#i don't like Misha and i don't know if that's because of him or them and tbh that's a bit concerning imo

[detailtilted]

In Search of Supernatural Fans from the Early Years

Hi! I’m looking for the legends who originally recorded old Supernatural convention panels featuring Jared or Jensen, or possibly Misha. See "What I'm Looking For" below. If you know one of them, or if you're a member of a community with people who were in the fandom in those early years, I’d greatly appreciate it if you could let them know about this post. I can be reached at [email protected] or here on Tumblr.

If you aren’t familiar with my project, see the “Project Background” section below. This is not a low-effort exercise to merely repackage old videos. I’m putting many hours of work into each video to improve their watchability and accessibility. I will always credit my sources unless you wish to remain anonymous.

Even if your videos are on YouTube, I’m likely to have more success upscaling them if I can get the original video files. Thanks to the videos AgtSpooky kindly sent me, I've learned how big of a difference it can make when I have the original files to work with. That's why I’m putting more effort into finding those elusive original video takers.

The problem is that they all seem to have fallen off the face of the earth. Most of their YouTube accounts, LiveJournal accounts, and whatever other accounts I’ve dug up haven’t had any activity in 10-15 years. I’ve left a few messages on some of them, but I doubt they’ll be seen on dormant accounts. I’ve also gone down some crazy and twisted Googling paths trying to find current contact info for them, but without much success. In one case I even messaged the wrong person, who was at least kind enough to reply to the psycho asking for videos to let me know she wasn't the person I'd hoped she was. Oops!

What I’m Looking For

I’ve already finished CHICON 2007, Comic-Con 2008, and CHICON 2008, so I don’t need videos from those events, but I’d be happy to try to upscale your videos for your own collection if you have some you'd like to send me.

Actually, I could use CHICON 2008 Breakfast videos if you have any. I plan to attempt to redo that video either late this year or early next year.

I’ve been trying especially hard to reach people with original video files from either LA 2009 or Asylum 3 (2009), and I’d also be ecstatic to get some from LA 2008.

Any other old con videos you’re willing to share that have Jared or Jensen in them would be awesome. I hope to get to all the old conventions eventually. I haven’t yet defined “old”, so I don’t have a specific cutoff point.

Even if you just have audio files without video, those could be helpful too.

Length doesn't matter. Both long and short videos are welcome. Maybe I won't end up using them all, but the more options I have the better. Even if I don't put your video in my final edit, it would still be used because I always listen to every single video I can find when I'm finalizing my subtitles. Each video sounds at least a little different, and sometimes just hearing the audio in a slightly different way lets me catch a subtitle I'd missed or misheard.

Also, just to be clear, it isn’t necessarily my intent to exclude Misha. I’ve watched and enjoyed many of his convention videos and I liked Castiel for the most part, especially in the earlier seasons. I’m just not obsessed with Misha like I am with Jared and Jensen, and these videos do take quite a lot of work, so I’ve been putting my energy where my greatest interests lie. I’ll absolutely be including him when he’s in panels with Jared and/or Jensen, and in the future I may consider doing some of his solo panels.

So if you have original video files of Misha's solo panels that you’d like to send me, I’d be happy to add them to my stockpile for future possible use. If your videos turn out to be mostly complete, and if they upscale easily, then I might go ahead and do his panel at the same time I do the other panels from the same convention. If they'll take more effort to work with, I’ll probably skip them for now, but I may come back and tackle them if/when I run out of old Jared and Jensen videos to work with.

For any con videos you send me, regardless of whether I use them or not, I’d be happy to try to upscale them and send them back to you for your collection. I can’t always get things to upscale, so I can’t promise success, but I’ll definitely try.

Project Background - Enhanced Edition Con Videos

You can find my videos on my YouTube channel. (If you're already familiar with my project, skip to the next section -- there's nothing new to see here.)

I started this project in December 2023 to enhance old convention videos. My goal is to make them easier on the eyes and more accessible to both new and old fans from around the world. The videos on YouTube from that time can be difficult both to watch and to understand due to a combination of the older technology used to record them, the difficult recording conditions the fans were working with, and the lack of subtitles that make any sense.

I’m enhancing the videos as follows:

Visual Improvements: I’m upscaling the videos if possible, making color corrections if needed, and adding some slight stabilization to reduce the jitteriness. The end result is far from perfect because there’s only so much that current technology can do, but it's noticeably improved if you compare it to the originals.

Subtitles: I’m adding good, color-coded, English subtitles that can be turned on or off through YouTube’s CC button. The color-coding makes it more clear who's saying what when multiple people are speaking, and YouTube can auto-translate them into other languages to improve the accessibility.

Multiple Sources: If one video has gaps in it, then I'll try to find another that I can edit in to fill those gaps so the end result is as complete as possible. If I have more than one source that captured the same portion of the event, then I'll cut to whichever video I think had the best view of the action. In a few cases I’ve added a split screen with two different videos showing simultaneously so we can see action that's taking place in two separate areas. For example, when Jared and Jensen are on opposite sides of the stage. (There were also the infernal talking head bubbles on my Comic-Con 2008 video which nearly made me throw in the towel, but taught me a lot. 😅)

Extra Content for Context: These older videos don’t take up the full width of a modern video frame, so I’ve taken advantage of the extra space to display some still images with text to add extra context for many of the things they discuss. Some things are a lot funnier, or at least a lot more relevant, when you know exactly what they’re talking about. I clarify Supernatural episode references and pop culture references among other things. Sometimes I’ve also inserted short video clips, usually just a few seconds’ worth, if I thought it would add worthwhile clarity or entertainment to the topic at hand.

Current Project Status

If anyone has been wondering how I’m doing on my current video and what’s next… I’m almost done with the last video from CHICON 2008, which was Jensen’s solo panel. I should be ready to publish it on YouTube this Friday, May 24. I plan to use the same schedule as last time and put the Tumblr post up the following Tuesday when it’s a little more likely to be noticed here.

The next sequential conventions are LA 2009 and Asylum 2009, but I haven’t had much success in my attempts to upscale the available videos. If I were to work with what I have now, I know I could turn out something better than what’s on YouTube today, but the end result wouldn’t be nearly as good as what I might be able to achieve if I can get some original videos to work with. So I think it’s more logical to skip over these conventions for now and give it some time to see if I get any responses, in hope of a better end result.

I do intend to come back to the skipped conventions eventually, even if nobody sends me anything. Once I run out of conventions for which I can upscale the videos, if I still don't have anything better to work with for the ones I skipped, I’ll just do the best I can with what’s available. Even if I can't upscale, I can still do color corrections and stabilization, plus the subtitles and extra content. Some of these panels are split up into a bunch of very short videos, so it would also add value if I can combine them into something more sequential and cohesive. (I found 130 videos from the Jared and/or Jensen panels at LA 2009, and most of them were under 2 minutes long. 🤣) I don’t know if there’s enough footage to cover the entire panels seamlessly, but I’m itching to get my hands on that jigsaw puzzle of videos to try to make sense out of them.

So… the next videos I intend to work on will be from Vancouver 2009. This is one of the conventions that AgtSpooky attended and sent me videos for and they upscaled very well. Her breakfast video had already found its way onto YouTube, but wasn't properly credited. Her main panel videos aren't on YouTube as far as I could find, so that version may be new to newer fans. I'm only just starting to play around with upscaling the other sources out there, but my first attempt at the other main Breakfast source came out well. Both breakfast videos were taken from extreme opposite angles, so that should provide some useful editing opportunities. I’d still love to get more videos of this event if anyone has them.

If you made it this far, I am in awe. Sorry for putting this wall of text on your screen! 😅

#jared padalecki #jensen ackles #misha collins #supernatural #spnfamily #spn family #spn #spnfandom #j2 #jared and jensen #jensen and jared #enhanced edition con video development #spn con #supernatural convention

[mymarifae]

me: i finished the latest trailblaze mission in hsr so i can look at what other people are posting now! oh boy i hope it's discussions and theories about the story. i can't wait to see what everyone thought about firefly (what was going on with you sweetie...) and A Child's Dream - that segment in particular really left a profound impact on me. like who is mikhail? the voice we hear throughout is obviously misha's - did he have a twin? does mikhail have something to do with clockie? and from what we heard and saw, misha or... mikhail. encountered the embodiment of Death that lurks beneath the dreamscape. what's... the full story there...? i can't wait to see other people's perspectives it'll help me piece a more coherent theory together-

other hsr fans: *thirstposting about aventurine and/or dr. ratio, trying to cancel sparkle even though the entire point of her character is that yes she's a horrible person because it's high time we see how DANGEROUS and CRUEL the masked fools can be - no more reducing them to the silly wacky hijinks sampo pulled on jarilo; you should be scared of these guys; the game's story never wanted you to make sparkle your next skrunkly blorbo babygirl lol, heated discussions about whether dr. ratio displayed the same racism towards aventurine that sparkle did and if that makes aventurine/ratio a bad thing to ship (??????????), more thirstposts about aventurine, 500 billion generic yaois of aventurine and ratio that don't even maintain either of their characters*

me:

#HONKAI STAR RAIL IS SO GOOD AND YET NO ONE SEEMS TO WANT TO TALK ABOUT WHAT MAKES IT GOOD #I FEEL ACTUALLY INSANE #I WANT TO TALK ABOUT THE STORY!!!!! AND THE CHARACTERS AS INDIVIDUALS #NOT ABOUT HOW HOT THEY ARE OR WHO THEY CAN BE SHIPPED WITH #aventurine isn't even that sexy his eyes are the most interesting part about his design (HIS DESIGN. HIS CHARACTER IS MORE INTRIGUING) #the rest of it is just kind of ... like. yeah he's a blonde man. ok. #and my thoughts on aventio are i think ratio would betray aventurine for a single corn chip. and aventurine would do the same #i do not see a romance ever blossoming there. not even an enemies to lovers kinda thing. they're both too busy playing 5d chess for that #i want to talk about FIREFLY. I LOVED FIREFLY :( #i want to talk about acheron. and MISHA. SWEET BOY WHAT'S GOING ON? #there's so many interesting things going on rn and aventurine is not one of them. #like ok he knows some things but he's such a sleazy businessman about sharing info that idgaf i don't want to learn anything from him #he's always going to leave something out. because he needs to always have an advantage. for this reason i ignore 80% of what he says #i've gotten more context and clues out of everyone else he is nothing to me. i'll eat him.

[barisiscourtroom]

wow. way to disrespect my wishes, anon.

normally i would have answered an ask like that, it was anti Rollins but not violently hateful, but since you clearly sent it as a response to me asking people NOT to send me Rollins hate, i will not.

and going forward, i will not answer to anything anti Rollins.

i still don't ship Rollisi, i still think she's not perfect and that she has fucked up, but i also know that that's the point, no one is perfect, as these shows constantly shove down our throats.

so while i previously could entertain some wanky salt sessions where i went a bit anti Rollins, going forward it'll only make me think of hateful assholes like you. the kind that makes fandom a less fun place to be. the kind that never respects other people's wishes because you have an opinion and it's more important than anything else that you get to say it, regardless of the consequences. to take another fandom as an example: the kind of people that has made me hate Destiel to the point where i get annoyed 98% of the time i see anything Destiel, because some of the hellers are so fucking disgusting (and loud) in their hate towards anything they deem icky (ie: anything that isn't their ship. ie: Wincest and Sam, two of my favorite things).

and i'm not doing that. this blog probably wouldn't have been a great place for Rollisi shippers and Rollins fans, not the worst but not great, but after you, anon? they'll be fine here. because i refuse to indulge in your disgusting hate campaign.

#Smowkie talks #the thing about Destiel is that while i've never actually shipped them i used to LOVE Cas and i used to actually *like* Destiel #but those loud asshole hellers who are so disgusting in their hate of Wincest and Sam are too loud and too hateful #and now i just get annoyed #(and hateful too but i do my best to keep that down) #i don't like Misha and i don't know if that's because of him or them and tbh that's a bit concerning imo #sorry for the random Supernatural talk it was just a good example #OH and yeah btw if it wasn't clear i'm a Wincest shipper. i know lots of people (antis) take issue with that so if you do then... well #then now you know. and you also know where the unfollow button is. #anyway back to the original point #yeah i won't be answering more about Rollins unless it's something positive #she drove me fucking bonkers the last episode but i LOVE her #she was great too and it was so good to see her again ♥ #and it amused (and pleased) me that the episode was heavier on the Rolivia than the Rollisi x'D

[seenthisepisode]

.

#before i go i just like to say something about that poor kid from heartstopper being forced to come out to the twitter crowd #first of all this just proves a point how toxic the bird app is and i hope it doesn't die because if those people come here..... #also something something this aligns so well with these terminally online teeangers who have everything about them in their bios #and find you suspicious if you don't. constant surveillance over one another because if you don't have everything public then that means #you have something to hide. like this is a pattern and given the audience of that show are mostly teens and early 20s.... this just fits #and the fact that some of these idiots celebrated after they bullied him to come out because yay bi guy plays a bi charcater #this is insane and also disgusting please get help #there is this post going around with the tweet screen how real people can't queerbait #and i see people being like hahahha misha did queerbait tho and it was extremely funny when he had to come out as straight #and. being in this fandom for years. and the fact that he said it in a private m&g. and the fact stands called him a queer man #and the fact he backtracked only after TWO DAYS. like this thing is still very.... well it makes me uncomfortable because i still think #he might have had to backtrack for some reason. idk it just makes me feel weird because laughing at this situation feels wrong #but idk idk and like i don't have to know and i dont want to speculate. i just think both of these situations must have been horrible #but one of them is turned into a joke...... #also i know nothing about harry styles but accusing taylor swift of queerbaiting. WHERE #don't project your sexuality (or your anything) onto celebrities like they are fictional characters........ #anyway....... i had to get it out lol.

[magnificent-winged-beast]

What are these?

"Misha made a slavery joke. Taliban ones. Rape. Transphobic. Admitted entering in places illegally. Joked ab how kids don't touch him at GK. Said he felt himself become Paul from filming Karla. Joked ab being"

https://twitter.com/Stileshalenski/status/1646663985775751169?s=20

I don't know dude. Ask him?

I suppose that, as many humans that got the indecency of being young and stupid. Or not being in tune with every aspect of other people's experiences in life as if by implying some dumb joke about the awesomeness of the coliseum, and not thinking about you or other modern slaves that could take it personal. He opened his mouth, or use his fingers on the Blue bird and BAM! gave you material to be canceled years in the future. Hurray!

The other thing about touching kids, I think comes from your personal journal.

So go to your favorite nasty blog and cancel him, if it makes you happy.

I'll be here counting the days till the next arrest because drunk and violent behavior, or the news about another ambivalent tattoo the Tall one put on his body. But hey! No worries everything has an excuse for him. That Canon tattoo thing isn't what THEY make you believe, and he did it because he is pure and a very intelligent guy.

So when a tattoo of an swastika appears on his neck, you can believe that is going to be a maize. Or Because it's him we have to accept he did it for the Profound spiritual Buddhist significance.

And if you are asking accountability for my Blorbo. Why don't you explain this from yours...

#This asks... #What the hell should I know what was Misha thinking #And who didn't made an stupid joke that later regret and educate himself to not doing again #And him and me at least do it for the right reasons #To stop being jerks if the matter is sensitive or not stigmatize stupid stereotypes or wrong behavior #Not because IF THEY FIND IT ON MY TWEETER I'LL BE CANCELED #Or worse... I would not look good so everyone can Love me... A LA JARED #I'm not here to make excuses for others #But everyone has a stupid joke that if recorded and found at the right moment to expose you because NOW I DON'T LIKE YOU #A la Kelloggs... Well... Go ahead and hunt away #But include EVERYONE from yourself and the Blorbos you care for #jared paladecki #Yeah this time I'll tag him so everyone knows about this moment on his grown up adult that decided to interact with a random citizen #To make them feel bad and send his flying monkey #Too and finish the job for him

[dotthings]

Let me debunk a few more misinformation things about what Misha or Jensen say about Destiel. (Bolding some particularly relevant things I really want people to notice).

At Darklight Con Nov 8, 2020, Misha firmly said Cas's confession was about romantic feelings for Dean. (Notably, this is a European con, not CE in the US). Misinformation has sometimes been spread that Misha said Cas's confession wasn't romantic. Not true.

Misha then added that in his "interpretation" it was "unrequited" but continued on that "I'm speculating" and "I don't know what's in Dean's head. And Cas doesn't know." Misinformation has gotten around that Misha ever confirmed that Dean absolutely isn't in love with Cas back.

He then said the same things Jensen has said about supporting people's interpretations. They align on this viewpoint. (Antis don't want to listen, it's inconvenient for them).

He confirmed that Jensen was all in supporting Cas's confession scene. And that Jensen was told 3 months in advance. Since some have tried to claim it was sprung on Jensen at the last minute, a week before filming or something, and it was all an evol nefarious plot to lie to Jensen, trick him, and ambush him.

I mean, come tf on.

Jensen had three months to think about it.

And it's not only common practice on TV to have actors not know things too far in advance so their performances can be as spontaneous as possible, Jensen himself has said it's his own practice not to read ahead, so Dean's reactions can be as spontaneous as possible, and Jensen was in fact was given more than the usual amount of lead time about Cas's confession.

And was all in.

But especially interesting to me is how Jensen and Misha's comments mirror each other's take about the other's character.

Jensen and Misha have both told us they talked about Destiel.

Am I being clear enough here? They have talked about it. With each other. Often. They have an understanding among each other. (Yet antis seem to be in complete rampaging denial about this little fact).

And Jensen and Misha's takes often complement each other's, fit each other's on certain points, or even align via different styles and slightly different approaches and takes but actually boil down in essence to the same thing, plus both of them keep saying to fans...run with your interpretation.

It's like...both of them were trying to hand it to us, in any way they could manage, despite all those network shenanigans where it's not going to be acknowledge on any official SPN PR (like DVD set extras...and it seems like Misha kinda went, you know what if the network won't back press about this, I'll do it myself so he said things, here and there, to say what this was, dodging the CW sniper).

Misha's take: Cas has no idea what's in Dean's head and Cas doesn't know whether Dean is in love with him romantically the way Cas loves Dean or not. Jensen's take: in Dean's pov, because of Cas being an angel, assumption that his love is so cosmic and unfathomable no human can grasp it, so Dean has no clue as to the specific nature of those feelings for him. Mirroring!!!

(Side note...there's plenty of room here for an interpretation that Cas did know how loved he is at the moment The Empty took him. And I think that too...but that doesn't mean he knows Dean is romantically in love with him back, just that Dean loves him, period).

BTW, Jensen never said anything about how he played things wrt Dean's feelings for Cas, what he said was he never played Dean knowing Cas was in love with Dean (because Dean didn't know Cas was in love with him!!!!).

(And omfg I am so sick and tired of seeing Jensen misquoted about that, and it's never done with good faith motives, ever.)

It's about what Dean didn't know. It's about what Cas didn't know.

Which is the actual plot!! We watched!!! Dean and Cas not realizing the other one is in love with him is just so *chef's kiss* exactly miscommunication destihell. Was always part of the story, how many times did we talk about this ourselves?

Receipts below.

#Misha Collins #Destiel #Jensen Ackles

[neversetyoufree]

Since writing my last post about how Vanitas understands "salvation" as the preservation of one's self, even at the price of death, I've been thinking about how that plays into Vanitas's thoughts on resurrection. It's only two short lines, but I find the view he expresses in this scene absolutely fascinating.

Vanitas tells Misha that the dead "don't come back," and the fact that he phrases it that way stands out to me. He doesn't say that resurrection is impossible on a physical level; he implicitly concedes that maybe Misha could "bring back" something that looks and acts like Luna. He doesn't quibble about the practicalities of reanimating someone whose body turned to ashes or bring up whatever concept of the afterlife he may have.

Instead, Vanitas says that a resurrected Luna would simply be "something else that looked like her." A resurrected Luna would lack some fundamental part of whatever it was that made Luna who they were in their first life.

But what would they lack? I don't think he's implying that a resurrected Luna would lack their soul—not really. Setting aside the absence of souls as a conceptual presence in VnC, I think that would be too concrete and specific for what Vanitas is gesturing toward. Rather, he's conceiving of the Self in a somewhat ineffable way. On a metaphysical level, a version of Luna brought back from the dead simply Wouldn't Be Her, and he can't put it in more concrete terms than that.

So why does he think this way?

I think the concept of resurrection is awful enough to Vanitas that he has to reject it outright for his own stability. He cannot even slightly entertain the notion that resurrection might be possible, because that would destroy one of his main coping mechanisms.

Resurrection is nightmarish to a man that relies on death as an escape. Vanitas is suicidal, but beyond his self-hatred, his relationship to death is very particular. He's someone whose body and being has been corrupted and violated several times—through violence, through experiments, and through Luna's bite, and he's desperate to retain control of himself in the aftermath. He's desperate for control in regards to everything in his life, but especially his body and his death.

Vanitas is being slowly transformed into something inhuman, and he plans to die someday to escape that fate. The idea that after he's gone, someone could override that decision and force him back into living a life he doesn't want must be unacceptably horrific to him. He dismisses it out of hand because he has to.

Vanitas says a resurrected Luna would, on some level, not really be Luna. Whatever comes back might look like them, but it would lack some fundamental self that makes Luna "Luna." Thus, if Vanitas himself were ever "resurrected" after his death, it would be the same. Death remains an absolute escape for him, and even if someone contrives to bring back something that looks like him after he's gone, it won't be him. That life won't be his problem.

In addition to whatever beliefs Vanitas might have about death and afterlives the feasibility of resurrection, I think this is a key part of his relationship to the concept. He lives his life knowing that death waits for him as an escape valve. He needs that looming death as his salvation. Thus, faced with the concept of resurrection, his argument basically boils down to "nuh-uh." He shoots down the concept and declares that a resurrected person wouldn't be themselves in some nonspecific way, because the possibility of anything otherwise isn't something safe for him to consider.

#of course. it's not out of the question that Vanitas has actually encountered a botched resurrection before and is speaking from experience #but occam's razor and all that #or mochijun's razor: #when encountering a vanitas character trait. assume it's a trauma response until shown substantial evidence otherwise #vnc #vanitas no carte #the case study of vanitas #vanitas #vanitas my beloved #english major hours #ID in alt text #I briefly wonked up posting this but I think it's normal now

[thefabledpheasant]

I watched a video of Jensen ackles opinion on the scene in 7x17 where Dean returns Cas’ coat, and he said it was out of character for Dean to have it folded up like that. Which I thought was really interesting because I disagree completely. Dean, as a character, is extremely emotional. He feels a lot and he cares a lot and so much so, that he has to repress so much of it to get through his life.

Whether you ship Destiel or not, Dean obviously cared tremendously about Cas. During Cas’ very brief stint as Emmanuel, Dean tells him: “I used to be able to just shake this stuff off. You know, whatever it was. It might take some time, but... I always could. What Cas did... I just can't - I don't know why.”

While I do interpret this as an indication of his romantic feelings for Castiel, either way, this line is Dean stating very obviously that what happened with Castiel has been weighing very heavily on him and he thinks about it a lot. It also shows just how deeply he cared for Castiel.

The trench coat is the last thing left of this person he cares about. What’s he supposed to do with it? He wouldn’t throw it away. THAT’S out of character. I think it’d be in character for Dean to burn the coat as as a final goodbye, the traditional hunters funeral, but it’s canon that a part of Dean believed Cas would come back. The line is in the promo for the episode and Jensen & Misha even mention it being in the original script. Which means no burning the coat.

Then what is he going to do with it? He wouldn’t just throw it somewhere haphazardly. When you lose someone, you treat whatever is left of them with the love you have for the person that’s gone. That’s grief. So, OF COURSE he folded it nice and neatly. I don’t think it’s out of character at all.

When it comes to the fact that he had the coat with him in a stolen car, that’s when we definitively cross the threshold into romantic territory. I think the place the coat made the most sense, from a platonic perspective, is stored somewhere in either their cabin or Bobby’s house.

Dean had to constantly, purposefully transfer this coat from stolen car to stolen car. The coats only purpose is to remind him of Cas. It’s not like the coat actually does anything. Cas doesn’t NEED the coat, so it’s not like he kept it on him at all times because it’s important that Cas have the coat if he were to come back.

I don’t personally think it is out of character for Dean to do what he did. I think Jensen thinks it’s out of character because he viewed the whole thing as romantic and doesn’t believe Dean is in love with Cas. And while I agree the whole thing feels romantic, I don’t think the act of folding the coat neatly is inherently romantic or out of character. It’s just grief.

#supernatural #cw supernatural #dean x cas #dean winchester x castiel #deancas #castiel x dean #dean x castiel #dean winchester #castiel #destiel #spn 7x17 #born again identity #spn #spn meta #supernatural meta #The Born-Again Identity #mine

[brf-rumortrackinganon]

A certain mega-narc was noticeably absent from Victoria’s big 50th birthday bash here in London. I wonder if this was a bruise to M’s ego… Any thoughts on this? She basically has paid PR friends who are d-list actresses like herself and its pretty pathetic. I bet Meghan envisioned her life being very different than the sad reality it actually is, as she’s still a massive fraud and a failure, but now on a global scale. I don’t think she will ever get to the crème de la crème of elites that she craves to be like and obsesses over. Even Misha Nonoo married better than poor old Meg. I think Harry is well and truly stuck with her because she will never find anyone as weak or as spineless or as stupid as him. He’s not wealthy enough for her lazy good for nothing ass, but beggars can’t be choosers - and she has been a desperate grifter and beggar all her life. I truly believe this toxic marriage is her ultimate karma and it couldn’t happen to a nicer person.

The Beckhams put a stop to Meghan's PR shenanigans with their family in 2021. The cracks have been there since 2018.

Sometime in late 2017/early 2018, Meghan accused Victoria of leaking about her to the tabloids. Harry called David to confront them about it and there was a row. Supposedly they patched things up and the Beckhams were invited to the wedding. (Revealed in 2022)

Harry asked David to be an ambassador for the Sydney Invictus Games and David agreed. But when the Games were actually taking place, Harry refused to meet, see, or speak to David. It pissed David off and he soured on Harry.

Meghan asked Victoria for free clothes. Victoria declined; she doesn't give freebies. (First revealed in 2019, resurfaced again in 2023.)

Fast forward to 2021 when the Beckhams' son has gotten engaged and they're planning the wedding. Meghan issued several PR stories and a blind item about how the Beckhams are scheduling their son's wedding around the Sussexes' availability.

The 2021 PR manifestation for invites to the Beckham wedding seems to have been the final straw that broke the Beckhams' back. It's pretty plausible, IMO; there haven't been any articles, stories, or blind items about the Sussexes and Beckhams hanging out. In fact, the Beckhams have been pretty solidly aligned with the Waleses since early 2022 and appear to have cut all ties with the Sussexes.

July 2022. David and William do a mental health thing together.

December 2022. David leaves the FIFA Qatar World Cup for a whirlwind trip to Boston to present at Earthshot 2022.

May 2023. David gives King Charles a jar of honey from his bees. (Becks got into beekeeping during the pandemic. It's covered in their documentary.)

July 2023. David and Victoria throw a huge party in Miami to celebrate Messi's first game with the team. All the celebs from LA attend. No Sussexes.

April 2024. Sussexes are in Miami for polo party. No Beckhams. Not even a hint or trace of PR - in the olden days, Meghan would've at least tried to manifest a lunch or cocktails.

And of course, we can't forget David queueing for 12+ hours to pay his respects to The Queen. If that's not a sign to the rest of us that he's exclusively TeamBRF, then I don't know what is.

#ask #brf #sussexes

[eisforeidolon]

Hi! Sorry if i'm bothering you but i needed someone to talk. About what happened recently with Destiel and Misha and the fans that believed in the things he said. I am new to Supernatural fandom, but i loved the story in an instant, thanks to Sam and Dean and their unique relationship. Then i became interested in Jared and Jensen too and i think that if Sam and and Dean are the heart of Supernatural then Jared and Jensen are the soul of the show because to me no other actor could have played Sam and Dean like they did. Now, returning to what i wanted to say i am really TIRED about Destiel, some Destiel shippers and especially Misha. I know he said some stupid thing about how CW is homophobic and how Destiel would be canon if they weren't homophobic. I don't ship Destiel because sincerely i don't see romantic love between Dean and Castiel, but this doesn't make me an homophobic person. His words are said with malicious intent. He also said some thing about how Jensen is attracted to him. I find this disgusting because he says this things only for his Destiel fan, knowing that his words are lies. Also Jensen not being there can't reply to his lies. Like i sad i'm new to Supernatural but some Destiel are making the experience in the fandom a constant war. They say that if you don't ship Destiel you are homophobic , that if you don't ship Destiel you are not a true Supernatural fan and the most stupid one... They say that Supernatural is about Dean and Castiel and their love. This make me really angry because Supernatural is about Sam And Dean, how they care for each other,how they save the world again and again and how they hunt monster and ghost and other things. But to me Supernatural is the unique love story of two brother and how they did everything to protect each other. I ship Wincest, but When i say love story i mean that Sam and Dean are Platonic Soulmates in Supernatural and even the show always remind us of that. I don't understant how Misha can say this thing without facing consequences because his words feed some Destiel fan that became hateful like him and whose mission is hating people who don't think think like them. Sorry for the long post and for the horrible english but it's not my first language. Sorry if i bothered you but i needed someone to talk to because sometimes i feel like leaving the fandom because Destiel hate and their war against everyone. I hope you will always have love and kindness in your life.

You really don't need to apologize for anything.❤️ You aren't bothering me and your English is fine - maybe not perfect, but hell, neither is mine some days! Thank you for the lovely sentiment, and I wish you the same - and that you do what is best for you in regards to this sometimes dumpster fire of a fandom.

If it helps, you're absolutely not alone. I've been in this fandom for years now, and some days it's sheer stubbornness against hellers obvious attempts to browbeat and drive everyone else out that keeps me here. They didn't get to take over the show through being loud and obnoxious and they don't get to monopolize the fandom by doing the same - and they can be butthurt forever over it.

I actually didn't mind Dean and Castiel as a ship at first. I'm always interested in what people take from a canon and then create entirely outside of it, and I read quite a lot of fanfic. Even then I was baffled by shippers insisting it was a thing in the canon, though. There was a brief period where I wondered if I'd somehow missed it, because I'm not generally really looking for romance stories and there were so many posts that were so insistent? So I actually did a rewatch focused just on Dean and Castiel's interactions - and came away with the impression they weren't actually even as good of friends as I'd originally thought, let alone anything like interested in each other romantically. The more I thought about it and the more meta I ran across and actually considered the details of? The more obviously baseless it was. I mean, some of it really is just genuinely so stupid it's hilarious. Cake. Bacon. Negative space. Widower arc. Bisexual lighting and/or plaid. But even the theorizing which wasn't absurd on its face? Always looked silly in comparison to how much more obviously and easily it had meaning in relation to the main story that plainly actually existed instead.

Meanwhile, I kept seeing more and more of those posts you mention insisting anyone who didn't ship it was a homophobe and they really pissed me off. Even if Dean and Castiel were a canon couple who spent half of each episode doing couple things and saying I love you back and forth instead of the entire show revolving around Sam and Dean's crazy tangled up lives with Castiel occasionally wandering in and out of the background with some angel nonsense or whatever? Not shipping it would not make someone a homophobe. Shipping is very subjective and any individual pairing can not appeal to any particular fan for a million and one reasons that have sweet fuckall to do with how they generally feel about LGBT+ relationships. Attempting to bully people into supporting a single very specific fictional relationship by trying to make them afraid of being branded a bigot if they don't is ridiculous as hell, regardless of how canon or not it is. How absolutely fucking disrespectful to all the people who have to deal with actual homophobia versus just being butthurt they can't force two particular fictional characters to kiss. It's so goddamn juvenile I can't even.

The longer I was in fandom, the more brain dead and divorced from the show the meta claiming Dean and Castiel were going to hook up any minute got. The more annoyed I became at all the absurd stereotypes about masculinity and sexuality they would parrot as gospel truth if it could "prove" Dean was into dudes and eventually the angel. The more obviously transparent their every cry of ~*homophobia*~ was when they tried to turn every real life LGBT+ issue and every canon LGBT+ character primarily into proof and/or justification regarding D/C. They're a bunch of entitled shitheads who not only feel like they should get to dictate what SPN is despite hating basically everything it actually was, but who are perfectly fine with co-opting serious real world issues to try and do it. I have no beef with normal D/C shippers who aren't assholes to everyone and mad at the show for not bringing their fanfic to life, but I can't stand the pairing at all even in a fandom sense anymore.

The evolution of my feelings on Misha followed a similar path. I liked Castiel well enough as a supporting character and I didn't actively dislike Misha, though after I'd seen a couple of panels where his answers were flippantly irreverent or unnecessarily raunchy, I wasn't really much interested in him. Then, over time, at the same time Castiel's character was more and more blatantly just eating up screen time to give J2 time off, he started getting worse and worse about ship-baiting. He'd act like everyone behind the scenes was talking about D/C - but then they (Jensen and Bob Singer most notably) would say that was untrue. He'd slyly hint about upcoming scenes in a vague way to imply D/C and then it would be something else entirely. He'd tell shippers about things that had been pointedly removed because they could seem leading and that was not the authorial intent, but without pointing out that was exactly why they were excised. His stories would change when he got a bad reaction - he went from saying he shipped wincest to pretending he'd never heard of it, he went from claiming Jimmy was going to appear in the original Roadhouse finale to it being Castiel, etc. Then there was framing horsing around with Jared as if he was a victim and not a participant and the incredibly inappropriate objectifying sexual comments about Jensen and Dean. All of which caused the fans falling for it to loudly and angrily attack everyone but him while they kept buying his ops/books/cameos/whatever. No matter how blatantly he queerbaits them and how upset they get over it and take it out on everyone else, he does not stop. He's an ungrateful creepy narcissist who will throw literally anyone or anything under the bus if he can get a buck out of it. Who also will proclaim he doesn't want to co-opt LGBT+ causes when he's desperately trying to keep his career on life support doing exactly that in the most skeevy, backstabby way possible.

Jared and Jensen put their hearts and years of their lives into this show bringing Sam and Dean to life, episode after episode, week after week, season after season. Telling an important story about platonic and familial love that you really won't find anywhere else.

Misha and the hellers have spent years trying to co-opt that to their own ends out of gross entitlement. They deserve each other, but the show and its actual fans don't deserve to have to put up with either of them. Unfortunately, we have the fandom we have, not the one we deserve.

#destihellers #destiew #anti misha #faux social justice #long post #mention of wincest

[littlekiara96]

Why are there so many little inconsistencies about Gallagher and who he is?

[Obvious spoilers for 2.0 Penacony content undercut, you've been warned.]

This reflexion of mine started back when I first saw him during the Penacony storyline and in that one occasion you can mention him to an NPC at Dream's Edge.

Let's talk about the first time we see Gallagher, and more precisely, how the two NPCs present react to him.

(Let's call them Taylor and Bob. Taylor uses a fem 3D model, but Gallagher keeps gendering both of them as men, so I'll roll with that.)

First, Taylor does not know Gallagher at all. Nothing strange there. The Families have a lot of members, it sounds believable. For now.

Bob, on the other hand, recognises him. But he seems to do so thanks to his appearance and his "trademark" features (brown hair and grey vest) more than because he actually knew him.

He also describes Gallagher as the "officer sent by the Family". Here, "officer" could either mean a worker for the Family, which is a given, or it could be an actual rank, which sounds more probable. He does wear what looks like a badge on his left lapel.

And afterall, Gallagher trained those two, so it surely means that he's of a higher rank than them-

Wait. He's training them?

Bob recognised him, technically, yes. But Taylor couldn't even tell who he was??

And "he's been training them"???

How does one of your trainees not recognise you on sight??!

And that's not the weirdest part.

So, Gallagher was specially sent by the Family to ensure the safety of the Charmony Festival, right? So, that sounds like he's kind of a big deal, right? Like... Other Bloodhounds would know about his presence, right?

Okay. Either the guy who won't let us to the secret place is lying as a means to do his job...

Or there's something wrong about Gallagher, actually...

Alright... What do we know about him, at this point?

Bartender and security officer. That makes sense for different reasons.

Coty and Woolsey, two other Bloodhounds, also explain the extent of the Bloodhound Family's job.

Coty puts it quite literally: they will help you manage your emotions. Because doing so is also part of taking care of safety issues, because of how the Dreamscape works and can be affected by said emotions.

And Woolsey is the NPC who tells you if there are people in the Dreamscape who still need such aid in managing their emotions.

Thus, Gallagher being security staff and a bartender makes sense.

Here's the citation from his reveal on the HSR Youtube channel:

"Making a drink is a sensory skill. In dreams, creating fizzy concoctions requires adding a bit of your mood. Heavier if you're troubled, a touch sweeter if you're in high spirits... It's not just about mixing beverages. It's about mixing the experiences of life."

And funnily enough, there's this no-name bar with a no-name bartender somewhere on the commercial street and uhh...

Yeah, that House-Blend sounds like something Gallagher could make.

Hell, it perfectly fits!

But let's go back to his "downloading" description...

Local of Penacony. Very knowledgeable, but also lowkey about it.

So, Gallagher is a discreet bartender with a discreet bar, and also a security officer of a high enough rank to be sent by The Family to secure the biggest event to them, and to have trainees...

And no one knows who this guy is.

Except Misha. Who doesn't even work directly with him.

... Am I the only one getting weirded out by all of this?

Bonus:

Have a lil' crack theory of my own. Because I'm silly, aha.

Gallagher and Firefly share the same shade of green with a "starry sky" pattern. He's not the real Gallagher, and the only things they actually have in common are the "brown hair and grey vest", but of course that's enough to fool everyone Superman-style.

The Bloodhounds are looking for a silver-haired boy, or at least, that's how "Gallagher" corrected them.

Is it Sparkle in disguise? Someone else? Why are they helping Firefly? Does she know them? I don't know, this is a crack theory.

Good night and have nice dreams~

ADDENDUM, because another post made me go "Waiiiit that is ALSO very weird:

Hey, remember the Pepeshi Club and its entry rules?

Cielo confirms that anyone (not just Sparkle) can change their "Dreamscape avatar" a.k.a. appearance. And the Dreamscape Pass serves as an I.D. to check someone's true identity, even when they are using an appearance completely different form it.

So uuuuuh...

Why didn't Gallagher just check Firefly's I.D.??? Wouldn't that be the first thing to do in the Dreamscape while searching for a stowaway who could change their appearance so easily???

No need to be uncourteous about it too, like Bob and Taylor were... Just a lil' "Excuse me, milady, may I have a look at your Pass, please?"

Would that have been too much??? Gallagher, dear, care to explain yourself???

#honkai star rail #hsr gallagher #gallagher hsr #hsr theory #hsr 2.0 #penacony #hsr firefly

[ashen-sky]

The Penacony brainrot is so real, here are some thoughts:

this place is Alice in Wonderland meets Las Vegas, like I always got Vegas vibes (and a bit of early micky mouse honestly) but actually playing the story gave such Alice in Wonderland vibes. The meme? The Jabberwocky. Misha? That boy gives such white rabbit vibes. Is Black Swan the Cheshire cat? Now that i think about it, ya.

Sunday, the bird man, he may be surrounded in holy imagery but ohhhh boy are the thoughts he gives me anything but holy (this is a half joke, but i seriously can't wait to see more of him)

I DON'T THINK FIREFLY AND ROBIN ARE DEAD! There, I said it finally. This theory has been eating at me. The meme has an attack that puts your characters in a "dead" state that allows revival, and the exact same animation for that attack plays during Firefly's death. Also it doesn't make sense to kill a character before running their banner, so I think those girls are coming back.

Sam. I like Sam. And Aventurine. Aventurine's design reminds me a lot of Luka from the company that shall not be named. Honestly all of the Penacony characters bring something I adore in characters, that glitzy overconfidence of a gambler who knows his stuff, that twisted salvation, ect.

Also, I don't think people really sleep in Penacony, none of the guest rooms have beds. I think maybe Penacony natives might have a real bed, because the idea that their options are dream world or napping in weird spots seems odd, but they might not. (It did give me a fun idea for a fanfic of a character that forces themselves to nap outside of the dreamscape because they suffer from chronic nightmares and don't want to become dependent on the dreamscape)

I have two thought on Sampo, the first is what the hell was that dream and why do those damn trash cans hit so hard.

Next, everyone was sure he was a masked fool, and lo and behold they were right. However, I would like to turn your attention to Black Swan's character quest. Firstly, something is coming to Jarilo VI, something so big it is cause SAMPO to take action. Sampo, who is known for skirting AROUND conflict, is putting himself in someone else's hands (someone he explicitly states he isn't too fond of) to take action. I don't doubt he'll stay behind the scenes, he isn't the kind of person to work in the spotlight, but whatever is coming has concerned him enough to ACT. This isn't a testament to how he feels about the planet, this is a testament to the oncoming danger. EDIT TO ADD- the reason i don't say this is a testament to how much Sampo cares about the people of Jarilo VI is because of how much he trusts them to handle themselves. He cares about them yes, but by taking action he's saying he doesn't think they can handle whatever's coming on their own even with the recent reconnection with the IPC and working to recover their old technology.

All this is to say WHEN IS THE NEXT UPDATE, please, god, feed me story.

#anime devil's thoughts #honkai star rail #hsr #penacony spoilers #honkai star rail spoilers #hsr sampo #sampo koski #hsr firefly #hsr robin

[oh-my-may]

LET'S TALK HSR PENACONY 2.1 (or rather, have my impressions and thoughts on the main quest and some other stuff)

First of all, I went out of it with so many thoughts and emotions. This is not gonna be spoiler free (duh).

ACHERON IS SO FUN TO PLAY. Like, really really fun. Finally Simulated Universe is not an annoying pain anymore, and much quicker too. Thanks to a good friend of mine her relics aren't too bad either. She's already so fun to play with Black Swan, can't wait for a Kafka rerun now 💀

Aa for the story now: I FUCKING KNEW MIKHAIL WAS THE WATCHMAKER. I KNEW IT. Now to wait for them to confirm that Misha is connected to him, either as a ghost of his past self or a child or some sort. It's the only way.

It's also really refreshing to see that HSR is giving 4star characters significant roles in the story. First it was Tingyun, now it's Gallagher (and maybe Misha? I'll die on this hill).

Loved the pacing. Story was quite long and lots of gameplay but didn't feel overwhelming at all, probably because we didn't just stick to the MC the whole time. The characters split up and we didn't just follow the express crew but also Aventurine, I really loved that. It felt so dynamic and immersive.

WELT AND ACHERON INTERACTION. BRO. The way I gasped the whole time. We still don't have a canon confirmation of how Raiden Mei and Acheron or just generally HI3rd and HSR are connected but it's sp clear that Acheron is by far the closest connection yet. So sp excited to find out more about this. Raiden Mei, I'll love you in every universe.

Aventurine and Ratio are also very interesting to me. What does Ratio gain by involving himself in all of this? What does he get out of it? Anyway, their little journey through the mansion was nice. GIGANTIC RATIO. The kinda stuff my dreams are made of tbh.

Generally the whole Aventurine story got me right from the beginning. He's generally one of the most interesting characters to me (although this game has plenty of them). I gotta admit of course I was suspicious of him (as one should be of all Penacony characters) but I liked him nevertheless. This patch supported my feelings, my GOD HE xkdjjdjdjd. The way I cried. Since I played the story so late ofc I saw some spoilers/screenshots of his backstory but I never expected it to hit me this hard. Just wow. His ending, too. It's so bitter. Kinda hope we get to see him again, since he'a mot really dead, right? Just in some limbo.

His boss fight was really something. Not a lot of different patterns, but I still had to try a bunch of different teams, since you're kinda fucked even with just a single single target character in your party. Had to unbench Clara, and I gotta say, she came through for me. I might not have used the most meta team, but it worked soooo...

And just as I was glad I had managed the fight they hit you with that big cut scene, woah. AND THEN WITH THE FIREFLY SCENE? AND SUNDAY????

First of all, apparently it was common knowledge among the community since last patch that Sam was Firefly. Yeah, I gwt it bc of the leaks and stuff. But I'm just so confused as to HOW. Like HOW and WHY and just generally HUH. I can't wait for them to explain this connection (if you're reading this and you wanna spoil me with non-confirmed stuff then leave it, please, I might as well wait another 3 weeks).

And then Gallagher and Sunday... Just as I was admiring Sunday's beauty because he might legit just be one of the most gorgeous male character designs... THEY KILL HIM. When I tell ypu I was SHOOK. Mouth agape and all. Didn't know what to do. What a cliffhanger.

Now I don't have a real theory as to what I think will happen. If I remember correctly they said the main story will stretch until 2.3, right? I really wonder what else will happen, the story already seemed so huge this patch and I really wonder how it'll conclude. There's still so many questions and stories. Might add on to this post later when I have more thoughts.

Also Aventurine's banner just dropped but as of writing this I haven't pulled yet. Might add a little post later about it.

For now, have some screenshots I took during the story:

ALSO I GOT AVENTURINE. SECOND 50/50 WIN IN A ROW IN THIS GAME HAVE I FINALLY BROKEN THE CURSE. Now for the long and treacherous road of farming his trace mats and relics ... Since I never really prefarm 🥲

A pic I took in my excitement. Forgot the screenshot button exists.

#may's gaming #hsr #honkai star rail #star rail #penacony #acheron #hsr acheron #raiden mei #hi3rd #welt #welt yang #hsr welt #aventurine #hsr aventurine #dr ratio #veritas ratio #hsr veritas #gallagher #hsr gallagher #sunday #hsr sunday

[web-spinning]

merc reactions to getting a new recruit but finding out they’re only in their mid-teens ? gender neutral please-

A / N - Ay, it's here. Somehow I managed to finish this faster than I expected. Hope you like it, dear anon!

Also, half of the photos are kind of meme-y, but you know what? It works...Please tell me if it works, I am losing my mind trying to find a good quality comic cut out, but only find those.

Mercs with a recruit in their mid-teens

TW. Ask to tag.

Scout

- he's not much excited, in fact he's a bit scared you might take his place, 

- but after he finds out you're younger than him...he's so happy! 

- he will teach you so many things, 

- how to play basketball, how to get along with the older men, even how to deal with your first crush, 

- since he is barely a few years older than you, he feels like as an young adult it's his priority to make sure you know all this stuff, 

- he's got seven older brothers, all the lessons are probably from them, 

- he really feels like you're just his younger sibling, 

Soldier 

- Jane thinks it's his duty to make sure you know the rules of war, 

- he will show you how to use weapons, maybe even let you touch his own weapons, 

- " But only for a few seconds, I don't want your young, inexperienced civil hands to spoil them! ", 

- he will sit you down in the meeting room of the base, and tell you stories, 

- half of those stories aren't real, but you don't want to make him sad, so you just listen, 

- on the battlefield, he will follow you around to make sure you don't hurt yourself...or use your weapons incorrectly, 

- also..." You do know basic history of your beloved country, don't you, hippie? ", 

Pyro

- this Phoenix adores you, 

- will invite you to tea parties, 

- you will also get a plushie or two from their collection, 

- you're the only person other than Engineer who takes them seriously, that's why they like you so much, 

- their childish personality helps you cope with the fact you've been sorted out as a mercenary at such a young age, 

- always there when you're feeling down, 

Demoman 

- in all honesty, he has mixed feelings about you, 

- he can't invite you to the drinking nights with the other guys, you're just always left behind, 

- in recompense, he tries to teach you how to use the sword in the meantime, 

- you might never use that skill in the battlefield, but at least you have a thing that takes your mind off of the gravel wars, 

- when you're down, you both watch soap operas together, because he's the only one in the whole team who likes them, 

Heavy 

- Misha just avoids you, 

- at first, you think he's just a big, tough guy who dislikes teenagers to look more " deranged ", 

- but finally, one of the men, possibly Medic, explains to you why he dislikes being around you so much, 

- you remind him of his younger self and his sisters. The way he had to fight to protect them, the awful place they lived in for a while...everything comes back to him when he sees young face, 

- you try approaching him about it, but he still remains silent, 

- deep inside, on every mission he keeps a close eye on you, making sure you're safe, 

Engineer 

- Dell is now your step-dad, that's how it works, 

- he needs a few energetic bones to help him with his projects, so you will often stand around and hand him tools when he asks for them, 

- while he's working, he will tell you different stories about the other mercenaries, 

- you ask him to adjust your weapon's, because they're a bit too big for you to handle freely, 

- on warm days, he will take you out for a short walk to make sure you won't go insane, 

- he assures you that you can tell him about anything, and he will help, 

- he does in fact help, especially when it goes with your emotions, 

- he's always there to cheer you up when you're sad, or share a smile with you when you're happy, 

Medic 

- he's so happy with you! I mean, such a fresh canvas to test on, 

- every week he asks you to replace your heart with an Uber-handling one, and every week you refuse, 

- but when he's not in his mad scientist mood, he's always ready to help you with some of the downsides of growing up, 

- he's also very helpful when you're feeling insecure about your body ( all teenagers do that, right? Not only me, right? ), 

- " Oh, don't vorry, zhis vill go away. Zhe average of healthy patients your age look zhe same as you ", 

Sniper

- you never knew his first reaction, because he's rather quiet about it, 

- but after a bit, you learn that he's actually very trustworthy, and big hearted, 

- when you're down or one of the other mercenaries, you go to his camper, 

- you both play board games there, 

- he will most likely take you out fishing or camping during long weekends, 

- you like listening to him talk about his adventures from the bush, but he will leave out the gorey details out, 

- at some point, he just feels like an older, wiser, quiet brother to you, 

Spy

- he's mad. Not at you, at the Administrator for even thinking about hiring you at this age,

- he doesn't see the reason why there must be a new mercenary, so he mostly avoids you,

- until during one of the missions, you save him for getting headshoot point blank,

- he does acknowledge you a bit more after that,

- you're not allowed in his room though, it smells too much like cigarettes in there,

- maybe he seems cold on the outside, but when he sees you struggling with your work, he will always help,

- helping you however makes him remember he couldn’t see this stage of his son’s life…that makes him feel miserable. 

#team fortress 2 #tf2 #tf2 headcanons #tf2 mercs #tf2 x reader #tf2 x reader platonic #tf2 scout x reader #tf2 soldier x reader #tf2 pyro x reader #tf2 demoman x reader #tf2 heavy x reader #tf2 engineer x reader #tf2 engineer is dad #tf2 medic x reader #tf2 sniper x reader #tf2 spy x reader

[dotthings]

Let me make this even clearer. Because Jensen and Misha both deserve better.

Given that we know they talk a lot about Destiel among themselves. They have told us, repeatedly. They've shared each other's perspectives with each other. They have an understanding.

Early misunderstandings and conflicts in pov aside (and do people want to keep circle jerking as if it's still 2014? Okay then. Have at it, but time moved on and you didn't): Jensen doesn't speak over Misha. Misha doesn't speak over Jensen.

Some things Misha has said about Dean or Destiel has resulted in Jensen stans attacking him. They always have some excuse--this past weekend it was because Misha acknowledged the idea of Dean and Cas having sex.

In the past, another example, backlash came at Misha for saying Cas saw love and acceptance in Dean's eyes.

(Which...sure does seem like the pearl-clutching about Misha's CR8 comments being too ribald is fake virtue signaling doesn't it, since even a statement from Misha wide open to platonic or romantic reading, that is 100% true about Dean, and how loving he is, how loving we know Dean is, how much we know Dean is going to accept and love Cas either way, got hatred aimed at Misha as if he had said something heinous. Tells me all I need to know about certain stans).

While Jensen's "Cas is an angel therefore his love is cosmic and unknowable impossible for humans to grasp let's not define it" and "open to interpretation" middleground to appease both sides and treading carefully for reasons, on a topic that's napalm in fandom (it shouldn't be, but that's the reality), might be construed as speaking over Misha.

But here's the thing!!! It's not!! From either of them!!

It seems very obvious by now that they decided Misha would be the loud one, with Jensen holding his cape, even if he doesn't join in , and Jensen walking a diplomatic middle line, also with Misha's understanding and support in turn.

When Misha goes off boldly about Destiel? People need to kick out that hate fantasy about Jensen being disrespected and Jensen must be wanting to punch Misha and Jensen must be so mad at Misha how dare Misha out of their heads, or get to the point where they can comprehend the difference between their own feelings vs Jensen's and quit projecting.

They didn't shut each other out. They talked about Destiel. They listened to each other. Highly likely, in fact, that they helped each develop or refine their talking points.

Neither of them has been shooting off their mouth about the other's character without having spoken to each other.

I don't have any hope for fans to stop the endless fighting and concern trolling and attacking either Jensen or Misha over it, needlessly, perpetually, but when it comes to Jensen and Misha...that's a hopeful space.

Misha's bluntness vs Jensen's carefully chosen middleground words complement each other are not in fact oppositional takes--they complement each other, there's room for both. They both know it's a mutually loving relationship.

Neither is trampling on the other's pov, and any views that don't perfectly align, they've already discussed and they respect each other.

These accusations at either of them are not true, they are not fair, and they both deserve better.

And now I'm staring right at a recent thing where Misha full on absolved Jensen of an accusation that various lanes kept throwing at him, and still weaponize, including Jensen stans who claim to be defending Jensen, because they want it to be true.

The response was manufactured drama where people called Misha a liar and doubling down.

They'd rather Jensen take the fall and they'd rather call Misha a liar than believe a soulless corporation that has been caught more than once exercising queer censorship could have committed queer censorship in a TV industry where it's common knowledge that queer censorship by broadcast TV networks happen???????

Wow gee can you feel the love in this Chili's. Great going. Excellent defense strategy. You're really such a big help. With fans like these, Jensen and Misha don't need antis.

A lot of it is agenda driven, and some anxiety driven, every lane's worried about other lanes react, because spn fandom is always a pain in the neck that way. Some people hate Destiel so much they need Jensen to be their antidestiel warrior they'll throw Jensen under a bus and stan for the corporation, or they're so anxious about how Destiel gets treated they blame Jensen and forever hold against him his past foot in mouth about the ship (which was a long time ago. Please stop punishing him endlessly when he's moved on and his perspectives are respectful, yet you're still stuck back there) rather than comprehending the actual systemic factors.

Jensen and Misha are both doing what they can to make it better.

They are trying to fix it!!!

People should show them more respect!!!!

#Jensen Ackles #Misha Collins #Destiel

[artificial-transmutations]

Peace and Love

The rain that had covered the city ruins during the last few days had ended an hour ago. Still, Misha didn't feel good walking through the bombed out place. The sky was still gray and dark, always ready to unload a new shower of rain water on them.

Usually, Misha liked the rain, since it always had a cleaning aspect to it, washing away the dirt and making way for new sunshine. However, that had changed when he had been drafted and sent into this country on the whim of the president, an old man with an unhealthy appetite for neighboring countries' soil.

At the beginning, Misha believed all the lies they had been told, about how evil this countries government was and that they needed to liberate the people here. It had been quite a surprise when said people had little interest in being liberated and instead fought back with all they had.

It should have been a short war, not even a real war, that's what they said. Now, it has already been well over one year since they invaded.

Misha sighed. He knew that, secretly, many of the other soldiers thought the same way, but nobody dared to say anything.

The other man he was on patrol with, for example. His name was Sergey, and Misha knew that he had left a girlfriend at home when he was drafted for this war. Although Sergey didn't talk too much about it, Misha knew she had broken up with him by now. He had no idea how Sergey knew, since they weren't allowed to use phones, but such news didn't do much to raise the poisoned mood of the soldiers.

In that regard, Misha was lucky. The only woman he left at home was his mother, since he was "between girlfriends" currently. Truth be told, he just wasn't very good in taking to girls. Not that it mattered, anyway, because right now, he was mainly in the company of men.

There had been rumors about some of the invading soldiers seeking release with the local girls, against their will even. Misha refused to believe that, and he was pretty sure it couldn't have been anyone from his unit: Although or perhaps even because they were all real men, Misha was sure none of them would do something like that.

In other units, though, Misha wasn't quite so sure if he was being honest. There were some pretty big assholes in the army - a character trait that curiously often coincided with the firm belief in what they were doing out here.

"Do you think it will end soon? That damned war, I mean."

Misha's thoughts were interrupted by Sergey's voice. As usual, the other man sounded borderline depressed.

It made no sense to lie, so Misha shook his head. "Not until the old man dies."

Instinctively, Misha looked around. Thankfully, there wasn't anyone else here. He should not have said that! If Sergey told anyone, he would be shot!

"Hah. You're brave." Sergey said, himself looking around, before continuing in a lower voice.

"But I agree. All of that is just so... wrong."

If Sergey was testing him, he was very convincing. It did feel good to be able to speak his heart for a change, so Misha nodded.

"Yeah. What are we even doing here? I'm tired of fighting, and this whole war is not justified at all."

Sergey turned to a more secluded alley, away from potential eyes and ears that could hear their highly treacherous conversation. When he was sure that nobody could see or hear them, he stopped and lit a cigarette and regarded Misha with a long look.

"Did you ever think about just... you know... Not fighting anymore? Just going away?" he asked, carefully.

Whoa, this was dangerous talk indeed. Misha almost whispered, when he replied:

"You mean like - deserting?"

Sergey nodded. "I've been thinking about it for some time now. I just don't want to do this anymore. All this destruction and killing and violence. And all that for a cause I don't believe in. The old man is not only destroying the lives of the people here, but also the lives of his own men, our lives. And you know what? I think he doesn't even care. Someone really should stand up to him and end this, but everyone is just afraid."

Misha needed a second to digest this, but he found himself agreeing whole heartedly. "I feel you, man! But who would do that? There's a reason everyone is afraid. He'll fucking kill you or your family."

Sergey sighed. There was no denying Misha was right, it wasn't like he hadn't had that thought himself.

"I know. And, you know, I don't care how, but I just don't want to do this anymore. I wish there would just be peace, and love."

Misha nodded sincerely. "Peace and love. That sounds wonderful."

It was a strange moment between the two soldiers, both tough men and raised in a culture of masculinity. Opening their hearts like that was something neither of them were used to do. All these emotions, all these wishes should be kept inside, at all cost. That was what was expected of them both. Yet, somehow, the sincere and pure wish, uttered from the bottom of Sergey's heart touched something inside of Misha, and resonated with his own tortured soul. He couldn't prevent it: A single tear rolled down his dirty cheek.

The thing about wishes is that they are powerful. While belief is able to move mountains, hope and wishes shape our live, from the start until the very end. Once a true and pure wish like that is out in the open, it cannot be contained anymore. Given the right moment in time and the right people around us, a wish like that can take root and bloom into something magnificent. Even in the darkest places and the most tortured souls, there is magic. Most often, you can't see it and the magic we shape by our hearts truest desires is subtle and works unseen. But there are those really rare times when the spark of the wish that ignites our magic is so strong, so deeply rooted, that the magic it unleashes is not a small and unseen trickle, but a flood, a force being able to change anything and everything, in the most spectacular of ways. This was one of those moments.

Misha was surprised to feel the other man's hand on his cheek, wiping away his tear. The touch was gentle and tender and didn't really fit to the tough man wearing uniform and carrying an assault rifle. When Misha looked up, he saw Sergey smiling, perhaps for the first time in all of the months they had known each other now.

Misha wanted to say something, anything really, but he couldn't. There was a lump in his throat and his feelings were going crazy. He had never noticed, but Sergey looked good when he smiled. Not just good, Sergey looked handsome, beautiful even. As much as he wanted to, Misha couldn't stop looking at Sergey's face. He did barely notice that he too was smiling. There was an unknown feeling in his stomach, making him feel weak and strong at the same time. He felt an attraction stronger than anything he had ever felt before, and he knew Sergey was experiencing something similar. The cigarette had been dropped to the ground carelessly, as the two men moved closer to each other. Sergey’s eyes were deep brown pools that sucked Misha in - so beautiful, and yet so close.

Misha did only notice how close they had gotten when their noses touched. He backed up half a centimeter, before he saw the smile on Sergey’s mouth showing a slight hint of amusement. Then it happened, as if it was the most natural thing in the world, as if it was a law of nature rather than something Misha was told was abhorrent. Their lips found each other, warm and soft and tender.

As Misha and Sergey kissed, the world around them was in motion. The ruined and wet concrete around them changed and became more aligned to the joy in their souls, as it gave way to the new reality they created together. In this place where violence and death reigned, love and peace took hold, and their surroundings became a home, filled with life and memories.

The dirt of the conflict on their skins washed away, along with their uniforms and tools of war, until they were as naked as the day they were born. But not even their bodies stayed the same. While Sergey became somewhat more massive, with bulging muscles and a slight layering of body fat, for Misha, it was the other way around. His features became more delicate, and a lean build formed on his body. While he retained a slight bit of body hair and a hint of stubble on his chin, it was nothing compared to Sergey, whose body bloomed with a dense pelt of dark hair. A short and attractive beard formed on his chin and tickled Misha while they made out passionately. Their naked erections rubbed together, already having accepted this new reality. As Misha's hair lightened up a bit, become a dark blond spiky cut, both of them knew in their heart that it was done. They had escaped the madness, together. They were at home and at peace. And, most importantly, they were loved. Misha loved his boyfriend, Sergey, and Sergey loved him. Finally, the sky had cleared up for them, and the future was bright.

I believe I should mention again that all characters and events in my stories are purely fictional. Inspiration however can come from the strangest things. I whish everyone the peace and love they really wish for!

This story also serves as a complementary piece to Army fantasies, since I felt it ended on a slightly unpleasant note, at least for some.

#male transformation #muscle transformation #straight to gay