blondberry

[blondberry]

#bad buddy #bl

[blondberry]

Me, on the welcome desk in the library: Good morning, how are you today?

Customer: I have welcomed Jesus into my heart and so I am well today and every day.

Me, a little unnerved: Okay then! Is there something I can help you with?

Customer, digging around in his bag and pulling out an iPhone in a box: Unfortunately, Jesus can't help me with this fucking phone, so I came to the library.

#funny how this happened to me in spirits #like sister M was never preachy and always sweet #but she needed me for her iphone bc her niece was far away and I don't know where the lord was #but I was closer I guess 🙏🏻 #libraries are wonderful

[blondberry]

Tagging this with gay fandoms sorry

There's currently a European proposition to ban conversion practice in Europe

If you're European please sigh it

If you're not please reblog

[blondberry]

of course brennan’s vip ep was an art house film about the metaphor of the self through the lens of false dream logic and time loops delivered by a wild man from the woods who is also a physicist from Newfoundland who carries around rocks in a briefcase that he has to hatch and doesn’t know the word alligator but does know the words centrifugal force and is afraid of bowls. of course.

#crazy and incredible #very important people #dropout

[blondberry]

happy anniversary to whatever is going on in this show

#best show in the whole wide world #black sails

[blondberry]

I think the reason so many LOTR ripoffs fail is because they make their Aragorn analogue the main character, when the entire point of Aragorn is that he’s “the person the villains think is the main character, but is Not.”

Aragorn seems like a traditional King Arthur style hero— he has huge Main Character Energy because he’s supported by destiny, by bloodline, by all these magic artifacts and prophecies, and etc etc. Frodo and Sam are Just Some Guys. Aragorn recognizes that Sauron understandably thinks he’s the main hero of this story ….and he pretends to believe it too, spending the entire series using himself as a diversion to prevent Sauron from seeing Frodo and Sam.

Aragorn’s whole thing is that knows he seems like the Main Hero of this legend to people who don’t know better —- but he also knows that he isn’t, and that his role is just to keep Sauron’s eye on him in order to protect the people around him.

And it works! Sauron is so fixated on defeating his Legendary Destined Archenemy with Extreme Main Character Energy that he completely overlooks the two ordinary little guys who were the real threat to him all along.

#yessss #lord of the rings #lotr

[blondberry]

Captain Extra™

#I'm not into muscular men but #captain extra has my ass and my heart #captain america #mcu

[blondberry]

we used to watch skam clips on google drive. we used to be a society

#and I was not even that young of an adult at that time #it was so long ago I'm feeling hurt #skam

[blondberry]

Yok + bullying Dan.

#I'm sure I reblogged this before but god do I love Yok #not me #bl

[blondberry]

#happy it's gonna be may day to all of us who celebrate

[blondberry]

#mike trapp my beloved #so many incredible gremlins on dropout #mike trapp #game changer #dropout

[blondberry]

Miw, Neo, Shin, 3 Will be Free | OST MV

#my loves #3 will be free #bl

[blondberry]

Exactly 20 years ago (give or take a few days) like most French schoolchildren I was given a piggy bank to collect yellow coins (small change). It was a charity campaign called Opération Pièces Jaunes, to help hospitalised children, but my classmates & I were quite indifferent to the charity aspect because all we cared about was the fact that our teacher started giving us a candle in the shape of President Jacques Chirac every time we returned our little box filled with coins. 

We were completely enraptured by those candles and the way the president’s face would start melting hideously if we let them burn long enough. Without any kind of deliberation among ourselves we turned it into a class-wide contest—it was obvious to everyone that the point of the Yellow Coins charity campaign was to win many little Chiracs and melt them to make the face of our president as freakishly deformed as possible. We exchanged them for pogs and marbles. We had recently learnt about the Plague in history class, with great relish, hence one lucky girl who managed to obtain a particularly monstrous half-melted face with a big wax bubble reminiscent of a bubo sold it way above the going rate, for 12 galaxy marbles—a fortune. (I was among the losers of this auction, and commented in my diary, with deep regret, “It’s just what it would look like if the President had the bubonic plague!”) Every day after school we went round town begging passersby for coins with something akin to mania in order to get more Chiracs to burn into ever ghastlier shapes. An old lady we ambushed in front of the church praised us warmly for our charitable spirit.

Eventually our teacher ran out of candles and this odd chapter of my childhood ended as abruptly as it had started. Our class was congratulated in front of the whole school for being by far the most ardently devoted to the cause (we got ~15kg of coins.) I wonder if the principal asked our teacher what her secret was to make us collect a truly astonishing amount of coins compared to the other classes, and how he reacted when she replied that she motivated us with busts of the President. One teacher gave a Carambar for a full box of coins, another believed that helping sick children should be incentive enough, but our teacher, an expert in child psychology, was alone in her conviction that the best way to go about this was to hand out human wax effigies for her students to burn.

#I kept reading and thinking I never got to burn Chirac #this is insane #I regret this was not my childhood

[blondberry]

I will forever respect Animorphs for tricking kids who are just really into animals to read a book series by going “Hey you, you daydream about what it’s like to be a dolphin or a bird or a wolf? Have I got a book for you!” and then slowly radicalizing them with 50+ books of “There are no winners in war. Whatever ‘victory’ you perceive comes at the cost of sacrificing your own morals and killing the part of you that is human. In the end you will resort to murder, torture and war crimes and the knowledge of what you have done will haunt you for as long as you live.”

#animorphs

[blondberry]

How long have you been leaning in the other direction?

#sure jan. #welcome to the bi life buck #911 abc

[blondberry]

i’m obsessed with the mum from ponyo. driving single lane on a cliff edge? drift those turns in your nissan cube. husband has to work an extra shift? tell him to fuck off in morse code. pet fish turned into a child on your driveway? adopt her. town drowned in a tsunami? leave your 5 year old in charge, he’s the man of the house now

#she's incredible I love her I couldn't handle her #ponyo #ghibli #hayao miyazaki

[blondberry]

#unbelievable #(joking I knew and expected it) #(incredible)