Zuko is peaceful when he sleeps.
Katara doesn’t get many opportunities to see him like this so she takes her chance now, tracing the line of his jaw, the pall of his eyelashes against his cheekbones, the way the skin turns from ivory to rusted crimson just beyond the bridge of his nose. The early morning light softens the harsh edges of his scar, the furrow of his eyebrows; he is more a child now than he has ever been, ensconced in her arms.
She can stay here a little while longer, Katara decides, can let herself have this before the duties of a lifetime of war draw her away once more. Besides, she can’t bear to wake Zuko when he looks like this, content and undisturbed as he rarely is in life. He must be more tired than she thought, to sleep so far past the sunrise that calls to the fire in his blood.
The first rays of dawn wreathe his hair like Agni himself has come to crown him, the golden prince who reclaimed his kingdom, and he looks so very young suddenly that her entire being aches with the need to protect, to love, to pour in through his skin all that he’s ever lost so no hurt can ever touch him again.
He’ll wake any moment now, she knows. Blink at her with those sleep-dazed golden eyes and give her that lopsided half-smile that’s tender and disbelieving all at once, like he still can’t quite believe any of this is real.
(She hates herself for that, hates the girl of misplaced rage and caustic grief who pushed him away, hates that he always flinched like he expected a mortal blow. She’ll spend a lifetime in penance.)
But that’s okay, she thinks. Everything is okay now, because she has a lifetime to change that, to love him, to live. They have time, so much time that she doesn’t quite know what to do with all of it, but they’ll figure it out together.
Katara curls closer to Zuko, looping her arms around his neck and waist, and closes her eyes.
He’s still warm, the way he was when she first hugged him with the sunset at her back and the waves beneath her feet. Still warm, still burning, still here.
Her brilliant, beautiful firebender.
A hand settles on her shoulder.
“Katara?”
The word comes to her across a great distance, as though Sokka is still back in the South Pole instead of right beside her. Or maybe she’s the one who’s far away, gone somewhere he cannot follow.
She blinks, and watches the final, fading trail of the comet recede into the blue, blue horizon. Blue for new beginnings, blue for peace, blue for the crack of Azula’s lightning.
“Katara,” Sokka says again, and now there’s something terrible in his voice, something she’s heard only once, almost seven years ago. “Please.”
At Zuko’s side, his uncle weeps. He’s bent to press his forehead to Zuko’s hand, murmuring words of guilt and love and sorrow.
There’s no need, she wants to say. Can’t you see? He’s right here.
She brushes the hair off Zuko’s face and gently kisses his scarred cheek.
“Katara.” There is no joking Sugar Queen, no teasing in Toph’s trembling voice. “You have to let him go.”
Katara shakes her head mutely, and curls her body around his.They’re partners, her and Zuko – them against the Southern Raiders, against Azula, against the world.
She’ll always have his back.
(Later, they’ll tell the stories of how the last Southern waterbender held the crown prince’s body through the night. Later, they’ll whisper about how she had to be dragged kicking and screaming from his side, how every bit of water in the courtyard rose to cover the fallen prince with a shield of ice, how they had to knock her unconscious to keep her from flooding the palace.)
Later, Sokka will not meet her eyes when she wakes.
Katara goes where he tells her to, in the days that come after. Follows him to a garden of white silk and ash, to the shaky beginnings of a new world, to a ship that carries her across the element that failed her.
She stands on deck and watches the long-hated land of her childhood fade into the distance until it is nothing more than a faint speck on the endless expanse of the sea. She thinks of a smoke-singed courtyard, the beat of a ruined heart; thinks of a beautiful boy lit in lightning and the sobbing girl he died to save and the story that died with him, forever unfinished, forever frozen.
“It’’ll be okay,” Sokka tells her gently, when a faintly familiar land of ice and snow forms in the distance. “Let’s go home.”
(She doesn’t, though. Not really. Not ever.
She never goes home again.)
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I’m right where you left me
Aaron should have expected this. He should’ve known that this is going to happen. Every single good thing that he has never last. He will never be good enough. Katelyn broke up with him because “being with Aaron is too much.” And Aaron understands, his psychotic brother and derange boyfriend, his trauma and the stupid fucking foxes. Of course it will all be too much. He doesn’t blame Katelyn.
So why is he completely shattered when Kevin left him for Andrew and Neil?
Kevin and he are nothing, just two guys fucking because they have nothing better to do. So it is Aaron’s fault for falling. And how can he not? When Kevin is the one to take care of him and make sure he is okay after they fucked every time. When they go out and have dinners and watch movies and take late night walks at the beach. When Kevin helps Aaron to study for his finals, making him food and reminding him to drink water.
Aaron has no one. The broken deal he had with Andrew left him with no friends. He had Katelyn, but now, he only has the fucking foxes. So of course it will be Kevin.
Aaron is not delusional, they explicitly say that they are only friends with benefits. Kevin tells Aaron many times how much he looks like Andrew. Kevin whispers to Aaron that he likes Andrew but Andrew is with Neil and Kevin cannot decide if he likes Andrew or Neil more. Aaron knows all of these. Kevin can never hide it well when he is staring at Andrew and Neil.
Aaron notices Andrew noticing. Aaron just did not expect Andrew to talk to him about it.
“What is going on between you and Kevin?” Andrew asks Aaron one day, when they are somehow alone in Andrew’s room.
“Nothing,”
“Don’t lie to me.” Aaron does not answer. But andrew will not budge and there is no one more stubborn than Andrew maybe except Neil.
“We are just friends with benefits.” Aaron snaps.
“Kevin likes Neil and I.” Andrew casually says, taking a cigarette and lighting it.
“I know,”
“Neil and I don’t mind,” Aaron’s entire world collapses right there and then.
“Okay, I don’t care.” Whatever pieces of Aaron’s heart that are left have burnt up to ashes.
Andrew looks at him, but Aaron has been in therapy with Andrew long enough that Aaron knows how to hide something from him.
Without another word, Andrew left Aaron, taking the ashes with him.
Aaron stands there stupidly. He feels like crying. He does not want to cry. He cannot cry. His chest is burning and his eyes are watering and he cannot breathe and he needs to get out of Andrew’s room before anyone comes back and go back to his room and lock it and-
The door opens, Kevin comes in and one look at Aaron’s blank face he envelops him in his arms.
“What’s wrong?”
Aaron cannot talk, his throat is so tight that if he speaks then all that will come out of it are screams.
Aaron wants to pull away, before the remaining pieces of his soul are ruined. But he is selfish and desperate and a masochist. So he allows himself to stay in Kevin’s embrace. He hugs him back tightly.
“What’s wrong?” Kevin asks again, sounding very concerned.
“Just terrified of my finals,” Aaron mumbles into Kevin’s hoodie.
“You will ace it,” Kevin says, “I’ll help you.”
No you won’t. You will be with Andrew and Neil.
“Okay,” Aaron says.
Then Kevin kisses him. And one thing leads to another and they end up in Kevin’s bed.
Aaron wakes up to an empty bed. He should get used to it. But he already misses waking up in Kevin’s arms. Aaron cannot help but lingers in Kevin’s bed before getting out.
Aaron tries to go on as usual. He goes to classes, he goes to practices, he studies. He tries to ignore Kevin. Kevin is confused at first, seems even a bit hurt. But then he spends all his time with Andrew and Neil. And Aaron knows that Andrew and Neil told him.
So there is nothing left for Aaron. Once again Aaron is being left.
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