#this took me a hot minute to write

[dozyrogue]

Hey I'm an old tubbling (dsmp days) that hasn't been really keeping up with the qsmp but knows some of tubbo's lore. What's all this about a revived tubbo? If you don't mind explaining of course.

Hiii anon!! As you hopefully remember tubbo does a lot of subtle lore so the only way to understand the revival is if u get some conext before that. Sorry if it gets just a little bit rambley

I will do my best to explain but for some background ever since maybe purgatory 1 qtubbo has been spiraling. Then he got sunny and genuinely tried to be good for her. And he was!! Hes a great dad to sunny but qtubbo is very mentally ill.

Then he got kidnapped for purgatory 2 and came back significantly worse. He became very passively suicidal, like he didn't outwardly say he wanted out, but from his actions you wouldn't know any better. At least from chats pov. Like he would jump off the top of tubchunk and get downed and sunny would be forced to revive him. "Accidentally" falling off the wall when hanging with phil. Going against the eye workers and just not caring how many times he died. It was pretty bad.

He started feeling like all his friends didn't really care for him and only wanted to use him for the factories he made and the supplies he had created. Then fit and pac got together and again he got significantly worse. So because the relationship that is morning crew changed even tho they claimed it wouldn't. Tubbo started actively pushing people away. Like he would purposely be suppppper fucking annoying and loud and abrasive. It was like he was testing who would stay with him even if he was being a dick. And basically no one passed really. Like even sunny would constantly go to fit or pac or bagi. Saying she doesnt know how to help her dad, he needs help, plz help him. And they would all respond in some variation of "aaahhh its just tubbo!!! Hes fine. Hes just being dramatic." Or assume its about fred.

On top of that because of tubbos mental stability. He couldn't really help Sunny's with her feelings and mental stability.

And I wanna mention all the eggs could see him rotting away and they would mention it too their parents, but they were like "well keep an eye on him" but didn't exactly do much. At least from tubbos pov

But moving on to the new island/spawn point.

For the most part he didn't really interact with morning crew at first. He was with foolish and the town of fobo and he was so fucking happy!!!! It was awesome!! Like even sunny was so excited that tubbo was happy again. Foolish and town of fobo was a new start for him and he felt appreciated. But everything changed when create was put behind a pay wall (I love atla lmao)

So foolish got to get to work on town of fobo projects but tubbo was feeling extremely useless. He couldn't participate in the only way he knew how. create.

He felt useless without a purpose, and was trying hard to get the money for create. He had his high with the beginning of town of fobo but this new create playwall would be the star of a new low. He was once again actively rotting in front of his friends especially his daughter and only she and a few eggs really noticed. His friends would laugh and giggle that hes being dramatic. He was rotting away again in real time. Faster than before really. Tubbo was lacking purpose, he was useless in his eyes and started looking for a purpose, a reason to keep living.

How did he find that you're wondering??? By getting two lives. So one day we had a bunch of the eggos with him. One being empanada and he brought up the fact she's the only egg with one life. How that sucks and if he could he would give a life up for her. Empanada of course refuses. But he keeps going and was like "oh you know what would be really cool..... Only having 2 lives and if I die I don't come back for good." *stares at chayanne*

Empanada is refusing and hes like "naaahh it would be really fun and cool tho." She even tries to get him to stop by bringing up sunny. And he stops for a millisecond and says something like "sure she wouldn't like that too much but I'll be fine" so now he's on two lives.

The thing is tubbo was not hiding this information, like he brought it up all the time. "I have to be careful I only have 2 lives" then he lost one. "I only got one life then I'm dead dead." Feb 13 he almost lost it due to radiation (he will never escape the nuke aesthetic lol) and the next day valentines day he dies.

And I have to make it very clear tubbo keeps telling everyone hes working on one life. He only has one life. Hes doing hardcore. Everyone thought he was joking. So on valentines he went out with a group consisting of sunny, fit, ramon, phil, chayanne, chunsik, and richarlyson. They wanted to compete a dungeon together and tubbo was down for it.

Tubbo ended up making a beat with richarlyson that he ended up losing. Richas killed him, qtubbo ended up dying begging for fit to help him but he died anyway. But it wasn't like last time he didn't come back. Fit basically left immediately sunny was left just standing over her dads body in shock. Chayanne also thought he was joking this whole time but unfortunately learned that he was being serious. And phil was there to just laughing saying tubbos being dramatic lol. No one took his death seriously, like they were all joking and laughing in front of his daughter saying he was having a tantrum and would be back when create is back. The only other person who understood sunny was chayanne.

People only started takeing his death kinda seriously was after creation showed up. The eggs did at least

Now creation is a robot that a ~version of~ qtubbo made to protect the eggs. More importantly protect sunny. Especially in the event that "primary protector" aka tubbo is gone. So late during the valentines stream on phils end, creation shows up confirming that qtubbo is dead dead and hes not coming back unless creation has the proper data. His purpose. The only way to get tubbo back is to bring him back with his purpose

And now I can finally talk about this weeks streams. Creation comes and we are shown the message that was left for sunny. Saying he doesn't know how he got himself into this, and how sunny shouldnt have to hear this message. How he expects any of the adults there to care for her. He knows he hasn't been a good example of self care. But he explains that he will have no idea that he left the message, he will have no idea that the message will even exist. There's only 2 people that can show u this message, and he promises that he will make sure she will never see either of their faces. He apologizes and explains that he never expected to have to take care of anyone else. Goes on to say if he had known he was going to care for someone else he would have never signed up for this kind of "scheme" or "operation." We don't exactly know what hes talking about tho.

He again emphasizes that the friends that we have will take care of her. And how he refuses to believe that they would let anything happen to her. And tells her to keep going and have fun in life because she's just a kid. Then we were cut back to creation who finds sunny saying he needs to find people to help bring him back. They end up with a group consisting of bagi, sunny, empanada, and chayanne and they work together to get what creation needs to bring back tubbo. Its old smooth stone, form a mod, thats before the rest of the islands time. The old order creation stated. And eventually find a secret room in town of fobo, that bagi decodes a book to get the data needed to bring tubbo back. Builds a contraption and creation dies but tubbo is alive again!!!

Then we have the next stream and tubbo is back,,, but he's different-

he comes out of lava and only remembers dying and he thinks he's been gone a day at best. He learns that only fit helped sunny. He doesn't want to believe, but its mostly true. But oddly enough he plans to murder people cuz how dare people not take care of her. Hes more aggressive, he keeps making threats of murder and only sunny is safe it seems. Hes massively holding grudges as well.

they woke chayanne up and hes basically jumping on him and yelling lmao. Claims chay doesnt care cuz he didn't wake up immediately and isn't happy hes back. And like chatters know chay was genually fuck up after losing tubbo. But dude is s c r e a m i n g at sleeping chay.

Chay wakes up, they go outside and end up talking, learned he was gone a week but hes very loud not understanding the vibes of 2 depressed children who missed him very much. He keeps trying to speak but the windchimes are pissing him the fuck off to the point he rips them down. Noises in general is really pissing him off, like things that normally would be really quiet like fire places and the motor boats he gets really angry cuz he claims its really loud.

Just overall being a Menace. Like Chayanne apologized for hitting him and Tubbo was like "oh it's okay it's okay I understand but I will simply take note of that and you'll never know when I'll Strike Back." So he's threatening even the eggs even If he is joking. Qtubbo never use to do that, some.of the eggs ruined his farm and it sent him into a tirade of just talking about how things build up and up and up how they turn into large cracks in the wall and eventually the wall will break. But as he's doing this he practically yelling but aggressively. Also threatened chat saying he can prove how scary he can be lmao.

And was constantly asking people who they think the worse parent of the island is. Sunny and chay were just tryna see where he is mentally. But hes like cornering chay "DONT I LOOK FINE, IM ALL GOOD, WHATS WRONG???"

In other words hes very angry???

Fit was just existing and man's dogged on him "what you think you're so much better than me with your spit shine bald head of yours" and anytime any of the group would try and talk away from him hes just "ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT ME???" "WHATS HAPPENING, IS THIS ABOUT ME"

Oh and he keeps mentioning the little time people have left.

Like I said some of the eggs ruined Sunny and Leo's farm and he starts off calmish??? But just gets angrier or aggressive is a better term?. Planning to just stand over richas's bed and stare at him. Hes giving arg kinda need to draw that ngl.

He gets mad that the lil group of fit, chay, Sunny, and ramon for fixing the farm that the other eggs destroyed. And fit is trying to like convince him that it's okay like they're just kids it's a mistake. And fit is like it isnt your house so it's okay and tubbo is like "fit I think you're undermining my feelings how is that okay." And fit is just like "oh but it's just like a little thing so it's no worries." And this is how tubbo goes on his "chips and cracks in the walls monologue" that sums up his character perfectly.

Soooo yeeeaaaahhh revived tubbo something else

#qsmp tubbo #yes I could have constricted what I said more but I feel like that be really hard considering how tubbo presents lore #for me at least #qsmp creation #tubbo #imagine ctubbo's passive suicidel idiation but way worse #tw self destructive behavior #tw sui ideation #tw death #i know theres words wrong here and i can only fix so much #took me forever to write these i just feel like theirs so much context needed #this took me a hot minute to write #it's my magnum opus #asks #i wrote all of this and still feel like i didnt really asker the question

[prince-liest]

I’m a sex-repulsed ace, and reading the latest chapter of 666 (as well as your analysis here on Tumblr) made me realize that I have been subconsciously thinking about MY OWN sexuality from an allo perspective? And that it has kinda been messing me up?? Like, ever since I learned that sexual attraction was actually a Thing and that it’s Important To People, I had been carrying around a fear of being deficient in some way and not being able to love to the same extent as allos. (1)

Even though I know logically that’s complete garbage and totally untrue, I felt left out of the loop because people seemed to care strongly about this thing I couldn’t even imagine. Whenever it looked like a relationship might happen I panicked for a reason that I couldn’t understand. But now I’m starting to realize that it’s because I was subconsciously terrified of an ‘ulterior motive’ behind the other person’s reasons for wanting to be with me. (2) That part of the reason they even cared was because of something I don’t experience. So thank you, because this realization just clicked into place while reading your work. The thing is, this way of thinking was just internalized in such a way that I didn’t even realize it was there until literally this week. And I think you’re right; one of the main reasons behind that is because I’ve always consumed media written from an allo perspective. (3) If ace/aros are shown at all, they’re depicted as “lacking” and their character development usually revolves around being “fixed” by the story. When I was ~10 years old my mom sometimes let me watch the Big Bang Theory with her (looking back, maybe not the best decision). Anyways, there was one episode deep into the series where Sheldon (who for the past nineish seasons was probably the closest thing to mainstream ace rep) has sex with his girlfriend for the first time. (4) Afterwards, he says something along the lines of “that was better than I thought it would be”, and it’s presented as a Very Good Thing and a big step in their relationship. I think a lifetime of stuff like that makes it very easy to internalize aphobia and feel like the lesser part of the relationship. Or to feel like the other partner is making a huge sacrifice to be with you. That got wayy too long, sorry. All that was just a lot of words to say that I appreciate you. Take care of yourself!(5)

The portrayal of asexuality that you see in media being almost exclusively as you described is very tedious to me because it presumes that something is inherently lacking in aro/aceness rather than that feeling of "lacking" being something that is induced by societal norms. Actually, one of the things that I find additionally alienating is that fandom spaces specifically have been getting better and better about ace characters - but got damn does fandom not jive with aromanticism. Like, a character doesn't want to fuck? That's becoming a liiiittle more fine, it's 2024, we stan consent. But not shipping someone romantically?? Not so easy, now.

I'm glad that my work has been something that resonated with you in this respect! Alastor cares a lot about his reputation as a demon but is pretty blatantly a person who could not possibly give less of a shit about being "wrong" for not being experiencing romantic or sexual attraction. The explanation Viv gave at one point for his own understanding of himself (that he thinks he's just "waiting for the right woman") actually stuck out to me a lot because it's a very "well, nothing is wrong with me for not feeling anything, it's the world that's failed to produce a suitable person" perspective.

But having that kind of confident perspective of your own rightness in the world is really not often portrayed in media, or even in fandom, which even ten years ago was still in the throes of standardizing "Oh, no! Me, gay? These feelings are so wrong!" style m/m content and is honestly not that far off from essentially that for aro/ace characters.

Anyway, all of that is to say that there's not yet much out there that doesn't frame allo/amatonormative values as the default that "even aro/ace people can (and should want to) achieve," and that it's really fun to write a fic that is unequivocally from the perspective of a character who is aroace and doesn't see it as even remotely a fault in himself. Does he have moments where he's a little confused and trying to process how things fit for him? Absolutely. But he just doesn't strike me as the kind of guy who thinks he owes romance to Vox of all people, hahaha. I've written him trying to conform to allo/amatonormativity more with Mimzy, because I think the social standards of their time could push him into it, but Vox? Absolutely not, he does not respect Vox enough for it to even enter his mind.

And then, on the other hand, writing it from an aroace perspective centers the way that romantic and sexual interest can feel like a betrayal of a good thing. With a character like Alastor, it frames romantic and sexual attraction the same alien way that we usually see aromanticism and asexuality framed as.

In the end, this is just one of a plethora of different experiences that aro/ace people can have, but it's one that I really wanted to see represented more, so I'm very happy to write it. I'm glad that you're enjoying it!

#ask #personal #Anonymous #long post #t #aroace #ace #he cares about Vox at this point! #but that's. not really the same as respecting him. #anyway this next chapter is important to me because it's very #how do I put this #“this was okay at the moment but that doesn't mean he's okay with it overall and forever” #“and it does not mean that they've 'progressed' their relationship to the point where Alastor being aroace is a 'nonissue'” #“(feat. ofc the heavy implication that it was an issue in the first place)” #ANYWAY. SOMETIMES I HAVE A HARD TIME EXPRESSING THIS IN NON-FIC WORDS #SO HOPEFULLY THE FIC AS IT CONTINUES SPEAKS FOR ME. I AM GLAD THAT IT HAS SPOKEN TO YOU SO FAR <3 THANK YOU!! #sexuality #my writing #hazbin hotel #this is a hot button topic atm and it took me a minute to write a reply #that didn't seem like it invited discourse lmfao #actually I still feel weird posting my opinion this strongly oops OH WELL

[dewedup]

28 with Phantom & Dew

I'm a mess already but I wouldn't mind it getting worse

here's a little something something (only a few months late and not the longest but still a feel trip)

Phantom could tell Dew was having a rough day from the moment he woke up; he just couldn’t seem to figure out when the problem started.

When he’d shuffled over to cuddle in the early light of day, Dew had rolled away.

If there’s one thing Phantom respects, it’s boundaries. So instead, he just placed a hand on Dew’s hip under the covers and kept his distance. But it seemed like even this tiny show of affection was getting under the fire ghoul’s skin. Dew huffed a frustrated sigh and got up to shower, he didn’t even bother to throw a cheeky wink at Phantom, finger crooked in a ‘come hither’ motion like usual. 

Phantom didn’t let it get to him; he knows how turbulent Dew’s moods can be. He rolled with the punches and went about his own morning routine, making sure to give Dew a little extra space in their shared room. 

The morning seemed to have set the tone for the rest of the day. Phantom tiptoed around Dew while the fire ghoul continued to ignore his presence. He knew the ghoul probably just needed some time, so he tried his best to stick to him like a shadow, quiet but close enough if Dew decided he needed him. 

Well, maybe he stayed too close. 

Phantom walked down the hallway back to the den, lost in thought while looking out the window and didn’t realize Dew had slowed his pace. He stumbled, his foot falling on the heel of Dew’s shoe, causing the fire ghoul to trip slightly. Dew caught himself on the wall and turned to Phantom, eyes burning with a fiery rage. Phantom’s cheeks flushed something fierce, an apology already spilling from his lips.

“Can’t you just leave me the fuck alone for five Satan-damned minutes?” Dew hissed, eyes narrowing at the younger ghoul. Phantom jumped back a few steps, raising his hands in defence at the angry tone. Tears pricked behind his eye lids as steam blew out of Dew’s nostrils. 

“I’m sorry! It was an accident,” Phantom rushed out, biting his lip to keep the tears at bay. 

“Seriously? You’ve been breathing down my neck all day. Do I have to spell it out for you?” Dew paused, as if waiting for a response, but Phantom had no idea what he was talking about. “I just need a break; you’re constantly there and sometimes I just want to do things without you. We don’t need to be attached at the hip every second of every day.”

Phantom was at a loss for words. Did he do something wrong? Why did Dew not talk to him about this before now? The confusion must have been written across his face because Dew just scoffed, his head shaking as he continued the walk back to the den alone, leaving Phantom to watch, wondering where it all went wrong. 

“Oh Bug,” Phantom whirled around, wiping furiously at the tear that had started to fall down his cheek. Rain smiled sadly at him, walking forward to wrap his arms around the downtrodden ghoul.

“I can’t believe I didn’t see this coming,” Phantom whimpered into Rain’s chest, shoulders shaking as he took deep breaths of the water ghoul’s scent in an attempt to ground himself.

“Hey, no none of that,” Rain tsked, pulling back slightly so he could hook a finger under Phantom’s chin. He waited for the younger ghoul to meet his eyes before he spoke next. “You didn’t do anything wrong. This is on Dew. He doesn’t get to treat you like that. Just because he’s having a shitty day, it doesn’t make it okay for him to take it out on you.”

Phantom nodded, willing Rain’s words to sink in and take root. 

#gloom writes #but just barely #and i'm rusty #also i haven't been in the ghoul mentality for a hot minute #but we love angst in this house #fic promp #thanks for sending this ash #sorry it took me seven years to get around to it #angst #phantom ghoul #dewdrop ghoul #dewtom #the band ghost ficlet

[queencaramilflinda]

I listened to the Thiala fight while watching Frozen 2: a research study

Idea curtesy of Alli @operationslipperypuppet

Spoilers for Frozen 2 and the Bahumia finale beneath the cut!

I am more than aware no one asked me to do this. But I have nothing better to do with my time, so, to quote the wise words of a gameshow host: without further ado let’s begin.

Research Question and Methods:

I’m not a science person by any means, but I feel it best to approach this in an academic manor. My research question was “How well do Frozen 2 and the Thiala fight line up?” and my methods for finding this answer was to play them both at the same time. I started the podcast at the time stamp 58:48, (thank you Alli for providing that) which is when Murph calls for the rolling of initiative, and I skipped past the opening credits of Frozen 2, pressing play on the movie on the 47 second mark.

My findings:

Here is a brief list describing the moments that lined up best between Frozen 2 and the Thiala fight.

Hardwon deals 297 points of damage while in Frozen 2 the land of the Northuldra is covered in a fog that traps everyone inside.

Galad shows up at the same time that the title for Frozen 2 appears on screen.

There is a comment made about how Galad needs to blow his nose, and simultaneously Anna touches Olafs nose on screen.

The Old Cobb flashback is very stressful but makes for a much better listening experience than what the movie wants you to be listening to at this time, which is Olafs “When I’m Older”song. Old Cobb is being hurt while Olaf is being… not hurt per se but put in situations for sure

The Galad attack that drops Hardwon in the same way Galad killed his father happens at the same time as Olaf talks about Elsa and Anna’s parents dying

Galad dies before Olaf, during the lost in the woods song in Frozen 2

Murph explains how Thiala lost humanity and gained control of full god powers as Elsa tames the water ice horse

I was hoping Thiala second form would happen with Elsa’s outfit change but unfortunately that’s not what happened

Spirit shroud happens as Olaf dies

There is a swing and a crit on Hardwon as the dam in Frozen 2 breaks

Erlin comes back at the same time as Elsa

Conclusion:

How well do Frozen 2 and the Thiala fight line up? Well… not great. This may be due in part to the way I synchronized the pieces, I wonder if I should have watched the opening credits of Frozen 2 instead of skipping them, or instead of starting from the call for initiative worked backwards from the time stamp the Thiala fight ends so I could make sure the two pieces of media were exactly the same length. As it stands Frozen 2 is about 10-15 minutes shorter than the Thiala fight, depending on whether or not you count the credits of Frozen 2.

I had a very fun time doing this experiment though! I genuinely love both Frozen 2 and NADDPod so this was great. If anyone wants to run this same study and see if they get the same results, or change the method a bit to see if it lines up better please do so and let me know how it goes!

#this took me a hot minute to write up but I’ve finally done it! #I don’t know why I did it but I did it #cienna talks #naddpod #bahumia #frozen 2 #Olaf dies in frozen 2 #naddpod c1 #thiala

[purplecatghostposts]

Maybe some hurt comfort with Jay and Tim? (romantic or platonic, both are good :3)

Possibly sickfic? Or comfort from nightmares? Those are my personal favourites, but honestly, whatever you wanna write I'll eat right up lol, just a big hurt comfort fan lol

(your writing is amazing btw!!)

Oooo, I have not written a lot of Jam and that is a CRIME. These bitches gay, here’s my mini sick fic essay on it.

Content Warnings and Tags: Sickness, Flu, Hurt/Comfort, Honestly could be seen as either but I think they’re gay, Minor Angst With A Happy Ending, Implied/Referenced Self Esteem Issues

Word Count: 900 words

— —

Admittedly it takes Tim a little while to realize he’s sick. Coughing isn’t unusual for him, even before he started smoking, so he doesn’t think much of it when that starts up.

It’s not until he realizes his nose is so stuffed up that he can’t breathe through it and that every joint he has is aching that Tim processes the fact that he’s actually sick. A cold— or a mild flu? It’s one of the two. Nothing major but enough to make him a little more miserable than usual.

But it’s not his first rodeo. Tim does what he always does and buys the strongest sleepy cold medicine that doesn’t mess with his medicine that he can gets his hands on, takes some, and promptly passes out. Jay does ask a few questions but Tim waves him off and tells him he’ll be fine in the morning, because he always is.

Except he wakes up and he really doesn’t feel better. If anything, he feels worse— he’s sweating and kicking the blankets off doesn’t do anything to help. Blindly, he fumbles for more cold medicine but ends up accidentally batting it off the nightstand instead. A groan escapes him— just his luck.

A shadow looms over him. Tim looks over and sees Jay there, eyebrows knitting together.

“No offense but you kinda look terrible.”

Tim huffs, rubbing his face in an attempt to get rid of some of the sweat. “I feel terrible.” He admits, half mumbling. “Usually that works.”

“Well, what do you need?” Tim thinks for a second, then motions to the cold medicine on the floor. Jay gives him a look. “I… Don’t think that’s a good idea. You should probably like, eat and drink first? Hold on.”

Jay leaves and returns with a water bottle in hand, pushing it towards Tim. He fumbles to open it but Jay stops him before he can. “Hold on— sit up first.”

Tim groans again but shifts until he’s sitting up against the bed frame. Only then does Jay hand the bottle back, cap now unscrewed, and Tim takes a few sips before realizing how thirsty he is and sucks down the rest in no time. Jay’s eyes go wide.

“Guess you needed it.”

“Guess I did.” Tim admits. “I don’t think I can keep down anything we have though so maybe I should just stick with water.”

“I was thinking of buying soup. Any kind you like?”

“You— you don’t need to do that, Jay. I’m fine, it’ll pass. Don’t waste your money.”

Jay gives him an odd look. “‘Waste my money’?” He repeats, eyebrows scrunching together. “Buying you some soup when you’re sick isn’t wasting money, Tim. Just— what soup? I’m defaulting to chicken noodle otherwise.”

Tim hesitates but Jay doesn’t seem to be backing down. He sighs. “I like tomato soup. It’s good with toast.”

“I’ll grab some bread too then.”

“Jay.”

“Stop acting like I’m pulling teeth, Tim.” Jay huffs, shaking his head. “It’s just soup. It’s not a big deal.”

Tim’s mouth opens before it closes again. Jay’s eyebrows furrow. “What?”

“I just.” Tim struggles for the right words. “It’s been a while.” He settles on.

“Been a while since what?”

“Since… Anyone took care of me while I was sick.”

“…Oh.” Jay says after a beat. “That… Oh.”

There’s a long silence between them. Then abruptly, Jay grabs his keys and his wallet and points at Tim.

“Twenty minutes.” He says. “Don’t move. Unless you need to go to the bathroom or something.”

Then he’s out the door, moving like he’s on an actual time limit.

—

“What,” Tim says slowly, staring at the bag Jay just dumped on the bed, “The fuck.”

“So I got a few other things besides soup and bread.” Jay tells him, as if it wasn’t already obvious enough. “This cold pack is amazing, trust me, I used to have one just like it. It’s reusable so it’s an investment really. I got some orange juice because— honestly I forget what it’s good for but my mom always made me drink it when I was sick so it’s probably good for something. The Tylenol is good for fevers, saltines are always a good snack and especially with soup, and the chocolate… That’s just for fun honestly. You could probably use a treat.”

“Jay…” Tim doesn’t know what to say. The best he manages is, “Why?”

“Well— you said nobody had taken care of you while you were sick in a while so I figured you might need like, the full experience.” Jay rubs the back of his neck, almost sheepish. “It’s kinda been a while since I took care of anyone though so uh, I don’t really know what I’m doing so we can just figure it out together. I was thinking we could watch TV while you ate or something? Good of a start as— oh shit, are you crying?”

Tim rapidly blinks, wiping his face. “Maybe.” He chokes. “Fuck, Jay. Thank you.”

“It’s really not a big deal.” Jay insists.

“It kinda is to me though.” Tim laughs, swallowing thickly as he meets his gaze. “Seriously. Thank you.”

Jay smiles at him. “Of course.” He says, and Tim feels his heart flutter.

He doesn’t usually have people taking care of him like this, but he thinks it would be nice to get used to it.

— —

Anddd that’s my short lil sick fic. I feel like Tim needs to be pampered a little. He deserves it. Jay is gonna give that to him.

Thank you for the request, feel free to send another, and I hope you liked it!!

#marble hornets #marble hornets fanfiction #jay merrick #tim wright #mh jam #sick fic #SB Speaks #SB Writes #funny little sick fic is HERE #sorry it took a hot minute #I’ve been distracted #but! hope you like!! #these bitches are gay TO ME

[xxwithlovefromfaexx]

@stnaf-vn​ this is part one of my submission for the STNAF: Fanfic contest! I haven’t been writing as regularly as I’d like, so it’s been nice to get into some writing.

Warnings: dead dove, DO NOT EAT, touch starved/touch averse reader, unwanted filming swearing, stalking (cameras), voyeurism is hinted, just Friend ruining a good night by being creepy as hell jaskdbkfb

Notes: I do have a nsfw addition to this, which was what I was originally going to post. But since I’m uncomfortable posting it on tumblr, if you want to read the prt. 2 please message me first! That way I can check your bio before sending the google docs file :)

It had been a while since you indulged yourself in someone else's touch. Not even in a sexual light.

To say you were touch averse, it sounded like the right term. So long without brushing your hand against another's, the days of hugging Friend at the playground were long gone. Perhaps, after your last relationship, you had sealed the deal for yourself.

Reaching out for touch became too awkward, too uncomfortable. The very hairs on the back of your head stood up and trickled an anxious dread down your spine as someone pulled you in for a hug. Even accidental brushes piqued your heartbeat as you apologized profusely, eyes darting for an exit.

And yet, you could feel yourself becoming more and more desperate for it. Ironic, how the one thing you craved more than anything was also the one thing you couldn't stand to bare. You'd cling to your only pillow at night, because it was really the only thing left that kept the pangs of emptiness away. How sad, that you had resorted to living quite like this. If Friend saw you like this...Would he?

No, no...you couldn't put any more of your burdens on Friend. He already does so much for you. It was almost uncomfortable, the lengths he'd go to just to make sure you were happy. If you asked him to hug, to cuddle you...he wouldn't say no, would he? But...you weren't sure you were quite ready for it just yet.

That's why you were here today, with Friend, in the plushie aisle. He seemed upset that you'd buy a plushie rather than let him make one for you, but...walking into a store and buying a life-sized pillow is making your cheeks flush and your head hurt enough. He just had to insist on coming today, the day you'd been working up to, didn't he? 

A mall trip. Just like you used to do, with you dragging a belligerent Friend with you as you watched movies and window shopped until your feet hurt.

“You know, I could make you one of these for free right?” You turned to Friend with a frown.

“I know, but...you already do so much for me. Hell, I have a tone of your plushies all stacked up in my room as is,” not to mention the way they all stared at you...it was kinda creepy, staring into their dark, looming eyes. Like looking into the other side of a camera. You wanted a normal, regular pillow. One that didn't feel like it was eating you with its eyes.

“They aren't even made of good quality material. And for this price? I can make a life sized you for cheaper,” He tutted, gently brushing your hand away from the price tag that you were eyeing up skeptically. You jumped at the contact, retracting your hand quickly as your eyes darted to his in shock before looking away quickly. He pulled his hand back sheepishly, but you couldn't help but notice the hurt that flashed in his eyes.

“Sorry, Friend,” you apologised quickly, looking away. That was uncalled for. And to Friend, of all people! You couldn't help but feel ashamed of just how disgusted you'd become-it was really only an innocent, accidental touch after all. This stuff should be the things that have you blushing over contact, not running for the hills! If you could just...feel okay about it, maybe the contact you so desperately craved wouldn't be so hard to obtain.

Of course, Friend wasn't hearing it.

“Hey, how many times have I told you, don't apologize like that. It was an accident, right? I'll try to be more careful next time,” He gave you a reassuring smile, yet...you couldn't help but remember the hurt in his eyes. Urghhh...maybe you were being stupid, trying to save him the trouble and buying it yourself. You knew you couldn't really afford it; the money you'd been saving up for this could easily be used on more food for the week, or your utilities bill...

“It's fine, Friend. I'm just, not used to that kind of stuff,” It was your turn to be sheepish. He just stood, with his hands crossed. He obviously wasn't budging on this one. Changing the subject before he could pressure you for answers, you tilted your head and rested your index finger on your chin.

“So, say you really wanted to make up for it...you said you could make one life sized plushie for your bestest friend in the whole world, right?” From your peripheral, you could see his steely resolve crack just a little, raising his eyebrow slightly.

“Yeah...?” You turned your gaze to him and gave him a sweet little smile.

“And you know I'll be forever grateful to my bestest friend in the whole wide world if you made it for me, right?” You couldn't contain your grin as the cracks went deeper, and he seemed to think it over for a while.

“Hmmm...forever grateful you say?” He pondered it. His face was sporting a joking grin for you, but his eyes, they held a red glint to them you'd barely seen before, in all the time you've known Friend. You couldn't help but feel unsettled; though you’re sure the most he's capable of is teasing you to absolute abandon at your statement and dragging you to get some of that “death by chocolate” drink he loved so much.

God, what had you gotten yourself into? You just smiled back at him, putting the groan you had on hold. Those drinks gave you a serious stomachache. But even as you are when buying coffee together, you weren't going to let him see you back down. No matter the fate you've just damned yourself to.

“Forever and always, love,” He always throws those sweet nicknames at you. Why not send them back?

That worked. A little too well, judging by the blush he was now sporting. Were those...heart eyes?

“Well, how can a guy like me deny that? I'll make sure to cash in on that gratitude, don't you worry,” You broke your facade to deadpan at the way he so merrily sing-songed that last part of his concession.

“Don't make me think I've made a mistake here, Friend” he just smiled at you and gestured to the stores exit, and you followed him out.

“Don't you worry. I'll be sure to make it something we both enjoy,” He replied with a chuckle to himself. You raised an eyebrow but didn't say anything. Your eyes had met something you couldn't tear yourself away from, no matter how hard you tried.

“Oh, I know exactly where we're going next,” He turned to look at where you were glancing and groaned.

“A haunted house, really? How great can it be if its shoved into the mall complex here?” You rolled your eyes at Friend's unimpressed stare.

“Come onn, you used to love this stuff! First one to yelp has to buy the other lunch?” He sighed but turned to the haunted house.

“Alright, alright...weren't you the one screaming for me over some stupid actor in a ghoul costume last time?” You glared at him, hurrying to catch up to his strides.

“Hey, no fair! That was genuinely scary!”

---------

When Friend came and dropped off your newest addition to the collection, you couldn't help but jump straight onto the couch, hugging it close. He said he was busy with some orders, so he could only really stay for dinner and then he'd have to go. You couldn't help it; your heart ached at the thought of him leaving so soon.

But you had fun, at least. It was nice to spend time with him, even if it was just to veg out on the couch and eat takeout pizza while you watched your favourite show. You just wish time could go a little slower. If only you could muster up the courage to ask Friend for a cuddle, or at least to feign sleepiness and doze off on his shoulder.

Alas, it was time for Friend to go. You waved him goodbye with a wry smile.

“Don't be a stranger,” You bid him. He raised an eyebrow at your comment, and you could see a cheeky grin forming at your words.

“When am I ever? You wound me,” You deadpan at him as he clutches his heart dramatically.

“Serves you right for holding my remote-control hostage,” You huffed, and he smirked.

“It's not my fault you have terrible taste in TV shows, sweetheart,” You groaned. God, how you regret ever feeling soft for this smug idiot.

“Hey, it's a good show!” He nods his head slowly.

“Uh-huh, yep. What was it called again?” Oh, that's it.

“Good night!” You slammed the door in his face. Heh. That'll show him.

You walked back to the living room, packing away the empty pizza boxes and turning the TV off. You didn't feel like watching anymore Unsettled Mysteries. As soon as you came back into the living room, it left as it something was missing.

You were alone, again.

You wish you could've told Friend to stay, if even for just a little longer. But you didn't want to bother him anymore than you already had. You looked over to the plushie, that sat in the middle of the couch. He'd been slaving over that thing for the past few days. You wondered how he even managed to get any sleep in, carefully sewing and stuffing it together in all that time. Geez, he really was a good friend.

And you'd just slammed your door straight into his face. Shit.

Sighing dramatically, you plopped down and pulled the oversized plushie into your lap. Seriously, this thing was huge. How the hell did he make it so perfect, and fluffy, and big? You pulled out your phone.

Hey, thanks for tonight. And the plushie. It's exactly what I wanted.

You sent the text, hesitantly hovering over your next words.

I hope we can hang out again soon.

No, that just sounded desperate. You only just hung out. And you've been hanging out constantly, to the point that Friend is missing his order deadlines.

Hope the customers aren't too mad with the order delays. godspeed, Friend.

You sent a cute little sticker and threw your phone to the other side of the couch, groaning as you pushed your head into the plushie. After smooshing your face into the plushie and wrapping yourself around the huge thing, you figured it'd be more comfortable in your bed. At least then you could sleep away all your problems with your newest addition to the collection.

Grabbing your phone, you walked into the bedroom and balanced the plushie and your phone in one hand to turn on the light with the other. Your phone buzzed as a message from Friend popped up. Walking to the bed, you sat down and hugged the plushie tight, opening the message.

You sound so formal, I'm not your mum lol.

That asshole-! Another message popped up, before you could take your words back.

No need to thank me, really.

You rolled your eyes. Now who's the one being formal?

You know I'll be there whenever you need me.

You dwelled over that last text, staring at the phone. Maybe you could just ask him to be on call with you while you cuddled your plushie, right? It wouldn't be that bad, and he could still get his orders done...he didn't need to know you'd be in your head, imagining him in your arms instead of another one of his cuddly creations.

The vibration of your phone jumped you out of your thoughts.

Sweet dreams, sweetheart <3

How did he know...? Ugh, never mind. You sent him a heart back, that's all he gets for such a cheesy exit line. Dropping your phone by the other side of the bed, you rolled over to your side. Your newest plushie, Friend 2.0 (you'd decided), squished even closer to your side.

You found yourself staring deep into those doll eyes. You could never tell Friend, but it had always unsettled you, the eery stare his plushies gave you as you went about your day, It felt like, like they were...watching you. It sounded stupid. So, so stupid. But the more you gazed into its eyes, the harder you looked...

The eyes were dark, black, just like any other teddy bear eyes. Only, the pupils on this one looked strikingly familiar, right in the middle. Maybe that was a trademark of Friend's creations? You'd always been too creeped out to look closely at the plushies. No, these ones looked a little different. They were reflecting you. And if you peered closely, you could see through the dark iris and in the middle, there, right where the pupil should be there was a...lens?

Was that really a lens?

No, no, it couldn't be.

You reached for your phone, frantically flipping it over to inspect the camera lens of your phone.

Then you looked to the plushies eyes, staring right back at you.

Then back to the phone.

They were almost...identical.

Fuck. Fuck, fuck fuck, no, no, no.

Your stomach fell to your feet. You felt like puking.

Or maybe, you felt like running out of the bedroom and out of your apartment and out of your town.

Maybe it was Friend's supplier? Maybe Friend simply didn't know?

But Friend made these, just for you. He'd sewn each of these eyes in with loving care. He did with all of the plushies he gave you, just like he��d remind you.

Sewing each, and every hidden camera into the plushies, your plushies, each with loving care.

#STNAF #OOOH this one took me on a ride #I looovee writing yanderes but ooh it takes a hot minute #I'm really happy with how this turned out though! #This old blog of mine was hitting the dust #literally #I haven't used it since I was like 15 yeesh #STNAF Friend #friend stnaf #stnafgame #I feel like this is kinda ooc for Friend #his cameras are fbi level hidden #only the best for his sweetheart <3 #STNAF fanfic contest

[sansloii]

Dissect your own writing style. What do you do most often? What do you want to take away from other writers (tag them if you want)? What is something you want to break out of?

when i started eons ago (2011/2012-ish), I had major issues with splicing-- where i felt the need to reply to every single thing in a response. even though it seemed like my muse was thoroughly engaged with whoever they were interacting with, it made my writing quite awkward since i would jump from one topic to another--from one focus to the next--and it didn't really flow well either. it wasn't pleasant to read and if i went back to re-read it, i found it very tedious. i would scan it, which is even worse because if i'm not properly re-reading it, why would anyone else, you know? i also struggled with many of the things most people did, which included dumping a thesaurus ( not to the point of purple prose ) into my writing and praying it would make it better.

anywho, i mention splicing first because it was the driving factor in me reshaping how i wrote and everything else either came after or changed with it.

style and structure

my current writing style is divided into three parts: Reaction, Thoughts, and Response. how these three are arranged are completely dependent on how the prior post in the thread left off but more oft than not, they are in that general order; my outlines ( when i do write them ) are in a similar order too. It has its upsides ( it makes it easier for me to direct a thread or a response to something because there's a structure ) and downsides ( if I'm not willing to compromise on structure here and there, it makes it difficult to frame my writing properly ). overall, though, it's helped me--as frustrated as i get with getting things down

reactions and thoughts tend to either take 2/3rds of a reply and a response takes up about 1/3rd. the reason why reactions and thoughts are bundled together is because, to me, they're more or less blended together by default and trying to section them out like "here's a reaction. then a thought" interrupts the flow of my writing. instead, they're layered together so it allows me to maybe going back and forth when a muse is reacting and/or thinking about what's happening in a moment. the response is, more oft than not, interacting with the other character if it wasn't included in the previous section and active dialouge. i've been guilty of having my muse say things, do things, and think things that don't push anything forward so at the end of a reply, i make sure to evaluate whether or not my muse has done anything of substance if needed.

things i've noticed i do a lot are:

repetition for emphasis ( e.g: he tried over and over and over again )

including phrases/descriptions/entire sentences that a partner used not necessarily in that thread/ask, but in another in order to make a connection between the muses a bit more apparent

splitting dialouge with an icon or with a singular line of thought

splitting dialouge with action that's not "he said, she tells, they laugh", etc. if i can

if there is a theme that is going to prevail throughout the entire response/ask, it's usually established in the first or second paragraph

i'm sure there are other things that i do but these are the few i've noticed because they're more of an active choice i make.

dialouge

something i also do that's not necessarily visible in my writing is that i repeat my dialouge to myself with the general mannerism of whichever muse is talking. so take for example, mikah and kurama ( @un1awful ). these shits do nothing but make jabs at each other if they're not actively engaged in something serious. as a result, they're very dialouge heavily. mikah's words have to be concise and sharp ontop of conveying bits and pieces of their ego because of who they're dealing with ( like here ). mikah's not threating kurama--so it can't be too aggressive or too insulting... but it also needs to convey that they want him to shut the fuck up without them outright saying "shut the fuck up", you know?

on the flip side, we have Andris, who also has ego and is also sharp.... but the way he is sharp is different. he has that "customer service" type of voice--very even and is intentional about what he says and how he says it. any bite he has tends to be a bit subtle. for example, here when he addresses seth ( @starpoacher ), he's teasing back but he's also still a little annoyed about seth barging in, hovering over his shoulder, etc., hence the use of "sir chef" instead of Seth's name. it comes and goes quickly because... it's seth and he will ultimately get over it, but that's how he tends to convey things.

it's a little awkward repeating dialouge to myself but it also helps me identify better ways to say something or to figure out if something is not quite right about a phrase my muse says. my muses also have different cadences when they speak so repeating them in that cadence does help when it comes to placing it in a reply and knowing where i can break it up, if needed.

what i want to take away from other writers + what i want to break out of

i require the ability to proofread better.

i don't think i'm the only one that thinks faster than i type and so, i forget words/sentences/etc. and don't catch it until i circle back for a second read... after i've posted it. it doesn't happen a lot but when it does i cringe so fucking hard.

i also have a bad habit of writing too much and not being willing to cut things out even if i don't like it, which stems from the mentality that "longer is better" and it's not. longer without substance is not better. longer with tedious language is not better. longer to the point of... not quite knowing what the point of the reply was is not better.

i've curbed a little bit of that through reading the threads and asks answered by others ( @un1awful, @rexpyre, @nezumivc103221, @bloodxhound, @royaletiquette to name a few ) and it's less to take from them and more to just... see how they write, i guess? and not necessarily things that i'm involved in but thing threads or asks i catch that are interesting to me. it helps to take a step back and not think so much about how i write things for a little bit and just... read something else--something that i have nothing to do with. in a way, it helps me be a little more objective with my own writing.

as much as i like my style and the way i write, seeing it over and over again makes me crave variety. i want to see how other people describe things or get from A to B. to that point, varying sentence structure is another thing at the back of my mind that.... i have a love-hate relationship with. on one hand, i can write something and be perfectly fine with it. on the other, i look at it and wonder why i have multiple long sentences like "[action/thought] and [action/thought]" right next to each other. it's that or a bunch of short sentences bundled together. sometimes, it's even a long and short sentence but they don't flow well like that... so they both need to change. i get though it somehow but not without some difficultly

Unprompted | @eternasci

#eternasci #🗪 ┊ ⧼ you all are some chatty cathys! ⧽ ⇹ ( asks. ) #ツ ┊ ⧼ catwalk talk ⧽ ⇹ ( ooc. ) #.i believed i answered everything #.and anything i didn't? yes i did #.thank you for the ask :) because woo-wee it's been a hot minute since i've analyzed my own writing #.and it took me a hot minute to reread things and pick them out

[empresskadia]

Okay, but the hottest thing in all of Halo was Buck, seeing one of men wounded and cornered by one of the most revered classes of Jiralhanae, immediately and without hesitation jumps on its shoulders and goes for CQC.

Imagine saving Blue Team or Naomi with that trick?

I seriously went back to play Halo ODST so I could get this scene also thank you for including Naomi, 'cause the brainrot is real.

Naomi is stressed when she sees you jump onto the Jiralhanae, her instincts scream at her to intervene, but before she can even process her next move, you are already grappling with the foe in a deadly dance of close-quarters combat.

Naomi's hands clenched into fists as she watched, her mind torn between fear for your safety and admiration for your bravery. She knew she needed to help, and with a swift, calculated strike, she landed a solid blow to the Jiralhanae's jaw, staggering it momentarily.

With a swift motion, you plunged a combat knife into the creature's neck delivering that final hit. So, it turns into a team effort to finish the Jiralhanae off. Despite the searing pain of her own bleeding wounds, her primary concern was for your well-being and she swings her helmet in your direction, asking if you're alright or hurt.

With Blue Team, John's not prepared to see you jump onto the Jiralhanae's back and it takes him a second to react as you engage in CQC with it. While it's distracted, John ends up copying your move and stabbing his knife into its neck before you kick the creature off the side of the building.

She might not admit this to your face, but Kelly has a small fangirl moment. If you didn't have her respect before, you do now. Girl's already shrugging off her wound and jumping back into the fight when you engage in CQC, Kelly wasn't going to let you have all the fun.

Fred's kinda of surprised and it takes him a moment to register the scene of the Jiralhanae trying to wrestle you off its back. His knives already arching across the air and sinking into its shoulder by the time you jump off, you end up taking the same knife and shoving it into the Jiralhanae's throat while it turns its attention back to Fred.

Linda hardly reacts but she's impressed, not anyone would jump in to help a Spartan, much less jump onto a Jiralhanae to redirect its attention. Before you even start CQC, Linda has already taken her shot and the Jiralhanae falls off the building side.

#Naomi got alittle bit more cause there is hardly any content for her #halo #halo series #my writing #master chief #john 117 #kelly 087 #linda 058 #fred 104 #naomi 010 #ask #asks #I'm sorry it took me a hot minute to answer

[anipgarden]

The Biodiversity Saga - Parting Words and Sources

This is my final post in a series I’ll be making on how to increase biodiversity on a budget! I’m not an expert--just an enthusiast--but I hope something you find here helps! 

Finally, at long last, it’s almost time for me to shut the fuck up. But before I go, I just wanted to say a few things!

First things first, every little bit you do counts! And I genuinely mean that. Even if you can only do a handful of these things, or even just one, that’s better than doing nothing. I know it can feel like it doesn’t matter in the long run, that you’re not having an impact--especially when you’re first starting. 

But the ecosystem wants to work with you to grow back and be biodiverse. Even just doing some of these actions will help the ecosystem gain resilience and build itself back. Once you get the process of increasing biodiversity started, it can and will build on itself after a while in a positive feedback loop. Something as simple as mulching or composting will bring decomposing bugs, which bring pest-hunting bugs and birds. The birds will bring seeds in their poop, which then drops more native plants into the mix. As those plants grow, they’ll attract more diverse insects to the area, which’ll then attract reptiles and amphibians to eat the insects. The cycle you start will continue. You can certainly do more actions to speed things along, but they’ll happen nonetheless.

So no matter how big or how small. Whether you can spare a few potted plants on a balcony or patio space, or are collecting seeds to turn your backyard into a wildflower meadow. Whether you’ve got a birdfeeder, or a birdhouse, or even just some tomatoes and beans and sunflowers. Whether all of this is feasible for you, bit by bit, or if all you can do is know how to help and talk to people about it. I see you. And I appreciate the work you’re doing to improve our world for the wildlife we share it with.

And I’m sure the wildlife appreciate it too. Even if you don’t see it directly.

With that being said, in a reblog I’ll be linking additional sources, if you want to do some additional reading. Whether you use these links to do further research, to help decide what route you want to take on your next project, to win an argument/support your arguments, or to 'well, actually' me in the comments, I hope they're of help to you!

#ani rambles #out of queue #the biodiversity saga #END SCENE #ALRIGHT IM GONNA POST THESE LINKS IN A REBLOG EVERYONE KEEP YOUR EYE ON THE REBLOGS #IN OTHER NEWS #GOODNIGHT EVERYONE BYE IT TOOK ME LIKE 4 MONTHS TO POST ALL THE PARTS SO IM NEVER DOING THIS AGAIN #(I will likely do something like this again) #like legit this entire series was prompted by me getting annoyed at the defeatist replies on a systiln post #the things i can and will do out of spite are immense and immeasureable #with that being said the writing brain is lowkey tapped tf out and the research brain currently won't even read a long tumblr post so like #don't expect much outta me for a hot minute. unless i feel the Spite.

[bearbonespdf]

so i have this, ig now ex, friend who is also my ex boyfriend. right now im kinda coming to terms with the fact that he was? is? abusive. we've known each other for about 4 years now, dated for 2 of those, and broke up about 9 months ago. we've gone through a lot together, including a major traumatic event that involved him being called an abusive boyfriend. this has added to my... hesitance to call him an abuser.

he has hit me a couple times, which we talked through and he didnt do again. however he would bite me pretty often and pretty hard, and wouldnt let go when i asked him too. i used to beg him to stop but he'd (paraphrased) call me dramatic and to get over it. he'd also insult my appearance, personality, and intelligence pretty often. he would yell at me for things i couldnt change (ex: forgetfulness from adhd) and when i tried to explain that he'd tell me i was just making excuses. he would also compare me to our shitty ex friends whenever i did or said smth he didnt like. i had to change the way i spelled the word "ok" (i used to spell it "okay") because he would get mad at me for not being considerate of how he thought "okay" was disingenuous.

but despite all of that, he wasn't horrible to me all the time. we were best friends for a long time. i also contributed to our arguments, and he's said that i traumatized him too. i have friends who tell me that he's definitely abusive and that none if its my fault. i want to believe them but it just kinda feels like wishful thinking? he always told me that i have a tendency to avoid responsibility for my actions, and idk if thats what im doing? i have some other friends who are still cool with him despite knowing all of what i detailed above (and some more lol) and say that they understand why he's upset and why he did what he did. i think the friends who are on his side (which i hate saying, i dont really think its a "sides" situation?) are trying to explain his side of the story and feelings in the matter to the people on my "side".

anyways, this whole post is sparked by the fact that i just found out he blocked me. idk for how long, but i blocked him back. im scared, im stressed, i feel guilty but also kinda glad? i was planning out how to break off our friendship already, but i wanted to end it more amicably. i didnt want to block eachother, i was hoping to stay acquainted at best and maybe leave room for friendship again further down the line. when we both were changed and healed. im writing all this down to avoid a panic attack, but id also appreciate any thoughts and/or opinions anyone has on the matter?

#it took me 30 minutes to write this post and i felt nauseous the entire time lmfao #bear growls #irl shit #tw abuse #vent post #friendship advice #mental health #romantic advice #i guess? #lmao why cant shit just be normal and uncomplicated #im too funny and hot for this #help please #long post

[findafight]

I am deeply intrigued by all the listed AUs, but especially 'Lavender’s blue, lavender’s green, lavender’s everything we’ll be' and 'Never again we two'. If you already have asks that mention these, it's dealer's choice on what you want to elaborate on.

Ooooo nice. Never Again We Two (title from my love my life by ABBA) is a oneshot from steve's mom's pov post s4 in which she finaly comes back to hawkinsto see her son when he's hospitalized, again, and sees the room filled with people she doesn't know or only knows vaguely.

When the nurse comes in, saying Steve's momis here, steve, groggy and on pain meds, tries to sit up, saying "ma?" only to see Mrs. Harrington and immediately correct himself to "mom", because, as I headcanon it, Mrs. Henderson took one look at steve after Dustin talking her ear off about is new cool older friend and immediately adopted him. He calls her ma because she asked him to, and Dustin (her literal child) does so it's not weird what are you talking about Robin.

But anyways his mother hears the "ma? -- Mom" switch and realizes that she's missed out on so much of her son's life that he literaly calls another woman Ma and thinks of her instead when told his mother is there. It's a lot of introspection and outsider pov of the party and her mourning the loss of the relationship she could have had with Steve, and coming to terms with wanting/needing to build a new one.

I answered about LBLGLEWB (god why do I love long ass titles so much...) in a different ask but I actually love that mess of a fic so much that I will give you another taste ;)

Steve's first role is just a background part, they literally just needed bodies to fill the space and he was a contract worker already so why not shove him on the soundstage for an afternoon? but his second is as a goon for a mobster flick that, of course, weilds a baseball bat as intimidation. It is 1937 and the world is introduced to the first Buckley Twirl on film. It wasn't even his choice of prop, they just handed it to him and his brain went "I know how to use THIS!" His performance of unaffected and cool is well liked by the director, so he asked to join another picture as another gangster, this time with lines.

His fourth time on screen, he's actually helping the props department, (he still is contracted as whatever the studio needs him to do.) but the director is having what seems like and angry melt down, yelling "Do ANY of you know how to fucking dance? Show of hands!" to which Steve, son of a coal barronand and raised to know all the proper ettiquite, raises his hand. The dirctor points at him. "We need a nice transition shot and i want a wipe following dancers in front of the camera and APPARENTLY none of my extras can do that." Steve isn't sure what that means but he is capable of spinning someone directly infront of a camera, so thats fine. "Shit Now you just need a partner. GodDAMN IT."

And Steve says "My wife works here?" because that's true and Robin knows how to waltz.

Which is how they both end up in innacurate period costumes, Robin giggling because she's set to help edit this film, and being told to dance together and their cue to spin infront of the camera to block it.

The only slight hiccup, which somehow only Steve and Robin are aware of, is that Steve taught robin how to Waltz and he only taught her how to lead because she didn't want to follow. No one actually notices Robin lead steve until years later, when it's released on television and later on video, to be wondered at how they got away with it, they weren't subtle, Robin definitley chose the take where she dipped Steve in the background.

It is the first, but certainly not the last, of the little queer moments they slip into their films.

Of course, twenty years later, when Robin directs Baseball, Baby! (literaly the only film i have named in this fic lmao) There's homage to the scene, someone leading Steve's character in a dance, and of course the return of the Buckley Twirl in a less menacing fashion.

#imliterallyjustsittinghere #steve harrington #robin buckley #stobin #platonic stobin #the party #wip meme #lavender's blue au #findaanswers #finda writes stuff #steve: me andmy wife work here and can dance? director: thank FUCK #they become a common bg couple for a hot minute until robin goes 'i need to focus on editing if i wanna direct' #also steve calling mrs. henderson Ma? canon to ME #thank you for the ask i lov talking about these #edit: i am a clown and forgot steve took Robin's last name for the Harrington twirl so now its fixed to Buckley twirl thx

[breezypunk]

aaaa I don't know if you're still open to these, but uhm... number 7 maybe, if you haven't done it already? 👉👈

thank you! &lt;;3

soft otp prompts here

───── ⑅ ♡ ⑅ ─────

7- Write about one member of your ship asking the other to dance with them.

"Dance with me, V." Goro held his hand out to Vaughn who was sprawled out on the couch, eyes bloodshot red from the hours of crying he'd been doing.

Vaughn's anxiety was next level, he hadn't felt it in such a long while, his brain was in a fog, hardly able to tell what was going on, but Goro being Goro asks him to dance.

"Wow." Was all he could say. He breathed heavily, staring at Goro's hand, still stretched out towards him. Man he was a gonk, but it was so endearing. He really was so bad at this stuff, even six years into their relationship and Vaughn couldn't help but chuckle in moments like this, even if he was in such a funk, Goro tried so hard, he always tried so hard.

His ears finally started tuning in to the sounds around him, music was playing on the radio, his favorite.. Goro knew everything, didn't he?

"Fine.." He sighed slowly, sitting up and looking around the room in an attempt to bring himself back to reality. Goro's hand never faltered, he'd wait all night for Vaughn if he needed to, that was just the type of person he was, willing to wait for him, willing to understand that sometimes it took time to become comfortable with your surroundings after dealing with the high amounts of anxiety Vaughn had been dealing with, and not just at that moment, but for so many years.

He felt embarrassed and little awkward once he stood facing Goro directly. His eyes were still bloodshot red, his face was a mess, the little strands of hair were sticking to his forehead and he looked like he hadn't slept in weeks, which wasn't entirely untrue. He felt Goro's one hand wrap around his lower back lazily, just to pull him in a little closer, just so Vaughn could feel the warmth of Goro's body.

He really needed this.

"You do not need to say a word, V.. Just dance with me is all. Let it all go." Goro was right, Vaughn really did need to let it all go. His anxiety and depression stretched back to when he lost Johnny for good, for when he lost Jackie, for when he was mocked and made a laughing stock of the Bakker clan, it always piled up on him all at once until he completely lost it. But there was Goro, being the best he could possibly be, always dealing with Vaughn's outbursts, always right there when Vaughn ugly cried, when he could barely breathe, when he felt the world toppling over him twenty times over.

Goro didn't always understand what went on in Vaughn's brain, his thoughts and feelings were all over the place, but one thing Goro did know is that he wasn't going anywhere, and even if one silly dance could take the pain away even for just a brief moment, he was going to do it. He was going to slow dance with his lover in the middle of their living room, half naked, to their favorite songs all night if it meant that Vaughn would at least smile once, it's all Goro ever wanted.

Vaughn laid his head on Goro's shoulder and began to lose himself to the music, while also letting himself completely melt into Goro's arms, he felt incredibly lucky, and knew that he'd be okay for the rest of the night. He felt little pecks of kisses streaming down his neck and let out a small snort, how did Goro know how to do this so effortlessly?

Vaughn knew that even in his darkest moments he'd be okay, and even if it took a while to realize it, he knew, he just knew. Maybe all he needed was a dance, and maybe he'd start requesting them more often, Goro definitely wouldn't mind.

#hello this got deep #also yes this took a hot minute I am sorry #writing is so on and off with me :') #but I'm getting to them all I pwomise! #anyways I liked this one and it is very in character for vaughn and their relationship #cyberpunk 2077 #oc: vaughn leblanc #goro takemura #otp: golden hues #soft ship prompts #tag: inbox mail

[gggoldfinch]

The Order of Death: Chapter 8

⚠️ OC REWRITE OF MY OTHER FIC: Something Good (NOT necessary to read that first; this one is better anyway)

Sybil's Temps Commission paper-pushing life is turned completely on its head when she is victimized by a coworker's sabotage scheme and abandoned in Dallas, 1959, with no briefcase and no hope of getting back to the space-time agency. Years later, she encounters some familiar faces: the Commission's finest assassins, who just so happen to be the only other witnesses to her life-altering blunder. In a deluded attempt to assimilate back into a lifestyle of danger and adventure, she inadvertently becomes swept up in their impossible mission and thus entangled in their complicated lives. Amidst her rapidly crumbling mess of a life, Sybil find herself growing quickly and inexplicably fond of the men, who she finds are not all that scary after all.

#this one took me a hot minute. bc. new scene #weeeeeee #tua the swedes #order of death fic #goldfinch writes

[decidentia]

◈   @fallesto said: ❛ "We best get moving." (Artorias to Ciaran) ❜

Shorn of its boulderous scales, the dragon was split open.  Like fissures in quaking earth, like the bloody heart of a pomegranate.  Shadow-clad, the diminutive figure of Ciaran drew near the newly made corpse, hungry for the sight of draconic demise, for all trace of her elegant butchery.  Gauntleted hands continued to clutch the blades that had dispensed destruction – but not alone, not unaided.

Knight Artorias’ shadow passed over her like death.  Gallant and gargantuan, with sickly viscera and poisoned blood spoiling the broad silver of his greatsword.  How noble he was, even now, as the dragon before them cooled against the granite, awash in muted, ashen light.  Less ghoulish than she, and always looking to the next glory.  Easily found, in this time of war.

“We best get moving.”

All admiration was on him, then.  All fondness.  Eyes the colour of amber – of molten honey – fastened themselves to him, their intensity framed by the expanse of immutable porcelain.  Ciaran’s mask had fractured during the skirmish, cracks as fine as spider-silk spreading over its surface, most noticeable where dust settled in the fault lines.  At one edge, by her cheek, a sizable chunk was missing.  Sand-coloured skin, stippled with dark freckles and pale, pinkish scars, was now painted in crimson fingers of blood.  They stroked along her neck, and disappeared in the midnight blue of her garb.

“Verily, my lord.  Where there is one, there will surely be others.”

#i know this took me a hot minute but please know – #1. ciaran and artorias live in my mind rent-free always and forever #2. i've been itching to write in the dark souls setting and it feels amazing to get back to it! #thinking about all they must have gone through during the war of the ancient dragons ugh #thanks for sending this ♡ #◈ — answered #◈ — ic; ciaran #fallesto

[fingertipsmp3]

Why did I get paranoid about how no one has checked the work I submitted yet. It’s literally Sunday

#i mean i signed up for this last night in like the middle of the night #but i guess they either automate the sign up procedure or they have saturday office hours #it is based in the usa so if they work saturday afternoons they will have gotten my stupid application at a regular time #oh it’s freelance work. it’s basically just writing and proofreading #i just want to get approved so i can actually do the thing and then i can make at least a little money and not completely lose my mind #as i continue searching for a job. and also! when i get asked about the gap in my resume i can be like ‘yeah so i was actually freelancing’ #it will also make the job search a bit less urgent and calm me down a bit if i have an income stream in the meantime. i think #like i won’t have to apply to stuff i genuinely can’t do just because i need a job (like factories or care work. neither of which i should #probably really be doing on account of the dodgy knee) #but yeah. i was sooooo paranoid but literally… i did like 16 different example tasks for them. it took me well over an hour so it’ll #probably take a lot of time for them to mark it #i just hope they don’t reject it. that would be embarrassing as fuck. ma in english; i’m qualified to teach esl AND high school english……. #if i fail at proofreading i will simply just cry #the thing i feel like could screw me is i didn’t really understand the guidelines on maybe the first task or two because i can’t read #apparently. also i use british spellings and it’s an american company. i also didn’t realise grammarly was there and ‘helping’ me for a hot #minute. i was like ‘what are those squiggly lines for’ #look if they don’t want to keep me i’ll just keep scouring the subreddits and find something similar. it’s fine. it’s all good #this would just be perfect for me because i love writing and i love correcting other people’s mistakes lol #personal

[attic-club-sandwich]

To Ascend Again

Summary: After falling from the Celestial Realm, the seven brothers must rely on each other emotionally to cope with the loss of their sister, Lilith. Meanwhile, they are also trying to adjust to their new forms and heal both the physical and emotional wounds caused by the Celestial War. Their bonds become stronger than ever since the fall, and they learn to rise again from the calamity that befell them.

Genre: Angst/Hurt

cw: none for this chapter.

A/N: Chapter 3 is here, it's a big one. I hope you all enjoy! As always, feedback and reblogs are greatly appreciated.

Chapter 1: The Fall

Chapter 2: The Reunion

Read Chapters 1 & 2 on Ao3

Chapter 3: The Avatar of Wrath

All eyes were on Satan as he shifted uncomfortably. He attempted to hide behind the demon butler that had led him into this cursed room. He really didn’t like this. His gaze finally lifted to meet a strange, yet familiar set of crimson eyes watching him intently from across the room. “Go on, Satan. Introduce yourself.” Barbatos whispered to him.

The young demon winced as he felt a gentle hand on his back push him forward. He began to tremble, irritated at his own weakness. “M-My name is S-Satan. I-I’m the Avatar of Wrath.” His face flushed at the sound of his own voice. It was small and weak. Some Avatar of Wrath I am, he thought. To his surprise, one of the brothers he knew to be Beelzebub gave him a warm smile. “Hi, Satan. Welcome to the family. I’m Beelzebub, but Beel is just fine if you want to call me that instead.” The rest of the brothers followed suit and gathered around to introduce themselves to their new brother.

 “Oh you are so cute! I know you’ll fit in just fine! My name is Asmodeus.” Asmo exclaimed, ruffling Satan’s soft, blonde hair.

 “And I’m Leviathan, but you can call me Levi.”

 “I’m Mammon, but you can call me Mammon the GREAT.”

 “Oh come on, Mammon no one calls you that but you. My name is Belphegor. Just call me Belphie though.” 

“And I’m Lucifer. Please make yourself at home.”

As his new family greeted him, he couldn’t help but feel a sense of familiarity. It’s like he already knew them…their names, their interests, their quirks. It was all already there in his heart. However, he also knew one of them was missing, and the sadness that they all felt surrounding their lost sister. He felt such an intense sadness himself that he couldn’t explain.

His thoughts were interrupted by Diavolo's voice.  “Satan here is a special demon. Barbatos and I found him after-” Lucifer shot the demon prince a warning glare. He really didn’t want Diavolo disclosing the details of his horrific and rather embarrassing outburst after falling. His brothers could very clearly see the healing wounds on his back from his missing wings, but they didn’t ask any questions. Diavolo continued, “...After Lucifer’s fall. You see, he was born as a result of Lucifer’s intense emotion of wrath. We’ve never seen anything like it, if I'm being honest.” The brothers' heads whipped around to their elder brother. “What?! Did you actually give birth to him or somethin’?!” Mammon shrieked. Lucifer rubbed his temples as Asmodeus and Leviathan snickered at their brother’s outburst. “No, absolutely not. Don’t be ridiculous, Mammon.” Diavolo chuckled and lifted Satan into his arms. The blonde haired boy buried his face into the demon prince’s shoulder. “He was found in a pile of Lucifer’s feathers. It appears that the emotion was so strong, it had no choice but to manifest. That is why my father has chosen to title him as The Avatar of Wrath.” Barbatos stepped forward and bowed his head. “We hope you’ll welcome Satan into your family. We know this is only the beginning of the hardships you’ll face, but the fact that you’re all together will make this journey a lot less challenging for all of you.” 

*****

Days passed as the brothers recovered from the physical and mental turmoil of losing their home in the Celestial Realm. They were also getting the hang of choosing when their more demon-like appearances took over, which helped to bring a little more normalcy to their lives. Lucifer himself was on his way to a full recovery, and found that he was constantly sticking by Diavolo’s side. He really didn’t mean to abandon his brothers in their time of need, but he and Diavolo had a lot to discuss. One of those things being facing judgment before the Demon Lord. “This will merely determine your rank here within the Devildom.” Diavolo reassured him one day as they sat together in the Demon Prince’s personal library. Barbatos refilled their tea cups as he listened in. “My Father is a bit brash, but he tends to be fair with his decisions. I am confident that you all will have a place here in the Devildom.” Lucifer paused as he reached for his tea.”...And if we don’t pass this ‘jugement’?” Diavolo leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms over his chest. He stared intensely at Lucifer. “Then you’ll most likely end up in one of the lower levels of the Devildom. I must be honest with you Lucifer, that isn’t the ideal place to end up.” Lucifer’s gaze shifted to the floor. He all of a sudden was feeling nauseous. 

“If you would excuse me, Diavolo.” he said, rising up from his chair. The demon prince nodded, figuring that Lucifer needed some time to process the information. Lucifer also felt he needed to check in on his brothers, especially since gaining a new addition to their family. He had appointed Mammon to watch over them all and he grew more worried the longer he sat with Diavolo and Barbatos.

 Satan, the newest brother, was introduced to them through Lucifer’s newfound emotion of wrath following the events that led them here. He was a younger demon, only appearing to be about 8 years old. So far he’s proved to be a challenge as he figured out how to control his own power and emotion at such a young age. Even the twins being only about 12 years old were struggling with their newly acquired powers. Lucifer wandered the long hallway back to the infirmary which has since become their shared room. He could hear shouting coming from the room, and he rolled his eyes. What are they up to now? He thought. 

“Satan, ya asshole!” 

Mammon yelled as he rubbed the forming bruise on his leg. “He just hit me with his tail!”

 “And what did you do to HIM, Mammon?” Asmodeus mused. “I didn’t do nothin’!” the silver haired demon huffed. Lucifer stepped into the doorway and crossed his arms. “Didn’t I leave you to be in charge, Mammon?” The younger demon whipped around as he heard his older brother’s voice. “Yeah, and what of it?! It’s YOUR fault we even got this little twerp to take care of…” His voice faltered with regret as Satan growled and took off out of the doorway past Lucifer and disappeared down the hallway. Lucifer took a deep breath as he felt his wrath piping through his veins. He could feel the tingling sensation where his horns were threatening to form. Now was not the time to lose it on Mammon. He needed everyone’s cooperation if they were going to pass this so-called judgment Diavolo was talking about. “That’s enough, Mammon. Go find the others, I need to discuss something with all of you.”

****

Later that evening after dinner, everyone gathered in the common room of the castle. The twins shared a spot together on one of the couches, Belphie burying himself closely into Beel’s side as he had a bad feeling of what was about to transpire. Satan was sitting comfortably in Asmo’s lap on a rather large armchair, while Mammon and Levi shared the couch with the twins. The eldest demon cleared his throat as he took his spot in front of the room. “Thank you all for agreeing to meet this evening. I know you’ve all had questions for me, and I believe I’m finally ready to answer them-” Lucifer barely finished his last sentence as shouts from his brothers began to erupt from the room. 

“Where is Lilith?!” 

“What are we going to do next?”

“Why are you always hanging out with Diavolo and not your own brothers?”

“What happened to Lilith?”

Lucifer winced. He expected this, but he had to stay calm. His brothers were angry. Scared. Worried about their sister. He had to remember this. “Lilith…she’s…” he began. Tears began welling up in his crimson eyes. The older demon had spent a lot of time debating telling his brothers the full story of Lilith’s fate. He swallowed the lump in his throat and continued. “Unfortunately, Lilith didn’t make it out of the Celestial War. I’m so sorry…” He brought his hand up to cover his mouth, attempting to regain his composure. The room was completely silent, the only sound coming from the fire as it crackled and sputtered. “...Lilith…she’s…dead…?” Belphie whispered, breaking the silence. Reality began to set in for the others as well. “What the hell do ya mean she’s dead?! She can’t be! That’s not possible!” Mammon jumped up. His bat-like wings sprouted from his lower back, quivering with rage. “For once I’m actually agreeing with Mammon…” Levi said, grimly. His amber eyes filled with tears as he continued, “...After all we went through, you’re telling me she DIDN’T make it?” 

Lucifer began to tremble, his nerves getting the better of him. “I’m sorry. I truly am. I…” he bowed his head, unable to continue. He watched as his tears dripped onto the expensive looking marble flooring below him. The brothers went silent as they witnessed Lucifer begin to break down. “Lucifer…hey, it’s not your fault ok? It was a fucked up situation. But ya can’t blame yourself. ” Mammon said, attempting to comfort his older brother. The other brothers nodded in silence, their own tears now flowing freely. Everyone except Belphegor, who remained silent and staring at the floor as his twin sobbed into his shoulder. 

A few minutes passed as the brothers attempted to ground themselves again. The family meeting was far from over as they still had the upcoming judgment to discuss. Lucifer cleared his throat. “I apologize, but I must continue. Then I promise you are all free to do as you please.” Lucifer began telling them the details of the judgment before the demon lord. “It will take place in 3 days time. I hope you will all prepare yourselves accordingly. Barbatos has instructed you all to go to him if there’s anything you may need in the meantime.” The six other brothers nodded, eager for the meeting to be over after the harsh news of their late sister. “Thank you. You are all dismissed.” No time was wasted as the brothers all hurried out of the room. The sounds of doors slamming echoed through the castle. Lucifer sighed as he sunk down into the couch. He was truly exhausted, both mentally and physically. He stared up at the ceiling, praying to anyone who would listen that the results of the judgment would work in their favor.

Chapter 4: The Judgment (coming soon)

#happy thanksgiving! #here's a new chapter! #this took me a hot minute lol #obey me #obey me writing #obey me fanfiction #to ascend again #cass writes #my posts #my writing #obey me! one master to rule them all #obey me! shall we date #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me series #demon brothers #obey me lilith #fanfiction #obey me fic #obey me fanfic #reblogs appreciated