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ryry-rebel · 10 months

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First Kiss W/ Asahi Azumane

Asahi Azumane x Reader Headcannon

Warnings- None, pure fluff

Pronouns- None

Word Count- 815

My Masterlist -> Masterlist

🎡✨🎡✨🎡✨🎡✨🎡✨🎡✨🎡✨🎡✨🎡✨

100% Soft boy

He would never initiate the first kiss, never, and you can’t convince me otherwise

He is the type of guy to never initiate any romantic gesture

Actually, I think you were the one who asked him out first. Poor boy would be scared to ask you

What if you said no? What if his teammates laughed at him? Asahi would just rather stick to himself.

With that being said, he was an absolute wreck during your first kiss, definitely didn’t go as planned.

I think he could sense when you were trying to kiss him.

Like picture this- the two of you decided to go to an amusement park. After a day of riding all the rides you could think of, you saved the best for last, the Ferris wheel. It was dark out too, so that really set the romantic mood.

You two boarded the cart and immediately you grabbed his hand.

Poor boi tensed up even from that.

Anyway- you two had made it to the top. There was a lake in the distance, lights surrounded the whole thing. It was a rather beautiful sight. All the lights on the amusement ride attractions were on, very beautiful. There was a light breeze that ruffled your hair (and his)

The mood was perfect

“Hey Asahi?” You would ask as you snuggled into his side.

Dude would be sweating bullets. Not used to the physical affection, especially in public. Even tho you guys are literally at the top of the Ferris wheel, and no one is paying attention to you guys

“Mhm?”

You would look into his big, beautiful brown eyes, and he would stare into yours.

Did I mention how easy it was to get lost in his lovely, alluring eyes?

Asahi would gaze down at your lips. He wants to kiss you; trust me he does. But, he can’t bring himself to do it.

What if he’s a bad kisser? What if his breath stinks? (It Doesn’t).

Then, you would grab his face, caressing his soft cheek with one hand as you slowly leaned in for a kiss…

NOPE

Asahi would turn away, and you ended up kissing his cheek.

“Look at that ride! I think we missed it. We should definitely ride that one before we head home.”

You just got cock blocked by your own date

The night would continue like that.

Every attempt you made he would shut it down. You started to think he just didn’t want to kiss you, but that couldn’t have been further from the truth.

So, as you guys were walking back to his car, you decided to just ask him.

“Why dont you wanna kiss me.”

Asahi would stop dead in his tracks. That question is definitely going to haunt him.

His face would turn bright red, and he would start sweating profusely again. His hands would be all clammy and his voice would be all high pitched and squeaky.

The dude is about to shit himself Ngl

“What do you mean?” (He’s playing dumb, he 100 % knows what you mean). He’s just scared ok 😭

“Every time I try to kiss you, you shut me down. Do you know how many times I’ve kissed your cheek today?”

Now he feels bad.

He’s stressing you out and he never meant to.

He would take a deep breath. He knows he has to tell you. (He’s definitely going to stutter).

“I… Well, I…”

You kind of just stood there with your hands on your hips, definitely not helping the situation. It just scares him more.

“I… I want to kiss you. But… Well, I’m… I’m s-scared. I don’t want to mess it up. I don’t want to be a bad kisser.”

Asahi would hang his head low in defeat.

But you were there to pick it back up.

You would hold his face gently in your hands, rubbing your thumb across his cheek. His face would be hot to the touch, but you wouldn’t mind.

“I don’t care if you’re a good kisser. I promise you baby, there is nothing to be scared of. We can both learn as we go.”

That’s all he needed to hear.

You slowly moved in, and when your lips FINALLY found their way to his, sparks were flying.

The whole damn world lit up for you two. Don’t tell him people were watching you guys kiss. You are in the parking lot after all.

There was no tongue. The kiss was short and chaste, but it was full of unsaid words and love.

Unbreakable and undeniable love

#haiku #haikyuu #haikyu x reader #haikyū!!#asahi azumane x reader #asahi x reader fluff #asahi azumane x reader fluff #asahi azumane #azumane asahi #haikyu fluff #haikyuu fluff #headcanon #haikyu headcanons #haikyuu headcanons #anime fanfic #fanfic #fancition #haikyu fanfiction

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dra-dra-dracula · 9 months

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I saw The Last Voyage of the Demeter with a friend and by god did I kinda hate it. This is the first ever Dracula esque movie I've ever seen and it just did not deliver. And I know I KNOW we've never had a faithful adaptation of Dracula. But I feel with this bit we could've had something GOOD. This was not good.

But the effects were fucking AMAZING.

Spoilers below.

Random woman there to only explain what/who Dracula is, but does it badly? Eh.

Little boy for shock value? Eh.

Dracula looking like a shriveled scrotum creature instead of a man that isn't quite human enough?

A SURVIVOR?????

They tried too hard to make Anna helpless and then suddenly badass. I did not care that she died or that she died like that. Honestly there were very few I cared about that died at all because we didn't get a good enough reason to care.

They did the Captain and the First Mate dirty. Especially with that ICONIC moment we should've had with the Captain but it wasn't like.. it was ruined when they untied him. That someone else gave him the crucifix, that it wasn't his own belief. The First Mate so fucking bound to the ship, despite that we know in the book he'd rather die to nature than to what is in the ship.

Like theres so much I kinda hated about this movie, and I was very excited to see it. I did appreciate them Going There with Clemens and his struggles. But I wish we got that kind of characterization with the rest of the crew as well. Instead of just 'horny' 'religious' 'angy' 'stupid russian'.

Especially as Clemens talks so much of learning the stars, they don't even fucking USE THAT. Or have him realize he can't use it with all the fog like MAN WHAT WAS THAT LINE FOR??

Honestly I was hoping they were going to throw Toby overboard when it was down to the last few. Rather him a 'swift' death in the tides than to be livestock for a monster. But.. no.

The music was okay but there was too much focus on sting notes and jump scares to really build up the tension of this movie.

And then ending with Clemens surviving and like 'i'mma find him and kill him'? I dunno I think a better ending would've been a somber moment of the funeral. Or of Mina and Lucy watching it.

Maybe it's on me, my expectations were too high.

The actor playing the first mate was hot tho. David Dastmalchian did a great job.

#the last voyage of the demeter #spoilers #demeter spoilers #love that everyone's split on this movie #everyone loves it or hates it lol

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thewertsearch · 2 years

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Asks Compilation 09/06

God, I really should, shouldn’t I? I’ve heard only good things about it, and obviously I love alt-self shenanigans. I might go in a week or two - it’s been way too long since I took a trip to the cinema.

Yeah!!! Welcome to the party! It’s a good time for you to catch up, since I’m pausing for a week or so before I start Act 5. (I’ll probably start it late next week, but that’s subject to change!)

Illuminating, eh? *Adds 5 points to the Light Player column of my notepad*

Never too late to analyze something you love! And doing a close reading of something you’ve read before sometimes works even better, because you know exactly how things are going to pay off. You can see all the foreshadowing you missed!

The obvious answer is Dave and Bro, but I think the most likely Player to do the tbh stare is actually AT.

I think he stared at his computer exactly like this when Dave rapped him into oblivion.

Totally missed it. We don’t learn muck Mark Twain Lore here, but it seems that in the universe of Homestuck, he lived a double life...

Who knew not having a schedule to speak of would ever be a positive? My old manager clearly didn’t know what he was talking about.

It really does keep happening. I’ve already made an OC, and it’s a good thing I don’t write fanfic, because otherwise I’d be fending the writing impulses off with a stick.

[ it goes around a lot as a rumor. I think people get confused because the team put effort into making it canon compliant - and it also uses an official (unused) HS song. 99% sure Hussie never said anything about it tho... - Cat ]

Ah, I see. Still, it definitely sounds like a fan project worth checking out!

Honestly, my excitement is immeasurable. SAHLEE is evolving...

Been a while since I watched any new ones, but yeah, I’m a huge anime fan! I actually re-watched Mob Psycho 100 last week in preparation for the new season. The final two arcs of the manga are fantastic, and I, for one, cannot wait.

I watched Your Name a couple of weeks ago, and I’d definitely recommend that. It’s gorgeous, and the story goes to some places that I didn’t expect it to, going in.

I could talk a lot about the movies I like - and I will, if people are interested - but it’d take a while to gather my thoughts. Like I said before, it’s hard for me to pick out favorites.

They’re completely unnecessary - but then again, so are their glasses and headbands. It is my intuition that Sburb wouldn’t make it so easy for Players to realize that they weren’t born naturally, since they’re supposed to learn about their destiny themselves. I think they probably have bellybuttons.

All I’m getting from it is that Life does not equal Doom, which I’m sure is too obvious to be the right answer. In other words, this is just another intriguing hint about what’s up with Aspects.

Aw, fantastic, I’m happy you enjoyed!! Even learning some basic computer science reveals a whole new dimension to this comic. If you ever want any pointers, or links to resources to learn more, let me know!

That game’s a real standout among idle games. Last time I played, I’d just finished completing all the game’s Milestones, and I won’t spoil you on what happens next ;)

It’s funny how things work out. Weird chains of causality aren’t something that Homestuck has a monopoly on!

I have to wonder what Toby would be up to now without Homestuck’s influence. Would we have got radically different versions of Undertale/Deltarune?

Definitely going to do it! I’m actually probably going to catch up on it in the next week or two, before Act 5.

...yeah, that tracks.

The question of probability as it applies to Homestuck’s cosmology is kind of complicated. Sburb’s lore seems to treat things like the Paradox Clones as certain outcomes, with a probability of 1, even as its multiverse disproves this.

This is the kind of thing I really want to see more of, going forward. Just what are the real rules here?

Universal translation is as good an explanation as any!

It would be kind of funny if, when the kids complete the game and exit the Incipisphere, all the trolls’ messages instantly turn into gibberish, because they never actually shared a language.

lmaoo considering how the trolls talk to these kids, especially in earlier conversations, I think it’s more likely they found a human disetiquette book!

My favorite is probably a more saturated version of my text color - something like this:

I think you can probably get a pretty picture out of any color if you use it right, but I’ve never really been into muddy brown.

I need you to know that I spent an hour earlier trying to edit Jack Noir into that Eggman scene I referenced earlier, so I could post it with this ask. I failed, but this ask succeeded in making me laugh my ass off.

If anyone here hasn’t watched the Snapcube fandubs, I implore you - check this shit out. You won’t be sorry!

She’s no man!

I actually like that more than the ‘8 looks like a snowman’ explanation that I came up with. That ‘quarters = 1/4′ thing is a good secondary pun, too.

This is a good point, regarding why Jade’s prototyping didn’t show up on Prospit’s iconography. Whatever comes out of Jade’s kernel, it will enter the Spire of a planet in ruins. There might not even be anyone to see it arrive.

#full liveblog #asks #act 4 #classpect

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eureka-its-zico · 8 months

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Hiiiii, I’m 🧀 baaack. I felt an energy disturbance in the Force and turns out there is a sneak peek for the next chapter and oh my God… I choked on my tea 🫠😂

I was HOPING for a conversation like that. And I did think Nami would be the one who would point something like that out to Zoro too. Idk, Nami just seems like the person who’d give the best advise 🤷🏻‍♀️

And honestly, something about dancing in fics whilst the guy watches just hits different for me. I am sappy and just melt at parts where the the guy’s interest makes an absolute fool of themselves on the dancefloor (think it’s because I dance like an absolute fool too 🤷🏻‍♀️😂 It’s all about having fun!!!).

I am so looking forward for the next part and it’s so hard with this Zoro brain rot that I’ve been having 🫠😂 I have a course assignment to submit before end of Thursday and then I have a midterm that I can take whenever from Friday until Tuesday and just… I have to admit, I even started writing again to deal with this obssession that I have been having 🤦‍♀️ I cannot say I’ve been productive when it comes to a lot of my adult responsibilities…

As for Tumblr in 2009 - I have to admit, I was a teenager then and didn’t care too much about Tumblr then 😂 I was active between 2011-2012 and going crazy for a lot of bands so my dash before the purge was… a lot of bands that I am not really listening to anymore, BUT it was a lovely trip down the memory lane. It wasn’t fun to remember how cringe of a teenager I was tho 😂 I’ve been on and off Tumblr for years, I have to admit. And I keep coming back to it at times where life gets a bit too hard.

Last time I sent in the ask, I wasn’t doing well and I still am not the best mentally though I’ll get there. Thank you for your kind words, they meant a lot to me over the weekend ❤️

The cherry on top, and this is funny to me because life sometimes gets ridiculous, was last night when my keyboard and mouse put up their middle fingers and stopped working at the same time whilst I was in the middle of something 😂 And not to the point that I need to replace batteries or charge them, but actually replace them 🤣 It’s alright though, I work in tech and I have learned that technology does this to me out of sheer spite 🤷🏻‍♀️

This sneak peek has brought me such joy and I am smiling like a fool and I don’t think I’ll be able to fall asleep again tonight 😂

Thank you for sharing this with us! And I hope you are having a lovely start to your week! ❤️

Osiyo oginalii,

How wonderful it is to hear from you!!! I love that you used a Star Wars reference in relation to knowing I had posted something 🤣 but I am sorry it made you choke on your tea (this also feels like a low key st reference).

Nami really is the best person to bring that kind of stuff up. She’s the most observant of the crew, because she has so much to lose in her mind. So, it’s made her hyper aware of everything around her. Luffy was just a wildcard she never saw coming. I feel like she’s always trying to get a read on everybody, and because of that she just notices what others might be trying to hide. Like feelings 😬

I am like you! I have been struggling to complete all my uni work because I’m having my first lung procedure this Friday. So, I’ve been struggling to do all my homework before then and also work on publishing this week before I’m out for the weekend. IF you do write something, please let me know. I would absolutely love to read whatever you create 🖤

It makes me sad you are still having a hard time, but just know I am here for you. I know it isn’t much, but if there is anything I can do to help keep your mind off it or make you feel a tad better I will always do my best. I sincerely hope this week is kinder to you in some regard.

If my keyboard or anything went out on my computer I would DIE. I spent 2k+ plus on that thing to play games, and I would cry tears of pure agony. Tell your mouse and keyboard we have absolutely no time for this foolishness and that they need to get it together ASAP.

I hope you got some sleep these past few days! Your health is so important! Again, I am sending you all the hugs. Much love 🖤

#thecheesyreader #answered #Chaos in Their Bones review #I am sorry it took me so long to get to my inbox #it’s been a stressful and trying few days

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minimoefoe · 2 years

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Thirteen Era Rewatch: Once, Upon Time

I'm re-watching Thirteen's era in lead up to the Centenary and since this is likely going to be my last full re-watch for a while I thought I'd do a post on each ep where I just go over all the things I love, hate or just have some general thoughts on.

When S13 aired I made a posts similar to this after re-watching each ep before the next one came out. The Once, Upon Time post can be found HERE.

I love the first scene where we find out what 13 is thinking. Pretty cool

This scene has always shat me up bc I feel like we barely ever see Yaz laugh and here she’s fully laughing idek. I know it’s not Actually Yaz which ofc adds to why her vibe is different but idk something about it gets me

One time someone genuinely said that this moment was Chib spreading some kind of agenda about how there’s something wrong with ppl who aren’t married and I was like…she’s clearly just messing with him/flirting a bit are you actually braindead

Yaz why is your coworker getting all up in your business like that hm

This actually kills me

I love when the Tunnel guy rocks up ngl

So Yaz is defo in her future house, right? I wonder if it will come back in PotD or if will end up just being a potential future of hers and she doesn’t actually end up there. I think seeing it again would be really cool tbh

Cutting between 13 and Fugitive is cool. Also showing Fugitive while saying this line was a Choice if ever I’ve seen one

I kinda wish we saw more Fugitive in that scene, like once it’s established that 13 is there re-living it, we cut to seeing Fugitive all the time but also I do like the cutting between both so meh it’s not the end of the world

Old swarm looks gross as fuck tbh

I love that switching between 13 and Fugitive kinda shows the differences in them. Like when 13 is threatening Swarm and Azure she comes off as way more aggressive whereas Fugitive is just calm as fuck saying what needs to be said idk. It’s cool

Not to be going on about missing shots lmao but there’s no way all those Cybermen missed their shots AND Bel managed to kill them all. I’m not a freak so idc that much but I do think it’s kinda funny

I like that we know why Vinder was sent out there and I like that part the Grand Serpent plays in it but idk why the GS needs to be in the series anymore than that tbh. Idk. I can’t fully remember what part he plays in the next few eps so I guess we’ll see if I change my mind

Obsessed with how desperate she is here. Also the way Yaz says ‘all right’ after. Ugh. Like we know Yaz has been getting annoyed with the Doctor this series but she’s still trying her best to help even tho 13 keeps shutting her out

‘Reintroduced’… So, she was the one who let Swarm escape? Is that right? Am I dumb? Bc when I watched 13.01 I was like well why did he choose now to escape, like what changed. But I guess this is it lmao

Do as you’re told !! Also love that Dan doesn’t listen to what she says straight away bc he doesn’t really know her and like doesn’t care as much about what she’s telling him to do

I don’t get what’s funny/bad about this line ngl

I also don’t get how she hasn’t seen Vinder in ages but she is pregnant and not even showing. Like I know she’s not human so maybe it works a bit differently but idk, it’s a bit off

This ep has never been my fave of the series but idk. I don’t really have anything massive to complain about. It’s cool. I think it does pretty good at switching between each memory. At one point I used to think Bel and Vinder’s story was a waste of time bc it’s not massively plot related and part of me does still think that a bit, like I know that’s how serialised shows work, introducing different stories, but like, it’s not fully necessary is it. I don’t mind it too much tho bc I do agree that not every story NEEDS to be related massively to the plot and I do like the stuff with Bel and Vinder but

lso time taken away from 13 Yaz and Dan is never gonna be 10/10 in my book

#doctor who #thirteenth doctor #yasmin khan #dan lewis #dw meta #nataliechats

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mi-spark · 1 year

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ty for the tag @honrupi this was super fun :D EDIT: you might not even remember tagging me for this lol, my Goodness this is old... most of this is 2020 mimi talking.

Rules: Answer the ten questions, write your own ten questions, tag ten people.

i’ve also drawn a few small doodles to kinda help separate these large chunks of text 👀 enjoy

1. What’s the first fandom you can remember being a part of and would you consider yourself still a part of it? hmm y’know i was just thinkin about how involved i’ve actually been in fandoms, and i gotta say i’m pretty inactive in them (as in i don’t produce a lot of “content” for them) and tend to just enjoy the series by myself or with a friend. i consider my contributions to a fandom to be my art for it and i don’t think i post art frequently enough to really Be a member of a fandom. but i don’t mind that!

to actually answer the question though, my first was likely pokemon. specifically mystery dungeon because hero x partner videos on youtube (LMFAO) were what introduced me to deviantart, and then the ✨rest of the internet✨. i still love and draw pokemon, but i don’t think fandom culture is really for me LMAO so no i don’t– and never really have– considered myself part of any fandom.

2. What’s the best compliment you’ve ever received? Alternatively, what would make you happiest to be complimented about? omg i immediately know the answer to this. somebody once said to me, “you’re like a sunflower: tall and pretty” like WHAT!! 😭😭💖💞💘 anyway that’s when sunflowers became my favorite flower 🌻

3. Do you want to be famous? absolutely not, i wouldn’t be able to tolerate such a constant and tremendous amount of attention. but i wouldn’t mind a small following! i kinda like the idea of inspiring a small group of people... anyway it’s kinda the same reason why cult followings > giant fandoms

4. What’s something you always wished you could be good at? oof, many things. i wish i was generally more crafty (cosplay, plush-making, etc.), i wish i knew my way around some sorta weapon tbh, like archery? and i wish i was handy with tools n such. ooh and storytelling, i have a lotta doubts abt my storytelling abilities. OH and i wish i had more common sense/street smarts T_T) i’m aware a lot of these develop with practice, but like.. omg my brain is always so full, setting aside time is difficult LOL. but hopefully i’ll get to try them someday :”)

5. If you were given complete freedom to plan your dream vacation, where would you go and what would you do there? it’s nothing really unique but i just really wanna be someplace tropical in a quiet and remote area. buy fruit from local street markets, hike up scenic mountain trails. Y’know. and just fuggin paddleboard and swim and relax on the sand all day long (the coarse kind of sand that feels like a sugar scrub). also my dog has to be there with me. and it’s a permanent vacation. i will live there.

6. How did you first end up on Tumblr? an artist i’ve looked up to since.. forever left deviantart for this hellsite (affectionate), so i followed. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ now they (mostly) left for twitter, and i followed them there too, but turned tf back. we already know how abysmal twitter is. edit: and it’s really only gotten worse huh

7. What was the last piece of media you saw/read/played that left a memorable impact on you? it was probably when i decided to watch an lp of the last of us a while back. i rarely cry on the spot from any sort of narrative, but that one left me in pieces from the beginning. that was an intense game throughout so i’d say it left quite an impact on my heart ;; aggressively ignores part two edit: the show’s good tho!! i wonder if it’ll fix part two. also this art is from 2020

8. What are you looking forward to in the foreseeable future? it’s not guaranteed to happen but i’d love to move into a place with a close friend or two, and we’re all doing our best and cooking for each other and playing video games together,,, i’d really like that. edit: since writing this i’ve actually begun some moving plans with a group of friends WAAAHH i’m so excited :D we’re going to test our roommate compatibility this summer!

9. What’s a random fun fact that you’ve learned recently? my friend kinda hinted to me a while back that a part of the ancient cistern dungeon from skyward sword is based off a super cool japanese short story?? it’s called “the spider’s thread,” if you’re unfamiliar with the story and you’ve played ss, just read a synopsis of the story and it’s very clear where the inspiration comes from. this was just such a cool reference

10. What’s a piece of advice that you’ve always found useful? hmmm i can’t think of any especially profound advice to share, but the phrase “lefty loosey righty tighty” helps me remember which way to screw screws, twist a hose faucet, etc.

imma tag @invader-777, @sneepity-snoop-snorpity-sneep, @smashwolfen, aaand any mutuals n followers who are interested ^_^)b

my questions are under the cut!

1. are you (or would you prefer to be) an early bird or a night owl, and what do you enjoy about being up at those hours?

2. tell me your favorite animal :D

3. you get a million bucks. hooray! what do you do with your cash?

4. what is your favorite piece of instrumental music? feel free to list multiple.

5. describe your dream home!

6. what introduced you to the internet?

7. share your current favorite thing! maybe an album you have on repeat? or a game you’ve been playing lots lately?

8. do you have a collection? if so, of what?

9. what’s an aesthetic/theme/style you enjoy?

10. how do you feel about reading books?

#long post #tagged #my drafts are out of control #this was at the very bottom #that's why i'm only posting it now DJHFDKNFG #they're getting better though! i started out with like 1300+ drafts YIKES #and now as of queueing this post there's about 350 ovo)b

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neptunium134 · 1 year

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15 questions, 15 mutuals

Tagged by @leatafandom, thanks hun!

1. Are you named after anyone?

Not specifically. My mum heard the name on TV and liked it, and she wanted the Irish spelling because my nan’s family is Irish

2. When was the last time you cried?

Oof, honestly can’t remember. Maybe last month? Not sure what on though

3. Do you have any kids?

Only my fictional characters

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot?

No, never (yes, all the time)

5. What's the first thing you notice about people?

Depends on person to person. Usually how comfortable they are around me, or sometimes tiny little quirks they might have when they’re talking

6. Eye colour?

Blue-grey-green

7.Scary movies or happy endings?

I guess happy endings? Don’t really watch a lot of scary films tbf

8. Any special talents?

Does knowing pretty much all the lyrics to all of Westlife’s songs count? Or that I can flip-flop between TV shows while still knowing exactly what’s doing on? If not, no. I am a boring-ass person

9. Where were you born?

In a hospital several days early

10. What are your hobbies?

I say writing but I haven’t done writing in like a month (even tho I do creative writing at uni... eek), but I also read a lot (of fanfic) and I play hockey (when I can actually get to training), but I also over-analyse a lot of shit (some I’ve posted here, which I’ll need to get back to) and I watch a decent amount of shows

11. Have you any pets?

No, my brother’s allergic to fur and we go away too much for any other kind of animal. I do want a tabby cat and a dalmatian when I get my own place, though

12. What sports do you/have you play(ed)?

Hockey is the only current one I play, but I did play netball in secondary school as well

13. How tall are you?

5′2″ or 157.5 cm. I am a smol human being

14. Favourite subject in school?

History has and always will be, but I did also love Media once I could take it at GCSE

15. Dream job?

The big one is being an author, but realistically, anything in the writing profession. I do have being a teacher on standby, but I’m hesitant to persue it as it isn’t my first choice job and I think kids should have teachers who want to be teachers, not because all else failed

I tag @bwoahtastic, @kyoukai-kanata, @jxmieswxnter, @hecticwinter, @jules-and-company, @grilledcolgate, @minnnnnimin, @justyouwaitsunshine (I know it’s not 15 but I didn’t want to do 15)

#tagged #q&a

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feralgremlinchild · 1 month

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Tw death, medical, child custody

(also I can’t remember how to do a read more so heads up it’s a long post)

I’ve been gone a while, I kept meaning to return but everything in life just kept getting worse. Taking care of my mother became more of a challenge, and the past 6 months she was in hospitals and skilled nursing homes. We had some good times together, I took her to see the eras tour in theater because she absolutely loved Taylor swift.

My mother died a week and a half ago, thankfully she was aware of what was happening and she was ready for it. She had unfortunately already been legally dead and revived and intubated before she had a chance to sign a dnr. She hated being intubated, but I tried to help as best I could to make communication possible for her the seven days she was intubated. I made her a talking board.

I tried my best to treat her with dignity and make sure she had the little comforts the past few months. I drew signs for her hospital wall, I brought her her favorite stuffed animal, I clipped and filed her nails, I brought my (retired) service dog to see her because she adored him and he always made her feel better. Helped order her food. Found solutions to little problems like an elastic band for her watch instead of a buckle. Assistive devices and technology. It never felt like a chore, it wasn’t a decision I had to make, I just did things.

She had finally decided a couple months ago that she was not going to take more of her dilaudid than prescribed. And she was actually sticking to that. I had been waiting for that my entire life and I was so so proud of her. She was trying very hard. She wanted to see my niece again, she wanted to be around a while longer. Up until the beginning of March, the doctors told us they weren’t sure how much time she had left, but it could be months or even a year, it depended on her recovery. Her body’s ability to recover. In the end though it was just too tired, she’d been sick her entire life and she couldn’t recover from this last infection.

My niece’s dad allowed her to visit the hospital a couple days before my mother passed. I didn’t get to see the kid because I wasn’t at the hospital, I had already gone home. The kid had been given a phone for her birthday a few days earlier, and has been allowed to contact us so far. I haven’t seen her in person since December, but I’ll see her on Friday at the service. We’ve been texting though, mostly about games we both play and inside jokes.

I had to buy a black dress because my old one ripped. I have lost a lot of weight recently anyways, it probably wouldn’t have fit. It turns out stress and grieving can take the pounds off you even when an eating disorder couldn’t. It’s not exactly happy weight loss. I haven’t been celebrating it. But the weight did need to come off, so maybe at least my joints will be a little happier.

Now I have to find a job at some point in the next couple of months. The insurance money won’t last forever, and I had always planned on getting a job after my mother passed. She had been my full time job for years. I’m going to get a job, help my dad sell the house, and then move out of Texas. If all goes well I will be in New England this time next year. It’s a big move but I need to get as far away as possible, I’ve been dreaming of this for years and years and it’s finally time to start making steps towards it.

Also both of my big dogs have large tumors and I have no money for removal or treatment.

Also also my cousin’s wedding is in less than two weeks and it’s a 5 hour drive minimum and I did get a dress and it’s good but I do not feel like celebrating anything right now. The guy is nice tho, very kind and has what the church people call a heart of service. They’re cute together. And my cousin is great and I love her and I grew up with her almost like a sister, even going to the same schools. But I’m just not in a happy wedding mood. I’m going anyway of course.

#text post #personal #tw death #tw med talk #tw child custody #tw ed #long post #tw animal illness #tw dead parent

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nouies · 4 months

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hey hey, lou! 🩷

i keep asking you about movies/tv series and songs, but i just add them to my whatchlist, because i haven't been able to consume new things for a while. but soon i will watch/listen to what you have recommended me, so expect a feedback. 😝

thank you for the advice and for believing in me! i really appreciate it! and know whatever you decide to create for your giftee, it will turn out wonderful! 🎀

it's so amazing how one person can give so much comfort to millions of people around the world. louis is just so precious. the energy he has, the way he talks, the love he gives. just thinking about him and writing this, warms my heart. 🥺

i have been feeling the same way, like i'm not contributing to the fandom. that's the other reason i signed up for the event. i was thinking about making smau, but it's so hard and i don't have good ideas. but one day maybe. it's one of my new year's resolutions as well. i don't know if i will ever try to make gifs tho, but who knows... 🌷

this is actually a great question. i have read a lot of fics with tag actor louis, but i have never asked myself in what kind of movie i would have liked to see him. probably in crime series. louis as a detective. or in tv series about doctors, for example the grey's anatomy. louis as a doctor. i definitely don't see him in romcom, even tho if he plays as the business woman coming back to hometown and his boyfriend from high school. like the basic scenarios, but louis playing the woman's role. he is too soft to play the farmer or something like that. i don't know if i'm making sense or i'm just living in a fic at this point. i hope i managed to give you a reasonable answer. 🤐

my question for the day: if you had the opportunity to go back in time, what would you change and why? 🐽

hope you have a lovely day,

- your valentine 😙

hi lovely! how are you?

don’t feel obligated to watch those things hehehe even if you decide to watch other things, let me know bc i’m on the same boat. i forgot to mention that i’ve been watching k-dramas as well! the latest was “romance is a bonus book” and i loved it.

i know we both will create great things! i have faith in us <333 what i said abt feeling like i was not contributing was before i truly interacted with the fandom. if you reblog/retweet gifsets, photos, ART, or write comments under fics and talk abt them on your blog, or with smaus if you quote them with your reactions, that’s contributing! without those interactions, ppl wouldn’t know if you’re enjoying what they’re posting so feedback and promotion are a great contribution in the fandom. at least that’s how i see it.

i made a tiny smau last month and if you want, i can help you with that once you reveal to me who you are heheh.

abt louis being a comfort person you’re so right! he’s honestly (besides my friends) the main reason i’m still here and i love him so much 🤧

omg i would love to see him as a detective or a doctor! or like a spy maybe? idk if he will ever try his luck at acting, but i’d definitely love to see his work!

do you want a funny answer or a deep answer? heheh tbh i’m always making weird decisions, so even going back in time to last weekend to chance some of them would be fine with me. but if i truly think abt it, i would probably go back to my high school years to spend more time with my mum, and to socialise more, and maybe to change my career path. although if i wouldn’t have studied my degree, i wouldn’t have met my best friend and i wouldn’t have become a 1d fan so 🤷🏻‍♀️

what abt you? where would you go?

have a great day, my friend! it’s finally the weekend 🥳 take care

#blvalentine #anonymous #answered

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sassafras--manson · 9 months

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wrote all this yesterday and thought it just didn’t post and i was like… cool. par for the course.

found it in my drafts 🙄🥲

———————

so i’m going to this whole fuckin warehouse dance party tn. i’ve been staying in a lot lately partially bc i always feel socially burnt out even tho i’ve been turning down social shit for kind of a while, and partially bc.. idk i just feel so sad all the fuckin time that nothing sounds like fun, even the things i used to do and have fun doing. unfortunately taking all the me time i’ve been desperate for has made me even More anxious to leave my apt, so that adds another layer onto my reasons for staying in.

but tn i’m going to a fuckin warehouse party, held by ppl i’ve gotten to know through these parties of theirs, and i’m kind of looking forward to it but the sad brain is going “what if you stop looking forward to it in the next few hours?” and i’m scared of it all falling down around me.

it helps that it’s a sunny day, i don’t think i could’ve even accepted the invite if it was shitty n gray.

the other day danny n i day drank and recorded a song that i sang, and even though it was just for fun it made me feel really cool like i was getting a little version of my fantasy of fronting an 80s punk/hair metal band. a knockoff version, but more real than my whitesnake karaoke.

the night after we recorded it i went out to see some friends play at a dive bar in the neighborhood, and was surprised to feel like going when i got the invite to go out. it felt like something i would’ve skipped, considering my mood for the last couple months. but i felt like going, and wearing something as casual as the event but with a hint of and the aire of 80s rockstar. it was a really chill night and i enjoyed myself, took some (what i hope will be) cool photos on my old film camera, and chatted w my friends. and even afterwards i was feeling a low key version of awe that i just wanted to go and i did.

so many things i’ve been doing lately are because even though i don’t feel like it, i feel like i should support my friends - a lot of my social shit is based on how just about all of my friends are in bands- i Want to support them too, obviously, but i Don’t want to get dressed, talk, or smile. maybe because this show had such a lesser sense of obligation than the rest. maybe my-interest-in-going being the only factor took the.. preasure?.. off? but mostly i think i was just still in the afterglow of feeling cool. and of having made something, of having been creative in a way i never let myself be before, of having stepped out of my comfort zone and dipping a toe into a part of myself i wish i could be more often without being embarrassed.

tbh i think i’m in a little lingering shockwave of that afterglow. i skipped another show last night to stay in and add rhinestone spiderwebs to a pair of shorts n watch 80s movies. not any part of me was receptive to the idea of being social. but that’s the nature of the wave, i guess.

i’m building an outfit for tonight and am flirting w the possibility of wearing this skirt i got off depop cuz it looks like it belongs on an 80s video vixen. i’m not much of a skirt/dress wearer but i had to have it. it’s leather and zips up the back, and wraps over itself in the front w these two big fuckin ornate (for lack of a less hoity toity sounding word) buckles. if i chicken out i’ll sub out for emotional support shorts that i wear like everyday - loose black denim cutoffs that Are from the 80s, that i added pyramid studs to on one front pocket. i have all day to try to psych myself up for this outfit, but like i said, i feel more n more afraid to even leave the apt, so the way i tend to cope w that is to wear something i know i feel like ~myself~ in. those cutoffs are the security blanket of clothes. also, like, i want to be an occasional skirt person but every time i try it out it adds so much femininity to my look that it makes me it makes uncomfortable and idk how to balance it out outfit-wise yet, i don’t have the experience. but i’m off on a tangent. anyway, i’m surprised i’m even considering wearing it, and i think it must be that last bit of the afterglow hitting.

tbh this whole fuckin thing has been one tangent after the next, and i’ve got thoughts that go on off the last, but i’m kind of tired of thinking, so i’m cutting it off. let it be, ferrin.

i’m going to a social thing tonight with friends and outfits and dancing and i wanna do it but i’m also kinda scared of going, but i feel good enough going that i’m going to try, even though going to this is skipping a lot of steps between staying in and this degree of going out. but it’s nice to feel like doing something. i’m always wary of that feeling but supposedly that’s the fucking secret, is to enjoy it for what it is and while it lasts.

#personal #rambling

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stfuviolet1 · 9 months

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Thank you for showing up, Fey.

This picture was taken on last Saturday night (12/08/23) where I attended a Theather played by my bestfriend’s husband, Dinesh. At first I was hesitant to go considering of how self-conscious I am with my physical now. But I’m tired of seeing my friendship falling apart. Apparently me keeping on bailing out has made a lot of my friends upset. Numerous missed calls, Ignored text messages, dead social medias have kept them up wondering what is wrong with me am I still alive (?) Well I don’t blame them tho. At this point just call me Queen-of-Isolating-Herself-When-Something-Is-Wrong. I mean that’s what I’m best at right?

My dear friends, let’s just put it this way. I’ve always despise people who project their insecurities on other people. But I’m not gonna lie that I’m currently not at my best version and has been struggling with my own insecurities that it’s starting to eat me from within. My self confidence is on the ground my self-esteem is almost nonexistent. If there’s one thing I (used to) like about myself is my confidence but now it seems like I’m the most vanilla. I mean life can throw wtv the shit it wants at me idc for as long as I have my confidence, nothing will stop me from moving forward. Im unstoppable. I’m not scared of living, I’m not scared of dying I’m not scared of being alone I just need my confidence to get through everyday but when I’ve lost something that’s way too priceless just because of how I hate the way I look now? I feel nothing but DEFEATED. Worse? by my own thoughts. WORSE? I let it happen.

Anyways coming back to my point of me despising people who project their insecurities on other people, I’m currently taking a break from social medias and disassociating myself from everyone so I don’t end up becoming like one of those people I despise but rather taking my time to figure out my life and build my confidence back again. I know it’s not gonna be easy, it’s gonna take a lot of dedication, hardwork, consistency but I promise for as long as I live, I’ll take care of myself. Baby steps. One day at a time remember? I’ll come back stronger. I promise.

That being said, I’d like to thank myself for taking the courage to show up again. Thank you Fey, thank you for not letting your friends down this time. I know it’s not easy for us, to even wake up and get dressed and go out again. But you did it. We did it. In fact you showed up twice this month alone. First when you said yes to Sarah and watched Barbie together. ‘Twas a good day right? I remember how content I felt after saying goodbye to Sarah. The meaningful conversation over lunch? The laughter? The jokes you made? Not to mention you got to visit mini petting zoo and saw a lot of exotic animals and CUTE KETZ. It feels like you’re living again. It wasn’t that bad after all throwing yourself out there right?

And second when you said yes to Becca and watched Theather together. I know one of the reason is you’d feel bad if you didn’t go cause she bought the ticket for you. But hey look at how important people think you are Fey, that they’d willing to pay more just to have you there. How can you disappoint her this time? I mean you skipped Erika’s bday bash with some stupid excuse (am sorry girl promise I’ll make up to you) and now you gonna let Becca down? Nah mate thank god I knocked some sense into us and made ourselves go. In fact the show was brilliant. I’ve never been to that kind of Theather. Thought it’s gonna be some typical theater where you are seated in horizontal seats and just watch the play as you yawn but who am i kidding, it’s totally different than what I expected and most importantly I had fun??? Funny how there was no dialogue at all from the actors but it was very interactive show. Brilliant. Kudos to Dinesh and the rest of the team. Oh and did I mention how Dinesh seemed to be in his element when he acted for the show? Hahah no wonder Becca is furious at how determined he is with the show.

Anyways, look at you baby. I’m so proud of you Fey I really do. I saw how confident you were when talking to people that night. I saw how you were able to make eye contacts again when talking. Two stranger even came up to you to say hi and one them remembers you from Ethics Programme! Wow. Nothing but proud. I hope we will keep on striving to be our best, Fey. Please don’t ever give up. There’s still so much to look forward to in life. So many people, places, food to explore. I promise.

P/s: how bout we make it 3rd time of socializing this month and go out with Syaza to watch Oppenheimer and eat the goddamn steak? Maybe I’ll reward you with something? ;)

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smokeybrandreviews · 1 year

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Long Long Time

With the ending of The Last of Us this past weekend, I was left with thoughts. The ride was one of the best I’ve been on but, for some reason, i was left wanting. The game is one of the best I have ever played but, more than that, something felt off. I enjoyed my time in this incredibly rich take on that bleak ass world but, before I actually commented on it, I took some time to actually think on my overall experience. These are the primary realizations I had after letting that entire series sit with me for a few days after that explosive conclusion.

Bella Ramsey was good as her Ellie but she's not THE Ellie. Game Ellie hits completely different. There is this softness to her that Show Ellie lacks. While I will always prefer Ashley Johnson in the role, Bella really did make the character her own.

Pedro's Pascal is daddy. There were certain choices made with Adaption Joel that I don't necessarily agree with but, overall, I think they did The character justice. Obviously, I prefer the game version because I am a Gamer before anything but Pascal really delivered.

As an adaption, The Last of Us was exceptional. They capture the feel and tone of the source material perfectly, while simultaneously adjusting an hours long game narrative for television consumption. They had to basically distill thirty or so hours of game play down into something a non-Gamer would find captivating and they, for sure, did that.

Episode three, goddamn! This was the high point of the show and it wasn't even about Joel and Ellie. I'm sure you know about why this episode stands above the rest so there's no need to go into detail but, suffice it to say, Nick f*ckin' Offerman!

Some of the other changes were blergh. Ellie baby exposure was kind of meh. Like, that's how vaccines work. You just found a way to vaccinate people against the shrooms. Do that to other pregernants. You're willing to murder a teenager, what's a few mothers-to-be? That changes kind of makes everything these characters go through, inconsequential, bordering meaningless.

Hive mind subplot just disappeared. Sh*t was cool for an episode but then just never revisited. Why? Do you know how much more terrifying that world is now??

Gorgeous and expensive and you see every penny onscreen.

Should have had more infected. Seriously, for all the loot onscreen, there was a criminal lack of actual infected action. I know that stuff doesn't translate from game to screen well but goddamn, man. Three set pieces the whole show?? Three?

But them flashbacks, tho. Goddamn! Seriously, that cold open for episode one was chilling and the little expose for episode two? That, on it's own, could be a solid Emmy admission for Best Short. It was that good.

Speaking of original content,, I hear they might expand upon this little world they created for season two instead of jumping straight into the narrative of the sequel game. I'm not a fan of the Part II story so expanding might be dope. Like, there should have been a game in between those two showing the deterioration of Ellie and Joel's relationship and I kind of hope the show actually gives that lost content to us.

That said, most of the original content was the worst part of this show. Not the flashback stuff, that was inspired, but the additions and tweaks. Don't misunderstand me, as far as television is concerned, it's top tier. I just worry for when the writers go off-script so to speak.

I don't want the quality of this show to fall off a cliff like with Game of Thrones and, if that bit with Kathleen is anything to go off of, I might be right in my apprehension.

Sh*t was too short. We didn't get to spend time enough with Ellie and Joel. More to the point, Joel and Ellie didn't get to spend that much time together. Watching that beautifully shot and cut rampage Joel goes on during the season finale rang a bit hollow because, not two episodes earlier, Joel was still acting like a dick. Now, he's massacring an entire hospital to "save" Ellie? Really?

The game is still much, much, better. Go play that. Seriously, if you’ve never played the game, but enjoy the show, go play that sh*t right now.

#The Last of Us

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smokeybrand · 1 year

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Long Long Time

Hive mind subplot just disappeared. Sh*t was cool for an episode but then just never revisited. Why? Do you know how much more terrifying that world is now??

Gorgeous and expensive and you see every penny onscreen.

I don't want the quality of this show to fall off a cliff like with Game of Thrones and, if that bit with Kathleen is anything to go off of, I might be right in my apprehension.

The game is still much, much, better. Go play that. Seriously, if you’ve never played the game, but enjoy the show, go play that sh*t right now.

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racingtoaredlight · 1 year

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Playing “Naked”

youtube

I feel there’s this misconception by laymen that jazz musicians are just playing complete nonsense that has no point, structure or coherence. And in a lot of cases that’s true.

Think of jazz as finance.

Both are hugely reaching terms that cover a lot of ground, and are kind of hard to define in a singular “this is it” term. They also share a lot of high-level intellectual stuff that can be off-putting, and purveyors of these industries (lol at calling jazz an industry) have little problem tossing around concepts that seem very complex and difficult to grasp. Which makes them playgrounds for bullshit artists and conmen.

Conmen like John Scofield, for example.

When you take away all the surrounding noise, all the help from bandmates or clever arrangements. When you take away tools and leave a musician with just their hands and mind...that’s playing naked. Watch the video at the top.

Then watch this...

youtube

It doesn’t blow my mind to see shcucksters playing solo gigs with two amps (mic’d and including a gigantic wedge monitor for some reason...) and two pedal boards, one reserved for looping yourself. It doesn’t blow my mind because these guys are everywhere...go to some rib burn off or some county fair and I guarantee you see some dude with an acoustic, a mic, and a quarter mile of pedals at his feet.

There ain’t shit “naked” about this. Well, there kinda is...because his aimless melodies are more exposed than they typically are.

And I’ll admit, there’s some decent stuff going on here at first...almost like he’s restrained...oh wait, nope. Go to the 3:00 mark and watch him vomit all over himself. Listen for at least 30 seconds.

When you play “naked,” it can be intimidating because all those things that help fill up space...bass, drums, piano and horns...are gone. Some guys fill this up with parlor tricks like slapping your guitar and making all this percussive bullshit...which is lame as fuck.

But, again to the video at the top...there are no parlor tricks here. No loopers or giant pedal boards. Sure, there’s a drummer, but his job here is to follow and mimic exactly what Metheny does. There’s no support here for Metheny...he’s just got his hands and mind.

And what he does with it is incredible. Compare what he’s doing melodically to what Scofield is attempting to do with great difficulty...those melodies are clear and defined, they’re coherent and each one blends into the other cohesively. You can tell where he is in the harmony...even though there isn’t harmony there. You can tell because his melody is so clearly defining it, which is what a musician is supposed to do, instead of just puke all over the floor and charge people to watch.

Seriously, that Scofield video pisses me off. Why not just call it “I’m too cheap to hire a band, but I have a bloated lifestyle to maintain?”

The master of playing “naked” is my idol, Joe Pass. You listen to him...yea, he’s fucking with the harmony and stretching sections out...but you know exactly where he is in the song, you can hear the melody in your head, and...if you catch yourself tapping your foot...you’ll likely match up with him during one of the many cuts where they cut from his Tommy Bahama shirt to show him tapping his old man walking shoes. The man had groove.

youtube

The whole point is this...

If you’re going to be naked in public, you might as well invite the audience along with you. Otherwise you’re just some weirdo making dumb sounds until the cops show up.

I’ve found a nice niche playing solo guitar in this vein and have probably done 15-20 gigs like this now since last October. It was nerve-wracking at first, let me tell you. Just standing there like some jamoke...and that’s before you play a note.

But once you get used to it, it’s a fucking blast. People seem to like this shit more, and get more into it, than when I was playing rock gigs blasting ear drums out for drunk people. Again tho...that’s only if you’re inviting them along to join in enjoying the music.

Because good god, I’d never get hired again if I showed up and did shit like Scofield in that video above. The only thing keeping the crowd there is the fact that they paid, and if they walked out, they know they’d be wasting their money. Because everything he’s playing is metaphorically no different than him standing on a stage with his dick hanging out while giving two blazing middle fingers to the audience.

It’s not hard...ok let me amend this...it’s incredibly hard to learn how to play melody that clearly outlines the harmony while still sounding interesting, and it’s even harder to add in chords and basslines at the same time. THAT SAID...if you wanna play “naked,” and play “naked” well, this is what you gotta do.

Otherwise the audience will be even more lost than they were with bass, drums and piano. And also, if you don’t, people will start to think all jazz musicians are conmen like Scofield.

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xtinyaurora · 3 years

Note

Heyyyyy I’m new here :3 could I request ATEEZ reaction to you being a brat? :3

Ateez reaction: Bratty Y/N

__________________________________________

➼ requested?: yes

➼ genre: smut

➼ pairing: Ateez x neutral!reader

➼ Word-count: 2k+

➼ Warnings: nsfw content, strong language, cursing, threads, annoyance, bratty behavior, pet names...

➼ Note: This is not based on their real behavior or meant to represent real life. This is simply a fan fiction and is only for the purposes of fun, it’s a hobby. Read at your own risk!

➼ A/N note: Sorry for updating after a longer time, I had a few mental health issues... Thanks to everyone who waited tho and thank you so much for 200+ followers... Please let me know if you have ideas in mind for a ‘special'! Hope you all like this one tho. Feel free to leave some feedback! Also, let me know if any of you wants to be added to my taglist!

➼ Taglist: @teeztheflag @darkstarlights

__________________________________________

Park Seonghwa

You were sulking because Seonghwa didn’t bought you that dress you saw in one of those expensive shops today. Actually, you could call him your „sugar daddy”. He bought you anything you wanted whenever you wanted, but not today. Today was different, because you already started to provoke him in the early morning, disobeying and yelling at him. He didn’t know what happened to you, even after asking a hundredth of times, you just kept on being bratty towards the male. Soon, he had enough. While the two of you were sitting in the car, at the parking lot of the shopping mall, you kept on complaining about that dress. Seonghwa leaned into your side and grabbed your throat, immediately shutting you up. „You better stop talking, before I lose my shit and hit you right in the face and fuck you right on top of this car, baby. Would you like that? For all people to see how I put you in your place. Huh?” You silently shook your head, a hint of fear written on your face. „I thought so. Now stop being a bratty little bitch and start behaving, understood?” Again, you remained silent, nodding your head this time. Seonghwa then sat back and started the power of the car, driving off, back home.

Kim Hongjoong

Hongjoong finally took a day off, immediately calling you to go on a date but you were mad at him. Why? He knew that you had other plans today but still choose this day to take a break. „Y/N, baby, come on. You know I have no say in this. This is not my fault, so please come to the restaurant we always go to, okay?” You let out a ironic laugh. „Tz. First, you pick the worst day and now you want me to come there myself? Oh no, if you really want to get out with me then you are going to pick me the fuck up.” Hongjoong was kinda shocked, not excepting this kind of behavior. After massaging his temples, since this boy was stressed and annoyed by your way of behaving, he just hung up the call, not in the mood to keep up with you right now. You went absolutely insane. Like, how dare he? When midnight came around, Hongjoong entered the front door, food in his hands. You were sitting in the living room, still pissed about earlier today. A knock on the doorframe made you look up. When spotting your boyfriend, you rolled your eyes and kept watching tv. „Haven’t cool down yet?” You got back to 180. „Excuse me?! Get your ass out of this room Mr. 'I think I can allow myself whatever I want' because yes, I am still mad at you.” He stared at you, not believing what was happing. Since when did you get so bratty? Shaking his head while approaching you and placing the food on the table, he grabbed both of your forearms and looked you deep in the eyes. „Okay now listen here you bratty bitch. You’re gonna listen to me and start behaving or I will punish you so hard that you wish you could turn the time back and thank me for making time for you, okay? I want my good little kitten back because I don’t like nasty strays that don’t obey me. No one would like one, so be happy and appreciate me you ungrateful pice of shit and shut the fuck up.”

Jeong Yunho

He was just staring at you blankly, while you were throwing a tantrum. This already happened a couple of times but it was never this bad. He kept on watching you, until you eventually calmed down yourself. It really provoked you that he didn’t stop you or has done anything for that matter. At some point, you gave up because you knew how well Yunho could control his anger. Honestly, you didn’t even know why you freaked out like that. Both of you were searching for a movie to watch and when Yunho picked one that you already saw and absolutely hated, both of you started auguring. It’s his turn to pick the movie because you picked last time, yet that didn’t sit with you. Maybe you were just having a bad day? At least that’s what Yunho told himself. „Are you done now?” You sat there, at the ground while Yunho sat in front of you, on the couch. „Yea... sorry.” Yunho nodded, pulling you up on his lap. You thought he will cuddle with you but sike, he flipped you over so you were laying on your stomach, over his knees, ass in perfect view for him. „How many hits do you think you deserve? Hm? Maybe 20 or 30? Or... 40 or 50?”

Kang Yeosang

He had this furious and annoyed look on his face. You got kinda terrified now, knowing what a beast this boy could be when he was mad. He watched you until you went silent, sitting next to each other and waiting for what’s going to happen next. You started to get nervous because Yeosang kept looking at you without saying or doing anything. His silence never meant anything good... „Stop looking.” He raised one of his eyebrows. „Stop talking.” You did keep quiet, not knowing what else to do now. „Dumb pet, do you think you’re worth my time? Oh how embarrassing... It’s such a shame that there are so many people who want me yet I chose you over everyone else, an ungrateful little bitch.” His words kinda hurt and you stated to doubt your worth. Maybe he’s right? You maybe should have followed the rules. You shouldn’t have told him no and most important, you shouldn’t have done all of that in front of his friends. You kinda started to regret it but it was way too late now. Even if you did apologize now, Yeosang wouldn’t forgive you, he will punish you no matter what. The more silence there is, the harder the punishment will be. „Go into the bedroom. Take your clothes off and wait for me.”

Choi San

To be direct, you were unnecessarily overreacting. When you visited the boys and watch them while they practiced, San didn’t greet you as usual and you didn’t like that. At all. He was too focused to even notice you tbh. When he finally turned around and spotted you, he rolled his eyes, taking in your grumpy state. He made his way towards you, so he could give you a kiss but you pushed him away. He gave you a questioning look but you just turned your face away. „Hey, give me a kiss.” You still didn’t move, hoping to upset somehow. „Y/N.” His first warning. „Look at me.” Still, you didn’t move. The other members started to notice but kept on practicing because they didn’t wanted to get involved in anything. San exhaled loudly, pulling you up and dragging you out with him. „Don’t touch me!” You yelled at your boyfriend. He didn’t even bother to listen to you. „It hurts!” You hoped that he would loosen his grip a bit, but instead his grip on you got stronger. When he reached his room, he threw you on the bed and undressed himself. „You hurt me!” Still having that attitude on, you again yelled at him. He gave you a murderous look, finally shutting you up. He the hovered over you, staring you dead in the eyes. „If you ever dare to pull something like that in front of the other members again, I will make you regret visiting us, okay? Now better behave, before I completely lose the last bit of my self control, you stupid kid.”

Song Mingi

„Mingi, Mingi! Wake up!” You shook him until he groaned out in annoyance. „Y/N? What’s wrong?” You huffed. „I am bored. You have to do something with me, come on.” You tried to pull him up but he was stronger than you, resulting that you were the one being pulled and laying on top of him now. „Did you loose your mind? It’s three in the morning, let me sleep!” He half yelled, half whispered. As he was about to drift off to sleep again, you pulled on his hair, making him tear his eyes open and cry out loudly. „Ouch! What the heck, Y/N? That hurts!” A smile creeped on your face, finally achieving your goal of waking him up. He just stared at you, giving you a ‘are you serious?’ type of look. „Now that you’re awake, we can do something! Should we watch a movie or should we play some ga-“ „No! We are not going to do any of these! It’s bed time, so lay down! I am not in the mood for all of this.” You smacked his thigh. „No Mingi, get up! What do you not get from 'I am bored, let’s do something’, huh?” He really has enough. „Okay Bunny, you wanna do something? Let’s play a game. It’s called ‘try not to scream while getting your ass beaten and brain fucked out’. Sounds fun, right?” You gulped, then getting pulled and flipped around, so that your backside faced up. At least he’s full of energy now...

Jung Wooyoung

Both of you were sitting in a restaurant. He was already fed up with your behavior but he let go because he didn’t had enough strength to deal with you right now. This cutie was so hungry and tiered after practice, that he didn’t wanted things to go wrong but you really left him no choice. Just because you didn’t wanted to eat in this restaurant and wanted to go to your favorite one instead, you stated to act up, gaining lots of attention from all the nagging and yelling. Wooyoung grabbed your upper arm and pulled you near him, whispering in your ear so others wouldn’t hear. „Shut your mouth now Y/N, I’ve had enough of your bullshit. You’re so fucking embarrassing you stupid brat.” He then let go, harshly shoving your arm away and leaning back. When the waiter approached you two, to note your order, you remained silent. After rolling his eyes, Wooyoung ordered food only for himself. When he finished eating, he stood up and threw some money in the table. He was about to walk away when he turned around to face you. „If you don’t get up within the next two seconds, I will break your legs.” He gave you a last condescending look before walking out. You obeyed and followed him out, joining him in his car. He didn’t even spare you a glance, driving straight to your apartment a grin forming on his face, several ideas for your punishment popping into his head.

Choi Jongho

Hit after hit, you put in more effort to annoy him. You soon realized that this wasn’t enough, so you started pinching and biting him. „Ouch, Y/N, are you crazy?!” Ah, finally! You smirked at him and wiggled your eyebrows, satisfied that he finally showed a reaction. „Do you think that’s funny?” You smiled. „Very. And now that I finally have your attention, you can do something with me. Oh and, get me some water please I am thirsty.” He stared at you in disbelief. „Are you okay, Y/N?” You gave him a look of disapproval. „Uhm, yea? I still am but if you don’t get me my water I won’t be and than I am going to hit you, again.” He was kinda amused now. „Oh? Where does all that attitude come from, all of a sudden?” You shrugged with your shoulders. „I don’t know and I don’t care. You gotta deal with it now.” You laid down on the couch both of you were sitting on and placed your legs on his lap. „I am still waiting for my water Jong.” He didn’t move. You wanted to raise your head up to scold him but he was faster than you, now hovering over you. „I will give you something else to drink. Get down and kneel. We have to clean that bratty mouth of yours, yea? Come on brat, suck me off. You don’t want me to get mad now, do you?”

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