#tw arophobia

[our-arospec-experience]

"who do you have a crush on??"

no lol

"oh come on it has to be someone!!!"

nope lmao

"you can trust me!!"

1 no i cant 2 ill buy a very strangly shaped mug if i have to keep talking about this

"theres someone i know it!!!!! tell me or ill find out myself!!!"

good luck with that :v

"just tell meeeee"

fine wanna know the truth?? *pulls out really shiny rock* this is who i have a crush on

*disaproving allo sounds*

i hate my school. literally sense the 2nd grade crushes mattered way to much lmao

:(

rocks are way better than crushes to be fair

#our arospec experience #arospec #aromantic #aro #lgbtqia+ #queer #tw arophobia #tw amatonormativity #thanks for the ask :)

[kittycathat]

You don't gotta say your aro/ace to let us know you get no bitches, we can tell from afar

sounds like you're coping tbh <33

#got this ask and thought it was funny #because like #maybe your point is that im unattractive but still #that's great that I “get no bitches” because that would put me in an awkward place #like honestly its stressful rejecting people aahhahahha #aromantic #lgbtqia #lgbtq #queer #aroace #non sam aro #aro #anon #tw arophobia #arophobia #aphobia #tw aphobia #anon ask #anon hate

[bloggingboutburgers]

You'd think I wouldn't have to beat a dead horse but... No actually you wouldn't, seems we all very much have to beat a dead horse on the regular

Hope you've had a good aromantic spectrum awareness week, everyone 💚🤍🩶🖤 I'll be there all... the time.

#no one can know i don't like sex #aromantic #aromantic spectrum awareness week #aromantic awareness week #asaw 2024 #tw aphobia #tw arophobia #my art #nonburger

[theautisticfroglord]

I genuinely hate when people invalidate demiromantic/demisexual/other labels in general by saying somethin like "OMG!!!! why do these labels exist that's how every relationship is!!!!! what has this generation come to?!!?,!?!!"

some people out here are dating someone they just met two days ago. while it literally took me two whole years of getting to know someone before having a crush on them. can y'all please not find excuses to invalidate aspec/arospec people. thanks

#slightly serious post #demiromantic #I am demiromantic #NO HATE TO ANYONE #no hate #demisexual #demi #LGBTQ #aspec #arospec #actually arospec #queer #aro positivity #ace positivity #tw aphobia #tw arophobia #slight rant #proship dni

[tocomplainfriend]

Danidraws again! Ace and Aro - phobia detected!

TW: Ace and Aro phobia, Arophobia, Acephobia!

Dani made fun of a AroAce Alastor fan for drawing him for AroAce PSA posts:

Person killing fun and comfort of other people, cause... IDK... you are just an asshole, I guess?

Why so mean about a AroAce doing a PSA for people in the fandom who have, time and time again, not known this same things. -And discriminate and attack people cause of not knowing shit.

This sounds like such a "UM! ERMM! Canonically, this character wouldn't b-" shut up. Let Aroace people have their conform and care to explain things to people! You are mean for no reason

Also, the fact of Alastor possible not knowing about Asexuality out of pure guess isn't correct. #1 People can fully use his character for pride month art and AroAce PSA stuff! #2 Asexuality as a term has existed since late 1800 and related stuff to rights of people of different sexualities. In the 1900 Schlegel was quoted: “Let the same laws for all the intermediate stages of sexual life: the homosexuals, heterosexuals, bisexuals, asexuals, be legal as they are now in existence for the heterosexuals” search it up. #3 what's stopping him from learning it, or making fan comics of him doing so?

Sorry, all your knowledge of previous queer awareness comes from the 1980s to 1990s only.

There are many stories of people (FROM AGES AGO) that fall into being Trans! That the term didn't exist all those years ago-it doesn't delete anything from that, or that people can see themselves in them and do PSAs with them in it!

He could've known or not.

(Dani, and anyone, would totally do something with characters they identify with in their own ways too, like this shit is so dumb to complain about as if no one did similar stuff!)

Literally a hypocrite:

Being mean to people about stuff!

(other things about DaniDraws)

#vivziepop critical #helluva boss critical #helluva boss criticism #hazbin hotel criticism #tw acephobia #tw arophobia

[theveryattacheduser]

I'm so mad about the stigma around the aromantic community, how we are constantly minimized and how we should just " wait to find the one." Aromanticism is fluid, someone might feel little feelings towards another person while another may be romantically repulsed and just not date or have romantic feelings at all. I'm so fucking done with feeling invalidated each time I talk about being arospec and the aromantic community.

#like stfu please #you have no right to say that shit #aromance #aro #arospec #aromantic #aromanticism #tw #tw arophobia #aphobia #tw aphobia #cw swearing

[very-uncorrect]

Aromantic is trending #1 rn, if this is to combat the massive influx of aphobia recently on sites like Twitter then that makes me very happy

#aromantic #tw aphobia #tw arophobia #asexual #tw acephobia #because I've seen both happening #i don't identify with the labels anymore #but i still love and support aspecs #y'all are valid and i love you

[anulithots]

ahhh this subject, this topic, this 'if you don't get married then you aren't an adult and your whole life should revolve around the whole family thing' and talking as if it is a given, this looming doom over my queer head. 

On one hand the documentary is nice because sometimes parents are understanding. Mine aren't, and for some reason they hardly show the not-so-accepting ones when it comes to minorities but alas, there are the surprisingly accepting ones. It's a hit or miss and quite the Russian roulette. 

On the other hand the sentiment of 'you must get married' is there regardless. I don't think I'd be able to explain the way I feel about the whole thing without too many sappy words and metaphors that I'd never be able to say before interjections and overall disdain. AND the threat looms ever nearer. I don't like getting older in a society with expectations. It's not for me. I’m not sure what I will do. At all. I do not see a solution because of two completely warring ideologies. And I’m not sure who to ask because no one I know is both desi and on the aroace spectrum sooo…. I guess I’ll have to figure something out or run away to the woods when I’m older. Not that I can handle isolation. So there’s that too. And I don’t think I’m being over dramatic…sometimes I am but last time I even touched this subject briefly with my parents, it was a whole thing, spirals and not fun for months and months and drastic stuff. So Adult life things? If it’s anything like last year's brush with this then I’ll need to build up some ‘happiness inducing and comfort mechanisms’ ahead of time. 

I don’t know. Sometimes it feels like I’m in the tentative, last ‘safe period’ of my life. From here it’s…. Choices I don’t want to make. Ha. Fun. 

Apologies for the unsolicited rant! 

#aromantic #aroace #tw acephobia #tw arophobia #aspec #aromantism #arospec #aromantic asexual #aro #aroflux #aroacespec #aro spec #asexual aromantic #I'm somewhere along the spectrum #and there was a documentary in school about desi american marriage for rhetorical analysis #I'm the only desi person in the class #and...yea it reminded me of this whole dilemma #and I was going to randomly submit this to my teacher along with my essay in the comments of it because I put random comments in my assingm #assignments #but I decided not to #so on tumblr it goes #take care of yourself #oh more colors #asexual

[scarletspider-lily]

this bullshit discourse around cishet aromantic men is driving me insane and im not aromantic or aspect in the slightest but i gotta rant. because it's just getting very ridiculous at this point, because people make assumptions about everyone and also want to twist the definition of being queer- for some reason?? 1) "well- well they dont get oppressed!! >:(" sorry, pause, why the FUCK are we making "oppression" a part being lgbtq+ ? is this some new fucking requirement?? are you people okay?? i dont give a fuck if some queer child has had the best life ever in a super inclusive area from the second they were born, i would be happy for them?? maybe you should too? listen, ive faced oppression for being bisexual, and have felt envious of those with accepting family and whatnot, but what im not going to do is discredit my fellow queer person for facing "less" or no oppression at all for their identity. crazy take, but i think the goal should be to reduce queer oppression...

and oppression is not... some fixed scale type of thing, someone was trying to say that being asked "when will you get married?" to aro people wasn't oppression. as if that is not the only thing aro people face, as if instituitions like marriage dont exist, with certain economic benefits aro people can't partake in, and social constructs making certain people seem "weird" and straight up ostracized from social groups if they choose not to partake in romance.

2) amatonormativity is a thing, look it up. i get that it may be frustrating if you are allo to accept that youve been taught a lot of stuff about romance that seems magical and all encompassing and you dont want to give it up, but no one is asking you to do that. i used to be taken aback at some things aro folks pointed out, but as ive read more, ive realized that romance is wonderful to some people but shouldnt be held up as the ultimate pedestal in society. so, romanticize romance and whatnot if you personally want to, but understand that certain social constructs may harm people, especially those who do not want relationships for whatever reason. plus, learning about amatonormativity has helped me positively go about my own relationships- platonic and otherwise! 3) im gonna piss people off with this one, but please stop with the bullshitty radfem takes about cishet men being the ultimate spawn of satan, or something. the jokes here and there were one thing, but some of you guys actually believing that most of what cishet men do is inherently evil is legitimately concerning and this doesnt do much to actually help any matters. no, the man choosing to have another hookup this week or continuing to fuck a female friend-with-benefits isnt the ultimate enemy here against women. most takes on "hookup culture" generalize a lot of people's experiences, and i know there is research backing multiple perspectives on this, but at the end of the day what needs to be realized is that you cannot stop two consenting people from doing things together. it has no impact on you, and does not have a grand impact on society. unless you have definitive proof that whatever evil man you're talking about is "using women", there's no point to what you are saying, and if there is such a man, cishet aro men still are legitimate in their identity. would you exclude gay people from the community because of gay people who do bad things? would you do that for most identities? no? what makes this so drastically different, then? dont pull the oppression argument again for the love of god anyways, i hope all the cishet aro men and aro people in general are having a nice day. you will always be a part of the lgbtq+ community. dont let anyone tell you otherwise, or discredit you for the amount of "oppression" you face, as im sure they dont know half of any struggles you have. and if you (or any queer person in general) do happen to have few struggles, im very happy for you, as that's how it should be!!

#rant #i genuinely cannot stand this discourse anymore #discourse critique #queer #aro #aromantic #arophobia #tw arophobia #scarletspider-lily #long post #btw im not aro so if i got smth wrong lmk but ya!

[l00ney-m00ny]

Aroace culture is your father always making jokes about your mother beating him, and yet she never lays a finger on him. You know they love each other very much.

Aroace culture is your grandmother telling you that men are worthless, and yet her husband does all the work. They smile and laugh like nothing matters.

Aroace culture is your Aunt forever saying you'd make a lovely wife to some man. She tells you to never give a man the time of day.

Aroace culture is being told by everyone that you'd make a man very happy one day, that they'll love you and you can have kids and be happy. That your lost desire for sex is a problem, that you haven't found the right person yet.

Aroace culture is saying you'll wait for marriage, is saying you haven't found The One.

Aroace culture is never wanting what everyone else has, and yet feeling so broken when you don't have it.

#aroace #aro #aromantic #ace #asexual #aroace culture is #aroace culture #pyro speaks #acespec #tw acephobia #tw arophobia

[raineofthedragons]

I don’t know why it’s so common for people to say that queer/trans characters are a political statement, that the writers are ‘going woke’, people being themselves and existing as themselves is not political. I’ve also seen this with real people, not just characters. People’s existence isn’t a grab for attention. Not everything has to have some secret ulterior motive. Just let people be themselves.

#lgballt #lgbt comic #lgbtqia #lgbt #nonbinary #trans #lgbtqplus #transgender #asexual #ace #acespec #aromantic #aroace #arospec #tw transphobia #tw arophobia #tw acephobia #tw enbyphobia #tw biphobia #guess who had an original thought for once :)

[our-arospec-experience]

In light of recent asks,

Cishet aro men are valid. This blog will not tolerate arophobia.

all asks containing hate of any sort will be reported and deleted.

💚🤍🩶🖤

#Tw hate #tw arophobia #tw aphobia #aromantic #our arospec experience #arospec #aro

[aveline-amelia]

On Sherlock, asexuality and arguing interpretation

I wanted to speak about this for a while but I was afraid of my words being twisted and being misunderstood. This is not pointed at a particular person. It is not meant to anger or sadden people. To repeat, all headcanons are valid. All ships are valid. This is not meant as a rebuttal of a particular reading of a character's identity or a reading of the show.

I have time and time again seen people say things like "It's so frustrating to see people say Sherlock can't be in love with John because he's asexual. People can be asexual and still in a romantic relationship!" And every time, I wanna say. "Yes, for some people that's true. But they meant aroace. They meant aroace. They clearly meant aroace. (aromantic asexual)"

A lot of people unfamiliar or uneducated with asexuality use "asexual" in place of "aroace". That's how I used it too when I discovered what it was. There was this article about a young woman who felt no sexual or any kind of attraction towards anyone. She was perfectly content with family connection and close friendships. She masturbated but didn't fantasise about anyone while she did and found it strange to find out people even do that.

When a person says they believe Sherlock is asexual and thus cannot be in love with John, this is what they mean most of the time.

They believe he does not participate in relationships or sex and is focused on the Work because he feels no sexual or romantic attraction towards anyone. And most of them feel represented by that because it aligns with their own experiences.

Now, Sherlock could be homoromantic or biromantic or even heteroromantic and asexual. He could be demisexual or gray ace.

But if a gay ace Sherlock and John entered a relationship on the show and they kissed and held hands and were a couple and got married. Guess what?

That would primarily be representative of a same-sex/gay couple. Sherlock is not on HBO. Even if they made Johnlock canon, they would never show them have sex on screen, probably not even implicitly. Sherlock was never going to be about discussion of sexual boundaries and consent. To the majority of the audience, it would have been a gay couple in a sexual (and romantic) relationship.

To quote someone, gay ace is still gay. A gay ace Sherlock would still be a version of asexual Sherlock. But it's not the same thing.

The same way if an ace Sherlock dated Molly and they were a couple, it would be more relatable to heterosexual, bisexual, people attracted to the opposite/different sex people because it aligns with their experiences. That doesn't mean heteroromantic ace people are the same as allo straights. They are not, unless they consider themselves as such.

When people say they want an asexual Sherlock, they mean one that is not dating or having sex with anyone, not John, Molly, Irene, Lestrade nor an original character.

They want to see that identity represented, that you can feel fulfilled in friendships and family relationships. That friendship is not less than, less important, less valuable. That not dating anyone doesn't make you broken.

That not everyone needs a sexual and/or romantic relationship!

That you don't need romantic entanglement to be complete as a human being!

But the inverse is also true.

People will claim it's better Johnlock isn’t canon because Sherlock is ace and that's better and evil Johnlockers are erasing his identity!

Moffat implied asexuality is boring ("...it's someone who abstains that's interesting.... it's a choice of a monk, not a choice of an asexual..") and stories where a character never falls in love is boring. He was going for celibacy, not asexuality. Don't give the writers credit for something at best implied on accident.

Is asexuality a valid and valuable reading? Yes, it is. But it's not canon. The same way Johnlockers saying making asexual Sherlock is erasing gay representation, or that ace Sherlock headcanons make them mad, or calling someone an "asexual fuck" and sending them hate, so is using ace representation as a shield to explain why you don't want more gay representation and that sacred male&male friendships should not be soiled by evil gay sex!

We should be able to have both. We should have more m&m friendships, m&f friendships and more gay, bi and ace representation!

Stop saying "why can't men just be friends?" You do not sound like someone advocating for more male friendship visibility. You just sound like a homophobe. If you see John and Sherlock as strong male friendship or "brothers" (*sigh*). Okay.

If you see them as a same-sex couple, that's great too. Do you. Just let others do the same.

#what to tag #sexuality in sherlock #asexuality #tw acephobia #tw aphobia #tw arophobia #sherlock holmes #john watson #johnlock #asexual sherlock #gay sherlock

[kirkshouseplant]

Funny how Aromanticism is valid until it doesn't conform with your idea of what it should be.

#aromantic #tw arophobia #im so mad #cishet aro men dont deserve this shit #theyre just as valid as the rest of us

[tocomplainfriend]

It feels less like you want to address a real life problem to characters, but more like you want to have another of your characters you constantly baby and want others to fangirl over.

TW: Rape, SA, Racism, Stereotyping, Homophobia, Acephobia, Arophobia.

The representations of topics in media DOES affect real people.

Fiction can affect reality.

Let's start easy, Jaws. This goes back to Hazbin I promise.

"Since the release of Jaws in 1975, the world has witnessed a staggering decline of 71% in shark and ray populations, and around 100 million sharks are killed each year." (including multiple practices of mass hunting sharks in competition)

Both Steven Spielberg and the original writer Peter Benchley regret the movie and book. It's a big reason of the shark treatment, when it started by old fishermen worrying about shark biting people in the beaches they made money of.

Even if you aren't a shark killer yourself, a lot of things you believe of sharks are untrue myths that come from making sharks "evil" human killer animals. Sharks cannot smell blood from miles away, that's not even how water works, the particles of blood need to enter their nostrils. Sharks are not man eaters, they attack other prey animals before human. Shark attacks are extremely rare, even if they happen they are not justifiable to kill all sharks.

Sharks actually have personalities they can fit in, they are smart and recognize people and boats- and form positive relationships with people. They can even like getting pet by people.

Other level to represent other thing sin media that affects reality we can address Queer, representation as a topic.

I hope it is not a surprise for you... possible non-straight, non-cis person reading this. That the constant representation of gay man as kid predator is a problem. They used old commercial (PSA) to spread negative views of gay man. Media is used to spread messages and affect its viewer. This is, there are cartoons created by Jehovah witness (or similar religions) to spread their beliefs and teach to their children in an easy, digestible way.

Same with the amount of straight woman that went off to read shitty yaoi manga and fetishy gay wattpad stories, and went to sexualize and diminish queer men. Constantly making gay man's personality into bottom or top (uke and seme shit). I witness this irl, others have too.

Same with shitty men that view Lesbians as a porn machine for men, cause "monkey brain like woman, lesbian = two women". Which happens in general and adult media. All of these are EASY examples.

Another one which turns out many people don't think about. Having your representation of an AroAce character (on purpose or not) be the psychopath with no feelings. Associating the not being romantically or sexually to means you have no heart, to be abnormal, by then a psychopath. An abuse or serial killer.

Fiction does affect reality-

A racist film, 'Birth of the nation' Revived the KKK and let to all the discrimination, and the homicide of black people of centuries ahead.

-

Coming back around, how you treat the topic of SA, and r-pe- affects the real world. You would think someone who wrote that, had in mind on how that affects people in real life. Didn't you want to represent victims of SA/R-pe that are sex workers and male?

Reducing the r-pist, pimp, trafficker character to an air head to treat as silly is crazy to do. Specially as... oh idk... the creator? Both this and the tweet of the voice actor calling Val "Bubbles Coded" is so crazy. The character is also not deep enough by itself, it's pretty much Stupid and a R-pist sex trafficker. The tweet below Viv's fucking kills me too.

The fact Val is shown to be air head stupid doesn't delete he backed Angel (and by being a sex trafficker and a pimp, and him licking charlie that means he has multiple victims) into a corner and under his control. Too then abuse of him in many different ways. Manipulations are not only done by Super mastermind people, and representing it in such way diminished, affects people who have being manipulated and actually try to question if they have being or not. Manipulators can be normal, average people, they usually are not obvious. Even if Val is openly a shitty person that's really obvious, it doesn't detract from him being manipulative to people. The scene where Val threatens him in chains that is manipulation, his text messages are manipulation (even if you think it is too obvious to be successful).

How you represent SA/R-PE, and its perpetrators, do affect real life.

Going around and having your "serious R-pe episode", to then go in other episodes or the other series you are writing to make r-pe/sa jokes is terrible. For the person that directed the whole scene of poison to NOT be r-pe/sa victim (said by themselves) with a r-pe fetish with this character's in specific, to directed in the most graphic way possible is awful. To go around babying your r-pist character is crazy.

Hope you understand that this doesn't mean not treating any topic at all. Creators should be awere on how they treat topics and the scenarios they create with them, too. People and viewers need to also put their brain to understand the media they consume. But you can't always put all blame only on the viewers of a series, if media is messy is a fault of the media. You can criticize both.

You need to acknowledge Valentino is indeed a terrible person, You don't need to delete his actions or the weight of them.

I also just know that a lot of Val fans just like him to draw him in r-pe art and get their fetishized gay ship. Cause that's what they are into. You won't even do that with a woman, because you are into your fucked up fetishized gay porn from wattpad you never left behind.

If you like him, FUCK IT, just please take his abuse seriously. Don't default your entire usage, and view of the character to be 'uwufied' fandom stuff, please.

I hate how the topic has being treated, in and out of the show. I'm a victim, and I'm hurt by how these things are treated and knowing how it affects others. Even in things I haven't watched! Don't make the argument don't like it? Just don't watch it. The movies from the video of SA of men being a joke, many I haven't watch- that still affects over all. It's still a problem and it's disheartening.

Also have this:

#hazbin critical #hazbin hotel criticism #hazbin hotel critical #hazbin hotel critique #vivziepop critical #vivziepop criticism #vivziepop critique #tw sa #tw rape #tw homophobia #tw racsim #tw acephobia #tw arophobia

[your-blorbos-are-queer]

this morning, a blog called @/did-is-not-real commented on my ace barbie post, saying "not queer." i then visited their blog to block them and found an entire blog dedicated to calling people "cringe" and commenting on ace/aro positivity posts, saying "not queer" or "attention seeking behavior."

i acknowledge that none of their posts get any notes, but the fact that they are still able to make posts means that they are succeeding. i encourage anyone who feels comfortable to block and report them so that they cannot continue their aphobic bullshit.

#asexual #aromantic #tw aphobia #tw acephobia #tw arophobia #tw queerphobia #queer #a is for ace/aro #lgbt #lgbtq #lgbtqia #lgbt+ #lgbtq+ #lgbtqia+ #your blorbos are queer