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#pinch of salt
petermorwood · 29 days
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This is one of, if not THE, best April Fools jokes ever, and may even be the very first to air on "serious TV". The prank was aired April 1 1957 at the end of the BBC current-affairs programme “Panorama”.
It was helped by spaghetti being a rare exotic food in 1950s Britain, and narration by the hugely respected journalist and presenter Richard Dimbleby made it utterly convincing.
Afterwards people either got the joke - or didn’t, and wanted to grow their own spaghetti trees. These optimists were told to “place a length of dry spaghetti in a jar of tomato sauce and hope for the best”.
*****
The entire spoof got it wrong, of course, since free-range organic spaghetti doesn’t grow on trees at all. 
In actual fact it’s a kind of marshland reed, and very seasonal, only available from March 15 (when by tradition the first harvest is made by use of many small sharp knives) through until April 2nd, when it’s officially declared to be stale.
Extruded lengths of flour-water-egg paste - originally called spaghetti finti or spaghetti di casa - replicate these reeds while being available all year round.
*****
Some humourless pundits indulged in sputtering outrage that such nonsense was part of a serious programme, but "Panorama” producer David Wheeler stuck to his guns, suggesting that viewers needed a more critical attitude to what was shown on TV, and shouldn’t believe everything they saw. 
What would he have said now?
*****
@dduane​ says that for US readers to understand just how effective it was, imagine the same thing on “60 Minutes”, voiced with equal sincerity by Dan Rather.
*****
And oddly enough, what we’re having for supper tonight will be...
Probably not spaghetti.
;->
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darkmasterofcupcakes · 10 months
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So, apparently the creators have said that Drakken and Shego wouldn't be a long term relationship....And to that I invoke the Death of the Author and follow my belief that the only stuff that's definitely canon is what's in the show and the show ends with at the very least a heavy implication that they have a mutual thing for each other, even if it's not 100% clear if they're actually in a relationship.
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reshramlove1ob · 4 months
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I’m your emotional support frog
🧂👌🐸
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theyuniversity · 2 years
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For example,
Henry’s niece tends to exaggerate, so take whatever she says with a grain of salt.🧂
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Website | Twitter |  Instagram | Medium | Pinterest | Ko-fi | eBook
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superbeans89 · 1 year
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Getting Gen 3 vibes off these base stats (if true).
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banglakhobor · 9 months
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এক চিমটেতেই কেল্লাফতে! সংসারে সুখের অভাব হবে না, ঘরে শুধু রাখুন এই একটি জিনিস
পটনার বিখ্যাত বাস্তু বিশেষজ্ঞ এবং পরামর্শদাতা, কেপি সিং জানাচ্ছেন, লবণের উৎস হল সমুদ্র। অমাবস্যার সময় সমুদ্রে জলস্ফীতি হয়। এই সময় যাঁদের আগে থেকেই কোনও মানসিক সমস্যা রয়েছে, তাঁদের সমস্যা আরও বেড়ে যেতে পারে। লবণের শক্তি প্রাচুর্যের কারণে এমন ঘটে থাকে। Source link
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scarletrigmor · 10 days
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So long story short it was greed and homophobia
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fauna-and-floraa · 5 months
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Seungmin for Nylon Japan x Coach. English translations under the cut.
To Bangchan hyung, thank you for your hard work this year. I look forward to working with you again next year. Take care of yourself! Grandpa. A reliable leader, Bang Chan. A black leather tote with excellent storage capacity that can be used from work to work. The eye-catching robot print that stands out against the simple design subtly shows off your sense of style.
To Lee Know Hyung, I hope you have a merry Christmas- Nekohyung! (cat hyung) For our beloved Lee Know, we have selected a sweater that is soft to the touch and adds warmth to your face. Pay attention to the sophisticated and colorful color scheme that adds this year's color to autumn/winter styles that tend to be heavy.
To Seo Changbin hyung, thank you for your hard work this year. Please train hard next year too! Changbin subtly show off your gratitude with a combination of a mini wallet for everyday use and high-quality knitwear. The key point is the colorful and profound prints that tickle the playful spirit of adults.
To Hyunjin-kun, I hope you have a happy Christmas, which is your favorite~ Hyunjin, who has an artistic side, chose a crossbody bag from the “Cosmic” collection with a pop of planets. Pair it with a down jacket for a casual look.
To Han, eat lots of your favorite cheesecake this Christmas! For the fashion-loving HAN, we are gifting a highly designed crossbody bag with a traditional signature coated canvas and catchy handwriting motif patches. Combine with knit for a traditional mood.
To Felix tingling, Have a nice Christmas! Thank you for your hard work this year!! Picking up a Kira Kirakira Chio mini bag with the aim of turning it into a ball, the stylish presence will update your outfit toNaramachi mode.'' To I.N-kun, our maknae, thank you for being cute this year too! I hope you stay cute next year too~ To our beloved youngest member I.N COACH's icon character "Lexy" A combination of pop printed tote and playful jacquard knit.
To Stay, Happy New Year! Seungmin. For STAY, which is always in your heart, we chose a retro mini bag that you can carry with you at any time. The size fits a smartphone, making it perfect for accompanying live performances. We recommend using it not only as a shoulder bag but also as a clutch.
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the-modern-typewriter · 6 months
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hey I'm so sorry if this is is an unwanted request, but I wanted to ask for a hero x villain story where the villain kidnaps? And tattoos the hero. I think it would be very fun and dramatic. A very permanent and painful reminder.
I really love your work, I've read pieces of your writing for years. Keep doing what you're doing <3
"Hold still, or it's going to be wobbly," the villain said. "Nobody wants a wobbly tattoo, do they? That's just lame."
The hero snarled at them, wordless, unable to do much more with the bit wedged in their mouth. It was, according to the villain, to stop the hero from biting through their own tongue. So, that was nice and reassuring.
They could struggle, but not enough to stop what was going to happen. The grip the villain's various lackeys had on them was too firm and unforgiving. Still - the presence of hands, instead of cold metal, tried to trick some part of their lizard brain into thinking they had a real chance of escape if they just tried hard enough.
They didn't. They knew they didn't. But they struggled all the same, eyes flashing, breath ragged. They'd been forced onto their back on something that looked a little like a dentist's chair, head pinned sideways to face the villain. They only had vague impressions of the rest of the room. Bright light.
The villain had pulled up a chair next to them with their kit.
"So," the villain said, in an affable sort of voice. "It's going to hurt a little, like we talked about. That's mainly because of the location." They began their work, carefully, and the hero squeezed their eyes shut. A whimper escaped them. It was not a little. "Ribs don't have a lot of fat, you see, and you're quite sensitive anyway. But you said that's where you'd get one, so, far be it from me to dictate."
The hero had said hypothetically they would get a tattoo on their ribs. Because it looked cool. They hadn't done any research and they certainly hadn't been serious about it. It had merely been idle conversation with someone they'd thought was their friend.
They'd also said that they would get a jellyfish, or maybe a small bird.
The hero tried to see what the hell the villain was doing, but they couldn't get a good look beyond the distressingly elegant curve of the villain's head.
"I figured you'd want to be conscious, though." The villain laughed, softly. "I wouldn't want to wake up and find out someone had just done something to me, you know? Makes it hard to process it. Freaky."
The hero swore at them. They liked to think the sentiment got through, even if it was just raw sound. Choked.
"You'll look so gorgeous when you're done, though," the villain said. "Don't worry. I'm a professional. I've done this loads of times before."
The hero knew that. That was the problem.
The villain's super-abilities were unusual enough that it had taken the hero far too long to realise that the villain had any, and that they were in fact a monstrosity rather than simply the sexy artist that the hero had met in a bar. Whatever the villain painted, wrote, inked or drew was woven through with their power. It could come alive. It could influence. It could harm or heal that specific area at the villain's whim.
It could, in short, do all manner of things that the hero did not want permanently etched into their skin.
Everyone close to the villain had a tattoo. It didn't bode well.
"Just breathe," the villain said. "You're doing so well. It will be easier on you if you relax."
The hero swore at them again. It didn't make them feel better.
The villain worked on them for what felt like hours. If it was a jellyfish, it was a truly massive jellyfish that curved all the way up their side. The hero still hadn't got a good look. At some point, they'd stopped writhing in the chair, exhausted.
They felt dazed when the villain finally lifted their head, meeting their eyes again. The villain brushed a tear away from the hero's cheek. It reminded the hero to jolt again, but the hands on them remained as relentless as ever.
Another small, involuntary sound left them.
Their skin felt hot. Sunburnt.
"All done," the villain said. They finally eased the bit out of the hero's mouth. "You should have some water. Are you going to drink it nicely?"
"What the hell did you do to me?" the hero demanded. Their voice was raspy.
"It's gorgeous. You'll love it. Water?"
"I don't want anything from you!"
"Good skin is important to good tattoos. But, hey." The villain shrugged. "I can't make you." They gestured for their lackeys to release the hero.
The hero surged up in an instant, fist already flying towards the villain's face. In an instant, their body froze, knuckles inches from the villain's face. It didn't matter how much they strained. They couldn't move.
The villain raised an eyebrow. "You'll want to make sure to keep it clean, to avoid any infection," the villain said. "And don't pick at it, okay? Stay out of the sun. No swimming."
"What did you do to me!?" It came out through gritted teeth.
The villain smirked at them. "I gave you a jellyfish. On the house. You're welcome."
The hero glared.
"That's what you wanted, right?" the villain asked.
"I didn't want this."
The villain shrugged. "I did, though. For the moment I saw you with your clothes off"
"You-" Words didn't feel enough to express the emotion that coursed through the hero at that. "I hate you."
"Yes, I get that quite a lot. I don't generally let it bother me. You do all look so pretty fuming, helpless, at my mercy."
The hero swallowed.
The villain waved a hand, and whatever strange paralysis had overtaken the hero, vanished. They staggered forward, nearly pitching into the villain's lap. The villain caught them to steady them, hands on their waist.
It should have been excruciating, to have the villain's hand on the tattoo, but instead there was a buzz of pleasure across the hero's skin that definitely wasn't normal. They wrenched back as quickly as possible, heart pounding.
Their fists curled, itching with the urge the punch again, but they didn't quite dare get close.
The villain beamed at them, eyes glittering with mirth, apparently knowing exactly what the hero was thinking.
"Now," they said. "Do you want a lift home? Or do you prefer to take a moment to recover here?"
"You're sick."
"I'm up and coming, darling. One day you'll thank me for it."
The hero peeled the bandage off the moment they were at home, alone, to try and get a good look at their new acquisition.
It was a jellyfish, just as the villain had said, inked in full colour and in exquisite detail and artistry. It seeped blue and purple into the hero's skin, with the smallest tinges of shimmering pink. The villain's initials were weaved into the jellyfish's umbrella, subtle to someone not looking for them. Small but there.
The hero didn't remember hitting the bathroom floor, only the dull feeling of their knees giving way beneath them as it all well and truly sunk in.
They could feel it against them. It was almost as if the tentacles were moving, gently, caressing their ribs. As if the villain's fingers were there, a ghost of a blazing touch.
They got a horrific amount of compliments about the damn thing.
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petermorwood · 1 year
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In light of all the renewed interest about Martin Scorsese’s long-overlooked “Goncharov” (1973), has anyone noticed the element which repeats in his later and much better known film “Taxi Driver” (1976)?
It’s The Gun As Protagonist Accessory.
In “Goncharov” it’s right there on the poster, held by Robert de Niro: that’s a Thompson M1921 with 50-round drum magazine, the classic gangster gun, the Chicago Typewriter, the gun that made the Twenties roar.
This weapon has appeared in many gangster movies, most famously in the original “Scarface” (1932) where Tony Camonte (Paul Muni), encounters one for the first time when it’s used in a murder attempt against him and all but falls in love with the thing.
“When this gives orders, people listen!”
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In “Taxi Driver” it’s an enormous revolver, a Smith & Wesson M29 similar to the one carried by Dirty Harry, though here made even more imposing with an 8” barrel (Harry’s was only 6”).  Scorsese is making a visual comment about the way his anti-hero Travis Bickle (Robert de Niro again) compensates for perceived inadequacy.
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I’m not making any observations about trigger discipline. Really. No. I’m not.
Anyway, if Bickle could be associated with the clock motif in “Goncharov” the clock in question would be a cuckoo, so playing around indoors with this hand-cannon is no more than might be expected.
“You talkin’ to me...?”
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There’s even a piece on the soundtrack, accompanying the gun’s introduction, entitled “The .44 Magnum Is A Monster.” (YouTube link.)
Having said that, it’s worth noting that in the final confrontation – when Bickle proves himself a more than adequate hero by rescuing underage Iris (Jodie Foster) from her life of sex slavery – the huge revolver plays a less significant role than expected from the way it’s been set up. Bickle defeats his opponents with much smaller handguns and even cold steel in the form of a boot knife.
This hero has overcome his monster in more ways than one.  
The Thompson plays a much more prominent role in “Scarface” than in “Goncharov”. Rather than a villain’s perverse secondary love interest, there it’s built up as a necessary adjunct of brutal power, which then fades into the background of relationships presented (this was released in 1973 after all) as improper if not actually warped.
“Ice-Pick Joe” Morelli’s (John Cazales) preference for a penetrating weapon rather than a gun (also favoured by real-life mobster Abe “Kid Twist” Reles)...
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... is a pointer (sorry) at aspects of his character which couldn’t yet be stated clearly on-screen. What remains obvious through Scorsese’s direction and the excellent performances of his actors is that human failings are more destructive than any mere weapon.
It’s a masterful inversion of Chekov’s Gun, the premise where “a gun shown hung on the wall (for which read “any plot element given extra emphasis”) must be fired (used) before the performance ends”.
I haven’t been able to find actual screenshots from the film so these are representative images, but I hope they’ll show how, by utilising "Goncharov”’s recurrent clock motif to segue from Ambrosini (Al Pacino) winding one of his cherished antique timepieces...
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... to Lo Straniero (de Niro) winding the clockwork drive of his Thompson gun’s drum magazine (incidentally an action seldom seen in films)...
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...Scorsese manipulates his audience into believing that the film will culminate in a classic head-to-head gunfight.
That’s how Brian de Palma, a much less subtle director, ends his 1983 “Scarface” remake, with Tony Montana (Al Pacino) inviting his enemies to “Say hello to my little friend!”, the grenade-launcher attached to his automatic rifle.
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Though “Goncharov” does feature some firearms action (it’s a gangster film after all), Scorsese leaves most its guns on the wall as a distraction until his audience realises, as the movie’s climax approaches, that destructive violence can take place as quietly and irreversibly as the passage of time marked out by a ticking clock in a darkened room.
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I’m going to be fully blunt and say that I completely ignore the point in the DuckTales guidebook that says Hortense and Quackmore are still alive? Because I swear that almost everything in the actual show gives off the impression that they’re dead? And I feel like if they were still alive, they’d have been mentioned more in the present...Or made an appearance?
Honestly, having them still be alive in the present and just...off on a farm somewhere or something, just kind of makes it come across like they effectively abandoned their family, especially with the whole situation of Donald raising the boys alone after Della vanished and he left the mansion. 
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mokulule · 3 months
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A Pinch of Salt - Part 4
First | Masterpost
The final part of the first installment of the Salt in the Bones series which is a project co-created with @clockwayswrites, you can see the other stuff written for it in the masterpost link above or go to the first part.
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John looked at the kid, who just stepped inside the fucking binding circle. His mouth fell open in shock.
“What is wrong with you!?” It wasn’t so much a question as it was an exclamation, and John didn’t wait for any answer. “Of all the sodding, daft, goddamn tossers - what were you bloody thinking? No, you weren’t thinking. Otherwise you wouldn’t have fucking done that. You DO NOT go into the blasted circle!”
“Are you done?”
“Am I-“ John spluttered.
Are you done? He asked, as if John was the unreasonable one here! “Oh you’re right chuffed, aren’t you mate? Well, you cocked up, you’re about to be banished right alongside the storm, you little git!”
“Then stop the banishing or banish us both. It’s your choice.” Kid stood, back straight, jaw clenched stubbornly and a frown over those wide blue eyes. His hair and clothes whipped violently from the storm, but he didn’t care, just kept his eyes on John.
John raised his hands in frustration, words dying on his tongue. It would serve him right!
It would serve him right; he stepped into the bloody circle. It wasn’t John’s fault. Everything was going fine for once and maybe that should have been John’s warning. Whatever was up with the kid he apparently had a soft spot for ghosts - even after John had told him several times that the spirit was gone. It’d gone nova. No coming back. The end. It would continue it’s rampage until it burned out. It would hurt and destroy indiscriminately.
And yet he still-
It would serve him right to get sent to Hell alongside it. It wouldn’t even be the first time someone John worked with got sent to Hell for their trouble. John Constantine was bad luck for everyone around him. It happened.
But it was different when John held the reins of the spell that did it, when he had the choice to stop it.
Still John was at his wits end. If he stopped the banishing, the kid was still trapped in the circle with the spectral storm. If he broke the circle they were back at square one except they were in the center of the storm’s power and it was even angrier.
It was easier, safer, to just continue the banishing. Kid had made his stupid arse decision. John wasn’t a good person. He did what was necessary. Ends and means and all that.
But he was a bloody kid - a teenager - they were basically obligated to do stupid shit. Didn’t mean he deserved to get sent to Hell for it. John had seen and done a lot of shit, but when it came right down to it he didn’t want to add sending a kid to Hell.
John had seen enough dead kids to last him a lifetime.
“Oh bollocks.” John let his arms fall and cut the feed to the banishing spell, wincing slightly at the backlash. “You better have a plan kid.”
The kid had to have some sort of abilities with that aura, maybe all hope was not lost? The kid grimaced and John’s forced optimism crumbled like so much sand.
“I-“ the kid winced as something in the storm hit the back of his head. He rubbed the spot, and looked almost apologetic, “I figured I’d try talking to them.”
John stared.
And stared.
“Or-“ the kid backtracked, “just calm them down somehow?”
“You cannot ‘calm down’ a spectral storm!” John felt like a broken record on repeat. “It’s impossible.”
He threw up his hands and walked exactly three steps away counting his breaths all the while wracking his brain for a different solution. There weren’t any good ones. Heck it was a miracle the kid hadn’t already been torn to pieces being inside the circle.
“We’re dead,” he lamented dramatically.
“Half-dead.”
John’s head snapped around at the weird response.
“I mean,” the kid tried for a smile, “I’m the only one in the circle.”

John stared in despair. The kid’s sense of humor needed serious work.
“I’m not gonna leave you in the bloody circle, kid.”
Danny stood struck wide eyed at the admission. That was- He didn’t know how to deal with that. There was a pang in his chest. He felt too open, too vulnerable. He swallowed before finding his voice.
“Just let me try something, okay?”
Danny turned around to face the center of the storm, he instantly had to squeeze his eyes near shut, from all the dust. Instinctively he took a breath and coughed. Okay breathing not good. Too bad he was human right now.
He had to get closer, closer to that screaming grief. He might be human right now, but he was also a ghost and the anger from earlier was just a thin veneer on top of grief on top of a cry for help. He felt it in his core like scrabbling hands desperately looking for purchase.
He took a step forward, hands up to shield his face, pushing against the wind. Another step. Then another.
How was he gonna calm them down?
Danny didn’t know. He knew fighting. He’d even sometimes recently had luck with talking. But this? It was way beyond talking, until they were calm there would be no such thing. Danny didn’t know what to do. He could only press on and hope an idea came to him.
The grief was stronger the closer he got to the center, it tore into him. Tears trickled down his cheeks and turned into gunk from the dust. Something sharp cut into his bare arms. Danny frowned, kept his head down and pushed forward.
Another step and the grief sunk sharp claws into his core. He screamed clutching his chest and gasping for breath that would do nothing. But the claws were gone as soon as they’d come, retreated as if they’d touched fire.
“Are you alright kid?!”
Danny spared a quick glance back to Trenchcoat who stood all the way up to the edge of the circle, face white as if he’d seen a ghost. Danny couldn’t help smiling at that. Something that alarmed Trenchcoat even further.
“I’m breaking the circle.”
“Don’t,” Danny coughed clearing his throat.
Danny looked back up, squinting through the swirling dust. It may not be visible, but something had changed. There was still the anger and grief, but something else too. A sense of waiting. Waiting to see what Danny would do. They had tried tearing him, the trespasser, apart down to his core, but in doing so they had felt him. They had felt his intention to help and retreated.
Trenchcoat was wrong, there was still a sentience there. Danny found himself grinning in triumph.
But even better Danny had an idea. His core vibrated giddily in his chest. He was a bit sore, but otherwise none the worse for wear. He just needed to reach out and connect with the ghost, he felt sure he could calm them. He just he needed a distraction, he didn’t need Trenchcoat to realize he was the one doing anything ghostly. He wracked his brain, something that made noise, drew attention, was maybe a bit ridiculous, but didn’t take much of his attention from the real work-
That was it!
“Twinkle-“ his voice broke on the first word but gained strength as he continued- “twinkle little star,” Danny sang. He didn’t need to look back to see the incredulous look on Trenchcoat’s face.
He kept singing, he knew that song by heart. His mom used to sing it to him, back when she actually put him to bed. There was a stab of melancholy, but Danny clutched on to the positive aspect of the memory and reached out with his core, its hum getting stronger.
It’s okay, he told the ghost, help. Safe. Peace. Calm.
He took step by step further into the calming storm. And all the while he sung them a lullaby.
John stared.
Then he stared some more. He was doing a lot of staring today.
He couldn’t believe what he was seeing, what he was hearing.
The kid was was singing a lullaby to the spectral storm. And that wasn’t even the most baffling thing. No, the kid was singing a lullaby to the spectral storm and it was bloody working.
The storm gradually calmed until suddenly it was gone. The silence was loud in the sudden emotional void. John staggered from the sudden lack of pressure. All that malice gone in an instant. All that was left was a gently cupped ball of light in the kids hands.
“There you are,” the kid said softly in a slightly scratchy voice.
John couldn’t believe what he was witnessing. It was impossible and yet here they were.
There was a flash of light and suddenly they stood in a house. Built brick by brick by two pairs of hands. Children ran through the rooms. They grew up. They had kids of their own, who had kids of their own. They lived and they loved and they were protected.
Then they were gone.
The door shut for the last time. The house was empty.
A large metal ball slammed through the walls, spreading dust and splintering the doorframe that had measured the growth of generations. It was torn down.
It had stood here, right in what would be the plaza.
The translucent shade of an old women, bent and bony from a life of hard work, hovered in front of the kid. She warbled sadly at him. John couldn’t understand anything but the deep sadness, but it seemed the kid did.
“It’s okay,” he said embracing the spirit, somehow managing to do so despite her definitely not being solid. “You’ve done your best, nobody could ask more of you.”
He paused and his voice softened further, “it’s time to let go.”
The old lady looked over at John and gave him a stern look that had him frozen in place. She was the type of grandma that would wack his fingers if she caught him going for the cookie jar. He wasn’t entirely sure what the look he got meant. Only that it felt like an admonishment.
She looked back on the kid and her features softened, smoothed and in the next moment she turned to mist in his arms, dispersing in the waning light coming from the overhead windows.
John couldn’t entirely believe what he’d just witnessed. Calling a spirit back once they’d gone nova, it was impossible. Unheard of. Banishment was how you dealt with spirits like that. It was a tried and tested method. Yet-
John shivered.
Death magic. It was the only explanation.
The kid reeked of it, to the point John had thought he was the ghost he was here to deal with. He’d thought he was some kind of creature, but he was just a kid. A kid with a very specific magical affinity who’d just done the impossible. He was filled with a sense of awe and dread he couldn’t quite put his finger on.
He felt shaken. Like he’d stood right next to a bell who’d been rung to herald change.
John was no prophet, at most he’d get vague premonitions and he far preferred to be in the moment rather then dwell on the future or the past. He most definitely did not want to even contemplate this kid’s future. He swallowed.
Magic, in John’s experience, always came with a cost.
The kid promptly sat down on his butt. John had broken the circle and was running over before he even realized.
“You okay, kid?” He asked breathlessly.
The kid looked up, eyes a bit dazed as he blinked at John. John couldn’t really tell if his complexion was grey or it was just the dust covering every inch of him. Several places, particularly his hands, the dust was dark from blood where he’d been cut in the storm. He looked unfocused.
“How many occult detectives are you seeing?” He asked unable to hide the note of worry.
“Too many,” Kid said tiredly with a shake of his head that had cement dust falling all over. Then he looked back up and elaborated with a smirk, “one.”
John huffed a laugh. If he could joke he couldn’t be that bad off.
“How does burgers and fries sound?”
-
The kid now dusted off to the point where you could almost tell his hair was black rather than grey sunk his teeth into the burger with a pleased hum. He chewed and swallowed.
“This is almost as good as Nasty Burger.”
John paused fry halfway to his mouth. “That sounds disgusting.”
Kid laughed. “I forget how it sounds to outsiders. It used to be Tasty Burger way back when they first opened, but someone vandalized the sign and it kinda stuck.”
John hummed thoughtfully, he could appreciate the joke. Kid’s use of the phrase outsiders made it sound like he came from an insular town. Probably best for him if he stayed there.
“What’s your name, kid?”
Instantly the blue eyes narrowed on him in suspicion.
“What’s yours, Trenchcoat?” He challenged.
John huffed at the nickname and reached a hand across the table. “John Constantine.”
The kid looked suspiciously at the offered hand, then reached out and took it. “Nightingale.”
John nodded and shook his hand before letting go. Smart of him to give him a codename, he wasn’t apparently completely without sense. “Because of the singing.”
For a moment the kid looked confused to the point where John actually thought maybe he’d given him his real name.
“Singing? Ah-“ He blushed looking down and rubbed the back of his neck in embarrassment. “No, that just seemed like a good idea at the time.”
John shook his head, fuck it if he didn’t like the kid. He picked up his milkshake and raised it. He tilted his head and raised an eyebrow.
“If it works…”
The kid, Nightingale, grinned ferally and raised his own shake to clink it against John’s.

“If it works.”
-
After filling up the near bottomless stomach of the teenager, they parted ways in an alley. John’s mind was already on his next case - people going missing in a forest in Germany that had a distinct this-is-not-just-a-GPS-dead-zone flavor to it - so he only absently noted the strange look on the kid’s face when he opened the portal. It was morning in Germany, he could start looking into things before calling the House for a proper sleep.
“Take care, kid.”
With those words he stepped into the portal and let it close behind him.
Danny was left looking at the portal. He shook his head, jaw tight. With real magic apparently portals were just easy. It didn’t do him any good to think about. He glanced around and when he found the alley just as empty as before he jumped into the air transforming as he went.
There were better things to think about, like the concept of an occult detective, he thought as he flew in the direction of Amity. It sounded like it could almost be an acceptable profession in his parents’ eyes.
And it probably didn’t require good high school grades either, he thought with a grimace as he remembered he had an essay due tomorrow.
-
Hope you enjoyed this story which explored how Danny and Constantine first met in this AU. Next step is letting it sit for a while, then do a thorough editing and putting it up on ao3 as a oneshot. (And then maybe talk to Clock about starting writing on the main story proper? We'll see). Comments are greatly appreciated :D
Another link to the masterpost if you wanna see the other bits of writing and/or subscribe to the series
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vanlegion · 23 days
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dance-magic-dance · 8 months
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its wild how much engagement ofmd posts get on the max account. if you look at everything streamonmax posted in august it averages out at around 50k views per tweet. even house of the dragon gets around 200k. this video is almost at 500k views in less than 24 hours.
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Local Alchemist needed to be stopped.
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My formula of restore fatigue:
Spring salad: lettuce, radish, potato, (optional: apple, orange, watermelon). Unfortunately it has Burden side effect. (if choose orange, you'll get a bonus Shield effect) Can also side with Ranch dressing: cheese wedge, leek, onion, garlic. And this one has Damage Agility side effect. It can be fix by removing the garlic.
Potato soup: potato, garlic, leek. This recipe has Frost Shield side effect. Perfect choice for a cold weather.
Corn salsa: corn, tomato, onion, garlic. Unfortunately it has Damage Agility side effect, but you can get Detect Life in the process.
Grilled cheese sandwich: bread loaf, cheese wedge, cheese wheel. Unfortunately it has Damage Agility side effect. I should have removed the cheese wedge. Sorry Baurus :(
Classic ham sandwich: bread loaf, cheese wedge, ham, lettuce. Unfortunately this recipe also has Damage Agility side effect, but bonus Fire Shield woohoo!
Gyudon: beef, onion, rice
Mix berries: blackberry, strawberry, (we only have two kinds of berries?) (optional: apple, orange, pear). Actually, don't put apple or pear in it. They will cause Damage Health.
Crabby corn soup: crab, corn, onion. You can add cheese wedge for bonus Fire Shield (and Damage Agility) effect.
Chili con carne: beef (/boar meat /mutton /venison), onion, garlic, tomato. Side effect is Detect Life. (Beef flavor will grant you Shield effect. Unfortunately Boar meat will have burden side effect and Venison is Damage Health)
Pumpkin pie: pumpkin, sweetcake (/flour /sweetroll). Unfortunately both flour and sweetroll has Damage Personality side effect
Carrot cake: carrot, sweet cakes
Strawberry cheesecake: strawberry, cheese wedge, flour (/sweetcake /sweetroll). The flour version has Reflect Damage side effect. I highly recommend it.
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