#or do actually thoughts /r/ forming in my head rn | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

yuzurins · 1 year

Text

# circles

in which: sae’s tired of running around in circles with an undefined relationship, so he decides to take his chance when he can to make you his.

warnings: kind of unorganized, mentions of alcohol, intoxicated reader, insecure reader, mutual pining, just a bunch of comfort and fluff, honestly strayed from the original prompt t-t

reblogs and interactions are appreciated!

itoshi sae is a busy man.

being the most sought for japanese football player and as well as a regular on the real matrid team meant he was always doing something football related. practices, games, events, you name it.

his schedule is packed with plans set months before they happen. companies and teams always request to see him sooner, but he makes no exceptions for anyone, not even his own family.

well, that goes for anyone but you.

itoshi sae has found himself breaking his own ideals without any hesitation. he‘s standing in front of your apartment, 5 hours, 27 minutes and 54 seconds before his flight back to spain, after an obviously drunk text you sent him 10 minutes ago.

1:22AM

y/n: saweewea

y/n: did u knwo a broken heart hurts REAL bad😍

sae: what

y/n: i think i’m goign to crush my cat with my body weight

y/n: u fg hhh hj jgjjgjhhhrkdoforjfof

sae: where are you rn

y/n: ogm r ru gonna come visit me 😎😜🥺

y/n: i’m soooerirjf lonely

sae: .

sae: be there in 5

sae doesn’t know whether to ring the doorbell or call you to let you know he’s here. heck, he’s not even sure whether you’re at home or not, but he does know that it’s not often you go out to drink. as he’s hesitating, you hastily open the door, almost like you could sense him there.

“sae!” you slur, just barely avoiding stumbling over yourself as you straighten up. “i didn’t expect you to actually come visit me.”

“neither did i.” he scoffs as he takes in your current state: graphic anime tee (which he gave you last christmas), sweatpants, messy tangled bun and your face is entirely red. you reek of soju and he knows better than anyone you’re a lightweight, so sae mentally prepares once more for what he’s about to get himself into.

the response from the magenta haired in front of you causes a pout to form on your face. he’s not quite sure if it’s just his imagination or not, but it looks like you’re more down, more tired than usual.

“are you okay?” he asks, and this prompts you to stretch your arms out, almost habitually, and wrap them around the taller male’s torso.

sae flinches ever so slightly at your touch. he gently pushes you back into the apartment as he closes the door, all while having one arm wrapped around your waist.

it’s obvious you’re not in the right mind space, but as everyone says, drunk words are sober thoughts, though sae doesn’t know whether that’s good or bad. you getting blackout drunk as a result of academic stress has become a monthly occurrence now, and it always ends up with sae coming over to babysit you. he’s more than aware of the fact that you’re taking his presence for granted, yet despite that, he’s still always there for you.

you’re obviously more than just friends, so why does sae feel like the line separating friendship and relationship just keeps getting thicker?

you latch onto him like a koala as he shuffles over to your couch. he doesn’t force anything out of you, doesn’t show any impatience, and just waits for you to talk.

the two of you quietly bask in the comfort of each other’s arms for a long time. just as sae begins to loosen his hold on you believing you’ve drifted off, you cling onto him even tighter, refusing to let go of his warmth.

“don’t go.” you mumble into his hoodie, voice quivering, and sae wonders if it really is school stress that’s made you this way.

humming in response, he pats your back lightly as if he’s caring for a baby, trailing his hand up to your head to play with your hair.

sae doesn’t want to pry, but there’s something he really needs to confirm before it eats his thoughts up even more.

“i won’t leave,” he reassures. “did anything happen?”

a sound comes out of your mouth in response, barely louder than a whisper. sae turns his head to look at you and you take it as a request for you to repeat your words. you try again, and this time, you’re still mumbling, but it’s enough for him to make out what you want to convey.

“i’m sorry.” and a tear falls from your eyes, “i’m sorry, sae.”

now sae’s been in this position for countless times, always coming to be your personal therapist at unearthly hours in the night, but this is the first time he’s ever seen you act so vulnerable. he can feel your body trembling against him and his heart aches just seeing you so dejected.

but he’s not dense enough to not realize what you’re apologizing for, because it’s the same reason as to why he decided to ask in the first place. he gently removes his arms off your waist, turns you to face him and moves his hand up to wipe the tears streaming down your cheek.

this tender, silent exchange between the two of you is more than any amount of words that express. sae’s usually indifferent eyes are laced with affection, and you just can’t help but feel so guilty because of that.

“i know you’re really busy,” you avert your eyes, biting on your bottom lip to stop yourself from breaking again. “you’re always doing so much for me, and i feel so terrible because i don’t deserve any of it.”

sae doesn’t say anything, letting you finish your thoughts before stating his.

“i was watching one of your games earlier, and i was reminded of the fact that your world and mine are so far apart.” you’re still looking away, but a soft nudge from sae’s hand pushes you back to look at him. “i just—i feel like i’m not enough for you, sae.”

through watered eyes, you can catch the expression of the male in front of you waver, and with years of knowing him, you’ve mastered the ability to be able to tell what emotions are going off in his mind.

“i know it sounds silly—“

“it’s not silly.” he interrupts, despite being patient all this time, but struggles to find the right words to continue. “is this what you’ve been feeling since back then?”

you shake your head, and lean forward to rest it on his shoulder. “the internet is scary.”

sae lets out a soft chuckle at your unintentional joke, and moves his head to rest it on the side of yours. “but what only matters is that i’m here in front of you right now, yeah?”

“it’s true that i’m busy, but i’ll always be your anchor of support whenever you need it, seriously.” his fingers find their way to intertwine with yours, and your heart flutters at how romantic he’s being. “so don’t cry sweetheart, because you’re breaking my heart as well.”

the use of the pet name makes you giggle, it being so out of character for sae, yet that’s how you know he really means it, from the bottom of his heart. hearing the sound of your laughter allows sae to relax his shoulder from all the tension he unknowingly had been feeling, and he cups your cheek with his palm, bringing you face-to-face with the taller male.

his eyes study your features, taking in your beauty, before going back to make eye contact with you. though you notice how they flicker down to your lips and hover there for a split second longer than anything else, your heart thumping loudly at the realization of what he’s asking of you.

you flash him a small smile in response as approval, and sae wastes no time closing the distance between you two. his touch is soft, almost like he’s afraid of breaking you, and easily washes away all the worries clouding your mind.

sae droops his arms over your shoulders and rests his forehead against yours. “you were always and will be more than enough for me, y/n.”

his sweet words bring a red flush to your face (not from alcohol this time) and you purse your lips in embarrassment as sae’s grin only gets bigger.

“so just hurry up and be mine already.”

BONUS: the morning after

you wake up with a pounding headache, and immediately try to get up to get a drink of water, but your body doesn’t budge at all.

as your eyes begin to adjust, you look down to find sae and his arms locked around you, causing a scoff to come out of your mouth.

of course you couldn’t move when a whole professional football player (incredibly fit btw😍) has a death grip on you.

“sae, wake up.” you nudge him and he only whines in response. “didn’t you have a flight to catch this morning?”

“mm, shush.” he takes one of his arms and lightly pushes you back down into his embrace. “who cares about that, been waiting for this for far too long.”

you laugh and decide to give in, slowly drifting back to sleep.

meanwhile, sae’s nonstop vibrating phone on your nightstand is totally unnoticed, the cause being hundreds of messages and calls from his manager wondering where he is.

1K notes · View notes

bones-of-a-rabbit · 8 months

Text

u can never have too many au ideas (aka the cursed-sun/moon au)

(im copy n pasting this from discord bc im lazy sorry y'all fsjhf)

other au idea: Sun is a ruler or lord in a fantasy world or smthn and Moon is the form he's been Cursed into turning into each night. Reader is a low-tier magic-weilder (who has a secret past that involves smthn rlly Bad and they used to have a reasonable amount of respectability in th community but now theyre shunned and cant get a job anywhere and also has a big scar and/or only one eye lol) who's one remaining ability is the ability to lift minor curses or plagues. Sun has been searching for someone who can 'bless' the curse of Moon (or whatever is making Moon be nasty murderous bloodthirsty man) for ages but mages r rare and most of them spend maybe one night trying to cure Moon before either getting got or being scared into getting tf outta there

so eventually word reaches Sun of a mage who's been looking for work, with the only catch being that they arent very powerful and no one has much to say abt them, and Sun, who has burnt every single thread he has trying to find a mage, is like GOOD ENOUGH CALL THEM HERE

and reader is like 'oh shit this is potentially a rlly good job, the only catch is that i have to deal w a demon possessed guy thats like twice my height and three times as strong,,' and like. bc they have Zero Options and also feel like their life has run itself into th ground and there is little left for them/no way to get themselves out of their Issues, they r like 'yeah sure its gonna take a while bc i can only perform minor magic but i'll do whatever i can to see that this curse is delt with'

and instead of trying to face Moon head on, they start with just kinda,, getting to know him. he's kept chained/locked away in a chamber every night to keep ppl safe, but every night reader goes into the chambers, sits at a tea table just out of his reach, and just. talks with him

they dont entertain his trying to mess w them, taunting, cruelty, etc, but they talk when there's the chance for standard conversation. at first it's hell bc Moon is a little shit and he never cooperates. he never answers questions, he spends the entire night threatening to tear them apart and savor their insides, etc. they bring him a cup of tea every night, and every time he smashes the cup and throws the pieces at them

ok well point is eventually Moon starts to mellow out around them, will actually sit and have conversation with them, one day is like 'you think i dont know what youre doing?? youre just trying to bore me into falling for ur trap so u can kill me. i like ur style but its not gonna work >:3'

and reader is like 'i literally do not have enough magic to kill a toad let alone a whole entire possessed person' and moon is like ',, huh. so what IS ur goal here??' and reader is like 'i want to lift ur curse for both u and Sun's sakes. i gave u my word, and i will follow through, at the very least to clear my own conscience of a past sin'

and so eventually Moon, out of curiosity, and later bc he likes spending time with reader, starts letting them cast the healing magic on him, breaking the curse little by little every night

and at the same time all this is happening, reader is spending mornings and evenings with Sun and keeping him up to date on how the process is going and, eventually, becoming the person he turns to when he's stressed or tired or rlly just wants company

and idk smthn smthn eventually both of them rlly want Reader and they dont know how to act so they just b making fools of themselves but reader is a dumbass so theyre just confused

(Moon absolutely tells Reader abt every 'oh man i rlly wanna kiss kiss snuggle smooch the mage rn' thought Sun has during the day but Reader is so used to Moon being a little shit n making shit up to mess with them that they r just like ._. )

the plot twist part,,

(the secret dark past that reader is hiding is that they used to be a local mage for a nearby town who was known and respected for giving 'blessings' to ppl for small fees but one day for Reasons, they cast a curse upon someone and one of the biggest no-no's a mage can do is Curse someone so the town practically rioted, tore them down from their pedestal, called upon another mage to strip reader of their magic, and then cast them out)

(rn im considering the idea that the person reader Cursed is Vanny, who, because of her own curse, eventually went on to be the one who cursed Sun and Moon)

123 notes · View notes

pinkpicket · 2 years

Text

What is blocking your success?

Mfs be ready for typos bc I haven't reviewed this 🤡

Choose an image starting with pile 1 to 6 from left to right.

Pile 1

Wow okay so remember how the society and capitalism constantly screams in our fuvking face telling us the reason why we're not successful? How u don't work hard enough? How u should actually be waking up at 3am to hustle bc that's how billionaires do it? Well that's fucking bullshit so get that shit out of ur mind. U genuinely think bill gates and ms kylie jenner hustled day and night to get $7.25 an hour? No baby they did not. So leave that mindset, it's stupid and it's literally damaging u. My advice would be to actually relax and spoil urself instead of shitting on urself for needing 9 hours of sleep. Baby i will be honest with u, as long as u treat urself harshly the universe will treat u the same. So give urself some love and relax, u deserve it.

Pile 2

Ya u need to stop thinking about relationships and dating and actually start planning and shit bc guess what? Shit needs planning it dont just happen out of thin air. So sit ur ass down and write down a plan and change the plan 74747 if that's what it takes for it to work out.

Pile 3

Communication. Baby u really lack the ability to properly communicate and persuade others. Trust me i get where u r coming from, people are fucking annoying but in this society we have to basically learn to stfu at times and not be honest bc truly that's what everyone does. So keep ur thoughts to urself and form relationships on a superficial level ( be detached ) just so u can progress in ur life and career. Remember people's ego are fragile so dont fuvk up ur life with being unnecessarily harsh and honest with ur words, be diplomatic and suger coat that shit till it turns so sweet they get hooked.

Pile 4

Whatever direction ur heading toward rn holds no success. So u wanna be the hermit and find urself? That's great but in this fucked up capitalistic society that wont bring u success. I genuinely hate to say this but spirituality is not possible with success ( materially and career wise at least) for you ( this is just for u bc others actually require to be spiritual to be successful). Also it's time for u associate and talk to people more, being an introvert is a big disadvantage for you, so go out, make friends and soon u will find success. Group work will bring you success.

Pile 5

Enough of planning, it's time to work. Dont just sit around and expect great shit to happen only bc u manifested it ( remember saturn rules everything material in this world, so if u want a successful career with good money, u gotta go by saturn's rules which are being disciplined and hard work) dont relay on shit that people from tiktok snd tumblr tell u to do "all u have to do is manifest by this technique" and not do shit?? Baby that's not how real life works. U work and u get what u deserve ( at least for u this is like this, hell manifestation might work for others but for u i see this as a different case)

Pile 6

Baby ur tired and i know, i truly see u worked hard and nothing happened. It's like all that hard work was wasted but relax now bc something big is coming. Baby u r getting what u deserve, idk when but it will come. Honestly im genuinely soo happy bc u truly deserve this. So what's blocking ur success? Nothing. Whatever it is, it will come at the right time.

Okay bye uglies. Hope u liked this NOW FOLLOW ME BC IM LITERALLY SO HELPFUL AND PRETTY 🥰💕

#free tarot #pac reading #tarot reading #free card reading #pick a card reading #pick a picture #pick a card #tarotonline #free tarot readings #tarot #tarot of the day #pick a pile

326 notes · View notes

figitorynonsense · 11 months

Text

i present:

figitorynonsense goes on a ramble about a random rescue bots AU she thought of in the car on the way to chinese school

sososo… idk if anyone has done this yet but Predacons and Maximals [from TFBW] in Rescue Bots….. and then eventually all teams get like a speciality weapon due to some glitch in time monster that awakens and caused this and so happens to lead the rescue bots towards the animalistic forms direction [more, MORE!!!] and the maximals + predacons to the vehicular forms direction

this sounds stupid and all but its mostly self indulgement

anyways here comes the big part

AKA what animals would the rescue bots take on???????

[ill explain the maxims and predas later]

Chase-

ok wow but

theres alotttttaaaaaaa options here im think

at first i thought a cat bcuz… aloof and CAT but thats not really fit for fighting a gargantuan rip in space-time continuum being

and then those big ass cats [lions… lynxes… leopards…]

yea maybe but they just didnt fit

so i resorted to fish bcuz they’re the silliest, goofiest and most non-caring things i know

but i dont think anything i thought of sufficed so why not just…

POISON DART FROG.

hes a poison dart frog, a bleu one and also bigger bcuz wtf why not

frogs r pretty chill and usually harmless

but poisom dart frogs honestly kinda scary ngl

so hes got poison lightning now!!!! yay!!!!!

picture upcoming…

Heatwave-

this cant be that hard right…

At first im thinking

“wow maybez tiger or the silly crocks…”

maybe i should have stuck with that but idk a great white shark kinda appealed to me…

or maybe a king cobra

idk im thinking off the top of my big ass head rn

yea

actually maybe a grizzli bear

nah nevermind im sticking with the tiger

bengal tiger

ok i shoullldddd have maybe perhaps sticked with siberian tiger but c’mon… hes a rescue bot…

but then again they’re against a wormhole in time so idfk anymore

Blades-

idk uh

i could go for a mockingbird or an owl but they aint exactly the biggest hunter

and then i just remembered “SkyHawk” so LMAOOOOO

Ferruginous Hawk

yay

theyre apparently pretty social so hurray

[feel free to correct me on these…..]

[damn how do yall write long ass shit?? keep on going on the wrong areas SMH

Boulder-

ok maybe my first thought shouldnt have been a tortoise but

makes senze…

however i think boulder is the only one eligible for the hipp o

im not calling him fat

im not calling him slow

it just fits him

ok maybe i should reconsider —

ill leave this up for discussion:

Galapagos Tortoise,

Hippopotamuses,

Or Manatee [dont ask where this came from]

shit i just ran out of orange juice

ok im done here for now byeeeeeeee

12 notes · View notes

sopebubbles · 1 year

Note

Just a slight input of mine, as in my two cents.

I totally absolutely understand yoongi's and tae's pov about them feeling left out when hobi goes in heat and Jin gets all possessive, but towards the end we also see how yoongi also gets a little possessive about Y/N when hobi mentions having a room for Y/N ( as in yoongi wanting y/n for himself) so in that perspective shouldn't yoongi be a little more understanding of Jin? No? Just me?? ( This is what I feel) Jin could have had his own dreams and desires no?? While trying to do his best (from his perspective) for everyone in the pack...

and somewhere my heart goes out to Jin that maybe he wants to have a child with HIS HUSBAND with whom he's been married for so long and loves so much. And Jin isn't being selfish just that hobi is his husband first and then the omega of the pack??? Jin could have been trying his best under the pressure and with what all knowledge he has?? No??

My heart goes out to jin for trying to take care of everything and everyone without being able to express himself. Maybe I am wrong but this is just something I felt. And I do agree that buying an entire house without consulting with other members is wrong, anyone would be upset.

( also being a leader isn't easy, if the members do not say how is he going to understand, and even if everyone says something and share their input but in the end their points do not get selected that too leaves a sour taste(I hope you understand what I mean) and the leader, I don't know if they do, go about talking with everyone individually? That could be exhausting no?😔)

And I am so proud of Y/N for asking for help. good job MC. I love you for this, you fighter!!

Im glad you noticed that parallel with Yoongi's possessiveness! There will definitely come a time when Yoongi has to confront those possessive feelings when she's actually around AND others want to be around her. I think there's a bit of a difference in the fact that they're in a years long relationship and Jin is trying dictate how other people can be with Hoseok. Yoongi should try to understand Jin's feelings, no doubt, but it doesn't make Jin's actions to alienate everyone acceptable. It will be interesting to compare them as alphas down the line

And yeah, Hobi is his husband but if he wanted to be exclusive like that maybe he shouldnt have brought 3 other alphas into his pack. The most troubling thing about his behavior for them is that its a change. In his own heart Jin never did use to care about whose baby hobi would have, he would've just loved any baby of Hobi's as his own. But his mom put this idea in his head and the fact that he wouldn't talk about it just shows that deep down he knows its wrong.

I think all your thoughts make sense in a way bc those are very natural ways to feel, i just dont think those are the core issues, but im glad you're in Jin's corner! Pack alpha is a tough job and theres still an important issue that Yoongi raised which is that Jin sees pack alpha as a set of privileges (i get to decide where we live) instead of responsibilities (i must provide us with a safe place to live). I strongly believe that if Jin hadn't been first he wouldn't be pack alpha. Its strictly bc of his position as Hobi's husband that he has the role BUT his upbringing/family also makes him feel entitled to it (his mother would be extremely displeased with him if he wasn't pack alpha). The stress is honestly a bit too much for him and makes him close in on himself, not discussing with others and ultimately making bad decisions. At the end of the day, he should be at least discussing important decisions with his packmates even if he ultimately thinks that his choice is the right one. In my opinion thats the more effective form of leadership.

I know everyone wants her to rush back but im honestly very happy with yn for doing the best she can rn. Asking for help was huge even though she might not have asked for all the help we think she needs.

Thanks for reading and sharing your thoughts.

#lone wolf thoughts #lone wolf asks #thanks anon!

7 notes · View notes

throwaway-yandere · 2 years

Note

(Nutjob anon!)

HELLO ANSY! HOW ARE YOU DOING? SORRY FOR THE RADIO SILENCE... IS JUST THAT I'm not the biggest Ayato fan so I don't have that much to contribute with lol

I just dropped to say hi, and, even though I just say I don't have that much to say(? But Imagine that faceless Ayato can shapeshift in order to isolate you, making you break bonds, new and old, because said person suddenly have been behaving weird and saying even more strange stuff to you, like how your confused face is so cute, how at times you scrunch your nose while you slumber... you feel so lonely now, but at least a cute cat have taken a liking to you, keeping you company...

...You feel bad for saying this, but, at times, with certain angles and for a short moment, it seems like your feline friend faces disappear, leaving a black void staring back at you with two eyes incredibly similar to the Kamisato head.

(Sorry if this have been discussed before, I must confess I haven't been keeping up with the faceless Ayato Lore IAFJIFGIV)

Well! I'm off to make lunch and bake a cake! Have a good day Ansy! And to all anons!

Oh, and 🐠 anon? As a tropical land inhabitant, I wish I could send you some of the sun that we have right now hehe! It's the kind that burns your skin even if you are fully clothed. Have some cake as compensation tho.

Nyehe, hello nutjob anon, izz alright, we're all busy!!!! And oh my god Ayato's a cat again–

Careful, he bites!reader: again? Mind explaining what do you mean by that, dear? I'm afraid I don't understand...

Okay but fr I'll be taking note of this... Shape shifting faceless!ayato would be phcking OP– dw faceless!ayato lore in the actual creepypasta is wild and I'm still wondering if I should remove details like Hu Tao being Itto's friend and all that lmao. Also as a fellow tropical inhabitant, wanna take our sun away? Please... Please it fricking b u r n s–

"Sound asleep, I see..." A gloved hand brushes against your cheek, but it did not stir your slumber. He traces his thumb around the bridge of your nose before slowly cupping your face. Ayato leans in closer, his lilac eyes softly gazing at your vulnerable form, but his thoughts were not malicious.

"You haven't had sleep this nice in a while now, haven't you?" He whispered. "My dearest ██████."

For a moment, in the silence of the Kamisato Estate, the lord curled up to lay beside you like a cat would with their master. Alone with your presence and his thoughts, Kamisato Ayato pondered if the day will ever come...

That he'll finally reincarnate and have you in his arms again.

Side note: GUYS I PROMISE I WON'T MATCH-UP FACELESS AYATO WITH ANYONE IN THE IDOL AU. YOU'RE SAFE FROM HIM I SWEAR–

I'm INCREDIBLY picky when it comes to ayato's match!!!! Him and Dainsleif– although I already found the latter's perfect producer (and his story has a working draft rn). Ayato is such a fricking menace so this is me each time I look at his candidates:

Cuz I know... I know I'd probably end up making his plot weird af and I don't think I can protect his match lmao.

I made it my agenda to:

Don't let Ayato kill anyone this time: especially anemo users

Idol!Ayato will not be a cat. Or an eldritch or Lovecraftian abomination.

I WON'T BRING UP GINSENG TEA AGAIN–

NO FACELESS AYATO.

I swear. I swear I'll make Ayato soft this time!!! I swear he won't be too bad in the idol!au!!! I PROMISE I WON'T MAKE HIM IRREDEEMABLE AGAIN–

#this is not a promise that I'll protect you ayato's producer #this is a challenge for myself cuz i know itll be hard to write ayato as a soft yandere lmao #nutjob anon #ansytea-talks #tag: ghost in the kamisato estate

14 notes · View notes

missavira · 2 years

Text

I’m laughing to myself at everyone I follow blogging about Dark Road while I, a fellow and avid KH fan, have been in a Genshin Impact brainrot recently and haven’t even watched the DR cutscenes yet lol, I feel like such a fake XD

I’m just so obsessed with Genshin rn...

Speaking of which: new icon! Tighnari is my new favorite boy and I love him so much!!! ^.^ It’s interesting though, I feel like my love for him is different in a way I don’t remember feeling before. I feel like I usually pick my favorite characters. Of course there is still a subconscious attraction to them, but I mean that I will see a character and be like “you are going to be my favorite.” Meanwhile with Tighnari, it feels like he chose me instead. I didn’t have that immediate definite ultimatum. And yet, he has quickly become my favorite comfort character 😊 You know that meme of the hamster singing baby u r my ANGELLLLLL? Yeah that’s me with Tighnari ❤️

More rambles under the cut because nobody asked for this monologue lol

When I first saw his character reveal I did think he was kind of cool but I also wasn’t entirely sold on his design, and I knew he was a botanist/forest watcher but didn’t have any other insight into his character. Then I learned that he uses a bow and I am not very good at bow users lol. So yeah, I didn’t see him and immediately know I would love him or if I even wanted to pull for him. And yet there was a Tighnari tiny voice in my head that kept making me think about him and yeah the more I thought the more I realized I liked him and now here we are!

Now I think he is adorable and love his design (the only changes I would make would be to make his skin a bit darker and have his ears come out more at an angle like the fennec fox). It brings me a lot of pride and joy to have one of the only two dendro characters in the game rn (minus traveler) (I also have Collei but that’s not the point here). I actually love that he uses a bow because before I got him I didn’t really have a main for a bow. I have been using Amber only because she was my highest level archer, but now (even though I have him on the field already) when I need to use the bow I’m like “Tighnari you’re up! :)” and he's actually really fun to play! I like that his skill taunts opponents so I have time to aim lol and then there are extra arrows that auto aim which is so nice omg. he has a really quick cooldown and energy recharge too so I can almost just spam his specials *sigh* he is amazing! I also really love the dendro reactions, they are so fun and powerful!

In terms of personality, I love his balance between being sweet/caring and snarky. I just love that he is genuine and honest in whichever form that takes haha. Also I thought he was going to be more focused on just botany research, which he still does, but he actually seems more driven by ecosystems and conservation, which is something that is very important to me and being in the animal/conversation field, I can relate to him in that way. But also his feelings toward academia - that it is an important contribution to science but one he personally wishes not to dedicate himself to and even gets a little frustrated when it feels like that’s everyone’s only priority and wishes others could understand his ambition of instead doing active hands-on work in the field - is SO extremely me and I respect him for that. And he’s also a leader which is admirable. But the thing is that he’s not a leader because he has to be (like a military captain or something) or because he wants to be. Instead he is a leader because just by being himself and doing what he would naturally do, he inspires others and they look to him for guidance. A true role model. And despite not asking for or working towards that leadership, he has the knowledge and capabilities to be worthy of the role, steps into the role graciously and confidently, and does his best to do his best at the responsibilities associated with it, which to me is what is truly admirable. As someone who struggles with self confidence, nerves, doubting my abilities and feeling underqualified (esp when put in a leadership or presentation role), Tighnari is truly inspiring to me and I wish I can be confident and qualified like him someday.

I decided to pull for him before Sumeru was released so I saved my primos for him, which was a good thing because he took 80 pulls -.- but there was never a doubt in my mind that he wouldn’t come home. I mean, he asked me to come home. It just took a little while for him to be ready haha, but once he was home I immediately grinded for materials to level up/ascend and put him in my teapot and set him up with decent the best artifacts I have and just made sure he was comfortable and loved and appreciated 😊 and everything just feels right in the world that he is home.

I have so many favorite characters and I’d say quite a few of them are comfort characters to an extent. For female characters they are often those who I wish I could be or who I hope I am. For male characters they are often those, and I'm embarrassed to admit it even though I know I’m not the only one (I mean that’s the whole point of otome games isn’t it), but who I am drawn to romantically and have looks/personality characteristics I admire irl. And they help me feel valued, loved, and appreciated in the void that is my irl love life lol. But Tighnari is different. Not that he doesn't have those qualities, I just mean... Despite relating to him in a few ways, he isn’t a character I 100% self-identify with, and I don’t swoon for him yet probably. I just love who he is. He is so precious and makes me very happy and I want to protect him at all costs. Out of all my faves, he feels the most comforting of the comfort characters. He is THE comfort character. He is my new best friend. He is everything ❤️

#avi's thoughts #personal #did not mean to get that deep into my thoughts but there you go lol #the tighnari confession nobody asked for 😅#just wanted to write my thoughts down for myself mostly #the fact that I even wrote all this is proof of everything I said because...#I don't think I've ever written something like this or this long for any other character #tighnari my beloved #I love you #baby u r my angel #Update: Honestly the VA drama was really upsetting and hard for me and accepting/get used to a new voice was a challenge #But zach has done an amazing job and I'm glad he has been brought back to life with a new voice #And now its like 'we worked through it together and are even stronger/closer because of it' 😊#so yes I still very much love my boy 💚

2 notes · View notes

xgryffinwhore · 3 years

Text

september nights

request: i was wondering if you could write another soft bill smut? i don’t really have a specific plot in mind, we’re just really lacking content on tumblr rn :( in some really precarious place where they don’t want to get caught

warnings: soft smut, like i mean very soft.

word count: 2118

before your lips met bill denbrough’s, love was always, to say the least, a conundrum. lets be real for second, boys wasted your time, and you let them. only the cute ones of course. you are a hopeless romantic, drunk off of molly ringwald and john travolta films. you wanted any relationship you had to be just like the movies.

through your heart breaks, your best friends stood by you, your losers. eddie, richie, bev, stan, ben, and bill. for each tear you shed a punch was thrown to the man who caused it, they were protective over you. bill the most though, he always got so defensive when you were in the mix. all throughout middle & high school, bill has had to deal with every guy who even dares to think about breaking your heart.

“its not fair bill” you wailed into your pillow. he stroked your back and hushed you, his eyes welling with tears. “im never fucking good enough for any guy and its so fucking sad!” your complaints being cut off mid sentence by a choked out cry. “y-y/n. all of y-your boyfriend are i-idiots. anyone w-who would d-d-do this to you isnt w-worth your t-time. anyone w-would be the luckiest in the w-world to have y-you in their life” you picked your head up and looked at him with swollen lips and blood shot eyes “there no one out there for me bill, no one.”

he bit his lip, fighting back any tears dripping from his eyes “they j-just dont see how p-pretty you are. how g-gentle and caring and s-s-sweet, and h-how your face c-can light up any room. theyre f-fucking idiots, and you d-deserve m-more.” you clearly thought he was being nice, because you could take a MOTHER FUCKING GOD DAMN hint, so you replied “i wish there was someone out there like you, for me, that thinks of me the way you do.”

he furrowed his brows, tossing his head back and running his fingers furiously through his hair. “d-dammit y/n!” he cursed “cant you s-see what ive b-been trying to say? w-w-what ive been t-trying to say f-for the last f-five years!?!” your expression was bewildered, your brain was going a mile a minute trying to figure out what he meant. his frustration got the best of him, he got up and stormed out the door, feeling embarrassed and stupid for trying to make you understand how he felt.

he was half way out your front door, fuming for his keys lodged deep into his front pocket; when suddenly:

“bill!”

his head turned at the call of his name, “y-y/n please i d-”

smack.

your lips locked with his, he rain pouring heavily outside. bills lips stilled at the contact, but this lasted briefly, he deepened this kiss by pulling you in to his abdomen by your mid back. your bunched the front of his base ball t shirt with your fists, and he did the same but with your hair.

the rest is basically history.

now six months later, and you couldnt have been happier. bill knew how to treat you, nights out twice a week (you always wanted to pay but bill insisted,) holding your hand to and from classes, he let you borrow have his varsity baseball jacket, which smelt just like him and was a little too big for you.

when he would drop you off and your classes, he would always grab your hand and transfer a tiny piece of paper into your palm. when you got into class to unfold it, it was always a cute little message about his love for you.

bill had it bad for you, everyone knew that, and you loved every minute of it. he met every and any standard you had, and exceeded your expectations.

it was september, still warm enough in derry to wear shorts, so you and your friends thought of a last hurrah for the ending of the summery weather.

“camp out, its nearly perfect” Richie exclaimed. eddie rolled his eyes “like youve ever been near anything perfect toizer, do you even know what perfect means?” richie shoved eddie “yeah eddie i actually have. have you seen amanda’s tits?”

you tuned out richie and eddies bickering as you’re boyfriend cleared his throat. “you g-gonna go?” he said into your ear, “only if you promise to wear bug spray bill, you know how bad-” he cut you off with a kiss, his mouth forming a small smile at how cute you were. “get a room, honestly” stan poked, pda wasn’t his favorite... “at least i h-have something to k-kiss aye s-stannie”

you arrived at the edge of the forest, parking your car at the last parking ish space. you walked toward the sounds of ben and richie fighting, and came to see that richie really went all out. three tents, sticks for a fire, and more snacks than anyone needed.

you all spent the remanence of the daylight dancing in the light sky, sharing stories, and eating waaaay too many chips. it was dark now, you all huddled in a circle near the fire; making small talk and trying not to admit you were all very tired.

“ok folks, im off to bed” richie yawned “me stan eddie n’ mike will take the green tent, bev and ben in the red.” richie paused and smirked over at you and bill, you were tangled in his limbs, golfed in his navy blue pull over. “and uh- heh- billy boy and y/n in the yellow tent eh?” you could practically feel bills eye roll, god richie was so immature.

“w-we dont have to s-sleep in the s-s-same tent, i c-can ask ben if he’d s-switch” you look up at bill and reassure him “bill no- its not a big deal, right?” he tucks your hair behind your ear and kisses the side of your temple “c-course not.”

you both went into the tent, bill began to unroll the blankets you both had packed tightly into your bags. You both set up your makeshift bed, bill leaned against a pile of pillows while you hugged his side, your face buried in his neck. his smell was absolutely intoxicating; his skin had remanence of his milk and honey body wash, but it was slightly overpowered by wintergreen, clove, and his bourbon cologne.

you were like this for around an hour, the orange crank-powered lantern being the only source of light. you switch positions though, you now laid your head on his lap, reading a magazine you stole from the hair salon. he watched your eyes scan every letter, when you read something funny you’d huff to yourself, and when something was intresting you stuck your tongue out from between your teeth. he adored you.

“d-dont stay up t-too late” he stroked your hair off your shoulder “we have t-to have you w-well r-r-rested.” you sat up from beside him, as he adjusted the pillows and took off his pull over, then his pants. he got under the covers and waited for you.

“nice donut boxers” you laughed. “s-shut up” he blushed and regreted not changing them when he had the chance. you turned around took off your shirt, you were shy about how you looked, but it was just bill. it was just bill. you heard his breath hitch, his eagerness radiating off his body onto yours. the air became tense as you unzipped your pants and threw them to the corner. you turned around, bills pupils growing until you were completely facing him.

“yeah i know. mine are boring” you laugh nervously, brushing your hair behind your ear and getting under the covers next to him. he didnt respond, he couldnt take his eyes off of you.you began to sit up again “i can go put back on-” “n-no!” he interrupts, his blush taking up his entire face.

“i j-j-just cant b-believe i g-get to see something s-so special” he gulped “s-so b-b-b-beautiful.”

you grabbed him by his shoulders and kissed him, hard. youve been with boys before, i mean youve dated plenty of people. but no one ever called your body special. hot, yeah. nice, yeah. beautiful, sure. but no one ever thought that it was special.

bill was a kind boy, the most you two have ever done is get each other off with your hands, always clothed. bill never asked to see more, he felt lucky enough just to make you feel good, and that was enough for him. so when you felt the heat of his hands hovering over your body but not touching it, you new you’d have to call the shots tonight.

“bill,” you laid down “just touch me everywhere, please.” he crawled in between your legs, kneeling so that he could lean over your face “m-my pleasure.”

he traced your collar, leaving small, delicate, kisses to make up for what his fingers left behind as they trailed. he kissed the valley between your breasts, licking slow striped down your skin. he picked up your upper back a little and cocked his head to the side, you nodded and he unclipped your bra. he sat their with his mouth open, taking in the view. you blushed and muttered “hey, keep that mouth to good use.” he dipped down and sucked on your nipples, his mouth felt so good against your skin grazed with goosebumps. he was gingerly with his tongue, it was sexy, it was romantic. he kissed down your stomach, his fingers sweeping down your sides. you could see his member pressing against his boxers, the pressure made him wince every once in a while. his fingers met your panties and he hooked them. again, he looked up for permission, you nodded once again.

he brought your underwear down your legs and off, looking back to see what he had relieved. he licked his lips, getting ready to please you more than he already did. but you felt bad, bill always gave gave and gave. “its ok, im ready right now.” bill looked up at you in shock, he wasnt expecting you’d want to go all the way. “y/n, y-youre sure?” you lean up and kiss his lips, swiping your tongue against his bottom lip “please.”

he pulled down his boxers eagerly, his member sprung out to hit his stomach. he lined up with you, checking once more that it was ok. then he pushed in, bottoming out. he felt bigger than you thought, of course he was well endowed, but he filled you up so well. you mewled, the pain and pleasure making a delicious feeling that made your toes curl.

he waited, but began slowly moving after a bit. he grunted, feeling you wrapped around him was something he’d never be able to get out of his head he thought to himself. he grunted “f-fuck this feels g-good’ he grunted, his breath becoming heavy and full of lust. with every stroke, you felt yourself get more and more lost in the bliss he made you feel. “youre making me feel so good bill” you moan, the sound of his name coming out of your mouth driving him absolutely crazy. he speeds up, loving the view of your face contorting in pleasure and your body moving with his.

he couldnt help but feel admiration to you, your hair formed a halo around your head, and the sweat that coated your skin made you glisten in the orange light. “im t-the luckiest in the world” he husks, holding your cheek.

you felt the knot in your core coming undone, “bill im close” you strain, trying not to be too loud so you dont wake your friends. he moved your leg up to his shoulder, hitting you from a different, deeper angle. his fingers went to your clit, making you bite your had to stop you from screaming. “you l-look so p-pretty y/n, t-taking me s-so well. making y-you feel so good.” “so good bill” you repeat, drunken off his cock and fingers.

without warning, you came came, your legs spazzing as you moaned “fuck bill” he followed, his hips stuttering, as he cried out into your shoulder. he pulled out and laid next to you, both of you breathing heavily and coming off your highs.

“y/n” he looked at you “t-that was really j-just wow- thank y-you.” you kissed him, chaste and sweet “that was great yeah?” “it w-was perfect babe. t-thank you f-for t-that. i love you y-y/n.”

“i love you too bill.”

he sat up, his fingers dancing on your inner thigh.

“y/n?”

“yeah?”

“c-can we p-please do t-that again?”

#bill denbrough #bill denbrough x reader #bill denbrough smut #bill denbrough x you #bill denbrough fanfic #IT movie #it fanfiction #it bill #jaeden martell #jaeden lieberher #jaeden wesley #jaeden x reader #jaeden martell x reader #jaeden martell smut #richie tozier #eddiekaspbrak #stanley uris

2K notes · View notes

cursestothemoon · 3 years

Note

Could you do some more headcanons that feed Fred’s and my innocence kink?

Fred + innocence kink is on my mind 24/7

yes. innocence kinks all around ✋🏻

17+ IF YOU ARE TAGGED AND DON’T WANT TO BE TAGGED IN SMUT PLEASE LET ME KNOW

warnings:NSFW, innocence kink, possessiveness, praise!kink, virginity being lost, oral (male and female receiving but male goes into more detail), mentions of face fucking

aLRIGHTY THEN

i love this so much

so let’s say you’re a virgin when you first start dating fred

and you wanted to have sex, but no one had really done it for you like that and quite honestly most of the guys you had been with made you a bit uncomfortable

prior to fred

fred was just

walking sex appeal

you couldn’t help clench your thighs

shift in your seat

bite your lip

when he would do the simplest things

concentrate on something

write his essays

sHOW YOU NEW BRACELETS

that was a big one, he has nice forearms and wrists

or when he’d tell you something serious

bUT HIS SERIOUS FACE IS SO SEXY

AND YOU KINDA JUST NOD OBEDIENTLY

BECAUSE HE COULD TELL YOU TO DO ANYTHING WITH THAT LOOK AND YOU’D DO IT

fred also notices how you react to his serious, ‘take charge’ voice

he uses it more often

just to see you squirm

alright so it’s late one night

you guys are in your dorm

you’re a prefect

it just makes sense, adds to the image

go with it

so you guys are in your dorm

having some fun

heavy make out session

mother mother is playing in the background, you can pick which song

your on your back, fred is on his side with half his torso resting on you

his hand is running up your bare thigh (you’re still in your school uniform) and his tongue is becoming well aquanted with your own

that’s when his hand trails up under your skirt and starts playing with your underwear band resting on your hip

and you want to

you really want to

you’re ready but you’re also nervous because you are a virgin and super inexperienced

so you kind break away and try to get him to make eye contact with you and pay attention

but fred’s a little lost in the moment, trying to dive into your neck to start kissing the skin there

you grab his face and say you have something to tell him which gets him to pay attention, he can tell it’s serious

you just come out with it

you’re nervous and can’t really look him in the eye

but you say it

“i’m a virgin, freddie”

“oh, love, if i was making you uncomfortable earlier...”

“no no no, i just...i want to, i really want to, but i don’t know what i’m doing i don’t want to disappoint you.”

and fred’s going through many emotions rn

because you’re blushing and batting your eyelashes at him so innocently

and your hips and just barely grazing against his own and he doubts you know what you’re doing

and you look so shy and actually worried that he might be disappointed in you

as if 🙄

so he tells you exactly that

that he could never be disappointed in you, in any way shape or form

then it’s what you utter next that has him holding in a moan

“maybe you could teach me!”

and you’d sit up on your knees really fast

because this is exciting for you too

and you think its actually kinda hot

fred is biting his lip with a smirk at how excited and obedient you look

“whenever you’re ready I’d be happy to be Professor Weasley.”

“i’m ready now, Fred, just wanted you to know”

fred asks if you’re sure about... a billion times

before pulling your face back down to his to continue kissing

and i think this night you’d lose your virginity and that was his main focus

just making sure you were comfortable and ready and having fun

baby steps

ok now lets talk about Professor Weasley teaching you different things

ok so fred’s a dom

i think he’d be a mean, teasing, sarcastic, borderline sadistic dom

and you are eager to please, innocent, obedient, painfully submissive

its great for everyone honestly

so you come up to him one day and tell him you want to give him a blowjob

and you want him to teach you how

fred is hard ✨instantly✨

ok he’d sit on the edge of the bed and move to unzip his trousers

and you’re sitting on your knees patiently waiting

looking up at him with doe eyes as if you aren't about to let him be the first person ever to fuck your mouth

that’s a big thing that turns him on

how he’s the first person to make you feel like this

to corrupt you like this

it bleeds into his possessiveness kink (there has to be abetter name for this but i can’t think of it atm)

because he knows that because he’s the first

hes the teacher

if there happens to be other guys after him in a way you still belong to him because of this

not that he’d ever want there to be other guys

he loves you

and wants to be with you forever.

but the thought really gets him going

that no matter what

sex will always bring you back to him and you guys fucking

anyway

back to you waiting to learn how to suck him off

i feel like fred has a really comforting aura

so you are more excited than nervous

and don’t have an issue with being open about your curiosity

testing things out

what happens if you swipe your thumb across his tip

or if you kiss it

and fred is trying so hard not to just grab you by the back of the head and start fucking your pretty little mouth because god this was way too attractive

the way you still looked so innocent as you sucked on the tip of his cock

your eyes wide and looking up at him waiting for praise but the only thing he was able to grunt out with a strained voice was

“just like that”

“good girl”

he’d have a guiding hand on your face

his thumb lovingly running across your cheek one

wiping tears once you started to take him deeper and insisted that you were fine even though he could feel you gagging on him

and he’d get close to cumming embarrassingly fast but it’s fine

you didn't know any better

but he’d tell you ask you to swallow

“m’ gonna cum, yeah? think my good girl could swallow?”

you’d nod and hum around him

and that would push him over the edge

he’d cum in your mouth and you’d swallow just like he asked

it didn’t taste bad by any means

different at first

but as you kept sucking you’d actually start to really enjoy it

it was salty, just a bit tangy, but it was knowing that it was Fred’s cum that had you wanting more

you’d keeping sucking, making sure to get every last drop

and fred was hypersensitive at this point

with shaky breaths and grunts turning into high pitched breathy moans and whimpers

he’d have to pull you off of him

“tastes good”

he’d nearly lose it again

he’d also pull you in for a heated kiss because jesus christ he cant believe he's this lucky

had to have been a saint in his past life

the first time he eats you out is also a whole experience

fred would live in between your legs if he could

he loves your little whine and whimpers as he goes down on you

he dreams of them

oK FRED ALSO LIKES TO MAKE YOU BLUSH BY SAYING THE FILTHIEST THINGS AT ANY POINT IN TIME

HE WILL WHISPER THINGS IN YOUR EAR THAT HAVE YOU SQUIRMING AND BEGGING TO GO BACK TO YOUR ROOM

oR he’ll tease you and say

“my poppet’s pussy is so responsive to my touch...”

because it’s T R U E

anyway

innocence kink is where its at you didn't hear it from me

tags:

@siriusement

@amourtentiaa

@vsawyer1989

@lifeofkaze

@theorangedrummer

@erinblack003

@famdomhideout

@an2402lths

@escapingrealitybyreading

@readyg0erge

@maybesandohnos

@therealhouseelvesofhogwarts

#Fred Weasley #Fred Weasley imagine #fred weasley headcanons #fred weasley x reader #fred weasley smut

275 notes · View notes

arcadejohn127-9 · 3 years

Note

Just

Just think about Luke seeing Mc as an older sibling figure, and then think about how he'd have to see em die from old age or an illness

H u r t

You know what? I'm going to hurt your feelings right back

You did this, this is your fault. I'm crying so now you gotta cry with me!

I'm making it hurt EXTRA

I'm not done with this angst wagon! I have so much angst stored up in me rn and you're all going to have to deal with it 😂 let us cry together

Warning: death, angst, sad Luke

"(Y/N)! Im back! Your guardian angel has arrived!"

You smiled, turning from the window as you heard the gentle footsteps come further into your little home.

"oh..? I thought the celestial realm called you back."

"I was able to get time off my duties to come see you, I do have a duty to protect you after all."

Luke smiled brightly at you, a bag in hand as he walked into your room. His face faltered for a moment seeing you were out of bed but kept his smile, placing the bag down on the table.

"awww, you're still such a sweet young boy."

You reached out to him, your wrinkled hands shaking slightly. He huffed at your cooing but none the less, bowed down so you could pinch his cheeks. You smiled wider; happy there was still some baby fat on him.

"I'm not a boy! I'm a grown man."

He was pouting childishly; some habits never dying. But sadly, he was right. By now he has finally grown up. He wasn't exactly an adult but he was close. He was no longer the small boy you use to know in the Devildom, he was now a tall gentle man. He reminded you alot of Simeon but definitely didn't go after his sense of fashion.

He was grown. And you've grown....grown to become old and Sickly. He still had such a youthful face despite being thousands years older. It was truly unfair but you would rather he looked as young as he did than look like you. Saggy and wrinkled. Death on your lips, it made them dry. It tasted bland and sour.

"what did you bring me this time? I hope it's a new recipe."

"I actually visited the Devildom before coming here, I made your favourite with Barbatos."

He unpacked the bag, revealing the sweet treat. It was going to be far too sweet for your taste buds now but you couldn't refuse. He frowned slightly, placing his hands on your shoulders.

"you should be in bed, the doctors said you need to rest."

"I'm not doing anything, those doctors shouldn't think of me to be so fragile! I spent years in hell." You grumbled, grinding your drenchers.

You missed the demons; it's been awhile since they've visited. It was unusual....for years outside or in hell you were surrounded by them. Always pestering you and wanting your attention. Endless plans that always ended with Lucifer fixing it. You missed them.....so so much..... you just wished your magic didn't grow so weak.

"yeah.... you're unbeatable so being in bed won't be anything."

He had you there. But it was growing tiresome of just sitting in bed. You were wasting away in it; the doctors weren't sure what was going to take you out first. Old age or illness. All Anyone could hope for that it's peaceful and in your sleep.

Luke helped you back in bed, smiling as he tucked you in. He placed the desserts holder on your lap before whisking himself away to the kitchen. He made you both some tea and picked up cutlery on the way back. You thanked him when he handed you the cup, humming happily at the warmth. The world felt so cold now.

"Have the brothers visited lately? Barbatos seemed.... solemn - did something happen?"

"No, it's been mostly you or Simeon seeing me but I don't blame them, it must be hard to see me - I know Simeon tried to stop you aswell, Saying it'll be too hard on your heart."

"nothing is going to stop me not even Simeon! you're family, and those demons-! They should be seeing you!"

He didn't even realize he stomped his foot, pouting and puffing out his cheeks. No matter how much he wanted to be called a man, he was still young. You hoped you'll get to see him fully mature into a powerful angel he was destined to be. You knew he'd be a great help to the celestial realm and make people just as happy as he's made you.

You always saw yourself as just an older sibling and he seemed to feel the same but now you felt more like a parent. Watching your child grow up and be better than you ever were. He made you so proud.

"ah~ theres the young boy I know, always pouting and complaining about demons, it was so nice to see you freely enjoy yourself the third term, you looked so much happier."

"he can see all sorts, perhaps something bad is going to happen soon but it could always be, he saw a rat in the castle - oh the way he could loose all composure-!"

"if it wasn't due to a recent visit then- why was barbatos so glum? Do you think he's okay?"

You both bursted out laughing, imagining the usually stoic butler frantically smacking the floor with a broom whilst ontop of a counter. Your laughed grew louder and louder until you choked on it; coughing harshly into your shaky palm as your chest tightened.

Luke quickly helped you sit up properly, rubbing your back as your coughing slowly died out. He told you to keep it easy but noticed how quickly your mood soured. He patted your lap and held up the forks; forcing a small smile on his face.

"let's eat, shall we?"

you both dug in, he kept his bites small as it was for you after all. You didn't even realize you teared up; the flavour was the exact same if not better than you remember. Barbatos always knew how to make it perfect for you; even now as your sugar fondness has simmered it still tasted just as good.

He really was amazing....

Luke wiped your stray tears as you stared at the treat, a distant look in your eyes. The angel was starting to panic; no matter his efforts you were becoming unhappy. Was it him? Was it talking about the Devildom? But he knew if he tried to never talk about it you'd just insist on knowing. He didn't want to keep making you upset.

"I'm sorry, just - I've been so nostalgic lately, I really appreciate what you've done, don't be upset with yourself, Luke, just ignore this old human."

"I can talk about the celestial realm, would that make you feel better? Or-or- new Cake ideas-!"

"I'd like that very much, has the celestial realm change much?"

"it's been really busy, I'm actually getting my own apprentice soon! She's been a late bloomer with her wings but she's been amazing with prophecies - I've ranked up actually! I'm almost to my goal....soon- I'm going to be just like Michael and I can help humans across the globe!"

He was beaming, his hands becoming more animated as he talked. You hummed softly to yourself, nodding as your eyes drifted to the wall. His voice soothing you.

"And- and the demon angel partnership has been a huge success! Theres been more pairs ups this year than any other! Things are really improving in the other realms- you know it's all thanks to you, right? You did this."

He waited for your response, but you didn't say anything. You just stared at the wall behind him. Luke's head tilted to the side, dread creeping up his spine.

"(Y/N)-?" He gently shook your hand, trying not to startle you incase you were just zoning out again.

But that's when it hit him. His fingers wrapped around your wrist, there was nothing. No pulse.

"(Y/N)?!"

The young angel screamed as tears flooded down his cheeks, shaking your body. He kept calling out your name but you never responded. He tried everything he could; giving CPR, using his magic - he even consider using the life trees leaves from the celestial realm.

He just - you couldn't be- he wouldn't let you! He's your guardian angel! Yours not supposed to be -! Not yet!!!

NOT YET!!

Your soul spilled out of your chest, he sobbed as it formed into an orb. He hugged it close to his chest as he cried, Begging it to return to your body.

"please.... please-! I'm asking nicely- why won't you go back?! It isn't time! Please!"

No matter how hard he pressed your soul back to your chest it refused to enter your body.

You were gone.

#obey me #obey me shall we date #gamingclubpresident #aracadejohn217 9 #obey me mc #obey me luke #obey me imagine #obey me angst #angst #tw: death

258 notes · View notes

sanstropfremir · 2 years

Note

I don’t know if you’re already aware of them but I came across a group called TAN with their debut song du du du (they were formed out of a show called extreme debut:wild idol). I’m OBSESSED with the song for some reason and wanted your thoughts on the music video.

tan my second gen flop group reject beloveds......... you're obsessed with the song bc it's fucking GOOD that's why!!!! also i was not kidding they are hardcore channelling second gen with everything they've fucking got: from the song itself (r&b is decidedly not on trend rn) to the fact that the mv was filmed with $12 but they refused to use any location filming that would smooth out the rough edges to the prop based choreo to the STYLING!!!!!!!!! it is absolutely not reflected in the mv at all but all their music show stages are based around this black/white/gradiant duality styling that is soooooooooooooooo 'we have $8 and some pocket lint and a stray safety pin but by god we're gonna make this work' of second gen like my eyes blew out of my head every new stage i watched. like look at this!:

youtube

if someone had told me that was from 120322 instead of from 220312 i would have wholecloth believed them. the only thing that gives them away is that there isn't enough eyeliner. the ONLY thing. and i'm not even joking this is not at all a one off, this was a dedicated intentional choice that they upheld for their ENTIRE promo period:

youtube

but by far my favourite is 220326 music core where they have GRADIENT TUXEDOS!!!!!!! actually my other favourite is this gradient pink inkigayo stage, because obviously. it would have been so easy for their stylists to just slap some generic fourth gen type normal clothes on them (which to an extent they did do in the mv), but instead they really dug into this old style coordinating + themed outfits. the mv struggles a bit because there are a lot of ideas happening but see also aforementioned budget of $12. obviously companies wanna put out something big for a debut mv so i don't fault them there but i think they should have encorporated more of the opposites theme of the styling+choreo into the visuals of them mv itself. they could have done a lot more with light/dark imagery and with the umbrella in the choreo they could have gone for a gentleman/'kingsmen' concept that would have been a lot cleaner of a visual and also would smooth over some of the visual discrepency between the fact that one of the members first debuted TEN YEARS AGO and the maknae is still 17, and they can't really do the sexy second gen concept i think they were partially trying to go for. the gratuituous ass shot of taehoon was extremely funny though. you can do very stylized mvs for cheap (see my cheap mvs post!) and i think if they had done something similar to knk's sunset or even oneus' valkyrie (speaking of other insanely good debuts) where there's a heavy emphasis on lighting and camera angles and editing, it would have made much more of an impact. the less money you have to work with the harder it becomes to make maximalist decorated sets work, and sometimes you do have to sacrifice in some areas. regardless of that though i think their debut was success and if you haven't listened to the rest of their mini you should because all the songs fuck (i really hope we get a comeback from them because i want the second half of fix you so bad) and it's very pretty clear that they're all talented and have the vocal chops to back themselves up; see this acapella cover!!

youtube

anyways i'll leave y'all with this parting meme that i made when they first debuted:

#kpop questons #tan w #tan #peep jaejun holding the younger members hands in the foreground of that acapella mv he knows what he is doing!!#they put him in the centre for a reason!!#jaejun 🤝 eunkwang in love poem: handholding the babies #i have been saying for years at this point that oneus is the closest anyone has got to filling vixx's shoes #and that's all the way down to being essentially a soft second gen reboot styling #valkyrie is basically what i would have expected the dududu mv to look like if i had only seen the stages #im saying this like valkyrie didnt cost like a million dollars i bet she was SO expensive #with that giant custom stage/lighting cube shape thing #oh maybe a better example would have been onlyoneof mvs. theyre really good at style #text #answers #by hook or by crook we're gonna keep u employed jaejun!!! third time's the charm!!!!!#i say that like he isn't employed as an actual producer lmao #the whiplash i felt when i found out he debuted in c clown. i cannot explain. like physical neck cracking happened #this poor mf has debuted in THREE groups and he's only a 97line. insanity #imo the english version of dududu is better than the kr version on the whole BUT it does not have jooan's sexy growl #so therefore they are equal. and no i am not going to talk about how it was my second most played song in march

13 notes · View notes

ushittyoldman · 3 years

Text

nobody’s fault but mine (pt. 2)

Levi wouldn’t really be Levi if he knew how to handle his intense feelings for you.

pairing. levi x fem!reader AND a little bit of jean x fem!reader (b/c once again i am a slut 4 jean too)

warnings. some fluff, language (b prepared for a lot of the f-bomb)

a/n. hi sorry 4 the long wait, life is a little hectic rn (it’s snowing n our power has been going out on n off for the past few days lmfao also school b lowkey kicking my ass) BUT i wanted 2 say thank u so so much 4 all ur feedback to part 1 it was so so so unexpected n sweet n flattering i literally still can’t wrap my head around it. i would rly appreciate some feedback 2 this one too since this is A LOT more levi n i actually adored writing him but i would luv 2 know what u guys think of my characterization of him (im a little nervy) but yes feedback is encouraged! this is kinda long but a lot happens so i rly hope u guys appreciate this n enjoy it bc it took me so long 2 write n rewrite it heheheh (side note 4 the sake of age n everything, all the 104th cadets r actually 18+ including our cute lil reader) also! pls continue 2 request more levi ok that’s it 4 now enjoy!

“Rise and shine, sleeping beauty.”

“Jean!”

The hushed voices stirred you out of the pleasant state of unconsciousness you had been in. A sharp pain shot through your head as you slowly opened your eyes, blinking quickly to adjust to the bright light. You flexed your fingers subtly as an attempt to gain awareness of yourself and your surroundings. Once you were comfortable, you slowly turned your head to your right and saw a scene you had grown painfully familiar with– Jean arguing with someone. The victim of the week was Armin, and you almost wanted to laugh at the quick back-and-forth between the two.

“Your bedside manner… sucks,” you managed to mumble. You cringed at the uncharacteristic hoarseness of your voice.

“There she is!” Jean exclaimed, shooting a victorious smirk at Armin, before fondly looking down at you, as he moved closer to your side.

You heard multiple gasps of your name, and you quickly turned your head to your left, before regretting it due to the sharp pang that followed in your head. Nevertheless, you mustered up as bright a smile as you could, looking at your friends who had all taken various positions throughout the room. Eren was the first to your bed, embracing you tightly.

“That was scary,” he softly mumbled your name, before pulling back, “Don’t do that again.”

The concern on his face startled you momentarily, and you couldn’t help but avert your eyes. You blinked quickly before looking up and shyly smiling at Eren.

“I’ll keep that in mind for next time.”

You then looked up at your fellow cadets, who stood surrounding your small bed in the infirmary. Your love for these people sat heavily in your chest, and you beamed up at them, before you realized you were in the infirmary.

“What happened?” you genuinely asked, your husky voice taking you by surprise again.

“Oh, I’ll tell you what happened!” Jean scowled, crossing his arms in anger, “That little bastard—”

“Jean, you can’t say that about the Captain!” Sasha chided, looking sideways in fear as if to emphasize her point.

“Captain, my ass!”

You attempted to stifle your giggling, yet your mood significantly dropped upon remembering Levi’s treatment towards you this past month. You tried to conceal your obviously bothered expression, but you felt a hand softly ruffle your hair. You looked up and smiled at Reiner.

“Don’t sweat it, kiddo, I’m sure he’ll tone down the punishments after this,” he reassured, obviously mistaking your dejection over your unreciprocated feelings for Levi for something else.

Appreciating the gesture, you continued to smile up at him while nodding softly. Reiner had a comforting presence, and you felt your mood brighten slightly.

“Fingers crossed,” you deadpanned, earning a soft laugh from Bertholdt, who had taken a seat at the foot of your bed.

Jean’s relentless bashing of the Captain continued, as Sasha, Connie, and Armin attempted to calm him down, warning him about the consequences they’d all have to face if word got back to Levi. Eren gritted his teeth in irritation, as he glared up at Jean, threatening to “knock him out if he didn’t shut up,” while Mikasa had silently moved around the chaos to rest her calloused hand on your own, silently squeezing as a gesture of comfort. You squeezed back.

“Look, all I’m saying is he obviously has it out for her. She’s a better soldier than all of us– even you, titan boy— and it’s still not good enough? I call bullshit!”

“I think he’s just trying to be a good teacher, I’m sure there’s a lot I can still improve on,” you justified, and all eyes turned to you.

“There’s not,” Mikasa bluntly stated, leaving no room for argument.

Your friends all agreed, and you scrunched your nose playfully to conceal the warmth that had spread throughout your body at their praise. You worked hard to get where you were– there was a satisfaction in knowing that all of your effort wasn’t going unacknowledged.

“Jean-boy’s right—”

“Bastard!”

“—Captain Levi has been unnecessarily cruel to her, and we’ve all noticed it!” Eren’s fists clenched in anger as he ignored Jean’s yelling.

“But the Captain isn’t the type to hold grudges or act impulsively, so I think there’s something deeper to it,” Armin reasoned, apologetically glancing at you in case his words offended you.

You nodded softly, not wanting to worsen your headache; however, it didn’t really matter when Jean’s painfully loud voice retaliated almost immediately.

“He overworked her to the point of her passing out from exhaustion and severe dehydration!” His eyebrows furrowed in anger, and his sandy brown hair bounced with his every move.

You winced from the pain in your head, and the movement didn’t go unnoticed by Reiner, who glanced at you from where he stood.

“Jean— inside voice, yeah?” Reiner softly spoke, subtly tilting his head down towards you. Jean’s gaze softened and concern replaced the anger on his contorted features, as he apologized to you.

“Yeah, seriously, what are you getting so worked up for?” Connie innocently asked, before a knowing look crossed his features. He turned to his partner-in-crime, and the two donned shit-eating grins as they turned back to Jean.

“Right, that’s why.”

Bertholdt, whose lanky body had been horizontally lying across the bed comfortably, sat up onto his elbows and cluelessly asked, “What’s why?”

Sasha’s smile widened, and she crossed her arms, mimicking Connie’s knowing smirk. “It’s because Jean-boy, here, is sweet on our dear little—”

“Would you shut up!” Jean yelled louder than before, fists shaking in anger. His face was flushed an impossible shade of red, and you would’ve joined in on the laughter, had your head not exploded from the pain.

You were fully aware of the incessant teasing Jean received regarding his relationship with you, and you would honestly be lying if you said you didn’t get a kick out of it as well. Deciding to spare your friend today, you sent a good-natured smile to him, hoping that would be enough to quell his frustration.

Had you not turned to converse with Eren, you wouldn’t have missed Jean’s dazed smile.

While talking to Eren, your mind briefly drifted to Levi and the situation that was weighing heavily on you. You didn’t want to believe that the Captain hated you– you desperately grasped onto your excuse that he was simply a harsh teacher. And yet, you knew there was something more to it.

In a panic-driven moment, you momentarily wondered if he had somehow found out about your feelings for him. You remembered him telling you about his upbringing— you knew better than most that Levi and confessions of love did not go together... at all. Before you could further dig yourself deeper into the pitiful hole you had been in the past month, a painfully familiar voice broke through your intrusive thoughts.

“You know how loud you are? This isn’t a damn daycare.”

“Sir!”

All conversation in the room came to an abrupt halt. You couldn’t help but grow amused at the sight of Eren and Bertholdt scrambling off your bed to stand and salute their superior. Your small smile was wiped off your face when your eyes met stormy grey ones. You quickly looked down, before inhaling quickly and swiftly pulling your bedsheets back. You attempted to muster as much strength as you could, ignoring the multiple eyes on you. You gracefully stood up from the bed, and turned to Levi, managing the salute as well. You slowly looked up at him.

“Sir,” you shakily mumbled, internally cringing once again at the uncharacteristic rasp to your voice.

You received proud looks of admiration from your friends, though Jean’s remained more concerned than proud. Idiot! he thought to himself. We know you’re strong, now’s not the time to prove it!

Levi, meanwhile, had tried his very best to suppress the guilt that had been eating away at him for the past day; however, it had only worsened when he saw you and heard your weak voice. Upon making eye contact with you, he almost wanted to fall to his knees and apologize profusely for everything he had put you through, audience be damned.

Levi had spent the better half of the day pacing around your room in the infirmary wing of the Scout Regiment’s base, lost deeply in his thoughts, as his concern for you weighed heavily in his heart. After a few more hours of pacing, he had finally come to the conclusion that he was an idiot (a grade A, unique brand of idiot all in a league of his very own), and that he was in love with you.

Where the first realization annoyed him to high heaven, the second one brought him a sense of peace that was only heightened every time he had looked at your unconscious form.

Levi, uncomfortable with the amount of self-actualizing he had done that day, had left the room after softly caressing your cheek, hoping to convey all of his guilt and apologies and love into the simple gesture. Once he was away from the infirmary wing of the base, he inhaled deeply, itching for the comfort of a cup of warm tea. On his way to the mess hall, he had passed by your friends from the 104th, all undoubtedly on their way to see you. Levi’s eyebrow had slightly risen upon noticing the varying looks of defiance and anger on each of their faces. He had remained unfazed, his half-lidded eyes looking away, as if he hadn’t even seen them at all.

Somehow, it was harder to face them now with you standing amongst them.

His face retained its usual impassive and bored expression, yet it momentarily faltered when he noticed you slightly stumble from where you were standing next to the hospital bed. Levi’s heartbeat quickened, and he made a subtle move to rush over to you to catch you for the second time that day, but Jean was quicker. The taller man had been keeping a watchful eye on you, and had quickly dropped his salute to stand behind you and steady your slightly uncoordinated form. You comfortably relaxed backwards into his arms as you sent a grateful smile up at him, and he softly smiled back in response, leading you back to the bed.

Levi was both relieved and a little fucking pissed off.

“Visiting hours are over— I need to talk to the brat,” he lazily said, authority ringing loudly and clearly in his command.

For the first time in all his years of captaining the scouts, there was a quick hesitation after his command.

Levi raised an unamused eyebrow at each of the cadets, silently challenging them to disobey him. Despite his threatening aura, he wouldn’t blame any of your friends if they were to defy Levi. The Captain deserved it for his treatment of you— he’d take it like a man.

Your eyes widened in surprise when your friends subtly glanced at you, silently asking if it was okay to leave you alone with him. Upon hearing Levi’s request to talk to you, your heart had begun to uncontrollably race and you swore you could feel it in your throat. You were disappointed in yourself for growing excited at finally being able to talk to him.

Blinking quickly, your cheeks grew hot under everyone’s gazes, so you reassuringly smiled at your eight friends, and you once again felt the genuine love you had for them erupt within your heart.

Ever the peacemaker of the group, Armin signaled for the rest to follow him out of the room, and they each uncertainly walked behind him. Mikasa squeezed your hand once more before following closely behind Eren, who sent you an encouraging smile. Bertholdt subtly sent a thumbs up to you, while Reiner winked at you as he looked over his broad shoulder. Your smile widened; however, it faltered when your eyes met Jean’s. His irritated expression worried you, yet before you could respond, he turned away and walked past Levi.

Levi had to give it to Jean— not many people had the balls to openly glare at the Captain.

Once everyone was gone, the tension within the room increased tenfold. You looked at Levi, and you bit your lip in contemplation, anticipating what he would say. Many thoughts rang through your head.

Was it another punishment? Was he going to yell at me? Did he find out about my fee–

“How do you feel?”

You almost had to pinch yourself. After one month of barely any interactions with your friend— if you were still even allowed to call him that— you realized how starved you were for pleasant conversation with Levi.

“I’ve been better,” you breathed out, still cautious. “How… how do you feel?”

Even after such an unpleasant experience, your unwavering kindness shone just as brightly. Levi’s heart ached so sweetly, and he internally groaned upon realizing how fucking whipped he was.

He silently stepped forward, pulling a seat to the side of your bed. Once he was seated, Levi looked into your eyes, and you felt your breath hitch at the intensity of the swirl of emotions dancing within his normally cold eyes. He exhaled softly.

You noticed how tired he looked.

“Just peachy.”

There was a pregnant pause, and you came to realize that there was just too much you wanted to say to him, and you didn’t know where to start. Your soft eyes held his sharp gaze.

“You scared the shit out of me, brat.”

Your heart involuntarily skipped a beat, and your eyes widened in response.

“I did?” you internally slapped yourself at your stupid response.

“Yeah. You did.”

“Sorry, sir,” you softly mumbled.

“Levi… just Levi.”

The Levi in front of you was a completely different man from the one who you’ve had the pleasure of interacting with over the past month. You thought back to your friends and their anger at your mistreatment, and you thought of the many unfair punishments, cold shoulder treatments, and overworking during training (despite you being second only to Humanity’s Strongest, himself). Slowly, your incredulity at being treated like a lapdog began to dim and was replaced by your growing indignation. Though you were no stranger to standing up for yourself, you still felt your anxiety skyrocket as you looked back up at your superior.

“Do you hate me, Captain? Did I… did I do something?”

And there it was.

Levi knew the question would come up at some point, and yet he still felt ill-prepared in his response. He knew this was a big step for you— in the whole year that he’s gotten to know you, he learned how much you hated confrontation. You blatantly ignoring his request and choosing to address him by his title caught his attention, and he frowned. When he looked into your slightly watery eyes, a warmth spread throughout his chest, and he had to clear his throat.

“Don’t say shit like that, you haven’t done anything.”

Levi wanted to punch himself— he was never good with words.

You, however, weren’t fazed by the manner in which he spoke. You had fallen for the man, harsh words and all.

“Then why have you—” you paused as you momentarily lost your voice.

Levi thought it was cute (to be fair, he found everything about you endearing), yet he knew it would be inappropriate to openly admire you when you were so clearly upset with him.

“Sorry,” you grew embarrassed and licked your lips, “It’s just… well, why have you been ignoring me? And— and yelling at me? We stopped drinking tea together, and practicing in the forests. You don’t even acknowledge me when I talk to you! I’m sure you have a really good reason, sir, but I just—”

Levi detested the sick feeling of guilt that churned within his heart. In hindsight, he really should’ve thought it through before he began his little plan of distancing himself from you. How else was he supposed to tell you oh, everyone in the fucking Scout Regiment wants you, and so do I, but I haven’t done anything about it because I’m a pussy, so I just decided to take it out on you and wallow in my own self-pity like the sad little man I am, without sounding like he was deranged.

“—I just miss you.”

Levi’s eyes widened a fraction of an inch, and his breath hitched. This time it was the sincerity in your eyes that made him look away quickly.

“I…”

I’ve missed you too, dammit.

At his lack of a response, your eyebrows furrowed, and your irritation grew. Your small hands balled the soft bedsheet, and you swallowed to soften the burn in your throat before speaking.

“Why did you even come here?” you scoffed indignantly, attempting to mask your hurt, “Was it to just to yell at me some more? Oh, I know! Maybe I need to run through training ten more times again, right?”

The guilt churned even more in his chest, and Levi seriously wanted to punch himself. He willed himself to say something— anything— but he felt speechless in front of you.

“Levi,” you hoarsely spoke with desperation, and he looked into your watery eyes. “Say something, please.”

It was as if you had read his mind, and a slight feeling of reassurance quelled the storm in his heart; you really were the only one for him. As he met your eyes— your beautiful, enchanting eyes— he felt his self-hatred skyrocket at the amount of hurt in them. He had grown used to seeing them filled with humor, kindness, and a soft edge that was rare to find nowadays. Yet seeing them filled with such pain and hurt was unsettling, and Levi went mute for the fifth time that day.

You nodded in understanding when he failed to say anything, and your heart clenched. Jean had been right— you were nothing more than a lovesick puppy. You blinked quickly as a poor attempt to conceal your tears, yet nothing ever escaped the Captain’s attention.

His gaze softened, and Levi found out something else about himself— he really didn’t like seeing you cry.

“Shit, please don’t cry,” he tenderly mumbled, as he leaned closer to you and gently cupped your face to wipe away your tears with the pads of his thumb.

Your breath hitched and your full lips involuntarily parted. You relished in the warmth of his touch, and you wanted nothing more than to lean into his comforting hand. Your name fell from his lips, and you felt yourself come back to reality. Remembering just how you had gotten into this situation, you decided to stand your ground. Despite everything in your body begging to give in and accept this moment with the Captain, you stood unwavering in your decision.

You gently grabbed his large hand with both your hands, and moved it away from your face and into your lap. You held it there loosely and delicately rubbed your fingers over his hand soothingly before eventually stopping, and looking back up at him.

His usual bored expression was long gone, and in its place was a very tender and vulnerable expression. A storm was brewing in his grey eyes, and you distantly remembered stargazing once with him. You had desperately wished you could read his thoughts— somehow, you had found his daunting eyes more fascinating than the starry sky. You felt an ache in your heart at the intimate memories, and you really really wished Levi loved you the way you love him.

“You know what, Levi? It doesn’t even matter if you hate me, because—” you inhaled sharply.

This has to be done, you reassured yourself, or else you’d be subjecting yourself to an onslaught of hurt and heartbreak.

“—Because I hate you.”

Your lip quivered and your broken voice faltered. And of course, Levi noticed.

His eyes darted down to your lips at the slight movement. His hands had stilled, and he decided that getting eaten by a damn titan would be much less painful than this.

And then he’s looking at you. You looked back at him, yet he’s looking at you— through you— in that way that makes you want to hide and hold your ground at the same time.

“Right,” Levi drawled, and you knew he didn’t believe you (hell, you were unconvinced yourself). His eyes reverted back to their cold nature, and he ran a hand through his hair, allowing the silky strands to softly land against his forehead.

He stood up, and wordlessly gave you a onceover. Under his scrutiny, you felt yourself grow insecure, but deep down you desperately hoped he’d stay. You bit your bottom lip in apprehension, and Levi’s eyes softened at the sight of your nervous habit.

How is it that he could kill titans all the livelong day yet when it came to this sweet girl, so small and disarming, he couldn’t even utter a single word?

Levi had never felt more pathetic. He peered down at you, momentarily debating whether it would be right for him to attempt one last thing before finally deciding fuck it, and gently cupping your cheek for the third time that day, bending down, and pressing a soft kiss to the top of your head. He gingerly inhaled your enticing scent, appreciating how even after the hell he had put you through, you still smelled so alluring.

You were positive that Levi could hear your heartbeat. You blinked many times in disbelief, as he pulled away and sent one last lingering gaze down at you.

Levi slightly smirked at the pretty blush that had colored your cheeks, his half-lidded eyes drinking in the mesmerizing sight of you sitting up in your bed and gaping up at him, your cheeks flushed and wet with the remnants of your tears. He turned around and silently left the room.

He had ignored every part of his body that begged him to stay.

▲▼▲

“Shut up, I can barely hear them!”

“Ow— Bertholdt, you’re stepping on my foot!”

“Oh, sorry.”

“Watch it, horse face!”

“Eren.”

“You piece of shit, I’m—”

The piece of bread that had been tightly held in Sasha’s grip suddenly fell to the floor. Everyone went silent.

“Holy shit, I think… I think he just kissed her.”

Jean really hoped Sasha was wrong.

He decided to ignore the fact that her freakishly good hearing bordered on supernatural, so there was really no way she could’ve been wrong with a mere wooden door standing between her and the conversation.

“I knew there was something going on between them! Reiner— pay up.”

Reiner muttered several curses under his breath as he pulled out a hefty stack of cash from his pocket. Connie’s grin widened.

Armin had glanced up at Jean, slightly alarmed at the dark expression on his face. Before he could comfort his friend, the door suddenly opened. Everyone scrambled to straighten themselves up, attempting to act like they hadn’t been just eavesdropping on the entire conversation between you and the Captain.

A chorus of sir’s rang throughout the large hallway, and Levi grew amused at the sight before him. His lips twitched upwards, and the cadets had to almost physically stop their mouths from dropping open at the sight. Levi’s ghost of a smile disappeared when his eyes met Jean’s seething ones.

The two held each other’s gazes, Levi’s expression being cool, while Jean’s had been irritated. Levi was not a fucking idiot; he knew the kid was in love with you.

Join the fucking club.

Levi, realizing that this was the exact reason he had gotten himself into that mess with you and not really wanting to sour his somewhat good mood, looked away from Jean to nod at the group of your friends.

“As you were.”

He brushed past Jean, his gaze as intimidating as ever, as he silently walked down the hallway. Jean’s fists clenched tightly. Once Levi had turned the corner, the group exploded into chatter, their reactions varying from stunned to adoring.

Jean really really fucking hoped Sasha was wrong.

▲▼▲

Your horse trotted proudly through the vast landscape, the wind blew through your open hair, your friends teased each other amicably, and your excitement grew at finally being cleared to join the scouts on their next expedition. Though you hadn’t been getting much sleep lately, and you’ve been a little too preoccupied to eat much, nothing could bring your mood down at this moment.

You were alongside your friends as you all followed the section commanders as their horses galloped into the edge of the forest. The mission for today was to exterminate any titans who had wandered too close to the walls. A simple mission, and you were more than capable.

You had been in a great mood.

Until your eyes landed on Levi.

He had been further up, leading his own squad. He had turned around to respond to Gunther, and that’s when his eyes had met yours. Your internal conflict grew, and you ultimately ended up averting your eyes and ignoring him, deciding to maintain your cold treatment towards him.

Him kissing your head had only further confused you, despite the sweet butterflies you felt every time you thought back to it. Levi’s treatment towards you had unexpectedly changed since that day in the infirmary, and it had reverted to the way it was before his sudden aversion to you, though there was something much sweeter in his actions. You swore you were getting whiplash.

Though he had been significantly kinder to you, you had held your ground, unrelenting in your declaration. Part of you was terrified that if you gave in and became comfortable, he’d suddenly return back to the yelling, the punishments, and the overworking. Part of you also didn’t want to face reality— your feelings were unreciprocated, and they would only serve to bring you a world of heartache and sadness.

Your cold shoulder towards him was nothing compared to the way he had treated you. Yours mainly consisted of avoiding him, and when that wasn’t an option and you had to interact with him, you kept it civil and short. Your heart would ache, but you knew it was for the best. It helped that Jean would offer approving smiles and words of encouragement, even going as far as to smirk when you had ignored the Captain.

Levi, meanwhile, had frowned when he noticed that you ignored him. Again.

In all honesty, he did deserve it, but that didn’t mean it still didn’t hurt like a bitch. He grew irked at your display. Levi hoped you would understand that him kissing your head and showing affection towards you was his grand confession of love. You knew he was shit with words, and he hoped that that would be enough.

He was sadly fucking mistaken.

His attention had been on you the whole mission. Even when the scouts had to dismount from the horses to use the ODM gear through the trees, he had somehow managed to keep a watchful eye on you. You were graceful as ever as you flew through the trees, though his observing gaze noticed that your reaction time was noticeably slower than normal. He had also noticed the dark circles under your usually bright eyes, and he grew worried upon noticing your overall state.

Levi, himself, wasn’t faring much better. He was getting virtually no sleep, running completely on caffeine, adrenaline, and pure will, yet he still made sure he was in excellent shape when it came to these missions— humanity was resting on his shoulders, after all.

The firing of a flare gun in the distance indicated that the group would be encountering titans— a lot of titans— from the left. The soldiers prepared, all eyes focused on the left. You had conveniently taken up the right-most end of the formation, and your attention had also been on the left, your blades held tightly in your hands.

It was only by chance that Levi decided to glance down at you as he soared above you in the middle of the formation. Your eyes met once again, and Levi’s heart lurched at the beautiful sight, when movement behind you immediately caught his attention. A large abnormal with the ability to jump from tree to tree had suddenly appeared and made an attempt to grab you. Your attention had been solely on Levi, so you hadn’t noticed, especially over the roar of the wind in your ears.

Levi’s eyes widened, and he yelled out your name. The rich baritone of his deep voice reached your ears, and you turned slightly behind you, yet you reacted too slowly. Your body jerked backwards, flying so far from the group. You flew through the air at such a great speed that it took you by surprise when you slammed against a tree as the wires of your ODM gear grew tangled. The abnormal had missed you— barely. Your head slammed against the tree and you felt the wind knocked out of your body at the impact.

You whimpered at the hell of a hospital stay you’d have to face after this.

The abnormal almost seemed to be grinning wider upon realizing that it had successfully subdued you. You attempted to quickly stand up, though your body yelled in agony at the movement. Willing yourself to fight back, you shakily stood up, tightly gripping your blades that had miraculously not fallen to the ground throughout the struggle. You winced at the searing pain that shot through your head, yet you clenched your teeth in determination. Realizing that your gear was broken and therefore useless, you quickly discarded yourself of it, and felt some of the tension in your body alleviate now that you were significantly lighter.

“The hell is she doing?” Jean yelled incredulously from his spot next to Levi, and the other members of the group looked on in shock as they all attempted to make it to you in time.

“She’s fighting back,” Levi spoke through gritted teeth, his worry for you eating him alive. His eyebrows were furrowed in stress and anxiety, and he was now soaring impossibly fast through the trees in order to reach you.

Stupid brat. Stupid, resilient, little brat.

“Attagirl!” Oluo and Eld cheered, and Petra shoved them, warning them to stop their blatant ogling in the middle of a dangerous mission. They skillfully dodged her attack, grinning at their adept use of the ODM gear.

A noise towards the side caught their attention, and the group realized the titans they had been anticipating were now in sight. Levi coolly assessed the shitty situation, before commanding that most of the soldiers take care of the titans, while Levi, his squad, and some of the 104th’s cadets would assist you. The group split up, and Levi turned his attention back to you, his heart thumping against his chest.

As the titan made a move to grab you, you exhaled quickly to focus before skillfully jumping onto its elongated arm and running quickly towards its nape. You were defying gravity as you gained speed the higher you went. The titan wasn’t stupid, and it began to grab you with its other arm, yet you anticipated its move. You lithely dodged it, executing a quick front flip as you narrowly escaped its grasp once again.

This was it!

You saw your opening. You leaped forward and pushed your feet against its shoulder as hard as you could, soaring high up in the air above the titan. Muscle memory served you well, and you thought back to the training circuit that had mimicked a situation almost exactly like this one. You gracefully began to spin yourself faster and faster, your cape billowing behind you as you finally readied your blades for the final blow. You yelled out, as your head pain worsened. As a result, your maneuver faltered slightly, almost imperceptible to the human eye. The titan noticed.

It lashed a large hand out again, attempting to grab you, but it accidentally slapped your body away. You cried out in pain, and you flew in the direction of your friends, hurtling towards the ground. You were falling so fast, and you felt yourself grow dizzy from being chucked around so much in the last five minutes.

Eren yelled out your name, a whimper stuck in his throat at the sight of your almost lifeless body spiraling downwards. Jean’s eyes widened, and he knew he wouldn’t be able to make it in time.

Levi’s heart stopped upon witnessing the titan slap your body with so much force. You were plummeting towards the ground at an impossible speed, and he didn’t even think twice before withdrawing his ODM gear’s hooks and diving towards you within the blink of an eye. His cape flew behind him, and a determined glint had overtaken his angry features.

You had been bordering between consciousness and unconsciousness, yet the sight above you had been so clear that it almost felt as if everything was moving in slow motion. Your long hair flew around you, creating a curtain around your face, as you looked up at Levi. He had dived towards you, his jaw so tightly clenched. His muscular long arm began reaching out to you. The ground was quickly approaching, and you felt a sense of serenity at the sight of your Captain, despite your confusion and the severity of this situation.

“Levi,” you mumbled, smiling softly.

His face dropped upon seeing the calm expression on your face, and he willed himself to go faster, a number of expletive curses ringing through his head.

That damn titan. Did it know how small you were? How precious you were?

He spun himself slightly to gain momentum, and he saw you were just within reach. Levi confidently stretched his strong arm out even more, managing to wrap his hand around your arm. He swiftly pulled you into his chest, one arm wrapping around your waist, while the other hand cradled your head protectively against his broad chest. He swiftly flipped himself around to face his body upwards, further ensuring he’d take the majority of the blow in case you two ended up hitting the ground, and shot both of his ODM gear’s hooks into a nearby tree, propelling both of you away from the ground and towards the high branch. You fleetingly realized how familiar this position felt.

Once Levi safely landed, he kneeled, and supported your body against his thigh as he continued to hold you in his arms. He quickly looked over his shoulder, and could make out the sight of the titan falling to the ground. All the members of his squad seemed alive and well, so he turned his attention back to you. His eyes quickly darted over your face, desperately searching for any obvious injuries.

Your eyes fluttered open at the feeling of Levi running his hands through your hair and over your cheeks. The Levi in front of you was leagues different from the cool and composed one you had come to know. He had a frantic look in his eyes, his jaw clenched tightly, as he desperately peered down at you.

“Le… Levi?” You mumbled, your voice still a little hoarse from your recent infirmary stay.

“You are so precious to me, you hear me?” He lowly spoke, panic and anger and a whole plethora of emotions coloring his normally deadpan voice.

Your jaw fell open and you were almost positive you were suffering from a mean concussion, and this was a hallucination. “Wha—”

“You’re a fucking brat— an incredibly frustrating, resilient little brat— but you’re mine.”

You dazedly looked up at him, and you realized how close his face was to yours. His muscular chest was heaving up and down, and a small droplet of sweat dripped down from his hairline. Levi’s handsome features held nothing but adoration for you, and in that moment nothing could bring you down from the high you were experiencing. You felt his warm hands cup your cheek once more, a habit he seemed to be fond of.

“You want a fucking declaration of love? Here it is— if anything happens to you, I swear I’ll kill every titan on this piece of shit planet,” he spoke, surprisingly unbothered with how vulnerable he was being with you. He moved closer to you, his forehead nearly resting on your own. “I don’t give a fuck if you hate me or not. You’re mine, and I’m yours. And that’s all there is to it.”

Your hand creeped up to grasp the wrist of the hand that had been caressing your face, and you tightened your fingers around it. He froze, momentarily wondering if you were rejecting his confession, and he internally groaned at the thought.

There’d be no coming back from this one.

“You’re mine?” You shakily asked, a gloriously beautiful smile slowly gracing your features.

“That’s what I said,” he mumbled, attempting to conceal how lovestruck he felt at your smile.

“After… after we get home and I get some medical attention, you’re going to have to kiss me, alright? I’m—”

You were cut off by his lips pressing against your own. Your eyes fluttered shut, and you relished in the soft feeling of his lips molding against yours. You felt an indescribable warmth erupt in your chest, and you whimpered against Levi’s lips. His kiss was soft and warm, a huge contrast to the Levi from this past month. He pulled away just as quickly as he had bent down.

“One for the road,” he simply explained, glancing down at you. He internally smirked at the pretty blush coloring your cheeks— he was always fond of the sight.

▲▼▲

“You’re not serious.”

“Do I look like I’m joking?”

You stifled your giggles at Levi’s straight face. Your expression still showed your disbelief at what he had just told you.

“I’m not an idiot, Levi, I know how some people look at me,” you laughed, rolling your eyes playfully.

“Even the Commander?”

“Oh, I’m working my way up through the ranks right now, can’t you tell?” You teased, gesturing down to your intertwined bodies, as you both faced each other in his warm bed.

“You’re funny, brat,” he deadpanned, no heat and all fondness as he affectionately pinched your cheeks.

You snuggled deeper into his chest, savoring the warmth that you were enveloped in. You were wearing his shirt— still warm and smelling strongly of him— and you inhaled softly as your face pressed deeper into his chest. Somehow, the slight aftermath of your headache from the recent expedition began to dull slightly.

“I’m sorry again,” Levi murmured, softly cradling your head against his chest.

“Really? I couldn’t tell the first five hundred times you said so,” you teased, looking up at him. Your breath hitched at the sight of his face angled down towards you, dark wisps of hair falling over his eyes and structured face. Levi was so painfully handsome, you could feel your heart flutter.

His eyes were intense, and his guilt continued to stir within his stomach. Seemingly able to read his mind, you pressed a chaste kiss to his warm chest.

“Idiot,” you mumbled, “I really wouldn’t care if the King himself came up to me and proposed, and you know exactly why.”

“Humor me.”

“Terrifying guy, goes by the name of Humanity’s Strongest Soldier?”

He chuckled lowly, the deepness of his voice vibrating through his chest, and your insides turned to mush. Feeling relieved at successfully pulling Levi out of his little hole of guilt, you yawned softly. Your bruised ribs still ached at times, yet you ignored it this time to cuddle deeper into Levi, who was also on the verge of sleep.

He was sleepily looking down at you, observing your attempts to get comfortable in his embrace, and he softly smiled to himself. His muscular arms tightened around you, one of his hands coming to rest on the soft curve of your hip. He relished in the fact that sleep would be coming easily to him with you here. Levi had surprised himself with how easily he was able to show his affections toward you, and he chalked it up to that being further proof that you really were the only one for him.

He felt a warmth come from the sweet pang in his chest, and it spread throughout his entire body. Levi had learned to associate that feeling with you.

His eyes closed silently, and you pressed one last kiss to his chest.

“Precious,” he mumbled, “Precious little brat.”

▲▼▲

#levi ackerman x reader #levi ackerman #attack on titan #attack on titan fic #shingeki no kyojin #shingeki no kyoujin #levi aot #levi fanfiction #aot fanfiction #aot #request #jean kirschtien #jean kirstein x reader

296 notes · View notes

mooniefics · 3 years

Text

okkk ermmm here have this blurb,, bc my brain is feeling so clogged rn and i’ve been seeing jean n connie content all over tiktok (b ᵔ▽ᵔ)b lowkey cucking connie here, lowkey more jean-centric, but i feel like connie would be the type to reluctantly admit that seeing u feeling good bc of another guy (especially one that y'all r good friends with) would reallllyyyy get him going LOL

you couldn’t quite remember how you’d gotten yourself into your current position.

not to say that you weren't enjoying it—that was definitely not the case. you’d become accustomed to plans going awry, like when jean had accidentally ordered a two hundred dollar champagne bottle at the club, just to drop it to the floor immediately after the scantily clad waitress taking care of your group had handed it to him, or the time that you’d made a stop for fast food on your night as designated driver and had to order connie to physically restrain sasha before she crawled through the drive-thru window and terrorized the night staff. but for the most part, every evening out ended with all of your friends going home in one piece, sometimes jean or sasha crashing at you and connie’s apartment when you were truly worried for their health post binge-drinking.

though, you couldn’t recall a night when connie had been so insistent for you to wear one of your more revealing dresses, or so openly enjoying the way jean had draped himself across you on the dance floor, doing nothing at all to intervene when he ran his hands down your body or pressed himself close enough to you that you could feel the length of his cock through his pants against your ass. you thought he had always been jealous type, usually shooing his friend away from you or shouting for him to back off with a flushed scowl etched into his features. but the way he was looking at the two of you as you danced, low-lidded eyes filled with a hunger you’d helped sate countless times before—you knew the revelation meant trouble.

the entire night had started to melt together into one continuous blur after sasha managed to talk you into downing more than enough shots of vodka to make anyone’s head spin, the only thing occupying your senses being the warmth of jean behind you, how with each sway of your hips your boyfriend’s gaze would become more and more intense, solely focused on you and his best friend’s flagrant display. somehow, you’d all made your way back to the apartment, leaving sasha in nikolo’s care after she begged to stay for a bit longer. through the mess of grabbing hands and hushed words, jean tugging you one way only for connie to pull you back to him, uncoordinated fingers unzipping and unclipping every article of clothing they could find, they’d managed to leave you completely at their mercy.

“shit, jean. you’re makin’ me kinda jealous..” connie muttered, words stringing together with obvious inebriation, one hand pinching at one of your nipples while the other kept a firm hold on your jaw, turning your head over your shoulder to face him.

he drew you back into another heated kiss before you could blink away the fog of arousal from your glassy eyes, muffling another whimper from jean’s tongue and it’s relentless motions over your clit. as if his slender fingers alone weren’t enough to make your vision spot with stars, he was ridiculously good with his mouth, leaving you a writhing, dripping mess in connie’s lap.

“not my fault i’m better at making her feel good.” jean snarked from between your legs, not stopping the snap of his wrist as he bit into the already marked flesh of your thigh, drawing another moan over connie’s lips, “maybe you should share with me more often, jus’ so she doesn’t get bored of sucking you off an’ getting nothing in return.”

“oh fuck off, you know that’s not true you fuckin’ ass.” your boyfriend grunted, tone taking on the typical aggression it had when he felt jean was getting too handsy with you, but doing nothing to actually stop him as he returned to kissing at your neck.

you allowed your back to rest against connie’s chest, a shaking hand working into jean’s hair, tangling in the thick, blonde locks when he crooked his fingers up into that terrible sensitive spot he’d been teasing as soon as he'd found it, hazel irises hungrily taking in your disoriented expression.

“’s okay, you can be honest with me.” he grinned, lips and chin drenched in the evidence of your arousal, “tell me the truth, baby.. i’ll let you cum on my fingers.”

“don’t tell him shit.” connie growled back, both hands squeezing at the soft flesh of your breasts, rolling your nipples between his thumb and forefinger.

if you were more sober, you would’ve acknowledged the fact that he would probably let you cum either way, but the stifled judgement planted the thought of an unwavering ultimatum in your mind, the idea that you might not ever get to taste the relief that lay beyond the mounting pressure in your abdomen, drawn tight enough that you felt as if you could snap at any moment.

“p-please connie..!” you whined, grinding yourself down against his crotch in an attempt to appease him, fingers latching onto his wrist and pushing a hand further over your chest, words slurred and desperate, “need t’.. need to c-cum, please please please...”

“then tell me,” jean pulled your attention back down to him, licking his wet lips, pupils blown wide, “who's better at eating this pussy? him, or me?”

he barely gave any room for a response, free hand pressing into one of your thighs to make enough room for him to return to his previous position of lapping at your clit, pushing a mindless, strained response from your parted lips, “you—f-fuck—you! y-you’re better!!”

you couldn’t think to tune into connie’s upset exclamations as your head slumped back to rest on his shoulder, hips pressing up into jean’s skillful tongue and fingers, eyes squeezing shut as you moaned out a rambled string of curses, lips barely able to form around each syllable. any kind of control you held on your volume escaped you entirely, the hand in jean’s hair gripping tight as you nearly screamed, trembling and gasping, cumming around his fingers just like he promised you would.

your chest heaved in connie’s hands, body shakily lowering itself back against him, very cognizant of how hard he felt through his pants. as soon as you’d gathered your bearings enough to sit yourself properly in his lap, you looked to jean, who looked more than satisfied with himself sitting back on his calves, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand and licking the two fingers that had previously been buried knuckle-deep into you.

“so, springer, ready to show me up?” he goaded, running a hand to push his hair out of his face, “it’s the least you can do after i got her all nice and wet for you.”

you felt your face heat, stealing a glance at your boyfriend, that flustered scowl weighing at his expression. “fuck yeah i am.”

“can’t wait to watch you try.” he laughed, grinning easily, hand sliding down to start undoing the button and zipper on his pants, dark eyes still roaming your naked finger as he pulled his cock free from the confines of his boxers.

you could tell this was going to be a long night.

hellooo my friend very quickly converting me into a full-on jean lover (o^ ^o)

138 notes · View notes

ringmyheart · 3 years

Note

hey, i was wondering if i could hv headcanons with how to fight characters? maybe when their crush's parents scold them for getting bad score at school, like that time at the end of the semester. pls do it with seong taehoon and jiyeon woo. thank you! 🥺

SEONG TAEHOON

The first thing he’s gonna do honestly is tell u to fight ur parents. U tell him about how u got a bad score and how it’s the end of the semester and the test/ur overall grade was important and he’s so used to living life the way HE wants he tells u to just. Fight them

And you’re first thought 2 say is idk how to fight? Bc what he said is just so sudden and kinda preposterous and ur upset and he’s like okay, I’ll teach u then and ur like I’m not fighting my parents 😭 and he goes okay then I’LL do it

And u have to rlly reiterate like” NOBODY is fighting my parents” first and foremost and after that he kind of just goes silent because he has no idea how to help you or what to do and u have knocked every idea he’s offered out of the park

Truthfully I don’t think he cares about grades too much for himself and this extends to you too. He doesn’t get why you’re so concerned, and his dad (I’m pretty sure form what we’ve seen so far) is really nice and laidback so it’s not like he’s ever being reprimanded so he’s also partfully angry at your parents bc they made u upset

Like rlly angry LMAO and as ur ranting to him ab how they yelled at u for bad grades he’s just like one day… one day he’s gna fight them 😐 he doesn’t make exceptions. He might tell u to tell them to watch out LMAO but he says it so dead seriously and u laugh but wonder if he’s even joking ?

He’s like okay well have u considered: running away

And u quickly dismiss that idea too bc u have nowhere to go and it’s literally just them scolding u ur like it’s not THAT srs... I’m just upset and he’s like u have a place to sta... nvm he’s not gonna b sweet if it’s not like absolutely necessary LOL

Bc of his lack of understanding or just overall interest in this kind of stuff, he just listens to u bc his advice clearly wasn’t cutting it for u.

He asks to see the grade and u hand him the test or the grade folder and it if ur grades weren’t even that bad, he’s gonna get frustrated w you and be like u have gotta b kidding me this is what ur stressed about 😐 what ur parents yelled at u for?? And he smacks u on the side of ur head and is like please tell me ur joking these are good. Anything above a C in his eyes is still really good

If ur grades were a D, he’s like neutral like okay yeah it was kinda bad but not the worst, don’t stress about it I’ve gotten tons of D’s.

And if it was an F he’s like oh okay yeah it was pretty bad like I get it. But this would just make things worse and ur like ur right I did so baaad and he’s like nonono oh no it’s not like that and he like stiffens and goes quiet when u get misty eyed I guess and wonders once again why this is so serious to you?? Who cares about grades?

He probably gets mad ur letting other ppl control ur life. We’ve seen that he hates other ppl living their lives for others or by others rules and he’s kinda frustrated at you and wishes he could just take over u for a day or something and tell ur parents off and ur talking about it and he’s narrowing his eyes at you but ur clearly upset so he’s not gonna yell at u rn. When u feel better ab this he probably will tell you to stop living by others standards but for now he’s kinda lost

He tries to convince u to rise up against ur parents and is like “are u gonna keep letting people in ur life control u?!” And it’s like a motivational pep talk and ur like “no!” And he’s like “are you gonna let THEM yell at you and hurt YOUR feelings?! Cause I sure as hell am not!” And ur getting more energetic and r like “me neither!” And he’s like “are you gonna let ur own PARENTS talk to YOU like that?!” And u go “no!!” Nd he’s like “we r sick of it!!” And u go “ya we r 😭” and then he thinks ur on board so he’s like good!! Let’s go beat ur parents

And ur like “what” and he realizes u weren’t on the same page the entire time so he eventually bedgrudginly will lie that idea go

And he tells you this, like he says it won’t matter in seven years, right?? So why does it matter? Pls cheer up and be doesnt outright say this but he’s like “don’t worry ur pretty little head about it” or something to cheer u up

If it works and he successfully consoles u he is rlly happy and doesn’t show it but he’ll shove his hands in his pockets and go “see?? I told you. I’m good at this advice thing.”

If it doesn’t, he’ll try to take ur mind off it and he probably just shows u his spinning back kick or something LMAO or take u to the dojo so u can either do stuff w him or just watch

But if u tell him what ur upset about isn’t grades but ur parents, he’ll listen to u tell him what they told u if it was mean or strict and if it’s rlly bad his eyes will go bloodshot and he’ll roll up his sleeves and be like okay let me at them then

Literally don’t even JOKE ab him beating up ur parents he will do it 😭😭 and worse thing is he’ll WIN. Don’t even be like “yeah I wish u would beat them up for me” bc he doesn’t draw the line between u joking and him actually doing it probably. Even if he knows ur joking, which he will bc he’s not dense he’ll use it against u and be like u have me permission and suddenly ur the instigator

He listens to u rant about them if u just want a listener and he can probably tell by ur body language… like If ur clearly wanting advice, he’ll offer u the best he can and will tell you to stick up for yourself or, if you’re really upset he’ll even consider talking to them for u. No fists to his chagrin but he’ll advocate for u and he won’t plan beforehand at all he’ll just say “I think u need 2 be nicer to ur child.” And will be like “this shit doesn’t even matter anyways” and will rip the test paper in front of them so this option is obviously not even a choice for you

If u start to cry he’ll first awkwardly do that thing that people do when they don’t know how to console someone and rub your arm and he’s like “Uhh, do u want water?” Bc he’s sad bc UR sad and doesn’t know what to do and it’s like what he’s doing isn’t that helpful but the tone in his voice is v consoling and comforting bc he’s suddenly kinda quiet 4 once

If ur sobbing he’ll hold u and u cry into his shirt and later he’ll talk about how you got it all wet but like when he goes home in the mirror and sees the tear stains it reminds him ur hurt and breaks his heart

He will study with you. And by studying it’s just him like sitting with you while you study. He doesn’t think you should study but if that’s how you want to solve this and feel better he’s down. He won’t read anything but if u have flash cards he will read them back to you and ask u questions and he doesn’t know the right answer himself (unless it’s math he’s probably rlly rlly good at math.) so u have to write them on the back. But he’s pretty good at helping u study

And if ur doing flash cards, he won’t tell u the answer until u guess it and he’s good at hinting to it and he gets annoyed VERY easily when ur not saying the answer u wrote on the back but bites it down

If ur parents make u stay home more and study as like a consequence of gettig a bad grade, he won’t have any of it

He will either confront ur parents and that either makes things somewhat better or incredibly worse

So if that’s what happens he’ll text u a lot and face time u in secret and call u a lot so even tho ur not together, every time u come home from school and open a book ur phone is hidden in the bend of it and ur fting and sometimes u don’t even talk he’s just FaceTiming u so u won’t b alone while u study and bc he misses u

Overall, he really couldn’t give a shit about grades but if need be, he’ll help u with urs, he’d be the best math tutor if ur looking, if ur parents lock u up a lot to study more bc they’re mad he will use any other option to see u, and he’ll try his best to console u despite not being that knowledgeable or understanding why you’re upset. His go to comfort option is distraction, but if it’s futile he’ll do whatever it is u wanna do. If u thank him for helping u he’ll kick something and will b like “yeah whatever I was just sick of u moping around.”

JIYEON WOO

He understands what’s going on with you all too well. When you tell him ur parents scolded u bc u didn’t do so hot in a test or ur overall grades this semester, it’s like his heart is a weight that drops into his stomach and ties his intestine into a huge knot. Like he feels the dread set in

He’s takes a muuuuchhhh more calm approach than Taehoon tbh, like while ur talking he won’t say a word and will listen. He is SUCHHH a good listener and especially now he’s just staring at you and nodding his head to let you know he’s listening to make sure u know that like he is there and present and if ur sad he’s sad too like u guys r a “team”

While ur venting, if u begin to cry he’ll let u and he’s more of a “rub-ur-back-soothingly” type of consoler so he’ll do that and if u half hug him he’ll continue do it but he’s looking at u w the saddest eyes in the world ☹️

Doesn’t rlly know what to do at first besides listen and b nice

He might even get misty eyed with u too bc he understands so much. But he won’t bring up his home situation at ALL, it’s like ur stage and he’s just a listener, he won’t make u feel like he’s comparing ur pain

His fist clenched at his side because he’s angry at your parents AND his and he’s imagining what ur parents said in his mind and even if it wasn’t that bad, he’s fuming

He might even offer to run away w u too and he “knows a place” 😭and ur like omg it’s not that bad but after reminiscing on his own home life he just assumes you’re as sick of it as him

If you’re his s/o, you obviously know about his YouTube streams, so that week at the end of every stream he’ll take a risk and unmute it and go “and don’t worry about grades too much, guys :)” and ur “guys”

Either that or he’ll do something so he will stop streaming completely for that week bc it might make u feel like he’s rubbing it in ur face how much he studies nd how studious he is and yes it gets him in trouble w his dad but when u start to feel better ab ur grades and u smile and he’s like “I thought u were upset?” And u say “oh, yeah… I’m feeling better now :)” it’s all worth it

Since he’s so consumed w streaming if u weren’t able to ever meet in person, and u had to FaceTime or text him, he probably spams u and u guys have to text at like 3am bc he’s studying all other hours of the day so he’s under his covers and reading or calling u

Like it goes

‘My parents got mad at me bc I got bad grades :(((‘ and then he sees the text he reads it and then again and is like oh no bc is it like his situation???

And then u go get a snack or something and go MIA during texting but he doesn’t know that so he spams u bc he thinks that maybe ur parents took ur phone and r locking u up like his did him so he’s like

‘Are you okay?’

‘Hello…?’

‘Where did you go? :(‘

‘Are you okay?’

‘Please be okay…’

‘(Y/n)?’

And if he suspects ur parents took ur phone and r gonna read this he sends things a very lengthy and persuasive text that explains why this is cruel and unusual and to PLS give u ur phone back and then it says seen and ur like it’s still me :)) I’m okay but thx for worrying 😭❤️

And he’s like ‘thank god…’

Since he’s a part of that newtube company (XY or something? I forgot HAHA), he has connections honestly??? So if you’re that torn over this grade he might try and pull some strings to improve your grade, make classes easier or to reach your parents even. Like he affects his parents’ boss which then butterfly effects to you

Assures you that grades aren’t that important, or tries to, but it’s so horrible coming from him because he has such good grades and it always is gonna feel like he’s just saying that no matter what

If he could he’d fail a test too to make u feel better and like ur in it together but his dad would MURDER him. So he just tries to tell u it’s okay and graders aren’t that bad

If ur mostly upset over the bad grade, he’s like it’s fine, and even if it’s a grade he genuinely considers bad he’ll look at it like “...” before going this is fine too!! :) and in his mind he’s like if I got this my dad would kill me but would NOT tell you that EVERRR. He’s gonna do anything to preserve ur feeling rn and the next few weeks he’s especially nice to u

Will study with you to make you feel better but it’s hard because he’s really far ahead tbh :(( like he explains assuming u already have some ground knowledge. BUT he’s really good at being patient so if ur like I don’t understand and get frustrated he’s like “oh I’m sorry!!! Here, I’ll go over it again.”

U guys start spending time at the library and when his dad questions him he’s like I’m studying and he really is and it’s like a study date and it actually ends up being RLLY fun

Might even print u worksheets and stuff and leaves nice notes on them when he gives them to u like every chapter has another ‘u can do it’ of ‘ur already here?! Omg! Ur far ahead keep going!’ And lots of smiley faces and hearts in the margins

He is not above helping u cheat. He will give u answers in school, risking being caught nd getting in trouble, like he’ll find a way to sit as close to u as possible in class and “drop” his pen besides u that just happens to have a paper inside with all of the answers!!!!

And when you see it you’re so happy and you look at him and wink trying it be inconspicuous and it’s so obvious and he’s like omg (y/n) pls… but he’s happy ur happy and ur grades improve so much bc he gets every answer right and so of course you are getting them right too

But u both plan on u getting a few wrong to avoid suspicion and he’s so happy when ur happy bc ur grades improve so he’ll start sending u the HW, too

Will send u just study notes if u don’t want to cheat and they r so good and he’ll also send u his flash cards and everything and lend u notes from the past

He knows ur YouTube username so if u start to study a lot more bc of ur parents’ scolding and watch his streams to “study” w him despite the million viewers it’s like it’s just u nd him and when u comment like “here bc my parents yelled @ me and now im trying to improve my grades” he is simultaneously v happy ur there but also heart broken

If it’s mainly ur parents scolding u ur upset about, he’ll listen to u talk about it for hours on end over text, FaceTime, call, etc.

Makes a joke ab sending ur parents to the nursing home he volunteers at to cheer u up 😭😭 it either makes u son harder or laugh

Overall, he cares LOTS about grades, but his not urs. And if ur worried ab getting a job he’s like dw I’ll cover u in the future :)) and he’s very understanding bc he’s in a very similar situation and hates seeing u suffer like that or go thru that even if it’s genuinely not that bad. If u cry his works just SHATTERS and he’ll listen to u rant and cry for hours on end. And if ur grades were actually considerably bad, he won’t tell u that, and he’ll help u improve them bc THATS his solution to it and he’s good at helping u study. If ur not up to it he will help u cheat despite the danger of getting caught, so he can see u happy again :(( he’s rlly so sad ur going thru the same thing as him and will do anything to make it better. Won’t offer to fight ur parents but if need be he might rough one of them up if things escalate to really like mentally abusive-like proportions. But if it wasn’t that bad, he’ll just console u and help u to feel better no matter what !!

(Unedited)

I hope this came out well!! I’m so happy I’m getting how to fight requests tysm for that, <3 also it ended up kinda long and I lost my train of thought a few times but this felt like an emergency request and when I read those I like when they’re rlly long bc it distracts and comforts me. If it was one I hope ur okay and know u r more than ur grades!!!! ❤️❤️ ty for ur request :))

#Jiyeon Woo x reader #Seong Taehoon x reader #Jiyeon x reader #Taehoon x reader #How to fight x reader #Viral hit x reader #Taehun x reader #Seong Taehoon #Jiyeon Woo

390 notes · View notes

wonderlustlucas · 4 years

Text

jack pot ; part 3 - hwang hyunjin

⇢ prompt You know it’s bad when you’re high as a kite and he’s still on your mind. ⇢ pairing hwang hyunjin x female reader ⇢ word count 6.4k ⇢ genre fluff & angst (not heavy, just in a slow burn kind of way) ⇢ warnings (18+) drug use, a suggestive make out & the mention of a boner twice maybe ⇢ summary College is a matter of working hard and playing hard. It’s an opportunity to start fresh, to grow as an individual and to blossom with those you befriend. People come and people go, leaving their mark on your life and showing you all the parts of becoming an adult. Some, however, do more than leave their mark. Some take just as much as they give. Things become complicated once they take the entirety of your love because you outright offered it to them.—college!au ; stoner!au ; friends to lovers!au ⇢ a/n AAAAAAAA omg im so excited to post this, this by far is my fav part of jack pot & i cant wait to hear what u all think!!! sorry its a bit shorter than the other parts, & technically this is the *last* part, but there will be an epilogue where you will see how everything comes to be!!!! have fun reading!!! <3

⇠ part 2

five.

“Oh, fuck, he’s good,” Yeji gasps, shoving her phone into Maddie’s hands before faceplanting into the table.

“Are you H-T-T-P because I’m colon-slash-slash without you,” Maddie reads with a chuckle, thumbs hesitating over the keyboard. “Quick, YN, look up some pick-up lines.”

Closing the tab on the article you should be reading but has been long forgotten, you promptly do as you are told and open the first link from your search, Minho and Jisung leaning in to help. “There,” Jisung stops you, pointing to one, “’Are you a parking ticket? Because you have fine written all over you.’”

The table can’t help but burst into laughter at such a sentence. It’s stupid, but ever since Yeji and Kim Sunwoo began texting, their conversations have been full of tacky puns and emoji-filled compliments.

“Damn,” Maddie whistles, setting the phone back into Yeji’s limp hand, “he’s already typing back.”

“Gross,” Ryujin teases, busy typing away on her laptop. How she manages to multitask so well is a skill you certainly lack. “Why don’t you just like, I don’t know, ask him out?” Jisung asks and when you glance up, he’s looking at you. “Because that’s the guy’s job,” Maddie quickly saves the day, winking to you when you send her a grateful smile.

“Bullshit,” Jeongin scoffs. Everyone, even Ryujin, stops to look at him.

Did he just curse?

“I mean, like,” he stammers, cheeks turning rosy at all the attention, “it’s 2020. Guys have insecurities, too.”

“I agree,” Minho hums, looking to Maddie with hearts in his eyes, “that kind of confidence is enough to make any boy fall in love.”

“Yeah, but—”

Lia rebuts, but your attention quickly falls elsewhere when a text message first appears on your laptop, then your phone.

hwang hyunjin🦔🕺🏻💞🧻 [now] Where r u rn?

Unable to fight your smile, you quickly type back.

[3:39 PM] YN: outside hollin st café [3:39 PM] YN: why? :)

“Have you seen their new house, YN?” Minho asks, prompting you to click your phone off and set it back on the table. “Whose house?”

“Changbin’s parents.”

“Oh,” shaking your head, you distantly curse Chan for keeping your friend busy today. Unlike Jisung, Changbin likes to write lyrics and do whatever other music stuff during the day at a normal time instead of the middle of the fucking night while stoned and trying to finish his computer science assignments at the same time. “No, he forgot to send me pictures.”

“Dude,” Jisung sighs dreamily, “it’s huge. So nice. I think the front door alone could cover tuition.”

“Is it really that nice?” Maddie asks in awe.

“He started to show me pics the other day but couldn’t finish but the kitchen… unnecessary,” Ryujin quips, pausing her work to check her phone. “Yeah, it’s insane. The whole place is unnecessary but the kitchen is like, a house in itself,” Jeongin hums, head shaking in disbelief.

“Damn, now I really want to see it,” you sigh, making a mental note to hunt Changbin down so he can show you. “It’s like Hyunjin and his rings,” Minho snickers, “he has so many. Whenever we’re out, if he sees a ring, boom. It’s his.”

Well, he’s not wrong but… You bite your tongue no matter how badly you wish to defend Hyunjin and his affinity for rings and jewelry in general. The boy has taste, what can you say? You certainly are not complaining about Hyunjin’s long fingers and the way he chooses to decorate them.

“I never thought I’d hear Changbin’s parent’s kitchen be analogous to Hyunjin’s jewelry collection, yet here we are,” Maddie chuckles, leaning over Yeji to peek at her conversation with Sunwoo.

“Wow, speak of the devil,” Jisung pipes up of course as soon as you have reopened the tab to your assignment. Changbin or Hyunjin, you don’t know, head whipping up to find out and a peculiar mix of relief and panic settling over you once you spot the latter. “Uh oh, YN’s gonna go into cardiac arrest.”

As subtly as you can, you elbow Jisung in the stomach and smile at Hyunjin as he nears. “Hey,” keeping his eyes on you, Hyunjin approaches your table and stops behind Maddie opposite from you, “I’m sorry, I should have asked if you were busy.” His cheeks, already flushed, burn pinker once he looks away to smile weakly at everyone else.

“I’m not busy!” You squeak, scrambling to close your laptop and shove it in your bag. “Are you sure? I can come back later?” He offers, tilting his head and this is when you realize he is holding a bubble tea in each hand. And from the looks of it, one seems to be your usual order. “No, she’s not,” Jeongin answers for you, recognizing your stupefied expression.

“I was just – yeah. No,” rushing to stand and swing your legs out around the bench, you nearly fall flat on your face, “I wasn’t doing anything, actually.” Steadying yourself with a hand on Minho’s shoulder, you heave a labored breath before carefully walking to meet Hyunjin.

“Okay,” he beams, either oblivious to how flustered you are or simply choosing to ignore it. Turning to wave to your friends, he hands you one of the cups and you realize it is, in fact, your favorite boba. Oh boy. “See ya later,” you wave to them as well, nose wrinkling when both Jisung and Maddie wink in return.

Following after Hyunjin, you finally allow yourself to take notice of his attire and can’t help but feel confused. He looks good. And not in the good attractive way—he always looks good. But good as in formal. It’s four o’clock on a Tuesday in October and he’s out here looking as if he just got out of a business meeting. White button-down tucked into fitted black slacks, dress shoes, black tie, and he even has a black suit jacket draped over his arm. His hair is styled, too; ever since he dyed it back to black, he’s been growing it out long enough for his bangs to cover his eyes. Now, however, it’s parted down the middle and seems as if he’s ever so slightly curled it away from his face.

Suddenly, you feel ridiculous walking beside him in mom jeans and a baggy sweatshirt from high school.

“Thanks for the boba,” you mumble around your straw, brain still preoccupied trying to get over how utterly handsome he is. “Why do you look so fancy?”

The side of his mouth twitches up at your words, but his eyes stay glued to the sidewalk as you continue to your unknown destination. “I had an audition,” Hyunjin admits, voice devoid of emotion as if it’s not important at all. “An audition?” You echo. “Why do you sound so not super mega excited? How did it go? What was it for?”

“Well—”

“Wait!” You interrupt, stopping your walk once you realize he had an audition and you didn’t know. “You had an audition? What – why didn’t you tell me?”

Hyunjin frowns, avoiding your gaze and dragging his bottom teeth over his top lip. “I didn’t tell anyone,” he finally says before reaching for your hand and tugging you away from the walkway and into your campus’ main courtyard. “Why? Is it some sort of secret or something, Hyunjin?” You scoff, sounding way more annoyed than you intended. But you are annoyed; why didn’t he want to tell anyone?

“No,” he sighs, finding an empty area in the grass and lowering himself to sit, “I just… didn’t want anyone to know. Didn’t want to make it a big deal.”

“Hyunjin,” you sigh, visibly softening for him and settling down next to him, crisscrossing your legs, “it is a big deal. I don’t know what it’s for, but if it’s important enough for you to audition, then it’s important to us, too. You don’t need to be humble twenty-four-seven, you know. I’m sure you could have used our support.”

“I didn’t get it, though,” Hyunjin whispers, “they just – I didn’t get in. I wasn’t good enough.” Sensing the sadness in his voice, you find a lump forming in your throat when you notice the way his bottom lip trembles. “Hey,” panicking, you set your boba down and sit up on your knees to wrap your arms around him, cradling his head into your chest once tears start falling, “no. Don’t ever say you’re not good enough, Hyunjin.”

“But if I did better, practiced more, than I would—"

“Stop,” you hush, combing your fingers through his hair and brushing strands away from his eyes, “I’ve never met someone who works as hard as you do. You can’t beat yourself up over this. Everything happens for a reason. You don’t know what could have happened if you got in. You could have hurt yourself eventually, or maybe met someone who’s a real asshole.”

“Yeah,” is all he says, quiet and muffled when he turns to press his forehead into your sternum, body still trembling as he lets out all his tears. You stay like that for a while, holding him against you and soothing a hand up and down his back until his sniffling falls quiet. “Listen,” you finally sigh, grabbing him by the shoulders and pulling him back. Your heart sinks once you take in the wet trails down his cheeks and the puffiness of his eyes. “Forget about it. Was it something for dance?”

When he nods subtly, you cup his face in your hands and swipe his cheeks with your thumbs. “You are an amazing dancer, Hyunjin. You can’t let this get to your head. And I don’t want you working your ass off more than you do already. Practice makes perfect, sure, but you need to rest. What about the idea Changbin came up with?”

“The YouTube thing?”

“Yes! Filming dance tutorials or just posting your routines is a really good idea,” you remind him, wiping your hands on your jeans once he falls back onto the grass with a gentle thud, hair flaying around him like a halo. Your limbs twitch with the urge to lie beside him, maybe throw an arm around him and rest your cheek on his chest, fingers tracing the soft features of his face, stroking through his hair and reminding him just how innately perfect he is, inside and out. You, of course, resist such a temptation, flopping down beside him and staring up at the clouds with a heavy heart.

“I could do that. Maybe,” Hyunjin huffs. Tilting your head to look at him, you find yourself knee-deep in that familiar longing feeling, pausing simply to appreciate how pretty he is in the evening sun, cheeks rosy from crying and hair begging to be touched. Shaking your head to rid such daydreams, you remind yourself how fragile his emotions are right now. Now is no time to get caught up on a fantasy. Reaching for your tea, you lean up on an elbow and redirect your gaze to the trees, the promise of winter having turned what was green burnt sienna and butterscotch, leaving trees barren and branches swaying gently in the crisp breeze that leaves you curling into yourself. “You should,” you hum, distant, mind clawing to come up with the words you want to say.

“Come here,” Hyunjin says now, voice stronger than before and when his hand wraps gently around your wrist, you can’t find it in yourself to resist. Allowing him to pull you back down beside him, you curl into his side, resting your head a safe distance away from his own and onto the curve of his arm. “Thank you for being so good to me,” he expresses. You squeeze your eyes shut when the arm you lie on wraps around your shoulders and pulls you substantially closer. “I need to tell you something.”

A long stretch of silence falls upon you and for a moment, you are unsure the words even left your mouth. What are you thinking?

“Wait! I have something first,” Hyunjin sighs, missing the way your breath hitches. “Okay,” you whisper, fiddling with one of the buttons on his shirt and focusing all your attention there.

“I just – I think… I owe you an apology,” he finally says, “I need to apologize for something that I did a while ago that I know probably hurt.” Your chest tightens. There’s a lot that has hurt you when it comes to Hyunjin, but none that he’s done purposely. None that are his fault. None that he should be apologizing for.

“I feel like we came to some mutual understanding to not mention what happened when we were freshmen, but it kills me to know that – that something happened, and we never talked about it,” Hyunjin starts, grip tightening on your shoulder and suddenly, you think you are dreaming. This cannot possibly be real. “I know it was awkward but, I also know me and Yiren dating was… ah. I don’t know.”

When he falls silent, you are unsure of what to say or do. You have no idea what the end goal of this conversation is. Hardly a minute ago, your heart and your brain decided it was time to tell him. Now, you’re not so sure you can do that until he finishes, and you are not about to give him your two cents if his reasoning for bringing it up is not the same as yours.

“I just want to apologize for not being brave enough to talk to you about it. I know I was confused, but I’m sure it was worse for you when they told you about her,” Hyunjin continues, sensing your rendered silence, “and it’s been so long since that happened, and now, you’re one of my closest friends.” Ouch.

“But I’ve been thinking,” when he picks up again, your eyes fly open in a panic. He’s been thinking. Hyunjinhas been thinking. You think you are going to pass out. “And I just feel like we… me and you, I mean—"

The standard iPhone alarm blares from beside you, promptly cutting him off and you think it is the biggest cockblock known to man. “Shit,” he hisses, leaning up to tug his phone from his pocket and in the process nudging you from your comfortable position. Sitting back up, nerves aflame and heart racing, your brows shoot up in confusion when all he does is stare at the number calling him. “What are you doing?”

“It’s the studio I was just at,” he scoffs in disbelief, barely glancing at you before looking back to his phone. You have never wanted to shrivel up and die as much as you want to right now. “Well? Aren’t you going to answer?”

Hyunjin makes a noise of acknowledgement before tapping the green icon and bringing the phone to his ear. “Hello?”

Sitting quietly beside him, you watch with a forced smile as his hummed responses and subtle nods morph into enthusiastic laughs and wide, beaming smiles. Hyunjin notices your confusion when you tilt your head, mouthing a ‘What?’ to him.

“They made a mistake,” he whispers, covering the speaker of his phone, “read off the wrong Hwang. I’m in.” When he grins excitedly at you, your response isn’t as cheerful as it could be. As it should be. “Yay!” You whisper, clapping gently but quickly turning to your boba when the other line begins speaking again. Looking away, you take a hefty sip, nearly choke on a tapioca ball, and build the walls around your heart up all over again in a matter of seconds.

“I’ve gotta go,” whispering, you manage one more pained smile before getting to your feet and wiping your butt of any possible grass stains, “good luck!” When he shines you one more breathtaking smile and waves excitedly, you hastily head in the other direction, wrapping your arms around yourself and swallowing past the lump that threatens to form the farther you walk.

It must be nice, you think, frantically wiping at your waterline. Must be nice to put yourself out there and have things work out the way you want them to. Must be nice being told you’re ‘in,’ you’re wanted, you’re desired.

It must be nice.

six.

Pick up food, you said. Ask Jisung, you said.

Your conscience is a big fat oompa loompa ass bitch. You would have never called Jisung to ask him if he wanted anything from Taco Bell if you knew he was with Changbin. And not just Changbin, you realized four minutes into your call; Seungmin and Hyunjin, too. Apparently he went over their place to record, or something, and didn’t care to let you know. Not that you’re his mom and he has too—but it would have been nice, and would have saved you from spending almost fifty dollars at Taco Bell.

“I tried calling Jisung but he didn’t answer,” you snap once Seungmin answers your call with a muffled hello. “Can one of you please come out and help me carry this in?” You glance at the five large sodas and two bags full of food in your passenger seat with a grimace. “Sure,” he agrees and you make a mental note for the umpteenth time just how much you love Seungmin, “I’ll be out in a sec.”

True to his word, you spot him making his way out of their apartment and across the small courtyard to meet you by your car not even a minute later, hauling each bag under his arms. “Thank you,” left only with the cupholder, you hurriedly lock your car and follow after him. “No problem. Thanks for being our Uber Eats,” then, pursing his lips, “how much was this?”

“Forty-seven something,” you grumble unhappily, knowing this was a big hit to your debit. “We’ll pay you back, don’t worry,” Seungmin smiles, leading you up the final flight of stairs and kicking open the ajar door.

Immediately, you’re hit with the smell.

“Dear, fucking hell,” making a face, you rub your nose to keep from sneezing, “it reeks in here. How have you guys not been kicked out yet?”

The stench of weed generally does not bother you anymore, but still—they could light a candle, or something. Seungmin shrugs, setting the bags down on the kitchen counter. “Luck, I guess.”

“IS THAT YN?” From another room, you hear Changbin shout, followed by an excited shriek from Jisung. “They’re high. Very high. You’ve been warned,” Seungmin whispers just as tweedle dee and tweedle dum themselves come flying around the corner. “YN!” Jisung grins, engulfing you in a dramatic hug. “Watch,” you hiss, regarding the blunt held between his fingers that comes dangerously close to your hair.

“Sorry,” he smiles, then, without warning, sticks the thing right between your lips. “I didn’t even offer.” Well, when life gives you lemons…

You hesitantly take the hit and blow the smoke away from him. You weren’t planning on getting high today, but here you are. “Thanks,” shaking your head as if that will clear it, you turn to Changbin and snugly wrap your arms around him. Every day you thank the heavens that he is a chill, calm high, unlike your maniac of a roommate.

“Thanks for the food,” fishing into his pockets and pulling out a crumpled ten-dollar bill, he slaps it into your palm. You only hum in reply, shoving it into your own pocket and praying you don’t lose it before you remember to put it in your wallet. “Where’s Hyunjin?” You ask, no longer caring about being slick.

“In his room,” Seungmin answers, rummaging through the bags to find what he ordered. Then, “HYUNJIN!” You jump, reaching for your soda and standing away from the other three until they have claimed whatever belongs to them. No sooner than Seungmin calls for him, you hear a door being cracked open and out comes Hyunjin.

He looks extremely disheveled. Like, just woke up from a two-month hibernation, disheveled. In the blink of an eye, however, he rakes a hand through long blonde hair and promptly sets a baseball cap backwards to keep the strands away and suddenly, he doesn’t look so disheveled anymore. You force yourself to look away, cursing the way your gut twists.

“Gimme my crunchwrap,” you say around your straw, snatching the blunt from Jisung’s fingers and moving around him to fetch your dinner. He doesn’t even protest.

He knows you need it more than he does.

“That’s a lot of food,” Hyunjin says once he has finally entered the kitchen, voice groggy and eyes puffy from sleep. Or from being high, you can’t tell. Pressing his chest to your back, he wraps one arm around you to keep you against him while the other reaches into a bag to take what’s his. Swallowing past the desert dryness of your throat, you manage a thick inhale from the blunt before tilting your head to look at him and mentally thanking the other three for taking it as their cue to head out.

“Not my fault you guys eat like animals,” you chuckle shakily, trying to ignore the firmness of his body against yours, veins prominent on the arm that holds you against him and the ripple of muscle along his abdomen noticeable even through his shirt and yours. Dear god, it is too early for this. Not even seven o’clock and you are already drooling in more places than one.

Hyunjin pouts as if it is not true. “How much do I owe you?” He asks, finally moving away to grab his drink and you can’t help your disappointment, quickly finishing the blunt before tapping it out into one of the many ashtrays. “Don’t worry about it,” you wave off, digging through their drawers for a paper plate.

“YN,” Hyunjin deadpans, regarding you with a raised brow once you come up and begin unwrapping your food. You refuse to look him in the eye. “What do I owe you?” He repeats, firmer this time and it sends a chill down your spine when it most certainly should not. Sighing, you retrieve the receipt from your pocket and count everything he got. “Thirteen.”

Humming in content, Hyunjin reaches for his wallet on the counter and pulls a ten and five out. “There,” he beams, tucking the bills into your pocket himself. Rolling your eyes, you pray he does not notice how you flush and hurry out of the kitchen to join Seungmin on the sofa.

“House Hunters?” You ask with a laugh, looking at the TV once you have settled next to him. “I told you HGTV is the best.”

Seungmin hums in agreement. “I thought it was stupid at first, but Hyunjin was watching Fixer Upper and I got addicted,” he says, nodding to the older boy doing a little dance in the kitchen as he eats one of his tacos. Your heart does somersaults at the sight. “They’re all so good,” you agree after taking a few bites of your own food, eyes trained on the television, “House Hunters is a classic, though.”

“I like the international one,” Hyunjin adds on his way over, crashing unceremoniously next to you. Out of the corner of your eye, you notice Seungmin wrinkle his nose when Hyunjin sets his free hand casually on your thigh. “Shh,” he grumbles, vaguely gesturing to the screen and chewing a mouthful of food, “I wanna hear what the house has.”

One episode turns to two, which turns to three, which turns to four, and suddenly you have been watching House Hunters with Seungmin and Hyunjin for almost three hours. It definitely is the weed, always making time perpetually slower, and it did not help when Jisung and Changbin reappeared sometime during your binge with one of Felix’s bongs. Not necessarily how you intended to spend your precious Friday night, but there is no sense in complaining when you are with your buddies and Hyunjin, of course.

Taco Bell long gone, you watch with blurry eyes when Hyunjin gets up from his slumped position against you to head into the kitchen and open the freezer. This, as well as the realization that House Hunters has ended and gone to some other, not-as-cool show, brings both you and Seungmin somewhat back to reality.

“It’s almost ten,” Seungmin announces, staring dazedly at the time on his phone. You hum in acknowledgment, certainly sober enough to reply but simply too lazy to. “I think I’m going to bed. Or play something. Don’t wreck the place,” he sighs, dragging a hand down his face before standing up. “G’night, Minnie,” you smile, watching with a furrowed brow as he continues down the hall and into his room. It isn’t until you hear his door click shut does the weight of being alone with Hyunjin settle on your chest.

It’s not like you haven’t spent time alone with Hyunjin before. In fact, that usually is the way it’s been in the past three years; whether the two of you decided to do your own thing or the rest of your friends eventually left or went to bed, you are used to this feeling. Used to ignoring the butterflies in your gut when he does something particularly cute and used to tampering down the mental images you conjure up knowing it’s just you and him.

But that doesn’t make things any easier. No matter how hard you try, you simply can’t help but feel this way around Hyunjin, especially when you’re alone. That’s just the way the cookie crumbles.

“Whatcha wanna watch?” Hyunjin asks around one last spoonful of ice cream before setting the pint back into the freezer. “Uhh…” You drone, blinking heavily at the TV and back to him as he makes his way back over. “I dunno, I’m sure you’ve been watching some drama. You can put that on.”

“You sure?” He asks with a raised brow, collapsing next to you and slumping dramatically halfway down the cushions. “Yes,” laughing, you find yourself reaching out to tuck messy strands of hair back behind his ear without hesitation, “also, why are you wearing a hat inside?”

Hyunjin pauses, straining to look up as if he will be able to see the back of his cap against his forehead. “I’m wearing a hat?”

“Yes, you idiot,” in comes the endless weed giggles and you find yourself unable to stop laughing, watching with teary eyes as he sits up and takes his hat off. “I don’t remember putting this on,” he chuckles airily, flipping the cap back and forth in his hands before tossing it onto the coffee table. “Should I cut it?”

“No!” You shout a little too quickly and a little too loudly. Shrinking against the arm of the couch, you ignore his amused smile and look to his long hair, freshly bleached strands falling down to his neck and shorter pieces brushing against his cheeks. Fuck, it should be illegal to look this good. “I like it long. It really suits you.”

“It’s annoying,” Hyunjin grins despite his complaint, lifting his legs onto the couch and flopping onto his side, head now resting on your lap. “I don’t know what to do with it.”

Now that he’s offered playing with his hair on a silver platter, you don’t hesitate combing your fingers through it, tugging out pieces stuck under his head and brushing it out completely. “You could pull the sides back,” you hum distantly, separating a section of hair near his temple to pull back, “or make a bun with what you can. You just have to play around with it.”

Humming in agreement, Hyunjin resituates himself after reaching for the remote and switching to Netflix. When you go back to simply raking your fingers from root to tip in irregular directions, you don’t miss the way his eyelids flutter at the motion and make sure to pay extra attention to his scalp. When this turned into a head massage, you’re not entirely sure.

The drama Hyunjin puts on is unbearable. You stopped paying attention a while ago, focusing more on him and how he seems to enjoy it, fingers busy braiding random sections of hair, taking them out, and then braiding them again. With two finally done the way you want them to, you are midway through the third when your fingers begin to cramp up.

“Why’d you stop?” Hyunjin asks seconds after you drop the braid and stretch your fingers out. “Fingers are cramping,” chuckling at the disappointed pout of his lips, you crack what knuckles you can before going back and undoing the unfinished braid. “Oh,” he mutters, cheek still pressed against your leg, “feels good.”

Humming in response, you ignore the way his words make your heart swell and begin gathering all his hair into a ponytail, pressing the braids to lay flat and finally tying it with a hair tie once you have combed up all that you can. Immediately, his bangs and hairs closer to the nape of his neck fall out, leaving the ponytail spikey and messy. At least the braids look good. You can’t help but giggle.

“What?” Hyunjin asks, pausing his show and leaning up. “What’d you do?”

“Go see for yourself,” pointing to the bathroom, you comb out a looped piece of hair before he stands to do just that. His ponytail bobs the entire walk there.

When he reaches the door and flips the light on, you watch from your position as he checks himself out, brushing away his bangs and flicking the pony. You frown when he accidentally yanks at a braid.

“Come here,” you say, sitting up, “you messed up the braid.”

“Honestly,” Hyunjin considers his reflection one last time before skipping his way over, “it doesn’t look half bad.” Expecting him to sit back next to you, your pulse quickens when he anchors a hand to the armrest and leans in front you, only inches away from your face. “No, definitely,” you say once you have gotten over the shock of him being so close so suddenly, “I like it in the ponytail. You’d really impress the girls if you braided your hair yourself.” Reaching up to tuck hair back into the braid and press it down flat once more, you don’t miss the way his brows draw together and lips twitch down. “What?”

Time ceases to exist as Hyunjin begins to come closer. In reality, you know it simply is a matter of seconds, but all of space and time seems to still once he leans forward. It feels as if an eternity goes by, allowing you to count each individual eyelash, memorize the details of his skin, take note of the smoothed lines on his plump lips. The way time slows is cruel; it allows panic to set in, the realization that he most certainly is looming over you with his eyes on your lips sending a spark of excitement and anxiety through your veins.

And then, just as this realization and this panic has set your nerves aflame, a gentle hand comes to cradle your jaw before Hyunjin’s lips press against yours.

It is so easy to surrender to the taste and touch of him. Instantly, an eruption of emotions and thoughts spiraling out of control fills you, yet your brain focuses only on Hyunjin, Hyunjin, Hyunjin. This is not the first time you have kissed him, nor the first time simply having him so close, but the feeling that radiates from your heart outward is unlike anything you have felt before. This is uncalled for. This is not like two years ago. You were not expecting this.

Hyunjin sighs into the kiss when you lean up to loop your arms around his neck. No sooner have you done this, he breaks away to sit beside you once more, hands reaching for your waist and guiding you to sit over his lap.

You could kiss him all day, you think, palms lying flat by his collarbones before fisting the material of his shirt when his tongue prods at the seam of your lips. Blood seemingly coming to a boil and nerves sparking dangerously, you find yourself quickly sobering up as the minutes tick by, completely and utterly addicted to him and this feeling, this feeling you have craved but never crossed the line for. And now, it’s yours to keep.

Forgetting the braids, you seize the opportunity to rake your fingers through his hair. Different, than how you did earlier. Desperate. Combing it away from his face once, twice, swallowing his groans when you tug at the roots, you realize with a whine that his hands have left your face in favor of dragging down your sides, circling back to squeeze at your breasts, rubbing at your thighs and finally sliding back to your ass, situating you more comfortably on his thighs.

When Hyunjin finally breaks the kiss to journey elsewhere, littering chaste kisses across your jaw, below your ear, down your neck, the weight of your actions finally hits you. It is overwhelming, the way you come spiraling back to reality, and you are not sure if the quiet moan that leaves you is due to the press of something else against your thigh or simply the realization that you are making out with Hyunjin.

You have to stop before you get hurt again.

“Hyunjin,” you gasp, shuddering when his soft lips brush against your jaw, “wait. We need to talk.”

He pauses at this, fingers digging into your sides and you feel his frown against your neck. “What’s there to talk about?” He murmurs, arms sliding around you and tugging you closer, prompting you to wrap your arms around his neck and hug him close and pretend like his boner isn’t digging into you.

It’s your turn to frown. “About us,” whispering, you lift one hand to stroke through his hair, “we need to talk about us.”

“I thought my feelings were very clear,” Hyunjin scoffs, all tenderness in his voice gone. Instinctively, you lean back, blinking at him in surprise. “Unless this is just another one of your games? Does this not mean anything to you, YN? I don’t think I could stomach you running off to Changbin or fucking Chan again.”

His words pierce your heart before you have even fully processed them, hurt flashing across your features and your body goes numb. “What?” Is all you can manage, scrambling to get away from him, chest heaving and eyes suddenly burning with the brine of tears. “What are you talking about, Hyunjin?”

“You know exactly what I’m talking about!” He shouts. You flinch, not from the way he raises his voice, but from the genuine sadness in his eyes. “The past three years have been a constant battle with you. We’re best friends, for fucks sake, I figured out a long time ago that you have feelings for me. Feelings more than best friends. Yet every fucking time we started moving in the right direction, you turned your back on me.”

You can do nothing but stand there and let the tears fall. All the words and bottled emotions you wish to say are right there on the tip of your tongue, but you simply cannot bring yourself to voice them. Not when he’s right. Not when you have turned your back on him time and time again.

And then, he hisses more to himself than you, “Is this just sloppy seconds? You never once thought about my feelings in all of this?”

The anger brewing within you suddenly bursts from the dam and hisses through your body like deadly poison. “Sloppy seconds?” You snarl, fists clenching. “Who the fuck do you think you are? Your feelings? You just said you know how I feel about you, so why didn’t you ever do anything about it? How was I supposed to know you felt the same?”

“I thought it was pretty fucking obvious,” Hyunjin spits back, gaze narrowing, “didn’t think I had to spell out the fact that I like you, YN. You’re a smart girl.”

“Do not treat me like a child,” clenching your jaw, you have to look away for a moment, pacing one, two, three steps, hands raking through your hair and wiping away the stream of tears from your cheeks. You have never been filled with such rage. Having finally reached its boiling point, it now consumes you whole, sweeping off in waves and destroying all boundaries. “Confessing is not an easy thing, as you apparentlyknow, so don’t make me seem like the only idiot here. But maybe I was wrong about you if you think of me as just sloppy seconds.”

“I never said that!” Hyunjin barks, standing up to grasp your wrist when you turn away to grab your keys. “Don’t put words in my mouth! I would never, never think of you that way. I just don’t understand why you never spoke up after all this time. I’ve been dying, YN, you have no clue how badly I have been—”

“Oh, believe me, I know,” you snap, yanking your arm away from him, “I told you, Hyunjin. Telling someone you love them isn’t as easy as learning to ride a bike. You’re right, I have turned my back on you. But not intentionally. I’ve been scared, I’m a pussy, whatever.” Biting your top lip as if it will stop the tears that continue to fall freely, you avoid looking at him and glance back to find not only Seungmin, but Jisung and Changbin, too, peeking out from their doors with eyes blown wide with shock. Once you have noticed them, however, they panic and scramble to get out of sight.

Sighing shakily, you look back to Hyunjin and cannot ignore the way your heart sinks at the sight of him. Even upset, he is beautiful. You wonder how much you will see him after this.

“You don’t have to tell me you like me back to make me feel better, Hyunjin,” bouncing on your heels, you suddenly feel exhausted, body and soul heavy with the words you not only spoke, but heard, too. “We can figure this out another day, but for now, I need to go home. I’ll see you.”

Turning away once more, you do not make it very close to the front door before he stops you once more. “Wait, YN,” Hyunjin huffs, smiling softly when he reaches for your hand and you do not pull away. Running his tongue over his lip, he seems to hesitate for a moment, trying to gather his thoughts.

“Did you mean it when you said you love me?”

⇢ epilogue

340 notes · View notes