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everythingsinred · 9 months

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Let's Talk About NatsuMikan: Mikan (pt. 39)

I'm sorry. What lies ahead is more of a rant than anything else. It's not required reading in any case. Feel free to read if you want my take on the specific reasons why this ending is so lackluster.

We've come really far to get here, though! If you've read every part of to this, that is CRAZY. I think it's crazy someone would write so much about this, and I was the one who did it. Maybe we're both crazy.

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Chapter One Hundred and Seventy-Eight

Time to meet Mikan! A second-year high school student living in a village near the ocean who lives with her grandpa and a strange bear. She has two friends who don’t seem to wear the uniform. Her life is simple, from the outside.

But she is a person shrouded in mystery! Even to herself! She has lost two whole years of memories due to an illness she had as a child. In her mind, she suddenly went from being in the fifth grade to entering middle school, which must have been jarring for her. All she knows is her grandpa, an ever-present bouquet whose flowers never wilt, and a teddy bear who came with a letter from a mysterious sender, whose name has been redacted. But this bear is not a normal bear! He is animate and can move and clean (and beat her up). The strangest thing is that it only moves in front of her and her Jii-chan. Mikan’s reputation in the village has been affected by this strangeness in her life. She is viewed as being an odd girl, a bit of a space case.

Mikan is the crazy girl in the village. I would have loved to see more of that...

It seems Mikan has always been a weirdo. I speculated at the start of this essay that Mikan didn't always fit in with kids in her village, and it seems that's still the case now. Where Mikan thrived was Alice Academy, where she was surrounded by fellow weirdos, where she made amazing friends and bonds that would last forever.

Despite the bear’s strangeness, she is very close to him. He’s a part of the little family she has with Jii-chan.

Mikan may be a strange girl surrounded by strange things, but she is an optimistic and cheerful girl who likes to look forward to every new day.

At the end of the school day, Mikan’s teacher warns his students about mysterious disappearances and suspicious people in town. All of the victims seem to be girls Mikan’s age, so the police warn against teen girls walking by themselves. Mikan finds this situation strange since their town is so peaceful and idyllic, and doesn’t seem like the place for a string of kidnappings. The teacher freaks out and insists on Mikan paying attention, shaking her by the shoulders and telling her to take care of herself or else he’ll have to watch over her 24/7… which is gross. Get away, Mikan!

Seeing her get harassed isn't enjoyable though. I hatE her stupid friends. Gross. Creepy. Unsettling. One of her friends is a grown man in disguise. I want to rip his head off.

Mikan leaves school crying after that ordeal and her friends just laugh it off, teasing her for being the teacher’s favorite and what bad luck that must bring. I don’t find it funny but nobody asked me! In any case, her friends write off their teacher’s concern because of Mikan’s cuteness, which she seems to love hearing.

Clubs and afterschool activities have been canceled because of the kidnappings, so we have a sense of how dangerous these events are.

Someone calls out to her on their way home--a boy who wants to talk in private. Her friends muse on how many guys confess to Mikan despite her “common” looks--and I must reiterate again how important it is to me that Mikan is not some drop-dead gorgeous model like Nobara or Hotaru are clearly made out to be. Also her friends suck. They figure her mystery might be attractive to boys, and that might be true, but I think her sweetness and bubbly energy might also play a role.

He does indeed confess to her and Mikan apologizes, citing her ignorance in the world of dating. She thanks him for liking her but turns him down. Her rejection of him is not personal at all, and thus wholly non-offensive. She doesn’t seem uncomfortable or put off by his affections, and I think that might soften the blow of her rejection a little.

Her friends scold her for turning him down, since he’s smart and in a prestigious club, and Mikan concedes that he did seem cool, but that she won’t date for anything less than love. They continue to bully her for rejecting him when love comes after dating, and Mikan sees their point, especially because she hasn’t had her first love yet, but she is sure, somehow, that she did love someone during the time she lost. As a result, whenever she talks to a boy, no matter how impressive or cool he seems, she always compares him to that feeling of love she still carries with her, for a person she doesn’t even remember.

Ah, the consistent endurance of love. The question of whether love is something that can be forgotten or whether it becomes a function as natural as breathing or digestion. For Mikan, it seems to be the latter. She remembers that she was--is still--in love with someone, and dating carries no interest to her if it can’t compare to that feeling.

The love is certainly not past tense, either, because she still feels it--an ache, a pain, a lonely feeling. She misses this person.

There's potential here but no follow through. What we get is just endless disappointment.

They stop by the ocean and Mikan relishes the moment, always happy to see the sea, as if she is watching it for someone else too. She recalls feeling that way watching the snow fall, looking at the sky, feeling happy like she was watching for somebody else, and then explicably crying, unable to stop. No matter what she does or experiences, her heart is pulled to that love.

And what do I think of all this?

It’s pretty confusing, the way it’s written. It’s no secret I fucking hate these chapters, and there’s a lot of reasons, but this scene is something I can’t relish in because it can be read a few ways and I can’t help but feel like I know which is the way Higuchi intended it.

It’s pretty clear from the blurry panels of forgotten memories that Mikan is thinking of multiple people as she stares into the ocean, thinking of Hotaru as she stares at the snow. And yet, this whole monologue of hers seems to be thinking of one person. What does this mean?

Well, primarily, I think Mikan’s amnesia mixes the love up, and I feel l want to believe that’s narratively intentional, that Mikan loves and misses many people, but can’t parse out that fact. Instead it feels like she just loved one person that much that everything reminds her of a love she can’t remember.

In my opinion, this love is varied, because she loved a lot of people in different ways: friends, family, Natsume (who has always been different). I think she is put off by romance because of her enduring romantic love for Natsume, but it’s not only Natsume that she thinks of when she sees the ocean. Mikan loved so many people and now she misses them, all the friends and teachers and classmates and family she met and lost. It would make sense then that amnesia!Mikan might look at the moon and think of Natsume, or at the stars and think of her mother. Maybe she hears a violin and misses Sumire, or cries whenever she studies because she wishes Yuu was there--all without actually remembering the person, just the love. As a result, because she knew and loved so many people, she would get reminded of that love whenever she does anything.

What puts me off about this is the rest of this arc and the unproportional emphasis on Hotaru. I already hate the choice to have Hotaru save Natsume so her fate hasn’t actually been sad to me for a few years now--just deeply annoying and pointless. I am of the opinion that Mikan entering the academy was a change for her, that she was a weird girl in her old village, who didn’t have many close friends until she met Hotaru. Then she went to the Academy and was able to make many friends with people who loved and accepted her. She finally found somewhere she belonged.

These ending chapters, thus, should have been about her enduring love for everyone, how the bonds she made at the Academy were impossible to forget. Instead, the reunion with Natsume and her entire class is condensed to one chapter--and very little of it is pleasant--with the entire final chapter being about Hotaru, as if to make the point that despite all of the love Mikan gathered and gained, Hotaru is still the person she loves the most, and by a huge margin, almost to the point where her other loved ones don't really matter at all.

AnyWAY, the kidnappers have found her and Mikan is terrified and confused. A mysterious explosion seems to save her from the kidnappers, and when she looks through the flames, she can see the silhouette of a person in the distance, a silhouette that makes her heart beat faster. She instantly becomes overwhelmed, because now it’s not just external events confusing her; she’s confounded by what’s going on inside of her head too.

On the other side of her, another man knocks the kidnappers out with his hand powers. And that makes her heart beat too. But Mikan assumes her discomfort around this new man is because he must be part of the kidnapping group.

Reminding myself that this is a ship essay and that Higuchi gave me a couple crumbs to work with... There's just not even enough to make a crouton with.

Then it turns out Shi-chan is actually Goshima in disguise and if you aren’t touched or particularly interested in this redemption, join the club! The “Goshima has been by Mikan’s side for years, protecting her” idea means absolutely nothing to me when it all happened in one condensed chapter, when he’s been seen bullying and even physically hurting her in his girl disguise, and when I never really cared about Goshima as a character to begin with. Too little, too late, too weird. I find this off-putting, actually. Whose idea was it to trust Goshima with anything after he’s been established to not be trustworthy, just for the sake of giving him a chance to “redeem himself”? For all the nonsense about Mikan having to forget everything just in case she gets targeted by enemies, they sure did take a huge risk letting Goshima anywhere near her after he knowingly caused her mom’s death.

Anyway, Mikan is overwhelmed and confused, because her close friend just turned into a man and there’s a lot of weirdos around and they’re talking about stuff she doesn’t understand--

And then she bumps into someone as she’s backing away, someone who instantly grabs her hand and pulls her closer.

Chapter One Hundred and Seventy-Nine

Her heart beats fast again, and for some reason, looking at this guy makes her think of that feeling of love she had mused on before, how she somehow knows she was in love before. Somehow, just looking at him and touching him, makes her feel like this stranger knows her, makes her feel something strange and yet unbearably familiar. She knows she’s felt this before--

The potential of this! It's almost interesting but it only lasts three seconds, so who cares?

The stranger gropes her chest.

But of course he does! This arc SUCKS! There’s so little good about it, why would the NatsuMikan reunion be any different??? I am ANGRY. I HATE this arc, not even joking. I’m not exaggerating; I genuinely hate this finale.

Anyway.

She starts freaking out--understandably--that this stranger, who made her feel feelings she was sure she wouldn’t find with any of the other guys who confessed to her, felt her up out of the blue for no fucking reason. She starts screaming for help but he seems unbothered. All of the strange men seem unbothered, actually.

Then, to make matters even worse, three new weirdos arrive. I don’t know why they thought it was a good idea to ambush her with so many strange people at once, all of whom are men, right after she’d been almost kidnapped. They talk about and at her without her knowing them and it’s uncomfortable. If you think I only dislike Natsume’s first actions with her here, you’re wrong! All of it is thoughtless and inconsiderate.

Who thought to themselves, “Y’know there’s a string of alice-related kidnappings near Mikan and she’s been warned not to walk by herself because these are predominantly male attacks on young female victims her age, so we should make sure to save her with an all-male team of suspicious characters who are sure to act strangely and frighten her”? Because whoever did is a fucking idiot.

Why am I surprised though? It’s one of the teachers for sure, and the Academy staff hasn’t impressed me much this whole manga.

They seem to know her name and talk about her like they’re familiar with her, which only freaks her out more. She lays eyes on a blond person who is supposed to be handsome and princely according to her thoughts (but I always despaired about how the finale boys look more than twice the age they’re supposed to be and are bizarrely broad).

But they all voice the same sentiment that the blond boy brings up: they have missed her and wanted to see her for a long time. They’re going to take her away.

Mikan considers this: a group of strange men appears at just the right time to save her from kidnappers, and they claim to be friends from a time she has forgotten, and now want to take her away from home.

She starts to run away, horrified, because obviously these guys are also kidnappers!

She despairs about why her life has to be so messy and mysterious, just as that gropey guy jumps in front of her to stop her from escaping. They make eye contact and the build-up here is that something drastic might happen, that she wouldn’t be off-base if she assumed he’d attack her somehow.

Instead, she is embraced by this stranger, and she’s taken aback by the sudden and uncalled-for sweetness. Until he starts screaming at her that he isn’t about to let her go. He says more cryptic stuff about searching for her endlessly, about how it felt to wake up without her, how hard he had to work to stay alive for this moment, that she shouldn’t have forgotten him.

And poor Mikan can only stand in his arms and listen, overwhelmed but undoubtedly touched somehow.

“Even if you have forgotten your memories, and the alice stone you had back then, you are mine.”

Mikan starts to cry, remembering that she had once been in love with someone, that she had turned down every guy who approached her because no matter how cool or handsome they were, they could never compare to that feeling of loving someone so much--a feeling that she only feels in this stranger’s arms.

Ahh...

Without understanding why, she hugs him back and cries in his arms, thinking about how she feels with this crazy dude she just met, her entire body overcome with electricity, with the “painful intensity of love.” Yes, love, for someone she just met. Love, for someone she’s loved for a long time, even though she’s forgotten him.

Because even though his name and face and all the memories with him have been forgotten, the love she has for him has never budged.

She cries and hugs him until her attention is drawn to his pocket, where something is flickering. He pulls it out to show her, a little pebble. He puts it in her hand and it is instantly resorbed, and WHOOSH!

She starts to cry. Because she remembers everything now! Just like that!

It’s almost as if having her lose all her memories two chapters ago didn’t actually MEAN ANYTHING! The lack of build up to this moment, the all-over-the-place quality of these chapters… it just doesn’t feel as exciting as it should.

It all just feels pointless. Or at least it does to me. Like. What was the point?

She says Natsume’s name as she cries, instant relief at being able to see someone she was sure she would never see again, someone who had maybe even died. Yet here he is, right in front of her, alive. She has recovered her memories so now when Natsume hugs her again, it’s not out of the blue and she instantly reciprocates.

Insert witty or sappy comment here.

She is then greeted with an onslaught of “What about me?” and “Do you remember me?”, which she answers in the affirmative for all.

This whole scene is pretty rushed and unsatisfying but Mikan has a happy reunion with people she loves and now remembers.

Chapter One Hundred and Eighty

I don’t relish analyzing these chapters because I hate them. There isn’t much to analyze, really, but there is a lot to critique and I don’t like being negative about Gakuen Alice, so I prefer to just ignore these chapters whenever I can. In fact, most of the time I'm able to forget these chapters enough that they don't feel like a part of canon at all to me, giving me the opportunity to consider alternate and better endings. I like very little that is offered here. These chapters just piss me off, and that sucks because I set out on this essay because I knew that the manga has so much to offer in terms of intelligent story-telling and this ending just messes it all up.

It is apparently a miracle that Mikan has managed to regain her memories, even if it’s a small portion of what she’s lost (and that feels pointless too). But Mikan is sure she didn’t cause the miracle, because she heard a voice when she resorbed the alice stone that wished she’d regain her lost memories. That girl’s voice set off a big wave of memory, apparently. So it wasn’t even the alice stone.

Apparently, even though she was surrounded by people she loves, nobody’s voice or appearance unlocked any solid memories, but Hotaru’s disembodied voice does? Now, I don’t like that at all, personally, because to me it seems antithetical to Mikan’s character and undermines the love she has for everyone else, both her romantic love for Natsume and her platonic love for her friends and family. This last chapter irritates me so much, in fact, because it seems to be making the point that Mikan doesn’t just love Hotaru the most, but that she loves her so much more than everyone else, and those kinds of revelations being shared openly in front of everyone else who loves her just rubs me the wrong way and gives me a gross feeling.

I find it hard to picture that Mikan’s love for the others couldn’t even come close. It’s stupid.

I'm so mad. Mikan, didn't Jii-chan teach you any manners? What the actual fuck would make you say something like that in front of all these people who love you? That's so annoying. This chapter is not canon to me, I'm sorry.

She even says she “always loved that person more than others” IN FRONT OF EVERYONE ELSE AROUND HER. All these people who have been missing her and waiting to see her, and she just says “I love someone else way more than y’all!” like it’s no big deal!

And that’s why I dislike the scene in 178, where Mikan talks about her overpowering love for one person. Because to Higuchi, this isn’t an amalgamation love thing, it’s focused solely on Hotaru, implying that sure, maybe Mikan is happy to see all her friends again, but the person she’s cried over and missed for all these years is just Hotaru. It sucks, man.

Mikan was a lonely person before she went to the academy. Sure, she went to chase Hotaru, but there's so many bonds and relationships she built while at that school, with teachers, with classmates, with her upperclassmen, all people who impacted her and changed her and made her better. People she cried about leaving, people she didn't want to forget. People she was willing to lock herself in a labyrinth to save, people she would have put herself in danger for.

This final chapter says those people don't matter. The only person who matters or has ever mattered is Hotaru. It makes me feel gross, because that's not the story we've been reading.

Anyway, they all fill her in and Mikan has to deal with Goshima, who murdered her mom, and we have to watch yet another moment of her blindly forgiving someone because holding grudges is bad! Then again, Mikan apparently doesn’t even remember her parents, so her forgiveness isn’t entirely informed by actual memories or feelings, just the general vibe that Goshima is nice now and shouldn’t feel bad about murder anymore.

You're a creep, Goshima! Who the hell would trust you, that doesn't even make sense! It's not "mercy", it's stupidity. Let him prove himself in some other way, not with the duty of protecting your niece, the daughter of the woman he killed. All of Shi-chan's actions are ten thousand times worse when you keep in mind that was actually a grown man.

“Everyone needs to smile!” and just get over whatever bad stuff happens, I guess. If someone wrongs you, you have to forgive them, or else you’re just being a negative nancy!

SHE EVEN ENDS UP APOLOGIZING TO HIM for not appreciating how much pain HE was in! I HATE THIS ENDING SO FUCKING MUCH.

“Let’s just forget about it!” I hate this ending.

There’s absolutely no attention paid to pain, to suffering, to abuse. There’s no respect given to characters like Natsume who underwent horrific trauma at the hands of abusive teachers, a character who might not feel as inclined to forgive as Mikan is. There’s no appropriate time spent considering these feelings. There's no care here. Instead, Higuchi’s narrative implies that bad things should be forgotten and you should in fact apologize to those who wronged you for not realizing they’re in pain!

(I actually did reference this in ATRAD, so if this seems familiar, that’s why. I put a lot of emphasis on Luna and forgiveness, and Mikan’s feeling as if she should forgive because that’s what she’s supposed to do, and what would bring happiness to everyone else. I specifically talked about it because of how much it bothered me in the manga.

“Well, Luna and I were talking about the past issues here.” Kuonji gestured between the two girls. “Now, Mikan, we all know that what Luna did was horrible. Luna knows better than anyone that it was wrong. She’s talked to me about it and I think it causes her more pain than it does you, knowing that her actions caused you pain.”

“She tried to kill me,” Mikan muttered.

“Now, imagine how she feels, knowing that?” Kuonji said gently. )

I feel no desire to talk about this boring information that gets dumped on us all of a sudden in the last chapter. What’s the point? It’s irrelevant. This is the LAST chapter of Gakuen Alice and it’s used as an information dump to justify the nonsense that’s happening, that undermines everything else. What’s there to analyze?

Whatever.

It's a combination of things. I hate Hotaru's role in this end. I hate Mikan's behavior in this chapter. I hate that nearly every page in this chapter is text heavy and loaded with new information that has no place in a finale. I hate that nothing matters. They all deserved better.

Mikan is reminded of Hotaru’s name and she has a little breakdown trying to get why that name is the only one on her heart (WHAT???), when she meets even more people--including Shiki, and she’s told that Mikan is crucial in the efforts to find this Hotaru person. Mikan is again brought to tears when she hears Hotaru’s voice wishing her a happy birthday, recorded on mushrooms that Ruka has kept all this time.

Mikan is then given a choice: to leave with these people as a quasi-Alice, to help save Hotaru, or to forget everything again and go back to her normal life.

The fact that anybody is concerned about what she’ll choose is fucking stupid.

It’s not even a choice. Obviously we know what she picks.

But her reasoning is for some reason entirely about Hotaru, and saving Hotaru, when all her other friends are standing around her hoping that this isn’t the last time they see her. THIS PISSES ME OFF.

She then meets all her other classmates all at once. Randomly. It’s rushed, it’s not heartfelt. It feels like things are being done just to finish them. The only thing of any value is the memory that Mikan wanted to see the ocean with everyone when things at the Academy become better. And it looks like things are better! So they’re all together at the beach! Yay! I don’t care.

It’s time to go on a trip to save Hotaru! Right away. Like right now. And even though Mikan is reuniting with everyone she’s loved at the Academy, the only one who actually matters is Hotaru for some reason.

I remember looking through the raws of this chapter when it first came out and the empty, stirring feeling in my stomach. The lack of interest I had in anything that was happening visually, the huge bubbles of text, the presence of way too many characters. This should go without saying but I didn't actually read any translation of this ending until years after it came out. I've probably read these final chapters 3-4 times total since they came out. They're just not important to my experience of this story at all.

Do I like Mikan chasing after Hotaru at the end just like she did in the beginning? Hmm. No. I hate it. I hate Hotaru saving Natsume for Mikan’s sake. I hate Hotaru being stuck in time-space. I hate Mikan acting the exact same as she did in the first chapter, as though she didn't grow or change at all, as if all the love she’s gained with other people doesn’t compare at all to her love for Hotaru, downplaying how much everyone else means by a lot. I hate the open-endedness. I hate that none of the reunions hold any weight and none of them make me feel anything, not even the NatsuMikan one.

ME. I don’t feel ANYTHING in these chapters but annoyance. I’m the kind of person who cries just thinking about Pengy or Natsume and Ruka’s backstory. I cry all the time. I cried watching House almost every episode. I cried watching the lamest romcoms known to man. I cry everytime I watch a true crime documentary and everytime a mom says "I'm proud of you" to her kid on TV and everytime I look too long at my cat. I cry about fucking EVERYTHING. And Higuchi didn’t make me feel fucking anything with the finale to her manga.

I’m sick and tired of these chapters. They’re not canon to me. They feel disrespectful to me and annoying and I hate them. I prefer Kageki, or even better--imagining an entirely different ending, particularly because of Mikan. Anyway.

It’s no secret, I think, that I hate the GA finale. I am not a big fan of the way Natsume’s death was resolved, or how Ruka’s arc was left hanging open, or how Hotaru got trapped in space time. I don’t like that everything that happens to Mikan in the end doesn’t even matter, that everything in the ending is pointless and results in no change, no development, no consequence.

I’ve said before that I personally can’t write unhappy endings, but I can sometimes cope with them in other people’s stories if that’s the best resolution for the characters. GA is a strange example of an ending because it wanted to have both a happy and unhappy ending, which just resulted in it being a meh ending at best (and excruciatingly irritating at worst). The ending insults all of Mikan’s non-Hotaru relationships and all the readers who liked them. The reunions are all rushed and thus none of it makes an emotional impact.

The worst part, in my opinion, is that the chapters leading up to this finale (so the last couple dozen) aren’t much better because they lend a hand to this. Character arcs are the most important part of a story’s narrative in a work like this. This manga has been incredibly well-written up to this part, particularly in regards to most of the main four having well-defined arcs. There’s three types of character arcs, I think:

Character evolution would usually refer to any kind of change, but for the sake of clarity, for this, I’ll use it as a positive change. Think of a character who has trust issues. Character evolution would mean that he eventually starts trusting in people. The story would climax with his trust in someone being tested and him choosing to trust anyway. That’s what character-based storytelling is all about, fulfilling someone’s character arc by addressing their faults and obstacles.

I’ll use the term character “devolution” to refer to a character arc where the character has a negative arc progression. Technically, this is character evolution as well, just of the negative variety, but for clarity’s sake I’ll call it devolution or deterioration. Let’s say, there’s a character who just wants to protect her younger sister. Over the course of the narrative, her actions become more and more drastic and she does increasingly atrocious things in the name of protecting her sister until she’s become something akin to a monster, maybe even the story’s villain. A well-written character arc does not have to be focused on positive change.

The last type of character arc would be… none. Some characters are called “static” which means they stay the same throughout the story. The story isn’t circled around testing them or pushing them into developing. Characters like this are more involved in challenging other characters.

I think Hotaru is more or less a static character. She becomes a little more open with her emotions, sure, but the little changes she makes are almost imperceptible on a narrative level. If you look at the individual arcs and think about Hotaru’s actions, she rarely plays an active role. She is usually a catalyst for Mikan’s actions, or a strong supportive role. It’s what her character does best because that’s just what static characters do! I don’t think there’s much wrong with characters like this, and people use “static” as a negative term way too often, but I strongly believe Hotaru would make that same sacrifice for Mikan in chapter one that she makes at the end, which makes the action less potent. Mikan’s desire to be able to sacrifice comes from being inspired by Hotaru’s sacrifice. Hotaru doing what she’s always done as the climactic action in the manga sucks out all the narrative potency from the ending when there’s two characters with unresolved arcs. Hotaru would have worked best in a strong support role here, and I think it would have been more meaningful to have Hotaru chase Mikan rather than the other way around again.

I’ve seen that referred to and praised as some kind of narrative bookend or parallel, but to me it always felt lazy, like there was no real change to Mikan or Hotaru’s characters for all of these almost two hundred chapters. It rubs me the wrong way, and maybe that’s because I’m focusing too much on character arcs and narrative, but hey! That’s what I was trained to look at in college, so I can’t change this about myself.

Exhibit B is Ruka, who I think was pushed to the side unceremoniously and whose arc was completely ignored. Yes, I did mention character devolution. It’s possible that a good arc for Ruka would look like him being faced with the opportunity to save Natsume and, despite his very best efforts, not being able to, or even making things worse inadvertently, suddenly feeling like he’s received proof after all these years that he truly is a burden. That’s a sad arc progression, but it works narratively. It would seem strange in a work like GA, which tries to be positive, but it works. But he didn’t get that. Ruka is too easily escorted from the action, from the climax, entirely sidelined. Ruka’s arc is pretty clear--what his biggest issue is and what he needs to change about himself in order to live a successful life is painted for us from the beginning. He’s not static like Hotaru, especially because his character arc is brought up multiple times in multiple arcs and he makes a little progress each time, as a way to tease a huge event on the horizon where he will be fully confronted with his burden complex. He is not given this opportunity and the spotlight is ceaselessly handed elsewhere, making his character inconsequential when it comes to Natsume’s death. A spit in the face.

The only character whose arc seems perfect to me is Natsume’s, funnily enough, but only to an extent. Natsume dying for love is perfect for him, and I believe that ending his arc any other way wouldn’t be as meaningful to his character. This has been set-up from the beginning, almost as if fate has commanded that he would die no matter what changed in his life. And that’s great because we see him change his perspective from Chapter 16, when he’s happy to kill himself, relieved that his suffering will soon be over, into his eventual death, where he can’t accept that his life is over because he doesn’t want it to be. He does everything he can to save Mikan, but ultimately when death comes for him, he doesn’t really want to go. That’s PERFECT! The thing that ruins it is Hotaru rescuing him for Mikan’s sake. Natsume’s martyr complex throughout the manga reveals to us just how little his existence means to him. He always comes dead last to himself and what he needs is other people choosing him first and making him feel like his life is significant and means something other than what he can do for others. Hotaru saving him puts his actual existence dead last. She doesn’t save him for him, but because of Mikan. Hotaru doesn’t really care about Natsume, so when she saves him, it reinforces the idea that Natsume exists for other people, that all he’s good for is what he can give. The absolute WORST part of that is that Higuchi Tachibana didn’t even think of that. There’s no evidence that this story choice wants to explore what that means for Natsume, how that choice would impact everyone involved. The carelessness and sloppiness is what bothers me here, that Natsume’s nearly perfect arc is tainted by the fumbling effort to put Hotaru in an active role that doesn’t benefit her character arc, that negatively impacts everyone else’s arcs.

And then there’s Mikan… Who I believe was done pretty dirty. Mikan had a clear character devolution. She goes from being a generally upbeat but still emotional girl, capable of sadness and anger and who doesn’t let herself get treated poorly, who generally wants to be useful, to contribute something, to be able to sacrifice things. The sacrifice part got a lot of focus throughout, and whenever she gets the chance, she throws herself at it. The best part is that Mikan doesn’t so much “make the choice” to sacrifice as she feels it’s the only thing she can do. There is no alternative to her because she doesn’t even think of it. It’s only when she’s confronted with Kazumi giving her a choice at the end: save Natsume or keep your alice, that her sacrifice feels like a personal choice rather than an instinctive action on her point. Honestly, Mikan has always been a character motivated to do good, so her arc is less about learning to do good and more about realizing that she does do good already. Additionally, she has the abandoned nullification alice arc, where Mikan feels like her alice is completely useless, like it doesn’t benefit anybody. But there is one thread that has tied to that throughout the manga, from the very first arc, and that’s Natsume. If Natsume was always meant to die, Mikan was always meant to save him. That’s clear from the start, when Narumi says “There might be someone out there in need of your alice” over a panel of Natsume. It was as much a part of implicit destiny as Natsume’s death, as the two of them falling in love. And that was specifically in terms of her silly nullification. Her nullification should have played a role here, and the fact that it didn’t annoys me. I don’t like Mikan having the stealing alice at all, we been knew. It completely dismisses the nullification alice from her storyline for no real narrative reason. Mikan having the stealing alice doesn’t really do much for her character. It acts as a plot lubricant, as a tie to her mom, but for Mikan’s existing arc--nothing.

There’s the fact, too, that Mikan saving Natsume would have communicated to him that his life means something, if only it means he lives. That he doesn’t have to give anything, as long as she can have him breathing. It would have meant so much for both of their character arcs. It would have been the pretty, perfect way to tie it all. I know there’s a lot of focus nowadays on “subversive” story telling, on setting up one story only to turn it over with some contrived plot twist for the sake of shocking the audience. “You thought this would happen, but you’re stupid for thinking so, because this is happening instead!” I think that kind of plot doesn’t act in contribution to character arcs, which is actually the only thing I care about. In a story like GA, character has been central, so it should continue to be. To me, Mikan being unable to save Natsume feels stupid and pointless, not in a “sometimes you fail” kinda way, because Mikan has already been taught that lesson. That would hit harder, maybe, if Natsume did die for real here, if he never came back. It would be sad, but it would be potent and meaningful. Instead, Natsume can be saved, just not by her. She is incapable of doing the one thing she was set up to do from the start. Instead, her role is stolen by Hotaru and the act of saving Natsume is no longer an act of love for him, but an act of love for Mikan, which is just insulting to all the characters involved.

Ultimately, how can this finale make you feel anything if the characters have been abandoned for the sake of a lazy “bookend” of Mikan chasing Hotaru once more? All the arcs were abandoned in favor of servicing a sloppy and rushed ending, where no character gets the attention they deserve. The finale just does what it can with the resolution it’s been presented with, and that’s why it sucks so bad. Three chapters isn’t enough to clean up the mess from the last twenty or so chapters, but it doesn’t even try.

I think the last chapter is the worst chapter in Gakuen Alice, hands down. But it’s only made possible by the subpar story told prior to it, specifically about Natsume’s death, which is the climax of the story. That climax is deceptive too, because you cry so much--about Natsume dying, Mikan leaving, Hotaru sacrificing herself, Ruka being left behind by everyone he knows--that you don’t even notice how bad the writing is! And all the stuff that’s making you cry is cheap character ploys to make you feel in the moment without giving you an actual conclusion. GA isn’t just open-ended because Hotaru is still missing; Mikan, Ruka, and Natsume are still missing character arc closure.

And considering how intelligent the story-telling has been up to now, it feels out of the blue and unfair to have such an awful ending.

What a disappointment.

Palate cleansing NatsuMikan to soothe your soul after you had to read all that nonsense and negativity. Sorry about all that.

Conclusion

Yeah, so like i said: a rant. Tomorrow I'll wrap up all of this with a little touch on Kageki, but there's not much to analyze there because NatsuMikan aren't focal.

I'm sorry if this was very negative. Like I'd mentioned a hundred times already, it's hard for me to be negative about GA. I don't like whining or complaining and staying butthurt about an ending that was published more than ten years ago feels unproductive. If anything, I take it as a learning moment. I use this to teach myself how vital endings are, and how not to do them. I also generally don't think of these chapters at all. I sometimes flat out forget the story ended this way until someone reminds me.

In my head, the character arcs are resolved and Hotaru never got lost to time-space because that's stupid. I have quite a few alternate endings in my head, but I prefer all of them to the one we got.

Thanks for reading, folks! Just one more time and then we can move on with our lives and go back to pretending this manga is perfect.

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#gakuen alice #alice academy #ga #sakura mikan #mikan sakura #natsume hyuuga #hyuuga natsume #my meta #ga meta #ga meta: nm #ga meta: manga #ga meta: manga nm #let's talk about natsumikan #let's talk about natsumikan: mikan #nm: m song of the day is....#idk. lover by taylor swift or smth #tbh i dont think of these chapters with any song bc theyre not on my brain most of the time #but lover IS on our playlist... but for alternate better versions of the ending where natsume (and others) matters to mikan at all

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siennaditbot · 7 months

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Been in a very visual novel/otome game/dating sim mood lately.

Started with Tears of Themis, got worse with this one Xiao x Lumine one on Itch.io, got even worse by some non Genshin related ones on the same site (Project Blue and Blooming Panic, eugh, I'm feeling sappy), and now I've been replaying one I got in 2015 I think

Too bad it's Amnesia:Memories.

I used to love the anime cuz, eugh, the character designs were so extra and I was like 16 and deep in the anime hole. Also Shin is so pretty and he's all black and red lol. I even made several Shin themes for my browser lol. These designs are so cursed btw. Thigh high boots, everything's ripped and the whole outfits probably take like hours to put on lol. Kinda cool but dumb.

I remember not being too happy with the game, though, and it took me until now to realize why.

Back then I only got 1 out of 5 good endings. Kent my beloved, no wonder I have fond memories of only him lol.

Going in again my main thoughts were "Shin's mean", "Toma's creepy and crazy", "Ikki's gross" and "don't care about Ukyo" buuuuuut

I still think Shin's mean, but now I kinda get it. He also softened in the good ending so I'll let it slide, but his constant boundary crossing makes him a bit iffy. And, unsurprisingly, I love his voice. Tetsuya Kakihara might always sound the same but eugh I love him anyway.

Toma freaks me out, can't trust him on any route. He literally puts MC in a dog cage cuz he's too overprotective. It's resolved in the good ending, but it's crazy enough for me to not be able to get over it. He's also a freak on Shin's route. Some might be into the yandere stuff but eh, not my thing.

I wanted to quickly get through Ikki's route before going for main man Kent, but turns out I actually really liked Ikki. Kinda worried that he might end up being my fav lol, I'm a sucker for the "playboy actually falls in love" stuff lol. Positively surprised.

Can't wait for Kent next time. I think he was a silly little math nerd who blushed a lot. Iirc he makes the player actually solve math problems lol. That's the way to my heart apparently xD Oh, I like his voice too, Akira Ishida. Not one of my favs but still.

Had to stop for tonight before starting Kent's route, and I finally unlocked Ukyo's, too. He seems like the meta guy (like Seven/707 in Mystic Messenger) and he pops in on every route talking about how "you probably don't remember me but be careful" and sometimes goes a bit crazy but I'm definitely interested to see how his good ending goes. Probably gonna end with me crying and wanting to hug him to make things better lol

Might even go for some of the bad and normal endings afterwards, who knows. Gonna ruin all the good vibes immediately xD

Anyway I don't think anyone's gonna read this but hey, it's there for those who might go through the game's tag soooo suffer!

#amnesia memories #otome game #visual novel #dating sim #blooming panic #project blue #shin #ikki #toma #kent #ukyo #SDB rambles

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papas-milferia · 9 months

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So like, no need to post this if you don't wanna lol, it's been a bit since you talked about it but I only saw now

But Bea is so funny to me cuz. Yeah she's the Roy Mpreg comic person which like, honestly just that by itself wouldn't even be that bad, like maybe I wouldn't have her blocked if that's what she was

Hell I ended up doing stuff of similar caliber (except I didn't post it in a place where people can find it against their will <<33)

But. The fact that she ignores the teen status of so many characters is so infuriating and creepy

And as I heard about the way she harassed people and just like, making people uncomfortable in general and like

Idk, maybe if she wanted to have a better status in the fandom, she should stop liking softcore porn of papa louie minors on twitter and like, if she has that little social awareness or social capabilities, then like. Idk, check in w people if they're feeling comfortable w what she's saying, instead of like... Whatever she was doing, like- it's SO easy checking in w people and not liking softcore minor stuff on twitter, I am doing it so well!! So does many damn people in this forsaken fandom are able to do it

At least it doesn't feel like a loss to me in a way cuz I always thought her art looked kinda gross and also just like. The moment I saw her confession thingy of Roy where she basically headcanons him to be sexually harassed by old men, or just men in general, Idk, my memory isn't the best

Tho I do wanna add I don't like her art style because of the absolute non diversity of it, like she draws like 3 different shapes, bimbo boobs, femboy and slightly less femboy w abs and that's kinda boring as hell honestly, and the body types she draws like, they don't even look that good to me, each time I remember how she draws Peggy it makes me so sad and just like, damn, she deserves better

Sorry for the essay, just wanted to express my thoughts to someone cool who like, handles this stuff similarly to me

i'm glad you think i'm cool in handling this lol. tbh i just take shots at bea unprompted bc she makes it so easy (she's a fujoshi, the jokes write themselves), and she harassed me, my friends and my ex in the past so i feel i kinda deserve it.

anyway yeah she's just. weird. i actually had a long discussion about this with someone in dms recently, but everything she says leads into another question or topic SHE wants to talk about and she doesnt seem to really have the social awareness to understand when ppl are uncomfortable or want to talk about something else. her art is bad, which isnt a crime. it's just funny. the colours make my eyes bleed and everyone has an hourglass figure and massive bulges. she made a drawing tutorial on how to draw roy Her Way, which again is fine, it's just hilarious to me because she just keeps saying ''draw roy as a skinny twink with thick thighs and make him an uwu dork!!!''. i wont post the tutorial bc that feels mean and she can draw any character any way she wants.

i rag on her a lot for being the roy mpreg person but here's the kicker right. i LIKE mpreg. i will admit it, i have looked at mpreg art myself because i enjoy that typa stuff from time to time. but it's bad mpreg. idk who her audience is, but it isn't freaks like me i'll tell ya that.

#when ppl with weird fetishes (me) dont even like your mpreg comic you've fucked up bea. you've fucked up !#asks #should i make a tag for talking about bea. i dont want to have one because then it's gonna seem like i regularly talk about her #and that makes me wanna throw up

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insomniamamma · 1 year

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🌻 If you get this, answer with 3 random facts about yourself and send it to the last 7 blogs in your mentions, anonymous or not! Let's get to know the person behind the blog 🌻

3 random J facts....

I was fascinated by biology when I was in high school. Particularly anatomy. This probably sounds gross and creepy but I LOVED dissections. I loved the precision of it, getting to see how things worked. Honestly, I took Advanced Placement biology because I wanted to dissect more things. I had one biology teacher who absolutely loved me and showed me how to preserve specimens in rubbing alcohol. The AP teacher not so much. She told me to my face that she thought I was going to end up being a serial killer. OK, why the fuck are you teaching and AP Biology class if people being interested in anatomy freaks you out?

2. I have a BFA in Illustration, which I have never been able to do a whole lot with.

3. Avocados are my favorite snack. I buy them whenever I can get them for under $1 each. A little salt and pepper and I just scoop that bad boy out with a spoon. When my son was just starting solid foods i'd split one with him. I think he enjoyed smearing it around more than eating it tbh.

#lovely ask #ask games #random j facts

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monstermaster13 · 1 year

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TftW: Don’t Call Me Freak

Sometimes it doesn’t pay to bully those who are weird or are different from you, and today’s villainous protagonist certainly will learn that lesson. Stephanie Hadingham was a former school rival of Nathan’s, she was a manipulative and controlling diva who wanted things her way and when she didn’t get that, she berated and berated until she did.

She never believed anything Nathan said and viewed him as a freak just because he wrote transformation fiction about Dan Aykroyd or rather about being him, of course she didn’t know that it was a bad idea to do that. ‘Nathan is targeting me on my account just because I liked one post that says that people that believe in the supernatural are freaks. It staggers me that this person is a huge part of the Aykroyd fandom and he ruins it with his

“Nate are you going to stand for this?”

“Of course not, time to take out this trash.”

Nathan rolled his eyes…’I’m not even the main part of the fandom, dummy.’ ‘But you are ignoring the part about attacking me based on a post I liked.’ ‘Does that even matter? Why do you even hate me anyway? It seems all you ever do is whine about how i’m fetishizing John Belushi and Dan Aykroyd by wanting to be them.’

“Which you do, you do that…’

‘Oh…I suppose you think that your trashy taste in men justifies your reason for attacking me, then?’ ‘But you seriously do some not normal insane things, you fetishize poor Dan and John by fetishizing them and writing about them in a way that sounds like porn.’

“Really? I should be so lucky if I get that good.”

“Are you even listening to me?”

“No, I figured that if you are going to keep on like this..”

‘You what? Are you going to fetishize me like you did to two very real people? Because don’t act like you don’t that, I have been raised on Deviantart and all the weird fandoms, you so want to be them and it is totally gross and shit. Do you think Dan would like this if you met him IRL? Uh no, he’d think you’re a creepy and not normal, fans don’t do what you do, not normal, freako, freako, eeew!’ ‘Really? What? Haven’t you ever seen the Changed, FNF, Madness Combat, or Guilty Gear fanbase? Those guys are pretty fucked up, even worse than I ever could be.’

“So…that doesn’t matter, what you do isn’t right.”

‘You think you can speak for what Dan likes and doesn’t like? That’s cute, he’s not yours, you cannot make him do whatever you want, that’s something I establish in my work, I don’t claim I am him, or that I can control him. Also…the man is a weirdness magnet, he slept with a ghost once, he had dreams about mutant babies, he has seen actual aliens and ghosts, i’m sure one little story wouldn’t be enough to weird him out.’

“What? How dare you…”

‘How dare I..what, question you, yeah i’m questioning you. Trust me, you need help more than I do.’ ‘But you don’t belong in the Aykroyd fandom. You’re not normal.’ ‘Well you’re a freak yourself, nobody is normal, nobody knows what normal is. In this world if you cannot put up with the strange and unusual, you’ll just have to change to fit it.’

“What does that mean?”

“You’ll find out soon enough.”

Nathan’s eyes gave off an ominous glow as he chanted, his chants began to echo in Stephanie’s ears, which made her squirm a little. ‘How are you doing that?’ ‘I have actual supernatural powers, don’t you remember?’ ‘Uhhhh…’ ‘Of course you do. But be glad that i’m not as horrifying as what is about to happen to you.’

Stephanie attempted to get answers out of him but he disappeared before she could, only to run into a rather nasty surprise an hour later. An hour later while waiting for her boyfriend to call her, she found herself entering what appeared to be some kind of combined asylum and therapy building.

Looking around she could see a koala-girl doctor with green hair…’Hello, Stephanie. You must be my next patient, I am Doctor Eucalyptus. Now my friend tells me there is something wrong with you.’ ‘There’s nothing wrong with me, i’m a normal person.’ ‘Not from what Nathan has told me, Nathan says you were bigoted to him for being an Aykroyd fan that is different than normal fans. He also told me you think that supernatural beings are freaks.’ ‘Well they are.’

Eucalyptus hit Stephanie with her notepad…’What was that for?’ ‘Trust me, just be glad I don’t have any weapons with me. Now there is a term for what you have, what you have is Extreme Hypocrite Disorder.’ ‘I don’t have any disorders.’ ‘Oh yes you do and you are in denial of it.’ ‘Stop this..’ ‘I won’t stop this just because you told me to, I am the doctor here and unless you want me to use your internal organs to make lunch meat for the asylum’s cafeteria, you better listen to me.’

“I must be dreaming.”

‘You are not dreaming…you’re delusional. Here, let me show some of the other patients.’ The koala-girl showed Stephanie down a hall-way of patients she had encountered before. One patient was a male who thought they were Martin Short despite not being them, and one thought that they were a reincarnated god.

“I’m not like these people.”

“Oh yes, you are.”

‘I don’t belong here…’ ‘Oh but you do, let me help you, help you to get rid of that disorder you have.’ ‘This is going to get horrifying isn’t it?’ ‘It doesn’t have to.’

She attempted to try and make a run for it only to run into a couple of members of the hospital staff, the staff in this case all being Dan Aykroyd characters. ‘Aykroyds? So many Aykroyds.’ ‘Oh yes, they’re all ours..and I treat them better than you treated Dan to be honest.’

The Aykroyd characters saw Stephanie and began to chase her around the hospital, Dr Eucalyptus smirked as she saw what was happening. ‘Now now, don’t run away from these guys, they only want to help you, and so do I. You act like you don’t want this but yet you do, sounds like you’re jealous.’ ‘Jealous of what? You? You’re a freak, just like all of these people.’

“I may be a freak but I am trying to help you.”

“I don’t want your help, I want out of here!”

She screamed and then tried to pull out her phone, as she pulled out her phone she made a call to her boyfriend. ‘Thomas, baby doll..could you come here and get me out of this hell hole please? I am begging you, please come and save me.’ Unfortunately for her the message she got was…’Thomas cannot reply to your message because he is currently unavailable.’

Stephanie screamed when she saw Thomas with a nasty looking gash on his neck, looking like someone had just slit his neck as he collapsed on the floor and blood dripped down from it. ‘My boyfriend!’ ‘He is doing just fine.’ ‘No he’s not, someone must have killed him.;’

Dr Eucalyptus chuckled, watching as she attempted to get away. ‘I need to find a way out of here.’ She tried to pull the fire alarm level only to get covered in blood, and it was real blood, not special effects.

A couple of patients popped up from behind her and she attempted to convince them to follow her. ‘Come on, let’s get out of here.’ ‘Why? We belong here and so do you. We work here too.’ ‘What? But you’re supposed to be like my mutuals.’ ‘Join us, it’s not so bad.’

She screamed several times as the patients swarmed around her, she attempted to hit one of them with a chair only for Eucalyptus to intervene, she chuckled and smirked. ‘I didn’t think it had to come to this but it’s for your own good, since you won’t let me help you, i’m going to have to fix you myself.’ ‘Fix me?’

“Oh yes, you are very broken, and you need to be fixed.”

“No I don’t.”

Eucalyptus chuckled as she floated over to Stephanie….’Now now, it won’t hurt, at least not in the way that it will mentally scar you or anything, don’t be afraid.’ ‘Why shouldn’t I be?’ Her eyes gave off a supernatural glow as she turned into a tall demonic version of herself with a tail like the one scorpions have complete with a stinger.

She hit Stefanie with her scorpion-like tail, knocking her out before dragging her down-stairs into the lab, with the Aykroyd characters following her. Tom Everett, Austin Milbarge ,Elwood, and Grocer were helping her. ‘You’ve brought us another subject for the experimentation process.’ ‘Indeed I have, boys. Boys, meet Stephanie. She has Extreme Hypocrite Disorder and needs to be fixed.’

“We can do that.”

“As can I…I figured since this one loves Dan so much, how about she becomes him?”

“Oooh, that is such a clever idea.”

The koala-girl placed Stephanie on a table and turned on a machine of sorts which binded her in place, she chanted as dark supernatural energy entered her body, Stephanie squirmed and tried to break free but before she could, invisible needles were jammed into her arm, which caused her to yelp in pain.

She then saw what appeared to be brown hairs growing on her arms, as her arms broadened, the hairs were on her hands too as her hands enlarged and her skin matured, a ring popped off one of her fingers and shattered on the floor as she screamed. ‘What’s going on? My ring…my boyfriend got me that one as a gift.’ ‘Oh you won’t be needing that at all.’

“What?”

The changes spread through her body as a couple buttons on her top popped off while her chest and torso broadened, her breasts retracted into the former as hair grew on her chest and stomach. ‘Aaaw no, not my figure, how am I going to be attractive to my mutuals, if I don’t have my figure?’ She groaned as her stomach broadened and her hips retracted in size, as her privates altered into the more masculine variant.

There were a couple of crunching sounds as her back and shoulders broadened and she slowly grew in height to 6’1, her neckline altered while her hair darkened a little in color and shortened, as her shoes burst open while her feet enlarged, two of the toes sticking together and giving her the appearance of having webbed toes. She felt her face as it altered, her forehead growing a bit as her brow altered and her eyebrows thickened, her left eye turning from blue-ish to greenish while the other turned brown, giving her heterochromia. ‘I’m a monster…’ ‘Why yes, you are. You are indeed a monster but you’re getting better.’

She groaned as her nose broadened and developed a cleft in the middle of it, she felt her rear plumping up a little…’Oh yes, the sexiest part of turning, Eukie definitely thinks so too.’ Of course she didn’t need a mirror to see that she was turning into Dan as her features morphed into an identical copy of his and her voice altered, deepening and contorting, developing Dan’s signature voice and tone.

“There we go, it’s a success.”

“What have you done to me?”

“Well since you love Dan Aykroyd so much, we’ve turned you into him.”

‘You monster, this isn’t fair, turn me back or else.’ ‘Or else what? You’re going to talk about it to your friends, calling me insane?’ Eucalyptus sneered. ‘I am seriously going to do that.’ ‘Nobody is going to believe you, not your friends, not your family, no one.’

“But…”

“Why would they believe someone who they don’t even know?”

Stephanie attempted to berate Eucalyptus for what she had done only for Eucalyptus to chuckle. ‘Aaaaw i’m sorry, but I cannot take your empty threats seriously when you look and sound like Dan. You just sound so cute when you try to be tough.’ ‘What?’ ‘Oh yes, come here you, Dr Eucalyptus has special huggle treatments just for you.’

A sinister smile crept across Eucalyptus’s face as she got closer and closer to Stephanie before stretching her arms to inhumanly long lengths and pulling her or ‘him’ in this case in for a hug. ‘There there, it’s okay, I know this sounds like i’m torturing you but I am doing this to help you, and clearly that old persona of yours was way too annoying and stubborn. So I fixed that a little too.’

“What do you mean by that?”

Stephanie pondered what the koala-girl meant by that but as she or ‘he’ did, she realized that she partially had been given half of Dan Aykroyd’s personality and mannerisms. ‘That’s what I meant by fixing you, you are much nicer like this.’ She was still herself but now she was a lot nicer and she realized what she had done was a mistake. ‘I am sorry I acted the way I did.’ ‘There there, you’re all better now. But there’s two more people you have to apologize to.’

Just then Nathan appeared next to someone who appeared to be another doctor, but the doctor pulled at his face like it were a mask and revealed himself to be the actual Dan Aykroyd underneath. ‘Danny?’ ‘Yes, Stephanie..I heard about what you said. I appreciate that you were thinking of me and all but you were very selfish with me,I am not yours to be controlled, nothing and no one can control me, physical, spectral or otherwise.’ ‘I realize that I have been selfish. Sorry Dan, I should have let others have you too because sharing is caring.’ ‘And what about me?’ ‘Oh alright Nate, I am sorry for insulting your tastes and your stories, I realize now that some people actually do enjoy these sort of stories and that is perfectly fine.’

“There you go, all is better now.”

“Thanks.”

Stephanie/Dan left the hospital and she/he left a much better person as Doctor Eucalyptus smiled. ‘Ah, another happy patient. I love my job.’ She hummed to herself as she went to go and check on another patient. ‘You did a good job Dr Eukie.’ ‘Thanks.’

After she went back to check on another patient, the scene cut to a Tales From The Crypt style bookend of Dan Aykroyd as a horror host. ‘Well then, did you all enjoy this story? I did. Nathan certainly got what he wanted in the end, poor Thomas finally got to know how it felt to be a real pain in the neck but at least he got to appear in the final CUT.’

Dan laughed at his own horror related pun as he held up Thomas’s head…’And also I really got to HAND it to Doctor Eucalyptus for her absolutely top tier treatment of her patients.’ He picked up a severed hand and waved it around for a little bit. ‘You will be happy to know that I have picked Stephanie to be my substitute whenever i’m unavailable, and she does a bang up job, nobody even knows she used to be female. That’s Dr Eucalyptus for you, a true miracle worker. She no longer has anything wrong with her attitude or her head…I think you’ll find she prefers this as opposed to how she used to be, and she learned her lesson. Remember, be careful how you simp. Because some of your mutuals may not agree with you, in fact that you’ll find that the only thing they mutually agree on is that they want you dead, or just to have your head on a plate in general. But don’t worry, she gets to keep hers. Oh don’t you just love it when someone gives you head and lets you keep it?’

He did a Cryptkeeper-esque laugh as he looked over at his table of heads in jars including the dad from The Suicide Shop, the Rankin Bass version of Dracula, the Child Catcher, and Ed Grimley and even one of Martin Short in general. ‘For now we can relax, but there are more stories to come, and of course with more stories come more ways to bring the scares and to teach a lesson they won’t so forget. So I hope you’ll come visit again next time for another special bedtime scarytale, of corpse I will always be here to tell them.’

Doctor Eucalyptus laughed…’I love your horror related puns, Dan.’ ‘Thanks Eukie, and thanks for letting me be the host for this end segment, you really do an amazing job.’ ‘Coming from you Dan, it means a lot.’

Dan turned to give one more speech…’Remember, simping over a famous person or character is alright, just don’t be too rabid about it because there can be dire consequences to your actions, and also remember it never pays to be a hypocrite, if you attack others, expect them to do the same to you…and leave you in…pieces. And look, here are some pieces of someone now. Any parting words? I didn’t think so. Then again, kind of hard to keep your head straight when you’re all in pieces anyway. But nevermind, hope tonight’s story provided you with some real top tier screams. Good night, and don’t let the monsters bite, or rather do…because they might find that you taste good!’

“Oh absolutely.”

‘And one more thing, be careful about who you call a freak in middle ghoul, for they might turn out to be the one that leads you to your undoing and of course, you probably won’t even have a leg to stand on, at least not anymore you won’t.’ He gave one more Cryptkeeper-esque laugh as his bit ended and thus so does our story in general. Remember, simping over a famous person or character is alright, just don’t be too rabid about it because there can be dire consequences to your actions, and also remember it never pays to be a hypocrite, if you attack others, expect them to do the same to you…and leave you in…pieces.

Not everyone has to conform to what is normal, fandoms in general tend to always have a crazy one in the bunch, and if there isn’t one, chances are, you are that one, but don’t worry I am sure Eucalyptus and Dan both know where you can get a head check. You’ll come in as you were, but will come out a totally reformed person. If not, you’ll be a total different person in general when you come out.

Kinkshaming others for their specific quirks can definitely lead to dire and horrifying consequences, so be careful what you say, or you might yourself in your very own scarytale with an ending that is definitely twisted in so many ways.

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fuckgabe · 2 years

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This is going to be random because I haven’t written anything of substance on here for a minute. I had an incredibly vivid dream last night that’s been stuck to the back of my mind all day. This is more for me to look back and laugh at at a later date or reflect on how dumb my mind can be.

So basically in my dream I was at a party in these strangers house/abandoned restaurant. There were booths, a couch, a fire pit and a bar top(just random shit). The crowd was like 20 people if that. The lights in the building were that creepy, low, fluorescent blue which made everything feel ominous. So I’m chillin and respecting the party vibe, listening to what I’m assuming was gospel-rap arranged by Sophie, and I’m drinking this mint drink (but it’s red)when someone violently grabs my shoulder.

I’m turned around and it’s fucking John, which freaked me out (because I haven’t seen or heard from him since his shit show Halloween party last year). He starts getting loud talking about how could I embarrass him like that and saying that he had something important to tell me. I start shouting back and I’m crying these gross tears that feel like honey.

There I am confessing how I felt about him to his face. He keeps trying to interrupt, and at this point we have like the whole party looking at us. I attack him about how fucked up it was to treat his “best friend” like she was trash, how I hated the way he put himself down, his stupid crazy obsession with wanting to wrong people who wronged him, and ultimately how I just couldn’t stop thinking about him. Because deep down I do still feel madly in love with him. Nothing about is made sense. We came from two different worlds and never would have met if not for Tinder. By the time I get to the last part, everyone is in a circle around us but they’re facing away, and John is like slowly fading away. I told him how jealous I was every time he talked about other guys, and how he was ducking stupid for not acting on the time he talked about having a crush on me because I was too pussy to act on it either.

I finally end up taking a deep breath and see my knuckles were all dirty like I fell on the ground or something. Then John starts talking in Spanish but I understand like the gist of what he’s saying. Something about he has to tell me something important still. So I get quite but then his body did a little pop and he turned into little stardust.

I woke up after that and felt so shitty. Like we ended things on bad terms for no reason because we were both trying to make each other jealous. Which is stupid as fuck because we both talked about hating those kind of people. It’s crazy how I kept replaying this dream over and over in my head and how I just wanted to text him to tell him hey or something. I’m glad now that I deleted his number and unfriended/unfollowed him everywhere because I’m not the kinda person to look back at the past. Maybe it’s a fault or something i have but if things were meant to work out they would’ve but they didn’t and the pain just reminds me that it actually happened. I’m just grateful it happened at all and for a brief moment I had a sense of completion.

Where ever you are homeboy, I hope you feel completed. 🪢

#personal #me #dream

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fortuositywritings · 3 years

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Love Bug (Wanda x Reader)

Summary

So when Peter is bitten by a spider, he gets cool superpowers; but when you’re bitten by one, you get loopy and say things you never meant to say.

“I can’t get your smile out of my mind. I think about your eyes all the time. Beautiful but you don’t even try.”

Word Count: 5688

Warnings: None unless you count someone fainting and mention of spider

*********************

“That is freaky.”

“Come on, you’re impressed. Just say it’s impressing.”

“It’s impressingly freaky,” you say tapping on the glass of the container that holds Peter’s new tech. “Stark really took taxidermy to the next level.”

“Relax. It’s mechanical. It needs a name. I’m thinking ‘RoboSpider’,” Peter says enthusiastically as you are both watching the metallic spider crawl in its container. It looks so real. It’s creepy.

“That’s a stupid name,” you turn to Peter.

“I think it fits him.”

“Of course you do, Spider Boy,” you reply. Peter just scoffs.

“What does it do?”

Peter narrows his eyes on the spider. “I think it has a camera for surveillance. I’m sure it does something cool.”

“Didn’t they tell you when they gave it to you? Or give you a manual or something?”

“No, they don’t know I know about it yet, but I’m sure we can figure it out,” he says as he begins to open the container.

“What do you mean they don’t kno-”

“What are you two doing?” The unexpected voice behind you has you and Peter turn around wide-eyed so quickly you could Pietro a run for his money. You and Peter stand in front of the container and let out a panicked, “Nothing!”

You finally take in whom the voice belongs to and the panic washes away from both you and Peter. You honestly should have known who it was off the bat when that very damn voice haunts your dreams. Well, ‘haunts’ isn’t really the right word.

“Oh, it’s just you,” you sigh in relief as Wanda approaches you both.

“Just me?” she quirks an eyebrow.

And suddenly, for reasons unknown (you know the reasons, you just won’t admit them yet), the panic comes back and you begin to ramble, “Yes, I mean NO! I mean yes you but not like ‘just’ you, you know? Like ‘it’s only you’ - er ‘it’s you only’ but like a good ‘it’s you only’ as in we’re glad it’s you and not someone else who came in -”

“Y/N, I think she gets it,” Peter stops your ramble.

You see Wanda giving you what seems to be an amused smile. You feel your cheeks heat up as you try looking anywhere else. Is it getting hot in here?

“Well, I was looking for you to ask if either of you wanted to watch a movie named ‘13 Going On 30’? Pietro says one of the characters looks like Bruce.”

You look to Peter to answer. You don’t think you can open your mouth anymore without embarrassing yourself.

“Yeah, we’ll be right down,” he replies with ease, lucky asshole.

You finally look at Wanda as she gives you a parting smile and you give an awkward one in return. Your eyes follow her until she is out of sight.

“You’ve got it bad,” Peter teases.

“Shut up,” you reply as you turn your attention back to the container.

Peter continues, “Like I thought I was bad at talking to girls-”

The empty container. Panic seems to be the mood for today as it comes back full force.

“Peter.”

“-but that was like next level.”

“Peter!”

“What?” he finally turns to you.

“RoboSpider is missing.”

“Aha! See, it’s not that stupid,” he says with a victorious smile on his face that quickly falls, “Wait what did you say?”

You simply point at the glaringly empty container.

“That’s not good.”

You give Peter the most sarcastic face you could muster.

“Help me look! It couldn’t have gone far,” Peter gets on his knees and begins searching for the spider.

You frantically search countertops, “Does it not have an off switch?”

“I don’t know.”

“Obviously or this wouldn’t be happening right now!” you whisper scream.

“Here, RoboSpider. Tsk tsk tsk. Come on out, boy,” Peter starts calling.

He looks ridiculous doing so from the floor. You step in front of him.

“You really think that’s going to work?”

He looks up at you and shrugs. You feel like you’re a minute away from sweating. Less than a minute based on the tickling sensation on your neck. Maybe Peter can tell to cause he’s looking at your neck, his eyes widening. You don’t know why it’s so shocking you’re sweating as he should be too because if Tony finds out you lost RoboSp- the damn spider, he will have your heads.

“Y/N, don’t freak out.”

Why did he have to say that? Freaking out is in your very nature. You do it so well. You’ve been doing it all day. Suddenly, you are all too aware of what you thought was sweat tickling your neck but now realize, unless you have discovered a new ability and become a water bender, sweat does not move like that. You close your eyes and try to steady your pulse. Don’t freak out.

“Peter. get. it. off.”

As hard as you tried to stop it, your pulse begins racing again as Peter slowly rises to his feet grabbing a cup and a paper from the counter. “Relax, I don’t think it bites.”

You open your eyes and ask once you see Peter reaching out, “Why the paper and cup then?”

“Precaution.”

You feel the spider still and somehow that pushes you over the edge. Your pulse goes into overdrive, your whole body breaks into goosebumps, and you finally let the urge to swat at your neck take over. It’s as if Peter and the spider sense this. All too quickly, the following happen: you bring your hand up to smack at your neck, Peter races to it first with the cup, and the spider bites down.

“Ow, shit!”

“Got it!”

Peter smiles triumphantly as you rub at your neck. He places the spider back in its container and properly closes it.

“You said it didn’t bite.”

“I also said not to freak out. Are you okay? Let me see,” he takes your hand off your neck to check the bite.

“Is it gross? Is it red? Green? Pulsing? Am I gonna die? Peter, say something!”

“It’s not there. I don’t see any bite. I think you might have just smacked yourself with your hand.”

Your hand comes back to your neck as you feel around. You don’t feel any bump. You take out your phone to look for a mark but don’t see one.

“Count yourself lucky, Parker,” you glare at him over your phone.

“Okay, but you should have seen your face,” he laughs as you both exit the lab. You just roll your eyes.

As you are walking to the common space, you feel your legs go a little numb. Peter notices you walking funny.

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” you assure him, “I think I’m still a little shaken up is all.”

You stop Peter right as you’re about to turn into the common space. You warn him, “We do not speak of what happened in the lab.”

Peter raises his hands up in defense, “Hey, I’m not trying to get in trouble either.”

“Okay, good.”

“Great. Now let’s join everyone and watch Bruce’s twin on screen while you stare at Wanda the whole movie.”

You smack his arm and then grab it leading him into the room as you comment, “Okay, but like that guy really does look like Bruce. How have I never noticed?”

That you didn’t deny the Wanda comment is not lost on either of you.

You can already smell the popcorn in the air right as you walk in. You immediately spot Wanda standing by the TV talking to her brother who seems to be growing frustrated with the remote. You note everyone who has joined you for the movie. Bucky and Steve are sitting on the long couch talking. Bucky looks like he had just woken up from a nap, his shirt wrinkled and hair slightly sticking up on one side. Steve is freshly showered wearing his usual attire. With his muscles showing through his shirt and his posture even as he’s sitting down, he looks untouchable, but you know differently with the bandage on the side of his forehead covering a wound he claims to be from a mission. Turning your head a bit more, you see Nat and Clint heading over to the couch with buckets of popcorn. Both are dressed for the gym but neither looked sweaty so you assume they decided to watch the movie instead. Farther down you see Bruce kneeled beside the single massage chair people usually fought over. You think he’s lost something under the chair.

You turn back to Wanda. She looks so soft in her matching sweats and crew neck sweater that you had not noticed she was wearing earlier. Granted, you were busy freaking out about getting caught with the spider. You can see her eyes shining bright and lips form a line as if trying to hold back laughter. She looks so carefree in the moment and you don’t think you’ve ever seen anyone so ethereal as she crosses her arms covering the bottom of her gorgeous cascading hair that always tempts your fingers to touch.

I wonder if it’s as soft as it looks.

“What is?” Peter says breaking your reverie.

“What?” You turn to look at him.

“You said you wondered if it’s as soft as it looks.”

“Oh, I don’t know. Do you think we should go help Pietro? He looks like he’s struggling,” you change the subject.

“Yeah, it’s kind of painful to watch.”

You and Peter walk over to the twins. Wanda spots you two first and gives you both a friendly smile. Trying not to look silly standing there blushing, you clear your throat, “Having trouble there, McQueen?”

Pietro looks even more exasperated after your comment.

“Once again, Y/N. Your teasing is of no use if I do not know what you are talking about.”

You roll your eyes, “I swear, one of these days it will be my turn to pick a movie and rest assured, it will be Cars. Now what is wrong with the remote?”

“I press up and down but it is moving side to side on the screen. And then I press the off and on button but it does not do it on time. It is broken.”

Peter takes the remote from Pietro.

You hear a quiet giggle from Wanda. You look at her and can clearly see her holding in laughter. You throw her a confused look wondering what could be so funny to have her like this. She nods past your shoulder so you turn to look. In your line of vision, you see Bruce fiddling with a remote on a massage chair that looks out of control rocking Bruce forwards and back over and over. You turn slightly to see Peter on what you now understand is not the TV remote pressing the up and down buttons. It is single handedly, the funniest goddamn thing you’ve witnessed. How Wanda kept it together that long, you don’t know because you do not last a second when it all clicks in your head. What you do know is Wanda’s laughter is the loveliest sound you’ve ever heard. Forget your favorite song of the month. You could hear her laughter on repeat forever.

Everyone in the room turns to look at the two of you laughing. Finally, after calming yourself down and wiping the tears from under your eyes, you wordlessly take the control from Peter, walk on over to Bruce, trade remotes with him, walk back over to Peter, and give him the correct remote. Everyone laughs save Peter, Bruce, and Pietro who look embarrassed.

“For two of the smartest people I know, that was just absurd,” you tell Peter. “I mean I get Pietro, but you Parker. Shame.”

“Hey! I understood that one,” Pietro replies.

Wanda just giggles beside you and you don’t know if it’s simply because of the whole control fiasco or because of her laughter that you feel so light inside. So light and happy in fact that for the first time since you met her, you look at her and you give her an honest to god genuine smile first. It is not an awkward smile you returned but one you gave her first without feeling shy or embarrassed. This time Wanda is giving you what you think looks like a shy smile though you know that could just well be wishful thinking. It is a smile nevertheless and it makes you feel like you are flying. You actually have to look down to make sure your feet are on the ground. You only look back up when you hear her voice again.

“I’m going to get some drinks. Y/N, come with me?” She nods her head toward the kitchen.

Quick, what do I say. “Of course, I’ll come with you anywhere.” NO! Absolutely not. That sounds dirty.Yes, I’ll follow you anywhere. Nope. That one sounds creepy. Oh, god. Now she’s looking at me weird. Oh my god, please don’t be reading my mind right now.

“No, you are very much saying everything aloud right now,” you hear Pietro say. You see color rise to Wanda’s cheeks. You turn to Pietro and Peter and if anything goes by Peter’s shocked face, you very much did say everything out loud. Pietro’s face is so damn smug as he passes by you and whispers, “I personally think ‘I’ll follow you anywhere’ sounds romantic.”

Peter follows closely behind Pietro and just gives you a shrug that says “what am I supposed to do?” when you give a desperate look that screams “HELP ME”. You close your eyes as you turn back around to Wanda.

“Can we just pretend I said ‘yeah, sure’ and nothing I actually said?”

You hear her say, “If that is what you want, okay. Now let’s go. I don’t think they will wait for us to start the movie.”

You finally open your eyes when you feel Wanda tug on your arm. She doesn’t let go until you make it to the fridge and when she does you feel warm where she touched you. You really need to get it together. She opens the fridge and takes out several sodas. As she hands you a few to carry, your fingers brush and though the cans are cold, you know they are not the reason goosebumps suddenly appear along your arm. You clear your throat and take a quick step back. Maybe a little too quick as you bump into the counter.

“Are you alright?” Wanda asks.

Embarrassed you answer, “Yep, totally cool.” Totally not thinking about how badly I’d like to hold your hand or anything. Nope. Totally cool. “Awesome. Excited really to um watch the movie.”

She looks up at you with rosy cheeks and a confused look. You can’t blame her. You don’t even know where you are going with this.

You feign hearing something from where everyone else is.

“I actually think I hear the movie playing. We should um go. We don’t want to miss the-the start and everyone is probably thirsty,” you stutter walking backwards back to the TV viewing area.

You turn around and shake your head at yourself. You can hear Wanda’s footsteps following not too far behind. You both begin handing out sodas to everyone who decided to watch the movie. You stand off to the side with the soda you were left with looking for where to sit. Bruce was still sitting in the massage chair that is now working in the way he likes. Nat, Bucky, Steve, and Clint sit on the longer couch. Pietro lies on his side on the floor right in front of the TV. Lastly, on the smaller couch sits Peter and now Wanda. Seems like you will be taking the floor as well.

You decide you’ll sit by Pietro. Better this way than sitting by his sister who is looking at you so intensely as if studying you or trying to figure what you are thinking without actually reading your thoughts. You know she wouldn’t do that if she could help it. She respects everyone enough to not invade their minds. Little does she know she invades yours everyday in the least expected way.

Just as you are about to sit, Peter calls your name, “Oh, Y/N, here you can have my seat.”

Fucking well-mannered asshole, you think to yourself. But then you are not so sure you kept that in your head after you hear Pietro chuckle.

You walk on over to the small couch as Peter crouches to the floor. You’ve been trying to avoid Wanda’s gaze but the closer you get the harder it is. You finally look at her and her gorgeous eyes that always make your head spin. You’re rather dizzy by the time you make it to the couch.

No, but like actually dizzy this time. Maybe you are coming down with something. That would actually be a godsend at a time like this. You don’t think you can last a whole movie sitting so close to Wanda.

You actually do feel a bit better sitting down. She gives you a small smile which you awkwardly return. Great. Back to awkward you. You stare down to the unopened soda can in her hand - orange soda. You know she isn’t going to drink that. Fortunately for her, you hold her preferred drink - Dr. Pepper.

“Here. Trade you,” you offer your drink to her.

“Oh!” She looks surprised, but pleasantly surprised you’d say based on the smile on her face when she sees the drink you are offering. “Are you sure?”

“Very,” you say. “I like orange better.” Lie.

“Thanks,” she takes the drink from your hand and gives you hers. “You know, this is actually my favorite.”

I know.

“Well then good thing I sat here as it worked out for the both of us,” you respond, your nerves settling down somewhat letting your body relax on the couch.

Of course that doesn’t last long when she also leans back comfortably looking you dead in the eye as she says, “Yeah, lucky me.”

You swear you feel your heart skip a beat, possibly a whole 16 bars worth. Then you think your heart stops beating all together when she leans her side into yours. You are pretty certain the couch is spacious enough to have no touching happening. You are in no shape to say anything though as you are basically trying to catch your breath while the movie plays. When you finally do breathe in deep, you suddenly wish you hadn’t. All you can smell is her shampoo.

How can anyone smell so good? It should be illegal. What is it, strawberry? Smells a little like flowers too.

“Good nose,” Wanda whispers, leaning more so into your space giving you a mini heart attack. “It’s strawberry shampoo and the lotion is rose scented. I can show you later if you want? Here, smell it.”

Wanda practically shoves her wrist under your nose. You are trying to remember the words to “Hail Mary” because this just might be the moment you die. You hesitantly sniff her wrist and though you wish you could stay there until all the oxygen in your body is replaced by that scent you quickly pull away.

“Yep, roses.”

You turn to give her a quick smile and shit she’s close. Any closer and you’d be bumping noses. You linger there for what feels like forever but you know it’s more around 5 seconds, 4 seconds longer than you would have ever allowed yourself before. Your throat goes dry.

“Sorry,” you whisper quickly as you turn your head to the TV to try to distract yourself. You pop open your soda and nearly chug it down all the way. Wanda is quiet beside you seemingly invested in the movie as she takes sips of her soda but you know she is not following along because every other minute you see her glance your way from your peripheral vision.

You feel her pull away from you and get off the couch, and you almost sigh in relief until you see her come back with a blanket. You finish off your soda and leave the can on the floor as she sits back down. You try to ignore her but she calls your attention by waving a side of the blanket in front of you asking if you want some. You shake your head no and Wanda pouts. Like she actually pouts and she waves the blanket again looking at you expectantly.

God, you’re too cute. Like I could ever say no to that face.

You nod giving your thanks as she throws the blankets over you as well.

“Good to know,” she says. As you’re about to ask what is good to know, she leans fully into your side, loops her arm around yours, and lays her head on your shoulder turning her attention back to the movie without a word. She either doesn’t realize or she doesn’t care that her actions have broken you. You are stiff as a board but you quickly will yourself to relax. You reason if this is the only chance you get to be with her like this, you may as well enjoy it.

As the movie goes on, you feel more relaxed than you ever felt. You don’t know if it is the warmth of the blanket or of having Wanda pressed so close, but you feel sluggish, almost tired-like but you know you’re not ready to sleep yet. It is almost like your brain is taking a little longer to catch up to what is happening.

When Wanda’s thumb is rubbing your hand, you sigh.

This feels nice. I always wondered what holding your hand would feel like. Now that I know, I don’t ever want to let go. You think or you think you think.

When she squeezes your hand, you’re not so sure you kept that in your head but this time you don’t really care because she sinks further into you. You don’t even know when she decided to hold your hand, but you are not complaining about it.

A few scenes go by, but not without your commentary. Usually your commentary gets a chuckle here and there or is ignored but these comments you make are not so forgettable. Not when you say things like

“You should try giving Nat a dollhouse, Banner” to Bruce making him blush and everyone stare at you incredulously and some laugh

and

“If your laugh was my ringtone, I would have so many missed calls because I’d want to hear it all the way through” to Wanda when she laughs at your previous comment. This has her blushing now. You hadn’t realized you said that until her cheeks turned pink and Peter whipped his head around to look at you with wide eyes. You ignore him and continue not really knowing where this is coming from. “You’re cute when you blush.”

Everyone is looking at you both now. She ducks her head and if she wasn’t blushing before, she is flushing now with all the attention. The movie is long forgotten. You pull her head to hide into your neck as you chuckle, “Hey, there’s no need to be embarrassed. If anything, Captain USA over there should be embarrassed telling everyone his head injury was from a mission.”

Steve’s eyes widen but so do Pietro’s for a different reason as he rushes over to you.

“Tell me everything,” he says like a child on christmas.

“Alright, alright. I hurt myself in training, okay?” Steve interrupts.

“Well, that’s not that interesting,” Pietro huffs.

“He threw his shield and it ricocheted,” you stage whisper.

Pietro’s eyes shine with glee. Everyone turns to look at Steve to see if there is any truth to the story and his face gives him away. Everyone bursts out laughing and you feel Wanda laughing as well in your arms.

“How did you even know that?” Peter asks.

“Tinman has cameras everywhere. I bet he has it recorded somewhere.”

“Man, I have to see it!” Peter exclaims and has most people agree.

“Okay, I promise it’s not that funny, guys,” Steve tries to calm everyone down.

“No, if you want funny, you should watch Guns and Arrows duet. What was it “Love is an Open Door?” you reply directing everyone’s gaze to Nat and Clint. Even Wanda pulls from you to look at them.

“You showed her the video?” Natasha glares at Clint.

“No, it’s on the internet for anyone to watch as they please. Clint makes a great Anna by the way.”

“This is the greatest day of my life,” Pietro says as he pulls out his phone searching for the video. “I don’t know what put you in this mood, but thank you.”

“I’ve got a lot more too,” you say as you get up from the couch, legs feeling a little wobbly, “but that will have to wait til I get back. I drank the soda too fast trying to calm my nerves from sitting so close to your sister.”

“Why would you be nervous? It’s just Wanda,” Pietro says.

You gape at him in disbelief as if he had just insulted you and he might as well have. It is as if everything else just disappears.

“ ‘Just’ Wanda?! You say that like she isn’t the coolest person in the world! Which makes you cool by default because you’re her twin, so you should be thanking her.”

You try to lean in closer to him as if to tell him a secret but your body is more swaying off balance than anything, “Don’t tell anyone but I get nervous around pretty girls. So of course I would be nervous around your sister. Also, don’t tell Peter cause he thinks he’s better than me at talking to girls and I refuse to admit he’s right.”

Pietro is wearing a shit eating grin as you move back. You don’t see everyone’s matching shocked faces as you turn. You turn too quickly and due to your weird state of being you fall face first into Peter. Luckily he catches you with ease.

“That was a close one,” you giggle. “Thanks, Spider Boy.”

“Y/N, are you feeling okay?” Peter asks. Everyone rushes over to you both.

“I’m great,” you respond as helps you up. “Is the room spinning or is it just me?”

“You should sit down, Y/N,” Wanda looks at you with worry.

You frown, “Hey, what’s wrong? Did Pietro eat your sandwich again? It’s okay. I can make you another one righ-”

“PARKER! L/N!”

Everyone’s heads turn to the voice coming from the elevator that could only be Tony’s.

“Do you think he knows about the spider?” you whisper to Peter as your vision goes blurry.

“How could you let the spider out! Do you even have a clue what it does?” Tony’s silhouette makes his way to you.

“So maybe it did bite you,” Peter looks at you guilty and picks you up as your knees give out again.

“Fucking RoboSpider,” is the last thing you say before everything goes dark.

***

When you finally come to, you are in your room in your pyjamas with a pounding headache. You slowly sit up on your bed. Your body is aching as well. Hearing your movement, Peter springs up from where he was sitting against the wall.

He approaches you slowly and hands you a glass of water, “Hey, how are you feeling.”

“Like a damn Stark tech spider bit me after I told my friend not to mess with it,” you manage to glare at Peter after

“Sorry. Are you mad?”

“Unless I got some cool spider powers out of it. Let’s see.”

You touch several objects around you exaggerating your actions so he clearly sees nothing is sticking to you.

“Nope, guess that answers that.”

“Look, I’m sorry, okay? I shouldn’t have let it out. That’s my fault and I totally take the blame. I told Mr. Stark that too,” he says as he sits by your side.

You accept his apology. You sit there with him in silence for a few minutes letting everything that happened settle in your mind.

“Oh, god. Everyone is probably mad at me. Why couldn’t I stop talking?” You take a pillow and scream into it.

“It was the spider. Apparently instead of venom it has a sort of truth serum-like substance that works I guess but it works I guess more like alcohol,” Peter explains.

“Remind me to never get drunk around any of you.”

Peter laughs and takes the pillow from you.

“If it’s any consolation, no one is mad at you. They, um, saw the video of you freaking out with the spider and say it’s even now.”

“Nooo,” you whine and Peter just chuckles beside you. His laughter dies down and he looks at you for a moment like something is pressing on his mind.

“Why are you looking at me like that? Did I do something else?” you start to panic. “Oh, my god, did I pee my pants?! I remember having to go to the restroom but I don’t remember going. Is that why I’m in my pjs? Did everyone see? Did Wanda see? I’m never coming out of this room.”

“Breathe, Y/N, breathe!” Peter places his hands on your shoulders and breathes with you.

“I was going to say that Wanda is waiting outside to talk to you.”

Your eyes widen, “Somehow that’s worse! How do I begin to apologize? I embarrassed her the most out of everybody.”

“Just talk to her. I’m sure it’s not as bad as you think,” he says getting up.

“Peter, don’t leave me yet. Peter!” you whisper yell as he makes his way to the door.

“You’ll be fine. We both know I’m better at talking to girls than you but I still have full confidence,” he replies cheekily as he exits leaving the door open.

“Asshole!” You call after him but to your misfortune Wanda walks in at the same time.

“Well that’s different. Usually I get a flustered greeting from you,” she says amusedly.

“S-sorry. That was for Peter. Not you. Never you. Unless, you like asshole -er being called asshole, but you probably don’t so… Hi, Wanda. What can I do for you?”

“There it is,” Wanda chuckles. You blush in return. She glances at the spot next to you where Peter had been sitting. “May I?”

“Yes,” you squeak. You clear your throat trying to sound less nervous. “Of course.”

You take a deep breath as she sits down closer than Peter had, your shoulders touching. You look at the door while she looks at you. You try to calculate how fast you would have to move to run out the door before she can close it with her powers. You know that even if you had Pietro’s speed, you still could not run fast enough to escape this conversation. It’s been a long time coming. It was time to own up and accept the feelings you tried to ignore. You would not run away this time. You will not deny what you’ve made blatantly obvious to everyone. You are in love with Wanda Maximoff.

“What’s going on in that head of yours?” Wanda asks.

“As if you don’t know. You’re the telepath here,” you turn your face to hers.

“You know I won’t do it on purpose. I’ll only hear thoughts that-”

“Are loud,” you finish for her. “I know. I also know my mind is practically screaming my thoughts at you.”

“I’d rather hear them come from your mouth,” she replies quietly.

“Before I go and ruin everything-”

“You won’t,” Wanda interjects and moves to hold your hand.

“Before I go and ruin everything,” you begin again, “I want to apologize if I embarrassed you yesterday or made you uncomfortable in any way. That being said, I cannot apologize for what I said because I meant every word and I refuse to take them back even if it makes us being around each other awkward or difficult. I just want to be honest.”

You squeeze her hand and take a deep breath. You look right into her eyes, your heart beating fast. You’re scared but also excited to finally say the words.

“I love you.”

The words are said with such confidence, you’re shocked. Maybe, you’re more shocked they didn’t come from you. It takes a moment for you to shake from your stupor.

“I-I was going to say that.”

“You were taking too long,” she says as she leans in and kisses you. It takes you two seconds to get your act together and kiss her back. You close your eyes and your heart slows to its regular beating as a calm washes over you. All worries of unrequited feelings forgotten. There are no nerves to interrupt your actions. No doubts hold you back from kissing her harder as she moves to sit on your lap without breaking your kiss. When the need to breathe can’t be ignored, you pull back feeling light headed.

She smiles at you and she is the most beautiful thing you have ever come across with her chest heaving, lips bruised, and strands of her hair falling in front of her face. You look at her adoringly as you push her hair back to see her whole face.

“I love you,” you finally say.

“Wasn’t too hard, was it?” she laughs.

You roll your eyes and you kiss her this time.

***

“So, how’d it go?” Peter asks a few hours later.

“Her hair is as soft as it looks.”

#wanda maximoff x reader #my first attempt at writing #wanda maximoff imagine #wanda maximoff #peter parker

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potatoes-is-are-food · 3 years

Note

Not the same anon but I would really like those demonic poly Shigadabi headcanons maybe some poly shigadabikei headcanons if your okay with it but it’s fine if you don’t want to spoil the series in anyway. I love their relationship, it’s the cutest despite being weird. Love you and don’t overwork yourself with writing and work😘

So I wanted to include Kei but also not give too much away about what’s coming up so here’s some mostly shigadabi demon hcs but with a little bit of keigo in there too and keep in mind these take place later into the story after they’ve had little sacrifice for a while so things are more established.

This is somewhat short but any other questions about this fic are welcome!

SFW(slight mentions of nsfw)

- Tomura still very much enjoys occasionally freaking you out, telling you creepy/gross things that demons are known to do like actually eating their sacrifices.

- Dabi tries to make him stop but there’s plenty of times you’re alone with Tomura and there’s really not much he can do aside from console you and let you know sometimes the weird shit he says isn’t even true.

- That doesn’t mean he doesn’t also pick on you for being too trusting, often luring you into thinking he’s going to do something soft only to see how you react when he ravishes you when you’re off guard.

- Keigo is just as bad, possibly even worse although much more lighthearted with his teasing. He won’t tell you about how he cannibalized another demon once (too long of a story anyway) but he will poke fun of you for anything mundane that can get you flustered. Very prone to pinching soft places on your body that get you riled up and squirming.

- Dabi occasionally likes to take you out for a date to the human world for some one-on-one time. It’s really sweet and he usually lets you pick what activity to do since he’s really only there to be selfish and have you alone for a little while.

- Keigo takes you out a lot, he loves the human world and thinks it’s fun to “play boyfriend” especially if it means you’ll let him rail you in a love hotel while you’re out.

- Dabi is closer to Tomura and Kei than they are to each other but that doesn’t mean you don’t occasionally happen across the two of them playing videogames together all snuggled up on the couch.

- The pocket you stay in becomes their permanent residence so any time they’re not on a contract they’re home. You’re not left alone often and when you are it’s not more than a few hours before a tired demon storms in and demands your attention again.

- Tomura has no filter and spills secrets about Dabi and Keigo constantly, pissing both of them off to no end when you come asking questions about why Keigo assumed he was supposed to eat his sacrifices or why the fuck did Dabi decide to put staples in his skin when that wasn’t part of his punishment.

- Since Dabi is nice and got you a nice pocket to live in it came with seasons, so you get to go play in the snow, the rain, sit out in nicer weather with a book if you want, etc. Also means your demons get to play with you outside when it’s not too hot or cold.

- They’re all very very fond of you but that doesn’t mean they’re not pricks a fair amount of the time. Watched a sad movie and now you’re crying? Oh get ready for condescending cooing “oh poor little sacrifice can’t handle a movie, what a baby come here and let me kiss your tears away” only to lick up your neck and face and laugh when you sniffle.

- There just is truly nothing they love more than picking on you to various extents, Dabi stops if you start to seem genuinely upset, Keigo stops when your eyes get glossy and you’ll let him “comfort” you, and Tomura likes to lick up your tears after he’s pushed too far and the way you cling to him anyway even though he caused your distress.

- Typically things are calm and at least two of them are around so you have a lap to sit in while you listen to them discuss contracts. Sometimes they let you ask questions but the answer is usually violent and therefore very censored.

- Demons don’t actually need to sleep but it does feel nice and since you enjoy it (read: get pounded to exhaustion regularly), they like to relax and have a nap beside you when you’re passed out from their rough treatment or dimensional travel.

- They’re mean and stuff a lot but their affection more than makes up for it. Constant sweet words, hand holding, soft kisses, checking up on your needs often and making sure you’re okay after they’re harsh or rough.

NSFW

- Tomura seriously just does not understand about 98% of human etiquette and has on SEVERAL occasions tried to grope/strip/hump/otherwise violate you in public in broad daylight in crowded areas. Dabi no longer lets him take you out alone.

- They’re all constantly groping you when you’re home. Hands up your skirt, around your neck, on your waist, etc.

- Don’t say you’re bored unless you want one of your demons to flip you onto your back and start prepping you to take their cock. Cause that’s what’ll happen.

- Their casual touches rile you up and they absolutely know and use that to their advantage, lightly trailing fingers all over your body at any given moment just waiting for you to snap and let them know what you want.

- If you come up on your own and sit on Keigo’s lap, straddling him and kiss any part of his face or neck he just melts. Finish what you start, though, or he’ll take what he wants after spanking you raw for being a tease.

- You will never be able to fit Tomura’s monster dick in your mouth but that won’t stop him from getting you to try every so often. Your jaw hurts and you strain but it just doesn’t fit so he usually settles for finishing in your mouth and watching you swallow it or make out with Dabi while it’s coating your mouth and throat.

- Dabi prefers to let you do what you want when you’re blowing him, often commenting that you suck at it but at least you look cute while he strokes your face and ruffles your hair. He usually just moves onto fucking you.

- Keigo, however, likes to fuck your face every single time and cum as far down your throat as possible. He’s sweet after, though and tells you you did a great job while he gives you some cool water to soothe the demolished back of your throat.

- For whatever reason they all seem to really like fucking you in front of each other, even when the others aren’t involved. You’ll just casually be getting bounced on Dabi’s lap while Tomura plays videogames beside you on the couch and it’s just a very normal occurrence.

- They’re all nice to ride for different reasons: Dabi praises and degrades you sweetly, lets you ride however you like while he strokes your soft skin until you cum and he flips you over to pound his own release into you. Tomura usually loses patience and starts bucking up into you just right to make you a drooling mess, clinging to him for dear life while he pinches at your clit to make you squeeze him while he floods your insides. Keigo likes to sit back and watch the show, forcing you to keep going no matter how many times you gush on top of him until he finishes, head thrown back and an absolutely gorgeous blush covering his cheeks as his eyes roll back in his head.

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nerdzzone · 3 years

Text

Only For A Moment: August

Summary: A series of shorter one shots from Chris and Whitney’s life together throughout the pandemic. Some happy times, some harder times, some fluff and some things a little more sexy - they work through it all as they try to get settled in their new and blossoming relationship.

Chris Evans x OFC

Part of the Once Bitten/More Hearts series

Only For A Moment: July

Note: I’ve had a super busy day, but I wanted to get this posted so I edited it really quickly. Please forgive me if there’s any little mistakes!

Thank you to everyone who has liked, reblogged and commented! Hearing your thoughts really makes my day!

-----

August 2020

I think you'd be hard-pressed to find someone who actually enjoys moving - especially if that move involves a three year old who feels the need to be very involved in the packing, but is also incredibly easily distracted. And even more so when that child's father is almost just as distractible and, despite his insistence that he'd stay focused, does more to hinder the whole operation than help.

That was the situation that I found myself in at the end of the first summer of the pandemic because we were moving in with Chris.

While I was hesitant at first, it made the most sense and neither Grayson nor I were particularly eager to return to our tiny little apartment. I still felt that it was pretty early in our relationship for us to be living together, but we'd survived so far and moving back seemed like it would do more harm than good. Grayson had settled in nicely at Chris' house and another big change - like making him go back to having two homes - seemed like it would be very disruptive.

But moving came with it's own challenges.

After our conversation a few months earlier, Chris had told all of his most trusted friends about our change in relationship status. That came in handy as a few of his buddies - who had trucks - had volunteered to help us move things the last weekend of August, but packing had me feeling overwhelmed. I'd managed to give most of the furniture away - between our friends and Chris' family - but we still had way too much stuff.

It was on that Saturday morning that I found myself sitting in the middle of Grayson's old bedroom almost in tears. I'd packed up his mountain of toys the night before only to find Chris and Grayson unpacking several boxes the next morning while I was trying to finish up in the living room. Apparently, Grayson had wanted a certain toy that I'd already packed and instead of telling him to wait because he had several other things to play with that weren't boxed up, Chris helped him look for it.

He was trying to be helpful, thinking that repacking a few things would be easier to deal with than a meltdown from Grayson, but it had been a long, tiring week as I tried to get everything organized and their actions almost pushed me to my breaking point. I scolded them both and banished them to the little playground just outside the building while I set to work cleaning up their mess.

Almost twenty minutes later, I heard a knock on the front door as it creaked open. I poked my head out of the room I was in - ready to send the boys straight back outside - only to see Chris' oldest and closest friend, Tara. She was masked up for safety and knowing how sweet and helpful she was, she was a refreshing sight. I'd met her several times, mostly when Grayson was a baby and I lived with Chris, and she'd been a calming and encouraging presence back then so I was definitely relieved to see her during another time of high stress.

"Hey," I smiled. "What are you doing here?"

"I brought supplies," she informed me, holding up a tray of iced coffees. "Chris called and said that he thought you could use some help."

"You're a lifesaver," I groaned with pleasure as she put down the tray and handed me one of the drinks. "I need this, thank you so much."

"You're welcome," she returned my smile. "How's the packing going?"

"Not bad now that the boys are outside," I laughed. "It's pretty much all done, I think. You never realize how much junk you have until you have to pack it all up."

"Oh my god, I know. We moved last year and it felt like the piles of things we had to take was never ending."

"It's crazy," I agreed. "Especially with all Gray's stuff. I thought we did a good job of not spoiling him, but he has an insane amount of toys."

"I can imagine," she cringed. "But I have no plans all day so just tell me what you need help with and I'm all yours."

I thought for a moment as I sipped the coffee she'd brought me until I had an idea.

"Actually..." I started, feeling a bit sheepish. "Would you be willing to take Grayson for a bit? I know it's a big ask, especially while he's so excited, so feel free to say no."

"Are you kidding? I'd love to take him!"

I let out a breath of relief as I felt my body relax.

"Thank you so much. I really need Chris to help me carry these boxes and he's been so preoccupied with Grayson that he's been no use at all," I explained. "It's a big change and he's worried about him being freaked out by it all, which I totally get, but I need him to focus a bit too."

Tara laughed and shook her head.

"I get it, don't worry. I know what he can be like," she assured me. "I'll go down and get Gray now and send Chris up here."

"Thank you. You're the best, Tara."

She waved off my gratitude and insisted it was no problem before leaving me to turn my attention back to what I'd been doing before she arrived.

Once Grayson was in the safe care of Tara, Chris was much more useful. We were packing things with impressive speed and when it was almost time for his friends to show up with their trucks, we started moving things down to the lobby of the building to make the loading process quicker.

I was a tad nervous about the whole situation as I hadn't spent much time with most of Chris' friends and I didn't really know what they thought of me. I hoped they'd be understanding of our situation and give me a chance, but if he really had been pining away for me all these years - thinking that I didn't want to be with him - I worried that they'd think I was selfish and heartless.

Those worries, combined with my stress about getting everything organized, had me still feeling rather on edge. It didn't help that the creepy maintenance man that I'd warned Chris about was watching us like a hawk. I could feel his eyes on me every time I stepped foot in the lobby and the sensation made my skin crawl. I just wanted to get it all done and over with as fast as possible so we could get away from him, but Chris had clearly noticed him too and I could feel his annoyance rising as well.

He held it together until our last trip down when our spectator really crossed a line. I was bending over to place some boxes on the ground when I could have sworn I heard a groan of pleasure from behind me. I snapped back up to standing and looked over my shoulder to see the man with a smirk on his face and his eyes fixed on me. It made my stomach churn, but Chris was immediately by my side, his arm sliding around my waist. Before I could even question what he was doing, he pulled down his mask and then my own, cupped my jaw with his hand and pulled me in for a kiss.

It was a rather passionate embrace and I was surprised as he usually wasn't one for public displays of affection. Then it hit me why he was doing it and I felt a flash of annoyance run through me as he pulled away. There was a smirk on his face as he rested his forehead against mine, but all I could muster was a frown.

"Do you think he got the hint?"

I scoffed at his question.

"I think he got enough pictures to pay his bills for the next few months," I huffed, keeping my voice low so we wouldn't be overheard. "Are you done marking your territory now?"

Chris looked taken aback by my harsh tone and I sighed as I slipped out of his grasp and headed to the door. I wanted to see if his friends had arrived yet and get away from the creep, but Chris followed and wasn't prepared to let our conversation drop.

"What, so I'm not allowed to kiss you in public in case someone sees?" He asked once we got outside, his own annoyance coming through. "I thought you didn't care if people found out about us?"

I stopped walking and spun around to face him.

"I don't care," I snapped. "But I'd rather not give some pervert the chance to profit off of us just to save your wounded pride."

Even with his mask pulled back up, I could see Chris' jaw clench with frustration.

"He was being disrespectful. I was standing right there and he moans while staring at your ass? C'mon, he's a fuckin' asshole."

Another flare of anger washed over me as I fought to keep myself calm enough to explain to him why what he'd just said was almost as frustrating as the actions of the man who'd been ogling me.

"He was being disrespectful," I agreed, my voice steady despite my rising temper. "But to me, not to you! It doesn't matter if I have a boyfriend or not, he shouldn't behave like that towards any woman! I don't deserve to be respected because of you, I deserve to be respected because I'm a human being who has a right to feel safe in their own apartment building."

Chris' shoulders dropped as he took in my words and visibly calmed down, but I was still feeling wound up.

"Shit, Winnie, you're right," he relented. "I don't want anyone to treat you like that ever, not just because you're my girlfriend. It just pissed me off that he had the balls to do that even in front of me."

"So kissing me like that to send him a message was the best solution you could think of? Like, 'don't touch this one, she's mine'. It made me feel gross. I don't need you claiming me in public to scare off creeps, thanks."

"I didn't mean it like that," Chris insisted, looking slightly wounded by my scolding. "I'm sorry, I was being an idiot."

"Okay," I shrugged, somewhat blowing off his apology. "We should go to the parking lot. Your friends might be here."

"Are we good, Win?" He asked, clearly not as eager to let the subject drop. "I want to make this right if you're upset..."

"I'm fine," I sighed, knowing that was only half true. It was only half his fault though, the stress of the day overall was more to blame and, at that point, I just wanted it to be over so I could have a nice big glass of wine. "Let's just go see where your friends are."

He didn't argue as I walked off and when we turned the corner into the parking lot, his friends were all there lined up in the visitor's spots. I forced a smile despite the fact that it was hidden by my mask and waved as we walked over.

"Hey!" I greeted them. "Thanks so much for doing this. We really appreciate it."

"Ah, no worries!" Jon assured me. "But, are you really sure you want to move in with this guy?"

"Yeah, we were just talking," Zach continued. "And it feels a bit Stockholm syndrome-y. He confines you to a house and suddenly you fall in love? Seems a bit suspicious."

"Wow, guys, glad you're on my side," Chris laughed. "I wouldn't have asked you to help out if I knew you'd try and change her mind!"

"We just want to make sure we're not committing any crimes here," Luke insisted. "I don't want to be an accomplice to anything and we're all scratching our heads about what she could see in you."

Chris shook his head at their teasing and I tried to push our earlier discussion from my mind as I giggled and slid my hand into his. I felt him tense up in surprise at the gesture, but he relaxed as I squeezed it and leaned against his arm.

"There's no Stockholm syndrome here," I assured them. "It just took a pandemic and the constant threat of impending doom for me to come to my senses. I'm just lucky Chris was silly enough to wait for me."

Chris chuckled and leaned over to place a kiss on the top of my head as his friends rolled their eyes.

We quickly went over the game plan for the day once the initial greeting was over and as soon as his friends turned to head towards the building, I dropped my hand from Chris'. I knew I was being petty and sulky and from the sigh that fell from Chris' lips, he did too, but I couldn't help it - I needed some space to work through my cranky mood on my own. Luckily, Chris seemed to figure that out pretty fast and left me to my brooding as we followed his friends and got to work.

It didn't take us as long as I expected to load all the boxes into the trucks, but that was probably the benefit to having a team of strong men helping you move. Once it was all unloaded into the spare bedroom at Chris' place where I had been sleeping at the start of the pandemic, Chris broke out a few beers for his friends and fired up the grill while we waited for Tara and Gray to arrive. It was a beautiful, warm evening and perfect for an impromptu barbecue to thank all Chris' friends and it was a great opportunity for me to bond a bit more with some of the most important people in Chris' life.

Grayson knew them all better than I did, but we had some concerns that the lack of socialization would make him nervous around the now somewhat unfamiliar faces. But he put those worries to bed almost as soon as he arrived as he was the life of the party. He was thrilled to see the three men who were sitting in the lawn chairs dotted around our yard - in an effort to keep everyone somewhat distant from each other - and the cheer they let out as soon as they saw him made me think they were just as excited. They seemed to really adore him and he thrived on the attention. It warmed my heart to see the genuine care they all had for Grayson - it was wonderful to know he had so many people in his corner - and I was relieved when that care was extended to me.

Any doubts that I'd had about them accepting me were quickly pushed from my mind as they seemed to be just as eager to get to know me as I was to get to know them. They were all lovely, kind people and I wondered why I ever expected anything else from the people in Chris' inner circle.

They left as soon as Grayson's bedtime rolled around - partially because we were all tired from our long day of moving boxes and partially because we all knew there was no way that Gray was going to agree to go to bed while the party was still going. Once they were gone, he demanded Chris tuck him in so I tidied up in the kitchen while he handled bedtime.

As soon as I'd finished putting the last few dishes in the dishwasher, I felt his arms around my waist.

"Hey," he whispered in my ear, his chin resting on my shoulder. "Thanks for cleaning up."

"You don't need to thank me," I smiled, turning in his arms so we were face to face. "It's my house to keep clean too now, even if that's still weird to think about."

"Weird in a good way?"

"Definitely," I nodded. "It's felt like home here for a while now. It would have been awful to go back to that little apartment."

"It would have been weird for me too," Chris agreed. "I can't imagine being in this big house without you guys anymore."

"You'd have to move all your friends in," I teased, using it as a segue. "Who, by the way, are all very nice."

"Yeah?" Chris grinned. "You think so?"

"I do. I was a bit nervous about it," I admitted. "In case they resented me for how our relationship unfolded, but they're great."

"They never resented you at all," Chris chuckled. "Pretty much everyone who knows about our first night together was on your side about that and they've been pushing me to make a move ever since."

"Well, that's good to know."

Chris nodded and continued.

"They all really like you. Jon gave me clear instructions to not fuck it up."

I laughed at that, but felt a wave of relief.

"I appreciate their support."

"Well, you definitely have it."

Chris leaned down to press his lips against mine and I melted into his body, feeling the exhaustion from the stress of the day start to hit me. We stayed like that, just holding each other for a few minutes until Chris broke the silence around us.

"Can we talk about earlier?"

My stomach churned with embarrassment at the memory, but I nodded.

"Of course, we can. I'll start by saying that I'm sorry."

Chris leaned back slightly, just enough to look down at me with his confusion written all over his face.

"You're sorry? Why are you sorry?" He asked. "I brought it up so that I could apologize to you."

"You don't need to," I assured him. "I get why you did what you did. I just don't deal with stress very well and the whole day was overwhelming me. I shouldn't have taken it out on you."

"You don't deal with stress very well? I never would have known!" His words were laced with sarcasm as he smiled down at me and I laughed, gently smacking his chest in protest. "But seriously, I deserved a good scolding. You were absolutely right with what you said, I shouldn't have handled the situation like that."

"I appreciate that you can see where I was coming from," I sighed. "But there is no perfect way to handle a situation like that, really. It's best just to ignore it, but then it feels like you're letting the gross guy win."

"Well, if we're ever in a situation like that again, I'll follow your lead," he insisted. "But I can't say that I'll just ignore it. I might just punch the guy out for being a creep."

I laughed again before shaking my head.

"And then whoever is watching will have a different kind of picture to sell to the trashy magazines."

Chris cringed at that comment.

"I'm sorry. Do you really think he took pictures?"

"I don't know," I shrugged. "But if he recognized you then I'd be surprised if he didn't."

Chris nodded, clearly getting lost in thought for a moment before he spoke again.

"And you really don't care if proof gets out that we're together?"

"I don't," I insisted. "I don't like the idea of some pervert making money off of us, but I don't care if people know we're together. It might be good for people to get used to the idea now, when we're hiding at home all the time anyway. By the time we can go outside again, no one will care enough to take pictures of us."

"That might be wishful thinking," Chris smiled. "But I'll do my best to keep you out of the spotlight."

I matched his smile and stretched up to place a kiss on his lips.

"I'm sure it'll be fine."

As I predicted, the creepy maintenance man did take pictures of us and he did sell them to some trashy magazine. The internet was horrified, the hearts of fangirls all over the world were broken and I was called every cruel name under the sun. There were rumours that I trapped him with another baby and rumours that I was a gold digger - just using Chris for his money so I didn't have to work during the pandemic. The general reception to the forced confirmation of our relationship was pretty abysmal, but nothing worse than we expected and at the end of the day we didn't care.

All the people who truly cared about us were happy for us and that was the most important thing.

September

Tags: @maggotzombie @moonlacebeam @mizzzpink @zaylaugh @flowery-mess @flowerjewels @njrronaldo7 @hockeychick10 @partypoison00 @theladybiers @sidepieces @firoozehmoon @patzammit @sparkledfirecracker @mytbel0st @chvntelle-99

#chris evans #chris evans fanfiction #chris evans fanfic #chris evans fan fiction #once bitten/more hearts #only for a moment

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slashingdisneypasta · 3 years

Text

Human!Freddy Krueger x Fem!Reader || Oneshot

Title: What The Fuck Now, Freddy!?

Notes:

This is not inherently romantic, at all. Or sexual. Just... Freddy being a bastard, and you are caught in the crosshairs- and are forever linked with him because of it.

I've been listening to Lizzie, a lot lately- and this is inspired by 'What The Fuck Now, Lizzie!?'

Also- I'm thinking this will have a part 2. Due to the ending not being quite enough. Maybe a part for the court proceedings!

Plot: Many will know the story of that terrible day Krueger essentially snapped- killing his wife, Loretta Krueger. She saw the basement, they say, and he didn't like that. Their daughter saw the whole thing and suffered a traumatic response to seeing the sight of her mother, strangled to death, by her father- and forgot the whole thing.

But if she were to remember something, one day.

She may remember something no one knows about that day, aside from Freddy himself.

She may remember, that someone else was there.

She may remember you.

Alternatively- you're being blackmailed by Freddy who found out you, another supposedly Plain Jane in Loretta's 'mothers club', is cheating on your husband and calls you up to help deal with the mess he made. Because who else did he have?

Warnings: Okay lemme see, its basically a potluck of triggers. Hm. Murder, swearing, cheating (You, on your husband. Not with Freddy), getting rid of a body, a child gets traumatised (Obviously, Kathy/Maggie), Freddy himself, mention of the basement and all that entails, reader with a very questionable moral compass. Look, I think if you can watch Freddy's Dead, you're good here.

I'm just heading out the door, to go grocery shopping - or, at least, that's the story I tell my husband. When really I don't do the grocery shop until the day after tomorrow. He never notices... - when the phone rings. By very nearly tripping over my feet in my endeavour to catch it before the ringing stops, I manage pick up the phone with very little injury besides an achy, slightly twisted ankle. "Hi! Hi, sorry, I'm here. Hello?"

Pouting, I sit down at the kitchen table; Rubbing my poor ankle to sooth the pain, which would soon diminish anyway. Still- I'm sorry, ankle. I'll try to chill.

When the voice on the other end reveals who it is who's called the house, I lose all need to be pleasant. Damn. I really need to memorise this goddamn number... so I can not answer it. "Whatcha wearin'?"

"Thank god Harrison didn't answer this, you fuck." I deeply roll my eyes. Thank god Har's out. No, this is not my mister, not the man I was going to meet just now- but its bad, enough. In an entirely different way. Its stupid, blackmailing, son of a... hundred maniacs. "What do you want?"

"What a way to answer the phone, Y/N. Gee, seems like every time I we talk, I'm learning how you really aren't in the right place, are you? Cheating on your poor husband, swearing... These aren't really signs of the perfect suburban house wife, is it?" Gritting my teeth, I keep from lashing out. I've learned, if you stay real quiet, Freddy wont have anything to pull from and will get bored quick. "Why so silent, hm?"

"... " Oh, fuck me. I cant help it. "Wondering where you get off judging me on being 'suburban', actually."

"Anywhere I like, thanks."

Oh... oh. Gross?

He doesn't see the disgust tearing my face into two perfect halves right now, but my silence must be enough as he laughs. The sound is directly into the phone, and harsh on my poor eardrums. Ugh... "Oh for gods sake... What are we? Fourteen years old?? Come on- why'd you call?"

"Uhhhh... " Quickly, midway through that drawn out 'um' sound, Freddy's voice transitions, and gets a whole lot darker. Something deep in his chest dislodging, to make it so. Perhaps, his heart. "Well... you might wanna come and see for yourself."

"Uh, I don't think so. I have somewhere to be right now- "

"Oh well you don't, anymore." And its clear what he isn't saying- or else I'll tell Harrison about Carter and set your life on fire. "Tell your boy toy you're takin' a reign check for the day. I think you'll last. In fact... after you come over here, you might be out of the game for a couple a hours at least- maybe days."

Hold on, hold on Freddy what the fuck- "What!?"

"... Believe it or not, I didn't actually mean for that one."

Moron.

Nevertheless, no matter how just... off setting, Freddy is, I had to when he asked. I had to jump when he said so.

Because if not, then he would tear my life apart.

So here I am, about to knock on that big red door he lives behind, wondering what I'm walking into. Where's Loretta? Where's Kathy? How long will the visit be? I told Carter I'd be an hour or two late- any longer and I wont see him at all today. Which would absolutely suck.

Just after my knuckles come down on the wood the first time, a hand comes down on my shoulder and I immediately jump out of my skin... then slowly look around.

There's Freddy, a cheeky grin on his face. It does nothing to set my nerves at ease. "Ugh... Why are you out here?"

"We're going to the backyard. Lets go." Taking me by the shoulders, he marches me around the side of the house, instead of through it for some reason, and into the familiar backyard. I've been here numerous times, as Loretta likes to hold our club meetings here - Barbecue's, tea's... that sort of thing. Just to let the kids play together and so the adults can enjoy some adult conversation. Its a nice yard... but depending on what her horrid husband is about to show me, it may not be considered as such anymore... - , but I'm now starting to develop a sick feeling in my stomach.

Honestly- I don't know much about Freddy at all. Yes, I went to school with him, but that doesn't mean much when he was a freaky loner kid the whole time. I remember he killed the class hamster once- that's about the only splash he ever made in the news pool; But it definitely stuck.

Yes, Loretta cleaned up his image a fair bit since getting married, but now he's blackmailing me, and as far as I know I'm now alone with him.

Suspicious of him suddenly, I slip out of his grip with a dirty look flashed his way. Don't touch me.

He just rolls his eyes, leading me around some hedges.

And then everything stops.

Him, me, the air; The air around me, the breeze, the breath in my throat.

There lays Loretta, on the ground. If I was really really naïve, I could imagine she were sleeping... or passed out, at least, due to the way she's sprawled out. No one would lay down like that willingly.

But... her eyes are open.

For a moment I'm tempted to kneel down; Take a closer look. Find out how, myself. Is she bleeding anywhere that I cant see now? Are her lips turning blue? If I moved some short red hair out of the way- would their be marks on her neck yet?

But then I come to my senses...

And freak. The fuck. O u t.

"What, the fuck, did you do!?" I whip around, looking at Freddy now which entirely new eyes. I mean, before I sure wasn't fond- but now I'm filled with something new, looking at him. Something a lot worse, something that makes me want to run. Run, and hide, and stay there.

And all these, even though he hasn't really changed. He still wears a mischievous smirk, stony blue eyes eating up my reactions... like always. But this time its just so so much worse. "Made some dead weight- now you're gonna help me get rid of it. So!" Finally, though its been only a matter of seconds, he turns his gaze off of me and I'm glad. That gaze is far too heavy. "Ideas?"

Only for a moment am I lost for words, struggling to push anything out. "I... I'm sorry??"

His gaze returns to mine, but this time my eyes are hard as his are dark. "Help. Me. Get rid of her. Fucking. Body. Or do you want your dirty laundry aired for the whole community to hear?"

Before I can help myself, I let out a sharp laugh, only succeeding in making Freddy's scowl deeper. "Freddy- this secret's a lot bigger, then mine. Sure, I might get divorced- but you're going to prison!" Does he get that? He's g o i n g to j a i l. Crossing my arms, I try to avoid looking at my ex-friend's body. I cant. "I'm sure as hell not gonna be in there with you, for being an accomplice."

I really cant look at her... I can only focus on Freddy. And that takes a lot of energy- its taking everything in me, in fact. Everything I have. But I have to. If its him or her, there's no choice.

But... then a creepy smile spreads across his face- a vast polarity to the frustrated glower of before. It makes my blood run cold.

"Ohhhh..." He looks almost ferocious, even in his composed state. Like a monster. Like any moment a fanged, inhuman creature is going to burst out of him and I'm going to wake up, and this will have been a nightmare. A horrible nightmare. The kind where that creature haunts me for a long time, after its over. After this over.

He's going to haunt me.

"You must think this is my first time... " My heart turns to ice, mouth hanging a little open... what the fuck have I found myself a part of!? Suddenly all the children's disappearances on the news lately come to the forefront of my brain... "Sweetheart, give a man his dues. I'm a hard working kinda guy... " I watch his gaze flicker to a door - the back door? No... The basement door, - and when a filthy smirk pulls at his mouth, my heart flies up into my throat. God, it makes me feel sick. I want to be violently ill. "My first was my adoptive Dad... pretty sick, huh?"

The fact that he didn't say anything about the basement, makes my imagination go wild. I swallow it down, though.

I just need to get out of here, and never think about this again.

And to do that I need to help Freddy get rid of this goddamn body- and... probably... testify at court... As the panic starts to finally rise up in my, right up to fill my throat, I immediately take in a deep breath and slowly let it out. "Okay... " No time to freak out. Now's the time for action.

Gaze flickering to Loretta again, I try to acclimatise to the sight. I think its a lost cause, though. "How did you get rid of him? Your Dad?"

"No, that's not gonna work. He was a drunk dead beat, and I just had to tell the police some guy's he owed money to came over to the house." Freddy grins happily at the memory, but then just as quickly, scowls at his poor deceased wife's body- that certainly cant fight back. I just tack this onto the long list of reasons I hate him. "Lore's such a goddamn goody goody- we cant do the same thing. You don't think I woulda thought of that??"

"Hey." I snap, hands braced on my hips as I flash a glare his way. "This is not the time to get defensive!"

"Whatever... "

Then- suddenly, something occurs to me. Confused, I look around; A deeply horrified feeling disturbing my stomach. "Hold on... Where's your daughter?" Seeing no sign of her anywhere, I definitely start to panic again- especially when I look to Freddy and just see a pert look in his eyes as he looks back at me, a smile that strikes something horrid inside me. My eyes narrow. "You sick fuck- where the fuck is she!??"

"Under the bed."

"What the fuck does that mean!?" I exclaim, frustrated and freaking out. He did not- he did not! Killing your spouse is one thing, but the kid?? Your own kid??

I don't wait around for him to be cryptic some more, and rush right into the house to look for her. Under the bed, under the bed, under the fucking bed...? Which fucking bed!? Forcing ferocity out of my voice, I carefully call out to Kathy. Hoping to god she answers. I try to sound normal. Maybe a little bit cheerful; Excited.

But my voice wobbles.

"Kathy?? Sweetheart, its Y/N! Are you hiding? I have something for you... " ?? You have something for her, Y/N?? God... now you have to figure out some kind of treat.

You know what? Whatever. We'll figure that out later.

Lets just hope we aren't searching for a corpse. I'd definitely be sick, seeing a child... the way Loretta is...

Shaking my head and clenching my fists, I try to focus on Kathy.

I check under the bed in the guest room because it comes into view first and she isn't there, then her bedroom and she isn't there either... and get a sick feeling as soon as I enter the last bedroom. Freddy's and Loretta's.

God, I've never been in here before but its like a museum peace now. A horrible one. Like if you would walk into the Titanic... or the Borden house.

"Kathy? You in here?" Flicking on the light I kneel down on the ground, and check under the bed.

And something immediately crashes over me, as the sight of her covering her eyes down there. It isn't exactly relief, because this whole situation is still phenomenally fucked up for her, but I am selfishly glad to not have to see her body... crumpled, just like her mother.

"Hey sweetheart," My voice quivers slightly now, but I quickly swallow. No. No. Now, you must be strong Y/N. "Its just me. Your Daddy was looking for you, and couldn't find you! It got him worried!"

"I... I don't wanna see Daddy. He hurt Mommy." Kathy doesn't remove her hands from her face, and stays firmly by the wall- too far away for anyone to grab. My heart sinks.

Slowly straightening up again, I try to take that piece of information in. Turning to the doorway, I see Freddy there. he must have followed me. I didn't even notice. Slowly, and quietly ferociously, I say; "She saw?!"

He has the good sense to look embarrassed, even if it is just to make fun of me. "It was spur of the moment... " He shrugs. "I didn't have time to get a babysitter!"

What a fucking excuse. For gods sake.

I'm definitely dealing with a psycho- if that was even a question before now.

Swiftly, I look down under the bed again, because I'm afraid that if I continue to engage with him- I'll scream, and I'll lose my breath, and I'll scare Kathy even more. She's at the forefront of my mind; That's all I can think about.

But what to do with her after I get her out from under this bed, I don't know. I cant give her back to her father... but I cant hand her over to the police either because that would involve telling them about Loretta, and... Freddy will definitely kill me, for that.

This is a nightmare of a situation.

I'm just opening my mouth to say something - what, I don't know yet, - when she speaks, instead. "Is he there?"

"... Yes." I wont lie to her; That would be treating her with not nearly as much respect as she deserves.

When she takes a deep breath and rubs her eyes, as if just trying to keep herself together, my heart clenches. God... and to think I might not have picks up Freddy's call today. I would have been leaving her with this. For the first time today, I'm morbidly glad I came.

She speaks in that loud, hissy way that kids think is a whisper. "Can he... can you please make him go away?"

Immediately I straighten back up and look to Freddy again, my eyebrows raised halfway up my forehead. Like well? "Get out."

"I don't think you're in a position to make demands here, bi- "

"Do you want Kathy to live down there now!??" I snap, trying not to be scared. Not really feeling scared, actually. Just happy to have a reason to tell him to get the hell away from me.

A deep frown creases his mouth, deeply unhappy about the situation, but steps back. I only hear him step out of the way of the door, but its good enough. Quickly, I get up and close the door - fighting with myself not to slam it, - and lock it.

Then I return to the floor, and see this time Kathy has uncovered her eyes. She looks so small, smaller then she actually is, and she looks like she's shaking. Little red bows and piggy tails in her hair are messy from crawling under the bed. "He's gone, sweetheart. And I locked the door."

She just nods, so I take the silence as a chance to offer my hand to her. "Take my hand, sweetie? Come on out from under the bed. Its cold down there, and no one wants you getting sick." I need to upkeep the family friend bit, I need to sound caring and collected. I need her to trust me.

Her big eyes, not Loretta's colour or Freddy's, look nervous as hell. And she shakes her head.

Taking a deep breath, and I conjure all the sincerity as I can. And mean it. My eyes soften and I try really hard, to resent myself as someone trustworthy- which is hard, seeing as I've never really been that. I mean, I'm cheating on my husband. I told Carter today the same lie I told Harrison when i knew I was going to be late. The only person I think who knows the truth behind all my lies is Freddy. That says something about a person, that the only person who knows them is a psychopath.

But I want to, I need to, be good for this little girl. And there's no time for me turn my life around so it has to start with this. How fucked is that?

"... I promise, I'll take care of you. He wont hurt you."

After a few whole minutes, in which I stay silent because yes she's a child, but she's still thinking, she crawls over and takes my hand, letting me lead her out. Crawling into my lap as I cross my legs under her, she buries her face in my shirt- hiding. "You promise?"

Taking a deep breath, because I've really done it now, I offer my pinky for her to see if she turned her head. I know Freddy's listening to all of this through the wall, but I try not to freak out. "Pinky swear?"

"Pinky swear." She peaks out from my shirt, and curls her little finger around mine. Okay... "Y/N... I'm scared."

"Yeah... Me too, sweetie."

What am I going to do?

#Freddy Krueger x Fem!Reader #Freddy Krueger x Reader #Slashers #Slashers x Reader #Fem Reader #Freddy Krueger #Loretta Krueger #Katherine Krueger #Kathrine Krueger #Maggie Burroughs #Oneshot #Freddy Krueger x Reader Oneshot

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