#i also have problems reading where if im reading a big paragraph. i tend to read one line over and over by accident

[insufferable-talkstuck]

hey callie (if that's your name), i hope you don't mind me submitting an entire essay of sorts so that you could, you know, classpect me. i've seen the stuff you've been posting here on this blog of yours, and i can't help but like it. so uhhh, let the trauma dumping begin, i guess? i'll try not to take this too far, so i'll give you something more palatable to read. if i do, feel free to call me out for it like you did over mentions of politics that other people did.

so...how would i describe myself as a person?

dude, i wish you had a format like a list of questions or something. is this dumb for me to complain about because by being this open-ended, you're giving other people the choice to say what they want to, with those choices ultimately providing a subtle kind of information that may or may not make your readings/analyses more accurate? probably. am i going to complain about it anyway? well, i just did, even though i'm not usually one to actively complain. that translates to absolutely, by the way. all this text is just a transcript for my thoughts while writing this. no wonder this has gotten out of hand so quickly. but look on the bright side: there's more for you to analyse. fuck yeah to that. :)

back to the question: one thing i can say about myself is that i go on tangents and can get sidetracked easily (see the above paragraph for explicit proof). i'm also a very secretive person, especially in regards to my problems and my inner world. when it comes to that, i can't help but feel like i understand them better than how the external world works. to compensate for this lack of understanding, i tend to, figuratively speaking, wear different hats depending on the situation. usually, im quiet and lay low as i keep an eye on what goes on around me, which i attempt to grasp by myself. other times, i do the exact opposite when i feel like i'm supposed to, mostly in attempts to get others to like me. i'm either too much or too little for the people around me to deal with. hell, i guess i could say i'm wearing a different hat right now through the way i'm typing in this ask, and that's mostly because i'm that fucking terrified of being able to be identified via typing style alone even if i'm anonymous. a person's gotta cover their tracks while admitting personal shit, you know?

so to cope with the fact that i find it hard to make friends due to all this, i've gotten used to isolating myself and being self-reliant, to the point where i straight up pretend to be stoic, cold, and boring to talk to out of well, a lot of things. these things include how i'm constantly terrified of social interaction, i'm afraid of hurting other people through whatever shitty choices and words i decide to make or say, and i can't help but feel worthless all the goddamn time. it even goes to the point where i tell myself that i should be so proud to be so "independent and badass" as a motivator to keep getting away with this despite having this deep, contradictory craving to have meaningful interpersonal relationships in my life, which i tell myself is stupid and that any attempts i make at it are bound to be a waste of time and effort to avoid dealing with it all together. and i suppose that also makes me a hypocrite by default. that's a big yikes on my part.

i also guess that according to some people i used to know, there's a side of me that can be best described as sassy, blunt, with a disposition of innocence and sunshine. i mean, i'm probably being incredibly sassy while typing this all out, aren't i? (which is intentional) if you find it hilarious (like some of my friends did), then i'm glad to hear that the interspersed shenanigans i've been pulling as i prose on endlessly about my flaws have made someone laugh. however, i don't fully buy my sunny, pure disposition as part of who i am as i can't help but feel that only developed as a way to avoid conflict, especially by preventing any sign of my problems and stress from leaking into the day-to-day conversations i had with them at the time. however, there were occasions where both my positive and/or negative emotions got so overwhelming to deal with that i accidentally snapped in front of them. even though i try to prevent those kinds of occasions from happening at all, i regret every single time i lose my composure like that without meaning to due to how i felt rejected every time i did that. and well, in my eyes, rejection scares the everloving shit out of me as well.

i've also been described as a "robot" and a "cryptid" on previous occasions and well, i don't entirely know how to feel about those kinds of descriptors. but i'm not complaining about it because being any of those things sounds badass to me when trying to be positive about it.

so yeah, i'd say that im a person that's damn good at usually playing the role of a stone-cold, sassy hardass with nothing interesting to offer beyond that while wishing it were the truth.

and well, i feel like i've talked enough about myself to feel the need to not mention anything else, so that's where i'll end this. like, i'm usually private about my interests, especially the ones i'm the most emotionally invested im (which can go to the point where I lie about them out of embarassment) and my aspriations in life are something along the lines of "i want to do all this cool shit, but i realistically don't have the energy for all that and worrying about what other people need from me is more important anyway."

hope you got something out of all of this. it was nice for me to type it out, even if all i did was talk about myself. but that's the point, right? and hopefully, i don't regret saying any of this. sorry if this was a long one to read, i hope that doesn't bother you too much.

Witch of heart

my name is Calliope, on this blog, nicknames are appreciated tho i find them sweet.

ah hem, you must excuse me, i am a little rusty, for i have not classpected in a while. But i "tried" my "best" here so take it however you will

you managed to talk about yourself while also avoiding talking about yourself. people majorly view themselves as.. a collection of titles, a community they're members in, interests, morals and their overall attitude twords the world. but you only talked about personality, which is certainly a rare case. No music or art that you're into? do you sit infront of a mirror all day and pass your time on..... self reflection ? you did say your interests are private so, maybe they're too private for even the classpect blog to know. how sad

i assigned you a witch of heart because, you're certainly a steriotypical heart player, from the way you're speaking. i do think I could manage assigning you a blood player with more information... perhaps hit my inbox again soon.

i struggled a bit for the class but then it was obvious, you change heart, you manipulate it to your given situation you put on a... hat. ( why did you say a hat of all things? )

✷ sometimes i add in a little bonus when the answer is too short, my guilt is practically eating me alive for responding with such a short classpecting sesh to such a big ask, but you did use a whole bunch of words to talk about nothing so, not exactly in my pay range to fix my reply, I will say i think you're the first person I don't think I could find a moon for, you could go either side but not in the sollux way, just in the: I think it took you way too long to wake up way

#homestuck #classpect #classpects #classpect assignment #homestuck classpects #witch of heart #<— blood player if anon talks again

[melforbes]

ask meme. what if. patching up. no I still haven’t seen source material

the way i completely forgot about this ask until i wrote like two paragraphs in this and was like oh shit lmao

the source material is getting an hbo series bb you're in luck also ignore anna whatever as tess yes i respect her as an actress yes she is talented in a bunch of things i have not seen but ms annie wersching is the only tess in my heart and also if i have to endure tess being reduced to a powerbitch stereotype i will start foaming at the mouth. but also i have no feelings about this whatsoever <3

WHAT IF: i will pick an important choice or event in my current project and write three sentences (or more?) about if it’d gone done differently

hmmmmmmMMMMMMMMMMMMMm

this is hard because i kind of had a stupid amount of confidence in the decisions i had them make in this and because i have ~a lot of experience~ in flying by the seat of my pants with writing lmaooooo a lot of the time with this ive had some degree of foresight when it comes to certain plot decisions. the only reason i have this in the first place is that with other things ive had kind of sort of plot revelations and then been like "well if i'd set that up three chapters ago it would have a huge impact i think but instead i guess it's just going in this one for a smaller impact" so i think i learned my lesson haha. also because this pairing nowadays has a small and sparse tag i really intentionally put in stuff to make it interesting (maybe the wrong word) to reread. like not Interesting interesting but i wanted there to be certain details that are more relevant on a reread than on an initial read because whenever i read stuff in small tags i tend to read it Multiple Times lmaoooooo and it's like if anyone like me is out there I Will Feed You. I Will Give You Food. you see i have this problem in which im like i dont want to act like i put thought into this because That's Embarrassing and i also dont want to seem like i take this too seriously because That's Embarrassing and also i dont want to act uppity or pompous or something But At The Same Time i do put a lot of thought into certain things and i feel like mentioning that and i dont really want to judge myself for that. it's complicated but also super uncomplicated. where was i going with this

OH right. so most of the plot decisions were made super concretely. like pre breakup arc in the nightmares chapters (which came out so much worse than i intended alkdjksjad;glksjg) when tess and joel talk about ellie Knowing (also legit it is such a trip to me that you dont know the context of that. a trip in a good way) she says we every time and he only ever says i even when she points out that this would affect both of them, and at one point i think he says that tess doesnt understand baseless violence which is 100% untrue, and then there's a bunch of window imagery i put in starting there because im a freak. so like For Once In My Life a lot of this was as planned as it could be. on occasion there's been Plot Revelations that get wedged in (the radio interlude chapter, which was a bit of an inelegant seam between prewritten things that didnt mesh well) but for the most part ive got tits out into every decision. like tess and ellie disagreeing about joel's choice was very planned though i imagine that kind of conversation could be executed many different ways i had my one way and stuck to it. so either way

where was i going with this. did i have a point.

OKAY. let's see. i think one of the big ~emotional beats~ so to speak was the ambush chapter and i think that's the favorite because that's usually where people comment if i remember correctly and initially i wasnt going to go with that tone At All haha. years ago i wrote everyday domestic scenes of mulder and scully from x files and had it all on this blog and it was plotless but largely in the same overarching universe (i say as if it was legit ever That Deep) and after writing this as a oneshot and being like you know? Kind of feel like doing that again. i figured i would just follow the same largely plotless path of legit just domesticity and leave it at that. and i think the first like five chapters are tonally different from the rest because i'd never really intended for it to have plot or really any depth whatsoever. in the end like. How do i say this in a way that wont be interpreted as uppity or something asldkjgalsdgjk like. when i did those mulder scully scenes i was very much a beginner and i think i didnt realize just how inherent that beginner-ness was to the concept itself. which isnt a bad thing! like people had fun with those so far as i remember. bizarrely enough i think people might still read those which. cringe. but you kno!!! but with a few years of distance from that kind of concept i think it was hard for me to Not try something else. especially with this universe in which it's just dense with storytelling opportunity. and also i felt as if the first few chapters were just like super super lighthearted and i wanted some angst factor. which is why in the end the angst factor plot itself is flimsy as fuck. like i did not care WHY they got attacked i just wanted that sweet sweet hurt/comfort cup of tea u feel. and after that i didnt really go for the plot too much But i did edge toward it a lot more. like i mean ultimately this is a romance like it was not intended to be plot heavy ever But it's more plot heavy than it couldve been. had i actually written it as i'd intended from the start i think it wouldve gotten old really fast. like nothing but lighthearted domesticity doesnt make sense in this context. for the first few chapters it doesnt necessarily kill the whole thing imo because like. that's the first few chapters. but after then if there was never any ~deeper thoughts~ i think it wouldve gotten reductive super fast.

hmmm what else. Because i am deciding to talk too much on the internet now.

oh in theory the whole breakup arc couldve been omitted and now in retrospect im like it's hilarious that like the next chapter after they got married i immediately peppered in hints that they would break up lkajsdglaksjgdlkj like wow. That lasted a long time. but like i mean i think with them it fits that they would do something like get married before they even said that they loved each other. like i can see them doing a massive workaround instead of doing a small and simple but vulnerable thing. makes sense 2 me. and like they definitely couldve stuck together in the end but 1 theres interesting storytelling in how maybe joel was too stubborn or maybe they grew apart in certain ways or blah blah blah and 2 I JUST LOVE A GOOD BREAKUP AND THEN RETURNING TO EACH OTHER ARC OKAAAAAAAAAY. legit. favorite trope. if i ever experienced that in real life i would claw my eyes out but in fiction it makes me FERALLLL. and also like i mean i lov these two for their dumb quirks but also like it would be a lil wrong to say there wouldnt be consequences for like. Not communicating haha. also again like the world this game is put in is so full of storytelling opportunities and im like Must Take Them All. like joel is stubborn as hell and shuts down when he's overwhelmed and there is growth in the first game (and in the second too but thats not really shown as much and is more left for the player to fill in the gaps i think) but also i think it would be super easy to regress in that sense and i had fun with putting him in those situations. and it's also super fun to have an additional person for the joel and ellie plots to bounce off of. like joel and ellie are two very stubborn people and having an extra person there to be like You Blithering Idiots has been a good time. im getting sidetracked. like it was fun to answer the question of how these two in a marriage neither of them can fully substantiate would communicate in hard times and the answer i personally found was that they both would end up breaking things. which was fun to write!!!!!!!!! but in theory couldve been prevented. maybe i just cant imagine this a different way haha. like Joel And Tess Learn Healthy Communication Skills Over Time. am i mean for saying that doesnt sound probable aldskjgalskdjgslkgj

OH LMAO THE MARRIAGE PART. that was also a big decision i guess. i wouldnt make it go differently alksdjglasdjg like. i definitely couldve written the context around that many different ways bc again this whole is full of opportunity But a frankly premature wedding just feels right to me. especially with like going from being stuck on survival to being safe for the first time in decades. and then having that sense of safety get boring and wondering why there was that super fast wedding in the first place. cant really imagine it going differently

there is later unposted stuff that could def have gone many different ways and that i tried to make go different ways but that would not be right to talk about akldsjaslkgdjsg so.

this got too long sorry <3

[serialreblogger]

some of your post/reblogs were so relatable to me that more and more I think I may have ADHD (I'm like, at least 70% sure of this and the 30% is me searching for a psychiatrist/therapist that I can trust/afford, anyway) so, since your how to essay post Im talking myself to ask if you have some study tips or tips to focus, anything to help, really. I'm in college and I can't focus to read 2 paragraphs which makes me anxious and makes me procrastinate because I can't study and I HAVE to study so I avoid everything but then I think NOW I have even less time to study and I got stuck in this circle. And because I can't read anything I also cant bullshit my way writing papers that I have to so I don't do this too, so I'm just spiraling more and more with this which also doesn't help with the depression. And I'm so, so SORRY to dump my problems on you (this isn't my intention here) but if you have some tips or don't mind talking about what you do to study I really appreciate it with all my heart.

oh friend, i’m so sorry to hear you’re goin through that, it’s EXTREMELY relatable tho. everything you just wrote basically sums up my entire first year of university (just add in a couple dozen spiralling panic attacks on the basement floor and you’ll be me), and while i wish i had advice i could promise would solve the issue, i don’t... know? that i would recommend doing exactly what i did? because while i made it through university with ridiculously good grades, i also exacerbated a pre-existing anxiety disorder to the point where i literally could not bear being alive for a while there.

but for whatever it’s worth, and bearing in mind that you need to prioritize your own well-being WAY above whatever grades you get on a stupid piece of paper, here’s some tips on how to get through course readings, based on what i’ve learned through blood, tears, trial and error:

don’t read the full two paragraphs, to start. ADHD makes reading academic articles hell, but (and i genuinely don’t know if this is possible for anyone else, the chemical cocktail of debilitating anxiety that was my brain at the time made me do things i otherwise couldn’t and definitely shouldn’t) i did manage to finagle a way to make it work for me.

See, the thing about academic papers is that they’re very nicely organized. every paragraph is dedicated to making an individual point, which is introduced at the beginning and summarized, more or less, towards the end. this means you can get a very handy-dandy trick, because here’s the thing about ADHD brains: we’re VERY GOOD at making connections.

so here’s the trick: you don’t actually have to read the paragraphs. Not the full ones, anyway.

Let’s break it down:

First, what is the overall reading meant to address? What’s the title of the book or article? Is there a heading or subtitle to provide you with extra information?

Second, what is the thesis statement in your paragraph? Yes, every essay has a thesis statement, but every paragraph also has a specific point to make, which is stated in a sort of mini-thesis, typically right at the beginning.

Once you know this thesis statement, the rest of the paragraph is just fleshing out and providing evidence for that statement. You can keep reading if you need more information to understand what the author’s getting at, but once you’ve got that thesis statement, the rest is just there to get in your way.

For neurotypicals, I think, it’s maybe necessary to read this stuff all the way through? I don’t know. What I do know is that, for ADHDers, we tend to be very, very good at making extrapolations from very minimal information, based on all the surrounding context.

You don’t need to do the full readings. You just need to read the first sentence, process what it’s saying, and skip over the rest.

(if the first sentence of the paragraph is nonsense to you, don’t panic. often the first sentence or even the whole introductory paragraph is intentionally confusing, so if there’s something you don’t understand, disregard it and move on to the second sentence, or the next paragraph.

this happens often, because a lot of academic writing is just a power play on the part of the writer. “Look How Smart I Am Compared To You, You Have To Work So Hard To Figure Out What I’m Saying,” etc. Don’t buy it, tho--the true measure of intelligence isn’t how thoroughly you can confuse someone else, it’s how effectively you can share the knowledge you have. Intelligence is useless if you can’t share it.

Do whatever you can to make it through essential readings, but don’t be intimidated by them. If you can’t understand them, it’s not because you aren’t “smart enough,” it’s because they’re badly written.)

Final notes: this process is meant to walk you through reading papers, but it also lowkey applies to a lot of insurmountable tasks in academia.

You look at a 5-page paper, look at your attention span, and immediately despair because yeah, that’s impossible. The solution is not to expand your attention span, because that’s also impossible. So, instead, don’t look at the 5 pages.

Look at an impossible task, and break it down into its smallest pieces.

Don’t look at the 5 pages, don’t even look at the first two paragraphs. Make a plan for how reading a single paragraph might be possible for you (in this case, break the paragraph down into its own components, and skim over most of them in favour of reading only the most necessary portions). Then focus on finding those one or two sentences you need in the very first paragraph. That’s doable.

You do that, and then you move onto the next.

It’s extremely difficult, especially for ADHDers, to limit your mental vision to the most immediate task and stop looking at the big picture, but it’s also necessary. If you can find a way to make the smallest tasks possible for you, you can break the big, impossible ones down until they’re made of tiny chores. You can do tiny chores. You can read one sentence, take five minutes to process it, but you can read it. That’s all you need to be able to do.

Read one sentence. Skip the rest. Move on to the next paragraph. Repeat.

That’s the real secret, the one that got me through university. It’s impossible to complete a biology lab, it’s impossible to read this entire interminable textbook, so don’t think about the impossible tasks. Think about the single step directly in front of you, focus entirely on that, and eventually, the impossible tasks will be done.

(The other thing I recommend is not taking a full courseload. Please, please, please make sure that in addition to getting your schoolwork done, you also have enough time left over for you to truly relax, and not feel guilty for doing so. If you’re getting intrusive thoughts halfway through an essay, but instead of terrible things you’re thinking about your latest favourite TV show and feel like your brain is thirsty to watch it? You’re working too hard. Take it from someone who ignored their own mental needs until it wrecked them past the point of continuing--burnout is not fun, and you deserve to protect yourself from it. Take it slow. Your wants are just as important as your needs, and both are way more important than your schoolwork.)

#again i genuinely don't know if this will work for you #adhd brains are above all nigh-impossible to wrangle #so if you can't get this method to work for you that's OKAY. you're already doing your best #if possible do get a doctor/psychiatrist you trust to provide a diagnosis bc that will open some avenues for learning assistance #and again. i really. cannot stress enough how little i recommend a full courseload with adhd #stuff takes more time for you! that's just how it works! #if you can get medication and/or extra accommodations from your school i don't doubt that would be 10x as helpful as anything i can provide #but for whatever it's worth #here's how i survived #linden writes an essay #adhd #academia #ask linden

[anchoviesinthenightsky]

I'm revising my fic rn, so here's a little self indulgent post where I talk about my writing/editing habits:

- i think of writer!me and editor!me as two separate entities. This is important during the writing process, so that I don't start critiquing myself to the point of never experiment

- in the same line of thought, editor!me address comments to "we/us" like "we need to rewrite this portion." I thiiink that's a reflection of thinking of these two processes as different personas, but it could just be that I use the royal we to refer to myself a lot. why? no idea.

- i have to listen to taylor swift on repeat. idk what it is about her music but it's the perfect combo of interesting, but not so interesting that i get distracted. this also screws up my spotify data, which is really annoying, so sometimes I listen to taylor swift playlists on youtube.

- my first editing read through is for what i call "the big stuff," which means asking questions like: are the actions in these scenes contributing to the plot? what about these scenes contribute to the questions/themes you want to explore? where are we with character development? is it consistent? is it in character? where am i telling/ explaining instead of showing? Where are the transitions working/ not working between scenes or paragraphs?

- my first round of editing is a lot of reading/ making comments. not a lot of actual problem solving

- i keep an ongoing "notes" section in a separate document to keep track of themes/ideas/motifs that I need to carry through the entire story.

- i also keep a list of quotes to help track a specific thread of character development that I'm working on (in this case-- it's Luca figuring out how to express what he wants to others/ to himself rather than shying away from it)

- apparently i leave a comment per every 100 words. this is more than what's strictly necessary

- i also tend to comment more (and leave myself compliments of lines i like) when I dont have a beta, which I think makes sense. I need to use a more critical eye while editing

- but pointing out lines i like/ that im proud of make me feel good while editing

- i need to use a timer while editing or else i'll get distracted. (i'll get distracted anyway)

#long post #my writing #writing talk

[moviestorian]

Im glad the asks helped! I have anxiety and depression and can understand what youre going through. My ask today is what are your thoughts on Bo Rhap as a movie?

Thanks! :) I’m above all extremely happy to see people on this site being so kind and supportive in time of need, it’s a human quality that will never get enough praise! I’m also really sorry to hear about your problems. :( I send you lots of love, I can imagine how difficult it must be for you, but I’m sure you're strong and coping❤️

As for your actual question - that’s some truly excellent and interesting timing, considering that I rewatched BoRhap (with @incblackbird) literally three days ago. :P It was already my third rewatch, and while I enjoyed the movie overall, I liked it quite significantly less than upon the last time I saw it. Of course, there’s been gazillion discourses about BoRhap, whether it’s genius, extremely evil, etc., but since it’s such a broad topic (and I think some of my opinions could potentially outrage certain parts of the fandom), this time I’m going to stick to purely cinematic terms.

Needless to say, the soundtrack is excellent - with music such as Queen’s you don’t really have to do much, but they made a good choice of songs, alternating between their best known hits (We Will Rock You, Somebody to Love, Bohemian Rhapsody) and songs to fit the narrative (Doing All Right, Now I’m Here, Who Wants to Live Forever, Love of my Life). It’s practically impossible to leave the screening of BoRhap without at least one Queen song stuck in your head.

The cast was overall very good, too. My personal favourites in terms of acting were Gwilym Lee (who I liked even more than Rami), Rami Malek, Lucy Boynton and Allen Leech - I think they did a great job with their roles as they were written (whether their characters were well written or not is a subject for a whole another discussion). All the side characters were well acted, too (Mike Myers, Meneka Das and Aaron McCusker, for instance, I found particularly memorable), but I must admit I wasn’t a big fan of Joe Mazzello and Ben Hardy, but even they weren’t bad. So, acting is definitely one of the strongest points of the film.

Moving on, I also think they did a great job when it comes to costumes (Brian lending some of his old clothing definitely helped) and make-up (except for Roger’s wigs, perhaps); the choreography and stage movement for the characters were super well done, too - and it definitely wasn’t an easy task!

Now, let’s discuss cinematography. I will talk about editing in a separate paragraph, so for now I’m gonna stick to other aspects. The composition of shots struck me as rather mediocre, nothing particularly exceptional in either good or bad way, it was pretty basic but rather correct. Of course, there were some shots I really liked, but if I were to start adding screenshots the post would become way too long. XD The colours I really liked, especially in the musical scenes - they were vivid and lovely, and they used a combination of colours that I tend to appreciate in cinema, like various shades of blue and red. Finally, the camerawork - for dialogue scenes it was correct; again, rather average with some use of handheld camera which served no particular dramatic purpose, but it wasn’t nowhere near very bad, also it’s quite a common thing in modern biopics I would say. Handheld camerawork isn’t bad in default, but my comment largely comes from my personal preferences: in most cases I don’t really like it, especially when it’s particularly shaky. Then, there are scenes in BoRhap which display excellent camerawork, namely Live Aid and We Will Rock You scenes. If most scenes were filmed like that, I would give the movie a higher rating.

Before I move to the worst (imo) cinematic aspects of the movie, let’s have a look at writing. It is probably the most divisive thing in the fandom - people seem to either adore or absolutely loathe it; my stance lies somewhere inbetween. The first time I saw the film (I’m gonna remind you that I’ve seen it four times), I had certain objections, but the script didn’t bother me all that much; I was mostly simply having fun in the cinema. With every next watching, the experience was getting gradually worse, but even now I don’t hate the movie. Yes, some of the dialogue is cheesy, trite and makes me cringe a bit - certain parts of the script definitely end on an “overly sentimental” territory, I can’t deny that. Knowing quite a lot about Freddie, Queen and their stories, I generally think they deserve a better script; some characterisation was a bit offputting and chronology was all over the place. Having said that, I understand where some of those narrative choices come from, as scripts for mainstream movies require oversimplification of events, archetypes, and patterns. And quite frankly, I don’t think BoRhap differs any drastically from most modern biopics; it’s not a masterpiece, but - in my opinion - it’s also not bad overall. Regardless the flaws of the script, the movie still managed to emotionally affect a huge, if not major, portion of viewers, entertain and move them, and honestly? I think that was pretty much the point. Btw, there were some lines that I really loved, like “Puritans in public, perverts in private”, and I still think that their decision to cut from Live Aid performance to Ray Foster’s grim face during We Are the Champions was the funniest shit ever. XD Would BoRhap’s script benefit from sticking to historical accuracy? I’m gonna say yes, I think so - the scenes that were the closest to actual events are definitely the strongest - but this approach would require tons of changes, including narrowing down the narrative scope and probably the characters, too. Also, a lot of people keep forgetting that this is not an arthouse, niche film and therefore resorts to narrative and cinematic choice that compromise between satisfying the fans and the newbies; it’s meant to tell a (simple) story and entertain, not educate and provoke existential and philosophical debates. Still, I think the script could have been done a bit better, because some scenes  (the tour “Now I’m Here” montage) feel a bit...random?

Finally, the infamous editing. I totally agree that it was one of the most undeserving Academy Awards that year, because some scenes were simply atrocious, with their unmotivated and overly fast cuts and unreasonably ridiculous face that doesn’t fit the dialogue scenes, and those are honestly the worst when it comes to pacing and editing. I think the editing is the worst aspect of BoRhap; but even here, I could point at some examples of pretty amazing editing (Oscar-worthy? Not necessarily, but definitely very good); again, I’m gonna bring up Live Aid and “We Will Rock You” scenes, especially the latter, because less people talk about it. I already mentioned that it has some really nice camerawork AND colours, but also the editing is actually really cool, because it’s cut to the music! Which makes me think: “what a shame!”, because if they went with different editing choices, the movie would be affected in a positive way. The way we have it, it’s either a hit or miss (sadly, mostly miss), and the badly edited scenes are pretty striking, so the ones that are done nicely are unfortunately a wasted potential.

Okay, this is already waaay too long, so I’m just gonna finish with a few general remarks. Well, despite BoRhap’s flaws, I still like and enjoy it. With every screening slightly less, but enjoy it anyway. I don’t think any amount of discourse will ever take away my positive experiences and memories from seeing it twice in cinema. It sparked my previously dormant love for Queen and united me with some people in the fandom and in real life; making this movie made Brian and Roger happy; as a result, I like this movie. It brings back a lot of positive recollections, which sometimes is more important than critical discussions. And boy, do I adore those - I’m often critical and I adore analysing stuff academically; but I think that not all daily interactions require those and depending on who’s asking and what about, I’m capable of switching between the two options. If somebody asks me in 25 years whether I remember the times of BoRhap’s release, I’ll be far less likely to say “yeah, the editing sucked and writing was cringy, I remember the discourse on tumblr and instagram” than “Yes, I remember that chilly evening in December when I had a really fun time and ended up with 10 Queen songs stuck in my head”, because the latter is the experience I want to remember.

Thank you for this ask! Hope it wasn’t overly exhausting to read, I didn’t proofread this, sorry! xx

#answered #anonymous #is this my #the film anon #? #wera talks queen #borhap #welll this ended up longer than i even expected XD #i was trying to be as objective as possible but it's possible that i sneaked some unpopular opinions in there :P #wera talks film

[danganronpedits-archived]

what’s up! hope you don’t mind if i ask for a kin matchup 👉🏻👈🏻 where to start.. i really enjoy collecting little things, like rocks, maybe a cool little toy thing i find, not really hoarding them i don’t think? i just have a little shelf of them. i ramble a lot, if you couldn’t tell, and love to talk when i’m comfortable in a situation! if i’m not comfy though, i’ll probably try and keep quiet. i say sorry a lot and feel guilty over small things that i probably shouldn’t be. ( i’ll continue)

+ AH SHIT IM SORRY HI ITS THE 👉🏻👈🏻 ANON!! danganronpa would be preferred!! so sorry! on a more positive note for my description, i’m very affectionate and try to stay positive. i also try to help a lot! i used to be a huge empath but recently it’s been more hard to do all that. i do still try and help- i use humor and helping others to cope ( and animal crossing smh ) and am also quite the simp for my friends 😔 i’ve been told i’m a more whole kazuichi smh. that’s all i think? have a great day

+  update from 👉🏻👈🏻 anon i’m really stupid and realized your post might not be directed towards me??? i’m really sorry LMAO i’m dense asf

tumblr legit ate the first paragraph of this. SO LET’S RE-ADD IT don’t worry about it at all!! the post wasn’t directed at you but i am really thankful that you added a source- plus, all of the descriptkin-ing you did was really helpful!! thank you so much for that too!!

first off, i match you with...!

kazuichi souda!

honestly... i was reading this and yes, there are tiny nuances where you’re different from him- but the best description i could give you is... a wholesome kazuichi! i think that both of you do genuinely want to help your friends and be affectionate towards them, as well as ending up simping for them a lot regardless of your attraction to them. which goes along with being very affectionate, though i feel like the two of you are both the types to try and keep boundaries in mind! especially with what you said about feeling guilty for little things, though neither of you seem like the types to really let it get you down! he would definitely use the 👉🏻👈🏻‘s the way you do, haha~.

you both are big ramblers when more comfortable, and get really hyped about the things you’re into! however, the both of you are quick to back down whenever there’s something more hostile coming your way. but i also feel like souda’s totally the type to use his mechanic skills to help others, though, and definitely cope with humour, the way that you do- and um, not to be creepy, he does seem like the type to look away from his own problems by helping others with theirs. and i’d imagine that you share that with him! plus, i do think that he tries to have empathy for others and stay positive, but can get overwhelmed by other things going on in his life- that’s another thing i think you share with him.

i also match you with...

tenko chabashira!

okay i know that tenko’s a bit of a controversial character sometimes, so if you’d like me to take her off of this list i’m more than happy to. however, i do think that you have a lot in common with her- she can definitely be chattier at times, although if she’s uncomfortable with a situation(which admittedly doesn’t happen much ingame) she tends to get quieter and more thoughtful. she would definitely keep random little stuff she finds- adhd solidarity that’s all i’m saying, and she’s definitely affectionate and positive a lot of the time!

plus, even though humor isn’t her biggest thing, she definitely tried to help others as seen in the case of himiko specifically, as well as other characters like shuichi though it’s in her own personal way. even if she’s not the best at showing it sometimes, she does want to genuinely help the people around her and can simp for the people closer to her, as you say! and i feel like you share a lot of these traits with her! oh, also, something i forgot to add, she’s very much in tune with her emotions, and i think that she has a lot of empathy, too! although it can get a bit sidetracked.

finally, i match you with...

masaru daimon!

you might have to hear me out with this one. masaru isn’t... *exactly* like you but the two of you have several similarities! at least, in my eyes. first off, the two of you definitely are the types to collect little things you’re interested in- light spoilers for another episode, but in his bedroom, his desk is rather messy and cluttered with little stuff related to his talent. while he doesn’t say sorry a lot, i think his upbringing makes him feel very guilty for a lot of his shortcomings, however he tries not to show it. this ties into another big part of his character.

both of you seem... not exactly reckless, but very chaotic and energetic! this, along with him considering himself a ‘hero’, is where i think you two really meet in terms of similarities- both of you, even if sometimes you’re not the best at showing it, are really caring when it comes to your friends and are very affectionate towards them, wanting to help them and support them at almost any cost. plus, whenever he’s more comfortable, masaru is a big talker who huffs and puffs, but whenever he’s uncomfortable he gets more... um, it’s a touchy subject. but he definitely starts talking less and curling in on himself. it’s not exactly the same as you, but there are parallels between behaviours! sorry, that sounds sort of creepy. this is a smooth segue.

-

here we go! the last handful of characters, in order of most to least similar to you(imo, of course)! in the high category, you seem similar to kaito momota! in the somewhat category, you remind me of yasuhiro hagakure and kotoko utsugi! lastly, in the not very, but rather low category, you reminded me a bit of himiko yumeno and sayaka maizono!

wow! that was a bit of a doozy to write, as the tags essay might suggest lol. it’s... kind of hard to associate that much detail with just one character... that’s why this post is really long, as a lot of the kin matchup posts are- i do have these separately tagged, so maybe it’s not too bad? though i can make a special tag for these if you all would like! but anyways, i hope this was helpful, anon! if you’d like anything changed, please let me know, and remember that you know best !!

-mod tsu, who’s... probably gonna post the next matchup tomorrow. sorry! happy pride, everyone!

#honestly yall should see the draft for this post #i like made bullet point lists. i like psychoanalysed this person in the drafts. #cause as much as i like more detail i also start saying 'well... they're MOSTLY like this character BUT THIS PART IS DIFFERENT' ajsdjajd #literally went on the wiki and found like 6 other characters that were like this anon like half of the way #and then fell short the other half #and especially because like #'more wholesome kazuichi' is exactly how id describe this person #but ingame the closest thing to a more wholesome kazuichi is tenko #but that's *not what i'm looking for* #..sorry for the tags essay. #kin matchup #anonnie #i was just so confused and feral in the drafts #make 6 into 8 LOL #tenko mention #<for blacklist! #ask #request finished #anon

[write-it-motherfuckers]

first off, i'd like you to know that you update waaaay more than i do on any of my blogs, so i think you taking a small break for a DAY (i literally haven't written anything in months) is okay. take care of yourself sweetpea, and you can't control technical problems. also you have such an active imagination and you dish out so many prompts everyday!! like, i'm envious, do you not have to edit😂? if i write something i'll have to re-write 25 times before im alright with releasing it to the public

Thank you Darling one, I am trying to learn to give myself more time to breathe, as the longer I carry on so busily, the more likely I am to burn out big time. Learning to pace myself and take breaks is still hard but I’m aware and trying and that’s whats important.

Ahaha thank you, I do have an incredibly overactive imagination, though coming up with new things can be difficult at times, and I often need a kick start. 

I actually tend to edit as I go, otherwise I find myself getting stuck after a few paragraphs. Usually if I get stuck, then going back a paragraph or two and rereading them, helps me find the thing that’s tripping me up, so that I can fix it and carry on. 

That being said, Sometimes I keep on writing even if I know what I just wrote doesn’t sound right or make much sense, because at least there’s flow going. It’s only once I’ve either, finished what I’m writing, or the flow is disturbed, that I go back and try to read it and fix it again.

Much like when you’re reading a book and find yourself imagining what might come next, writing can be much the same. Sometimes you just need to give it a quick reread and see where it looks like it was heading, so that you can continue.

Sometimes what I write doesn’t feel quite complete, but often those are the days when I’m feeling stressed or I’ve run out of time, and they usually don’t end up being as bad as I thought they were, once I read them later on after some sleep. I also have horrible grammar as is likely incredibly obvious, but still there are little things that I’ll pick up as I go or after rereading what I wrote.

Another thing I do, is if no more mistakes are jumping out at me, or something is wrong with the finished result but I can’t figure out what, I’ll go and write something else, or do something else. Whether that’s the second prompt, a short drabble fic, or just getting up and pacing while listening to music for a while, by the time I sit back down and reread everything slowly (I’m a speed reader and that causes issues often) then I can usually find what’s tripping me up.

In the end, whilst they aren’t the much polished creations at times, they are at least readable and understandable, and that’s what I’m most concerned with. If I ever choose to make any of them into a full on novel, then obviously more thought attention would be put into those things, and I would likely look into finding an editor/beta reader.

That’s way more than what you asked for, but apparently I’m in the mood to ramble tonight (this morning? eh)

Thank you again for being so sweet Darling one, and don’t let the need for perfection stop you from sharing your creations. Sometimes you’ve just gotta get it out there and fix things up later if it’s necessary. 

#write-it-motherfuckers #mod speaks #ask #asks #askbox #ask box #inbox #answer #answers #reply #response #advice #unsolicited advice #oops

[twocubes]

So, for some reason Im reading Graeber’s The Utopia of Rules and he’s talking about, like, how structural violence (well, more generally, power differentials) have a tendency to lead to situations where the subjugated are very much capable of imagining how the subjugators think (since they, yknow, have to), while the subjugators basically have no idea how the subjugated think (since they, yknow, have no need to (this also tends to result in situations where subjugators think of the subjugated as having some weird magical source of knowledge, see: magical n■■■oes, “women’s intuition”, mystical natives, magical omniscient gay best friends, the “out of the mouth of babes” trope, computers doing stuff “magically”...))

and his point is, eventually, how bureaucracies (in his view) exist to take these power-differential-induced imaginative lazinesses and just, spread them into an entire system; like, the bureaucracy is there ultimately because there is a... thing of systematic violence there and thus those with power aren’t really in a position where they would be capable of understanding how their subjects think and thus, bureaucracies are necessitated, since they operate very much in a context where you make essentially no assumptions about how the other people you’re interacting with actually think, I guess?

(and I guess if follows that my objection to his objection to bureaucracy is that, well, at sufficiently large scales, ignorance of how people think is kind of, inevitable. Like, you’re an anthropologist, David; you study this stuff. that means that it’s stuff that not everyone gets to know. Only using modes of organizing where everyone involved has enough information on everyone else involved to imagine how they think has some serious scalability issues that bureaucracy should theoretically be more capable of avoiding. clearly we need some kind of hybrid form or something...)

anyways this doesn’t matter; i wanted to... work out my thoughts on the following chunk that I found really interesting, where he talks about the history of the concept of “imagination”

One of the reasons it is difficult to see all this is because the word “imagination” can mean so many different things. In most modern definitions imagination is counterposed to reality; “imaginary” things are first and foremost things that aren’t really there. This can cause a great deal of confusion when we speak of imagination in the abstract, because it makes it seem like imagination has much more do with Spenser’s Faerie Queene than with a group of waitresses trying to figure out how to placate the couple at Table 7 before the boss shows up.

Still, this way of thinking about imagination is relatively new, and continues to coexist with much older ones. In the common Ancient and Medieval conception, for example, what we now call “the imagination” was not seen as opposed to reality per se, but as a kind of middle ground, a zone of passage connecting material reality and the rational soul. This was especially true for those who saw Reason as essentially an aspect of God, who felt that thought therefore partook in a divinity which in no way partook of—indeed, was absolutely alien to—material reality. (This became the dominant position in the Christian Middle Ages.) How, then, was it possible for the rational mind to receive sense impressions from nature?

The solution was to propose an intermediary substance, made out of the same material as the stars, the “pneuma,” a kind of circulatory system through which perceptions of the material world could pass, becoming emotionally charged in the process and mixing with all sorts of phantasms, before the rational mind could grasp their significance. Intentions and desires moved in the opposite direction, circulating through the imagination before they could be realized in the world. It’s only after Descartes, really, that the word “imaginary” came to mean, specifically, anything that is not real: imaginary creatures, imaginary places (Narnia, planets in faraway galaxies, the Kingdom of Prester John), imaginary friends. By this definition, a “political ontology of the imagination” could only be a contradiction in terms. The imagination cannot be the basis of reality. It is by definition that which we can think, but which has no reality.

I’ll refer to this latter as “the transcendent notion of the imagination” since it seems to take as its model novels or other works of fiction that create imaginary worlds that presumably remain the same no matter how many times one reads them. Imaginary creatures—elves or unicorns or TV cops—are not affected by the real world. They cannot be, since they don’t exist. In contrast, the kind of imagination I have been developing in this essay is much closer to the old, immanent, conception. Critically, it is in no sense static and free-floating, but entirely caught up in projects of action that aim to have real effects on the material world, and as such, always changing and adapting. This is equally true whether one is crafting a knife or a piece of jewelry, or trying to make sure one doesn’t hurt a friend’s feelings.

So,

Graeber here makes this weird shift in the first paragraph, where he starts out contrasting “imagination” and “reality” and then later just keeps jumping between that and contrasting “imagination” and “reason”, right?

Which is weird, because... well, imagination and reason aren’t really contradictory, at least to me. Maybe it’s just the... dealing with math all the time that makes it obvious, but, like, that’s what math is. Imagining weird concepts and then developing them in this purely rational manner. Think about, idk, any of the weird math concepts people love to use in fiction. higher-dimensional space? tesseracts? fractals I guess? I think those are pop...

The point is... I tend to think of reason as being twinned with intuition. Like, reason is there to take statementy structures and check “does this make sense?” while intuition is there to just come up with stuff out of nowhere, after being carefully trained on a large corpus of examples.

They operate together, yknow? Each needing the other to even really... make any kind of sense.

So, ok, if that’s what those are... what are imagination and reality?

I guess, in my head, the way it works is,

Imagination is this canvas in your head. You can draw on it freely, but its primary usage is that you dump everything that you know about reality onto it.

In other words I don’t make any... fundamental distinction between those bits of the imagination that represent real things and those that don’t.

Like, if I describe to you a 14-story tall concrete apartment tower completely surrounded by 2-story tall quaint buildings with tiled roofs and it’s an eyesore to everyone around it but from the inside the view is great, because there’s all these nice houses around it and it’s near a big lake and on the other side of that lake is a big mountain, if I tell you that description, does it change at all if I tell you that it’s the place I grew up in when I was in elementary school, before we got kicked out because our landlord got kicked out of their apartment? Does it move to a different location, where the real things are stored? No.

You don’t perceive reality directly, you dump it in your imagination, where you also dump stuff that’s only been described to you, and your best guesses as to how some things work, and the sound of my voice in your head as you’re reading this (if you’re still reading this) and the plot to whatever the last harry potter fanfic you read was and the crude erotic doodles of me you make when you’re bored and in that space, you reason about it. You check it for consistency, you... make hypotheses that could then be checked, and so on and so forth.

You make up stories (guesses) and sometimes they turn out to be true, and sometimes they were never intended to be true, they were just exercises.

In a sense, I understand the medieval perception of imagination as a sort of intermediate field between “reason” and “reality”; the problem is that it only works one way. Your perceptions get dumped in your imagination on the way in, but your actions, on your way out, are mediated more by, well, reflex, which is close enough to intuition to feel like sort of the same thing.

If we pretend briefly that “the soul” contains, yknow, reason, and thus necessarily in my system, also intuition, it probably also contains reflexes, and thus contains the exit back out to reality. We can imagine the soul in the middle of a fog (that is, the imagination, on which we act freely) which is itself between the soul and the entrance, where stuff comes from reality.

or something like that idk.

[tidethreads]

thoughts on the observer article

preface: long + potentially controversial

I...honestly don’t think that’s something he even wants? tabloid supremacy means that there’s actually something to talk about - whether that’s made up or not is not even the point - but people will either talk about something personal that you might not even want in the media or they will buy into a story you’re selling them and his current strategy in terms of relationships/content of his songs won’t hold forever, also there are certain topics he’s better at lying about than others

SHUT UP I LOVE YOU

YES. I feel like something people forget is just how driven and ambitious and sharp both Shawn and his team are mostly because they either can’t see what they’re doing and they refuse to believe the team would purposely throw someone under the bus or even that his ambitions (obviously) influence what he does and how he presents himself

.......we know

do we (seemingly) get more access to celebrities’ private lives these days (via social media)? yes. does that mean the world is more open and the content is somehow significantly less curated? not always. I agree that people don’t want to see a made-up person and I admire his determination to be close and authentic to his fans but at the end of the day, what the public sees is always going to be Shawn Mendes The Brand. and that’s not a bad thing! people feel so entitled to everything these days and yes it’s good that the parts we get to see are real but I just think it’s important that it’s small parts and not everything. idk where I’m going with this.

no comment except that I like that word

THE MOST IMPORTANT AND INTERESTING PART OF THIS PIECE AND HIM IN GENERAL. so. ugh I could spend ages writing about this so I hope I’m making sense condensing this into a paragraph or two. basically the issue with everything relating to him and his authenticity is that there’s a clear line between things - for him, and for the fans and those are not always the same. for Shawn it’s Shawn Mendes™ (encompassing everything directed outwards to media but also fans) | normal real-life Shawn - which I find extremely important. he has his life away from the fans and the attention and there’s things that people that don’t know him in real life will never know about. that’s Good and that’s how it should be.

the problem arises when you look at what fans think this divide is. for that you have to split Shawn Mendes™ into tabloid!Shawn and fan!Shawn. the assumption of course is that fan!Shawn is close to equivalent to normal-Shawn. so what happens is that you have this “reverse trickle-down” scale going from tabloid!Shawn | fan!Shawn | actual Shawn and depending on who you talk to they’ll give you a different definition of which line the “split” is at. 

reading this through idk if I got across what I meant without writing an actual essay but the most important thing is that “outside of all” means away from the spotlight and i love that he has that.

this is one particular angle of this topic that I don’t necessarily have thoughts I want to share about but .... this is not how someone who reads off-base comments would feel about this. I’m refraining from commenting on this too much since it’s private and delicate either way and I tend to dislike both “sides”” comments on it so all I’m saying is that I’m glad he’s aware of the support system he has.

I think it’s interesting that he’s very aware of how this particular specific group feels about the discourse - I mean obviously he’s aware but that he’s acknowledging it in this way is ....yeah. It probably means a lot that he said this. I would go so far as to say I think no one in the position he portrays himself to be in would phrase it like this - but he does, and I think you need an emotional proximity to really understand what he’s talking about. I don’t have that but this makes it seem like he does, which ... yeah. again. 

no that’s not why you criticised it and we all know it. the “career isn’t over if people think you’re not perfect” part feels like a personal call-out to me.

I cannot believe the interviewer straight-up asked him this but also I support this kind of journalism. his answer was good too but i don’t have too much to say about it.

ME WHEN I GOT TO HIS CONCERT AND EVERYONE WAS FUCKING 15

it’s very interesting how we went from “he’s aligning himself with Ed Sheeran” to John Mayer to Kings of Leon and now we’re at Coldplay. not mad about it tho.

(excuse the ugly green lines in this and the next part) first of all it’s not about depression. second of all “transformed into something close to catharsis”? MY HEART!!! yes my emotions hit me when I read that line. catharsis is really the right word and it expresses so so much. good writing.

IM CRYING. i’m so fond. “pure elation” !! “you believe he might be” !!!! 

the anxiety ->IMB and article -> last phrase structure is not lost on me even though yes I know it’s not a big intentional thing. also this sounds like sth from a fanfic and i’M HERE for it

#THERE IT IS #observer #shawn mendes #shawn

[boy-porridge-vent]

Day 1

***Trigger Warning for most of this post!*** :(

 New vent account, I just have a lot to get off my chest, not right now per-say but in general, a lot has happened and I’m not coping well.

To start off, I’ve relapsed into self harm again

Not only cutting, but nearly everything I was able to get myself to stop doing.

 * I’ve begun to cut again, it’s now to the point where it gets deeper & messier each time I have a panic attack/breakdown (whatever the difference is).

* Im scratching & biting a lot more

* Punching myself until I bruise

* Weighing myself constantly, about 3-10 times a day, it’s in secret though since the scale is kinda hidden in my basement ever since my parents took it away

* Ive begun to check calories & count them. Before this past month, Ive never done this before & now it’s almost like a nervous habit! :(

* I’ve relasped into my an*rexia urges again. I’ve been having trouble with my body image & eating since about 5th grade; not to get too personal, but my mom was & still is hard on me, always called me ugly or fat because of an early puberty that made my body change quickly in a pretty gross way. Had a lot of acne since 4th grade;;; anyways, because of all that, and finding Onision, I was obsessed with his UhOhBro channel around 5th grade & took some of his more serious videos related to starvation & self harm to mind and tried it on myself because, despite him having a stone-cold hatred for it, I was a dumb kid and didn’t listen. So yeah, 5th grade I would starve myself or eat very little; 6th grade I kinda stopped but struggled with my clothing choice/identity more; 7th grade I struggled with gender; 8th grade was when an*rexia came back, more severely than ever, but it happened in short bursts over a few months, I also started cutting but very rarely; 9th I was much more happy & settled down just a bit, really figured out who I was; 10th things weren’t exactly the best, cutting came back & began to be more frquent but not deep; 11th was the worst, I’ve now been eating very little ever since school started, first day back wasnt exactly the best & I ended up cutting again for the first time in months moments after I got home.

 A lot more has happened since then and it’s only gotten worse. I don’t know what to do anymore

I don’t mean for any of this to make anybody upset or possibly relapse/get urges themselves when reading all this, I get so sad when I see others struggling too, I always try to help any of my friends or even random people online if they post a vent. I love bein there to support & help, even help get people to come out of serious relapses! But when it comes to myself, I tend to feel no pity, like I deserve this. There’s something wrong with me in my head, this has been gong on for years, every year feels worse than before, and yet everytime Ive gone to my dad, principles, teachers, or school counselors, they never help! They tell me off, saying Im fine, I dont need a therapist because therapists are scammers, or that I just need to be more positive & get over it.

Ive been told this for years, so maybe… it’s just me who’s to blame. Im the only one who sees what’s happening because it’s not really a big deal. I just make it seem wore than it is in my head. I have friends who care & ask if Im okay, ask if they can help, but honestly they cant help. They can support & I’ll vent to them but it doesn’t fix anything, I vent but it doesn’t fix my mind or my empty stomach or my hand reaching for my same used razor. Nothing has helped and I’m worried that after a while Im going to end up killing myself, whether it’s on purpose or it happens on accident when I go too deep. I have a lot I wish to do in my life, but at the same time, with all this shit that’s happened and how my life feels as if it keeps getting worse everyday, I will admit that at this point if I DID die, I guess I wouldn’t be too upset. I am scared of what will happen after death, nobody knows what happens, but I know that I am legally an organ donor, and I do have part of my will typed up in the case that I do die suddenly one day, so I guess it isn’t too bad.

I will be honest, Ive never been exactly suicidal before, but these past 4 months I think I’ve been legitamately suicidal and ready to go whenever I have a breakdown. Everytime I relapse I think of just ending it all right then and there, but then pussy out because I think about my few friends, my followers on other social media, my pets, my plants, and other people I wish to change the lives of in the future. I want to adopt a kid someday and give them what I didn’t get, treat them as I wished to be treated, help them grow up into the person I wish I had by my side growing up. They’d be my child, I’d be their parent, but we’d also be best friends. I wanted to start my own show, my own comic, my own booth at cons, meet so many people, get married, do music, so many things

but honestly, I don’t think I’ll live much longer after my senior year of highschool. I’m planning on finishing this year out, trying to finish my senior year, graduate, then I’ll leave this Earth with a bang. Maybe literally, or maybe through some other way of suicide, I don’t know. I might even do it sometime before I graduate. Not to make people sad, not for attention and pity, but because I can’t continue on like this, and I want the people who’ve wronged me to see what they did. I want those who refused to help, even when I was in front of them screaming & begging them to get me some kind of therapy or help, to see what they caused. I want them to see that I wasn’t just some sensitive crybaby that needed to get over himself, I want them to see that mental illness can run rampant in anybody & they need to be open to helping those who really need it.

 Ive been through so much. Ive been bullied, made fun of by my own mother, neglected by her, pysically/emotionally/mentally/VERBALLY/and even sexually abused by an ex partner of mine, Ive been literally harrassed, Ive been used solely for sex by nearly every single ex of mine, Ive been manipulated/guilt tripped/gas-lighted/made to feel as if my abuse was my fault, Ive been punished by my school for being abused by my ex! Yet everyone who has ever hurt me in these ways always got away with it scott-free. Why? I have no idea. I like to say that they’re let off the hook because I don’t come to school with black eyes, broken bones, bruises, and mascara running down my face. Abuse is abuse, it doesn’t have to have visible signs. Yet, mine does. I have self harm wounds, not because I blame them for making me self harm (as one of my exes once did), but because of trauma I still deal with that stemmed from their treatment of me. I have nightmares about my ex and her treatment toward me. I get SCARED when my mom comes home. I get nervous walking into school. I hate being touhed physically because it reminds me of so many people from the past getting physical and leaving me in the dirt afterward, even when I trusted them with everything. I hate saying I love you to anybody because of how little it means when others say it to me. Many partners would send hearts & “I love you"s, then throw me out like I was garbage.

I’m so tired of it all.

But maybe it’s all my fault. Maybe Im the problem. Im too quiet. Im too much of a pacifist. I hate confrontation. I hate violence. I hate hating people. If Im hurt by someone, even being abused, I always forgive and let them back in, and I get hurt again over and over. But on the rare chance that I dont forgive, when I do hate them with every cell in me, then for some reason, I can’t get them away, I can’t get them out of my life. They’re always around as a constantly reminder of what happened and how I was used and how I will never change, I’ll never be able to stick up for myself.

 if all that is going to happen in my life involves me being used for sex, money, or compliments to make others feel higher about themselves, then I don’t want to be around anymore. But I can’t just kill myself on a whim and call it a day.

I wouldn’t exactly say this is why I self harm, my self harm isn’t a choice, it just… kind of happens. It’s an addiction; scientifically, it has been proven to have addictive tendencies, which is why it’s so hard to stop once you’ve started/relapsed. I self harm because it’s an addiction that I can’t help, and becaue of bottled up, unresolved trauma that gets worse with every new day that I keep it bottled up for.

 This isn’t going to get better. Sorry for typing out so much too. I have an issue with piling all my thoughts and how I feel into multiple huge paragraphs, so there’s much more of that to come.

Also to come, weight updates & keeping track of what I eat/how long I can go with no food whatsoever. So far I’ve gone about 1/ maybe 2??? days straight, though I stayed home today so I did have to eat dinner, which caused me to gain 1 pound. But I lost 4.5 pounds in that day of not eating, so I can lose that 1 pound pretty quickly. Plus my metabolism is very very fast, so even if I did eat a lot I’d lose all that weight in a few hours/a day or two, depending on how much I ate.

This is day 1 of my further decline.

September 01, 2019

[crafiet]

1-50 of the writers ask thingy, tell me everything :D

D:

1 : What age-group do you write?adult! ive always written characters my age or a few years older

2 : What genre do you write?sff, mostly fantasy

3 : Do you outline according to big ideas or small details?hmmm, i guess small details? when i get an idea, i get an idea for single scenes or pieces of dialogue or a certain character, so i piece together an outline from that. but i have trouble with a overarching plot lol

4 : Which do you prefer–line-editing or plot-revisions?line-editing, i love editing. revisions suck bc it takes me 10,000 yrs to come up with an idea and now i have to replace it with another??? blasphemous

5 : Do you write better with or without deadlines?ive written my whole life without deadlines except for when i tried nano last year and failed. so without i guess, but then i dont have anything to convince me to write more lmao

6 : What would be the biggest compliment you could hope to receive on your current WIP?idk probably that its someones favourite book, or to see fanart *.*

7 : How long is your current WIP?26,305 words, its a rewrite heh

8 : What author would you be most excited to be compared to?hummmmmm,,,idk when people call new fantasy books “the next game of thrones” it sounds so fake lol but idk who my favourite author is...

9 : What do you struggle most with as a writer?writing

10 : Do you brain-storm story ideas alone or with others?mostly alone but YOU, ASH, help sometimes. its good to get an objective ear

11 : Do you base your characters off of real people?nah lol, im not good at characters

12 : Is your writing space clean or cluttered?clean

13 : Do you write character-driven or plot-driven stories?plot-driven. my writing is extremely fast paced, and i dont tend to like reading character-driven works

14 : Do you have a favorite writing-related quote?ive answered this in previous ask. the 'drunk on writing’ one by ray bradbury

15 : If you transport your original characters into another author’s world, which world would you choose?everyone else’s worlds are so harsh lol maybe id put them in atla so they can fuck around w bending

16 : Would your story work better as a movie or tv show? Why?miniseries ﾟ*｡(･∀･)ﾟ*｡ but it would lend itself to a movie yeah

17 : Do you make soundtracks for each story?nah, lazy ass

18 : If you could assign your story one song, what would it be?unbecoming by starset

19 : Would you rather live in your characters’ world, or have your characters come live in our world?honestly? i wanna escape capitalism and wield a sword

20 : What book would you love to see adapted for the big or small screen?zero world by jason m hough!!!! its a pretty big book i think a movie duology or a tv show would work!

21 : Do you finish most of the stories you start?no

22 : Has your own writing ever made you cry?no lol 

23 : Are you proud or anxious to show off your writing?anxious cz im bad

24 : When did you start considering yourself a writer?i meannnnnnnn do i even now thoooooo

25 : What books are must-reads in your genre?sff is so broad, read whatever tf u want

26 : What would you like to see more of in your genre?diversity, not just in race gender sexuality but in fucking plots like damn give me something w a twist

27 : Where do you get inspiration from?real life, books, movies

28 : On a scale of 1-10, how much do you stress about choosing character names?about a 2, i just search on a generator until i find one i like im not a stickler for names nd i dont usually have placeholder names or anything

29 : Do you tend to underwrite or overwrite in a first draft?chronic underwriter hence the only 20k words

30 : Does writing calm you down or stress you out?calm me down, i have no control over my own life so its good to have complete control over my oc’s lives. i dont tend to have the ‘characters run away from me’ thing, but probably bc i dont see it like that lol

31 : What trope do you actually like?ride-or-die, charas who are knowledgeable and badass from the beginning, i hate following the character learning to do something lmao im impatient

32 : Do you give your side-characters extensive backstories?depends on the side character, every character is fleshed out to an extent but i dont do a massive family tree or anything

33 : Do you flesh-out characters before you write, or let their personalities develop over time?i tend to create characters before plot so i would say i know them pretty well before starting but i do let them develop naturally within the story without forcing them into any box

34 : Describe your old writing in one word.tryhard

35 : Is it more fun to write villains or heroes?mmm both have their merits, i went through a phase where i loved villains but a warped heroes journey or a morally grey/anti-hero can be super good too

36 : Do you write with a black and white sense of morality?nah, murky

37 : What’s one piece of advice you would give to new writers?try anything. anything it doesnt matter if ur nervous or you ‘dont write in that genre’ or you dont even like that genre. its good to train yourself and go out of your comfort zone, makes u a better writer imo. also dont read this and think ‘im not writing an entire historical romance novel bc i hate it’ i mean just one shots. a paragraph or two. try out writing prompts, it really flexes ur skillsalso dont feel like everything u have to write will be published, thats what i mean by try out little paragraphs or prompts. let go of this idea that any of this work will see the light of day [unless u rly want it to] and just have fun, go wild, go crazy, go stupid

38 : What’s one piece of writing advice you try–but fail–to follow?its mostly those ones that help u have cleaner, more beautiful writing. i write really beige-like and its hard to be poetic or flowery

39 : How important is positive reinforcement to you as a writer?probably super important

40 : What would you ask your favorite author if given one question?when ur next book out

41 : Do you find it distracting to read while you’re writing a first draft?nah

42 : Do critiques motivate or discourage you?ive never really had many, so i would say discourage bc i dont have a thick skin with my writing

43 : Do you tend to write protagonists like yourself or unlike yourself?unlike myself, i like to write bold, confident characters and im not that lol escapism much

44 : How do you decide what story idea to work on?whichever interests me the most at the moment, i can jump between projects easily so i dont have a problem 

45 : Do you find it harder or easier to write when you’re stressed out?harder, i cant look at my writing if im stressed else ill absolutely hate it and might do something drastic like delete it all lol

46 : What Hogwarts house would your protagonist(s) be in?ary is slytherincyri is ravenclawash is gryffindorcaena is slytherin [i dont know how to spell the house names]

47 : Where do you see yourself as a writer in five years?still writing id hope

48 : Would you ever co-write?nah

49 : Are you a fast and rushed writer or a slow and deliberate writer?i used to be fast and rushed bc i was so impatient i just wanted to see the end product but i realised that i really love being in the world of my wips as long as possible so i draw it out and really mull everything over

50 : Would you rather be remembered for your fantastic world-building or your lifelike characters?both lol? i do love worldbuilding but i think characters make a greater impact

#writing #answered-ask #cloudybookash

[cookinguptales]

Okay, so... This post has been a long time coming. Like, long enough that I’ve gone back and forth and made many posts about this over the past week. ahaha. On one hand, I feel bad bringing up things that happened so long ago, and that almost kept me silent for good. It makes me feel grudgey and petty and like I’m abusing my fandom platform. But on the other hand, I’ve had certain things happen lately that have led me to reconsider my stance of silently blocking people who make me uncomfortable in fandom. And god, despite blacklisting and blocking this guy, he’s been showing up on my dash like crazy lately due to screenshots and whitelisting. He’s all over karabita fandom, and at a certain point, I realized that that isn’t just uncomfortable for me seeing him everywhere -- it’s also a bit worrying considering the age of many people in this fandom, who are honestly really young.

Cut for length.

Last spring, I started writing in the karabita fandom, and it led to a lot of firsts for me. I’d never really had many followers on tumblr before, and I almost never got asks before my fic for this fandom started getting popular. So I really wasn’t sure about ask/request etiquette, and I didn’t always lay down the law like I would learn to do so later. Basically, I wanted to be everyone’s friend, I wanted to answer everyone’s @messages and reblogs and asks and IMs, and I didn’t want to say no when I got requests and asks that made me uncomfortable. I also tended to answer asks I had any kind of problem with privately, which is a decision I’ve since come to regret. I learned that answering them publicly may lead to some fandom friction, but it creates a public record of someone’s weirdness towards you.

I’ve definitely gotten some weird asks over the past year. A lot of them have been anonymous, so I never really knew who to avoid. But starting last summer, one person sent me a long string of bizarre asks, and they did it logged in. president-frankenstein. I answered most of these privately bc honestly most of them made me weirded out, frustrated, or kind of creeped out. At least one I found deeply offensive. (And yes, I still have copies of all of these in my inbox.)

There was a strong element of pushing me to do things I didn’t want to do. He approached me asking me to write Totty/Chibita, a pairing I’ve never talked about publicly bc frankly, it’s a very much hated NOTP of mine. I told him this, and he was like “oh, that’s fine!” (Phew!!) And then he asked me to read his Totty/Chibita fic. (What??) And like all these beginning asks were couched in very complimentary, almost obsequious terms (which also made me kind of uncomfortable, but that’s more my own issues) so I was like. “Well, that was weird, but I guess not a big deal.”

Things took a turn for the weirder when the guy sent me a long, detailed prompt (completely unprovoked, requests weren’t open or anything) for a Pacific War AU that included, along with myriad other things, romanticization of Imperial Japanese soldiers, historically inaccurate details that would aid in that romanticization, and romanticization of (non-canon) disability, all things that make me incredibly uncomfortable bordering on offended. (As most of my followers know, I am disabled IRL, and as for the Imperial soldier thing, well, I’d be equally upset to get a request to write a Nazi soldier romanticizing fic. Protip: war crimes aren’t sexy.) I went back and forth on how to answer this weird, unasked for message, especially because I was honestly kind of seeing red about the contents of the prompt. I eventually sent back a polite but very terse message saying that the content made me very uncomfortable and I under no circumstances wanted to write it. And at that point, I basically washed my hands of it and hoped it was over and he’d stop talking to me.

He apologized. And he kept apologizing. Here’s a tip for people who are apologizing: if you apologize and the person you’re apologizing to doesn’t answer you -- but you keep sending messages until you get a reply back? You care about assuaging your own guilt more than the actual comfort of the person you’re apologizing to. And I will tell you, my comfort level dropped from “low” to “basement level”. I honestly never wanted to talk to him again, but I did eventually send him a message like, yes, I got your apology the first time, I just didn’t want to talk to you anymore.

And then the thing happened that switched me from “I do not like a person in fandom” to “holy shit this person creeps me out”. As soon as I told him I didn’t want to respond to his asks, he posted photomanip fanart for a fic of mine plus a multiple paragraph tumblr post fawning over me. There were a lot of red flags in there, and I could probably break it down point by point (and did, when I contacted several friends and showed him all his messages like “am I right to be incredibly weirded out by this guy” bc I still always doubt my gut reaction) but here are the main things that automatically alarmed me.

Publicly implying closeness that did not exist. Referring to me by real name instead of pseud, acting like he knew what I intended for my fics (he was wrong, by the way), talking about how long he’d been a reader (not that long, actually), etc. Huge, huge red flag.

Actually, continuing that second point, the assumption that he knew what was going on inside my head was presumptuous, entitled, and a little creepy. Like he straight up said that he was sure that if had made the fic longer or if I ever continued the fic, I’d definitely include this headcanon of his. (He sent me asks related to this (again, incorrect) headcanon of his later on, and I did not answer them.) Like he just took it as a given that he understood what I really meant when I said things, which is always a bit alarming when someone already doesn’t seem to understand what you’re telling them.

Tagging me in his post and talking about how much he hoped I liked it (I DID NOT) but not actually directing anything in the post towards me. Making sure I saw something but not talking to me. He was just like. Self-admittedly talking to my audience and cutting me out of the loop. He posted it in all the fandom tags. It was weird and offputting and performative. And very, VERY public.

Now, some background and further explanation about why this upset me so much. I have, in the past, been stalked online. And no, these events I’m talking about now never came anywhere near that feeling of unsafety. But guys, this is absolutely something that the guy who ended up stalking me did to me repeatedly, often enough that I finally realized that doing this is manipulative, not complimentary. Here’s the pattern: Be friendly, upset me until I no longer wanted to communicate with him, then make a public gushing announcement about how wonderful he thought I was. This part is complicated. Part of it is bound up in the whole (deeply problematic) trope of “winning a girl’s esteem back through an OTT gesture” that’s popular in movies -- and that I have grown to hate -- and some of it is linked to female socialization. Above all else, be nice. If someone compliments you, even if it makes you uncomfortable, you’re a “bitch” if you don’t acknowledge it and say thank you. When you tell a guy that you don’t want to talk to him and he responds by making a VERY PUBLIC (again, posted to all fandom tags) post full of gushing praise, it is a manipulative move designed to put you in a position where you need to respond. The guy knew I respond to everyone who makes fanworks of my stories (or, uh, at least try to -- I’ve definitely forgotten during busy periods a couple times), and the guy knew that a socially acceptable response to a post like that is public acknowledgment. It’s a way of bribing you into talking to them again (that grand OTT gesture -- whether romantic or, as in this case, platonic -- that makes any girl forgive you) and a way of putting you in a social situation where you have to talk to them again. It’s a shitty thing to do to someone.

And let’s be 100% clear about something. Putting a woman on a pedestal is just another way of dehumanizing her. There comes a time when praise becomes deeply uncomfortable rather than complimentary, and this guy saw that line and fucking pole-vaulted over it.

I went back and forth on how to respond to this. I thought about privately contacting him, which was my usual go-to response when things made me unhappy online. I thought about reblogging it with a simple message to stop contacting me, publicly for once so people would finally know how I felt about all this. (There was a point when people were actually straight up “shipping” me with my stalker (their words), so I knew the dangers of letting the illusion of closeness hang out in public where people who didn’t know our private history would see it.) In the end, I just ignored it and hoped he’d get the fucking picture.

Spoilers: he didn’t. He contacted me several more times, asking for meta and fic again. I answered one ask, out of that sickly guilty feeling I always get when I don’t respond to fandom asks and because it actually was information that I wanted to convey to my followers, and then just...stopped replying to any. Honestly, I wish I hadn’t even replied to that one ask because I fear that it encouraged him. He stopped sending me asks for a little while, but then I started getting anon asks that -- well, obviously I can’t prove anything, but the guy’s asks were always pretty easy to pick out of a crowd, so I had my suspicions. In the end, I was getting stressed out whenever I saw him in fandom (and disagreed with like...100% of his headcanons and fandom thoughts) and I didn’t want to have to worry about if he really was sending me anon messages, so I blocked him. Like the last thing I need is paranoia. I barely ever block people on tumblr, so this was a hard decision for me. But yeah, after several months of weird messages, I blocked him.

Going forward.... idk man. idek what I want. After I blocked him, he couldn’t bother me anymore, so that was good enough for rme. I blacklisted his name, which unfortunately blacklisted a lot of fanworks -- he tends to get his groupie on with other fan creators in the karabita fandom, so he sends asks to people ALL THE TIME and so a lot of fanworks have his name in the post -- and for the most part didn’t see him all that often. But then a whole bunch of things (detailed in other posts) happened in short order and between my realization that resolving my stalker situation privately allowed him to flourish in fandom and the fact that suddenly I could not fucking escape this guy, I started considering going public with my own discomfort. I don’t want anyone else to find themselves in the weird, uncomfortable situation I was in.

At the same time, though, like I said... The guy’s username is in all kinds of fan content posts. After a couple of followers approached me privately to get the story on the guy who was clearly stressing me out, they asked me if I wanted them to stop reblogging posts that contained his asks, especially ones that have screenshots of the asks and therefore can’t be blocked. And part of me really doesn’t want to see those things, but even more of me believes that to be desperately unfair towards the people who make fanworks that just happen to be associated with him. So like. Don’t do that. Please do not make any callout posts or harass anyone involved with this, either. I 100% do not condone fandom dogpiling.

I guess I’ll just tell you the same thing I told the (new) friend that I saw, to my horror, publicly praising the guy who stalked me for years as “a great friend’. You can be friends with whomever you want, but just know the guy’s done creepy shit. It’s possible that p-f is just socially awkward, like many people in fandom, and he just legit did not get that he was freaking me out. (Despite me, at a couple points, telling him I was uncomfortable.) But I’ve learned the hard way that repeatedly forgiving people who are “socially awkward” can land you in situations where you feel unsafe, and that’s never okay.

So I guess now you know?? I’ve gone over the reasons I hesitated to make this post many times in other posts, and I’ll add one more thing. I blocked p-f. Unless he logs out or someone c/ps this for him, he cannot read this, and he cannot directly defend himself. I do worry over that bc it seems unfair. But at the same time, I’ve come to the point where I’m tired of just not talking about it and privately, politely trying to get people to stop when they make me uncomfortable in fandom. Other people deserve to have fun and feel safe in fandom, but so do I! The fic that a guy wants to read, or his feelings of guilt, or his desire to smooth things over and make me like him -- none of those things take precedence over my own sense of safety and comfort while playing around in a hobby, and the fact that he prioritized those things over my clear discomfort is the biggest red flag of all.

Also, I have him blocked for a reason. I will not be looking at or responding to any reply by him, and please do not try to ferry messages between us. I will block you, too, bc I will no longer be able to trust you to respect my boundaries. (Again, that’s something I had to deal with when I finally spoke up about the guy who’d been sending me upwards of 50 messages a day on like 10 different platforms, going to places I liked IRL to find “traces of me”, trying to become friends with my friends so we’d run into each other in social environments, and publicly planning play dates for our future children -- and it tore me to bits when I lost friends that way.)

thank you if you read all this, and I hope you have a good night.

#I don't even know what to tag this...

[writinggeisha]

Chapter 3: Reader Question : Description

Hey guys, (just a heads up, for a quick summary of tips you can just skip to the end of the chapter!)

In chapter three of 'oh my gods I can't believe you're actually reading something I once wrote when seriously sleep deprived' we are going to discuss how you can make descriptions work for you. I got this nifty question right here from a guest named Celeste :

First off im kind of making a 'crack' ship of two of my OCs. My problems are like when should I stop describing them? I tend to go on and on about it. Ive already decided to leave out some characters and have a bit of a storyline. Its just I need to know when to stop.

Also, terribly sorry Celeste but seeing as how you were on guest I couldn't really reach you other than posting a new chapter in this guide. I really do hope that you'll see this eventually.

Okay, so I can hear you thinking : weren't you like, the person who told us that excessive descriptions are bad? Well yeah, I was but I was mostly talking about wardrobe (and I'm also an idiot who does very little physical description in her own work but hush). Doesn't mean you can't make it work for you. If you are a bit of description nut it can be hard to kick the habit. Instead of going cold turkey you can use the stuff you are describing to show how your characters function, something which works great when working with Original Characters. I'm going to be level with you all, usually I describe my characters as little as possible. I mean, I drop clues every once in a while but I'm all about the action and plot. This doesn't mean I can't help you however.

The first thing what you do is know what your character looks like, something which Celeste has already done. Then you decide which elements are important and how you will introduce them. Note that the how is very important here because some tropes have been done so often they get boring. The trope you'll really want to avoid when describing characters is your character describing themselves. You know what I mean, they'll be looking in the mirror and start listing of traits.

Stop.

The problem with this is that it will practically always push you in two categories of characters. The vain or the I'm actually pretty but I don't see it myself.

The problem with a vain character is fairly simple. As people we generally don't tend to like others who are too self-absorbed. If a person looks in a mirror and all they see is how perfect the arch of their lips is and how their cheekbones catch the light so beautifully, we'll roll our eyes and be like 'sure babe'. On the other side of the spectrum is the character that is actually quite pretty but they themselves don't notice it. You would think this is a personality upgrade, and in some ways it is. But seriously? This trope again? Not to mention this is also the kind of person who deflects every compliment aimed at them. This reeks of false modesty, and there is no shame in admitting someone is at least decent to look at. You'll want to aim for a middle ground, and truth be told, it's very hard to hit the sweet spot. I suggest staying away from mirrors on the whole. (not you as a person of course. I mean, I check the mirror as well to see if my hair is in place or if I managed to spill sauce over my clothes. That's what they are for. That and checking my eyebrow game. But I digress.)

Avoid the information dump. That is where you get aaaaaaall of the information about a character in one paragraph. It's age and height and weight and color preferences and food preferences and what sort of people they like, but also their clothing preference and... do you get tired from imagining having to say all of that the first time you meet someone? I probably mentioned this before but try spreading information out in the story by mixing it in with your narrative. And instead of giving exact heights, give their height relevant to other characters (though it doesn't hurt to know the exact measurements yourself, your audience just doesn't need to know).

Honestly speaking, Celeste, we never stop giving information about our characters. The point is to do it subtly. There is also a difference between describing them and characterisation (something which quite often gets confused).

When you say you can't stop describing your characters, I imagine you're talking about the clothes and their physical appearance. Which raises the question, how peculiar looking are they? Let's take a look at one of the more popular books of our time, good ol' Harry Potter (belonging to JK Rowling). This is how Harry is first described in the books.

"Harry had a thin face, knobbly knees, black hair, and bright-green eyes. He wore round glasses held together with a lot of Sellotape, " [book 1, chapter 2]

If you think that is sparse, try on Ron for size. "He was tall, thin, and gangling, with freckles, big hands and feet, and a long nose." [book 1, chapter 6] (they're not even mentioning that he's a redhead!)

And to finish up, here's Hermione.

She had a bossy sort of voice, lots of bushy brown hair, and rather large front teeth. [book 1, chapter 6]

These are the primary descriptions, something for your audience to hold on to while they are waiting for more information. During the story we get to know more about them but this is the first introduction. During a first introduction you want to give the audience what an average person would see when someone passes by on the street. When someone walks by we'll usually notice these things : color of clothing or lack of color and any distinct facial characteristics like beards or tattoos or whatever. After that, on closer inspection comes eyebrows and the like, maybe shoes. And only after that comes the really detailed stuff, like a weird ring or an odd button on their coat. Their conversation partner might only notice those things while they're having a cup of coffee two hours later. Which is good, because those details also signify new things about the other character. That punk rock fan might be wearing a Hello Kitty wrist watch, but you only see it from a certain angle. The serious looking secretary actually has multiple ear piercings, but the way she wears her hair makes it so you can only see it when it's in an updo.

What you do want to do is making sure you're giving the information at an appropriate time. When two people are discussing politics it doesn't make much sense for the conversation partner to suddenly compliment someone on their shoes (thanks, they're new!), but they will notice when someone else is wearing a pride badge or something like that (omg I just said something insulting and now I probably pissed them off). When two teens are talking they're most likely to notice things that signify common interests (I totally love that band and you're wearing their t-shirt?).

When your characters have known each other for a longer time, they'll notice other things about each other. A character can comment on a difference in looks or the lack of difference (this is the first time I've ever seen you wear an orange shirt! Why are you wearing cargo pants in this weather? You're wearing that Puka shirt again?) . When they're observing the other character they might think stuff like 'I wish my hair was so curly! or If there's one guy who manages to make unwashed shirts look cool it's him'.

You know what a really cool trick is? Characterisation through description.

By now you know your characters. I mean, like really know them. A is pretty uptight and prissy while B never gets enough sleep but does know how to cook really well. Just like how you can tell a lot about people by how they dress (or at least you think you can) you can do the same for characters. The uptight character might have a preference for fancy sweaters and there's hardly ever a crinkle in them, which shows others that she takes good care of them. Character B is often seen with a mug of coffee and food stains on his pants because he always forgets to put on an apron. The secretary has fiery red nails, which could be an indicator of her personality. The girl who wears her hair in a messy bun might either be a real fashionista (have you ever tried it? I fail every time T.T) or she's always in a hurry because she's a chronic oversleeper, meaning she doesn't have the time for anything fancy. The boy with the bag full of books obviously likes reading while the bandaids on his fingers indicate he's a bit of a klutz. The jock who's an ace at basketball is never seen without a lollipop, indicating quite the sweet tooth. Her girlfriend on the other hand is usually seen with remnants of flour in her hair because she bakes cookies every day.

What I'm trying to say is, you can keep adding description to your characters. But don't dump all the info on your readers in one go, and don't mention things that wouldn't make sense in the context. If you feel like taking it to the next level you can add details to hint at character traits that aren't mentioned straight out.

Quick cheat sheet :

Information dumps = big no no Character describing themselves should be avoided if possible Character description and details vary by conversation partners and situation. Different people notice different things Use details to hint at character traits (bandaids could mean klutzy, but also just good at sports or they often defend friends from bullies)

If there's any other questions you may have, or if you'd like a reference excerpt, just ask ^^ I'm happy if this helps even one person.

Also, remember that this is just my own way of doing things. Some of it may not work for you, and that's okay. Writers all grow in different ways and at different paces. Only you can write like you were meant to do.

#advice #tools #links

[nereomata]

Designing a Page's Content Flow to Maximize SEO Opportunity - Whiteboard Friday

Posted by randfish

Controlling and improving the flow of your on-site content can actually help your SEO. What's the best way to capitalize on the opportunity present in your page design? Rand covers the questions you need to ask (and answer) and the goals you should strive for in today's Whiteboard Friday.

Click on the whiteboard image above to open a high-resolution version in a new tab!

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Video Transcription

Howdy, Moz fans, and welcome to another edition of Whiteboard Friday. This week we're going to chat about a designing a page's content flow to help with your SEO. Now, unfortunately, somehow in the world of SEO tactics, this one has gotten left by the wayside. I think a lot of people in the SEO world are investing in things like content and solving searchers' problems and getting to the bottom of searcher intent. But unfortunately, the page design and the flow of the elements, the UI elements, the content elements that sit in a page is discarded or left aside. That's unfortunate because it can actually make a huge difference to your SEO.

Q: What needs to go on this page, in what order, with what placement?

So if we're asking ourselves like, "Well, what's the question here?" Well, it's what needs to go on this page. I'm trying to rank for "faster home Wi-Fi." Right now, Lifehacker and a bunch of other people are ranking in these results. It gets a ton of searches. I can drive a lot of revenue for my business if I can rank there. But what needs to go on this page in what order with what placement in order for me to perform the best that I possibly can? It turns out that sometimes great content gets buried in a poor page design and poor page flow. But if we want to answer this question, we actually have to ask some other ones. We need answers to at least these three:

A. What is the searcher in this case trying to accomplish?

When they enter "faster home Wi-Fi," what's the task that they want to get done?

B. Are there multiple intents behind this query, and which ones are most popular?

What's the popularity of those intents in what order? We need to know that so that we can design our flow around the most common ones first and the secondary and tertiary ones next.

C. What's the business goal of ranking? What are we trying to accomplish?

That's always going to have to be balanced out with what is the searcher trying to accomplish. Otherwise, in a lot of cases, there's no point in ranking at all. If we can't get our goals met, we should just rank for something else where we can.

Let's assume we've got some answers:

Let's assume that, in this case, we have some good answers to these questions so we can proceed. So pretty simple. If I search for "faster home Wi-Fi," what I want is usually it's going to be...

A. Faster download speed at home.

That's what the searcher is trying to accomplish. But there are multiple intents behind this. Sometimes the searcher is looking to do that..

B1. With their current ISP and their current equipment.

They want to know things they can optimize that don't cause them to spend money. Can they place their router in different places? Can they change out a cable? Do they need to put it in a different room? Do they need to move their computer? Is the problem something else that's interfering with their Wi-Fi in their home that they need to turn off? Those kinds of issues.

B2. With a new ISP.

Or can they get a new ISP? They might be looking for an ISP that can provide them with faster home internet in their area, and they want to know what's available, which is a very different intent than the first one.

B3. With current ISP but new equipment.

maybe they want to keep their ISP, but they are willing to upgrade to new equipment. So they're looking for what's the equipment that I could buy that would make the current ISP I have, which in many cases in the United States, sadly, there's only one ISP that can provide you with service in a lot of areas. So they can't change ISP, but they can change out their equipment.

C. Affiliate revenue with product referrals.

Let's assume that (C) is we know that what we're trying to accomplish is affiliate revenue from product referrals. So our business is basically we're going to send people to new routers or the Google Mesh Network home device, and we get affiliate revenue by passing folks off to those products and recommending them.

Now we can design a content flow.

Okay, fair enough. We now have enough to be able to take care of this design flow. The design flow can involve lots of things. There are a lot of things that could live on a page, everything from navigation to headline to the lead-in copy or the header image or body content, graphics, reference links, the footer, a sidebar potentially.

The elements that go in here are not actually what we're talking about today. We can have that conversation too. I want a headline that's going to tell people that I serve all of these different intents. I want to have a lead-in that has a potential to be the featured snippet in there. I want a header image that can rank in image results and be in the featured snippet panel. I'm going to want body content that serves all of these in the order that's most popular. I want graphics and visuals that suggest to people that I've done my research and I can provably show that the results that you get with this different equipment or this different ISP will be relevant to them.

But really, what we're talking about here is the flow that matters. The content itself, the problem is that it gets buried. What I see many times is folks will take a powerful visual or a powerful piece of content that's solving the searcher's query and they'll put it in a place on the page where it's hard to access or hard to find. So even though they've actually got great content, it is buried by the page's design.

5 big goals that matter.

The goals that matter here and the ones that you should be optimizing for when you're thinking about the design of this flow are:

1. How do I solve the searcher's task quickly and enjoyably?

So that's about user experience as well as the UI. I know that, for many people, they are going to want to see and, in fact, the result that's ranking up here on the top is Lifehacker's top 10 list for how to get your home Wi-Fi faster. They include things like upgrading your ISP, and here's a tool to see what's available in your area. They include maybe you need a better router, and here are the best ones. Maybe you need a different network or something that expands your network in your home, and here's a link out to those. So they're serving that purpose up front, up top.

2. Serve these multiple intents in the order of demand.

So if we can intuit that most people want to stick with their ISP, but are willing to change equipment, we can serve this one first (B3). We can serve this one second (B1), and we can serve the change out my ISP third (B2), which is actually the ideal fit in this scenario for us. That helps us

3. Optimize for the business goal without sacrificing one and two.

I would urge you to design generally with the searcher in mind and if you can fit in the business goal, that is ideal. Otherwise, what tends to happen is the business goal comes first, the searcher comes second, and you come tenth in the results.

4. If possible, try to claim the featured snippet and the visual image that go up there.

That means using the lead-in up at the top. It's usually the first paragraph or the first few lines of text in an ordered or unordered list, along with a header image or visual in order to capture that featured snippet. That's very powerful for search results that are still showing it.

5. Limit our bounce back to the SERP as much as possible.

In many cases, this means limiting some of the UI or design flow elements that hamper people from solving their problems or that annoy or dissuade them. So, for example, advertising that pops up or overlays that come up before I've gotten two-thirds of the way down the page really tend to hamper efforts, really tend to increase this bounce back to the SERP, the search engine call pogo-sticking and can harm your rankings dramatically. Design elements, design flows where the content that actually solves the problem is below an advertising block or below a promotional block, that also is very limiting.

So to the degree that we can control the design of our pages and optimize for that, we can actually take existing content that you might already have and improve its rankings without having to remake it, without needing new links, simply by improving the flow.

I hope we'll see lots of examples of those in the comments, and we'll see you again next week for another edition of Whiteboard Friday. Take care.

Video transcription by Speechpad.com

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from Moz Blog https://moz.com/blog/page-content-flow-to-maximize-seo via IFTTT from IM Local SEO Blog http://imlocalseo.blogspot.com/2017/12/designing-pages-content-flow-to.html via IFTTT from Blogger http://nereomata.blogspot.com/2017/12/designing-pages-content-flow-to.html via IFTTT

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