#ray also. like i wrote him as a happy go-lucky character and i myself been fooled that hes just rainbow and sunshines

[aria0fgold]

I think the thing bout me and my own OCs is that I'm like, a stranger to em with my own preconceived perception on how they are but the longer I spend time with em, they turn out completely different so even if I'm the creator, I can't even tell if my ideas are final until I look at it again and the OC in question just goes: I would not say that.

#aria rants #lemme just tell yall bout how in the beginnin alec is straight. and after awhile i was lookin at him some more and was like: #this man... is actually so gay. i didnt know that. happy for you and im so sorry (created an oc just to be his gf) #and that same oc turned out a lesbian (who i so far think has a crush on his sister instead and like: im happy for you as well) #ray also. like i wrote him as a happy go-lucky character and i myself been fooled that hes just rainbow and sunshines #me. i been fooled by my own oc. that i wrote as someone whos a good actor to fool nearly everyone. which included me apparently #and i have a transfem oc. same process. i was like lookin at him and then i was like: should i change your gender? #and i was thinkin of just changing it from birth but it just doesnt seem right at all and then i had a thought: wait youre... trans #now i have a happy trans woman oc and im out here wondering which one of my ocs are next on the: #''i would not say that'' or ''i would not do that'' line cuz i dont know em much rn so they better speak up

[andheresthething]

I Got So Fucking Romantic, I Apologize

Summary: Cute lazy morning (afternoon) with Nightowl.

[No use of y/n] [Lazy Mornings] [But it's really 2 pm] [Cuddling & Snuggling] [Kissing] [Love Bites] [Pet Names] [Dorks in Love] [I cannot stress it enough you act like teenagers in love] [Implied Sexual Content] [You're smaller than him] [Established Relationship]

•·················•·················•

Notes:

I recently played Blooming Panic and absolutely fell HARD for Nightowl. This is the first time I've ever posted any of my writing and it's been a while since I've written at all so this will probably be rusty. I might write more (could make a spicy follow-up) if people like this one, though it might be delayed because carpal tunnel is a bitch.

Gender-neutral reader for yall :)

I wrote this while listening to my character playlist for him

Reposted from AO3

Also, I haven't used Tumblr since MIDDLE SCHOOL so I apologize for things being strange to the platform

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Rays of light shone through the drawn blinds of the bedroom you and Nightowl shared. The small beams laid across the two of you sleeping well into early afternoon. You slowly blink and let out a yawn, taking a moment to come into the conscious world.

Once your eyes adjusted you finally get a look at the blonde sleeping on his side next to you. His chest slowly rising and falling and an arm draped over you. Lips slightly apart, just enough to show a sliver of his front teeth, and his neck and collar bones covered in spots that ranged in shades of purple. Though a familiar sight for you to see each day, it never grew old. Each day, without fail, your heart would flutter the same way it did when you spent your first night together. You cracked a smile, just watching and waiting for your partner to wake.

Sometimes it was still baffling to you that clicking on a discord invite led to this. How fast everything moved between the two of you was unexpected, but not unwelcomed in the slightest. You recall all the nights the two of you would spend up, talking about anything and everything until you fell asleep. Nightowl would follow shortly after, but would never hang up the call. Some of the time right before he’d turn in as well, you were just conscious to hear him say, ‘I can’t wait until we can do this in person. Goodnight, Cutie. Sweet dreams.’

Your smile grew thinking about those early times of your relationship, though soon enough you were broken from the little daydream with the feeling of Nightowl lifting his arm off of you, stretching himself awake with a yawn.

“Mornin, sweetheart,” you said as he lowered his arm back to hold you. He sleepily smiled, then placed a light kiss on your forehead.

“Good morning, cutie,” he smiled, “Hope I didn’t keep you waiting too long.”

“Impossible, plus I lost myself in thought, so I doubt I would have noticed an hour going by.”

“Care to indulge me?” Nightowl asked while moving his hand to hold yours.

“I was just thinking about our old late-night calls before I got to move in with you and how sometimes when I was half asleep I’d hear you say how you couldn’t wait for this to happen for real and wished me goodnight”

Nightowl squeezed your hand, eyes lighting up slightly. Your little story seemed to help wake him up from his groggy state, “Awe, I love you getting all sappy and nostalgic on me first thing in the morning, cutie.”

 “I always felt all stupid and happy whenever I heard it.” 

“You know,” he scootched as close as he could be to you without being completely on top of you, “I did it every. Single. Night.” he hummed, peppering a kiss on your face between every word, and you giggled with each one.

“Really?”

He put on a serious face, sharply nodding, “Without fail. I still do actually. Granted, I’ve changed that first part a tiny bit considering you’re now actually here with me, in the flesh.”

“Awe, sweetheart, you’re literally the best. How’d I get so lucky?” you reached to hug him. Maybe a bit too enthusiastically, though, as you managed to push Nightowl over on his back and put yourself on top of him, burying your face in his neck in the process, “Seriously, I could have never imagined having someone who does stuff like that for me all to myself.”

“ You can’t believe you have me all to yourself?” Nightowl laughed, “I should be the one saying that. I was such a hungover ass to you after knowing you for, like, five days, and you still wanted to be with me after that night. You’re the one here that's the best,” he refuted, placing a kiss on the side of your head, “To have someone as precious as you makes me the lucky one here, darling.”

“Mmm, I’d have to disagree with you.”

  “Incorrect and unfactual statement.”

You lifted yourself enough to meet your eyes with his, “As much as I’d love to continue this to prove I’m, in fact, correct on this matter, I think I’m a little too tired to try.”

“So what you're saying is that I win?” he said with the biggest shit-eating grin. You groaned at his playful antic and started to push yourself up, now straddling his lap as he still laid underneath you, which also effectively pushed the blanket once covering the two of you off and behind you. 

“Sure, you win, dumbass. What shall your prize be?”

“Can it be anything?” he said excitedly.

You knew you might regret the answer you were going to give, but went through with it anyway, “Sure, anything you want, sweetheart,” with that, you sealed your fate.

“Hmm, what a tough decision to make,” Nightowl exaggeratedly pondered while pushing himself back slightly to be able to sit up with his arms supporting him from behind. You also moved so that you were sitting in his lap, legs wrapped around his bare lower waist, and brought your arms around his neck. Your arms sat on the soft fabric that was the straps of his crop top, “The possibilities are endless, cutie. How could I ever just choose one thing?”

You giggled at his complaint, “You better, the offer is going to expire soon. Then you just get bragging rights.”

“Oh, how cruel! How could you?” he moved his arms from behind him to hold your hips.

“I know, I’m such a horrible person,” you said, matching his sarcastic and playful tone.

The two of you stayed like that for a moment, you took the time to admire his face. The small beams of light highlighted his softer features. They made his messy hair shine and his brown eyes sparkle, revealing all the little flakes of different shades that resided in them.

The light also reflected off of his cartilage piercings. Nightowl had a bad habit of not taking out his earrings before bed. No matter how many times you reminded him, he always forgot. It wasn’t the end of the world that he didn’t, though. At least he remembered to take out his statement piece each night.

In that time, Nightowl did the same, soaking in the sight of you. Hair just as messy as his own, a stupid wide smile, and a pair of beaming eyes staring into his own. But your shirt, God it was killing him. It was one of his own that you’d steal regularly to wear almost anywhere. While purposefully somewhat oversized on him, you were swimming in it, allowing your neck and collar bones, covered in marks (courtesy of him), to be exposed. Maybe it was his somewhat possessive nature, but the mix of the shirt and hickies fogged his mind with a myriad of thoughts ranging from wholesome to extremely sexual.

“Have you made a decision yet?” your words snapped him out of his short, albeit very vivid, daydream, “Or are we just going to settle for bragging rights?”

“Nope! I’ve come up with my prize.”

“That would be?”

“One super lazy, stay-in-date day complete with stupid horror movies and possibly some more… intimate affairs later on,” he paused, “Please.”

You pretended to think it over, despite the arrangement of this prize. While you, of course, got tasked with a pile of work for the weekend, you couldn’t care less about it. Getting ripped by your boss on Monday would be worth it, especially with the not-at-all-subtle proposition for later in the day. Knowing Nightowl though, it would probably come way sooner than nightfall. “You, sir, have yourself a deal.”

You gave him a small peck, but Nightowl being Nightowl, was having none of that. He immediately put his lips back on yours, tightening his grip on your hips. While it took you slightly by surprise, you gladly accepted the act, kissing him back. Quickly things became heated, pulling each other closer, the movement of your lips becoming desperate. Your hands drifted to his hair, lightly grabbing at it, which Nightowl responded to by letting out a small moan into your mouth. That noise of his set you off, eager to continue the sudden act of intimacy. 

Unfortunately, as quickly as it picked up, it stopped. Nightowl pulled away and loosened his hold on you, causing you to let out a small whine of disappointment.

“As much as I don’t want to stop this right now, cutie, I’m starving for some actual food, not just you.” 

You let out a chuckle, arms going back down to rest on his shoulders, “You’re such a tease.”

“Says the one wearing nothing but my shirt,” he flirted, a shit-eating grin plastered on his face once again. “Looks great on you, by the way. Makes your ass and thighs look fantastic. Especially your thighs.”

“I do, in fact, have something on under, mister,” you retorted, “But if you’re that hungry, I guess we could go scrounge up something, but by we, I mean me. We both know you can't cook for shit.”

“Ouch, that one stung.”

“It’s not that bad if I like cooking and you like eating it. Plus, you get to stare at my thighs all you want while I do so.”

“A win is a win,” he lifted one hand off your hips to cup your cheek. “Shall we then?”

“To the kitchen!” you giggled. 

Nightowl gave you one last kiss on your forehead before putting his hand down, allowing you to get up off of him and the bed. He followed suit, loosely holding your hand. With that, you led the way out of the bedroom and into the kitchen to start your long date day at 2 pm.

#blooming panic #bloomic #blooming panic fanfic #bloomic fanfic #nightowl #blooming panic nightowl #bp nightowl #bloomic nightowl #blooming panic x reader #nightowl x reader #bp nightowl x reader #bloomic nightowl x reader #sfw

[creedslove]

LOVE LOVE LOVE HOW UR BUILDING UP THE PLOT!!!!

Loved part 3 so much!!!!!! <333

I just hope you don’t rush with the story, you’re an amazing writer I am so impressed, I usually only see smut or the storyline doesn’t resonate or feels forced. The fact that for once you’re giving so much thought into this, you’re building the anticipation, you have gotten us rooting for the reader, even if you write 100 parts of the story I know it’ll all be amazing because you’re great at delivering !!

For a long time I was looking for a fic with Pedro x reader but writers only choose his characters from shows/movies. I wonder what made you think to start writing about him and not his characters?

Take care writer, you’re putting amazing work out here, we love uuuuu <3

🤍🩶🤍🩶🤍

thank you so much anon, your words are motivating and really sweet! ❤️💖

I don't think I'll rush any chapters I mean, all the chapters were absolutely not planned, I wrote Betrayed as an one shot but people got into it and asked for a part two, which brought a part three, then part four and five (that's being written right now) I have absolutely no idea how many chapters we still have ahead, I just hope I won't go into any writer's block because I'm really enjoying this story and the ideas come naturally and when they don't, I get lots of amazing anon suggestions to work on, so I feel really lucky, to see people are actually invested.

I'm happy you are enjoying it, when I write a story, I try to write something interesting it would catch my attention and I would read it if I someone else had written it, you know what I mean? And I've always loved angst with happy endings, but I like the build up more than the ending when it's done properly and I noticed there's a lot Pedro stories that are rushed to the happy ending, which I don't blame because honestly who wouldn't want to live happily ever after with that man lmao and he is all the time a ray of sunshine to reader which I also enjoy because it brings us comfort when we read it but I thought to myself: what if he is just a normal guy who screws up like everyone else and is too stubborn to admit it? And people enjoyed that portrait! And we all project ourselves into reader, just like I said in another ask, in my mind reader is me just like she is you when you reader and so on, so we honestly just root for ourselves to be strong enough to fend for ourselves no matter how hot Pedro is while breaking our heart 😂😂😂

And the main reason why I began writing about Pedro is because I got into him because of him and not his characters. I had never watched anything he was on and I always saw people gushing about him on Twitter but never got the fuss about it, until about a month or so when whenever I logged on Instagram random pictures or reels of him would show up in my suggestions. I would usually ignore them until I came across that one where he talks about how people usually pronounce 'Pedro' and then he tells the interviewer his full name, using his beautiful accent and as I study Spanish I just LOVED the sound of that. Then other videos of him would appear and I would send them to my friend who really loves him because it reminded me of her. So I went from this guy isn't that ugly to he's not ugly at all to holy shit he's very handsome.

But the cherry on top was about three weeks ago I was going through a rough time where my immune system wasn't great or whatever and I was constantly sick, I had been sick for over a month before that and each week I would have a different problem lol and that week i was again sick and it just drained me emotionally because i was feeling so weak and all the antibiotics I took made me feel physically bad as well and my work schedule was hectic as always, long story short I was a walking corpse that week until I began dreaming about him at night.

The first time I dreamed about Pedro, it was silly but also really sweet, I dreamed I was at the mall, running some errands and with my headphones on, then the song 'Otro día que va' by RBD began playing and I sang along to it and it caught his attention because it was in Spanish so he made small talk and we began chatting, then he invited me for lunch and it was adorable because it was kinda a lunch day. So when I woke up I felt so happy and comforted about the dream and the following nights I also dreamed about him, he was always so sweet in flirty in my dreams and we spoke a lot of Spanish that spiced up things a little bit lol and by the end of the week I already had a massive crush on him, lol

But I wrote for one of his characters: Javier Peña because he makes me feel things™ and I'll probably write more when inspiration comes, just like I'll probably write for Joel Miller in the future because he also makes me feel things™ but so far, my main focus is nuestro dulce pedrito porque lo amo 💖

Thanks a lot anon, your ask was amazing and don't forget the only reason I write it's because of you all and how amazing and support of my work you all are!

❤️❤️❤️

#ask #answered #pedro #pascal

[musicallisto]

Hello love,

Congratulations for the 800 followers! You absolutely deserve this and so much more! I'm happy to see how your blog grows and that you're still providing all of us with wonderful content. You're one of the first blogs that I've started to follow here on Tumblr and I'm so lucky to have found your blog ♡

As for your celebration event, could I please request a 🍨 vanilla milkshake with a male Peaky Blinders Character?

I'm more on the curvy side (and insecure about it) and I'm ALWAYS wearing black (which I love, no matter what others say or even more if they object). As for my personality, I'm a highly complex, paradox and complicated individium. I'm unbelievable patient, timid, awkward, kind, forgiving, open-minded, compassionate, thruthful, gentle and calm and I've been told that I have a calming effect on others, that I can easily ground anyone and anything, no matter how troubled their mind is. I prefer vintage over modern things. I think rather deep which often leads me to overthinking everything, which in turn leads me to doubting (very much) myself. You would be surprised how timid and reserved I am, I'm sure you wouln't notice me in a room full of people if it wouldn't be for my different appearance (but I like it this way). I'm always well-meaning, yet often misunderstood (maybe because it's hard for me to articulate myself). I can be incredible lazy, clumsy and forgetful. I've always felt like I don't really belong anywhere, so I've started to distance myself from others a while ago. I'm a outsider, weird, a dork, not normal, a loner and I fucking love it, because I like to be different, I would hate to fit into just one box and to be like everyone else. And I like people who are not ashamed to be their 100% true self, no matter how different that is from the mainstream. I'm the most loyal person you'll ever find, once you earn my trust, I'll always be on/by your side, no matter what. That says a lot, because I'm hard to scare away. Sometimes I feel alienated from the people and things surrounding me and I'm sure that I annoy and bore them. I'm very nervous and insecure around others, which is why I try to avoid people and why I'm not talking all that much around them (though, I'm a really good listener). I'm easily overwhelmed by large crowds and much light/noise, that's why I don't like to go outside, I prefer to cozy up at home. I would never intentionally hurt a animal and I'm not eating any meat, which is very important to me. I believe that there isn't a ounce of cruelty inside me. I'm unassuming and understanding, I only believe what I've witnessed on my own and I have endless acceptance for almost everything. Due to my Insomnia, I'm a night owl. I have strong personal values, am very opinionated and I'm really in-touch with myself and even though I'm extremly insecure, I would never reduce or change myself and views/opinions for someone and I neither have a problem to challenge authority and advocating for my beliefs. I'm a perfectionist and sometimes I really hate it. And, as you can see, I'm unable to be brief. My favourite colours are dark green, black, gold and dark purple. My greatest passion is music, even if I can't sing or play an instrument.(I prefer rock/punk/pop/80s/90s) It's the most calming and therapeutic thing when it comes to my anxiety and depression and I could never live a day without it. You will never see me in the street without headphones in my ears and even when I'm at home there's music playing almost all the time. I could talk for hours about music and what it means to me. And otherwise I love to watch films and series (I like fantasy, horror, psychological thriller, science fiction and psychological drama and almost anything from the 70s, 80s and 90s). I love rainy days and to go outside while it's pouring big, fat drops. What I love the most is to drive around without a destination, while talking and listening to music. And I love to spend time with my cat, if I could, I would have endless animals who live peacefully and loved with me. I enjoy to have deep talks and to be challenged to think. I love to take late-night-strolls, while gazing into the sky and watching the stars/moon. I have a fascination for dark and macabre things.

I really hope that's not too much? But thank you anyway ♡

Have a good day!

thank you so much for your kind words, you have no idea how much it means to me to know that I was one of the first blogs you followed ;; here’s your vanilla milkshake - and it’s also my first time writing for peaky blinders, but I hope it’s alright; and I hope finn shelby will find the portrait I paint of him accurate enough...

Birmingham was a drab and disheartening place enough without the war adding to its joylessness; but somehow the streets are even worse to bear deserted than when they’re bustling and fetid. Especially for a ten year old boy who wants nothing but to play with someone, to talk to someone, to see someone.

With his brothers off fighting somewhere in France and his aunt too busy with her businesses (adult stuff that Finn has absolutey no interest in attempting to understand), the youngest Shelby has been fighting off an affliction worse than consumption and measles, because much more insidious for a boy his age; boredom

and he’s so sad, so irrevocably sad, with no one to bruise his knees with and throw mud at, that he just aimlessly wanders the empty streets whenever aunt Polly isn’t looking, to find a semblance of stimulation

(he used to enjoy the solitude, it gave him time to imagine delirious stories in fantastical worlds and read the most enthralling of novels, but not anymore. four years of reclusion is an awfully long time for a little boy.)

and it’s during one of his escapades that he first meets you

you’re a little girl his age, dressed in a pretty dress, wearing pretty booties and holding a pretty little woven basket, but your face is stuck on the most grouchy frown he’s ever seen on a little girl, and you don’t walk, you stomp down the wet pavement like a wrathful titan

And it’s probably the first time in four years that he’s been this close to making a new friend, so he walks up to you, despite how rusty his communication skills have become

“Girls don’t frown. It’s unbecoming.”

(Yes, pretty rusty indeed; but in his defense, he’s ten, he’s bored, he’s lonely, and he’s only ever heard Ada say it, and Ada is the most level-headed of his siblings, so anything she says must be true, right?)

“Shut up.”

(Well, if it was unbecoming of you to frown, it’s even more to rebuff someone so rudely. You don’t even spare a glance and continue walking; he has to hurry to catch up to you.)

“You can’t say that. It’s a bad word.”

“How do you know that?”

“My family says it all the time, but they told me I can’t say it.”

“Well, my family is not your family. And I hate my family!”

You’ve yelled the last words at the sky, so loud that the crows on the neighboring roofs have taken off in a startled flight.

“They want to wear this stupid dress to go to the stupid market to buy stupid meat. I don’t even want to eat meat, that’s cruel! And I don’t even want to wear a frilly dress! I want to wear black!”

And in saying so you tugged at the pink and white ribbons that encircled your waist.

And Finn couldn’t help being extremely intrigued at this little girl who said bad words and refused to eat meet and wanted to wear black. It was the most exciting thing to ever happen in all the duration of the war.

“You want to wear a black dress?”

“Yes, but my mama won’t let me. She says it’s too sad because of the war. But black isn’t sad! Black is beautiful!”

“Maybe I could find you a black dress. I’m sure my sister must have one. Where do you live?”

And, loyal to his promise, the following morning he had run to your doorstep and snuck into your house - a proper Shelby talent, to be able to go unnoticed or make a ruckus depending on the occasion - with an old, crinkled mourning dress of Ada’s, that had probably belonged to his mother and had been mended several times

And it was obviously five sizes too big for you and you looked more like a ghost from one of Finn’s horror novels, your arms floating in the sleeves and the hem of the skirt pooling at your feet, but your smile was the brightest light he’d ever seen in this whole damn town.

“Do you like it?”

(He didn’t really know why he sounds so nervous. Maybe it was having a friend, a real friend, and doing something personal for them... or maybe it had to do with how fast his heart beat, watching you in that gigantic, shapeless dress)

“I love it! Thank you so much, Finn!”

From then on started one of the most wonderful friendships Finn would ever have, and what would bring a ray of light to the grim existence of a little boy in the midst of a global war

Despite the ration cards, despite the loneliness, despite the worry that tugged at his stoic aunt’s eyes for her son and nephews across the Channel... he found an unspeakable solace in your friendship

And one day, without a trace, you were gone

He knocked on your door; gone. He asked all the neighbors what had happened to the family that lived there; gone. He wrote you letters and sent them to the confines of England; gone. He got scolded by Polly for marking numbers at random on Tommy’s state-of-the-art telephone; gone.

Suddenly he was back to the bleak existence he had battled with before meeting you, and the hollow inside his chest only grew wider as the days went on, because he had no explanation as to what had happened to you, and worried every single day

Thankfully, the war ended not long after, and his brothers came back home, all alive and unscathed - well, for the most part

Fast forward more or less ten years, and much has changed in Finn Shelby’s life and in old Birmingham, but the memory of you still stugs at his heartstrings

One evening, he’s tasked by Arthur to run some errands, send a few messages, scout a few places; the most dangerous thing his older brothers will ever let him do

His task leads him to a bar in the center of town, one that pours its joyous light and music into the street outside; he’s there to meet with a client, arrange a meeting; nothing he’s hasn’t done already

But the evening takes a turn for the unexpected when he recognizes the girl sat alone at a table, enjoying the musicians’ jazz with an air of pure bliss on her face

It’s been ten years, of course, but... it’s unmistakable. That face, that silhouette, and the black ensemble from head to toe... and he’s always had a knack for remembering faces, especially those that mark him deeply

Suddenly he’s frozen on the spot, and he has forgotten why he came to the bar in the first place, what his target looks like - all he knows is you, and how beautiful you look in the dim light of the bar, and the undisclosed and unknown feelings he had for you at the time come flooding back.

Except this time, he understands, and he fears them, because he doesn’t have time for any of this, and it’s way too dangerous for you and him

But he can’t just pass you by and not say a word?

He swallows, hard.

And walks up to you.

“Y/N?”

You open your eyes, and your face flashes with recognition, and a little bit of pain as well. Even if you fled without a word, and left him hanging all these years, he’s incapable of rancor

“Finn... wow, you’ve changed so much.”

“You haven’t.”

He gestures at your face, your clothes, how you savor the music like the finest drink in the world, and you laugh and blush, sending his heart into overdrive

“Where were you all this time?”

“I’m so sorry, Finn... my brother died in the war, and... my mom sent me to live with my grandparents in Scotland. We were all destroyed by grief... I needed to get away.”

“Without explanation? Not even a word?”

“I wanted to write to you, so bad, but... I couldn’t remember your address. I couldn’t remember anything about Birmingham at all...”

He nods, slowly, in understanding.

The war opens wounds that never heal, even after all the most beautiful friendships and love stories in the world.

“But I’m really glad I found you.”

His heart is pounding in his throat. Maybe it’s a sign of destiny that he found you here, tonight, alone, and ready to welcome him back. Maybe it’s a word from fate, that you can never truly be apart.

So he takes the seat in front of you, and you smile, that shy but bright smile of yours, and he forgets all about his mission, his client, and his brothers.

They’ll have to understand.

800 follower sleepover

#lunamooney2406 #sleepover800 #ship request #peaky blinders #peaky blinders ship #finn shelby #finn shelby x reader #peaky blinders headcanons #finn shelby headcanons #for some reason the first thing I write for a new fandom is always SUPER LONG but that's because i get rlly in my feelings

[pluckyredhead]

Director's commentary on It wouldn't be make believe? 🥺 Thanks I love your writing

Aw, thank you! This is a long fic so I’m gonna skim it and bullet some thoughts, let’s see:

Mxyzpills - I’m still so pleased with myself about this one. At the risk of over-explaining the joke, the “ninety-day high” is a reference to how when Superman banishes Mxyzptlk back to his dimension, he can’t return for ninety days. It’s also an insanely long time to be high for, why would anyone take this drug.

“He wasn’t naive—they could simply be sneaking upstairs to paw at each other.“ - I find Damian’s voice fairly easy to write in but this is a good example of where I struggled to find a balance between his very formal, disdainful word choices and not making him sound like a computer. I tried “fornicate” and “have intercourse” (lol) before I landed on “paw at each other,” which leans more on the “Damian is contemptuous of other people’s desires” side of things (as opposed to “Damian has never met another human but has read about them in books”).

The little knit cap on the TP in the frat bathroom makes me laugh so hard. Yes, I know I wrote it. If I can’t laugh at my own jokes, who will?

One of my guiding principles when writing Damian is that he’s really, really smart, but the problem is that he knows it, which means that he assumes that any idea he has is by default going to be intelligent. This allows him to do really stupid things like go undercover at a university attended by his best friend, who has super hearing and X-ray vision, and assume said friend won’t notice he’s there. Bless his heart.

“Please. I would never wear a shirt with this low of a thread count by choice.” - lololol

WAYNE GRAYSON god I’m a riot

I really wanted to convey a sense that Jon is very big and smells very good and has no sense of personal boundaries whatsoever, at least with Damian. Damian uses his body very well as a weapon but is otherwise completely disconnected from it, and Jon’s presence is a very physical one, and Damian has no idea what to do with that.

Love writing me some jealous Damian, especially because neither of them realize that’s what’s happening here. He only wants Jon to be friends with him! For reasons!!!

For some reason, Jon laughed at that. - It was important to me that Jon not come across as stupid in this. He’s puppyish and sweet, but he’s extremely bright and significantly more emotionally intelligent than Damian.

I think the fic is as long as it needs to be but I kind of wish I’d expanded on the idea that Jon is friends with everyone on campus and at least half of them have crushes on him.

Lian absolutely sent Jon the picture of him and Damian on the beach because she knew Jon had a crush on Damian. They’ve definitely talked about it.

“If I were your classmate, I’d be more curious about your apparently immortal dog.” - KRYPTO WILL NEVER DIE!!!

Damian’s insistence on paying for everything is basically a gesture of ownership, or chivalry if you want to be nice about it. He doesn’t even realize he’s doing it.

Jon being secretly in love with Damian from practically the start of their friendship is firm head canon for me, I believe in it with all of my being.

“Jon probably shouldn’t find Damian more endearing the ruder he got, but, well, here he was.“ - Jon is wildly entertained by Damian being an asshole, which is lucky for him because that particular behavioral tic isn’t going anywhere. Another thing I really wanted to make clear was that Jon sees Damian for exactly who he is - prickly and cranky and arrogant and stubborn - and loves him for all of it.

“I assume you’ve been texting each other positive affirmations when I’m not looking.” - I want to be part of the Kent family group text! So many heart emojis, so many photos of outer space.

“The Big Apricot” - is 100% a canon nickname for Metropolis and it makes me so happy.

Jon’s eyes are canonically blue but fuck that, I gave him Lois’s violet eyes because a) she deserves to have some of her genes replicated too and b) the more of a beautiful anime prince I can make Jon, the better.

Damian trying not to look at Jon because he is TOO SEXY is everything to me, I am so delighted by my own story.

Also firm head canon to me: Jon’s hair only ever falls into two categories, somewhat messy and very messy.

Damian removed his arm from Jon’s trim waist, feeling suddenly uncomfortable. - I didn’t do a lot with it here but part of why Damian is so deeply repressed about his feelings for Jon is because of the age difference - he feels guilty being attracted to Jon, even though the difference between 19 and 22 is much less significant than, say, 12 and 15. I think Damian already has a lot of shame and guilt hardwired into him re: bodily pleasures - thanks, both of his parents! - and Jon’s age just makes it worse.

The scene where Damian wakes up from a nightmare and almost stabs a practically naked Jon was one of the reasons I wrote the fic. 😈 One of Damian’s greatest fears is hurting his loved ones and he really can’t do that to Jon, at least not by accident. Also Jon is not the slightest bit afraid of him.

Relatedly, Damian has never been safe or secure a day in his life, but Jon represents absolute safety. Damian is 100% not ready to process his feelings about that or even admit that he might like to be able to let his guard down for a little while.

Aw yeah, that good good part of the fake dating where they’re both uncomfortable because they want it to be real dating and are picking up on the other’s discomfort and totally misreading it. Love that shit.

Damian: “If I have to kiss Jon again to save our lives, I will do it. I will fall on that sword. It’s a sacrifice, but one I’m willing to make.” ok bro

"Frat Chat” lololol

JON’S PARENTS ARE BOTH INVESTIGATIVE JOURNALISTS, DAMIAN, HE CAN TELL WHEN YOU’RE LYING

Is this how parademons work? Who knows? Who cares? My apologies to Jack Kirby, if they are necessary.

As you will know if you’ve read...anything I’ve ever written, “character’s loved one is hurt so they go fucking feral” is MY FAVORITE THING, which is why there’s a twofer here. And Damian goes feral so well.

Also my favorite thing: the sweet one asking the feral one to spare the bad guy’s life. Ahhhh this fic is so self-indulgent and I’m not even sorry.

I wanted both Jon and Damian to be right about Chazz - he was involved, but not willingly. Their partnership works not because Damian is The Smart One or Jon is The Good One, but because they balance each other out - trust and cynicism, evidence and faith.

Damian totally kissed Jon better. ;)

Damian: “Oh, I’m in love with you? Wait, I need to analyze every thought and feeling I’ve ever had in light of this new information, give me a minute.”

And Jon teases him about it because teasing Damian is his absolute favorite thing to do. <333

IN CONCLUSION, THESE BABIES ARE IN LOVE AND I’M SO HAPPY ABOUT IT.

#i write things #super sons #superboy #jon kent #robin #damian wayne #Anonymous

[ogmosis]

CRIME FICTION INTERVIEW: ROD REYNOLDS

Rod Reynolds is one of the best crime fiction authors to emerge in the last five years, his Charlie Yates trilogy set in the USA up there with other British writers such as Ray Celestin as well as Americans like Attica Locke and James Lee Burke. I had heard of Rod's work in the industry, but it wasn't until lockdown that I had the time to indulge in his writing. His ear for American dialogue from the 1940s is excellent, while his plotting and characters draw you in - the protagonists and antagonists constantly criss-crossing the line between good and evil. After moving on from Charlie and Faber for the time being, his latest book Blood Red City for Orenda Books is set in London - the city where he grew up as a council estate boy. Rod kindly took time out from working on his new book to talk about his career journey, inspirations and fitting writing in around bringing up young children.

How did a lad from Camden end up mining 1940s America for his first published novels?

I took a sabbatical from advertising in 2010 for a year to try and write a novel. I took a distance learning course with The London School of Journalism. I had never written anything, even though I have always been a big reader of crime. I grew up on a council estate in Camden and I didn't know anyone who had ever done anything like that. It was only as I got older, one of my old bosses was writing a book and he said, "You know what, why can't it be someone like us". I wrote a novel, sent it off to a million agents and got rejected, but got some really nice feedback saying, “This story doesn't work, but keep writing”. I went back to work with a new job, real life took over for a couple of years and it got to a point where I needed to decide whether I needed to do anything with this or put it away as a flight of fancy. I had the idea for the book that would become The Dark Inside after I stumbled across a real-life case that inspired it and I did some research into it. I had the voice at least that would become the character of Charlie Yates and it was quite vivid in my mind, so to give myself a shove I signed up to do the Masters course at City, University of London in novel writing. I was really lucky as it was the first year they ran a crime specific course with novelist Claire McGowan, amongst others. I had some amazing teaching that helped me develop the book and I ended up getting picked up by my first agent before I graduated then, not too long after, I landed with Faber. Lucky coming together of different circumstances.

How hard was it to change your mindset from advertising to novel writing?

I was a buyer in advertising, so that was a very social job. Great in some ways as you could get to take clients to drinks, dinner and parties, but I was working silly hours. I had reached my natural conclusion with advertising as I had done my 10-year stint. I wasn't passionate about it anymore. I was specifically dealing with newspapers, which was a declining sector of the industry. I was already looking at having to change my skill set if I wanted to carry on, so it wasn't too hard for me to walk away in that sense. I miss being around the office with the team I worked with. If I could have done the job from Thursday lunchtime to Friday evening, I would have happily done that forever. The rest of the week I could leave out. One of the reasons that I wanted to do the City of London course, because I was working full-time, I needed something to structure me and find that time in my week to write. I was also working on a deadline that we were due our first child halfway through the course, so I had to get that done. After I left my job, I swapped with my wife once she finished her maternity leave so I was looking after our little one at the time. It was helpful in a way because the only time I could write was at nap time or in the evenings. No time to worry about whether it was perfect, so I just got the words out and got the book done. Towards the end of the second novel, we were expecting our second child so the book had to be done again. My kids are school age now. I kind of look back and think, "How the hell did I work to those restrictions?" It is like anything - you get used to it and find a way.

I think Charlie Yates is one of the most flawed and interesting crime fiction protagonists we have seen in recent years, so how did he evolve?

James Ellroy was the big starting point for me, even after I got into Chandler, Hammett et al. Charlie started out as a voice that I could hear in my head, even if that sounds ephemeral or arty. I had this world weary, beaten down, over the hill journalist who kind of hated himself. I could hear how he would approach this situation whereby he is taken from being cynical in New York City and plunged into this seemingly nothing story in the Deep South which suddenly becomes very important to him, because he can see the effect on people in the town, the victims and their families. It is a matter of life and death. It is based on the real-life Texarkana Moonlight Murders in 1946. I wanted to fictionalise that scenario. The reason he comes from New York is that I read that a journalist from The Times in London was sent over to cover it, but it felt a little bit contrived so the next best alien place for me was New York as it was closer to understanding someone's life from London than somewhere else.

Did the clever FBI through line arrive at the start of your outlining?

Initially it was only going to be a standalone book, then I was going to write a second novel set in the same universe with different characters - something that Ellroy has done and I love. When Faber bought The Dark Inside, they asked for Charlie to come back and that wasn't too tricky. Colt Tanner came about essentially as someone I wanted to write to challenge myself and have fun with. He is unashamedly on both sides of the law. He is willing to do bad things, but he is on the side of the angels in his own mind. He is utterly convinced that the ends justify the means because of what he is trying to achieve. Charlie has got his own flaws and is riddled with self-doubt, while Colt is absolutely certain of his own moral rectitude.

How difficult was the Bugsy Siegel arc to write about?

I have been lucky enough to travel to Las Vegas a number of times over the years and I wanted to write something set there in the early days because it was such a sleazy, strange, literal desert outpost that became almost overnight this gambling mecca. I hadn't planned to involve it in the series and, when I travelled to Texarkana on a research trip and I was finishing up a draft of The Dark Inside, we were driving to Memphis to catch a flight to somewhere else and we passed this town called Hot Springs. I started reading up on the history of this town and how it had been run by this English gangster, who was sent down from New York and all this incredible history that it had. Bugsy Siegel was a regular visitor there and it looks like he took some of its influence as the blueprint for Vegas. Suddenly it just came together. That was book two sorted and I had a story I wanted to tell, and I can then link that straight to Bugsy finishing off the Flamingo in Vegas throughout book three. I was very lucky that Hot Springs, this town in the middle of nowhere in Arkansas that was really isolated in a valley fifty miles down the road from Texarkana, was Siegel's favourite location.

Are you a pantser or a plotter?

I love dialogue. I enjoy it the most and find it the most natural. I am a reluctant plotter. I started out as a pantser with a plan only really in my head but, with each book, the more I plan at the start the more it helps me at the back end. I was worried that it would stifle creativity and actually it is not really the case. I can now start with the synopsis and a route map I know I am going to try and follow. If I veer off from that and find better ways that is not a problem, but it is when you don't have that and don't know how to get from A to B or E to F in the middle of the story - that is when you can end up struggling.

Did you struggle getting back into a British groove for the new book?

All the stuff that I had written had been set in the States, even my first novel that was unpublished. You think it would be easy to write British as it is all around us and I am also writing in the present day without having to worry about anachronisms and regional dialects which was a tricky thing with the previous books, but it took a while to get those beats to make it sound authentic and the way I heard it in my head. I am not one for sharing my stuff until I am absolutely happy with it and satisfied it is as good as I can make it, then I am quite lucky in that I have a couple of trusted readers that I send it to. One will tell me if the story is good and then one will find any tiny mistake that I have made and picks up stuff even copy editors can miss. Karen Sullivan from Orenda Books is great. She does the first edit for Orenda, then we work with West Camel who is her editor and he goes through it a second time and incorporates his feedback. It is nice to have that two-stage process. Blood Red City is out in paperback and has done really well. Financial Times picked it as one of their summer reads. The reviews have been great and people have been getting in touch to say that they have enjoyed it. Orenda have a big network of bloggers and readers on board and that is helpful as it touches on themes that some people might find off-putting. It starts with financial crime and I didn't want to put it solely in that direction as it is about murder and London. Orenda have a small team, but they have built an incredible presence.

What are your hopes going forward?

The story I am working on at the moment has elements of a psychological thriller about it, even though it didn't start out that way. This new one was supposed to be a big departure. I was looking at something like a Sliding Doors thing with parallel lives, but at the start of lockdown I cut half the story, which was quite painful, but I am enjoying writing it. I also have a second book with Orenda, which is going through edits and is set in the present day in the States based on another real-life case. Hopefully that is out in 2021. As a community, you will do well to find a warmer or more welcoming bunch of people than we have in crime fiction. You think there would be some competitiveness, but I haven't seen any.

Find out more about Rod HERE.  Buy Rod’s Charlie Yates trilogy HERE. Check out his new book Blood Red City HERE.

#true crime #crime #crime fiction #rod reynolds #orenda books #faber #books #books and literature #texarkana #bugsy siegel #fbi #blood red city #the dark inside #black night falling #cold desert sky #charlie yates #publishing

[hymn2000]

Chiquitita - MCU AU fanfic - C19

Story summary: Something strange is happening. Someone from space has made their way to Earth, armed with a strange weapon. Targeting teenagers, their ray gun, when fired, turns the victim into a toddler. The Avengers set out to stop this, and find a way to reverse the effects. However, they don’t all come out of the battle unscathed.

Previous chapters: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18

Part of my Frostiron and Spiderson series.

Warnings/themes: de-aging, family stuff, corporal punishment (early chapters only), mental health stuff, hurt/comfort, hospital/medical stuff

 Content warning: this chapter follows strong themes by way of discussion about death and bereavement, including mentions of child and infant death. If you want to skip this chapter and want a summary of important points in it, please comment and I'll be happy to give you an overview

Chapter 19 - Memories, Good Days, Bad Days

-

Bruce stepped up and offered to look after Peter on Thursday so Loki and Tony could go out. It was the seventh of the month, and Bruce knew there was always an unavoidable commitment on that day.

Tony grabbed Loki’s hand just inside the cemetery gates.

“I’m not ready”

Loki looked at him. “Ok. Do you want to have a little walk round first?”

Tony nodded, keeping tight hold of Loki. “Can you take the flowers?”

“Of course” 

Loki took the bouquet from him, balancing it against his free arm. Loki squeezed Tony’s hand reassuringly, starting down the adjacent path. They walked for some time, before turning down one row of graves. There were lots of black marble kerb headstones filled with coloured glass pebbles and personalised memorials. Many of them had cards and flowers and plaques and statues and candles. Some had bottles of beer balanced on their edges, obviously something the deceased had been a fan of. Many of them showed the persons interests in life;- television programmes, songs, hobbies, and the like. Many of the mens ones had football team logos and colours on them. Almost all of them had photos of the person included. They were big, shrine-like monuments, and they were beautiful. 

Tony held Loki’s hand tight as they walked down the rows. They later stopped in front of one of the graves. Blue pebbles. Little statues of Disney characters. A framed poem about daughters. 

“She was only eight” 

“Does it make you wonder what happened?”

Tony nodded. “These people are all so young. I think a lot of them, those teenagers, it could have been traffic accidents or something... Illnesses, maybe. This little girl... Maybe she was sick”

“We’ll never know, unless it explicitly states. But it’s not our place to know” Loki looked at the picture of the little girl printed onto the headstone. “Aside from that stillborn, I think this is the youngest out of these ones”

“One of them was six” Tony said. He swallowed hard. “These are nice, aren’t they? They’re so personal. You can tell how much all these people were loved”

“Is it bad, do you think, that I like looking at them?”

“No” Tony shook his head. “I do too, in a way. It’s peaceful, and it’s interesting. Just... it’s horrible, isn’t it? Loss”

Loki’s mouth twitched. He started to walk again, so Tony did too. They were slow, taking their time, reading everything, looking at everything. Tony stopped again, in front of a grave for a young baby. 

“Three months old” he said. “There’s a baby and child cemetery here, isn’t there? Why are some of them over here?”

“I suppose it’s up to the family where they want them buried” Loki said. “Maybe it’s easier for them, having them separate from everyone else’s lost little ones”

Tony looked up, and Loki did too. In the near distance, they could see the start of that section of the cemetery. They could see the first few headstones, one of them clearly shaped like a teddy bear, and age balloons visible flying above.

“Do you want to go over?”

“Oh Tony, I can’t” Loki said. “Even just looking from over here breaks my heart. I hate that that bit even has to exist”

Tony leant his head against Loki’s shoulder. “I’ve imagined this twice”

“Imagined what?”

“Coming here for... someone else”

Loki stayed quiet.

“The night of the accident, it went through my head. Until we saw him. And again that night he had that building site accident, and he had a reaction to those antibiotics, and his heart stopped”

“Don’t” Loki said. “Seriously, don’t. Even if it’s just a concept come to light from fear, I can’t bear to hear it. It makes it feel like a very real possibility and I just can’t torture myself like that. Not over our son”

“I’m sorry. It’s just... My mind is absolutely racing right now. I don’t even really know why”

Loki sighed and squeezed his hand. “It’s just like that sometimes. We’ve had a tough few weeks too”

“Loki... You’ve seen babies die before. How do you cope with it? Do you remember them all, or does it all kinda merge together?”

“Jo Jo and I have a book” Loki said. “It’s a blue marbled notebook with a stork carved into the cover. He writes in blue, and I write in green. We’ve got the names of every baby we’ve lost in there. We write their name, or their family name if they didn’t have one, and we write the dates and the times. We write about what happened and how we felt about it. We get it out of our systems as quickly as possible. It’s easier to get out the emotional side of it before we have to do the official reports... I haven’t lost anywhere near as many as I’ve seen delivered. The NICU nurses aren’t so lucky”

“When we have our baby, do you think you’ll quit?”

Loki paused for a moment, looking down at the teddies and toys on the babies grave. 

“...No, I don’t think so. If I could go back to work there after my long hospital stay, and after losing May, and after all the times Peter’s ended up in A&E, I don’t think having our baby is going to make me give it up” he said. “I think I’ll carry on regardless” 

Tony swallowed. “I like Oliver”

“Hm?”

“For a boy” Tony said. “Oliver for a boy. Oliver Stark”

“What about a girl?”

“I don’t know. I haven’t thought of anything for a girl yet”

“What about May?”

Tony went quiet for a moment. “I don’t think Peter would like it. Not as a first name. Maybe as a middle name. Something May Stark”

“Princess”

“What?”

“Princess” Loki repeated. “I had a dream... We thought we’d decided on a shortlist of names, but then the baby was born and she was just too perfect for any of them. We were cradling her in our arms and we were talking to her, calling her our little princess, and we looked at each other, and we just knew...”

“Princess...” Tony said. “Princess May Stark. Or Oliver Stark. Oliver Loki Stark?”

“I think we may need to brainstorm that one a little further” Loki said softly, but he was touched.

“I think it’d be nice to name him after you. I think we should name the baby after someone, anyway”

“And here I was, thinking we had said that we were going to wait until conception before thinking up baby names”

“We also originally said we’d wait until the new year before asking Peter if we could adopt him, and we barely lasted a fortnight before we cracked on that one”

Loki smiled at him. “Ah, you’re right there. So. Princess May Stark, or Oliver Stark. Loki, Tony, Peter, and Princess”

“Or Loki, Tony, Peter, and Oliver” Tony raised Loki’s hand to his mouth and kissed it. He took a deep breath. “I think I’m ready now”

Loki nodded “I think I am too”

-

They looked down at the grave. The headstone was still pretty as ever; black marble with gold lettering, chosen by Peter. But after seeing all of the kerbed memorials, it looked almost plain. The grave was still covered in flowers and candles and trinkets - Loki and Tony knew they weren’t the only people who still visited regularly - but underneath all of that, it was just a mound of grass. Loki took the flowers in his arms from the cellophane and set them in the grave flower vases. He stood up again, taking Tony’s hand once more. 

-

It felt strange, being there on the seventh without Peter. All three of them visited often, sometimes alone, sometimes together, whenever they felt they should or whenever they felt they needed or wanted to. Peter always brought flowers. Tony often wrote a letter and, when visiting alone, would sit and read it out loud. Loki often went empty-handed, but he’d sit on the path at the foot of the grave, talking, and imagining that maybe she was somewhere out there, watching and talking back to him. Sometimes he felt like he could hear her voice and sense her presence. He just wasn’t sure if it was his imagination or not.

But the seventh, that was the day the three of them always went together. They all dressed smartly, they bought an expensive bouquet from the florist Peter favoured, and they went down to visit May’s resting place together. Peter had struggled considerably at the start. He’d start to get funny around the fourth or fifth of the month, and he’d often have some sort of fit or tantrum on the sixth before going all funny and shaky and whiny on the morning of the seventh. 

For a long time he’d hated it. He still went, and he wouldn’t miss it for anything. But every time the seventh popped up on the calendar, he felt sick. Even now, when things were less of a hardship and more of a routine, his mind was thrown back to that fateful day where he’d woken up at the Stark’s, checked his phone and seen it was the seventh of January. He hated thinking of that day, which had started so nice and normal and ended with his entire world crashing down around him. He hated the feeling that he could have done more. He hated remembering being told. He hated hating; remembering how much he hated the look of his room when he got to the Stark’s that night, how he hated the feeling of having lost everything, how he hated feeling so unbearably sick, how he found himself hating himself, hating the world, hating it all. 

A lot of the time he could avoid delving back into the day completely, but not always. But he was lucky, because his parents went through the same loss, and they knew how hard it was for him. They never made him feel bad for struggling.

-

“She deserves better than this” Tony said after a long silence.

“She never should have died”

“I don’t just mean that” Tony said. “We can’t do anything about that. I mean... I want to update this”

“Update it?”

“The grave. All those ones we just looked at are so beautiful and special and lovely. We never really looked into it properly. We should give her one of those. Give her something more than a headstone and grass. We should look into it properly, get it done. Give her a memorial just as special and lovely as she was”

Loki looked at Tony, at the tears in his eyes and the quivering of his lip. Tony kept his eyes on the grave a few moments more, and the turned and threw his arms round Loki, and he started to sob. He didn’t say anything;- he didn’t need to. Loki held Tony tight and closed his eyes, and it was only a matter of seconds before he broke down too. All of it still felt so raw sometimes. Whenever they visited, they wondered what she’d think. What would she think now, when Peter had been turned into a toddler? What would she think if she could see them? Would she be able to tell that they’d been doing their absolute best by him, ever since that night May had been marked DOA? They liked to think she knew. She always left Peter with them if she was going away or something was happening which meant she couldn’t look after him. She even gave them a type of custody agreement, for goodness sake; every Wednesday and every second weekend. They were all happy with that. They knew where they stood. So of course she knew they’d take the best possible care of him, no matter what. She trusted them. She’d be proud of how far Peter had come. She’d be relieved that he was being looked after by people who loved him more than anything else in the world. 

But sometimes, at times like this, none of that reassuring knowledge mattered. Sometimes, all they wanted was to be able to pick up the phone and talk to her. They didn’t always miss her quite so painfully, but the loss was still felt at the back of their minds. On days like today, they just wanted to hug her again. They wanted to hold her and laugh with her and argue over what they were going to do together that day. They’d been such brilliantly close friends (and a little more besides), and that was a hard thing to say goodbye to.

“Why does it hurt more when we’re going through stuff?”

“Because she was always at the other end of the phone to help us through it before” Loki said. “Because she was part of our family”

“I felt so bad for throwing up when I identified the body. All the staff were so nice, saying it wasn’t uncommon, moving me away and getting me a drink and talking to me like they completely understood...” Tony let go of Loki, wiping his eyes on his sleeve. “Peter wanted to see her. Do you remember him shouting and begging and pleading with us, saying he needed to see her? He was absolutely beside himself. He near enough screamed the house down when we said no”

“It would have absolutely killed him” Loki said. “Tony, I don’t know, what you saw that night at the hospital, but considering I know her injuries were incompatible with life, I don’t want to know. But I saw her at the funeral home, after she’d been cleaned and made up and looked after and- and prepared, and I absolutely could not deal with seeing her lying there, looking like herself but knowing she wasn’t really there, and you know that. If I was affected by it the way I was, imagine what it would have done to that little boy”

“I had to say no” Tony said. “I’d seen her at the hospital. I didn’t know they could do so much to make her look... Well. Like she was just sleeping. But even if I had known, I still wouldn’t’ve let him go”

“He said to me once that he was glad we hadn’t let him” Loki said. “Quite a while after everything, he said he didn’t think he would have been able to deal with it. He’s not sore about us saying no. He thanks us, in a way”

“He... He absolutely fell apart that year and we just watched. We watched him break, and we did so much wrong. We shouted at him. We sent him to school way too early and we know how that ended. We didn’t address the PTSD until he was at St Hendrick’s. We should’ve forced him into counselling straight away”

“We were grieving, Tony. We were trying to deal with our own grief while also suddenly having him full time, and while trying to juggle the rest of our lives too. We didn’t know how best to deal with his trauma, and losing May was definitely at the forefront of our minds. Neither of us were in a position to turn around and decide that what was wrong with Peter was more than grief, and we certainly wouldn’t have known what to do about it then either”

“He stopped speaking. I got cross at him for that for such a long time. I made him cry at work events because of the way I spoke to him and refused to understand the condition when he couldn’t talk to people. I shouldn’t’ve taken him to work events anyway; he was far too fragile”

“Maybe” Loki said. “We’re both at fault, but we did the best we could under the circumstances. I made mistakes too. The way I treated him when I found out he’d been skiving from that first school, that wasn’t great, especially when we found out why he’d done it. The way I treated him that day he ran away to the airport and tried to go to England was even worse. I talked to him about it months later and he said he’d never been so scared of me before or since. He said it was like I’d turned into a completely different person, someone he didn’t know. He said he thought I was going to injure him... And then there’s my sabbatical. I went for the right reasons, but I should have told you first, and I shouldn’t have walked out and left him alone in the house the way I did”

“Those few months while you were away were some of the hardest in my life. I did things I regretted in that time too” Tony swallowed hard. “That year was horrendous for all of us. We all did stupid, reckless things, and we all hurt each other and made some pretty catastrophic errors. But we got through it, didn’t we? We made amends. We forgave each other and we got help and we’ve worked through it. But, you know, despite all of that, we always had something going for us, didn’t we?”

“And what was that?”

“We always loved each other. We didn’t always like each other, but we always loved each other”

Loki put an arm round Tony’s shoulders. They looked at May’s grave, and drops of water started falling from the sky. At first it was just spitting, but it soon came down heavily. They listened to the sound of the rain against the pavement and the leaves of the trees. They listened to the thunder that began to rumble above them. They swallowed, and rested their heads together.

“We have a son, who can and will crawl into our beds when he’s scared during the night. He’ll climb onto our laps for a cuddle when he’s sad. He’ll come crying to us when something bad happens, and he’ll tell us all about it. Our son trusts us, and he loves us, and he knows that we love him too” Loki said. “He knows we’re not perfect, but I think, like us, he knows that all of our triumphs have far outweighed our mistakes. I know we’ve been through a lot together, but when you take those away, we’re happy. All of us. We’re a happy family. Despite everything”

“...A couple of months ago he came into the study. You know he’s not a fan of the study”

“He says the dark wood makes him feel unnerved”

“Right. Well, he came into the study, and he was all teary-eyed. And I was like, what’s the matter, darling? And he came and crawled onto my lap and cuddled into me and said, he said he wasn’t crying because he was sad. He said he was crying because he was happy. And I asked him why, and he said; ‘because you’re my dad’” 

Loki took a deep, shaky breath. “He’s not what we’re going home to”

“I know” Tony closed his eyes for a moment. “We’ve got a toddler to go home to. He won’t be a toddler forever though. Your brother’s gonna make sure that reversal gun gets sorted”

“He’s a sweet little toddler. He’s so cute and lovely and funny and happy. I really do love him, Tony”

“I do too. He’s brilliant, but... We adopted a teenager”

“It’s going to be hard letting little Peter go”

“We’ll get normal Peter back. The Peter he’s supposed to be: big Peter, teenage Peter” Tony said. “We’ll get him back... We’ll still remember little Peter, though. We’ve got the memories, and the pictures”

“And all of his things”

Tony put an arm round Loki’s waist. “May would laugh at us. Especially me. She’d say surely the great Tony ‘Iron Man’ Stark could deal with watching Spongebob and making up juice bottles for a few weeks”

“The school rang me on Monday” Loki said.

“Yeah?”

“They know what’s going on, obviously. They said they’re happy to offer Peter a place in the nursery at their sister school while he’s a toddler”

“Oh” Tony said. “What did you say?”

“I said thank you, but we’re not interested”

Tony held him tighter. “Good”

*

#my writing #fanfiction #mcu fanfiction #marvel fanfiction #frostiron #irondad and spiderson

[officialthiamlibrary]

Welcome to another profile on Behind the Screens, giving you personal insight on who your favorite creators are and what they do when they aren’t wowing you with their creative ability.

This week, I’m excited to bring to you our first artist, Dalyane, or Da-Smiley99. Although, in her case, a more appropriate title would be jack-of-all-trades. As our resident fic writer, song-inspired pic spam creator, and incorrect quote aficionado, she shares her inspiration behind incorrect quotes, her writing persona, her meta-author plans to dictate Thiam’s relationship, and much more! Take a look :)

So, Dalyane, let’s ease our way into things. Tell us about yourself. The catch: the word count should be equal to or less than the number of letters in your two favorite Teen Wolf characters’ name. 

Stiles Stilinski + Theodore Raeken = 25 : My name’s Dalyane, I’m a ray of sunshine in human form. What I want the most is to make people happy with what I do.

And, how did you find the Thiam pack? What about Theo x Liam drew you in?

To be honest, I don’t have the slightest idea. It just came smoothly to me. When I saw Theo and Liam interacting, I was just drawn into it. I was drawn by the silent conversations in their eyes, every word that came out of their mouths that sometimes meant something else or something they haven’t said, their mutual violence towards each other. (I absolutely hate violence, but I don’t know why I’m deeply hypnotized by their banter and their complicated Like/Hate relationship). 

I’m like the most oblivious person ever, I wouldn’t even know if somebody is hitting on me, but there’s something romance-worthy (Is that even a word?) about their complicated relationship that drew me in the Thiam fandom. 

Not mentioning Theo’s past, Liam eventually learned to trust him at some point even if he was still a little hostile towards Theo. A little part of himself learned to forgive him, so he could fight alongside him. In the entire sixth season, I felt like they developed a whole new relationship based on building trust. Apart, Liam and Theo are quite strong alone, but together they cooperate, fight and act like they were a “whole”. Liam may not trust Theo yet, but I felt like his body, his own being told the opposite. I was extremely glad to see their relationship grow with their characters. So long story short, I just basically just dived into it. And it’s without a damn shame that I can say that I don’t even regret liking them together. And it’s also not because of the amazing, beautiful and breathtaking gifsets on Tumblr...Not at all.

Yes!! That sums up their relationship perfectly and worded so well. Let’s keep that going for a moment. Say this was a ‘Stranger Than Fiction’ situation and you could alter their relationship, their lives with your writing. How would they live through the following scenarios:

a. Their First Date: 

Oh, they would know for sure they’re on a date, even if it’s not a date. Theo and Liam would hear my annoying voice every five minutes. Like Liam would ask Theo to hang out at his place, it’s just two dudes hanging out, nothing extraordinary really. But I would still break the nice atmosphere by saying random things that comes from their heads. Like -Wow, Theo’s ass looks great in those Jeans, Liam thought- or -Had Liam’s lips always been that pink?- and God, they would be as red as tomatoes. Awkward much.

b. Their child’s first boyfriend/girlfriend

Theo would absolutely refuse to admit or say out loud that he doesn’t like his child’s significant other. It would hurt his pride, but he doesn’t want to hurt his small bean and his husband, Liam. Of course it’s my job! Theo would be outraged, but it would be so worth it.

c. Their first conflict as an official couple

Because of me, their fight would last for 5 minutes maximum. They would be in a situation where Theo would get jealous because he thought some random guy was flirting with Liam, when in fact he was just being super friendly. So Theo was being an asshole out of jealousy. Liam would start getting angry at him, asking what was his problem but Theo wouldn’t respond. I would just whisper in the air: “Hey, he was jealous you dummy.“ Then they would apologize to each other, followed quickly by a make out session. Yeah, you’re welcome Thiam. 

Haha, honestly, they’d be lucky to have you running the show! Piggy-backing off the craziness you’d put them through, sometimes, characters  find themselves in situations they aren’t sure they can get out of. In your life, is there a time you found yourself in a situation like that and what did you do?

Oh god. Almost nothing happened to me in my life. But I will share this particularly embarrassing moment of me. So one day I was going to my high school, I was inside the school bus. But suddenly the bus stopped at my old middle school, then our chauffeur turned to us saying our high school was closed because of the snow. 

So we went inside the middle school to call our parents so they can pick us up. But that day my mom was working, so she wasn’t available. My grandma didn’t pick up the phone either. So I was like “I can’t stay here anyway, what should I do?” Then my stupid old self just got out of the school, walking all the way to my home. Yeah, I was pretty stupid back then.

 I was freezing and couldn’t see a damn thing in front of me because I was in the middle of a snowstorm. A random guy slowed his car close to me and asked me if I want to get in. Then I remembered what my mom said about getting in a car with a stranger, Oh hell no. I lied saying I was close to home, so he would leave me alone. It worked. 

30 minutes later I think, another car stopped close to me and a woman speaks to me, “Get in, I won’t let you freeze on the road.” I hesitated, obviously. Until I saw my friend in the passenger seat. Finally, I got home safely! I was incredibly embarrassed and horrified; I felt like an idiot. I never thought that I would get home. Holy molly, that was terrifying. When my mom asked why I was home early, I lied to her saying that the chauffeur brought all the students home in the morning. Well, I’ll never ever do that again.

Oh my goodness! Girl, I’m glad you got home ok and didn’t freeze to death! Before we jump into your work, who would be on your ultimate paintball/laser tag team. Any five characters from Teen Wolf. Also, Why?

I would have Stiles on my team, because he’s extremely smart and no doubt he would make up an excellent strategy on the field. I would have Theo, he’s also smart, but he’s a bit reckless and surely takes risks a lot so it can come in handy. I would have Malia, she’s a badass and would dominate the field with some girl power! (You go girl!) I would have Corey, he’s very subtle, doesn’t make a sound and he definitely would blend in the background and that is definitely handy for sure. What a great sneaky sniper. 

For the last member of my team, I would take Mason, he will probably use his charm and his charisma to lure the opposite team’s members. Or just make jokes and references to his favorite Tv shows. That kinda does the job too.

Perfect! And now your work! *Rubbing my hands together in anticipation*

You do a little bit of it all when it comes to creating for Thiam: fanfiction, fanart, edits, incorrect quotes. Which would you say is your favorite art form? And how do you balance creating them all? 

I guess my favorite form of art is writing. I had a talent for writing since I was a kid. I could express myself better on paper than with my voice. Many people had a hard time to believe that everything I wrote came from my mind, because I can’t express myself properly when I talk. For me, writing is an art and fanfics are masterpieces. Writing has been a way for me to escape the real world, my problems and my worries. Writing is a way for me to talk indirectly to readers and expressing my feelings to them through my writing. 

It’s kinda hard to balance my creativity in my posts, because I always do something different. If I see something I like on Tumblr, Instagram or Twitter, I tried to include it in them. I always try to get better. I’m trying to find my own style and keep it. I’m saying it again, I want to make people happy with what I do and when I get positive comments on my works, that makes me want to get  better. A part of me does all of this for my followers, to put a smile on their faces or make them laugh. Seeing them happy makes me happy too.

And, if your process was a person, describe them. What do they do? Wear? Listen to?

Well, she’s pretty thoughtful. She always paces back and forth in her room, trying to find a title to her work. She bases her work mostly on the title, that is most of the time based on a song. She’s always in PJ’s and some good old crocs. She just sit on her bed, listening to her favorite songs, TV shows, movies or her favorite YouTubers. She’s a little lazy girl, I guess. I can’t really blame her, it’s how she is. :)

What would you say is both your (and her) Writing Kryptonite, haha? How do you fight it?

It’s really strange, but I can’t write anything if I don’t listen to some music. Music always has been the source of my imagination, I just didn’t realize it until a few months ago. If I don’t have my phone and headphones on me, I can’t do anything. I need music to write. Depending to the meaning, the lyrics and the beat of the songs I listen to, my works change. If I write something sad, I listen to songs about heartbreak, death, breakups, etc. If I write something fluffy and happy, I will listen to songs about happy endings, falling in love, weddings,etc. 

When I know exactly what to write (theme, feeling expressed in it and other minimal things), I know instantly what song to listen to. Every time there’s music in my ears, I get in my own writing world and my hands just start tapping on my keyboard on their own. This is pretty unique, huh? Music gets me really emotional and I can’t do anything about it. It’s very strange. Since Music is the source of my creativity and imagination, it’s very rare that I have writer’s block.                  

To get rid of my writer’s block, I simply sit back on my couch and close my eyes, listening to some soft music. I take a break, because I can’t write something for a whole day, I would get a huge migraine. I would just relax and let everything come to me.

Your love for writing with music. Is that what inspires your song edits, like this one? What makes a song shout Thiam to you? How do you choose images that embody both the song, their relationship, and your writing for it?

I always choose a song that reflects their complicated relationship and what they’ve been through. I choose songs that are very specific for them, that express their banter, their problems and their backstories. Depending on the songs I choose for my edits, the colors, the pictures and themes are different with each one. For example, for a sad song, the colors and pictures of my edits will be darker, the theme of the edit will likely be sadness, sorrow, breakups,etc. For a more happy-go-lucky song, the colors and pictures will be clearer and brighter, and the theme of the edit will be happiness, calmness, comfort, etc. 

Everything I do in my edits will change with the song I choose. I chose pictures very carefully, they have to call to me (my creative style, I mean). When I find something perfect for my edits, I just know it. It’s hard to explain it, but I can feel it in my gut when I got something good. I’m a weird phenomenon.

And, incorrect quotes. How do those come to you too? Are they inspired by things you see of hear in everyday life? 

Most of them are inspired by my favorite YouTubers: Game Grumps. It’s a gaming channel, where two grown men play some video games while sassing each other, telling semi-bad jokes, swearing 95% of the time and saying perfect incorrect quotes material. Most of them came from the mouth of these awesome guys. Is it the time when I say you should check their channel out? Yeah, go check it, please. :)

Oh wow, one of my roommates watches their channel religiously!! I’ll have to join her sometimes, when I hear them blaring from her room haha. You’ve recently started a new multi-chapter fic, Catch & Release. Can you give us a quick summary, for anyone unfamiliar. 

The story happens one year after the events of season 6. A mysterious girl come knocking on Liam and Theo’s door, seeking their help. Her name is Skye Andrews.She’s a true Alpha who’s fighting against an hostile pack that plans to take Canada. When they saw that she wasn’t a threat and saying the truth, Liam and Theo accepted to help her, also accepting coming to Canada.

And did something inspire the concept?

I don’t even know. It just weirdly came to me just like that, while I was listening to the song “Catch & Release” by Matt Simons.The story made itself when I listened to the lyrics of the song. Now you know where the title came from.

Finally, you know I have to ask. Are there any spoilers you can slip us? 

Eventually you’ll get to know all of my original characters I included in the story. I can’t give any spoilers, because I still don’t know where this story is going. But here’s something I know for sure: Nolan/Alec and Thiam will be canon at some point in the story, I just don’t know when exactly. But if you want some precise informations, my ask box is always open.

Hahaha, fair enough. I guess we’ll have to read along and see. Ooh--perfect question segway. Bonus Question-if you could read only one author/fanfic writer for a whole year, who would you read? And what story of theirs would you horde?

Without hesitation, I say Captainmintyfresh (@Thiamfresh on Tumblr). I just adore her writing so much. It calls to me and her writing style absolutely hypnotized me. She’s incredibly talented and I just can’t stop reading her works. “Airplanes” is by far her best work. I think everyone should read it; it’s a piece of art, a masterpiece. I’m not even exaggerating. Her writing is truly amazing; it gives me the chills. I really wish I could write like that. She can capture the personality and the dynamic of the characters in the Teen Wolf universe. The way she writes their interactions is truly a treat. Seriously, If I could read her works forever, I would. She’s incredibly talented.

I share that sentiment, wholeheartedly. You’re not alone! Before we wrap, I want to ask about advice because I think it’s amazing when we’re given the opportunity to learn from one another. What’s the best writing/drawing/edit-creating advice you’ve ever gotten? Is there any wisdom you could gift us?

I didn’t get any advice in writing, but I would like to give some. If you are struggling with your writing, just take a breath and lean back to look at your work. If nothing comes out, it’s useless to work endlessly and working your brains out. Just take a break and work on it later. There’s no need to be rushed, take the time you need. Writing can be hard and demands a lot of concentration and creativity. Just take the time you need, take breaks and write everything you like. You are the creator of your story.

What’s next for you? Both in life and the creation world?

Well, I’m taking a year off of college. It was becoming too much for my brain to handle so much anxiety every day. In this year, I will eventually think about where I want to go and what I want to do. Maybe it will shorten my time for writing, but I want to do the most I can. I guess there’s nothing next in the creating segment, I’m just going to continue writing and drawing. But there’s nothing huge specifically.  

Any creating is always a perfect amount, so I’m sending you all the luck and inspiration juice in the world! Anything else you’d like to share, in general. The floor is all yours! :)

This concerns anybody reading this. I’m saying this for the third time now, but I’m writing fanfictions, doing edits, drawing fanarts and writing some incorrect quotes for you (all of you). I’m doing this to bring a smile on your faces, make you laugh and make you feel so many different emotions with my work. Seeing you guys happy, makes me incredibly happy. On everything that I do, don’t be shy and comment on my works. If you like my writing style, if you like how I make aesthetics, if you like my incorrect quotes or just quotes in general and if you like my fanarts, go ahead and tell me about those things. I probably won’t respond, because I have a social life outside of Tumblr and I’m actually pretty busy.I want to get better not just for myself, but for all of you. I don’t want to let anybody down and I don’t want to disappoint anybody. I really hope that I meet your expectations. I love each one of you (I’m definitely not crying right now).

Awww! And so with that, BTS presents Dalyane, Da-Smiley99! As always, you can keep the conversation going; respond to any of her thoughts, ask more questions, send a prompt, or simply swing by for a chat with Dalyane anytime. To quote her, she would be “absolutely thrilled” to receive your thoughts! If you’d like to dive into her works, check out both her AO3 and Tumblr.

Tumblr: Da-smiley99

AO3: Dasmiley99

Ask Box: Da-Smiley ask

A huge thank you to her for being so excited about our chat and sharing us piece of her life with us! 

Have a Thiam Creator you fan over, from any platform (AO3, Tumblr, Wattpad, Instagram, FFN, etc). Definitely drop us their names. Bonus points if you include any questions you’re dying to ask them. 

Likewise, if you as the creator, would like to be a part of the Behind the Screens series, give us a shout too! We’d love to get to know you, as well.

Mic drop!

#thiam #behind the screens #teen wolf #da-smiley99 #officialthiamlibrary

[throw-books-around-like-con-blog]

Human Teacher – Marsha Hackett, teacher at Jackson High School “The Fault in Our Stars” by John Green, published in 2012

I am embarrassed to admit … The Fault in Our Stars is the very first John Green book I have read. I have seen the movie and I have also seen his movie “Paper Towns,” which is based on another book he wrote, but this is the first book of his that I have read. One might be embarrassed to admit this detail because John Green is a global phenomenon; his books have sold millions and I know so many people who read his books in high school. I was always curious about the fandom and popularity of John Green books, but chose to avoid that curiosity because I am not a big fan of love stories, which is the primary focus in most of his books. Rather than pick up a John Green book, I chose to read a science fiction novel like The Hunger Games or Divergent. I have to say, while I purposely avoided John Green books for years, I am thankful that a teacher recommended I read “The Fault in Our Stars” for my semester blog project.

The teacher who recommended the book to me is actually my best friend’s mom. I have known Mrs. Hackett since I was in 7th grade, and let me tell you, she is the last person I would have expected to suggest this book to me. However, I figured, if she liked it, then it must be a good book.

After reading this book, I understand why she recommended it to me and I especially understand why millions of people are obsessed with John Green books: This book was INCREDIBLE.

The Fault in Our Stars is a fictional love story about a girl named Hazel and a boy named Augustus. Hazel has been fighting Stage IV thyroid cancer since she was 13 years old and Augustus is a survivor of osteosarcoma. They meet for the first time at a cancer support group and their love progresses throughout the story. This is a novel about first love, true love, happiness, sadness, sickness, pain, heartbreak, and hope.

Hazel and Augustus are an unlikely couple as Hazel is very blunt, outspoken, sarcastic, and has a habit of keeping people out of her world due to the fact that she is a “grenade.” She said “I’m like. Like. I’m like a grenade, Mom. I’m a grenade and at some point I’m going to blow up and I would like to minimize the casualties, okay?” (Green 99). She is also obsessed with the book An Imperial Affliction, with crediting the author as her “Third best friend” (Green 13). Augustus is a character himself, a character who “Fear[s] earthly oblivion. The oblivious fear is something else, fear that I won’t be able to give anything in exchange for my life. If you don’t live a life in service of a greater good, you’ve gotta at least die a death in service of a greater good, you know? Everyone wants to lead an extraordinary life” (Green 168-169). Augustus is a typical 17-year-old boy who loves video games and The Price of Dawn, a science fiction novel referenced throughout the book; he believes in romantic gestures and also insists on calling Hazel by her first and middle name (Hazel Grace) throughout the book.

I really enjoyed the way Green wrote this book. He wrote it in a way that the reader could make personal connections with the characters. When Augustus “Lit up like a Christmas tree” (Green 214) (referencing the fact that his cancer was back), I as a reader felt truly sorry for him and it absolutely broke my heart when him and Hazel broke down crying because “It’s just so goddamned unfair” (Green 214). When Isaac (Augustus’ best friend) had to get his lone-standing eye removed to prevent future cancer, I felt so sad that he would never be able to see his beloved video games ever again, and it also made me appreciate the fact that I have eyes and that I can maneuver myself around and live independently, whereas Isaac would always need assistance. Every time something sad would happen in this book, I felt so sorry for the characters, and although the characters are fictional and this whole story is fictional, events like these actually happen to people.

One of my favorite parts about this book was the symbolism that took place. My favorite form of symbolism was Augustus’ cigarettes. In one of Hazel and Augustus’ first encounters with one another, Augustus pulled out a pack of cigarettes and put one in his mouth. With him knowing that Hazel could barely breath out of her lungs due to cancer, she was furious. However, he assured her that he wasn’t actually going to smoke the cigarette. “They don’t kill you unless you light them. And I’ve never lit one. It’s a metaphor, see: You put the killing thing right between your teeth, but you don’t give it the power to do it’s killing” (Green 20). Although a metaphor, Augustus’ cigarettes symbolize the fact that he is in control of his own life; something like cigarettes can’t kill him if he doesn’t let it. Throughout a majority of the story, Augustus was in control of his life because he was cancer-free. However, the symbolism of controlling his life by not lighting the cigarettes was almost a form of dramatic irony; page 214 revealed that the cancer was back and it was going to control his life until his death.

Another symbol that also acted as a motif (as well as Augustus’ cigarettes) was Hazel’s oxygen tank and cart. Her oxygen tank and cart, sadly, symbolized weakness, sickness, reliability, and the constant gawking from people. The symbolism is obvious on page 141. As Hazel, Augustus, and Hazel’s mother were in the airport getting ready to depart for Amsterdam, they had to go through airport security, and rather than get searched by hand, Hazel “chose to walk through the metal detector without my cart or my tank or even the plastic nubbins in my nose. Walking through the X-ray machine marked the first time I’d taken a step without oxygen in some months, and it felt pretty amazing to walk unencumbered like that” (Green 141). Hazel usually feels weak due to the fact that she has to rely on her oxygen tank and cart to survive, and while those objects typically symbolize weakness, sickness, and reliability, she felt a sense of strength and power when she went without it for a few moments.

Another thing I enjoyed about this book was the foreshadowing that took place. An example occurred when a quote by Peter Van Houten, author of An Imperial Affliction, was featured on a page before the story even started. This signified the importance the author would play throughout the book. Another instance of foreshadowing took place on page 229 when Hazel said “I never took another picture of him.” Although incredibly sad, due to the fact that it foreshadowed Augustus’ death, I always enjoy when foreshadowing takes place in a book.

The Fault in Our Stars is a depressing book about love and death, to say the least. This book gives any hopeless romantic the hope that they took might find their own Augustus Waters (while hoping that their love story doesn’t have a somber ending). I thoroughly enjoyed this book because it gave me an even bigger appreciation for my life and my health, and also made me realize how lucky we all are to be alive, healthy, and well. This book also showed me, as well as others I assume, that no matter how sick you are, you must continue to have hope and fight on, and you mustn’t ever give up. If Hazel and Augustus can summon the bravery to keep fighting and living their life, so can everyone else.

As I end this post, I leave you with a quote by Peter Van Houten from his book, An Imperial Affliction.

“As the tide washed in, the Dutch Tulip Man faced the ocean: ‘Conjoiner rejoinder poisoner concealer revelator. Look at it, rising up and rising down, taking everything with it.’ ‘What’s that?’ I asked. ‘Water,’ the Dutchman said ‘Well, and time.’”