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#i still like it don't get me wrong it's not all bad
tgcg · 3 days
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an open fly walking
i didnt like this one but i thought id finally air it out since its been sat in my folders for months now
TG: hey karkat
CG: YEAH?
===
TG: you ever noticed you like
TG: walk weird
CG: WOW, OKAY.
CG: HAVE *YOU* EVER NOTICED THAT I DON'T GIVE A SHIT?
TG: pff
===
TG: no listen because i got my ears scoping that shit im like a scouter for dude activity
TG: ok maybe me mentioning it to you is gonna fuck up your ecosystem or something but
TG: you have the heaviest feet of the century man
CG: I DO???
TG: just thrust them straight down into the ground like youre trying to homebrew a san andreas fault
TG: viciously tamping on tectonic plates hoping for top score on the richter scale
TG: waging war against solid particles and the basic flow of gravity
TG: i could ID those footfalls out of a million i mean it
CG: SERIOUSLY?
===
TG: i mean theres nothing wrong with it but
TG: yeah
CG: I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU'RE FUCKING WITH ME RIGHT NOW.
TG: im not fucking with you striders honor
TG: when have i ever lied to anybody about anything
CG: NOT UNPACKING THAT QUESTION WITH YOU TODAY.
CG: BUT SHIT, HOLD ON. LET ME SEE.
TG: yeah take the umbrella go over there and just walk to me
CG: ON IT.
===
===
TG: see you just kinda slam em straight down dude
CG: THIS IS THE WORST DAY OF MY RIOTOUS FUCKING JOKE OF A LIFE.
TG: dont your feet ache
===
CG: MOOT POINT. THIS MIGHT SOUND INSANE BUT I'VE ACTUALLY HAD MY STRUT PODS FOR A WHILE. ANY KIND OF PAIN THIS WOULD'VE BEEN CAUSING WOULD BE TOTALLY FILTERED OUT OF MY SPONGE BY NOW AS BACKGROUND NOISE.
TG: damn i didnt think that through
TG: my shades
CG: ALRIGHT, GET BACK UNDER THE SHITTING UMBRELLA AND THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU'VE DONE TO ME.
TG: look ive fucked myself over here too i dont have shit to clean these with
TG: ugh
===
TG: guess its karma
CG: HOLY FUCK. HOW DID I NEVER NOTICE THIS BEFORE?
TG: i dunno but im gonna assume having a dad thats a literal crab monster is probably a contributing factor
TG: im guessing thats not a great role model for this kinda thing
TG: just conjecture i mean
CG: YOUR ENVY IS OVERWHELMINGLY OBVIOUS DAVE. AS A DISCLAIMER, HE WOULD'VE ABSOLUTELY KICKED YOUR ASS.
TG: yeah probably
CG: THAT'S PRETTY MUCH ALL THERE IS TO SAY ON THE MATTER.
===
TG: but see bro had me stringent on feather feets
TG: i bet i could slip across a bike horn warehouse with nary a fucking toot
CG: HAHA. ASSUMING YOU DON'T MAKE A TOTAL ASS OF YOURSELF, AS PER USUAL.
CG: IF YOU WEREN'T CONSTANTLY RUNNING YOUR GASH ABOUT EVERYTHING AND BEING AN INIMITABLE CLOWN I SERIOUSLY THINK YOU COULD BE ON PAR WITH YOUR CUSTODIAN.
CG: THAT IS A MONUMENTAL "IF".
TG: well look at it this way
TG: im basically doing you all a favor by being a dumbass
TG: never gonna get caught off guard by the bozo patrol
CG: WOW. GOOD POINT.
===
TG: also screw this can i use your shirt
TG: this stupid hoodie is just smudging my lenses up
TG: i cant see dick
CG: UH
CG: SURE, I GUESS.
TG: cool
===
TG: so yeah i could be prowling around like a goddamn verbal assassin sniping convos left and right
TG: but no ive got the decency to go bunp in the night
CG: YEAH.
CG: IT'S DEFINITELY COMPOUNDED BY THE CONSTANT INANE RAMBLINGS.
CG: BUT
CG: IT'S ACTUALLY PRETTY RELAXING, Y'KNOW? IT HAS ITS OWN RHYTHM.
TG: see yeah i sound it off and
===
TG: wait really?
CG: YEAH
CG: I DON'T KNOW
CG: FUCK. HOW DO I EXPLAIN THIS WITHOUT WANTING TO CRAM MY FROND DOWN MY PROTEIN CHUTE.
===
CG: IT'S LIKE
CG: A SALVE FOR MY AGGRAVATION SPONGE.
CG: YOUR VOICE IS THE HUMAN EQUIVALENT OF ASPIRIN.
TG: uh damn karkat hold your hoofbeasts i was talking about the rhythm thing
CG: ALRIGHT, THAT'S IT. I'M TAKING US BOTH THE FUCK OUT RIGHT NOW. YOU HAVE REACHED THE BAD END OF THIS CONVERSATION.
TG: you think thatd be heroic or just
CG: IF I WAS STILL GHOSTING AROUND THE RUINS OF SGRUB'S ARCANE FRIGGIN GAME SYSTEMS, THE COMPLETE LACK OF SHIT AFOOT NOWADAYS WOULD BORE ME TO DEATH.
CG: LIKE. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME OUR THERMAL HULL LEVELLED UP, DAVE?
TG: hah
===
TG: but uh
TG: i mean we had aspirin on earth
CG: NO, NUMBNUBS.
CG: I'M SAYING YOU ARE MY ASPIRIN.
TG: oh
CG: YEAH, TAKE THAT TO THE BANK AND SHOVE IT UP YOUR 20-KARAT ASS.
===
TG: heh
TG: well get this
TG: i will literally talk at you forever for free
TG: you got lifetime priority seating for the davealogues
TG: never gotta go to the drugstore again you can just get doped up on my dulcet tones for the rest of time
TG: take that and some of this
TG: im packin punches
CG: OW, FUCK! NO! MY MIGRAINES!
CG: SWEEPS OF VEINCLOTTING AND NERVEFRAYING DOWN THE FUCKING GAPER. BECAUSE OF YOU.
CG: YOU ASSHOLE, THIS IS THE WORST THING THAT HAS EVER HAPPENED TO ME.
CG: AND YOU'RE LAUGHING.
TG: chuckle up it only gets worse from here
===
CG: BE HONEST WITH ME. DID FONDLING MY SHIRT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE STREET EVEN DO ANYTHING?
TG: barely but yknow sometimes you just gotta deal the cards youre given
TG: ill just be astigmatic for a while its cool
CG: PFF… OKAY MAN.
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starry-bi-sky · 18 hours
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I am loudly pushing the batdad agenda i am loudly pushing the— DPxDC Prompt
“Woah. You look like shit."
Granted, that’s probably not the first thing Danny should be saying to the guy that just bit the curb, but in his defense; he’s not running on 100% right now either.
The man -- tall, towering, and broader than Danny is tall -- whips around on his heel, black frayed cape flaring out impressively. Danny would've whistled in appreciation, but he takes the time instead to wipe the back of his hand across his mouth, smearing the blood running from his nose across his cheek.
"Sorry." He blinks widely, not even flinching as the man with the horns zeroes in on him. "That was rude of me. I have a really bad brain-to-mouth filter; Sam says its what always gets me into trouble."
And she's not wrong either, per say. His smart mouth is what landed him in this situation -- with blood blossom extract running through his veins and cannibalizing the ectoplasm in his bloodstream. Thanks Vlad.
The man grunts at him; a short, curt "hm" that shouldn't make Danny smile, but he does because he's somewhat delirious and probably concussed. The man keeps some kind of distance, sinking towards the shadows of Gotham's alleyway like he dares to melt right into it.
If it's supposed to scare Danny, it doesn't work. Danny's never been afraid of the dark; he's always been able to hide himself in it. He blinks slowly at the mass of shadows.
"You look hurt." The shadows says, blurring together around the edges. Danny squints, and licks his lips to get the blood dripping down his chin off. Ugh, he hates the taste of blood.
"I am." He says, "My godfather poisoned me. M'dying." The agony of the blood blossom eating him from the inside out looped back around to numbing a while ago, so all he feels is half-awake and dazed.
"Hey," Danny stumbles forward towards the man, a bloodied hand reaching out to him. "You-- you're a hero, right? You're not attacking me; which is more than I can say for most costumed people I've met." Maybe it's a poor bar to judge someone at, but he's already established that Danny's not in his right mind.
The man makes no change in expression, but Danny realizes blearily that it's hard to tell with the shadows on his face. He stays still long enough for Danny to latch onto the cape -- stretchy, but almost soft under his fingers.
He looks up blearily into the whites of the man's eyes. "Can you help me? I don't-- I don't wanna die." Again. He doesn't wanna die again. He blinks slow and lizard-like. "I mean- I'll probably get to see mom and dad again, but I told them I'd at least try and make it to adulthood."
There's a clatter down the street, and Danny's ghost sense chills up his spine and leaves a bitter, ashy taste in his mouth. He immediately knows who it belongs to even before the deceptively gentle; "Daniel?" echoes down the way.
"Daniel? Quit your games, badger, Gotham is dangerous for children."
Danny's mouth pulls back, and blood spills against his tongue. "Please." He rasps, and grabs onto the shadow's cape with both hands. "Please. He's going to kill me. Please--"
"Daniel? Is that you?"
His lips part, dragging in air to plead with the darkness again. He doesn't need to, the whites of his eyes narrow, and the cape whirls around him before Danny can blink. Soon swaddled in shadows, the Night lifts him up, and steals him away.
#I AM LOUDLY PUSHING THE BATDAD AGENDA#anyways— add ons are encouraged i wanna talk more dpxdc with folks i just cant find any aus i really like enough to engage with#which is nobody's fault and its why im making my own content in order to reach more people#danny fenton is not the ghost king#dpxdc#dp x dc#dpxdc crossover#dp x dc crossover#dpdc#dc x dp#dpxdc prompts#i took a ‘which batfam member are you (except its personal)’ quiz a few days ago#and got bruce wayne. and then was promptly read to filth why im most like him and it rudely but accurately explained why im the most like#him. it also consequently explained to me why i like him so much. whenever i see him in his kindest form i see a mirror looking back#anyways lots of ‘danny rejecting bruce as a parent’ aus. may i present: bruce and danny finding family in each other aus. batdad aus pls.#dpxdc prompt#dcxdp#this prompt can take place at any point of Batkid accumulation but personally i was imagining this as before Bruce has any of his kids yet#eldest brother danny supremacy and also just that one on one bonding#danny being someone who was never afraid of the dark as a kid and even less so as he got older. taking solace in it as a ghost because you#cant hide in the dark when you glow. his enemies can't jump out at him. but he can jump out at them. how can he be afraid of the dark when#the dark is where the stars like to live? there's a comfort in the shadows. there might be something hiding in it. but he's hiding in it to#blood blossoms eat ghosts headcanon#wasn't sure where i was gonna go with this at the beginning and then i caught steam.#batman casually kidnaps an orphan upon kid's request. also the kid was Actively Dying Of Poison. What was he gonna do?? NOT help him?#mister 'keeps candy in his utility belt specifically for scared children'??? no way.
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wosomaanum · 2 days
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Pains | Jessie Fleming x Reader
Summary: You we’re on day two of your period, and it hurt everywhere. You’re girlfriend, Jessie was there to help.
Warnings: anything to do with periods, medication
Notes: Short
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You were wrapped up in bed, clutching your stomach. You felt horrible and just miserable. Not only were you having severe cramps and dealing with your period, but you had a horrible headache.
“Hey babe, I saw this really cool resta-“ your girlfriend, Jessie is soon cut off by her own concern as she enters the room - her speech that trailed along the hallway coming to a halt.
“Baby what’s wrong?” Jess says instinctively, her freckles highlighted by the sun hitting her face - perfectly framing her features. All of which you adored.
“I promise it’s not that bad. I’m fine, really.” You knew you weren’t, and you knew Jessie knew that too.
Jessie cutely grumbled in a soft tone. “I know you’re not. Are you on your period, is it cramps? What do you need me to get you?” A sudden plethora of questions escaped her mouth.
“Jessie I said I’m fine.”
“You are not fine. I’m gonna get you a few things. Just stay here.”
You told her not to bother, but your words fell on deaf ears.
Soon, Jessie returned. A hot water bottle clutched in her arm and some medication and water in the other. She speed walked over to your side and crouched down next to the bed as she examined your face.
“Hey hey. It’s okay I’m here.” She comforts you, as she places the hot water bottle on your stomach. She brushes some loose strands of hair out of your face.
“I’ve got some paracetamol okay? Come on let’s just sit up for a moment.” She gently guides you so your back is against the headboard before she hands you your medication. You drink it, reluctantly - knowing your too stubborn to let others take care of you.
"Here you go, love," she says softly, handing you the medication and water. "This should help a bit.”
You didn’t grow up in a house of affection. You weren’t use to it and it made you feel awkward. You were stubborn, and you knew it but Jessie made you better. Overtime, she made a dent in your stubborn exterior slowly and slowly peeling back the layers. Of course, there was still times you felt like you were a burden but Jessie always reassured you that you weren’t.
The truth is you weren’t.
———————
Throughout the day, Jessie ensures you are as comfortable as possible. She prepares meals that are not only nutritious but also easy on your stomach. Whether it's a bowl of hearty vegetable soup or a plate of fresh fruit, she prioritizes your well-being with every bite.
"How about some soup for lunch?" she suggests. "I made your favorite vegetable soup.
"That sounds perfect," you reply, grateful for her thoughtfulness.
Understanding that rest is crucial, she encourages you to take it easy, often taking over household chores to allow you some much-needed relaxation.
"Why don't you lie down for a bit? I'll handle the laundry," she says, giving you a reassuring smile.
When the pain gets intense, Jessie is there with a stash of your favorite chocolates and a comforting hand. She’ll sit with you, holding your hand, or massaging your lower back when the cramps are unbearable.
"Do you need anything else?" she asks, her eyes full of concern. "Let me know if the cramps get worse."
"Just having you here helps a lot," you admit, squeezing her hand.
In the evenings, Jessie suggests watching your favorite shows or movies, a welcome distraction.
"How about we watch that new comedy series you've been wanting to see?" she offers, dimming the lights and creating a cozy atmosphere. You snuggle up together on the couch, her warmth and care transforming these difficult days into manageable ones.
Jessie’s unwavering support not only eases the physical discomfort but also makes you feel profoundly loved and cared for. "I don't know what I'd do without you," you whisper, snuggled against her.
"You'll never have to find out," she replies, kissing your forehead gently.
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inkyray · 2 days
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neighbor!chris x reader part 7
a/n; not text messages yet yall we're getting there, part 6 here
You
You watched him approach you, an expression on his face that told you everything you needed to know. He had forgotten about you, and remembered too late. That was your given conclusion the moment you saw him clutter onto the beach.
When you first went in the water, got carried away for half an hour in the water and came out, expecting him to be there, you didn't find him. You checked your phone to make sure if he had sent a message or something, he hadn't even opened your previous message asking if he was there. Hurt pooled up in your stomach, but a part of you wanted to reassure itself for the better. I threw your phone back to its spot on the towel-covered sand, your emotions quickly replacing itself with anger, and you went for another dive in the ocean.
Now you dried your legs, looking back onto your body as if you truly cared about getting yourself dry as Chris marched toward you. "Hey!" He jogged over, a nervous look on his face as he calculated your mood. "I know I'm late but we can still make time for—"
"I'm surprised you showed up at all." You interrupt, your tongue bittersweet in your mouth. "I was gonna come–I swear–but I just got so caught up with everything." Chris winces, knowing he'd have to try harder than that. You scan him up and down, he looked normal, like every other day he'd pass by your house or stalk past your window. "I'm sure you were, Chris." You sigh, slipping on your clothes over your bathing suit. You don't bother hiding the fact you were upset, but at the same time, you didn't quite show it. It drove him nuts.
"I'm sorry, I came as soon as I could–"
"Did you though?" You wonder out loud, getting ready to leave as he stood there, watching you. "This was the first time we actually wanted to hang out together, just want to point that out." You laugh a little.
You hear him ramble in your ear, and in all honesty, you tune him out, walking past him as he follows you behind like a dog. He gave every excuse he could think of, but truly, you hadn't heard a single word. "Look, Chris." You turn to face him after he trails behind you a little longer. "It's okay. I forgive you." You forgave him, shit happens, but that doesn't mean you weren't still salty about it.
"Really?" His eyes widened, like he didn't take you for the kind of girl to forgive so fast.  You nod. "Yeah." But nothing in your tone seemed sincere, negative feelings started to erupt in Chris's stomach, and he couldn't quite decipher what they were. You watched him gulp.
"How about we come again? Tomorrow? This time we'll both be free with no work and, this time I could pick you up instead— Take you there myself." He plans out loud, and you audibly sigh. "I have work tomorrow, how about just take me home instead? That's all I want."
And that's what he did.
He took you to Matt's car, and you sat in the passenger seat as they drove you home in silence. Chris sat in the back with Nick as he kept glancing back at you, trying to make something out of your expression. You had a good poker face.
Nick kept studying the atmosphere of the energy that had appeared the moment you two had entered, and immediately knew there was negative tension. He gave Matt a look from the rear mirror, and they shared an understanding. Something was wrong.
You weren't dumb, you were aware that Chris kept bouncing his leg behind you in nervousness, you knew that he kept looking at you and burning holes into your skin, so did his brother that accompanied him in the back. Thankfully, they didn't decide to ask a single thing, keeping the talk small, short, and sweet. You had gotten close to all of them since you moved, but you knew you'd still have to go a long way before they were fully loose around you.
"Were the waves bad today? I've been wanting to go to the beaches here but never came around to doing it." Matt randomly asks as he makes a left. He really just wanted to squash down the awkward silence with anything, and Nick mentally applauded him for it. You took the hint and responded.
"They were huge, I almost drowned today but I thugged it out." You laugh at the memory that was only a few minutes ago, thankfully you were a strong swimmer. They took note of your light-hearted attempt at humor and ran with it, the attempt working completely. "Really? I thought the waves here were like, calm as fuck." Nick stated.
"I wouldn't know," You run a hand through your dampened sea-salted hair. "It was my first time going to the beaches here."
"We're actually still yet to go to them, a whale washed up on shore a few months ago and that kind of scared us off." Nick openly laughed at the irony of the reason, and you chuckled with him.
The rest of the car ride was dreadful for Chris, you engaged with all of his brothers in a conversation but him. He could help but feel bad—and jealous. He knew he had brought it on to himself, and he'd need to find a way to make it up, fast.
But now, he'd have to face a really loud conversation with his brothers, who decided to corner him as soon as they made it home.
-
-taglist-
@pepsiboyy @jetaimevous @luvr4miya @christopherscamopants @imwetforyourmom @mattssluttywaist @sturnsxplr-25 @flosslikeabosss @meg-sturniolo @stasiesturn @realuvrrr @always-reading @lovergirl4387 @sleepysturnss @milesfordays11 @nonat-111 @liagazed @freshloveforthefit @blueeyedbesson @h3arts4harry @hypnotizedsturn @sturnthepot
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artist-issues · 17 hours
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every now and then I play with the exercise of "what if we're wrong" because sometimes I get bored and also as an actual exercise. I usually apply this to Christianity/religion, matters of the after life, or about other people.
So sometimes I poke at the big question, if Christianity isn't real, what does that mean? And I don't usually go the route of atheism or bad sci fi, just that the religion is proven to be fundamentally inaccurate to reality, so what does that mean?
Anyway it wasn't until I was reading a really good sci fi story, where this one dude explains to some aliens the concept of "Love your enemies, do good to those that hurt you" and of course the aliens are like what? (Because in the sci fi narrative the universe is functioning under a Dark Forest Theory) And the dude explains its from one of earth's greatest teachers. And the aliens are like, if the inhabitants of the universe could believe that, this universe would be a different place entirely.
And it was at that point where I realized bro... even if it's not accurate, practicing Christianity is still worth it, for a human being. Loving your enemies means loving them like humans. The Poor, the Meek, and those who mourn, those are promises and comforts that we shouldn't toss aside even if heaven isn't real.
I don't know, this is just a terribly simplistic because I'm not the best at putting my English thoughts into english out loud, but that crack gave me a touch of useful coping. I asked my dad, if aliens are proven to exist it doesn't automatically mean christians stop practicing and believing, right? And he said obviously not.
I don't know but have you ever engaged in such a question " what if we're wrong?" And if you ever have what answer had you arrived at?
I mean, I play that “game” all the time about other things, and sometimes I do it for work. I’ll take two established characters and a setting me and my friends have agreed on, and I’ll “run a scenario.”
But the thing is, once my brain picks out something that doesn’t make sense, or that wouldn’t be in-character for the characters to do, the whole scenario grinds to a halt and I have to start over. I can’t suspend my own disbelief once I notice that something doesn’t line up. Even if I really liked “where the scene was going” before I noticed that thing. Whatever I’m getting stuck on because of it’s out-of-character nature unravels the parts I like, too.
All that to say I can’t even run a scenario in my head where “what if all this isn’t true? What if it fundamentally doesn’t line up with reality?”
I can’t. Once or twice I have tried. But I hit snags immediately. I’ll go, “pretend all of this Christian religion really is just a centuries-old conspiracy humanity’s been patching up the holes in.”
But then that little simulation-checker in my brain goes, “then how do you explain people dying for it? That many martyrs aren’t likely to have allowed themselves to be tortured and murdered for something they knew was a conspiracy.”
And I go, “well, pretend they died because they didn’t know it was a conspiracy, they believed it.”
And the sim-checker goes, “but the original disciples of Jesus, ground-zero of the faith, were all martyred. Not just people who learned from them and came after them and could’ve been hoodwinked: the starting points, themselves. They would’ve had to know it was a conspiracy, if it was a conspiracy, and they still willingly died for it.”
Maybe I’ll pivot and go, “pretend there isn’t objective truth.”
And the sim-checker goes, “there isn’t truth…objectively?”
Maybe I’ll pivot again and try, “pretend that everyone really does just measure morality based on what they’re used to, what their individual society’s trained them to associate with pleasant feelings and reactions.”
And the sim-checker goes, “Okay, where did those societies get the training manual? Where did it come from? Why do so many different societies’ and people groups’ ‘association with pleasant feelings and reactions’ around the world have so many things in common?”
And the answers to all that leads me back to Christianity. Even if I go the longest way round I can think of.
And eventually I quit running those scenarios. Because guess what?
Where’d the ability to run scenarios come from?
How did I get that? How did you?
See, the thing is, we go, “what if all of this isn’t true?” But it’s right there in the question. “Where did you get that desire? The desire for “truth?”” Is it to keep yourself safe, like the natural animals have an instinct toward, or is it to keep yourself sane, because you need some sense in this life to make it through? Sure. Maybe. But why? What’s “sane?” What’s “safe?” Sanity presupposes order. Why do you, and all humans, naturally lean toward wanting things to be “the way they’re supposed to be?” Where’d that come from, that idea of “supposed to be?” And Safety presupposes good being found in avoiding pain and damage and fear. “Good?” Where’d you get that idea?”
The further you dig, even into your own psyche, the less you can run any scenario that has God absent entirely. And no wonder. He designed it.
One more thing.
“I am trying here to prevent anyone saying the really foolish thing that people often say about Him: I’m ready to accept Jesus as a great moral teacher, but I don’t accept his claim to be God. That is the one thing we must not say. A man who was merely a man and said the sort of things Jesus said would not be a great moral teacher. He would either be a lunatic — on the level with the man who says he is a poached egg — or else he would be the Devil of Hell. You must make your choice. Either this man was, and is, the Son of God, or else a madman or something worse. You can shut him up for a fool, you can spit at him and kill him as a demon or you can fall at his feet and call him Lord and God, but let us not come with any patronizing nonsense about his being a great human teacher. He has not left that open to us. He did not intend to.” - C.S. Lewis
I used to lean into the idea you’re saying here. “Even if it’s not true, I’m going to live like it is and believe it just in case. Besides, it makes me better, and makes the world better.” That’s not belief at all. That’s ends-justify-the-means thinking. The teachings that Jesus gave which “make the world a better place” are utterly worthless if they’re coming out of the mouth of a liar. Because why should anyone believe Him? Why should anyone “turn the other cheek,” or “do unto others?” Because it makes us “better?” Who gets to define “better?”
The answer, of course, is Jesus does. The One who taught those sayings. But only if He’s God. Only if He was telling the truth. If He wasn’t God, what right has He, to tell us to give away our possessions to others and let them abuse us and give our lives up? If He was a liar, all of those “good teachings” would be tainted and untrustworthy. Besides, like I just said, they’re all only able to be called “good” teachings if you accept that there is one objective, universal “good.” And we’re right back to “where did Good come from?”
All roads lead back there, to Him. But we humans like to do this thing with God where we pretend there could be any reality outside of Him. It sort of makes sense, how we got that way. After all, when was the last time you noticed oxygen? How often during the day do you consciously inhale and exhale? As often as it happens automatically? How often during the day do you notice oxygen touching your skin or moving your hair or drying your eyeballs? As often as those things happen automatically? No. But it’s ever-present. Without it, you couldn’t live, let alone notice anything. But oxygen has always been around and everything in our lives interacts with or can only exist WITH it. God is much more than that, but that’s as close as I can get to communicating: He’s so good, and He’s so constantly there, everything, all the time, that it’s easy for us to take Him for granted, forget Him entirely, then use our two-pound brain matter to say, “He might not exist.” You might as well say, “imagine a world with no matter.” 🙄 “Ohhhh kay. Then it wouldn’t be a world.”
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bandgie · 21 hours
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Cat and Mouse
mdni18+ | fem!reader, pussy eating, teeth use, manipulation (from both parties), fuckboy!wooyoung, cum eating (m!), semi-public oral
2.3k words
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You never understood why people don't like fuck boys.
Okay, that's an overstatement. You do know why. They lie, they cheat, and they make pretty little promises in hopes of getting in your pants. They think with the head between their legs and drool at the sight of new pussy. Truly, they were just men who peaked in high school. 
They're pathetic, but easy.
A game is a game, and these types of men tend to forget it's multiplayer. All you have to do is act a little clueless, pretend to be happy to see them, and their absolute favorite, be innocent. Be the perfect little prey they think you are and they'll do anything for a chance. 
It really is easy. 
It's how you managed to snag a date with Wooyoung. He had been asking for weeks since the semester started. Walking you to class, to your car, seeming like a nice boy on the outside, but you know better. You've seen the subtle winks to his friends, the predatory gaze on your body. As much as you would have loved to give it up on the first day, you want to at least have some of a good time and not fucked like a fleshlight. 
You can still picture the grin on his face, the way the mole under his eye shifted with his smile. Well, you don't have to imagine it. He's giving you like sly look now, one hand on the wheel while he's turned to you. The car's been in park for a while. Wooyoung claimed he needed a minute to sit after a nice dinner. It's been way past a minute, however, and the conversation took a bit of a sexual turn.
"I dunno," you shyly rub your hands together. "I don't think I'll be any good."
Wooyoung is patient though, more than you would have thought. "That's okay. We don't even have to do anything. I would just love to keep hanging out with you." I would love to put my dick in your pussy, is what he's really saying, but at least he's being nice about it. "I won't do anything you're not comfortable with."
You nod, pretending to think about what you want to do. "It's just you're so nice and so good-looking. I don't want you to think anything bad of me." Wooyoung is already shaking his head before you can finish, "I would never think of you differently. If you're attracted to somebody, and they're attracted to you, there's nothing wrong with acting on it. But don't feel like you have to. I can talk with you just like this and feel just as happy."
Definitely a smooth talker. You can't help but think about how many hearts he's broken with those lies. "You promise?"
"Of course," but his fox smile gives it away. "You're cool. I haven't felt this comfortable on a date like this before." It's not a shock he's feeling that way. You've perfected your lines and your bashful looks to get him right where he is. The way your dress clings to your body only helps. It's short enough to imagine bending you over the hood of the car and low-cut enough for Wooyoung to keep glancing down at your chest. The dress isn't enough to scream slut! but enough for curious eyes to wander. 
"Thank you," you giggle. "I don't think anyone's told me that before." Your admission makes Wooyoung smile. A genuine look of satisfaction as if it's his heart that swells instead of his cock. He tilts his head to the side. A strand of hair falls over his forehead from the movement. He's cute, hot with his hair slicked back. It's easy to fall under his spell and if you're not careful, you might slip.
But you're well versed with men like him.
You let him lean close, you let his hand gently cup the side of your face. You're fully expecting teeth and tongue, but Wooyoung pauses just before your lips make contact. His dark eyes glance to yours, waiting. 
You nod.
The kiss is not what you were expecting from him. It's not hungry not is it demanding. It's gentle, it's sweet, and it's comfortable. You easily slide against his lips, your hand grabbing onto his wrist and bringing him closer. He tastes slightly like the meat he ordered earlier. It makes you smile into the kiss and you feel him smile back.
You're the one to pull away first. Your lips disconnect with a soft smack and you look into his eyes. "Was that okay?" His body slightly shivers, and he nods while chuckling. "Yes. That was better than okay." You laugh with him, noticing how his hand drops to the exposed part of your thigh to gently rub your skin. 
Only a second of silence passes before Wooyoung asks, "Can we do something a little more?" Then he quickly adds, "If not I totally understand." You have to bite back a smile, you've never met a fuckboy so honest yet deceiving at the same time.
"I dunno, Wooyoung," you play with his hand that's on your lap. "I think hookups are...unfair." This makes him raise an eyebrow, "Unfair? I don't think I've heard that one before. Can I ask why?"
"Like..." you pretend to think of your rehearsed words. "The girl doesn't really get to...finish. You know what I mean?" Judging from the shocked and slightly offended look on Wooyoung's face, you think you have him. "I'm not saying you can't, but I know it's a thing that guys have a hard time making the girl feel good."
Wooyoung is silent for a minute. You can't tell what he's thinking and you begin to think that maybe he took it personally. You're preparing for the worst when he lays his seat all the way down.
"What are doing?"
"Gonna prove you wrong," he simply says. "Come on, right here." Wooyoung points to his face, You narrow your eyes, unsure of what he's asking. "You want me to keep kissing you like that?"
"Nooo," he laughs and shakes his head. "Sit on it." You sputter a choked laugh. This wasn't quite what you had in mind. You thought he'd tell you that he was different, that he would flick your clit while bouncing you on his lap. Just some effort to make you cum, not have a face-sitting session. 
Not what you were expecting, but you're already eager to lift your dress. 
You play with the hem of your clothes, "Right now?" He nods, licking his lips. "Yep. It's already late and hardly anyone knows this place. I got tinted windows too. You don't have to worry too much, pretty." 
Shit, he's good. He took you to a low-key place, paid for dinner, kissed you almost passionately, and gave you an offer you couldn't refuse. Perhaps this mouse has more tricks than you bargained for.
"O-okay," you try to keep your innocent façade. "Just, let me know if you can't breathe." Wooyoung lets out a last laugh and helps you crawl to him. It's difficult to not step on his limbs, but you manage to hobble over his shoulders. One knee is bent on the headrest just next to his head. Your other knee is planted on the backseat, keeping you hovering above Wooyoung's face. You've perched your arms on the headrest of the back seat, facing the rear window and arching your back. 
It's not the most ideal position, but you have to give Wooyoung some credit. It's doable at the very least.
Wooyoung does the honor of keeping your dress lifted. His eyes lock at your clothed core, plain underwear with the only decoration being a small wet spot where your entrance is. 
"Someone got a little excited, huh?" He giggles at himself. "Do you care about your underwear getting a little more wet?"
And he's a tease? You think you're in over your head with this one. "It's okay." You feel Wooyoung nod under you and soon feel a hot muscle over your clit. 
Granted, it's not as hot compared to if he took your underwear off, but it still makes you jump. Wooyoung keeps his tongue flat while moving it in gentle circles. You rock your hips against his mouth, following his muscle.
You gasp at the feel of something hard. It takes a second for your brain to register his teeth running against your slit. Your underwear makes the perfect barrier for the sensation to be wonderfully strange. You let out a moan and grind on his face. His nose bumps the peak of your clit every time you move up and he seems to be completely okay being ambushed in your cunt.
"Mmf! Like it that much?" Wooyoung pulls away just enough to speak. You grind a little more before answering, "I dunno yet."
That spurs him on. Wooyoung bunches your dress in one fist and uses his free hand to move your underwear to the side. You can't tell, but he can see how messy your pussy is. Your clit is fat, wet with need, and begging for Wooyoung to directly touch it. It makes something in him primal, aching for your raw taste on his tastebuds. 
His tongue swipes over your cunt, letting your juices soak his muscle. You whine at the feeling of him and still your hips. Wooyoung's thumb hooks over your underwear so the rest of his fingers splay over your thigh. He squeezes and kneads your flesh, strangely adding to the pleasure of him tasting you.
The further he digs his digits, the more you moan. It's a trick you didn't even know existed and Wooyoung is using your surprise to his advantage. 
His kitten lick feels good alone, but your toes curl at the feeling of him sucking. Wooyoung has your nub in his mouth with his tongue rolling against it. You squeal and your hips buck so roughly that your pussy pops from his mouth with a wet sound.
"Damn," he sounds raspy. "Didn't think you'd have such a sensitive pussy." Wooyoung strains his neck to reach up, latching onto your cunt once more. You whimper and carefully place your weight back on, trying your best not to move this time.
"I just," you let out a moan when he sucks it again. "It's just been a while."
Which is a lie. Well, somewhat. You got eaten out not that long ago, but not this good. Not in a position where you could get caught, where he adds the tiniest bit of pain to add to the pleasure. Everything's an additional layer of arousal that you didn't think you needed. 
Wooyoung says something but it sounds like muffles in your cunt. You hone in on sliding against his face, making sure his nose and chin bump your clit with every drag. Maybe you're going a little crazy on your first date, but there's no guarantee you'll get another chance like this. You might as well use it to your advantage.
Your orgasm slowly builds. You can feel the heat in your stomach and chest, making you whine louder and higher. Wooyoung groans with you, gripping your waist and thigh harder as you suffocate him. You hang your head to look down at him, but all you can see is the top of his hair. Even if you can't see him devouring your cunt, the sight makes you clench. A reminder about how terribly empty you are.
As if knowing, Wooyoung dips his tongue until it catches your entrance. He buries it in you, uncaring how tight your pussy squeezes him and leaks. You whimper, unmoving so Wooyoung can thrust his tongue deep inside.
"Fuck. If you keep doing that I'll cum."
You nearly scream when he doesn't stop. He goes faster, so hard that you can hear the lewd noises vibrating in the car. He gulps down your essence, he moans into your pulsing cunt. Never have you met such an eager fuckboy. One who goes above and beyond without getting his dick wet once.
It's almost cute, but you don't dwell on it too much when you finally tip over. Your walls clench Wooyoung's tongue, creaming so much that it paints his lips white. He fucks you through it as he manages to slide his tongue out and across your clit. 
You rest your cheek against the cushion of the backseat. Normally, guys are eager to push you off and shove their dicks in, but not Wooyoung. He eats you steadily and overwhelmingly. You're the one prying yourself from his mouth, chuckling at his protests and pleas for you to take back your seat.
Your back aches from being arched and your legs scream as you wobbly sit back on the passenger side. Wooyoung shifts his seat up while swiping his lips with his thumb. He collects the last bits of cream and pops it back into his mouth. 
By far the weirdest fuckboy you've encountered, but you're not complaining. You got to cum good, got to ride out your high, and got a meal paid for. You're expecting him to ask for a blowjob, but he twists the keys into the ignition and it roars to life.
"Oh," you hadn't meant to say it out loud, but Wooyoung hears you. He turns his head to you, lips shining with your cum. "What? I'm taking you home right?"
You blink at him, completely thrown for a loop. It takes a few awkward seconds before you answer, "Yeah. Sounds good."
You're starting to think maybe he came his pants and is too shy to do anything else, but you catch the smirk as he turns back to the front windshield and puts the car in reverse. 
It then occurs to you that maybe you weren't the cat after all. 
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yelenasdiary · 11 hours
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Hello 👋
I saw your requests say open, but I know you're struggling with motivation to get content out so no worries if you cannot or don't want to fulfill this but I'm having a surgery soon so I'm requesting from some of my friends/fav writers hoping it helps me out in recovery.
Anyway sorry for the rambling lol, here's my idea. I was thinking like something with BuckyNat and R where Reader has to undergo surgery for something (maybe an old injury became too bad to deal with or maybe something happened on a mission that needs attention) and they're super nervous about it and hesitant to agree so Nat and Bucky sit down with them and just offer lots or love and support (even though they're both nervous too cuz that's their girl) so when Rs getting the surgery they're a bit of a mess until they know she's alright and then they help her settle into their room and help care for her as she starts to mend.
If you decide to write it I thank you lots in advance ☺️
Drabble || It's All Gonna Be Okay
Pairing: BuckyNat x Reader
Summary: When a mission goes wrong, you're told you need realignment osteotomy surgery, the idea of it makes you worried and full of nerves in which your partners help you overcome.
Tiny Angst, Fluff
Warnings: Medical talk, she/her pronouns used (I hope that's okay!!), This is not corrected or proof read. | 0.6K
Translations: detka (baby),
AC: I hope your op goes well!! I also hope this helps, sorry I made it a Drabble, I wanted to get this posted asap for you x
Bucky smiled softly at you, "what's on your mind doll?" he asked seeing your mind was a million miles away. Natasha sitting on the right side of your hospital bed, she looked up at the two of you.
"The thought of being put to sleep and some stranger playing around inside my body and touching my bones is freaking me out" you replied honestly. Bucky let out a soft chuckle, "doll, they are professionals" he reminded you.
"Yeah, they're not even thinking about how weird it is that they're touching somebodies bones" Nat pitched in. Sure, they had a point the thought of it was still uncomfortable. "Okay but what if something goes wrong?" you questioned. Nat placed her hand on top of yours, "detka, I promise you nothing is going to happen"
"That's right doll, nothing is going happen to my darling. You'll be in and out in no time and Nat and I will be waiting by your side" Bucky added. You looked over to him on your left side, "do you promise?" you asked.
"Have I ever broken a promise to you before?" he questioned with a soft smile. The support from the two of them did help ease some of your nerves and finally you agreed with your surgeon that you'd have the surgery on the condition that both Nat and Bucky were able to watch from the viewing room. At first your surgeon wasn't onboard with the idea but with a little sweet talking from Bucky and the two of them were sat in the view room watching the surgery unfold from above.
"She'll be okay" Natasha places her hand on Bucky's knee when she noticed the worrying look in his eyes. "I know but still, that's our girl down there, I can't help but worry" he replied. Nat rested her head on Bucky's right shoulder, "I know love, I'm worried too" she admitted.
They watched for what felt like forever until the operation was a success and you were returned to your room when both Nat and Bucky waited patiently for you to wake up, both of them holding your hand. When your eyes finally fluttered open, smiles filled the room. Bucky was relieved and Nat was just happy to see your beautiful eyes once more.
"How are you feeling detka?" Natasha asked, placing a kiss on your temple. "Tired" you replied, struggling to keep your eyes open, the last of the anaesthesia winning the battle making your partners lightly chuckle.
"I'll go get us some dinner, what do you want?" Nat asked Bucky knowing full well he wasn't going to leave your side for a second. "Burgers?" he replied, looking up at Nat as she placed a hand on his left shoulder, "you've got it soldier" Nat said, placing a kiss on his cheek.
----
A few weeks after your operation you started PT. Natasha made her it mission to make sure you had the best physiotherapist in the county, although you told Natasha it wasn't necessary but Bucky was on team Nat and you lost that battle.
Bucky basically waited on you hand and foot, he just wanted to make sure you were okay and in no pain. Night was one your favourite time of day because Natasha would somehow have dinner ready, by somehow you mean you were sure that Wanda cooked and Nat took the credit but you thought it was sweet she wanted to do something nice each night and let it slide.
After dinner, the three of you would snuggle up in bed, carefully of your knee of course but with the two people you love the most beside you, the pain from your knee was the least of your worries.
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Note
AITA for not being entirely negative about AI?
05/16/2024
Just before anyone scrolls down just to vote YTA, please hear me out: I'm not an AI bro, I am a hobbyist artist, I do not use generative AI, I know that it's all mostly based off stolen work and that's obviously Bad.
That being said, I am also an IT major so I understand the technology behind it as well as the industry using it. Because of this I understand that at this point it is very, very unlikely that AI art will ever go away, I feel like the best deal out of it that actual artists can get out of it is a compromise on what is and isn't allowed to be used for machine learning. I would love to be proven wrong though and I'm still hoping the lawsuits against Open AI and others will set a precedent for favouring artists over the technology.
Now, to the meat of this ask: I was talking in a discord sever with my other artist friends some of which are actually professionals (all around same age as me) and the topic of discussion was just how much AI art sucks, mostly concerning the fact that another artist we like (but don't know personally) had their works stolen and used in AI. The conversation then developed into talking about how hard it is to get a job in the industry where we live and how AI is now going to make that even worse. That's when I said something along the lines of: "In an ideal world, artists would get paid for all the works of theirs that are in AI learning databases so they can have easy passive income and not have to worry about getting jobs at shitty companies that wouldn't appreciate them anyway." To me that seemed like a pretty sensible take. I mean, if could just get free money every month for (consensually) putting a few dozens of my pieces in some database one time, I honestly would probably leave IT and just focus on art full time since that's always been my passion whereas programming is more of a "I'm good at it but not that excited about doing it, but it pays well so whatever".
My friends on the other hand did not share the sentiment, saying that in an ideal world AI art would be outlawed and the companies hiring them would not be shitty. I did agree about the companies being less shitty, but disagreed about AI being outlawed. I said that the major issue with AI are the copyright concerns so if tech companies were just forced to get artist's full permission to using their work first as well as providing monetary compensation there really wouldn't be anything wrong with using the technology (when concerning stylized AI art, not deepfakes or realistic AI images as those have a completely different slew of moral issues).
This really pissed a few of them off and they accused me of defending AI art. I had to explain to them that I wasn't defending AI art as it was NOW, because I know that the way it works NOW is very harmful, I was just saying that as an IDEAL scenario, not even something I think is particularly realistic, but something I think would be cool if it were actually possible. The rest of the argument was honestly just spinning in circles with me trying to explain the same points and them being outraged at the fact that I'm not 100% wholeheartedly bashing even the mere concept of AI until I just got frustrated and left the conversation.
It's been about a week and I haven't spoken to the friends I had that argument with since then. I still interact on the server and I see them interacting there too but we just kinda avoid each other. It's making me rethink the whole situation and wonder if I really was in the wrong for saying that and if I should just apologize.
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bethanydelleman · 2 days
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do you have any theories on why wickham turned out the way he did? his background sounds humble but not dirt poor as i know steward was a really valued job at the time. and as the elder mr. darcy liked him, he probably had a better life than plenty of boys. correct me if i'm wrong but i don't recall any mention of a mom or siblings, so darcy was probably his main childhood companion. it's just horrible to think that over the years he went from seeing darcy as a friend to someone he could ruin. and he was prepared to ruin georgiana's life, not just take all her money but cause a scandal so she might not ever get married again. and if darcy hadn't found lydia he'd probably just leave her where she was with no way of getting home and destroyed the bennets. like why? everyone was nothing but nice to him his whole life and all he does is hurt them and enjoy doing it. when you think about it kind of sounds evil.
From what I understand, Wickham was a failure of a system whereby a rich person would choose someone poorer to patronize. We can see other examples of this in Emma (Jane Fairfax & Harriet Smith) and especially Mansfield Park (Fanny & William Price).
The idea was that the rich would find someone worthy of improvement, sponsor their education, and give them the ability to raise into the gentry class. This sounds like what Mr. Darcy Sr. tried with Wickham, but in this case it was a failure. What ended up happening isn't that Wickham was grateful, but he ended up feeling entitled to the life of a Darcy. The novel's implication is that Wickham had a bad character, which education could not improve, and that Mr. Darcy Sr. was deceived in because Wickham had a veneer of decency.
From Darcy's Letter:
Mr. Wickham is the son of a very respectable man, who had for many years the management of all the Pemberley estates, and whose good conduct in the discharge of his trust naturally inclined my father to be of service to him; and on George Wickham, who was his godson, his kindness was therefore liberally bestowed. My father supported him at school, and afterwards at Cambridge; most important assistance, as his own father, always poor from the extravagance of his wife, would have been unable to give him a gentleman’s education. My father was not only fond of this young man’s society, whose manners were always engaging, he had also the highest opinion of him, and hoping the church would be his profession, intended to provide for him in it. As for myself, it is many, many years since I first began to think of him in a very different manner. The vicious propensities, the want of principle, which he was careful to guard from the knowledge of his best friend, could not escape the observation of a young man of nearly the same age with himself, and who had opportunities of seeing him in unguarded moments, which Mr. Darcy could not have.
Wickham's account:
“We were born in the same parish, within the same park; the greatest part of our youth was passed together: inmates of the same house, sharing the same amusements, objects of the same parental care."
In Mansfield Park, Sir Thomas talks about how difficult it will be to maintain the distinction between his daughters and Fanny, their adopted niece, and when I think about how Wickham turned out, I think this is meant to be taken seriously (even though Sir Thomas and Mrs. Norris screwed up massively):
“There will be some difficulty in our way, Mrs. Norris,” observed Sir Thomas, “as to the distinction proper to be made between the girls as they grow up: how to preserve in the minds of my daughters the consciousness of what they are, without making them think too lowly of their cousin; and how, without depressing her spirits too far, to make her remember that she is not a Miss Bertram. I should wish to see them very good friends, and would, on no account, authorise in my girls the smallest degree of arrogance towards their relation; but still they cannot be equals. Their rank, fortune, rights, and expectations will always be different. It is a point of great delicacy, and you must assist us in our endeavours to choose exactly the right line of conduct.”
Fanny feels grateful for what the Bertrams give her, even though it's scraps of a real education. Wickham ends up feeling entitled, even though he is "liberally bestowed" and that may have been the problem. He was treated too similarly to Darcy and felt that he was a Darcy, only to find out the patronage didn't go as far as he wanted.
Wickham comes off to me as one of those people who is ALWAYS innocent in his own mind, someone else is always the cause of his misfortunes (he's like Willoughby in that respect). So when he tells Elizabeth about how he lost his inheritance, I think he believes what he is saying. He does think Darcy cheated him somehow even though he was in the wrong. Darcy becomes the tyrant because Wickham refuses to be the villain of his own story.
In addition, I don't know if he would have seen Darcy as a friend. Darcy is one of the few people who can see through Wickham and a con man would hate that. Wickham's dislike of Darcy may well have started because he hates that Darcy can perceive and judge the real him.
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hellfirecvnt · 1 day
Text
Preoccupied
Lee Russell x Fem!Reader pt. 4
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Summary: A plan is hatching, sure. You and Lee can't stay focused. What are you two thinking about?
Warnings: ***Sex, drunk sex, drunk driving is bad but don't lose the plot here, riding
Notes: I'm changing the plot and timeline and shit so it's more fun to read and so I don't rip off other writers!
Read part one here. // Part two here. // Part three here.
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Monday morning pries through the window like the hands of a thief as it snatches away your blissful sleep before your alarm. You sit up in your bed and extend into a long, pleasant stretch. You pull your blanket around you and a certain lingering scent of cologne takes over your senses. You close your eyes and relive Friday night.
"Do you wanna come back to my place?" You're unsure what possessed you to be so bold. Lee raises his eyebrows, a sly smile spread across his lips. The car ride is full of palpable tension, you nearly chew your lip clean off. The second you two drunken fools step out of the car, his lips are on yours. Desperate hands cling to any part of your body he can grasp.
Lee pins you to the car, and soft moans escape from both of you as you move your heads in sync. You trip and fumble over each other as you make your way to the door, nearly entirely without breaking the kiss. You finally get the lock unhatched and burst through the front entrance of your home. You both stumble inside and finally, your faces separate, only to catch your breath. Lee stares at you, carefully studying the features of your face as if he's not sure if this is real or not.
You lead him to your bedroom and lightly shove him so he sits on the bed. He watches you with a buzzed grin, amazed by you. You plant another long, hungry kiss on his lips before lowering to your knees in front of him.
"Oh... Oh!" He's excited by your initiative, watching as your delicate hands unfasten his belt and work to free his still-swelling erection.
You blink yourself out of the memory when you hear your alarm go off.
"Oh, fuck!" you exclaim aloud, shaken from your blissful reminiscing. After silencing the alarm, you get ready for the day. Lee Russell consumed your every thought all morning. Something about your inability to know how that night ended for him makes you nervous to see him today. All you know is he was gone by Saturday morning when you woke up. You're not sure how to feel.
You park your car and release a stressed sigh. There's no getting around it. If last night was a drunken mistake for Lee, that's just something you have to accept and move on from. Preferably fast. You step in the door and greet the other staff as you pass by. Just as you're about to round the desk and take your seat, the young teacher from the other day approaches you.
"Hey, Y/N," he chimes, more familiar than you recall giving him permission to be.
"Hello, Mr. Hayden," you speak with a tone meant to hint at your disapproval of his overly friendly manner.
"Some of the teachers were talking and they said you got drinks with Gamby and Russell," he laughs. "I'm so sorry, that must've been hell." He's not wrong, you recall Dr. Brown pissing on a cop car.
"I happened to run into them there, yes. I left before they did, though. Thank you for your... Apology?" You knit your brow and attempt to disengage from the conversation.
"Well," Bill steps in front of you again, demanding your attention. "I just wanted to let you know, me and the other teachers do payday drinks every Friday. You're welcome to come. It might be a little better... Conversation wise." Mr. Hayden laughs at his own quip and you stare straight faced.
"That won't be necessary, Hayden. Ms. Y/L/N is in good hands." Lee appears from nowhere, slipping a long, nimble arm around your shoulder as he stands next to you. "Let's all get back to work, shall we? Bell's about to ring." He sassily bobs his head, staring daggers into Bill Hayden. The teacher glances at you and then back to Lee before rolling his eyes and heading to his classroom. The bell rings just a moment after he rounds the corner.
"Lee Russell, to the rescue." You smile up at him as he frees you from his close-knit grasp.
"Good morning, darlin'. You sleep well?" He tilts his head playfully, subtly looking for the answer in your eyes.
"Like a baby," you laugh, nervous from the way he's looking at you. He's fighting tooth and nail inside to keep his behavior professional, only because apparently Super Intendant Haas plans to make a surprise visit after Dr. Brown "mysteriously" put in her resignation letter after meeting with her early this morning by the train tracks.
"Don't look at me with those big doe eyes, sweetheart. You know Haas can't see me with an underling. We'll both get fired."
"An underling? Harsh. You were the one under me," you joke, quietly, taking your seat behind your desk. You lean forward, keeping your eyes locked with his, pushing your breasts together as you pull your blouse down to tease him. Lee's eyes widen for just a moment as he glances down to your chest.
"Keep it in your pants, Y/L/N. I'll make it worth your while." He winks before disappearing into his office. Behind that door, Lee closes the wide sets of blinds, closing off visibility inside his small, glass-walled office. In the dim light, he leans back in his chair, a distressed hand readjusting his pants as his mind drifts off to memories of the weekend.
Your large, shining eyes glare up at him from where you kneel with one gentle hand wrapped around his shaft. Your hand sits perfectly still and yet his breathing is still shuddered, just seeing you touch him like this. His eyes roll back as you begin to work your hand up and down with a firm grip. You smile, proud of the reaction you're getting. You take it a step further and lick a firm stripe up his length from base to tip.
"Jesus Fucking Christ," he groans, reaching a hand down to wrap a fist in your hair. You position your pouting lips at the tip of his cock, leaving gentle kisses before allowing him into your mouth. You bob your head up and down, occasionally taking a new position to take him deeper and deeper into your throat. He's well endowed, and tears prickle at your eyes as you push yourself to your limit trying to please him.
He holds the fist of of your hair firmly, forcing you into a rhythm of his choice. When he pushes you too far, you moan in protest against his skin. The vibration is enough to send him over the edge right then.
"Shhh, shhh," he whispers. "Can't believe this dirty little fuckin' mouth of yours." He throws his head back, basking in the warmth of your mouth for a few seconds longer before roughly pulling you away from him altogether. "Get on the bed, sweetheart."
A hard knock at Lee's office door returns him to reality. He's quick to grant entry to whoever waits outside and in walks Super Intendant Haas.
Back at your desk, you're on the phone with an inquiring parent and Gamby zooms past you.
"Shut the fuck up, Y/L/N, I'm in a meeting!" he says, lightning fast, as he beelines for Lee's office door. The three men have their meeting and you can't help but glance back at the closed blinds every so often, wondering what they're talking about. It's obvious to you that Belinda is done for, her entire reputation lies in the volatile hands of Lee Russell. So what could be going on behind that door?
When the three men finally emerge, all is quiet. Neal and Lee usher Haas to the door and bid him a pleasant farewell. You wait patiently for either of them to speak up as they approach your desk, but they're just grinning from ear to ear.
"Well, Y/N. Looks like our efforts weren't in vain-" Lee starts, but Gamby excitedly cuts him off.
"You're looking at your new principals." He says proudly.
"Principals? Like with an 's'?" You clarify, having never heard of an arrangement like this before.
"We're co-interim, temporarily." Lee leans against your desk. His favorite pastime. "He's gonna send some guys to 'keep an eye on things' until they appoint a new principal that isn't that sorry cunt, Dr. Brown."
"So it seems you two need babysitters, huh?" You laugh, teasing them. Just then, the doors open and Haas re-enters.
"Mr. Russell, Mr. Gamby. I need a moment." He leads the two men to the main office, luckily for you, you can hear into that office. It's muffled, but since the blinds are open, you're able to read their lips to make up for what's too quiet to hear.
Haas sits at the principal's desk and exhales a breath of stress. Gamby and Russell quickly take their seats and listen.
"Dr. Brown's situation is... Upsetting." Haas drones on.
"Oh, no..." You whisper, seemingly catching on before the Vice Principals.
"Belinda Brown has taken a job as the neighboring district's high school principal." The news hit the two idiotic men like a ton of bricks.
At the end of their meeting, Lee and Neal usher Super Intendant Haas to the door. They wave him off with reassuring smiles that drop the second he's out of sight.
"We are so fucked, Gamby!" Lee wails.
"Shut up!" Neal barks. "I just need time to think!" Both men beeline for the office. You follow them inside the large Principal's office and close the door behind you.
"What's the big deal? She's not your boss anymore." You ask, perplexed by all the drama.
"She's going to make our lives at North Jackson a living hell! You saw the way she maneuvered that ball game! We're fucked!"
"Calm the fuck down, Russell. We just need to convince her to move cities." Gamby starts working out a plot. "Maybe we head up in her neighborhood at night, fire off a few rounds to keep the property values low." He uses his hand to mimic shooting into the air.
"Mr. Gamby... No..." You place a friendly hand on his, reeling him back from that preposterous idea.
"It's not like Russell's helping us!"
"I am trying, motherfucker!" Lee falls silent again for just a moment. "She's a mom. She isn't gonna want to stay somewhere that doesn't feel safe for her kids."
"Okay, let's shoot at her kids."
"Gamby!" You and Lee both scold him at the same time, shutting him down yet again.
"Let's stage a robbery," you say as a light bulb illuminates above your head. "Get into her house, rough it up a little, and get out. What kind of mother would keep her kids in a neighborhood like that?"
Your two bosses consider your plan, weighing their options. You watch the rays of the sun shift through the multiple windows, time seems to be slowing down in this moment of intense stress.
"That might work," Lee mumbles, already seeming to calm down, relieved by this idea.
"You want us to break into her home? That's against the law." Gamby looks at both of you, disappointed.
"So is shooting at her fucking kids, numbnuts." Lee slings a stray piece of paper at Neal and he swats it away.
"Fuck you, I'm not robbing anybody." The morally confused man stands firm.
"We don't have to take anything, we just have to barely rough the place up and convince her it's not safe to raise a family here. Don't be a baby," you taunt playfully, but as usual, he can't seem to take it that way.
"I'm not being a baby. You're a fuckin' baby. Don't fucking- everybody just shut the fuck up! We'll get in, get out, and never speak of it again, alright?" Gamby essentially relays the exact same plan back to you. You roll your eyes, agreeing just to shut him up.
A few days later, that Friday, North Jackson is to have a game against Belinda's new school, Percival. She's always made it a point to attend every game her school plays, but she will definitely be attending this one.
"Tonight's the night, Y/N," Lee takes his perch, leaned against your desk.
"Tonight is the night, Mr. Russell." You nod sarcastically and charismatically.
"You sure you want to get entangled in all this extremely sexy danger?" He straightens his tie. You laugh at his joke, but mostly you're just happy to see him. Happy to talk to him.
"It was my idea, Lee." You laugh, furrowing your brows.
"And what a good idea it is, darlin'." He disappears to follow behind Gamby, making whatever rounds they've dubbed as their new duty since becoming Principals.
Through no fault of your own, your mind begins to wander. You desperately crave a redo of your night with Lee...
You do as he says, climbing into the bed and waiting patiently for him to undress you. He starts with your shirt, slipping it from your body and tossing it to the side. Next, he makes quick work of your bra, all the while pressing his lips against yours. His soft hands trail softly up and down your body, igniting goosebumps across the planes of your flesh. You moan under his touch and he's amazed to have this effect on you.
He finally removes your skirt and panties before tossing his own shirt to the side. For payday drinks, he's dressed casually. His long sleeve t-shirt that he'd kept rolled up to his elbows had you weak in your knees the first time you saw him in something other than his work clothes.
His jeans barely make it down his legs before you're physically pulling him onto you. He's standing against the bed with you perfectly lined up at the edge. His cock twitches with anticipation as he stares down at you completely splayed open for him to take. His mind is completely blown.
"Tell me what you want, sweetheart," Lee whispers, buzzed with alcohol and lust.
"I want you, Lee. I want you to fuck-" That was all he needed. He slowly slides into you without warning. He's careful, drawing out his stride as he sinks deeper and deeper inside you. Loud, song-like moans pour from your lips as he begins to form a rhythm pumping in and out.
"God, you're so fucking tight," he grunts as he thrusts, tossing his head back as waves of intense pleasure wash over him with each slap of his skin against yours. "Like a fuckin vice grip." You grasp hopelessly at the blankets on your bed, pulling yourself forward so Lee can slam into you harder.
"Oh, god!" You wail, all of your senses magnified by the drinking. The feeling of his fingertips gripping your thigh as he fucks you feels almost as orgasmic as the fucking itself.
"Shh, baby. I know," he whispers with a sly grin, picking up his pace. You release a loud, whining moan before sitting up and pushing him away. He withdraws from you and you pull him onto the bed. Once he's positioned, you climb on top of him, straddling his waist. You rise on your knees and reach a hand down to his throbbing erection to guide it to your needy pussy.
Slowly, you lower yourself onto him, pleasure shooting through you like lightning bolts. You adjust your knees and begin lifting yourself up and down on his shaft. You place two hands on the wall in front of you, above his head, and arch your back to skillfully lift your ass and fuck your aching cunt against him.
Lee hooks his hands where your thighs meet your waist and pulls you so you slam down on him even harder with each thrust. Vulgar sounds of pure pleasure spill from his lips as you ride him to his climax. His mouth hangs slightly open, brandishing his brilliant teeth. His dark brown eyes roll backward for just a moment before he locks his grip on your hips, holding you in place as he fucks up into you at a rapid pace.
"Lee!" You cry, quickly approaching the point of no return. He doesn't let up, and you can't hold back the loud, desperate moans and wails as he fucks you through your high. Just as you're coming down, he slams into you hard. His strides become less than steady and then finally, he thrusts inside you to his hilt and stops. You feel his cock twitch inside you, warmth fills your cunt and spills out down his shaft. You look at him with fear and urgency as his cum drips out of you.
"You don't gotta worry about that with me." He winks, allowing his head to fall back into the pillows, still rock hard inside you.
"Ms. Y/L/N? Are you okay?" Mr. Hayden tears you from your steamy memory and you realize your face is beet-red.
"I'm fine, actually. It's hot up here. Allergies are terrible. I will fucking kill you if you ask me about it again."
"What did you just say?" The man knits his brows.
"I said I didn't really hear you, could you ask me that again?"
"I don't think that's what you said at all..." He walks away slowly.
(There will be one ((or two)) more parts! Coming soon!)
•••
Taglist: @therest-stillunwritten // @its-in-the-woods // @justme12200 // @sixx-writes // @littlenosoul // @itsyellow // @blackwoodtree // @hiddlebatchedloki
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noveltea · 2 days
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The hero was jostled awake by the villain attempting to sneak out of bed. He blinked, eyes still heavy with sleep. "Where are you going?" He asked before yawning.
"Oh, hero. Sorry. I didn't mean to wake you. Go back to sleep."
The hero slid his arms around the villain's waist. "I thought you said you like cuddling. Have you changed your mind?"
"I-uh," the villain sighed, unable to meet the hero's adoring gaze. He pried the hero's arms off. "Listen, hero. I...I don't think this- us- we're not- it's not going to work."
The hero sat up in bed, not entirely shocked, but hurt all the same. "This was your idea," he motioned between the two of them, "you said you wanted this. Wanted me. Why- why is that- I mean, was I that bad?"
"No! Awkward, maybe, but not bad. It's- it's just-" the villain turned away from the hero. "Don't look at me like that. You look like I just kicked a puppy."
The hero hugged the villain's waist again, only to be shoved off. "Why won't you tell me what I did wrong?"
"Nothing! You didn't do anything wrong! That's the problem! I don't- I don't know how to do this!"
"Then we'll figure it out!"
"No! No, we won't! Your heroes will blame me for tarnishing your sparkling reputation, and you'll be ruined. By me. We'll have six good months before you start to resent me. And it'll build and build until we start being passive-aggressive to each other, until eventually we can't stand to be in the same room together. It won't work."
"You don't know that. You don't know any of that!"
"Yes, I do. I've seen the way other heroes look at me. At all villains. We're the scum of the earth in their eyes. I'll never be good enough for you in their eyes."
"Don't I get a say in who I think is good for me? Or do you get to decide for both of us?"
"Oh, please. You'll get over me in a week. The only reason you paid any attention to me was out of pity."
"That's not true! I like you for who you are!"
"And who am I? Huh? Please, go ahead. Tell me how you see the good in me when no one else can. Tell me I'm special. Tell me you can ignore the fact that we're enemies. Because that's it. Isn't it? You're a hero. And I'm a villain."
The hero sat in stunned silence, unwilling to stop himself from crying. He watched teary-eyed as the villain slid out of bed and got dressed. "I'm not the only one who sees it," he managed, "you are good. I just wish you could see in yourself."
"Get over yourself, hero," the villain said as lingered in the doorway. The glimpse he caught of the hero's tearful face almost stopped him, but deep-down, he knew he didn't deserve the hero. "You're only seeing what you want to see."
When the hero looked up again, the villain was gone.
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bertoyana · 19 hours
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funniest thing to #Me about the use of charles' telepathy in charles' and erik's relationship in the prequels is how both of them suck SOOO bad at using it LMAOOOO
like, you'd think having a telepath in the dynamic would actually help things along with the communication, but they are both USELESS at making use of it
charles will use it to crossdress erik and tell angel how much he wants to fuck him and erik will use it to tell charles how much he wants to be controlled, but that's ALL they use it for. it's not even horny or funny anymore it's just SAD, man. they suck so bad at it
(the only time they ever make good use of it is when charles unburied one of erik's memories with his mother, and that's it)
erik just automatically assumes charles knows everything and that he knows WHY erik does the things he does (because charles is in his head, so he MUST know, right?) and charles automatically assumes erik understands the hidden meaning of every single thing he says (because erik is also in charles' thoughts, so he SHOULD know, right?)
(wrong. they are both stupid and they will keep going in circles for 30 years straight)
like. take their first interaction in xma as an example
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(on the other hand, i don't even want to think about the "you are looking in the wrong place" line because it makes me want to k1ll myself in front of the writers)
they are in each other's heads right now, and yet they are not even LISTENING to each other, they are just going in circles because both of them are too wrapped up in erik's own grief to actively try to hear what the other is trying to say. and while you can tell charles is hurting for erik and wants to help him, he's probably not going about it the best way
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also if you pay attention at the start of the scene, when erik feels charles in his mind he just... looks confused, curious maybe, as to why charles is there, but he doesn't get angry or defensive straight away. he just lost his family for the second time (simon kimberg i'm in your walls) so he's probably even welcoming the only familiar thing he still has left.
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he doesn't get defensive UNTIL charles starts talking and just kind of... also starts putting his own foot into his mouth. bless his heart.
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and the thing is, while they get interrupted by apocalypse... being there lmao, i don't think this would have pan out any different if it was just the two of them. as i said, they are not listening to each other. charles means well but he's not really listening to what erik is trying to tell him, and in response to this erik is rejecting any type of help charles wants to give him.
and we know apocalypse was using erik's grief (about magda and nina, about the camps) to manipulate him - *we* as an audience know that, but back in this scene, charles doesn't even NOTICE apocalypse. and this, plus the fact that as we've established, they SUCK at trying to listen to each other and communicate, just brings the entire thing to failure.
(also imagine being the most powerful telepath in the world and being too focused on your best friend to notice the god standing a few steps away from him... which could mean nothing)
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(mind you. they are literally in each other's heads rn. they can hear what the other is thinking and feeling. AND YET)
and it's even funnier (no) how they are even WORSE without charles' telepathy. take as an example, both of their fights in the plane in dofp
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from charles' point of view, erik was the one that left him. erik literally and physically LEFT him in cuba, took the only teleporter there was and left charles to bleed out (lmao). meanwhile, from erik's point of view, he might have left first physically, but he only did so after charles rejected him. so, from HIS point of view, charles was the one to pull away FIRST. when he told him they didn't want the same thing (rejecting erik's ideals and by thus rejecting erik himself as well)
(and charles also let erik to rot in prison for 10 years so he could be also referring to that lmao)
this also brings me to my other point. which is something that i do think is pretty much ignored by everyone, but to be fair, it's also ignored by the movie so,
and it's the fact that the movie establishes that erik has been isolated for 10 YEARS. again, we as the audience know that charles has been struggling for the past 11 years, we know he did all he could for the mutants and we know he's been struggling, and we also know he's been using the serum because he couldn't stand the voices.
mind you, erik doesn't know any of this. not only because he's been in prison for 10 years (and i doubt they let him keep up with the news) but also because charles doesn't tell him any of this (fair)
and the last thing erik said to charles before they parted ways in cuba was that they wanted the same thing, which charles denied.
so from erik's point of view, all that he knows is that charles promised him all those years ago that he wasn't alone, and then he rejected erik in cuba, sent him away, and then proceeded to give up on erik and on their cause by doing nothing when the mutants were being tortured and experimented on. and he started using the serum and living with hank like a normal human being, sacrificing his powers and 'betraying' their cause.
ofc none of this is what actually happened, and *we* know that. but erik doesn't. and for some reason??? that i find extremely hilarious??? no one ever BOTHERS to correct erik's assumption, lmao. also none of this ever comes up again in the movies which to me just means erik went on believing that charles just briefly gave up on their cause for 10 years LMAOOO
okay, moving on bc i still have things to yap about
the other plane scenes comes in. erik shows up with the chessboard, they actually DO talk a bit and erik tells him he didn't mean to kill jfk (can't believe i wrote that down these movies were insane) and then they settle to play chess. AAAND this scene comes in
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and he apologizes for SHOOTING charles, because he never meant to hurt him, and he does regret that. but he's not apologizing for leaving, because, once again, from his point of view, charles left HIM
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and then charles hits him with the most pathetic saddest wettest expectant look in existence (james mcavoy you are insane) because he thinks erik is going to apologize for leaving
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and then erik hits him with this LMAOOO
and charles realizes erik is apologizing for shooting him (something i'm pretty sure charles didn't exactly blame him for? his biggest accusation was that erik abandoned him)
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and you can see charles literally and figuratively backtracking and shutting down immediately AGAIN.
(because, again, charles thinks erik left him, and erik should apologize for that, but from erik's pov? charles rejected him, he pulled away FIRST so he wasn't the first to abandon the other. charles was)
(they both are wrong and right in a way. they also don't tell each other any of this)
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then it's erik's turn to give charles the wettest and saddest look known in mankind, charles shuts down, refuses to even look at erik, he changes topics and erik lets him.
(they never talk about this again, btw)
(it probably blew up in their faces in genosha. i just know they make everyone's life miserable as hell in there . god bless)
anyways, i'm sure someone smarter than me could make a more interesting analysis of how you can tell they do genuinely care about each other, but their failing to communicate properly just brings them to their fall down over and over. especially because it's something that keeps blowing up in their faces all the time in the prequels. something something the failure of telepathy something.
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hello-nichya-here · 3 days
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Hello, whats your opinion on this as a mai fan
I think this person is either misremembering the show or deliberately mischaracterizing what Mai, because what they're claiming she revealed on The Beach is the COMPLETE OPPOSITE of what she actually said.
She doesn't say "My parents used me as a pawn in their game to get close to royals" or "My parents never wanted me to learn anything about combat." She tells us that her parents will let her do whatever she likes - as long as she BEHAVES. As long as she's invisible. Out of sight, out of mind. They don't care what she does, as long as it doesn't affect them, as long as she's quiet. And that's what she says in an attempt to DOWNPLAY how bad her relationship with them actually is and how it affected her emotionally.
When Mai is complaining that she doesn't like Omashu because there's nothing for her to do, her mom doesn't try to talk to her about activities that could keep her busy/entertained, or show any concern about how she's adapting to moving to a whole new country, to a city where she doesn't know anyone. Instead, she ignores her daughter's attempts to talk about her feelings by reminding her that this is important for her father. There's no attempt to make this situation benefitial for her as well, it's all about how she needs to be grateful that someone else is happy about it.
Yes, when Tom-Tom is "kidnaped", they won't stop panicking, and are overjoyed when he's brought back safely. But there's not a word on them being concerned over Mai's well-being when she's leaving in a potentially dangerous mission. They don't show up to congratulate her at any point after she helps the Fire Nation conquer Ba Sing Se, even though that is a legendary feat. Favoritism much?
In book 3, literally the only adults we see in her home are servants, and considering one needs an airship to go to the island where the boiling rock is, it's pretty safe to say her uncle can't be dropping by too often. They let their 15-year-old daughter live in a different country, without any adult acting as her guardian - that's how much they don't care about her.
And speaking of her uncle, yes, he is doing a good job of being an attentive family member (is aware of her situation with Zuko, immediately lets her out of prison the second he knows he can get away with it) - but using that to claim "Thefore her family life is fine" is absurd because, again, that's her UNCLE, not her parents. By that logic, Zuko shouldn't be complaining about his family either, after all he has Iroh and somehow that is supposed to cancel out being raised by freaking Ozai, riiiiiiight?
And speaking of Zuko, there's a reason why, in a finale where everyone is being reunited with their family and friends, even when the travel time doesn't make any goddamn sense, Mai's happy ending involves a heartwarming reuining with him, and he's delighted to see her - but there's still nothing about her parents. Their daughter was sent to prison for life, then her boyfriend became Fire Lord giving them THE perfect chance to come rescue her, and they STILL are nowhere to be found.
For fuck's sake, AZULA showed more love for Mai than her parents did. Girl was clearly happy to see her again, and even gave her a "hug" that wasn't that touchy because Mai doesn't like it. In "The Lost Adventures" we find out that she was also the one who pushed for her and Zuko to get together (though that also ties into her knowing that was the only way to make Zuko come home despite his guilt over what he did to Iroh). Even on The Beach, she's the one who first connects the dots and realizes that Mai is always so aloof because she's used to being told to shut up when she says something inconvenient.
Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not saying her parents had no political ambitions (the Yang comics leaning into that was one of the few good things about his writting). Obviously they were happy that their daughter was best friends with the princess and dating the heir to the throne, and I'm sure Mai didn't appreciate being treated more as asset than as a daughter.
But her complaint was not about that. It was about how her parents are simply not part of her life at all. She's an outsider looking in. She can stand next to them and do as she's told, or she can leave. What she can't do is actually engage with them, mean anything to them, expect anything from them, rely on them at all.
Mai's parents are neglectful to a degree that, in the real world, could potentially have them lose custody of her because she consistently has to turn to literally anyone else instead of them whenever she needs anything.
Is it really any wonder she had a soft-spot for Zuko, aka the boy that is always disregarded by his father, to the point of literally being kicked out of his home, and is actually openly pissed off about it and will let everyone know it?
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polyamorousmood · 2 days
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Hey there :)
So I have no problem with my bf dating other people, and recently hes started having sth with someone else. Good for them! Legit, no problem with that by itself
But.. now I'm being left on read a lot, like majority of the time it feels like, no matter the topic or time. I just feel.. forgotten, I think, or replaced idk. But it feels pretty bad.
I dont want them to think I'm jealous or mad, I just wish he would still show me the same attention/care as before. Ive talked about how left on read makes me very insecure, due to fake friends and person past experiences before so I dont want to bring it up again.. but it hurts. Idk what to do?
Bad news, babe. You're gonna have to say something again. The good news though is that you can productively procrastinate it, because there's some stuff I want you to do first.
But before I get into that, I let having a cool opening distract me from very important other things that need said: That sucks, and I'm really sorry, but you can make it through this.
Now then. Time to productively procrastinate a difficult conversation. Look, I'm procrastinating it more by making it a read more! (It, um, it is A Lot. I took "blogging platform" literally on this one😅)
It sucks. Believe me, it bothers me too when I can't hear from my partner📵📴 because they're with my meta. It has been A Problem I've had to work through, so I think I'm actually pretty qualified to give advice on this.
Some of what I have to say is going to smart (old-timey word for sting) a bit, so I want to make it clear that I understand where you're coming from, so you can trust the part that stings is necessary. I imagine its something like this:
You relationship with your boyfriend is great! So great, you're happy for him to have someone else to love! That's. That's so rare and incredible, its a love beyond what most will know. And then he takes that love and wads it up and throws it in the back seat to make room for this new schmuck. The love is still there, it's just... in the back seat. And you never thought that would happen, because the relationship is so good! And you already said something, so you worry you're being a nag, which you don't want, because you ARE happy for them, you're so happy for them... except when you're not because you can't be happy when he can't be bothered to text you back. Its not really so much to ask, and you EXPLAINED why its important to you, so why doesn't he seem to care? You communicated, you did your part, and it was hard and scary! Surely harder than texting you back would be! And you don't want to feel like this, but. There's this anxiety that... shouldn't he want to text you back? Isn't that how he would act if he really did still care about you just as much?
Any of that resonate? I don't know you, so maybe some of it was way off base🎯, I don't know. But I hope enough of it was close enough to right that you know I get it when I say:
This isn't just your boyfriend fucking it up. This is, in part, probably you asking something unreasonable. To give you the exact same level of time an energy as when it was just you too is a big ask. To be able to supercede his time with the other person any time you want is a big ask. If you're only okay with your boyfriend having someone else if it doesn't cut into your time at all, how okay with it are you actually?
So before you talk to him about it, you gotta step back. Its not that you're wrong for feeling sidelined. But a poly relationship just isn't going to be the exact same as a monogamous one. It it were, I wouldn't have bothered making a blog, and I wouldn't have needed to because I wouldn't have a trail of loving, wonderful, burnt to ashes monogamous relationships behind me. Let's take a deep breath together. Pause here if you need.
Now, there are some questions here that do affect what I think would be fair. For example, if you're living with your boyfriend, and he's taking you for granted, always texting the other person when he's with you, you don't have any special time with him anymore, and then when he goes out its radio silence. That's a very different situation from you being in a long distance relationship so texting is your main form of communication/bonding and now he's got a new person that lives near him so he's with them constantly and now, what are you, chopped liver? for example. I'm going to give a list of things you might be doing that's unfair, and I want you to take a minute and evaluate as honestly as you can where you fall on that. This is a self-reflection, not an accusation, so please resist any temptations to get defensive (if you even feel them). I recommend taking out a pad of paper and committing to an answer for each. Some you may not be doing at all! Some okay maybe a little. And some now that you think about it, yeah actually, you're doing a lot. That's okay. You not handling it perfectly is okay, and doesn't mean we can't ask the boyfriend for accommodations still.
Are you valuing 1:1 time with your boyfriend as much as you're valuing (negatively) the time he spends 1:1 (not texting you) with his partner? IE, are you more bothered by him not texting you than you are appreciative when he takes time for you?
Are you texting him compulsively out of anxiety instead of because you have something more important to discuss?
Are you accidentally infringing on his other partner's time?
Are you trying to infringe on his other partner's time to reassure yourself that you're important to him?
Are you texting him to "test" him?
When you communicated that you didn't like being left on read, did you properly convey how big of a problem it is for you and what your expectations were?
When you communicated, did you allow space for negotiation and to work on the problem, or was it more like a list of demands?
Are you misplacing your feelings somehow? Is there something else that's bothering you that you don't feel comfortable bringing up?
Are you letting your anxieties run you? Is there something you could be doing to address your feelings?
Are you forgetting to weigh other allocations or shows of love he's making or you?
Is there anything else internally you might be overlooking in regards to this?
Whew! Heavy stuff. But you made it!🎉 Now, we'll dig into how his actions are making you feel. That last set was about what you could be doing better, and this one will help determine he could be doing better. But just like we weren't making accusations about you, we aren't making accusations about him either. We are assuming good faith on your boyfriend's part. This is still ultimately about your feelings and what reasonable accommodations could be made for them.
Do you feel the time allocation for you vs his other partner is fair? Why?
Does he seem to text them back more than you?
Does it seem like he's not taking your concerns seriously enough?
Does this issue look like a larger pattern? If so, what? How will that look long-term?
Has he made specific promises he hasn't kept to you in regards to this? If so, what were they and how hasn't he lived up to them?
Do you feel he's made adequate time for you to discuss concerns, or do you feel like he tries to rush through them?
Do you think he gave you a reasonably clear expectation of what him dating someone else would look like (or did he make it seem "nothing will change")?
Has he not responded to something critical?
Is there anything else he's done in regards to this that doesn't sit right with you?
You did it! 🎉Now we can officially start working on problem-solving. I imagine that was a lot more than you bargained for, for such a simple problem as "I want a text back," but its important to get everything laid out. This helps in a lot of ways. It helps guard against striking on a "solution" that isn't actually sustainable. It makes sure you're starting a discussion in good faith. And hopefully, it will help minimize having to return to the issue.
For the sake of formatting, we're going to address the questions for you first, then the questions about him, then how to have the hard conversation, then workarounds that you may not have considered that aren't really your or his problem. I actually think that third group has some of the better "quick fixes", if you can find one that works.
Starting with the questions about what you could be doing better, in order, skip any that don't apply:
Re: valuing 1:1 time -- Make active efforts to appreciate the time you do have more. Use this time as a guard against negative thoughts when he is unable to respond ("We spent all day together yesterday, a few hours today without hearing from him is fine")
Re: texting compulsively -- Be more vigilant about self-soothing. I find self-talk to be most effective for me. I cannot possibly cover everything here, but it sounds like it stirs up fears you're losing your partner. Since you cannot guarantee that will never happen, I find it most helpful to reassure myself I will be okay even if I do lose them. Another option is to make a reassurance bank, where you can store and see evidence of his affection without asking it from him. Your mileage may vary. If you really struggle with this, there's always therapy.
Re: accidental infringing -- Be more mindful of what you send. Save things that are non-urgent to discuss later, when you have his attention anyway.
Re: deliberate infringing -- Stop it. It will only strain things and make the outcomes you don't want more likely. See self-soothing. Find something else to distract you that you can put energy into.
Re: "testing" him -- See above. I know, its easier said than done. Do the hard work. That shit can ruin your life.
Re: didn't adequately express importance -- Well, its a good thing we're about to talk about it anyway! Really think through how you can explain how badly it makes you feel. We'll get into that more when we discuss How To Have the Conversation
Re: list of demands -- Well, its a good thing we're going to talk about it anyway! This time, see it as a negotiation. Ask him if that's feasible, or if its too much. But open to trying alternate solutions.
Re: misplaced feelings -- Take the advice on How To Have a Conversation and apply it to the thing that's actually the problem.
Re: managing anxieties -- Again, you'll have to find a way to self-soothe somewhat. That's not to say your partner shouldn't meet you halfway, but you do have to do your half.
Re: forgetting other expressions of love -- Literally make a list of all the things he's done/is doing for you. As many as you can think of. Add to it often. Pick a couple and do a deep dive on why that mattered so much to you and how you felt. Tell him, too. You gotta be grateful consciously, bro. This applies to all of life
Re: anything else -- Take that into account. Work on that, too, however you can. Be honest with him about your shortcomings when you address it.
A lot of these will require upkeep on your part (kind of mirrors🪞how texting you back consistently requires upkeep on his, huh?). Be prepared to discuss the changing you're going to make and have an actionable plan for them. Okay, his turn, same as before:
Re: fair time allocation -- does he need to make more time for you? Do he need to make protected time that is only for you? You said you feel forgotten, replaced, so maybe this is part of it.
Re: unequal texting -- first, consider why. If he lives with you, he's probably going to have to text the other person in front of you sometimes. If you still think its too much, again, protected time for you may be appropriate, he may need to do a better job keeping his New Relationship Energy (NRE) in check. Be prepared to discuss this, possibly including him defending himself!
Re: not taking concerns seriously -- Well, its a good thing we're discussing this again! Make sure you have an actionable, measurable metric he can do to show you progress here. (IE ❌"I need you to care more" ❌ but ✅"When you're unable to respond, I need you to say that you're busy so I know you thought of my needs" ✅)
Re: bigger patterns -- You will have to tell him you're concerned about those too. If it could become untenable for you, this will probably be a recurring discussion. Consider scheduling check-ins where you say one thing you think is going well and one thing you're worried about, for example.
Re: unkept promises -- here, you are super justified in being mad. Try not to be anyway. Try to be curious and interested in addressing the root problem. Ask him what got in his way, what middle ground he's confident he can manage. It is you and him vs the problem, even here, not you vs him.
Re: inadequate room to discuss -- Set expectations before the talk, and remind him of them if he forgets. (IE "I know this isn't nice to hear, but I need you to let me say my piece and talk through solutions, even if it takes awhile." and "I said I needed to talk through the solution. This sounds nice, but I'm concerned about X. How can we make sure that doesn't happen?") Consider reserving specific time to discuss it, consider reserving recurring time to discuss any problem, if you need it.
Re: didn't set expectations appropriately -- ask. Ask what this would ideally look like to him. If he's having trouble getting started, point out some differences you've already noticed, and ask if he thinks those are the new norm.
Re: didn't respond to something critical -- Establish a way he can see what is critical and what isn't. This might be texting something that can wait, but calling for something important, for example.
Re: anything else -- address that too. Give him a chance to explain himself. etc.
Okay, you've done everything up to this point alone. You're prepped. Now How Do You Have The Conversation?
For this type of stuff, I recommend the WIBS format. That is, "When [something happens], I feel [feelings] Because [explanation] So could you please [change]". But of course, it can't be that simple either. Critically you CANNOT say "you" before the "so could you please". The example I'm about to give is going to use the texting issue specifically, but if you've done the soul searching and found there's a bigger problem you want to address (which ngl, sounds like there might be something bigger based on what you sent), adjust accordingly! This is good general advice for any tough conversation. Anyway, here's what that might look like on the texting thing:
"When I am left on read, I feel anxious and betrayed, because I've had a lot of friendships completely fall apart, and that's always how it started. So could you please make a point to text me something when you read my message, even if its just 'lol' or you saying you want to discuss it later."
But wait a minute! That doesn't include any of the bullshit I just made you do. What the hell am I trying to pull? Okay okay, so we have to modify this a bit. Our new format is going to be something more like this: "When [something happens], I feel [feelings and impact], because [explanation]. I have tried [things you've tried], and I am still struggling because [reason why that hasn't helped, including what you could do better]. So I was hoping to look at some more solutions, like, would you be willing to try [change]." Which might in practice look something like
"When I am left on read, I feel so anxious and betrayed I start spiraling thinking the relationship is doomed, because I've had a lot of friendships completely fall apart, and that's always how it started. I have tried dropping some hints and self soothing, and I'm still struggling because this is a really bad anxiety that I didn't have to deal with before recently and even with the hints I'm not getting the response rate I would like. So I wanted to talk about it and see if you'd be willing to try making a point to text me something when you read my message, even if its just 'lol' or you saying you want to discuss it later."
And then! The discussion continues. Maybe he says "oh my god, yeah, I didn't realize it was bothering you that much, absolutely I can do that" and maybe he says "I'm with you all the time how is this still a problem?" or maybe its "actually, [other partner] gets really anxious when I text, which is why I don't respond unless its important. I figured I could talk to you about dinner plans any time" and whatever the case is, you keep talking until you've set on clear goalposts and have reassurance they feel okay to all parties. So in order, your responses might be something like "are you sure you can manage that? I was really worried by my hints not being picked up on that that was the reason", "I know its a problem. That's why I'm talking to you about it. If that's not a good solution to you, let's come up with something else, because the way things are is really hard on me," and "okay. I don't want to make [other partner] anxious either, but this isn't working for me, can we find something else to try?"
Allow him to explain, be prepared to explain more yourself, and be willing to try a variety of solutions. Acknowledge
Is this my longest post yet? Maybe! Wild. Let's top it off with something easier: The Hack Solutions🧑‍💻. Sometimes, anxiety isn't logical, and goofy workarounds can be super helpful! Here are some off the top of my head, but feel free to get creative, too! Not all of these may be feasible, not all of them may help. But a lot less work than some other solutions so worth mentioning!
You said being "left on read" is what bothers you. Can you just... turn off read receipts? Or switch to a messaging app that doesn't have them? Can he just not read your texts until he has the time to respond?
A lot of phones have a driving mode, that will send an automated reply to texts. Can he turn that on when he's with his other partner so you get a reply like "hey I'm busy rn, but I'll text back later!" and would that help?
If you just want to feel more involved, maybe it would help if he just like, took a picture of his pizza to send to you. Reminds you you're thought of, doesn't require conversation.
Something that I've done with friends is write like, a dozen short affirmations/reassurances, and have them keep them in a special spot. When they need to feel loved, they can take one out to read. This has worked PHENOMENALLY for them, and still protects your partner's time away while allowing you to get love direct from your partner WHENEVER you want.
Can he just kick it with you both concurrently?
Can you have a friendship with your meta where you text THEM like "tell [bf] to text me back real quick" and then your bf doesn't feel bad about texting in front of the other partner because they're telling him to do it?
Classically condition yourself. Like, every time he leaves you on read, eat a chocolate. And then sometimes instead of it being "boyfriend won't text me :(((" it'll be "oooo! candy time!"
ai yai yai! That's all I have, though! Come back if you need help working through some specifics. I'm very happy to help however I can. Its not your fault you're struggling with this. Most polyam relationships have to deal with this to some extent, but with a little effort, you can make it through. Best of luck to you, friend. 💙💖🖤
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eerna · 1 day
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Omg the way Eloise is written as a feminist character BOTHERS me. I can’t always put my finger on why, but a thing that sticks out to me the most is how she just says the most blatantly basic (for us 21st century viewers) things and idk it’s supposed to seem revolutionary… but it’s never clever. And it is never deep.
Anyways I saw your tag on the Eloise/Cressida post and I was curious to hear any elaboration of your thoughts on her feminist portrayal? (But no pressure!)
YEEAAAH EXACTLY! I have the same issue, Eloise just says 21st century equality stuff without ever having read a single feminist pamphlet (this is canon, she doesn't start reading them or attending discussions until she's 18). Somehow she developed a perfectly uniform idea of modern womanhood when she was isolated and raised to be a traditional lady. Her opinions should be WAY more half baked and full of holes because this life is the only one she'd ever known. That's not even mentioning the inability to discuss feminism without discussing class, something Eloise has No Idea About.
Then comes the issue of writing. This is a stupid show. No one looks smart on this show. So when Eloise drops a "smart comment", it is cringe and dumb. She is supposed to be eloquent and witty, but most of the time she looks like a mean snob belittling everyone around her.
Another issue is that everyone else around her is a horrible sexist caricature. Yes, she is snobby, but my god every other woman only cares about men and marriage and gossip so I can't even blame her all that much for it. Her friends don't really care about what she has to say and will always leave her to go chase a man. And even SHE starts fitting the description the moment she falls for a guy - she lies to her friend and puts everyone in danger, and 90% of the reason is a man with only 10% being her self actualization. You can't write a proper feminist if everyone in your story has the same goal, which is to find a husband. It doesn't help that we know Eloise is headed for marriage and babies because every time a character expresses they don't want one or both of those things, they are proven wrong by the narrative.
And finally, my last thing making Eloise a bad feminist character, is that she is SO PASSIVE. Sure, it might be the point of the show as Pen calls her out for it, but we still don't know if they are gonna fix it so I am putting it here anyway. She only talks and complains about her lot in life, but never acts against society. I was happy when she started sneaking out and hang out with The Working Class Feminists TM, but that turned out to be a short failed romance subplot instead of a character moment and she gave up on it almost right away, so it doesn't count. And now in s3 she decided to embrace society and its expectations, so I am not sure we will ever get to see that kind of rebellion again - I sure hope so! But idk.
As a "well written Eloise" character, I'd like to suggest Felicity Montague. She is a character from a 18th century romcom, a noble lady, aroace and trying to go to med school when her gender prevents her from getting an education. She doesn't use her screentime for long-winded monologues about the unfairness of the world, she ACTS on her thoughts and opinions so we know what they are. She switches covers of romance books and textbooks so she can study without being bothered, she runs away from home to try make her dreams come true, she finds alternative solutions. Her thoughts are never lauded as One Truth, in fact she is often called out for the blind spots in her opinions since she too grew up a sheltered noble and can't account for all experiences. She is surrounded by women who challenge her ideas and make her into a better friend and person. AND she is funny and reading her is just plain fun. You CAN do a feminist who doesn't belong in her era, you just have to be careful to also make her a good character.
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Text
Haunted: Part One
Pairing: Spencer Reid x Female!Reader
Word Count: ~1.7k
Summary: This is Hotch's first case back since being stabbed by Foyet. As much as he says he's fine, he's not and he's letting his emotions affect the case in a negative way.
Warnings: canon violence, canon language, canon talk of death, methods of kill
Author’s Note: I do not own anything from Criminal Minds. All credit goes to their respective owners. If there are any warnings that exceed the normal death/kills from the show, I will list them.
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"One need not be a chamber to be haunted, one need not to be a house. The brain has corridors surpassing material place." - Emily Dickinson
Spencer isn't used to not being able to do things on his own so helping him get ready for work is a challenge.
"Will you stay still?" you say and grab his pants. 
"I can do it. Give it to me."
"Spencer Walter Reid. Stop moving and let me help you."
He freezes at the mention of his middle name. No one knows it but you, apparently.
"How did you...?"
"I've seen your driver's license. Now sit down and give me your leg."
Spencer sits on the edge of the bed and stretches his bad leg out to you so you can pull his pants on. It's been a month of recovering from both Hotch and Spencer. This is going to be his first day back since getting out of the hospital, and you're not sure how this is gonna go. It could either go horribly wrong and he'll need to take more time off or he'll be back on his feet. Emily wanted to pick Hotch up and drive him to the airport even though he'd been cleared to drive on his own.
With no unit chief in the office, you have a few minutes to yourself so you and Spencer head to Penelope's office to hang with her until Hotch comes in. Spencer hobbles into her office and she pulls up a chair for him.
"Thank you."
"Does it hurt?"
"It really only hurts when I think about it, which is pretty much all the time."
You place your hands on his shoulders from behind and massage his muscles gently.
"Don't worry, I've been very good at distracting him." Penelope laughs as Spencer looks at you with a smile on his face. You lean down and kiss him Spiderman-style. It's becoming one of your favorite positions to kiss him. When you pull away, you rake your fingers through his hair. "When are you gonna let me braid your hair?"
"Never," he says playfully and pushes you off him. Penelope has a box of cookies on the table, and he reaches to grab one but she slaps his hand away and slaps the lid on it. "Hey!"
"These are for Hotch," she says and puts a bucket of lollipops on top of them.
"I get shot in the leg and I don't get any cookies? You know he's gonna hate the attention," Spencer says and grabs a lollipop.
"It's cookies, not cake."
"He's probably gonna pretend like nothing happened," you state.
"Well, it doesn't mean we have to."
"I think maybe we should."
"I don't roll that way."
"I've been thinking about the entire time I've known Hotch, I don't think I've ever seen him blink," Spencer says.
"I know. It's weird."
"It's classic alpha male behavior."
"Do you think he stared down Foyet?" Penelope asks fearfully.
"Yes. I saw it. He didn't go down without a fight, that's for sure."
"Do you think he stared the whole time, like with each stab?"
"Yes."
"Is he okay?"
"I wouldn't be, but I'm a blinker," Spencer says, and you kiss the top of his head.
The door opens and JJ walks in with files in her hands.
"Spence, Y/N, there you two are. Grab your go bag."
"What's going on?"
"Turn on the news."
Penelope turns on one of the news channels that's talking about the most recent crime your team is going to investigate.
"Just after eight this morning, forty-year-old Darrin Call, a lifelong resident of Louisville, assaulted customers at the pharmacy on the corner of Main and Truxton Avenue. Eyewitnesses saw him walking east on Main Street minutes after the attack. He has not been seen since then. He was wearing a blue shirt, jeans, and a light-gray jacket. Within the hour, the Governor has called in all sources for a manhunt. Despite these statewide efforts, the suspect has eluded law enforcement. The body count is rising. Three are confirmed dead including an armed bank guard whose gun was used in the attack. Another two remain in critical condition. The assailant is still out there. We are going back to Eric Jennings who's been talking to residents of Louisville residents."
"We're going to Louisville."
"Alright. Bye, Pen."
You get up and escort Spencer out of her office over to his desk. You grab both yours and his bag since he can't carry his own and use his crutches, and you two head out with the team to the airplane. Spencer takes the couch to rest his leg while you take one of the chairs surrounding the small table.
"Our point person in Louisville is Lieutenant Kevin Mitchell," JJ says.
Just then, Hotch and Emily walk onto the plane, and you immediately feel anger coming off Hotch in waves. He has a stoic look on his face like always but the anger is stewing deep down inside him. It's a calm anger and it's all for Foyet.
"Good morning," Hotch greets.
"You look well, sir," Penelope says over video chat.
"Thank you. How long do you have that?" Hotch asks Spencer about his crutches.
"I'm not really sure. Welcome back."
"Thanks. Any other attacks?"
"No, not yet. Call's proven hard to track. He's never had a driver's license, so he's most likely still on foot or public transportation."
"No, he's not gonna take the bus. His face is everywhere," you shake your head.
"Has anyone found a stressor?"
"He just lost his job," Penelope explains. "He's worked at a factory since 1990 making appliances and not a single promotion."
"That's a long time to be bitter."
"Yeah, he's of the hermit variety. As far as I can tell, he's got no one. No wife, no kids, and no parents."
"Nothing to live for. Why hasn't he killed himself yet? Sprees usually end in suicide. If he's got nothing to live for, why hasn't he ended it?"
"He's not finished yet," Spencer answers Hotch. "We know he has displaced anger. He took it out on the first victim."
"The stock boy represents someone. We need to know who. Is he military?"
"No."
"He's lashing out for a reason. This guy's got anger, endless targets, and a gun. He's just getting started."
When the plane lands, you go off with Derek and Hotch to the crime scene at the pharmacy while Spencer and JJ head to the police station to get set up. Lieutenant Kevin Mitchell is waiting for them as soon as they walk in, and he's eager to get started. Before your team landed in Louisville, he created checkpoints on the state's lines at both the I-64 and I-65 and within a twenty-mile radius downtown. They think he's still on foot.
Take into consideration the average walking speed of two and a half miles per hour, and it's been just under three hours, then that adds up to an approximate eight-mile radius. First responders started a hard-target search of businesses and residences within that eight miles, and you're going to join them.
The lieutenant dug up all he could on Darrin Call but didn't find much. Me and Rossi are at his apartment so they might be able to find something the police couldn't. The strategy in all of this is to determine where he's headed next in order to stop him. Most spree killers are outwardly aggressive, and Darrin isn't that. He's defensive even if the video doesn't immediately show it.
You watch the video of Darrin over and over again until you see it. Darrin isn't aggressive until someone touches him. That's what set him off. It happens before he stabs someone. He hates being touched which is a trigger for him. 
He never meant to hurt these people, and he never went in there with a weapon. JJ is working with the media to inform them as soon as she possibly can. Darrin's apartment is a five-minute walking distance from the pharmacy but there is no sign at his apartment that he came back to wash off the blood, which means he's still bloody and walking around town like that.
Penelope says he doesn't have any family, so where is he going to go looking like that? He might be messy in the head and in his everyday life, but his apartment is really neat or maybe he's military or hospitalized which means he has the same routine every day.
However, today is different. He killed three people. Why did it change?
The energy left at the pharmacy is astounding. The energy is breaking off into different streams as if it's panicking. Darrin isn't right in the head and he is definitely going to hurt himself sooner rather than later. He's going to piss off the wrong person and get hurt.
"Hotch, he's losing his mind. His mind is tearing itself into pieces. This energy is being pulled apart." Hotch stares straight ahead without giving you any indication that he heard you. "Hotch, did you hear me?"
"Yeah," he nods and walks off.
Hotch isn't okay. Who would be after what he went through?
"Mr. Call was always so quiet. He's been coming here for years," a woman talking to Derek says.
She is the pharmacist responsible for giving out medications to people.
"Has he ever had a run-in with the stock boy?"
"I can't see why he would. John was new here. I waved him over. I didn't know what else to do. No one else was helping."
"He didn't turn violent until you gave him his prescription?" you ask.
"It wasn't his. It was somebody else's. I just wanted him to calm down."
"JJ's press conference is in five minutes," Hotch says when he joins the group.
"Hotch, we might have something else here. Why didn't you give him his own medication?" Derek asks the woman.
"He didn't have any refills left."
"For what?"
"Alprazolam, but he used to be on Thiothixene."
"He was on an antipsychotic?" Hotch asks.
"That's why I wanted him to calm down. He's been off his medications for about a month now."
"When were you gonna tell us this? He's armed and delusional. Who's his doctor?" Hotch asks angrily.
"I don't remember. My computer..."
You turn to see her computer had been damaged in the fight.
"Great," Hotch scoffs and walks off.
"I'm sorry."
You and Derek look at each other because Hotch is completely out of line for this.
"He's not listening to us. I've seen this kind of behavior before. He's not going to want to listen. Not until he catches Foyet." You two walk over to Hotch. "Hotch."
"Call JJ and tell her about the meds."
"This is not her fault and you know it."
"Morgan, he's in a psychotic break. It changes everything."
"Do you want to talk about this?"
"No! I want to find him!" Hotch sighs in frustration and pulls out his phone to call Penelope. "Garcia, he's been off his antipsychotic for a month. What else did you miss?"
"I'm sorry, sir. I didn't get his medical records yet, so--"
"Find them. Find everything."
"Yes, sir."
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