#but that love isnt for HIM anymore or at least not the person i found he was. so now it really does have nowhere to go | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

saltwatersweets · 2 months

Text

yknow, given the fact that it’s entirely possible wounds created by angelic weapons don’t fully heal (since vaggie’s eye never healed), and the fact that adam attacked alastor with an angelic weapon, and the fact i’ve seen a few fics in which alastor deals with chronic pain in his chest wound because of the injury, i’m surprised i’ve never seen anyone bring up an idea where adam’s axe landed just a foot or so above where it did in canon and ended up taking out alastor’s eyes, similar to how lute did with vaggie.

i’m not sure if i would be comfortable writing about this, given i am not physically disabled and i’m not sure if i could accurately portray blindness (especially with a character like alastor, who’s already so difficult to write), but i’d love to see this idea explored somehow. alastor is already someone who wants to be the most powerful (or at least in control) person in the room and so taking away his sight in a permanent way would definitely affect him badly. another reason i’m not sure i would want to write this out: the internalized ableism would be off the CHARTS. not to mention, a wound to the face isnt something he can hide like he could with a chest wound, so the other hotel inhabitants at least would see what happened as soon as they realised he was still alive after the extermination. he would not be happy about their endless concern one bit.

tl;dr: what if alastor was permanently blind after the extermination?

here are some ideas i have regarding this au (please let me know if any of them come off as insensitive):

alastor probably would try to use the recent lack of eyes to his advantage. after all, outside of one’s mouth, the eyes are typically the most expressive part about a person. even when he’s trying to conceal his emotions, you can tell what he’s feeling because of the expressions in his eyes. now, however, he’s even MORE difficult to read, which he likes to think gives him more control. the eyes are a window to the soul, they say? not anymore!

he looks rather similar to rosie now (based off how vaggie looked like when charlie first found her after she fell, with her eye socket just being dark and black)! once he’s accepted what happened to him, they’ll make an occasional joke about how now he looks more like a typical cannibal in hell, it just took him a century to catch up.

vaggie and him bond over losing one or more eyes because of adam (whether directly or indirectly). he hates the fact that he genuinely is more fond of her after this experience, because she never treats him like something about to break, for better or worse.

speaking of which, i feel the need to say that despite alastor likely viewing himself as weaker after the loss of his eyesight, he is not inherently weaker. it takes him a long time to know he is not ruined, he is just changed. doesn’t mean his musical mental breakdown in episode eight isn’t even worse than before now though. he hates that this has happened to him, that he has been permanently injured in this way, but he learns to live (or… exist? since he’s already dead) with it and accept his disability as a part of himself.

his staff (once repaired) and ears are incredibly helpful, especially since deer can hear extremely well. his shadow and microphone are also extensions of himself, so though he can’t see through them per se, they keep him from crashing into things when he’s in an unfamiliar area.

once mimzy gets over being “kicked out” of the hotel so to speak, they’ll still hang out and dance together! she doesn’t think of him as any lesser or any weaker after what happened, he’s still able to keep up with her on the dance floor even if it is a bit more difficult now.

the hotel inhabitants and some other people he regularly meets with will occasionally read his favourite books aloud to him (there were books in his room so i headcanon he likes to read in his free time). he never says it aloud, but he does genuinely appreciate this. he particularly enjoys it when niffty sits still long enough to read to him, especially if she’s reading out a cookbook and helping him make food. it is physically impossible for her to sound condescending to him.

on the other hand, charlie reading aloud is a mixed bag, because although she’ll always try to make it entraining for him (by being very animated in her voice acting), she’ll often interrupt herself to disavow the fictional violence. also, it is physically impossible for her to NOT sound condescending to him. he’s not a wayward sinner down on his luck for her to swoop in and save, after all! he doesn’t need her to try and “fix” him.

he has allowed angel to read to him a SINGULAR time, because while his voice acting is quite entertaining and he won’t complain about the violence (he has no room to talk, given the scripts he acts out), angel would rather die (again) than quit making sex jokes every two minutes. he could be reading a cookbook and sneak in a “that’s what she said” a good three times in a single page.

one of the first things charlie does upon seeing alastor is still alive after the extermination is ask lucifer to heal him, and lucifer has to tell her it’s not something that he can do. it’s actually something charlie initially responds with anger about, because at first she thinks he’s just refusing to heal alastor just because he doesn’t like him. it’s vaggie who steps in to calm her down, because she knows personally that angelic wounds can’t be fully healed. it’s been three years, she’s not expecting her eye back by now.

alternatively, it’s easy to imagine charlie still asking lucifer to TRY and heal him regardless, because maybe if they just try hard enough, they can do it! so lucifer tries. and it does not work. naturally, this only serves to make alastor more pissed off. he melts into his shadow and goes into his room, and doesn’t come back out until that night.

the next thing charlie does is spend no less than four hours looking up accommodations she can make to the hotel for someone with no sight. braille to all the rooms and other things that are labeled is among the first she gets lucifer to implement, as well as keeping nearly all of the floors loud tile instead of carpeted, so alastor can tell if someone else is in the room with him.

i swear i’m trying to think of something distinct for husk because his dynamic with alastor is so interesting to me, but i really can’t think of anything super specific. one thing that does stick out is that, like vaggie, he never regards alastor with pity, because he knows alastor better than most and knows he’s still extremely powerful. i’ve always thought alastor somewhat appreciates husk’s unflinching honesty (even though it’s a trait of his that undeniably pisses him off at times), and so he knows husk isn’t lying or acting when he still treats him the same way as before the extermination.

alastor will still make radio broadcasts, even if just for his own amusement. you don’t need to be able to see to be able to talk, after all! if anything, this experience only makes him hate television and modern day technology more. at least he revels in the knowledge that it is now impossible for vox to hypnotize him, if he ever dared to try.

he’ll make. so many eye puns. TOO MANY eye puns. you know that joke where people are like “we can’t ever let alastor know he’s asexual because if he does, the amount of ace jokes he’ll make will be through the roof”? yeah, it gets that bad.

i like the headcanon that alastor likes to draw on occasion (given the all but stated fact that he drew the hotel in the commercial in episode 1, as well as a few unnecessary but fun doodles outside of that), and he is initially saddened to realize that this is something he won’t be able to do anymore. however, niffty ALSO likes drawing, and she likes to rope him in to her drawings by force, giving him paper and crayons and always being completely honest if he ever asks what colour is in his hand. he’ll even occasionally let her move his hand to the right spot on his paper if he ever forgets where he drew the lines on his paper before. she likes to spend as long as she needs describing her drawings in vivid detail - she will talk to him about her gorey artwork, and no one will stop her!

65 notes · View notes

ultimateloserboy · 11 months

Text

I’ve been holding back this ramble forever but the food episode makes me tear up and i NEED to talk about it.

The food episode was the only episode I really couldn’t watch as a kid. I remember being horrified by it. to this day i still feel uneasy thinking about it, even though it doesn’t scare me in the slightest anymore. the reason i feel uneasy now isnt because im scared, its because to me its the saddest episode of the whole series and makes me want to punch walls. when i was younger i didnt notice a lot of the things ive noticed now, and every time i watch the episode i notice even more.

a lot of people talk about this episode as if red guy ran away and wants nothing to do with the house, that he’s trying to save the other two by bringing them to his world. while i dont think this is a wrong or bad interpretation, considering it’s understandable, id like to talk about my own interpretation. i dont think red guy even knew how he left. keep in mind he just exploded and then woke up in an office. there’s absolutely nothing suggesting he ran away on purpose. all he wanted was for colin to shut up, he wasnt intending to find the room he found. this itself isnt an interpretation, its a fact, BUT how he feels about it and what he does in the red guy world is completely up to interpretation! mine is that he wants to go home instead of trying to get the other two out of it. lemme explain ok hear me out:

throughout the entire food episode red guy is constantly popping up in the background somewhere. hes drawn behind windows and his head is in the microwave in one shot. when duck knocks the camera over for a split second you can even see his legs as it falls. the leg thing is what really got me, because most other times he was simply drawn. but those were his actual legs standing in the kitchen. to me it represents the fact that he isnt actually there but is “haunting” the other two. they dont really remember him but they can see him out of the corners of their eyes. hes blurry and far away but they KNOW someone is there (or WAS there, i should say). but on his end i think it could represent how hes still there in his head, how hes still singing songs and shit like that despite being out of that world. he says he hated that world, that hes allergic to music, but now that hes gone from it its stuck in his head. he misses the music. he misses his friends. hes still there in spirit.

before i continue id just like to say that, no, the main three INCLUDING RED GUY dont always want to leave the house. especially when they have to leave the others behind. whenever theyre off somewhere they usually want to go back home, yellow guy even said “i want to go home” word for word once. but he also said “no more songs” these things can exist at the same time guys. they can not want to drown in oil but still want to live in their house, yall realize that right? thats a huge theme in the show, that the house and the main three have a very complicated relationship. they dont want to leave their home they just want it to, yaknow, NOT EAT THEM. so i think red guy wanting to come home isnt at all out of character. and he doesnt like the red guy world anyway, why would he take his friends there when theyre wacky as shit and wouldnt fit in there or enjoy it at all? also id like to make the point that he doesnt know what’s happening in the house (at least not the seriousness of it) until he sees the machine. so him trying to save the other two from getting munched makes no sense to me personally. AGAIN THO THIS IS JUST MY INTERPRETATION!! YOURS IS VALID TOO AND I LOVE YOU!!!

But anyway continuing on, ducks reaction especially makes me insane. whenever i see how duck acts in episodes like “jobs” when he starts freaking out and trying to get the first aid kit for yellow guy im reminded of this episode. duck really does love his friends at heart. he doesnt want to leave the house, he sees no point, but to me the reason he doesnt want to leave is BECAUSE of his friends (or at least one of the reasons). in the tv series duck has a whole argument with red guy about leaving, and while some people say this duck is different than webseries duck i have to disagree. i think duck wouldve always argued about staying, but i also think hed always want to leave if red guy did. duck always switches up as soon as something is “wrong”. he always wants to stay until one of his friends is acting weird/hurt/missing and then suddenly the world isnt right and he doesnt want to be there. not only that but he will do everything in his power to fight against the things keeping him from his friends or hurting them, even if it means risking his own life. he knew some weird shit was going on every time he answered the phone, but despite that he continued answering anyway. he interrupted the songs and pushed things away and kept running to the phone, being disobedient and not giving a damn. this isnt unusual for duck, but it makes me especially ill, because he acts very confused as well. hes very upset, not mad like he usually is but genuinely upset and worried. most likely because of how hazy his memory is. my favorite scene of the series is when he pushes over the camera and says “i dont want to do this anymore” it rips my heart apart hes just like me fr. it also comes back to the transport episode, where hes like “well the song wasnt that great but at least it was funny. nobody gets TOO hurt by these songs and stuff so who cares? why leave?” i think hes always thought this way, the reason he says “i dont want to do this ANYMORE” is because suddenly the world has shifted. suddenly things are much more sinister and make even less sense. suddenly he is in genuine danger, and he isnt coming back this time. things have gone too far now, and he tries tearing down reality itself to get out, but unfortunately hes just not strong enough.

i also like to think that the food is singing about red guy the whole time, not actually food, and how he deserves punishment, and if you end up like him youll be punished too (which is exactly what happens to duck for answering the phone) “the bad, not-healthy foods are very rude! and must leave through the catflap!” isnt that what red guy did? he wandered too far and saw what he shouldnt have so he was sent away. also the steak says “you need to know whats right from wrong” which doesnt go with the rest of the song at all and seems to be directed at duck specifically. it seems more like theyre trying to keep duck and yellow guy in line rather than teach them about food. when they say “you shouldnt eat food from a strangers plate” considering the previous lyrics and the context before the chanting i think theyre talking about not believing what youre told by “strangers” (aka the non-teacher characters) theyre saying not to listen to whatever red guy is trying to say, to not answer the phone, to not end up like him. or at least thats what i think anyway.

lastly, the ending. yellow guy sitting in the kitchen alone, in the dark, covered in blood while the phone loudly rings is probably the most haunting part of the series to me. remember what i said about not being scared? well i LIED. this scene specifically still scares the fuck out of me. it fills me with genuinely painful dread. the scene where he looks over at the phone, hearing it but not getting up to answer it and letting it ring until red guy gives up is heartbreaking. im not sure if yellow guy even knows what’s happening in this scene, but hes been taught by now to NOT ANSWER THE PHONE. so he doesnt. and the teachers leave him alone with the phone because theyre confident he wont answer it. and theyre right. it breaks my heart just looking at it. in the next episode he ends up fighting back just like duck did, but just like duck, he cant truly do anything. it really puts into perspective how powerless all three of them are. god it ruins me. all they wanted was to know what the biggest thing in the world was, and now theyve been torn apart for wandering too far. cries and sobs

#dhmis #dhmis fandom #dhmis duck #dhmis red guy #duck guy #red guy #duck dhmis #dhmis analysis #yellow guy #yellow guy dhmis #dhmis yellow guy #dont hug me im scared #dhmis healthy band #dhmis food gang #dhmis tv show #dhmis web series #dhmis 5

180 notes · View notes

walnutcookie · 3 months

Note

can i ask what cheddar's curse is :333333333 3 33333 :333 :#3333333333333333333333333333 :3:#3333

HI I AM SO GLAD YOU ASKEDDD. :33 THANK U SO MUCH FOR THIS ASK /GEN. you have unleashed hell i am about to write so many paragraphs /silly /pos

ok to rb!

I need to draw a picture of them without the shadow sometime but. basically that glint in the shadow over cheddars face?

thats not their eye. they dont have an eye there anymore. instead it is a jewel :]c a cheddarstone to be exact. And it is very cursed!

still need to figure out exactly how it goes but when the blue cheese manor burned down they reached for the cursed jewel that their family had and They survived! They technically cannot die! but living isnt exactly easy

inside of them is a ton of Dark almost ink-like goop,, its like. Anti-life force. It seeps through their skin slowly and if it seeps out too much cheddar has to fight for control. if it gets really bad they lose control entirely. the only way to keep it from seeping out is by absorbing pure life force. they can obtain it through being around someone as they die, but more effectively they can kill people themself. Which is pretty easy since!! touching anti-life force kills a person IMMEDIATELY literally all cheddar needs to do is touch someone and theyre dead.

of course, if people knew that she was doing this, theyd be arrested immediately so theyve found ways to be sneaky about it :]c

for one, they cover themself up as best as possible. Literally from the head down its completely covered - giant coat, gloves, boots, etc. plus the hat covers not only the jewel in their eye but the anti-life force goop growing on his face!!! They avoid being in crowds or tightly packed spaces and theyre careful not to ever touch someone - while the clothing helps, it doesnt completely negate the curse, so while a brush of the shoulder may not kill the person itll at least drain them which will look suspicious.

obviously this quote wasnt related but shh its about Universe A. to me

cheddar has basically made themself untouchable (both metaphorically and literally).

say, theoretically, they need to take another victim. theyre travelling with macaroni on oh, say, a train, and they find a random cookie isolated in a train car with nobody around to witness anything. they peel off their glove and put their hand on the victims mouth, muffling their scream and killing the person instantly, and then they gently lower the body down so it doesnt make a noise as it hits the floor. next they use a knife to stab the person a few times - theyre already dead, but since touching them wouldnt give any indicators toward the cause of death, they have the perfect opportunity to create a false story behind the murder of this cookie and frame someone else for it. all they need to do after that is call macaroni to come see and he'll practically do the work for them!!!

ive mentioned this on one of my posts before but i headcanon that macaroni. cannot. stand. mysteries. he has to have them solved ASAP otherwise he CANNOT rest easy. he wont be able to eat or sleep very well at all. it makes him so anxious as much as he loves mysteries

Cheddar uses this to their advantage! theyve created a person in macaroni's head - someone whos lazy, who doesnt put much effort into their work, someone who doesnt rely on real evidence very much. How would someone like cheddar manage to frame someone else for a murder theyve committed and get away with it? especially since cheddar is around macaroni 24/7 and hed never expect them to do something in like the five minutes that they sneak away. not to mention cheddar has been working for the cbi even longer than mac and why on earth would a cbi agent kill someone for (seemingly) no reason??? In reality cheddar is actually much smarter and observant than they make themself seem but mac is in HEAVY denial about it because he doesnt want to have to think about his work partner being a murderer. Better to come up with other solutions (which cheddar so generously offers to him by framing people) than to point the finger at cheddar and raise dozens more questions that may be left unanswered. Plus the thought that all of the deaths cheddar caused would technically partially be macs fault. And as much as cheddar annoys him, mac has grown pretty attached to them.

someone could literally yell at mac and say LOOK!!! CHEDDAR HAS BLOOD STAINS ON THEIR COAT OH MY GOD!!!!!!! and mac will just laugh and say Haha that must be from lunch yesterday :) LIKE. cheddar has just made the perfect alibi for themself. they can never be accused of any crime because mac will defend them no matter what just to keep his own sanity

all of the killing and murder and crime aside cheddar is. Fucking miserable. shes so insanely touch starved bro they havent had a hug since like 1806 (except for like one person CCOUXGGHT COUCGHE GOUCGH ROUCYEO CAPPUCCINO COUGH COUCGH SPUTTER COUGH thats another post entirely though if anyone sends an ask abt it ill talk about it) and they try to make themself seem unlikable towards macaroni and try to distance themself from people and avoid relationships because even just a high five or a brush of the shoulder could be fatal. its too much of a risk, and its not one theyre willing to take.

he is fucking Smitten for macaroni theyre so head over heels for that girl but they just! CANT!!!! they cant get close to him because then he might DIE and not only would they lose the person they love but that would mean that their precious alibi is gone and theyd have to be extra extra sneaky about things to make sure that nobody catches them committing crimes. not to mention because of the way they act macaroni fucking HATES HIM. one sided yuri my beloved

anyways yaay ill stop there before this post gets too long X] theres more stuff about these two (including actual yuriful fluff NO WAAY) if youre curuois or have any other questions just shoot me an ask id love to answer!!!!

as always i dont think this is canon by any means it is all just my silly headcanon au because i think cheddar should be fucked up As a treat👍have a nice day If you read all of this i loveyiu so much /p

#cheddar cheese cookie #macaroni cookie #cookie run au #🎉 rambles #universe a au #tw murder #murder #i guess ?#ask to tag

26 notes · View notes

class-1b-bull · 22 days

Note

Ayo you're back!! Awesome!! Could I perhaps ask for how each of them are when they're chronically sleep deprived? Like "I've lived off of caffeine for the past two weeks and I am currently communing with the microwave via love bites" kind of sleep deprived (and maybe what the others do to get them to fucking bed)?

Not proofread we die like men

Awase - he already casually drinks energy drinks so no one really noticed he was as tired as he was until they tried talking to him. Bro can not understand a word being said to him at any given moment. Not to mention he sounds like the dyslexic scene from the ghost stories dub. Rin or someone probably throws him onto his bed only for him to almost instantly pass out lmao.

Sen - everyone knew he was lacking sleep when the saw him poor an energy drink into black coffee and say sorry to a wall for walking into it. He eventually falls asleep on the common areas couch and his classmates just leave him there undisturbed. (Monoma did draw on his face with a sharpie thought)

Kamakiri - it takes so long for people to find out hes lacking sleep. Him cussing at objects and drinking 12 black coffees in five minutes or less is considered normal for some reason. They only realize hes desperately needs rest when he doesn't immediately try to fight tetsu when he asks to train his quirk. He probably just ends up falling asleep on his own since he dosent let his classmates in his room anyways.

Kuroiro - bro is always sleep deprived so nothings new. He goes on average 2-3 days without sleep. So him walking into class with a bag full of energy drinks and a large black coffee extra espresso in hand no ones really surprised.

Kendo - shes pretty good at keeping a good sleep schedule but because of that kendo losing only a few hours of sleep can really mess with her head. So a full all nighter has her seeing stars and stuff. Everyone can instantly tell shes exhausted and all it takes is for someone to ask her to go take a nap and she does just that no problem.

Kodai - when shes sleep deprived she actually becomes more talkative but shes yawning in the middle of every sentence and constantly losing her train of thought (not to mention she poured an entire pot of coffee onto the floor before realizing she missed her cup completely.) Komori or kendo probably takes her to bed lmao

Komori - shes a very loving person so when shes sleep deprived its probably because she struggles sleeping without someone near her. Shes probably used to sleepovers with the other girls (mostly pony and setsuna) so once the girls see komori bite into a piece of tree bark she found on the ground they decided to hold a small sleepover to help her out.

Shiozaki - its really hard for her to become tired much less sleep deprived since she can absorb a little energy from the sun with her vine hair (at least thats what the wiki said) but since shes used to the sun giving her a little boost she quickly becomes tired during long periods of clouds and rain with little sunlight. She starts to doze off while standing and kendo has had to carry her to her room more than once during this.

Shishida - once he starts getting tired he takes less care of his hair(fur?) And it quickly starts getting tangled and matted. He unintentionally starts sounding like an old man thats fought both world wars. Idk its just his tired tone of voice lmao. He probably doesn't drink energy drinks so when hes sleep deprived there isnt a moment where there isnt a black coffee in his hand. He probably ends up falling asleep sitting up in a chair.

Shoda - if hes lacking too much sleep and the coffee and energy drinks arnt helping anymore he will simply fall asleep at his desk for a few minutes at a time or in the common area. If hes that sleep deprived he will catch up on sleep through little naps throughout the day instead of just going to bed normally. (Which arguably makes his sleep deprivation worse)

Pony - when shes sleep deprived she dosent bother with brushing her hair in the mornings or things like that so as she gets less and less sleep she looks more and more like a zombie. She probably is a lot like komori and needs one of the girls to help her sleep a bit.

Tsubaraba - hes always sleep deprived. It gives charachter. He'll go for days without sleep and not even notice until one of his classmates point out how hes taking to his own shadow. Rin and awase got him to go to bed. (It took welding him down but if it works it works)

Tetsutetsu - not getting proper sleep isnt manly in his opinion, so he tries his best to take good care of his sleep schedule. So on the rare times where he is lacking sleep hes not sure what to do. He ends up falling asleep in class and staying asleep until schools over pretty much. Other than being really tired and barely being able to form a coherent sentence hes not as bad sleep deprived as ya think.

Tokage - she will say absolutely anything and everything she thinks of when shes tired and she will be immediately forget what she said. Its not anything mean or remotely understandable for that matter, but she will say it. She seems the type to get more tired from things like coffee and energy drinks so those dont help. The only way she gets any sleep is either from the girls sleepover or by actually collapsing

Manga - pulling 4 all nighters in a row just to draw was not his smartest moment. Doing that during exam season was an even dumber move. He pulled up to class without a pencil or book of any kind but he had a black coffee with triple espresso. He dosent like coffee but he forgot until he was already half way done with his coffee and the bitter taste hit him like a truck. After that he slept for like 2 and a half days straight.

Honenuki - he can go 4 or 5 days without sleep but in those final few hours on the last day he loses all grip on sanity lmaoo. He'll be fine and then suddenly he'll be drinking 12 energy drinks in one sitting and forgetting his own name. Hes pretty good at getting himself to sleep at that point tho.

Bondo - no one can tell hes sleep deprived until he falls asleep standing up. He starts moving all sluggish like and is constantly yawning but other than that not much of a difference despite how tired he is. He probably ends up falling asleep in the common area.

Monoma - he loses an hour of sleep and he'll look like he hasn't slept in months. So even one all nighter causes him to get the biggest eye bags youve ever seen. He can only stay awake thanks to the multiple energy drinks he has. He finally gets some sleep after kendo knocked him out.

Reiko - she usually stays up later than the rest of the class so shes used to having a bit less sleep than some of her classmates but the second she starts walking into walls because she can barely keep her eyes open she knows its time for bed. When she gets like this she can sleep for almost a full day and a half and still be tired when she wakes up. Becoming sleep deprived is how she knows its bed time.

Rin - the only reason he would ever lose sleep is if he stayed up all night studying or some nerdy thing like that lmao. Day of the test he walks in with the biggest eye bags and 12 energy drinks in his bag only to pass out the second it starts and not wake up all day. He refuses to pull all nighters after his final grade dropped 20% from that.

Gifs anime - dungeon meshi

14 notes · View notes

lelelenaxx · 1 year

Text

✎…… 𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘏𝘢𝘪𝘬𝘺𝘶𝘶!! 𝘣𝘰𝘺𝘴 𝘥𝘰

Warning - Nothing really, a bit suggestive at points ( Mainly in Tanakas) , mentions of food and drinks, Not proofread

Hinata ❀

The type to drag you out at 3am to go on a trip to a convenience store to get food and drinks. Like deadass, you will be laying in bed ready to get the best sleep of your life and this man will have the fattest most juiciest grip on your arms and rip your poor soul out of bed and forces you into the car as he goes to the nearest gas station to get different drinks and food.

Kageyama ❀

He will flat out ghost you.... ON ACCIDENT. Like bro will read your message, put down his phone, tell himself he'll respond to it later and its not until you message him again that he'll reply.

Tsukishima ❀

THIS MAN IS A GATEKEEPER, he will be listening to a song and you'll pop up and ask him what song he's listening to he'll flat out say "You probably wont know them, they're undergound" and it will be someone like Rex Orange County. I believe he lives by gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss.

Nishinoya ❀

Definitely the type to send you the most unfunny tiktoks and memes he found on twitter. Please I beg of you to at least to act like you kind of found it funny. he will go into hibernation for the next 4 days if you say its unfunny, he get so embarrassed.

Tanaka ❀

"Is he bothering you queen?" Kinda guy. Will make sure you come home to roses and candles. Hes so sweet, hes trying so sweet okay pls dont be mean. I know it can be cheesy and cringy but be nice or his ego is wrecked for the next 3 years.

Kuroo ❀

Sends you random pics of cats he found on instagram at random times. Like literally you will be in the middle of a really important Exam and Kuroo will send you a picture of a cat with a top hat on.

Kenma ❀

Ok so we both know Kenma isnt a social person. But if you say one thing about a game he plays or knows of, he will go on an hour long rant. Its fun if you ask about a game hes played or is playing to actually hear him talk

Bokuto ❀

similar to Hinata but with going on late night beach visits. If you dogs you'll usually take them too. At around 11pm you and Bokuto just go out to the nearest beach and just have a nice time. Romance at its peak

Akaashi ❀

FLOWERS, EVERY, WEEK. Most romantic man Akaashi is. Flowers along as treating you out to dinner every week. I love Akaashi so much i cant even describe it jsdjofkdsnfoilkdsngokdngoifdgkfd

Im too lazy to write anymore

I cant make a part 2 if someone wants it

264 notes · View notes

anzynai · 2 months

Note

tbhk for the series thing :) but before the recent like 4 chapters cause i wanna pretend they never happened

HERES UR SECOND ONE and i havent read the last four chapters so dw ur fine LOL anyways hope u enjoy lovely 🫶

whos the most ticklish character?

personally, i think nene and mitsuba!!

but out of the trio: aoi, teru, and akane (since ik u love them) i think teru fs!!!

whos the character that most would assume is ticklish, but actually isn’t?

tsukasa, call me biased but he seems like he would be ticklish, especially cuz hanako is, but he actually isnt! or at least, not enough to make him laugh.. maybe a giggle here and there but thats all

who’s the character that everyone gangs up and tickles?

kou!! because hanako likes to mess with him, nene thinks its cute, and teru just bc theyre brothers LOL

who’s the character that somehow knows everyone’s tickle spots and reveals to others?

hanako, ofc. its like he has a sixth sense for these things and he doesnt hesitate to use it LOL especially to mess with his friends

who’s the character with one specific tickle spot that only one other person knows about?

id like to imagine that akane is extremely ticklish on his ears and (sorry its two ppl not one) teru and aoi r the only ones who know. both, especially teru teases him abt it constantly because he’s not so ticklish everywhere else (dont get me wrong, hes pretty ticklish but only his ears will have him cackling)

who’s the most likely to win gang tickle wars?

hanako, always has tricks up his sleeve idk, but can usuallu get the upper hand pretty quickly (it helps that his opponents tend to be wildly ticklish)

which characters didnt even know they were ticklish until another character tickled them?

mitsuba :(( he didnt really have many friends so no one really tickled him since he was a child sooo yk he just thought he wasnt ticklish anymore— or like it wasnt a thing on his mind lol but then he met kou and now he has to deal with a merciless (not really) tickle monster on the regular

also teru, but only for a little. thats because he was always the tickler, not the one bejng tickled until he was and found out he was very very ticklish. still keeps the secret to his grave though

which two characters have tickle fights all the time?

kou and nene hehe theyre just so playful with each other and nene always starts it, but kou thinks its fun so he doesnt mind

and then teru and akane, aoi prefers not to join in most of the time because teru actually is a sadist (?!) so even tho akane is less ticklish, he usually loses and aoi would much rather be alive LOL

#jai’s asks #tickling #tbhk #tbhk tickling #ask game #toilet bound hanako kun #my favorite <3

10 notes · View notes

jaemified · 10 months

Text

jaemified -> seventeen masterlist

[KEY]; A (angst), D (drama), F (fluff), M (mature), S (suggestive)

☆ (popular),♡ (personal favs), # (on hold)

taglist ; open !

choi seungcheol;

-coups day thoughts,, | 0.5k (2m) (F)

synopsis ; n/a

-keep it quiet | 2.1k (10m) (M,F) ☆

synopsis ; you and seungcheol never liked taking risks, especially with 8 of his 12 roommates home. but, up until your self control couldn’t handle it anymore, you both found it was best to keep it quiet.

yoon jeonghan;

-nothing yet

joshua hong;

-same dream, same mind, same night | 3.0k (15m) (A,F) ☆

synopsis; confiding in her longtime best friend after the end of a rocky relationship, choi y/n begins to heal once more and realizes what’s been waiting in front of her after all this time.

wen junhui;

-nothing yet

kwon soonyoung;

-world of my own | 1.2k (6m) (A,D) ♡

synopsis ; in a place which you fall into your own dreamland with the one who was meant to be the love of your life, the discussion gets highly theoretical (and not to mention, emotional)

-sunshine | 1.6k (9m) (D,F)

synopsis; the one who stayed by your side no matter how many times you got fired from different jobs, tells you no matter the outcome, you’ll always be his sunshine in the rain.

jeon wonwoo;

- [WIP] summer to winter | estimate of 6-8k (30-40m) (D,F,A) (#)

synopsis ; wonwoo hates his job but that all changes the moment he saw you walk through those cafe doors. the girl who would be his heatwave in december.

lee jihoon;

-nothing yet

lee seokmin;

-nothing yet

kim mingyu;

-puppy love | 2.4k (12m) (D,A,S) ♡ ☆

synopsis; you don’t care much for dating, but kim mingyu is an exception. even if you already know puppy love doesnt last

xu minghao;

-taking me high (angel) | 2.0k (10m) (M)

synopsis ; after being away from your boyfriend for almost a literal week thanks to your job, you want nothing more than him in every possible way. but when he finds himself picking his games over you, you come to a compromise; sneaking under the table while hes distracted.

-SNOWED IN! [MASTERLIST] | estimate of 4k-6k (20-30m) (D,F,A)

i | ii | iii | iv | v | vi | vii | ix | x

synopsis; when an unexpected storm comes over seoul, you and all of your coworkers are snowed in your workplace with no way out, yet you want to make the most of whatever time you have with minghao.

-last | 0.7k (5m) (S,F)

synopsis ; youre going to the states for college, minghaos pursuing his dream in korea. and hes gonna miss you, badly.

boo seungkwan;

- [WIP] pretty when you cry | estimate of 2.5k (13m) (F,D)

synopsis ; when your high school boyfriend you were separated from at the age of 17 moves back to seoul after 6 years, you find yourself crying in his warm arms once more.

vernon chwe;

-nothing yet

lee chan;

-i could never lie to you. | 0.9k (6m) (A,D,S) ♡

synopsis ; youve been struggling with a toxic relationship for years now, but you had no one to tell that to, or anyone thatd believe you at least. so while your boyfriend slips out for the night to god knows where, you use this time to write down and express everything youve bottled up all this time.

-chan as ur idol bf | 0.6k (4m) (F)

synopsis ; n/a

-through the window (21 days) | 2.7k (14m) (F)

synopsis ; after a long series of floods, youre finally able to meet the boy across the street who had caught your eye throughout the long few weeks.

- [WIP] seasons | estimate of 8k (40m) (D,A,S,F) (#)

synopsis ; when y/n begins to develop feelings for her best friend, she realizes life isnt as it seems in the movies, and that not all love is meant to last.

#kpop imagines #fanfic #seventeen fanfic #svt #seventeen smut #svt fluff #seventeen fluff #svt x reader #svt fanfic

37 notes · View notes

thesungod · 1 year

Note

Honestly one of the problems here is that the PJO universe has been milked to death already and the longer they try to keep bringing it back and continue the universe, the more nonsensical and unnecessary the whole thing gets. Don't get me wrong I liked the Apollo series and I love Nico, and I am still grateful that we got a book for Solangelo, a gay couple being featured as the mains is really great but the writing and the plot/story just keeps decreasing because in order to keep the story going, they just take the development back and kinda step back from the earlier books' development in order to keep coming up with more adventures. Or the writing just isnt really that great anymore due to many reasons.

The thing is that for me, ToA fixed HoO’s problems, or at least many of them.

It was back to being first person narration, not too crowded, actually addressed the point of the gods being bad parents and not caring about demigods. Not to mention certain characters, such as Nico, were allowed the development people wanted to see for them in HoO.

But alas it was too late, too many people had either grown out of the series or had been disappointed by Blood of Olympus and now we’ve kinda slidden back again with tsats.

I wouldn’t say the writing’s quality steadily decrease, I’d say it’s inconsistent. Every time you pick a RR book up, you don’t know if you’re going to read a beautiful fantasy book or… well. something else. I’ll wait for the Chalice of The Gods to make a judgement.

While ToA was definitely still a way to milk the PJO franchise, it gives me the vibe of being something RR actually wanted to write. it’s pretty different than the standard 12-14 fantasy book, starting with the plot, but also for the protagonist and the side characters.

That’s why it works, honestly.

It has some of the typical cashgrab elements (cameos, fan service ships etc except they are mostly inserted when they make SENSE) but it’s also genuinely enjoyable and personally I found the themes and story more mature and well constructed.

HoO is really the typical fantasy series for kids lol, not exceptional but not terrible.

The ToA fandom always says Rick Riordan had to write HoO because he wanted to write ToA sajdjajasks. Obviously we have no idea if that is true, but ToA was so peculiar and came so late (Rick must have known his old audience had grown up) that it seems a passion project to me. Literally who sat him down and forced him to write a book series about the god Apollo becoming mortal and going through Stuff.

On the other hand… you’re telling me they didn’t sit him down and force him to write the solangelo book? Please.

I don’t doubt he loves Nico (especially as he carried HoO on his shoulders tbh) but c’mon.

#ask

17 notes · View notes

kasperbunny · 27 days

Text

what if i take questions from this ask game and answer them about arty bc i just want to :)

What is their biggest regret?

i mean this...is obvious. but...even though it isnt his fault, he regrets allowing his family to enter that vault. he blames himself for a long time, wondering what he couldve done differently to prevent it, even tho there was nothing anyone could do :(

Who (or what) are they emotionally closest to?

Danse is the obvious answer, but Art is also very close with Nick and Preston. i suppose i could count Hancock too, but they are just kind of casual friends who get drunk together sometimes. i think Art considers Nick a kind of...father figure, of some sort. Nick was the first person to really be empathetic and helpful towards his situation with his family, and ever since then he's confided in Nick and considered him a very very close friend, despite Danse's disapproval.

also dogmeat, of COURSE. Art loves that dog SO much. he was sad when he joined up with the BOS and found out he couldn't bring dogmeat with him, so he leaves him with Nick until after blind betrayal, when Art can bring dogmeat with him and danse to red rocket :))

How do they feel about physical touch / affection?

it depends who it is. if its someone he isnt close to, even if theyre an acquaintance, then no he doesnt want to be touched at all. he tends to guard himself from others...but if you get close to him and he considers you a friend then he will gladly accept a hug or casual touches. Nick probably pats him on the back or lightly grips his shoulder sometimes, and Art appreciates that. and of course he and danse are very touchy, but Art probably initiates most of it since he feels so safe with danse

What faction(s) do they despise?

HAHA, the brotherhood. he hates being a part of it. he hates the rigid rules, the military-esque way of life, their bigoted beliefs, and their self righteousness. he thought he left that all behind when he left the military back in his own time. ive said it before but hes only a part of the BOS because he knows he'll be protected while hes with them, they provide him food, water, shelter, etc. and they allow him to investigate the institute and take it down. being exiled from them sucked, but at least he doesnt have to answer to anyone anymore.

What are their thoughts on chems and alcohol?

big thumbs up babey!!!!! for real tho i think at first he tends to use chems and alcohol (especially alcohol) as a way to cope when he first gets out of the vault. he doesnt know what else to do, really, or how to handle his emotions and his grief. it never becomes a problem, as he eventually breaks out of the habit, but everyone aboard the prydwen was used to seeing him drunk and shambling about a lot of the time.

after BB he still drinks occasionally, but danse makes sure to keep an eye on him and make sure it never gets out of hand :)

and i dont know if this counts but he does smoke cigarettes as well. i think hes been doing that since before the war. pre-war he was probably trying to kick the habit, and he was doing pretty well until uhh.........[gestures to everything]. hes trying tho.

#kasper yaps #artemis tag #I JSUT NEEDED TO TALK ABOUT MY BOYYYY

3 notes · View notes

chaitygers · 4 months

Text

Ivan infodump

OK SO i posted my little guy Ivan (big deer guy) and as i mentioned in his post, hes a mix of different characters i've like found interesting and that had interesting concepts that i wanted to explore in a character so yeah I decided to make ivan!

Ivan's like part of this universe im a part of w some buddies and he's like a werecreature (i cant rlly go super in depth w the lore here because i dont rlly know it that well LHDFCBDVLKHB) he was turned into one like after some stuff happened in his life that left him broke so he needed money to like get back on his feet and doing that (essentially making himself a test subject for this thing some scientists were doing) was the only way he could. Heres where the first theme i wanted to explore comes in, Guilt and Debt.

If anyone's read crime and punishment, the main character Raskolnikov essentially k1lls his crusty musty landlady so he doesnt have to owe her his rent anymore which imo, slay, but at the same time he is riddled with this immense guilt and like questioning himself as to wether or not committing a crime and a deadly sin (because hes also catholic so another LAYER of guilt added)

Raskolikov gets sent to prision to like seve his sentence but most of the book is like him debating with himself wether or not what he did was right, because he mrd3red someone that was a pest both to him and everyone else who owed rent to her, and she was a busive and mean so like thats someon no one would miss because she was bad so he's good for killing her, it was for the greater good, but at the same time in the eyes of the law Raskolnikov is a criminal, as well as in the eyes of religion because he murdered someone and thats an unforgivable act and hes supposed to go to hell for that.

In Ivan's case, his guilt lies in the fact that he was essentially the reason him a nd his family's business went into banktrupcy, if he was never born he woudln't have caused much trouble to his parents. He's the son of a violin maker, meaning business is not as big as theyd wish it to be especially as violins are expensive as shit because theyre handmade works of art that only few know the trade of making them and stuff. Ivan obviously inherited the knowledge from his father, helped him in the shop and helped to provide for his own family even as a child, but he still carries that guilt of being the reason niether one of his parents could fulfill any of the desires they had due to him being just "a burden" in his tiny little head.

In the debt aspect, he is quite literally indebted, left with the previous unpaid bills and unfinished projects his father left after he passed, and left with a bunch of customersn his father still owed things to like money, instruments and materials. To Ivan, thats the way he's repaying the hardships he made his parents go through. the family burdens are passed down generation by generation as well, because many of most of the monetary debts came from people of the past that made those bad desicions and left their descendants to deal with them. Ivan is determined to fulfill these depts, at all costs, and eventually that costs him his humanity.

NOW ONTO HANNIBAL!

I mostly wanted to do the c@nn1balsm as a metaphor for all consuming, obsessive love with Ivan , especially the love for his craft (because in the end he loves what he's doing, hes a passionate violin maker) but literally in the way that he loves as well. He isnt that bad looking, at least according to him (in my head his face claim is jacob elordi specifically in saltburn and like post euphoria and the kissing booth) but he does feel like he's hard to love because of all the guilt hes carrying for shit he didnt even do (like be incredibly indebted to the state). hes super inexperienced in love, has only had one long lasting relationship, and that relationship is one that consumed him so much that he couldnt see himself living apart from that person he loved after they broke up. Ivan has an anxious attachment style, always has and hes like a kitten with separation anxiety, he will wail and scream until he gets back to that person he feels safe with even if it means that he's actively pushing them away because of how clingy he is.

all that to say that he ate his ex boyfriend because if he couldnt be with ivan then no one could have him

So yeah that is like almost all of Ivan's story! i love him dearly and rlly want to expand more on him in the future!

#art #original character #oc #artist on tumblr #character #my characters #character concept #hannibal #crime and punishment #analysis #infodump #oc story #oc stuff #original characters

4 notes · View notes

luckyqueenreign · 1 year

Text

Suresh Route Episode Summary: 38

HEART RATE RESULTS....LETS GOOOOOO

Spoilers under the cut...

Dana asks you who's heart you want to have gotten raised the most...idk if this effects the results at all but I said Suresh just in case. I mean duh it should just be whoever you've already picked.

Gabi reads the results...The person who raised Suresh's HR the most was LULU ffs...she didnt even dance with him. Lulu's HR was raised the most by Alfie. Gabi's by Suresh 🙄. Finn's by Kat 🙄 MCs by Suresh. Danas by MC. Alfie by MC 🙄 oh here we go....Another emboldened declaration out of nowhere when the man literally said this morning that he was OVER US at casa amor. Suresh looks panicked and agitated (good u fucking should be loser...picking Gabi for any dances during HR! how could u!) And he says theres something he'd like to talk to you about too. Oh fun another declaration. Alfie says Suresh had his chance and that she deserves better (with who you??) And he literally leads you away and doesnt let Suresh speak...I dont even want to talk to you Alfie!!

Alfie does this big apology but it just all feels too little too late. OMG not a fucking time in the villa tour. Thank god you can just dead him right then and there. Sorry besties if you wanted the tour. I just couldn't care less.

After this MC can see Suresh and Gabi in a heated argument by the pool...the heated argument should be him telling her he doesnt want to be with her and she needs to lay off...but Lulu and Kat pull her for a chat to see what the Alfie chat was about. Kat goes on and on about how her and Finn are perfect for each other and I find it so odd that MC never steps in and tells her about the night before...I know Kat would should the messenger but still? Also Lulu says shes conflicted about HR results since Suresh's was raised the most by hers but MC tells her Suresh isnt interested in her and that he told her he's interested in MC. OMG now here comes Dana needing a chat too. Literally can everyone go confess there love somewhere else. I only want Suresh people.

DANA GEM SCENE: AHHHH Finn said he was talking about planning a big romantic gesture for MC today too!! OMG OMG OMG and when Alfie asked Finn about Kat, Finn said he didnt care about kat anymore. DEAD.

Gabi comes storming towards you with Suresh behind her looking upset and trying to stop her. the other islanders gather around to hear what she has to say. Oh great another bully moment!! Just what we've been missing this volume! At least Suresh tries to stop it. Gabi claims she was never the other woman...she said Suresh only had eyes for her the entire time they were together and that she was the one Suresh actually loved and if anything MC was the other woman...she said she found a ring. Suresh looks mortified. But then Gabi describes the ring and its the exact ring that MC always wanted even Alfie (bless his heart confirms this) all eyes turn to Suresh and he says the ring was never meant for Gabi it was meant for you MC...HE WAS GOING TO PROPOSE TO YALL 🥹🥹🥹🥹 A DOUBLE PROPOSAL

#litg ex in the villa #litg suresh x mc #litg mc #litg suresh #litg s5 #litg #litg spoiler #litg spoilers #love island game #love island the game #love island the game: ex in the villa #exinthevilla #ex in the villa

47 notes · View notes

aemiron-main · 1 year

Note

HELLO AGAIN!! Just wanna say that I love your analyses as always. THE NATURE DOCUMENTARY ONE, LITERALLY UNHINGED IT'S SO GOOD. YOU'RE SO GOOD!!!

You talking about how Mike used to be open about his emotions, but isn't anymore with the milk analogy???? JAIL!! PUTING YOU IN JAIL AGAIN- IT'S SO GOOD.

Anyways I've been reading on repressing and suppressing emotions?? Ok so I'm not claiming to be a professional or anything, I'm just reciting what I've read about!! IT'S JUST REALLY INTERESTING TO TALK ABOUT in the case of Mike.

Ok before I go on a tangent, I found something interesting-

CRYING!! MIKE WHEELER??-

Anyways suppressing is when you avoid talking or expressing an unwanted or uncomfortable emotion and in order to do that, some may do something to distract themselves, in the case of Mike (Him playing video games in the basement.) BUT there's also controlling your intake of food!! which is what Mike might also be doing. He's looking for some control.

Suppressing emotions happens when you don't know what to do with said emotions (aka his feelings for Will, he's having thoughts about Will so he ignores/avoids them by playing video games.) Basically suppression is something that you actively do whilst repressing is more unconscious. Mike might be a mix of these 2.

I think by the end of S4 or something he might be leaning more towards repression.

I wanna talk more about how his family life causes this, cause it's soo interesting. Mike doesn't know how to healthily express his emotions, because his parents are emotionally stunt. They've never talk about their emotions, so it's just uncomfortable for him to do so because he didn't grow up in an environment where doing so was considered normal. I think this effect the entirety of the Wheeler kids. They just don't know what to do with feelings, so they shove it down aka suppressing them. Just shoving them down so they don't have to deal with them.

Wonder why Mike feels more dull in S4? Going back to watch clips from S1-2 felt like experiencing smth different. Mike felt more explosive you could say, he was moody and angry, but at least it was an emotion. S3-4 felt like watching the colors drain out of him, because that's when he learns to shove them down, cause they're bad. Feelings like anger, frustration, sadness anything!! He shoves them down. Cause 1) he's shown that he can't express these feelings without repercussions, his parents punishment for acting out instead of understanding him. 2) He's been shown that these emotions are not important.

He thinks he shouldn't have these emotions, because he's not allowed to, he hasn't suffered enough to feel these.

Feels like I'm just repeating things, but he's SUCH an interesting character to talk about!!! Anyways just came here to say that you're probably my fav (personally) Mike analyst. You do it so well!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAA HELLO OMG!!! IM SO SLOW AT REPLYING TO ASKS IM SORRY BUT FIRST OF ALL THANK YOU SO SO MUCH YOU'RE SO SWEET AND IM SO GLAD YOU LIKE MY ANALYSIS!! I LOVE UR ART AND I LOVE UR MIKE'S LACK OF SELF VALUE ANALYSIS (i have a rb of it in my drafts i promise i havent forgotten abt it)!! AFBJHJBH THANK YOU THE MILK POST WENT FROM BEING A SHITPOST ABT HIM DRINKING MILK WHEN HES STRESSED INTO AN ACTUAL ANALYSIS BC I WAS LIKE 'wait... wAIT... a pattern is appearing..." AND YES OMG HELL YEAH IM SO EXCITED TO SEE YOUR THOUGHTS!! Okay so YES!!!!! THAT ABSOLUTELY SOUNDS LIKE MIKE AGHH!!! YOURE SO RIGHT!! Mike in the basement, but also mike controlling his food intake!! I personally think that when it comes to mike & food as a source of control, its more of a subconscious thing rather than actively being aware of it, like he lacks appetite and isnt eating for a variety of reasons which i need to make a full post on one day, and so he then associates not eating w that feeling of being in control and so then it’s just another reason on his list of various reasons as to why he ends up avoiding food! Esp since i think mike’s food issues are also tied to his repression of his emotions and queerness and guilt and again how he’s subconsciously seeking control through food, but also how he associates ‘real food’ in s1 with family and karen’s cooking but as that relationship w his family deteriorates, esp bc of his guilt abt his queerness and bc of his depression/mental health in general, his relationship w food also deteriorates. Mike’s life has had so many moments of a loss of control, esp w the supernatural stuff, but I feel like a.) the continuation of his relationship with el and feeling like he has very little control over that relationship bc theres so many expectations for him and b.) feeling like he’s lost will are two core losses of control that are really affecting him pre-s4, esp feeling like he’s failed and lost will and out of control of his life bc his sense of stability (will’s presence in his life) is gone, and so he’s seeking a sense of control through food while simultaneously punishing himself/neglecting himself by not eating. And that is SUCH a great point both about a.) mike’s feelings for will and focusing on videogames and b.) the distinction between repression vs suppression. I def think mike has a mix of those two, and is leaning towards repression in s4, yes!!!!

“I wanna talk more about how his family life causes this, cause it's soo interesting. Mike doesn't know how to healthily express his emotions, because his parents are emotionally stunt. They've never talk about their emotions, so it's just uncomfortable for him to do so because he didn't grow up in an environment where doing so was considered normal. I think this effect the entirety of the Wheeler kids. They just don't know what to do with feelings, so they shove it down aka suppressing them. Just shoving them down so they don't have to deal with them.” And that’s another fantastic point/great way of framing it, as if he feels “more dull,” in s4, because he DOES, because he’s tired and struggling and pushing down his emotions and feels like he’s always going to be demeaned or ignored if he expresses them!!! Mike’s parents are SO emotionally unavailable and not only do they fail to encourage Mike to show his emotions, but they also punish him for it too! In s2, when he’s upset and expressing himself about having to give away his toys, Karen reprimands him for his upset & reminds him off things that he did like graffitiing the bathroom stall- which is odd because he’s already BEEN punished for those things, he’s already lost his Atari, and the toys aren’t actually tied to his “bad behaviour,” but rather, Karen wants the toys to be given away & is using mike’s “bad behaviour” as an excuse. It also struck me that Ted, who’s usually pretty silent, chimed in to give Mike shit with his “strike 20 you’re on the bench, son” comment but we never see Ted chime in to defend Mike in any of the dinner scenes, only to reprimand him. We don’t even see Ted and Mike have a nice normal conversation at the dinner table- or EVER! When was the last time we saw Mike and Ted just. Talk. At all. An actual conversation, not even a deep serious one but just anything that isn’t just “Ted making snarky comments at Mike”? Hell, Mike doesn’t even respond to Ted’s snarky comments at the s2 dinner table, nor does he respond to them in the kitchen scene in s4 ep1. He’s responding to Karen in both scenes but not Ted. We literally haven’t seen an actual conversation between Mike and Ted at all. The CLOSEST we’ve gotten to that is s1 ep1 where Ted is fixing the tv & Mike tries to ask about staying longer for dnd but Ted shuts him down and tells him to talk to/listen to Karen. This is REALLY interesting to me because that’s the only time we really see any sort of two way dialogue between Mike and Ted where they’re even just. Responding directly to eachother at all. And it’s because from that scene, Mike has learned that he can’t go to Ted and that Ted’s just going to redirect him to Karen & not listen to Mike, so then in Mike’s mind, why should he even bother with Ted? Mike shoves down his feelings SO MUCH, we see him get shut down so often and eventually he just starts shutting himself down & repressing his own emotions before anyone else can try and shut him down. “S3-4 felt like watching the colors drain out of him” THIS IS SO SO TRUE AND ACCURATE AND AGAIN IS A FANTASTIC WAY OF FRAMING/PHRASING IT!!! THATS EXACTLY WHAT IT IS!! And i completely agree, at least he was EXPRESSING himself, at least it was emotions, but then in s3-s4, he REALLY starts shoving them down, because exactly like you said, he’s been shown that not only are his emotions deemed unimportant, but they’re also actively punished.

He thinks he shouldn't have these emotions, because he's not allowed to, he hasn't suffered enough to feel these.

EXACTLY!!!!! He feels like he isn’t suffering enough because of how he compares himself to others & invalidates his own experiences and emotions & how other people, including El (with the s4 bedroom fight scene and her invalidating him when he talks about being bullied) have invalidated and shut him down too. And that’s part of what frustrates me about some of the discussion surrounding Mike’s mental health in the fandom too- they fall into that same “Mike hasn’t suffered enough to have mental health issues,” trap, and compare Mike to other characters and use that comparison to invalidate and willfully ignore his struggles and it’s NOT frustrating because that approach completely misses the POINT of how Mike’s character aligns with people who feel like they are suffering enough & who are invisible & who invalidate themselves because of how they’ve been invalidated by others.

HES SUCH AN INTERESTING CHARACTER AND I LOVE THE THOUGHTS YOUVE MENTIONED HERE!! And thank you so, so much omg that makes me so happy because i LOVE analyzing him! YOURE SO SWEET THANK YOU SM AAAAAAAAAAA!!! 💗💕

#st asks #stranger things #souppiemousse #mike wheeler analysis #mike's mental health #st analysis #wheeler family #ted wheeler ref #Karen wheeler ref #TW ed #mike’s food issues

23 notes · View notes

tuxedokit-thoughts · 6 months

Text

i want to kill myself

im not going to, but mom says i should write my feelings out. says itll help me feel better

and. i mean. i know its worked before. i have this whole thing to prove it

see even just tryping that much helped a little. at least enough that ny urges are back in the harm territory and not in yhe kill territory. which isnt great. but. yknow. ill take what i can get? i guess?

i dont know anymore. it feels like theres this gaping hole in my chest, and everything i have and everything i am is just pouring and pouring and pouring out of it until there is nothing. i dont want to be nothing.

but maybe it would be easier than this

i hardly got out of bed today. i didnt get dressed, i only ate because my brother was so gracious as to bring me a bowl of canned chicken noodle soup. he put a little rosemary in it, "to make it fancy," he said. it wasnt perfection, but it was the best goddamn soup i had ever tasted in that moment. he used the last clean bowl for it. its his favourite too, a kirby themed ramen bowl with holes for chopsticks and everything.

chicken noodle isnt even my favourite soup. fi think its just. how loved i felt? when he carried that bowl into our cramped little room from our cramped little living room.

i was standing like. an hour ago? and he asked me to try to clean a bowl for him. (he does all the household chores, save for dishes. we both hate them, but i can barely do shit else, so one really shitty chore is better than a mountain of decent ones)

i took one look at our sink, so full of dirty shit you can hardly see the faucet, and i tyrned around and let myself fall limp, face first on my bed.

i put the blanket over my feet, so that if he came in he wouldnt have to see them (even the thought of feet disgusts him, i think)

he did come in, but i dont think he realized how hard it had been for me to even do that. i think all he saw was a whiny, ungrateful, pathetic mound of flesh under a blanket. someone so useless it couldnt even clean a single bowl for him without falling apart.

i heard him clean his own bowl. i have never felt so guilty for doing absolutely fucking nothing.

he already puts up with so much shit from me. im a drug addicted, mentally unstable, sorry excuse for a person.im trying, god im trying so fucking hard, but every day is harder than the last, it seems.

still. he deserves better than this.i dont know why he bothers.

... i keep finding myself scratching my cat scratches from earlier today. it stings. i feel like i deserve it.

i know thats not true. but honestly? scratching at my hand and wrist is better than actually doing something, right? its just a sting on fresh skin. no blood, no fresh wounds. just the pain thats already there. just poking at my bruises so i feel something other than this crushing despair

god. i cant believe i said that. i mean thats a totally normal thing to say in a crisis. ive just soiled my mind with references and medias and now i cant be normal about anything haha

anyway

yeah.

...

i still hate myself. but. i guess this helped me stop crying as much? i dont know. i dont know anything anymore

thats not true

i know my wrist hurts. like a cat scratch, it stings on the back, mostly because thats what it was, at first. from where both my cats claws and my own found themselves digging into my skin, i can feel a bump when i glide my finger over it. and every time the pain gets too dull, too quiet, i let my nail return to its little groove and pull, just for a moment.

i know my heart hurts. like i have been carved open, my contents unceremoniously dumped on the floor. my blood spills out on the floor over my organs and my thoughts, and as i try to clean it up the lead in my veins says stop. and so i lay there, on the ground, next to the contents of the person i have become. it is all blackened by tar and resin.

i know that every breath i have taken today has felt like a chore. like slogging out of bed at 5:45 in the morning to get ready for school, knowing i wont learn shit because all my energy will be focused on holding myself together, or at least keeping myself from shattering altogether. ill just slog through another page of the textbook, wondering why i bothered when i couldve just stayed home.

i know i am loved. even if i dont feel it. even if i dont deserve it.

i know i never had a choice in any of this

...

i know that. for now. ill keep dragging myself out of bed. keep breathing. scratch my wrist so i dont cut it.

and maybe tomorrow ill apologize to everyone whos had to put up with me

{16/11/2023}

#tw suicide #tw self harm #actually bpd #bpd vent #for reference said brother is also one of my fps #and he wasnt even mad ab that hes just had his own no good very bad day #anyway #tuxedokit art #fuck else should i tag this with #oh yea #tw drugs #drug addiction #drug abuse

2 notes · View notes

twinksintrees · 2 years

Note

Please tell more about your playlists! I've been listening to some of them and I'm rll curious about why you put certain songs in playlists and ur anlysises on them!

thank you for the ask!! Bc this ended being way longer than I thought it would be, I’m only going to be focusing on one playlist here, but I will write up similar post for most of my other playlists as well. Today we will be focusing on my Glenn Close playlist.

Edit: a link to the playlist has been added below bc I forgot to put that in when I first posted lmao

Analysis under the cut

Carry on my wayward son: this might be one of the simplest to explain, and its because the cast themselves have joked and talked about how this song fits glenn, even going so far as to make the title to one of the most important glenn centric episodes. It has to be on there imo.

Highway to hell: this one is also simple to explain, glenn became a demon and went through his owm highway to hell, as it were. It also fits into his dad rock theme, as does carry on my wayward son.

I miss having sex but at least i dont want to die anymore: i dont have a real reason for this one honestly, i think i heard this song on a random playlist and it made me think of glenn? I think theres a version of glenn in my head that lives as a human and goes back to the human realm as normal with the other dads and this would be from his pov after he grows and gets older and does some healing i guess?? It doesn’t make a lot of sense ik.

Anna sun: this is one of the songs most closely (heh) associated with glenn in my head. This song makes me think of young glenn, fresh after morgan died, being left with a 7 y/o Nick and no idea how to cope with either of their grief. The chorus of “this house is falling apart” sung with more and more intensity makes me envision a scene where its young glenn, standing in a small, lonely apartment holding a tiny nick in his arms as he looks around, no idea what to do without his wife and best friend here to help him. The lyrics “we got no money, but we got heart” make me think of glenn, failing rockstar, determined to make a way for himself and for his son.

Sickly sweet holidays: i found this one on another glenn playlist, and the christmas theme was perfect, but also, the lyrics “im crying every day, i wish that you were here, when christmas comes this time each year” are so heartbreaking applied to him and morgan if its him singing that after shes gone.

Last christmas: it fit the christmas theme and i just liked the jimmy eat world version lmao.

Home: this song. just breaks me. The pain and the heartbreak and the tragedy of losing someone you care so deeply about just is glenn with morgan. The lyrics “and i got mad when they said that you weren't coming back to me, cause i hate hearing the truth” are crushing in this case especially because glenn does hate hearing the truth. He’s the type of person who avoids his problems until they slap him in the face. He does that with his grief, doesnt acknowledge his or his son’s pain, and it isnt good for him. For either of them.

Ghost of york: this song is on the playlist solely because it slaps and because of the lyrics “and from the corner of my eye/i saw you dressed all in white/i saw you pass right by/maybe i had too much wine/you never said goodbye” for me, this song speaks to a sad, depressed glenn mourning his wife and drowning his pain with drink, wishing he just had the chance to say goodbye one more time.

Afraid: “when i wake i'm afraid somebody else might take my place” i mean, this literally happened with him and jodie. The chorus is glenn talking shit about jodie. “It hurts but i wont fight you” is glenn accepting jodie as Nick’s new father.

Pope is a rockstar: i dont care i dont care if the lyrics are ‘pope is a rockstar’ Glenn sang ‘go little rockstar’ to nick when he was young and you can't change my mind.

Never love an anchor: oooohh boy. Oh boy. Pain. let's go. With the first lyrics alone “on some level i think i always understood/that these hands of mine were clumsy not clever/and i tried to do the best that i could/ but try as i might i could not bring myself to hold you” this is a very glenn song. Glenn Close was not meant to be a father, no matter how much he loved his son. In fact, with the next set of lyrics we’ll be looking at “a ship could never really love an anchor/so i did the only thing that i could/and severed the rope that set you sailing from my harbor” they can be tied directly to him making the choice to let nick go at the trial. “There are times when i still wonder about you/you are someone i have loved but never known” glenn still loves nick, but that's not the same nick he raised. He is someone glenn has loved, but never truly known after the swap with jodie. “You’ll never see the reasons i had/for keeping my claws away when they were close enough to hurt you” nick will never really know the choice, the sacrifice glenn made when he called for the switch. He will never know the pain glenn saved him from losing two parents. “I am selfish i am broken i am cruel” represents all of glenns self hatred and negativity. I think at certain points pf the podcast he genuinely believes all of those things about himself. “I am all the things they might have said to you” is glenn being terrified nick will end up exactly like him and so deeply hoping he doesn't.

The light behind your eyes: this song is from glenn’s pov in prison. “If i could be with you tonight/i would sing you to sleep/never let them take the light behind your eyes” the idea of him being able to get out and sing this for his friends around a campfire, or sing this softly to his son one last time keeps him going. “I failed and lost this fight/never fade in the dark/just remember you will always burn as bright” is glenn literally losing the court case and getting sentenced to the prison, he is the one fading in the dark, and the only thing keeping him going is the memory, the brightness, of his friends and of his son. I also think glenn sang this to nick as a lullaby when he was a little kid.

Death as a fetish: this song also represents glenns incredibly negative internal voice. The repetition of “i will never be good enough” is all of his internal thoughts that he will never open up about or share with anyone.

The soccer journals: read for a better explanation below

Hey there delilah: read the post linked below for an explanation. @that-one-queer-punk pointed this one out to me and actually wrote a fic based on it, and I’ve linked it below if you wanna check it out, it’s good shit.

Cold cold man: this for me is young glenn when he and morgan are just starting to get together. He’s very devoted to her and he truly believes “the only bed worth sleeping’s the one right next to you” he can appear to be smooth, suave guy who sleeps around, but he honestly enjoys a monogamous relationship and would never betray her that way.

Therapy: glenn needs therapy. Plain and simple.

#dndads glenn close #dndads #dungeons and daddies #glenn close #character analysis #if there any spelling mistakes I’m so sorry #just roll with it #if anyone has any follow up questions I’d be more then happy to answer them #the other character playlist breakdowns will take a while to get down with but they are coming so I hope you #enjoy those in the future :D

22 notes · View notes

hometownrockstar · 1 year

Text

I think it does some disservice to say that since a sequel (or any kind of branching-off of a media) goes against the themes of the previous movie(s), that alone makes it bad... bc i personally think you can do it well, if it doesnt feel like it contradicts and then sours the themes of the previous movies. i like it when it's done to show another side of an issue or dilemma, a new type of development for an already well-developed character. its like the character writing advice, where virtues like bravery or selflessness can become flaws if taken to their extremes.

an example of this is toy story 4, which i think has its fans and haters but most ppl i see don't like it bc they think it "ruins" the last 3 movies, and particularly the end of the 3rd one. and maybe i dont agree with that AS much simply bc 3 is my least favorite of the series, but i think its deeper than "oh woody has been learning the meaning of friendship with kids all this time, why does he learn the opposite now?" its not the opposite, all those themes are still built up in this movie, its just that its about HIM now, not his purpose or role anymore. he learns that he's not needed anymore, after learning how nice it was TO be needed by kids and teaching this to other toys, but this isnt sad for him anymore, now that he is taught he can have a new life outside the toy/child dynamic, that there's more to his life. i found it touching and realistically done

Also, it highlights this in the beginning parts of the movie nicely. Toy Story 1-3 all open on montages of Andy playing with woody and the other toys, the theme playing, its about kids and toys and their bond. but Toy Story 4 opens on a gritty, rainy night, all realism for the toy's lives, their internal society and what they go through in their own lives between each other. i think it sets the tone for learning to set out yourself and let go of your past purposes, while never shaming or tearing down those past purposes they spent with the kids they loved.

9 notes · View notes