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warriordreamer95 · 4 years

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RWBY Volume 7 Crew Commentary Notes!

All credit goes to Sweetfable over on Reddit! Sweet, if you’re on Tumblr and have already posted this or want to, let me know and I’ll take this down!

Chapter 1

Featuring Kerry Shawcross and Miles Luna.

Miles says he was hoping people didn’t figure out Atlas was a floating city in the sky before they got there. Even in World of Remnant, they were very careful with how they worded things to avoid spoiling this fact.

A large portion of ep 1 was intended to be in V6

Originally it was going to end with Penny being revealed, dealing with the Grimm, and ending on “Salutations”

Almost everything up until the Penny moment was how it was going to be in V6. For production and story reasons they decided to end V6 with just seeing Atlas.

Mantle is a little more Blade Runner and utilitarian looking, while Atlas was made to look like it was created by Apple. Two different futuristic looks.

When making the four kingdoms, they compared it to parts of the real world. Atlas and Mantle were two different versions of America

The drunk guy (Drunk Mann) we see insulting Blake is based off of Joel Mann and the other is Dustin Matthew (Grape-kun).

We saw Pietro (his hand) for the first time in Volume 3. They didn’t want to make him too similar to Dr. Weller from gen:LOCK, and so they made him to be like a ‘big’ kid. It’s where Penny gets a lot of her attitude from.

Kerry wants to do a show with all the old RWBY characters

V8 was harder to write than V7

It was a challenge in this episode to make it clear that Atlas is a new place for some characters, but a familiar one for several others, but that the Atlas in V7 is a different one than what they remember.

They try to theme the grimm to the location. So Grimm from Atlas are those that are from the Ice Age.

Miles compare Grimm to Pokemon. Some will pop up in every region, while others are region specific.

They had a lot of discussion surrounding what they wanted Penny 2.0 to look like. They considered giving her a conflict of her being a clone or not having her memories, but ultimately with the amount of stuff that needed to happen this volume they felt that it wouldn’t have been able to be done well.

Chapter 2

Featuring Kerry, Conner (director), and Kiersi

Forest became a fan-favorite

This episode was tricky to write because it was getting close to being an exposition dump

They had to balance movement and how much the characters can emote (especially when characters lie this episode)

Ironwood’s office shifting to present his plan was a cool idea + it was another way to stay in the room without having things get boring

Really wanted team RWBY to feel like they were on the right path and had something to follow. Establishing the trust theme early on.

Qrow and Ironwood’s relationship is super interesting to Kerry, and he wishes they could have explored it more. Conner pushed for Qrow’s hand to be lower in the hug scene (lol)

Conner jokes that he also proposed Ironwood should propose to Oscar when kneeling

Ironwood giving the relic back was his biggest sign of trust

They comment about how positively Penny states ‘it’ll be just like Beacon again!’ when she got destroyed there in V3

Kerry calls Watts ‘Daddy Long Legs’

Chapter 3

Featuring Kerry and Miles

They were confused when they saw people on Reddit and Tumblr think that this volume would have a shopping montage

Team RWBY jumping out of a plane is a callback to landing strategies and to see how far they have come since V1

The crew thought everyone would love Jaune’s new haircut, and was shocked when everyone immediately hated it. Miles wanted to see Jaune grow up a bit, so he liked the change.

They wanted team RWBY to start acting like and learning from professional huntsman

Miles wanted Atlas to feel like the Beacon days at first, and first came up with the idea that some Atlas academy professors would teach them. But that evolved into mentors, which eventually became Atlas’s best of the best.

The Ace-Ops are not only fun characters, but also foils to some of our main characters to help move their stories along

The Ace-Ops having five members + a team name not based on a color was very intentional. It was to show that Ironwood doesn’t care about Oz’s rules and would rather have an efficient team.

Eddy came up with the name Ace-Ops. Each member is based off an Aesop fable.

The mine scene has us seeing the SDC logo everywhere. Adam, as a terrible of a person as he was, when he was younger, was arguing with someone at a SDC place and the other person grabbed a brand and gave him his scar. So seeing the logo all over the mine was very intentional to put that in the forefront of Blake’s mind, and Yang notices

The fight with the Centinel grimm was originally supposed to be a bit longer and there was going to be an alpha variant of the centinel (which they imply we will see in the future)

Some characters got more upgrades than others. Weiss is already perfect, so she didn’t need any changes. Miles was excited that they were able to give Ren heavy rounds to shoot with. Ren has his father’s dagger on his arm

Many things that seem like retcons are actually not, and instead is just Kerry and Miles learning how to tell a story while simultaneously telling a story. So things were not always explained well early on.

Qrow and Clover were an interesting couple of characters, Miles says. For a long time Qrow was the guy that worked best alone (compared to Shadow the Hedgehog) and wanted him to interact with people that aren't his nieces and their friends. Clover was made to be a total bro and like Captain America- who always makes luck puns. He constantly feels like he is in an action movie because things always go right for him, so he doesn’t need to look where he’s about the jump. Which ultimately leads to someone who relies too much on their semblance. He rides the line of confidence vs arrogance. Clover is kind of person that Qrow always wanted to be. At the beginning of their friendship, Qrow doesn’t really like Clover and finds him irritating. But eventually it evolved into friendship, and later tragedy.

They left RWBY out of the battle of the Ace Ops vs the Geist to showcase how they didn’t need RWBY to get things done. It was their moment to shine

Wanted to give a sense in these first few episodes that, maybe everything will work out okay

Spoiler alert: It won’t

Chapter 4

Featuring Paula (co-director), Dustin (co-director), Eddy Rivas, Kerry Shawcross

Wanted a chance for the characters to breathe a bit before bigger things went down

Kerry loves the lighting in the first scene. They referenced how lighting looks in the tundra

The first draft of the scene where Ironwood is giving orders originally happened in his office

From V5 they learned it’s great to be efficient with sets but they can fatigue the audience and the crew

Originally the celebration wasn’t going to be in Amity, and instead it was going to be in Atlas’s version of an auditorium.

The ship Jacques arrives in is the same one Winter arrives from in V3. It’s a Schnee company ship

Paula thought it was important that Blake hold Weiss’s hand and be the first to stand by her side when Jaques is yelling at Weiss since Blake knows what it is like to be in an abusive relationship. Ruby and Yang didn’t even really know a father would talk like that to his daughter.

They were excited to write Penny and Winter’s ‘mirror-destiny’, which they laid some of the foundation for this episode

Qrow talking to Ruby was barely on the outline for the episode, but it was on their wish list if they had time to get it in.

Dustin says ‘fatherly’ when describing the moment and Kerry is like, ‘you just opened up a whole can of worms’

Eddy loves the ‘Jim’ gag when referring to Jaune.

Watt’s entrance was a difficult shot to execute properly because of the door.

Chapter 5

Featuring Conner, Eddy, and Kerry

They originally weren’t sure about having a montage in this episode

The penguins we see for a moment were possibly going to be grimm penguins

Kerry wants RT to sell the cards Clover has, and Eddy thinks it’s funny he would have cards with him emblem on them.

They liked having the moment of Clover and Qrow in the middle of this episode to show that Qrow is now becoming a mentee of sorts.

Adding in the Robin encounter was a late addition to the outline. She wasn’t going to be introduced until Chapter 6 during her rally

But they wanted to put the two factions head to head earlier on.

It was also the first moment of Clover being a bit duplicitous.

The plot line of tying the supplies through Robin’s storyline was a late addition while writing

Weiss vs Winter with summoning is a callback to V3C4 with them training together

Weiss being able to sit on hard-light (a block) is something Kerry was unsure about at first

Originally Weiss and Winter going to see Fria was going to be Winter getting an alert from Ironwood and having to leave, and Weiss following her suspiciously. But it worked better as Winter revealing a secret while Weiss was still keeping one

Chapter 6

Featuring Paula, Kiersi, Miles, Eddy, and Kerry

Eddy is the one who came up with the idea for the middle part of the season while he had a really bad fever

Originally Tyrian was going to make it look like a bunch of Atlas soldiers fired on civilians in Mantle. Then Eddie thought it should frame RWBY, but ultimately they went with framing Penny.

Nobody has ever offered Penny a fist bump before, so she wanted to do it perfectly

An old draft had the team and Ironwood doing an investigation at this warehouse post-massacre

There was also no montage in C5, just them sitting around a table talking about what they did

Miles also mentions there was going to be a scene in C3 with Marrow trying to bond with Blake about being a Faunus, and also about him specifically being a Faunus in Atlas who is a part of Atlas’s military team. But that episode was so packed they wanted to move it to C6, but then that episode also became too packed. But they plan to get to it in future volumes

They wanted to show how much the Happy Huntresses care about each other and about Mantle

They also originally did not want to have anything political in this season. But the more iterations they did, they felt it was the best course of action to do that with the story.

They wanted to give the heroes a high personal moment with Renora kissing right before things went down

Penny was not used to fighting sneaky enemies, so that is how Tyrian got the upper hand

While they don’t usually check back up on extras, things turned out that we kept seeing Drunk Mann and Grape-kun throughout the season to represent the city of Mantle

Chapter 7

Featuring Conner, Kiersi, Miles, Eddy, and Kerry

Fiona’s semblance was originally going to be Torchwick’s semblance, and it was called Deep Pockets. But they never found a moment for him to use it. So they decided he could be a great example of how some people don’t unlock their semblances

Originally some of C7 was meant for C4 where they found out earlier that Tyrian was involved with things

Miles wrote the description we got of Tyrian’s past (Salem first contacting Tyrian), and it was one of his favorite things to write.

Qrow looking at Clover when he is willing to go with Ironwood’s plan was meant to show some distance growing between the two

We were going to get more of Ren explaining why he was feeling the way he was and agreeing with Ironwood, but ultimately they are pushing it to next volume

Originally Blake and Yang were going to directly reference Adam when they had their talk, but they later figured out how to reference him indirectly

The arm robot Pietro has in his office was originally going to have more of a character like the robotic arm Tony Stark has

They tried hard to get Maria more scenes, but there was often no room for it

Miles realizes he was dumb to suggest that Pietro cover Watt’s face with his thumb while looking at a picture since they already did that with Raven in V3

The lady in the photograph with black hair is not Cinder’s mom (which was apparently a fan theory)

Robin encountering the Bees was a late edition to the outline. But it gave every member of RWBY a moment

They wanted the vault in the Academy to feel similar to the one in Haven but not a direct copy

Miles believes that if Ironwood would allow himself to be more vulnerable more often things would’ve gone differently

The invitation to the Schnee manor was originally going to be to a news conference

Chapter 8

Featuring Dustin, Miles, and Kerry

They didn’t specify what the hood ornament on the car would be, so Dustin was happy when it came back as a velociraptor, which references a raptor Monty Oum would put in photos with RWBY characters

Fans have guessed what direction they are going with Whitley. He starts off as a jerk, but Miles implies that is going to change. It is also an easy way to remind the audience of how the elite act

At the table, Jacques’s chair is bigger than everyone else's

Miles wrote the gag of JNR sabotaging Whitley’s conversation with Weiss and expected it to take only a few seconds, but as more people worked on it the longer it got

The stack of food was taller than Dustin expected it to be, and they even had to scale it back because it was going to be even taller

Another power move of Jacques is to only give a few people wine, as well as not giving Penny any food

Willow was originally going to be in the intro

A joke was made about Salem being Jaune’s sister in the V6 intro before everyone knew who she was

None of the writers expected Penny and Winter to have such a bond this volume initially

Miles wanted to portray when Weiss is talking to Willow that she doesn’t really know how to act around an adult with such an adult issue. Since Weiss is quite young (Miles compared it to him having to help an adult with an adult issue when he was 13)

Chapter 9

Featuring Paula (director), Kiersi, Eddy, and Kerry

It was difficult to keep the shots interesting in the dining room

We see Grape-kun and Drunk Mann again this episode

In earlier chapters they made sure to have an orange glow to represent the heating in Mantle since they knew it would be turned off in chapter 8

They wanted to showcase that Ironwood was starting to have doubts, which would later be clearly seen in episode 11

The foot soldiers (AKs) that the Grimm are able to overwhelm in only a few seconds were meant to represent that Atlas wouldn’t provide them with much defense against Grimm because they don’t care enough

Every storyline was coming together in this episode, and it’s tricky to make a setup episode like this not seem like filler

Ruby and Oscar’s awkward interaction came from them both ‘riding the high’ of the moment where it seems like they each have great plans that will go well.

Oscar is starting to tap into some of Ozpin’s memories, as alluded to when he mentions how Atlas is held to a higher standard

Terry the grimm being hit by a fireball (part of a plane I believe) was a call back to Jurassic Park

They struggled a long time with where to put the Neo reveal

Chapter 10

Featuring Conner, Dustin, Kiersi, and Kerry

They felt that if they showed a lot in the first scene of the episode, they wouldn’t have to saturate the background with other fires and crowds.

The shot of Weiss’s knight being summoned and overshadowing Marrow is setting up their fight in C12

When seeing the shots of the enemies infiltrating the kingdom, they didn’t know if they wanted to show Neo and Cinder or Tyrian and Watts first. But they went with Neo and Cinder because it would show that they thought their cover was blown, when it would really be about the other two.

The place Neo and Cinder are staying at is an Atlas ‘high-life’ apartment

They always knew Elm would have a rocket launcher/bazooka, but never got the time needed to show it until now

They had to restructure Mantle a bit to allow the huge elephant to fit in the streets

The main characters working with the Ace Ops in this episode was to make it so things hurt so much more after events in the following one

All the background characters apparently have little backstories as they made sure they didn’t appear in two places at the same time

Ironwood jumps down a ridiculous number of feet to meet Watts. They had to cheat to not make that so obvious as well as say this is animation logic so people working on the shot would stop questioning how he could possibly make it.

Chapter 11

Featuring Kerry, Paula, and Miles

Originally a gravity biome in Amity was going to appear in V3C5. It was going to be Sun and Neptune vs Pyrrha and Nora. It was written, boarded, and ready to go but they realized there wasn’t time for it

This was a hard episode to write. A lot of stuff that needed to happen, and happen in a specific way

Watt’s gun was inspired a 20-shot revolver Kerry saw on Reddit

Ironwood losing another hand represents him losing another part of his humanity (possibly confirming he lost his one organic arm)

The first cut of this episode was 23 minutes and was deemed too long so they had to scale back, but they still felt they kept in everything that was needed to make the episode great

Initially the Tyrian vs Qrow, Robyn, and Clover fight was going to be a chase that turns into a fight that turns into another chase. And Qrow is the only one that could keep up with Tyrian since he can transform into a bird. Qrow would land in front of Tyrian and say ‘that’s enough’ and Tyrian would ask, ‘are you able to talk when you’re a bird or do you have to wait until you’re a person to throw your one-liners?’ (Tyrian asking the real questions here) Tyrian’s lack of self-preservation would be shown even more. He would have run down an alley packed with Grimm and would just trust that he could’ve made it through

The fight with Tyrian was initially going to be more of a Tyrian vs Qrow fight, but Miles loves that they made it a 3 v 1 so it could show off Tyrian’s exceptional skill

The fight was also a callback to the first Tyrian vs Qrow fight, where Ruby tried to be good back up for Qrow but was ineffective. But instead this time have Robyn and Clover be effective and more experienced teammates

Clover is defense, Qrow is offense, and Robyn is picking away at Tyrian with her long-ranged weapon

There was going to be more discussion of where Oscar was at the end of the episode, as well as a whole bit where the Ace Ops and the kids land and they get a hand-written note saying they’ve been compromised instead of getting it via scroll, but it turned out to be too much

The scene of Ironwood talking to RWBY and his turn to being against them was the most important scene in the episode, and something everything in the season had to build up to

Miles said it was about time the two sides met face to face with RWBY meeting Salem

They wanted to make Ironwood’s progression into villainy subtle and make sense

Salem made things personal for Ironwood, so he felt like he had to come up with a solution

They wanted more Cinder and Neo in the volume but had to cut back. But to compensate they had to be instrumental to the collapse of Ironwood (Miles first said collapse of Atlas so wonder if he slipped up)

Chapter 12

Featuring Dustin, Conner, Kiersi, Eddy, and Kerry

They wanted to have a false sense of resolution in the previous episode just to blow everything up here

Eddy handled the Ace Ops vs RWBY and Winter scenes while Kiersi handled the rest

Kerry learned from V5 that having everyone in one room for a fight doesn’t work well

Eddy is a big Weiss stan

Clover has no idea who he’s up against with Tyrian, and thinks of Qrow as the big threat, as well as Tyrian manipulating Qrow

Clover saw both Qrow and Tyrian on the wrong side of the law, so he felt like he had to fight both of them no matter what

They made sure team RWBY can’t just stomp on the Ace Ops, but still show their teamwork. Plus the lack of Clover being there didn’t allow for the team to have a ‘cheat code’

This is another episode they had to trim down in length

Cinder was always going to lay waste to the medical facility and attack Winter

They also wanted to do a Qrow vs Tyrian reprisal

Kerry said he loves Clover

It was crazy for Qrow to meet someone that was a genuinely good person

Chapter 13

Featuring Miles, Kerry, and Eddy

The Neo vs ORNJ fight could have been shorter

At one point they wanted to show Cinder using maiden magic to bring some dead AKs (Atlesian-Knight) back to life to fight Penny (was going to be some sort of puppet joke).

But Miles realized that Cinder could just blow up the room and bust through the walls

Ren is struggling with some heavy emotional stuff that is not resolved at all this volume, but it is hinted there will be a lot more for him next volume.

The writers knew a lot of people wouldn’t be happy with Ren’s attitude this volume. But he still cares about Nora, even if he doesn’t always communicate it well

Miles cried during the voice over session of Fria’s scenes for this episode

They had a lot of talks about how the maiden power would be transferred. They debated if Penny would have to kill Fria.

Originally one pod was going to be broken, with the one with Fria being in tact. But because Penny is a robot, she could ‘remote-interface in’ and get the powers. But that still felt like stealing, and they didn’t want to go that route.

Oscar has matured so much in his role (joking call him Farm Man)

Ironwood is still expecting Oz to show up. He still really wants that guidance

Ironwood arguing with Oscar was the finale scene they wrote this episode

Ironwood feels that he is backed into a corner and is doing the only sensible thing.

Winter was waiting to be the Winter Maiden her whole life, but in a split second she gives it all up

There was one line in Oz’s monologue they were struggling with for a whole day

They loved the idea of ending the volume on almost an identical shot from where they started

Neo’s look after Cinder takes the relic and doesn’t thank Neo for getting it is setting up some things for V8 (probably a betrayal)

Oz came back at that moment because he heard what Oscar said to Ironwood and that made him brave enough to return

Miles reveals that the Grimm whale is based on Monstro from Pinocchio

It is once again said that Volume 8 is the hardest one they had to write so far. Miles seems super excited about it

Volume 8 was made with some fan-input in mind (since it was still being written by the time V7 ended), but Volume 9 will be the first one written in a vacuum

#RWBY #RWBY Volume 7

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stopeatingwhales · 4 years

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stargazing x graham coxon

yes, i’m back again with another graham fic! this was heavily inspired by the submarine ep by alex turner, a very beautiful, lyrical masterpiece which i definitely recommend you listen to if you haven’t already :)

Paring: 90s graham coxon x reader

Warnings: nothing again

Word count: 1.886

Requested by anon, happy late birthday x

༉‧₊˚✧

Summer in England was something everyone craved. The agonisingly horrible winter days where you’d stiffly trek to the train station for work wrapped up with all sorts of things to maintain your body heat were abominable. Having to put on countless amounts of layers just to get a bag of crisps from the shop down the road was a nightmare, and everyone was sick of it. When the short summer months rolled round, we were all either sweating drearily in our homes or practically naked on the streets. As we rarely ever got sun in England, having it out once in a while with a clear blue sky was gratifying. It was a concept, without the crowded beaches or humid restaurants - due to the amount of people cramming in them - the hot days felt eerie. Everyone was out, until the sun went down for hibernation for a few short hours.

I personally loved summer nights the best, especially on my birthday. The streets were empty, the only noise you’re able to hear is the short whistles of cars racing by on a motorway a few miles off. The echoing sound of an insect, perhaps a fly, buzzing quietly as it searches for a new settlement for the evening. The whistling noise of polluted air heaving past my face and occasionally in my eyes. My favourite thing in the world was gazing at the atmosphere as it gradually inked darker, admiring the small specs of light that had progressively gotten brighter - the stars. In summer I felt the stars always shone a little brighter. A little more luminous. I was able to identify any star constellation that ever so slightly patterned the skies; my liking for the heavens had me so hooked I ended up finding out all I could about them.

It was my birthday today, and I had hoped I could spend it with Graham, doing the exact thing I loved most. Sadly enough I was unable to do anything today, due to me having to go to work for the most part and Graham only coming back from his band rehearsals around two or something hours ago. Weekdays were usually like this, us both having practically no communication until the late evenings when he would come home from yet another draining day of recording.

Sighing, I came to my senses and stopped glooming my eyes through the kitchen window. It was 10pm, so the skies were somber enough to identify any ball of gas - my want for going out and watching the stars growing the more I pondered about it. The window was opened slightly, the light breeze scraping the little camouflaged hairs on my arms. It was soft, delicate, almost like the air that escapes someones’ mouth when they’re whispering. Gentle. Fragile. Mellowed. Sometimes the wind would pick up, the soft grazing turning into scruffy drags, forming goosebumps on my forearms. I loved it; I loved how simple howls of the wind formed strong structures on my body. Just like the stars, I could sit and admire nature as a whole for days.

Exiting the kitchen, I dropped my empty coffee mug in the sink. My hand caressed my arms softly, grating on small itches that had assembled on them earlier. Strolling into the living room, I stood by the doorway, biting my tongue as I watched my boyfriend Graham, tune his acoustic. I pondered whether I should leave him to it, he seemed extremely preoccupied by something as he always was - which was music. I knew how much being a famous rock star was debilitating him, especially when he wasn’t the centre of attention, putting tolls on his mental health. I felt for him deeply; watching your bandmates receive much more love than you do would definitely hurt, even so as a lead guitarist.

“Hey, love,” I muttered, my head leaning on the door frame. I watched his head jolt up; he didn’t hear my quiet footsteps to the entrance of the room. “Hehe sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you,”

He smiled slightly, echoing a small ‘hey’, before carrying on with his same doings. I bit my lip in thought, wondering whether I should say something or leave the room to let him do his thing.

When about five minutes - which felt like two hours - passed by, I chose to speak up. “Wanna go and watch the stars for a bit?” I asked, seeing his head rise up from his instrument once again. God, his eyes are so alluring.

It was clear there was a lot on his mind, and the question lingering in the room peppered in his mind until he spoke up. “Yeah alright,” he answered, nodding also. Shifting his guitar to stand on the arm of the sofa he was sitting on, he pushed it away from his body, standing up. He stretched his arms out slightly, as he had been fixated in that same position for god knows how long. He seemed tired, exhausted perhaps, causing a small feeling of guilt to pit in my stomach, my mind forcing myself to push past it quickly.

A small smile formed on my mouth as I marvelled at his appearance. His hair was just the right amount of messiness, it framing his face perfectly. His eyes softly squinted together, ultimately showing that he was making the most out of his stretch. His lips, forced together to stifle a yawn, in an attempt to hide his tiredness from me. His features were so enthralling. He was always so graceful, my body physically incapable of understanding why he found himself ugly; all he seems to ever be is the most graceful of them all.

“Come on then,” he said, pushing my body lightly, helping me gain my consciousness again. “You always zone out,” he laughed, resulting in me rolling my eyes at his remark. The only reason I seem to space out so much is because of you, Graham. You and your flawless beauty.

After we left the flat, we began walking up the stairs to the roof of the building. My pace was slightly quicker than Graham’s - my excitement had consumed me entirely. I grabbed hold of his hand, trying to pull him up as I swept the endless amounts of steps, feeling the grip of his palm tighten around my hand as I paced faster. Our flat was nearer to the bottom of the building, meaning the jog up to the top was usually a tiresome one. My legs were beginning to give out, but I never halted. The adrenaline rushed through my veins - I felt as if I was chasing for the stars, and I was chasing them with the one person I adored most.

Eventually, we managed to reach the roof, both of us inevitably out of gasping for air. My gaze turned to him, our eyes connecting as we stared at each other wholeheartedly. I tiredly beamed at him, him exchanging the same, as my view shifted to lock eyes with the stars. I let out a breathy sigh of satisfaction; we hadn’t done this together in ages, and I missed having endless conversations about whatever escaped our mouths. He was truly a remarkable person to be around, and I was ever so grateful to be able to call him my boyfriend.

I proceed to lay on the ground, not caring whether any trace of dirt had entwined in my locks. My eyes fixated on the sky above me, the tired smile stilled on my face. I watched Graham do the same through my peripheral, lying down close to me, our arms touching. Squeezing up to him, I grabbed the hand that was touching mine gently, and cradled it with both my hands on my stomach. I ran my index fingers over every vein, every bump of a bone, every piece of skin I could mount to. “Your hands are so beautiful,” I mumbled.

Graham didn’t reply. Instead, he bit his top lip and blushed. I knew he wasn’t going to answer, and I didn’t want him to; I wanted to savour the moment as it was. We rarely were able to just have the clocks stop for a second, not care about what time it was, or whether we had to sleep early for our jobs the following day. It’s like the summer, you never know when you were able to just sit there and let the sun bake you, the unexpected clouds seaming over you just as you thought you had time to yourself.

Exhaling softly, I shifted my gaze to the twinkling night sky. The darkened colour of the empyrean, glinted with small dazzles of light, fell over me as I drew my eyes to the moon. I stared at it, analysing the aged, grey patterns that decorated it on the only face that was known to man. “I missed this,” I heaved, grabbing hold of his hand again, this time intertwining our fingers together. I felt Graham’s eyes on me, but I didn’t budge. The relishing feeling of his stare roast my body and my face together evoked a sense of warmth within me, something I had never felt before with anyone, but him.

The silence that fell upon us spoke for itself. It wasn’t a disturbing, unsavory one, it was a blissful, comforting one. It was the kind of silence you could fall asleep to, the silence you feel safe and enclosed by. It was the epiphany of actions speaking louder than words, and I absolutely adored it.

“Y/n, can I tell you something?” Graham asked, causing me to lock eyes with him.

“Of course you can,”

He breathed in for a few seconds, before exhaling a breath that was longly needed for an escape. I smiled at him, his beautiful globes of mercury connecting with mine. “I love you more than life,” he whispered, cradling my face in his hands. I smiled at him dearly, my eyes filled entirely with nothing but adoration for him.

Copying his actions, I held his face with my small palms. My eyes tearing up as his words repeated countless amounts of times in my head. “Don’t love anything more than life,” I muttered, taking a brief moment to delight the moment before nonchalantly reaching to kiss his pretty lips. I grasped hold of him like a candy tasting so divine you suck on it to have the sensational taste for longer. The feeling of our mouths colliding sparked thrills throughout my entire body. The way our tongues brushed against one anothers, so sweet it turned bitter.

We both pulled away out of breath, our eyes now wide open, staring into each others’ souls. I felt completely and utterly exposed to him in all ways possible, like my shield of clothing was not enough for him to not see the miles of skin laid underneath. I admired him, my mouth wide open as I panted for oxygen to fill my throat from the poisonous kiss. Everyday I fell more and more in love with this man, words unable to explain how much he impacted my life for the better.

“Happy birthday,” he said, smiling with that toothy smile of his. We both turned to gape at the skies once again, hugging each others’ bodies.

#graham coxon x reader #graham coxon #damon albarn #alex james #dave rowntree #blur #britpop #90s #writing #imagine #smut #fluff

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fizzingwizard · 4 years

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Tumblr sucks so I had to post this twice but you should still read it because I had a lot of fun writing it xD Yamato is so easy to tease omg

Today’s Digimon Adventure: 2020 episode is entitled, “Time To Bring Back Visual Kei Bands,” because that’s pretty much where WereGarurumon belongs. I know what you’re thinking, he’s a wolf man in jeans with a kind of grungy rock n roll cowboy theme, how is that visual kei?

My friend, it’s all about the NAILS.

Those perfectly manicured, PINK freaking nails.

Tto start I’ll say this episode lowers the tension significantly compared to previous ones. That’s to be expected, and doesn’t mean it’s boring. It does a lot - it lets us confirm some things about Yamato, and a couple things about Sora and Jou in relation to him as well. It is otherwise a carbon copy of episode 8 in terms of story arc. More below as usual

So this ep is Yamato/Sora/Jou main inside a Taichi/Koushirou/Mimi sandwich.

We are starting to see more of Mimi Herself, complaining and whining about the unfairness of it all. Taichi appears to have scaled this wall by himself and Mimi’s like “YOU HAVE TOO MUCH ENERGY, YOU’LL PUT THE ENERGIZER BUNNY OUT OF A JOB, DO YOU WANT TO BE RESPONSIBLE FOR HOMELESS BUNNIES?? HE HAS TO PROVIDE FOR HIS FAMILY”

Adding salt to the wound, Koushirou then zips up the wall like this..

zip!

The good thing about Mimi is, though she’s emotional, it’s easy to lift her spirits. She’s very in the moment. And fortunate that she has a partner who is both very patient and useful in these circumstances.

wheeeeee

Meanwhile the slightly-less-energetic group has put their heads together and decided to fly first class to their destination. I would ask where they got the basket but I’m sure I’d get the same answer as Taichi’s raft from episode 4 and Jou’s pergola from episode 7: these kids are extremely good at woodcraft and speedy

(or maybe Sora just had a giant basket in her bag, which we all understand by now is really a Bag of Holding)

While airborne they are Attacked!!! by SandYanmamon and not one but two tornadoes.

Jou: Wonderful!

(for a hot second there I mistook this for Birdramon’s line and was like “??? birdramon’s unusually sarcastic today” but of course it’s the king of morbid humor kido jou)

These Kyaromon appear out of nowhere to show off their dramatic eyeliner. Work it baby

Just when you think SandYanmamon and TWO FREAKING TORNADOES are enough, turns out there’s another threat lurking below the sand for the sole purpose of reminding us yet again “Pokemon this is not!”

SandYanmamon: Aaaaaaahhh nooooooooo i had so much living left to doooo heeeelp mommyyyyyyyyy

NOT IN FRONT OF THE CHILD YOU MONSTER!!!

Cool-headed Yamato figures out that the new monster is able to track their movements under the sand. He sends the others away while he stays behind to hold off the bad guy.

The Kyaromon lead them to a cave where they meet...

ewww uuggghh noooo I hate them aaaahh make it stoppp

and also Neemon! and I’m just going to assume this is a parallel universe version of Frontier’s Neemon because it tickles me to think this is what he actually sounds and acts like and is just riding Bokumon out of pure spite

also Bearmon’s cap says “Bears.” Not bear, bears plural. I believe he’s an outcast former member of the Gummy Bears.

The Labramon look like Rainbow Brite rejects

Pictured above: First lovers’ tiff!

Neemon doesn’t know about the holy Digimon and tells the kids he is leading his group of perfectly helpless Digimon across the monster-infested desert because of the dark forces taking over everywhere. They will seek asylum with Leomon! We got our first mention of Leomon! Quick, cast your bets, how long till he dies? My guess is sooner rather than later because this seems like the kind of show that likes to kill your darlings.

Sora takes one look at this pathetic group and goes “We must go with them to protect them!” conveniently forgetting that she just got her ass kicked, but hey it’s the thought that counts

Yamato is quick to disagree.

Yamato: Did you forget that I stayed behind while you RAN AWAY? When you say let’s protect them, you mean I’M gonna be protecting them, right? RIGHT? That’s what you mean RIGHT??

(he thinks, but doesn’t say. that wouldn’t be Cool)

Yamato doesn’t want to lose sight of their mission, which is to fix things in their home world. He’s already at his limit hanging out with other human children who don’t know what they’re doing, he doesn’t want to be slowed down by freaking Bearmon. Wishy-washy Jou is like “Eh, either way sounds like death and torment to me, so...”

The interesting thing to me here is that no one’s upset. A bit surprised, I think, but Sora just stands her ground, Jou wibbles but eventually gets pumped up enough by Gomamon to decide to help her. They don’t even try much to stop Yamato from leaving which I think is what surprised me the most. I would have expected at least a vibe more like “We shouldn’t split up!” or something. If Taichi were there, maybe we’d have seen more conflict... but I’m really not sure. So far, conflict among the kids has been very low key. Even last week, the first time we saw Taichi and Yamato butt heads, to the other kids it was shocking but to a 99 Adventurer like me it was barely a kerfluffle xP

Well, anyway, the result is Sora and Jou stay with Neemon, and Yamato goes off on his own, and there is surprisingly little bad blood about any of this. They are all just getting to know each other though, so maybe that loyalty’s not quite expected yet.

Same as episode 8, Gabumon hints that there’s more to Yamato’s behavior than he lets on. He’s not just coldly abandoning his friends... except that he totally is >_> (As an adult, I don’t exactly think Yamato is wrong. I’d be more likely to agree with him than the others probably xP But these are children in a show for children, so Protecting Others and Following Your Feelings get a boost over cool rationale.)

Gabumon says Yamato should open up to the other kids. YEAH RIGHT. Yamato says “You’re all I need.” AWWWWWWWWW this wont backfire on them in a way that will wrench out my heart and tear it to a million pieces in forty episodes or so, no way

Ikkakumon becomes a Sand Boat while Birdramon covers the sky. At first I was like “hey! not a bad plan!” If they can help Neemon’s group get across the desert faster, it will be a big help even if they can’t take them further.

Of course, first they have to deal with the SandYanmamon.

Ikkakumon: Why does everyone go straight for the horn!?!

Oh, and also the two tornadoes.

Sora, standing on Birdramon’s leg: don’t look down don’t look down don’t look down

And now Sora’s on fire! That is it, I’m headcanoning it that the kids are basically invulnerable as long as they are touching their partners. THERE’S JUST NO EXPLAINING THIS

The flaming elementary school child does well until her partner is snared by the same monster from before, who turns out to be Scorpiomon. But this ain’t your momma’s Scorpimon from 99 Adventure, who was really Anomalocarimon but that was too hard to expect kids to say. This is the real Scorpiomon who is much scarier.

All of a sudden, from above!

ACTION LINES!!!

Yamato and Garurumon, both physically incapable of doing anything normally when there is a cooler, more awesome method available, drop into the battle from the air and start burning shit up.

They stand, bodies licked by blue flame, piercing eyes bright with the fever of battle, the sound of swooning fan girls echoing into the night

Garurumon does his best but Scorpiomon is a level higher so, duh, he doesn’t stand much of a chance. WHAT WILL OUR HERO DO.

Well, first, same as in episode 8, he flashes back to each of his newfound friends, gaining strength from their memory. Yamato is so sentimental it Hurts

Then his mind flashes to someone else...

... his favorite bobble head doll. No wait, that’s his round-headed baby brother, Charlie Brown.

he is infused with the power of Friendship!!!!!!!

Garurumon: What... is this feeling... so passionate... so... powerful... FFFRIENDSHIPPPPPP IS MAGIC

He then evolves into a brony into a furry in the coolest freakiest way he knows how.

WereGarurumon is basically everything the creators thought little boys like besides dinosaurs (because Taichi’s got that one covered) thrown together to make the ultimate little boy dream action figure: wolves, leather, hardware, piercings, brass knuckles, belts, skulls, scars, dog tags, and fuchsia stiletto nails

Ikkakumon: Sugoi... so shiny... oooh... blinding me...

WereGarurumon kicks Scorpiomon’s ass, it’s a cool battle scenes complete with kicks so fast his foot appears detached from his body. He then gives Yamato thumbs up.

Yamato: With nails like those the brass knuckles are kind of overkill...

Yamato dodges apologizing for going off on his own like that by saying he only came back because it’d be useful to him to have the others around as a decoy. Jou’s like FRIGGING DECOYS AGAIN??

But his dedication to remaining cool and aloof falters and he ends up telling them he’s just extra pressured to get their mission handled because he has a little brother, Takeru, living in Tokyo who is probably very scared stuck in the blackout. Sora and Jou are like “Oh, that makes sense, that’s why you’re so high strung.” They don’t point out the obvious, which is that they also have families affected by the blackout... >_>

Jou passionately thanks Yamato for being so forthcoming so early in the season and looks forward to telling Yamato about himself in the future.

The others: “But we already know all about you.”

Jou: “But HE doesn’t!”

xD look forward to it, Yamato...

It’s episode 11 and Yamato can already smile like this... I had to cap it.

Yamato: Ahh, I’m finally getting used to wearing this purple shirt. Still can’t get quite suppress the urge to cut off the sleeves though...

The other slice of bread completes our sandwich when we shoot back briefly to Taichi/Koushirou/Mimi’s group.

Taichi gets annoyed with Koushirou for the first time because of how much time Koushirou spends taking pictures of everything. Koushirou is that kid on the museum field trip who holds up the entire class reading every last word on the exhibit plaques while everyone else groans ‘cmon dude I wanna get to the dinosaurs before we go extinct too!!’

fyi I, Fizzing Wizard, was and am that slow ass kid

Mimi’s even more impatient than Taichi and in her boredom she starts touching things, because she’s never seen The Mummy.

IT’S A TRAP!!!

lol

Next ep’s trailer includes:

Andromon!!!

And Lillymon!!!

Oprah voice: You get a Perfect level and you get a Perfect level and you get a Perfect level and you get-

Yeah so, clearly everyone’s gonna get to Perfect level much quicker than in 99 Adventure, which again, it’s good they’re mixing things up. The question is, what’s next? My guess is down the line everyone will get Ultimate levels and of course, at some point we’ll see Omegamon. I wonder if there will be other Jogress possibilities? Just because it’s hard to believe evolution will stop being important, but if they’re going through both Adult and Perfect so fast it doesn’t leave much left for the rest of the season...

I give this ep a 5.5/10 for being basically a remix of episode 8, and I’m looking forward to getting new stuff for Yamato eventually. Next week’s looking to be Mimi-centric if Lillymon’s any indication, but I’ve got my fingers crossed for a few Taishiro moments anyway.

#digimon adventure 2020 #digimon adventure reboot #digimon psi #psi spoilers #digimon #fizz watches digimon 2020

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juliaisabellphoto · 3 years

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My 2020 Albums of the Year

Never requested, always provided. Here are my favorites of 2020. Here’s the playlist.

The Secret Sisters, Saturn Return

As soon as I saw “Water Witch, featuring Brandi Carlile” on this tracklist I knew that the Secret Sisters would be a favorite of 2020. In February, I was staying with a friend in Nashville and she mentioned them as a local favorite, and when I stopped at Grimey’s to shop for records I came upon a signed copy of “Saturn Return.” I had never heard the Secret Sisters before, but there is nobody I trust more to recommend music than this Nashville friend of mine, so I bought it. I made no mistake here: this record blew me away. The soft, soulful, lullaby of “Healer in the Sky” pulled me through the pain of the first month of quarantine and soothed me as the world was turned upside down. In reading more on the record, this seems to have been the point: they say, “this album is a reflection of us coming to terms with how to find our power in the face of an unfair world… our hope is that women can feel less alone in their journey through the modern world.” There is something in the caramel-thick sweetness of these sisters’ voices that makes a listener feel as though they’ve been bewitched into calm. When I think of this album, I think of the cross-country drive I took at the beginning of the pandemic to make my way home and the happy moments that can be found in darkness. No album touched my heart this year in the way that “Saturn Return” did.

Taylor Swift, Folklore and Evermore

Taylor Swift… can even be said? Somehow, while we all sat on our couches in quarantine, this woman created not one but two musical masterpieces. She begins “the 1” by stating “I’m doin good, I’m on some new shit,” and that says a lot about the album as a whole. She created the 2020 we all wish we experienced: soft, sweet, and gentle. Listening to Folklore feels like visiting a cabin in the woods, with a fireplace well lit. Swift tells winding stories of love, hardship, and mystery and tenderly walks us through the forest of her imagination. This magical feeling was amplified by her release of The Long Pond Studio Sessions, a film in which Swift, Jack Antonoff, and Aaron Dessner finally play the album together for the first time after recording it entirely remotely. The setting matches the sound: they play in an album in the middle of the woods, cozy and hidden from the snow. Evermore cuts through the delicate ice of Folklore: it is the color to Folklore’s black and white. Swift combines the soft folk sound of “willow” with some of her country and Americana roots in “no body, no crime,” drawing us in once again. She includes Bon Iver singing in his lower register in Folklore and then in his falsetto in Evermore: two sides of the same magic coin. The work in these two albums is Swift’s strongest ever, and solidifies the fact that no modern artist can really reach her.

Chris Stapleton, Starting Over

Following a three-year hiatus, all lovers of southern rock deeply needed a Chris Stapleton album. In “Starting Over,” Stapleton yet again does what he does best: combines his unique whiskey-tinged growl with the best lyricism present in country music today. This record can’t be captured in any singular fashion, neither musically nor emotionally. The title track sets a high bar for the rest of the record with a reflection on re-remembering what really matters, a message certainly relevant for this turbulent year. Stapleton’s typical outlaw-country brand is present in full with “Devil Always Made Me Think Twice,” “Arkansas,” and “Hillbilly Blood,” but other songs take him in a completely new stylistic direction. “Maggie’s Song” takes on a very classic old-time country feel, as Stapleton weaves sweet and simple stories as he processes the loss of his pup. He harnesses the energy of the Chicks as he angrily lambasts the perpetrators of the 2017 mass shooting at Route 91. The song is a Stapleton-sponsored judgment day reckoning, including the cacophonic sound of a crowd in panic and the shrieks of a gospel choir. In contrast with this energetic high, Stapleton goes deep into his blues side by finally releasing “You Should Probably Leave,” a song he has been sitting on for six years. This one feels just right to sway around the kitchen to. With each listen to “Starting Over” I find new lyrics to write down and remember, new sounds to love.

Bad Bunny, YHLQMDLG

Bad Bunny. Our unproblematic reggaeton prince. In the wake of his many popular features and his collaborative album with J Balvin, Bad Bunny makes it clear that it is time for Balvin to share the throne of popular reggaeton. He features the original reggaeton king Daddy Yankee in “La Santa,” paying tribute to the very classic reggaeton style before mixing it and transcending beyond the classics in the following tracks. “Yo Perreo Sola” is the album’s standout track, accompanied by my favorite music video of 2020. The song is an ode to gender equality and the destruction of the patriarchal norms contributing to gender-based violence. “Yo Perreo Sola,” meaning “I twerk alone,” sets the overarching theme of consent present throughout the song’s lyrics. In the video, Benito’s backdrop references the Argentinian-born “Ni Una Menos” movement, a now global movement against gender-based violence. As if this wasn’t enough to make you adore him, the video further extends its activism to the LGBTQ community, with Benito appearing in full drag, in his normal attire, and at some points held in chains by women. He makes a statement about sexuality and gender expression in the video, twerking solo. The other jawdropper track on YHLQMDLG is Safaera, a perfect display of Bad Bunny’s skill in expanding the scope of reggaeton as a genre. In the same thirty seconds of the song, he subtly samples both “Could You Be Loved” by Bob Marley and the Wailers and Missy Elliot’s “Get Ya Freak On” - a segment I just can’t get out of my head. Bad Bunny’s prowess on this record is rounded out with the aggressive and prideful “P FKN R.” What a masterpiece.

Mac Miller, Circles

A posthumous record that never should have been posthumous. A companion-piece to Mac’s 2018 record “Swimming,” Circles takes a similar tone, one of resilience through pain. The title track serves as a somber introduction, followed by the funk energy of “Complicated” and the GO:OD AM energy of “Blue World.” The song that really got to me, and many other fans of Mac, was “Good News.” It is the pinnacle of Mac’s musical insight and talent. The melody matches the melancholy of the track, as Mac sings of his desire for time and space. The melancholy is matched in “Everybody” with the lines about death feeling particularly haunting in the wake of Miller’s accidental overdose. Somehow, Miller wrote the perfect eulogy for himself prior to his passing, one that will live in the hearts of his fans forever.

Kali Uchis, Sin Miedo (del Amor y Otros Demonios) ∞

I’m not quite sure what to call this record. If I just listened to “la luna enamorada,” a cover of a classic Cuban bolero, I would call it gorgeous. If I just listened to “fue mejor” featuring PARTYNEXTDOOR or “quiero sentirme bien,” I would call it sexy. If I just listened to “vaya con dios,” I would think she wrote the theme music for the next James Bond film. The bottom line of the record is Uchis’ absolute stunning use of her upper register. She hits notes that “Isolation” never would have foreshadowed, painting a dreamland for any listener. She slides back into the energy of her sophomore album in “telepatia,” but adds in moments of her new sound. She incorporates a slower reggaeton beat into no eres tu (soy yo), and dives into a heavier reggaeton sound in te pongo mal (prendelo.) My personal favorite of the record is “aqui yo mando!” with Rico Nasty: it is the perfect display of Uchis’ unique upper register combined with Rico’s trap style. Anyone passing this record up for another “Isolation” listen is missing out.

FLETCHER, The S(ex) Tapes

This record has a story like no other, coming from a woman like no other. This EP was recorded while Fletcher quarantined with her ex-girlfriend, who also happened to film all of the music videos for it. It is this messiness that makes The S(ex) Tapes absolute magic. Fletcher’s own description of the name of the release explains the situation best: “A sex tape is someone being captured in their most vulnerable, wildest, rawest form, and my ex has always captured me that way.” She captures all of the feelings of a breakup with someone you still love deeply, and the relationship relapse that comes with moving past those feelings. Fletcher’s special ability comes in representing these deeply painful experiences in an uplifting manner: this is a sexy pop EP meant to be danced to. Fletcher simultaneously validates all of the emotional tumult, but subtly nudges the listener toward blissful reckless abandon. It almost makes me wish I had a breakup to go through! The abrasive apathy of “Shh… Don’t Say It” and the flippant, angry vulnerability of “Bitter” are paired perfectly with Fletcher’s raw brand of distortion. In an interview with Nylon, Fletcher speaks to this: “Listen, I've done my fair share of just straight-up sad, crying in your bed music. I'm still going through shit, but I want to bop to it. We can still be emo and want to twerk at the same time.” Yes, Fletcher, we do.

Halsey, Manic

Prior to 2020, I wasn’t Halsey’s biggest fan. I wouldn’t have even called myself a fan. I just wasn’t that excited by her music. “I’m Not Mad” was the song that triggered a 180 for me. The heavy, dissonant kick of the drums and her raw, angry lyricism drew me in without hesitation. I suppose this was just the push I needed to fall in love with the rest of her music: the songs with similar bite, “Without Me” and “killing boys,” and the more raw side of the record in “You should be sad,” “929,” and “Graveyard.” Her vulnerability is so much of what makes this record perfect. The album fully made sense to me when I listened to her podcast feature on “Armchair Expert” with Dax Shepard. In it, she talks through the time period covered by the record and gives context to her powerful lyricism. “Manic” is a story of chasing someone she loved into drug-fueled oblivion, and then finally finding the power to leave. The album is brimming with this power, and I just can’t turn it off.

HAIM, Women In Music Pt. III

HAIM is THE soft rock band of the modern era.Women In Music Pt. III, their most mature album yet, solidified this opinion for me in a way that I didn’t expect. There is so much to be said for this record: it is innovative and skilled, with the perfect balance of softness and hardness. Though the record is one of pain and trauma, you wouldn’t know it purely from its melodies. “Don’t Wanna” is a very classic HAIM pop rock number, and “The Steps” follows suit making frustration fun to dance to. Though one may not notice at first, in this record HAIM dives deeper than ever before. “Now I’m In It” does a phenomenal job of sonically representing the feeling of being completely and utterly overwhelmed. “I Know Alone” is a beautifully intimate rainy-day account of Danielle’s struggle with depression. Then comes “3AM” - a lighthearted song about a booty call with Thundercat-type bass and an R&B vibe - just in case you didn’t already know how much range these three sisters have. Everything about this record is filled with talent.

Phoebe Bridgers, Punisher

Only Phoebe Bridgers could write a song about murdering a skinhead and fill it with nostalgia. “Garden Song,” the leading single preceding “Punisher,” foreshadowed a record that is just so very Phoebe: melancholy, vulnerable, and heart-wrenching. The eagerly awaited album certainly followed suit, with typical sad ballads “Halloween” and “Moon Song” played alongside more raucous, Better Oblivion Community Center-esque songs such as “Kyoto” and “ICU.” She goes bluegrass on “Graceland Too” with banjo, violin, and layered harmonies from boygenius collaborators Lucy Dacus and Julien Baker. In “Punisher,” Bridgers shares with us the wistful catharsis that she is so very talented at creating.

Noah Cyrus, THE END OF EVERYTHING

I always underestimated Miley’s little sister, but here I am writing about her EP before I write about Miley’s in my end of the year roundup. Every piece in this record gave me chills: Cyrus’ lower register allows her to access a somber kind of ballad that I just can’t get enough of. The record starts off at a peak with the slow burn of “Ghost” and somehow manages to get even better with “I Got So High That I Saw Jesus.” This powerful song, even better in the live version where Miley joins her younger sister, builds into an almost gospel-like ode to the idea that everything will be okay. “July,” the single featuring Leon Bridges that pushed Cyrus into the national spotlight, stands as the most beautifully layered song of the EP. The soft guitar picking and choral sound complement Cyrus’ upper register. The whole record, extending through the closing title track, is a comforting, soft emotional analgesic for 2020.

The Chicks, Gaslighter

This record is gorgeous. It is painful. The feelings Natalie Maines expresses in this record are feelings I have felt far too deeply in personal relationships, and they also are feelings everyone is feeling globally in 2020. “Gaslighter” is just straight up fun, a perfect extension of the Chicks’ energy found in “Goodbye Earl” and other older revenge numbers (but with an extra poppy Jack Antonoff twist this time.) “Tights On My Boat” is bitter, funny, and shows off Maines’ upper register with stripped guitar. “Sleep at Night” musically and lyrically embodies the pain of being betrayed. “Julianna Calm Down” is a stunning ballad of female resilience. “Texas Man” perfectly captures the bubbly feeling of moving on. “For Her” and “March March” fit in with the frustrated, betrayed, power-centered theme of the record in a very different way. The Chicks’ dualistic ability to discuss her ex-husband’s cheating alongside the band’s political views is what makes the record special: not only are we watching a woman try to move on and develop her personal strength, but we are also seeing this personal strength harnessed for political impact. They simultaneously denounce the abuse of power in both politics and relationships, while reclaiming that power for themselves in standing up for what they believe in. How very Chicks of them.

Dua Lipa, Future Nostalgia

Dua motherfucking Lipa. This woman would have been the official owner of 2020 had we been able to dance to this record at bars and clubs. This was proven ten times over by the success of the album’s first single, “Don’t Start Now,” a song that is absolutely the MOST fun. Or so I thought… until I heard “Physical,” “Levitating,” and “Break My Heart.” What poor timing for such a phenomenal dance record, but at least she gave the people some great material for Tik Tok dances! All COVID-dance-related concerns aside, this is a really well done sophomore album for Dua Lipa. The funk elements of the album most clearly seen in “Levitating” elevate Dua’s brand of pop to a new level. The all gas no brakes nature of this dance-pop record works wonders for her - she knows what the people want from her, and she delivers.

Megan Thee Stallion, Good News

THIS! RECORD! If WAP could be an album of the year, it would be, but it’s a standalone single and Megan Thee Stallion proceeded to release the next best thing. The explosion of Megan Thee Stallion has been a pleasure to watch in 2020, with both WAP and Savage leaving the charge. With an artist like her, it’s easy to get lost in the smash hits and ignore the prolific nature of her work. “Good News” is an immaculate rap album, brimming with sass and defiant bad bitch energy. “Shots Fired” kicks off the album with a Biggie sample and a diss to the man who shot her in the foot earlier in the year, personally my favorite track of the record. Other highlights of the record include “Don’t Stop” with a Young Thug feature, “Body” which is now a Tik Tok staple, and “What’s New.” Perhaps the most impressive work Megan does on “Good News” is “Girls in the Hood,” a rework of Eazy-E’s Boyz-N-The-Hood. She inverts the classic misogyny of the original song by emphasizing her control over men like Eazy-E in an indignant assertion of female power. This embodies Megan Thee Stallion’s essence: busting in on a male industry and making her presence known.

Rico Nasty, Nightmare Vacation

Nobody does it like Rico Nasty, and I’m convinced nobody ever will. I saw a New York Times headline titled “Can the Mainstream Catch Up to Rico Nasty?” the other day and I think the answer is a firm no. Rico is abrasive, rude, and outside the box in the absolute best way. Need an album to slap in the car when you’re feeling like a bad bitch? This. is. it. The record kicks off with “Candy,” a song with a wild beat and the iconic chorus line “Call me crazy, but you can never call me broke.” Following is a Don Toliver and Gucci Mane feature in “Don’t Like Me,” a song that truly should have hit the mainstream by now. She gets back to her signature scream-rap in “STFU” and “OHFR.” “OHFR” is the confident standout of the album, along with the reworked re-release of “Smack a Bitch,” making it clear that Rico Nasty is not a woman to be fucked with. In “Back and Forth” with Amine, Rico steps into Amine’s “Limbo” style and does it well. The record’s second single “Own It” is a more classic club banger that unfortunately didn’t get to see the dark of night in any clubs this year. Even if the mainstream never catches up to Rico Nasty, I’ll be following along with her self-labelled “sugar trap.”

Ariana Grande, Positions

I mean, duh. Ariana just doesn’t miss. She surprised everyone with this album’s release in Fall 2020, displaying the bliss of her relationship with later-confirmed fiance. She goes dirtier than usual in the sex-centered “34+35” and “nasty,” rounding the record out with the Craig David-reminiscent “positions.” Ariana allows herself to lust for someone and even love for them in these three, but defaults to her brimming self-confidence in “just like magic” and “west side.” The album is more R&B than pop at times, with the peak of this style visible in the groove of “my hair” and the Mariah Carey ballad-like nature of “pov.” Each album, Grande shifts just a little bit, keeping us attached: “Sweetener”’s cotton-candy pop, the savage pop-trap of “thank u, next,” and the R&B conclusion of the spectrum with Positions.

Miley Cyrus, Plastic Hearts

This year I anticipated no record more than I did “Plastic Hearts.” Its leading single, “Midnight Sky,” described by Pitchfork as a “cocaine-dusted disco track,” channels Stevie Nicks’ eighties rock-pop era in the absolute best way. Apparently this opinion was even picked up by Stevie herself, as the two collaborated on a mash-up of “Midnight Sky” and Stevie’s “Edge of Seventeen” (the excitement from which nearly led to my passing away, by the way.) Cyrus’ voice is in the perfect place on this record, with “Plastic Hearts” emphasizing her rasp and making me want to spin around a room. She dips into the pop realm in “Prisoner” with Dua Lipa, a song that Lipa clearly influences with an unforgettably sexy music video. Every song is different on this record: “Gimme What I Want” channels the grinding rock sound of Nine Inch Nails, “Bad Karma” allows Joan Jett’s punchy style to run the show, and she slips on the shoes of Billy Idol in their collaboration, Night Crawling. Somehow, Miley manages to wear the shoes well, and 80s copycat record or not, I can’t stop listening. “Never Be Me” is where she shines most deeply, baring her soul, the complicated nature of her past few years’ journey, and her knowledge of who she is and always will be for the world to hear. I’m not sure if I’m blinded to the album’s flaws by my absolute and complete love for everything about Miley’s current persona, but I am a huge fan.

Glass Animals, Dreamland

The sound of this album is such a blissful respite! Glass Animals gives us the fun and funky techno-pop that they always do, but dive into personal lyricism in a way that they never have before. Many of the songs actually have a storyline (an intentionally rare feat for Dave Bayley, first broken with the incredible “Agnes” on their last album.) This record explores trauma and pain in “Domestic Bliss” and “It’s All So Incredibly Loud,” Bayley using the soft sides of his voice to express pained desperation. The boisterous energy of the past two records is not forgotten in Dreamland’s intimacy, however: “Hot Sugar,” “Tokyo Drifting,” and “Space Ghost Coast To Coast” do the trick. “Space Ghost Coast To Coast” is the most intriguing song on the record: at first listen, I had absolutely no idea what Dave was discussing and assumed it was just his typical neuroscience-inspired ear-candy. Upon a deeper dive, the song addresses the factors that encouraged Dave’s childhood friend to bring a gun to school. He disguises a discussion of the risk factors involved in school shootings within his flowery, figurative linguistic excellence. This duality of blissful melody and solemn subject matter is the magic of Glass Animals.

Empress Of, I’m Your Empress Of

This album is an emotional electro-pop masterpiece. This record meditates on the feelings felt in the wake of a relationship’s end. She begins the album with a quote from her mother about the reality and value of struggle, then launching into a synth-filled storm of missing someone. “Love Is A Drug” is the album’s next fun dance track, addressing the addictive quality of touch after you lose someone you love and embodying the urgency of the feeling. She takes a more somber tone with the influence of Jim-E Stack in “U Give It Up,” incorporating quotes from her mother about the difficulty of womanhood and reminiscing on love lost. In “Should’ve,” the post-relationship regret is palpable in her vocal tone and production, and in “Maybe This Time” she contemplates this pain. In “Give Me Another Chance,” her emotions swing the other way, with a bouncing dance beat and pleading vocals. The album concludes with the heartfelt and pain-filled “Hold Me Like Water” and the dissonant “Awful,” leaving the listener to meditate on the mood swings of a broken relationship.

Tame Impala, The Slow Rush

This album came out so early in 2020 that it already feels like a vintage piece of music. Perhaps that was the point. Although “The Slow Rush” had a hard time living up to Kevin Parker’s last epic masterpiece “Currents,” it was the fix many fans like myself needed after five years without an LP. “Borderline,” the single that allowed anticipation of the album to build, stands out as one of the most essentially Parker tracks of the record. He introduces a little Toro y Moi style funk in “Is It True,” and highlights his voice more than usual in “Lost In Yesterday.” “Posthumous Forgiveness” builds in the wonderfully dissonant fashion that fans learned to love through “Eventually.” The bass track on “Glimmer” is so good that I never even noticed it had nearly no lyrics. This record is not groundbreaking by any standards in the way that “Currents” was, but it is intentionally jubilant and energetic in a way that still feels good. Even if he doesn’t shatter any expectations in “The Slow Rush,” Tame Impala’s tracklist still makes the perfect sunset companion.

Joji, Nectar

Joji’s “Nectar” is just that: sweet R&B nectar, from the minute the first track plays. Joji’s work here is not in the individual tracks, but in the sonic experience he creates with the album as a whole. This is not an album to pick out singles from: it is a full cinematic mood adjustment. Maybe it’s the weed I smoked when I first listened, but the record feels like a wonderful progression of gentle yet rhythmic R&B songs. The transition from the soft and contemplative “MODUS” to the more upbeat trap-infused “Tick Tock” to the full R&B ballad “Daylight” featuring Diplo raises the listener’s energy gradually to a crescendo. “Run” is a gorgeous and sad confessional of disappointment, and “Sanctuary” follows as a soft and uplifting analgesic to that pain. “Pretty Boy” and “777” mark the more upbeat section of the record, filled with Joji’s accounts of living far too fast. The tracks of this record all bleed into each other seamlessly, mixing pain and confidence in an emotional rollercoaster.

Amine, Limbo

My journey to being an Amine fan started with “Caroline,” ended with “Heebiejeebies,” and started back up again when he found depth in “ONEPOINTFIVE.” His 2020 release is exactly why I came around to his music yet again. The record is soulful and fun, with the flute and cocky lyrics in “Woodlawn” and the funky beat and Young Thug feature of “Compensating.” The two songs I absolutely can’t stop listening to however, are “Can’t Decide” and “Becky.” “Can’t Decide” highlights Amine’s singing voice and dips away from rap and trap into the more traditional R&B realm. “Becky” is an intimate account of the difficulties involved with interracial dating, both in public and in the family realm. The two sides of the album, one emphasizing rhythm and immaculate production, and the other lyricism and emotion, are found in these two songs. The punchy “Pressure In My Palms” (featuring slowthai and Vince Staples) and “Riri” round out the record’s light side. In “Limbo,” Amine finds the perfect balance.

Fleet Foxes, Shore

This album is a wave of calm. Robin Pecknold’s soothing voice is exactly what we needed more of this year. Pitchfork described his mission as “turning anxiety into euphoria,” and that is how this record feels. Each song is dynamic and filled with what makes Fleet Foxes so special. There is a choral quality to the vocals of “Shore,” as always, adding to the calm aura of the record. “A Long Way Past The Past” takes the listener on a what feels like a long walk filled with serious conversation. “Going-to-the-Sun Road,” a song that takes its name from the famous cliffside road through Glacier National Park, oozes sunshine in its Tame Impala-Bon Iver crossover sound. “Cradling Mother, Cradling Woman,” truly feels like being cradled in sound. Fleet Foxes has a knack for beginning songs by hitting the listener with a wall of sound, and that is so perfectly represented in this track. This is a seriously beautiful album.

Cam, The Otherside

Cam’s voice is irresistible. She showed her talent for sharing painful ballads in her breakthrough single “Burning House,” and in “The Otherside” she digs deeper. She writes this record in a period of change, and captures this change and dissonance in the nostalgia of “Redwood Tree.” She teamed up with Avicii for the title track before he passed away, and it shows. His signature building melodies and guitar breaks are clear, and they go perfectly with the range of Cam’s voice. She truly shows her range in this track and this record in general, from the highs in “The Otherside” and the lows of “Changes.” “Changes” is another standout of the album, co-written by Harry Styles. This record is a gorgeous account of outgrowing love and outgrowing people after the deep bliss that you felt with them in the past. “Till There’s Nothing Left” and “Classic” are the big love songs of the record, one that melts you and one that makes you want to dance in a field of flowers. The sisterly confessional “Diane” pulls Cam back to her country roots. She ends the record with what made her famous: a beautiful, sad ballad backed only by piano. Her unique vocals are on full display as the record concludes, and I couldn’t have asked for anything more.

Omar Apollo, Apolonio

Omar Apollo had his breakthrough in this record. His work spans languages and genres in a big way in “Apolonio.” “Kamikaze” and “Staybacik” stick to his typical R&B style, better produced than it ever has been. “Dos Uno Nueve (219)” goes a completely different direction, a Mexican corrido track featuring Yellow Room Music, honoring the Latinx musical styles that he expressed admiration for. Apollo also explores his sexuality in this album, fluidly discussing his bisexuality in “Kamikaze” and “I’m Amazing” in an exploratory manner. The whole album is generally quite exploratory, a quality that makes me even more excited for the work that is to come from Apollo.

Also worth mentioning:

Diplo, Diplo Presents Thomas Wesley: Snake Oil

Thundercat, It Is What It Is

Sylvan Esso, Free Love

Lauv, ~how i’m feeling~

Niall Horan, Heartbreak Weather

J Balvin, Colores

Kelsea Ballerini, kelsea

Dominic Fike, What Could Possibly Go Wrong

#music #2020

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newmusickarl · 3 years

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2021 has been relentless with great new music so far this year, with each Friday drop bringing with it at least two or three incredible new releases worth checking out. However, that still didn’t quite prepare me for this last week which has probably been the best New Music Friday of the year so far. An avalanche of new releases, including (at least as I haven’t got round to everything yet!) five incredible albums, each offering different sounds to fit different moods. Because of this and because I can’t choose a favourite from these records yet, there is no Album of the Week – instead here are the five albums and two tracks from the last seven days that you should make the time to listen to and discover:

Album & EP Recommendations

Carnage by Nick Cave & Warren Ellis

“This morning is amazing and so are you…” – Balcony Man

Surprise! Out of nowhere, the legendary Nick Cave and his partner in crime from the Bad Seeds Warren Ellis have today dropped their lockdown collaboration album - Carnage. And although I have only managed one listen through at the time of writing, just like his last two records, this one is really something special.

If there was any artist who you would pick to really capture the mood of lockdown and turn it into something magical, it would be Nick Cave. On his last record Ghosteen, one of my Albums of the Year for 2019, Cave & Ellis continued through their journey of despair which originally begun on 2016’s Skeleton Tree, ultimately finding a glimmer of hope at the end of it all. Carnage by comparison arrives almost as a halfway house thematically of these two previous efforts, carrying the hopelessness of Skeleton Tree rooted in real life events, along with the fantastical stories and tinge of optimism displayed on Ghosteen.

Because of this, Carnage is arguably more accessible than those two records, with Cave & Ellis seemingly dancing in the melancholy of the apocalypse across the album’s eight tracks. Sonically however it is vastly different, with the understated piano-driven melodies replaced with grand, operatic instrumentation built predominantly on strings, that move effortlessly from the menacing to the stirring at the drop of a hat.

Although I still need to stew on this record a bit more, the ominous prance of Old Time, the gorgeous guitar and choral chants of the title track and the beautifully restrained closer Balcony Man are standing out as the early highlights.

Cave himself summed up Carnage perfectly in his release statement, calling it “a brutal but very beautiful record nested in a communal catastrophe.” This is Cave and Ellis waltzing majestically in amongst the chaos, taking the listener into the eye of the storm and presenting them with something quite glorious at the centre of it all.

Terra Firma by Tash Sultana

Elsewhere, Australian multi-instrumentalist Tash Sultana released her much-anticipated sophomore album this week, Terra Firma. Contrary to Cave & Ellis’ record, Sultana delivers a peaceful escape from the global situation, delivering a record that is very personal and reflective.

Soulful and richly textured, there are plenty of career-best moments here including the acoustic-driven cooing of Crop Circles, the gorgeous Josh Cashman collaboration Dream My Life Away and the record’s transcendent finale, I Am Free. However, it is the album’s centrepiece Coma that delivers arguably Sultana’s best song to date, a beautifully constructed track about letting go, that culminates in a wonderfully bluesy guitar solo.

At 60 minutes long, Terra Firma feels like a meditative experience – an album to sit and bask in to get some much needed relaxation and introspection away from the lockdown grind. This is another special album, one I’ve returned to numerous times this week and can see me continuing to do so over the course of the year too.

As Love Continues by Mogwai

At this point, ten albums and 26 years into their career, people just about know what to expect from Scottish post-rockers Mogwai, and that is soaring, grandiose instrumentals. However somehow with each new release, the band still manage to amaze, taking their instrumentals into unchartered territory and leaving listeners in wonder with their colourful, breath-taking soundscapes.

For me, As Love Continues is one of their best releases for years (with some of their best song names too). From cathartic opener To the Bin My Friend, Tonight We Vacate The Earth, the acid-drenched industrial sounds of Here We, Here We, Here We Go Forever, and the dreamy, looping guitar riff and euphoric crescendo of Pat Stains, Mogwai’s touch for forging fascinating sonic textures hasn’t missed a beat. That said, it is the one track that contains clean vocals that stands out amongst the pack, and that is the emotional gut punch of Ritchie Sacramento which sees frontman Stuart Braithwaite paying a beautiful tribute to all his musician friends that have passed over the years.

This is definitely one of my favourite recent Mogwai records, and one of my favourite releases by anybody this year so far – an essential listen.

Trauma Factory by nothing,nowhere

When you’re ready for a change of pace after indulging in the albums above, then the fantastic fourth record from American prodigy Joe Mulherin under his nothing,nowhere guise is the place to go. Mulherin has always been known for his edgy blend of hip-hop, R&B, pop punk and emo, with this crossover of genres helping him to forge a sound that feels very much his own, with many trying to replicate since and ultimately failing.

Now on Trauma Factory, Mulherin sets himself for world domination with arguably his most commercial collection of tracks to date, certainly from a melody standpoint at least if not lyrically. From ambient groove lights (4444), the laidback, slackerpop of upside down, the anthemic chorus of pretend, the infectiously catchy KennyHoopla collaboration blood, and the straight-up pop punk of nightmare, Trauma Factory feels stadium-ready, almost playing out like a nothing,nowhere greatest hits collection.

However as big and chart friendly as this one feels at times, there are still plenty of riskier moments too, such as the bold, heavy riffs and aggressive vocals of death, a track which is nicely contrasted by the vulnerability of one like real, an album highlight which sees Joe confess his own pressures and anxieties in a haunting spoken word number.

All in all, this a wonderfully eclectic album that perfectly showcases Mulherin’s growing confidence as a songwriter and artist. This was by far my most highly anticipated album heading into this week, and although I am yet to decide if this is overall Mulherin’s finest release to date, there is no doubt that this a highly enjoyable 40 minute listen, packed in with plenty of career best tracks.

Non-Fiction by Spector

And finally this week on the album front, legendary indie rockers Spector have released a new 13 track collection called Non-Fiction, a culmination of all their independent EPs and singles released since their last full length album Moth Boys in 2015 (their last to be released on Fiction records, hence the title of this one, aha!). That album was actually my Album of the Year in 2015 and, despite not being an official studio album, Non-Fiction resonates with me the same way that album did six years ago.

One of the great differentiators Spector have always had over other British guitar bands for me is enigmatic frontman Fred Macpherson, with his witty humour and razor-sharp songwriting completely unmatched by any of his peers. On Non-Fiction, his unique brand of lyricism is out in full force with this collection featuring some of the very best songs Spector have ever written. From the brilliant “We broke down on the M1, they said to call the AA but I didn’t know which one” line in opener Untitled in D, through to the “More M&S than S&M, two can dine for news at ten, voucher for my requiem, now I’m one of them” verse in album highlight When Did We Get So Normal?, Macpherson doesn’t waste a single word.

Steered by Macpherson’s astute, observational lyricism, Spector serve up huge singalong indie anthems that have no reason to be this poetic and wonderfully crafted. Again, an album that features plenty of career highs including Fine Not Fine, Wild Guess, Tenner and Half Life to name but a few, Non-Fiction, despite being independently made, feels every bit as special as its predecessor Moth Boys did. Ultimately if you’re after rousing indie anthems this week, you’ll struggle to find anything better.

Tracks of the Week

The Last Man On Earth by Wolf Alice

Onto tracks then and Wolf Alice made their triumphant return this week, debuting the first taste of their forthcoming album Blue Weekend. An unexpected first single choice, The Last Man On Earth is a haunting piano ballad built around Ellie Rowsell’s powerfully haunting vocals, which eventually erupts into a glorious haze of soaring guitars. Welcome back!

Paranoid by Keir

And my final recommendation this week is the anthemic new single from singer-songwriter Keir. Ever since the release of his song Squeeze Me years ago, Keir has been an artist I always thought should be dominating radio stations across the country. Although he’s not achieved that feat just yet, Paranoid may be the track to change all that with its instantly catchy chorus, glorious choral backing and masterful production. One of the best pop songs of the year so far.

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britishchick09 · 3 years

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danger force return of the kid livewatch

HENRY IS BACK AND IT’S TIME FOR ME TO FINALLY GET AROUND TO WATCHING IT! :D

the version i’m watching on dailymotion is slightly chipmunked and it’s adorable ^_^

awww sweetest hug ever! ♥

chapa: “don’t make me get the crowbar!” omg :o

miles: “you hate to see it” and you love to see the meme ;)

henry’s dad is graduating from an online school how 2020

CAPTAIN MAN LOVES THE HUGS!!! :D

mika: “we once caught a guy that was stealing books... FROM THE LIBRARY!” omg shocking! :o

henry just said ‘noice’ wtf mr. hart

henry spent ‘his whole childhood’ defeating people but wasn’t he like a tween when he became kid danger?

ray: “henry’s MINE now” awww :)

idk if henry can still become kid danger (i haven’t seen the henry danger finale) but i really hope he does

henry: “everyone thinks kid danger is-“ chapa: “hot?” miles: “dead?” lol

ray wants henry to pick his nail color awww :)

henry wants them to ‘handle it themselves’ does that mean he can’t transform? :o

henry just deleted ‘where are you?’ messages from charlotte HENRY DID YOU SERIOUSLY ABANDON YOUR FRIENDS FOR RAY YOU’RE NOT JOHN WITH YOKO

the audience just gave a quiet ‘aww’ when henry deleted the messages same :/

ray: “you wanna see my axe storing room?” your WHAT room

henry: “do i even have to axe?” eyyyyyyy ;)

ray and henry are the best of friends! :D

they’re playing a just dance ripoff how sweet :)

henry: “this has been so much fun!” ray: “I LOVE YOU TOO!” henry: “what?” ray: “I SAID GET READY FOR ROUND TWO!”

the game is calling for a tango STOP THE SHIPPING

and the game is called PRANCE PRANCE REVOLUTION lol :D

ray wants the kids to leave to spend more time with henry ♥

DAAAANG HENRY JUST LIFTED RAY YOOO!!!!!

ray: “quit your bellyaching!” henry: “yeah, this is what you get paid for!” the kids: “YOU GOT PAID???” lol :D

ray wants to stay up there ‘as long as he can’ wowza what a shippy shippy

the intro pops up nearly 6 minutes into the ep what a long and exciting cold open! :D

chapa to mika: “we got your heart to start beating again...” wtf happened :o

bose’s mouth was full did he have a towel in his mouth lol

mikes screaming “I HATE YOU!!” is better than anakin lol

CHAPA WANTS TO DESTROY HENRY WTF

mika isn’t up for this bs YOU GO MIKA!!!!!

mika: “AND CHAPA SHOULD BE THE ONE THAT KILLS HIM!!” FRICK YEAH!!!

...but also FRICK NO DON’T KILL CAPTAIN MAN PLZ

omg henry and ray started a totally sick rock band yo!

SCHWOZ BE LIKE ‘AWWW YEAHHHH!!!!” :D

henry: “don’t need to practice when you’re already perfect, dude!” hannah montana wants to know your location

why is ray obsessed with henry’s mom creepy

henry: “gotta save my messages to the cloud!” F U T U R E!!!!”

char’s messages are like ‘you can’t run from this’ HENRY WHAT’S GOIN’ ON HMMMM?????

ray: “...that didn’t sound like your mom.”

henry asked if he was ‘totally untrackable in the man’s nest’ WHAT DID YOU DO HENRY

ray: “finding you in here would be like trying to find a gray hair on my head!” henry: “there’s one right there.” ray: “whaaat?”

MIKA BE P-I-DOUBLE S-ED YO

henry’s been there for 3-4 days HENRYYYY!!!!

chapa: “we also think we should be able to vaporize someone FOR NO REASON AT ALL!!!!” daang chapa p-i-double wuble s-ed too!

ray: “time is a tall glass of water” henry: “please don’t punch my glass-” ray: *PUNCHES GLASS LIKE A BOSS*

ray: “next crime that calls is goin’ home in a body bag” sweet serenity celestia captain man calm down

henry: “who knows when the next call will come in?” call: *comes in* lol

OMG DID THE KIDS SET UP THE EMERGENCY CALL???? :o

HENRY TRANSFORMED YAAAS!!! and i guess the dark outfit he wore in the insta teaser pic is his new hero form?? :o

henry: “up the tube!” captain man: “...we go down the tube.” lol :D

and awayyyyy they go!

robber: “part of the reason i rob people is for the connection i feel and i feel like you’re (the cashier) not here with me right now!” awww ♥

the cashier walked past captain man’s book first of all awesome call back and secondly why is a book being sold at a convenience store

captain man: “let’s slow fight this crime”

robber: “is this your sidekick?” ray: “naw, we’re just vibing!” henry: “you don’t even know what that means” ray: “it’s means, like, we’re together but not really” johnlock wants to know your location

henry really wants to get back to the man’s nest what’s goin’ on here????

a drone just said ‘henry hart located sending bounty hunter’ first of all wtf and secondly BOBA FETT CROSSOVER WHAT

even captain man’s like ‘wtf dude?’

mika: “i finally got mom and dad to fall asleep! you know what that means...” others: “SCREEN TIME!!! :D” kids these days...

chapa; “i wish i had a phone!” the way she said it is a total ‘god i wish that were me’ meme

the ad on is for ‘imdb tv’ THEY HAVE A STREAMING SERVICE??????

mika has a big phone or a tiny tablet

mika to a caller: “WHAT DO YOU WANT????” miles: “YOU’RE INTERRUPTIN’ SCREEN TIME!!!” sweet serenity you two CALM THE FRICK DOWN

captain man: “the kid and i are in a bit of a jimmy jam...” jimmy john’s wants your location

henry: “you want to fly the mancopter? get a bunch of puppies?” you’d think the kids would want to fly the flipping mancopter but they want puppies instead. kids these days! :D

captain man: “what’s gotten your brisket in a basket?” lol

henry: “dystopia’s really scary-“ well duh you live in a town called DYSTOPIA what did you expect

henry messed with a guy WHO EATS PEOPLE’S SOULS WTF

captain man reaction: “...so you didn’t come to swellview to see me?” i think you should be focused on the, i don’t know... EATING PEOPLE’S SOULS PART RAY

the lights just went out OH MAN

OH CRAP THE BLACKOUT IS HERE WITH A GUN

henry: “we’re gonna die, dude!” captain man: “hold on gotta try and think of an opening quip-“ this is like yakko saying ‘we need a perfect opening’ line in the animaniacs reboot lol :D

also THIS DUDE IS LITERALLY GONNA KILL YOU RAY YOU SHOULD BE SCARED FOR YOUR LIFE

captain man: “knock knock-“ the blackout guy: *shoots captain man into a wall* captain man: “typically you’d say ‘who’s there?’“ lol

YO THE GUY JUST GOT TRAPPED IN A SPIDER WEB

shoutout: “how did you miss the floor awol?” awol: “at least we’re here! we could’ve been in another country!” oh miles! :D

chapa: “why are the lights out?” henry: “it’s blackout! he’s a bounty hunter from dystopia-“ chapa: “aaalllllready stopped listening.” why does nobody care about a soul-sucking bounty hunter tho??

captain man has a wall on his back like peter being stuck to the couch in that one family guy ep lol

the lights go on and everyone cheers! :D

captain man: “i said i wasn’t done with my quip! knock knock-“ *gets thrown to the ground* he’s never gonna get to that quip huh

henry: “looks like captain man is taking care of him.” no i think HE’S BEING ATTACKED HENRY

henry: “tell schwoz he can keep my dirty laundry-” why didn’t he pick it up before he moved tho

awol: “captain man says you’re the best superhero he’s ever seen!” henry: “that doesn’t sound like him.” brainstorm: “he also says you have a surprisingly good singing voice.” henry: “i guess i’m alriiight...;)” lol

volt: “captain man says that we’re garbage and we’ll never measure up to you” geez ray be a bit nicer to them (especially chapa) not everyone’s your bf henry

awol: “let’s take this guy down together! ... that sounded really cheesy” lol i love how they all agree except for shoutout :D

the blackout guy wants to know why captain man’s not dying DOES RAY NOT HAVE A SOUL????

YO VOLT JUST HIT BLACKOUT’S FACE WITH LIGHTNING that’s gotta hurt!

blackout falling down because of a scream is the best :D

yay they did it!!! :D

AND BRAINSTORM HIGH-FIVED HENRY YAS! :D

captain man: “what do you get when you cross a duck with a shutzu?” nice dodging the nickelodeon censors ray ;)

barrow raffle ad: “you could win a million dollars! if you ask us, that’s a win-win” a win-win is letting me finish this ep

captain man kicked blackout and he didn’t respond IS HE DEAD??? :o

schwoz left an alive present in henry’s jeans WTF SCHWOZ

henry: “tough group of kids you got there.” ray: “yep, it always surprises me how much grit and determination each one of them has- oh my god, they’re baby-talking the puppies” lol what a perfectly delivered line :D

henry: “buh-bye dangers!” awww dangers!!! :’)

the higher-pitch of the vid makes mika’s puppy voice SO ADORBS! ♥

♥♥♥♥♥♥

*phone alarm* henry: “that’s my guber!” i know it’s an uber pun but henry’s getting a goofy goober ride awwww yeah! B)

ray doesn’t want to let go awww :)

yo schwoz put a turtle in henry’s pocket lol :D

ooh there’s a post credit scene! :D

and it’s bloopers how sweet :)

that was a great ep as always (probably my fave ep along with the quarantine special)! him and captain man have awesome chemistry and henry with the kids is great too ♥ see ya soon henry! (and danger force)

#livewatch #it's nice to return to this show #and see henry's return of course ;)

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amphtaminedreams · 4 years

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The Eras of Lana Del Rey: Lookbook no.9

Hi to anyone reading,

Hope you’re okay! AND that you didn’t end up here because you searched the Lana Del Rey tag so you could see people ranting about her-you’re about to be very disappointed. Sorry. This is not about to be some Question for the Culture discourse because the world is bleak enough right now and the last thing we all need is to be reminded of that saga.

Being a Lana Del Rey fan is easy, they said. She’s not a controversial artist, they said. And yet 2020 had to do what it does best and fuck everything up.

Whether people like her or not, it’s made me so angry reading all the abuse she’s been getting about her appearance for the last couple of weeks, because I really thought that if we could agree on anything it was that attacking individuals for the way they look because you dislike something they’ve done (with the exception of shit like racist tattoos and blackfishing) is, you know, awful and judgemental as fuck? Like you do realise when you treat the word fat as a pejorative that the fat people you don’t have a problem with understood that you meant it as an insult too? I think what all those people tweeting about Lana’s weight, and that includes some of her fans, are forgetting is that she was in her early 20s when she was thrust into the limelight. As much as there’s this conspiracy that her dad bought her a career in the music industry, she’d made the decision to go it alone and had lived in a trailer park as a struggling musician for years. On top of that, we have the unreleased tracks with lyrics seemingly referencing an eating disorder in her younger years. OF COURSE her body is going to look different. Why is it that we treat weight gain as an inherently bad thing without any insight into the other factors that constitute a person’s “health”? It’s fucking insane that so many feel they have the right to comment on other’s bodies in the first place and it breaks my heart that she might be reading these comments. This wasn’t intended to necessarily be a rant about how much I love this woman but all the shit I’ve read about her on the internet these past few months have pushed me to it. You'll respect your queen of alternative music or I shall stan twice as hard on your behalf. You can thank me later when you come to your senses xoxo

I’d love to say it was intentional that I finally finished this post the week Violet Bent Backwards Over the Grass was released but that would imply I have my shit way more together than I actually do. If I’m being completely honest, I’ve only heard L.A Who am I to Love You so far 1). because I want to wait for the hard copy for the rest and that doesn’t turn up til September and 2). because I do not have my shit together, lol. That being said, there is no doubt in my mind that I am going to love it-one thing I have always loved about Lana’s lyrics is how well they paint a picture and this is something that poetry only more freely allows for the exploration of. That ability to create such a strong narrative voice and atmosphere is a talent that extends to her visuals and the production of her records too, and is something I really missed when it comes to the Norman Fucking Rockwell era. I’m just going to say it: a strong aesthetic is to NFR as memorable songs are to Lust for Life. Lacking. Am I allowed to say that as a fan? The collaborations don’t do it for me, okay, and as as NFR is concerned, aside from The Greatest/Fuck It I Love You video which went down the whole neon surfer girl route, it’s hard to identify a cohesive theme. It’s understandable that at this point, she would want to just focus purely on the music, and it goes without saying that NFR will stand the test of time in that regard but I don’t think we can deny that when people think of Lana in the future, it’s not gonna be a green windbreaker that comes into their heads.

^Illustration credit to Filip Kozak (https://filipkozaksart.tumblr.com/?fbclid=IwAR3vwLX2pNxoFNhTPD1ky14LllPqlLtL1GxGlD79xuHxdtzcHLw-6aNBZWo)

And here’s where this Filip Kozak illustration comes into it; after years of it sitting in my camera roll for years, it finally has a use. There’s really nothing better to illustrate how mundane life has become this year than the disproportionate level of excitement my photo-hoarding-self experienced realising it would fit perfectly into this post and is thus eligible for deletion. Up there with being able to fit a whole box of biscuits onto the shelf at work rather than having to individually take out as many as I can and then shove them on top of the existing box of biscuits one by one. Truly riveting content on this Tumblr page. Back to the point-by using this as my stimulus for the post rather than the Lana Del Rey albums as outfits tag that went round on Twitter, I can conveniently exclude NFR as an outfit inspiration category, and that saves me from having to buy a charity shop windbreaker with its price bumped up 150% by some upper middle class Depop e-girl or boy who uses the word peng as a descriptor like it’s a nervous tic. To make up for leaving out NFR, I’ve tried to branch out a bit and do the outfits not just based on the music videos or album covers but also from street style and stage looks and photoshoots from around the same period too. It was hard not to be influenced by the general “vibe” and sound of the albums either when I was planning outfits, whether it’s the grand, orchestral instrumentals of Born to Die or the 70s psychedelic rock inspired riffs of Ultraviolence and hopefully that’ll show as well! Enjoy:D

Born to Die (Release Date: 27th January 2012)

It’s been 8 years, and when you ask most people what they think of when they hear the name Lana Del Rey, they’ll probably dismiss her as the one who sings about being sad and doing coke and sleeping with older men. That’s the Born to Die impact. Say what you want but it’s one of only a handful of albums released by a female artist to have spent more than 300 weeks on the Billboard 200 chart and it really established the mythos of “Lana Del Rey” because before all this, before all the think pieces from other women claiming she’d set feminism back hundreds of years with her music, before she ousted grayscale Effy Stonem as the queen of angsty teen Tumblr (which as you can probably guess was a subsection of the internet I was very much engulfed by, lmao), she was just Lizzie Grant, a relatively normal aspiring singer songwriter in her early twenties. But as Lana Del Rey, she was someone else-some beautiful, mystical being that personified the sentiment of being born in the wrong era. Whilst every other singer’s record labels seemed to be trying desperately to thrust them into the future and keep them on top of all the musical and stylistic trends, it was refreshing to hear someone whose music and visuals captured all the most glamorous elements of the past. Part Priscilla Presley/Jackie O reincarnation (the National Anthem video really illustrated how Lana is just as much a storyteller as she is a musician), part high level mobster’s wayward wife à la Michelle Pfeiffer in Scarface, she was the good girl by day and the bad girl by night, and I think that’s a duality we can all relate to or would like to think we’re interesting enough to relate to deep down.

Her style from around this period was EVERYTHING. She had those grungy Tumblr girl elements, the camo jacket and the oversized pieces and the leather jackets, but she also heavily drew on the styles and silhouettes of the 50s and 60s with the beehives and the new look Dior inspired cinched waist dresses. Even now in 2020, I think this period is what most people would think if they were asked to describe Lana’s style. I made sure I got the grungy pieces in there with the chunky boots and the vinyl and the oversized leather but the foundation of her looks back then were usually these daintier throwback pieces like the white silk dress and the corset and the mint fur trimmed coat (House of Sunny’s Penny Pistachio coat).

Favourite lyrics from the album? “Now my life is sweet like cinnamon, like a fucking dream I'm living in” from Radio. Nobody asked but I’m gonna give it to you anyway.

Born to Die: The Paradise Edition (Release Date: 9th November 2012)

Lana’s Paradise EP contains probably my absolute favourite song of her’s, Ride, and with that, the beautiful opening monologue that will stay in my mind forever. This era was of course ushered in by Tropico, the short film that included the premiere of the songs Bel Air, Body Electric and Gods and Monsters, which established the ethereal tone of this period-it’s in the name, after all. Both the album and the videos were other-worldly and leaned heavily on religious symbolism which I’m sure pissed off many a middle-aged bible basher at the time. Most prominent in her lyrics were reflections on the freedom of the open road which corresponded with visuals of biker gangs and desert dwellers and modern interpretations of the Wild West, as was an attempt to capture the nature of the so-called “American spirit” which as Lana portrayed it shared more qualities with a kind of celestial, transient being than any kind of solid concept or identity. She played an emotionally detached stripper and a haunted saloon-style-bar singer (almost looking like a runaway bride) and Eve the “first woman” all in the same album and honestly, if that’s not iconic, I don’t know what is. We saw SO many incredible red carpet looks in this period too which built upon this idea of her as the fallen angel tempted by original sin that Tropico established; I feel like this era was all about laying bare the soul of the character she played, this broken, delicate but ultimately liberated being that was so dangerous to the idea of the strong, stable modern feminist ideal. She went about it in COMPLETELY the wrong way in a post that betrayed the ignorance of the privilege she has as a white female performer, but I think this is what she was getting at in it and Ultraviolence only went on to bolster her critics.

In response to the criticism she still receives about the choice to wear a Native American war bonnet in her Ride music video, I’d like to say that it really seems like she’s learnt from that-actions speak louder than words and so though it’s not my place to say whether this makes up for that error, the work she’s done with Native American reparations-focussed foundations since and the money she’s donated to the cause says a lot about her intentions. Again, I want to stress that it’s not my place to say! But it’s a detail that is often overlooked so I thought I’d mention it here.

“I was a singer, not a very popular one. I once had dreams of becoming a beautiful poet. But upon an unfortunate series of events saw those dreams dashed and divided like a million stars in the night sky, that I wished on over and over again, sparkling and broken. But I didn’t really mind because I knew that it takes getting everything you ever wanted and then losing it to know what true freedom is.”

Ultraviolence (Release Date: 13th June 2014)

AH, Ultraviolence. My favourite of Lana’s albums and imo, a masterpiece. ONE skip. ONE. Sorry Guns and Roses. I got stoned in my back garden and listened to this (for research purposes ofc, heh) and ended up deciding that this is what I want to listen to when I die (also whilst stoned). It sounds dramatic but listening to this album in that state of mind is such a heavenly experience that I’d be too zen to notice myself slipping away into nothingness on the basis that if I didn’t as long as I could stay in that bubble of awe, nothingness forever wouldn’t be so scary after all. I know, I know, that sentence has big Jaden Smith’s old tweets energy. But if an album is what helps me get over an existential crisis, I beg you allow me the nonsensical ramblings about how I felt like I was ascending into the stars.

Though in terms of the lyrical content the public perception is probably correct, I think the reputation Ultraviolence has as Lana’s darkest, most gothic album (which is something I’ve in incorporated into the outfits I put together) is mistaken; instrumentally and visually it drew more on 70s psychedelic rock and the bohemian counter culture of the period than anything, and her stage looks are a clear reflection of that, and also the outfits I was most excited to channel. It seems counter-intuitive to the moody atmosphere I associate the tracklist with but it’s my go-to summer album; it’s raw (probably her most stripped back work along with NFR, lots of the songs are barely edited) and it’s gloomy but let’s be real, hot as fuck-don’t bother making a sex playlist, just put Ultraviolence on shuffle, and you’re good to go. This was the album where Lana debuted some of her most criticised lyrics and where the notion that she glamourises abuse comes from, one of the points she also seemed to be getting at in the Instagram post, but imo it’s fair to say that she sang truthfully about the initial allure of a dangerous relationship and the nature of the mindset that facilitates staying with somebody poisonous where you do feel like you’re nothing without them. Turning horrific experiences into romantic tragedies is how Lana has always made her music and yeah, out of context there are some fucked up lyrics on the album, but policing how a woman expresses her trauma and complaining that she glorifies weakness because she wrote honestly about the reality of a complicated partnership is hardly any more “feminist” than the lyrics themselves. I can only guess that the reason Lana felt the need to bring up this criticism in 2020 is because these darker themes are going to be revisited in her upcoming album and that in spite of the issues with the way she expressed herself, this time critics will be more accepting of how she chooses to address these themes.

On a lighter note “yeah my boyfriend's pretty cool, but he's not as cool as me” will always be a great line. Simple but effective. If my boyfriend ever is cooler than me it’ll be doing Lana a disservice.

Honeymoon (Release Date: 18th September 2015)

Considering that a lot of other Lana fans are of the opinion that this is her best album, I find it weird that I really don’t remember all that much about this period, other than High by the Beach being released and then hearing Salvatore and Freak for the first time. I guess because she didn’t do a Honeymoon specific tour and didn’t make that many public appearances in this period? It was definitely harder for me to find visual reference points beyond the HbtB music video and the cover art, so I mostly drew on the general vibe of the album, a cinematic accompaniment to a summer in Italy or the South of France, filled with exotic instrumentals and the sense of impending romantic doom that Lana does so well. I suppose if I associate the visuals of this era with anything it’s idyllic florals and warm tones, bygone country club pool days, a rich American’s vacation in Southern Europe, long walks on the beach (and as our Lord and Saviour Jujubee once said, big dicks and fried chicken). Apparently inspired by Lana’s relationship with Francesco Carrozini, it’s a hazy story of some ultra-feminine, submissive archetype becoming unhealthily enchanted by a mysterious “foreign man” who’s ultimately not all that good for her, which as the story goes turned out to be quite prophetic. Going against the grain, it’s my least favourite of her albums after Lust for Life, but in spite of that, I will always remember how obsessed I was with the sax riffs (I think? I don’t know my instruments all that well so forgive me, lol) on Freak and I definitely understand why it’s a firm favourite for so many.

“You could be a bad motherfucker, but that don’t make you a man.” was truly a cultural reset of a line.

-on an unrelated note, OMG, I never realised how I have my mouth open in literally every fucking photo I take, somebody tell me how to pose, please and thank you-

Lust for Life (Release Date: 21 July 2017)

Lust for Life is a controversial one. On the one hand, I appreciate that this album was the victory cry of a happier, more independent, politically-aware Lana in spite of it apparently being a far more optimistic sounding album than the one she wanted to release, but on the other there were way too many collaborations for me and this meant that the album lacked a sense of cohesion and the characteristic narrative thread that usually runs throughout her tracklist. Aside from Love, Cherry, Get Free and Tomorrow Never Came, most of the songs on the album aren’t hugely memorable and it’s a crying shame that a collaboration with STEVIE FUCKING NICKS of all people left so much to be desired. Coming from two witchy icons, I expected something absolutely magical so maybe I was setting myself up for failure, but come on. We could’ve had a real anthem there.

Aesthetically speaking however, this is one of my favourite eras for Lana, which is unsurprising when you consider the tracklist contains references to both Woodstock and Coachella. I’m not gonna lie, I think seeing Coachella fashion in my early teens was my style awakening-I remember seeing Vanessa Hudgens’ outfits and being like, wow, I want to be her (oh, what a fall from grace)-so the late 60s/early 70s flower power groupie style Lana adopted in this period really spoke to me. It was all long hair and dreamy pastels, and this era included some of the most head-to-toe coordinated looks we’ve ever seen from her. Of course I couldn’t completely abandon the grungy touches that I love, that I tend to associate with the early Lana street style days and the Paradise and Ultraviolence music videos rather than with this album, but I’m never gonna pass up an opportunity to whack out a good floral two piece and putting together Lust for Life inspired looks is the perfect excuse to do that.

So, that marks the end of this post! If you made it to the end, thank you so much for reading! I have a Yesstyle lookbook and review to edit but now that I’ve finished that, I’m trying to go down more of a style inspiration focussed route with my lookbooks rather than just putting together outfits from clothes I’ve just bought (though I might still do one every so often to bring in a new season-let’s just ignore the fact that they’re all blending into one bc climate change for now, one catastrophe at a time please universe). I find that if you have a specific idea in mind of what you want, it’s super easy to find something similar on Depop and Ebay and that way you avoid buying new things and also take old things off a person’s hands that might otherwise end up being thrown out by a charity shop and then dumped into a landfill from there. Something I’d LOVE to do before this year is out is put together a lookbook based on the most stylish TV shows of the last decade, but that probably won’t be for a while-even so, if you have any recommendations of series to watch which could fit into this category, let me know!

To finish, I need to go a little bit off-topic so forgive me, but I truly don’t know why this even needs to be said: WEAR A FUCKING MASK. IT IS NOT A POLITICAL ISSUE. IT IS A BASIC HYGIENIC PRACTICE THAT HELPS SPREAD THE STOP OF A HIGHLY CONTAGIOUS DISEASE! RUDIMENTAL SCIENCE! NOT A CHANCE TO PROVE HOW “EDGY” YOU ARE! SERIOUSLY, STOP MAKING A FUCKING PANDEMIC ABOUT YOURSELF! NOBODY ENJOYS WEARING THEM BUT THEY HELP PROTECT OTHERS! SO UNLESS YOU HAVE A VALID MEDICAL REASON NOT TO BE WEARING ONE, DON’T BE A SELFISH PRICK!

Sorry to sign off on a rant-y note with something that has nothing to do with Lana, lol, but all the stupidity has been grinding me gears lately and I had to let it out on behalf of all retail workers: if we can wear a mask for 9 hours at a time, YOU can tolerate the mild discomfort of wearing one for 10 minutes. I know this doesn’t apply to the majority of people but there’s always a couple of arseholes, isn’t there!?

Stay safe,

Lauren x

#ldr #lana #lana del rey #fashion #fashion blogger #style blogger #outfit inspo

19 notes · View notes

damienthepious · 4 years

Text

[spoilers re: the new ep redacted]

Scattered On My Shore (Chapter 11)

[Ch 1] [Ch 2] [Ch 3] [Ch 4] [Ch 5] [Ch 6] [Ch 7] [Ch 8] [Ch 9] [Ch 10] [ao3] [Ch 12] [Ch 13] [Ch 14] [Ch 15] [Ch 16] [Ch 17] [Ch 18] [Ch 19]

Fandom: The Penumbra Podcast

Relationship: Lord Arum/Sir Damien/Rilla, Sir Damien/Rilla

Characters: Rilla, Lord Arum, Sir Damien

Additional Tags: Second Citadel, Lizard Kissin’ Tuesday, Pre-Relationship, (for the three of them. it’s established r/d), Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Injury, Injury Recovery, Hurt/Comfort, Slow Burn, (this will also be), Enemies to Lovers, (for damien and arum eventually lol)

Fic Summary: Strange things wash up out of the lake near Rilla’s hut, on occasion. But this monster… this monster is certainly the strangest.

Chapter Summary: It is just the three of them, for a while. Until that begins to feel almost normal.

Chapter Notes: Psst. Happy Lizard Kissin' Tuesday! I am tired and have ceased to be creative. Chapter specific warnings for... hm. Some fraught arguments, I'll say. Not much more than that, this time.

Damien prefers to stay in the room, if Rilla and Arum are sharing space. Paranoid, Rilla thinks, but she can usually keep the frustration of it from biting at her. He's mostly harmless, anyway, and if she can get him talking enough to where he seems to forget Arum is there, it's almost pleasant. Arum pretends not to care one way or the other, but Rilla knows his body language well enough to tell when he's either nervous about Damien's scrutiny, or alternatively when he's just as drawn in to Damien's stories as she is.

"Amaryllis… explain the muttering to me," he asks, some afternoon when Damien has left to report back to the Citadel.

"The muttering?"

"Incessantly," Arum growls. "The muttering of your little knight. He is a poet, that much I understand, and the constant spinning of tales is not entirely disagreeable, but even leaving that aside, must he be always chanting to himself?"

"Yeah," Rilla says. "He actually does kind of must."

Arum frowns. "What do you mean?"

"It's important to him. Praying to Saint Damien."

"Saint," Arum hisses darkly, rolling his eyes.

"It helps him think, helps him keep himself calm."

"Tranquility," Arum mutters, his frown deepening. "Hm. That does not bother you, then? His chattering?"

"It's important to him," Rilla repeats. "Saints know I have my own irritating habits, anyway." She pauses as Arum scoffs, and then she shrugs. "I mean, I'd be lying if I said I never got annoyed with him, but I love him. Talking to himself- talking to his Saint doesn't hurt anything. If it makes him happy, I wanna do my best to support that."

"How magnanimous of you," Arum drawls, his teeth bared in a vaguely malicious smirk.

Rilla frowns. "Don't."

He blinks. "Don't- what?"

"I know that look," she says. "I know you like pushing his buttons, and I know he's cute when he's flustered, but this- it wouldn't be the same, Arum."

"I- cute? I don't have the first idea what you are talking about, takatakataka."

"It's fine if you tease him," Rilla continues, "but I'd really appreciate it if you made an effort not to make fun of him for that."

Arum opens his mouth, then snaps it shut, and then he flinches and looks away from her for a long rattling moment. "I… I do not intend to do the knight any favors, Amaryllis, but I am perfectly capable of verbal sparring without taking a cheap shot," he mutters, and she buries a smile because of course he wouldn't agree because she asked, but if it's about his own pride-

"Thank you," she says anyway, and then she changes the subject before his growling gets too out of hand.

Rilla leans in the doorway of her hut in the morning, coffee steaming in her hand, slowly rounding out to awake as she watches Damien go through his routine with a lazy sort of hunger curling in her stomach.

She hears Arum behind her, limping slowly from his room on the crutch, and she tries not to feel irritated that he's pushing himself instead of asking for help. He is getting stronger, she reminds herself, and she buries the little flash of nerves that comes with the thought.

"Morning, Arum," she murmurs over her shoulder, and instead of going towards the table she hears him pause, and then approach, the crutch thumping rhythmically against the wood of her floor.

"What are you doing, little doctor? Why have a door at all if you intend to leave it hanging in the… wind…"

She doesn't turn towards him, tilting her head to better watch the way Damien is stretching instead. "Morning routine," she mumbles, her voice catching on a yawn at the end. "His, and mine too."

"A-ah," Arum says, and she hears him whir out a strange sort of exhale. "Routine?" he echoes. "He does this… regularly, then?"

"Almost every morning." She takes a slow sip of coffee, and then tilts her head the other way, watching the light gleam off of Damien's skin as he rolls his shoulders before he moves into his next set of forms. "Mm."

"And the- his- clothing-"

Rilla hums again, sighing a light laugh. "No point in getting his shirt all sweaty if he can avoid it," she says, making no effort to disguise the pleasure in her voice. "You won't hear any complaints from me," she murmurs, and then she takes another sip. "Anyway. You sleep alright, Arum?"

He doesn't answer for a moment, and Rilla glances over her shoulder. Arum's head is tilted as hers had been, his lips just barely parted, his tongue is flicking lightly, and his eyes are very obviously fixed on Damien.

Huh.

"Enjoying the view?"

"Hmm…" Arum trails off, then he blinks quickly as he seems to realize what she actually said. He flinches, the crutch skidding a step against the wood, and Rilla reaches automatically to stabilize him as he hisses in alarm. "Ah-"

"Whoa, easy- I've got you-"

He shakes his head, readjusting and then taking a large and decisive step back from her, back from the door.

"I-" his frill flutters, but he clenches his teeth and it settles before it can flare entirely. "Certainly you will forgive me for being distracted by the sight of the outdoors, Amaryllis. I have been cooped up in this hut for- for entirely too long. I am unused to prolonged captivity, I am sure you understand," he hisses, looking very deliberately away from both herself and the door, and then he hobbles over to sit at the table, growling low as he goes.

Rilla watches him go, too stunned to really respond to that. After a moment, the monster still refusing to look her way, she bites her tongue, and then she closes the door.

When Rilla comes into his room Arum is sitting on the edge of his cot, shoulders stiff, and he has her recorder in his claws. He stares up at her, eyes narrowed to vivid violet slits, hard and flat and angry, and Rilla feels a little pang of confused dread drop through her.

“Arum?” she says, and the monster’s lip curls into a sneer as he presses the button down on the device.

“Subject is severely injured,” says Rilla-in-the-past, her voice crackling through the recording and noticeably detached. “Wounds consistent with… attack by another monster. Likely, multiple.” The version of herself on the recording sighs. “Injuries will likely prove fatal. I’ve done what I can to stabilize the subject, but it hasn't regained consciousness, and it's unlikely that it will. Honestly, I would be surprised if it survives the night. Which is unfortunate, since this seems like it might actually be some sort of new and undocumented ashdragon variant, or possibly something even less documented than that, which would make it utterly unique. I guess I’ll see if it regenerates when this particular body dies, and then I’ll have that answer, at least.” Another sigh, some shifting noises. Rilla imagines herself moving some papers aside, possibly a bestiary being closed. “Well, either way I’ll get some interesting data out of it. Even if it doesn’t regenerate when it dies, I’m sure I’ll be able to learn something useful in dissection.”

Arum stops the playback. He drums his claws off of the recorder in a rapid-fire staccato, still staring up at her in silence.

“Arum,” she tries again after a moment.

“I hope, human, that I have provided enough useful data in my convalescence that I have made up for the inconvenience of not dying and presenting you the option of weighing my internal organs.”

“That's not-”

“I knew it was all a lie, I knew there was no possibility that your precious little I am a doctor nonsense was genuine.”

“It was, Arum, I didn’t lie-”

“You kept me alive to gather data. You’ve been spoon-feeding me so as to get a better picture of how your knights might take me and my kin to pieces. None of this was because you-” he cuts off. “How long were you planning to maintain this little play-act? How long until your pet knight was meant to slit my throat? Did you simply want to get in sight of my nest before you destroyed me? How much data were you going to gather before you decided you had properly wrung me dry, Amaryllis?”

“That wasn’t what I-”

“Don’t lie to me, human! I have had enough of this farce.”

Rilla presses her lips together, her throat feeling tight. He’s not going to listen, right now. Not to her, not to-

He won’t listen to her now. But…

“Skip ahead on the recorder,” she says.

“What?”

“Skip to entry four two one one. Should be… eighteen to twenty after the one you just played, I think.”

“Why?” he snarls, ducking his head and clutching the recorder close against the bandages on his midsection.

“Because there’s something else you should hear, too. You heard what I said when I first found you. You should hear what I said after. If you really think that I’ve been using you for some sort of spy work, then the rest of it should interest you too, right?”

He hesitates, his expression tightening. “Perhaps I have no interest in hearing myself cataloged, doctor.”

“Please. Just- listen to it. And then you can decide if you want to- I don’t know. How you want to proceed. But before you make any sort of decision, please- please just listen, Arum.”

Arum stares at her for another long moment, suspicious with a growl in his throat, and then he moves his thumb, sending the recording forward with a thin squeal of sound. He overshoots the start of the entry a little, and it cuts in just in the middle of a word.

“-ter than that, and it seems like his frill is really starting to knit together properly. Finally. It’s been tricky since it’s only a half-conscious thing, the flaring, but- I mean, it’s hard to complain about. It’s always so funny when he gets indignant and it just- fwoops out like that and-”

She laughs on the recording, breathless, and Rilla remembers this moment with exact clarity. The door to his room had been cracked, she could just see half his face through the gap as he rested, the gentle light of early morning on his scales and his expression untroubled in sleep-

“He’s beautiful,” she says, and she still feels the little stunned swoop that realization had made her feel. “He’s… I didn’t know a monster could be so beautiful. I didn’t know they could be funny either, honestly, or- or-”

There is a pause.

“Saints…”

Another pause. Quite long.

“He… um. He’s improving by leaps and bounds, now,” she says, her voice a little clipped, a little muted. “He can almost stand on his own, though it tires him out. He’s… soon he’ll be well enough to travel, I think. Which means we’re going to have to have another conversation, soon, about- about exactly how we're gonna get him back home. And that shouldn’t… it shouldn’t hurt to think about that, should it? It’s good. It’s a good thing that he’s… soon he’ll be well enough to go home, to be free again, to go back where he belongs and rest and recover where he’ll be comfortable and safe, but-”

A little half-laugh.

“I’m gonna miss him, is the only thing. I’ve gotten so used to having him around, and- and even if he’s always arguing about the methodology he’s been so- it’s been nice to have him around when I’m doing my experiments, I mean- it would have taken me ages to think of modifying my bandages with machracnid silk, and the improvement to the elasticity is- but that isn’t even the point, you know? He’s just- he’s-”

Less of a laugh.

“It's almost time for him to go home. It’s the only way to keep him safe. The longer he stays here- I know Damien won't hurt him, not anymore. I think he’s seen it too, he’s seen how- how much- he’s seen Arum, really seen him. I know he has. But every day Arum stays here is another risk, is another chance that he’ll be seen or- and if that happens, then what? I don’t care what they do to me, I’m not afraid of them, but Arum- he’s still not strong enough to defend himself, and even if he was, what would he do against an armed squadron of knights? I wouldn’t be able to do anything to protect him, and- he- I can’t let that happen. I won’t. I won’t let the Citadel hurt him. So- so… so he has to go home. It doesn’t matter that I- it doesn’t matter how I feel. I have to get him home. He deserves- he-”

“Amaryllis?”

Arum’s voice, distant and a little distorted on the recorder, and Rilla-in-the-past gasps lightly. Rilla remembers pressing a hand to her mouth. Remembers plastering on a smile.

“I’m here, Arum. Just a second.” A rustle, and then, quieter, “I’m gonna make him well again. And then I’m gonna get him home. I’ll miss him… I’ll miss him so badly. But I’ll get him home. End of log.”

Arum stares at the device in his hand, his frill flaring around his head in a way that Rilla would otherwise think is appropriately comical. Now, it just makes her want to do something foolish.

The next entry starts a little too loud and they both jump, Arum pressing his thumb decisively down on the button to stop the playback. When he finally looks up at her again, his eyes are still guarded, but no longer furious.

“What… what was the point of that, then?” he asks, voice thick and low.

“To show you how I think about you now. That first day- I didn’t know you, Arum. And that’s not an excuse. Monsters aren’t- you aren’t what I thought you were, and I had no idea- I was cruel. I was callous and clinical in a way that I hate, and I’m sorry you had to hear that. But I was never, never doing any of this to get information on monsters for the knights. Never. And I would do anything to keep them from hurting you now.”

“You… why?”

“I care about you.”

“You do not. I heard- what you said, you wouldn’t simply turn-”

“I don’t agree with how I dealt with the situation, Arum. I- I don’t see you in the same way. Not anymore, and- honestly? I stopped seeing you that way the first time you woke up and I saw- I saw that look in your eyes. And then it got more and more obvious the longer I was around you, the more I talked to you. You… Arum, the luckiest moment of my entire life was when I happened to look at the lake at just the right time to see you. If I hadn’t- if-” she has to stop, to press a hand to her mouth. “I hate the thought that if I just hadn’t looked, you would have died out there. Died alone, in that much pain, out in the wilds. That- Arum, you’re- you deserve- you’re special to me, and I had no idea how special you would be when I first found you.”

“So why keep those notes, then?” he asks after a pause, his tone carefully blank.

“Because,” she says, frowning. “Because of this. Not you finding them, I mean, but because you don’t learn from mistakes if you try to bury them. I’m not going to try to make something go away because it’s inconvenient. I was horrible, the way I talked about you, the way I thought about you, about all monsters. There’s- there so much more out there than I ever knew, and I can’t believe I let myself be so ignorant of it for so long.” She shakes her head, then after a half second of hesitation she steps towards him. She reaches a hand out and- he misinterprets, lifting out the recorder for her to take. She moves her hand aside, instead, slipping her palm along the back of his hand and wrapping her fingers around his wrist. He inhales, sharp, his eyes widening as he looks up at her. “I’m sorry, Arum. Sorry that I talked about you like that, and sorry that you had to hear it after I- after I finally convinced you to trust me, even a little. I’m sorry, and I hope I haven’t- I hope I haven’t broken anything that can’t still be fixed.”

“Amaryllis,” he says, and then he drops his eyes. He does not move his hand, his grip on the recorder flexing awkwardly. “You- you’ve broken nothing, Amaryllis. We- you-”

His voice scatters off, unsure and lost, and after a moment he raises two more hands, one to grip the hem of his cape, and the other reaching by slow inches to brush his palm down her forearm until he can loosely wrap his fingers around her wrist, an echo of the way she is holding him. Her skin tingles at the touch, the gentleness and the cool strange texture both.

“You’ve broken nothing,” he repeats in a low murmur, and then he finally looks up at her again, that gentle violet pinning her in place. “You… you are meant for mending, Amaryllis.”

Her dark cheeks darken further, her lips parting in wordless surprise, and their arms are still clasped as they stare- they are simply staring at each other, now, and-

“Your…” Arum swallows, his thumb on her wrist moving just barely, just gently, tickling the skin at the heel of her palm. “Your heart is beating quite quickly, Amaryllis.”

“You know what a- a quick pulse feels like, in a human?” She asks, raising an eyebrow despite the slight breathlessness in her tone.

“I know what your pulse sounds like. I know when it is…” he trails off, possibly at the way she blinks, startled.

“You can- hear my heart?” She gives the smallest breath of laughter. “Your hearing is ridiculous, huh?”

“Vastly superior to you mammals, anyway,” he mutters, and he barely makes an effort to act as if he means it.

“Your heart is beating pretty fast too, you know,” She says quietly, and his hand flexes against her skin.

“Y-yes, well,” he glances aside, then he sits up a little straighter without pulling away before he meets her eye again. “I apologize, also. For- for ambushing you with this.”

“You don’t have to,” Rilla shakes her head. “I know that what I said was-”

“I have been searching for things to distrust. Digging for proof of deception, for anything that would indicate that your intentions were false, so that I could have some fuel for my anger. I wanted to be angry with you. It is not… easy for me, to accept help, or to- to indulge in hope.” His mouth presses into an uncomfortable line, his frill pressing tight against his neck. “Always you are harping on evidence and proof, and I know- I have seen-” he exhales sharply, not quite a sigh. “I know that you are… genuine, in… caring for me. I do not understand it, but I know. And if- if you- if you are willing to show me such so readily, I should be able to…”

“Arum, it’s okay. You don’t have to say anything,” Rilla says, and he shakes his head.

“If I ever-" he pauses. "When. When I return home, at last, I will… I will miss you as well, Amaryllis.”

Their eyes are fixed, each with a hand still gently clasped around the other’s wrist, and Rilla finds that she doesn't quite know how to breathe, with him looking at her like that. Not a great response, Rilla, keep it together-

“In fact,” Arum says very quietly, and his thumb brushes against her skin again and she shivers with gooseflesh instantly. “In fact, Amaryllis, I would say-”

“Rilla?”

Rilla only glances over her shoulder at the suddenness of Damien’s voice in the front room, but Arum pulls his hands away as if burned, his expression going shuttered and distant again. She can’t help the sting of frustration, at that. It’s not fair, of course. Damien is still… well, it’s difficult, anyway. But Rilla is stuck with her mind five seconds ago when Arum’s thumb was gentle on her wrist and he had started to say something. Something Rilla gets the feeling she’s not going to get the chance to know, now, like it’s been chased away. She feels like a glass that got struck on the edge of a table, still ringing. She wants to know where that moment was supposed to go, but now-

She sighs, smiling despite herself. “One sec, Damien,” she calls lightly. “Probably good that he reminded me,” she says, more casual than she feels as Arum looks up at her uncertainly. “I just got done making lunch. It should still be warm. Did you- do you want to join us? I promise I’ll make Damien behave, and if he doesn’t wanna he can just go eat on the stump outside again.”

She’s only half kidding, and the mild mischief in Arum’s eyes at that possibility manages to creep past his guarded veneer.

“I suppose that sounds… agreeable enough. I shall be interested to see if the little knight will stoop to share a table with a monster, today.”

“He’ll deal,” Rilla says. She takes the recorder back from him, and then lifts her hands out again. “Steady enough to stand, Arum?”

He frowns, but he looks aside and reaches an arm to allow her to help pull him up to standing. It’s still a little odd, looking up at him after spending so long with him in that bed, where he has to peer up at her. He still leans on her, just a little, though. Just a very little. Just enough that he could deny it, if asked. His body beside her own is heavy, slightly cool, fascinatingly textured, as always. She does her best not to think about that.

Damien watches them exit Arum's room with guarded eyes, but he does not mention their proximity, nor does he comment on it when Rilla helps Arum settle himself on one of the cushions around the table. After a quiet moment, while Rilla takes her own seat between them, Damien takes the pitcher of water, and he fills three glasses.

"What…" Arum pushes a small stack of books aside after dinner, pulling one thin volume out from beneath the rest, and his eyes are narrowed and confused when Rilla glances his way. "What is this?"

Ah. Damn. Rilla absolutely hadn't meant to leave that out- she must have slipped it in with the wrong pile before she put her dads' books back under the floorboards. "Oh," she says, trying to sound casual. Damien is looking at the book too, now, which isn't exactly great. "Uh. I'm not sure. I haven't been able to translate it properly, so I only kind of have an idea what's in there."

Arum frowns, something that isn't quite suspicion crossing his face. "… is this why you asked me about monster languages, before?"

Rilla blinks. "What? No, I just wanted to make sure I wasn't gonna bring you a stack of books you couldn't even read."

Arum seems satisfied enough with that answer, but still he turns the slim book in his hands, eying the cover. "Hm. This is simply a coincidental curiosity, then?"

"It- I couldn't find you in my bestiaries, so I wound up pulling out… well-"

"You kept your fathers' books?" Damien asks softly, and she doesn't look at him, trying hard not to wince. "I thought their more…" he coughs, "questionable possessions were- were confiscated."

"Most of them were," Rilla says, her tone going bitter. "Not all. I kept what I could."

"You were looking for me?" Arum says, an eyebrow raising.

"Well-" Rilla glances between the pair of them. "Yeah. I figured that if I could find out exactly what you were it would help me figure out how to treat you more effectively. No such luck, by the way."

Oddly, Arum smiles at that, something smug in the expression as he flips through the pages, his scales making a whispery noise against the paper. "It seems you managed my treatment quite skillfully, regardless, Amaryllis."

Damien narrows his eyes, as if he's trying to find a way to make that sentence fit as a dig instead of a compliment, and then he shakes his head and refocuses on Rilla.

"Why did you not tell me?"

"It- I mean, when we started seeing each other it wasn't like-" her eyes flick around the hut, noting uncomfortably the way that Arum is watching her too. "You're a knight, Damien, I didn't know when I met you that you wouldn't get me in worse trouble for-"

"Oh, my darling flower-"

"It wasn't like I lied, Damien, I just- I didn't know how to bring it up. I-" she pauses, and tries a vague sort of smile. "It just kind of got to the point where I hadn't talked about it for so long, you know? Got to a point where it seemed- like it'd been too long already, and I couldn't change my mind about it."

Damien sighs deeply, reaching a hand out to cup her cheek. "Oh, Rilla… I am sorry you felt that there was anything you could not share wi-"

"I could translate this for you," Arum interrupts, and the both of them turn towards him. He isn't looking at them in return, his eyes firmly on the book as his tail coils tightly around an ankle. "The dialect is somewhat more eastern than I am entirely used to, but the bones of the language seem familiar enough. I suppose you already inferred from the illustrations and the size that it is a rather limited botanical census."

"Yeah," Rilla says, her voice bright with surprise. "Yeah, that's exactly what I was hoping." She pauses. "You'd really be willing to do that?"

"It's a book of herbs, Amaryllis. You can hardly do any harm with it." He glances towards her, his eyes guarded, and then he looks to the book again. "Seems a small sort of service I can easily provide. It shall not even begin to edge the scales between us towards even, I should think," he mutters, and then before she can respond to that, he points to one of the entries in the middle. "We can start here. I do not suppose you are familiar with this herb at all. It grows in a rather small range, quite a ways to the East."

Rilla doesn't want to let him deflect from the fact that he apparently sees her treatment of him as transactional, but she doesn't want to have that sort of conversation with Damien a foot away, either. She's already had one awkward conversation in front of someone who probably didn't want to be there, tonight. "Yeah, that would be- incredible, actually. Just let me grab the notes I already made, and-" she stands, and she tries not to look too uncomfortable or too eager as she goes to pull up the false floorboard in her bedroom to fetch the right journal. "Okay," she says as she returns, shuffling through the pages, "so I managed to work out the numeral system, I think, if you want to just check my work there before we dig into the conte-"

"Knock knock. "

The voice comes simultaneous with an accompanying actual knock, on the doorframe and not the actual door from the sound of it, and Rilla flinches hard enough that she drops the book in her hand to thwump to the floor. Damien rolls from his seated position to snatch it before she can, his own expression openly concerned, and Arum's frill is pressed tightly to his neck as he eyes the door in alarm, his tail coiling and then curling around his own ankle.

Rilla pats a hand in the air, a gesture for quiet, and no one moves for a long moment as she waits for whoever the hell to take the hint. It's late, even on a day when she was open she'd be unlikely to come to the door at this hour.

"Knock, uh, knock?" the voice comes again. "C'mon, Rilla, your favorite guest is here! I know you're home, there's smoke coming from the chimney-"

"Marc. Shit," Rilla scrambles, reaching to help Arum pull himself to his feet as she calls, "we're closed, come back- come back later. Tomorrow! Come back tomorrow!"

"Marc," Damien mutters, clutching the book to his chest with a scowl.

"C'mon, Rilla. I know you've got a minute for your best friend," Marc calls through the door. "Can you open up?"

"Dammit," Rilla hisses, and Arum chokes down a very nervous sort of laugh as Rilla presses a hand against his shoulder, making sure he's standing stable. "Marc, I really can't hang out with you right now! I'm- I'm right in the middle of-"

"I, uh, really, really can't, Rilla. Can you-" he pauses, and she can hear Dampierre's hooves shifting against the dirt. "Can you please open up? I… uh…"

Rilla stiffens, grits her teeth, and sighs. "You're… out of medicine."

There is a pause.

"I'm out of medicine," Marc confirms in a quick mutter. "But! But only just barely, Rilla, like, less than five minutes ago barely!"

"Marc!" Rilla complains, and then she stops herself to take a deep breath. She can handle this. She just- has to make up enough for the day, and then- then she can get him out of her hair for long enough to make a proper batch he can pick up tomorrow. She frowns at Arum, and then at Damien, and then she calls out, "Two minutes, Marc. Give me two minutes, alright?"

Marc gives some sort of relieved confirmation, but Rilla isn't really paying attention anymore as she walks Arum partway across the room, and then she passes the monster into Damien's arms as the knight splutters, his cheeks going dark as Arum hisses in alarm.

"Shush," she says with a scowl. "Damien, just walk him to his bed. Please? He can't be in here, we can't risk him being seen and I just- have to get Marc out of here."

"But," Damien squeaks, "but Rilla, I-"

Damien doesn't strain under Arum's weight, he's perfectly capable of supporting the monster, but he leans away awkwardly, leaving Arum to grit his teeth and sway in a way that makes Rilla instantly nervous. Her scowl deepens and she steps closer again to push Arum more securely into Damien's grip as each of them makes another quiet, indignant noise. "Into Arum's room, Damien, now. If you drop him I will be furious with you. No time to argue. Just do it."

Damien swallows, then meets Arum's eyes for only a moment before his cheeks darken further and he looks sharply away. He nods, though, and shuffles Arum into his room, the both of them wincing through the movement as Rilla marches in the other direction to throw the front door open and glower up at Marc as he raises an eyebrow at her.

"Is there- uh. D'you have company over, Rilla? Because you could have just said- "

"Marc? Please shut up," she says, already turning back and marching to start throwing together ingredients, her hands moving quickly over bottles and jars. "You know I'm busy, and if you and Tal want to stop by with no warning then you don't get to complain that I'm not ready to jump up and help!"

"Well I mean- it's just me, this time."

He sounds sheepish, and Rilla glances over her shoulder in surprise. "Wh- huh. Where's Tal, then?"

"Doing something dumb somewhere dumber," Marc scowls.

"Marc." Rilla turns away again, snatching up ingredients as she goes. "Come on."

"He stayed behind to take a job, and- if he just stayed with me we wouldn't have gotten lost and we definitely would have gotten here a lot sooner!"

"Sure," she says. "Whatever." Rilla can't actually decide if it would have been better or worse if the pair of them had visited a week or so ago. Might have been awkward for the boys to come knocking when Arum was collapsed by her front door, at the very least. Her lip pulls into a frown and she refocuses, rattling off the list of components as she mixes them together, but when she reaches for the last of the bunch-

She pulls down an empty jar. And then a second empty jar.

"Oh, come on. Really?"

"Uh, what's up?"

"The Numb-Cap. I'm out," Rilla groans, dropping her head to thunk off of the cabinet in front of her. "I used all of it because I had to make up so many batches of painkiller for-"

She pauses.

"For?" Marc calls warily, and Rilla grits her teeth.

"Another patient, Marc, because you're not the only person relying on me!"

"Well, I mean, uh. If you made up so much of it-"

"I made so much because I needed it, Marc! And even if I hadn't used it up, it's not even the same recipe as your pills. Which means- " she cuts off into an exasperated exhale, smacking her palms on the counter.

"Which means- what?"

"I need to go get more Numb-Cap. Now . And leave-"

She cuts herself off again.

"Well- I mean, if you're too busy to leave I can run off and collect the dumb mushrooms myself, right? I'll just grab a few and come back and-"

"There is no way I would trust mushroom identification to any untrained non-mycologist in the middle of the night, let alone you, Marc," she growls, marching towards the door and grabbing her boots. "You wanna have actual effective medicine, or d'you wanna wake up in a week with no clothes and no idea where you've been? Or, more likely, just choke to death on some fun magic poison?"

"Well, that first one doesn't sound so bad-"

"Marc." Rilla grips the doorframe tight. "This is, and I need you to understand this, wildly inconvenient for me right now, but I'm going to go out into the jungle with you, collect some stupid mushrooms in the dark, and come back to make more medicine for you. But first you gotta just- chill out here for a minute while I t- while I grab my stuff. Okay?"

"Yeah," Marc says, sounding just barely chastised enough as Dampierre whickers and stamps beneath him. "Uh. Yeah, Rilla, okay."

She sighs, then presses the door firmly closed so she can gather herself for a moment before she darts to the exam room. Arum is sitting on the edge of the bed, staring at the door as she enters, and Damien is carefully placed at the opposite end of the room leaning against a counter until he sees her enter, at which point he straightens up again.

"You're leaving? " Arum asks before she can say a word, and Damien stumbles as he crosses the room.

"What?!"

"That is what she just told the loud one at the door," he growls, gesturing towards her with narrowed eyes.

"Rilla you can't possibly-"

"I really can possibly, Damien," she says, grabbing a pair of work gloves from the counter and then coming close enough to grab Damien's hands tight. "Marc needs that medicine and it won't work without the ingredient I'm missing. It'll probably only be a few hours, I know where they usually grow, but it's a bit of a walk."

"But Rilla, surely- if you are venturing into the jungle then I must accompany-"

"I'll be fine, Damien, Marc and I can handle anything that happens. And I-" she squeezes his hands, winces. "I need you here a lot more."

"Here? But-" he looks towards Arum, and then they both look away.

"You realize that I do not require moment-by-moment babysitting, Amaryllis," Arum snarls.

"Precisely, and I-"

"Damien, I really don't want to have to deal with you and Marc fighting while I'm already stressed out about making sure he gets his next pill before his last one wears off," she admits in a rush, and Damien winces. "Please, please just stay here, don't fight for like, just a few hours, I promise, and- and everything will be fine. Just keep an eye on the stew and bring him a bowl when it's done, okay? That's your one job. Just that, and not fighting. And preferably not freaking out, either. Can you do that for me, Damien? Please?"

He wilts, just a little, his eyes going soft and his hands pulling her close enough that he can press a kiss to her temple. "Of course. Of course I can. Such small favors you ask of me, my love," he says, very lightly, and she laughs. "Of course. I should be used to the urgency with which your brilliance is needed, by now."

She breathes a laugh, then kisses his cheek before she pulls back from his hands, eying Arum (his own eyes carefully turned away from the both of them again). "You too, okay?"

"Me too, what, precisely?" he mutters. "I will not be going anywhere, and so long as the little songbird does not shoot me I cannot imagine I would have any way of coming to harm."

Damien scowls, but Rilla steps a bit closer to the monster, reaching out to tap the tip of his snout lightly, making him blink and hiss lightly in response.

"A couple hours. Just be nice, for Saints' sake. Or-" she laughs. "For my sake, at least."

Arum frowns (or pouts, more accurately), but something about the way his lip twitches makes her think he's trying to clamp down on a smile, and that makes her feel a little better about this whole thing when she returns to the door.

"Don't have too much fun without me," she says, and as they both splutter she closes the door behind her.

[->]

#elle's fanfic #scattered on my shore #the penumbra podcast #second citadel #rad bouquet #lizard kissin' tuesday #amaryllis of exile #lord arum #sir damien #[other character tag redacted]

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jokertrap-ran · 5 years

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A3! (Act! Addict! Actors!) VIVID WINTER EP LIMITED Guy SR【VIVID WINTER】『NIGHT FLOWER〜Ranunculus〜/ 1』

*Spoiler free: Translations will remain under cut *Name will remain as my normal ( ラン ) *Ranunculus is a Persian Buttercup

Part 1 / Part 2

Azuma: How unusual for you to call for everyone to gather here, Tsumugi.

Homare: Something you don’t want others to know, perhaps?

Tsumugi: No, of course not. I just thought that this was the perfect place for the conversation I’m about to have with all of you.

Guy: I’ve visited this cafe together with you once, Tsumugi. The flowers look…much more beautiful than they had previously.

Tsumugi: Guy-san…I’m glad to hear that you feel that way.

Tsumugi: Oh, let’s all order a drink first.

Tasuku: Right. I’ll just get a black coffee then…

Azuma: As for me…Oh, I suppose this will do.

Homare: Tea for me, of course.

Hisoka: Marshmallow…

Tsumugi: Haha, so it’s a hot cocoa with marshmallows for Hisoka?

‿︵ ‿︵︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵ ‿︵ ‿︵

Tsumugi: Have we all settled our orders? Alright, then let’s get right to the main point.

Tsumugi: There seems to be an event called the “Midnight Garden” where you can enjoy the scenery of the botanical garden at night and–

Tsumugi: I was walking around inside the garden, when I got a job for an improv.

Hisoka: A job for us of the MANKAI Company, specifically?

Azuma: That’s a job that really suits our theater company to the T.

Tsumugi: There’ll be a daily rotation with 3 people from each Troupe, so we’ll have to choose 2 members to go along with their respective Troupe Leaders.

Tsumugi: This is a night-only event, so it might be somewhat of a short notice, but I also wanted to arrange it around all of your work schedules…

Guy: I see. This day works for me.

Azuma: Sorry, but I’ve got something on…

Homare: I apologize, for I’ve got an autograph session on that day.

Hisoka: Zzz…I’m a no-go too…zz…

Homare: All of your marshmallows are gone. Only the marshmallows!!

Tasuku: I’m free.

Tsumugi: Great! We’ve got enough to go around for a 3-man team. So, we’ll settle for this arrangement, okay?

Tasuku: Sure.

Guy: Of course. I wish to try my hand at it.

Tasuku: Has what our act is going to be about been decided yet?

Tsumugi: The setting’s one where flowers turn into humans in the dead of the night. Of course, it seems like the type of flower we’re going to act as has been left up to our own personal choices.

Tasuku: Flowers? …Sounds rather tough.

Tsumugi: That’s why I limited our flowering choices to what our Troupe represents. We’re the Winter Troupe, so of course, we’ll be handling the flowers than bloom in winter.

Tsumugi: That being said, I do hope we can settle on what flower we want to be acting as by the end of this little session we have here…

Guy: What have you thought up?

Tsumugi: Narcissus, Orchid and Ranunculus.

Guy: Ranunculus…

Tsumugi: Pique your interest?

Guy: …Yeah, a little.

Tsumugi: Heh. I knew you’d say. I’ll leave the role of playing the Ranunculus up to you then.

Guy: Understood.

Tsumugi: And now we have the Narcissus and the Orchid left. Pick your poison, Tasuku.

Tasuku: I don’t mind either. Flowers are still flowers at the end of the day, no matter what species they are, so just choose whatever you’d like and I’ll take the remaining one.

Tsumugi: Hmm…They both seem like they’d be equally interesting roles.

Tasuku: I don’t suppose you can make a decision then…?

Homare: Alas, how about I pick the lot for the both of you based on my own inference of which flower suits you best?

Tsumugi: Homare-san? You’ll do that for us?

Homare: Of course. Allow me to choose a flower that best represents you with this artistic sense of mine!

Homare: Hmm…The Narcissus is a rustic flower with amazing resilience! I feel that this flower suits you best, Tsumugi-kun.

Homare: The Orchid is a dignified flower, one rooted firmly onto the ground, unshakable. I’d say this one’s for Tasuku-kun!

Hisoka: You’re uncannily sharp this time round.

Homare: Hisoka-kun! Since when were you awake?

Azuma: I think that’s a fine idea as well.

Tsumugi: I feel kinda embarrassed when a second-opinion says the same…

Tasuku: So, I believe we’ve all come to a decision for the time being.

Tsumugi: Alright then! I’ll be playing the role of a Narcissus, Tasuku will be the Orchid and Guy-san will be taking up the Ranunculus.

Tsumugi: I’ll be going down to take a look at how things are together with the director next time, so I think we’ll be able to get a better grasp on the picture then.

Tsumugi: Oh! I’ll also lend you all one of my picture books about flowers that I recommend.

Tasuku: Got it.

Guy: Understood.

‿︵ ‿︵︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵ ‿︵ ‿︵

Azuma: Guy? What are you doing?

Guy: I’m having a little trouble building up this role I’m supposed to play as.

Azuma: If so, then how does a breather to clear your mind sound? Drink with me?

Guy: Japanese Sake?

Azuma: I got it from an acquaintance of mine. I’ve heard that this one’s reputed to taste divine.

Guy: Very well. I shall join you.

Azuma: Still, you’re trying to build a role? Is this for the event we were all called out to discuss earlier?

Guy: Indeed. I’m a little concerned, what with the emotions I have to express when acting as a human…

Guy: I have to build up a convincing personality from scratch, if I am to play as a flower. And that’s starting to sound harder and harder.

Azuma: Yeah, that does sound tough.

Guy: I’ve researched quite a bit into the matter, and have found that the meaning of flowers in flower language, changes depending on the color of the flower in question. I’m concerned and unsure regarding which particular meaning I should be using as a means of expressing myself.

Azuma: That’s true. The Ranunculus comes in quite a few colours.

Guy: Precisely. I didn’t notice that the Ranunculus that Tsukioka was growing was actually a red one until now. That being said–

Guy: I’ve looked through the picture book that I borrowed from him and I remember seeing a yellow Ranunculus once, in the past.

Azuma: So it’s a flower that you have a past connection to. It’s truly a pity that I can’t be there on the actual day itself, but I’ll be cheering you on.

Guy: I see. Thank you.

Azuma: …I’m sure you’ll perform well out there. It’s a flower that perfectly resonates with you, after all.

#a3!#act! addict! actors!#a-three #translations #エースリー #guy #otome #hino Satoshi

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jawnjendes · 5 years

Text

the truth hurts but secrets kill | shawn mendes

chapter 8/?, university au, shawn x goth oc

AN: lol the taglist didnt work on my last chapter so if you havent read but i’ll show you my teeth pls do eet. anyways this chapter is an angsty buildup full of angst. my specialty.

***let me know if you wanna be added/removed from the taglist

masterlist | playlist coming soon

"Where do you live?" Annalise asked for what felt like the thousandth time.

"Do you even think she's capable of answering?" Patrick said, his arm supporting Alessia's waist as he helped her stumble down the university road.

The Lyft to campus went without any major issue. Alessia did not puke in the car, she merely leaned against the door in the backseat. Annalise had gotten annoyingly chatty with the driver, talking about childhood trauma and the inevitability of death. She claimed it was practice for when she's a real therapist, though the driver was trying to focus on the road. Patrick left the driver a generous tip through the app.

The three of them were left just close enough to the dorms, but there was still a walk to be had, and it felt like it was taking centuries with how much Alessia slowed them down. Annalise kept looking around at the dark surroundings as they paced with her pocket knife in hand. Alessia mumbled something incoherent, her head lolling from side to side.

"I've never heard of that building, where is it?" Annalise asked her.

"Dude, you're gonna have to take her back to your place," Patrick told her. "I don't even think she knows her own name."

With a reluctant sigh, Annalise closed her pocket knife and wrapped her arm around the smaller girl's waist. They were approaching the corner where she and Patrick would typically part ways. Alessia noticed the shift and leaned all her weight into Annalise, mumbling under her rancid breath. It wasn't her first time babysitting a drunk toddler, but that doesn't mean she likes doing it.

Patrick was kind enough to walk the two girls up to Annalise's dorm. Alessia was swaying ominously in the elevator, like she wanted to be cradled like a baby. She was definitely ready for bed.

"Ya casi, mi vida," Annalise said as they stumbled down the third floor corridor.

"Why do you call her that?" Patrick asked. "’Me veeda.’ Isn't that what you would call your boyfriend?"

"It's the same thing as a waitress would call you sweetie or something," she replied. "Or the way you'd talk to a toddler. A drunk one."

She managed to pull her key from her back pocket and give it to Patrick. He unlocked the appropriate door, and the three of them were met with more people and more loud music.

Apparently, Stella hadn't planned on staying alone this Saturday night. She was on the armchair, with Camila squished in right next to her. They weren't alone, either. Shawn and Brian were on the couch, each holding a beer. All four of them stared at the two goths holding the short normie up on two feet.

"Oh my god, you're right on time!" Stella exclaimed. "Shawn's working on an EP! He's giving a us a preview! And he made another duet with Camila!"

"Este guey se puso peda," Annalise said with mild snark, gesturing to the girl on her arm. "I'm gonna put her down."

"You're gonna kill her?" Patrick asked, his blue eyes wide. "Damn, I didn't know you hated her that much!"

"Shut up, I brought her here, didn't I?"

She did not look at the guests on the couch as she carefully led Alessia to her bedroom. She ignored Patrick starting up a conversation with everyone. She had things to do, and it was hard enough with her fluffy mind racing.

"There we go, my dear," she said as she sat the intoxicated girl on the bed. "Acuestate, mija. Tomorrow's gonna suck, but you can rest now."

She patted Alessia's head before moving to take off her sneakers. Then, Annalise took her phone from her jacket pocket and plugged it into the charger on then nightstand. Before she could sigh in relief that they all made it back alive, she heard a voice at the door.

"Hey, you."

When Annalise turned to face him, it was like a million fireworks went off at once. Her entire body froze in the best way, and the air in her lungs was knocked out of her. He's even prettier in person.

"Someone have too much fun?" he asked, nodding towards the now sleeping Alessia.

Annalise could not tear her eyes away from his face long enough to think of an answer. All she wanted to do was stare at him for the rest of eternity.

Then, Patrick came up from behind Shawn, an amused grin on his face. "Bro, she's high as a kite right now."

Shawn looked confused for a moment and then turned to him. "Ann doesn't smoke."

"She used to all the fucking time last year." Patrick was still grinning. "She wanted to have fun tonight, so I gave her a hit of my pen."

"So you drugged her up, eh?"

"Bro-"

"I'm not your bro. Don't you care about her health at all? Don't you remember she was in the hospital a couple of months ago?"

The grin faded. "I care about her and her freedom. Not that I have to explain that to you." Patrick excused himself.

Annalise heard every word, but her wide eyes were still on Shawn. She was stepping towards him before she even realized, and then her arms were going around his middle. He was still warm and soft and he smelled good. It was like personified crack. Annalise smiled as her head rested on his chest. "I love you, my baby."

Shawn hesitated, but he hugged her back. "Love you too." Then he pulled back, his hands on her shoulders. "Where are you gonna sleep?"

"The couch." Annalise's fingers were gripping the back of his t-shirt.

"You sure? Wouldn't you rather come stay with me? I'm leaving soon anyway."

Annalise giggled so much her voice squeaked. But she frowned almost instantly. "Don't be like Chad."

"Who's Chad?"

"No one important. I think sober Annalise is gonna be mad at you."

"What? Why?"

She pointed to the sleeping girl on the bed. "That one told high Annalise some things. Sober Annalise might not even remember, but if she does, she'll probably talk to you on check in day. Like, actual talking this time."

"Why can't we talk now?" Shawn asked. "I think high-you will be more understanding than sober-you."

"High Annalise is stupidly in love with you. We'll get nowhere, my dear."

He chewed the inside of his cheek as he gazed down at her. "Yeah, you always call me cute names when you're on drugs. Like that time in the hospital. And all those times you got high with me. Oh wait…" he trailed off. "Every time I asked you to smoke with me you said you didn't trust me enough. But tonight you trusted somebody else, eh?"

She giggled. "I knew you'd be mad at me too. We have much to talk about, baby boy."

In theory, the reason for Alessia's disappearance the following morning would be that she remembered the tea she spilled upon waking up and now she wanted to avoid the wrath of the goth girlfriend. In reality, she wouldn't be entirely wrong.

Even after sleeping for twelve hours, Annalise couldn't get those bits of forbidden information out of her head. She had dreams about catching Shawn and Alessia having really loud sex, but she woke up to hear her roommate doing exactly that. Then, she had a recurring dream of Shawn admitting to cheating on her, except this time he had twelve versions of Henry the orange tabby surrounding him. The last dream she remembered having was one where she ended up back in the hospital, and that she was given no anesthesia for her surgery. She had her stomach removed, and she watched every drop of blood and guts come out of the gaping hole in her body.

She woke with a start after every one of these vivid dreams. Maybe it was the after effects of being stoned, but she felt uneasy for that whole day. She typically binged to her heart's content, but the hospital dream was still on her mind. She allowed herself to have a Lunchables, but not much else.

Then, Monday rolled around and Annalise found it difficult to act like a person. She got out of bed, had an unsatisfying breakfast. She did it, and that's the only thing that matters right? Screw all the other feelings. The paranoia she felt after the Abnormal Psych lecture about eating disorders doesn't matter. The impending embarrassing discomfort from sitting alone at a table in Bio Lab doesn't matter either. Who cares about the sad ache in her chest after seeing Shawn and Alessia leave their class together? Who cares if they're still in high spirits even though they knew that Annalise knew? Who cares?

Annalise doesn't, that's for damn sure. She was perfectly fine. She pushed herself out of bed today even though she wanted nothing more than to induce a coma on herself. Who cares if she still felt shitty after?

Although, she was putting off the impending chat with Shawn until check in on Saturday. He had to know it was coming, why else would he just stop texting her?

Unless he's already with Alessia, and therefore playing me like a violin. Maybe Shawn was just ignoring me to make me go crazy.

"Oh, for fuck's sake," Annalise whispered as she put on her headphones. She was glad she caught herself slipping, she didn't want the wide-eyed crazies on display as she walked out of the Social Studies building.

Her steps were slower and more careful as she picked a song to play from her phone. After settling for Halsey, she pulled out her black, round sunglasses and put them on. Gotta hide them nightmare eyes.

Maybe… perhaps… I need to check in earlier than normal?

"Don't be stupid," she told herself.

It wouldn't hurt though, would it? Maybe he would be happy to see me since I would be breaking my own rule. Unless, of course, he's hanging around Alessia again. Perhaps he doesn't care anymore.

The only solution Annalise had was to dump herself on the couch in the dorm and play Tetris 99 until the thoughts and feelings sorted themselves out.

When Stella came home, she knew the drill. She sat on the couch and ranted about her day. She rambled on about her fascist history professor and the lack of a GSA club on campus. Then, she mentioned a Halloween party coming up at one of the frat houses, and that she needed a hot costume.

It was the month where Annalise and all her spooky darkness was socially acceptable, and she couldn't even be excited about it. A different type of darkness was taking over, and it was stupid that it was over a boy. Why did she have to be so dramatic? Why was she so goddamn crazy?

"I'll pick your costume," she said over Stella's rambling.

She paused, her brilliant hazel eyes wide. To say she was surprised that Annalise cracked so fast would be an understatement. But she smiled. "Would you? Ooo, can I pick yours?"

"Ah, I don't think I'm gonna do anything for Halloween this year."

"What? But it's your favorite holiday! You need to come to this party with me! Buddy system, remember?"

"Is that the only reason-"

"Of course not, you dummy! We haven't spent enough time together since the semester started! Let's go find some costumes, yeah? I'll even let you dress me up as scary as you want!"

Stella's a good friend. Annalise should really try harder to spend time with her. Why didn't she try to be a good friend in return?

They went to the local costume store that Friday. It gave Annalise a wonderful excuse to not go to the gaming club meeting. She really did not want to reflect on the Bart adventure, or see just how bad she fucked up Chad's nose.

After returning to campus with a dark but still cute witch costume, Stella was summoned to Camila's dorm. She thanked Annalise for the lovely costume choice and practically abandoned her. Annalise couldn't find it in her to really care. It was only a few more hours until Saturday.

She had barely settled herself on the couch when her phone buzzed. For the first time this week, Shawn had texted her. Annalise held her phone up, staring blankly at the screen. Her heart should be pounding right now, shouldn't it?

"Hey, I know check in is tomorrow but I can't make it at our usual time. I have a gig tomorrow night. You should come and we can talk after."

The next text was the address to the lounge he would be performing at.

Any other time, Annalise would have been happy to know Shawn was performing again. But he cancelled on her, knowing that he was in trouble. Is that what it took for him to start booking shows again? Was this just an elaborate way to avoid Annalise? Perhaps this was just some form of reverse psychology so she wouldn't go to the gig.

You can't psych out a psychology major. Of course Annalise was going to this gig.

However, she had a mostly sleepless night, really unable to shake the fact that Shawn was probably avoiding her. When she finally did sleep, she slept too much. Annalise woke up in the afternoon and was late for work. She had planned to ask if she could leave early, but she didn't dare try anything now. The gig was at eight, when her shift ended. She ended up going to the lounge in her work uniform, a button up with the dealership name on, and baggy slacks. Not exactly the sexy outfit she had planned during the late hours of insomnia.

The show had already started by the time she got there. As she was showing her ID to the bouncer, she heard Shawn's voice over the mic, and she felt something for the first time in days. Her stomach felt tight as she slowly stepped into the lounge.

The turnout was decent. Every single table and bar stool was occupied, and all eyes were on the band performing on the stage. Annalise looked around for any empty space; She wasn't dressed her best but she did want to be anywhere but against the wall opposite the stage. Her eyes spotted the group of people standing directly in front of the stage.

It was the normal group of girls who swooned every time Shawn blinked, but there were also three other girls that Annalise knew all too well. They were jumping and singing along to Lost in Japan, not a single care in the world. Annalise wondered why Stella didn't tell her that she was going to this event, but the way she looked at Camila as they sang to each other said enough. Maybe they chose Alessia to be their new third wheel too. So Alessia was too embarrassed to face Annalise, but not Shawn?

Annalise always stood in the back of every one of Shawn's shows, knowing she would stick out like a sore thumb in the midst of the usual fangirls. Not that that's a bad thing, it just wasn't her usual place to be. She figured that showing up at all would be enough.

Perhaps Shawn already had enough. Three of his friends were already cheering him on, and surely he had more of them scattered in the audience. Not to mention, the people here that didn't know him were going to adore him by the end of the night. Besides, Shawn most likely invited her as a ploy to get her to turn it down. She wasn't needed here. Annalise chewed the inside of her lip as she back up towards the exit. She stepped outside, away from the people trying to get in, and she pulled her phone out. She composed a new text:

"Hey, I'm drowning in work so I won't make it to your show. I'll meet you at your place later so we can talk🖤"

_______

taglist: @normalcyisoverrated-beyou @ilsolee @mendesromano @1-800-khalid-mendussy @kitykatnumber @strangerliaa @iloveshawnieboi @poppyshawn @shawnsunflower @shawnvvmendes @ruinhoney @someoneunimportantxx @calyumthomas @yourdeflightfullyleft @havethetimeeofyourlifee @shawmndes @wronglanemendes @chillingbythesea

#shawn mendes #shawn mendes fanfic #shawn mendes imagine #shawn mendes blurb #shawn mendes smut #shawn x goth gf #yaint ready for the next chapter lol #im not even ready #it was so draining to write omg

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precenna · 5 years

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Season 7 Speculation (SDCC)

Alright guys I got some info for AOS. As you all know San Diego Comic-Con was last weekend, which was a big deal for AOS becuase it will be their last SDCC as they are now done filming (they informed us there that they were finishing up the very last ep and we all, as an audience, sobbed). I did get the opportunity to go and see their panel as well as observe both their meet and greets (I also sobbed there too, it was emotional for me). During their panel, however, something a lot of people forgot about was one of the answers to the speed round questions that hold a lot of potential for the final season conflict.

During their panel on Thursday, the fans got to do their usual Q and A, BUT since we ran out of time reminiscing it was forced into a speed round (and I was SOOO CLOSE to asking them my question! AGH!) The questions were reduced answers of yes or no which one of the last ones was “Why havent the cast experienced the snap” or “Why hasnt the show lined up with the snapture” to which the directors quickly responded, They just havent gotten to it yet...

We all guessed this was coming, the cast would experience the snap and deal with the effects, but now I believe we do have confirmation from the directors/ writers that this will happen soon. Which leaves the question, which characters will vanish?

Im gonna cover FS here specifically becuase I am the most interested to see what their outcome will be:

So in my mind this can only go one of two ways. I am not a fan of the idea that the writers will have one of them will snap away. Considering the fact that half of this season was finding their way back to each other and getting them back to where they left off, it would feel like half of this season would be redundant. All the emotional trauma they have been conflicted with the past 5-6 years has been confronted and they are FINALLY working on patching all of it up! Not only that, Fitz has already died! It is just not the logical move to have Fitz ash away because he just came back from being dead! And Jemma has spent a year trying to get him back! Would it really make sense for Jemma to dust away right when she accomplishes her mission? When they just started to resolve all their fears and traumas?! They would have gone through that whole arc for nothing! No pay off, not to mention it would make a lot of fans mad from using the constant ripping each other apart story line. (Still I would never put it past them...)

So we have two options left; both of them snapping away or neither of them. Honestly, as sad as it will be, I think that both of them are going to end up on the unlucky side of the snap. It makes sense when you think about it too. They have been consistently saying “I am never leaving your side again”. I believe the writers are going to FINALLY honour that promise. Even if they end up doing it in a heart wrenching way, with both of them snapping they will still be sticking to their “No matter what happens, I will be there by your side to comfort you. To protect you.” pledge! It would be a reassuring way for them to depart becuase we, as the fans, would know they are resting in peace for those 5 years TOGETHER! Not apart like all the other times, but finally together like they always should be. Jemma even stated this in ep 6 of season 6 when she finally was reunited with Fitz she proclaimed, “I don’t’ give a damn if we ever escape” because she is perfectly content with staying with Fitz in the mind prison for all eternity. All she needs is to be with him, and we all know Fitz feels the exact same way (after all they are “physically-linked”!)

On the other side of things, the writers could have them both stay. FS are the ideal agents that S.H.I.E.L.D was based upon. We heard Mack say this earlier in season 6 and Coulson say it MANY times. Mack originally wanted FS to work on rebuilding the S.H.I.E.L.D Academy, but with Fitz’s, ahem, incident, and Jemma leaving for space to retrieve him, he couldnt have them work on the project. At least, not until they got back. If the writers decide to have them stay, they would get a 5 year “head start” on rebuilding the Academy with Dr. Benson (assuming he dosen’t ash as well). To add on to this idea, it could also be the chance FS have to finally start their family. (Although this is less likely becuase we have less evidence for it.) We all know the secrecy of the last season has been BRUTAL, but they did it for a reason. It has been speculation that Liz and Iain were seen on set with a little girl for the last ep. That is all I have heard however. At SDCC Liz and Iain were not there for the last signing becuase that Friday they were filming their final scenes together (which A, confirms we have Iain on set, and B proves we have a FS finale of some kind).

The directors also answered that they will be giving this series a happy ending with everything that the fans imagine becuase that is what all these characters deserve, happiness. So I am sure by the end of the series we will see them with their family already made (Yes!!!), but as for all the previous eps, that is more of a clouded line. As I said before, I am not a fan of the one disappears trope. But there is some evidence for it as well... We all know Iain has not been confirmed on set for a while becuase of work elsewhere, which means, you guessed it, a chance for him to be caught in the snap. The absent timing makes sense ,unless they waited to do all his scenes later when he was available, and gives explanation to a missing Fitz in the action (I do have other theories on that as well). Although I pray this is not the path they choose to go on it can be backed by schedules and timing. It is always a possibility...

If you guys want to see all the questions asked I am sure there are so many vids on the internet that you can find to watch the panel; it was honestly one of the greatest moments of my life to see them all walk out on stage! To watch the banter they all have with one another while still staying strong for the fans, and themselves, as they film what will be the last of our favourite show. This post was getting long so I figured I’d end it here but if anyone has any questions about CC I am here to answer them! OMG I was there for EVERYTHING AOS!! I have a 13 min vid to prove it at their last signing... yes I am obsessive but sentimental!! I never knew what was gonna kill me/ be heartbreaking so I just kept filming😅 I have images of them from the panel and signing (I WAS SO CLOSE TO GETTING TO MEET THEM BUT ALL THE PEOPLE IN FRONT HOGGED SO I LEFT WITH ONLY PICS) so if anyone wants to see I can show :)!

(Not the best quality, sorry, but I got them both smiling so woooo!!)

Anyway, I’m sure a lot of you already put these things together or have already known this from the beinning cause we are all so smart! but just thought I’d put it all in a nice post for us to store the info on! ;) Thanks for reading and lets watch the rest of our series with the brightest smiles on our faces! Cause thats all the characters, cast, and crew really want from us as it ends with a bang!!!

#agents of shield #aos #fitzsimmons #leopold fitz #jemma simmons

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rkariel · 5 years

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MNET MGA S5 ( EP. 6 ) PREPARATION ✦ 7월 26일 , MEET THE TEAM !!

she never would’ve thought she’d be here again, in this position, in this situation ( because it destroyed a piece of her before, or it felt like it did anyway — to see her team dwindle down one by one, to see one leave to another team, one more likely to be successful for her in a way ariel couldn’t provide on her own, to see the dreams of someone slip away like that because of one word: elimination ). haseul doesn’t seem particularly enthusiastic either but she doesn’t think they should let it show. no, she thinks as coaches, they need to be as supportive as possible. as sunbaes, they have to reflect the good parts, the upside, the goal of all this hard work.

it’s perfect and chaotic timing that they’re doing promotions, because they’re there ready for the stage but not quite there yet, in the waiting period, small clips in her hair and everything to keep each strand perfectly in place. heading back and forth was worth it though, for the sake of meeting them, for the sake of being able to encourage and possibly help. the lack of time makes her sad and she wishes she could provide more, even with an offer from her sister, ariel doesn’t think it’s quite the same anymore when she isn’t the one personally involved.

admittedly, seeing them in front of her makes her a bit nervous and it seems contradictory — that one of the coaches would be nervous but she thinks it’s merited given the results team kt kept getting in season 3, especially the team she was in charge of.

she sees yuri and thinks of how nice it is that her and xuxi are on the same team again after such a good performance the week before, a performance she’s glad to have seen in person; she thinks of how yuri has such potential to be a power vocal and, in some ways, the song choices, the strength, the potential reminds her of another mga coach this season, her own best friend, mijoo. because of that, she worries, worries that maybe yuri would do better on the royal team or would prefer the royal team. compared to some of the vocals that come onto the show, she wonders why she was chosen again.

when baek jiyoung spoke of how each coach had been on the mgas before, she blanched for a moment — she’s certain she’s the only coach that wasn’t a contestant before so what does she really have to offer them in the end? but, still, she does think that, in the end, she at the very least has pretty words, such as yuri’s voice is destined for musicals one day, that if sihyeon becomes a skilled dancer, she’d be unstoppable, that nakyung reminds her of eclipse’s very own maknae — don’t underestimate her just because of her age and her skillset; there’s so much more to be revealed — that yukhei not only has the looks kt is known to scout for but the versatility, and that kyulkyung could probably dance circles around her that ariel would gladly enjoy.

“ i think i can speak for all of us when i say we’re glad you’re here! i wanted to start with this: i know they told you last night that one or all of us voted for you and i hope that doesn’t stay on your mind and, personally, i will not say whether or not i chose any of you. ” truthfully, she’s very happy with the team and it’s pretty damn close to her list, certainly close to her top 10 if she’d been given that choice instead of 5. “ because i think the five of you make a beautiful team. no matter what song you choose, the three of us are here to offer advice and cheer you on, whether we’re physically here or not. haseul and i are still promoting with eclipse right now — oh, sorry. i didn’t properly introduce myself. ”

she laughs at herself for thinking of saying the other part first instead of greeting them more . . . formally? for lack of a better word, anyway. when she’d been a coach the first time, she started with an introduction but, then again, maybe her mind is still reeling from katie lee calling her and haseul dearest. maybe it’s because she felt bad that they were told that at all — that maybe they’d worry about it or feel bad, or even think it’s not as much as a compliment as being chosen by a ceo to join the company’s team. ariel understands how that type of doubt feels, how doubt itself, in any form, holds a person back more than it should ever have the power to.

“ i’m kim minji, leader of eclipse, a recently debuted group under kt with a day and night concept. right now, we’re promoting our day concept with me gustas tu if you’ve heard it! please feel free to ask questions anytime because, if i’m right, you’ll be practicing all the time, right? ” to be honest, she doesn’t allow anything less if she had the option but she knows she won’t be able to stick around as much as she did during season three. “ there’s a reason you’re here, a reason you’re in the competition, and i hope it has a lot to do with why i’m part of kt: that you have heart and that this is your dream to have a chance to be where haseul and i are now: idols. rookie idols but idols nonetheless. i sincerely hope that if this is your dream, that you act like it. just as important, i want everyone to take care of your health. there’s a reason the day starts at kt with breakfast. because you’ll need the energy to give it your all. eat well, drink lots of water, and please smile because it’s so much healthier for you than frowning. sorry to take up so much time so haseul? luda? please take over before i talk their ears off. ”

MNET MGA S5 ✦ COACH HEADCANONS

went to visit the team during the waiting period on the 26th

offered her phone number / kkt / snap to any and all members of the team who wanted it

also offered to share her notes on their performances so far ( at least what’s been aired ) — because of mnet’s notorious reputation for evil editing, she doesn’t have any comments on what’s been aired from practice rooms or interviews

is secretly anxious about being a coach again despite the significant difference in the level of involvement; she’s actually a little sad that the timing does coincide so much with other events such as promotions and the upcoming vlive / first episode of game development girls airing; they’ll also be leaving for ktworld the day after the filming / the day before the episode airs so she worries about the final round if coaches will still be interacting with contestants

sends messages + snaps to the contestants she’s in contact with, asks for videos of their practice so she can make suggestions and encourage them ( click click click for example gifs !! ♡ , ♡ , ♡ )

more tba bc it’s 1:32am and my energy is slowly fading . . .. . . .

#rkmga5 #rkmga5groups #rkkyul #rkyuri #rknak #rksihyeon #rkxuxi #haseulrk #rkxluda #eclipse:july2019 #✧ *.･ﾟ☽ the stars align ; 0719 #✧ *.･ﾟ☽ moonlight ; me gustas tu #eclipse:july19

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more--than--music · 5 years

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2018 Albums of the Year

Here’s my albums of the year. 2018 has been a brilliant year for music, and so I thought I’d lay out my favourite albums, and the reasons why they’re my favourites.

10: Unknown Mortal Orchestra – Sex and Food

Kicking the list off at ten, we have the fourth full-length project from the New Zealand lo-fi psychedelic group Unknown Mortal Orchestra. An album that calls to mind at various points dusty late 70s grooves, 80s synth work and yet very modern production sensibilities, Sex and Food bounces between deeply introspective balladry, and funky danceable beats. A sure step forward for a band that only looks to become more experimental as time goes on.

9: Ben Howard – Noonday Dream

The Devon based singer-songwriter gives a compelling vision of the future of indie-folk with this transient and supremely accomplished set of songs. Taking a further stride away from the straightforward acoustic sound of 2011’s Every Kingdom, Noonday Dream shows an artist unafraid to utilise aspects of electronic and ambient music into his soundscapes, resulting in a transcendent, elegant, and above all beautiful set of tracks. The opening duo of Nica Libres At Dusk and Towing The Line are a particular high point.

8: Thom Yorke – Suspiria (Music for the Luca Guadagnino Film)

Surprisingly his first ever venture into soundtrack work, Thom Yorke’s masterful score for the Luca Guadagnino film of the same name could be in this list simply on the strength of its lead track; Suspirium is an otherworldly waltz, a spartan piano line presided over by Thom’s instantly recognisable vocals. But it is the deeper cuts for which this album earns its place; Open Again begins with a fingerpicked guitar progression that grows into a monolithic walk to the gallows and then fades out once more. A master at the height of his powers.

7: Sports Team – Winter Nets

Undoubtedly the least well-known name on this list, the debut EP from the London-based indie-pop outfit Sports Team has been one of my most played records yet this year. A cerebral mix of Jarvis Cocker-style lyricism preoccupied with the minutiae of suburban life, and pitch perfect indie rock arrangements teetering on the edge of chaos, this shows talent beyond their years; the only EP on this list, these five tracks managed to catch my attention early on, and have stayed with me through the year. Ones to watch.

6: MGMT – Little Dark Age

A name I would not have expected to see on this list at the start of the year, the comeback from the early 2000s electro-pop group is unexpectedly brilliant. Far from the runaway chart success of singles such as Electric Feel, Little Dark Age is full of tracks that could have been pulled from the dusty archives of pretty much any 80s synth bands, but combined with so many left-field production choices, and lyrics that belie a dark sensibility beneath the bright instrumentation, this album becomes a very mature release indeed. The single, Little Dark Age, is just magic. I can’t wait to see what comes next.

5: Car Seat Headrest – Twin Fantasy

Bringing us into the second half of this list is Will Toledo’s project Car Seat Headrest, with a rerecorded, remastered version of his 2011 breakout album Twin Fantasy. Toledo’s DIY ethos calls to mind contemporary Kevin Parker, of Tame Impala, although the two go about their self-imposed individualism rather differently. Toledo’s recordings retain the lo-fi teen emotion of the original Twin Fantasy, while adding the production sensibilities of Toledo’s later Car Seat Headrest ventures, resulting in such a dizzying barrage of pitch perfect indie ballads that display mature, incisive and insightful lyricism. The peaks of the album slip off the rails in the most glorious way, and culminate in simple, honest, and resounding emotional resolutions. Few albums so perfectly capture the teenage experience... a brilliant achievement.

4: Father John Misty – God’s Favorite Customer

It will come to no surprise to those of you who know me that Josh Tillman has made his way into this list; I have been following Father John Misty since last year’s existential crisis of an album, Pure Comedy. But God’s Favorite Customer is an entirely different beast- aside from the single, Mr Tillman, the typical luscious arrangements of a usual Father John Misty album are conspicuously missing here. Gone are the chamber pop orchestras and parlour ballads; here is FJM with an acoustic guitar, a month’s stay in a hotel room, and some utterly shattering songwriting. Tillman has abandoned his lofty perch overseeing the human condition in favour of personal, painful lyrics that dissect a failing relationship in real time. Many of these songs are addressed to, or from the perspective of, Josh’s wife, Emma, and the narratives are as autobiographical as ever. But the key here is that Tillman has ceased to be just an observer of the phenomena he comments on; in God’s Favorite Customer he has no choice but to experience them from the inside, and it makes for devastating listening in places. However, Misty has not abandoned all hope; closer We're Only People (And There's Not Much Anyone Can Do About That) ends the album with a remarkably beautiful and optimistic look at humanity, and leaves you ready to emerge from the hotel room, blinking against the sunlight, into the outside world.

3: Blood Orange – Negro Swan

London born producer, multi-instrumentalist, and general prodigy Devont Hynes, has outdone himself on his fourth project under the moniker Blood Orange; Negro Swan represents exactly the kind of progressive song writing Hynes is so sought after in the pop world for, and brings together a beautiful collage of sounds and textures to produce an album that is so of the moment, it feels like a time capsule of today. Swan embraces diversity, revelling in a celebration of sexuality and identity that feels almost carnival-like in its embrace of so many aspects of modern R&B and Hip-Hop. On what other album can you find Puff Daddy monologuing about his own fear of being loved? This whole project is filled with moments such as this, with trans black activist Janet Mock providing a loose narrative thread tying the album together. But for me, the true highlight of this album is Hynes himself; a young black artist showcasing a striking talent that simply refuses to obey the laws of genre or society. The musical prowess on show is undeniable; in particular, Hynes’ guitar work is so accomplished, tracks such as Charcoal Baby are sheer joy to listen to because of it. The vocals on this record are equally impressive; comparisons will undoubtedly be drawn to Prince, although personally I see Hynes as akin to Frank Ocean, both showcasing a new vision for R&B in the 21st century, and Swan feels in many ways a sibling to Ocean’s 2016 album Blonde, in its transient nature and almost soundscape-like mixture of sounds and feelings. Negro Swan is a glorious celebration in which all expression is embraced, and no identity is off-limits. This is what all modern R&B should aspire to.

2: Arctic Monkeys – Tranquility Base Hotel & Casino

Those monkeys, eh? Four years after their last studio effort, with each member having done something entirely different (and accomplished, see Alex Turner with The Last Shadow Puppets, and Matt Helders on the latest Iggy Pop record) with their sabbatical, no one quite knew what shape their return would take. Recorded in London, Paris and Los Angeles, the sixth album from the band synonymous with early 00s indie could have taken quite a number of directions; furthering the slick arena rock of AM, delving deeper into the baroque pop offering the Last Shadow Puppets pursue, or perhaps even a return to their raucous indie rock roots. Naturally, they did none of the above. The first sign of their step in a different direction was a video they posted in mid-April, announcing a return with an eerie synth line and a fuzzy guitar lick; in hindsight it was the perfect segue into the TBH&C era, both a nod to the leather-clad rock of AM, and yet the space-age synths and fictional space resorts of Tranquility Base. And when the album did come? Oh boy. I’m not sure a release in 2018 divided fans quite like the Monkeys’ did. I’ve heard it variously described as “sheer genius”, “derivative retro nothing” and “f*cking lift music”. It really was that polarising. I’m sure that from its spot on this list you can guess which camp I fall into. From the go, the surreal lyricism of Alex Turner is front and centre, and the record is all the better for it. From surreal references to Kubrick film techniques, and obsession with sci-fi jargon, to ridiculous pastiches of Hollywood clichés, critics weren’t short of liner notes to unpick. But the key for me was the way that the album, as all great sci-fi does, comments on modern life through the lens of futurism, while also keeping you scratching your head the whole time. Furthermore, the actual songwriting is as good as ever, with Turner making a tune about a less than perfect review for a taquiera on the moon into the rhythmic centrepiece of the album. I do have to confess, I am slightly biased; I’m a lifelong AM fan, and I did see this performed live, which only deepened my admiration of it but truthfully- listen to this album. Then listen some more. And then some more again. Because when it clicks, you won’t experience anything else even remotely like it all year.

Bonus Round

These are albums that I discovered in 2018, but weren’t released this year… they deserved recognition along with the rest of these projects.

5: Frank Ocean – Endless

Frank Ocean is one of, if not the, best and most innovative artists working in modern R&B. That much is undisputed. But until 2018, despite being a huge Frank Ocean fan, I had neglected his 2016 visual album, Endless. Perhaps this was due to laziness, not having Apple Music, or perhaps it was because for me it was vastly overshadowed by the release of the seminal Blonde a few days later. Or maybe I simply thought a visual album wasn’t worth my time. Whatever the reason, I was a fool to overlook it. Endless is an ethereal journey through Ocean’s psyche, with a vast soundscape of beautiful, flowing synths and guitars. Furthermore, Endless features some of Ocean’s best rap work since Channel Orange. A truly beautiful project, and Higgs is, for me, Ocean’s most devastatingly sad track… further evidence that Frank doesn’t put a foot wrong.

4: Leonard Cohen: Songs Of Leonard Cohen

In 2016, the music world lost one of its most treasured talents, in the form of Leonard Cohen. However, although I have always been aware of Cohen’s work (Hallelujah, his inspiration of Nick Cave, The Last Shadow Puppets’ Is This What You Wanted cover), I had never taken the time to sit down and immerse myself in his work. Well, I was very much missing out. His cinematic, confessional storytelling, and his instantly recognisable voice and manner, mean that his songs are almost exactly the type of ballads I love, and Songs is his finest work. From start to end, you see the world through Cohen’s eyes. A poet.

3: King Krule: The OOZ

King Krule (real name: Archy Marshall) is a divisive artist; many see him as a visionary, however he is also, to many (including my dad) just “the one with the awful voice”. To me, Krule is a fantastic lyricist and producer, with an instantly recognisable sound. From the moment you enter The OOZ, you are in Marshall’s world, a London of grimy concrete and eerie loneliness. However, there are moments of beauty among the sluggish, smog-filled music; Slush Puppy, despite descending into madness near the end, is a really quite endearingly desperate performance. Cadet Limbo also shows off Krule’s more jazzy influences, and is all the better for it. A view into the future of singer-songwriting.

2: Father John Misty: I Love You, Honeybear

Josh Tillman has already featured on this list once, and it’s no secret I think he’s one of the best artists working today. However, until this year, I had never given his 2015 romantic opus, Honeybear, a proper listen. I was turned on to Misty by his 2017 work Pure Comedy, and after an existentialist view on all of Humanity, a romance album seemed like a step back, so I didn’t give it the time it deserved. How wrong I was. Honeybear is a beautiful, tender, and being an FJM record, deeply satirical and funny, look at love, relationships, and society. It features lush, beautiful arrangements, and gorgeous melodies, all delivered with Misty’s characteristic tongue-in-cheek smirk. Not one track on the album is dead space, and there are several high points, right from the start. Favourite for me is I Went To The Store One Day, which is a simple, yet incredibly beautiful and moving ballad to close the album. Stunning stuff indeed.

1: Everything Everything – A Fever Dream

I’ve known of Everything Everything for quite a while now, but in early 2017 I was gifted tickets to see them on their A Fever Dream tour, and it absolutely blew my mind. EE have crafted brilliant electronic indie music in the past, with catchy melodies and odd, skittering rhythms. However, A Fever Dream builds on this in the best possible way, building on their electronic sound and adding an even more fiercely of-the-moment view on songwriting. One of the highlights for me was Jonathan Higgs’ vocals, which electrified the music with a fierce intellect, and sparkling melodies. An ecstatic blend of so many musical styles, which results in a fantastic album. A masterpiece for today.

Okay, finally the main event. My album of the year 2018 is…

1: IDLES – Joy as an Act of Resistance.

Here we are then. Number one spot. And again, if you know me, you know there could never really have been any other album here. I first discovered IDLES earlier in the year, riding off the success of their breakout debut album Brutalism, an unstoppable punk locomotive of an album, with guitar and bass lines that are so, well, brutal, that they break down the door and hold you at gunpoint until you sit up and pay attention. This band is the perfect voice for austerity Britain, more mature than Slaves, more relevant than Sleaford Mods, and yet they walk an incredibly fine line. It’s almost impossible to define until you hear a band that possess it, but they simply make. So. Much. Sense. Joe Talbot talks with such a fiery intensity that it’s impossible not to listen, and an eloquence that is so often missing from punk. He’s so likeable, and oddly enough for punk, easy to listen to. However, don’t mistake that for the album lacking brutal riffs. Because it has those in spades. From the opening bass rumble of Colossus, JAAAOR picks you up by the scruff off your neck, and doesn’t put you down until the last manic notes of Rottweiler fade away. This is a rock record that defies rock, a punk record that doesn’t define itself as punk, and a political statement that bases its politics on the phrase “Love yourself.” This provides an infectious alternative to the toxic masculinity of so much mainstream rock, and a uniquely vulnerable take on an incredible variety of issues. Beginning with an immediate left-footing with Colossus, the album the catches its witty and caustic stride with Never Fight A Man With A Perm, going from strength to strength the whole time. I’ve never quite identified with a track lyrically as much as I’m Scum, a rallying call for liberals everywhere: “I'll sing at fascists 'til my head comes off, I am Dennis Skinner's Molotov / I'm lefty, I'm soft, I'm minimum wage job”and erupting into the chant of “this snowflake’s an avalanche”. It goes on to postulate about not caring about the next James Bond, as “we don’t need another murderous toff”. The next track is the joyous Danny Nedelko, an ode to Talbot’s friend, and frontman of Heavy Lungs, Danny Nedelko. It’s a quite magnificent celebration of immigration and diversity, and embodies the sentiment of the album as a whole quite simply with a roar of “Unity!”. Potent stuff. The next highlight (or rather lowlight) for me is the one-two punch of June and Samaritans. June is a singularly moving ode to Talbot’s stillborn daughter, building all the time to a non-existent crescendo, and repeating the six-word mantra “Baby shoes, for sale. Never worn.” Incredibly painful, raw and poignant; you feel as if you’re witnessing a moment that you really shouldn’t be, a would-be father grieving at the bedside. It then transitions into Samaritans, an anti-toxic masculinity manifesto, furious in its denial of male stereotypes: “Man up, sit down, chin up, pipe down”, and building relentlessly to sheer ecstasy of the decree: “I kissed a boy and I liked it”. Powerful, powerful stuff. Track eight, Television, is pinned down by a juddering riff complimented by the incredibly able drumming of Jon Beavis (a very much unsung hero of the group), and a wonderful self-love mantra. Moving on, Great is an anti-Brexit track than manages to reveal the hypocrisy of nationalism without ever moving into preachy politicism, which is Talbot’s greatest strength; he can make any point sound like the simplest and most honest declaration ever. Gram Rock and Cry To Me are witty, and the least overtly political tracks of the album; but even these apparent low points aren’t by any means stale, quite the opposite. Every moment of this record fizzes with energy. Finally, Joy rounds off with the magnificent Rottweiler, a searing discrediting of the UK media, ending in the wheels coming off as the tension built throughout the 42 minutes comes to a chaotic end, with Joe yelping “Unity!”over and over. I have one final thing to say about Joy; it’s production is pristine throughout, with clarity in even its most chaotic moments. This is my record of the year, because I feel no other record held my attention so completely, and was so representative of the sentiment of this year. Pure joy.

Well then, thanks for sticking with me. 2018’s been a belter of a year for music, and I can’t wait to see what 2019 brings.

#2018 #albums of the year #unknown mortal orchestra #ben howard #thom yorke #sports team #mgmt #car seat headrest #father john misty #blood orange #arctic monkeys #idles

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anxietywontmakethewordsgo · 6 years

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This fucking episode, you guys

I wasn’t going to make a post like this for this ep originally, but...I went through the clips of this episode, and two scenes in particular wouldn’t leave my mind - the one where Gabriel pins Loki, and the one where he yells at the boys.

Also, a head up; this is probably going to turn into a long ass post, so buckle your seat belts and bring the popcorn and soda with you.

So, starting chronologically

(That’s not the gif I had in mind, but it’ll have to do)

In this particular scene, Dean (and Sam, but mostly Dean) are antagonizing Gabriel, giving him shit for not staying and helping them take Lucifer down. This is the converstion that follows;

Gabriel: “I call that art- but yes, without me, you two chuckleheads never would’ve known how to throw Lucifer back in the cage.”

Dean: “But instead of giving us a hand, you ran. And you just did it again when you ditched us in the bunker.”

Gabriel: “I have more important things to do than to join your little band of merry men.”

Dean: “What you’re doing, this, this is not important.”

And THIS is when Gabriel snaps, his anger, his frustration, his TRAUMA evident in the next few sentences (while all the Gabriel fangirls such as myself were crying hysterically);

Gabriel: “Everyday, Asmodeus tortured me. EVERY. DAY! He fed off my grace for years - he used me, he DEBASED me until I was-”

He then cuts off, looking over at Sam. We then see the “on the brink of tears jaw clenching™” that we often see in Dean (seriously, you guys. I could make an entire post about how many attributes these two share). Anyway, Gabriel continues with this;

“What I went through...you don’t forgive.”

The camera then flips to Dean, who is staring at Gabriel with what I interpret as a look of mistrust. He then goes on to say, “Everyone that had a hand in it, will die. Get me?”

This is particularly important, because Dean’s next words combat this point.

Dean: “Alright, you went through it. We get it. But killing Loki - not gonna change any of that. It’s not. In fact, it’s probably not even gonna make you feel better.”

To which Gabriel replies with “Well, agree to disagree, Dean-o.” (love that nickname XD)

Anyway, there are a couple different things I want to point out about this scene;

Dean’s comment on this little mission of his “not being important” is what sets Gabriel off. It may not be important to Dean, but the comment about him “getting it” seems like bullshit after he basically shot down Gabriel’s idea of self recovery. Sure, it may not help Gabriel in the grand scheme of things, as he well knows, but...it’s the first step to truly healing himself, and I don’t think Dean gets that, which absolutely pisses me off to no end.

As @flamerush101 has pointed out multiple times, he stops yelling and calms down somewhat WHEN HE LOOKS AT SAM. He looks concerned and slightly scared of/for Gabriel. I also think part of it was not wanting to break down in front of them, but THE SABRIEL IN THIS EP, Y’ALL.

One word Gabriel used really stuck out as odd to me. When he says “He debased me”, I had to stop and process for a minute. Now, I didn’t actually have the best idea of what the word meant at the time, but keep in mind; this is coming from the guy who says ‘superdoops’ and ‘raspberries’ in the same episode. Gabriel has NEVER really used words that are too far off the radar of basic language and slang. I was curious, so I looked up what it meant. the general idea is, “reduce something/someone in quality or value; degrade.”. you know what some of the synonyms were? degrade, demean, disgrace, shame, damage. Honestly, i can’t tell if this is the writers trying to keep it as vague as possible, or if its Gabriel trying to steer clear of the details of what happened to him. either way, I felt I had to point this out, so you can all cry with me.

Okay, moving on.

So they agree to help him if he helps them afterwards. Okay, cool.

...Except that we all know how flighty Gabriel is (excuse the pun). At this point in the ep I was almost CERTAIN he would still be extremely hesitant to stick around in the end. I thought maybe he would go his own way, have the boys call him up when they needed his grace, thus his appearance in episode 21. (My sabriel side said otherwise, but let’s stick to logic, shall we?)

So some action happens, Gabriel mocks Sleipner before stabbing him (ah, yes. There’s my favorite asshole). Dean does his usual reckless “bull in a china shop” move, taking the stick for Loki and going after him himself. You know, the usual.

Eventually, we wind up with Gabriel running into Loki, who looks like he has been waiting for just HIM to show up, based on a later comment.

anyway, here are some highlights of the convo, mostly from Loki;

“You think you’re some poor innocent victim. Gabriel, with his deadbeat daddy and his mean older brothers. Who will help me, who will save me?”

And then we have this back and forth;

“Of course - of course you would need someone to swoop in and save your pitiful ass.”

“Shut up!”

“Face it, old friend - you’re a joke. You’re failure. You live for pleasure, you stand for nothing. And in the end...that’s exactly what you’ll die for.”

“You first.”

Okay, SO. Here is what stuck out to me in this scene;

Gabriel looks alarmed when he sees Loki, and rightfully so. He doesn’t have the right stick, he is low on grace. He has no real way to fight him and win.

The desperate tone of Gabriel’s voice when he tells Loki to shut up. Keep in mind, Loki KNOWS his story, and Gabriel has always run away, always gone off to do his own thing. The thought that occurred to me here was that Loki knows how broken and weak Gabriel is. He can see it, and he takes advantage of it. Except, what Gabriel fears here is feeling even more vulnerable, especially in front of the boys. I think this scene in particular is what stopped Sam from pressing any further in the end, when Gabriel claimed he was fine. Gabriel and Dean are similar in those aspects, and he knows that it is best to let Gabriel keep the facade, to deal with it later.

It must be pretty damn painful for Gabriel to see a mirror image of himself spitting these truths out, made even worse by the fact that Loki used to be his friend. It is very reminiscent of season 3 episode 10, When Dean is facing off against his dream/demon self, and I think it ties perfectly into their similarities (I am so sorry, but C’MON, YOU GUYS. I CAN’T BE THE ONLY ONE WHO SEES THIS).

That split second before he stabs Loki and then when he turns back to look at the body. I am fairly certain that I speak for everyone when I say that I fucking LOVE how expressive Richard’s eyes are; he can depict an entire emotion without even speaking. Well, his eyes here...they are filled with sadness, regret. He did it, but he didn’t feel good about it. He knows Dean is right, has probably always known, but I think the revenge really was the first step to healing, to rediscovering who he is after all those years of dissociation.

Loki’s last comment, about standing for nothing. I think this is one of the BIGGEST reasons for why Gabriel wanted to stay and help them. He knows that the statement is spot on, knows that Loki is simply telling him the truth. This is especially clear when Loki uses the term ‘old friend’ rather than just calling him Gabriel. When Gabriel replies with “you first”, I feel it is a declaration, a promise - to stop running, to stand for something, even if it means giving them more grace, or going as far as to kill AU Michael. The surprised look on Loki’s face at this response confuses me somewhat - he knew he was antagonizing someone who basically had a blade to his heart. And yet, he actually seems SHOCKED that Gabriel stabbed him anyway. Perhaps because he could see the meaning behind those words as well? Either way, I feel that Gabriel wants to prove himself, wants his new non trickster persona to be different.

Also, I would just like to give Dick Speight a ROUND OF FUCKING APPLAUSE, for both his portrayal of two different characters in one episode, and for being the fucking DIRECTOR as well.

Bravo, good sir. The angels bow to you.

This is Chaos, signing out!

#spn season 13 #spn spoilers #richard speight jr #gabriel #samwinchester #dean winchester #theory #meta #i guess

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