brokengirlsummer

[brokengirlsummer]

947 days! Who would’ve thunk it. Proud of myself.

#sh recovery #self harm recovery #selfharm #self harm #s3lf h@rm #s3lf h4rm #s3lfharm

[brokengirlsummer]

885 days later and all of a sudden wishing I wasn’t in recovery

#sh recovery #self harm recovery #self destructive #selfharm #s3lf h@rm #s3lf h4rm #s3lfharm

[brokengirlsummer]

LMAO

BPD Support Groups be like…

[brokengirlsummer]

[brokengirlsummer]

I wanna break it I wanna break it I wanna break it so motherfucking bad

[brokengirlsummer]

Someone tell me I’m worth it because I sure as hell won’t tell myself

[brokengirlsummer]

I’m tired of living a life consumed by suicidal ideation and self harm

[brokengirlsummer]

Tw: mention of suicide and suicidal ideation; self harm ideation; bipolar; and being drunk and depressed.

#notfuckingthriving

Hello. I am drunk and happy but simultaneously sad bc I know that when I wake up tomorrow I will be faced with my problems once again and all I wanna do is cut. And I hate bipolar. I’m very frustrated. Functioning is hard. And I am BARELY gonna make it through the semester. Someone at my school committed suicide and I’ve never felt so triggered. All I wanna do is cut:)) and right now, I also want to die. But I don’t feel inclined to act on my plan which is nice. I just want to die until things get better. Which is escape. I want an escape. I want things to get better. Life is so fucking brutal and I hate mental illness.

Reallyyyyy considering breaking the 282 day streak of being self harm free.

Does this shit ever get fucking better?!!!

#tw mention of suicide #tw mention of suicidal ideation #I’m so tired of this fucking shit #mental illness #bipolar #cutting #cvtting #fuck everything #I’m drunk and depressed

[brokengirlsummer]

no time for selfcare, busy wanting to die

[brokengirlsummer]

Wow. Wasn’t suicidal for a whole 20? days.

Too bad all I can think about now is yeeting :))))

#self harm #suicidal #tw sh #tw sui thoughts #tw suicidal ideation #bipolar #bipolar ii #depression #depressed

[brokengirlsummer]

Lmfaoooo

“are you okay” mf you’ve seen my blog you tell me

[brokengirlsummer]

[brokengirlsummer]

Just wanna say that I hope you’re all okay. And if you’re not that’s cool too—just remember you deserve love and kindness

#sh recovery #self harm #mental health #mental illness #bipolar #ptsd #anxiety #depression #validation

[brokengirlsummer]

Manically tore through all the shit I keep under my sink to see if I kept the utility knife. Was simultaneously resentful and glad I threw it away because I was ready to fuck shit up. Found two unused disposable shaving razors, ripped the razor part off one, and then violently used scissors to get those blades out as if I only had seconds before a bomb went off.

I had a feeling it would be dull, based on other posts around here so I tried it on my hand. Hurt way too much to not go deep into my skin, so I grabbed the knife sharpener from the kitchen, returned to the bathroom, and sharpened the blades the way my dad taught me how to sharpen kitchen knives.

Got in the shower. Was ready to do it. But then I reflected on how I knew I didn’t have the right blade to get to the depth I want nor the blood I want. So. I just left those tiny razors on the ledge of the bathtub and I took a shower with the temperature as hot as it could go.

Now, I’m in bed trying to quiet extremely intrusive suicidal thoughts while also restraining myself from doing 90mph on the highway to get to the nearest lowes

[brokengirlsummer]

I feel like now that I’ve hit 200 I can break it. Like once winter comes closer I can just say fuck it and then stop again in March or whatever

#cvtting #self mutalition #s3lf h@rm #s3lfharm #s3lf h4rm #fuck me #fuck this

[brokengirlsummer]

Happy or not I made it

#self harm recovery #sh recovery #cvtting #s3lf h@rm #s3lfharm #s3lf h4rm

[brokengirlsummer]

Would love if someone messaged me pics so I can vicariously live through you

#cvtting #self harm #s3lf h4rm #s3lf h@rm #s3lfharm