tonytonwy

[tonytonwy]

Answers from the Past

synopsis: where you see your ex, Ushijima Wakatoshi after two years and remember bittersweet memories.

tags: bit angsty (I'm sorry, I recommend listening to a sad song), past memories are a bit horny, good ending (maybe? depends on the reader muahaha)

You look at the two tofu’s that you’ve just bought, stuck between which one would make a better hamburger. Mhm, spicy firm or herby super-firm, I suppose super-firm would be tastier but then Shi-

“Y/N,” you widen your eyes and turn to see your ex-boyfriend, Ushijima standing there, face still as stoic as ever and a bag full of green vegetables. You suddenly remember those late nights, learning so many recipes that ‘maximised muscle growth’, perfecting ‘Hayashi Rice’ along the way. You ignore how he still uses your re-usable bag that has small cows all over it.

21st birthday, you remember that night, you had planned a surprise birthday party; everyone from Shiratorizawa and Schweiden Alders came, confetti and alcoholic air filling up the apartment. You could never forget Ushijima’s face, it was like giving 20 puppies to a spoilt child: shocked, secretly so happy, and unbelievably still stoic all at once.

“Wakatoshi oh my god,” you’ve always shown your emotions through your face and voice, something Ushijima bitterly cherished. Your voice is surprised, your cheeks slightly flushed, and you’re glad you dressed up a bit at least. “What are you doing here in Hyōgo?”

“I-”

“Wait, let me guess, ‘I am practicing for the national’s game that is in 3 months’?” You say while giving that cheeky smile and eyes shining, and Ushijima’s chest suddenly feels heavy. The last time he had seen that smile was almost two years ago, but he still felt his heart stir up the same way.

“Correct,” he gives a soft smile, and he remembers the ‘telepathy game’ you two would set up randomly where you would stare into his olive expressionless eyes and try to guess what he would be thinking.

To be fair, you got it right about 99% of the time, and the 1% percent you never got was because Ushijima would, weirdly, sometimes get sappy.

You stare into his intense eyes, slowly going closer to his face, lips millimeters away, your smile growing. You were teasing him.

“I bet…” you see how his eyes perk up a bit, interested in your answer. You’re in his bed, sheets messily covering some parts on your body, however Ushijima’s muscular chest is out, shining with the early sun. “Right now, you’re thinking about how you can improve your serve reception.”

You see how his eyebrows slightly twitch and you think you’ve got him again. However, Ushijima shakes his head, a smile peeping through. It’s almost weird how you can read his mind, because he was literally thinking about his serve reception about 2 minutes ago.

“Incorrect.”

“You’re lying.” You look dramatically shocked, and you’ve pulled your face and body away much to Ushijima’s distaste.

“Incorrect as well,” he gives a deep laugh as you punch his chest playfully. “I was thinking about my serve reception a few minutes ago, yes, but now,”

His strong arms cage you in and you’re suddenly being pulled towards him, face to face with this beast, lips once again dangerously close, your eyes are shining with the soft sunlight and your cheeks are unapologetically pink.

“I’m thinking about you.” He swiftly kisses you, hands roaming all over your body, giving random squeezes. You give a pleased hum, letting yourself be loved by this man who, years ago, would never say such a thing.

“That was such a dirty move, Wakatoshi,” you get on top of him, straddling his waist while giving a small glare but he’s immune to such childish things. You get down and kiss him all over; neck, collarbone, cheeks being attacked by your overflowing affection.

“I learnt from the best.”

“I guess I’m still pretty good at the telepathy game, huh?” You laugh and hope he doesn’t hear the bitter-sweetness in your voice or how you’re fiddling with the plastic packaging of the tofu. Your shoulders feel heavy and despite how calm you appear, you feel a hurricane of butterflies in your stomach, it’s almost nauseating.

This feeling reminds you of the lonely nights when he would stay late training, dinner getting cold and ending up in the fridge for him to warm up, the endless trips and the helpless agony of loving someone who didn’t love you as much as you thought they did.

It was exhausting, loving Ushijima. You gave everything you had, and you loved it, but, one day, it just all came down.  

“I want to apologize,” Ushijima looks at the floor, embarrassment in his tone. “What I did yesterday was incredibly selfish and disappointing.”

“I understand that you’re sorry, but,” you sigh, a headache coming through. It’s hard to breathe, it feels like a knife going in and out of your throat and you want your mum to hold you, tell you it’s okay like when you were a child.

“It was my birthday, Wakatoshi. I just,” you have no words to express how used you feel, how stupid you must’ve look, how absolutely foolish you must be. “I booked the dinner, I invited my friends, I thought you were in an accident because, of course you didn’t go on your phone at all at practice!”

Ushijima winces, not having enough shameless pride to look at you.

“I will try harder to pay attention to your needs,” you know he just speaks like that, it’s his way of communicating that is 'efficient' and it’s usually endearing but right now, it’s annoying, its fatiguing and most of all, it’s not enough.

“My needs?” You feel your voice raise up slightly, “forgetting your partner’s birthday is a basic human thing. I have never once, forgotten your birthday, your mother and grandma’s birthday, our anniversary but it appears to you that, that ‘need’ is a chore.”

“It’s not a chore.”

“Let me finish, please,” you can’t help but let tears stream down your cheeks and your face feels hot with anger, embarrassment, and sadness. You feel so insecure, the fat on your body feels more gross, more heavy, more disgusting, your eyes feel puffy and hurt already from crying last night and your hair feels dry yet oily at the same time.

“I know that volleyball is your life, and I love that aspect of you, but,” you choke a sob and feel Ushijima’s hand on your shoulder but you swat it away.

“I can’t do this, I’m sorry but,” you see his pained look, his eyes still stoic but you see the tinges of sadness, anger, and disappointment. Your fists are white with anger, “I don’t want to be a second priority anymore, Wakatoshi.”

His breath is staggered, as if he’s just played nationals and is on the last point to lose.

“You’re feeling a lot of emotions, I understand that, but can we talk this through?” He puts his hand out, hoping you’ll take it. He needs this, he knows how much he’s messed up.

“What is there to talk about?” You say, your shoulders that were so tense before, falling in tiredness. “You will never love me as much as you love volleyball, you never will love me as much as I have loved you, that’s it. You’re too busy for me, that’s fine, but what else is there to talk about?”

“I,” Ushijima stays quiet. You want him to deny it, to profess his undying love for you, that he’ll train less, but what would that do? He would just resent you for limiting his chances to be the best. Really, you want him to cry and suffer but you’re pretty sure that’s due to the anger.

But he doesn’t, he’s quiet, stoic, and calm and you hate it. The air is thick and suffocating with silence.

“I’m going to my place for today, I’ll pick my stuff tomorrow, or Monday. I’ll see.”

“Is this it?” His voice slightly wavers.

“I think so. I think, we shouldn’t together.” You sigh, more tears coming out. “I need time, to heal and love myself because I’ve used up all my love and energy on you. I’m sorry, Wakatoshi.”

You get your phone, keys and shoes and walk out, those sad, quiet, olive eyes following. You remember the walk back to your house, realizing that fresh air has never felt so cold, revolting, and lonely.

You wince as you remember that moment, looking back, you felt a bit bad for how harsh you were with him. Despite your friends saying that you ‘should’ve broken his heart more’, or ‘hurt him the way he hurt you’, or even, ‘why do you feel sorry for putting yourself first?’.

Ushijima feels the regret and guilt on the back of his neck, like an uncomfortable sweat, the break-up affected him, of course, but he had no idea how much he missed your jokes, your smile, and your accurate guesses. You look healthy at least, for some reason, you have this radiating aura about you. He feels the need to apologize, to redeem himself, anything at this point.

He wants another chance.

“Are you busy now?”

“Are you excited for Nationals?”

You both stare at each other before you laugh a bit, awkwardly but its endearing in Ushijima’s eyes. He’s always found you endearing, even when he told you it was annoying; your loud singing in the shower, the way you had to stop to pet each dog in the park and even when you would tickle him despite his immense hatred for it.

“Sorry, I’ll answer your question, I am very excited for Nationals, I think we will win.” You laugh at his confidence, hands going through your hair and that’s when Ushijima feels his heart drop.

The gold ring shining through your hair.

“You’ve always been so confident.” You say but drop your smile as you see how his face has contorted in a way you can’t really read.

“You’re married.” You’re shocked and confused by his accusation but then your shoulders jump, and you realize what he means.

“Oh yes, well, no, I’m engaged.” You smile as you look at your ring, a small tear-drop diamond. You remember your fiancé's face as you both had breakfast, his big eyes staring at you with such an intensity, you thought you had done something wrong. Only for him to propose. “I’ve been engaged for about, 3 days now. Still not used to it.”

Ushijima, for maybe once in his life, wants a hole to swallow him up. He was about to ask you out, only to find out you’re engaged with a man who, he hopes, is a good one, or better than him at least.

“Did you move on fast?” Ushijima’s says the question quickly, his face serious yet you can see that he’s hoping you say ‘no’, and you give a small smile, his honesty was always one of your favorite things about him. You also think about your fiancé's sense of honesty and realize you might have a type.

“No, after we ended things, it took me a while to start dating again. I couldn’t see a couple and not cry.” You laugh at your pitiful past. “But he became my friend, and I told him, well, about us, and he patiently waited for me,” Ushijima ignores the painful thumping in his chest and how your face flushes a bit, it reminds him of when you two first started going out. Sure, Ushijima has gone out with a few girls but he would mentally compare them to you and break it off before it would get too serious.

“I see, are you his main priority?” He wants to know everything about you guys, for some reason, he wants to see how good this guy is.

“Please don’t compare yourself to him, Wakatoshi.” You say, again reading his mind perfectly without him even knowing. “You were amazing in your own way, but I think it was just bad timing between us, you were so busy with volleyball, and I was so enamored by you, I neglected myself.”

“I-”

“Y/N!” Ushijima sees how a small girl, with grey hair and big yellow eyes comes up to you. “Uncle Shin is wondering what present we should get Mummy and he wants your input!”

His heart shatters harder as you squat down to the girl’s height, giving a big smile. Your motherly instinct coming out as you fix her dress and tie her shoelaces while talking.

“Well honey, I think we should get her that expensive perfume she loves, what do you think?” The little girl’s eyes shine and nods enthusiastically. You get your wallet out, and hand her some coins. Ushijima can’t help but wonder what you’ll be like if you were a mum, and how you would've deal motherhood with him always away if you had stayed with him.

Perhaps it is good you ended things before things got too serious, he thinks bitterly.

“Get yourself some chocolate,” before the little girl takes it, you pull back, “share with Shinsuke, okay?”

“Of course!” The girl seems to finally notice Ushijima and makes a scared face, hiding behind you and whispering, “who’s the scary man?”

Ushijima hears this clearly, but his face doesn’t change, just staring at the girl. He’s in shock, from seeing his ex-girlfriend, finding out she’s engaged and now, an evil little girl appearing out of thin air.

“That man is my friend I haven’t seen in a long time, I’ll meet up with you guys in a few minutes, okay?” The girl hugs you tightly, while giving Ushijima a big glare. Brat, he thinks as she runs off, her pigtails flowing through.

“Sorry, she’s a bit attached to me,” you give a small smile, not sure what else to say.

“I want to say sorry again, y/n, for how I behaved in our relationship. I’ve realized I never quite apologized for how I acted, and I never thanked you for your endless patience. You said that I was amazing in my own way but that’s not true at all. I messed up, a lot, and each time you forgave me and taught me how to be a better partner.” He bows and you try to ignore other customers’ stares.

However, at the same time, you feel this bittersweet jab in your chest, despite it being two years ago, you finally feel some sense of closure as he says those words.

“It’s okay, Wakatoshi. Thank you for your words, wow, uhm, our brains are wired differently I guess, please don't put all the blame on yourself.” You want him to stop apologizing, you appreciate his sweet words but where was this two years ago, you sourly think.

“No, that’s no excuse for my behavior and how I treated you.” You feel your breath hitch, this wasn’t what you were expecting at all. “I hope your partner treasures you forever, in the way I should’ve done so. I also would like you to know that, despite the fact we are no longer together, I still have pieces of you with me, forever. I sometimes sing in the shower, I pet dogs that approach me in the park, I remember all my friends’ and acquaintances’ birthdays. You’ve taught me these things and I will always cherish these bits of you that have now become me.”

You’re not sure what to feel, but you definitely want to cry, it’s a painful nostalgic feeling in your stomach. You’ve learnt so much from him as well. You now watch volleyball matches unironically, you love eating Hayashi rice and read all the stupid ads in a magazine.

“Wakatoshi...”

“I’m not done,” you see how his face is flushed a bit, “I’m trying to amend for the things I should’ve said two years ago. I also want to apologize if I embarrass you now.”

He takes a deep breath, his chest feels so tight and tries to not think about you in a wedding dress, married to someone else, giving that big smile.

“Thank you!” Your eyes widen as he shouts it out, people now fully staring. You see how his cheeks and ears are very red now, “for loving me and giving me an opportunity to be loved!”

He stands up, straight as always, his face still slightly red but those eyes are still stoic as ever. You give a big smile, bowing back.

“Thank you as well!” You shout, not caring about people’s stares as tears threaten to come out. “For letting me love you, unapologetically and shamelessly. And, I hope you find someone who will love you the way I did, or more.”

Impossible, you loved me so much, I didn't know what to do with it.

You look up, still bowing to see Ushijima’s soft smile and a pained look in his eyes, and smile back.

“You should go, the chocolate might all be eaten by now.” Ushijima turns, he had practice in two hours anyways. He feels lighter, perhaps he'll be able to jump better.

"Thank you, Ushijima!" You walk the other way, waving to him as he gives a small wave.

fin.

authors note: break-ups are hard HAHAHA

also feel like ushijima was a bit ooc?? idk idc I wrote this last night sobbing for some reason. anyways thanks for reading:))

#haikyuu #fanfic #haikyuu!! #x reader #fluff #ushijima #ushijima wakatoshi #ushijima x reader

[tonytonwy]

jump in

A small drabble based on ‘a change in routine’ but can be read alone :)

The water is freezing.

At least the first few seconds, however, you feel the refreshing cold water hit you like a wave, it's soothing against your hot skin. You never thought summer in Japan could be so humid and hot. You rise up, laughing, mostly in disbelief as Kita also rises up, touching your arm. It feels electric, his touch as it softly grips your forearm. You can basically touch the floor, your sandals feeling like awkward flippers that don’t fit in the river.

"Before you can ask, I'm fine!" You say, laughing in pure shock, your hair wet against your forehead.

You see truly an amazing sight.

His hand is still on you but his other hand goes to his mouth, slightly covering it as he laughs. Loudly. You can only smile, absolutely enamored of Kita's laugh. It's soft, warm, and god, so him. You wish you weren’t 14 right now, you wish you weren’t on exchange, you wish you could stop romanticising the idea of him.

"Well, I won't ask then! Glad ya' having a good time." He says, also in disbelief. He runs his hand against his forehead, forearms already starting to thicken up with muscle, slicking his hair back and you think you've ascended to heaven.

"The water is amazing," you dive back down quickly before going back up, taking a deep breath of the fresh, crisp air.

"Yeah, it's," he gulps, not sure what to say. You had been staying with them for a few months now so, naturally, he had gotten closer to you but this was a new moment for him. He's not one to lie, to himself or to anyone but he's not sure what to do with these sudden emotions and the adrenaline rush. He didn't even hesitate as he saw you fall into the river from the low bridge, he just, illogically and irrationally jumped in with you.

"I think,"

"I found your brother's ball!"

You scream, not hearing the end of Kita's sentence but you turn and see his face, giving a shocked smile and you swear, flushed cheeks. Maybe he was a bit burnt but you knew Kita never forgot to apply sunscreen.

"Sorry, what did you say?" You give a sheepish smile and he just gives a small smile however you see his eyes are relieved yet a bit sad. Despite Kita appearing sometimes as a robot, he was sweet and you could, sort of, understand him at times.

"Don't worry about it, let's get the ball." He says kindly and you can't help but notice his small laugh before he swims to the shore, where the shiny red pokeball is.

#hq #hq imagines #haikyuu #kita #kita shinsuke #fanfic #ahhh #sweet #fluff #i'm finally posting all my drafts #sorry for the absence #i went back to the uk for christmas holidays hell yeahh

[tonytonwy]

Pleased to see me?

summary: a sequel to 'people pleaser', a time-skip into the future where you and Futakuchi are, finally, together.

You're humming a song on the balcony when you get attacked, two long arms wrapping themselves around you. You don't even bother to look and instead continue hanging your clothes and Futakuchi's work clothes.

"How are you feeling?" He groans into your shoulder and tightly hugs you, making your back slightly crack.

"Hungover," he lightly kisses your neck, feeling ticklish with his soft hair touching you, "I didn't even drink that much."

"Well, you clearly don't remember doing a shot competition with Kamasaki."

"I remember winning," his comment makes you laugh as you clip your underwear onto the wire. Futakuchi walks, more like limps, to your outdoor chair and essentially falls on it, not noticing the hot coffee next to it.

"I remember a drunk phone call and picking up a drunk man," you say, giving a grin as he stretches and nods. "And said drunk man attacking me with kisses.

He gives his classic grin. It's cocky, arrogant and you want to kiss it.

"I would hardly call it an attack if you were so into it," you gasp.

"You have zero proof."

"The hickey," he pulls down his t-shirt to show a purple, and rather big, hickey on his collarbone, "right here, is great evidence."

"Anyone could've done that," he laughs at your comment, suddenly noticing your coffee and drinking it, making a face over it's bitterness. "Hey, that's mine."

"What happened to tu casa, es mi casa? Also, add more sugar to your coffee, you psycho."

"It's the other way around, mi casa es su casa." You laugh as his face drops, he hated when you corrected him on 'stupid stuff that...'

"Whatever, only nerds know how to say shit correctly."

After being together for almost 6 years, you could essentially read his mind. Futakuchi bathes in the soft sunlight, the warmth feeling nice on his face. It reminds you of school for some reason, you feel nostalgic as you remember highschool. You and Futakuchi going to the beach despite his complaints of how hot it was and how summer sucks.

"Do you remember how we got together?" He snorts, opening his eyes to look at you, serious and stoic.

"Of course, you were undeniably in love with me and confessed to me immediately," your shocked face makes him laugh before you throw a wet shirt to his face.

"I hate you," you catch it as he throws the shirt back and you hang it angrily.

"And I still love you," he says, despite his teasing nature, the words were genuine and rare. Futakuchi preferred to show his affection through actions so you felt your face heat up as he says that sentence. "What? Cat got your tongue."

Ah, but he was still a dick. He sighs and looks outside, grandmas getting their exercise, kids playing hopscotch, mums catching up. He wanted to be in bed with you a bit longer, you were his heater after all.

"Well, from my amazing memory, you snooped around my room while I was getting us snacks and you found my stupid love letter." He grumbles, cheeks slightly red.

"I was not snooping!" You laugh at his outrageous allegations, "you told me to get your notebook which was 'somewhere on your desk'. I didn't think that a love letter would be in your drawer."

"Well, the notebook was on my desk, you're just blind."

"Mhmm, that's weird, because I remembering perfectly reading the words 'to y/n, who one day I will talk to'." Futakuchi jumps up and puts his hand on your mouth, his face very red now.

"Shut up." You're laughing and lick his hand, he moves his hand quickly and pinches your cheek, he hates how it reminds him of his mum. "It's embarrassing."

He walks away, sulking on the chair as he folds his arms. You smile at his childishness, he really doesn't change.

"No, it's not." You walk towards Futakuchi and sit on his lap sideways, his eyes turning to yours while his hand grabs your outer thigh, creeping to your butt. "I'm so glad I found that letter."

"Really?" His voice is again genuine and you remember why you love Futakuchi Kenji; despite his superficial confidence and overall asshole-ness, he still desired reassurance and love just like anyone else.

"Of course," you lean in, letting your nose graze his softly, "If I had never found it, who phone would you call at 2am when you're drunk?"

"Your mum's probably," your face drops and you walk off as he laughs at his own horrible joke.

"You're horrible," you try to hide your smile as he creeps up and helps you hang the clothes.

Futakuchi whistles a song in the kitchen, making pancakes as you do a deep clean in living room, wiping every surface with dust on it. His headache is almost gone after the strong coffee, medicine and much needed water, all thanks to your nagging 'it'll get worse if you don't take it!"

A smile appears as he thinks of you. He flips a pancake successfully, letting it softly sizzle. He stays at your apartment every weekend as he's busy during the week with work and volleyball but it wasn't enough for him. He wanted to wake up with you next to him, dinner felt so lonely without you there, he wondered what started this sudden need of wanting to live with you.

"I can't believe you still aren't living with her, you're already 23." Kamasaki says, slurring his words. Futakuchi just clicks his tongue in annoyance.

"What's wrong with having our own spaces?"

"Someone is gonna scoop her up, at work or at a bar," Kamasaki says, as if he's a wise monk, sipping his water. "She's probably waiting for you to ask."

"My lease is ending soon," he hums as Kamasaki orders 6 more shots of vodka while Aone & Koganegawa are already asleep.

You smell the sweet pancakes and lean your head to the kitchen, where your boyfriend is in his own thoughts, looking outside. He's wearing the stupid green shirt that just says, 'I'm good in bed, I can sleep all day' and black boxers that have a white text saying 'Let's speedrun sex'. You remember his disgusted face when he received those gifts and his annoyed voice saying 'what a useless gift'. You can't help but snort at his terrible lies and how he ends up using those boxers over his Calvin Klein any day.

"We should move in together," you raise a brow at his random suggestion, he just turns, giving you a nonchalant look, "what?"

"We basically already are with how often you visit," you laugh, sitting at the dinning table, looking at your phone ring with your friend's messages

"Who's that?" Futakuchi asks fast, and while he knows it just your friends complaining how they can't find a decent man, he lives to bother you.

"My side-chicks," you give a side glance and see how Futakuchi nods his head, his face unbothered.

"Damn, I'm fucking starving. Good thing I made all these pancakes for me, and me only."

"Oh my god, you little shit," you laugh at his childness and run to the kitchen where he is, giving him a low hug. Futakuchi tries to remove last night's images from his head, however if getting a boner was an Olympic sport, he would be getting gold. "Don't be like that, you're my favourite side-chick, Kenji."

"I hate you." He tries to not smile as you hug harder, making it harder to balance the twelve pancakes on his plate.

You're both on your comfy velvet couch, it wasn't really comfy but you insisted that it was cheap and long enough for Futakuchi's 'freakishly long legs'. An ad appears for a perfume, a grey-haired model performing, what appears, heart surgery.

"If you look into the heart, you'll see Lev Haiba's Heartless."

"That's gotta be one of the worst perfume ads in history." Futakuchi snorts with you, your head laying on his shoulder.

"If you looked into my heart, it would just be you," you're almost in shock to hear those words come out of Futakuchi's mouth.

“That’s so cringey” you start laughing, loudly and it reminds Futakuchi of highschool, when you hanged out with Mai and would laugh loudly. However, he decides to just tackle you on the sofa, he’s body on top of yours as you continue to laugh and heave. He starts tickling you, first attacking your ribs.

“So mean to me, y/n," his hands are tickling your sides while his mouth is right under your ear, fanning your neck. You can’t stop squealing and he pinches your butt before ticking your inner thigh, your vital weak point.

“Stop stop stop,” you plead, tears threatening to come out as you continue to laugh.

He feels a sense of deja-vu, as if this has happened before.

“What’s the safe word?” He says

“Oh my god, please stop,” you kick him on the side and it almost annoys you how he laughs at your attempt to kick him.

"Nope. I'm pretty sure we used it last night," his evil smiles come out.

"I hate you," he stops as he looks into your eyes, a devilish glint coming out. His arms resting on your boobs like he's 17 again.

"No, you don't." You give a stupid smile before giving him a quick kiss.

"No, I don't."

He won’t tell you about the fact that he bought a new apartment, right in the middle between his work and yours, how it's animal-friendly and how there's a spare room for his annoying mum. It was a tough choice, an apartment or a ring but he needs to know if you'll still love him after seeing his way of folding clothes.

Maybe he’ll tell you on the trip you two are going on soon for your 6-year-anniversary.

#futakuchi x reader #hq futakuchi #futakuchi kenji #haikyuu #holy shit #been editing this for the past months #but I'm in love with this man #AHH thank you for reading:)

[tonytonwy]

a change in ritual

kita s. x f!reader

summary: where you reminisce on your exchange in Japan and how you inevitably fell in love with Kita Shinsuke.

Somewhere in the world, early in the morning.

"Jeez y/n, you really need a good routine!" Your friend scolds you as you huff, just making it in time before the doors shut. You lower the volume on your phone; ABBA's great singing become background noise as your friend makes her usual disappointed face. You really needed to stop waking up in the last ten minutes of the morning before you had to run, you were in your last year of high school for god sakes. "Have you ever actually had a planned routine in the morning?"

Her question is as sarcastic as ever, rightfully annoyed with the amount of times you've slept in but it immediately reminds you of a certain boy with silver hair, soft brown eyes and dewy skin, a devoted grandma who adored you as if you were her own blood, a time where you were young and stupid, however not stupid enough to kiss a boy.

"I'll have you know," you say with pride and fondness, "during my exchange in Japan, I had a really good routine over there."

"Right, the same exchange trip where you fell in love?" Her smile is smug and you act like you've been metaphorically shot. It was an amazing experiences with a lot of a small regrets. I wish I had done that, this, and more. You got over those regrets with time however, the small mourning of an experience you could've had comes every now and then. Even after three years, you can say confidently you've never truly forgotten those bittersweet memories.

"And I hate that I ever told you that." Your friend laughs loudly in the compact train, ignoring every glare towards you two.

"Tell me the story again, I seriously love making fun of your boring, awful, no-fun choices."

Somewhere in Hyōgo prefecture, late in the evening.

"Has yer routine ever been drastically changed?" Kita looks to orange sky filled with purple hues, deep in thought over Aran's question as they walk together. Their walks became less talking and more 'interviewing Kita Shinsuke', which he didn't mind, it was great bonding. "Because I feel like nothing could change yer ritual."

Kita gives a small smile, nostalgia filling his head.

"Yes," Kita adjusts his bag, trying to hide the smallest blush on his cheeks, "in the second year of middle school, my routine was quite different to now."

After being with Mr Perfect for three years, Aran could read him a bit better now.

"Tell me," Aran leans in, "did something magical happen in middle school to our captain?"

"Something like that, it was all due to my grandma really." Kita says fondly, "like always."

Somewhere in Hyōgo prefecture, three years ago, February.

You were meant to stay with a loving couple whose son was in Tokyo studying. Keyword; meant to. However, as the gods would intend, things changed, and quickly. 2 days into the exchange and their son decided to move back after hating Tokyo and with no space left, they asked Granny Yumie if she could take you for 6 months. With the programs' and your permission of course, and you were 14, you weren't going to speak up about an issue at all.

"Naturally, 14 is the age of cowards." You glare as your friend interrupts your story before shutting up again.

You felt indebted to Yumie as she gave a big smile and welcomed you into her home as if you were another Kita. You remember meeting Shinsuke perfectly, in the most awkward, 14-year old way. It was a Sunday morning when you entered the old yet cozy house, nervously walking in your 'Anpan Man' socks.

You bump into him as you try to find your room, meeting at a corner. Your foreheads colliding as you drop your bags and you rub your forehead. You were similar heights back then, however you can't help but wonder if he's grown much, is he still a similar height? taller than you? maybe even shorter?

"We love short kings."

"Shut up!"

"I'm so sorry," he appears to have forgotten his pain as his intense eyes just bore into yours, hints of worriedness and embarrassment in them. As his face leans in, you can't help but feel more bashful as you see those brown eyes stare at you, or more like at the red spot on your forehead.

"No, no, it's my fault!" You say in English, too worried to speak Japanese. You scramble back up before he softly moves your hair out of your face however stops and gives a small glance.

"May I?" you can only nod, closing your eyes as he softly touches the bump forming. You don't know where this prince came from but you weren't sure if your heart could handle living him. You both jolt as Yumie appears, right next to you.

"Ah, Shin-chan, yer back already," Yumie says cheerfully, "I see ya met y/n-chan."

"Yes, we've had a small accident though," he's still touching your head and you only hope your face isn't too red for him to notice.

"Ah, colliding heads already? Here I thought ya two would along great." She says while giving a small laugh, also moving your hair away to check the bump.

"I'm fine honestly, some ice and it'll go away." You say while giving a sheepish smile, you didn't want be a bother.

"Water?" They both say, confused before you now feel your face noticeably heat up as you messed up. You quickly realize had forgotten the word for ice in Japanese.

"Ah, cold water?" you question, feeling like an idiot. You see how Shinsuke gives a small smile, humour in his eyes over your cute mistake.

"Ah, Ice, Kōri." His English pronunciation is essentially perfect and you feel a sense of relief as at least you had him as a helper in case you didn't understand something.

"Please write a fanfic over your life."

"The Suzuki's are gettin' an exchange student today, she's meant to arrive soon."

Kita himself remembers the day you arrive perfectly. He was walking with his grandma and his sister around the fruit produce section in the grocery store. He nods at his grandma's words, she always knew the latest information in the town.

"Ah, an exchange student comin' to Hyōgo?" His sister ponders, twirling her hair, her confidence growing as a new high school student at Fueneku. "That's strange."

"Well, speak of the devil," his eyes whip to where his grandma is pointing at, you with the Suzuki's, smiling and bowing as they buy food. You're wearing a loose t-shirt with a black puffer jacket, jeans and some black boots. Your hair is slightly damp and cheeks flushed with the sudden rain that arrived to the town.

He was not one to stare but he can't help it, it's not because you're a foreigner. He honestly is not sure why his eyes can't leave you but your smile must be one of the reasons as you give a big smile to the host family. The Suzuki's laugh at something you say, making you blush profusely, you must've messed up a Japanese word, Kita stupidly wonders what you could've said that was so funny.

"Did you find out what she said?"

"Apparently when they asked her what activities she wanted to do, she said Baikingu instead of Saikuringu."

"Well, she sure is pretty, right Granny?" His sister subtly points to her brother as both women look at his 'awed' face. Yumie nods, giving a big smile, she knew that look from anywhere. That was the same look her husband gave to her when they first met, the glance her son gave to her now daughter-in-law. She felt blessed by the gods to witness her grandson's lovestruck moment as Shinsuke slightly clenches his fists.

He had seen pretty girls, on television, in his middle school, even his classmates. But, there was just something about the air around you that made Kita want to know you better.

He wonders if you're going to be in his class.

"Why dontcha' talk to her Shin-chan?" Yumie lightly pushes her grandson, who fumbles before walking back behind Yumie, as if hiding behind his tiny grandma would hide his slightly pink cheeks.

"m' okay."

"Is that all?" Aran asks, clearly not impressed with the story.

"There is more," Kita says, trying to exactly remember everything in chronological order.

"I'm Kita Yurie, but feel free to call me Yuri. I'm 15 and my English isn't the best but I will try my best to make ya feel at home!" Kita mentally checks his sister's introduction; friendly, good information and cheerful ending. He just needed to do something similar or better.

"I'm Kita Shinsuke, I am 13, turning 14. My English is good so if ya have any questions, please ask me," he bows and feels his eyebrow slightly twitch when Yurie snorts.

"I'm Shōsuke! But ya can call me Shō, I'm 8! I think yer cute!" Kita chokes on his spit for a quick second, as does Yurie. You seem to understand what cute is in Japanese as you give an embarrassed laugh to his little brother's introduction.

"Love triangle?" You can only glare at your stupid friend and her stupid comments.

"You're disgusting."

"Thank you for the great introductions, uhm," you look to the ground before staring back at everyone, however your eye-contact with Shinsuke only lasting less than a second before you pull. You felt nervous, his gaze was quite intense and while you knew it wasn't a glare, you were scared to mess up your introduction.

"I'm l/n y/n, I'm turning 14 and thank you so much for everything. please treat me nicely," you bow and feel your breathe quicken with anxiety.

"Great introduction" Kita's voice cracks and he has a composed face but he wants to die as Yurie starts laughing. However, you just give him a smile, eyes grateful for his compliment.

"Oh my god, I can already hear yer sister's evil laugh."

"I know, it stays in yer head."

"Thank you, Shinsuke." You bow, your face heating up as you quickly realize you called him by his name and this is your 'first time' meeting. Kita tries to not blush as well, wondering if you did that on purpose.

It's Monday morning when Yurie lightly wakes you up, you barely slept from excitement of starting middle school in Japan. You check yourself out in Yurie’s long mirror; the sailor uniform, fresh and ironed perfectly. You walk to the dining room where everyone is having breakfast.

“Ah, sorry,” you sit down, next to Yurie and Shinsuke, who just shrug nonchalantly. You notice how upright he sits, and you subconsciously straighten your back.

“Don’t worry, dear. Sleep well?” Granny Yumie passes you plates of food, miso, rice, egg, and more. It’s almost overwhelming how much food she has given you but you notice how Shōsuke gobbles down his food, before his older brother tells him off.

“Uh, I was a bit excited so I’m not sure if I slept enough.” You yawn and she gives a small laugh, you notice how Kita is staring at you, like he wants to ask you something.

“Do ya like the miso?” You nod to Yurie, who gives a smug look to Shinsuke. You bring the warm miso to your face, inhaling the strong smell and steam. He quietly eats his natto, he wonders if he should cook miso soup more often.

“It smells delicious,” you notice the white blocks and Shinsuke smiles as he sees yours eyes brighten. “Oh my god, I love tofu.”

“I’ll show ya around Fueneko, it’s not too big so I don’t think you’ll get lost.” You slightly jolt as he talks, his voice somewhat deep with sleep and a morning fruitiness that makes you feel warm. The uniform pants are big on him, he still needs to grow into it but the white sleeves are rolled up, revealing lean muscle of a new teenager. You wonder if he plays any sports, what’s the uniform like on him, could you watch any of his games?

“Are we in the same class?,” you say while eating the soft, cushiony egg, “I would love to have a friend in my first class.”

“Let’s hope,” his soft smile reminds you of the rice paddies on a sunny day.

The three of you walk quietly, Yurie in the middle as she asks you a million questions about your country, culture, and customs. You try to answer the best way however she would occasionally correct your Japanese, Shinsuke seems content with just listening.

“Well, this is my stop,” you look in awe at the highschool, the metal gates thick and slightly old. “If Shin-chan does anything disrespectful, immediately tell me!”

Shinsuke gives a deadpan stare to his sister, who just laughs. He was used to his sister’s teasing by now, it was nothing new. However, it annoyed him when you were there to witness his pain.

“I’m sure he’ll be fine,” you say while laughing, waving bye to Yurie.

You both walk, together but there is an air of awkwardness, a tension that isn’t quite describable. You’re not sure what to say, to ask or to do however, you decide to mutter something, anything at this point.

"What songs do you like?"

“Do you have any worries?”

You both stare at each other for a second before you both laugh, walking past the river, full of rain water and ducks enjoying the rare February sun.

“Sorry,” he says instinctively, he should’ve guessed you were going to say something

“No, it’s completely fine! Honestly, please feel more relaxed around me, Kita.” He lets his shoulder down, not realising how tense he was before. You avoid a puddle, slightly going in his way. “So, what songs do you like?”

He’s never really thought of it, music. He knows his grandma loves singing a few songs while cleaning but it felt more like white noise than anything else.

"I listen to anythin’ on the radio but I really like 'Sukiyaki' by Kyu Sakamoto." It was one of the most famous songs in Japan, he couldn’t go wrong with that answer.

"Is it an old song?" He feels his cheeks slightly heat up in embarrassment, ah, he forgot how ancient it was.

"Yeah, do ya dislike old songs?" You shake your head violently, giving a worried face.

"I love old songs! Have you heard of ABBA?" He shakes his head in subtle regret, his grandma liked a few of their songs but he had never actually heard one of their songs.

You get your headphones out, hesitantly passing it to Kita. "Would you like to listen to one of their songs? I promise it's good."

He hopes you don't notice the slight shake in his hands when you pass it to him. You hope he doesn't notice your loud heartbeat and red face as your fingers slightly touch with his.

He likes the guitar at the beginning, the singer's voice is soothing against the piano. He thinks the scenery of Hyogo fits the song, cheerful with a soft piano, it seems like a song his Grandma would like. He suddenly wishes he knew an instrument, do you play any instruments? Would he be more cool in your eyes if he played the guitar?

You side-eye him, wondering if this song was good enough to show him. He looks at stoic as ever but as the singer reaches a high pitch, you see his eyes slightly shine.

Ah, so he can make those faces as well.

Kita Shinsuke was never incredibly fond of music but as the beat drops, he feels the need to sing. He sees how you can't help yourself as you softly sing the lyrics while nodding your head, staring at the scenery of Hyōgo. Your hands tightly holding your school bag, however your fingers playing the notes.

He thinks you're gorgeous.

He feels his own head bobbing to the beat, his fingers moving with the clear piano's beats and his heart slightly beating faster as he has this quiet realization.

"This is my favourite part," you say as the song comes to and end and the piano's tune becomes louder. He can't help but smile at your goofiness as you act you're the one playing piano. His head nods along, staring at Fueneko Middle School from afar, he feels a sense of disappoint begin in his stomach, he swears the walk is usually longer.

"Did you like it?" Your voice is uneasy, you knew ABBA wasn’t everyone’s cup of tea but you had hope that Kita somehow likes them.

He's so close to saying something stupid like I like your voice singing it or I like it but your imaginary piano skills more or simply you're pretty, your smile, cheeks, laugh are so pretty, it beats any song.

But Kita isn't stupid, he's a rational 13-year old boy.

"Pretty." You were unaware of Kita’s 14-year-old heartbeat thumping, however he was just as oblivious to your red ears. You almost forget he's talking about the song and not you.

Okay, he's a bit stupid sometimes.

"Okay, it's your turn now, tell me a song," you lean to him, showing your phone. He freaks out, in all honesty, he has zero knowledge of music and wonders how he can surprise you. You try to not overthink your choices, were you leaning too much? Was he uncomfortable? Maybe he wanted you to go away before his friend came?

“Kita!” You both turn, seeing a boy with a shaved head, waving his arm frantically while jogging towards you guys. He’s tall and got a big smile to his face and while he is classically handsome, you immediately think, but Kita is more handsome.

“Who’s he?”

“My captain,” you nod your head, “I play volleyball.”

“Ah, how cool.” Your compliment makes him want to play a match just so you can see how cool he looks, he wants to receive a hard spike. Kita knew that the process was more important that results but he wanted to show you his hard work. He’s not sure he’s ever felt this proud over a simple compliment. Kita Shinsuke was confident, but not an attention seeker ever.

However, he really wants your attention on him.

Your head already imagines it, Kita in his uniform, waving at you from the court. You try to not romanticise the idea of it, of living with a handsome boy who’s your age, but it’s kind-of impossible.

You feel excited for the next few months.

He feels lucky, that he’s the one to show everything about Japan.

Present time

“Wow," Aran sounds shocked, "I can't believe ya experienced that, I’m kinda jealous."

"It was," he almost struggles to find the correct word, "simply amazin’, it's very nostalgic talkin’ about her."

"Yeah, what did it feel like? Being with her?" This conversation disproves every ‘Kita is a robot’ theory as Aran notices Kita’s eye crinkle with something new, different, maybe some sadness? Aran isn’t too sure himself.

"It just felt good, as if all the perseverance, and diligence I had done were accomplished with just talking to her. Helpin’ her felt like I had done all my chores and ticked all my checklists."

“It sounds like right person, wrong time. But damn, not even a subtle confession?" Aran whistles, it was a bit of a disappointing story, after all, from all the J-dramas he’s watched with his mum, the confession scene is one of the most anticipated and adored moments of a show.

"No," Kita plays with the strap of his gym bag, "unfortunately not."

"Well" Aran puts a hand on Kita’s shoulders, “you never know when she’ll appear!”

Kita smiles, looking at the sunset go down, he wonders if his sister still has your information. While he agreed with Inarizaki’s flag, we don’t need the memories; for looking forward, with your head up high into the future was always the best choice.

He couldn’t help but reminisce the memories he had with you.

"I still can't believe you didn't kiss him!" Your friend groans, as if she didn't know the outcome of the story you've told her like 10 times already. "Surely more stuff happened, right?"

"What do you mean by that?" You ask, feeling your heart race and face warm up.

"Not like that idiot!" Your friend laughs again, "you've only told me this story though, and you lived with him for 6 months."

"Ah," your smile is dead giveaway and before she can ask any questions, you look away, "Yeah, I have more stories."

"Well, come on," you guys walk out of the station, the cold air hitting your faces. The tip of your nose immediately being covered by your scarf.

"I need to be drunk to tell you more stories," your friend laughs before lightly pushing you. You were grateful she wasn't too pushy about Kita, after all, talking about him felt like an intimate story in itself. He wasn't someone you wanted to brag about nor bring the spotlight to. He was someone you whispered about, as if afraid to forget the memories with him, someone you held close to your heart despite the fact it has been 4 years. You thought that memories were something that everyone needed; it’s a reminder of hard times, unforgettable moments and unique experiences.

"Well, give me a hint, feed my imagination a bit."

"Mhmm, well I could tell you about when we fell into a lake together," you see how her face drops, "or when stayed up late and just looked at the stars, or maybe-"

"Okay, how does this Friday sound?"

note: AH I LOVE THIS MAN smmmm, i have so many ideas for this trope or au, maybe other characters, i wanna thank for the amazing inspo from a great mutual:))) who wants to remain anonymous but you know who you are.

#kita shinsuke #he has my heart #haikyuu #haikyuu!! #x reader #fanfic #fluff #like always #i'll probably edit this again hahaha

[tonytonwy]

It's 2am and I want to kiss you

iwaizumi x f!reader

summary: American frat parties aren't too bad with a hot guy.

You stumble on the balcony, letting your legs hang between the white pillars of the famous frat building. You let your drowsy head lean on the cool stone, taking a deep breath. 19 years into your life and you still couldn't control your alcohol. You take notice of the plastic yellow bucket and bottles of water in the corner and laugh, at least they were prepared this time. You feel your bra dig into your ribcage, your jeans tight against your stomach and you remember why you hate dressing up.

You also remember why you hate parties. Everyone is vomiting, your friends with their other friends and you're here, outside in the cold air. You feel a beep in your pocket and quickly check.

guyss he's taking me to his room, hope this dick is good aye.

You snort, and quickly type pls use protection, taking notice of the time; somehow 2:01 already. You loved your friends, you really did, but sometimes the relentless jealousy would rise up. They had boyfriends, girlfriends and experiences you never had. You wanted to have those stories, those stupid regrettable stories you would tell your kids one day.

"Oh, sorry. I didn't know someone was here." You hear a nice voice behind you ask. You nod, looking at the night view of Birtwhistle University, small lights of thousands of building decorating the dark night. You decide to throw your wallowing pity away for another night. "You okay?"

"M' okay. Just letting the air hit my face a bit," you sigh deeply, the cool air going through your body. "Had one too many sohju shots."

"Ah, been there," his accent makes your eyes widen as you look back and see a familiar face, Iwaizumi, who lives in the same exchange building as you, actually right next to you. He was known, for being the quiet and incredibly hot exchange student basically. Iwaizumi is leaning on the doorframe, his eyes closed, enjoying the soft breeze, a glass bottle of apple cider in his hands. He's wearing a grey hoodie with matching shorts and a par of slides, you wish you had his comfort.

You've said 'hi' countless times as you pass each other in halls, libraries and classes and you even helped him with an English quiz but you've never actually fully spoken to him.

In your fantasies? Now that's a different story.

"Ah, Hajime? Oh sorry, Iwaizumi, right?" He gives a small smile and nods, you notice how his cheeks are flushed and you're glad you're not the only one a bit fucked tonight.

"Yeah, I'm used to being called Hajime though," you nod, wondering if you should use your Japanese class to it's potential.

"Feel free to sit," you pat the spot next to you. You quickly realize why you drink at parties, your shy exterior is peeled off to show someone who can be just as fun as her friends. You're not quiet, awkward or easily embarrassed when the alcohol runs through your body. You turn and see his eyes widen and the tip of his ears get pink. He nods and hesitantly sits next to you, his legs hanging next to yours and thighs touching. You can't help but peak at his muscular thighs, defined and tough muscle ripping through the soft grey fabric.

God, this man was built like a true Greek god.

You didn't really consider yourself someone openly horny, and perhaps it is due to the alcohol, but Iwaizumi is just about one of the hottest men you've seen in your life. Maybe it was his respectable energy, or his weird obsession with Godzilla-themed items. His arms definitely had something to do with it. You weren’t sure but the amount of times you were in the gym with him coincidentally there (5 so far) made you realize how badly you wanted to make out with Iwaizumi.

"You liking America?" He asks, his voice slightly slurring however still deep and rumbling through his throat.

"It's okay, it's not as bad as I thought it'd be. However, it’s only been two weeks so," your comment makes him laugh and it's fruity yet deep in his chest. You chuckle, the drunk honesty flowing through your veins. If he asked you, ‘y/n do you find me hot and if so, do you wanna kiss?’ you would wholeheartedly answer back ‘why yes Iwaizumi, I’ve been waiting to smash my lips against yours and to touch your arms at least once.'

“I have to agree with you, it’s not too bad with you here,” he laughs, clearly the cider starting to have it's delayed effect. You reminisce on his words, the back of your neck suddenly feeling very warm. The air feels drunk and maybe it’s in your alcohol-influenced head or your Iwaizumi-infected heart but maybe, just maybe, he could be flirty.

"You a heavy weight, Iwaizumi?” You ask, this may be the only time you actually talk with him so you plan to enjoy every second of it.

“Good question,” he slightly leans into you and you’re not sure if he’s a sleepy drunk or impossibly flirty, however it appears to be more the latter. “Yes, everyday.”

You try to not laugh as he completely misheard what you said but you honestly can't be bothered asking again.

"What's your favourite memory from childhood?" His head lays on your shoulder, you can feel his hair on your collarbone, it's almost ticklish as Iwaizumi hums a tune you can't quite figure out. He whips out his phone, and you can't see what he's doing before showing you a picture of him as a kid. He has a paper hat, a stick and he's on top of a man, you only assume it's his dad.

"I liked catching cicadas and freaking my mum out with it," you laugh as he says this because you realize that the photo has zero correlation with this story. You were getting to know him better, Iwaizumi wasn't just a simple hot guy built like Achilles. He was a boy who did goofy things, like terrorize his mother with bugs and use his dad as a horse for photos.

"Did you kill them?"

"Nah," you realize the song he's humming is 'Party in the U.S.A' by Miley Cyrus. "They have a short lifespan so I let them live."

"How noble," before you can ask another question, his drunk face stares at you, deep in thought over probably nothing.

"Why did you come to America?" You tilt your head, slightly confused over his question. His ears go slightly red as he looks away, eyes glued to the big trees. "I overheard you talking about how you should've gone to Japan instead of America."

You felt embarrassed, cheeks heating up more with his eyes on you, however you take a deep breath.

"Do you want the honest," you tip your drink with his to clink, "drunk truth?"

"Is there any better kind?" He clinks his drink with yours, smiling. God, he smelt good, the sweet cider bubbling through a soft cologne that reminds you of freshwater river weirdly enough.

"I got a scholarship, I entered on a whim and got accepted. Plus, my friends really wanted come here," you say, slight sadness running through your voice. Oh god, here comes the emotions. "I didn't want to be the party pooper to say no, so…”

"Here you are, with me," he says, almost breathless. His star-struck eyes stuck on yours and you realize, holy shit, you are talking to Iwaizumi Hajime. The guy you've been thirsting over for the past two weeks, the guy who helped you when your books dropped all over the floor. The guy who apparently just stares at you sometimes.

"Why don't you talk to him?" Your friend slightly nudges you, smirking.

"Are you kidding? He's too hot to approach," you sigh, walking past the lounge room where he's playing Mario Kart with some friends, clearly a life-or-death situation with how loud they are. You can't help but let a smile escape as you see Iwaizumi's toothy grin as he wins, lifting his muscular arms up in glory and triumph.

"Oh, come on, y/n," your other friend groans, "we keep telling you he just sometimes stares at you, as if he wants to talk to you."

"And I keep telling you that you're getting my hopes up for nothing!"

"Here I am, with you," you give a small smile. Perhaps coming to America wasn't such a bad idea. You lean back, ignoring how his eyes slightly ogle at your chest. Your hand is dangerously close to his much bigger hand. You try to hide the loud thump in your heart as Iwaizumi puts his hands on top of yours. You whip your eyes to his soft, olive green eyes, slowly sobering up with each enamored second he's with you.

Okay, this is happening. You thank whatever God that allowed you to have this moment. This experience of a lifetime, you can already imagine it.

"I cured cancer and diabetes!"

"Oh yeah? Well, I got to hold hands with Iwaizumi Hajime!"

"I can't believe I am talking to you," he says, suddenly laying on the floor, looking at the stars in disbelief, his hands hiding his sudden red face. You try to hide your disappointment as his warm sturdy hands are no longer on you. His hoodie slightly lifting, revealing a six-pack that you know you will never forget.

"What do you mean? I should be saying that to you" You say laughing, deciding to lay next him. The stars are slightly dimmed by the house's lights but still look mesmerizing. You wonder what good deed you did in your past life for this to happen, for a hot guy like Iwaizumi to approach you.

"I always found you interesting." You turn and give him a look of disbelief. He stammers, clearly seeing the error in his words.

"Interesting to look at?" You let out a laugh as his face reddens, he stubbornly groans.

"No, of course not. I just, liked looking at you."

"Iwaizumi," You laugh, his words making zero sense in your head, "What happened to the honest drunk truth?"

He huffs, almost like he's mad, cheeks still red.

"You would do anything for your friends, I could tell you were that type of person. You helped me with that stupid quiz even though I made you stay up until midnight to teach me stupid English. And you're so pretty," His rambling makes your stomach feel warm, your lips shake with how much he's noticed you. Your mouth is open in shock, you never thought anyone had noticed you, not in that way. Why would anyone notice you? You thought of yourself as plain, boring and awkward.

"My shitty friend from Japan told me to just get drunk and do it. But I really couldn't find the bravery to talk to you." Iwaizumi sits up and seems out of breath when he finishes. He's not looking at you, ears burning with embarrassment. God, he's shy and hot.

"Until now," you also sit up with him, eyes staring at him. You give a small smile and lay your hands on his, maybe this was the adrenaline feeling your friends were looking for when they did dumb things. This sudden boost of euphoria and excited nerves over a new experience, over a story for the future.

“Until now.” He gives a bashful smile, clearly expecting you to be disgusted with his 'drunk truth'. “And now I’m here.”

“You’re here, with me,” you say, both softly laughing. You feel Iwaizumi lay his head on your shoulder, however this time it feels heavier

"y/n?" His voice sounds so soothing, saying your name casually.

"Yeah?"

"I think I moved around too much and too fast," you know that face too well as Iwaizumi puts a hand to his mouth. "I'm gonna throw up," your eyes widen but you act on pure instinct and experience as bring the bucket just in time as he hurls. Your friends were messy drunks, not to say you didn't have your share of vomiting stories. You quickly turn to get a bottle of water.

"What happened to being a heavy weight?" You smile, rubbing his back, you can see how he frowns confused before widening his eyes.

"I meant," he chugs the water bottle, his frown slowing going away, "lifting heavy weights."

"Oh," you can't help but laugh as Iwaizumi gives you a soft smile before laughing with you.

You hear the loud knocks and groan loudly, your head heavy and legs glued to the bed. You somehow find the strength to walk to your door and open it.

You see Iwaizumi with a pair of glasses and two coffees. He's wearing sweatpants with the same hoodie from last night.

"I'm so sorry," you smile as you see his cheeks heat up in embarrassment. "I am so sorry you had to watch me puke, clean my face and drop my sleeping corpse to my room."

You laugh while taking a coffee as Iwaizumi leans on your doorframe, to hungover to fully use his legs.

"Yeah, you owe me big time, heavy weight." He tilts his head, giving a small glare over his new nickname, small smile still escaping through.

"Coffee isn't enough?"

"Ha! You wish," you take a sip and give a sigh of relief as you feel the warm drink energize every joint, muscle and bone in your body. "I expect a Japanese tutor now, at least."

"Done deal, also," he nervously rubs his neck, "I've got tickets for King Kong versus Godzilla, if you wanna come."

You scrunch your face, giving a deep thought.

"Well, I'll go since it's obvious that King Kong will win," you try to not laugh as Iwaizumi lowers his glasses, glaring at you. You feel you can read his mind as he's probably trying to remember every counter argument he can think of.

"Never mind, forget I even asked."

Notes: Did i write the 'helping iwaizumi with english' drabble but then decided to expand on this instead?? yes???? do i love the idea that iwaizumi is a late bloomer?? yes.yes.yes

however, I feel this fic hasn't achieved it's true potential (anyone get that reference?) so I'll probably do some minor editing here and there:)) I do that with all my fics tehehehe

#iwaizumi hajime #his arms #i dream DAILY of him #haikyuu #haikyuu!! #x reader #fanfic #fluff #post-time skip sorta? #I was so tempted to do 'and then you woke up' #for shits and giggles #but a mutual said that that's the worst idea ever #but it's kinda funny yaknow #kita coming soon promise

[tonytonwy]

i love you people who hold doors i love you people who let others pass on the driveway i love you people who make funny faces at babies i love you people who pick up litter i love you people who say please and thank you i love you people patient with service workers i love you people who share an umbrella i love you people who are casually kind

#kita... #lowkey #my heart

[tonytonwy]

#what being bi is like

Porco Rosso (1992) / Cowboy Bebop (2001)

#love it

[tonytonwy]

𝐍𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐥 𝐌𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐫 — 600's milestone event — press start

#sunflower: Who doesn't love a good visual novel game? Decide your own character's path, develop your relations, get to know your love interests, explore the plot to its most. Now, imagine if you could have a visual novel customized especially for you, with your favorite fandom included? Well, I'm here to help that come true with this small blog event. Press start, and let's enjoy the game together!

Settings:

🎮— This is an sfw event, with 20 slots to be filled with requests. Followers will have a preference in the line, and moots already have saved special slots to join.

🎮— Fandoms included: Haikyuu!!, Tokyo Revengers, Jujutsu Kaisen, Kuroko no Basket and Kimetsu no Yaiba.

🎮— To participate, fill out the Customization forms. Every detail will be there. Any questions, additions, or suggestions, feel free to go to my askbox.

🎮— The final result would be a trailer (video) of your visual novel, including a summary and at least four love interests to the trama, based on your choices.

🎮— I'll be working on the requests during September, so please be patient. The deadline for requests is September 6th.

Be creative, choose carefully, and I'll see you in the game! 💕

Reblogs are aprecciated 🥰

load before quitting? yes_ no_

#amazing idea!!

[tonytonwy]

why do all my drabbles end up being fics FUCK this happened with both futakuchi fics rip my sleep

I CANTTT i could just post a section of the kita and iwaizumi fic but nahh you need that lead up honestlyyy

#fr i was just editing #and suddenly wanted to add more to the kita drabble #and boom #2k words later HAHAAH whoops #tony rants #haikyuu!! #x reader #fanfic #haikyuu

[tonytonwy]

BROO IM BEGGING YOUUU a drabble, two paragraphs max I NEED SOMETHINF

I’m re-reading your fics like they’re a drug😭😭 I NEED HELPP AND YOUR FICS ARE THE ONLY THING that can help my sane brain!!😮‍💨😮‍💨

I will literally pay you money, I just need something, I’ve begged my friends to send you a message to inspire you but they’re cowards.

ANYWAYS PLEASE CONTINUE WRITING QUEEN IDC ANYRHING PLS🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹

I AM ACTUALLY LOSING IT 🤣😭 not this being a threat,, I’m so sorry my writing has caused you pain HAHAHA as for your friends hiiii I’m friendly so honestly talk to me abt anythinggg currently catching up to mha and sxf…

As for my writing,,,,,,,, KIDDING I’m trying to write a bit everyday especially for my no. 1 BABE Aone but damn it’s getting kinda hard, might try to write something else for a bit and then go back:)) but yeah we shallllll seeeeeee;)) pls have patience with me I swear I’m writing something

Little treat for y’all reading, I have two Drabble wips: a drunk Iwaizumi one and cute kita one… whoever sends me a message with one of their names,,,,,,,, I’ll post HAHAAH I thrive under pressure 🥹

#anon ask #have a feeling this is the same anon from the first one

[tonytonwy]

Pik-atsu ⚡ ϞϞ(๑ᵔ ․̫ ᵔ๑)∩ (insp)

[tonytonwy]

So i need help with names for Aone’s family,, specifically his siblings, so older sister and brother. What are y’all’s thoughts bc like for Takanobu has the Kanji’s for Tall and Stretch so idk if i should continue with that theme for his siblings orrr have all of them have t at the beginning orrr make it quite traditional, in the sense that Takanobu feels very masculine so his sister would have a very feminine. BUt idk so any help is appreciated:)))

#tony's asks #haikyuu #aone x reader #it's still wip #maybe next month?? #sorry hahaha

[tonytonwy]

I just wanna say I love your futakuchi fics so much omg I love the playlist and just AGH everything. 🥹🥹

You said you were thinking of writing Aone and omg that would literally make me scream into space likEEE I fucking love this man😭😭😭 do u mind sharing your ideas??👁👁

Plsss I love your writing, do an smau, drabble anything😗😗 I will consume anything you write 🤲🏻 or maybe a sequel to people pleaser? 😳😳 anYTHINGG any character tbh

I’m so shocked rn WUAHSJAHD omg thank you so much?? Sorry I couldn’t answer before, uni is literally taking all my time away😬

As for my Aone ficcc,, let’s just sayyyy you’re coworkers with a certain someone 😌😌 I don’t wanna spoil it too much;) but it’s a personal fav idea

I was thinking of an smau (maybe Iwaizumi🤫🤫) but we’ll see:) as for a sequel for people pleaser, I will definitely try to write Futakuchi more, I love him WUSHSHAHA🤧🤧 but yeah if u have any ideas just send them awayyy;) if I don’t answer, I probably couldn’t find the time or inspo to write it😭😭 BUT I will try my hardest

#anon ask #omg i can’t believe #my first ask #i wanna cry wuahfakpdcpisdf

[tonytonwy]

#i died😭😭 #so cute omg #i love dogs

[tonytonwy]

the sour moments of love

Summary: a prequel of ‘people pleaser’, where fate can’t stop Futakuchi from thinking about you.

a futakuchi kenji x f!reader

warning: awkward boners (barely mentioned but hey)

Shit.

His hands are sweaty out of nowhere, his heart feels heavy, and he wants to go to the toilet. The despicable feelings of love are back as he reads the class list, and his eyes stay stuck on one name specifically.

l/n y/n

He had never really heard of you before, he just had seen you in the courtyard with Mai, he figured you were her friend and that was the end of it. He noted how quiet you were with a group of people but in clear comfort with Mai, snorting and talking loudly. He had never spoken to you, but he felt an itch every time he walked past and heard you laugh.

He slowly noticed you more every day, your hair, body figure and even voice became highlighted in his mind. Whenever class got boring and he stared outside, you would be there, either with a heavy stack of paper or in the field, with your sports uniform. Going to the library? You were there studying and helping Mai.

He was noticing you more every day, and it was starting to drive him crazy.

“You gotta like someone, y/n!” His ear magically grows as the conversation peaks his interest and distaste. He slowly turns and sees how Mai is in your red face as you nervously shake your head. There was a cheery blossom petal stuck on the ends of your hair and he almost gets his hand out like an idiot. He doesn't mind spring, it gives him horrible hay fever but he likes how the cherry blossoms cover you from the strong sun.

“We haven’t even been in school for a month, how do you expect me to like someone so fast?” She’s pulling silly faces, not believing you, and you’re laughing, in that way that makes Futakuchi’s stomach cramp. He secretly hopes that you stay like that; not liking anyone and single. He knows it’s borderline creepy, just staring at what you two do at times.

Wow.

His eyes widen as he almost forgets how to breathe when you connect eyes with him. It was only a second but his heart twists and turns as you give a small smile before talking to Mai again, as if you didn’t just do that to him.

The fact that your attention is no longer on him leaves a bitter taste on his mouth. He hates bitter things, he clicks his tongue, annoyed, he felt like he was going into a losing battle.

He wasn’t sure how he felt about you, but you always left him irritated, slightly sweaty and nauseous. He didn’t dislike you, but he definitely hated the feelings that were in the bottom of his stomach whenever you were in his view.

If you walked past, his eyebrows naturally frowned more and he stopped breathing, as if intaking your smell was poisonous to his nose. All these feelings would arise in him and all he can do is glare.

"Futakuchi, you're scaring my friend," Mai folds her arms, her face clearly unhappy with him. He's putting nets away in the gym closet as Mai leans on the door.

"What?" Futakuchi turns and stares at Mai, bored and emotionless. They had gone to middle school together and she was no longer fazed by his natural 'resting-dick face'.

"Every time you walk past me and y/n, you look like you're gonna kill someone and y/n is too nice to say anything to me about it. Instead, she just has a scared face, like a baby deer." Mai sighs and Futakuchi's heart does a double beat as he realizes your name. He mentally hums, it suits you. He wonders how his name would sound like if you said it. Would it be soft like honey? O more of a teasing tone, he imagines that's how he would say your name.

"c'mon, y/n," his hands are tickling you while his mouth is right under your ear, fanning your neck. You're on his imaginary king bed -not his real lame single-, your school skirt hiking up as you squirm.

"Futakuchi," you say while laughing, "stop being mean!"

"Futakuchi!" His thoughts are interrupted by Mai's yelling, "that's exactly the face I'm talking about."

"That's not my problem," he walks to the changing rooms, neck starting to heat up. He lets the cold water run on his head, freezing every stupid thought he's had of you. He needed to never see you again, despite knowing that he would see you tomorrow and the day after that, until the end of the year.

How did he get a boner over such a small thing?

"I'm getting my snacks," he says, yawning and stretching his body. He wasn't sure why his mum liked going shopping so early, especially in summer, but if it got him free sour gummies so be it. He can already feel the sweat forming on his lower back, he instinctively frowns, he hates summer. He wonders if you dislike summer just as he does, he wonders if you go to the pool, do you usually need help with sunscreen.

His attempts to forget you go in vain, as he suspected.

"Get some for your sister!" His mum yells as she continues to look at the canned aisle. He scoffs, his sister slept in, she didn't deserve any sweets. He goes to aisle next to the cans and inspects the brands of sour gummies. What sweets you did you eat, what was your craving at a cinema. What movies did you like?

A smile forms in his face as he imagines you two watching a horror movie.

His mind liked to do that to him, three months into the year and he still couldn’t let you go of his mind. You had stopped wearing the tie, the sweater, the long silky black tights. Instead, you wore the loose summer shirt, your hairstyle changed and short socks. Futakuchi reassures himself that he's simply suffering from heatstroke, he was sure of it. At least now in the holidays, he wasn’t seeing you everyday.

He hears a few cans fall and a quiet 'shit' come from his mum's voice. He tries to not laugh as he walks towards the next aisle, thinking of a witty thing to say to his mum.

“Happens to everyone,” he stops in his tracks as he hears that voice, that voice he’s heard so many times. In the lazy afternoons as you pick up Mai from the gym, in the busy courtyard, in his dreams.

He looks like a madman, trying to look through a empty space in the aisle to confirm his suspicion. He finds a spot, big enough to show his face, and he has an angled spot, where he can perfectly see your back and his mother's face.

Your hair is loose and shiny under the cheap supermarket light. You're wearing a tight shirt with some denim shorts and slides. The first thing he notices are your bare legs and, those shorts did wonders to your ass but his eyes go slowly up and he sees his mother's eyes; a evil glint in them as she stares her son down. He got caught red-handed. He shakes his head as her lips thin out in utter disappointment, he was fucked.

“Oh yes, if you move one, they all fall." His mum's voice goes to a lighter pitch, and he scoffs, she was so different with strangers. His eyes trace your figure as you help put the cans back in place, a few still on the floor.

“It’s like the store wants the cans to drop and for us to be mortified,” his mum laughs and Futakuchi almost pukes, his mum never found anything he said funny.

“Well, thank you, young lady. Not even my horrible son has come and helped me." He glares as his mum squeezes your shoulder lovingly while you give a small laugh, "I'll treat you to something. It's the least I could."

Oh, she was evil. Despite her short stubby legs and the fact that she was a woman, all Futakuchi could see in himself was his mum. He inherited her teasing nature, big brown eyes and love for sour foods. The list goes on, however, the only thing his dad had given Futakuchi was long legs and great athleticism as his mum couldn't catch a ball to save her life.

“Oh, thank you, but my friends are waiting for me,” you look down and Futakuchi can only assume you're checking your phone. “The train should be arriving in 3 minutes.”

“Oh my, go on, I’ll do the rest!” Before you can open your mouth, Futakuchi’s mum pushes you, “you’ll be late!”

“Thank you! See ya!” You wave and Futakuchi ducks, just in case you saw him. You definitely weren’t going to make it, it was at least another 5 minute run to get to the nearest station. He feels his heart race at the chance of connecting eyes with you again, however when he turns back, all he sees are beige dress pants. He looks up to see her frown, prominent and god, he really is like her.

"You are absolutely embarrassing." She continues shopping and Futakuchi follows her behind, like a little kid. He pouts, looking to the candy aisle.

"Says the one who dropped the cans," she whips her head, giving a mean glare again.

"Says the one who didn't have the guts to talk to a pretty girl." His eyes widen and she scoffs, unimpressed with his reaction. "Kenji, you’re my son. I saw you ogle her."

She walks off, grumbling about how disrespectful he is and how 'Takanobu doesn't treat his mother like this'. Futakuchi slightly slouches his shoulders, she always did this; throw a small tantrum to make him feel bad.

And for once, it worked.

"Wait mum," he walks next to her and takes the bags full of vegetables and meat, facing away from her. He couldn't tell his mum, oh, sorry I was too embarrassed to help, that's the girl I fantasize about almost daily,. "I'm sorry, I know her."

"What, you like her?" His face reddens and he ignores how his mum's eyes soften. She gives a sigh before smiling, "well that was your chance to talk to her, dummy."

"I don't exactly want you as the audience." His mum laughs, sarcastically, like always, and links her arm with his. She pulls him back to the candy aisle, ignoring how her son's eyes light up.

"Well, if you two end up dating, she's going to meet me regardless." She looks at the snacks before picking up a bag of sour patch kids and bitecrawlers. He tries to ignore every single thought that involves you meeting his awful parents. She gives him little push and her smirk appears, "but she's way too kind for you, you'd poison her with your rotten attitude."

"Thanks."

He gets home and lays in bed, recounting every single thing that happened that day. Your outfit, your specific words and the fact that you helped his mum out.

You had said friends, plural, did that mean Mai but you were embarrassed to just say 'friend'? Perhaps Mai and other girls? Other boys? Maybe not Mai at all, and just a group of boys. He throws a pillow on his face, letting the quick coolness refresh his face before it becomes too suffocating.

Fuck, it was definitely a date. You looked too cute for just a hang out with friends.

He suddenly sits up as he coughs, his saliva going the wrong way.

"Kenji, Takanobu's here!" His thoughts stop as he sighs, opening his door. Aone is there ready, in his tall quiet glory. They both nod and get their books out, the fan being the only noise. Kenji brought glasses of waters and sour patch kids, much to Aone's clear disgust. Their summer homework goes well and unbothered until Futakuchi starts looking around his room, his athletics trophies, a rubbish bin that needed to be emptied, and Aone’s phone. He couldn’t use his own phone to stalk you, he wanted zero evidence of his attraction for you.

At least if he did it through Aone’s phone, he wasn’t visibly guilty of anything.

"You have instagram right?" Aone slowly nods his head, wary of where this conversation was going. They both eye his phone, Futakuchi clenching his hands under the table, he felt like an idiot.

"Can I," Futakuchi gulped, "Can I use your phone for a bit?"

Aone passes Futakuchi his phone, slowly and slightly worried.

"Don't worry, I won't snoop."

Aone is behind Futakuchi, watching his every move as Futakuchi searches Mai_Nametsutsu and finds her easily. She was the type to post monthly and then delete after 6 months. However, her instagram story was another thing, she posted daily on that. Futakuchi’s breath stops as he realizes that Mai’s profile is you two posing like Charlie’s angels. He needed to check instagram more often.

He presses on her story, quickly. He sees years worth of stories and clicks until he’s on the last quarter, slowing down. He takes a deep breathe as the first photo of you appears, your tongue is out as you both had gone out and gotten bubble tea. It was a brown sugar, he mentally scoffs, basic but cute. He continues clicking until he hits the jackpot, He sees a cute sundae, drizzled in chocolate cookies, banana and strawberries. She's captioned it, summer ain’t so bad with friends:) y/nl/nnn and tagged a few other girls from school.

His eyes shine as you were just hanging out with your friends. He immediately presses the @ and frowns as your instagram is obviously private, Aone simply lifts an eyebrow at his friend. This was a first, Futakuchi having girl issues. Futakuchi smacks his face against Aone’s phone, groaning loudly. He had a small look into your life but he wanted more. He had been taking small sips of water but he felt the need to take a massive gulp.

Beep.

Fuck.

"Shit, Aone," his eyes widen as he realizes that he's send a request to you. His heart feels like it's going to explode. He hears Aone make a deep voice in his throat and Futakuchi wants the ability to reverse time. He wants to have never seen you, he had never spoken to you, why was he so intrigued by a stranger who was scared of him. Aone shakes Futakuchi's shoulders, his eyes deeply worried and an equally embarrassed face. "I'm sorry!"

“Send her a message.” Aone stares him down, and Futakuchi’s brain shortcircuits at even the thought of messaging you.

“I can’t,” Futakuchi pleads with his eyes, “she’s terrified of me. She’ll think I’m a weirdo, using your account to stalk her.”

Aone lets go and Futakuchi feels the pressure release from his shoulders.

“I'll do anything, except talk to her.” He bows on his knees. “I’m sorry.”

Aone nods and sits back down in his spot. They’re in a quiet, awkward silence. It’s suffocating him more than a pillow to his face and the desire to simply go on a run and never come back is strong.

“You should tell her, or start talking to her,” Futakuchi whips his head as Aone talks, “you’re not a bad guy for liking someone. It’s natural, you just need to be honest with yourself and one day have the courage to say hi.”

Was Aone giving him advice? On love?

“That’s…” Futakuchi gives a small sigh, “that’s actually helpful, Aone.”

Beep

They both stare at Aone’s phone, as a notification appears.

y/nl/nnn accepted your friend request.

y/nl/nnn is following you! Say hi!

“Oh my god,” Futakuchi’s mouth is open in shock. You accepted Aone’s friend request? Why? Before any more questions can appear in his head, Aone slides his phone to his pocket, smirking slightly.

“You get to look at her photos when you make friends with her.”

“Huh?” Futakuchi is now the one shaking Aone’s shoulders, eyes pleading. “I will get you non-stop kuri kinton, for a month.”

Aone shakes his head, a smile threatening to come out.

“They lose the great taste if I eat them all the time.”

“You asshole!” Futakuchi pushes Aone and tries to go for his pocket. They’re both laughing as they wrestle for Aone’s phone before Futakuchi’s sister opens the door loudly. They both stare at her, surprised and confused over her angry face.

“Can you two be quiet? I have friends over too,” Futakuchi simply pulls his tongue at her and she slams the door shut. “You’re gross!”

Futakuchi puts on his jacket as the soft wind blows through the open doors, brown leaves threatening to come in. He likes autumn, it's relaxing and calming to see the trees get more brown and to wear fuzzy socks around his house.

"Hey Mai," Futakuchi's eyebrows frown more as Kamasaki's loud voice appears, "your friend is kinda cute!"

Futakuchi's eyebrows twitch, his day was bad from the moment he woke up, he left his bento at home, stepped on a deep puddle and cue to now; Kamasaki being himself. He hates how Kamasaki speaks of you so easily. His voice is heard through out the whole gym, almost as if Kamasaki wants you to know his interest in you. He hates Kamasaki's big arms, his horribly dyed blonde hair and above all else, his laugh. It's cackly, loud and ugly. Futakuchi can't help but wonder what you consider attractive in someone, because it can't be Kamasaki.

Mai gives a quick look to you as you stand outside, reading something on your phone. Futakuchi glances at you, you were back to your normal uniform; the beige sweater, black tights and now there was a cute red scarf wrapped around your neck, covering your mouth. “Well, she technically is, but she's a bit shy."

Kamasaki laughs and it makes Futakuchi want to punch him, he clenches his fists as he hold the metallic pole.

Would you even be with some like Kamasaki?

The image of you and Kamasaki walking together makes Futakuchi's blood boil and he feels like kicking something into space.

“As if she’d be interested in you,” Futakuchi says, walking by, “she probably doesn’t like gorillas.”

“Futakuchi!” Kamasaki essentially growls, his mood changing immediately, “does she like stuck-up, arrogant dickheads?”

“Tsk, I don’t know,” he turns, giving a glare, “but I know your mother does.”

Futakuchi shouldn't be surprised why he and Kamasaki were suspended from practice for that week.

It's the day before Valentine's day.

And he's managed to glare at you slightly less.

"Why do you like her?" Aone asks, as they walk together out of the gym. Futakuchi tilts his head, also confused. He wasn't sure when or how but he just did. He breathes into his scarf, trying to set his thoughts straight.

“I don't know.... She’s the type of help someone, even if it’s not beneficial for her. She’s got a weird laugh that makes me wish I could make her laugh like that and Kamasaki finds her cute." He sighs and stops as he realizes that he's spoken his thoughts out loud. He covers his mouth and looks around to see if anyone was close enough to hear.

"Hm," Aone says in response. They walk in comfortable silence and Futakuchi moves his shoulders, they feel lighter than usual.

"Have you told that cute girl that you like her yet?" he takes his shoes off before clicking his tongue quietly, today was the day to bother him about you.

"You'll be happy to know," he stands up, putting his slippers on, "it's none of your business!"

He hears his mum click her tongue in the kitchen. He really needed to stop being like his mum.

"Jeez, it's been almost a year Kenji," she yells, cooking something. Futakuchi's nose twitches as he smells something sweet, "just rip the band-aid off."

He stomps to the kitchen, and before he can say anything, a spoon drenched with thick chocolate is in front of his mouth.

"Let me teach you how to make chocolate!" His mum gives a big smile, she was in a good mood, Futakuchi thinks to himself. "And while we're making it, you can tell me about this girl."

"What makes you think I want to talk about her to you," he says cynically, leaning on the counter.

"Oh, stop being difficult," she hits him with a wooden spoon on his arms. "Girls don't like difficult boys."

"You're funny."

"I'm serious Kenji," she sighs before leaning on the counter next to him. In front of them is a board filled with photos. One stands out the most, in the middle is a Polaroid of Futakuchi as a baby trying to walk with his mum holding his chubby hands, giving a big toothy grin. "You're a wonderful boy when you want to be. You just need to believe it."

Before he can say anything, his mum continues.

"So let's make some cute chocolates for dad and this girl!" She slaps his shoulder before giving a squeeze. Futakuchi gives a small smile and nods, deciding to not be difficult for once.

"Isn't it the girl's job to give chocolates?"

"Who cares, if you like someone, you should just give them chocolates any day."

So, they talk. Futakuchi lets his feelings out, obviously not the wet dreams but he's pretty sure his mum is aware of that happening with how often Futakuchi washes his undies and bedcovers. He tells her about how it was essentially love at first sight and then you wouldn't leave his sight. He tells her about stalking you through Aone's phone and getting suspended for fighting Kamasaki over a stupid comment.

"Well, it sounds like she knows who you are but you haven't made it clear you're interested in her."

"No shit," he puts his head down in shame as his mum glares at him, "sorry, it's an automatic response."

"Well, I'm sure she'll realize you're interested once you give her these!" She passes Futakuchi the three cute chocolate bears, each one in a different position. He hesitantly grabs them, before putting them in the fridge.

"Or I could just eat them." His sister pops out, giving a grin.

"Shut up," he flick at her nose before going to his room. He had less than 24 hours to plan everything, he stares at his ceiling, pondering what to say or how to even confess.

It's Valentine's day. And he slept a total of 2 hours. He yawns while getting ready, the bags under his eyes more than obvious.

"You look handsome, sleeping beauty," his mum passes him his bento and he just groans, did he look that bad?

He doesn't walk as fast to school as he usually does. He's looking at the window more than usual in class, expecting to see you walking around in your sports uniform. Despite the fact that it's the end of winter, his body feels sweaty and almost humid.

He goes to the courtyard at lunch, expecting to see you in your usual y/n glory with Mai blabbering off.

Today is the one day he doesn't see you or Mai in the courtyard.

"Have you seen Mai today?" He asks Obara as they sit on a table, they both look at the table that is usually occupied by you two.

"Nope, apparently she's planning to confess."

"Who's confessing?" Futakuchi says fast before realizing who they're talking about.

"Mai...?" Obara gives a weird look but continues talking, mainly about the upcoming practice games and how he wishes he got some chocolates. Futakuchi nods and replies but his mind is stuck on you, where had you gone? The most logical answer was that you were with Mai, in the classroom or toilets, trying to hype her up.

Maybe you were planning to confess to someone today as well.

"Futakuchi!" He stares at Obara, who just laughs. "You looked like you were going to kill someone for a second there."

"Daydreaming much?" He feels a rough pat on his head and glares up at Kamasaki, who's giving a grin. "Guess who gave me chocolates?"

Futakuchi's mind and heart are thumping, there's no way. You were better than that. You helped his mum for god's sake, how could you like Kamasaki, of all people. Futakuchi takes a deep breathe, even if it's true, his annoying upperclassman can't know about his own feelings for you.

"Your mother gave me chocolates too, ya know?" Kamasaki bites his inner cheek, trying to not explode. They're both glaring at each other, both too mad to dwell on anything else.

"Futakuchi, you really have to stop saying that type of stuff," Moniwa sighs, pushing them apart before Aone does it more successfully.

"Anyways, a hot third year gave me chocolates," Kamasaki brags, flaunting the cheap chocolate around. Futakuchi's eyes slightly widen as he realizes you didn't confess to Kamasaki.

"I don’t remember asking,” Futakuchi says quietly and before Kamasaki can yell at him, Aone acts as a wall between the two. Futakuchi lets a small smile appear, he still had a chance.

Lunch finishes soon and Futakuchi clicks his tongue as he can't find you anywhere. Maybe you didn't even come to school. He tells Aone if the teacher asks, I'm in the nurse's office.

He’s basically walked the whole building and he turns a corner, giving up before fully crashing into someone. His chest slightly aches as rubs on the painful area.

"Ow," his eyes widen as he sees you on the ground. His chocolates on the floor next to you. He puts his hand out, ignoring how they’re borderline shaking.

“Fuck, sorry,” his throat is undeniably dry and his hands are unbelievably sweaty. He sees how you're holding a box of chocolates, they're obviously homemade and flower-shaped. He ignores how his hands go slightly limp, he ignores the weird sensation in his heart and he definitely ignores how adorable your chocolates look.

“It’s okay, I should be sorry,” You say, his eyes finally meet yours and he’s never wanted a hole to swallow him more. Your eyes are staring into him and he can’t hear anything else besides his heartbeat thumping louder than the school volleyball chants. You avoid his eyes as you take his hand, Futakuchi feels his breathe hitch as he notices your reddening cheeks. He lifts you easily, his eyebrows slightly frown, you look like you're in a rush. "Thank you."

You jog past him. Not even looking back.

Ah. That's how it is.

He picks up the chocolates and notices the small tear drops on the ground. His hands clench on the chocolate, how stupid, what was even the point?

He throws the chocolates in a bin and decides to look outside the window for the rest of the class.

He takes the long route to his house.

“How was your day?” His mum asks while eating chocolates in the living room.

“Shit, going to bed.” He goes up the stairs and falls on his bed, feeling his pillows get slowly wet with his tears. He felt empty, hollow with a rejection that didn't even happen.

“Hey, did she like the chocolates?” She seats on his bed, and rub his head. He hated when she did that, it just made him feel more things in his body.

“No."

"What a bitch," he snorts.

"I didn't have the courage to give them to her."

"Ah, that's okay," before she can say it’s not the destination, it's the journey type bullshit, Futakuchi groans into his pillow.

“Why does Valentine’s Day exist?” He goes through the events that happened and somehow cringes more. He could've just left the chocolates in your locker, fuck, he wanted to smash his head against the wall.

“Every teenager asks themselves that question. I wouldn’t stress about it Kenji, one day you’ll be able to give it to her.”

"Will I?" He stares at his mum, who just gives a small smile before pinching his cheeks. At least he didn't inherit that annoying habit of hers.

“Maybe write her a letter, since talking to her is so difficult.” She gives him a small kiss before standing, "I’m gonna make dinner."

He lays on his bed, wondering what to do with his life. He's hoping you get rejected if you did confess to some idiot. Before his thoughts can get any worse, he hears a notification on his phone.

Aone: just in case it got to your head

Aone: [image]

He swipes up and sees a screenshot from Mai story, her eyes slightly puffy and hands holding the same chocolates you had. not y/n getting me homemade chocolates, hope everyone is jealous!

He almost laughs at the timing of everything.

Futakuchi: fuck you I was fine

Aone: sure sure :)

He sits on his desk, looking at the piece of paper. He gives a big sigh, guess it was now or never, and picks up a pen.

I guess we should start from the beginning.

He writes about his desire and fantasies, how you've managed to plague his every thought in a distorted way. He almost forgets it's a letter and not a diary.

I love sour things but being near you is worse than eating toxic waste (the candies, not actual hazardous material).

He sighs as he looks at the two pages, filled with words and nonsense. Futakuchi doesn't dare to read it because he might die of embarrassment and burn these secret words. He lays his head on his desk, fiddling with his pen. He folds the papers and tucks them in an car-themed envelope from his 10th birthday party.

“One day I’ll have the courage,” he sighs before putting the card in his desk drawer, hidden from his eyes and everyone else’s.

to y/n, who, one day, I will talk to.

note: this is significantly longer and very inspired by the spotify playlist 'futakuchi kenji hours' by 'franwyy' ;))

also damn they better show date tech timeskip in the 2 movies we're getting,,,,

ALSOO if u have any suggestions, i'm always a message away, i love hearing other people's ideas!! I might do a cheeky little aone fic that i've been writing for a bit but it'll take a while since uni and work have been taking all my time apologiessss<3

#futakuchi kenji #haikyuu!! #x reader #fluff #fanfic #angst #haikyuu #futakuchi #also i have mixed feelings abt the movies #hope it's not rushed #beta fic?? #probably some writing mistakes #I apologise

[tonytonwy]

AO3 donators, it’s voting time. And one particular candidate not only doesn’t understand AO3 on a fundamental level (somehow, despite being a tenured user and an unfortunate volunteer) but actively wants to push censorship. They are the exact kind of person we don’t need involved with OTW or AO3 for that matter. The same kind of person we have to actively fight against like, all the time. I frankly don’t know how the hell they even became a volunteer but, anyway. Got vote for people who won’t actively work to destroy it.

Tons more info in the reddit thread here https://www.reddit.com/r/AO3/comments/wlxk3m/otw_board_election/

There’s already several posts around here on tumblr of people with the same worries, but not enough imo.

#ao3 #vote if you can!!

[tonytonwy]

[he’s saying something really dumb]

#rottmnt #i love these turtles