delta-for-change

[delta-for-change]

( ♡,♡,♡,♡ )

for @walk-in-the-wood

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hey everyone sorry I’ve been offline!!! I’m still here, but just immensely busy. I’m currently leaving a domestic violence situation and GOD has it been hard, but these are the first steps.  I’ll be online on and off- so sorry if I didn’t reply to some messages but I’m still here!! Just stressed, scared, and busy. 

#enoch #pro ana #proana #ana #anorexia #anoreixa #pro mia #promia #mia #bulimia #bulimiia #bulimix #anamia #ednos #thinspo #thinspiration #meanspo #sweetspo #bonespo #ed #ed tw #eating disorder #eating disorder tw #eating disoder tw #eating disroders #just ed things #binge eating

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the body positivity movement needs to start moving hard into including disabled bodies and this is what I mean by that. yes, it was a good step forward to change the rhetoric from “your body is a good body if it meets these arbitrary aesthetic standards” to “your body is a good body because it completes these tasks for you” (ie: walking, eating, laughing, hugging, etc.) but that rhetoric is still not fully body positive, because it excludes bodies that do not do these things. the same as saying how we need to “focus on healthy bodies not skinny bodies” sounds good at first, but it completely misses the point that unhealthy bodies deserve to be appreciated too. disabled bodies are still beautiful and still fundamentally good, not because “your body is kind to you so you should be kind to your body”- because not everyone’s body is kind to them. but all bodies are still good bodies because they are what houses your soul. your body is what allows you to exist and live your life in whatever way you live it, and for that reason, it is a good and beautiful body. your body is what your loved ones see when they look at you and the love they feel for it as an extension of you makes it a good and beautiful body. your body doesn’t have to look a certain way or behave a certain way to be good. it is good just for being here.

**edit**

if you don’t like this post that’s fine. if you don’t agree with this post that’s fine. I am literally just a person, a real person behind this account, who isn’t a fucking disability activist for a living, I’m just Some Guy who has a degenerative chronic pain condition and was frustrated with language I was hearing. if you’re frustrated with language you’re hearing here, make your own post about it. don’t fucking derail the fact that this makes me and many other people feel better. don’t fucking tell me I’m wrong when I’m not fucking talking to you. if this post doesn’t resonate with you, then guess what- it’s not for you. I didn’t tag you in it so you can just move on. I said what I needed to hear and there are some people who needed it too. if you arent one of them, don’t try to make us feel shitty for trying to make our lives as bearable as possible.

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trisha paytas memes? where? queen you are seeing stuff

HUH. Are you kidding me i- there were a TON yesterday, I promise... (went searching and there doesn't seem to be much today, but still found a few after scrolling. It's by this guy @/smegmafactory )

#enoch #asks #this is weird

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wtf are all the trisha paytas memes by that one weirdo guy about??? plz tell me I’m not the only one seeing this

#enoch #pro ana #proana #ana #anorexia #anoreixa #pro mia #promia #mia #bulimia #bulimiia #bulimix #anamia #ednos #thinspo #thinspiration #meanspo #sweetspo #bonespo #ed #ed tw #eating disorder #eating disorder tw #eating disoder tw #eating disroders #just ed things #binge eating

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dream blunt rotation

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Skin picking things

I know no one wants to talk about skin picking because it’s “gross” and not as relatable but screw it, I’ve just gotta vent

The vortex, when you’re just gonna pick at that one spot and then boom it’s 20 minutes later

When you KNOW you don’t have time right now and I swear if start now you’re going to miss the bus but you can see a spot there and you’ve gotta get it

Sitting there soaking up blood from five different spots on your face wondering why you’re still doing this

You hate using bandaids because they’re so obvious but if you don’t use them you know you’ll pick

Never having clear skin

Finally getting clear skin, but only for an hour because you can feel a bump under the surface and you’ve gotta pick

When it hurts to touch it but you push through it because you just need to pick it

Suddenly noticing that you’re picking

Having to avoid mirrors

Trying so hard to maintain some self-control because you need nicer skin for an event and finally bursting after it’s over and picking everything

False hope when picking momentarily makes your skin look better before it inevitably turns worse

When you know it’s bad for you, making your skin worse, painful, annoying, embarrassing, and causing you problems, but you JUST. CAN’T. STOP.

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to “newbies” in the ana community:

this is gonna be a long one but if the title applies to you, i IMPLORE you to read the whole thing. if it doesn’t, please reblog. you might save someone from this fucking nightmare.

i found a diary entry on the day that i decided to go on tumblr and search up “thinspo”. i was feeling awful about my body for some time but never really thought about calories or eating less or anything.

i wrote (verbatim): “i don’t want to have an eating disorder or anything, i just want to lose 10lbs”

not even a month later, it was like nothing could stop me from reaching my goal. i kept telling myself i wasn’t in too deep. i ate 500 cals a day and no more. i exercised 300 cals away.

now, the only thing i want is that blissful ignorance. not even thinking twice about my body. not caring what i ate. understanding the boundaries of healthy eating. not feeling faint and dizzy when standing up.

I WISH THAT I HAD SEEN A POST TELLING ME THAT IF YOURE LOOKING AT THINSPO “just to motivate you,” THIS IS THE BEGINNING OF A PROBLEM AND THE START OF A CYCLE YOU WILL REGRET EVER BEGINNING AS SOON AS YOU REALIZE YOU HAVE NO CONTROL OVER YOUR ADDICTION TO STARVING. at this time in my life i would listen to NOBODY and NO POST could stop me from slowly crawling into the arms of my developing eating disorder. BUT IM BEGGING YOU, IF YOU ARE BEGINNING THIS STRUGGLE, GET OUT WHILE YOU STILL HAVE CONTROL. you see all these posts telling you that over 1,000 calories is disgusting and so on, DO NOT LISTEN. PLEASE! you have no idea how quickly this shit can get in your head. no matter what your intentions for going on the ana tags are, LEAVE THEM NOW IF YOU STILL CAN. LEAVE AND DONT LOOK BACK. OR ELSE YOU WILL END UP DISORDER RIDDEN AND HATING YOURSELF LIKE ME, because once you’ve been here long enough, it doesn’t matter if you hit your UGW or you’re still at your sw; you will always always always see yourself as fat. that is a promise. and it’s disgusting.

this is a dirty, horrible disease that teaches you to hate yourself. it perpetuates symptoms of anxiety and depression and causes thoughts and feelings that you never believed possible in yourself. it destroys your identity, your relationships, you family life, your grades, your ambitions, and your health. if you have a choice not to fall into it, DONT FUCKING DO IT. don’t fucking do it for the love of god.

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Not exactly ED, but definitely used for this purpose: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4ciEFkTxUELwUnyeRbE6Yc?si=1571dbf176da4602 :)  My favorite song for ED purposes is ‘Hungover in the City of Dust’ though :)

Any good ed songs recommendations?

#enoch #just a casual spotify drop #send me your playlists

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A part of growing up and becoming an adult that we don’t talk about enough is when you get really obsessed with oatmeal

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lonely girls my beloved. i see you staying in your room, i see you standing in grocery store aisles feeling the sudden wave of isolation wash over you. i understand how badly you want and how bad that makes you feel. i get it. we're not alone. but we are.

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You are not an intruder into a space just for being there, you have a right to exist

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soft reminder: a lot of things on social media can romanticize certain things about depression or mental illness. if you’re trying to recover, try not to internalize posts that imply that doing the unhealthy coping mechanism is the more attractive or cool option. it isn’t, it is a consequence of having a mental illness and sometimes believing subtle things like that can affect your recovery. I know those posts are a way to cope but what you see and believe on social media matters a lot, especially if you’re younger and more impressionable, and it’s best to be more careful with subtle things like that.

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Adding on to this post with some information and links! It’s important, y’all. Don’t strive for this. 

And here: 

PLUS, thigh gaps (like the one in the picture OP was showing around) also has largely to do with how someone is standing:

See the difference? That has nothing to do with weight! All to do with stance. And remember that photoshop exists.  THIS POST IS really good and informative too about this!!! 

Another good post and where I got most of these images from is HERE.

i’ve mentioned to two people that i think thigh gaps are cute and that i’d like to have one and BOTH people i told were such assholes about it. i showed my cousin a picture bc she didn’t understand what i meant and i shit you not she said “well you’re never gonna get there because you’re body isn’t shaped like that.” and my bestfriend said “you know thigh gaps are nearly impossible to get” and those two things were said to me TODAY. it just made me want to work harder so i can prove them wrong. im literally so fucking close to having a thigh gap and i can’t wait to rub it in their face.

this was the picture i showed my cousin :

#enoch #pro ana #proana #ana #anorexia #anoreixa #pro mia #promia #mia #bulimia #bulimiia #bulimix #anamia #ednos #thinspo #thinspiration #meanspo #sweetspo #bonespo #ed #ed tw #eating disorder #eating disorder tw #eating disoder tw #eating disroders #just ed things #binge eating