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#really tired of being happy and then just not being happy for no reason
timkontheunsure · 3 days
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Blitz's solo career?
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Ok so is there an actual reason that Blitz thinks all Goetias are 'all the fuckin' same", and that "royal demons don't give a shit about guys like us"?
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Fizz doesn't have this opinion, even after working with Mammon...
I assumed it was just growing up in a racist system, and having a lifetime of it rule class not caring being reinforced. But what if it's that plus, something that Fizz didn't go through. Something after the Circus but before Loo Loo Land?
Something that affected him enough to be in his bad trip years after. Someone that offered him a career if he slept with them?
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We know he has trauma of being on stage, and ends up in a panic attack when he's forced onto one. Nearly saying when he's last performance was. "Oh, shit! Oh, shit! Oh, shit! Oh, shit! I-I... I can't do this. No, not again. I-I haven't performed since--"
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When the crowd laugh he lights up.
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And at the end of the episode, when they've got back Via all safe, the book and Loona's mostly forgives him; Blitz is still upset at his 'acting career' going up in flames.
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Everyone else is happy to watch the fireworks and he's still grumpy, about a bit part on a very bad human sitcom. There's no career here. So what making him feel bad?
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Blitz doesn't trust Mammon from when they're teenagers, but it's not quite "you royal fucks think you can do this EVERY TIME, like you can just play with our feelings because we're smaller and not as IMPORTANT!"
This looks like a trauma trigger about a royal discarding him for both sex and a job. It is directed at Stolas, but also every Goetia. Like it's not all about what happening here.
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Why does he look angry at Stolas laughing at his jokes? He loves Stolas doing that, so who pretended to laugh at them?
Blitz says all royal are the same, after a very long list of things showing he notices when Stolas cares for him as a person. And Fizz tries sarcasm saying...
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Which gets the biggest eyeroll of 'even Blitz can't be that thick'. So why does Blitz think that make it more fake?
Then Fizz says "They can't all be the same if some have taste, and some wanna fuck you." By inference any royal that wants to sleep with Blitz is one of bad ones.
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And this is the point where he wants to stop talking about his sexlife, and change the subject after being it up in the first place...
They do a lot of foreshadowing in this show to what if this really isn't about Stolas, but past experiences being put onto him.
A royal that he liked, thought liked him back, and screwed over his job when he got tired of him.
If so Blitz might have a bit more to work through than denial, and getting Stolas to unlearn racist behaviours and microaggressions.
Still thinking they'll get there but might be being set up for season 3.
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charlieleclerc16 · 1 day
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Lost and Found*
Summary: Charles and Y/N have been best friends since they were little kids but they lost track of each other over time. When Charles is in town for his home race they finally reunite and their meeting is sweeter than ever.
Pairing: Bestie!Charles x You
Word count: 4.4K
Warnings: Smut, fluff, cute. There might be some unprotected action in there, I'm sorry.
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It's been a very long time since you last saw your best friend. It has been years, which is a shame, but there were reasons. The biggest reason was that he was travelling all over the world for the World Drivers' Championship, and that caused his schedule to be incredibly full. There is also the fact that, because he is rarely home to begin with, you don’t get many chances to see him.
Charles always tries to keep in touch, even with the crazy life he leads. But that might mean only brief texts and the occasional phone call. Sometimes not even those. The last time you heard from him was six months ago when he called to ask how your family was doing. He sounded so tired but excited. You talked for an hour, and it was almost like the last years hadn't happened.
With the new season starting up and him being back on the road, you decided to contact Pascale and see if she could get you in for the Monaco GP. This is an amazing opportunity for you to finally see your best friend and to surprise him with your presence.
The excitement about race day has been building up inside of you ever since you decided to do this. You know you can't expect much attention from Charles after the race, but you're looking forward to seeing him and getting to see him drive. You haven't seen him in person in two years.
You take a shower and then put on the black top and red high-waisted jeans that you have planned to wear to the grid, gotta support Ferrari. When you get into the kitchen, you realise that you are too nervous and excited to eat, so you settle for a banana. You check the time and are happy to notice that you still have some time left to spare, so you go into the living room and switch on the television.
There are no good shows on, so you switch to the music channels and find one that is showing a rerun of an interview Charles did a couple of years ago. The whole country, how small it may be, always turns into full mayhem when it’s raceweek. You smile as you watch him talk. Even after all these years, it's still the same Charlie. He's still your Charlie. You feel a pang in your heart when he smiles his cheeky grin at the interviewer, and you realise just how much you miss him.
As if reading your mind, your phone vibrates on the coffee table. You reach for it and see Charles' caller ID on the screen. You pick up and bring the phone to your ear.
"Charles?"
"Hi, baby!" He sounds excited. "Did I call at a good time? Are you busy?"
"No, I'm not. I was just watching TV." She decides to not tell him that she is going to see him in a couple of hours.
"Oh, what are you watching?"
"Um, an interview. It's not important. What are you doing? Shouldn't you be getting ready for the race?"
"I have a free half hour, and I'm hiding, so nobody can find me. I really needed to talk to you, and I couldn't wait anymore."
"Why did you need to talk to me? Is something wrong?"
"No, it's nothing like that. You're coming to the track today, aren't you?"
Your eyes grow wide and your stomach somersaults. How did he know? Did his mother give something away?
"How...how did you know?" You finally manage to say.
"I'm not stupid, Y/N. I know how you talk when you're nervous and when you're not. When I talked to you about my home race last week, your voice didn't sound like usual. You sounded nervous, and it was pretty obvious that you were going." He laughs on the phone.
"Wow, I'm not very subtle, am I?" You feel stupid.
"You really aren't." His voice sounds warm and inviting, and you feel a shiver running down your spine.
"So, why did you want to call me, if it wasn't to tell me not to come?"
"Oh, I would never tell you not to come. I really want you to be there today."
"But… Don’t you have a very busy schedule? You probably won't even have time to see me."
"Don't worry, baby. I will definitely see you. If I don't, you should find the backstage area and tell them to let you in. I already told the security team your name. They'll let you in."
"Really? Charles, you're crazy. You have a race to prepare for. You shouldn't let random fans into your private space."
"But you're not a random fan. You're Y/N."
"I'm glad that you still think of me like that, even though we haven't seen each other in a while."
"What do you mean?" Charles sounds confused. "Of course, I still think of you as my best friend. Nothing can change that."
You feel a lump forming in your throat. You don't want to cry, not now. Charles means the world to you, and he will never know. You are not the kind of girl who confesses her love to crushes, not even when they are her best friends.
"Y/N, are you still there?"
"Yeah, I'm still here. I was just thinking about something."
"Well, stop thinking. We're going to see each other in a couple of hours." He is smiling; you can hear it in his voice.
***
When you enter the city centre, the excitement inside of you is unbearable. The atmosphere is incredible, and the streets are so crowded and so full of life and happiness. Everyone is happy to be here, and so are you.
You find your way to the Paddock Club, which thankfully Pascale got you an access pass to because you would’ve never been able to afford this. As you wait for the race to start, you keep looking around trying to find familiar faces and wondering what Charles is doing right now.
The sun was shining brilliantly over Monte Carlo, its rays dancing off the azure waters of the Mediterranean as one of the most anticipated events of the year, the Monaco Grand Prix, is about to begin. Your heart is racing almost as fast as the cars that would soon tear through the narrow, winding streets.
Charles was starting from P1. Your Charles, the pride of Monaco. His Ferrari sat poised and ready, a crimson beast waiting to be unleashed. As you watch the big screen showing the last preparations for the race, you can’t help but feel a swell of emotion. You are already so proud of him.
Soon the camera pans over the cars lined up at the starting line showing the drivers walking to their vehicles. He climbs into the car, and the mechanics begin their final checks. The roar of the engines filled the air, a symphony of power and precision. The grid is set, and the lights above the starting line begin their countdown.
Red. Red. Red. Green.
The cars surge forward, a blur of colour and sound. Charles holds his position, deftly navigating the treacherous streets with the skill and grace of a dancer. Every corner, every straight, he is in perfect harmony with his car.
From the paddock, you watch every moment with bated breath. Your fingers are crossed, your heart lodged in your throat. Lap after lap, he maintains his lead, his driving a masterclass of control and speed. The crowds roar, the tension palpable as the race unfolds.
As the laps dwindle down, you find yourself almost unable to watch. He is so close, so close to his biggest dream. The pit stops have gone flawlessly, the strategy executed to perfection. But Monaco was a track where anything can happen, and the slightest mistake can spell disaster.
Then, with a grace that seems almost effortless, Charles navigates the final corner and speeds down the straight towards the finish line. The checkered flag waves and the crowd erupts into a frenzy. He has done it. He won the Monaco Grand Prix.
Tears of joy stream down your face as you watch him cross the finish line, arms raised in triumph. The team explodes into celebration around you, but all you can see is Charles. He climbs out of the car, drenched in sweat and triumph, and your eyes meet across the chaos.
His gaze pierces through you, sending a shiver down your spine. And then, he smiles. That dazzling smile that has captured the hearts of millions. And in that moment, you know that your heart belongs to him, forever.
***
It's been hours since the race ended. After all the interviews, the podium, the celebration, Charles was finally able to get some free time for himself. His eyes are roaming the room, looking for a familiar face, but he can't find you anywhere. Maybe you left without saying goodbye. He feels disappointed. He wanted to see you and to hug you.
The door opens and someone enters the room. Charles doesn't bother to look up. He is too busy feeling sorry for himself. But then your voice is what catches his attention. "Hi, stranger."
He looks up, and there you are, standing in the doorway. He is not dreaming. You are here, in Monaco, and he has just won the race. Life couldn't get any better than this.
"Hi, Y/N." He stands up and walks towards you.
You are speechless. Seeing him winning the race made you so emotional that you had tears in your eyes. Now, standing in front of him, all those feelings come rushing back. "Congratulations on your win. I'm so proud of you." You say as he pulls you in a tight hug. His strong arms wrap around you, pulling you close. You close your eyes and breathe him in, his familiar scent surrounding you.
"Thank you. I'm so happy that you're here." His voice is muffled against your hair.
You pull back slightly, looking up into his warm, brown eyes. There is something in the way he is looking at you that makes your heart race. You have never felt more alive, more connected, than in this moment. You feel as if he can see into your very soul, and the intensity of his gaze takes your breath away.
"Me too." You say softly, your voice barely a whisper. He leans in closer, his lips just a breath away from yours. Your heart is hammering in your chest, and you feel a shiver run down your spine. You close your eyes and allow yourself to fall into the moment.
Just as you're about to kiss him, he pulls back with a chuckle as if he only now realises that you are in a room full of people. You look around and see his family and the Ferrari employees as well as the security guards who are probably watching the two of you like hawks.
"I'm sorry. I didn't realise..." He begins, his cheeks flushed.
"It's okay." You say, taking a step back and running a hand through your hair. "I didn't realise either."
The room falls silent, and you can't help but wonder if everyone heard your exchange. You feel your face flush, and you turn away, avoiding Charles' gaze.
"We should go somewhere more private." He whispers in your ear, making you blush. You nod and follow him out of the room. The security guards let the two of you pass, and Charles leads you down a quiet hallway. You follow him in silence, your mind racing. You can't believe what just happened.
When you reach a secluded area, Charles turns to face you, a sheepish grin on his face. "I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable back there."
"You didn't. I just...I was surprised."
"Good surprised or bad surprised?" He looks nervous, and it makes you smile.
"Good surprised. Very good."
"I'm glad." He reaches out and takes your hand, his fingers intertwining with yours as you continue to make your way outside. "I've missed you so much, Y/N."
You smile up at him, feeling your heart swell with emotion. "I've missed you too, Charlie. More than you can imagine."
As you step out into the warm Monaco air, you can't help but think how lucky you are to be here, with him. He is the best friend anyone could ever have, and you feel honoured that he considers you his best friend. You squeeze his hand, and he squeezes yours in return. You know that, whatever happens next, you will always have each other.
Charles brings the two of you to a halt next to where his bicycle is stalled. "I totally forgot I came here by bike." He says, shaking his head. "Do you wanna come with me, or do you prefer to take a taxi?"
"No, no. I'll come with you." You don't want to spend a single minute away from him.
He smiles at you and nods. He climbs on the bike and motions for you to sit on the top tube as his bike doesn't have a rear rack. You hop on the top tube and wrap your arms around his handlebar for balance. "Jesus Christ, this feels dangerous."
"Just trust me." He says, a twinkle in his eye as he closes his arms around you to grab a hold of the handlebars.
"You sure we'll both fit on the bike?" You ask nervously.
"Of course, we'll fit. Come on." He starts pedalling and soon the two of you are zipping through the streets of Monaco, the sun setting in the distance.
You lean against him, feeling the warmth of his body, and you close your eyes. For the first time in years, you feel completely and utterly content. As the two of you ride through the streets of Monaco, his arms basically wrapped around you, you can't help but think that this is what happiness feels like.
"Charlie, where are we going?"
"Home." He says it so casually as if it's obvious that you belong there too.
You stay silent for the rest of the journey. You just want to enjoy the moment, savour the feeling of his body against yours. When you finally arrive at his apartment, the sun has almost disappeared from the horizon, leaving behind a pink and orange sky.
"Here we are." Charles says as he helps you off the bike. You can't help but notice how his hand lingers on yours, the contact sending a shiver down your spine. After a brief loss of contact to lock his bike, his fingers intertwine with yours and he guides you inside the apartment complex.
The elevator ride is silent, but it's not awkward. It's a comfortable silence, the kind you only share with your best friend. When the elevator doors open, Charles leads you down the hallway to his apartment, his hand still holding yours.
When he unlocks the door and ushers you inside, the first thing you notice is how big the apartment is. It's luxurious, just like he is, and you can't help but be a little jealous. He leads you into the kitchen, which is modern and well-equipped. "Make yourself at home. Do you want something to drink?"
"Just some water, please." You say, your mouth suddenly dry. He nods and busies himself at the sink. You take the opportunity to look around, taking in the sleek furniture and artwork adorning the walls.
When Charles returns with the glass of water, he can't help but notice the awe on your face. "What is it?"
"It's just...this place is so fancy. It's amazing."
He smiles, clearly pleased with your reaction. "Well, I'm glad you like it. Maybe I could give you a tour later."
"That would be great." You can't hide the excitement in your voice. You take the glass of water from him and sip it slowly, trying to calm your racing heart.
Charles walks over to the living room and you follow him like a lost puppy. It's when your eyes fall on the black grand piano that you gasp. "Wow, you have a grand piano!"
He turns around, a grin on his face. "Yeah, I love to play the piano. It's a good way to relax after a long day."
"Can you play me something?" You ask, unable to hide your excitement.
"Sure. What do you want me to play?"
"Anything. Surprise me." You say, smiling at him.
He walks over to the piano and sits down on the stool before he pats the empty space beside him. "Come, sit next to me."
You make your way over to him and sit down, feeling a little nervous. He begins to play, his fingers dancing across the keys. The melody is beautiful and melancholic, and it sends a shiver down your spine. You're completely mesmerised by him, by the way his fingers move so gracefully, by the look of concentration on his face.
As the music swells around you, you feel a sense of calmness washing over you. This is what you've been missing, what you've needed all this time. You lean your head on his shoulder and close your eyes, allowing yourself to get lost in the music.
"What is this song called?" You ask, your eyes still closed.
"I don't know." He whispers. "I made it up."
"You're so talented, Charles." You say, unable to hide the admiration in your voice.
He turns his head slightly and his lips brush against your forehead. "Thank you."
You open your eyes and look at him, the emotion in his eyes mirroring your own. You can't help but feel as if the world has stopped spinning and that it's only the two of you in the universe, in this moment.
He leans closer, his lips ghosting over yours. "Y/N, can I kiss you?"
You nod, unable to speak, and he closes the distance between you. The world around you fades into nothingness as his lips brush against yours. It's soft at first, tentative as if testing the waters of this new, uncharted territory. The kiss deepens, becoming more passionate, more urgent. His hands move to your waist, pulling you closer, and you respond in kind, your fingers tangling in his hair.
The taste of him is intoxicating, a blend of familiarity and excitement. You can feel the years of friendship and unspoken longing in every touch, every movement. It's as if the floodgates have finally opened, and all the emotions you had both kept hidden come rushing out.
When you finally pull away, both of you are breathless, your foreheads rest against each other’s. The room is silent except for the sound of your rapid breathing and the faint echo of the last note Charles had played.
"That was..." You begin, searching for the right word.
"Yeah." Charles smiles, a blush rising to his cheeks. "That was incredible."
You laugh softly, leaning into him and resting your head on his shoulder. He wraps his arm around your waist and holds you close, the warmth of his body soothing you. You sit there in silence for a while, enjoying the feeling of being close to each other.
"Hey, are you tired?" he asks.
"No, just relaxed."
"Okay. Well, I have a question for you."
"Ask away."
"Why didn't you ever tell me?"
"Tell you what?"
"That you love me."
Your eyes fly open, and your heart stops. He is looking at you, his expression serious. You swallow hard and try to think of an answer. But your brain doesn't cooperate, and you can't speak.
"W-what are you talking about?" You stutter.
"I'm talking about the fact that you are in love with me."
"No, I'm not. Why would you think that?"
"Because it's obvious."
"Oh."
"You look shocked whenever I flirt with you and after that so happy. It's the same look I have when I'm thinking about you." You can't believe what he is saying. Does he really mean it? Or is he just playing with your emotions? "Why didn't you ever tell me? Because of my job?"
"No, it's not that. I just...I didn't want to ruin our friendship. You're the most important person in my life, and I didn't want to lose you."
"Oh, baby. You will never lose me."
"Promise?"
"Promise." 
He cups your face with his hands and leans in again. Your eyes flutter closed, and his lips touch yours. The kiss is slow and gentle. His lips are soft and taste like mint. You feel a tingle in your stomach, and you can't help but sigh. His tongue darts out and caresses your lips. You open your mouth, and he slips his tongue inside. Your tongues tangle together, and the kiss becomes more passionate. When you finally pull apart again, you are breathing heavily. He smiles and strokes your cheek.
"You are so beautiful, Y/N. You know that, right?"
"Charles..."
"No, it's true. And you deserve to be told how beautiful you are every day."
"Oh, Charles."
He pulls you into his arms and kisses your temple. You lean against his chest and breathe in his scent. It feels so right to be here with him. After all these years, you finally feel like you belong.
"What are you thinking about?" He asks.
"About the fact that I don't wanna go home."
"Who said you have to?"
"What do you mean?"
"Stay with me tonight."
"Really?"
"Yes. Stay the night. I don't want you to leave."
"Okay."
He stands up and takes your hand. You follow him down the hallway and into his bedroom before he sits you down on the bed. He sits down next to you and strokes your cheek. You look into his eyes and see the same desire that you feel. You lean in and kiss him. His lips are warm and soft, and his tongue feels amazing. Your body is tingling, and you can't get enough. You wrap your arms around his neck and deepen the kiss. He pulls you closer and kisses you passionately. Your bodies are pressed together, and you can feel his arousal. You moan and rub your body against his. He breaks the kiss and looks at you. His eyes are dark with lust, and his pupils are dilated.
"Mhm, Y/N. You're driving me crazy." He pulls you into his lap and kisses you again. His hands roam your body, and you arch your back. He slips his hand under your shirt and cups your breast. You gasp and close your eyes. He squeezes your breast and rolls your nipple between his fingers.
"Oh God." You moan.
"Do you like that?"
"Yes. It feels so good."
He keeps massaging your breasts while kissing your neck. You grind your hips against him, and he groans. You can feel his erection, and it turns you on even more. He moves his hand to your other breast and starts massaging it.
He pushes you onto the bed and gets on top of you. His hands move under your shirt, and he pulls it off. You arch your back and expose your breasts. He licks his lips and leans down to kiss your nipples. He sucks on one and flicks his tongue over the other. You moan and dig your nails into his back.
He moves his hand down to your pants and starts undoing the button. He pulls them down, along with your panties, and tosses them aside. He looks at your naked body and smiles.
"You're so beautiful."
He leans down and kisses you. His tongue darts out, and he runs it over your lips. You part your lips and let him inside. He explores your mouth and moans.
"Mhm, I want you."
"Then take me." You say.
He pulls his shirt off and throws it aside. He undoes his pants and pushes them down. He kneels between your legs and looks at you. You can see his erection through his boxers. You bite your lip and reach out. You run your hand over his bulge and feel the heat. He groans and closes his eyes.
"Y/N."
"Yes?"
"I want you so bad."
"Then take me."
He quickly pulls his boxers down before he grabs your hips and pushes you further onto the bed. He lies down on top of you and kisses you. His erection rubs against your core, making you gasp.
"God, you're so wet." He moves his hand between your legs and strokes your clit. You moan and buck your hips. He positions his cock at your entrance and pushes in. You gasp and close your eyes. His cock fills you up completely, and you feel complete.
He starts moving slowly, and you cling to him. He kisses you deeply and groans. He moves faster, and you cry out. You wrap your legs around his waist and arch your back.
"Yes, Charles. Right there. Please."
He pounds into you harder, and you feel yourself approaching the edge. You never had sex that felt this right.
"I'm gonna come."
"Come for me, baby."
You scream his name and climax. Your body trembles, and you shudder. He moans and buries his face in your neck. You feel his release, and he collapses on top of you.
"God, Y/N. That was amazing."
"It was."
He rolls off of you and pulls you into his arms. You snuggle against his chest, and he kisses your forehead.
"So, this is where we've been heading since day one, huh?" You chuckle.
"Well, yeah. I just didn't expect it to take twenty years."
"Yeah, me neither."
"And I also thought we'd be more cautious about it." Charles laughs realising he completely forgot to use a condom.
"I don't know, I just didn't care."
"Yeah, me neither."
You kiss his cheek and rest your head on his chest.
"Charles?"
"Hm?"
"Will we be able to make this work? I mean, with our lives and everything?"
"We'll figure it out. I'm not letting you go."
"Good."
You close your eyes and listen to his heartbeat. He is holding you tight, and you can't imagine being anywhere else. You kiss his chest and slowly drift off to sleep in his arms.
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ihni · 3 days
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What if ...
... Hopper and Neil Hargrove had been in the army together?
I don't know anything about the army and all I know is that the war at least Hopper went to was the one in Vietnam, but let's play with the thought that the two of them were there together. And did NOT get along, like at ALL; Hopper thought Neil was deceitful and untrustworthy, too proud and manipulative. Overestimating his own importance and competence, and too happy to cause pain in others.
They both survived the war and went back to their own lives, only like 20 years later or so, the Hargroves show up in Hawkins and Hopper meets Neil Hargrove again.
Despite telling himself that they're older now; that they're adults who have had time to grow into themselves, Hopper STILL doesn't like Neil. Like, his skin is crawling when he sees the man, even after all these years. But it's not like he has a good reason to dislike him now; outwardly, Neil Hargrove seems to be just a normal family man, setting down in Hawkins with his family. No one else has had any complaints. And either way, Hopper can't explain it, it's just a feeling. He just doesn't LIKE him.
And the thing is, that the guy has KIDS now, too. Or - as Hopper learns, as soon as he gets the documents he pulled from California - a son, at least (the girl being Neil Hargrove's new wife's kid). And by the file that Hopper has to pull some strings to get his hands on, the kid is shaping up to be a bad seed, just like his dad. Reports on fights, trespassing, shoplifting, underage drinking, reckless driving.
Hopper doesn't want that kind of bad influence in his town. So what, if he wants to nip it in the bud? So what, if he pulls the kid over as soon as he gets the chance, just to get a feel of him? The kid is tense, obviously hiding something, and speaking so respectfully that it borders on sarcasm - strike that, it's definitely sarcasm.
So what, if Hopper feels the need to put the fear of god into the kid? He's here, and his father is not - Hopper can't touch Neil, who never officially puts a toe out of line, but a teenager with a bad attitude? It's basically Hopper's JOB to do something about that.
So he goes hard on the kid. Tells himself it's for the kid's own good; keeping him on the straight and narrow and teach him what's right and what's wrong. And hey, if he gets to bring the kid home to the Hargrove doorstep sometimes and look Neil Hargrove in the eye while he lets him know what his son has done now (Not so perfect now, are you Hargrove?), well, then that's just a bonus. Perks of being the Chief of Police.
It becomes personal, in the way that he will take any chance to gte on the kid's case for SOMETHING. But also the opposite of personal, because the kid - Billy - isn't really a person in his own right in Hopper's eyes. He's just an angry kid. Neil Junior. A chip of the Hargrove block. He is simply a means to an end. The best way to get to Neil in a way that doesn't seem unreasonable, or petty, in the eyes of everyone else.
And of course, I want the Moment of Realization. I don't know where or when; maybe Hopper stumbles over Billy's car parked out at the Quarry, or maybe he nabs him after a party, or maybe he sees him out walking by the side of the road late one night and pulls up next to him.
And maybe that's the time when Billy has had ENOUGH. When he either gets angry and starts yelling, 'What do you have against me, man?? What have I ever done to you?", or maybe he tries to run because he can't do this right now, or maybe it's a Bad Night and he's tired and terrified and he breaks down crying (but tries to hide it).
Maybe it's all three.
And, I don't know, but maybe Billy's hurt and wincing and Hopper notices, and maybe when Billy refuses Hopper (not very gently) demands to see, and -
Maybe there are bruises. Maybe there's a burn scar somewhere on Billy where he couldn't have put it himself (like between his shoulder blades), the one you get from a red-hot lighter. A mark that Hopper remembers from his time in the the army, from when a buddy of his made a bet with Neil and lost, and Neil let his lighter burn for a long time and then pressed the hot metal against the guy's back. That too scarred, and it looked just like this.
And maybe that's when Hopper lets his memories boil over, and his voice is rough when he asks what happened, who did that, and maybe that's when Billy mutters something about Hopper and Neil being army buddies and Hopper doesn't have to worry, Billy isn't a snitch, he can keep his mouth shut.
And that's when things slot into place in Hopper's brain, and he realizes that the kid is just a KID, that the anger comes from hopelessness, that the attitude is a mask to hide his fear. Because even now, he's cowering in Hopper's grip - but still keeping eye contact, back straight, hands to the side. Learned behaviour.
And that's when Hopper realizes he has Fucked Up.
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inurnctdreams · 1 day
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00:00 - l.dh
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haechan x gn!reader
genre: fluff, established relationship, drabble
warnings: swearing, suggestive, mentions of sex, pet-names (baby, hyuckie)
wc: 0.7k
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“happy birthday dear hyuckie, happy birthday to you!”
“hi baby, thank you.” donghyuck’s voice is quiet and slightly raspy. nothing you haven’t heard multiple times before, but not what you’d expected when you’d called your boyfriend at exactly midnight in his current time zone.
“did… did i wake you up?” you frown, and your voice must betray your disbelief if his cute little chuckles over the line are anything to go by.
“maybe, i fell asleep like twenty minutes after i ate dinner.”
“were the guys not with you?” you pout. you’d at least taken some comfort in the fact that he’s surrounded by the rest of the dreamies for the start of his birthday if you can’t be there.
“they’re here.” he says. “our intention was to stay up.”
“and you all fell asleep? that’s actually really fucking funny.” you can’t help the giggles that escape you at the thought of all seven of them crowding in one hotel room to see donghyuck’s birthday in, only to not make it to midnight.
“yeah, i guess we were all pretty tired.”
“wait, does that mean i still got to be the first person to say it?!” you say excitedly. it’s not yet his birthday where you are, but you’d be damned if you were gonna let a silly thing like time zones come between you and making sure your boyfriend started off his day showered in love, albeit virtual.
“uh-huh.” he smiles, leaving out the fact that he’d been planning on answering your call before anyone else could wish him happy birthday anyway. you’d been so cutely adamant that distance wouldn’t stop you from being the first. “i miss you so much.” you almost don’t hear the whisper. if you didn’t know him so well, you’d chalk the voice crack up to him only just waking up.
“i miss you too, baby. twenty-one hours.” you let yourselves sit with the bittersweet feeling for a moment. tears begin to form in your own eyes but you blink them away. “i cannot wait to give you your presents, i think i’ve outdone myself this year!”
“all i need is you.” he elongates the vowels in ‘you’, trying to match your cheery tone.
“ew, stop being so greasy! plus, you love presents and i’m still mad my master plan to have them sent to you was ruined.”
“management did have a point about the shipping time issues, plus this way you can see me open them properly.” he reasons. “i can’t wait to hug you again.”
“just hug me?” you smirk.
“this was supposed to be a cute, innocent birthday call, not phone sex!” he gasps dramatically, sending you both into another fit of giggles.
“okay, okay.” you relent. “i guess the whole point of birthday sex is to do it in person.”
“tease.”
“we did not need to hear that.” another voice chimes in, clearly muffled and far away.
“why are you even on the phone so late?” mark questions, sounding closer than jaemin had. “oh shit dude, happy birthday!”
“is it already midnight?” jisung’s voice is muffled, and then you hear rustling and yells for the other boys to wake up.
“i’ll let you go, have fun with the boys!” you smile.
“no!” hyuck immediately whines.
“it’s okay baby, have a good morning and let me know when you’re boarding and landing, yeah?”
“fine.” he sighs, and you can hear the pout in his voice. the mental image of him, bedhead and traces of sleep, has you mourning the fact that you can’t squish his cheeks or kiss his forehead. yet, you remind yourself. “i’m gonna cuddle the shit out of you as soon as i get back.”
“i’m holding you to that.” you smile, ignoring the fake gagging sounds in the background.
“get some rest too, i know you have work in the morning.”
“i’ll try.” you knew it would be difficult to settle your restless brain but he was right, you did have work, plus the stuff you’d planned for when he got home that you had managed to keep a surprise. “happy birthday, hyuckie. i love you.”
“i love you too.” you glance down at your phone when the call ends.
twenty-one hours.
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my long ass avery rant that might not make sense but i love her and needed to make this.
a huge rant about my love for avery (i swear im not hating on anyone (except for avery haters... sort of. i respect your opinion but...)) i think the end of my rant makes more sense than the beginning...
IVE MADE A POST ABOUT THIS BUT ILL SAY IT AGAIN. STOP OVERLOOKING AVERY'S TRAUMA. SHE IS SO UNDERRATED AND SUCH A COMPLEX CHARACTER AND I CAN'T STAND PEOPLE IGNORING HER. PEOPLE IN THIS FANDOM BARELY POST ABOUT HER AND IT'S UNBEARABLE (LIKE NO HATE CAUSE I LOVE ALL THE LYRA POSTS BUT HOW ARE PEOPLE POSTING MORE ABOUT A CHARACTER NO ONE KNOWS ABOUT AND NOT AVERY??? LIKE I SAID NOT HATE, I EAT THE LYRA POSTS UP).
she's literally the best character in the series. the brothers don't even come close to her. people who are mad at her for not picking grayson can actually just shove it up their ass bc gray and avery would've never worked out in the long run. avery is a queen and i see people hating on her for so many stupid reasons. not picking gray? giving away the money? being an emily 2.0????????????????????????????? don't even dare compare my queen, my love, my everything to that wretched beast who is now rotting in a coffin underground. some people making reviews on goodreads seriously need to get a life and touch some grass.
as im rereading the main trilogy, i'm writing down quotes from avery so i can make an in depth analysis of her character. it might suck and it will definitely be multiple parts but if no one is gonna acknowledge her trauma, i will. i'm sick and tired of people constantly ranting about grayson and other characters when avery is literally the main character. none of this series would exist if it weren't for avery. the fact that some people are willing to defend their favorite characters when they hurt avery is so so sad to me. like, i love jameson with my entire heart, but treating avery like a puzzle and messing with her self esteem was not cool of him. same goes for grayson and him treating avery like a shitty gold digger who 'hasn't struggled like he has'
i've made posts about this before but i feel the need to make another one. i've seen people defend grayson for treating avery like shit in the first book (some people do it as a joke which is fine but some people are actually serious and it confuses me??). i get that grayson was mad and disappointed that his grand father disinherited him after a lifetime of being told he was going to inherit. his feelings were 100% valid. did he have the right to take it out on avery though? no. not at all. this girl is even more confused that he is and has been nothing but kind to him. him invalidating her feelings and treating her like crap is just so shitty of him. don't get me wrong. he has redeemed himself and i do love him, but seeing people defending him (in a serious way) just gets on my nerves. would you like to be treated the way avery was in tig? i think not.
i'm not as mad about jameson bc 1. he apologized on 'screen' and 2. i don't see people defending him as much as grayson (i don't think i've ever seen a post defending him which is good). i love him too, and what he did was also horrible. i better not ever see a post defending him. his actions are explainable but that doesn't justify them. he really messed with avery's self-esteem, so much as to make her doubt his feelings towards her. the only reason i'm not as mad as with the grayson situation is bc i don't see people defending him as passionately (if at all).
i see this happen in so many fandoms. people gush over the male love interest or the male main character and completely ignore the fmc. the only fandom i don't see this happening in is the folk of the air fandom. jude is getting the attention she deserves which makes me so happy. people willingly ignore what the fmc goes through at the hands of their favorite male character just bc they love them and that is just so absurd to me.
anyways, avery has been through so much fucking trauma it would take me hours to go through it all. she grew up with almost no one by her side, learning how to take care of/protect herself, lost her mother at 15, her best friend moved away a few years before her mom died, her father treated her like dog shit and completely ignore her for her entire life until she inherited the money, she lived in her car, worked her ass off at school and at work to simply keep herself alive, had to deal with drake (although she wasn't his girlfriend, he clearly affected her if she was willing to move into her car bc of him), was almost killed by drake (and, indirectly, skye), sheffield, and eve (and kidnapped by sheffield), it was mentioned on tfg (i believe) that there were other attempts on her life in between thl and tfg, dealt with people constantly belittling her trauma (and her) and saying horrible things about her, she deals with horrible panic attacks after everything she's been through, also deals with crappy self esteem (that was made worse by some of the hawthornes), her privacy was constantly invaded, and, this one is more subtle, but there are instances where she thinks (or does) self harm (like the scene in thl where she's purposefully trying to hurt herself by punching the brick wall blocking off toby's wing. both oren and jameson had to step in to help her). all of these things clearly affected her but barely anyone talks about it? i'm probably missing some things but i just wish she got more attention. she is one of the most forgiving (literally too forgiving. she's willing to forgive people so easily bc she wants to be wanted (but doesn't want to want to be wanted) and have friends)
this girl is much stronger than anyone gives her credit for (the hawthornes would never survive in the 'asylum where they raised her' (whos afraid of little old me by avery is definitely her song)). this rant is probably all over the place and is really long (but definitely won't be the last). thank you for attending my ted talk.
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gumnut-logic · 3 days
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@idontknowreallywhy you reminded me of this. :D
-o-o-o-
Scott was ever so tired, but when John requested he not return Thunderbird One to her hangar, but instead nest her up with Two, he had to do as his brother asked.
John’s reasoning didn’t involve words, just a photo that had Scott hitting the brakes over Tonga and gliding in as quietly as he could.
The fact Virgil was behind him only had him waiting longer as the cargo ship needed to touch down before One could park securely. After all, the whole reason they hid the Thunderbirds like they did on their deserted Island was to protect them from accidentally being seen. There were holographic shields and security networks galore protecting the Island, but ultimately, if a fishing boat either wandered in or needed safety, it was a good idea to keep the Thunderbirds much less than obvious.
In summary, they didn’t tend to leave the sports car on the lawn for the neighbourhood to gawk at.
So instead, Scott set One to hover a respectful distance away while he waited for Two to catch up.
And try not to fall asleep in his pilot’s chair.
Fortunately, Virgil wasn’t as far behind as he could have been and the green behemoth soon appeared on One’s sensors. Scott stared as his younger brother glided in under minimal power and set down with a short spurt of VTOL in a rather impressive manoeuvre. It was the closest to landing silently that Two could probably get.
Scott let One follow almost immediately. She wasn’t as quiet as Two, the fact she had had to hover removing any chance at a glide out of the equation.
In any case, he slipped One in behind her sister and stashed her in the massive hangar so Two could still deploy if necessary and One could as well, albeit a touch slower than usual.
But considering her pilot was a zombie, it wouldn’t matter for another eight hours at least.
Climbing out, he met an equally tired Virgil and they plodded to the elevator together, drowning their exhaustion in the showers, and throwing on pyjamas that Grandma had obviously left out for them.
Scott’s t-shirt had the slogan on the front ‘Born to fly’, which he found appropriate, but the shirt having come from Gordon, the back followed up with ‘Farts in the sky’.
But he was too tired to care right now. Shoving it on and pulling the pants up over aching hips - he really shouldn’t have jumped from that cliff – he stretched to finally get any of the remaining kinks out of his system.
Only to find Virgil wearing a slightly too small t-shirt also obviously of the Gordon purchase pile that pectorally declared, ‘Warning: Do not decaffeinate, may decapitate’.
Well, perhaps, Gordon did have a point there.
Scott sighed. “Want to check on them?”
Virgil’s answer was only an eyebrow, but it clearly declared Scott an idiot for asking such a stupid question.
That ended all energy for future verbalisation and, finishing up, Virgil fell into step beside Scott as he headed off towards the lounge.
Because Allie was in the lounge.
And Allie was injured.
That fact, that entire concept, cut into Scott’s gut like a blunted knife.
John’s frantic yell the week before had aged the commander several years in a matter of seconds. Allie had been up helping a space freighter that had lost power and was in the process of losing orbit along with it. It should have been simple, but some high-speed space trash had collided with the vessel while Alan was out repairing broken electronics.
His suit had been compromised by what was basically a small meteor of human origin and for a bit there it had been damned scary.
But Brains made above average spacesuits and a certain self-healing polymer invented by a smart brother automatically resealed the suit.
Not before the damage to Alan’s leg had been done, however. A gash the length of his calf with both hot and cold burns leaving his leg a mess and their little brother grounded for weeks.
Scott was just happy to have him safe, and those weeks gave Scott the time to process the fact that, ultimately, he would have to let Alan out into space again.
But for now, he was safe at home.
Virgil was on his right when they entered the comms room. There was only one lamp providing illumination beside the moon shining through the rafters, but there was enough light to see Alan and Gordon curled up in what appeared to be the remains of a blanket fort.
Scott stepped quietly, Virgil on his heels.
Both little brothers were asleep, Gordon curled protectively around Allie, snuggled in a pile of pillows and bedclothes. Alan’s bandaged leg stuck out at an angle, but rested on a cushion, his foot sporting a pink fluffy slipper.
But it wasn’t the rather heart-warming sight of his two sleeping brothers that raised his eyebrows.
It was the swarm, a literal school of plushies that surrounded them that had Scott’s eyes bugging out...at least a little.
His brothers were curled up on the floor, but sitting on the couches where International Rescues were decided on and deployed was a literal cornucopia of sea life cuddly toys.
There was a giant prawn as big as Alan perched as if waiting for the holoprojector to activate. Eight octopuses of varying size, lined up in a row, sat beside it, three squid keeping them company.
A whale took up the entirety of one couch all by itself, a plethora of rays and fluffy sharks were piled up in mounds.
A furry red crab was sitting on the steps alongside something else that was white and vaguely bug like. The rest of the floor was covered by starfish, multiple clownfish and a whole variety of other plushie marine organisms including a six-metre-long oarfish that Scott only knew the name of because Gordon had pounded it into his head the day he bought it.
Literally, Gordon had whacked him across the head with it.
Virgil tiptoed into the mess silently on bare feet and there was a flicker of yellow light as he scanned his little brother.
The engineer retreated back to Scott’s side just as quietly, so there was obviously nothing to be concerned about.
John flickered in above the table, obviously on dim projection. He didn’t say anything, just smiling a little down at his brothers before looking up at Scott and Virgil.
Scott absently saluted him and that smile widened just a little before he blinked out again.
There was definitely a good reason why Thunderbird One needed to be parked out back.
Virgil tugged on his arm.
A glance at his brother and Virgil nodded him in the direction of the elevator.
Scott looked back at his two sleeping little brothers once more, a breath releasing through his teeth. Gordon obviously had a sea creature plushie addiction that might require a few questions at a later time, but there was something about the scene that swelled Scott’s heart and part of him wanted to curl up in the pile with them.
Virgil tugged on his arm again and Scott relented, following the engineer from the room.
Nothing much was said between them in the elevator, both caught up in their thoughts. Now they were out of sight of their little brothers, exhaustion once again crept in.
Virgil squeezed Scott’s shoulder as they exited onto the residential level and both of them disappeared into their rooms.
Five minutes later there was a knock at Scott’s door.
Bleary eyed and heart sinking he opened it, only to find Virgil standing there with his arms full of a giant black teddy bear. His brother shoved it at Scott, forcing him to either grab a hold or drop it.
Nothing was said, but Virgil did squeeze his hand before disappearing as abruptly as he had appeared.
Scott was left holding a giant black teddy bear.
It took him a moment, but he shut the door and retreated back into his bedroom.
The bear stared at him.
This was foolish.
But exhaustion continued to gnaw at him and it was with a certain lack of care that found Scott grabbing the bear and curling up in bed around it as the lights finally shut off.
Its fur was ever so soft.
And warm.
As he relaxed into sleep.
-o-o-o-
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lilacjk · 2 days
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𝗽𝗮𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴 : jungkook x reader
𝗴𝗲𝗻𝗿𝗲: yandere, best friend to lover, jungkook is a hotty, angst
𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴: keep a tissue box with you guys
𝗦𝘂𝗺𝗺𝗮𝗿𝘆 : He loves bieng my friend ,but he has girlfriend who he loves ....could this possibly change him from your close friend to a distant person .. And 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘣𝘦 𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘩𝘢𝘣𝘪𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘬𝘪𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘯𝘦𝘤𝘬 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘦𝘦𝘬 𝘤𝘰mfort
𝗣𝗿𝗲𝘃𝗶𝗼𝘂𝘀 :-
𝗔/𝗻: first all i am so sorry, so so so sorry.. I know it took this long but I just had a lot in plate this past time....i hope you enjoy 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀
*************************.
You cried, cried until you slept that night everything was blurry . For days you felt like you were sick nothing was making you happy you didn't wanted to live.
You felt utterly used Ridiculous.
Days after your argument with him. You ran into him at the grocery store .You went there so you could distract yourself after being shut in your apartment for 9 days . You were angry , you clearly were but then again you were naive you wanted to have a civil conversation. If it was to end you wanted to end this all on good terms.
"Hey" you greeted him, nervousness evident in your voice." uhh...hi" He could possibly see dark circles under your eyes it caused an uneasy feeling inside his heart. " Kook... Umm I wa -"
You were cut by an utterly annoying female voice you wished you never heard " jungkookie ... What is she doing here" . This bitch "I thought you said you ended your shitty friendship with her " that was your last straw, you knew she was the one that caused the drift between you and jungkook .
But you never thought he will bring the argument you two had in this way to her.. Clearly stating that he ended... "Oh , so you really wanted to end this up.. That's why you brought that shitty excuse of being busy " You said, not being able to control your emotions further. " Nari.. This is not what I meant.. Listen to me"
He sounded somewhat panicked" Stop stop it " You ran past him out of the store not being able to listen anything moreHe ran after you. He wanted to keep you away from him but reason and things where different than it was looking.. He held your hand turning you so you could face him " Listen to me, nari I don't want you to do anything stupid ".
"Shut up .. I am Fucking stupid… I’m so fucking stupid,” you cried.“Do I really not matter enough to you? All these years of being your best friend and… and this is how you treat me? I know you’re busy, I know work is hard. But college is hard too, people aren’t nice all the time and sometimes I wish I could call you, but I don’t want to bother you at work,” You cried harder
." Nari.. Please " You never screamed at him, you didn’t scream at anybody. You were always so soft, so gentle and tender. You were understanding. But Jungkook hurt you .More than once.And you were tired of it.
“I’m so sick of the person I love more than anything, hurting me like this… if this is how you’re going to treat me then I don’t want to be your friend anymore,” you said, voice breaking.“No, nari , please! Please don’t do this, I love you so much, just things are not straight right now nari, please!” He said, tears in his own eyes.
“Goodbye, Jeon… hope it’s worth it,” you said, turning to leave.Jungkook froze, his cheek stinging but he could hardly feel it over the agonizing pain that flared in his chest.He fell to his knees, tears streaming down his face.He was a fool…And he’d lost you for good
._______________*______________
Months passed and Jungkook stayed far away from you.No texts.No calls.But even after four months apart, you still couldn’t delete his number from your phone.
You couldn't bring yourself enjoying something or even talking to people . Its hard trying to ignore the pain in your heart but it's just there not going anywhere.. No matter matter how much you try you miss him, you really do You were now at the club waiting for your date to come , it weird being there alone.
It's not that you have come here first time but it's first time at club without jungkook. The volume of the music playing at this club was enough to blast your earbuds. The sweaty bodies clinging to your skin and the body odour in the air filling your nose trills was giving you ick. Sure, people are getting wild as time passes by but the dim lights was making it more sensual contrast to the atmosphere.
And there you see those dark eyes you wished you could just ignore staring at you , first at your face then at your outfit. It was the same outfit you suggested to buy just to tease jungkook cause it was way to reveling and he refused saying he don't want some weird guys ogling at you.
But after your fight you just found yourself doing everything that he refused to , out of annoyance just like you are doing now. He knew you didn't know he was there but your dress that was something he knew you did to irk him. “Hey! Y/n?” someone’s voice calling out to you make you came out of your thoughts.
When you focused, you saw your date standing a few foots away from you. You guys goes on a date some days ago, it went well and he suggested you should go on more dates with him, he would love that. He genuinely showed his interest towards you, even confessed to you that he likes you, very much. You were just feeling so sick of jungkook staring at you as if he will eat you . So without even a second thought you hugged your date.
If jungkook was there with his girlfriend enjoying why can't you. Jungkook is pissed, so much so that he goes straight to the seat he was occupying before, where his friends were seated and chugs down two shots in one go. Why is he so mad? He don’t know. Does It bothered him to see you with another man? Yes. Does he want you to stay by his side rather than that pathetic little piece of shit? Abso-fucking-lutely YES!
Jungkook just shrug it off as he took another shot which go straight down his throat, burning it in it’s way down. He doesn’t seem to find the reason why you like this men? Let alone date him? As much as he know, you’re not someone who is interested in these stuffs, so why now? It confuses and bothers him at another level.
What were you going to do now, have drinks with your date, kiss him or.. going to take him to your house and let him take your virginity. Now he found himself getting furious. But was he even getting himself so worked upMinutes passed, and then hour..... You were still with that guy visibly drunk as hell , and ready to go with him to probably fuck... That was the last straw for jungkook-
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𝓘 𝓱𝓸𝓹𝓮 𝓾 𝓮𝓷𝓳𝓸𝔂𝓮𝓭 𝓲𝓽 ... 𝓹𝓵𝓮𝓪𝓼𝓮 𝓯𝓮𝓮𝓵 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓮 𝓽𝓸 𝓵𝓮𝓪𝓿𝓮 𝔂𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝓿𝓲𝓮𝔀𝓼 𝓸𝓷 𝓲𝓽 🦢☁✨
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franollie · 1 day
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Random but i've noticed a lack of anti J*ysteph posts when i looked for them and iydm i want your opinions on why you hate it too /nf
of course! a lot of my issues with it come from it being almost entirely comes from fanon and a lot of inaccuracies in terms of characterization especially on steph’s behalf.
my biggest gripe is that it just doesn’t make sense? the characters that steph is closest to are tim and cass. both of whom would HATE jason so why on earth would steph like him? especially considering jason would have attacked tim at titans tower. like im sorry but steph would hold a grudge against that man for forever
also, every one likes to bring up the so called “parallels” that steph and jason would bond over so lets break them down:
1. They can bond because they both died
This argument pisses me off the most because while jason’s death was memorialized and haunting steph’s was an attempt to get rid of her. and then you also have to address the fact that steph’s death got retconned so…no they can’t bond over dying…because technically steph never died. that being said, she was believed to be dead. so she would be exposed to the difference between how bruce treated her “death” vs how he treated jasons and just from that i think she’d dislike jason
2. they’re both “angry” robins
look im too tired to get into the problem with simplifying a character to one trait or facet of their personality so can we just agree that this one is bullshit? yeah? perfect!
3. grew up in similar homes
nope! jason (from what i’ve read) actually did grow up poor! his father was forced to get involved in crime to provide for his family. we know his home life was rough.
steph didn’t really grow up poor. she by no means grew up rich or even middle class but she lived in the suburbs. she lived semi-comfortably. her father became cluemaster for selfish and bitter reasons, and at the time of steph becoming spoiler, crystal would have been a drug addict (this is not a safe space for crystal brown slander btw). so yeah her childhood home was by no means a happy place either but it is significantly different from jason’s
all in all it just pisses me off when people change aspects of steph’s character and story just so that they can make up things for her to bond with their favorite batboy over, and i hate when people take parts of steph’s story and give them to jason instead of just interacting with steph even more.
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It's 2:18 am over here and I just got done with work. I sat on my chair for a while before getting up and was feeling blank yet there was this heavy feeling on my chest. Now, I might sound delusional (which I am) but the reason why we are so attached to Lovely Runner is that I feel it made all of us feel alive and happy for that time being! It gave us a sense of purpose and the hope that true love awaits us somewhere in the near future. It is the reason that we all crave that form of bond, affection behind all this solitude and peace and chaos and no matter how much we pretend to be fine on our own (maybe we really are) at the end of the day, we crave that bond! That we have someone to go back to, someone to laugh with about silly things, and just a chest to fall asleep to when things get tiring. I get done with work and I sit for a while alone, with nothing to do, and no sense of purpose other than making a living even though I live with my parents, I feel so lonely at times which honestly is a blessing and curse both. I enjoy my solitude but I want to enjoy this with someone!
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I'm sorry I just rambled away but I miss Lovely Runner! I miss being alive like I was while the show was airing 💜💛
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lemotmo · 2 days
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Love reading your takes. I like the way you think. Keep them coming.
Sorry for being negative, but my biggest fear is that since Eddie’s coming arc as been stop twice before, it’s hard to believe it’s still coming. I fear that now they have Bi Buck, they won’t trouble themselves with Eddie.
The way the left Eddie at the end of the season, there is so much they can do with him in the upcoming season. I just hope they take the chance to tell his story which would be so impactful to a lot of people and feels natural to his character. To be honest, I don’t know what else they can do, if they keep throwing woman at him, they have literally shown it’s not working.
You can see the way the tune changed in the middle of the season with those interviews. Is it because they know they got a renewal or they completely put the brake to 'buddie'?
I’ll keep hoping for the best. Tptb, please surprise me. Season 8 will make or break it. I don't see people staying past season 8 if nothing significant happens. I'm pretty sure they know, but why be so afraid. Argh ..
From an Eddie fan that’s fed up with the way they treat his character.
Hey Nonny! Thank you for the lovely compliment. I'm just another fan with some opinions, but I'm glad you like reading about them so much.
No no, I get it. I do. I get the negativity. They were so close to finally going where the story has always been going and then they backed off in the middle of the season. Even the interviews changed. It was clear that Oliver wasn't pleased with the way things were going bts either. And I have the feeling Ryan wasn't happy either. Every single interview he had to think about what he was saying and if it wasn't too much against Buddie, but also not too much pro Buddie. It was hard to see him struggle so much. That's probably why some of these interviews contradicted each other as well.
I really do believe they changed the timeline of the story when they heard about the renewal of the show. They realised they could take their time to give Eddie's coming out story the screentime it deserved. However, now they had to find a way to get Eddie to a place where he would have nothing left. No Chris, no ghost Shannon hanging over his head, no girlfriend... just him and his thoughts. This is the first time in life that Eddie is on his own and it's going to lead to some big time self-reflection.
The consequence of the decision to push the Eddie storyline to season 8 is of course Buck now being stuck in this stale relationship with Tommy.
I have read the interviews Ryan has given after the finale and they do fill me with hope and -dare I say- confidence? The way he talks about Eddie's upcoming struggle and journey very much reads as someone realising they're not as straight as they thought they were. He also stopped talking about Eddie being 'hetero' and started using a lot of gender neutral terms when he talks about a possible future partner for Eddie. So yeah, that is a very good sign to me. A feel like a switch has been flipped now and he is more certain where the story is going.
I agree that it would be the most natural way to explore Eddie's character. He has always been queer-coded, since day one. In my opinion even more than Buck. I was always more convinced of Eddie's queerness than of Buck's. So yeah, it is definitely the best, if not the only, way to go with his character.
And yes, I agree again, if there is no progress in Eddie's storyline and he is once again waylaid, keeping him locked up in that closet, put into another dead relationship with yet another female love interest, put through pain again for no reason whatsoever? A lot of people will give up on the show as a whole. Tired and exhausted that Eddie once again was the victim of bad writing. And if they dare to keep Buck in a relationship with Tommy? They will lose even more viewers.
I myself will retreat back into fanon-land where Buck and Eddie will be happy together forever. I might keep on watching the show from afar, only the parts that interest me. Basically because I love Eddie so much and I only want the best for him. I also love all the other characters and I want to see what happens to them. So I don't think I could give up on the show completely.
However, I really don't think it will have to come to that. I don't know for sure of course, but I do know that this time the odds are in our favour and we have a really good chance to get exactly what we wanted for years now: Eddie coming out in season 8 and eventually, when the dust is settled, Buddie.
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kirexa · 4 months
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mymp3 · 5 months
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HAPPY NEW YEARS EVERYONE!
LETS GO INTO 2024 WITH A SMILE!!!
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So I don't know if it was ever revealed how Duncan felt when we killed Malistaire all three times but I'm wondering if maybe some part of him could hate us for that too. Like you hear that and you go "but why. Malistaire was terrible and even Duncan knew that(?). Why would he hate you for getting rid of him."
But like I think it's so....... interesting in a very, very, very sad way how Duncan so easily latches onto anyone who directly feeds into his delusions of grandeur. And that's no fault of his own that he was manipulated by the nasty Schism but when you think about how desperately clung to the idea that Malistaire, easily one of the greatest necromancers any of us had ever heard of (at that time), somehow actually recognized Duncan's talents (even when canon supports that Duncan wasn't all that talented, at least no more than the next necromancer) and then praised him for it so often that Duncan believed that he would be the next Death Professor is. I mean ☹️
So like with that mindset I unfortunately feel like it would be quite easy to twist even Malistaire's death as something that's horrible and awful and all our fault. ESPECIALLY if the Schism was feeding into Duncan's already broken mind and shattered ego and was constantly telling him that everything bad that ever happened to him ever in his life was Our Fault. That's like a realistic conclusion that someone like Duncan could come to
And like, at this point in time, are Malistaire's crimes even a factor in how he thinks????? Was Duncan ever able to separate Malistaire's talent and skills and prowess from the terrible and awful things he did? If Duncan wasn't able to consciously tell that distinction in the first place I can't imagine it would be any better during the years he was being manipulated and isolated and lied to
Like in Duncan's mind it probably isn't, "maybe I shouldn't idolize a national criminal, or idolize anyone at all for that matter, and aspire to be like someone so harmful when I can recognize my own talent and build from there" it's probably more like, "you (the wizard) permanently got rid of a brilliant mind, an innocent person who just made a few mistakes, and someone who believed in me no matter what just so that you could be the better than me and loved by everyone else" and that's! very sad actually!
#this is all speculation btw idk if any of this is canon. how duncan feels about all this#i know i keep saying the exact same shit over and over but.... really not a fan of how the game handled duncan! sorry!#i know wizard101 isnt supposed to be about every single character gets a satisfying ending to their arc-#-meaning not everyone in the story will face consequences and/or find a happy ending and like thats fine they dont need to#but idkkkk its just imo really sad how essentially a kid suffers frrom something he cant control by himself (his ego)-#and then instead of getting help he is instead ignored (ambrose) and then manipulated and brought up by a cult#and then when it becomes super apparent how... TERRIBLE his life really is and we defeat him he just... goes back??????#we.... we LET him go back???? i mean we're not responsible for other people's bad decisions or mental health but bro....#and then when we tell ambrose he's just like “oh. too bad. well anyways-” AND IM LIKE WELL THATS THE REASON!!!!! NO WONDER HE'S FUCKED UP#NONE OF THIS IS ADDRESSED. NONE OF IT. WE KICK DUNCAN'S ASS AND THEN HE.... GOES BACK TO THE CABAL#i literally just got so desolate when (wallaru spoilers) because. okay. all that for nothing i guess#this isnt me being mad btw LMAO i know the tone probably reads as angry but im not im just disappointed#and tired. what is it with wizard101 in particular and just people suffering with no end. (me as i make my main suffer with no end)#but anyways yeah duncan has been in my head for a while. he's one of the guys that i love a lot BDKSNSKAJ#he's like a son to me and HE NEEDS A HEALTHY PARENT. HE NEEDS IT#not excusing his actions btw. he still committed crimes JRKDJSIEJ#i just have a soft spot for those villains in media who are doomed from the start yknow. (stares tearfully at morganthe and gf spider)#wizard101#wiz101#w101#text posts#duncan grimwater#im not normal about duncan at all he's probably the wozard oc i feel for the most other than malorn and us
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thebirdandhersong · 1 year
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#as a side note i had a moment of horrid irony when i thought suddenly that I WISHED mr knight were there#because he was at the vigil last year and used to be a part of my church. and i suddenly missed all my old housemates#who were here last year! went to hug people during the peace and a good friend asked if i was okay#i was like 😭😭😭😭 not really and then turned around and SAW the boy and was like well this is a twist in the plot i truly dont care for#anyway all's well i just cried buckets more my heart's been wrung OUT#he lives fae away. he was not supposed to come. anyway he did and i shook his hand formally because he offered to (???)#*far away#it was totally bizarre#he did not stay for long which. thank God. i wouldve been so much more tired if he had#but he wished me happy birthday which irked me because we'd had an unspoken agreement to not wish each other happy birthday (for fear of#mixed signals) which. happened i guess#it was INCREDIBLY bizarre. the safest ive ever felt in my life was when he was holding me#and now he's a familiar stranger i know too well whom i dont WANT to know#anyway it has been a heartwrenching and soul draining Lent and past six months or more and i was ready to cry#and so i did. bawled like a baby after certain readings and songs. cried and cried and cried#re: reasons for that concerning the ex boyfriend: it is SO weird and i dont know how to deal with it#like. i still have so much love that it feels like grief and the grief bleeds into that love too#but that love isnt for HIM anymore or at least not the person i found he was. so now it really does have nowhere to go#ANYHOW IT'S LATE BUT THE POINT IS. HE IS RISEN AND THERE ARE MORE IMPORTANT THINGS#THAN SEEING YOUR EX BOYFRIEND AT CHURCH AND BEING LIKE ?????? HUH????????
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mementoasts · 10 months
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jonathan sims head archivist of the magnus institute london
#IM JUST POSTING HIM RANDOMLY BECAUSE I CANNOOOOOT FOR THE LIFE OF ME DRAW ANYONE ELSE. I HAVE APHANTASIA MAN IT'S HARD OUT HERE#i just started season 3 and heard him mention the graying hair i was like hm.. what if i tried drawring some characters.#i'm actually super happy with how he looks... i had some prior inspiration bc i followed one artist who's posted fanart b4--#(which is how i first heard of the series) and so i already kinda had a picture of him in my head bc of that (i love their art sdfghgfdjh)#so i was jus sketchin and i was like.... yeah this looks ok. i wanted his hair to be kinda just pokin up every which way in front--#--because i imagine him constantly running a hand through it. otherwise it'd look nice n tidy. i just sketched til it looked good enough#the eyes were easy because i wanted sharp and tired. the color was just me testin shit out and being like oooo that looks pretty#the outfit..... i just googled some like business casual stuff LOL. i thought it looked nice#bag and flashlight because he's dungeon crawling#he's also filipino for no reason other than i said so#OHHH YEAH freckles. freckles are cute. also worm scars.#i gotta say i didn't wanna put glasses on him but i thought he looked nakey without em.. but also it might be bc i was strugglin w lineart#the glasses make him look younger i think. which is bad!! he needs to look at least 35!!!#i dunno if i have it in me to draw the others;;;;;;;;;; martin i can't figure out a color scheme for-- and tim & sasha.... waauugghhh....#it's hhhhaaardd because when i'm like reading anything i cannot *picture* characters.... i just get like..... a feeling yknow.....#again i already had some vague images for jon (and martin) bc i saw fanart before lol so that's what showed up in my head#i have a good *feeling* of what sasha should look like but i cannot for the life of me draw it....#i keep sketching and going “noo this doesn't look like her” <- i DON'T know what she looks like#i've somehow instead ended up with a sketch that really feels like melanie tho lmao#if you're somehow at the bottom of this long ramble i will send you $500.#the void given form
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clerk427 · 2 months
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Tags rant
no general theme i just want to yell about stuff
will delete later i think
Upd. I am doing better but won't delete it because archiving purposes and I like to reread stuff like that as diary entries and think "haha what a feeble minded fool i was"
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