewhere. Even if I took that seriously, he doesn’t have anything to worry about. The only guys in my life are complete clichés. So very predictable, so very dull. I’m so bored of this same old-same old. I want something exciting, an adventure. I need some thrills in this beige goddamn existence!”

He repeated back to me the words I had written just a week prior. He turned to me with a predatory look in his eyes. He let the diary fall from his hands carelessly and I knew then that I would be his prey. He took his gloves off and reached a hand towards my knee. He stroked and squeezed my leg and then journeyed up higher, fingers crawling underneath the hem of my skirt.

“Be careful what you wish for, doll face.” He smirked, darkly.

My breath caught in my chest and I felt a warmth in my core.

"I thought you said you were gonna behave." I peeped.

"I did, didn't I? I guess I lied."  

He pulled my skirt up and ran a finger along my panty covered slit. He was turning me on. I wanted him. He was everything I had been looking for, but it was wrong. I couldn’t give in to this.

"Please... Stop..." I pleaded pathetically.

"Mmm, I don't think I will."  

He softly rubbed my folds through the white cotton. My breath got heavier and I felt the heath build.

"It would be so easy for me to push these little things out of the way and slide my fingers inside you, right now. Wouldn't it?"

"Please... Don't..."

He giggled darkly.

"Oh, princess. You're just too cute."  

He smiled as he moved the material to the side exposing my entrance. He slid his fingers up and down my slit, my juices covering the tips. I squirmed at his touch and tried to scooch back in my seat.

"Correct me if I'm wrong, doll, but you wouldn't be this wet if you didn't really want me inside you." He cooed. His words crashed into me like rocks. He could read my body just as well as my diary. I couldn't hide my desire from him and I didn’t want too.  

He continued to rub for a few more seconds before plunging a finger deep inside me. I let out a gasp at the sudden intrusion and he smirked, seemingly satisfied with my response. He worked me with his finger, pulling out before sliding it back in and deciding to add another. He slowly pulsed his fingers inside me, palming over my clit as he slid in and out, again and again. The swell of warmth in me grew as I rocked my hips.

He pulled his fingers out entirely, leaving me disappointed and empty. I looked at him as he examined the juices coating him. He smiled at me and raised them to his mouth, sucking them clean.

"Mmm. You're so sweet." He said as he lowered them, his voice now deeper and slightly raspy.

He unbuckled his seatbelt, then did mine. He pushed the bag off my lap down to where my feet were and reached his arm around my waist, pulling me backwards, closer to him. He leaned me against him as one hand travelled up from my waist and wrapped around my throat. His other came down, pulled up my skirt and parted my thighs. He pushed my panties to the side once again and introduced his other hand to my wetness. His two fingers sliding in and out, but this time a little faster and much deeper. I let a yelp escape my mouth and his hand squeezed harder around my throat. His hot breath in the crook of my neck gave me goosebumps and sent chills down my spine.  

He explored my walls entirely, hitting all the right spots, hot pleasure pulsing through my muscles as they clenched around his talented digits. He palmed my clit applying a gentle amount of pressure and rubbing in circles. I bit my lip in an attempt muffle my moans.

"Nuh uh. Let me hear you, baby girl." He taunted in my ear.

Two fingers from the hand around my throat pulled my mouth open and played with my tongue.  

"You got something to say, princess?" He pushed his fingers deeper into me until his knuckles stopped him from going any further and pumped them, his thumb circling my clit in sweet slow motions. A loud moan escaped my throat and he smiled evilly.

"That's better." He snarled as he put his full hand back around my throat.  

My legs started to stiffen and I felt my climax build as I tightened around his fingers.

"You wanna cum, baby?"  

He worked his fingers inside my walls and his thumb on my clit, slightly increasing the pressure. His breath came closer to my ear and I felt him take it gently in his teeth. I yelped at the shock of his bite.  

"Mm. So cute."

I rocked my hips against his hand. My release was close, it just needed a little push.

"Cum for me, princess. Cum on my fingers."

As if on his command, the dam burst and my climax washed over me. My legs shook and I moaned as I rode it out. He pulled his fingers out of me slid them in my mouth so I could taste my own juices.

“See, gorgeous. I can play nice.” He buried his face in my hair and took in my scent. He hummed to himself and I felt his grip on my throat tighten. He pulled me forwards and pushed me towards the back seat.

“My turn.” He grinned as he sat up.

I climbed into the back, closely followed by Jerome. I sat down and he straddled me, towering over me with his red hair brushing against the car ceiling. I saw the outline of his hard member pushing against the inside of his trousers. It was right in front of my face and my mouth watered for it. I suppose he caught me looking because he started to palm himself and lifted my chin up so I was looking at him.

“Do you have something sweet for me?” He leaned down closer to me, his grip on my face tightening.

I swallowed and felt the lump in my throat. He crashed his lips onto mine. The kiss was hard and forceful, just like he was. His tongue pushed into my mouth and fought for dominance over mine. It was an easy win for him. He tasted sweet, like the Jolly Ranchers. I assumed that wasn’t the first candy he’d eaten that day. He pulled away from me and smiled, studying my face with hooded eyes.

“Yummy.” He whispered.  

He rose back up and unbuckled his belt. He pulled it from out of its loops, held it in front of him and snapped it quickly. I flinched at the loud sound of the leather.

“Hands.” He ordered in a serious, intimidating tone that aroused me all the more.

I held my hands up to him and he looped the belt in and around my wrists, tightly bonding them together.

“No hands for this. I wanna see how that pretty little mouth works.” He smirked lifting my chin again, tugging my bottom lip with his thumb.

He palmed himself a little more and then unbuttoned and unzipped his trousers, letting them fall around his knees. I could see through his boxers that he was fully erect already. He slid them down and they joined his trousers. Jerome was big. I was worried I wasn’t going to be able to take it all, especially without the use of my hands. He balled my hair in his hand and gripped hard. I gasped at the sudden pain.

“Come on, princess. You know what to do.” He pulled me forwards and plunged into my open mouth. He let out a hiss of pleasure.

He raked his free hand through my loose hair before clenching it in his fist. He used his grip on my head to move me up and down his shaft, prompting me to start. I swirled my tongue around him and started sucking. He hissed again through gritted teeth and pushed in further. My tongue climbed up and down his shaft, licking the sticky coating of precum from him and teasing the head. I hollowed my cheeks and bobbed up and down, letting my saliva cover him.

“Oh, yeah... Fuck, pretty girl.” He groaned in his throat and bucked his hips forwards with force.

He hit the back of my throat and I gagged. The noise seemed to please him so he did it again and again and again. My lips touched his base as he assaulted my throat, gripping tighter on my hair with each thrust. I looked up at him, tears streaming down my face and eyes begging for breath, but it just pushed him further.

He let out a primal growl and pushed my head right into the back of the seat. He held me steady and started to thrust into my face fast and hard. My throat was aching and my jaw was locking. His breath was shallow and erratic. I could tell he was close. I sucked harder for him and my throat clenched tightly.  

“Fuuuuck...” He groaned finally coming to a stop.  

I felt him throb and twitch in my mouth as his climax shot straight down my throat for me to swallow. He was still for a few seconds, then he pulled out with a pleasing pop. He looked down at me catching his breath with a smile.

“Don’t have to tell you twice, huh?” He laughed and lowered his head to kiss me.

He didn’t seem to care he’d just cum in my mouth and kissed just as rough as the first time. This time biting my lip as he pulled away. He slid his hand back up into my hair and balled it again.

“As great as that was princess, I’m still harder than Chinese algebra. So...” Jerome climbed off my lap and shoved me down onto my front.

“All fours.” He commanded.

I positioned myself on my knees and elbows, which was difficult considering my wrists were tied. I felt him roll my skirt up and part my legs. I swallowed. After having him go so rough on my mouth, I was nervous about how he was going to be with this.

“I gotta say, this is some view back here. Shame I don’t have a camera.” He said caressing my thighs.

He hooked his fingers under the band of my underwear and slid them down around my knees. I felt so exposed and my face started to heat up and turn red with embarrassment. I couldn’t believe I was allowing myself to be this vulnerable for a criminal lunatic.

He started to rub my entrance with two fingers. Warmth welling in my core, any thoughts of reservation vanished from my mind. I felt a fast, harsh sting as he brought a hand down to spank me. I gasped at the smack and he stroked the spot where it landed, where there was sure to be a red handprint.  

“Now I really wish I had a camera.” He giggled darkly.  

I squirmed at his touch and tried to close my thighs, desperate for friction, but he kept them spread by sliding his knee between them.

“Oh no, gorgeous. I need you open wide.” He smirked.

I whimpered needily, wanting nothing more than to take him inside me.

“You want something, baby girl? Speak up.” He taunted evilly, sliding his fingers along my slit. He raised his hand back up and then... another spank.

All I could do was whimper. I didn’t want to say what I wanted from him.

“I can’t hear you....” He sing-songed. “What do you want?”  

He circled a finger over my clit teasingly. He was purposefully not giving me enough. Just baiting me. He brought his hand down again for another swift spank. I was sure there was a bruise forming.

“I want you...” I whispered.

“What’s that?” He mocked, sliding his fingers in the slickness of my entrance.

“I want you! I want you to fuck me!” I snapped. I couldn’t take the teasing and taunting any longer. I just needed him.

He chuckled menacingly.

“You want me to fuck you? You wanna take me?”

“Yes! Yes! God, yes!”

He laughed at my neediness. I felt pathetic.

“Sure thing, doll.”

He lined himself up so he could enter me and pushed forwards, grasping hard onto my hips. I moaned loudly as he filled me for the first time, making a low, throaty groan. He reached deep into me and set me on fire in places that I didn't even know were there.  

He kept a quick rough pace, digging his fingertips into my flesh tighter to keep me still and steady. I knew he was leaving marks, but I couldn’t have cared in the slightest in that moment. His thrusts made me whine and whimper for him, to have more of him. He growled like he was letting out some kind of inner beast.

He let go of one of my hips and slid his hand up my back and into my hair. Once he had a good fistful, he pulled it like a leash, tugging my head up and back. I gasped at the sharp pain, but the sound only seemed to feed more into his sadistic wanting and he pounded harder into me. The feel of how deep he was inside me banished all the pain and replaced it with pure pleasure and I bit down hard on my lip to stifle wanton cries. I felt another rough tug on my hair.

“Don’t you dare, little girl. Let me hear it. I wanna hear everything.” He demanded through short, quick breaths.

He pulled back on my hair again and I released a squeal of half pain and half pure elation. I could feel myself tightening around him. I was getting ready to burst.

“I... I’m...I’m gonna...” I panted.

“Oh, no you fucking don’t.”  

He gripped the back of my scalp and pulled me backwards, slamming me down onto my back and climbing on top of me.

“I wanna see it this time.”

He had acted so fast, I barely had time to register what he was doing and he was back inside me almost as soon as he had pulled out.

He buried his head in the crook of my neck, sucking and kissing, his teeth leaving delicious hickeys and bitemarks. When he came back up for breath, he wrapped his hand around my throat and pushed my bonded arms above my head, which I was grateful for as they were getting squashed between us. He crashed his lips onto mine for a rough kiss. His tongue demanded entrance to my mouth, which I gladly allowed.

With his other hand he caressed and stroked his hand down my thigh and under my calf. He then pulled it up and pushed it back so far it almost reached my shoulder. He adjusted himself to straddle my lower thigh and picked up a faster, harder pace. With my leg like this he was able to plunge deeper. He was forceful and powerful and I relished in every thrust. I cried out completely taken by my lust for him, closing my eyes to savour it all. I felt the sting of a slap on my cheek and flashed them back open.

“Right here, princess. Eyes right here.” He said, his voice low and raspy.  

His pupils were completely dilated, leaving only the thinnest ring of green around them. He seemed to be an apex predator that was in the midst of ravaging its prey and I was only too willing to be led to the slaughter.  

“Exciting enough for ya, sweetheart?” He smirked with a fiendish giggle.

“Uh huh...” I nodded dazedly.  

His laugh continued through the onslaught of fierce, deep thrusts pounding intensely into my lower regions. I tensed around his pulsing erection as I felt my climax creep back up on me. I let out loud erotic moans, as he built up more and more of that blissful warmth in my core.

“That’s right. Cum for me.” He grunted through gritted teeth, tightening his grip on my throat.

His pounding got faster and rougher, hitting my sweet spots exactly right. I was right on the edge of what I could tell was going to be a fantastic release. I got louder and louder as I came closer and teetered the brink.

“Yeah.. I... I’m.. Yeah... I’m gonna...”

“Go on, princess. Cum. Cum for me.”  

My orgasm shattered through me like a rock through glass. My body convulsed as my moans turned into lustful screams. The ferocity of it was unlike anything I’d ever experienced before. The sheer ecstasy took me higher than I’d ever been before. I was on a cloud and I could have stayed there forever. Jerome followed shortly after, growling like a beast as he exploded inside me. He collapsed breathlessly on top of me as I gently floated down from that little piece of heaven.  

“Oh, baby girl. I’m keeping you!” Jerome dropped a kiss on my lips and lifted himself up.  

I came to my senses and started to register the severity of what I had done. Or had it happened to me?  

“What does that mean?” I asked, nervous of his answer.  

He pulled up his underwear and trousers and tidied himself up, even taking time to straighten his tie.

“It means, baby doll, that this is gonna be the start of a beautiful friendship.”  

He laughed his signature maniacal cackle and hopped back in the driver's seat.

“Hey! Are you gonna untie me?” I called to him starting to get very worried.

“I don’t know, doll. I kinda like you like that.” He laughed.

He turned the key in the ignition and revved the engine.  

“Hold on, doll!” He cackled again, before speeding off again.

What have I gotten myself into?

#Gotham #Jerome Valeska #Jerome X Reader #horrible nasty smut #Gotham smut #Jerome Smut #Valeska smut #quite lemony #jerome x reader smut #jerome valeska smut #jerome valeska x reader #jerome valeska x reader smut #gotham smut

[nobodyfamousposts]

My-Crack-Ulous: FOP Crossover

*Coughs* Ahem.

Fairly Odd Parents.

Oh, but not what you think! We’re not getting Cosmo and Wanda for a sad Marinette or Adrien. Oh, no...that would be easy.

No, no. Instead, we’re getting Norm the Genie.

Norm the Genie who wants to be free of his lamp but needs a magical stooge to trap in his place and, hey! Kwamis are magic, aren’t they? Not that he knows much about them since they predate the known universe and even Norm isn’t that old, but still!

So somehow Norm’s lamp ends up in Paris. And just happens to end up in Lila’s hands.

Lila, of course, tries to use it to her advantage.

It goes about as well as you should expect...

____________________

It took a few years before Norm’s lamp found itself back in the human world. And of course, it was only a matter of time before it ended up in someone’s hands.

Granted, he hadn’t expected to end up in Paris, France.

Or for his new beneficiary to wear an incredibly unfashionable jacket and have sausages in her hair.

Oh wait, that was her hair. As sausages. Gross.

“So you’re a genie?” She asked.

Norm had to avoid rolling his eyes.

Teenagers. They thought they were so special, so smart. That if something were to happen to them, that it was only for good and because they deserved it somehow. And for how smart they liked to think they were, none of them ever really questioned what the catch was. Or if their wishes were something they should make at all.

This one was no different.

“And you can grant me any wish?”

“Yep.”

“ANY wish?”

“I just said for the seventh time, yes. Any wish. Three of them. Rule-free.”

Not that she knew what Da Rules were, but meh. Details.

“Then I get sucked back into the lamp.”

Of course, he didn’t mention his propensity to twist the wishes for fun. Seriously, if these people were stupid enough to just take advantage of his powers without considering consequences. Or the complete lunacy of just expecting a magical creature to grant them whatever they wanted for no reason just because they ask for it.

Seriously, these chumps never learn.

Now all that remained was for this latest chump to start and he can begin his fun of finding the best ways to twist her wishes for entertainment…

Lila smirked.

“Well then…I wish for Ladybug to be beaten and forced to bow before me!”

Pause.

Norm raised an eyebrow.

“Wait—seriously?”

He shrugged.

“Okay.”

Suddenly, there was a POOF!

And when Lila blinked, there before her was the image of red with black spots.

Ladybug.

By which is meant the lowercase insect “ladybug” kind instead of the uppercase superhero “Ladybug” kind, much to Lila’s disappointment.

As if to further insult her, the bug proceeded to point in her direction, in a facsimile of a bow.

Lila stared.

Norm sighed.

“Ya know, kid, normally people don’t make it this easy. I barely even had to do anything. I feel kind of cheated.”

“WHAT IS THIS?!” Lila demanded, gesturing to the insect.

“It’s your wish. Duh. I mean, I knew people made stupid first wishes but...wow. This is actually worse than the sandwich.”

She wasn't even going to ask.

“My wish was about Ladybug! Not just a normal ladybug! I’m talking about the superhero, Ladybug!”

Norm shrugged. “Well you should have been more specific.”

She practically growled. “Who else would I be talking about?!”

Norm, for his part, was less than impressed.

“I’ve been in a lamp. How should I know?”

Lila huffed before storming over to her computer and turning it to face Norm, showing a picture of a heroine in a red leotard with black spots in mid-swing between buildings.

“THIS is Ladybug. A magical do-gooder who protects the city from Hawk Moth. I want to see her destroyed. Brought low in every way that matters and forced to beg me for mercy.”

“I see.” Norm said, not really getting it at all.

Kids these days, was he right?

“So grant my wish.” She demanded. “I wish for Ladybug, the superhero, to be beaten and kneeling before me.”

Upping it, wasn’t she?

He shrugged. “Fine.”

POOF!

Some distance away, in the middle of an akuma fight, an injured Ladybug was sent flying back into a delivery van full of discarded papers to be shredded for recycling, scattering the papers around her. Winded, she fell into a kneeling position. It just so happened that one of the many papers that on the ground right in front of her was a poster of Lila from one of her photo shoots with Adrien.

Ladybug took no notice of this, being much more concerned with the akuma attack. She quickly pushed herself up and leapt back into the fray.

Lila and Norm watched this on a television from the safety of her apartment some distance away.

“What the hell was that?!” Lila demanded, spinning on Norm.

“Your wish.” He answered bluntly. “She’s beaten. She kneeled.”

“But not to me!”

“Technically, she did.” He corrected her, gesturing to the TV where the now rumpled and sad-looking poster of her image rested where Ladybug had once been. It seemed the hero had even stepped on it once as she took off. Norm bit down the smirk at the unintended irony.

Lila glared at him.

Then she seemed to realize something as she suddenly gained a thoughtful look.

“Can I wish for more wishes?”

Oh, NOW she starts asking smart questions.

Norm stared at her, considering.

He should lie.

He really should lie and say she couldn’t.

From what he’s seen of her so far, this girl seemed a few wires short of a Crock-pot, and speaking of, he was starting to get some flashbacks. His previous time working with Crocker reminded him full well why it was a bad idea to let the humans know they could wish for additional wishes. Plus this girl was already giving him the feeling that the sooner he was away from her, the better.

…but he had spent years as a urinal cake and given what Lila had told him about magical-based superheroes, well, how could he turn away from an opportunity?

“Sure.” He finally answered, much to Lila’s glee.

“Then I wish for three more wishes!” She exclaimed. “And for my first wish, I wish that Ladybug—the superhero Ladybug whom you just saw would be forced to kneel before myself—the me that is right here before you.”

Lila smirked, figuring that it was specific enough that there was no way this could be turned against her.

How little she knew.

The POOF of Norm’s magic was immediately drowned out by complete chaos as something came crashing through the wall and into Lila’s bedroom.

Lila screamed as she was blown back, and covered her face in a limited ability to protect herself from further onslaught.

Coughing could be heard, but it wasn’t just Lila. She dared to peek through her hands and…

Of all people, it was Ladybug crouched on the floor of her room, coughing and waving away the dust and debris.

And sure enough, her position of trying to regain her bearings had her turned in Lila’s directions, head bowed and on her knees. Just as Lila had asked for.

But not in the way she had wanted.

Norm had conveniently vanished from sight, so there was no one else for Ladybug to see besides Lila. Realizing where she was and who she was in front of, Ladybug couldn’t hide her initial scowl before she was able to mask the expression and focus in on the task at hand.

“My apologies, civilian.” She bit out. “Akuma attack. Just stay here and stay safe for now. This won’t take much longer.”

And without another word, she shakily got to her feet and turned back to the attack.

Given Ladybug’s state, Lila could have been in a perfect position to try to interfere. Grab her. Maybe even get her earrings.

But the crash had sent Lila herself falling back, and she was even more unsteady than Ladybug.

She tried to push herself up, but realized that in the chaos, some debris had landed on her leg, preventing her from moving.

Of all the rotten luck!

Ladybug left without further ado and Lila was stuck in her room with a hole in her wall and no way to move from her spot on the floor.

Conveniently, Norm reappeared once she was alone.

“Soooo…just a suggestion, kid, but maybe you should try wishing for something else. Something that doesn’t involve superhero ladybugs.”

“Shut up.” She groused as she struggled to push the broken bits of her desk off her leg and grunting in pain.

Norm, of course, did not shut up.

“I take it you want to use your second wish to restore your room? And your third to wish for more wishes?” He asked, but it was clear he wasn’t actually asking.

“Yes!”

The sooner the better.

With another POOF, her room was restored and her leg, while still injured, was no longer pinned. Cautiously, she rose to her feet, hanging onto her bed for stability.

As if to further mock her, it seemed that Ladybug had successfully defeated the akuma as the Miraculous Cure swept through the area, restoring everything else.

Norm blinked in surprise.

“Huh. Didn’t know that could happen. Well, that was a waste of a wish, huh?”

Lila twitched.

__________________

“Okay. Okay.”

She had thought about this long and hard.

Much to her frustration, it seemed wishing anything against Ladybug directly was doomed to failure. Lila attributed it to Ladybug’s magic and natural luck. There could be no other reason for it. Lila’s phrasing and intentions had been fool-proof.

Norm’s smirks and passive aggressive comments didn’t mean a thing.

As such, Lila reluctantly turned her focus away from her arch nemesis to the more civilian side of things and decided to target someone who had no such protection.

The only one to figure out she was a liar: Marinette Dupain-Cheng.

She didn’t know how the other girl knew so quickly. Or what led her to the truth.

And Lila didn’t particularly care.

Marinette was just another thorn in her side. Not nearly as irritating as Ladybug, but still enough to want her gone. And since Lila had a genie and three more wishes to use to her advantage, it seemed Marinette would serve as the perfect way to test it.

And so, Lila made the first of her next three wishes.

“I wish that Marinette Dupain-Cheng was forced to leave Francois Dupont.”

A bit on the extreme side, admittedly. If she was being honest, Lila would have preferred to keep Marinette around and wish her to be miserable in some other way instead. But she had the power of a genie at her command and given Marinette’s annoyingly clever and intrusive nature, it would likely only be a matter of time before she caught on to Lila’s new advantage and tried something to relieve her of it.

So the brat had to go.

And oh, what a wonderful scene it was when two serious and official looking men stepped into the classroom to ask for Marinette to go with them to the Principal’s office. The goody-goody left the room looking scared. Everyone whispered and looked to each other in confusion, questioning why and what happened. Who were those men and what could they want with Marinette?

Lila practically felt downright giddy at the sight! She couldn’t wait to see the other girl in tears!

It was almost two hours later when Marinette was brought back to the room by Principal Damocles. Both looked pale and fatigued. But Marinette in particular looked almost tearful.

“Pardon us, Ms. Bustier, but Marinette is just here to gather her things.”

Lila had to hold herself back from grinning and instead put on a fake look of concern.

“Oh no! Marinette, are you all right?”

"Girl, what happened?" Alya asked, worriedly.

“What did those guys want?” Adrien questioned in concern.

Marinette shook her head. "I'm being transferred.”

Here, Lila did smirk even as everyone else around her gasped in dismay.

Damocles patted Marinette’s shoulder, his fatigue giving way to cheer. “Those gentlemen were representatives of one of the most highly acclaimed private art schools in Paris, and they came to interview Marinette for a place in their program!”

"WHAT?!"

Any smirk Lila did show immediately dropped.

“They saw my hat at the fashion show and other designs from my website, and once they heard that I was complimented by Audrey Bourgeois, they decided to offer me a scholarship to come to their school." Marinette explained, looking a mix of excited and anxious.

“That’s wonderful!”

“You deserve it, Marinette!”

“That’s right! It’s a great honor!” Damocles continued. “Of course, they were rather insistent about arranging the transfer, but it’s early enough in the school year and—”

Lila didn’t pay any attention to anything further of Damocles’s prattling and barely even noticed the way everyone else in the classroom cheered and showered Marinette in congratulations and praise.

Nobody paid much attention to Lila for the rest of the school day. Which was just as well, as it allowed her to skip out and storm back home.

Where she found Norm. Sunbathing on her balcony. And messing with her laptop.

He only noticed she was there when she slammed the door open.

“What?” He snarked. “Not what you wanted?”

“Undo it. NOW.”

“You sure?” He asked. “I mean, she’ll still be gone. There’ll be no one to call out your depressingly obvious lies. And with her not being around as much, your little followers are bound to lose touch with her over time and be all yours to screw with.”

“The point is for her to be miserable! UNDO IT!”

The next day, it was with some disappointment as Marinette informed her classmates that while the school had wanted her, the school only had limited slots and apparently the men who came to interview her hadn't been aware the vacancy had already been filled.

"It was still a bit too early for me to start there anyway." Marinette added. "I double checked, and they're a fully fledged lycee. They were apparently figuring I could skip ahead a grade and start there sooner."

"Weird."

"But impressive!"

"Yeah, you totally deserve it, dudette!"

"You'll just have to try for next year." Alya said, moving to wrap an arm around Marinette’s shoulder. “But I’m glad you’ll be with us for a while longer.”

Marinette smiled back, happy and relieved. “Yeah!”

Lila glared at the happy group from around a corner.

So this fell through. But next time would work.

She was smarter than some shut-in genie. She was bound to find a way to make a wish that would give her exactly what she wanted.

And when she did…

Lila smirked.

Ladybug would be as good as gone.

#ml fic #ml crossover #fairly odd parents #lila sucks #ladybug #marinette dupain cheng #be careful what you wish for #lila is not careful #my-crack-ulous

[rebeccccccaaa]

ᴘʀᴀᴄᴛɪᴄᴇ ᴍᴀᴋᴇs ᴘᴇʀғᴇᴄᴛ

_______________________________

ᴘᴇᴛᴇʀ ᴘᴀʀᴋᴇʀ x ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ (𝟷𝟾+)

ʀᴇǫᴜᴇsᴛᴇᴅ: (ANON) Soft romantic Valentine’s Day sex with Peter, bonus points if it’s their first time.. or maybe their first Valentine’s Day being married 🥺🥺🥺🥺 (since it’s way past v-day, i did like a tony’s gala/charity party thing hope that’s ok)

ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢs: smut 18+, super fluffy and silly smut, virginsssss

Tw: harassment/sexual assault

ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ’s ɴᴏᴛᴇs: hey bug I’m still trying to get used to the whole writer thing it’s still a pretty new concept but thank you for being so patient with me! I tried to make this a realistic when it comes to first time sex as possible, it pretty awkward and goofy, a little sudden, but i think it’s pretty cute

________________________________

Peter couldn’t take his eyes off of you. You moved so gracefully between the bodies of rich chatty folk. Now that you both were adults it was mandatory according to Tony that you guys had to attend these things. Peter wished he could go back to when you two would watch Star Wars and play video games up in your room during these boring parties.

“Dude, you gotta just grow a pair and ask her on a date,” Sam interrupted.

“Come on man. It’s not that easy,” he argued.

“Yeah it is; you just go up to her and say, ‘Hey I think you’re hot, I’m in love with you, Let’s fuck’,” Sam joked.

“Hey, no. They’re virgins. They don’t ‘fuck’,” Nat said amusingly. 

“What! No- I- uh,” Peter stammered over his words heavily as Nat, Sam, Bucky and Steve laughed around him; not at him of course, well maybe Sam. 

“Hey man it’s ok,” Steve reassured.

“Yeah, Steve is still a virgin,” Bucky joked, making Steve push him unamused.

“Seriously though, it’s ok having not done anything. Virginity and purity culture is gross and weird and way too fetishized nowadays. You do it when you feel comfortable and with someone you completely trust; and remember just like everything else, practice makes perfect,” Nat winked at Peter, making him blush. 

Peter thought about it and honestly he trusted you the most with his life. It wasn’t a secret that Peter really liked you; well apparently it was a secret to you. He was so in love with you but he was positive you didn’t feel the same way. You were so beautiful there was no way in your right mind that you’d even look in his direction.

You were talking with some douche at the bar. Peter hated how close he was standing to you. He didn’t think he deserved someone as special as you but he certainly knew that someone like that guy didn’t deserve even your attention let alone a conversation. Although looking at it, it seems like you’re just listening and he’s yapping away.

“You’re like one of the hottest bitches I’ve ever met,” the guy slurred.

You’ve been stuck with this guy for the past twenty minutes. Every time you think you could slip away he tugged your arm and pulled you back in. this guy was drunk off his ass and every slurred word went through one ear and out the other. 

“I need to use the restroom, excuse me,” you tried to leave.

“That’s not gonna work on me princess, come here,” he grabbed your waist and you moved your hands between your bodies.

“Hey, what the hell?” Peter said, noticing the commotion between you and that guy.

The guys looked over and saw that you were clearly uncomfortable and none of them were having it. Peter especially was fuming. This guy's hands were all over you and he knows you didn’t let him. His face buried uncomfortably in your neck and your face held a fearful look. Peter stomped through the crowd to help you.

“Hey man, get your hands off of her,” Peter said sternly. 

“Oh, ho, ho. Cute,” the guy mocked.

“Lay off kid. Help a brother out,” he slurred.

“Peter,” you whispered desperately.

“She doesn’t seem interested, so back off,” Peter pushed him. 

“I’m not gonna tell you again, kid. Leave us alone, sometimes women might not say what they want but they always want it,” he growled disgustingly. Peter looked at you and saw nothing but terror and fright; there was no way in hell he was leaving you.

“Hey, man. We’re gonna give you ten seconds to get the fuck out here,” Nat said intimidatingly; but with a man’s misogynistic ego that big he surprisingly didn’t back down.

“Now,” Steve’s voice boomed loudly towering over him.

“What are you gonna about it?” he mocked.

Bucky wasn’t having it either and grabbed his collared-shirt with his metal and dragged him towards the exit. 

“If I ever see your ugly ass face again, I’ll kill you,” Bucky’s voice shook the man and he scurried away.

You looked at Peter and hugged him tightly softly crying into his shoulder. He held you tightly and whispered softly in your ear soothing you. You couldn’t get rid of him and you didn’t want to think about what could’ve happened if Peter and the rest of the guys didn’t help you.

“Sorry, for the ruckus,” you whispered, noticing the people watching confusedly at you guys.

“Don’t be, guy was a total piece of shit. Are you ok?”

“Can we just leave?” you asked him.

“Of course,” Peter held your hand tightly and led towards the elevator.

“Hey kids, you guys ok? Steve told me what happened,” Tony asked you two.

“We’re gonna go upstairs now,” Peter told him quietly.

“Of course,” Tony said remorsefully.

“Kid?” Tony whispered to Peter, “Use protection.”

“Seriously, Mr. Stark?”

“Hey, I’m kidding. I’m kidding; take care of her will ya?”

“Your room or mine?” Peter asked you.

“Yours.”

“Can we watch a movie or something?”

“Yeah.”

Peter gave you his clothes for you to change comfortably in and you went to the bathroom to change. In the meantime Peter too changed into a tight black shirt and sweats. Suddenly he heard the door open slightly and you peeked your head out worriedly.

“Uh Pete,” you called him.

“Is everything alright?”

“The uh, the pants you gave me? They don’t fit,” you whispered shyly.

“Oh no, uh ok hold on,” Peter scurried to find another pair.

You opened the door wider tugging his shirt in holes it might cover your modesty; this was the most undressed you’ve ever been in front of a boy. Peter looked back at you frantically but definitely did a double take seeing your bare legs so exposed. 

“Sorry, I can’t seem to find anything,” he stuttered a bit.

“It’s ok, the shirt’s pretty long,” you tiptoed to the bed covering yourself with the blanket.

“Sorry about you know,” he sat with you.

“It’s ok. I just kinda wish I was more like Nat. You know then maybe I wouldn’t have been in that situation, I’d be able to kick his butt,” you chuckled. But Peter didn’t.

“Hey, you weren’t in that situation because you weren’t physically strong, it was because that guy was the scum of the earth.”

“Thanks, Pete,” you placed your hand on top of his; Peter’s stomach flipped when you did. 

“Peter?” you asked him.

“What?”

“You’re staring,” you smiled.

“Sorry,” he looked away shyly. 

You and Peter sat on the bed as a movie played. It was one of your favorites and you couldn’t help marvel at the best scenes; your laugh was infectious. Peter couldn’t help but ogle at you. He thought you were so beautiful and funny. He wonders why you’ve never had a boyfriend. Any guy would be so lucky to be yours; expect that fucker who put his hands on you

“Y/n?” he asked sheepishly.

“Yeah?”

“Why don’t you have a boyfriend? If you don’t want to answer it’s ok, I realize that probably sounds invasive, and-”

“It’s ok. I uh- I don’t know. I guess guys don’t like me like that? What about you, you haven’t dated since MJ.”

“I- uh, ok uh- Ok you got me there,” he laughed. 

“It’s just I asked because you’re uh, well, it’s no secret you’re very pretty, Y/n. Any guy would be so lucky to be your boyfriend,” Peter blushed.

“Thanks, Peter. I don’t know, guys are just too,” you couldn’t necessarily find the words.

“Obnoxious, irritating, rude, aggressive,” he finished making you laugh. 

“No, well, yes, but I guess the word would be… overbearing. Guys are so pretentious, you know. And not to mention they want everything but the kitchen sink in a girl. And I don’t have that. Guys don’t look at me and think, ‘Wow, she's the most beautiful girl ever. I want to date her’,” you explained with a faint chuckle. 

“I think that,” Peter blurted out.

“Well, then I wish more guys were like you, Peter,” you said smoothly. 

You and Peter both hadn’t realized the space between you two closing in. Your faces were mere inches apart and you both felt hot and flushed, yet neither one of your wanted to pull away. The sound of the movie playing in the background was drowned out for a second but now it was almost as if it was the loudest thing bursting your eardrums. 

You quickly snapped your head back to the TV breathing out a breath you didn’t know you were holding. You could see the disappointment on Peter’s face when you did out of the corner of your eye but you didn’t think it was appropriate right now. Besides, the last thing you wanted to do was kiss a boy after what happened downstairs. 

You crawled back and tucked the rest of your body under the sheets and Peter did too. You felt like your heart was going to burst out of your chest; terrified that with his heightened senses he could hear your heartbeat. 

He could; and that made his beat faster too.

You two watched the movie in silence after getting yourselves comfortable. Peter’s lights were off and a small lamp along with the bright TV was the only thing illuminating the room. It felt small but you managed. 

You felt like you couldn’t focus on the movie with Peter laying so close to you. You could practically feel his body heat radiating off of him and you wished so badly that you had the courage to tell him how much you liked him. 

You didn’t think he liked you back but after what he said about wanting to date you, you weren’t so doubtful that he felt that way too now. You finally started focusing on the movie again trying your best to not think about Peter but that didn’t help at all considering the two characters … kissing, if that’s what you want to call it.

Your eyes slightly widen seeing the man’s hand crawl up the woman’s shirt. Her gasps and moans seemed louder than you remembered. You could see Peter shifted beside you as the things on the screen became more and more heated. 

“I forgot about this scene,” you cringed at yourself.

“It’s ok, you uh, do you want to watch a different movie?”

“Sure,” you squeaked.

Peter put a new movie on but neither of you could get the images out of your heads. Without the other knowing, you both wondered what it would be like, feel like if Peter’s hands roamed your body that way. Bringing goosebumps to your skin. The way your soft gasps and moans would sound against the shell of Peter’s ear. 

You couldn’t help the wetness pooling between your thighs wondering what Peter would do first. You wondered if he’d ever been with another girl and if he did, well that didn’t sit right with you. You swallowed and unbeknownst to you Peter could sense everything. 

He knew how much your breathing quickened after. He could feel the rapid beating of your heartbeat after watching only seconds of that scene. He could smell the sweet arousal coming out of you as you softly clenched your thighs in a desperate attempt to stop the feeling. 

He shifted beside you embarrassed that he was thinking about these things with you. You would hate him if you found out. But you would really?

“Peter?”

“Yeah?”

“Can I ask you something? Promise you won’t get mad?” Oh no. You were really doing this?

“I could never get mad at you,” he said sincerely.

“Have you ever, you know, done it?” you asked shyly.

“Oh, uh no actually. MJ and I never really talked about that and we broke up before really anything happened.”

“Oh, cool.” 

There was awkward silence between you two not really knowing what was to come next. You wanted him, bad. You just got this urge suddenly to feel him, know what he sounded like. You felt a bit embarrassed and thought there was no way he was gonna want to do anything like that with you.

“Do you wanna…?” Or maybe so.

“Only if you want to.”

“Is that bad that I kinda do? Look,” Peter faced you more comfortably and closer, “I really like you. Like a lot. I know I probably shouldn’t and it’s like super inappropriate right now but I can’t help it. You’re like the most beautiful and most perfect girl I’ve ever met. And I really want to show you but I’d never do anything to hurt you or make you uncomfortable.”

“Peter, I really like you too. There’s no one I trust more than you, seriously,” you sat on your knees facing him too. You smiled at each other warmly and you started to feel warmer than before.

“Can I kiss you?” Peter whispered.

“Please.”

Peter inches closer to you and gently cupped your jaw pulling you in to kiss you. Your eyes fluttered close and butterflies erupted in your stomach. You moved your knee to move closer to him unfortunately directly on top of the remote. 

The volume turned up and startled you both, the laughter and music from the cartoon on the TV echoing in the room. You pulled back sharply, accidentally biting Peter’s lip but he didn’t seem to care all that much as he grabbed the remote and turned the TV off. 

“I’m so sorry! I think I bit your lip,” you panicked and cringed.

“It’s ok, it’s ok,” he laughed; his laugh was so charming and contagious you could help but giggle too. 

“I’m sorry,” you repeated.

“Don’t be, it was an accident,” he chuckled.

“Now where were we,” he smirked and leaned in to kiss you again. 

Your hands went through his hair and you sighed contently as his lips moved perfectly against. You kissed people before but they’ve never felt this amazing. Peter’s tongue pushed past your lips and you gladly let him in. You melted against him and he placed his hand on your back and pushed back slowly to lay your back against the bed. 

That didn’t work out because you weren’t really in a good position to lay down without moving so you tumbled to the floor making Peter gasp.

“Are you ok?” he laughed.

You head shot up from the ground with a big dopey smile on your face. You crawled back up to bed laughing.

“I’m ok, just took me by surprise,” you giggled.

“Sorry, the mood’s totally ruined now I guess,” he smiled sadly.

“Well, I still wouldn’t mind if we tried one more time,” you said timidly.

“Yeah?” you nodded.

“Ok, uh can I uh, is this ok?” Peter had you straddling his lap and your stomach fluttered with anticipation and arousal.  

“More than.”

Peter leaned up and kissed you again, his fingertips sneaking up your shirt and grazing the soft skin of your belly. Your body shudders but you wanted more. You wanted him to make you squirm and wiggle. 

Peter tugged on the hem of the shirt silently asking if he could remove it. You hesitated but eventually lifted your arms up to let him undress you. Your skin was bare in front of him and this was the first you’d ever been shirtless in front of anyone.

Your arms instinctively covered your chest in modesty but Peter grabbed your hands and smiled softly letting you know that there was nothing to hide. You swallowed hard. Nervous about the current situation. You weren’t scared, you were far from it, but it seemed no matter how many times you imagined this, how many times you went over in your head what you would do, you still felt unprepared and clueless about what to do.

“Do you want to stop?” Peter whispered.

“No, I just don’t know what to do,” you giggled.

“I uh, I can kiss you again,” he suggested, making you nod your head.

Peter captured your lips in a kiss once again, he felt like he could stay like this in your arms and you in his forever. He lifted his own shirt and you were taken by surprise considering you’ve never actually since completely shirtless. There were times when his shirt would rise with his hoodie being taken off but never fully off and it’s all of its muscle glory. 

“Peter,” you breathed out.

“Yeah?” he smirked.

You rubbed your gentle hands faintly across his torso and chest marveling at his physique. 

“I didn’t realize how uh, fit, you are,” you gasped.

“It kinda came with the bite, and training of course,” he grinned. 

“I mean look at you; you are even more beautiful than I imagined,” he said.

He leaned forward and kissed along your chest, his hands roaming over your skin. Your breathing became heavy and your hands rested awkwardly on Peter’s shoulders. 

“Relax, princess. I got you. I promise I’m gonna take really good care of you,” he laid you down again, sideways his time so you wouldn’t fall off the bed again. 

He kissed you again before trailing his lips down your throat. You bit your lip smiling basking in the feeling of Peter’s lips against your burning skin. 

“Peter, please. I need more,” you whined. 

“Like…?” he trailed.

“I’m ready. For you,” you whispered against his lips.

Peter groaned and crawled over you eagerly and opened the drawer grabbing a condom. His torso was directly over your head and you took that opportunity to treat him the same way pressing kisses to his torso. 

“Baby,” he snickered.

“What, you don’t like my kisses?” you smiled.

“I love your kisses,” he smirked.

You watched him stand up and slowly pulled his sweats and boxers down. He kept his eyes trained on you making sure he wasn’t gonna scare you or anything. He saw your face fill with fear, confusion, shock; it didn’t matter so he pulled his pants quickly back up. 

“Wait,” you shouted.

“What happened?” you were confused. You thought things were going well, you were excited and aroused when Peter pulled his pants down. The sight of his impressive member surprising you and making you wetter.

“I thought you were uncomfortable,” Peter panicked.

“No! Please Peter! I want to have sex with you so bad!” you shouted dramatically making him laugh.

“Please take your pants off again,” you crawled up to him and grabbed his neck pulling him close. 

“As you wish, baby,” he kissed you and quickly wiggled out of his pants. You took the condom in your hand and carefully tore the foil. You pulled the ring of latex out unsure of what to do next. Peter gently tilted your head up and kissed you softly before taking the condom from your hands.

“I got this, you just get ready and sit pretty for me,” his words made you shudder. You quickly sat back and practically tore off your panties, tossing them across the room. You could see the light in Peter’s eyes started to fade and you could tell he was getting nervous. 

“Hey, having second thoughts?” you asked softly.

“No, it’s just, I don't really know what I’m doing either,” he stammered.

“Well, I don’t really have anyone to compare, so,” you reassured him.

“I just don’t wanna ruin anything. What if I'm not good?” he said.

“Well, practice makes perfect. So let’s start practicing!” you cheered. 

Peter bit his lip and pumped his aching cock a few times. You settled back and opened your legs a bit and Peter settled himself in. His hands trembled as he grabbed his dick and lined it up to your entrance and your breathing quickened. 

He slid past your folds quite rapidly and you grunted. Peter noticed the discomfort and his hips pulled back too far causing his member to slip out. You giggled but Peter grunted. 

“It’s ok, it’s ok,” you pulled him close and kissed his nose. 

“Don’t freak out, baby,” you nuzzled your nose against his.

Peter kissed you softly, “You’re too good to me.”

Peter tried again and slowly passed your slicks folds. You moaned softly feeling his girth and Peter’s eyes screwed shut. He dipped his head in the crook of your neck and nibbled on the skin of your ear. You wrapped your legs around his hips pulling closer and Peter grunted.

“Fuck, Y/n. You feel so good,” he moaned.

“Peter,” you moaned.

Peter hips snapped into you rapidly and your moans got louder. His hand reached for yours and intertwined his fingers with yours. He kissed you again before his body trembled over yours. His hips suddenly stopped and he fell forward.

“Pete?” you whispered.

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to. You felt so good I couldn’t hold back,” Peter whined.

“It’s ok,” you giggled.

“No it’s not,” he grumbled. 

“It’s fine Pete, it was our first time. Don’t sweat it,” you smiled.

“No, sit back, princess. I promised I was gonna take care of you and I fully. Intend. On keeping that promise,” he kissed you in between words. 

You fell back and Peter trailed kisses down your front. His hands rubbed your thighs softly pressing faint kisses to the inside of them. Peter looked admirably between your thighs. He licked his lips and looked up at you almost innocently making your stomach flip at the sight.

“Fuck,” Peter whispered before licking up your slit.

“Peter,” you gasped.

He flicked his tongue over your clit and your hips jolted forward. You wiggled and moved under him gasping and whimpering his name. Peter used his strength and pressed your hips down hard as he continued to eat you out. 

Your hands flew to his hair tugging and pulling his fluffy curly hair. Your chest moved up and down hastily and sweat lined your forehead. You sat on your elbows and looked down to Peter who’s eyes were closed and his face immensely flushed, cheeks redden. 

His eyes opened and stared directly into your eyes. He came up for a second and smiled cheekily before dipping his tongue passed your entrance once again. The pressure in the pit of your stomach built up and up and up, until finally it snapped and your body arched in pleasure. 

You moaned and shrieked Peter’s name feeling ecstatic, overwhelmed with absolute pleasure. 

“Feeling good?” Peter got up wiping your cum off his chin. 

“Oh my goodness, Pete. You gotta do that again!” he laughed before kissing you.

“How was that?”

“Better than I imagined,” you cupped his face.

“I lo-” Peter stopped himself.

“I love you,” you whispered, finishing his sentence. 

“Good, because I love you too, so much,” he kissed you. Peter tucked you in his bed and crawled beside you holding you close.

“Pete?”

“Yeah?”

“Thank you,” you kissed his jaw.

“For what?”

“For the best night ever,” you ggiled.

“Anytime. Like you said, practice makes perfect.”

“Oh, yeah. I cannot wait until we practice again.”

===============

ᴛᴀɢʟɪsᴛ: (For all my work)

@mathletemadison​

@buckybarnes101​

#aged!up peter parker #peter parker #peter parker smut #peter parker oneshot #first time #tom holland smut #peter parker x reader #peter parker x you #peter parker x y/n

[bluefirewrites]

An old Juke riff from the Triad chat. Includes Luke bugging Julie at school and mushy times.  ************ Arms wrap around her and Julie freezes in her desk, but the scent of lemongrass soap helps her relaxes into the hold.

"Calculus test? Lame"

"Luke" she hisses, making sure she's not loud enough to disrupt her classmates... or flag the attention of her teacher.

The ghost lowers his head so he's directly speaking into her ear, "Just wanted to wish you luck..."

Chancing it, she shifts to face him, eyes flitting upwards to take in his face- always ever smiling, whether it'd be genuine or straight up roguish.

"Really? Is that all you wanted to do?"

She's never been more grateful she's in the far back corner of the room...

He does a quick scan of the surrounding desks.

“Maybe I came here to offer my services as your favorite ghost?"

She shakes her head, "No cheating."

Feeling his chin wedge in the crook of her neck, she knows he's pouting.

"Buuuut if you finish sooner then we can do some writing in class,"

She glances up at notices the teacher making his rounds. They need to wrap this up.

"Wait for me at home, okay?"

"Home," he repeats. She likes how he says it. She thinks he likes how it sounds too, "Home it is, boss. Catcha ya later."

With a last squeeze on her shoulder, the weight of him disappears.

Even with all the pleas for him to leave so she can proceed with class, Julie wishes he was still there...

She doesn’t have to wish for it though because as soon as class ended and Julie finished her test, Luke was chilling by her locker.  “I thought I told you-”  A couple people turn around, thinking she’s talking to them and she feigns clueless and looks around until they walked away. Flushed, her phone’s out and pressed to her ear as she approaches the ghost.  “I thought I told you to go home, Luke,”  “Yeah. I did,”  Julie wedges the phone between her ear and shoulder, opening her locker and grabbing what she needs for next period, “What you’ve decided to make this spot in the hallway home?”  Sparing only the briefest glances at Luke, she catches a moment of hesitation. A hint of vulnerability.  And he says it.  “Maybe I just like following home around?” BANG Julie slams her locker shut in shock upon hearing the words. And they were candid. So candid. Not as vague as ‘interesting little relationship’, nothing to misconstrue here.  Oh my god. He really just said- She remains frozen, her phone having dropped from and hitting the ground, and she’s staring at Luke, not saying a word, and he immediately tries to backtrack his previous statement.  “That was weird. Yup. That was too much. Forget- forget I said anything-”  “Luke-” she tries to whisper.  He thinks for a second and then he backtracks his backtracking, “You know what? I’m not taking it back. I- I that’s how I feel and-”  “Uh, Luke-?” “We could so talk about this later, ‘cuz you’re still in school and I bet that’s weird to spring this on you now and- and...” He stops, noticing her eyes emoting a sense of urgency, “What- what is it?” 

"I- I can't open my locker"

Luke's eyes widen, "What?" The ghost optically tracks her ponytail, and sees that while he’s been rambling she’s been trying to break free. 

Apparently in her panic, she had accidentally shut her locker on her hair. 

“Oh my god,”  Julie grimaces, “Yup.” 

She angles her head and shoots her peers an oh so casual smile at them, pretending to be leaning against the locker when, in actuality, she's actually stuck. If there’s a word for extreme mortification, this, this right here, is it. 

It ate away so much of her hair that she could barely move her head to look at her lock to put the combination in so there she remains. Now she’s debating whether or not to expose her dumb mistake by waving over someone. It’s already too much having Luke here witnessing this.  She tugs at her trapped strands and immediately winces and Luke’s by her side instantly. 

"Ok ok ok. Don’t move," Luke jumps to her rescue, "Sit tight, I got this."

Then, Julie, trying not to visibly react to his arm phasing through her locker, patiently waits for Luke to fiddle with the locking mechanism, until she hears the click.

She's able to throw open her locker and release her ponytail. Luke's hands hover over her, "Are you okay?"

Massaging her scalp, she nods, "Yeah. Thank you. Sorry, I spazzed and it just-" You said I was home... and I freaked... "Don't worry about it," He tries to not make a big deal out of it.  The bell rings and Julie realizes that the typical hallway traffic has thinned out. She’s going to be late for dance.  “I need to go,”  “Yup,” Luke pops the ‘p’, shifting between his feet awkwardly.  “I’ll see you later?”  “Sure,”  Neither of them make the move to leave. Luke doesn’t poof away immediately.  Julie should be going to class, but she stills.  She’s waiting.  Until there’s no one left in the hallway.  Then, she pops onto her tip-toes and presses a quick kiss to Luke’s cheek, baffling him.  “Wh- Wh-?” He couldn’t form words, reaching for the spot where lips have been.  She laughs while a blush breaks out on her face, “I don’t want you to take it back either...” Luke starts laughing too, one of pure elation and Julie could see he’s already bouncing on his heels.  She hears footsteps coming down the hallway, “We will talk about this later, Luke.”  “R-Right.” “At home,”  “Yup,” she nudges him, “And you’ll be waiting?”  Luke’s eyes soften, “Always.” With that he poofs out ( he may have let out a loud ‘whoop’ as he did). And Julie stoops to collect her phone (whether or not it has a crack in it, she doesn’t care), shoulders her backpack, and books it to the locker room.  It’s only her 4th period, but she already can’t wait for the day to be over.  The sooner she gets back home, the better.  Tagging: @blush-and-books​, @lydias--stiles​ , @thedeathdeelers​, @ruzek-halstead​, @pink-flame​, @ourstarscollided​, @nottheleastbrave​, @echocharm17618​ @smolfangirl​ 

#juke #jatp #julie and the phantoms #julie x luke #luke x julie #palina #juke-box #i was reminded by these two riffs i did and connected them and added a few more things to it #we need a little cuteness

[lallyloo]

Jealousy

(So @imincognitohere and I were talking about EB recs, and porn, and how Link’s entire porn collection would consist of a dark haired guy with glasses and a John Mayer lookalike. Then we imagined Rhett finding Link’s JM porn collection and crying, and then just railing Link. And now we’re here.)

*

He’s not really supposed to be on Link’s laptop, but Link’s running behind and Rhett really needs the May 2022 Ear Biscuits schedule now.

He silently curses himself for not keeping the schedule on his own laptop, or even his phone, but Link’s the one who types during planning sessions and they’re always together, so it’s never mattered before.

But today Link’s stuck in traffic on the way to the creative house, and Stevie’s trying to book their first guest in nearly two years, and Rhett needs the info now.

And they have each other’s passwords for this very reason.

So Rhett waits for the sign-in screen to appear, and he types Link’s password.

RaisinCRUNCH1984!

And he’s in.

 The desktop is just a line of neatly organized folders against a backdrop of some douche playing guitar.

Rhett stares at the douche for a second.

He knows his name is John Mayer.

But in Rhett’s mind he’s just ‘douche’.

Link’s crazy about his music but Rhett’s not, and the guy seems like a tool anyway.

And why does Link need him on his desktop? Why not Christy? Or the kids? Or hell, why not him and Rhett? Would that be too much? No.

And sure, Rhett’s desktop is a silhouetted photo of himself in Death Valley, but that’s neither here nor there. It was a great trip, and it’s a great photo, and it’s not just some random musician guy.

Rhett tears his gaze away from the background and scans the labels on the desktop folders, stopping when his eyes hit one called ‘May’. It seems to be the most obvious choice, likely full of schedule info, brainstorming, personal appointment times, etc.

To Rhett’s surprise, the files inside seem to have much more random names than the desktop folders.

It doesn’t seem like Link at all, and Rhett is a bit flummoxed as he reads down the list of random letters and numbers jumbled together.

He settles on a file called 324_eB_32_MMdrmfanta.

He’s in such a hurry he doesn’t pay attention to the file type, and Rhett realizes it’s a mistake as soon as he clicks it.

It’s not a list of dates or information. It’s not a schedule.

It’s a video.

And it looks like porn.

There’s a room. An office maybe? The camera pans and there’s a desk and a chair and a window.. and a bed. Yep, it’s porn.

The camera pans to socked feet, and up bare legs, over a little red speedo, to a bare chest, up to the face of someone who looks a bit like a younger Link.

Dark hair, blue eyes, glasses.

There’s a knocking sound in the video, someone at the door, and Rhett is curious to see who might walk in. It’ll be a blonde woman, he assumes. A Christy lookalike.

“Link you dirty dog..”

He’s invested now, curious to see what kind of fantasies Link is into. He knows Link and Christy’s relationship has its ups and downs, and Link’s blue balls have been an ongoing joke for years, and maybe he’s invading their privacy a bit by watching this video.. But it’s not actually Link and Christy. It’s just porn. Just a fantasy Link has. And they’ve talked about fantasies before. Hell, Rhett told him about the first time he ever jerked off. Watching a little porn video is nothing.

The guy with the glasses heads for the door and Rhett is enraptured as the scene unfolds – slipping off the chain lock, a hand on the doorknob, turning it slowly. Rhett wonders what the woman’s going to be wearing. What she’s going to say. What they’re going to do. How they’re going to fuck.

On screen, the door opens and Rhett pulls back a bit, surprised, when he realizes there’s a man on the other side of it. Another brunette, with longer hair – not as long as Rhett’s, but longer than Link’s. And flowy. The guy’s kinda pretty.

Huh. Maybe it’s a threesome video? Two guys and a girl? The guy with the glasses looks surprised but pleased, and Rhett stares at the screen, wondering when the girl will show up.

The other guy says something Rhett doesn’t register, and then he steps into the room, wraps the glasses guy up in his arms, and shoves his tongue down his throat.

The unmistakable sound of a porn sax overdub echoes through Link’s office, and Rhett pulls himself out of it. He clicks through the video, skipping ahead, his eyes growing wide as he gets quick glimpses of erections, blow jobs, sloppy kisses, a finger in a butthole, AND IS THAT HIS TONGUE?? And fucking, so much fucking, fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck. Rhett skips to the end to see the long-haired guy trailing his tongue over the glasses guy’s dick, licking up every messy drop of cum.

And. Oh.

The girl never showed up.

Rhett closes the video.

So Link watches porn. Gay porn.

And he’s never told him.

Rhett can’t help but feel a little confused. And a little jealous.

Why hasn’t Link told him? Why haven’t they talked about it?

Does Link like guys?

Rhett’s never been into guys. Not once, like ever.

Well, sure, he’s thought about Link once in awhile. What it might be like to touch him. Kiss him. Maybe more.

But that doesn’t count. Because it’s Link.

It’s Link!

Rhett’s not into guys. Link doesn’t count.

And if Link is into guys he clearly doesn’t want to tell Rhett yet. And that’s fine.

Isn’t it?

Rhett is a little hurt, but he’s alright with letting Link tell him in his own time. That’s what best friends are for. They’re cool and they’re understanding and they’re patient. And Rhett is all of those things.

He closes the folder, and his eyes fall to the desktop again.

To that douche.

With the familiar face.

Why does he suddenly seem so familiar?

Rhett stares at him for a moment and his blood runs cold.

The video.

The guy at the door with the stupid floppy hair.

Rhett quickly opens the folder again, choosing another file at random.

Cheesy porn music starts and Rhett watches another slightly geeky dark-haired guy with glasses flirt with a dark-haired flop. Rhett skips ahead quickly. There are blowjobs, and the flop is lifting the cute geeky guy, kissing him, spreading his cheeks as the glasses guy gasps–

Rhett closes that video, and clicks another one, and moans fill Link’s office as the video starts right in the middle of a fucking scene. Two guys. Another cute eyeglassed guy with dark hair, and some long-haired jerk. As Rhett watches, he catches sight of a guitar in the background and his face burns hot.

“Rhett?”

Rhett fumbles with the laptop, slamming it closed, but the video keeps playing and the moans of two guys echo through the room as Rhett turns towards the door.

“Link!”

Link looks furious.

“Dude, what’re you doing??”

“I was just looking for– ”

“You’re snooping on my laptop??” Link pushes past him and opens his computer, typing in his password.

“No! I wasn’t! I was just– ”

Link clicks the little x in the top corner of the video and the room falls quiet as he turns back to Rhett.

“That’s my private stuff.”

“I was looking for the Ear Biscuits schedule!”

“And you thought you’d just watch some of my porn while you were in there?”

“It said May! I thought it meant the month!”

“Well it doesn’t mean that!”

“I know that now!”

Link looks at him for a moment and then rolls his eyes. “It’s a stupid name. I’ll.. rename it.. and hide it, I guess.”

“You don’t have to do that.”

“What if you need somethin’ else in the future?”

“Well I’ll know not to look in the John Mayer folder.”

Link makes a sound, something akin to a squawk. “What??”

“That’s what it is, right?”

“It’s– I mean, it’s..” Link stutters, unable to look at him. “NO.”

“Oh, come on.”

“It’s not.”

Rhett gestures to the laptop, which still sits open on the desk. “You’re tellin’ me all those dudes with the long hair don’t make you think of… him?”

Link doesn’t answer the question, he just frowns. “I should’a called it something else.”

“Like what?”

“I don’t know. PORN maybe?? THIS IS MY PORN RHETT DON’T LOOK AT IT?? Does it need to be that obvious?”

Rhett can’t help but laugh, “That wouldn’t help at all. You know it’d only make me more curious.”

“True.” Link says, and he’s smiling now at least. “So fine, I’ll call it something you won’t care about.”

“Like what?”

“Well I’m not gonna tell you, ya dummy.”

Rhett raises his hands in defeat, “fine, fine.”

The room is quiet for a moment as they look at each other, and Rhett can’t help it when his gaze moves from Link’s face down to the idiot on the screen.

He’s so smug. So full of himself. He writes stupid lyrics and people just swoon over him. Link swoons over him.

But Rhett writes lyrics too. And he sings. What’s wrong with his songs?

“What’s John Mayer got that I ain’t got?”

Link’s eyes nearly bug out of his head. “WHAT?”

“I didn’t even know you liked guys,” Rhett says quietly, “and now you’re into HIM of all people.”

“What’s wrong with HIM?”

“Well, for starters, he’s a– ” Rhett stops himself from calling the guy a name. Yeah he’s a stupid dumb idiot who steals the affection of certain best friends, but Rhett doesn’t need to say that to Link. He doesn’t need to make him more upset. “He’s not.. ”

“I know you think he’s not cool,” Link rolls his eyes again. “I don’t care.”

“It’s not that.”

“Well what is it??”

“He’s not.. me.” Rhett can feel his face start to burn the moment the words are out of his mouth. It’s stupid. He’s stupid. What is this? What’s he even doing?

“Not you??” Link laughs. “Dude, don’t tell me you’re jealous of John Mayer now too.”

“Well, I wasn’t,” Rhett says, and Link shoots him a skeptical look. “I mean, maybe just a bit. But now...”

“Now what?”

“After I saw those videos..” Rhett chokes out. “Link, why’re you thinkin’ about him and not me?”

“Rhett, you’re not into guys!”

“And you are??” Rhett can’t seem to help the hysterical tone in his voice.

“Well, yeah, man.”

“Since when??”

“Since.. always, I think.”

“What about Christy?”

“Christy knows,” Link shrugs, “she’s okay with it.”

“Oh.”

Rhett thinks of his own wife and how she’d react if it were him.

Lately Jessie’s been more open-minded than anyone, more willing to learn and explore and grow. Would she be okay if he were.. if he liked..

And he already knows the answer – has heard her say a hundred times, a hundred ways, ‘we’re not who we used to be.. so whatever that means for you and Link, that’s fine by me. The four of us can figure it out.’

Rhett hadn’t questioned her at the time. Hadn’t realized what she meant.

“So, look, you found my porn,” Link is saying, “but I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do about this whole jealousy thing you’ve got going on. I’m not gonna stop watching it just because your feelings are hurt.”

“But..”

“But what??” Link asks, exasperated.

“I want you to think of me.”

“Look,” Link sighs and takes off his glasses, rubbing a hand over his eyes, “I used to think of you..”

“When??”

Link shrugs. “Awhile ago. Years.”

“Why’d you stop??”

“Rhett, listen, I knew it was never gonna happen with you so I made myself stop.”

“And it’s gonna happen with John Mayer??”

“No,” Link laughs, “it’s just a.. just a stupid fantasy.”

“So let me be your fantasy.” Rhett hates himself the moment it’s out of his mouth – he’s never said anything more embarrassing – and Link just gives him an odd look.

“Dude..”

Rhett cringes, “I know.”

“I’m not gonna fantasize about my straight best friend.”

“But I want..”

“Rhett, WHAT.”

“I’m not into guys,” Rhett tries to explain, feeling like an idiot, “but I’m into you.”

“Well, I’m a guy.”

“I know, but you’re – ”

Link steps forward, and before Rhett can say anything more Link leans in and kisses him. It seems to be a test at first, gentle, and then Link slips his tongue out, pressing against Rhett’s lips, encouraging Rhett to open for him.

And Rhett does. He doesn’t even question it. His brain just screams, yes! Finally! And he’s kissing Link, soft and wet, and an ache shoots through his body, straight to his dick.

When Link pulls away, Rhett’s still got his eyes closed, his head tilted, with a smile plastered to his mouth.

“Did you like that?” Link asks.

“Yeahhh,” Rhett sighs dreamily.

“Then you’re into guys, you dummy. The percentage don’t matter.”

Rhett’s eyes snap open. “Okay, I’m into guys.”

Link looks at him, wide-eyed, and smiles. “So kiss me again then.”

Rhett does, taking hold of Link’s face and kissing him, and he knows he’s supposed to be doing something else. He came in this room for a reason. A file or something.

But none of that matters because he’s kissing Link and Link’s kissing him back, and as Rhett pushes Link up against the desk they bump the cable on Link’s laptop and it beeps to notify them that it’s come unplugged.

“Hold on,” Link mumbles, pulling away to plug the cable back in, and Rhett’s eyes are fixed to the photo on the desktop.

Stupid John Mayer douche.

He’ll never have Link.

“What’re you lookin’ at?”

Rhett glances up to find Link watching him curiously.

“What?”

“You’re staring at my laptop like you wanna murder it.”

“What,” Rhett sputters, “no I’m not.”

“You really are jealous, huh?”

“No.”

“You sure?”

“Link, I’m fine.”

“Guess I’ll just leave it open then,” Link smirks. “Since it’s not botherin’ you.”

Rhett reaches past him and slams the laptop shut. “No.”

Link laughs. “You’re like a jealous girlfriend.”

“Boyfriend.”

“Oh, you’re my boyfriend now?”

“Maybe,” Rhett says, and he’s dying. Literally dying. Link’s never going to let him live this down.

But Link kisses him again and suddenly Rhett doesn’t care. They’re kissing and Link is touching him. Link’s hands move down to unbutton his shirt, so Rhett grabs hold of Link’s shirt and tugs it up and over his head.

“What ones did you watch?”

“What what?”

“The videos, which ones.”

Rhett nearly chokes, looking away, and Link takes him by the chin and pulls his gaze back.

“You can tell me.”

“I don’t know,” Rhett admits, “I just skimmed a few.”

“Well what’d they do in them?”

“Blowjobs,” Rhett says, replaying the scenes in his mind, “lots of fingers everywhere. Fucking.”

“Fucking?”

“Yeah, tons of it.”

Link’s fingers slide down Rhett’s belly, stopping at his belt, and the buckle clinks as Link undoes it. “You wanna act it out?”

“Act it out??” Rhett feels like he might actually scream.

“Yeah.”

“DO I HAVE TO BE JOHN MAYER?”

“No!” Link laughs and shuts him up with another kiss. “Just be you, dummy.”

“You want me to– ” Rhett stammers, speaking against Link’s lips, “Want me to go to the door?”

“The door? Why?”

“To knock? Like in the video?”

Link laughs again, and at least Rhett’s managed that. If nothing else, he can always make Link laugh.

“You watched the dorm fantasy video?”

“I don’t know.”

“Guy studying? Red speedo?”

“Ohh, yeah, that one.”

“And how’d it end?”

Rhett’s eyes go wide. “Fucking.”

“Right,” Link says, smiling back at him. “So you wanna just skip to that?”

Rhett’s died. He’s a corpse.

But he manages to breathe out, “Yes.”

Link opens a drawer and tosses a bottle of lube on his desk, and he’s saying “come on, come on,” and Rhett’s brain finally returns to him, because if there’s one thing he’s good at it’s using his dick.

He’s not quite sure of the next step because he’s never done THIS. But Link walks him through the lube and the prep, and god, his ass is beautiful, and now Rhett gets to fuck it, and when Link’s hand slips over Rhett’s dick, slicking him up good, Rhett’s knees nearly give out.

Then Link’s turning away, still talking to him, teasing, asking, “You gonna fuck me better than John Mayer would?” and Rhett grips his hips and slides in slow, easing in deep, gasping at how tight Link is around him.

And Link groans,“Oh god.. fuck, you’re in..

And moans, “Rhett, do it.”

And Rhett does.

He fucks the hell out of Link.

Plows him into the desk.

Tries to fuck John Mayer right out of his mind.

Just rails him.

And Link keeps gasping, “Yeah, like that, yeah, Rhett, fuck me like that,” and when he breathes out “better than John Mayer ever could..” Rhett stops and grabs hold of him, turning him around, needing to see him, wanting Link to see who’s fucking him and giving it to him so good.

Link goes easily, seemingly happy about it, and when Link is bare-assed on the desk with his dick in his hand, Rhett hooks his arms under his knees and fucks in again.

“Tell me,” Rhett sputters as he fucks with everything he’s got.

“Tell you what?” Link is looking up at him, dazed, and they both know Link’s teasing.

“Tell me I’m better.”

“Better than who?”

“You know who,” Rhett grits out, and he’s going to come. Soon. Real soon. And he needs to hear it so bad. “HIM.”

“Oh..” Link grins, and his voice catches in his throat as he says, “John Mayer?”

Rhett can only nod, silently begging Link to give him what he needs.

“You’re better,” Link smiles up at him, his breath stuttering, and Rhett can feel him tighten around his cock. “You’re so good, Rhett, fuck, you fuck me better than anyone.”

“Yeah,” Rhett gasps, pulling Link’s knees up higher, fucking in tighter, harder, faster, and he nearly folds Link in half when he leans in to kiss him again.

And Link breathes against Rhett’s mouth, “No one fucks me like you..” and he comes, shooting hot between them, and Rhett groans and stills, coming hard inside Link.

“Fuck, yeah, so much better than him,” Link sighs, “You’re bigger too.”

And Rhett’s pretty sure he passes out.

When he comes to, he’s still holding onto Link, and he lets go slowly, easing his legs down.

“You alright?” Link’s asking, with a little worried expression on his face.

“Yeah,” Rhett says, “was I out long?”

“You were out??” Link sits up quickly, getting a better look at him.

“I think so,” Rhett shrugs, “I dunno. Maybe it was just too good.”

Link laughs, “Dude, stop.”

Rhett stares down at him, looking hurt.

“What, you’re sayin’ it wasn’t good?”

“Rhett– ”

And Rhett knows he’s teasing again, and he knows it was good, but Rhett pushes against his chest anyway, encouraging Link to lie back down on the desk.

And Rhett leans over and licks up every messy drop of cum from Link’s chest, and sucks his dick clean too.

He’s clearly better than John Mayer.

And he definitely likes guys. Especially Link.

#rhink #fic #rhink fic #my fic #jealous rhett #i apologize for the formatting #tumblr hates when i post from my laptop

[pies-writes-and-more]

Hungover Love

word count: 2,688

pairing: UniversityStudent!Akaashi Keiji x Fem!Reader

warnings: characters getting drunk and hungover - all assumed to be of legal age

a/n: I don’t know where this came from but I started writing it so here it is haha. Got the idea from @moanlightlust‘s list (can find it here!) so thank you! I’ll bold the prompt down below (I kinda changed it for the sake of the story but still got the idea from their prompt list :)) Thank you to @satan-ruler-of-hells​ and @thisnoodlewritesao3​ for reading over this for me! Love you both :)

haikyuu masterlist

“Akaashi?” You repeated the name for the second time as you strained your ears to hear something besides bar music and Bokuto’s loud voice in the background.

“Hm?” The small grunt made you smile, knowing he was probably slumped over on a chair, holding his face in one hand and leaning on a table in front of him, with his other hand pressing his phone a little too hard on his ear.

You let out a small laugh, pausing the show you had on your TV so you could hear him better, “Akaashi, you called me. Did you need something?”

There was another grunt on the other end of the line, and you chuckled as you heard Konoha teasing Bokuto about something in the distance, “What is it, Akaashi?” You inquired some more, listening to him hum quietly to the song playing.

“Y/N Y/L/N,” he mumbled and you just shook your head with a smile. God he must’ve had far too many drinks to be this out of it. “I fucking love Y/N Y/L/N. It almost feels like she can hear me right now,” he was saying and you just laughed. “Like I can... I can hear her laughing.”

“Akaashi, you idiot,” your face felt hot but you tried to ignore it. He was drunk. Very clearly drunk. He didn’t mean anything by it - the last time he was drunk, he told you he was going to leave his college volleyball team and join some new sport because Bokuto was getting on his nerves. 

It didn’t mean anything. It didn’t. It didn’t matter that those were the words you had been waiting to hear from him. It didn’t matter that you’d spent the last two years pining after him. He was drunk.

“Didya know... the other day.... Y/N smiled at me cause I said something funny- what did I say... I can’t remember what I said but I said something funny and she smiled and I just.. God it’s that smile ya know?” Akaashi’s voice seemed so much lighter than it did usually. You could tell that he was smiling and just imagining that goofy drunk smile on his face made your heart skip a beat or two.

“That’s nice,” you tried to keep things casual, avoid getting your hopes up too much. You didn’t want to ruin what you had with him - the nice fun friendship that was definitely just a friendship.

“Y/N?” Akaashi suddenly seemed a lot more present, as if just realizing you were on the line. 

“Yea?”

“Y/N!” The smile on his face was probably a lot bigger from the sounds of it, a chuckle slipping from his lips, “I love you, Y/N! I’ve loved you ever since I met you when you picked up my runaway ball for me back in high school. You were so pretty then and you’re super pretty now. Like you get prettier every day I see you-” his speech was quick and slurred, you could almost feel him getting drunker by the second.

“Akaashi-”

“Bokuto keeps telling me that I need to tell you but I dunno if I can because I’m pretty sure you like that dude that lives across from you and-”

“Akaashi-”

“But I guess I wouldn’t know until I told you right? So I’m telling you because I like you. I really like you. I wanted to bring you to that new ice cream place down the road from your place but you always seemed so busy and I don’t want to bug you, plus volleyball takes up so much time, and then there’s school, and I don’t even know how to balance volleyball, school, and a girlfriend-”

“Akaashi!” Your voice was louder this time, biting down on your inner cheek as his name left your lips. You needed him to stop - it had to stop. Your heart was fluttering too much and you couldn’t even tell how much of this was true. You wanted to tell yourself that alcohol could bring out people’s true feelings, but it also made you do dumb shit. And wouldn’t confessing to someone you didn’t actually like be considered dumb shit?

“Ya that’s me,” Akaashi mumbled, clearly a lot more tired than he seemed five seconds ago.

You tried not to laugh, tried to swallow your fears and your feelings, your heart feeling like it was beating a thousand times a minute. “I need you to go sober up, get some rest and drink lots of water okay?”

“But-”

“No but’s! You obviously drank way too much and honestly, I’ve never heard you talk like this before and I can’t even tell if it’s you anymore,” you acted like you were scolding him, putting up that wall again like you had so many other times before. He couldn’t really like you, could he? There was no way.

“Y/N Y/L/N, I fucking love you!” Akaashi yelled into the phone, making you cringe a bit at the volume.

Your chest was tightening, you couldn’t tell if it was fear or hope but whatever it was, it was scaring the shit out of you, “Shut the hell up! If you love me so much tell me when you’re sober, dammit!” You yelled back, immediately hanging up the phone. Your eyes widened as you watched the call screen disappear, your mouth suddenly feeling very dry.

The next few hours were radio silent from both Bokuto and Akaashi. You refused to text either of them in fear that you might accidentally say more than you wanted to.

It’s fine, he was really drunk from the sounds of it so he probably won’t even remember it right? I mean, the last time he got super drunk, he didn’t remember challenging the bartender to a pushup fight so... so he won’t remember.... right?

You paced in your room for a bit, glancing at your phone every five seconds to see if there was any sort of notification from either of your friends. But nothing. 

You barely slept a wink that night, tossing and turning while facing dreams of Akaashi laughing in your face the next time you saw him.

You thought I meant that? It was just a joke, Y/N.

I only see you as a friend, sorry.

Don’t you think you’re reading into our friendship a little too much? That’s all there is. Friendship. 

The idea of Akaashi awkwardly laughing in your face, giving you that half smile while dismissing your feelings haunted you for hours. By the time the sun came up, you gave up on the idea of sleeping and threw your blanket off of you. It was time to figure out how to survive your day without thinking about Akaashi Keiji at all. 

It wasn’t easy. Everything reminded you of him. Half of your Netflix was shows you were watching with him, or movies you’d already seen with him next to you. Your homework wasn’t any help either (though you definitely needed to get it done). Akaashi would normally come over and study with you, his adorable glasses making him look like some young professor, twirling his pencil around in his fingers while nodding along to some song stuck in his head. You couldn’t get used to studying on your own.

Radio silence finally broke when you texted Bokuto, asking if they all made it home safe last night and he responded with a very badly spelled text message saying, “himw safe so tirwd need adcil heaf hurtinh” (aka. home safe so tired need advil head hurting) 

Your lips curled into a small smile - at least Bokuto was alive. And the fact that he wasn’t all up in your face about Akaashi meant that the setter probably hadn’t said anything last night, or at least, it meant that Bokuto was too busy tending to a hangover to think about it.

A knock on your door made you jump, watching it for a moment before slowly approaching.

“Oi, open up, I know you’re in there.”

You calculated the odds and realistically there were only 3 reasons why Akaashi would be at your door right now, while he was still probably very hungover.

A. He was tired of listening to Bokuto complain about being hungover while also hungover and wanted you to help take care of him.

B. He wasn’t actually hungover and wanted to hang out.

C. He remembered your phone call from last night and wanted to confront you about it.

...

There was no way it was B or C so... it had to be A right?

You opened the door with a smile on your face, trying to pretend like this was the first time you spoke to him since you saw him earlier yesterday.

“Hey, what’re you doing here?” You asked, welcoming him in and watching his movements as he shuffled inside. He was wearing his sunglasses and wincing a little so... it definitely wasn’t B. He was definitely still hungover.

“Good morning to you too,” Akaashi chuckled slightly, groaning as he made his way over to your couch and flopped onto it. “God, my head is killing me,” he grumbled.

You felt almost a bit of relief - he wasn’t bringing it up so... it must mean that C wasn’t an option right? “I’ll make you some tea. Want something to eat?”

He made a noise that you assumed was a yes, grabbing some ramen packages that you liked to have whenever you were hungover.

“How’re the boys?” You asked as soon as the tea was finished, handing it to him as he sat up with a huff.

“Fine... I told them I didn’t want to get drunk,” he rolled his eyes. “But Bokuto kept pouring shots and being a little bitch when I didn’t want to have them... something about how he didn’t want to lose his best friend or something.”

You laughed, shaking your head slowly as you moved back to your little kitchen, “You’re always so busy studying. Bokuto probably just misses having you around.”

“We live together.”

“Ya well you’re always either on campus or here with me so I can see why he’d miss you,” you smirked, humming softly to yourself as you let the noodles cook. Things were okay. Things were normal. Things were going to be fine - all your worries were slipping away-

“So are we not going to talk about it?” 

Akaashi’s voice made you jump, turning around to find him standing right behind you and slowly sipping on the tea.

“Fuck, Akaashi, don’t do that,” you glared at him, hitting his arm, “Could’ve made me burn myself.” 

“Sorry,” he gave you a small smile, leaning against the nearby counter. “But we are going to talk about it, aren’t we?”

The ramen so clearly needed stirring and stirring was a full focus kind of job and this was obviously why you were looking into the pot and not looking at Akaashi, even though you could feel his eyes watching you, “Talk about what? Bokuto missing you?”

Akaashi chuckled and lifted his finger to under your chin, tilting your face to look at him, “I drank a lot. But I don’t think any amount of alcohol could make me forget how embarrassing I was.”

“Embarrassing?”

He watched your eyes for a moment before pulling his hand away from you and looking down at his tea, his smile slowly stiffening, “We don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to. I don’t want to make you more uncomfortable. I just thought I should apologize and let you know that you don’t have to reject me or anything. I like being friends with you and that’s enough for me, even if there’s a part of me that wants more.”

You almost dropped your spoon on the floor, staring at him with wide eyes, “S-Sorry what? Apologize? For... for what?”

“For confessing to you while drunk,” Akaashi’s smile was turning more sad now, taking a slow sip from his tea. “I’d been considering telling you how I feel for a while now and I guess I should’ve stopped myself from drinking sooner to save you the embarrassment.”

“Embarrassment? Akaashi, don’t be an idiot,” you ignored the soup still dripping from the spoon and whacked his arm with it.

“Hey!”

“You’re telling me you were drunk enough to confess to me and to remember what you said but not remember what I said at the end?” You huffed, hands on your hips now. 

Akaashi’s eyes lifted to the ceiling in thought, his lips pursing slowly like he did when he was concentrating on getting an answer right on his homework, “I know you seemed mad,” he finally responded, shrugging a bit. “I figured it was cause I put you on the spot like that.”

“No you absolute meathead, it’s because after months and months of pining after you, weeks of Bokuto almost spilling my secret on multiple different occasions to you, him almost screaming to you once about how much I love you, you end up telling me you love me over a drunk phone call and I can’t tell if you’re being serious or just a drunk dummy!” You scold him, hitting his arm again with your hand and shaking your head. God, for a boy with as high of an average as he had, how is it possible that there were no brain cells running around in that head of his?

Akaashi smirked a little, watching your eyes as you ranted, a playful smile on his lips, “So... you love me huh?”

“You better get out of my sight before I dump this ramen on your head,” you glare at him, trying your best not to smile because his smile was just so contagious but ugh that evil little smirk of his-

His lips were suddenly on your cheek, pressing a soft kiss to your skin and letting you feel the smirk still toying on his expression, “Drunk or not. I do love you, Y/N Y/L/N.”

“Y-Yeah yeah whatever,” you avoid his eyes some more, your whole face feeling hot and your cheek tingling where he had kissed you. “Go sit, it’s almost done.”

“Not until you say it back,” he teased, hugging you from behind and peppering your cheeks with some more kisses. “You said you love me, you can’t take it back now. Say it again.”

“Why?” you laughed, trying to pull away from his tight hug.

“Because it’s the best news I’ve ever gotten and I want to hear you say it again and again and again,” he insisted, turning you around to face him and smiling down at you. “Pretty please?”

You sighed with a smile on your face because as annoying as he could be, you really did mean it when you tell him, “I love you too, Akaashi.”

Alone time with Akaashi lasted long enough for him to properly ask you to go on a date with him to that ice cream shop, and was then interrupted by Bokuto showing up at your door and inviting himself in with a grin.

Apparently, the cure to Bokuto’s hangover was just knowing his two best friends had finally confessed to each other.

“God, I thought he’d never get drunk enough,” Bokuto grinned proudly to himself after you had happily explained the details to him. “I thought I’d have to just keep ordering him drinks.”

“What?” Akaashi glared at him, putting the pieces together.

Bokuto just smirked mischievously, “You can’t get mad cause it worked. I figured it would take a miracle to get you two to confess. And getting you drunk is basically a miracle.”

The fact that you were laughing made Akaashi want to kill Bokuto a little less, and even though he glared some more at his best friend, he would secretly thank him later for helping him get the courage to get the girl of his dreams. As much as Bokuto could get on his nerves sometimes, it really would be thanks to him that Akaashi got to take you out on that cute date and tell you just how much he loves you every day.

haikyuu taglist (let me know if you’d like to be added!)

@al0ehas @aurumk @neko-chii1 @thisnoodlewritesao3 @satan-ruler-of-hells @trashy-simp @jeppiet​ @tobi-momo​ @darkvadeeer​ @haikyuutothetop​ @livy384​ @babyshoyo​ @jesssobs​ @b-bakana​

#akaashi x reader #akaashi keiji #haikyuu x reader #hq akaashi #haikyuu fluff #pies writes

[obsessive-ego]

Talking in you sleep

Musical beetlejuice x reader

Reader says Beetlejuice's name 3 times in their sleep, but hes already in their home

Sfw

Idk been thinking about this for ages

Just a small fic

It was an accident

It was no secret to anyone that you talk in your sleep, not full sentences, just a word or two, nothing too abnormal, you didn't know about this little quirk of yours until a certain foul mouthed undead demon wormed his way into your life, he was the one who told you.

...

"Ya know you chatter on in your sleep?" He'd  chuckle as if he found something truly embarrassing to bug you about.

"How'd you know? Am I that loud you can hear me in the livingroom?"

"Nah, I watch you sleep" he said it so plainly as if it wasnt super creepy.

The ghoul eventually upped his late night habits from watching you sleep, to sleeping in the same bed as you, he did this so often you stopped setting up the couch for him and just accepted your fate to be spooned every night by a creepy old dead guy who you may or may not have a crush on

...

The nights you've babbled in your sleep always brought on annoying mornings of beetlejuice teasing you, probably lying through his teeth over how you moan his name in you sleep to get you worked up for his own amusement, unfortunately you couldnt prove you didnt since your dreams never really stuck with you long after waking.

Hell with your late night chatter you even manged to summon beej once in your sleep, a night he was spending over at the Deetz, you manged to say his name 3 times in a row, spoken, unbroken, in your sleep, and boy was your face red when you woke up and saw the bastard in question sitting inches from your face with the widest shit eating grin you've ever seen on his face, that was an instance you couldnt deny saying his name in your sleep and dreaming about him, you missed him, of course you think about the demon when you two are apart, even the few days he's with the Deetz and the maitlands.

Tonight wasnt one of those nights, beetlejuice has spent the entire day glued to your side, chatting your ear off about all the scares he and lydia pulled in your absence, his stories always made you smile, the way he practically glowed green with excitement as he retold his showmanship to you.

The night went on with bad jokes and fun stories as the demon filled you in on all the fun you missed while you were doing boring adult breather things and how the two of you should mess with some unlucky breathers so he could show you how amazing he truly was, as if you needed proof that the ghoul was a ham who loved to show off.

As the two of you sat on the couch laughing away, forgetting the movie that basically became White noise to your conversation, a yawn escapes your lips

"Getting tired babes? Am I really that boring" the ghoul teased pinching you cheek

You groan and pull away "well, yeah, unlike you mister freeloader, I worked all day" you shrug before letting out another yawn

"Freeloader? Oh sugar, your words hurt" the ghoul fakes hurt, giving you an over exaggerated gasped face, with his hands over where a person's heart would be "I thought we had the mutual understanding that I was your trophy husband"

You give the demon a soft laugh "you wish-"

"Every night baby~" he purrs pink stripes slowly appearing in his hair

You freeze, it wasnt uncommon for beetlejuice to openly flirt with you, but that doesnt mean it didnt make you freeze up everytime, you werent exactly the type people lined up to date, nor were you very popular growing up, so the sudden and intense attention the demon gave you always made your heart pound.

"Uh, um, I think I'm gonna head to bed" you stammer before getting up "night beej" you mumble before disappearing into your bedroom.

The demon stifles a laugh, god slash satan you were a delight to get worked up, not to mention easy. He loved it, his favourite little breather was always so hot when they were an embarrassed mess.

The ghoul decides to finish the movie the two of you had on in the background, before heading to bed with you, he didn't need to sleep, just enjoyed being snuggled up to that soft warm body of yours, and it was more rewarding to sneak in after you were out cold, bed would be already warm, and with the added thrill of not wanting to wake you.

As the credits roll beetlejuice snaps his fingers and tv goes dark, the ghoul raises from the couch and gives a yawn and a long stretch as if he was exhausted. The demon makes his way to your room, standing outside your door he pauses at the sound of your voice

"Beetlejuice"

It was soft, barely audible, but herd it, guess you were still up, beetlejuice phases through your bedroom door, to be greeted by your sleeping form.

He stifled a chuckle, you were dreaming of him, tomorrow was gonna be great, the ghoul was already busy thinking about ways to poke fun at this in the morning, moaning out his name in you sleep? What kind of dream were you having babes? He could see your face now.

"Beetlejuice" you mumble again in a whisper

"Whoa there babes, you know the rule, one more time and I'm out" he whispers making his way to your bed.

"Beetlejuice" you sigh

"Y/N!" was the the only thing he had time to shout before vanishing.

His shout was enough to make wake you, but not enough to clue you in to what you just did, you grumble out a swear before rolling over and going back to sleep.

The next morning you wake up, a tad confused to not have a snoring dead guy weighing you down, normally on nights beetlejuice would stay over he'd slip into bed with you after you've fallen asleep, using your chest as a pillow.

You dont think much of it at first, heading to the kitchen to make some coffee before getting dressed, you did notice there was no beej there either, waiting for you kettle to boil you give your little home a quick sweep for the demon, nothing.

He's vanished to do his own thing before, he was a grown man, sometimes he'd duck out and mess with the neighbors in your apartment complex, but he would at least leave you a note or something.

You started to worry, what if something awful happened to him? Then it clicked, lydia must had summoned him away to hang out, that had to be it, and with that thought all dread left you so you could carry on with your day, since bj wasnt around you took the opportunity to get a few odds and ends done.

The day drags on into the late evening, you were enjoying the peace as you catch up on some reading.

Your phone rings, looking at the screen you see its lydia, that's odd, she normally texts you if anything

"Hello?"

"Y/n I need to ask beetlejuice something"

"Isnt he with you?"

"What? No-"

Dread returns to you chest, you havent seen him since last night, he left no note, he wasnt with lydia, did something awful happen? was he bored with you? You felt like you were going to be sick

"Y/n?"

"I gotta go" was all you could say before hanging up,

"Beetlejuice!"

Nothing

"Beetlejuice!"

Again nothing, he normally came after the second yell, anxiety for your dear friend make you since to your stomach in fear for the worst, you steady yourself and take a deep breath and say it for a third time

"Beetlejuice"

With a puff of green smoke there stood the ghoul, unfortunately sporting a purple hue

"Bee-"

"It took you that long to notice I was gone?"

"No, I-"

"Why did it take so long then? Enjoying your time without me?!" Red streaks began to show up amongst the purple

"I thought lydia summoned you back-"

"And you waited till now to check?!"

"I DIDNT WANT TO BOTHER THE TWO OF YOU" you yelled back, beetlejuice is taken abck by your volume, you take a deep breath "if I knew why you were gone I would have said something sooner, what happened?" You say calmly gently taking the demon's hand, red now fading away, though the purple stayed

"You sent me away, you said my name 3 times in your sleep and sent me back to the netherworld" he refused to look at you as if you did this on purpose to mess with him.

"Bee, I'm sorry, I would have never done that on purpose, i- i love having you around, and I, god, i miss you when you're not here, with me" now it was your turn to refuse eye contact, admitting such a cheesy thing, you wanted to just die, not that it would help.

The purple hue is quick to leave the ghoul's form in replacement with a much softer pink, you missed him, music to his ears.

"Sugar" beetlejuice grabs your chin and forces eye contact

You give him a soft smile seeing that he was no longer purple, but also when he pulls you into a rather over exaggerated dip and sloppy kiss "so how bout we make up for some lost time and you can make this little misunderstanding up to me, what do you say babes?~"

You only stutter and choke on your words as the demon spins you around

"Would you like to scare some delivery guy and watch a bad slasher?" You finally get out

The demon pauses for a moment, as if to think about this offer.

"Normally I'd be delighted honey, but I think you owe me~ how bout you have to sit on my lap the entire film~" he wiggles his eyebrows suggestively at you, you swallow the lump in your throat, this was gonna be a long night

Bonus

The two of you were snuggled together on the couch, Beetlejuice's arms were around your waist, his head on your shoulder, your bum on his lap.

"So babes, whatever you dreaming about last night?"

#beetlejuice x reader #muscial beetlejuice x reader